Hi Becca! I would literally die for you blog. It’s my go to any time I need some good self care😉. You’re incredibly talented!
But I’ve had this idea bouncing around in my head. It boils down to just Bucky and cock warming. Like the reader is on him begging for more but he is just having way to much fun playing with their clit to start moving. Making them cum on him with out thrusting once.
Just an idea I thought you might like. I love you work, have a great day!!
I'm really glad you've been enjoying my stuff so much!! That's so sweet!💗 and I keep getting told I can get ✨filthier✨ so I'd love to mess with this is little bit
Because I love the thought of Bucky making you start off with a dildo that's just a little bit smaller in size than he is. Maybe one of those dildos with a suction cup on the bottom so it's stuck on a wooden chair.
"Good girl, take it all." He encourages, kneeling between your legs, watching your cunt greedily swallow the toy. It's a sight he doesn't often get to see and he's really not sure why he doesn't make a point of watching it more often.
You whine quietly, feeling the toy bottom out. Your ass makes contact with the cool, varnished wood beneath you and you can't help but roll your hips a little, enjoying the feeling of the tip rubbing against your velvety walls.
"If I wanted you to fuck yourself on that, I'd tell you to. Did I tell you to?" Bucky's voice has a sharp edge that almost knocks you out of your daze.
"N-no... But-" You begin, trying to justify your movement but he cuts you off.
"No. So don't. I want you to keep your cunt stuffed and take what I give you." He watches up at you as he presses your knees apart, keeping his eyes on your face until he can't bare it anymore.
You gasp quietly at the feeling of his hot breath on your exposed, slick sex and there's nothing you can do but whimper at the feeling of his tongue gently grazing your clit.
Fuck, it's good. It's not long before he's licking you like he's starving, lapping and sucking gently on your clit before forcing your legs wider apart to lick your arousal from the base of the toy.
"Bucky, please. Please let me move." You didn't mean to sound so pathetic but with each lick, you get closer and closer to an orgasm you won't be able to stop. An orgasm you've been warned you're not allowed to have.
You're almost surprised he takes pity on you, giving you permission to get off the toy. He removes it from the chair and sits down in it's place, offering his cock as a replacement.
You sit back down as you had earlier with your back to his chest but you can't help but feel amazed at how much better his dick feels. He's slightly bigger and while that's nice, nothing beats the way he throbs inside you and the hot, breathy groans against your ear at the feeling of your body taking all of him.
"Such a good girl." He smirks against your neck, littering your skin with kisses between his soft praises. You feel one of his hands on your chin, gently directing you to look to your right, over in the direction of the full length mirror.
The reflection you're looking at makes your walls flutter involuntarily because fuck, you really are stuffed full of his cock and he's making sure you're not able to fully enjoy it yet.
With one hand still holding your head in place, making sure you keep watching, Bucky's free hand trails down between your legs, flicking and rubbing your clit again.
"Oh f-fuck." You whine, watching Bucky's smirk widen. You can't sit still. You just can't. You want to grind your hips and take what you need and in that moment, his pleasure and all the instructions he's given you come second. You need to get off, consequences be damned.
"Don't even fucking think about it." He warns, delivering one harsh slap to your clit. It's not overly hard but it's enough to shock you. "You know you're not allowed to cum. I want to feel this pretty pussy dripping first. Don't worry though. Once you're wet and messy enough, I'll fuck you stupid on the carpet, right in front of the mirror. Want you to watch yourself cum so hard you forget your own name."
Eddie Munson x F Reader
Warnings: Mention of bad parents, and bad boyfriends. Yeah nothing else really just LOTS of fluff!
Word Count: 1k+
Description: Reader realizes she's in love with Eddie after he ties her shoes for the first time. So she starts making it a habit of walking with her shoe untied for him to tie and he catches on.
A/N: I saw this concept of Eddie stopping to tie Reader's shoes and I just had to make a fic about this because if that ain't love, I don't know what is!! 💕🥺
(P.S I also listened to this song while writing this and the part where he says “thought I could live without romance, until you came to me.” omg that part was so good I love Elvis’s music!!)
If someone had told me I'd end up falling in love with my best friend, Eddie "The Freak" Munson I'd call them crazy, but here I was standing with my arms full of books and Eddie suddenly stopping me, getting down on his knees and tying my shoes.
