#and because he'll kill the guy that vash just tried to not kill and i think that's extremely funny

[stefisdoingthings]

ark aftermath

[eleplay]

Going through the experience of loving the trigun anime as a child but realizing you forgot like 60% of what happens in it. Hornfreaker?!? Is not manga only??? He Was in the anime??? And somehow, I forgot about the saxophone assassin??!?

(But on a different note I’m very interested to see if Vash as the Most Tortured Soul Ever is the same in each adaptation vs the manga? I don’t remember that being the case in the 90’s show but apparently I’ve forgotten everything about the Gun Ho Guns arc. I love comic adaptations! And I’m enjoying your comics posting!)

like most of the gung ho guns he doesn't actually do much, so i could definitely see why you might have forgotten about him. the silly glee i feel whenever i see the word HORNFREAK or drawings of him blasting on his saxophone mid-battle tho... it's unmatched.

yeah i have no idea how the adaptations play it! but i want to acknowledge that i tend to feel indifferent to actively annoyed by shonen anime special boy main characters, so i'm probably being overly aware/critical of whenever other characters look at him and explicitly go "wow... how are you still smiling despite it all. damn... what a guy"

sorry i just think it's so corny when you say it out loud like this. also i really wish in general the girls had more going on for them besides special boy commentary. maybe they come back later and do? fingers crossed?

[fuck-you-upmusicbracket]

Sunlight (Hozier)

All the tales the same/Told before and told again/A soul that's born in cold and rain/Knows sunlight, sunlight, sunlight/And at last can grant a name/To a buried and a burning flame/As love and its decisive pain/Oh, my sunlight, sunlight, sunlight

But whose heart would not take flight/Betray the moon as acolyte/On first and fierce affirming sight of/Sunlight, sunlight, sunlight/I had been lost to you, sunlight/And flew like a moth to you, sunlight, oh, sunlight/Oh, your love is sunlight

"I come down with the shivers and start hyperventilating when i hear this song and it makes me want to go outside which is the scariest part"

"I'm not gonna go full infodump here but this song is Peak Vash and Nicholas D. Wolfwood from Trigun-- specifically Nick's feelings towards Vash. Vash's (literal) evil twin brother Knives hired (read: threatened to eradicate the orphanage he kidnapped Nick from as a child if he didn't do what he was told) Nick to act as bodyguard for Vash and guide him to where Knives wants him to go so he can manipulate him for his own gain. Like, he chose the name Knives. This bitch is crazy beyond crazy but this ain't about him. Nick starts out 100% willing to guide Vash like a lamb to slaughter because he HAS to for the orphanage, and this is just some random guy he doesn't know or care about. But then he gets to know Vash, how good of a person he is despite the shit the world (and Knives) has put him through. How he'd rather risk his own life and health than kill another person because he believes he doesn't get to make that choice for people. And despite being someone who'd rather shoot first, pray for them after, Nick starts trying to wound rather than kill just because Vash doesn't like it. It puts them both at risk and he fusses and argues about it and still kills sometimes but he tries anyways. Eventually he decides that he'll do what he can to protect Vash from Knives without provoking him to destroy the orphanage. He ends up caring about him deeply against his own will to the point that his idea of Eden would be to live with Vash and their friends in a peaceful world where none of them have to fight and die. In the manga, Nick's dying request is to see Vash smile again- the genuine smile that he's complimented every time he's seen it. Vash can't give him that, because he knows Nick would see that it was a forced smile. Instead, he just sits with him until he dies. Afterwards, Vash kills willingly for the first time in his entire life (over 150 years. He's not human btw) in order to protect Nick's childhood friend Livio. He wouldn't just do that for just any friend or ally, no, that was out of love. Love so strong he could go against his own mother's teachings that all life matters and people don't get to choose when a life ends, the thing that has kept Vash pacifist all these years, to keep someone that mattered to Nick alive. So while Nick never knew that Vash cared for him the same way he did him, the fact matters that he does."

Your Body, My Temple (Will Wood)

So, when the cattle fall dead and the waters run red, I'll be your lamb's blood on the wall/God isn't dead, but that's exactly what I've been dreading after all the meek inherited fuck all/Jesus Christ, I will die for my own damn sins if you help those who help themselves/My superstitions, your visage, my visions furtherin' the fever of your fervor, for believing, I will

I'll be your blessing in disguise, whip the mask off my good side/I'm all stripped down naked for you but still asking you to loosen up my buttons, baby/You've got my whole world in your hands, got that little blue spot/And you really ain't got no idea how much this thing orbits you, now, do you honey?

