#and he generally is just a HUGE asshole ofc yeah

[bingobongobonko]

weeps. why is yves such a piece of shit asshole. i love you yves.

[scalpelsister]

I still need to save a good deal more but I am getting really close to being able to afford my first tattoo + have a parlor picked out. stick figure violence.

[the-crustation-sensation]

Even more Hobie x reader hc’s!!

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

A/N Just SFW for now bc I have NO ideas for smut currently 😭

I might post some later tho <3

As always I write these for anyone to insert, so non-gendered terms are used (:

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚

* I am SICK AND TIRED of you guys hcing him as a dirty troll. just bc he’s a punk does not mean he doesn’t have fucking hygiene skills. Yes ofc he’s Spider-Man so he doesn’t have a lot of free time but it’s not like he goes a month without showering

* I feel like most of the time he smells like old cologne (probably something with musk, oak, or vanilla) and weed

* I’m also tired of you guys hcing him as a toxic asshole (bro LITERALLY helped miles without even knowing him, and how already homies within like the first 10 minutes of meeting)

* With that said you already know he’d be the most caring and attentive partner

* He definitely has a note on his phone of things you like, are passionate about, and mentioned wanting. It just keeps growing bc he wants to keep track of everything you love 😭

* Anytime he gives you a gift he hand makes it (or alternatively gets it from a small business) he says it feels more meaningful and personal

* I think his love languages are acts of service and physical touch

* This man is obsessed with showing you off to EVERYONEEE. He would definitely pull you onstage during one of his concerts just to be like “hey everyone this is my S/O”

* He would love walking around with his hand in your back pocket, or yours In his

* He’s a crow, 100% picks up random stuff off of the sidewalk that caught his eye and gives it to you

* kind of a huge klepto He does not hesitate shoplifting from big corporations when he sees something he knows you’d like

* Although he would never EVER steal from a small business

* Just imagine he comes home and gives you a shirt for a band you like and you see the security tag is still on 😭 and he’s like “what 🤨”

* Definitely a “hmm?” “Oh yeah?” “Is that so?” “Make me” type of guy (SCREAMING)

* He’s such a tease, and just a brat in general. Just imagine your fed up and ask him to do something and he pulls the “yes ma’am/sir” move

* He’s the type of help bust you out of a holding cell/help you run from the police (he’s your partner in crime I’ll die on this hill)

* He love starting harmless beef with people online for no reason, specifically getting into fights with kids on ROBLOX just to see them get mad

* Man has like 1029292 emails to make new accounts bc he’s gotten banned from doing this so many times 😭

* He loves playing video games with you. especially if your playing something like cod or a racing game he would aggressively wiggle your controls to mess you up and act like nothing happened

* Ok ok hear me out, he doesn’t believe in games or things having an age limit, so he would play those 2 player ROBLOX obbys with you. He also LOVES playing horror games with you, you guys always yell at eachother over who has to go in front tho

* Y’all can communicate without even speaking ISTG

* He discreetly nudges your shoulder during a meeting and side eyes someone in the room, translates to “you see this shit??” Glancing towards the door then at you “let’s ditch this” peeking over someone’s shoulder and making eye contact with you while he’s talking to someone “HELP ME.” Or alternatively “is this bitch FR??”

* He has the mouth of a sailor, has taught mayday multiple cus words and acts like nothing happened

* He LOVES kids, absolutely loves them, he would be such an amazing parent

THIS IS HIM PROVE ME WRONG

* This might be an unpopular opinion but I don’t think he would give a shit what race/gender you are, he loves you for YOU and doesn’t care what color you are or what’s in-between your legs (in short he’s bisexual and doesn’t give a shit about whatever you are, he’s here for your personality)

* I think his favorite flavor of juice would be cranberry, but like the rlly tart cranberry juice

* Height thing’s but not because your short, just bc he’s freakishly tall

* As a fandom we’ve already established he does the thing where your cooking, or minding your own business, and he hugs you from behind and puts his chin on your head/shoulder

* I don’t think he has a “type” per say, but I feel like he’d prefer people who are also in any sort of alternative culture (punk, goth, emo, alt, and I dare say earthy/fairy TO AN EXTENT counts for that)

* I am biased because you can’t tell me this man wouldn’t fuck with a goth bitch, or just another punk (his WEAKNESS is punk girls)

* He loves doing makeup for you, especially eyeliner because that gives him and excuse to get you to sit in his lap

* If you don’t already play guitar, he would defiantly teach you by sitting behind you with his head on your shoulder to show you the right cords

* And he’s definitely gonna be praising tf outta you “good job” “yeah, you got it love” “mhm just like that”

* He also loves doing your hair/helping you do/cut your hair, no matter what texture it is

* I feel like before he settled in punk he went through an emo phase in middle school, and HATES his pictures from that era, like he would tackle someone to get it away if they found any trace of it

* He probably had some fuck ass fake piercings because his parents wouldn’t let him get real ones, and crusty eyeliner in his 7Th grade school photo

* I think his first face piercing was a nose piercing he got done in the school bathrooms in 10th grade by some girl with a safety pin

* It 100% got hella infected and he got so grounded for that

* He puts you first in almost every situation, like it he’s in the middle of a mission with another spider, and you text him, it will be like that scene with miles fighting the spot because he will text you back no matter WHAT

* I’m not sure about this one but I think his world is set in the early 70s (when punk fashion started getting more popular) so when he first came to HQ and saw all of this new text he was amazed and confused as hell

* It took him like a week to figure out most of that shit at HQ

* Most people don’t know he lives on a house houseboat, but I absolutely love that.

* Shit constantly falls off of his shelves from the waves but he couldn’t give 2 fucks about it

* he hates being called “Hobart” if you call him that he’ll either not respond, or know that your PISSED and shits about to go down

* he’s definitely pansexual or bisexual, like I said he loves pussy and dick equally, I feel like also hes either a transman, or AMAB and gender-fluid. Either way there’s no way he’s a cis man, he ATLEAST is he/they

* if he is a transman he would get top surgery but I don’t think he would get bottom surgery, he loves his man-pussy and he thinks if your too brainwashed by society’s gender norms then fuck you

* I think he would also get vines or mushrooms, or like barbed wire tattooed near his top scars

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Alright that’s everything I have for today! If you have any ideas please don’t hesitate to comment or to hit up my asks! I have a few asks I’m currently working on but I also have a bigger original story I’m writing so I’ve kinda been in writers block

If you want to be apart of my tag list don’t hesitate to ask (:

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚

[jonahfagnus]

i dont think you ever posted about your "jon sees elias as jonah when he takes the archivist job" au but please start with that immediately 👀👀👀👀👀👀

so i dont think theres very much that i didnt say in the tags of the post i made about it (unless tumblr ate those for some reason)

but basically. yeah after jon takes the archivist position he starts seeing elias as jonah (at elias' age, not as like. a corpse in the panopticon). obviously he immediately realises that its jonah bcs, yknow, the guys paintings are everywhere.

i imagine jon's train of thought is something like this:

did my boss get possessed by jonah magnus -> no thats dumb ghosts arent real -> im having a psychotic episode -> surely id be seeing other symptoms -> what the FUCK is happening

so a huge amount of jon's desire to find the truth about the supernatural ends up focused on jonah. initially he's just doing research into the actual guy jonah magnus himself but that doesnt really get him anywhere because its not like jonah was like "dear diary im an eye avatar and im going to start putting my eyes into other people so i can be immortal" so he starts doing research into elias instead. which also turns out to be quite difficult just doing normal research.

luckily, jon and elias are decently friendly with each other (at least in early s1, which this would still be). so surely its not weird to try and make sure your relationship with your boss is positive. thats just common sense thats just cultivating a welcoming workplace environment or whatever. and ofc elias is like

bcs this is objectively great! jons leaning into the eye hes considering breaching elias' privacy to learn more about him and ofc hes flattered that jon is so focused on him in particular. so he allows jon to break into his office and look through his things and he pretends he isnt watching the entire time, and he casually mentions some flaws in his home security to try and spur jon into breaking into his house (which he doesnt. yet.)

they're sort of not-quite-dating - tim might joke about jon going on dates with elias and jon gets very flustered and denies it and elias is a little over affectionate in public just to see how jon reacts, but neither of them have any idea that jon's doing all of this just so he can figure out why his boss is (apparently) the founder of the institute.

then prentiss happens. then they find gertrude's body.

i dont think jon gets as paranoid as he does in canon - hes been less of an asshole since all of his focus has gone into researching elias and trying to figure out what the fuck happened. so while i think he does do some research into the archival crew, its mainly research into gertrude herself, and continuing his research into elias. now with added stalking!

and of course elias still doesnt care about the stalking because hes still 1. very happy jon is taking to the eye so well and 2. flattered that jon is so focused on him to the point of stalking him. in my heart i know elias considers stalking to be a form of flirting

s2 goes generally the same but i want jon to find out about the not-them just a little sooner so i can make him go "holy shit! elias got not-them'd! what the fuck!" of course this is completely incorrect if you know anything about how the not-them works but jon. doesnt.

jon, of course, breaks the table. then he finds out that sasha got not-them'd. then he finds out leitner is alive. then he finds out leitner is dead.

who else does he have to go to? he shows up at elias' home, maybe just minutes after elias finishes cleaning up, because a man has been killed in his office and he didnt do it.

because i am a soft elias truther s3 isnt just manipulation and horrible things happening for jon. horrible things still do happen (elias very much doesnt discourage him from talking to jude perry, or mike crew, for example) and elias is still a bastard but its probably not any significant amount more horrible than canon s3 was.

jon probably spends amounts of time talking to elias about what leitner told him (which is hilarious to elias) and elias (against his better judgement) doesnt tell jon that leitner was lying, but instead asks him questions that may or may not lead him to figuring out the entities. he's curious as to what's going to happen, and he's sure jon likes him enough that showing just a little of what he knows wont tarnish their relationship

i dont have many thoughts beyond that - the confrontation probably goes differently, for example, and maybe jon permanently moves in with elias. i cant decide how much of a corruption arc i should give jon (obviously he ends up much more content with the eye than in canon bcs the eye is sexy but i cant decide if hes pro apocalypse or not) but when jon finds out that elias is jonah hes like "oh i know" and jonah is like what the fuck do you mean

[fanfic-scribbles]

Dinner Date Chapter 28

Masterlist

Previous Chapter Next Chapter

Overall Story Facts:

Fandom: MCU Captain America/Avengers

Story Summary: Steve Rogers has a girlfriend. A prickly, generally asocial girlfriend, but they make it work. They have more in common than some people might think.

Quick Facts: Romance – Steve Rogers/Reader – Female Reader

Story Warnings: Reader-insert that verges on OFC, written in 1st person past tense

Chapter 28: A Celebration of Life

Chapter Summary: Steve gets an early birthday present, and reflects on good things past and present.

Chapter Word Count: 4342

A/N: This frigging chapter. It took some work but I’m finally pretty happy with it, and I hope you all have fun with it too. Warning for the very end: there is a section marked ~extra~ that goes into third person, present tense from an outside perspective. It was a little experiment and if you don’t like it I don’t think you have to read it since it is slightly divorced from what this fic is actually about, but…it does hint at something that will come up again in the future. Not any time soon, judging by how much work this chapter took, but… :3 Anyways. Enjoy!

~

Watching Pepper on the phone was an…experience.

Steve was doing some Avengers stuff in the training room and he was late so I ended up waiting in one of the upper floors, because apparently leaving to chill at a coffee shop was ‘weird’ and ‘anti-social’ and the day Tony Stark got to brag about being a better-adjusted human being was the day I bit off my own tongue. So there I was, drink in hand, with Pepper for company, while Pepper was still technically working. Or something.

What could have been an unbearably awkward situation though became a masterclass in how a functional adult handled a difficult phone call. At least, I assumed it was difficult. I sort of hoped it was difficult because if this was what she had to deal with normally that was fucked. I tried not to stare, and she was far enough away, (in this giant room bigger than most city apartments), that words filtered in and out, and she danced the line between patient and patronizing in a way her voice kind of masked but her facial expressions betrayed. It was kind of hilarious, at points, but eventually her expression relaxed, her shoulders sank, and she said, “Thank you,” in a way only the truly tired could, and after a few more pleasantries she lowered the phone, let out a heavy sigh, and detoured back to grab something from the fridge before she came back to the sitting area.