"Your gonna fall and break a tooth if you keep walking around like this Sweetheart," he said chuckling as you stare at him wide-eyed, mouth gaping a bit.
"No, I'd never fall in love with anyone ever, people disappoint me." I had told Eddie time and time again when he would ask me during our lunch at our "secret table” in the woods. He’d ask me if I had a crush on anyone in the school and he always got the same answer but yet he still seemed to ask at least once a month.
No, I'd never fall in love... But here I was staring at him as he tied my left shoe, then my right, and then looked up at me with those beautiful brown eyes and pearly white smile. And suddenly my heart was beating a thousand miles per hour, with no signs of slowing down. And my hands were getting clammy, the books in my arms threatening to fall but no way in hell was I about to let them fall and hit Eddie's beautiful face.
"You good, (y/n/n)?" he asked, standing up and tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear.
"U..Um, Yeah I'm fine just a bit lost in thought" you replied giving him a small smile, he nods.
"Then shall we get to class?"
"Yup let's go Eds"
Ever since that moment with Eddie a few months ago, I've been falling head over heels for him and I wanted more than anything to be his, but to ask him was to face rejection and I sucked with rejection. Plus I was sure he didn't like me he was always very flirtatious with a lot of people he had been that way even when I first met him two years ago.
But it wasn't gonna stop me from loving him. Almost every couple of days for the last four months Eddie would stop, get down on his knees and tie my shoe never minding or finding it annoying that I always somehow had my shoes untied.
And when he did it, my heart would flutter like a thousand butterflies in an open field. God if only he knew what he did to me. If only he knew how quickly I'd fallen for him, despite never really feeling like this before it felt like I have loved him my whole life. Yes I've had a few boyfriends before but they were just heartbreakers, never staying for long.
But with Eds it was different, He is different than the rest of them. He cares about me like no other, always going out of his way to make sure I was happy and taken care of. Knowing how my home life was and how it wasn't always the best and how cruel my family could be and how low they could make me feel. He always made sure I felt the exact opposite of that.
I don't know why it took me so long to fall in love with him it wasn't like I didn't find him attractive, he’s always been beautiful and I’ve always notice how kind he was despite being see as the complete opposite. Everything about him was inviting so why did it take me this long to realize I love him? I think maybe it was just my guarded heart, but somehow he managed to melt this heart of iron.
And God if he ever found out why my shoes were always untied I swear I'd just pass away right then and there, definitely a good thing he hasn't caught on yet which meant I could continue to do it without any suspicion from him.
Four months ago I had gotten down on my knees in front of (y/n) to tie her shoes so she wouldn't fall, and I gotta admit it was one of the best decisions I had ever made. Because here I was now, walking down the halls and there she was again walking down the halls with her miss-matched socks peeking out and her untied shoes, her eyes glued to the book in her hands. And I swear she was the most beautiful person I’ve ever laid my eyes on.
And This was the four-time in the last week that I'd seen her with untied shoes. Ever since she'd walked around with her shoes untied that day, it had started to be a common occurrence. she'd never been this way before but i was like suddenly she had a longing for face planting and getting hurt.
Eventually, I caught onto her schemes and plans very early on. I had one day overheard her friend Robin talking to Dustin in the hallways, about how she was purposely untying her shoes so I could tie them for her whenever I'd spot her throughout the day. I'll admit It was a bit confusing and I didn't know why she did it, but the girl I've been in love with since the day I met her, wanted me to tie her shoes, there was no way I'd turn that down ever.
"Really sweetheart, again with the untied shoes? How many times do I have to tie your shoes in a week? you’re gonna end up hurting yourself one day." I said smiling at her, she lifts her head up her precious smile making a way onto her face.
Getting down to tie her shoes, I start by taking both of the laces on her left foot tying them and ending with the signature bunny ears, then moving to the right and doing the same on that side just as I always do whenever I tie her shoes.
"It's almost like you want me to tie your shoes for you, it's almost like" I pause for a second chuckling.
"Like you're purposely doing this just so I can tie them." I said looking at her as she gazed back down at me, and I could see a little panic in her alluring eyes and small blush creeping onto her face, as she tried to stay calm knowing she's been caught in her act.
"Wh-why would you think that," she asks stuttering a bit, I stand up placing an arm over her shoulder as the halls start to clear out. Her and I among the few still standing around.