"the DEDICATION, the DEVOTION to whoever you can imagine is being sung to...the imagery is so so so good 😩 it's so catchy, it gets stuck in my head every time i listen to it, the emotions are just so good...you can imagine an individual so deeply infatuated with their lover to the point of revering them as holy, to the point of death...the way the word choice just flows so smoothly is so good aughhh- its also got surprisingly good loopability, in my opinion. 10/10 i want to beam this song into my brain it makes me froth from the mouth and shiver like a rabid animal and i'll be DAMNED if i don't make an oc inspired by it eventually. all the lyrics are peak. i am getting riled up just thinking about this song, will wood is elite"

"1. I want to sing this to my Muse. (If I had one...) 2. Will Wood songs just slap. 3. I've listened to the CHnT podcast, and get *all* the references! (Pink Elephant Man starts a cult dedicated to the camp nurse) 4. I'm using this song for the antagonist of my story, who gives yandere vibes."

[sword-dad-fukuzawa]

i'm a huge tea enthusiast so i want nothing more than to project this onto my faves. however. vash is the kind of guy who gets a cup o' joe from the dunkin donuts every morning and wolfwood drinks multiple shots of expresso. neither of these bitches drink tea. KNIVES ON THE OTHER HAND.

I AM GIVING HIM THE PRETENTIOUS INTERESTS HE DESERVES. he hates the smell of coffee. can't stand the taste of it, bristles like a cat if any of it gets near him. has a special tea timer specifically for brewing, and all sorts of fancy tea pots and tea strainers that fill a whole cabinet in his apartment.

he breaks vash's coffee machine one morning out of sheer spite and vash retaliates by flushing his expensive-ass-imported-straight-from-china oolong tea leaves. he nearly kills vash for it (this is a normal tuesday).

he has an entire shelf full of the different teas he drinks. there's everything from genmaicha to osmanthus oolong to white peony and if you dare ask if he's got any lipton, he has to visibly hold himself back from biting you dead.

wolfwood has, of course, tested this empirically. knives did, in fact, try to bite him dead and only the timely intervention of vash coming home from work was able to keep his fool ass alive.

rem was super concerned about knives's budding anger issues when he was growing up and a child psychologist friend of hers suggested that knives get a hobby he could really get obsessed about, just so his yandere tendencies don't get any worse. rem bought him tea.

it wasn't all that fancy--just an 8 dollar jar of tie kuan yin from the local asian market--but knives adored it. rem still sends him a new jar every year on his birthday, and even though knives swears he thinks it's cheap trash, he still somehow portions it out to last the whole year until rem sends him the next one.

when wolfwood came to, uh, "ask" knives if he could date his little brother, he came bearing a tea plant. it was ridiculous, because it's not like knives has the room in their apartment to grow it properly.

but it was just surprising enough, just thoughtful enough (he'd been expecting that the little shit would fight him for vash's hand, tbh) that he accepts the gift. it takes up half the kitchen and he's named it sonata. not that he'll ever admit that to vash, but his brother has sharp ears and heard him whispering sweet nothings to it. it was cute.

and when wolfwood decides he wants both of the twins, he asks knives out to the most expensive, most pretentious teahouse in the area. they have to drive for an hour to get there and knives nearly jumps out of the car/tries to kill him three times.

but the look on his face when he tried their matcha? exquisite. wolfwood is going to savor that expression of sheer delight for a long, long time.

he gets another date out of it, though knives still refuses to kiss him if he tastes like coffee.

[anachronistic-falsehood]

UPSET THAT I CANNOT REPLY TO A POST WITH AN IMAGE. I AM SITTING HERE LIKE THIS THINKING ABOUT VASH/CPHIL PARALLELS:

IM GONNA REPLY TO THIS WITH MY CPHIL/VASH COMPARISON ANALYSIS. BECAUSE THE BRAINROT HAS SET IN AND IT'S KILLING ME.