“I am so sorry about that,” she said and fell back onto the chair next to me.

“Oh, no, don’t be–” I said and waved her off, only realizing that was my drink hand just before I could slosh liquid onto a couch that probably cost more than my rent, and quickly settled back down. “I’m sorry for crashing.” I could only bite my tongue so far though. “However, no offense, but Tony Stark doesn’t get to be right about anything, ever, if I have a say in it.”

“That’s the only right way to deal with him,” she agreed. She popped the tab on her can, whatever was inside fizzed, and she took a long drink. Even that looked refined when she did it. She breathed a sigh of relief. “In any case, I have most of his birthday sorted, so that’s one thing off my plate.”

I nodded. Tony Stark’s birthday would be a huge to-do– wait. “Wait.” Wait. “Didn’t…didn’t he just have a birthday?”

“I start planning well in advance,” Pepper said. She gave me a very tired look. “Do you have any idea how hard he is to shop for?”

“God I can only imagine,” I said, because even without the obscene amount of money…yeah. I had decided to err on the side of liking Tony Stark, (especially after he had that PR ‘snafu’ for going off on that asshole who had been snarkily homophobic about Steve), but he was, and probably always would be, A Lot. “That must be nice to have it all set up though. I just barely found something for Steve’s birthday.”

Pepper got a look on her face that felt familiar. Though whether that was a ‘Steve’ grimace or a ‘another fucking gift-giving holiday’ grimace I was a little unsure of. “Speaking of people hard to shop for…” She sighed and rubbed her head.

I could sympathize. Hardcore. “If you really want to get him something he’d be fine even with a nice message on a pretty card.”

She gave me a ‘seriously?’ look, so I said, “Seriously.” And I (seriously) thought about it. “Heartfelt can be hard though, so I get it. But he really isn’t fussy. Charity donation in his name? A ‘get out of PR jail free’ card the next time he pisses off Fox News?”

She seemed to consider it, but then shook her head. “What did you get him?”

I puffed up, because my gift was awesome. “Concert tickets for an act and opener he’s going to love, and I’ve planned out dinner at a place he hasn’t been to yet.” It was torture to have to wait on the second one, but it was going to be worth it. Pepper was right; Steve was awful to buy for and always insisted he didn’t need anything and I was about to score ‘best girlfriend ever’ points for at least a month. I could only hope the memory of this birthday would help ease the sting of the future gifts I was inevitably going to whiff it on.

“That sounds wonderful,” Pepper said. Calculating. I did not like that. “How good are the tickets?”

Yeah, I really didn’t like that. “They’re perfect.”

She smiled deviously. “I bet I can get you better ones.”

“Nuh uh, paws off,” I said and mimed smacking her hands away. “This is my gift. You go get your own.”

She faked a heavy sigh– the smile gave her right away. “Any suggestions?”

I shrugged. “Are there any art things going on?”

It was a sort of flippant suggestion– she seemed like a fancy, in-the-know lady, and fancy, in-the-know ladies would know about stuff like art shows. However, I realized we both understood it for the surprisingly good suggestion it was at the same time. A part of me was a little bummed I hadn’t thought to bank that for myself for another time. A bigger part of me though was pretty happy to look smart in front of Pepper Potts. Also being helpful to Steve’s friends was nice or whatever.

And by the near-glow of her eyes, she already had a good idea, which was going to be good for Steve, so I couldn’t be too upset about it. “That. Is genius.”

I shrugged and tried not to smile as hard as I wanted to. “I try.”

“Do you know what kind of art he likes best?” she asked, whipping out her phone and tapping at the screen with furious purpose.

“He varies a lot and I haven't delved into his absolute favorites yet,” I admitted. It seemed to change by the week sometimes. “He posts some stuff on social media and goes around there liking things. Though if I could say one thing, I would advise you to be careful of abstract. Some of it he really likes and some of it he really fucking hates and I have no idea where that line is.”

“It’s okay; this– I think he’ll like this. It’ll be a little early but…” she said and beamed at me as she held the phone up to her ear. ‘Thank you!’ she mouthed and walked off before starting a whole new conversation.

I shrugged and leaned back against the couch. Since it involved Steve, I’d probably find out why she seemed so excited soon enough.

~

A few days later counted for soon enough. “So,” Steve said, fake-casual as he slid onto the couch next to me. Why he bothered trying to attempt casual with that barely-suppressed grin on his face, I could not fathom.

“So,” I said and kissed him, because he really was too cute to resist sometimes.

“So,” he repeated, but slipped his arm behind me and cupped my hip in a way that told me we could continue that line of activities later. “Pepper got me two tickets to an art gallery I’ve been looking forward to,” he said, focusing again. “Opening night of a new exhibit. Would you come with me?”

“That sounds great,” I said. “Pepper doesn’t want to go with you?”

“She’ll be there, but she said she’s going to be networking,” Steve said. “This way we can come and go whenever we want. I’ve been to a couple of showings; most of the time the people there are too snooty to care about Captain America hanging around, but I’ve seen previews of the pieces that are going to be there and they look amazing…”

Steve continued to go on about some of the artists and that somehow led to lighting and negative space and tonality and I sort of lost the thread after a while but I couldn’t help it– interesting though it was, it was more interesting to watch him go off into his own little world, smiling so easily as he talked about art education videos he was watching and he was just so happy that I couldn’t help but stare at him and soak it all in.

When he took a moment to go to the bathroom, I snuck out my phone and opened up my text log with Pepper.

Me: A++++ gift giving he’s going to be excited all the way to it Pepper: Thank you for the excellent idea Pepper: I hope I’ll see you there? Me: Definitely

“Who are you texting?” Steve asked as he sat back down and pulled my legs into his lap.

“Pepper. I was just telling her she did a great job with your gift,” I said and put my phone down.

“Really?” He let out a sigh of relief. “I was afraid I was boring you already.”

“I like hearing you talk about it,” I said. “I like hearing you happy and excited.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. It’s almost like I care about you or some bullshit.”

“Well that can’t be right,” Steve said, but he was smiling too hard to be serious. “You have a reputation and all.”

“Damn right I do,” I said, and opened my arms. “Now get over here and ruin it.”

His grin was a little more wicked for what I had meant by that but, well.

I definitely didn’t mind his definition of ruin.

~

Art parties had pretty great food.

Well, this one did. The drinks were a little substandard but I kept an eye on the waiters with the finger platters at almost all times as I wandered around with Steve who, true to his prediction, did not get glommed on at all. I also watched for snootiness but everything felt really oddly chill and relaxed and…nice. It wasn’t as fancy as I had feared, but it definitely still cleaved to the nice side, and we had dressed up accordingly, but everyone really did seem to be there for the art, which was also pretty awesome.

And then there was Steve. He mostly stuck by me as we wandered from piece to piece, and whenever the artist was around and willing to talk with him, he always took the chance. So far he had a hundred percent success rate in surprising them by actually knowing his shit, and that was kind of vindictively fun to watch. I hadn’t paid attention to the theming and was at the point where I was too embarrassed to ask, but it seemed like a new art take on classic pieces and movements of the past. Leyendecker through a Warhol lens which had a companion piece of Warhol but make it like Leyendecker. Art deco graffiti. Alphonse Mucha if his seasons were made in the era of global warming.

So it was pretty fantastic. And we even got to hang out with Pepper for a little bit, the three of us stealing away to a corner with a small pile of pilfered snacks and drinks.

“You really do find the best hideouts,” Pepper told me appreciatively.

“I take my duties as resident miser very seriously,” I said, and tried not to beam too much at the compliment. Steve was grinning at me though, and when Pepper was distracted by saying hi to someone, I threw a napkin at his face.

“I saw that,” she said, but with a wicked smirk. She then stood up and straightened the end of her form-fitting dress. “Steve, have you seen the hallway gallery yet?”

Steve and I both peered where she was gesturing; a very wide hallway with good lighting that not many people were going down now. “Not yet,” he said as we both sat back.

She smiled cryptically. “I think you should. There’s a really great artist– well, several of course, but there’s one with a piece in particular that I…I think you might like.”

She escaped with a quick farewell, and I munched on the last of the snacks. “Mysterious,” I said once I was dusting my hands of the crumbs.

Steve stood and held his hand to me. “Let’s go find out, Watson.”

I scoffed, but took his hand. “I’m way more of a social disaster than you,” I said as we walked. “I should get to be Sherlock.”

“Solving mysteries seems like a lot of work though,” he said.

“True,” I admitted.

We meandered leisurely down the hallway, looking at each art piece and leaving the scarce few people behind as we went. I remembered briefly looking down this area at the start of the night and thinking, ‘Nope,’ with the ridiculous amount of people that had been down here before, but apparently they had all seen what there was to see, leaving us to enjoy it practically on our own.

“This is nice–” I suddenly bumped into Steve. “Oof!” I quickly backed up a few steps and he remained. Stock still. “Steve?” I asked, but he was staring up at the wall to my right, his expression stricken, and I turned to see what had him by the metaphorical throat. It was a mural, massive, and it took me a second for it to all come into view. When it did, when the image of a man with a very familiar visage fell into place, all I could manage was a soft, “Oh.”

“Bucky,” Steve said in an awed exhalation. I looked from him, to the painting, and back and forth again. He seemed to be taking it all in and I had nothing I could think to say, so I did much the same. It was a beautiful work of art; colors faded seamlessly together and words of varying sizes acted as modified stippling to create the whole image of one James Buchanan Barnes, larger than life like a comic book hero, but with a serious set to his face, wearing the iconic jacket, and fading out where it looked like he’d be holding a gun in his arms.

After several minutes of utter silence, I tentatively rubbed Steve’s arm. He flinched a little, but gave me a small, slightly twisted smile. “Sorry,” I said. “I just wanted to make sure you were still breathing.”

He huffed a laugh, but his eyes looked a little wet and he blinked furiously. “It’s…I’m sorry; it’s…”

I squeezed his arm. “Hey,” I said softly. “It’s okay. It’s always okay and it’s always going to be okay.”

He swallowed and sniffled, but through sheer stubbornness did not let go of one single manly tear. Crying in public did suck though, so I wasn’t about to give him a hard time about it. I rubbed his arm up and down as comfortingly as I could, trying to help, and he moved slightly to take the hand I wasn’t using. “Sometimes it doesn’t feel like it,” he admitted softly, and gave me a weak smile.

“I know,” I said softly. I would have kissed him if I could have gotten away with it, but someone was walking down the hall towards us, so all I could manage was a brief but tight squeeze of his hand before I let go entirely, and he visibly tried to brace himself for the oncoming interaction.

“Hello!” a breathless woman said as she approached. She looked young but carried herself confidently, dressed in a stylish combination of pants, half-skirt, and suit-top, with locs in a beautiful half up-do that framed her face and cascaded down past her shoulders. “I was told there was someone who–”

As soon as she saw Steve, a lot of that confidence just evaporated and she froze with kind of an ‘urk!’ look on her face. As the seconds ticked on and Steve didn’t (probably couldn’t) speak, I squared up and hoped I wasn’t going to make a mess of things. I cleared my throat. “Are you the artist?” I asked. She looked at me, still a little frozen, but she managed a jerky nod and pulled her shoulders down from her ears. “It’s beautiful,” I said as emphatically as I could.

She seemed a little reassured, but her eyes flicked back to Steve, who was looking at it again. He swallowed and managed to look at her, a small smile on his face. “Absolutely amazing,” he said.

She exhaled such a long breath that I had to bite my hand not to laugh, while Steve was startled into doing just that. “I’m so sorry,” she said and waved her hand, relaxing a lot more as she walked closer. “My brother told me someone was standing over here but he didn’t mention who, and when I saw you, I wasn’t sure if it was uh…offensive?”

