#and given that the world isn't looking to getting any better (it's just getting worse and worse) .. yeah

[sharlmbracta]

ok depression warning cw depression or something but am i the only one who feels like the world will die out by the time i become 30 or before that

[shadykazama]

Sun Wukong/The destined one (mostly relationship) headcanons!

The people have spoken and the people crave monkey business. So let's get down to it!

❤

Post journey Wukong is a wiser, stronger monkey, but don't let him fool you he's still a trickster at heart.

When you first meet, he has you refer to him as 'Great Sage'.

Earning the right to say his given name isn't so much a big moment as it is just him beginning to care for you. You slip up, whether it be because you were sick or injured or just not thinking, and he doesn't correct you. In fact he kind of likes it.

He doesn't make a big deal out of it, but if you watch closely you can see his tail twitch and his eyes lost in thought.

One character flaw you'll have to deal with, even when you're just friends, is Wukong thinks he knows what's best. He's old and wisened and POWERFUL; if he thinks he knows something will be best for you, he'll do it without so much as telling you.

Credit to Hanibalistic! Their one shot about Wukong and stealing an immortal peach for a mortal reader was perfect and exactly how I think he'd act! That impulsive, "I care about this person and will do what I think is best for them regardless of the consequences or their opinion" is very... him.

Hey, we all have our flaws. (Just don't tell him that.)

On the positive side, he wouldn't let a scratch befall you. At some point you'll stop instinctually defending yourself because of how safe you feel with him. Which is heavily ironic considering how often he himself will put you in dangerous situations just to pull a prank.

But besides your poor heart from getting scared so often, you have nothing to worry about. Wukong won't leave room for even one mistake to slip by him.

Expect him to never call you by your name, almost ever. He chronically tends to call people by titles or nicknames. From calling the tang monk, master, or how he'd call Bajie 'idiot' for most of the book- just expect something. He'd only refer to you by name if he were really serious.

Something I personally find really funny that isn't represented in many medias with him is that he's OLD. He's old as hell and he knows it. In the book he'll often refer to basically everyone as 'nephew' or 'little brother' which is oddly endearing and also really funny.

I feel as though most people don't utilize how heavy he is- even in movies and stuff. His staff is like thousands of pounds! You aren't moving him unless he wants you to. God forbid you end up cuddling. Even while resting I never think he'd put his full weight on you, but you'd definitely be stuck.

Will never refuse to help you, but will tease you endlessly for needing it. "Helpless little thing aren't you?"

His love language is gift giving and acts of service.

He's impulsive with words, but look at how he treats you and you'll see how he cares.

Considering his connections, expect to have the world at your fingertips. He'll never leave you wanting, you'll always be satisfied. There is no gift beyond his reach. Just be careful what you ask for, because he WILL get it one way or another.

He is a king, a leader- it's basically second nature to be serviced, and that's why it's so important how he acts toward you. For you, he stays vigilant, ready to catch you if you fall or feed you when you're hungry. For you, he'll carry you in his arms if you're tired. For you he'd put himself in servitude.

Monkeys also show affection to one another by grabbing at each other for attention, and grooming one another's hair.

I don't think he'd have any trouble getting your attention, he's very vocal! So he'd focus more on your hair. Don't be surprised if he randomly starts combing through with his fingers or just playing with it. It's calming for him, and another form of affection.

You've changed him for the better... And for the worse. He happier, more content and occupied (which is good for everyone). BUT, should you ever disappear or get stolen from him he would surely devastate heaven and earth to get you back. The last thing anyone needs is another, more wrathful, Wukong rampage.

Expect to get shown off at every convenience! You're his king/queen and he'll make sure everyone knows it.

You have the BIGGEST wedding. And I think the best part would've been the Chuangmen, which is a wedding game tradition, usually meant for the groom to prove his loyalty, devotion, and desire to marry the bride by completing tests made by her bridesmaids. There are a ton of really interesting Chinese wedding traditions that I would recommend reading about, but with the sheer power of Wukong, these challenges in particular could've been absolutely ridiculous!

Wukong isn't jealous, no that would be ridiculous, he has nothing to fear. That by no means doesn't mean that he doesn't get offended on your behalf. He's gotten upset at not being greeted properly, there's no way in HELL he doesn't get pissed if someone were to flirt with you. They're lucky if all he does is kill them.

Feel free to make fun of him for not being able to swim. He'll absolutely make you regret it, but do it anyway it'll be funny.

Am I the only one that thinks he'd be great with kids? 🤚

Like COME ON- the dude probably helps take care of the baby monkeys on his mountain. He tells them cool stories to get them riled up. Will lay down and let them play with his hair while you read or sing to him.

Give this man kids I dare you.

That's a topic for a different post 😌

Likes kissing you on the top of the head, will also lay his forehead against yours just to be close to you.

These two designs I really like for him! Y'all let me know in the comments which version is your favorite <3

💙

The destined one may look like Wukong, but they're certainly different in... most areas.

Being selectively mute makes things a good share more difficult to communicate with him than Wukong, but it has it's charms.

You'd just been... tagging along with him. He didn't mind, unlike the wolves and undead he'd been beating through, you proved no threat to him.

He figured you would just leave on your own- or die. But by some miracle even he didn't understand, you stuck by him through rain and dust storms alike. By the time you made it to the New West he felt obligated to keep you around.

For the first time since you started following him, you were actually in danger. And to both of your surprises, he dropped what he was doing to protect you.

Don't bother asking him why. Whether you do, or simply tell him thank you, he'll just wave you off. But you notice him walking closer to you than normal after that. No longer were you left to catch up with him while he sprinted off; he'd keep stride with you now, glancing at you every now and then.

He CAN talk, and he probably surprises you the first time he does. It's not even for something important. It's just one fateful night where you happen to decide to mess with his hair. You'd pull away after a moment and he'd rumble out a little, "Don't stop."

Now that you KNOW he can talk, it's even more annoying when he refuses to answer you.

He finds it amusing when you get frustrated with him about it. He can't help it. The whole time you're grumbling or ranting at him, he's just staring at you with his stoic face... thinking about how cute you are.

Feel free to give him a name. Not like he'll argue with whatever you pick-

But really, please call him something other than "the destined one". He'd never really needed a name before, but he'd treasure whatever you decide to call him.

He probably has a nickname for you too, he just only says it in his head...

Will click his tongue at you to get your attention. (Absolutely does the 'tsk tsk tsk' thing people do to call their cats)

Speaking of getting your attention- ^ remember how monkeys show affection by just kind of grabbing each other and squeezing and pressing their head against each other?

Yeeeeah. He's a touchy monkey. He won't ask for affection, so he kind of just does it himself. Will rub his head on you, not unlike how cats or rabbits do to mark things they like. Except he's just doing it to be affectionate.

Gets cuteness aggression and WILL just grab you.

If it wasn't obvious, his love languages are physical touch and quality time.

Doesn't need help putting armor on, but if you want to help he won't stop you. (The closeness makes his heart beat fast)

If you were ever both in a bad spot- being threatened and not in a place to put up a good fight, he'd cover your body with his and bare his fangs at whatever was trying to hurt you guys to intimidate it. (It probably wouldn't work- but it's an instinctual response.)

If your feet got cold in the snow in the New West he'd pick you up and let you rest on his back for awhile.

Likes when you rely on him like that, it makes him feel stronger. And besides it just "being his destiny", knowing you'll get hurt if he loses helps him focus during fights.

Terribly jealous individual.

The glare he would give someone is straight up deadly. Watch out for how his tail flicks around when he's irritated too 🤭.

Absolutely adores the sound of your voice, it could bring him out of a coma fr.

Doesn't mind being little or big spoon, he just likes cuddling. Wraps his tail around you when you do.

Always always makes sure you eat before he does, even though he's the one doing all the fighting.

Will let you win play fights (most of the time).

Hearing him laugh is the cutest thing ever I swear- It probably took you off guard the first time you manage it.

Doesn't know how to take compliments.

Probably short circuited the first time you complimented his appearance.

Very gentle, slow kisser. Likes having you in his lap, but will grab cheeky kisses every now and then too. Will tilt your chin up when you kiss, every time.

Art by @marcu-bug

[kikyoupdates]

Otherworldly Attraction | yandere!jjk x reader jujutsu kaisen, yandere, reverse harem, isekai, f!reader

You don't know how or why, but you've been isekai'd into the world of Jujutsu Kaisen. Although your first instinct is to stay away from the plot, you've been blessed with an abnormal amount of cursed energy, and for better or worse, you find yourself sucked into the storyline. You decide that you may as well use your newfound powers for the greater good, and if you're lucky, you might succeed in rewriting some of the characters' fates. But it turns out that your presence in this world is an even bigger deal than you first thought, and soon, everyone wants to make you theirs.

also available on Ao3!

Leave Your Mark | bnha x reader my hero academia, reverse harem, isekai, f!reader

You didn’t accomplish anything in your previous life. Looking back on it, you feel nothing but regret, and you yearn for the chance to do things differently. As it turns out, your wish is answered, and you are reborn into your favorite fictional world. This time, you resolve to make a change, and you have the means to do it. You won’t be content with just sitting on the sidelines and letting life pass you by. You will live boldly and vibrantly, as if every moment is your last.

also available on Ao3!

Heartbreaker | bnha x reader my hero academia, reverse harem, isekai, f!reader

You awaken one day with virtually no memories. The only thing guiding you is some strange system that likes to dictate your every move, and for some reason, it insists that you make certain people fall in love with you. Desperate for answers, you decide to go along with its demands. After all, how hard can it be?

also available on Ao3 and Wattpad!

Made to Destroy | bnha x op!reader my hero academia, reverse harem, over powered reader, f!reader

You are the product of a series of twisted experiments, an anomaly that shouldn’t have ever existed in the first place. Thankfully, you are taken into the arms of a hero and given a new purpose in life. But as you soon discover, it isn’t easy to deny your true nature, especially when you were made to destroy.

also available on Ao3 and Wattpad!

Bloodthirst | bnha x vampire!reader my hero academia, reverse harem, vampire reader, f!reader

As punishment for your sins, you, a young vampire, are banished — not just from your home, but to a different world entirely. Now, you find yourself in a foreign place where Quirks and heroes are the norm. In addition to coming to terms with your new life, you must also face your greatest challenge: controlling your massive thirst for blood.

also available on Ao3 and Wattpad!

Infatuated | yandere!bnha x reader my hero academia, yandere, reverse harem, f!reader

Your Quirk is rather unique. It plays out almost like a game, giving you missions and goals that help you become stronger. On top of that, you also have the ability to charm those around you. It sounds innocent enough on paper, and you can’t help but revel in the attention everyone keeps showering you with. But what happens when their feelings give way to something more sinister?

Love Bite | oc!vampires x reader yandere, reverse harem, vampires, original characters, f!reader

Desperate for money to pay off your debts, you sign up for a program that allows you to sell your blood to vampires. At first, everything is fine, and you’re finally able to make ends meet. But they soon begin craving more than just your blood.

also available on Wattpad!

Tears of a Villainess | yandere!ocs x reader yandere, reverse harem, isekai, original characters, f!reader

Reincarnation isn't as great as it sounds, especially when you've been reborn as none other than the villainess. Fated to die if you stand in the heroine's way, you immediately resolve to distance yourself from the plot. As long as you have nothing to do with any of the relevant characters, surely, you'll be able to avoid an untimely death. But in a horrible turn of events, the heroine ends up wanting to get close to you. Are you really doomed to meet the villainess' tragic end? Or is there an even more sinister fate that awaits you?

Girlfriend-For-Hire | yandere!ocs x reader yandere, reverse harem, original characters, f!reader

Hoping to try something new and earn a bit of money on the side, you join an app that lets people hire you for your dating services. The idea is pretty straightforward — you pose as the client's girlfriend for a brief period of time, and in turn, you receive payment. But you didn't foresee everyone getting so attached to you, and suddenly, they're no longer satisfied with a fabricated relationship.

Changing Plotlines | yandere!ocs x reader yandere, reverse harem, isekai, original characters, f!reader

A desperate cry on your deathbed leads to you being given a fresh start at life. You're overjoyed at having finally obtained a healthy body and a real chance at living normally, only to discover that you've been transported into a yandere game, where danger lurks at every corner. Determined to protect your new life at any cost, you vow to stay as far away from the major characters of the game as possible. But things don't always go as planned.

Bewitched | yandere!ocs x reader yandere, reverse harem, magic, witches, f!reader

Having awoken one day with no memories apart from your name, you are endlessly thankful when a kind family decides to take you in as their own. But it appears as though your fate cannot be so easily overwritten, and as you discover more and more about the person you were meant to be, the hearts of those around you seem to change in a sinister way.

also available on Wattpad!

Crushed Velvet | yandere!ocs x reader yandere, reverse harem, original characters, f!reader

Your parents are thrilled to have secured an engagement for you with the royal family. Your suitor, the crown prince, has agreed to be wed to you. It seems as though your entire future has been assured, so why is it that from this moment onward, your life starts to fall apart at the seams?

⊱.⋅follow + post notifications on for story update announcements or join the author's discord!⋅.⊰

[yanderemommabean]

Yandere Choso X Reader fic

(Quick note! This was a com, who ill keep anonymous, but I was told this was A-Okay to post and share! I hope you beans enjoy! The premise is Choso being affected by Hanami's flower in a sex pollen sense, and it goes from there! CW: Dub-con, but con at the end, chasing through woods, random guy gets obliterated for talking to reader, and reader is female/has AFAB language! Its a bit of a read of 3,500 or more words so get cozy!)

------

His skin feels like it's incessantly itching. His eyes glean more dilated and red than usual as he looks around his room, pacing the floors like a beast caged. Choso can’t explain it, honestly. He would just feel better if you were here, safe and sound by his side like you should always be-- Especially after how harrowing that fight got when he was slammed into Hanami. Flower buds burst open when Choso’s body  brutally collided into the curse, and thankfully he was able to take the brunt of what followed, but you…

He clutches his hair a bit, not wanting to think of what could happen if you were any closer than you were. To think anything could happen to you at all made him feel shaky and uneasy and he knows that can cascade into a pit of despair if let to simmer for too long. It’s a bad habit of his; he’s had it for as long as he’s been the eldest brother. It’s never really let up, in fact he’d say it’s worse now since he’s been given people to care for again. He can’t be fully blamed for that can he? After coming into this world, you and Yuuji were really all he had to get him by. Loss hurts. He’s so tired of that aching loneliness.