OK OK ALRIGHT. OK. so first of all. cphil and vash the stampede. angel imagery. lost their best friend. lost their family. lost their home. extreme family issues. vash has a missing arm and phil has a wrecked wing. vash can't use his powers at the end of trimax and phil can't fly anymore. crying. ok so now we've got these fuckin parallels right. ok i'm gonna get into their classpects because they are so similar but so different. this is gonna b under a cut this got away from me i'm so sorry i could talk classpects for HOURSSSSSS

so cPhil to me is a Seer of Life, right? Seers are supposed to guide their fellow players on the right path. cPhil TRIES to do that. right. like he TRIES. but god he is so bad at it. he's so disconnected from mortals in general that he just doesn't know how they work. he thinks they're all doing things wrong and they just need some guidance to do it right!!! and Vash is a Muse of Life to me. lots of parallels here between him and Calliope (seen in this post where i delve into Vash and Knives' classpects).

They're both Life players with the same goals, but with vastly different ways they go about achieving those goals. they just want peace for everyone else, but god they are both so fucking bad at it. they are at opposite ends of a morality scale here. Vash's main focus is keeping people alive and it doesn't matter what he has to do to keep it that way, no matter what happens to himself or whether keeping one guy alive will indirectly result in the deaths of others. Phil's main focus is establishing peace, and he doesn't care what he has to destroy in the meantime to do that, as long as it doesn't harm himself or the people he's close to. To Vash, the ends justify the means. He can sacrifice his own wellbeing to keep others safe as long as no one else gets hurt while he's there. To Phil, the method of getting to his goal matters just as much, because instead of looking at it as just "the ends justify the means" he sees it as "everything i do pushes myself towards achieving what i want, my goal will never be reached without these actions so i might as well do what i want and maybe the destruction will teach everyone a lesson along the way" LIKE HE'S SO FUCKED UP <3

cPhil is so derse dreamer and Vash is so prospit dreamer. THAT'S the big difference!!! they see their actions very differently and that's partially why they act so differently when they have the same goals. Lunar sways are difficult to analyze because there's so much nuance to them, you could have a lot of Prospit traits but have one extremely different trait that could make you a Derse dreamer instead. like it's so weird??? but I once saw a post that summarized it like this: For Prospit dreamers, the end result is more important than the methods it takes to get there; for Derse dreamers, the journey is just as, if not more important, than the end result. Phil HAS to be a Derse dreamer, bc to him his journey is neverending. He's an immortal who has been alive long enough to know that not everyone will see his logic, and he will spend the rest of his life either convincing them to see his ways or he will get rid of those people entirely. To Vash, if he can just convince enough people, if he can just get to others before the destruction occurs, if he can TALK to enough people, maybe the violence will stop one day. It's an IMPOSSIBLE goal, but he keeps trying to look towards that one day where he'll be able to look out at a paradise without death and violence (much like Callie in a lot of ways BUT I'VE ALREADY GONE OVER THAT!!!).

Phil, as a combination Seer and Derse dreamer, knows that the journey is neverending, and he's either given up on pacifism or never tried it in the first place. He SEES that his ideals are not universal, and that knowledge gives him the ability to be apathetic towards other people and destroy what they love to "teach them a lesson." Vash, as a young spry century-and-a-half years old, and as a Muse and Prospit dreamer, still thinks that he can reach his goal of world peace, even though that hopes fades more and more from day to day, but like. his speech near the end of tristamp ep 12 to Knives?? About how he'll just keep going no matter what??? He's not giving up on his ideology because he doesn't SEE. He doesn't KNOWWW that his ideals cannot be universal. Ofc this changes later on in Trimax and he finally takes direct action by killing Legato and gives up on his staunch pacifism, but like. my guy. it took you a LONG ASS TIME to get to this point. my god.

Life players are described as "concerned with the betterment of themselves and those around them, as well as the onward march of positive progress... They also have the tendency to put other's needs before their own, which never ends well for anyone, because the Life-bound can grow bitter if they feel their own self-care has had to be shunted aside. At their best, they are great listeners, caretakers, and nurturers. At their worst, the Life-bound are passive aggressive, and pushy-they're certain they know best.” Both cPhil and Vash are the best and worst of their aspect. They both grow bitter, Vash in Trimax from having to take the high road all the time, and Phil from thinking that no one can see that he knows best. They do listen, and they do care for and nurture others, and they work towards the betterment of others, but sometimes it's people who don't want to be nurtured or bettered. Vash tries to help people who don't want help, and Phil babies cWilbur when he comes back and his "help" towards cTommy is um. not great!! They can both be passive aggressive, and they're both so incredibly sure that they know best. They're both so incredibly stuck in their ways.