“In your brother’s defense, no one’s come that close so he probably didn’t get a good look at me,” Steve said, still a little dreamy as he looked at the picture. After a second though he frowned and looked at the woman, more focused. “Why would it be– it’s not offensive; it’s incredible. And I mean technically too; the way you…”

He drew closer to her, talking about the art itself, and she snapped into being a professional, talking to him, explaining the piece that was part of a series on the Howling Commandos, and I stepped back to let them have at it. I couldn’t keep from looking at the art itself again. I tried to imagine how I would think, if it was of Steve, if Steve had– but…I didn’t really want to think of that, right now, in the middle of what was actually Pepper’s birthday gift to him, meant to mark his life.

Though, I thought and tilted my head to see it from another angle, what a life. To make such a mark on the world that this many years after he was gone, an artist, a complete stranger, would spend however many hours of her life putting forth the effort to try and make him as large as the legacy he left behind.

Steve was right. It was pretty amazing.

~

We stayed there until it was time for the gallery to close. Though Steve had made sure he had all of the artist’s socials, and her website where he could see the picture any time he wanted, he still seemed to be soaking in the presence of the piece itself. So I felt a little like a jerk that I was getting sleepy, and I leaned into him to try and relinquish some of the energy used in standing straight to focus on appearing as awake as I could. He leaned into me in return, and I looked up at him. His expression was…peaceful. A little happy, even, and he glanced over at me and smiled a little more.

“What are you thinking?” he asked softly.

I was more curious about what was going on in his head, but I wondered if even he knew. I still didn’t know how I would really feel if someone I loved so dearly was now being immortalized by strangers in giant murals, gone long enough to have become simply part of a story long past. Steve was here, and alive, and I was grateful for every moment of that, every turn of his life that led him here, that I didn’t want to think of the other way it could have easily been.

So I snuggled in and asked, maybe a little quietly, “Is it weird if I say your boyfriend was pretty cute?”

That probably could have gone badly, I thought in a way too belated realization, but Steve snorted and clamped his hand over his mouth as he tried to get a handle on it. Eventually he breathed deep, but the smile stayed strong. “He was very handsome,” he agreed and shot me a little smirk. “He would have corrected you with that.” Steve shook his head. “God, the two of you…I don’t know if I’d’ve survived that.”

I rested my head on his shoulder and squeezed his hand. “You probably would have been fine,” I said. “I would have been hard on him too. Sharing a boyfriend doesn’t get you any free passes. Just ask Peggy.”

He snorted, then looked abashed. “Fair enough.” He looked around. “Let me just snap a quick picture of this and then we’ll head out, all right?”

“Of course,” I said and took a few steps back to make sure I was out of the way. Steve took several shots, some from different angles, and then started to slip his phone back into his pocket when he suddenly stopped, and looked at me. “Hey,” he said. “Can I take a picture of you in front of it too?”

I leaned my head to one side and looked at it again. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah.” He smiled. “Past and present; I just…really like the idea.”

“Sap,” I said, but my heart melted faster than an ice cube in July and I went to stand in front of the picture. I didn’t know how to pose, but after a moment considered how well Steve had taken my joke about how attractive Bucky was and– what the hell. I turned my back to the subject, clasped my hands in front of my face, bent one leg behind me, and threw the most coquettish look over my shoulder I could muster.

Steve snorted so hard, and took so long to regain his composure, I started tilting from my poorly-thought-out balance before he finally snapped a photo he was happy with. “You’re terrible,” he said with an out-and-out grin as I rejoined him.

“You love it,” I said and stood as close as I dared, even with the event winding down.

Steve showed no concern for any of that, and wrapped his arms around me. “I really do,” he murmured and snuck a soft, but lingering kiss.

~

~extra~

The picture causes a sense of overwhelming echoes in the back of the mind. It makes him want to break something.

He doesn’t. Someone spent time and effort and this isn’t his and this isn’t him. Not really. Not anymore. He sighs and relaxes his shoulders, and checks the time absently. The security guard won’t make it over here for at least another twenty minutes, and he intends to be long gone by then.

He should be gone now, and yet he stays. James. Barnes. Bucky. They don’t feel quite right anymore, fitting better the unreal image in front of him, and yet still he keeps them, like a familiar old coat gone too tight at the shoulders but too sentimental in value to throw out. In any case he refuses to be the Asset or the Soldier, and he can’t think of another name he would choose otherwise, and so he…keeps them. Just in case they fit right again.

He can’t wait to be out of New York though. He thought it would help, maybe bring things into focus, but those old memories come with flashes of pain, like when they were forced out of him, and he has to grit his teeth against every flinch they bring. He only wanted to come and check on…Steve. Because Steve is, was, always has been, the one thing that matters, and as hard as it has been keeping him ignorant of the ‘Soldier’s’ identity, the one thing that makes it easy is imagining the look on Steve’s face if he realizes what Bucky became.

That fight. It still hurts to think of; makes him wince. It’s better now than it was at the time though. At the time he fought through what felt like double-vision, a face ghosting over the one in front of him, and then to complicate things, the Target, the Mission, was competent in ways he had never known before; every hit matched, blow for blow, the Asset’s implacable strength against the Captain’s unyielding resolve.

And then.

“I can do this all day.”

And he had cracked in two. Six little words had broken him entirely, backup had arrived, and the Asset-not-but-yes had…fled.

But not back to his masters.

The months thereafter were (are) a haze of repressed memories, repressed nightmares, repressed…everything. But without constant conditioning and punishment, he had managed to pull himself back into the shadow of a person. And now he…

He breathes slowly, and finds himself holding his forehead again. He shakes away the pain, stands tall, and looks back to the museum entrance where he had watched Steve leave. With his date. With his partner. And it…hadn’t made him violent, like he feared it might.

Steve is happy. Genuinely happy in a way that makes Bucky nearly relax with relief, and the hurt isn’t as bad as it could be. He’s taking care of and being taken care of in return, and the jealousy and anger Bucky was prepared to have to deal with is just an empty space. This is good. This is better for everyone.

He sighs and checks his watch. Time to go. He has a tip that the redhead has not managed to sniff out yet (Jesus Christ she’s like a bloodhound sometimes) and he’s left another trail for them to pick up on while he follows this because, no offense lady, but this one is a lot more personal and he is actually looking forward to tracking this particular ‘head’ down so he can kick it right in the teeth.

Steve has a life. A good life. And he has a chance to live it now. He’ll handle cleaning up the small fries, and come home at the end of the day. Bucky will continue to take care of the worst of it. As he has. As he should.

He turns, and leaves the image of James Buchanan Barnes in the past. Where he belongs.

~

Previous Chapter Next Chapter

[erroticaz]

personally i hate peoples perception of pregame kokichi. so i'll tell you about my own little headcanon!

•he's not as shy as people believe, just a little quieter then ingame.

•still a total asshole he just keeps his comments to himself. so it's more like “i fucking hate you but i'm never gonna tell you that because it would be too much of a hassle. so i'll just keep it to myself." (sorta like that? idk i have the idea perfectly planned out in my head i just can't translate that over to words kms) very hesitant and kinda polite when you first meet him, not so much polite- more like kinda distant? trying not to interact as much as possible, y'know? once you get to know him though he eventually opens up. he's very sarcastic, because ofc he is LMAO

•definitely an introvert. not a big fan of parties or other people in general lol. if he does have plans it's usually only with one or two people (probably shuichi or kiibo etc). he'd rather stay home and write then do anything else. i also have a little idea that when the announcement that danganronpa will be starting auditions for the next game he writes and designs what he wants his character to be like! (i started a little story about it a while back but never finished it- i'd love to finish it one day, i just can't seem to find the proper words to describe the ideas in my mind. if i could write it'd be fuckin over for you guys istg I HAVE SO MANY GOOD IDEAS) he's a big doodler and loves english class. huge dork for creative writing.

•he's into danganronpa and is a big fan of it, but not as much as shuichi is. shuichi is the one who originally got him into it. he's been into it since it first came out, so kokichi has a lot of catching up to do lol

•oh right! okay so kokichi and shuichis relationship. i don't see them as love interests even though i do love saiouma. but pregame? they're just awkward best friends. 100%. both just a bunch of fuckin nerds who have a special interest that no one else at their school has (if anyone else does they're not as vocal about it as them, or at least as shuichi is lol) they're not the most liked people in the world but it's okay, they honestly like it just being the two of them. they have sleepovers frequently and binge watch a bunch of the danganronpa seasons (shuichis already finished every season like twice but watches it with kokichi anyway, trust me he doesn't mind). but yeah, they're just two teenage boys! shuichi isn't a fuckin yandere or anything. fuck that. admittedly, i do fancy the idea but NOT as a headcanon. maybe as an AU but for that to be the way you see him?? bro. he has nerd energy RADIATING off of him. not a yandere, just a weeb who likes danganronpa.

[trigger warning for this one]

•kokichi is definitely a mamas boy. his dad used to be around but had some serious drug/alcohol issues. she worked hard to provide for her family as best she could, working hours and hours at a low paying 9-5 job. all the money she earned, his father would steal. take for his own to buy drugs and cigarettes. but because she was always working, she had no one to watch kokichi. she had to leave him there with his father throughout the day. she gave him a small phone and told him to call her if his father ever did anything bad or got too drunk. of course he would never do anything to harm him, intentionally, but as drunk as he was all the time he could never really be aware of his actions.. this went on for a while until it eventually just got too bad. she couldn't leave him with his father anymore. kokichi had been left crying to many times for her to allow. his father left when kokichi was around 6-7. his mother had enough of his behavior and told him to get out. plates were shattered, things were thrown, threats of murder were even brought upon him and his mother. but she did not stand down, she protected her son without fail. he eventually stood down and walked out. of course not without cursing and shouting profanities at the woman. swerving off drunkenly in her car. she felt awful for having her son witness his father like this, so she did anything to make it up to him. years went on and things got better, kokichi was a teenager now, his mother in her forties. money was less tight so she stopped working so many hours and spent more time with her son. they grew slightly apart, as most teenagers do with their parents but they would still be close. they'd watch movies on weekends and joke around with each other a lot, she truly was just a wonderful woman. she'd make lunches for him in brown paper bags because she knows he doesn't like the schools cafeteria food, he was always embarrassed by this though. (definitely not me projecting onto him whatt no pshh that's….. that's totally crazy)

that's all i can think of right now! maybe i'll add on more later hehe

[violettever]

personally i hate peoples perception of pregame kokichi.

so i’ll tell you about my own little headcanon!

•he’s not as shy as people believe, just a little quieter then ingame.

•still a total asshole he just keeps his comments to himself. so it’s more like “i fucking hate you but i’m never gonna tell you that because it would be too much of a hassle. so i’ll just keep it to myself.” (sorta like that? idk i have the idea perfectly planned out in my head i just can’t translate that over to words kms) very hesitant and kinda polite when you first meet him, not so much polite- more like kinda distant? trying not to interact as much as possible, y’know? once you get to know him though he eventually opens up. he’s very sarcastic, because ofc he is LMAO

•definitely an introvert. not a big fan of parties or other people in general lol. if he does have plans it’s usually only with one or two people (probably shuichi or kiibo etc). he’d rather stay home and write then do anything else. i also have a little idea that when the announcement that danganronpa will be starting auditions for the next game he writes and designs what he wants his character to be like! (i started a little story about it a while back but never finished it- i’d love to finish it one day, i just can’t seem to find the proper words to describe the ideas in my mind. if i could write it’d be fuckin over for you guys istg I HAVE SO MANY GOOD IDEAS) he’s a big doodler and loves english class. huge dork for creative writing.

•he’s into danganronpa and is a big fan of it, but not as much as shuichi is. shuichi is the one who originally got him into it. he’s been into it since it first came out, so kokichi has a lot of catching up to do lol

•oh right! okay so kokichi and shuichis relationship. i don’t see them as love interests even though i do love saiouma. but pregame? they’re just awkward best friends. 100%. both just a bunch of fuckin nerds who have a special interest that no one else at their school has (if anyone else does they’re not as vocal about it as them, or at least as shuichi is lol) they’re not the most liked people in the world but it’s okay, they honestly like it just being the two of them. they have sleepovers frequently and binge watch a bunch of the danganronpa seasons (shuichis already finished every season like twice but watches it with kokichi anyway, trust me he doesn’t mind). but yeah, they’re just two teenage boys! shuichi isn’t a fuckin yandere or anything. fuck that. admittedly, i do fancy the idea but NOT as a headcanon. maybe as an AU but for that to be the way you see him?? bro. he has nerd energy RADIATING off of him. not a yandere, just a weeb who likes danganronpa.