I lean down and get close to her ear, breathing on it a bit, as she shivers.
"Well because I might have overheard so and so talking to another so and so about how your purposely untying them, so little old me could tie them for you." I smirk at her, as her body goes tense underneath me, as she pulls away from my arm facing me now, eyes wide and mouth open.
"Who told you that?!" she asks.
"Munson, (y/l/n), Get to class now!" Our heads turn as we hear Mrs. Elgreen yell at us.
“Stop standing around, go now!” She yells again. As (y/n) just stands there waiting for a response from me.
"Oh, I’m sorry sweetheart, but I gotta get to class really don’t wanna fail again, and I think you should go to really don’t want you failing either." I said a smug look on my face, as I quickly peck her cheek walking off to my class. I looked back at her shocked expression and chuckled a bit, God that girl was gonna be the death of me.
A/N: Hey guys! this is my first Eddie Munson fic I hope ya'll liked it.
Also feedback is greatly encouraged and I hope you guys will start requesting things soon, because I'm dying to write! Please comment, like and reblog, i’d really appreciated it!! :)
(Also this isn’t my gif it’s by @metalheadmunson go follow them there great!! Thank you sooo much for this gif, it’s so precious!!)
🥺 how abouttt "peter and danny having late night talks bc ohmigodtheywereroommates"
i mean they are really cute- 🐥
and I LOVE YOUR WORKS!!! really, they make me feel so much emotions at the same time, idk how do you do that skdskdjs
Heya! Thanks for the request. I'm so happy to hear you like my lil stories. I don't recognize your username, did you recently change it?
Idk why I always put them in college instead of working a dead end job or something? Idk.
The time on the stove said 1:27, an unfortunate time of morning when sleep was losing the battle against the thoughts racing through Danny's mind. Nevermind that he had class at 8am, his mind raced with scenarios and what-ifs, replaying past battles and mistakes as an extra layer to his spiraling anxiety. He was careful to not make a sound as he searched through the kitchen for an easy snack; his two roommates were sleeping down the hall, both had their own fair share of sleepless nights and Danny wasn't desperate enough for company to ruin one of their good nights.
As he settled on an orange, one of the few healthy options to be found, the window to the attached dining room slowly slid open. Without any fanfare, Peter ducked through the small opening, shutting the window behind him before letting in too much of the cold December air.
"Heya," Peter greeted sheepishly as he pulled off his Spider-Man mask. "So, I know I said I'd rest for another week, but…"
Danny shook his head. They were lucky he lasted on the sidelines as long as he did, and Danny wondered just how many times he snuck out without Luke or himself noticing. Still, he needed to give his body- and mind- time to heal. And he absolutely shouldn't be going out alone. With a grin to disguise his worry, Danny asked, "Your bedroom window jammed again?"
Peter shrugged not looking Danny's way as he too began to look for a snack. "It's like a one in six chance. Of course, it would betray me tonight." He paused and sheepishly looked over to Danny, "Sorry if I made you worry. I swear, I just went around the block a few times. I didn't mean for you to lose sleep over me."
While his first instinct was to lean into Peter's guilt, Danny opted for the truth. As he meticulously peeled his orange he calmly said, "I honestly thought you were sleeping. Next time, let me know and I'll come with you."
"Thanks…" Peter thrummbed his fingers against the wood cabinet door, staring blankly at the contents within. "We really need to go grocery shopping."
Danny chuckled at the comment. "Perhaps we can do so tomorrow after classes? This time we should make a list."
Peter hummed, a smile tugging at his lips. "Yeah, a list would be a good start."
"Want half of my orange?" Danny held it between them.
"Yeah… thanks." Peter slowly reached for it, suddenly looking incredibly tired as his evening's activities caught up with him. His fingers brushed against Danny's, lingering for longer than necessary. Out of sheer exhaustion - or something else? Danny didn't have the heart to explore the possibilities.
"You seem absolutely tired, my friend. Please get some rest once you've finished your snack."
"What about you?" Peter popped a slice of the orange into his mouth to punctuate his question.
"Me?" Danny leaned against the small kitchen counter.
"Mhmm. If you weren't up because of me, then what's up? You don't exactly look bright eyed and bushy tailed yourself."
"Just… having trouble sleeping. Nothing a snack and some meditation can't fix." He forced a carefree smile.