Going from adversaries to allies was the least of what anyone expected though  he wouldn’t have it any other way. You managed to bring to life what he thought was dead and buried. He’d been so sure he’d strangled it with his own hands.

Choso couldn’t ask for a better friend, yet… Lately he’ll admit, he’s been craving more than just  that. When he gets a glimpse of you, he has to force himself to behave and not gather you into his arms, insistent to press his lips to yours and drink in the taste of you. It’s all he’s been wanting these past few days, picturing how your voice would go weak as you beg him for more. 

Dear god, he wants to give you more. He’d give you anything your pretty beating heart would desire, simply as long as you only called his name; only ever allowed his fingers and lips to explore your body. 

Before you, Choso never once considered looking for a lover. He was sure your kindness could only stretch so thin, denying him anyway. Alas, he was contempt in letting you radiate the sunshine in his life as he loved from afar. After that Hanami incident however, he isn't so willing to sit and wait anymore. 

“Cho?” Your voice calls out, poking your head into the room as he paces like an animal being caged. His eyes dart to where you stand, mouth acting before his brain could catch up. “Where the hell have you been?” 

You’re both stunned by the coldness his usually warm voice held. You stay still, eyes rounded as you decide to fully enter the room to ask just what the hell his problem was. He’d been aggressive before, sure. You’ve seen him be rough and ruthless as he fights, spewing venomous words and poisoned blood to pry open curses like pistachios. Though, never has he had that sort of cold and demanding tone with you. 

“I'm sorry…” he utters, delicate and tired as he walks over, embracing you tightly. You hug him back on instinct, pressing your face into his chest as you feel him play with your hair; pressing his face into it as he breathes your scent in to calm his nerves. Oh dear god, it does the exact opposite. That sweet scent only lets his blood rush south and his mouth goes dry; his fingers start to shake as they brush through your hair and do their best not to yank your head back to force his lips on yours. 

You have to be fucking with him. You have to be. Teasing him with every movement you make as his sanity trickles from his ears and he comes closer and closer to just giving in and sinking his teeth into you. Maybe even in a literal sense with how desperate he is to mark you up and keep others away. Or to show you off and to taunt the other, lesser men who thought they could ever get ahold of a gem like you. Pathetic, really. 

Those vermin need to crawl on their knees and beg for his forgiveness when he gets ahold of them. 

“Look, you’ve been cooped up in here for a while, Choso” You say as you begin to pry away from his tight embrace -was he always this hard to pull away from? “I think you should come with me on a little walk. I know you hate the town so the woods should be fine, right? Fresh air, no paranoid thoughts, you’ll get to see that everyone's ok! I mean, I know how you get when you worry too much…” It’s nothing like that. Though, how can he tell you that? How could he shatter this image you have of him etched into your mind’s eye? How could this beast look at such innocent prey and tell them he’s about to devour them? 

He’ll hide that for now. Maybe you’re right. Maybe this is all because he’s gotten sick from Hanami and needs to just let the air and the sunlight heal him. You had never led him astray before.

He trusts you to lead him; guiding him away from the solitude of his living arrangement as he follows dutifully beside you. His body becomes flushed and red as your scent only grows more and more enticing. Do the people walking by not sense it at all? How delectable you smell? How you desperately need to be stuffed to the brim until your voice is broken? 

A deep breath, and the curse composes himself. Breeding you in public wouldn’t be ideal anyway. These sick humans would want to taint you, take you away, try to have a piece for themselves, and he wouldn’t hesitate to level a few buildings to make them scatter like the roaches they are. 

“Hey, is there anything else you’re not telling me? I mean even in messages you seem, I don’t know…Off '' You ask, stopping mid walk to turn and look up at him. His long hair was down from his usual pigtails and in this light his eyes held more of a dark, dare you say hunter-like aura; it only added to the man's beauty. His scowl seemed to grow as he watched more people walk by, getting way too close to you-- way too comfortable with your personal space. 

The woods was just another five minute walk away, and yet it felt like an eternity trying to get there. 

“Well, some troubling thoughts have been arising” He admits, while rather harshly yanking you closer as the sidewalk turns into a path that leads into the trees. 

“These people need to get away from us. I’m about to strike down the next one who gets too close, I swear.” He grits out, teeth showing in a snarl as he looks over his shoulder, watching as the last two people he hoped would be on this trail were leaving. 

You aren’t sure what to even say, you’ve never seen him this high strung before. That’s honestly saying a lot with what you’ve seen Gojo and Yuuji  put him through. But in all seriousness, you were beginning to feel uneasy, like something dark was bubbling beneath the surface. You are starkly reminded that he is in fact, a special grade curse.

“L-let’s just calm down and get to the woods before we vent ok?” You say with a forced laugh, feeling the energy shifting even more as a jogger comes running up the way, and stopping to catch his breath. He hunches over, hands on his knees as he lets his lungs get in whatever air they could.  With a wipe to his brow, he began smiling up at you two with what Choso saw as a flirtatious smile while you only saw a friendly one. “Careful out there” he says between breaths, standing up fully. “It’s getting dark. You know how those trails get when you can’t see as good. Hate for a cutie like you to get lost…” he says, looking like he was moving in to press closer. “Especially with someone like him-” he whispers, gesturing vaguely “-are you safe with him? Do you trust him?”.

After that question, you feel as though a snap of electricity went through the air. 

That’s when it all goes downhill. The warm splash mixed with the thudding of a now headless body hitting the ground, you can’t comprehend what you’re seeing for a few horrifying seconds. It's silent somehow. That’s the worst part. It’s like the world isn’t aware that a man was just beheaded and killed before your very eyes, his lifeless body now bleeding out on the dirt before you and the curse who did the horrible deed. 

“He touched you” Choso spits, eyes holding a viper-like stare as he wipes his cheek, a blood streak following his knuckles as he spits at the man's corpse. You act on instinct. You rush forward, your feet carrying you like your life was about to end, and for all you knew, it was. There wasn’t any semblance of the Choso you knew in those eyes as he struck down the innocent man who wanted to check on you. You can’t even begin to process the words Choso is throwing at you as he chases you through the rocks and trees, the sun beginning to fully set as the hunt begins. 

You feel like a deer trying to sprint away from a predator. Every flicker of your eyes shows his face, still blood speckled as he runs after you. Every twist and turn you take only makes your heart beat faster as you look for any possible hiding spots, anything to shield you from whatever wrath Choso has had buried within him these last few days. Why? Why is he doing this? He seems so evil and terrifying! You almost let out a sob, hunching over behind a large tree so your breath could come back to you. “Don’t you dare show feelings for someone like him” Choso snarls, but it’s far away, his voice sounding strained as he tries to speak. “Don’t you get it? I did that to protect you! All these people, they…They don’t want what's best for you, they want to hurt you!” Hurt you? Telling you to be safe was hurting you? No, Choso’s just lost it, he’s gone completely crazy! 

“Y/N…You know I’d never hurt you” His voice pacifies, coming closer and closer as you fear trying to flee from the tree you’re behind. Oh god please, please don’t let him find you. Don’t let him kill you! “I’d never forgive myself if you were hurt” He continues, stalking closer like a large cat as he follows your scent. “I just want to have you safe. To be pampered. To be mine as I lavish you in my love and adoration” he seemingly purrs, voice dropping an octave as he stalks closer and closer, knowing exactly where you were hiding.

“To have you bear my own children…have you love me as I love you. To taste you. Feel you. Have your body molded to fit mine as we breed like rabbits” he chuckles, dark and sinister as his fantasies seem to take over and spill from his lips. “Tell me, Y/N, are you a gentle lover? Or do you need me to bruise you a little? Rough? Soft? However you need it, you know I’ll give it to you until your pretty little head is empty and only full of thoughts of me.” 

That voice, that sultry purr, was this some sort of sick thrill for him? 

You don’t get much time to dwell on his true intentions. Once you feel his presence behind you, it’s too late. In a blink, your hands are being pinned, and your mouth is covered by his hand. Your eyes meet beautifully dark ones, staring at you like you were a meal he couldn’t wait to devour. 

“Gotcha.” You whimper, shaking your head as Choso simply stares for a moment, soaking in your scent and salivating at the intensity of it. There’s no way he’s not getting a taste of you. He’s even worked up the appetite for it. Once his hand pulls away, you openly sob, shaking and terrified. “Please, please don’t kill me! I-I thought we were-” He clicks his tongue, grabbing your face roughly as he pulls you into an intense kiss. It’s abrupt, unplanned, but he doesn’t care anymore. He’s had enough of these feelings building and building with no release. He’s taking what he wants, and he’s going to be sure you enjoy every bit of what he plans to ensnare. 

You find yourself melting into the kiss. You’re confused, and admittedly turned on at the same time. The panted breaths shared between you are hot and primal. He knows how to suck and bite just right to get your lips to open, allowing his eager tongue to slip inside and taste you, dragging the tip of his tongue over the pad of your mouth while his hand goes to your hair, pressing your face closer so he can kiss you deeper. 

The deep moans Choso makes as his tongue curls around your mouth, they’re deep and hungry, making your thighs clench together even more. Fuck, are you actually into this? You can’t even feel the amount of shame that you think should as the kiss becomes more feverish, both of you panting and moaning into one another's mouths as he tugs and paws at your clothes. He’s so close to just tearing them off if they keep denying him contact with your warm skin. 

He needs you. He needs to feel you pressed against him, bare and naked. He won’t let you get away until his cravings are satiated; your body decorated in his teeth and nail marks. “Choso wait-” You breathe, light headed and confused as you press at his chest, tears still drying on your face. You needed a second to breathe, to think! Everythings happening too fast and too much and- “Say my name again.” he demands, low and carnal as his hands tear off your bottoms. In one fell swoop your wet panties came off with the shorts you wore to make walking easier; showing Choso that at the very least, your body was enjoying this. Who were you kidding? You wanted this to keep going. That fever pitch was only rising and that desperation was filling you too. You wanted to see what he could do to you. Despite being terrified for your life, you knew you were safe. Well, as safe as one could be with a rabid dog like Choso had become. A collared beast isn’t a threat to their owner though, yeah?

“I said-” he barks, pulling you forward to steal another heated kiss, one hand coming to shuck off his own pants. “Say my name again.” 

There was no room for arguing. Decorum had left the moment the chase started. You look up into his eyes, kiss swollen lips parted as you both press forward into an embrace. There was a beat of silence, like you both were caught in admiration of one another. The forest waits on baited breath before you reach your hand up and wrap around his neck, holding yourself up as he wraps your leg around his waist. “Choso.” It sent a visceral shock down his spine hearing you say that in such a way. So needy, begging for him to keep his body against yours as you both find yourself kissing again, his hand coming to cup your ass and hold you up until you’re backed against the same tree you were just trembling and crying behind. Everything blurs after that. There’s clothes coming off completely, possessive phrases being moaned into your mouth or bitten into your skin as he falls apart, greedily taking in whatever he could of you as you two go at it like animals. You swallow, deep and nervous when you feel his cock pulsing against you. Where the hell was that thing hiding? Is that why he wears baggy clothes?! He doesn’t let your mind wander for too long. His fingers grip your face again, tilting your head upwards to meet his lust filled eyes. In this moon light, he looks even more inhuman. A true monster who got what he wanted. A death painting. Part of you feels like you want to see him like this more often. Hopefully with less murder involved. 

“Eyes on me baby. Only me” he commands, holding you still as he guides himself into you, inch by thick inch. Your entire world was on tilt, feeling him enter you while your legs trembled and struggled to hold onto his waist. How was he so strong? Holding you up this easy, it made your mind race and trip over itself with imagining what all he was holding back on, how he could manhandle you as he pleased. 

“Fuck, you’re taking me so good. Just like that.” he praises, and fuck, it goes right to your core, making you pulse and throb with arousal as he begins to pump into you. You feel yourself go taut as he decides to press you into the ground, his cock angling even deeper inside of you as he has you in a damn near mating press. 

“To think I waited for this-” he groans, deep and guttural as he begins to grind into you, over and over, long and languid strokes to drag the pleasure out of both of you. “-Ngh, to think I wouldn’t have you, begging for me and my cock, moaning for me like a good little whore.” “Ch-Choso!” You gasp, choked and stunned as he begins to speed up, the haze only growing as he holds his hand to your throat and buries into you over and over again. “You should have been mine since I fucking laid eyes on you! Fuck-I should make you my pretty little mommy, breed you like your pussy craves until we have more kids than I have brothers.” he rambles, tensing up and manking sure his angles were just right, stroking every bump and ridge inside of you. Your toes are curling at this, being used like some flesh light while Choso babbles away about how he owns you, how he wont let anyone even breathe near you, all while his massive cock carves its place inside of you. It can’t be helped when you scramble for any sort of purchase, grabbing onto his arm and clawing at his skin, drawing blood as you clench your fingers. 

Your mouth falls open, heat flooding your system as you moan louder than you’re sure you ever have when you used toys or had sad experiences with other dates. It was so much, it was too much. You hadn’t known you’d be so turned on by this; how possessive Choso was, never even considered it until now. 

With the way your body tensed, a splash of your cum coating Choso’s cock and dripping down to the forest floor, there was no denying it. You were perfectly ruined for this man. The white hot pleasure came rushing behind your eyes, your back arching off of the ground as you cried out, spasming and writhing as your orgasm wracked your frame. 

Choso watches, enthralled and beyond turned on as he watches you fall apart. His hand comes to press right on your abdomen, feeling how deep he is inside of you as his thrusts refuse to cease. “That’s it. Good fucking girl, Y/N. Feel how deep I'm going to breed you? How full I’m going to make your womb? Fuck, you’re going to be so pretty round and soft with our babies.” He’s lost in his animalistic thoughts, his pace picking up as he sloppily kisses you, chasing your taste with his lips and tongue as his balls slap against your ass, his orgasm coming to its peak. “Going to mark you from the inside, make you mine.” he growls, only getting your weak and worn out whimpers in return as you watch how his cock enters you over and over, knowing he means every word. He steals another desperate kiss, his hips suddenly stilling as warm fluid empties into you, fucked deeper and deeper into your core. You shudder, feeling like an aftershock of pleasure leaves you as his cock slips out and his load begins to follow. You two sit there, panting and catching your breath. Choso seems so much more, how do you say, soothed? Subdued? Pacified? Whatever it is, he seems so much more calm than he had earlier as he admires how his seed leaks from you and lets his fingers play with your soaked and swollen hole. “Hmph. I love how you jerk and twitch from this. Sensitive aren’t you?” he chuckles, crawling on top of you again, admiring every bite mark that was now swelling and welting. “I think this is a good start.” “T…To what?” you ask, head more clear as you try to once again process everything that’s happening. “Our family” he says, like he didn’t just rearrange your guts. “I'm going to make us a family. A big family. A loving one unlike the one I was brought up with.” 