[trigger warning for this one]

•kokichi is definitely a mamas boy. his dad used to be around but had some serious drug/alcohol issues. she worked hard to provide for her family as best she could, working hours and hours at a low paying 9-5 job. all the money she earned, his father would steal. take for his own to buy drugs and cigarettes. but because she was always working, she had no one to watch kokichi. she had to leave him there with his father throughout the day. she gave him a small phone and told him to call her if his father ever did anything bad or got too drunk. of course he would never do anything to harm him, intentionally, but as drunk as he was all the time he could never really be aware of his actions.. this went on for a while until it eventually just got too bad. she couldn’t leave him with his father anymore. kokichi had been left crying to many times for her to allow. his father left when kokichi was around 6-7, his mother had enough of his behavior and told him to get out. plates were shattered, things were thrown, threats of murder were even brought upon him and his mother. but she did not stand down, she protected her son without fail. he eventually stood down and walked out. of course not without cursing and shouting profanities at the woman. swerving off drunkenly in her car. she felt awful for having her son witness his father like this, so she did anything to make it up to him. years went on and things got better, kokichi was a teenager now, his mother in her forties. money was less tight so she stopped working so many hours and spent more time with her son. they grew slightly apart, as most teenagers do with their parents but they would still be close. they’d watch movies on weekends and joke around with each other a lot, she truly was just a wonderful woman. she’d make lunches for him in brown paper bags because she knows he doesn’t like the schools cafeteria food, he was always embarrassed by this though. (definitely not me projecting onto him whatt noo pshh that’s… that’s totally crazy)

that’s all i can think of right now! maybe i’ll add on more later hehe

[professor-glasses]

questionable quality summary of svern

heehee silly guy with problems

almost every mannerism he expresses is fabricated

his emotional experience is severely stunted and if he's not faking expression then he mostly just. doesn't express anything at All

the latter is an inbuilt feature, the former is a mechanism he developed to Fit In & Mask (which he does very well)

people still think he is a weirdo because he likes to act in ways that go against common sense, but now it's intentional so he enjoys it

absurdly smart and naturally gifted. bsders understand what I mean by this, normal people underestimate my intended scope

severely stunted emotional experience + very smart and good at things which he mostly doesn't value + people finding him strange & offputting, him finding people strange & stupid

= bored always, quickly achieves disillusionment and cynicism and struggles generally to find any value in life. therefore, nihilism

his paternal grandfather has the same issues as him and encouraged him to a) learn to act to deceive ppl (he didn't see why he should bother at first, because Why Should He Have To. seems like a them problem) and b) fake it til you make it (follow even the smallest impulse or thought no matter whether it's "real" in order to make life tolerable. search out whatever gives you some kind of feeling, real or fabricated, no matter how fleeting or temporary

besides being generally alienated and aware that people thought he was weird and creepy, which was annoying but mostly meh, babey svern was also bullied by an older cousin who is tentatively named luke but who I mostly just call The Asshole Cousin. this was not a single motivating factor for anything but did contribute as you expect and provided a source of ongoing drama growing up

for the next parts to make sense, I need to explain that he is (originally) a POKEMON OC, particularly with influence and inspiration from POKEMON RANGER SHADOWS OF ALMIA

not-so-babey svern (preteens and up) started taking advantage of the fact that he owned a ditto which could shapeshift into a copy of him and started running off looking for Excitement while his ditto covered for him. he hated his home life bc even after he started acting "normal" and people were less overtly weird about him he was resentful about the fact this was necessary :) and also he thought most of the people he was around were stupid anyways

girl your emotional walls are high and impenetrable and you trust nobody

also forgot to mention that he was a rich kid. this is kind of important for the general idea of his child/home environment oops

another very random pointless detail he really likes bugs

anyway fast forward to when he's a young adult and he goes to a certain region to study and because he's still bored as fuck he joins the local criminal organisation for funsies. under a fake identity ofc.

if you didn't realise already, "svern" is also not his legal name nor is his usual appearance how he looks as his """"real""""" identity

oh yeah he's also really good at parkour and he likes playing around with dressing in different clothes and dressing up and trying different hair and all kinds of things. wait what was I talking about

um. he joined this criminal organisation and ended up coming into contact with a Weird Fucking Rock that tldr is basically formed by a huge amount of accumulated negative emotions and which for some reason canonically has made a guy so obsessed with it that he dedicated his teenage son to it and changed his son's name in honour of it and spoke. very reverentially about it

The Rock is Weird and Causes Problems. the whole story of the game happens mostly because this rock is Weird and Causes Problems and has Effects on ppl. its name is the Shadow Crystal

anyway svern met the shadow crystal and also got obsessed with it because of the way the thing works. I've written complex lore on this on his blog which is too long and difficult to replicate here rn. tldr it interacts with emotions and desires and bypasses sense so it just. made him inexplicably fascinated. and he was like Fuck Yes finally something in this wretched world worth living for

svern then dedicated Himself to the shadow crystal :-)

this will. definitely not have Consequences

[singsweetmelodies]

katie, i just read your tags on the marauders + f1 and i have to say, you have some great thoughts ✨ the idea of pierre as sirius has changed my life for the better and now i won’t be able to stop thinking about it!!!!!!!

ahhhhh, hi, sol, i love you 😍😍❤️ and omg, i saw this at work and wanted to reply immediately, but couldn't because, well, work. 🙈 and then i got home and got ridiculously distracted by the new DTS trailer and tumblr in general and just... yeah, sorry for being the most distractible person EVER and only getting to you now 🥲🥲🫂

but oh my gosh. OH MY GOSH. pierre as sirius!! bestie i am so glad you see the Vision 😱 because like... the more i'm thinking about it, the more perfect it is, no? sirius is described as "carelessly handsome," which, uh, yes. and also -- sirius' asshole family? it is so easy to make that red bull, oh my god. they tried to break him down, but he got out! he ran away from home! he went to alpine ‼️🙏 AND EVEN BETTER. fanon interpretation of sirius is that he's a bit of a whore (affectionate) and a huge flirt, but quite angsty inside. AND LIKE. doesn't that sound so very much like the fanon interpretation of pierre, too??

and charles as remus 🥺🥺 loyal, lovely remus, but forced to live with a curse that isn't his fault (*cough cough* ferrari, for charles. AND MONACO. omfg.) and of course pierre would be the most loyal friend EVER to charles. outwardly a little shit, but has his back every moment when it counts. and they're hopelessly in love ofc. ahhhhh. it just works so WELL!! piarles as wolfstar... why am i kind of obsessed with that now?!! 😍😍‼️🥺💙

anyways. oh my gosh. thank you so much for this ask, and for giving me the chance to indulge my marauders + f1 feels 😘😘 you're the best! ❤️

(PS: yes. pierre as sirius. my mind keeps going back to this one, too 🥵🙏 and like, that one specific sirius winking gif... you know the one... that just SCREAMS pierre. literally. ahhhhh. in fact:

‼️‼️‼️‼️🙏🙏

[xumoonhao]

rant abt queer as folk under the cut <3 read it if you wanna hear abt the messiest show ive ever seen. youll regret it.

ok. right. so queer as folk…god im still so mad abt it lmao but like i need to get all my thoughts out bc how can one show turn out so bad….like it is LITERALLY 8 episodes that are all less than an hour. its probably only ~7h30m of content and so much of it just fucking sucks like. literally. ok anyways it does start off pretty strong, yknow?? first episode is standard for first episodes. introduces all the characters, gives some insight into their relationships and how they know each other, sets up some things yall know how it goes. and then like idk midway thru the ep is like the catalyst for Everything that happens is a shooter goes into babylon (babylon is the club that was a huge focus for the original series and was tied into the reboot) and kills and injures people because its a hate crime. it involves 2 of the main characters heavily (brodie gets shot in the arm protecting mingus who is performing a drag act on stage) and kills brodies best friend daddius, who is also '''dating''' (i use this term loosely, idk if their relationship was defined as this) noah, who is brodies ex boyfriend/fiance (i think??? idk man noah proposed to brodie with a small toy duck or something and then brodie abandoned him to go to med school bc 'oh no commitment is hard :(((' like fuck off actually but w/e) but it affects most of the main characters overall bc like…ofc it would. anyways the ep then kinda goes much of the way the first ep of the original series did w/the lesbian couple having their babies (twins who we dont know the genders of who are named flotsam and jettsam, named bc of mingus which is what the original series did w/justin naming the lesbian couples baby) who are fathered by brodie via sperm donation, and then everything sucks bc we find out daddius died in the shooting :/ which is like definitely a lot for one episode but its just how it is sometimes. also sorry for recapping the Entire first episode but its like literally the only episode that has a coherent storyline so. yeah.

anyways, this made me think the series would focus on like the characters and their healing from this traumatic event and trying to fondly remember their friend and just in generally trying to move on from it and like. it really…isnt like that at all?? like it is for a couple of eps, dont get me wrong, but after the main people spread daddius' ashes the show really moves away from like anything meaningful in terms of the characters healing or literally doing anything good for themselves or each other. like its really incredible. so many of the eps have absolutely MEANINGLESS relationship progress (except julian and noah. theyre the only solid couple) bc literally. none of the relationships fucking matter even a little tiny bit.

i will give a small rundown of things. please bear with me. brodie is the 'main' character (main in quotes bc most of the characters are main characters but brodie is definitely the focal guy bc all the characters are more or less connected thru him) is just a complete asshole. like literally the worst character which is shown to us a bit by way of how he treats mingus (mingus is 17 going on 18 btw. they fall in love w/brodie bc, and this a direct quote, 'he ate his ass in the bathroom' at the club so now theyre in love bc mingus is a teenager and everything is love at that age) which is completely blowing them off (instead of being the mature one bc hes an adult) rather than telling mingus how he feels before he and mingus end up having sex. like wtf?? literally hated that but anyways brodie gets WORSE bc at that point hes just shown to be a fuckboy which yeah definitely sucks but w/e its standard. he could be redeemed from that. but then he just goes on to show how much of a bad person he is by verbally abusing all his friends, manipulating them, lying to them, taking literally ZERO ACCOUNTABILITY for anything, and then apologizing to ppl in the worst way bc when they dont fall at his feet to forgive him, he starts a whole new fight and just ends up being even worse. like i hate brodie so much…god….like he literally did one good thing the entire season which was saving mingus from getting shot. thats literally IT hes a piece of shit the entire rest of the time!!! AHHHHH it makes me so MAD why is the main guy i cannot stand him.

god. it also makes No Sense bc there are scenes that show him and mingus to be like…a thing kind of bc mingus likes him. they really likes him but brodie simply does not care so mingus does end up being with other people which is like…i think at first an effort to make brodie jealous but it literally ends up in nothing which like…alright?? it doesnt really serve a purpose other than being an excuse for mingus being diagnosed with HIV at the end of the series :/ anyways back to mingus and brodie, theres a scene between them in the last ep of mingus being framed by angel wings (parallels a scene from the first ep) which make me think they were going to be a couple, yknow??? like yeah its gross and i hate it but, thru whats been shown, it would make sense. from a storytelling perspective, it makes sense.

but fucking SIKE lmao bc brodie is in love w/ruthie </3 ruthie and brodie do have history tho, so like…ok. they dated in high school before ruthies transition but then broke up bc yknow. things were hard. ruthie was confused back then and wasnt out as trans to anyone yknow how it is. but the thing abt everything that is so. SO confusing is that brodie is gay and ruthie is. a lesbian. but they are in love bc of feelings they never dealt with when they were kids??? EVEN THO RUTHIE HAS A PARTNER AND CHILDREN WITH THAT PARTNER??? but it gets even WORSE bc hey. hey guess fucking what. ruthies partner is cheating on ruthie WITH. BRODIES. MOTHER.

literally…i could not make this shit up if i TRIED. it is absolutely WILD and i hate it all i hate this show it is the messiest show and all of the characters SUCK like brodie literally deadnames ruthie to her face in the middle of a fight they have but they still get their dumbass fucking romantic moment, ending out the series by kissing in the rain like oh. my god. i wish i were dead i wish this show didnt EXIST.

idk if theres anything else to say. i dont wanna think abt this show anymore. kill me

[disgruntledspacedad]

The Rules of Engagement (3/5)

The Better Love Series

pairing: Javier Peña x fem!reader/ofc (Ears)

summary: (slow-burn, sexual tension, angst, a little bit of h/c in later chapters) He’s a DEA agent. You work for Centra Spike. Peña’s not your boss, exactly, but you’ve been fwb long enough that certain people are starting to think of you as An Item, and that just won’t do. 

words: 3.4k 

warnings: 18+ for alcohol, language, smut, violence, body horror, general trauma. Please, please heed the warnings on this chapter, guys. It gets pretty intense.

a/n: Unbeta’d. I know I said this was going to be three chapters, but I lied. Sorry, my dudes - this one got away from me. Inspo credit goes to @tiffdawg​, as always.

part one | part two | part three | part four | part five

MASTERLIST

Well, fuck. You bite back a massive sigh.