"I'm here if you ever want to talk."
They ate in silence before Peter excused himself to his room for the night. One day, Danny would take him up on his offer to talk. But not tonight. Not tonight.
Thanks for reading!
(Don't Let This Be) Just Another Christmas - my CSSS2021 gift
hey, @their-seafaring-ways...i'm your secret santa! @cssecretsanta2020
thank you for your confidence in me 🥺 i hope this is as close to perfect as it can be!
i'd like to think we did okay as far as the asking questions and answering them for a couple of first timers, eh?
originally i was kinda thinking about something completely different, and that was going to be wAy more painful and i may still write it, but once this idea came to me i wanted to get it written first because it's more feel-good and fluffy for Christmas.
here's yet another best-friends-to-lovers, they-don't-realize-they're-in-love-with-each-other-because-they're-Idiots™ fic.
it may not encapsulate everything i'd hoped right now, because i wanted to get the main feels in here, but i also wanted to get it posted because i am so bad with deadlines and i knew if i tried getting everything in it right away it would not make it. so i will continue it with hopefully a chapter for each activity our ship completes—more snowy Christmas fluff to come!!! i also want to do an addition with emma's perspective on their meeting and the beginning of their friendship. and if there's any other aspect that i didn't add or i only grazed over that you'd like me to write more on, just let me know, i'll happily do it.
i will say i about made myself cry at one point reading over this lol. i really hope you love it :)
summary: Killian comes back from an assignment and isn't sure how long he has before he has to go for another. He uses the time to help his best friend Emma fulfill her Christmas bucket list of things she never got to do as a child, being passed around foster homes. He's been in love with her since he met her, and though it took some time for her to warm up to him, she loves him too—but neither of them knows about the other's feelings because they're certified idiots. They know they hate being apart for so long, so Killian decides to do something about it.
if ao3 floats your boat :)
story under the cut.
He remembers the moment he met her like it was yesterday.
The principal guides him into the classroom. He’s never been a shy kid, but he is nervous about his first day here—not only is he new to this school, he’s new to the country entirely, having moved only a few days ago.
His eyes scan the room as the principal introduces him—“This is Killian Jones, everyone.”—and he does a little wave, but he falters when he sees her sitting there, an unimpressed expression on her face, with an eyebrow raised for emphasis. He notices the only empty desk in the classroom, save for a few in the very back, is right next to hers.
It’s the teacher’s voice that brings him back to reality: “Welcome, Killian. Why don’t you have a seat next to Emma?”
His heart pounds when he hears her name—Emma. It suits her, he thinks. He sees her roll her eyes, as if she should have been expecting that to happen.
When he sits down, he notices that her hair falls forward, blocking her face, as she works, and he wonders what her story is. He hasn’t said a word to her and he can tell she closes herself off with walls a mile high, and he knows there must be a reason. He realizes he wants to know that reason, almost more than he’s ever wanted anything—but only almost. Losing your mother and being abandoned by your father all in one fell swoop will do that to you. Still, he wants to know her. He wants to be there for her through whatever hardship she’s been dealt by life. If only she’d look up for a second.
She rushes off after class, but he manages to catch up to her at the end of the school day. He calls out to her and she stops and turns around, which surprises him a bit, but he’s not complaining. He feels his smile fall a little as he realizes he has no idea what to say—he may only be 16, but never has he not known what to say to someone. He settles on asking her if she knows any good places around to get food, since he’s just moved and hasn’t had much time to explore yet, and she surprises him by offering to show him her favorite diner, however reluctant she appears to be.
Over the course of a few months, he gets to know her, Emma Swan. He finally gets that look into her past one night on the balcony of the room she can finally call her own, permanently: she’s been in and out of foster homes since birth—her first family kept her for a few years, but sent her back when they had a baby of their own, and she’s bounced around different states until she got to Storybrooke, Maine, last year. She was reluctant to let people in as she’d been expecting the other shoe to drop the whole time, but yesterday, Ruth Nolan and her son David surprised her with the adoption papers.
Killian had known Emma had lived her life as a foster child; she had told him as much. what he didn’t know was the extent of it, and his heart ached as she told him her story. When she finished, he pulled her in for a hug, and she held on to him so tightly he couldn’t breathe for a moment.
He shakes himself out of the memory but can't believe it’s been almost 15 years since he met Emma. And now he’s on his way back to her for the first time in nearly a year.