He smiles, soft and amused as he plays with a few strands of your hair, like you weren't covered in dirt and sweat. “I’ll give you a few minutes before we get started again”. 

((I hope you beans loved it! -mommabean))

[alwaysshallow]

@bunnyreaper's secret santa thing; I had the pleasure to write for @cooliofango ❤️ I hope you're gonna have the best time reading this, love.

AO3 VERSION

Simon isn't there—that's the first thing you notice, when you wake up.

You think it's odd; he always sticks around, especially in the morning. Either he is reading something in bed, a book or an article, or tries to wake you up, softly, kissing your arm, if it was past nine in the morning.

Right now, even his side of the bed is cold, so he had to leave at least an hour ago, maybe more. You get up with a slight frown on your face, multiple questions in the back of your mind, what possibly could bring Simon out of bed. There's many thoughts, and they aren't really positive; usually if he had to leave, it was something military related. A missile missing, someone to rescue, intel to get or secure.

Being with Riley made you realize how fucked up the world is and how many times it needs to be saved. This time though, in theory, he has vacations that he asked for. Holidays with his girlfriend, he said, which caused you to grin like crazy one, since you loved this term. His girlfriend, his significant other with whom he decided to spend time with, even if he doesn't like holidays.

It's main reason why you aren't really doing anything festive this year; out of respect to him. Sure, you spend more time together, you plan to watch movies tonight, make some food, but nothing really related to Christmas. No lights, no tree, nothing what could possibly trigger his memory with the holidays and make the time worse than it already was.

But now, your boyfriend is nowhere to be seen, and your plans are under a big question mark. You don't even know where he is, if he is here, in your shared house that you've decided to buy a few months ago.

"Baby?" you call out, looking around. There's a few boxes laying on the ground, door is wide-open; if you wouldn't know any better, you'd assume that somebody broke in. Knowing your boyfriend though, how he secured the house... hell, it takes only one wrong move and alarm goes off, as Simon said once, shortly after he installed it.

So, door wide-open, bringing in the cold, clear indicator that he actually is here somewhere. And, sooner than later, you'll see him.

You prefer sooner than later, though, so you go through the door, just to see your man with a tree—Christmas tree, to be precise—with shocked expression on his face. Then, he puts it down, just to sneak his arms around you, tight. Just like he loved to do, practically from the start of your relationship.

For a military man, he is very touch starved, and you try every time to give him the love he deserves.

"You didn't wake me," you murmur into his broad chest, at which he chuckles. You look up at him, seeing his brown eyes sparkling.

"Sorry, love. Had to take care of some things," he says, his hand caressing your back delicately. "But 'm here now. Let's go to bed, yeah?"

"Oh, no, no," you laugh, shaking your head. "I want to know why there's a Christmas tree here. And those boxes? Seems like decorations to me, Mr. Riley."

He acts like you caught him red handed on something; Simon looks away and sighs, just to look at you a few seconds later with a semi-guilty look on his face. You have to hold back a laugh; he seems so stressed about something simple, it's adorable.

"I don't like Christmas," he starts, playing with your hair. "But I know you like 'em. Your eyes sparkle every time you see this shit, lights, trees, everythin' and—"

"—Simon, we don't have to—"

"—let me finish." He looks at you, a bit sternly, so you nod. You have to listen to him, especially if he asks you to. "And I just can't do this to you. Take it away from you. 'm a grown man, it's time to change some things. 'specially those hurtful ones."

You gnaw at your bottom lip, silent for a few seconds, as you try to collect your thoughts about this situation. It's hard not to cry right now, given how he overcomes his own weaknesses, just for you. Just for the both of you, so your future will be brighter.

"You are," you cup his cheeks into your hands, "the best man I've ever, ever met. I'm so lucky to have you, you know? A man that's willing to spend Christmas with me the traditional way, to

“You can't say this shit to me,” he warns, his voice almost a whisper. You raise your eyebrow, but you don't stop kissing his jaw, even when he sighs.

"Because that's so bad? Or because that's the truth and you'll blush any second?" you ask teasingly, at which he rolls his eyes with a small smile on his lips. To see his smile, to see how happy you can make him... you cherish every moment like that, knowing his history. Knowing how hard it was, how hard it still is because demons doesn't go easily.

Yet, you see the progress. His battle, to be more open, to allow himself to be more vulnerable at least around you.

“You’re gonna make me even more addicted," he explains to you, kissing your face a few times. He bangs with his nose against your eyeglasses, but he doesn't really seem to mind. "And I’m already weak. It's like... you're something that I’m not immune to. Everyone will see that later, on that Christmas party.”

He doesn’t say he loves you. That would be crazy, he thinks; every time he told someone he loves them, they died. He doesn't want it to happen with you, not when he didn't think of an idea how to possibly save you, keep you safe and locked, close to his heart.

But he can’t deny that you have him wrapped around your finger and you always will. Task Force 141 knows about you, they even invited you two to the Christmas party later, but the l-word has to wait. You know that he loves you anyway; maybe he doesn't say it, but his actions shows you enough love. And, he has other words—be safe, you know I care about you.

It speaks louder than simple I love you but he knows he's gonna say it. He has to, even for your sake.

"That's good. I love you being addicted." You grin, hugging him even tighter. "Because I'm addicted to you as well. To my big, wonderful boyfriend. Now... about those Christmas decorations."

You wouldn't think that decorating your shared house with Simon would be so fun and chaotic in the same time. Your boyfriend does the lights—since his height abilities are just insane—and you are basically running around with snowmen, reindeers and other creatures that you somehow can associate with winter. Riley also gives you disapproval looks from time to time, telling you to dress yourself properly, as you're just on your pyjamas; it ends up in you being in his big, warm hoodie, since you don't listen.

It's like everything you dreamed for, in domestic matter.

The best is taking care of the tree, though. You two have different ideas—yours with doing it in two colors that compliment each other, red and gold for example, which would give the glamour vibe of the house. Or, Simon's idea which is complete chaos. He looks so happy with placing the ornaments, that you don't tell him about color theory, you don't suggest making it less colorful either.

You just put everything just like he is, with instinct, and when he asks about your opinion, you can't help but smile widely and praise him for being creative. His enjoyment gives you the time of your life, honestly.

"You do it like it's in your blood," you say, laughing happily when he gives your cheek a big, wet kiss. His arms locks around you automatically, his lips dropping a bit lower.

"'st because of you. My girl," he purrs. "Maybe we should take a break and eat somethin', eh? Something Christmas-y."

"Christmas-y?" you repeat, observing with a small smile stomach how he drags you over to the couch, towering over you. He has absolutely no problem with crashing you with his weight, which feels so good considering how warm he is. "What would you like?"

"Anything my woman wants, I'll eat. My civilian woman."

You can't help the sensation of your heart fluttering at this view; at Simon kissing your knuckles, at Simon being so affectionate. You are sure that you haven't seen him like this before, not this open with his feelings.

"Yours. That civilian woman, for a superordinary man," you say, quietly.

“My civilian woman.” Simon’s eyes shine as he repeats your words, a light smirk forming as he gazes down at you. You really are gorgeous, so beautiful as you're there in his arms. "'m not superordinary, but I guess I'll take it."

He reaches over to remote, turning off the light in the room. Now, all that’s illuminated is the moonlight and sparkling, multicolor Christmas lights, casting a pale ray of light in the darkness.

Before he loses himself in your eyes, he leans over and presses his mouth to yours. It’s a slow, quiet, yet passionate kiss—one that sparks a fire in both your souls.

"That sounds very dorky, if you think about it," you chuckle quietly, still keeping his gaze. His brown eyes are fixed on yours, glimmering so gently, you can't help but be lost in them. God, it's even better when he turned off the light. You don't see each other properly, but the dark figures are adding everything to your imagination, when you continue this slow kiss.

You can only hear your lips smacking against each other.

“You’re perfect to me,” he says, his voice husky as he gazes down at you. You make his heart flutter. You always do, but lately, those butterflies have turned into something else, as he told you a dew days ago. "The most perfect woman in the world. Even if it's cheesy, as you say."

"You're such a cheesy man, Riley," you whisper, as you smile at his sudden comment how you are perfect to him. Knowing that he's not the best with words, and still says something like this, was just the most important thing for you. "But I like that in you. Just as much as your soft spot for those romcoms we watch. Even if you call them sappy and cringe," you say, closing your eyes.

"They are sappy and cringe. But it's our type of sappy and cringe," he murmurs into your skin, burying his face in your neck. Right in this moment, he doesn't seem to care about anything else.

And you don't care about anything else either, when you have him right by your side. Safe and secure, far from deployment, far from all those dangerous things probably just waiting for him out there.

"I love you," he whispers.

And you know you have your gift.

[yandereunsolved]

Yandere Daryl Dixon w/ immune reader— 'we're all infected, why does it matter if you're the cure?'

Yandere Daryl saw your scraggly ass aimlessly wandering through the abandoned pharmacy he needed to raid. Walkers, five of em', and you fought them off bare fisted. Pretty badass, and fucking stupid, if Daryl has anything to say about it. You're bleeding from your neck more than any living person should.

A bite. You're bit.

No wonder you could care less if one of the rotting corpses bites on ya.

He wants to put you down like he should. He lines up his crossbow with your head, and like a deer caught in headlights, you flee.

Goddammit all.

Shouldn't matter anyway. You'll become another walker. At the most you got some gauze.

It had to be months again before he saw you on another run. There you are—banged up and just a lil more than skin n' bones, but there you are alive none the less.

Yandere Daryl admits to himself that it's the first time he's been intrigued by someone in a long while. Maybe that's why he's insisted on going on runs by himself these past few months. Maybe just maybe deep down he wanted to see you again.

It isn't hard to simply surprise you from behind and disarm you. He knocks you out and lowers you to the sidewalk. He doesn't see any walkers near, so he can check your wound out easy.

You still have gauze over it, but it has long since needed a change. It's drenched in fresh blood and covered in old. He unwraps it to see the damn bite. He can't tell if it looks better or worse now.

"Poor sap, what am I gonna do with you? Whats good a cure if there's no docs, only greedy men in this world." He tsks.

Yandere Daryl picks you up and carries you back to the group. He wraps a slightly torn shawl around your neck. It's one he found near the store you collapsed at. There's a reason you have been out here all these months.

You could'a just given up and died.

You could'a found a group.

Instead you found him again.

"Must've been fate, huh?" He chuckles humorlessly.

The way you looked at him. You're runnin' from somethin'. He just has to figure out what.

Yandere Daryl decides you're his to take care of. When he carries you into Alexandria, he doesn't let anyone else get their hands on you. He doesn't answer anyone's questions while he walks in and towards his house. He locks himself in and tells anyone that comes by to piss off.

Screw the rules and whatever the fuck.

You're a mystery that he has to solve.

So he grabs a change of clothes and some food for you. He plops them down on the table and sits in the opposite chair.

He doesn't mind waitin' for a while. It gives him plenty o' time to think. Somethin' in him is just stirrin'. He just can't decide what.

Yandere Daryl calms you down after you wake up. You can barely form words on those pretty lips and tongue of yours. Naturally, you question him and his motives. You're defensive and don't elaborate at first.

It takes just a handful of threats about exposing you and spreading around the fact there is an immune person to unravel your need for secrecy.

Somewhat.

You only tell him that you're being hunted by a group you were once with.

"Mind elaborating, hun?" Daryl draws out while looking over your figure for what feels like the thousandth time.

"I'll tell you—but I swear to God if you use this against me I'll stab you through the head a dozen times over."

"Fair nuff."

"They would—If you get bit and are injected with... well, enough of my blood then it acts as a cure..."

They fuckin' what?

Yandere Daryl vouches for you, and you end up in Alexandria. You get no ifs, ands, or buts about it. They assign you to his house. Daryl definitely convinced Rick that since you're a newcomer and you trust him more, he could keep a watchful eye on you. It totally isn't because there's this strange all possessing feeling that keeps latching onto his heart when you're around.

He keeps your secret safe n' sound. He manages to steal enough makeup from rundown stores to keep your healing bite covered up. He makes sure you are eating and getting healthier. He checks up on you before and after he gets done with a run. Hell, he reminds you of shit he forgets about all the time.

This does extend to him killing people to keep you safe. They looked at you wrong. Maybe one of the residents feels suspicious about you. They may even have confronted Daryl and questioned him. Oh, well. Just another one pushed to the biters.

Daryl has never had a strict moral compass. So he doesn't feel bad about murdering people who he is supposed to consider his neighbors.

Of course, those who came with him to Alexandria get the privilege of questionin' you just a bit. He's quick to shut that shit down, though.

Carol is the only one who is close enough to knowing that you are immune. She knows that Daryl has something more than platonic towards you. She also knows that you were injured with something that looked suspiciously like a walker bite mark when Daryl first lugged you in. (She snuck in and looked through your scarf while Daryl wasn't aware.)

She just isn't looking for trouble. She doesn't want to believe it, as it doesn't seem plausible. There have been too many false hopes from the CDC to Eugene.

So she let's Daryl foster his feelings towards you while watching out for you both. If Daryl ever oversteps a boundary with you, Carol will be there to knock him up side the head, call him a stupid redneck, and threaten him in the most motherly way possible. 

Yandere Daryl never saw you have so much terror in the eyes as the day he mentioned The Saviors. It clicked in his mind immediately. He has only felt that rage one other time in his life: when he learned Meryl had been handcuffed to the roof and left for dead.

He didn't think, but he acted. He held you and refused to let go. It's just so fuckin' unfair. He loses everyone that has a semblance of importance to him. Not you. Not this time.

His only thought was that he was going to burn every one of those fuckers to the ground—innocent or not.

[helpwhatsthis]

okay, pitching my thoughts for a cute eric fic that could easily still follow the correct movie plot...