You really, really don’t want to walk through that door.

It’s been a month, and you life has changed profoundly.

For one, you’re not at the office as much anymore - Stechner had made good on his promise to consider you for more flyovers, and boy, has Centra Spike been busy. Some new vigilante group is terrorizing Medellín, and while it’s not Search Bloc’s priority to go after them, they’ve undeniably kept Pablo and his sicarios busy. The radio frequencies are hot right now, and you’ve been doing eight, sometimes ten flights a week. 

You absolutely love it. The hours are less predictable and definitely more shitty, but listening to a radio from the cockpit of a plane is much more fun that listening to a radio in a stuffy basement office, so you consider it a fair trade.

It keeps your brain busy, too.

Your social life has taken a massive kick to the nuts. Ana is back at university, and you miss her more than you thought you would. You’ve reverted to communicating with Emilio with gestures and smiles more than words. It’s nice because he’s nice, but you miss actual conversation, stilted as it was. Ana wasn’t all that bad, either.

And then there’s Javi.

You haven’t spoken to him since That Morning, not even a polite 'how are you?' in the hallway. Granted, you’re not seeing him as often anymore, given your new position and hours, but then again, you haven’t exactly sought him out, either.

The memory claws at you every time you relive it - and you relive it often. That anger, that wounded expression. The slammed door, his retreating footsteps. Each time you’re in that building, the walls seem to close in on you, and you have to stop yourself from looking for him, actively keep your gaze from roaming straight to his desk.

God, as if you could make it more awkward.

You’d had one nasty conversation with Murphy about a week after the incident - you’d told him in no uncertain terms that he could either mind his own business or fuck right off, you didn’t care which. He’d left you be, throwing his hands in the air and muttering something about how “you two deserve each other.”

Asshole.

Still, that aborted conversation haunts you - so many aborted conversations haunt you - and you wonder what would have happened if you’d just taken the bull by the horns and addressed the issue with Javi head on.

I’m sorry you caught me rubbing one off on the morning after you almost died, Peña. I can assure you, it won’t happen again. Your friendship means the world to me.

Yeah, right.

God, though, but you miss him.

You miss him so much it aches, a gaping hole that reaches right down to the core of you, but there’s nothing to be done about it. You’d fucked this one completely and thoroughly - any chance of restoring your friendship had drained away with the shower-water, and the more time you spend fretting over it, the more awkward - and pathetic - it would be to say anything.

So, you’d cut your losses, held your head high, and tried not to waste too much time wishing you’d have just kept your fucking fantasies to yourself.

Now, though, you’ve got no choice.

You’d been on Centra Spike’s early morning flight, just another routine scan over Medellín. The shift wasn’t intended to be more than a training run for you, but as luck would have it, the Medellín cartel’d had a busy night, and you’d been caught in the crossfire.

Your plane had just touched down half an hour ago, and now you’re standing on the front steps of the embassy building, fingering a shoebox cassette player loaded with a freshly taped recording full of juicy intel destined for the desk of DEA Agent Javier Peña - an entire, private conversation featuring none other than Verdugo himself.

You’d know that voice anywhere. You’ve studied it for hours, what few snatches you’d been able to glean from the embassy archives. It’s almost as if Verdugo is smart enough to steer clear of the city, or to just avoid phone conversations all together, the absolute fuckwad.

Until early this morning.

On the plane, you’d intercepted a new signal and tapped in on a whim, intending to practice your Spanish more than anything, but what you’d overheard was a fucking gold mine of information.

Verdugo is in Medellín. The sicarios are getting ready to move Escobar. He didn’t say where - fucking bastard knows not to spill all of the beans in one conversation - but apparently the plan requires a rendezvous in El Centro first. Verdugo is en route, and will be there until the next morning.

You’d worked frantically all night, tracing and retracing the signal, triangulating potential addresses, then back-tracking to account for environmental distortion. Each calculation had led you to the same place - an unassuming little house right smack in the middle of Medellín.

Bingo.

“You take it in, Aarons.” Torres had declined your offer to do the honors. “It’s your intel.”

So here you are, bleary-eyed and running on less than two hours of sleep, cassette player clenched tightly to your chest, summoning up all of your courage just to go speak with your ex... well, ex whatever-the-fuck Peña is.

‘This is your job,’ you remind yourself fiercely. ‘You can do this.’

As pep-talks go, it isn’t very effective.

Fuck it. You toss your head back, wishing you’d had time to at least grab a cup of coffee on the way in, and breeze around the corner.

“Agent Peña.”

He glances up lazily, thoroughly uninterested in whatever you have to say. When he realizes it’s you, he blinks once, dropping his cigarette in the ashtray and sitting up to eyeball you with a wary expression.

"What can I do for you?” he asks cooly.

You remember him saying that once before, but the context was totally different.

You shake it off. “Centra Spike has new intel that you’ll want to see right away.”

He purses his lips, tilting his head to indicate the growing pile of bullshit on his desk. “You can leave it here.”

Oh, so that’s how it is, then?

“I can’t.” You pin him with a stare, and he meets your gaze evenly, raising his eyebrows in silent challenge. You clear your throat and clarify. “I won’t.”

He scoffs as you carefully rest cassette tape on his desk, along with a map of El Centro. “We intercepted a four minute conversation with Verdugo this morning. He’s here.” You point to the safe house on the map, which you’ve already circled in red ink. “Feo and Limón are with him. They’re leaving early tomorrow.”

Peña frowns down at the spot where your finger rests. “And can you corroborate that information?”

Oh, the motherfucker. “I verified his voice personally, Peña,” you say carefully, doing your damndest to keep the annoyance from your tone. It’s well within his right to ask questions, after all. “It’s a direct match for the audio samples we have.” You tap the tape for emphasis. “You’re welcome to listen for yourself.”

He doesn’t make a move for a long time. Something hot and painful burns in your gut as you wait.

God, he knows you, knows you better than anybody else in on this goddamned continent.  He knows that you know your shit, that you want to catch Escobar as desperately as he does. And this evidence that you have spread across his desk, recorded on tape and marked plainly in red ink, is irrefutable, undeniable - it’s a huge break. He knows that, too.

His apathy is palpable, and it’s driving you up the fucking wall.

When he finally glances up at you, it’s with a doubtful little smirk on his face. “Hmm.”

And oh, wow, you’re shocked by just how much that hurts.

All your life, from the moment you were born into a family of brothers, you’ve had to fight tooth and nail to be taken seriously. It was a fact of life as early as you can remember - ‘look after your sister,’ or, ’she’s just a girl,’ or ‘wow, you’re really great at math, for a woman!’ You’d settled on your career as an analyst because you’d wanted it, not because you’d had something to prove, but still, the military is a male-dominated field, and from the start, the odds had been stacked against you.  Landing this CIA gig had been the achievement of a fucking lifetime. Still, the bar is set high in the Colombia, and it’s set that much higher for a woman. You’re well aware of this; you’re reminded every single day.

Point being, you’re used to defending yourself and your abilities; it comes as natural as breathing.  

But until now, you’ve never had to fight this battle with Peña. He’d taken you at face value from the moment he'd laid eyes on you, treating you like just another operative. Sure, he might take a crack at you every now and again, but that's all in good fun, and you’ve never been one to shy away from a laugh.

Christ, you never realized just how much that respect meant to you until suddenly, it’s gone.

“If you have something to say about my skills and qualifications, Agent Peña, then I suggest you say it.” You lean over his desk, speaking quietly, enunciating each syllable with deadly precision. “Otherwise, I think we both know that it’s in the best interest of Search Bloc and the Colombian people that we collaborate quickly, so we can put boots on the ground and land this motherfucker behind bars where he belongs.”

Peña’s eyes narrow, and he cocks his head, studying you. You meet his gaze, biting back a snarl. You won’t back down. You won’t allow him to intimidate you.

When he nods sharply and reaches for his phone, you know you’ve won.

♠

Ten minutes later, you’re situated in a conference room with Peña, Steve Murphy, Martinez, and a couple of the other higher ups of Search Bloc whose names you haven’t memorized. Your maps are spread over the table, your tape displayed for all to see, and every eye is on you.

“Verdugo is here,” you say, leaning over the map to indicate the marked house. “He and his entourage arrived late last night, and they’re planning to leave early tomorrow morning.”

“Plenty of time to get a team together.” Murphy interjects, glancing between you and Peña with open curiosity.

You narrow your gaze at him. Drama-mongering bastard.

Peña’s not moving. He’s standing with his hip cocked toward the desk, frowning down at the map with his fingers curled to his chin like he’s totally oblivious to everything happening around him.

You know he’s not, though. That’s Javi’s thinking face, the one he makes when he wants people to shut the fuck up and forget about him until he can work something out. You’re pretty familiar with that one.

The others are babbling in Spanish, discussing logistics and the likelihood of this being another trap.

It’s not. You know this deep in your bones. You’d heard that conversation in real time, had translated, triangulated it.

This is legit.

You’ve just decided to leave them to it when Javi snaps his eyes open.

“I agree with Aarons,” he announces out of nowhere. You’re startled by the confidence in his tone. Curious, you glance up, but it’s difficult to get a read on him. He’s pinning every person in the room except you with a hard stare. “We need to move out now.”

Several of the others make noises of protest, but Peña shuts them all down, one by one. Finally, his eyes flicker up to meet yours, just for a brief second, but there’s something different in his gaze, something new and heavily guarded.

You think it might be an apology.

“Let’s end this.”

♠

He’s on a plane to Medellín within an hour, wearing that stupid bullet proof vest. For just a split second, you wish that you were going, too. You don’t have enough experience, though - you’re not an agent; you haven’t handled a gun since basic. You’d be useless in a real fight, a liability, even.

Still, you feel some ownership in this operation, today more than ever. You don’t even try to kid yourself about Javi anymore, either. Those fucking feelings haven’t faded in a month, not a bit, not even after the awkward conversation you’d had in his office.

‘But he stood up for you, too, afterward,’ something whispers in the back of your mind. You replay that little glance in the conference room over and over as you watch Search Bloc board the plane.

He’s looking for you this time, standing on the ramp with his eyes shaded like he knows you’ll be waiting. He doesn’t nod and you don’t wave, but you make eye contact for a lingering moment, and again, there’s something in his expression that you don’t recognize.

Then the plane takes off down the runway, and you feel as if your heart is swooping away with it.

♠

You volunteer for the late shift at work, monitoring the radio lines in case something comes up. It’s an unusually quiet night, as if all of Bogotá collectively holds its breath, and you mostly spend it watching the clock, calculating the hours in your head.

One to land in Medellín. Two more to mobilize the men. Another half to get in location.

From there, your speculation gets fuzzy. There’s no way to predict the outcome once Verdugo is engaged. Javi’s told you a million stories, each more unbelievable than the last - car chases and rooftop shootouts, standoffs in the street, a fistfight in a church sanctuary, bodies of children littering dark alleyways… you cut off the recollections. They aren’t doing you any favors.