The pounding on her door at 8:15 in the morning does not help Emma's mood. She’s not expecting anyone, especially this early. She's only preparing her first cup of coffee for the day before doing some research on her newest skip, so she hopes that if she ignores it, it’ll go away.
Grumbling to herself, she stomps over to the door. She probably should have looked through the peephole first, but her morning brain is too foggy to think about that as she flings the door open only to see her best friend standing there. Clearly she can’t think properly, because she’s gaping at him like a fish until he speaks.
“Well, Swan, are you going to keep staring or might I come in?”
That sets her brain into motion. She attacks him with the biggest bear hug she’s sure he’s ever received. She hears the oof of the air leaving him in a rush and the thud of his suitcase when he drops it, but she doesn’t care.
“You’re back,” she almost-whispers on a small laugh, still clinging to him.
“Aye,” Killian gets out, and she can hear the smile in his voice, “and I’d like to breathe soon.”
“Sorry,” she says as she takes a step back from him—not that she wants to. In fact, if she got her way, she’d never let him go.
He shakes his head at her fondly as he picks up his bag, and she moves to make room in the doorway for him to enter her apartment. She follows him in, closes the door behind them, and goes back to finish preparing her coffee.
“How long are you back this time?” She asks once she’s taken a few sips.
“I’m not sure at the moment, but I know it’ll be soon,” he responds sadly. “They said they’d give me a call once they got an update on the situation.”
She opens the door and he’s never been happier to see her. He can’t wait to tell her.
“Hey, what are you doing here?” She asks. Normally, he’d tease her about her non-greeting, but he’s too excited. He runs the few steps to her, wrapping her in a hug and spinning her around in the air. “Whoa, hey, what’s gotten into you?” She laughs. He loves her laugh.
He sets her down and sheepishly apologizes. “Sorry, love, it’s just I got the best news today, and I had to tell you first. They’ve accepted me.”
“Wait, what?” She asks, though more out of disbelief than confusion.
“The agency I told you about?” She nods. “They’ve accepted my application and the whole interview process I had to go through. They want me on their team.”
A bright smile lights up her face. He loves her smile too. “Killian, that’s amazing! How exactly will the job work?”
He fills her in on the intricacies and technicalities of being a spy at a private agency. While he can tell she’s excited for him, he can also tell she’s scared—for him, for herself, for their friendship. She doesn’t voice her thoughts, though, and he doesn’t want to push.
He knows she worries that their friendship won’t make it through his comings and goings, as they’ll be forced to have no contact during the time he’s on assignments. Even after all these years, she still half-expects everyone in her life to leave her. He doesn’t fault her, though; in fact, he understands her. He may not have lived exactly the same way she has, but he understands that her time bouncing around from place to place in the foster system has taken its toll on her, and that mindset takes a long time to rewire. Even if she’s never able to fully believe that not everything in her life will change at the drop of a hat, he’s not planning on going anywhere. He’ll prove to her every day that people can stay, that people do want to stay. He knows right then and there that he will make it a point to ensure he always comes back to her.
Each time he finishes an assignment, he goes to her first, without fail.
Killian watches her face fall, though she tries to hide it.
“What are you going to do in the time you’re here, then?” Emma asks, trying to sound casual. “I’m sure the guys would love to see you.”
“I’ll say hi to them at some point,” he responds, almost dismissively. “But,” he begins rummaging through his bag, “I did make a list of some things I wanted to do with you.” He pulls out a paper and hands it to her, and when she looks at him with confusion, he smiles and nods in encouragement. She looks at the paper and reads:
- playing in the snow in various ways—having a snowball fight, building a snowman, making snow angels, going sledding
- ice skating
- baking cookies
- getting a tree and decorating for Christmas
- getting hot chocolate and walking around to see lights displays
“Wait,” she starts. “Are these…?”
“Things you’ve told me over time you never got to do as a child. It may not be the same, but I’d like to offer you the chance to complete some of these.”
“Or all of them?”
He laughs a little at that. “Whatever floats your boat, love.”
“Thank you, Killian,” she says as she hugs him, this time allowing him to mirror the action.
“Of course, Swan.”
They end up with two weeks. Two weeks he gets to watch Emma let loose and have fun. Two weeks he gets to watch her whole face light up with each new Christmas activity they do.