Maybe he has a favorite coffee shop to stop at before he goes to work and everyday he sees the same girl. He thinks she's pretty and he thinks it's cute that she's always wearing one of those little cat backpacks. He's made small talk with her a couple times and he's learned that she's a piercer/tattoo artist down the street from the coffee shop. The cat that is always with her is an anxiety service animal that she takes to work to help clients that get a little more freaked out during their appointments.

The monetary conversations carry on for a long time. They end up in line next to each other every morning, chat while they wait for their coffee, and then part ways until the next day.

Until one day, eric decides this is it. This is the day that he's finally going to grow a pair and ask her out. It goes better than he thought it would. She writes her number on his arm and says something about how she was starting to worry that he never would. They are both so excited to text later and plan a date.

And then the world decides to go and just fucking end????

They both think about each other as they are surviving, hoping that against the odds that the other is okay. deep down they are both hurting because they know that they'll probably never see one another again.

eric makes it onto the boat and is grateful that he and frodo survived, now mourning the loss of sam as well. it's probably been an hour but when he finally looks up and scans the boat, he sees a very familiar backpack with an even more familiar cat in it.

he makes his way over and sees that it's an old lady who's sitting with the cat and he starts to panic. maybe he's going crazy and it's not her cat. or worse. maybe she didn't make it and this woman found her cat and saved it and he really never would see her again.

he asks her where she got the cat from and she tells him that when the boat first arrived, there had been a stampede and the owner of the cat had fallen and hit her head. she also says that the owner had been taken to the lower level of the deck to be given any medical assistance that was possible at the moment. he waits, whispering introductions between her cat and frodo.

when the door leading to the lower deck opens, he stands. he sees her and he's so relieved that he can't even move, but he watches as she whispers his name to herself and pushes her way toward him.

it feels like a whole lifetime since they saw each other last but the ink is still faint on erics arm and they are both still alive. while eric isn't one for having a lot of hope, he thinks that's a sign.

[kairiscorner]

married life. — kento nanami x spouse!reader (part 1)

summary: he'd give up his old habits and more just to see you smile, be with you for a little longer, and make you the happiest person in the whole damn world; he's your husband for that very reason. pairing: nanami kento x spouse!gn!reader genre: tooth-rotting fluff !! content warnings: mentions of slight alcoholism author's note: i saw that fanart of nanami that i reblogged and my mind just came up with all kinds of shit for him. i loved him for 6 months straight, I WANNA GET BACK THERE, LET ME LOVE HIM FOR 6 MONTHS MORE !!

kento nanami comes home from his dead-end, nowhere 9 to 5 job, exhausted and in need of rest. about a year ago, all he had to comfort him was a bottle of pricey wine that he indulged in every end of the month or so, not minding it was nearing its expiry date. he only had store-bought bread and whatever melodramatic soap opera was on TV to entertain him.

kento nanami was indeed, lonely; he was well aware of his own loneliness and needed nobody to point that out for him. it always made him feel worse whenever anybody would say how handsome he is or he's not getting any younger and that he has to settle down at some point.

kento nanami was never the jealous type, though whenever he'd hear word about a coworker of his or whoever getting married and being invited to the ceremony, he'd always feel a kind of pang in his heart, knowing he could never have that kind of life.

kento nanami had given up all hope of finding the right person, none of the people he had met recently were anything he felt connected to (or could even start a conversation with).

kento nanami used to clutch his wine bottle at night, hiccuping in a drunken state as the dialogue from the characters on the late night soap opera on TV was fading from his senses and sleep had come to finally take him away.

kento nanami however, gets woken up in the middle of the night to the feeling of warm hands on both sides of his face; hearing a soft, gentle voice call his name as he grumbles and groans.

kento nanami hears a giggle ring throughout his ears as he's being helped up by soft hands. "kento... if you were that tired, you could've asked for my help, love." you chided him gently as he hummed in confusion.

kento nanami sighed as he tried to stand up. "my... spouse isn't gonna like... that you're helping my drunk self off the couch... right now..." he said as he nearly staggered, but you aided him up as you nearly carried him up the stairs. "they don't want to see... me drinking anymore... but i can't help it, i miss them... too much, the alcohol... it brings me closer to them, lets me stay with them a little... little longer in my dreams..." he mumbled.

kento nanami began to tear up lightly as he kept mumbling and muttering about how much he loves his spouse, how much they saved him from a lifetime of loneliness he already accepted was going to be his life. "i can't believe that... that i... i was saved from... growing old all by myself... a miserable, meaningless life... a life without them by them... and i pull this stunt on them after... promising i'd be better... it didn't make me feel any better, it made me feel sadder." he confessed to you as you got him up to your shared bedroom and laid him down on the bed.

kento nanami sobbed as he kept going on and on about his beloved spouse, how he wants to be better and that they've looked forward to the day when he could spend one evening without him being passed out on the couch from the habit he had yet to get rid of him drinking himself to sleep before he got married.

kento nanami felt loving hands stroke his hair and shush him, kissing his temples as he tried to say sorry to his spouse. "please stop kissing and holding me... my spouse'll be sad... i wanna see them so bad..." he whispered as you chuckled. "kento, i am your spouse." you tell him as you felt over his ring finger, the two of you wearing the rings you both slid on each other on the day of your wedding.

kento nanami blinked his tears away in realization, and his face scrunched up even more as he began to sob harder. he wrapped his arms around your waist and cried into your shoulder, apologizing that he should've squared up, he shouldn't have let you down, but you shushed him and told him with a comforting voice that it was okay. "it's hard to get out of a habit, love... i know that. i'm not angry, i'm not disappointed... i'll stay with you forever, kento, you don't need to keep that in your dreams. i'll always be with you." you promised him as you kissed the top of his head, with him thanking you and kissing your cheeks, his tears wetting them as he muttered how in love he is with you, how he'll work on this starting tomorrow, but for now... all he wants to do is hold you in his arms and sleep with you, just lay here on the bed with you in his arms and with his heart beating in harmony with yours.

[dawnoftime22]

make it okay.

| W.M -> N.R

Undeserving of a Love Like Yours, Chapter 6

Chapter Warnings: Some subjects that you can kind of count as sensitive? Not getting enough sleep, Overthinking, Mental exhaustion, cheating, sad wanda and...I think, that's it. (please tell me if I'm missing any!)

Summary: With having finished a breakup with a cheating brunette, you go to visit Kate in New York, needing a best friend to keep you company in these trying times of yours.

Series Summary: When you're stuck in a complete hole of confusion and hurt with the one you thought you loved most, a certain redhead finds her way into your life.

Word Count: 5.1k

Category: Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Angst

A/N: I'm veeeeery tired. very. need a hug. past few days was just :( also this chapter is mostly just kate giving comfort. sorry if I wrote her in a way thats off from her? I rarely write her character, but it was definitely fun, along with lucky. enjoy :]

Series Playlist

| Started on 05/03/2024, 3:49 PM |

| Finished on 18/03/2034, 6:53 PM |

Masterlist | Series Masterlist | N.R Masterlist

<- Chapter 5 Chapter 7 ->

"Having a soft and kind heart is a dangerous way of staying alive, sure. But I don't understand being cold and cruel when most of the world already is."

|——————————— ➳ ———————————|

After getting off the phone with Kate, you clicked on your seatbelt and put the car on drive, off to get out the side road. Before you do, you took one last look at the café and the flower shop. All that time spent, and for what, exactly?

You sigh. The wheel turns with your hand and you continue on driving, starting your journey to the airport. It wasn't a perfect day. Well, obviously, but the weather isn't perfect either. The sun shone down on you, burning up everything in its view outside while you pulled down the sun visor and turned the ac up.

It's hard not to get lost in thought as you made your way to the airport, your mind walking back to every memory, and every question you have unanswered. Is this how you're always gonna feel? Maybe so. Maybe not. But what were you supposed to do about it?

Nearly every scenery of this town that once had your heart beating of affection now doesn't even make it pulse at all. It stings, even dead, like the flower that was around it, grew thorns. You take a deep breath, trying to focus on the road.

Being in the love blackout already had you overthinking every little thing and wondering what exactly you've done wrong for Wanda to act so different, but it wasn't really you. It was her. Though, even with finding out about the new information, it didn't make things better. Of course, only worse.

Was it something you didn't do? Was it something you did? Or perhaps just a simple fall out of love. You should've known. Should've seen the signs. You didn't even want to think about it, but you can't help it. Did she leave her house in the middle of the night only for you to welcome her home? Did she gift someone else something while you got her flowers? Was she kissing another's lips while you sat there in the corner of the café, waiting for her?

You hear your phone making noise with notifications, one after another. You know it's Wanda, and your fingers twitch to reach out and grab it, but you don't pick up. Instead, you quickly put your hand out to silence your phone. If you didn't, or if you took any action that was opposite of that, you'd have turned the car around already.

You notice your vision getting blurry with tears, but you blink them away, needing to focus on the road ahead. You sigh when you stop at a red light, having time to wipe your eyes with your hands. The frustration only fueled your way forwards.

Getting drunk on New Year's Day, that was all just a ruse. Who knows if that wine was even hers that she bought. Maybe it was given by another. You would rest your head on your steering wheel by now in utter exhaustion and willingness to surrender to the unavoiding pit of pure darkness if you didn't have to keep your eyes on the road.

Another thought that distracted you from everything, was if you should call Carol. She'd probably wonder where you've gone and worry. But you decided you'll call her later.

An hour or two passes by and eventually the wheels of your car rolls up to the front entrance of the airport, the scattered crowds of people carrying luggages and trolleys making it a stark contrast from crowds outside of the airport.

Your eyes don't linger for too long, but your ears undeniably catch the PA announcer speaking, although New York was only mentioned once and it wasn't your flight. You continue on driving, getting through the many other cars sitting at the pickup site to go down to the basement, where the parking lot is.

It was packed, but not entirely. Passing by, you see shiny fresh cars, normal looking cars, and old dusty abandoned ones left by someone for some type of reason. You hoped your car doesn't end up like that, but you had no reason to let it sit in a parking lot for years. Soon, you found a small empty corner to slot your car into, easily going in.

The engine shuts down with the touch of your fingers and you get out, grabbing your bags and going over to the two-door entrance where the elevator was. Some people were there, but you try your best to simply stand and wait. Lucky you went in right as the elevator was about to arrive to the floor.

The airport lights were bright and blinding when the elevator doors open, making you squint your eyes and blink, but also remembering to step out and go over to the register section, grabbing your ticket.

Seeing as you got here early, your flight wasn't until an hour later, so you decide to roam the airport to get some breakfast first. Outside held plenty of restaurants and cafés though, so you went there.

You grabbed some breakfast from a café that caught your eyes, and sat down at the bench outside. It was pretty empty here, since most people were either at the entrance or the other side of the airport-- there, holding the more popular restaurants.

You were just about to grab your meal and take a bite after getting some liquid in your body when you feel a drop of water land on the skin of your hand.

Confused, your eyebrows furrowed as you look closer at it, the water rolling down your hand when you tilted it. You looked around to find nothing. Then the skies started to grow darker, the sun getting covered up by the clouds.

The rain came pouring down quickly after building up, making everyone else scramble to the entrance of the airport, it having a roof.

Meanwhile, a stranger somewhere at the parking lots was just stepping out their car when the rain came down. They go back in urgently, but only to grab an umbrella.

You were standing up from the bench and covering your head with your arms, about to do the same as most of the other people were doing. Running to shelter. Then, suddenly the raindrops on you stop.

Feeling the rain disappear, you slowly put down your arms and see a redhead beside you, holding an umbrella above the two of you to shield from the rain.

She didn't look at you for long, having turned her head to the airport entrance. Not wanting to get left behind, although you were sure you won't considering she had put the umbrella over you, you still quickly walk with her.

"Thank you," you say, chuckling a little as the coolness of the airport hits you combined with the rain drops on you, sending a shiver down your spine. You shove your hands in your pockets as she closes the umbrella.

"Of course." She said gently, her voice husky as she nods. Afterwards, nothing much happened. She had walked away, nearly in a hurry with her eyes focused on the big flight screen in the middle of the airport, but it wasn't entirely obvious unless you were staring closely at her. You guessed she was either late for her flight or was just trying to get to her area fast. A kind encounter with a stranger...at least there's one good thing for today.

You check the screen yourself, and your eyes searched for your own journey. When you didn't find it, you searched more panickly, until you restart from the top and it pops up. But it wasn't in its original place. Then, you go off to the side and see a bright red text gleaming with the word, 'DELAYED'.

Great. Now you have to wait longer. A bad thing right after the good thing. You sigh, but make your way to the sitting area anyway, going through security with ease.

Once you've gone to the section your plane would arrive...in a few hours. You sat down, sliding your phone out from your pocket and pulling up your direct messages with Kate, telling her you'll be late because of your flight.

After an hour passed of you being bored, scrolling on your phone and opening an app only to close it, mixed with overthinking while resting your head on your folded arms, a message finally pops up, and your fingers quickly tap on it.

Kate replied back with some film recommendations and videos of Lucky doing tricks and getting excited at the mention of your name, making you smile.

You guessed she was driving when you messaged her, but you didn't mind it, and watch the things she sent you.

It keeps you occupied for a long while, up until you forgot about time, but the sound of your plane arriving quickly reminded you.

You look up to the large windows at the side that showed the huge parking area of the airplanes. There were small cars along with someone holding red sticks to direct the plane.

Many eyes in the large room was watching everything go by, the vehicle holding all the passenger luggages, the people from that flight getting out. You guessed they were clearing it out and starting to clean up.

The other eyes in the room weren't even looking at all, focused on their phones, laptops, or simply their eyelids were closed in sleep. Most of them had probably been in an airport plenty of times to not be mesmerized by the movements and sound. Or doing work...or is simply tired.

You had enough time to finish up your movie before your plane was ready to board, making you gather your things and stand up, having finished your breakfast hours ago.

It didn't take much time to get in, easily going through the little portable hallway connected to the plane and letting the attendant check your ticket.

After finding your seat, you store your things in the compartment above, then settle down, buckling in the seatbelt. The seat beside you was empty up until a few minutes later, someone sitting in it. They did the same movements as you, but rather than watching the view out the window, they bring out a book, placing it in their lap as the plane started moving, having made sure everyone settled down and was seated.