Phil is the most stubborn Seer ever, because he only wants to see what will benefit his own life and ideals, not everyone. And Vash, the Muse, keeps on his one-track thought process and resigns himself to doing what he's always done (much like Callie) instead of taking direct action to TRULY change others' lives for the better. They both do finally change this in the very end of their arcs, with Phil reaching out to Niki and retreating to the End with her, Connor, and Kristin, giving up his old lifestyle to help a couple of people he's only known for a couple years and genuinely cared about for much less, basically a blink in his immortal lifespan, and Vash killing Legato to save Livio and Razlo and confronting Knives head on to save the planet.

but like. FUCK, you guys took so long to get just to this point. you are so stuck in your ways you have PROBLEMS

[yellowocaballero]

I would like you to know that I’m pretty sure I’ve gotten irrevocably and irreconcilably attached to your version of knives / Milly / Meryl / Nicholas and now it will be impossible for me to witness anything bad happening to them (also I have no clue if neon and the gang are ocs because I didn’t read trigun but please note I fucking LOVE them and all the worldbuilding here)

Thank you!!!

Neon and his gang are in the manga/98 and they rock super super hard. My favorite bad guys of Trigun. Pure 80s glam, sheer hair metal David Bowie EDM-ass insane man. I don't know at what point I decided it would be funny if he was a trans guy, or why I decided that, but it was very funny. The most important thing was that it set up the very important joke of, "Knives is so incredibly egotistical that the only human body he would ever admire is a body that he made". The absolute zero of aroace.

Thankfully, Knives has also gotten irrevocably and irreconcilably attached to his the humans, and he will also find it impossible to see anything bad happening to them. He'll enforce that. It's mandatory now. Are you arguing with him? Do you like millions of knives? In your face?

But real talk I was super excited for us to get to this point in the story, since I feel like it's one of the most meaningful things we learn about Knives: that he plays it cool and disaffected and he doesn't even LIKE humans, he thinks they're SMELLY, who even CARES - until he pack bonds with you, at which point he goes absolutely bananas apeshit if anything looks at you wrong. Still thinks you're smelly, though.

Honestly. This is because canon Knives is so bugnuts that I decided that it would feel the most right if there was something going on up there. Decided that humans are a threat to him so he kills his ship. Decides that humans are dangerous so he tries to exterminate them. In Stampede especially he is just so incredibly possessive and controlling of Vash, and so hung up on safety for the both of them, that I decided it would be interesting if it was partly a biological thing. Partly because it lets me keep the crazy, and I wanted to maintain as much of their original personalities as possible (difficult, when Knives' personality is "being insane and evil"). Thanks for the ask and thanks for reading!!

[magical-ocean-birb]

I've noticed you reblogging Trigun and Vash? I mean obviously it's an anime/manga, but what's it about? The art looks beautiful so I wanted to know if it's something I'd like to get into! Figured I should ask a fan

Ok so the simplest i can describe it, is that's it's a space western that focuses on both this one guy named Vash, and 2-3 people that usually follow him around for different reasons, while Vash is essentially trying to stop The Big Bad from killing everyone on the planet. He has a gun, but Vash is a massive pacifist, so he usually tries to defuse first in whatever way he can, before he'll shoot to disarm. He has a massive bounty on his head and the title 'Humanoid Typhoon' because natural disaster-level damage tends to follow him.

If that sounds entertaining (it really really is, it's a great series), you have a few different options. You have the manga, which starts with Trigun (2 volumes) and turns into Trigun Maximum (which is 14, if i'm right). I actually haven't read them, but i know it goes way more in depth than the anime, and are pretty good.

As for the anime, you have the original 90's anime, which shows the original awesomeness and absolute silliness of Vash, Meryl, Milly, and Wolfwood as they go on this journey unwillingly (at least initially) together. Personally i like the dub over the sub, but that's just me and what i watched growing up. It's 26 episodes, with one movie.