He lets her win most of their snowball fights. But only most. Hey, he has to win one here and there, doesn’t he?
They build the snowman in equal measure, and he lets her pick what to use to dress it.
They both flop onto the snow-covered ground together and try making snow angels until their entire backs freeze. None of them are perfect, but some just have the oddest blob-like shape to them.
She sits in front of him on the two-person sled, and he can’t stop himself from imagining them like this, but in a number of different, indoor scenarios—but only for a moment.
He watches her falter on the ice before gaining her balance and going back and forth between wobbling over and standing up straight. He eventually offers his hand, which she gladly takes, and he helps her until she’s confident she can do it on her own. And then he laughs and checks on her when she promptly falls over.
He laughs when she gets flour all over herself and nearly falls over with the laughter when she throws a bunch at him. The cookies come out perfectly, though, and he gets to spend the time with his Swan, so who is he to complain?
He takes her to a farm to pick out a real tree for her apartment and they take their time decorating—the tree and the whole apartment. She teases him about “going all Mary Margaret” with the decorating, but he shrugs it off. “Anything to see you this happy,” he tells her, and he means every word.
He thinks they have a moment at the end of the night, while they’re walking around the Storybrooke neighborhoods, looking at the last few houses’ lights displays, and have finished their hot chocolate. He doesn’t push, he never would, and sees her fear shutter into place at the last second. He can tell she tries not to let it show, but she’s always been an open book to him. So he smiles and puts an arm around her shoulders, and while he wishes with everything in him he could banish that fear, he lets her lead.
And only a few days after that, Emma opens the door to a disheveled and breathless Killian, who’s using the wall for balance and looks like he’s just run a mile to get here, and knows before he says a word why he’s here. She feels her eyes begin to sting but blinks it back.
“They called,” he says once he’s caught his breath.
“How long?” She asks, hoping he doesn’t notice how the news breaks her a little.
Of course, he sees right through her, and she hates how the sadness permeates his too-blue eyes.
“They don’t know,” he sighs.
She wraps her arms around his waist as if she can possibly keep him there.
“I don’t want you to go,” she says, and she hates how pathetic she feels.
“I know,” he consoles, and he returns the hug. “But I have to. I’ll be alright, you know that.”
“Yeah, but what if something happens to you? What if—”
“Emma,” he interrupts, knowing she’ll only continue down the rabbit hole, “how many times have I told you?” He cups her face in his hands, though she doesn’t let go of him, before continuing, “I’m a survivor. I’ll be back. I always am.”
Even as she nods slightly, he sees a tear fall. He leans down and presses a kiss to her forehead before hugging her again. Eventually, they have to let go of each other so he can leave.
“I’ll see you when I get back, yeah?”
He ends up gone for three and a half months. For three and a half months, Emma sits in Storybrooke, miserable and feeling like there’s nothing she can do in the small town she’s come to love. Nothing seems to make sense without him.
She sends him texts about her days sometimes, even though she knows he won’t get them until he returns to his agency’s headquarters—it would be too big a risk, both to himself and others, to have his personal phone on him while on a mission, so he has to leave it behind and use an agency-assigned burner.
On one particularly upsetting day, she texts him a small truth: “I miss you.”
She hears his unmistakable knocking over a week later. She greets him the same way she did the last time she opened the door to him like this: a bear hug and a “You’re back.”
“Aye. And Emma, there’s something you should know.” She pulls back and looks at him in confusion, fear seeping in.
“This was the last assignment I’ll be on.”
“For how long?” She asks, doubting he means what she so desperately wants him to mean.
He smiles at her as though he can’t believe she’s asking that and answers, “Forever. This was the last one.”
“But why? You love your job.”
He shrugs. “I liked the travel and the catching bad guys, yes, but I’ve found myself in one too many dangerous situations which could’ve ended much worse than they did, and I’ve wondered what might happen if something happened to me. I’ve asked myself if it’s worth it to keep risking myself like that when there is so much more that I want. And when it comes down to it, the answer is no. I can find something safer to do, something more local.” His eyes are intense as he speaks. “I liked that job well enough, sure, but what I love…is this town. The traditions we’ve all made here. And what I love most of all,” his voice has dropped to nearly a whisper; he’d stepped closer to her as he spoke, and they now stood inches from each other. His eyes find her lips for just a moment before they’re back on hers, and her breath catches in her throat as she hopes beyond all hope for what he’ll say next—
“Is you.” It’s barely above a whisper, the way he breathes it out. “I hate leaving you, I hate being apart from you.” His voice breaks like he’s been torturing himself with this for years—and maybe he has, she realizes. “I can’t bear to do it for extended periods of time anymore. I don’t know how I ever did. It was high time for a change.” She can’t quite believe her ears. He loves her.