You put on some music on your earphones and got ready for the journey ahead. It was only two hours to New York from where you were, but still you hoped it'll feel short. Maybe you'll get some sleep on the way.

|——————————— ➳ ———————————|

The plane soon landed once more, the turbulance actually smoother than most of the other ones you've gone through. The person beside you on the other hand, put the book they were reading down and grabbed onto their armchair.

You didn't pay much attention to it, more mesmerized by the tall buildings you can already see in the distance. You've been here plenty of times before to visit Kate, but the view was still stunning.

After the plane settled in its parking spot completely, you unbuckle your seatbelt and get up, just as everyone else, grabbing your bag and walking out.

A text to Kate was sent of your arrival. The walk felt longer than the flight as you made your way through security and up to the pickup site, where she was already waiting, your eyes quickly catching the familiar sight of the car and license plate.

You load the empty trunk of the car with your bags, then walk back to the front. The door opens with the pull of your hand, inside revealing the raven haired girl looking over to you with a gentle smile as you went in.

"Hey," She greeted, her voice soft and lightly pitched as she started moving the car out the side, both to get you two home and let the other cars pick someone else up.

"Hi. Sorry for being late," You say as you set your handheld bag down, buckling in your seatbelt as Kate's eyes flicker to you for a moment before focusing on the road again.

"Don't worry. It was pouring here." She goes to make a turn, getting out of the airport area and into the main road.

"I'm just glad you're safe," She says. A smile tugs up on the corners of your lips, your heart warming. Kate was always a caring, lighthearted and comforting person. No wonder you've been feeling so low...other than for obvious reasons. Calls and messages are never enough to capture the blanket feeling of being beside someone like that.

On the way, Kate asks a few questions and jokes here and there, catching up with you. There was a conversation needed to be talked about for sure, but she knows to save it for later, when you get more comfortable.

The rest of the journey to Kate's place was quiet, the silence only filled with the humming of the car and the music she put on. Your eyes watch the modern city buildings pass by. The sidewalks and roads were shining with the sheen of water, the rain having met it earlier.

It was only 4 pm, but you had a sort of sleepiness creeping up on you, perhaps from the mental, emotional and physical exhaustion mixed together. Kate notices, seeing how your eyes were too relaxed to count as just being calm. But she doesn't say anything, knowing you still wouldn't be able to fall asleep.

The car comes to a stop, making you snap out of being zoned out. Kate was gathering her things and turning off the engine of the car, moving to get out. Then you realize you had arrived at her apartment.

Your eyes go over the building as you got out the car, slamming the door closed...accidentally. Your eyes widen slightly and you grimace, looking at Kate, who had her mouth open in an O shape.

"Someone's really angry," she jokes, grabbing a plastic bag from the backseat. You gave a tight-lipped smile and went to the back of the car.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to," you quickly spew out your apology. The first hour you were with your best friend again, and you slam her car door. You grabbed your bags that were safely sitting in the trunk as she made her way to you.

"It's alright," she laughs, stepping in front of you while you slung your backpack over your shoulder. She held out a pack of dog treats to you while her other hand still held the plastic bag of groceries.

"Here." She puts out her hand further when you didn't take it, thinking you hadn't noticed. Then you look down and see what it is, your eyebrows furrowing in thought within your dazed mind.

You gasp when you realize it. "I get to feed Lucky?" You ask, your face brightening as you look back up at her. She nods, a smile on her face. You quietly cheer as she made her way to her apartment, her keys rattling in her hand as you followed behind her.

The door opens with a click, and instantly, you hear the sounds of a gentle bark and running coming from Lucky, having arrived at the front door quickly to meet the two of you.

"Hey, buddy." Kate holds the door with her body, leaning down slightly to card her fingers through Lucky's fur.

"Look. Look, it's Y/N." She points to you, making the golden dog run to you, jumping as he went. You smile and kneel down, greeting him as he started licking your face. Kate watches the excitement of Lucky from the door, a fond gaze on the two of you.

"Okay, okay. I've missed you, too. Let's get inside now," you manage to say in between laughs, standing up. You went in with Lucky staring up at the pack of treats in your hand, lightly pawing at it with his tongue sticking out his mouth.

"Wait, I need to put my stuff down first." You pull back the pack of dog treats away from him while Kate closes the door. You can see the impatience he tried to cover with a look of calmness, but you know he would jump on you if he needed to get the treats.

You kick off your shoes and set down your bags in the bedroom you usually sit in whenever you visit Kate, Lucky following you around and circling playfully around you at times.

"He's really missed you," Kate says with a laugh, putting her grocery bag on the kitchen counter to unload and store the contents into her fridge and cabinets.

"I can see that," you say quietly, focused on opening the bags and putting food in his food bowl. Before setting it down on the floor though, you hand feed him a treat, patting his head with your other hand gently as he instantly ate it.

"As much as I would love to play around with him though, I should probably go change and shower." You say, having set down Lucky's food bowl, giving him one last longing pat and standing back up.

"Do you wanna watch a movie when you're done?" Kate asks, turning to look at you as she got done storing everything.

"Yeah...I probably need it anyway. You can choose." You say with a nod, and Kate watches you go to your bedroom, off to get yourself cleaned up, unpack, and unwind. She knew exactly what you were saying, and her heart ached just a little at the mere thought of your troubled mind.

You close the door behind you, taking a deep breath in once you were inside, letting it out as a heavy sigh after, walking to your bags to slide the zipper open.

Everything seemed to hit you all at once, your shoulders feeling heavy as it moves along with your hand to grab your clothes. You go to the bathroom, fatigue within your movements as you close the door, pull off your clothes, and turn on the shower.

The warm water running down your skin welcomes you, letting you relax a bit and your muscles letting go of its tensions. The steam filling up a bit of your breathing from the shower makes your body feel comforted, the barely noticeable movement of it going to everything that was glass in the bathroom, fogging it up.

A gentle yawn leaves your mouth, finally feeling the exhaustion take you over. But you still had some energy within you, so you willed yourself to clean yourself up and wash your hair, then turning off the shower once you were done.

You dry yourself off, then put on your clothes. When you were about to go walk out the bathroom though, you had a thought and turn on the sink for a quick second, splashing your face with cold water before drying your face with your towel once more. Now you were a little more awake.

You get out of the bathroom, parts of your hair dripping slightly. Since you already had your clothes on, you decide to unpack everything else, storing your shirts and pants in the closet.

Your eyes flicker to the bed, and the urge to fall into it was strong, but you hold yourself back. If you went into bed by now, you knew you probably wouldn't be able to get up anytime soon.

Once you've dealt with unpacking, you put your bags off somewhere in a corner of the room and move to the door, getting out the bedroom. Out in the living room, you see Kate, already sat down on the couch with a movie set up on the tv. She notices you and looks up.

"Hey. I made us some fries and nuggets." She gestures her hand towards the plates of fries and nuggets accompanied with sauce, making the smallest smile cross your face.

You sit down next to her, grabbing a few and taking a bite, the crunch sounding out as she looked at you eating, resisting a smile when you hummed in delight.

You shift your position on the couch, getting comfortable while Lucky jumped up, laying beside you, only to then move to lay on both of your lap and Kate's, but his head was on your side, making her shake her head at her dog's antics.

Your eyes focus on the screen when Kate hits play, one of your hands patting Lucky's head and traveling down to his body fur while the other one grabs the chicken nuggets and fries.

Kate gently pokes your shoulder multiple times, making you turn to look at her. She had fries in between her teeth and mouth, sauce sitting on the end of it for extra effect of blood, looking like a vampire's fangs. Instantly, you giggle, to which turn to laughs when one of the fries fell, leaving only one in her mouth.

She laughs herself, and quickly go to retrieve the fallen french fry. Although, right as her fingers held it, Lucky had moved and turned to her side, chomping on the fry. Kate grabs the fry in her mouth, eating that before he could try to steal it from her too.

"Hey! That's not yours." She exclaimed, but Lucky only looked at her innocently, licking her face for a moment, probably asking for more. She laughed, but gently push him away, needing to see the tv too.

"You're lucky you're cute." She shakes her head when Lucky had stopped, and settled down in your laps again.

"He's not just Pizza Dog anymore." You start, and she turns her head to look at you, the both of you having something in your heads.

"French Fry Dog," you say simultaneously, the sound of your voices mixing together along with your soft laughs afterwards. Lucky only tilts his head, confused of the sudden sounds from the two of you.

You focus back on the movie, getting invested in the story. The nuggets and fries were slowly going down to an empty plate, counted as snacks for the movie, but still filling up your stomach. The day had transitioned into nighttime now, time going by quickly.

When Lucky moved to settle beside Kate instead, probably needing a new position just as you did, you move to lay down, your head on the armrest and your arm dangling off the couch. At some times of the movie, you space out, your mind occupied with thoughts.

Kate's eyes were completely on the tv, comfortable and fully focused on the story. Your eyes flicker over to her for a split second before returning to the screen, your teeth sinking into your bottom lip.

"Kate?" You whisper, barely even within the sound volume of a breath. She hums and looks over to you, your body seeming weak against the couch. Lucky was now sleeping beside her.

"What if it doesn't get better?" Your eyes travel down to the floor, not meeting her eyes. Her eyebrows furrow at the suddenness of your sentence, and she sits up more properly.

Having felt the change in your demeanor, Kate quickly pauses the movie, putting all her attention on you. "Don't say that," She counters in a gentle tone.

"You'll get through it. You always have," She says, her voice a soothing sound through the night air. The crickets make noise in the background, having replaced the sounds of the movie now that it was paused.

"Do you think it was me?" You whisper, sitting up because your cheek was starting to get sore from resting against the armrest. You fiddle with your fingers and look at her as Kate quickly shakes her head.

"No. You've stayed through it with her in the worst of times and the best." She takes in how you fiddled with your fingers, a hint to your dark mind. A small gentle, although bit of a sad smile goes over her face as she thought of the softness of your heart.

"Everyone has their mistakes but after all this time I've known you, I think you have been so brave and just...such an amazing person." She says, knowing the many gestures of gifts and time and reassurances you've done before, both to strangers and people you know.

"The point is..." She takes a breath, trying to find the right words to say. She wanted to tread carefully, not wanting to accidentally say something wrong. You watch as she thinks, her words sinking into your mind.

"Don't blame yourself," She finally says, looking directly into your eyes to make sure you heard her completely and isn't lost in your head as she said it.

"The love was there, but you reached the end of it," she points out, unfaltering in her honesty, but her voice was gentle. The truth was, it was doomed from the start. You had it in the back of your head all the time. But there seemed to be such a high chance of it coming out alive from the beginning. Yet, all that was a simple trick your minds put on.

"But why did she...do that?" You ask hesitantly, your heart pained with cracks. You knew people did the things they wanted to, with a reason or not. But this was different. Kate purses her lips, a sigh leaving her mouth.

"Honestly, I'm not who you should be asking..." Kate says with a soft chuckle, a tinge of the sound having a nervous tone, but she needed to help you get out than dig yourself deeper.

"But maybe she didn't want to hurt you," She says with a gentle shrug. Her mind worried it was a bad thing to put out, but she sees your shoulders slumping in defeat.

"...But it did anyway." You sigh. It'll always hurt. Whether you'd like to admit it or not, no matter the ways its done in. She had nothing to say to that.

The two of you sit in quiet silence for a minute, needing the break to think. Lucky shifted slightly in his sleep, and Kate gently puts her fingers through his fur before looking at you once more, seeing your gaze lost in a haze of your thoughts.

"Now, come here." She lets go of Lucky and slowly pushes herself off the couch with her hands, standing up and turning to you. You raise your eyebrows at her, curious of her next moves.

"You're desperately in need of...a teddy bear hug!" She gently tugs on your arm, pulling you up to stand.

"Aw, no!" You joked with a chuckle as you get pulled into her embrace, her arms squeezing you tightly as if you were simply a plushie.

You hug her back though, relishing in the tight yet comforting embrace of her arms. Your body relaxed, feeling the weight on your shoulders slowly disappearing just slightly.

"Thank you." You say under your breath, pulling away from her. She slides her hands into her pockets, giving you a reassuring smile.

"It's what I'm here for." She said quietly with a nod, her eyes traveling over to the clock. Her mind jumps to the memory where you seemed sleepy, right in the car earlier.

"You should get some rest. Have you slept at all ever since you went to the airport?" She asks, nudging your shoulder with her knuckles. A faint thought of you in your worst times went through her mind just for a moment.

"No...but--" You look over to the tv screen, seeing you had just a quarter left to finish of the movie.

"Go," Kate says gently yet slightly sternly in a whisper, cutting you off. Lucky was already sleeping. She was still energized, but she could go to sleep at any time at the moment. Kate was just more concerned about you, hating to see you avoid taking care of yourself.

You look at her for a moment longer, your eyes flicking over to Lucky to think it over before giving in, your head moving in a gentle nod.

She gives you an encouraging smile, letting you go to your bedroom. As you did so, she started cleaning up, getting the plates from earlier and putting them in the sink. When she hears your bedroom door close, was when she could have her heart get just a tad lighter.

You make your way to your bed and turn the dim lights on, falling into bed easily. A sigh leaves your mouth, and you wanted to spill out your feelings, but all that was more on your mind was sleep.

The mattress was soft, and you wanted to sink into it, yet still, your head falls asleep after minutes of tossing and turning while the night delved deeper into a form of comfort.

|——————————— ᗢ ———————————|

Wanda, on the other hand, hasn't been sleeping at all. She kept thinking over the memories of the past few months. It was like a contest of who can act like they can care less. At first. Then, she saw your efforts and got guilty, wanting to isolate herself instead.

The day you were waiting at the café. She was going to actually have lunch with you. But the person she was with had convinced her to stay. Her heart screamed no, but her mind was far from it. She was already falling out of love with you, so what could it hurt?

It seemed like the right thing at the time for her, and it was easier for her to put the blame on herself than making you overthink about the smallest things and make yourself the villain instead. She didn't want to hurt you. Your heart was the softest she's seen. But she only ended up hurting you further. It was a situation that only had loss.

Then, the birthday was an actual mistake.

She thought it'd be nice to get a day off to herself...and with another, hoping you'll still believe that she was at work, although the both of you had doubted it by that point already. But she actually forgot.

Your past, she knows. How many people you've drifted off from and never really got one to stay or even stayed yourself. Then you met her, who was struggling to believe how anyone could love her. And you decided to stay. For once, you poured your whole heart into it because you promised yourself not to run anymore. For once, she had someone in her life that truly cared for her.