You now also have a reboot that's currently coming out weekly, Vash, Meryl, and Wolfwood are all still here, we have a new character named Roberto, there's still some silliness, but the tone is definitely more serious and somber than the 90's anime. Things have definitely been changed in the reboot, but i'll reserve judgement until all the episodes are out. That being said, i enjoy it, and at least one of my friends who never watched/read the original is also enjoying it.

I really hope you enjoy it if you choose to watch/read it! And if not, well i'm glad you gave it a shot.

[dreaminpeaches]

New Paracosm AU: Big Hero Beau

@decaykid yes, kind of...

Okay, like I said in my last post this idea came to me after listening to Fist Pump and Viva Namida on loop with pacing.

So you know like how the original Humble Pie paracosm is very western horror kind of drama, yeah? well, this paracosm is just full on ANIME BBY!!! I'm talking Space Dandy, I'm talkin' Gurren Lagann, I'm talkin maybe a little bit of Trigun, and also takes alot from action rpgs like Bayonetta, Devil May Cry, Persona, Viewitful Joe, and Wonderful 101 (but its like only two people), and takes alot from Sonic the hedgehog (mostly Sonic Underground, Sonic Adventure 2, and Sonic Forces), and little bit from Fancy Pants ( that's not an anime or a "real" video game, its just an old flash game I used to hyperfixate on).

This paracosm is completely different which is why I gave it, it's own name instead of just adjective then "!"

This version of Beau takes a lot of inspiration from Dandy ( Space Dandy), Vash The Stampede (Trigun), Sonic The Hedgehog (Sonic The Hedgehog), and Kamina (Gurren Langann)

In this paracosm, both of Beau's parents perished in a tragic accident, Beau takes his siblings to an abandoned shack and they hide out and live out there. the tragedy this motivative Beau to become stronger and a hero, not only to keep his siblings safe but others too. The last thing his mom told him was that his smile could save a thousand lives, so because of that he always keeps an upbeat, go get 'em attitude, and he doesn't want to bum his younger siblings out. His mom also gave Beau her heart shape locket before she passed on, so Beau has worn it ever since that day.

The locket is very precious to him, he doesn't let anyone touch it (other than his siblings), and if he loses it he'll go into a panic attack and can't do anything else until he finds it again.

Dev, Beau's little brother, also wants to be strong and a hero, he tries to train like his brother but he can't keep up. Beau tells Dev that he has to be strong in his own way, so Dev decides to put his tech skills to good use and make his older brother cool weapons for him to use. I forgot to mention in this paracosm some people are born with superpowers and such, and Beau's superpowers are super strength and speed, while Dev's superpower is super intelligence.

Dev can't keep up with his brother on foot, so he made himself a jetpack to keep up, and makes science weapons for himself to use.

In this paracosm, there are evil robots, pirates, bandits, ninjas, demons, fallen angels, giant spiders, bad guys who kidnap pretty people, any enemy you would find in a video game or anime yeah it's probably here. So, there's always something for Beau and Dev to fight or someone to save from something.

Beau and Dev don't have secret identities since superpowered people are common but they get to have a pretty rad transformation scene activate when they fist bump each other.

Beau fighting style is similar to that of a hack and slack fighting game, Beau mostly use his fists to fight and his speed, he'll also use guns too, but he'll only use swords if he thinks he can pull off a cool move, since not really experience using them that much. Dev made Beau special gloves and boots that make the attack range of his hit larger so its easier to take out hoards of stuff like robots (which happens lot) and big enemies like giant monsters.

His boots are also guns so its like....

Oh, and Beau also makes sure that he always looks cool when fighting just in case someone takes a pic (which happens alot). Unlike Bayonetta, Beau is more playful with his posing rather than sexy.

Dev's wits come in handy when the two come across puzzles, riddles, or finding a way out of traps on their adventures since Beau didn't complete school once his parents passed and mostly focus on raising his siblings and hero training.

Much like Sonic, Beau is very snarky and witty while fighting his enemies (or at least tries to be), he always tries to make a snarky comment or a really cool zinger before finishing off his enemy. Due to his kind of being not the sharpest tool in the shed, it can take a while for him to come up with a good zinger, so it kind of stalls fights, and sometimes it gets to the point where the enemy is just like "Oh my GOD! just KILL ME!", this also annoys and embarrasses Dev too at times.