Verdugo is a dangerous man. Anything could happen.

By seven am, your brain is mush and your eyes are hyper-focused in that bleary way that happens when you’ve gone too long without sleep. Your third cup of coffee has gone cold, and people are starting to trickle in. You wave half-heartedly to Torres as you slip out of your headset, rubbing your fingers over your scalp to ease the tension that comes from wearing heavy earphones all night. A shower sounds nice, you decide, and maybe a quick nap afterward.

Somebody will page you with news.

Getting out of the building does a lot to wake you up. There’s something oppressive about the CNP headquarters that seems to abate when you step into the streets of Bogotá. The city buzzes with life even in the early morning, and air is warm in a way that seems to energize rather than sedate. Optimism is easier to invoke as you walk down the street in broad daylight.

Javi had looked at you, at least. He’d listened. He’ll call in to the office as soon as he can. Your intel was good, and they’ve flushed out the rat, he’d promised you that.

Everything will be okay.

You round the corner of CRA 70 and Circular, waving to Emilio, who is working the register of the pharmacy today.

“Orejas!” He shouts, reaching below the counter to hold aloft another bottle of aguardiente. “¡Mira! Solo para ti!”

You grin back at him, raising your voice to shout a greeting, and then, with absolutely no warning, the store explodes.

A loud boom.

A whoosh of impossible heat.

A massive orange fireball billowing from the windows.

Your body flying, flying through the air.

Bright blue sky, and then darkness.

♠

You find yourself lying flat on your back in the middle of the street. Your ears are ringing. There’s a pat-pattering in the air, soft like falling rain.

You blink hard.

It’s not rain, you realize dizzily.

It’s fucking ash.

The air is dark with it, hot and heavy. It coats your tongue and stings your eyes. It’s hard to catch a breath. Your throat hurts, your chest aches. You cough weakly. The smell is terrible, acrid and bitter like burned metal. You can taste it on your tongue.

Slowly, you tense your muscles. Your chest is still burning, but there’s nothing sharp to suggest a serious injury. Your back is sore, your head fuzzy.

You sit up, wincing a little, relieved to realize that you’ve just had the wind knocked from you. You’ll have some bruises tomorrow, but that’s all.

Sound slowly filters in. The hiss and crackle of flame. A shout in the distance. Further away, a wailing siren.

Reality slams into you all at once.

Emilio!

You stand, wobbling more than you think you should, but you push past it. Reality seems to pitch and roil, as if the ground is hitching its breath beneath you. Rubble coats the street, dust clouds the air.

Oh god.

A gaping, smoking crater is all that’s left of Emilio’s pharmacy. The windows are blown out of the businesses on either side, their outer walls bowing under the pressure. Your apartment on the top floor is demolished, the roof caving in, flames licking at the the collapsed floors.

You gasp one long, shuddering breath, taking it all in, and then you’re running, sort of, picking your way through hunks of concrete and twisted metal.

“Emilio! Emilio!”

Your voice is hoarse, the world hushed. Nothing sounds quite right. Your legs are shaking and you can’t catch your breath. Some of the rubble is hot to the touch, and you feel like you’re moving underwater, slow and awkward and stupid.

You approach what’s left of the store, and the smell hits you first. Like cooked meat - charred, greasy, heavy.

You press your hand to your mouth to stifle a scream.

You found Emilio. He’s pinned beneath part of the collapsed roof. You look away quickly, but not before you catch a glimpse of blackened flesh, of bone, blood, and pink frothy tissue.

Acid rises in your throat, and you stumble to your knees, stomach clenching painfully into your ribs as you vomit onto the street. It goes on and on, over and over for an eternity, tears and snot and bile and ash leaking mingled down your face until there is nothing left in you to expel.

The encroaching wail of a siren draws you to your senses. You glance up, suddenly painfully aware of your situation. The ceiling is arching above you, just to your right, and it’s creaking ominously. The fires are still burning, and your shirt is clinging painfully hot against your back. You stagger to your feet once again, dizzy, almost drunkenly. A small crowd has gathered, pointing and gawking, calling out to you in Spanish that you are far, far too overwhelmed to translate.

Gasping, you raise your hands and side-step away, careful of the debris that litters the street around you.

A firetruck arrives on the scene, squalling to a stop between you and the onlookers, and you leap at the opportunity, ducking down the nearest alleyway before anybody can follow.

♠

You aren’t sure how much time you waste in the alleyways of Bogotá.

Seconds?

Minutes?

The time after the explosion is all a blur, and you run until you literally can’t anymore, until you’re doubled over and wheezing, coughing, hacking, panting.

Some primal survival instinct clicks in your brain then, and suddenly, your mind is clear. You glance around, swiping at your cheeks and brushing the ash from your shirt.

Now what?

You take a shaking breath and think.

Okay, first order of business, you’re absolutely disgusting. You need a shower before you can even think about doing anything productive.

Your bathroom just went up in flames, along with all of your clothes. Your heart clenches as you think of Ana - she’s at university, so that’s out. The embassy has a nice bathroom, but no showers that you’re aware of.

There’s only one place you know to go, and that’s Javi’s apartment.

You glance up at the sky. The sun is still pretty low - it can’t have been more than an hour since you’d left work, and that was around seven am. Javi obviously isn’t home, and you don’t have a key, but if you hurry, there’s still a chance that you could catch Murphy before he leaves his flat.

It’s a long shot, but you decide there’s nothing to lose for trying.

[ryuichirou]

I saw one very stupid post on my dash about how snk is OBVIOUSLY nazi propaganda and trying to convert all of us into imperialists and white supremacists. tbh it’s not the first time I’ve seen that kind of stuff and probably won't be the last, but for some reason this time it gave me a lot of anxiety (I got wordy, I'mma need to send another ask, sorry)

(part 2) It's been more than half and hour and I still feel this awful sensation in my chest. It's just overall pretty fucked how to have something you hold dear being misinterpreted in the worst way possible, and I was just wondering what are your thoughts on this situation or how you deal with people claiming all sorts of awful shit.

(part 3) I imagine that as an artist some people probably direct their issues with snk towards you, 'cause I don't even post that much fanart and I've gotten anons "trying to educate me" on why this series is so wrong, after posting drawings. Of course, you don't have to reply, maybe the topic makes you anxious too and I don't want to bother you, so sorry for the depressing topic (｡•́︿•̀｡)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Tiiish, I want to hug you, I’m really sorry that this happened to you. I hope you’re feeling a little bit better now.

Like we already mentioned a while ago, when we were talking about that darn article, after we read through it and did a little fact checking (and I mean it when I say a little, because there weren’t many facts to check), we stopped caring about it. It’s not research at all, just a manipulatively written speculation on Yam’s motives and worldview, but sadly, people easily believe these accusations because they hate SnK and want to find a valid reason to hate it and shit on its fanbase. Because “I hate it because it’s nazi propaganda” sounds much cooler than “I hate it because it’s popular”, doesn’t it?

It’s easier to ignore the article itself though, and it’s much harder not to think about tumblr posts or those Twitter threads that get very popular (although there are a lot of bots on twitter, trust me…), and it’s especially difficult to ignore it when it’s specifically directed at you. But the only thing that these people deserve is a good ol’ block and (if they’re getting too offensive and abusive) a report for harassment. The thing is, their opinion doesn’t matter: it won’t change SnK’s story, it won’t affect its success and popularity, it doesn’t affect anything other than our mood (temporarily lol). Because they aren’t critics who actually give a flying fuck about the subject matter, they’re just random assholes with a hateboner for SnK, who sit in their echochamber and discuss the same shit over and over again. And if they’re “fans” of the SnK, it’s just them “consuming it critically” 🙄 such a convenient phrase and so easy to abuse.

If we think about these accusations again… they’re so damn nonsensical, it’s almost amazing. I’m not going to reread it or to make a proper counterpoint article out of this ask, so this is just based on how we remember these accusations.

Like, what part of SnK approves and pushes the idea of imperialism in any way? When the entire idea of the story is that war is bad? When people like Onyankopon, whose homeland was invaded by Marley, exist? And it’s never portrayed as a good thing? Having only one country dominating the world’s situation is literally the main reason why everyone’s suffering??

And come to think of it, Isayama is one of the few manga artists to kind of sort of openly critique Japan: he literally drew Kiyomi losing her cool and drooling while thinking about all the profit and wealth she would get from the deal with Paradis. Why do people never talk about that? What is it, if not a critique of greedy and two-faced nature of people from Azumabito clan, who are heavily implied to represent Japan? I don’t read a lot of manga in general, but do you know how many mangakas I’ve seen who directly talked shit about Japan while being Japanese? Two. Excluding Isayama.

Isayama is clearly invested in the Western culture and he understands the World’s History. He understands that political relationships are complex and that there are no “bad” or “good” countries. I don’t want to make assumptions about how much perspective of the world’s relationships the average person from Japan has, but I still feel like Yams has a pretty good understanding of it. He did his research for the subject matter, and while it’s obviously not perfect, it’s clearly there.

These people also claim that SnK is anti-Korean and anti-Semitic, but if Hetalia had taught me anything, it is that if the story has or used to have any anti-Korean undertones, the Korean readers wouldn’t want to have anything to do with it. They would be the first people to ditch the manga, they would be the first people to critique SnK, and rightfully so. They burnt Uniqlo clothes, their overall domestic policy is pretty anti-Japanese, so there’re literally zero reasons for them not to destroy SnK if they see it as anti-Korean. But the size of the Korean SnK fandom suggests otherwise, doesn’t it.

And the “big noses = Jewish caricature” argument, seriously? How anti-Semitic can you get? Who the fuck looks at people and goes “oh, those have big noses, bet they’re caricature of Jews”?? Sorry I’m getting heated lol The argument about “Asian artists portray Westerners with prominent noses because that’s what we look like to them” has been done a lot of times, I’m not going to go over than again.

And god forbid Isayama to use Germany and Europe to draw a story where his characters are (approximately) Germans and Europeans! Let’s go fetch our pitchforks to punish Isayama for using their aesthetic to make his story look more believable and authentic, right? “Oh, those areas where they hold Eldians resemble places from real life”, like no shit???? Ofc they would??? That’s what references for making the story more grounded are used for??? If I were to write a story about a fictional place based on a real one that I don’t live in, I’d use some visual references to help me to make it more believable??? Why do I even need to explain that?

In my previous post I talked about the armbands and ghetto and stuff, but I’ll reiterate: even if there are thematic similarities, it doesn’t mean that the story mirrors our history. And it doesn’t mean that there is an analogy, since Eldian’s situation is quiiiite different than what Jewish people had to go through. It’s just thematic similarities. And it still doesn’t plant any specific idea in the reader’s head, other than “having people shoved into ghettos with 0 civil rights is a horrible thing”, and I can’t comprehend what’s anti-Semitic or imperialistic about it. Also I’m sorry, but nazis are not the only people who genocided a bunch of people, breaking news. Nor did they invent armbands. Same goes for Japan in WWII.

And now for my favourite argument: Erwin is nazi because his name is Erwin and he was born on the same day than some nazi guy died… I won’t even talk about why this idea is hilariously stupid, I just want to appreciate the level of nitpicking that’s going on here.

So… yeah. People who have nothing else to do but to complain about the show they hate don’t matter. And people who consider themselves a part of the SnK fandom and still say this bs (yep, there are people who do that) are huge hypocrites. The heck are they doing in this fandom then?? Of course, any story is up to interpretation, but this is so backwards?

Sorry for rambling so much… anyways. We’re happy enough not to encounter any hate related to this topic, but we think it’s because we ship Ereri and people already hate us for that, so the majority of shit we get is related to that, I guess we’re a lost cause for them. We’ll see if anything happens after this post though.

But once again, I’m very sorry that you had to go through this. Please remember that this isn’t personal at all, and people who harass strangers on the internet just want to flex their high moral ground while acting like complete assholes. You don’t have to explain anything to them, you don’t have to talk to them, you don’t have to listen to them or give them any attention. I hope you’ll never stumble upon anything like this; but if you ever do, please block them, don’t even bother reading their attempts at “educate” you. Isn’t worth it.