And she did that.

Her legs curl further into her body, the bed being colder than the nights before. Was this what you felt whenever you slept alone and she was off doing whatever?

Her chest caves in and her heart gives up, the walls whispering back to her of her quiet cries.

end of chapter 6. <3

Series Masterlist <- Chapter 5 Chapter 7 ->

----------------

taglist <3 - join here! :]

@ludasgf @lovelyy-moonlight @red1culous @justanotherteenpoet @fxckmiup @dmenby3100 @natashasilverfox @wandsmxmff @tia-thesimp @marvelwomen-simp @may-z3 @natsbiggestfan1 @fawnedolly @animealways

[almacambiondaughterofsaleos]

Octavia Is Sidelined So Much In Favor Of Stolitz

Despite being used as an example of how Stolas is really a good person and father, I do notice overtime her importance in the series has dwindled. Seriously, despite how the narrative wants us to think she is the treasured jewel of his life the execution would have you say that her father is more distracted by his boy toy due to how Vivziepoop has overemphasized the Stolitz ship.

Take for example is "Seeing Stars" where he neglects his daughter and breaks his promise to see the event he promised years ago, because he's so wrapped up in his divorce and even goes to insult her mother in front of her (even though he's said in the past he's tried to shield his daughter from the ugly parts of his and Stella's relationship). However, now that he's divorcing he doesn't hesitate to be as ugly with Stella as possible which shows how really good of a father he is. Also when she goes missing despite saying that Blitzo's dick isn't enough to quell Stolas's anger when it's his daughter is involved... well it actually goes like that, because both Blitzo and Stolas can't help but flirt and be flustered around each other this whole episode. Instead of focusing on his daughter, he again is on Blitzo's dick and even worse his daughter has to forgive him for neglecting her.

Most egregious one of the them is at the end of "Western Energy" where we have the emphasis on how this affects Stolas and Blitzo's relationships especially those texts talking about their fall about Ozzie's. However, we never get focus on how Octavia felt after her father fucking almost bit the dust, because in the next episode that Stolas is in he's okay and again you would think he would be injured a bit more to show how serious Striker is. But nope due to Vivziepoop remembering he's a powerful demon, he recovers in a day and we don't see Octavia at least be escorted to the hospital to see him because again Octavia is only there when she's a tool to make him look better and not her own character.

And now we get to the music video of "Just Look My Way" where Octavia's mentions in it are scrubbed in favor of Blitzo which again shows how the narrative is favoring his boy toy over his own fucking daughter who is supposed to be the center of his world and not this person he's given up so much for. Seriously, it's why if Octavia appears again I will not take the narrative seriously because we know that despite all claims that her father will get distracted from being a parent and ogle over Blitzo because he's a selfish pos and yet Octavia will be the one who has to learn to tolerate his bs because he's got the author's favoritism.

I really at the first thought that Stolas relationship with his daughter was sweet, but then I realize like so many else it really lost it's potential once you realize that Octavia is just a prop to artificially make it seem like Stolas is a good father when in actuality he's selfishly putting her needs above hers in a situation he caused. And it's a result of the fact that the writers are just using her as a writing tool and not a full character. She isn't needed until it affects Stolas and even then the Stolitz ship zaps everything around it so that any attention that Octavia is taken away. In a way, Octavia's fears were justified her father would run off and leave her because the writers are.

[zweiginator]

give us more of forbidden love au patrick!!!

here is the link to the last part, in case anyone needs their memory refreshed!

cw: talk about unwanted pregnancy, abortion

patrick lifts his head from the dashboard; it feels like all his blood rushed to his brain but he still can't think. doesn't know what to say or how to make you feel better. because he feels like shit. and he feels awful because you're going through this too, and so much worse than he is--but how could you keep this from him for so fucking long?

his temples ache, and patrick rubs them with the pads of his fingers. his palms are clammy so he wipes them on his legs.

"are you serious?" patrick asks. it's all he can think to ask. maybe just to get it out of the way. for him to realize he isn't dreaming and this is real and here you are with his baby, gestating in your body.

"yes, i am." you want to yell at him. but you know it wouldn't do any good. how could he ask you that? why doesn't he fucking care to hug you or tell you it's going to be okay? it's hard to look him in the eye, but you do it.

"do you want to keep it?"

there isn't a bite to his words and you can tell he's genuinely asking. he doesn't know what to do, how this will look. well, he knows it will look fucking horrible. given how adamant both your and patrick's fathers have been about despising the other. it was ingrained into you, programmed from a young age, like a chore that didn't make sense but had to be done nonetheless.

it's either a scandal for patrick knocking you up out of wedlock, or a scandal when they find out you chose not to keep the baby. there's only a tiny sliver of a possibility that it can stay completely out of the public eye. and, maybe it's possible, given how both sides have an interest in keeping it hushed. except the media doesn't. and neither of you are even sure they're not there now, snapping pictures, or waiting to ask for inside scoop, sliding the woman at the front desk a fifty dollar bill.

"i don't--no."

"you don't know?"

"no, i dont want to keep it." you say, softly. meekly. patrick has never seen you look so helpless.

he looks at your stomach. obviously, it doesn't look any different. but a tinge of melancholic guilt stings his chest like an electric shock. to think about a baby, his baby growing inside you.

but you're both too young. stupid to think you were immune to the natural order of the world. why didn't patrick use a fucking condom?

"this shouldn't have happened. the baby." you mutter, looking up at patrick. a tear falls onto your nose and patrick wipes it with his thumb.

"i know, i'm sorry." he mumbles.

"what do you think we should do?"

"it's not my choice to make."

it's frustrating to you how patrick isn't taking a stance. isn't being a fucking man and telling you how he feels, what the plan should be. you roll your eyes.

"can you just--say something? you're acting like a fucking robot."

"it's--" patrick groans. "i'm not going to tell you what to do with your body. i know it's my baby too--but i don't know. i think if you don't want to keep it then don't."

but you weren't so sure. neither of you were. you had been ready to talk to patrick about abortion, gung ho about not wanting a baby at this point in your life. but a sadness hung in the air that wasn't there before you brought up that word.

"maybe we think about it. for a little longer." patrick tucks a strand of hair behind your ear.

you sniffle and nod your head.

"your family will hate me."

"yours already hates me."

and weirdly enough, you both felt as if you could take a full breath after admitting maybe you did want the baby. the hard part would be hiding it, and eventually, finding a way to break the news not only to your family, but to your whole fucking city as well.

[nobodyfamousposts]

My-Crack-Ulous: Norm 2

For Norm, most of his time with Lila was spent studying up on the events of the past few years and the current state of Paris in order to get up to date. 

For Lila, most of her time with Norm was spent trying to find the perfect way to make her wishes so they wouldn’t keep backfiring.

Which was hilarious to Norm, since her attempts only made things worse.

“One of these wishes is bound to work!” Lila insisted, starting to look almost as haggard and unhinged as a certain crock-pot.

Norm rolled his eyes.

Geez, he was just kind of insulted by this point. One would think after the first two wishes going completely wrong that the wish-maker would put one and two together and give up by that third wish.

Here Lila Rossi was a good hundred or so wishes PAST that magic number and she was STILL insisting that Ladybug and Dupain-Cheng—who totally aren’t the same person wink wink—were responsible for turning her wishes against her. Somehow, for the girl who liked to think she was so ingenious, she hasn’t figured out that it was his own magic screwing with her.

Honestly, he was kind of insulted. It was like she didn’t even KNOW him!

…which she didn’t, now that he thought about it. He’d barely gotten out that he was a genie before she started on the wishing. 

Not like he was going to do anything to change that, though, but still! He felt kind of used. Maybe he should talk to her about it? She was still young—only a teenager and probably deserved a chance to learn and grow or something.

…nah.

“You’re doing great, kid.” He said blithely as he looked over a news article instead.

Apparently Dimmsdale had vanished from the face of the Earth as far as he could find, so either Turner had done something or he was in an entirely different dimension. Either way, twerp was gone and not his problem.

Thus, he instead used his time wisely—or at least more wisely than his new victim at any rate. As such, he decided to take the time to learn about how things worked before he tried to mess around too much. Particularly regarding these heroes and the whole “Hawk Moth” deal. Maybe he should have tried more to get in touch with that guy, but given some of those “akumas” he’d been making….yeah, no, Norm was better off staying out of that.

Though the Miraculous seemed familiar. He could swear he encountered them before. Hadn’t he known a guy? Cat guy? 

Eh, it was a while ago. Probably nothing.

He picked up the next random reading material in the pile and…ooh, a magazine. He ignored Lila muttering to herself while looking over the magazine and…wow, this blond kid really was everywhere, wasn’t he?

Creepy. Seriously, was he the only one kind of weirded out over the hyped up over focus on a 14 year old? 

No? Just him?

Lila glared at him. Part of her was tempted to try and demand answers, but that would be admitting there was some issue. And there was none!

She was fine! Perfect, in fact! Now she had her own genie and magic to influence the world with! The only problem was she couldn’t use it on Ladybug.

Clearly, this was Ladybug’s fault. She must be doing SOMETHING to interfere with her new magic!

Typical. She just couldn’t let Lila have anything good. Not Adrien. Not fame. Not even the crushing defeat of her enemies.

But Lila would prevail—oh yes! All she had to do was find the right wish to get everything she deserved!

"Soon." She muttered with a smirk. "Soon..."

____________________

I wish everyone, including Ladybug, believed I was her best friend!"

Three days later and nothing.

Ladybug didn't come to visit her. She didn't interact with her outside of battles. Or even IN battles except to tell her to stay out of the battles. And nobody new was cozying up to Lila in a way that would suggest they were under the effects of her wish.

"What gives?!" She demanded to Norm, finally having enough of waiting. Though to be fair, Lila had never been very patient. "Why isn't Ladybug being friendly with me?"

She glared at the picture of the superhero on her computer. No updates. No news. Nothing out of character. And no sign of even caring about Lila the way she should!

"If Ladybug thought I was her best friend, shouldn't she be friendly towards me? Hell, she should be spilling her identity to me by now!”

Norm, being rather bored by this point, shrugged. Truthfully, even he didn't know for sure why the superhero remained unchanged, but he had a few gueses.

"Well, your wish didn't take into account who Ladybug is."

"What is THAT supposed to mean?!" She demanded.

He sighed. "Kid, your wish made Ladybug think you were her best friend. The only reason she wouldn't tell you her identity would be because she wouldn't tell her own non-wish-influenced best friend her identity."

"Shouldn't she have trusted me with a Miraculous at least?" She questioned.

"Not if Ladybug was understandably ticked off that her "best friend" would claim a connection between them to the world for popularity and decide she's not trustworthy or a true friend." Norm replied. People don't always stay best friends, after all. And while the wish may have made Ladybug think Lila was her best friend in the moment, all the OTHER things Lila had done would likely sour that quickly.

So ultimately, a waste of a wish.

Then of course, came the other problem of that wish…

“Tell us who Ladybug is or else!” Demanded the scarred and nasty-looking man, knife in hand and pointed directly at Lila.

Lila, who had been kidnapped from school that afternoon by this thug and his followers, tied to a chair, and interrogated on the one thing she would already have told everyone had she known!

“I don’t know!” Lila insisted.

“Bullshit! You’re her best friend!”

“As Ladybug! She hasn’t told me her true identity!”

Another thug scoffed. “What kind of best friend are ya, then?”

She glared at him in outrage.

Fortunately for her, that moment was interrupted as an akuma chose that time to slam through a wall a la a certain American meme.

“Lila Rossi!”

The thugs screamed in fear and either scattered or were knocked over by the falling wall. The few who remained were quickly taken care of with a zap or three from the akuma’s wand.

Thank goodness!

“Finally! It’s about time—”

But the akuma gave her no further time to speak, instead pointing his wand at her and glaring ominously.

“Tell us who Ladybug is or else.”

Lila stared.

Was the akuma serious? Was Hawk Moth serious? They were allies! He should know she isn’t actually Ladybug’s friend or anything close to an ally, so why was he sending the akuma after her?

…oh.

Oh right. The wish she made was for “Everyone”. And that included Hawk Moth, too.

“NORM!”

____________________

“I wish Ladybug would be crushed by an akuma!”

One hour later... Lila watched, seething in rage through binoculars as the akuma "Lady-Fan”, Ladybug’s apparent “#1 Fan” was taking Ladybug on a rather lovely date to a high scale restaurant the likes of which Lila herself couldn't get into.

Even Hawk Moth appeared none-too-pleased given the illuminated mask around the akuma’s face—not that the akuma herself even noticed, only having eyes for Ladybug and not about to let anything stand between her and some one-on-one time with her favorite hero.

Which would be sweet…to anyone who wasn’t Lila.

“Norm, undo it!”

Norm looked up from a movie—the Ladybug movie of all things.

“You sure you wanna use a wish on this? It’s an akuma. It’ll just be resolved on its own.”

“UnDO it. NOW.”

He sighed and snapped his fingers.

With a poof, Ladybug was suddenly alone with a very much no-longer-akumatized fan…but still in the restaurant—and since no Lucky Charm had been used, the two apparently decided to continue with their “hangout”.

Lila glared.

“There. Happy?” Norm asked.

“No! Not until Ladybug is destroyed!” Lila shouted, seemingly uncaring to the potential of anyone nearby being able to hear her.

Norm rolls his eyes before turning back to his movie with a shake of his head and a mutter about a waste of a wish.

[thriftedtchotchkes]

piece of me

pairing: younger!mike schmidt & baby!abby schmidt

summary: at 22 years old, mike is given custody of his infant sister after the loss of their parents. though he might not ever truly feel worthy of her, there's one thing he'll always be certain of—they belong together.

warnings: pre-fnaf movie au, inspired by the official movie novel, loss of parents, mentions of depression and anxiety, childhood trauma

word count: <1k

Mike never asked for this.

As his tiny sister reaches for him from her playpen, his first instinct is to wait for their mom to pick her up and give her the attention she needs. But their mom isn't here anymore. Neither is their dad.

It's just Mike and Abby now, and he has no idea what to do in a situation like this. The longer she makes grabby hands in his direction, the more upset she gets, but he feels like he can't move. He's frozen, riddled with guilt because he already knows he can't help her.

Mike isn't equipped for this. He's not ready for this.