Beau makes money from bounties and doing odd jobs around, he makes enough for his siblings to live comfortably, but there are times where he'll go hungry because he only has enough for Dev and Carrie to eat. Beau is still a kind of a lower-level hero compare to the other well know ones around.

Dev has also made a rocket ship so they can fight intergalactically on other planets

Carrie in this paracosm is still 4 years old, she has yet to show any signs of having powers, which is pretty normal for her age since people in this world don't show powers until they hit their pre-teen years.

Beau will take Carrie on their adventures if it's safe enough, but if the mission is too dangerous Beau will take her to the nearest daycare or the nearest trustworthy femme person. Beau will try to make the mission or fight end quickly as possible if he left Carrie with a stranger, there's a sigh of relief once he finds her safe, if not (which doesn't happen a lot thankfully), well somebody gonna die and Beau tries to make it up to her by spending the next few days with her, just him and Carrie.

Beau tries to put being a good guardian/older brother before being a hero and tries his best to spend as much time with Carrie and Dev as possible on chiller/lower stakes days.

Beau had never had time to really process the feeling of losing his parents, there are days where he feels down but he never lets it show around his siblings or have it affect his hero work. There are nights where those memories keep him up, sometimes he'll cry but still try to smile thru the tears.

Beau likes to give peps talks to himself in the mirror, and pep talks to Dev, when he's feeling discouraged, although most of the time those pep talks don't really make any sense Dev still appreciate his brother's kind words.

Since Beau saves people, he interacts a lot with damsels in distress, he flirts with them, but usually gets rejected for coming across as too cheesy or cocky. He doesn't really mind it tho, he actually finds it funny, but when a lady actually flirts back he gets really flustered and has to leave immediately. Despite this Beau still tries to give Dev advice on talking to girls.

Beau still smokes and drinks because the stress of having to raise young siblings, dealing with trauma, and being a hero can be alot, but he still makes sure his siblings don't see him and he doesn't get too wasted.

Other than hero stuff, Hero! Beau enjoys reading comics, parkour, skateboarding, break dancing (which he incorporates in his fighting for some really cool finishers), practicing cool poses and phrases, playing video games with his little brother, and watching barbie movies with his little sisters (since Barbie reminds him of his mom).

Oof, I think that's all I got for now....

TL;DL Basically if this version of Beau is Sonic the original Beau is more like Shadow if that makes any sense.

[fuck-you-upmusicbracket]

Sunlight (Hozier)

All the tales the same/Told before and told again/A soul that's born in cold and rain/Knows sunlight, sunlight, sunlight/And at last can grant a name/To a buried and a burning flame/As love and its decisive pain/Oh, my sunlight, sunlight, sunlight

But whose heart would not take flight/Betray the moon as acolyte/On first and fierce affirming sight of/Sunlight, sunlight, sunlight/I had been lost to you, sunlight/And flew like a moth to you, sunlight, oh, sunlight/Oh, your love is sunlight

"I come down with the shivers and start hyperventilating when i hear this song and it makes me want to go outside which is the scariest part"

"I'm not gonna go full infodump here but this song is Peak Vash and Nicholas D. Wolfwood from Trigun-- specifically Nick's feelings towards Vash. Vash's (literal) evil twin brother Knives hired (read: threatened to eradicate the orphanage he kidnapped Nick from as a child if he didn't do what he was told) Nick to act as bodyguard for Vash and guide him to where Knives wants him to go so he can manipulate him for his own gain. Like, he chose the name Knives. This bitch is crazy beyond crazy but this ain't about him. Nick starts out 100% willing to guide Vash like a lamb to slaughter because he HAS to for the orphanage, and this is just some random guy he doesn't know or care about. But then he gets to know Vash, how good of a person he is despite the shit the world (and Knives) has put him through. How he'd rather risk his own life and health than kill another person because he believes he doesn't get to make that choice for people. And despite being someone who'd rather shoot first, pray for them after, Nick starts trying to wound rather than kill just because Vash doesn't like it. It puts them both at risk and he fusses and argues about it and still kills sometimes but he tries anyways. Eventually he decides that he'll do what he can to protect Vash from Knives without provoking him to destroy the orphanage. He ends up caring about him deeply against his own will to the point that his idea of Eden would be to live with Vash and their friends in a peaceful world where none of them have to fight and die. In the manga, Nick's dying request is to see Vash smile again- the genuine smile that he's complimented every time he's seen it. Vash can't give him that, because he knows Nick would see that it was a forced smile. Instead, he just sits with him until he dies. Afterwards, Vash kills willingly for the first time in his entire life (over 150 years. He's not human btw) in order to protect Nick's childhood friend Livio. He wouldn't just do that for just any friend or ally, no, that was out of love. Love so strong he could go against his own mother's teachings that all life matters and people don't get to choose when a life ends, the thing that has kept Vash pacifist all these years, to keep someone that mattered to Nick alive. So while Nick never knew that Vash cared for him the same way he did him, the fact matters that he does."