Please have a good day, Tish. And everyone who’s reading this reply.

[snarkwrites]

summer sizzle | disaster, steve harrington [m]

[ prompts used ]

** again, all of these were found on different lists across the internet. literally none of them belong to me and i will have to try finding the lists these all came from at some point. credits to anyone who made these prompt lists **

Disaster + “S-stop staring at me like that!” + Say My Name + comfort sex + One Small Kiss, Pulling Away For An Instant, Then Devouring Each Other

[ authors notes ]

This is the alternate universe to my whole thing with Steve and Charlotte. At some point, I do plan to write an actual fic for them. In the meantime, I’m gonna build things up through one shots and stuff. If anyone’s curious, pls ask away, my ask box is open.

[ warnings ]

18+ only. All children, leave the room. I repeat, all children, leave the room. underage drinking a lil bit, biting / leaving hickies, body fluids, oral [ both parties give and recieve ], protected sex and that’s pretty much it.

[ pairing / fandom ]

steve harrington x ofc, charlotte granger

[ tagging ]

@rampagewriting​​ | @chasingeverybreakingwave​​

[ tag list - masterlist - about my writing ]

                                     D I S A S T E R - steve harrington x ofc,

“You really should slow down with that.” Steve popped up beside me and it only made me that much more determined to chug the bottle of rum in my hands. If I had alcohol in my mouth, I didn’t have to try conversing. I didn’t risk just grabbing his face in my hands and laying a kiss on him that would only result in making everything even more awkward between the two of us than it already is.

I sat the bottle down on the tabletop firmly, wiping at my mouth with the back of my hand as I swayed a little to the music. I could feel the rabbit ears on my headband slipping and I swore, reaching up. Steve swatted my hands away and reached over, fixing the way they stood, bending one of them ever so slightly. He stepped a little closer, the limited space between us filling with heavy tension.

It seemed to do that a lot lately.

He nodded to the crowded party. “I thought you came with Byers to pick up Nancy.”

I shrugged and raised the bottle to my lips, taking another drink, swallowing it down before I answered quietly, “I decided to stay. I didn’t want to feel like a third wheel on my own date.”

As neutral as I tried to sound when saying it, I failed miserably. The sarcasm laced into my words and Steve’s head tilted slightly as he just… stared at me. Like he was in deep thought and dazed.

“If you’re going to be weird, I’m going to go do keg stands.” I muttered the words quietly and took a step forward. That step put me body to body with Steve whose hands immediately settled on my hips as his eyes roamed and he didn’t bother trying to hide it.

“Bad date?” Steve asked, giving me a bit of a weak smile as our eyes met.

I snorted. “More like a complete fucking disaster from the word go.”

Steve snickered and I pouted at him, lips poking out.

“I’m glad to see my sheer misery makes you laugh. Asshole.” I started to try and side step but he stopped me, staring deep into my eyes again and not saying anything.

Until finally, he did. Pulling me closer because a crowd rushed past, whooping and hollering because someone was about to do keg stands again in the next room. I blew at a bright red strand of loose bangs that flopped into my eye and tilted my head slightly, looking at him.

“It’s not your misery, okay? I was laughing cos..” Steve trailed off, eyes settling fixed on the floor beneath our feet. I raised a brow and honestly, I meant to just walk away, beyond done with the night by this point, but something about the way he fell silent had my interest piqued.

“Why?” I asked the question as my hand settled on my hip. Steve was staring at the black velvet strapless bodysuit I was wearing, at the fishnets covering my legs, anything but my actual face. Distracted, as usual. I rolled my eyes and cleared my throat impatiently.

“ The fact that Nancy just broke up with me. I don’t know, I guess it’s just my reaction to a shitty night.” the explanation sounded feeble, but I said nothing.

It hit me then, what he’d just said.

I eyed him in concern, going quiet. I took a few big back to back sips of the rum in my hand and gritted my teeth, shaking my head all over again at the burn as I glanced at the bottle for a second or two, just to keep from staring at him like an ass, as is my tendency as of late.

And yes, I feel like the world’s most horrible friend for it.

“They say this stuff goes down smoother the more you sip it. I call bullshit.” I mumbled, mostly to myself, mostly just to keep that heavy tension from creeping back in between Steve and I all over again.

Steve reached for the bottle and raised it to his lips, shotgunning a generous portion as he shrugged.

“Fucking show off.” I grumbled, reaching for the bottle and nearly falling forward as I did so.

Steve stepped closer, hands at my side after sitting the bottle of rum down on the table nearby. “Are you alright?”

“Shh. Don’t kill my buzz.” I held a finger to his lips as I giggled a little bit. Someone put on Aerosmith and I bounced on my feet a little, grinning from ear to ear about it. When my eyes met his again, he was staring at me, an almost thoughtful expression on his face.

“S-stop staring at me like that!” I drawled, starting to sway my hips a little to the song playing in the background.

“What if I don’t wanna?” Steve practically mumbled the question, his gaze growing more intent. Roaming even more. Lingering on my body just long enough to set my body to burning immediately.

I threw my head back and laughed at what he said, the laughter dying on my lips as my eyes met his again and I realized that he wasn’t joking. He had his most serious facial expression on. And he was stepping closer, towering over me just  barely. Fingertips digging into the thin black velvet fabric covering my body.  His hips rubbing right against mine, making me swallow hard and sort of melt into him just so I didn’t have to look at him and increase the risk of him figuring out exactly what he was doing to me at the moment.

“Tonight is really a disaster, huh?” I managed to mumble, mostly for lack of anything better to say and wanting to vanquish the tension before it got so fucking thick I couldn’t breathe. I could already feel my legs getting a little  more wobbly, my thighs getting just a little slippery. Just the thought of him… In that way… had me burning up all over in a heated blush for at least the tenth time since he’d wandered over an hour or two ago.

I’ve shoved this thing down so deep that now that it’s bubbling up to the surface, it takes literally all my willpower from stopping it.

Steve continued to stare, his gaze fixing on my lips as he licked his own. He swallowed hard and my eyes settled on the way his throat bobbed. I did my best not to indulge myself and imagine dancing my lips down his throat.

“The night’s not over yet.” his voice almost sounded husky. Laced with something I couldn’t quite figure out.

When he finally said it, he was standing so close that I was pressed against him, bodies rubbing together lightly. Mostly to steady myself in the stupid heels I chose to wear with my costume, I raised my arms, wrapping them around his neck.

“True, but.. Our dates did leave together.” I pointed out the fact, sighing quietly. I mean… I’m the one who told Jonathan to worry about getting Nancy home safe, that I wanted to stay and hang out with Briar and a few of the other girls and that I’d be fine.

,, you told him to leave you because maybe you’re starting to realize that he’s more into Nancy. So you’re cutting your losses.” my brain reminded me. I literally have no reason to be bitter right now, and yet.. Here I go.

Between Nancy dating Steve even knowing our history and how I had a crush on him and how tense things were when he stopped being friends with me.. And her suddenly having so much to do with Jonathan right when I’ve decided that maybe it’s time to let go of old crushes… I’d almost swear she was doing it deliberately if I didn’t know otherwise.

“I told Nancy to go.” Steve admitted, shrugging a little, a weak smile as he looked down at me. “She didn’t wanna be here with me anyway.”

I bit my lip, nodding at him as I found my own eyes settling on thick lips. Lips I desperately wanted to kiss.

My fingertips seemed to grow minds of their own, toying with the hair at the nape of his neck.

In the room behind us, the noise seemed to grow, people were getting rowdier. But all I could do was continue to stare,  trying to figure out why he’d even come over to me in the first place.

“Honestly, I could tell Jonathan had other things on his mind tonight. I was just in the way.” I shrugged it off and took a deep breath. More people pushed past us, putting us even closer together. I bit back a quiet whimper and felt myself starting to blush. He chuckled and gazed down at me a few seconds, that look in his eye all over again.

“What? Do I have lipstick on my teeth?” I asked the question and raised my hand, prepared to wipe at my mouth. This red lipstick, while pretty, was a huge pain in my ass. But it made the costume seem even more appropriate… Or inappropriate. Whatever.

“No, I was just thinking.. Something Nancy said after she broke up with me and called basically everything about us bullshit before demanding to leave… About you.”

I swallowed hard, my breath catching in my  throat, but as best as I could, I tried to downplay. To feign an air of total neutrality. My best blank look on my face, casual.. Appearing not to be affected by Steve and his.. Everything.

“Yeah?” I asked, walking a finger up and down the front of his black button front shirt. He squirmed slightly and kept staring down at me intently, letting his gaze drop to my finger for a lingering distracted few seconds. The tension in the air was getting so much thicker. I couldn’t stop it, I couldn’t deny it.

Shit, did I sound breathless? The thought came but I shoved it out, clearing my throat, guiding his gaze so that he had to look at me. “What’d she say?” I finally managed to ask the question, trying to steer this whole… Bizarre moment away from the heavy tension it was fast approaching.

“It wasn’t anything bad.” Steve said it quickly and I bit my lip, waiting.

“After she told me that everything was bullshit, she told me that I was with the wrong girl and I’m kind of…” he trailed off again, leaning down, his face getting closer to mine. My breath caught again and this time, I didn’t try hiding the fact. “Yeah?” the word came quick and clumsy as my face inched closer to his.

And my lips promptly brushed against the corner of his mouth clumsily. I drew back quick but his hands caught on either side of my face, pulling my lips directly back to his. “Where are you goin, hm?” he half growled the question against my lips as his mouth crashed against and hungrily devoured mine. One of his hands dragged up my back, catching in my hair, tangling in it as he gripped the back of my head and his other hand rested on my cheek, a thumb trailing lazily along my cheek after the kiss broke.

We slowly pulled apart, staring at one another wide eyed. He was quick to lean back in, chuckling as he bit his bottom lip and stared hungrily at mine a second or two. “She was right. It has always been you, I just…” he dragged his hand through his hair as he took several shaky breaths.

It suddenly seemed to occur to him just how little I was wearing and the next thing I knew, he was shedding his blazer and putting it around me, even going as far as to button a few buttons.

“Steve.” I whined, pouting up at him as he shook his head no. “No, nope. That costume is, “ he gestured to me, “Too fucking much. What are you supposed to be anyway?”

“A bunny.” I was intentionally being vague. Honestly, I figured he’d put two and two together.

Apparently, he did not.

“I’ve been wearing this the entire time you’ve been standing here and you’re just now seeing it? Ya know.. If I were easily offended, I could take offense to that. I happen to like it. And it belonged to my grandma Ginger.” I did a little twirl to sort of show off the costume, maybe rubbing it in just a little.

“Yeah, I don’t think so.. Bunnies are covered in fur and their noses wiggle, Charlotte. That is.. Fuck me, it is something, alright...” he was tugging at his hair again and gazing down at me and I succumbed to the fit of giggles that had been threatening to take over for at least a minute or two by this point.

Typical Steve… Getting so caught in a moment that he really doesn’t notice his surroundings until he does. Then he’s in sheer awe or shock.

“Anyway, I was in the middle of something.” Steve was trying to get whatever he was making an attempt to say out and I stood there, head tilted slightly, watching him and barely hiding the little smile I had as I did it. “You were, if you’d kindly just get to it.”

“Maybe we could do this outside? Where I can hear myself think?” Steve pleaded and I gave a nod. I honestly assumed he’d let me walk out. No. The next thing I know, I’m being scooped up and carried out the door of Billy Hargrove’s house and he didn’t put me down until we were standing beside his BMW.

“Better now?” I couldn’t hide my amusement at this point.

He stuck his tongue out at me and took a few long and shaky breaths, rubbing his face. “I think so, yeah. Okay. Now where was I?”

“Steve, c’mon. Just say whatever it is. This is me you’re talking to. I’ve known you since we were five. Out with it already.” I pleaded, toying with his shirt as he stopped pacing in favor of standing in front of me, staring down. Hungrily. His pupils were shot, almost blacking out the brown of his eyes. I gulped as I stared right back up at him, wondering if he was going to come out with whatever this was, my breath catching in my throat when his hips brushed right against my lower body and instead of moving away a little, Steve proceeded to step even closer, my back pressing right against the cold exterior of his car, the handle digging into my lower back just a little.

