#and billy wants to know

[krysmcscience]

I have some questions about karaoke night, Alex Hirsch. Very Important Questions. Which I will happily scream at a poor hapless baby triangle who can have no answers for me, and possibly also does not have object permanence yet.

Follow-up that is I guess suggestive, but let's be real here, Bill's a fucking triangle:

Dude slipped right into his birthday suit, lmao

this is so stupid :D

Anyway, I don't care what anyone says, this brilliant individual knows what's up - Bill is absolutely way more of a monsterfucker than Ford could or ever will be, full stop.

[nakathemoth]

Constantine honest to god thought a child had just been struck by lightning and died by his side

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 102

 Bruce pinched the bridge of his nose, taking a deep breath. In for ten seconds, out for eight. Alright. Okay. “Let me get this straight,” he didn’t motion to the three teens- or not teens even if two apparently looked like they were- but it was a close thing. “You-” 

 Phantom perked up, white hair flickering with what he was pretty sure were stars as they turned away from the window looking out into space. “-are two years old.” The fae-esque being who looked more like a fourteen year old gave a half-distracted nod. Which, for a toddler, they were paying attention pretty well. 

 “You-” Klarion looked up from where he was fiddling with the cuffs that had been on him, cat sprawled on his shoulder now that it was out of the carrier. “-are six?” Another distracted nod, the apparently-child seemingly enamored with the sounds the cuffs made when they clinked together. 

  “And you-” He turned towards Marvel, who shrank back before seemingly steeling themself. “-are in fact ten.” The… well they had thought demigod but apparently all three were some sort of realms-being, which had apparently made Constantine pale and start cursing before stomping out of the Watchtower. Another nod and shaky thumbs up. 

 Alright. Okay. They had in fact let a ten-year old join the league, which wouldn’t have been so bad if they had known. Especially the fact that apparently Marvel was only half-human, which suddenly explained so much about how he didn’t know so many things about a human life. Which-

 “You,” he turned towards Phantom again to make sure he was listening before returning his attention to Marvel. “And you have both lived at least a year in the human realm with human companions, but your-” He turned his gaze towards the ravenette in the center. The six year old apparently. “-experience with the human realm is literally just with the Light.” 

 Yet another distracted nod. Okay. Bruce was tempted to scream in a room for the entire situation that had cropped up from the single action of taking Klarion’s familiar and then the boy himself into custody. Then again, it was honestly a much better thing they had apparently caught this. 

 “Alright,” he sighed, suddenly feeling incredibly exhausted. “To make sure I have all of this correct-” Because it was already a shitshow and the amount of shouting had absolutely spooked the child. To the point he’d- according to Marvel- made what was apparently some sort of very distressed noise that had made both him and Phantom running. Or rather flying and portaling. 

 “-in the realms, people there make friends through fighting,” Bruce pauses to make sure he got that part correct. The origin of this entire misunderstanding with the chaos-lord. Lordling? 

 All three nodded, Klarion losing interest in the cuffs and starting to pet his cat. Familiar. Everyone had referred to it as a familiar and Marvel had appeared utterly horrified that they had taken said familiar away. Somehow he was the one the trio were currently trusting and weren’t doing the same towards any of the other league members. 

 “And you have been trying to make friends with the Jr team, which they have been taking as an attack due to this miscommunication.” Honestly they should have gotten more information, though he couldn’t exactly blame any of the teens, what with everything they were currently dealing with. 

 “... is there any sort of guardian or something you might have, that can be contacted? Or anyone that could help prevent a situation like this from happening again?” All three avoided his eyes, suddenly finding things like the table and walls very interesting. 

 Oh. Hm. This could be a problem.

[doctorsiren]

give this angle another tri

[amoeba-proteus]

~Mandy and Billy~

[nelkcats]

Invocation to the wrong deity

Diana needed help, but it was a burden that fell on her, since the danger was on Themyscira. She wasn't going to bother her companions with a personal problem so she didn't inform the League.

Or at least, she didn't think to ask for help until she realized that she required an experienced mage to perform a summoning. She could ask Zatana for help but she was on a journey, and Constantine was not an option. With a sigh she decided to contact Captain Marvel.

Her partner agreed to help her immediately, and with much reluctance on her mother's part (no one was happy with the Captain's participation but they accepted it) they managed to perform the summoning. Just in time, because one of the "evils" from Pandora's box had landed on their land.

Unfortunately, instead of summoning their old guide "Pandora", someone else appeared. A teenager in a star-spangled cloak looking around excitedly. Of course, no one was happy with such a development.

Except the summoned one, Danny was happy to leave his meeting with the Observants, the excuse of the summoning was always convenient.