“Wait, so you…you traded your entire career…to be with me?”
He swallows and a small smile appears on his face before he answers, “Aye.”
She all but attacks him once her head stops spinning, kissing him like there’s no tomorrow, and he doesn’t take long to reciprocate.
“That was…” he breathes out once they break apart, shaking his head slightly like he can’t believe it just happened.
“I love you, too,” she rushes to say.
He pulls back a little with a somewhat incredulous look on his face. “I might’ve gathered, based on that,” he says, drawing a chuckle from both of them.
They stand there staring at each other for a moment, but when she pulls him inside the apartment this time, they don’t leave for a few days. It’s unnecessary and they’d much rather spend time with each other. And spend time with each other they do. In every possible meaning of the phrase.
no YOU’RE the sweetest! it makes me so happy that you like ibiza so much. it just makes me feel… warm & fuzzy.. y’know? i’m doing good btw hehe. ANYWAY….. onto some dark & twisted ibiza family things <3 i haven’t fleshed out the mom and dad a whole lot since they’re not really that important to the story i have in my head but anyways.. ibiza’s mom unfortunately passed away when ibiza was young which left her with her dad who honestly wasn’t around much when the mom was alive. her dad wasn’t the best with money. by that, i mean he was broke as hell & in debt with some not so great people. he ended up taking ibiza out of the house her mom & her used to live in since he didn’t have enough money to afford it. they would live on the streets for a few weeks before her dad decided to start leaving her at orphanages while he went out to get money. honestly, he figured that she would be able to sleep in an actual bed & eat better food than what she would eat on the streets. he would leave her at one orphanage for like two weeks before coming to pick her up, spend some time with her & then drop her off at another orphanage for another two weeks. unfortunately, his debt caught up with him & he was murdered by the people he owed money to. originally, i made the dad like sell ibiza to the organization that made her an assassin (i need a name for it btw & would love to know if you have any ideas) to get out of his debt but i decided against that bc that felt…. wrong somehow. this is so long so i’ll stop there but YEAH… i’ll get into like the lies ibiza was told about her family & her name some other time! i love you SO MUCH bye bye
BLAHHHH sorry for not getting to this immediately, i had class in the evening, ended up eating dinner in my friend's room, and then had some hw to do... but i'm here now! and ready to discuss!!!
what i really love about this is the fact that: even though ibiza's dad is shitty, he's not necessarily abusive. i feel like there are so many narratives that choose to present the dad as a deadbeat who doesn't provide for his kids, or will even have him do horrible stuff to them... but this not only avoids that but also makes the whole thing a lot more bittersweet, too???
like, he doesn't really.... WANT to be a parent, but after losing her mom, he also can't bear the thought of his daughter having to fend for herself or suffer... so despite the debt he's in, ibiza's dad loves her enough to both TRY and take care of her, but also risk putting her in orphanages because he knows that's what's best???
PLUS................... ok hold on, plus, like....... the whole idea that ibiza finally trusts/gets to know her dad and waits for him to come back for her but he never ends up showing up BUT SHE DOESN'T KNOW WHY (possibly, if u decide) makes me SCREAM.... like you mention how she gets lied to and stuff about her history later in life and this just makes that WORSE bc she (again, if i am assuming Correctly) obvs doesn't realize (or want to realize) the reason he wasn't coming WASN'T bc he left her or didnt love her but bc he COULDN'T ........ WWAHASDAKSFHJASJDK....
like, thinking about baby ibiza all alone waiting... growing up to be bitter about it, and then healing when she learns the truth..... fjdkl;lasdjknfll,asl AHHHHHHH....
what a fantastic storytelling choice tbh and...... wowie zowie overall. even if it does end up changing (bc i love switching around the story) just the angst + storytelling potential here, i love (and am sad because of) it...😭😭😭
ALSO i'd love to help name the organization if ur willing to give me more details abt it... my go to for stuff like that are usually acronyms LOL🥺👉🏻👈🏻
either way tho, i'm super excited to continue this hearing abt the lies she was told and her name, eventually. i remember you mentioned them once to me and i was honestly so touched u wanted my input that i wasn't able to repsond LOOL </3 smh me.