Kids were never on the agenda, if there was ever an agenda to begin with. The horrible truth is that he can't be trusted with that kind of responsibility. He already proved that a long time ago. With Garret.

The thought alone is so painful, he pushes it to the back of his mind to preserve his own sanity. Right now, it's just another reminder of how much of a fuck-up he is. A failure of a big brother, destined to destroy yet another little life. And this time has the potential to be so much worse.

Abby's barely 11 months old, which means he actually has to raise her. Between long shifts at a dead-end job, he'll have to teach her how to walk and talk and read. Buy her diapers, her toys and clothes, her formula. She's not even old enough for solid food, for fuck's sake.

She needs her mom. Instead, she's stuck with him—her shitty older brother who's still glued to the couch, incompetent as ever. She's not crying at least, so it's not an emergency—yet. But her little button nose is starting to scrunch up, and that's never a good sign.

Another moment passes as they continue to watch each other, stuck at an impasse only Mike has the power to end, if only he could just fucking move. But before he can convince his limbs to cooperate, Abby's hands drop to the wooden slats of her pen like she's finally given up. Her bottom lip wobbles dangerously, and his chest seizes in panic.

Okay, now it's an emergency. Now, he has to do something. Tears well up in her eyes, and she hiccups around what he assumes is the first of many sobs to come. What is he supposed to do? How does he stop this? When no solution comes, he feels his palpitating heart break—for both of them.

Because Mike is lying to himself.

Deep down, he knows what she wants, but he's too scared of the consequences of giving in. Just pick her up. Just hold her. But he can't. He doesn't want her to get attached. It'll only make it that much harder when he inevitably lets her down and they take her away from him. Maybe they should. What kind of monster refuses to comfort a crying child?

From the outside looking in, he's sure his actions—or lack thereof—seem cruel. They'd never know his throat is starting to constrict or that his head is filled with so much white noise, it's impeding his capacity for logical thought, or any thought at all. He wishes he was a more capable man. A better man. But he's broken. From the outside or not, anyone can see that.

Except for Abby. What must she see when she looks at him? Babies, especially ones as perceptive as her, are supposed to be able to sense tumultuous emotions, so why doesn't that explain the way she's looking at him right now? Like he's familiar, like she knows he's family. Like he's her world.

Their eyes lock, and suddenly it's like he's looking in a mirror. The same brown irises and dark, curly hair. Their father's nose and their mother's smile. If he wanted to, he could see that smile again. It's been a long time since it graced his own face, but if he just picked her up. If he just held her.

An unexpected wave of clarity washes over him. This responsibility wasn't forced on him. He chose this, to care for her and provide her with a happier life than she would've had with their cold, money-hungry aunt.

He chose to raise her because regardless of how ill-equipped he is to be a parent, she deserves to be loved, and he will always be able to give her that. And when she reaches out her tiny hand again with hope in her tear-filled, brown eyes, he realizes she's choosing him, too.

Mike never asked for this. But as he lifts Abby into his arms and cradles her against his chest, he knows in his heart that this is where she's meant to be.

thanks for reading!

divider by @saradika-graphics

[ninyard]

You're thinking of him going to class the first day after the trial - but what about all the day before the trial even began? When none of his classmates had any idea what happened or what could have happened or why he did it? All they knew was that he killed someone with an exy stick (if even that). And given that he's Andrews twin - Andrew who /was/ in juvie for being to aggressive - what's to say that Aaron isn't the same? What,now they have two homicidal on their campus but they are also on the deranged exy team? I cant imagine what that would have been like

Oh lord.

Like the thought of Aaron sitting in his last class of the day the day before the trial watching the time tick down and he’s felt sick to his stomach for weeks now, but it’s so much worse now that it’s so close. He can barely sit still, he’s been driving Katelyn crazy for days, let’s do this, let’s go here, let’s go there, let’s keep my mind busy so I can’t think about the fact I might be going to prison next week.

The time ticks down, and he knows he’s not going to sleep that night, and he sees the way his classmates look at him. How heads turned when one of his curious friends asked how he was feeling about everything. He can’t look them in the eyes when he says everything’s fine.

But it’s not just him, it’s not just his classmates, it’s everyone. Everyone is making him feeling fucking weird. All of his teammates are skirting around this massive elephant in the room, people are avoiding talking to him in case the trial comes up. Coach looks at him with pity. Abby looks at him like he’s a helpless lamb. Betsy sends her encouragement and kindness but she knows better than anyone what’s coming.

Aaron knows Andrew has spent two or three hours a week in Bee’s little office. He can see how Neil is doing the same thing everyone else is doing; he doesn’t know how to deal with Andrew when he’s so wound up and internally anxious. Andrew hadn’t showed up to practice for the past week. Rumour had it that he hadn’t even been doing his night practices with Kevin.

Aaron is not an insecure person, but the way everyone tiptoes around the reality of what is to come drives him crazy with self consciousness. He feels how his classmates have quietened down their conversations when he walks in. Even one of his professors kept him back after class to tell him not to worry about his final paper - she knew he was under a lot of stress, in her words, and he was already getting straight A’s in her class anyway. I did it! He wants to scream at them all. And I can’t deal with the fact that you’re going to find out why! He would rather they call him a monster to his face, than know they’re talking about him now in the way they’ve spent years talking about Andrew.

He feels guilt, in a way, seeing Andrew in as much of a state as he is. Knowing because of what he did to Drake, he was going to have to tell the world what had happened to him. Andrew was recounting his trauma and braving the witness stand just to keep Aaron out of danger. And that kills Aaron. Because he loves his brother, and he’s going crazy with worry and fear, the outcome of the case in the hands of the jury from the morning after.

[severus-snaps]

so I’ve been rereading the books to get the tiny snippets of Snape that don't often get brought up

but so far I’ve only read up to Harry meeting Ron on the Hogwarts Express. Although Snape has yet to be introduced I keep thinking about how similar Snape and Harry were in a lot of ways - and how different - even at the early stages. 

so this is a mostly snape-centric ramble about Harry and Sev's similarities and differences, and what they might have meant for a young Sev during his time as a child, his family, his trip to Diagon Alley, his scene on the Hogwarts Express, and what all of that might mean for his experience of being in Slytherin in his early years

Pre Hogwarts

This started as a ramble, but I’ve decided to organise it slightly - this is difficult as Harry and Snape have slightly different circumstances that are similar in some ways but different in others, so I’ve just gone back to basics for each section here

Similarities

Both are young wizards about to go to Hogwarts 

Both come from unhappy homes

Both cannot wait to go to Hogwarts/escape their ‘family home’

Both have displayed unintentional magic as children

Both as children are in ill-fitting clothes, have poor haircuts (even if Harry's grows back; Sev’s apparently does not), and are scrawny and/or small. Sev is described as looking at odds with James ("conspicuously lacked" looking well-cared-for and adored, which I suspect would also apply to Harry, if the series wasn't half in Harry's POV). 

Depending on whether you take the mistreatment and neglect literally from PS or in a more Roald Dahl-eque way in which I suspect it was initially written, Harry did not have a happy home life until this point, and neither did Snape (a witch ‘cowering’ from a Muggle and Sev’s jacket despite the heat and the Pottermore article suggest and/or state physical abuse in addition to neglect)

As far as we’re aware, Snape is not used as a servant/slave within his own home

Differences

One of the main ways Harry and Sev differ would obviously be magical knowledge; Sev knows he is a wizard, knows a lot about the wizarding world - but Harry does not

Snape is not orphaned; he has both parents (for better or for worse), where Harry has none, unless you count the Dursleys

Both Harry and Sev are obviously neglected, but Harry is neglected intentionally

Harry is intentionally excluded, neglected and ignored - but Sev’s neglect seems less intentional and more… ‘the way of things’

Sev's family are so poor and/or neglectful that Sev doesn't have his own clothes (context clues like living in a dilapidated, small house in an old industrial area suggest they just don't have the option)

Sev’s family either has no inclination or ability to amend Tobias' clothes instead of Eileen's, and/or don’t have any family friends to borrow/take hand-me-down clothes from; they are his parents’ clothes. Harry is ‘fortunate’ in that he has Dudley to take clothes from. The obvious outcome being here that otherwise he’d be wearing Vernon’s old coat and Petunia’s blouse)

Harry is raised in a middle-class home with a reasonable enough income. He gets pocket money (probably paltry and inconsistent: “The Dursleys haven’t given me pocket money for about six years”, CoS) can sneak out and eat at night, get cake (however gross) from his neighbour as she tells him about her cats. He eats with the Dursleys, plays with Dudley's toys if he's left alone, and gets gifts (even if they are pathetic). Harry’s neglect is wilful - and malicious

I get the idea that the Snape family are so poor and so unhappy that their neglect isn't even intentional, it's just how their lives are. they're steeped in it, living in a dilapidated area, poor, in an unhappy and volatile marriage

Sev is described, even as an adult, as being skinny - so maybe that's just how he's wired - but maybe (almost certainly given the other context clues and the era) he's also underfed as a kid

If we reach into parallels with the other 'abandoned boy' (voldemort), sev's mum was possibly similar to merope gaunt - unhappy, and either unwilling or unable to use magic to defend herself or sev against tobias (this conjecture is all from hazy memory; obviously i haven't read that far yet).

Overall ideas:

Neither Sev nor Harry have warm family figures. Far from Molly's checking that her gaggle are in order on platform 9 3/4 the Dursleys leave Harry there alone - and Eileen doesn't seem that bothered when Sev is about to leave (nor does he seem that bothered that he's about to leave her - he's more interested in Lily). But Snape’s lack of familial closeness seems a consequence of their situation, rather than an intentional choice, as it was with the Dursleys and Harry.

Sev (unlike Harry) doesn't really know 'how the other half live' - as far as we can tell, he has no access to the average family dynamic of the Dursleys (and they do seem happy with one another, they love Dudley, and would be living their 'ordinary' dream life if Harry wasn't there to complicate it). To add to that, I get the idea that Sev genuinely doesn't really understand why Lily likes (or loves) Petunia; he has no concept of why a family member’s opinion might count. There's not much love to lose in his family, and like Harry, he can’t wait to leave - there’s nothing holding him back. 

Unlike Harry who doesn’t know anything yet, Snape knows he's a wizard and has known all his life. He knows a lot about the wizarding world, either from his mother or her books; he tells Lily about it. Sev loves (as Harry comes to love) magic, and what it represents: escape, freedom, control over his life - and a certain amount of positive attention and interest from Lily which he is so clearly lacking elsewhere. 

But (sort of like Harry), his house at Spinner's End doesn't seem like the sort of place where magic was used like The Burrow, for example, or Malfoy Manor where Draco already flies ("doesn't your dad like magic?"; he’s alone in his room shooting down flies). It’s also not apparently used for defence/retaliation by his mother, if the shouting scene with Sev's father is any indication.

But (un)intentionally, depending on how you interpret Sev's actions with Petunia and the branch, Sev has displayed magic when he was angry or afraid, much like most magical children - and much like Harry.

Harry's examples are ‘sweeter’ at that age, on the whole: he shrinks an ugly jumper, grows his hair back, and jumps/flies on a roof, and removes glass from a snake enclosure in a comical scene. Sev drops a branch on someone, and they are genuinely upset and leave. (Some of this might be to do with the lighter tone of the earlier books as well).

Seeing as Petunia was fine enough to run away after the event and Lily stays friends with him, it can't have been an enormous branch. Sev seems guilty, so I'm certain that whilst he did want to retaliate (and for something to happen to Petunia), I'm not certain that he actually intended it to (or perhaps he did; I wouldn't blame him. I also really enjoy the idea that he's in control of his magic enough to cause it on purpose; I get the idea he's quite powerful, because of his learning to fly unsupported later in his life, which is no mean feat by this universe's rules, and his skills in wandless magic like Legi/Occlumency, spell creation, etc). [side note: that then opens up a can of worms for me bc how powerful is Lily if she can float/fly at nine, Harry can either Apparate or float/fly in primary school, at presumably a similar age - but those were accidental, brief 'flights' I suppose compared to Voldemort and Snape showing sustained flight during the battle of seven potters and jumping out of a Hogwarts window and flying away - but i digress).

So, while Harry’s no doormat, Severus is possibly more spiteful and reactive at that age; he's defiant when he drops a branch on Petunia, he's shooting down flies when he gets his wand, he's making disparaging noises to James, he's accusing Petunia of spying, and all of the other things people say to suggest he's always been a terrible person. I think, given the glimpses into a stressful, poverty-stricken and loveless home, possibly also abusive, that's essentially all he knows when threatened. Harry seems overwhelmingly polite to Hagrid in early PS - but then Hagrid has always been kind and almost reverential, which in turn would affect how a person responds. We mainly see Sev respond to Petunia in a similar context, and he’s nice enough to Lily, if a bit awkward and lacking in Harry’s politeness. 

I can see Sev, with his more ‘prickly’ upbringing, being more like Tom here in the same situation of not knowing he was a wizard - and acting more like ‘I knew I was special’ than ‘no, sorry, you’ve got the wrong guy’. But again, that might be because of the intersection of his personality and his upbringing - Harry, too, was defiant and neglected, though I get the feeling Sev’s general situation was more violent somehow, so it could’ve gone either way.

Diagon Alley

The next place where Harry and Sev's differences would be readily apparent would be in Diagon Alley. This is less about their similarities vs differences and more of a series of general rambles and speculation. 

Would Snape have even gone to Diagon? By which I mean, would he wear his mother's old robes to school, or get new ones? Did he have her old books? Would she have saved them for 11+ years? (books, maybe; robes, possibly not).

Assuming Sev went to Diagon, as all/most young Wizards do, I imagine that despite Sev knowing about magical culture he's rarely actually seen it in action because of my point above about his father not liking magic/anything much and his mother not using magic to defend herself - so he’s definitely not seen it on that scale. He'd be every bit as blown away as Harry was by the wonders of Diagon Alley, the shops, the brooms, the pets, the books - because his dream is finally coming true! He's on his way to Hogwarts!  