Praying (Ke$ha)

Cause you brought the flames and you put me through hell/I had to learn how to fight for myself/And we both know all the truth I could tell/I'll just say this is I wish you farewell

"Ke$ha putting all her rage and pain into one song directed at her abuser, while also being a triumphant musical comeback after escaping his control over her career"

[fuck-you-upmusicbracket]

Your Heart is A Muscle the Size Of Your Fist (Ramshackle Glory)

I asked if I could get a ride/He said: “No, you don’t want to follow me/Where it is I’m going”/He backed out of the driveway/That was the last time we saw him/'Cause he drove straight to his parent’s cabin/And put a bullet in his head/Your heart is a muscle the size of your fist/Keep on loving, keep on fighting/And hold on, and hold on/Hold on for your life...

"This song is just a Lot. it feels like a punch to your chest. just one of those folk punk songs that tell a lot of rlly personal stories and connect you to humanity in a rlly painful and visceral and vulnerable way and it rlly compels you to contemplate ur own mortality and just. live your life. and try rlly rlly hard to live and love and learn as much as possible. fuck dude."

Sunlight (Hozier)

All the tales the same/Told before and told again/A soul that's born in cold and rain/Knows sunlight, sunlight, sunlight/And at last can grant a name/To a buried and a burning flame/As love and its decisive pain/Oh, my sunlight, sunlight, sunlight

But whose heart would not take flight/Betray the moon as acolyte/On first and fierce affirming sight of/Sunlight, sunlight, sunlight/I had been lost to you, sunlight/And flew like a moth to you, sunlight, oh, sunlight/Oh, your love is sunlight

"I come down with the shivers and start hyperventilating when i hear this song and it makes me want to go outside which is the scariest part"

"I'm not gonna go full infodump here but this song is Peak Vash and Nicholas D. Wolfwood from Trigun-- specifically Nick's feelings towards Vash. Vash's (literal) evil twin brother Knives hired (read: threatened to eradicate the orphanage he kidnapped Nick from as a child if he didn't do what he was told) Nick to act as bodyguard for Vash and guide him to where Knives wants him to go so he can manipulate him for his own gain. Like, he chose the name Knives. This bitch is crazy beyond crazy but this ain't about him. Nick starts out 100% willing to guide Vash like a lamb to slaughter because he HAS to for the orphanage, and this is just some random guy he doesn't know or care about. But then he gets to know Vash, how good of a person he is despite the shit the world (and Knives) has put him through. How he'd rather risk his own life and health than kill another person because he believes he doesn't get to make that choice for people. And despite being someone who'd rather shoot first, pray for them after, Nick starts trying to wound rather than kill just because Vash doesn't like it. It puts them both at risk and he fusses and argues about it and still kills sometimes but he tries anyways. Eventually he decides that he'll do what he can to protect Vash from Knives without provoking him to destroy the orphanage. He ends up caring about him deeply against his own will to the point that his idea of Eden would be to live with Vash and their friends in a peaceful world where none of them have to fight and die. In the manga, Nick's dying request is to see Vash smile again- the genuine smile that he's complimented every time he's seen it. Vash can't give him that, because he knows Nick would see that it was a forced smile. Instead, he just sits with him until he dies. Afterwards, Vash kills willingly for the first time in his entire life (over 150 years. He's not human btw) in order to protect Nick's childhood friend Livio. He wouldn't just do that for just any friend or ally, no, that was out of love. Love so strong he could go against his own mother's teachings that all life matters and people don't get to choose when a life ends, the thing that has kept Vash pacifist all these years, to keep someone that mattered to Nick alive. So while Nick never knew that Vash cared for him the same way he did him, the fact matters that he does."