[latenightsundayblues]

I imagine their banter and bickering in the process of killing someone would deal greater psychological damage than the torturing itself

[harringroveera]

They’re just silly boys in love your Honor

[to-be-a-dreamer]

Imagine if Marvel has bamboozled us all into thinking we figured out their big plot twist of Teen being Billy Kaplan and then he’s revealed to actually be Nicholas Scratch

[erinwantstowrite]

do we like Captain Marvel or Shazam more for Billy? I haven't caught up on his comics like. at all and i consume the little content that shows up every now and then on my feed

[kidbutcher]

Ughh Ryan feeling especially lonely right now 😭 Becca loved Christmas, she spoiled her little boy with love and affection and warmth. But this is just another Christmas without her, and right now he has nobody. Homelander can't even bother to check in on him, no he has to send some rushed voice-mail message telling him to basically suck it up and do the christmas special- for his sake

Ryan had to spend his favorite holidays alone in a room full of cameras and muppets, completely miserable :( just thinking about his mom and having nobody to really comfort him

In a way, Butcher waaaas spending the holiday with him at the bar, just being proud of him. I wish Ryan knew that at least

[krysmcscience]

The Lamb is malicious in a funny way and the Goat is funny in a malicious way. No, I will not elaborate.

Anyway, everyone give thanks to the Lamb for interrupting what was sure to be a very boring and patronizing PSA from their grouchy cat hubby. Truly, they are doing God's work. Granted, the Lamb canonically is God now, so, uh. Mostly they're just doing their own work.

Speaking of their grouchy cat hubby, yes this is absolutely still Narilamb, Narinder is 100% into his goofy-ass spouse always no matter what and we all know it, he just wasn't expecting his brand new adopted kid to share the same single goofy-ass brain cell as the Lamb. :)

[chaoticallyfluffy]

Ok consider:

A new hero emerges and the Justice League watches him for a while who make sure he’s not a threat. They see this giant clumsy man who moves like he’s not used to his body, smiles goofily every time he saves someone, and is clearly inexperienced with his powers and they’re all just like. Ah. This is a child.

Except they don’t think he’s a ten year old or however old Billy is at the time, no no. Clearly this hero came into existence shortly before his first appearance, just a few months ago. They don’t know how or why but It’s not the weirdest thing they’ve seen so it’s pretty easy to believe.

But they can’t just leave this toddler with the powers of a god to stumble around and potentially hurt someone by accident, nor go down the wrong path and become a villain. So of course they decide to ‘subtly’ guide him without alerting him to the fact they’re onto him.

They introduce themselves but instead of inviting him to the league they pop by every once in a while to ‘subtly’ teach him about responsibility and power, but also about love and humanity. They try to teach him to enjoy life and that he doesn’t have to act like an adult around them, instead encouraging him to enjoy his childhood even if it’s not an ordinary one.

(Too bad the Justice League suck at subtlety.)

Billy is certain they somehow found out he’s a kid before they even met him, probably because of Batman’s freaky know-it-all powers, but he isn’t very worried as they seem nice and don’t treat him like he’s dumb or fragile. They respect him as a hero despite his age so he lets himself act like a kid around them after a while.

When he gets comfortable enough to detransform Billy thinks that’s his identity reveal. The league thinks that he magicked himself a body that’s more of a representation of his true self and fits his developmental age better, possibly as a way to blend in with humans and experience what it’s like to be a normal child. Good for him!

Basically Billy gets a bunch of super powered parents and the Justice League get a newborn man that they think they’re raising from scratch lol

[wolfsbanesparks]

You know, Captain Marvel may have been warned to stay out of politics, but Billy "not threatened by gods" Batson wasn't. I think the little dude would rant about corrupt politicians as Whiz Kid on Whiz Radio and not get punished for it because who's going to tell off a kid? Anything Captain Marvel can't say, Billy will yell into a mic!

Oh for sure!

Billy has opinions and he's going to let people know about them! He was given a microphone and an audience and by the gods he's going to use them! Captain Marvel has to play nice with the local politicians but Billy doesn't! And he has always been more politically aware than most kids his age.

(A certain golden age comic of Billy trying to use Captain Marvel to commit voter fraud because he was too young to vote but was highly invested in local politics comes to mind)

I can see Mr Morris telling him to document evidence and cite his sources when he gets heated just to avoid people suing WHIZ radio for slander and keep up his journalistic intergrity, but the second Billy has the smallest shred of proof, Mr Morris sits back and eagerly listens to Billy tear into whatever corrupt official has caught his eye.

[itissadbutitsmy-artblog]

hey i got really sad about baby world being bmo's wish. thats actually awful. jake. safe. thats what prismo got out of that wish.

i clearly couldnt keep my energy up through the end of this but i still. wanted to. p.ost, it. before fnc tomorrow. :]

[alissssssaka]