…Until it came to the buying. Young Sev has no vault overflowing with gold. He has no option to realistically contemplate buying a solid gold cauldron like Harry does, even if he might like to. He probably doesn't get a pet as a lovely going away (or in Harry's case, birthday) gift from a parental figure, and there’s no mention of a pet when Sev’s on Platform 9 ¾. Eileen would have had to save, or keep some money back/hidden, for all of that, given the state of his home and Muggle clothes.

tangent: by the time they reach the train, and even in diagon itself, sev is more of a ron than a harry. but how poor is the weasley family really if they always get plenty to eat and a lovely large home and all of their school supplies and brooms at home for so many kids on a single income, even if most stuff is secondhand? maybe i'm just biased bc I grew up poor and it was just me and mum and stuff Just Was secondhand, it's not the end of the world even if ron's embarrassed by it.

it's suggested in later books that ron's never (or rarely) owned a galleon. seven galleons then (assuming the prices are similar in sev's generation) seems a lot then for a wand; 9 galleons for a new book (advanced potion making apparently cost that, HBP); possibly it was eileen's own old book, and I know the curriculum doesn't change much if harry's still using it and the book was printed in the 50s, but in CoS, with lockhart's book(s), and the weasleys talking, suggest they'd have to have bought at least a few new books each year, so we can assume sev would need to do the same and otherwise he’d be borrowing old books. not to mention the potions ingredients, the robes, etc. I assume Sev got his own wand but what if he used his mother's old one (especially if she didn’t use it much - which would be nice/interesting, as another parallel where he takes predominantly after/aligns more strongly with his mother/female figures which was discussed in several other metas).

The other thing that struck me was that Harry wanted to buy a book of curses and jinxes (Curses and Counter-Curses: Bewitch your friends and befuddle your enemies!) for use on Dudley, but Hagrid dissuaded him - much like how Sev was described as knowing "more curses when he arrived at school than half the kids in seventh year" and maybe might want to curse his father and/or Petunia, but certainly learnt to curse the Marauders at a later stage.

The scene with Draco and Harry at Madam Malkin’s was also interesting to me when drawing conclusions for Sev. When comparing Harry’s experience on the Hogwarts Express to the robe shop, I’m curious how it would’ve differed or been the same. 

At Madam Malkin’s, Draco sees what he would’ve seen in Sev: a boy, small for his age, in hand-me-downs, with possibly weird hair - and Draco attempts to chat with him. 

Draco here, to an extent, represents any Malfoy (as we know, Lucius befriended Sev), and indeed any Pureblood, in the same situation - a boy raised in a wealthy magical family, with all of the experience of magic and privilege that comes with it. He wants a racing broom, he’s practically bored of magic, none of this is special. But it is special to Harry, and it’s special to Sev; it’s their lifeline and their escape. I’m not sure how much Sev would’ve appreciated or wanted to emulate that bored, over it attitude; on the one hand ‘no foolish wand-waving’ indicates that to an extent he’s not impressed with showy magic for the sake of it, on the other, he’s the Half Blood Prince. He’s done plenty of foolish wand-waving in his time, and finds it fascinating. 

Back to the conversation with Draco. Like Harry, Sev would not have played Quidditch (he can’t fly intuitively in the brief memory we see, being more akin to someone like Hermione or Neville in that regard); he would likely not have a broom already. He’s critical of ‘big Quidditch heroes’ - or is he jealous? He certainly enjoys Quidditch enough to have a rivalry with McGonagall, and that might be another part to why he ended up disliking James - maybe he really was jealous of James’ skill on the Quidditch pitch.

Then, Draco discusses houses. Here there’d be a slight difference between Sev and Harry - Harry has no idea, really, what house he’d be in - he doesn’t even know what the houses are. But Sev wants to be a Slytherin, he knows that already. Possibly because his mother was, furthering their similarities/alignment? It does seem to generally run in families, what with James “Gryffindor like my dad” Potter, Sirius “my whole family have been in Slytherin but maybe I’ll break the tradition” Black, and Draco “I know I’ll be in Slytherin because all of my family have been” Malfoy and, of course, the whole host of Weasleys). 

So, wanting to be in Slytherin would be a point in Sev’s favour, as far as the Malfoys were concerned, and wanting it (and possibly having a family member already in Slytherin) would be useful in that context, too, obviously.

But how would Sev react at this point to Draco’s personality? Harry is reminded of Dudley, and I’m not sure we have enough evidence to say whether Sev had someone similar in his life who bullied him (what his father did I would argue went far beyond bullying, and would be a much different dynamic). But Petunia would possibly have acted as a stand-in here, either as herself, or as a representation of the other Muggles in the area who knew ‘that Snape’ family from the poor address, for the reason of why Sev was otherwise friendless. I don’t think it’s a leap to imagine that Sev was unpopular with the other local kids.

Draco goes on to ask Harry whether his parents were “our kind” - to which Sev has a more ‘undesirable’ answer than Harry, because one of his parents was a Muggle. Draco talks of servants, and Sev probably wouldn’t have the same irritable reaction to that, as we don’t see any implication that he was treated in that way by his parents, unlike Harry. But also unlike Harry, Snape would be there with his witch mother (and not a “savage”), and knew about Hogwarts already. Unlike Harry, Snape might have been considered by Draco/the Malfoys/Purebloods as “the other sort” - the child of non-magical people. Draco asks for Harry’s surname, presumably to check whether he was of suitable stock (which Snape, with a Muggle surname, wouldn’t be).

Perhaps Sev would’ve similarly hated the snotty, biased, spoilt brat attitude.

Or perhaps, in this situation, he’d aspire to be like the Malfoys - to become the snotty, spoilt type. To be the bully, instead of the victim. Sev did eventually befriend the Malfoys, after all - but how much of that was an immediate friendship (unlikely, at that point, as Malfoy was older and what ~16yo wants to regularly hang out with an 11yo). We see that he’s possibly headed that way by 5th/6th year by aligning with Mulciber and Avery, but that was a new enough development that Lily commented on it at that point - but at this early stage, it’s made clear that Sev is ‘the victim’ of the bully, or the underdog, like Harry - and someone like Draco probably wouldn’t have thought much of him. (James and Sirius certainly didn’t, though not for these same exact reasons).

The Hogwarts Express

And finally, on the train. Harry has experienced celebrity in glimpses by now, at the Leaky Cauldron and at Ollivander’s - but it’s on the train and the platform where everyone from the Weasleys to Draco wants to gawk and/or befriend him.

I’ve said already that by the time they reach the train, and even in Diagon itself, Sev is more of a Ron than a Harry. Harry knows what it is to have hand-me-downs and not be able to afford anything, but that’s Sev’s continued existence unless his family suddenly won the lottery. And whilst Harry bought a heap of sweets and got a delightful new friend in Ron, Sev and Lily were (as discussed above) compelled to leave his cabin because of James and Sirius… just as Harry was interrupted by Draco, Crabbe, and Goyle. But it’s James who overhears Sev and interrupts and then says, practically word-for-word, what Draco does in Madam Malkins’ (James’ “Who wants to be in Slytherin? I think I’d leave, wouldn’t you?” vs Draco’s “Imagine being in Hufflepuff, I think I’d leave, wouldn’t you?”). Now, Sev does this too, to an extent, making a small disparaging noise at James too for wanting to be in Gryffindor like his dad (to me, another hint that Sev wants to be in Slytherin because of his mum). But that was after James had already interrupted Sev’s conversation with Lily; otherwise, Sev was content to keep to himself.

And Draco is hounding Harry for opposite reasons. Draco is attempting to ‘befriend’ Harry. Harry is a ‘desirable’ connection - he’s rich, famous, of a good wizarding name, and if adult Snape’s speech to Bellatrix is any indication, possibly considered a ‘powerful dark wizard’ around which Voldemort’s followers could rally. He’s ‘got it all’. By comparison, Snape is undesirable - he has all of Harry’s social setbacks - he looks poor, he is poor, he’s raised by Muggles and has immediate Muggle heritage, he probably wasn’t raised with extensive/overly frequent magic use, and is a bit weird looking in general - and he has none of Harry’s desirable traits like a good name, reputation, money, family, or connections. “Prince” is not a famous name by the time Harry is in school, and given wizard lifespans, they probably weren’t a big name a generation ago, either. All Sev has is knowledge of the wizarding world, which might fool or impress someone like Draco for a bit. But it’s implied that Draco believes there’s a fundamental difference in how Muggleborns/those with Muggle families are raised compared to ‘true’ wizarding families (and there really is). But Sev was raised in a Muggle area, likely not using magic or being an active part of the culture since he’s so starved for someone magical to talk to - and he’s shortly going to be in a wizarding school, where Sev’s second hand knowledge (from his mother) essentially becomes inconsequential anyway.

All in all, Draco simply wouldn’t bother, if this were a different universe. And Lucius (and others in Slytherin) probably asked all of the necessary vetting questions that Malfoy did over the course of the time in the robe shop and on the train, and reached the same conclusion: Snape wasn’t worth their time. That is, until he proved himself an adept wizard, some time later in school. (To be clear if I haven’t already: Draco is just a stand-in in this ramble for general Pureblood/Slytherin beliefs, asking the sorts of questions and acting in ways that reflect those values).

What that all means is that Snape continued to face the everyday challenges that were essentially eliminated from Harry’s life once he reached Hogwarts; challenges which would’ve had greater impact in a house like Slytherin which has a reputation for blood purity and wizarding supremacy, and many people in it who hail from rich, well-connected Pureblood families who probably are all, one way or another, related by blood or marriage anyway. Lucius was a Prefect by the time Sev got to Hogwarts, and I think Draco became one, and those sorts of attitudes were shared by Draco’s Slytherin peers and not outliers. 

Some more conjecture now: I think it’s safe to say that instead of the jocular vibe of the Gryffindor common room, an unofficial but unquestioned hierarchy would inevitably develop in Slytherin and its members would be expected to fall in line. Much like how Crabbe and Goyle followed Draco, and Pansy and Blaise etc followed Draco’s lead, I expect most of Sev’s peers would be expected to fall in line under Lucius and later authority figures as well - to keep the peace in their fancy aristocratic families, to keep the peace in their dorms, and in the real world, with a war going on and Voldemort practically recruiting from the Slytherin common room. It would’ve benefitted Sev to keep his head down in these conditions, to join in, to butter up - because unlike Harry, Sev would’ve had to work hard to make friends (being generally awkward and ‘undesirable’ as a friend by Draco/Slytherin standards). Nobody from Slytherin came to his aid in SWM, possibly because of those reasons and/or because he’d spent years being openly friends with Lily who was a Gryffindor and a Muggleborn (and thus also undesirable).

Anyway none of this is news and I have no conclusion, I just had thoughts 

[cripplecharacters]

Hi! I won't be put out if you don't answer this question, but I figured I may as well ask. For context, I am a disabled fanfic writer who's irritated by the casual ableism in my fandoms, and this blog is a big inspiration and help to me in doing my little part to represent accurately.

The fandom I'm talking about here is Hermitcraft, if that helps anyone get the jist of this. The vast majority of the characters are seen/shown as some kind of non-human or animal person, and that's how I like to show them too. There's one character, named Cleo, who's some kind of zombie-type creature in canon. She's loud, competent, snarky but still a great friend, and a talented designer.

Is it ever ableist to give Cleo a facial difference, as opposed to a different disability or condition? (It is normal in this fandom to assign characters disabilities in fics if you want, except for a few cases where the creators say they don't want specific characters given some category of condition.) I am concerned about her specifically because of her zombie-ness in canon, which is always treated as a cool and fun design feature by the fandom but still could be/look like equating a facial difference with something bad. Obviously I intend to write her having a FD in a canon setting, if I do it, as unrelated to her zombie-ness and a neutral/positive aspect of her. Is this specific issue (potential ableism) improved if she's one of a handful of characters with FDs or disabilities, or does that not help here? If it's an AU setting where all the characters are human and Cleo has an FD, is that better or worse than being in canon? (I am not at all interested in writing about discrimination, so assume there's no real-world-typical disfiguremisia at play.)

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this!

Hi,

while I appreciate wanting to include facial differences in all kinds of characters, zombies are... not great. Casting the rather uncastable fact of them being monsters aside, the popular depiction of zombies is full of connections to real life disabilities and facial differences. Think of the average zombie in Any Movie Ever; drooling, limping, eyes unaligned, missing noses, lacking teeth. These are all features that disabled people have, but in the zombie context they're used as a shock, grossness, or humor factor; sometimes they're literally based on real disabled people because why not I guess... I don't want to be like "don't ever write a zombie with a disability/FD" but on its own it leaves a bit of a bad taste in my mouth. I know people with facial differences that have been called a "zombie" because of their facial difference. TLDR; it's just the 1 billion years of ableist connotations, not something about this character specifically or the way you are portraying her - the monstrous association is beyond any single person's control, the point is to just not propagate it further - I just don't think it's a good idea, regardless of your clearly good intentions (which I do appreciate).

(The above applies to visible physical disabilities - I don't think there would be a problem having a zombie character who is autistic or has chronic pain?)

As much as I enjoy facially different fantasy creatures, zombies (or mutants, stuff like that) just aren't ideal choices in my opinion. There are some exceptions, so to illustrate;

if you were writing a fanfic for Zombie Land Saga, where all the main characters are zombies, and you gave Lily Waardenburg syndrome, then that's not a problem - everyone's a zombie and one of them happens to have an FD, just like it happens to humans. That's cool.

if you're writing a fanfic where there's one character with a facial difference, and they're a monster, that's a problem. We aren't a different species, certainly not a monster one - I don't want to ramble on the whole "real life minority being a separate fantasy race" thing, but that's another potential problem that'd be hard to ignore.

From my understanding, she isn't the only character with a facial difference, which is good. If you do decide to have Cleo be a zombie with an FD, I would just try to be aware of what kinds of characters end up having them - are they all monster, or monster-adjacent? Or some other scary creatures? Do any of the traditionally cute characters have facial differences? etc. Look out for patterns.

If she was a human with an FD, I don't see any issue here - and if she was the only zombie with an FD surrounded by humans without FDs, that's... not great. It's a weird association, even if you're not trying to make it. Other species that aren't zombies or humans could also be cool. A character with FD who's a catgirl or some sort of aquatic creature would be fun! Even a skeleton would be better than a zombie (they're not associated with the above stereotypes at all in my experience, plus skeletons are more funny than scary lol. I've never seen a disabled skeleton, I think, IDK).

I hope this helps! Feel free to send another ask if you have another question

mod Sasza

edit after the replies: I'm not familiar with the source material quite literally at all, but if this is a real life thing then please don't give actual people facial differences in fanfiction (opinions on RPF aside.)