BUT YES, OF COURSE i love ibiza! it's hard not to... esp since this is like a little tv show for me that i'm able to get updates on the production of🥰
anyway, now it's my turn to stop myself from blahing on, but i love YEW too and i'm really happy to hear ur doing good!!!
i had a rly similar experience w/ an older guy at 14🥺💞 i’m so sorry. all that sounds familiar, but for me going no contact with him was the right thing to do. if you feel ok to share,, what was the emotional abuse like?
i'm so sorry that we've both been through this.
some further venting and stuff below:
sometimes i still struggle to feel like im allowed to call it emotional abuse, especially since i really didn't recognise any of it as genuinely harmful at the time. it was just a lot of little things that he'd play off as funny and quirky about our dynamic, like the fact that i was the only one in our friend group who had never had an argument with him or left the group chat. when he disagreed with someone else it was always really messy and horrible and so i just never disagreed with him and i think he liked that about me, how much i was willing to twist myself to get along with him. on the surface it was really funny and cute how our dynamic seemed to fit, since i was always
it was only really earlier this year when i was really severely struggling with my mental health that i realised how much talking to him about my problems made me feel worse since he had this way of dismissing and minimising every issue i would talk about, but he'd play it off as him trying to comfort me and thinking that was what was good for me, even after i told him repeatedly that it just made me more upset when he told me my problems didn't matter. he'd say stuff like 'i'm sorry that talking to me is such a burden for you. why are you even friends with me if i'm clearly such a struggle for you.' when i'd try and express a boundary, very classic shit lmao.
and i guess on a wider level, probably not even very intentionally, he just had this way of making me second guess my own thoughts. i remember one of the few fights we had before this year was after i was really upset with the results of a drama competition i was in and i was complaining about some of the systemic and class-related issues in my area and how the resources of the school that won were directly related to their win. he basically just started belittling me and telling me that i was wrong about this and everything i did and maybe i just wasn't as good as i thought i was and i was just lying to myself about other factors to feel better. even when i explain this whole thing to other people i get really paranoid and feel like people will agree with him and think I'm stupid and full of myself and like. the way that he said all of that really fucked me up and kind of set me back a lot mentally since I've struggled really badly with my self-esteem and imposter syndrome for a really long time and he KNEW all of that and still said these really horrible things that he knew would send me into tailspin of self-hatred.
also idk if it really counts since like,,, it was good for me in the end even if the way he approached it was dodgy but he basically got me to break up with my partner when i was 17 in a way that i now feel a little iffy about, since he was the only person i really talked to about it and he sort of goaded me into doing it when i was having second thoughts.
it definitely wasn't very good of me either but once after a fight we had (where we were both in the wrong) i was feeling really upset with the way he handled conflicts and i was desperate for some feeling of connection with someone who KNEW him and his emotions in the same way i did and i requested his ex on Instagram and i didn't even message her or do anything but bc he stalked her religiously he saw that she had accepted and that i followed her now and he basically just went off at me accusing me of trying to conspire with her to ruin his life and telling me i was stupid for thinking she would agree with me and telling me i was horrible and needed mental help (i mean i did but not in the way that he meant it lol) etc etc etc. like it wasn't like i was 100% in the right because the argument that we had i got far too invested bc of some of the personal shit i was going through at the time but like. it was just really really horrible.
that's just some of the stuff ive been thinking about i guess anon, tbh it has been really helpful to type this all out because as i read it back I'm like wow. if this were someone else's story id be like holy shit that's awful I'm so sorry. and that rlly helps me remember that I'm not insane or making things up or just being dramatic. and even if his version of things is different from mine, what remains is the fact that he hurt me really badly over a period of years. it feels like a self-fulfilling prophecy almost, like he made me promise at one point that i wouldn't stop talking to him once i started uni and got a whole new life with new friends and stuff like his ex did which. is p much exactly what happened this year lol. anyways im thriving as much as can be reasonably expected in the current climate and my life is genuinely a lot better without the constant stress of trying to keep up a friendship with him,,