“Nancy was right.” Steve’s voice came out quietly, almost awestruck. I fidgeted slightly, my gaze dropping to the heels I was wearing briefly. He wasn’t having it, he reached out, fingers lightly gripping my chin as his face moved closer to mine all over again. “You’re the one I actually love. And I had no idea until Nancy, she…” he was talking faster now, almost as if he were afraid of what my reaction might be.

When what he was saying really hit me, I melted into him, going just a little clingy. “Yeah.. the last time we kind of argued… she threw that up at me too. Something about both of us being almost comically oblivious about things.” I agreed, the words coming quick, almost tumbling out one right on top of the other. I was a little shaky and I couldn’t tell if it was the alcohol or the way it felt pressing against him or the overwhelming realization we’d both just had.

When he rubbed against me lightly just to try and get even closer, I let out a ragged breath and looked up at him.

“Steve?” I asked quietly.

“Yeah, princess?” Steve muttered, his gaze fixing on my lips as his tongue slowly crawled along the outline of his mouth. His fingertips were digging into my hips now and I gasped when I felt him strained against dark jeans. It was distracting enough I couldn’t think straight.

“I wanna get out of here.” I barely managed to breathlessly respond.

“Me too.” his mouth brushed against the corner of mine lazily and his hands crept down my sides, squeezing when they stopped at my hips. I raised a leg, letting it settle on his hip and his hand left my hip to wander down and squeeze my thigh as he did it again, clumsily rocking himself right against me, drawing a whimper out of me.

“Where do you want to go?” Steve asked as he tilted my chin, guiding my gaze back up to him. “I just want to be alone with you…” he mumbled against my forehead, making me shiver at the way it felt when his lips brushed my skin. “Just wanna talk. Make up for lost time.” his words had me smiling a little, biting my lip and nodding in agreement. I did too. We had so much to talk about and straighten out. And I wanted cuddles. I wouldn’t mind many more kisses like the one we shared inside the party, either.

Among other things.

“Well, anywhere we go, I’m going to be sneaking back in.” I gave a soft giggle as I met his gaze and watched the smile grow.

“You went all bad girl on me, Charlie.”

“I most certainly did not. I’m protesting my curfew.”

“My house then? I mean, if you want to go. We’d actually be able to be alone. Not like here, with all these fucking people.”  Steve chuckled as he gave a half annoyed gesture back towards Billy’s crowded house. I blushed and looked up at him, nodding in agreement.

“Let’s just go.” I answered, letting him help me into the passenger seat of his car then gripping hold of his shirt and pulling him down into me, crashing my lips against his yet again. My mouth strayed, gingerly grazing against the side of his neck and he gave a quiet groan, his fingers digging into the back of my seat as he whined against my throat, “Charlotte, this isn’t getting us to my place.”

“I know but I couldn’t resist.” I answered, my eyes fluttering open and shut as I felt his teeth dig into my neck lightly. He smirked against my skin and finally pulled away, shutting the door to my side of the car in a hurry, then rushing around to the driver seat, getting in.

The drive to his house was quiet. The tension between us had shifted from awkward to heavy… filled with want. Things we hadn’t managed to say to each other just yet. Things we needed to say.

As we came to a stop beneath one of few redlights in town, his fingers skimmed my thighs, resting, squeezing a little as he looked over at me. I leaned in, my mouth crashing against his. His lips fell open and his tongue swept out, colliding with mine as his hand crept just a little higher and he breathed into the kiss, “This is okay, right?”

“Mhm.” I hummed against his mouth, squirming and rocking myself against the touch of his hand when it brushed against my velvet covered crotch. He growled quietly, his lips latching onto my bottom one, sucking until I could feel it aching and I was panting and begging, a squirmy whining mess in my seat.

“Want you so bad. So bad.” he muttered as he pulled away, staring at me with a lust filled gaze, letting out several drawn out and shaky breaths as if he were trying to calm himself down.

There was no calming me down at this point. I leaned across the console keeping us separate and gripped his jaw, pulling his mouth against mine. “You realize that to an extent, you’ve always had me, right?”

That smile, the bright goofy one, it crept to his mouth and he pulled back, just staring at me, our breathing all ragged and the windows of his car starting to fog up. He reached out and gripped my hips, guiding me over the console into his lap. His lips grazed my forehead and he mumbled softly against it, “You weren’t close enough.”

I looked up at him. “And now?”

“It’ll work until we finally manage to get inside.” Steve laughed softly, his hands at either side of my face, already leaning in for another kiss. I deepened it, my hand raising, my fingers catching in and tugging at thick hair. When he pouted against my mouth because I’d messed his hair up, I gave his top lip a playful nip and muttered with a quiet giggle, “You better get used to it.”

“You’re a lot bossier than I remember.” he mused, chuckling and adding as an afterthought, “ I kinda like it anyway.” about the way I just sort of carelessly played with his hair.

I rocked against his lap a little, getting bolder. Feeling the relief of everything being out in the open at last. His head fell back against the seat’s headrest and he groaned, bucking up into me from below, his hands skimming over my body, not staying in one place too long. His mouth breaking from mine to drag slowly down my throat and neck, briefly catching my earlobe. “We should really get inside.” he half groaned against the shell of my ear as his lips started to stray gently down the side of my neck all over again, latching on here and there, leaving marks behind.

I pulled back and rocked myself against him, giving a pout as I begged quietly, “Please?”

“Ya mean that’s a word you actually know, Charlotte?” Steve teased gently as he opened the door to the car and stepped out, stopping to adjust his grip on me. I wrapped my legs and arms around him and his mouth met mine all over again as he made his way up the walkway leading into his house. My back met the front door with a quiet smack and I climbed out of his arms, making him pout at me as my fingers toyed with the buttons on his black shirt, finally just pulling it open and sending a dusting of buttons plinking quietly against concrete. He chuckled quietly, watching a button settle and then his eyes were fixed firmly back on mine. And before I could even get a word out or take another breath, I was back in his arms and he was unlocking the door with as much haste as he could, his mouth latched onto mine as we stepped through the door and into the living room of his house.

His hand shot out, feeling the wall for the light switch without bothering to break the ongoing kiss. I could feel my lips swelling and the more I rubbed against him and whimpered, the more he growled quietly into my mouth. He finally found the light switch and my back met the couch. I reached up, trying to pull him down to my level and he chuckled when I pulled too hard and we wound up a tangle of limbs on the couch, faces bumping when we went back in for a kiss at the same time.

“Ouch. Your nose is pointy.” Steve laughed against my mouth.

“And? Yours is pointier, Steve.” I giggled. Our foreheads met and he bit his lip, staring down at me intently. A finger raising to catch gently in the necklace around my neck. The smile grew, softening as soon as he realized exactly what the necklace was.

It was a locket he’d gotten me when we were kids. Back before popularity and ‘eww, a girl can’t be your best friend. If she is, you must like her..” came into play. He got it for me on a birthday. I’d put a picture of my dad in one side and a picture of my grandparents in the other and the locket literally never left my neck, despite me keeping it hidden most of the time. It was the first truly nice thing anyone who wasn’t in my family had done and I guess after I put the pictures of people I loved the most inside, it made it easy for me to not take it off.

“You still have this?” his words came out in tender gasps against my mouth, then my throat. “I figured you probably put it away.” his hands were roaming back down my body all over again, squeezing my hips and making me rub against him. I drew a sharp gasp and bit my lip, staring up at him as I shook my head. My fingers carded his scalp, tugging at his hair and he groaned, bucking against me a little, both of us stopping to catch our breath.

My hand lowered, toying with the waistband of his pants and he stared at me. Our eyes locked and I muttered quietly, “I don’t want to stop.” as I unbuttoned his pants and then unzipped them, fingers shaky as I tugged pants and underwear down at the same time. Steve kicked them off after kicking off his shoes and after letting his eyes roam over me slowly, licking his lips,he breathed out against my throat, “Me either.”  an arm going beneath me as he rocked against me more slowly, his fingers searching for the zip to the back of the bodysuit. When he finally found it, he gave a quiet and triumphant laugh, tugging at the zip eagerly as his mouth latched onto my throat and I sat up a little bit, leaning into him, wiggling out of the bodysuit as best as I could until he stopped me, shaking his head. “I’m supposed to do that, babe. Let me.”

He took his time, lowering the bodysuit until my breath was coming in short gasps and I was pleading for more, scooting closer to him, just trying to push for any more friction than I was currently getting. When he got the bodysuit down to my hips, I slipped off the couch, slowly wiggling the body suit down to my ankles, slowly kicking it free. I bent down, pulling off the impossibly high heels and Steve sat there, eyes glued to my body, biting his lip and bucking against air as he whistled quietly and rubbed his chin. My hands roamed down my body, fingertips lingering lazily in a pair of black panties but he was on his feet, moving towards me in a split second, his hand brushing mine out of the way. He started to step closer, making me step back until my knees brushed the back of the couch and then I found myself on my back again, Steve positioning himself between my legs, staring up at me with lust blown eyes as he worked the clasps free from the garters that held my stockings in place and connected them to my panties.

“What the hell were you thinkin, wearing this out tonight?” His eyes met mine as he asked the question, daring to lower his head and dance his lips against my upper thigh. It sent a shiver down my body and I whimpered as my head fell back.

“Honest answer?” I asked breathlessly.

“I’d prefer it, yeah.” Steve answered, waiting expectantly. He made it really clear that I was not getting out of giving an answer.

With a few shaky breaths and my eyes fluttering shut for a second as he placed more kitten licks against my skin, I finally managed to answer “I wanted to look hot. And rub your face in it.”

“Even though you came with Byers to pick up Nancy…” Steve stared down at me, smirking a little as things began to click into place a lot better. “Oh.. Oh… So all that sarcasm was what? An act?”

“Nancy’s my best friend. I couldn’t hurt her, okay? I thought she...I thought she loved you and you guys were happy or whatever… So yeah.” I answered honestly, catching his gaze. It was the truth, now that I was finally allowing myself to admit it. Sure, I’d been hurt by Steve back then, but then he and Nancy started dating and I just… couldn’t deal with it. So I blamed the pain. Just to keep myself from feeling things again.

A desperate attempt to keep him at arms length.

“And now?” Steve eyed me, waiting on an answer. Since we were getting it all out, I couldn’t hold back any longer. I took a deep breath and a few seconds and finally, I spoke up to answer. “Now things might be different… Better. At least I hope they can be?” I bit my lip and answered quietly, reaching up to pull his mouth down to mine. Steve nipped at my lips until I could feel them swell on impact.

“Much better. I promise, babe.” Steve reassured me as he rose up again, working the fishnets down my legs. I wiggled them off my feet and they settled on the living room floor. Then he was back at it, intently focused on just how slowly he could peel down my panties. Just how much he could make me whimper and beg for him to hurry while locking eyes with me, a teasing gleam in his eyes.

I dragged my fingers through his hair as he lowered his head, his lips lazily settling on my lower abdomen stopping mid lick  just as he got my panties down my thigh to gaze back up at me and lick his lips.

“Steve, c’mon… Please?” I begged.

He took a deep breath, lowering himself even more, arms hooking beneath my legs, spreading me open wider. My legs settled over each of his shoulders and I shivered and giggled softly as I felt his mouth roaming up my calves. By the time he reached the sides of my knees, I was biting my lip and trying to squirm beneath him and I could feel myself getting wetter with each little kitten lick and gentle nip against the surface of my skin. I could hear his breath catch in his throat and he glanced up at me, licking his lips before lowering his mouth again, the soft groan shattering the air as his tongue rolled right up my center in one broad stripe. My fingers curled in the leather couch, desperately trying to find anything to clutch hold of as his lips locked over my clit and I felt him starting to suck and lick. My toes curling as my hips arched upward under his muttered command and my head fell back even further, despite my best efforts to stay at least partially upright to watch him.

“So sweet.” he muttered against my dripping and aching core, his tongue circling my clit one last time before slowly moving downward, two fingers slipping into me deep, working me open and scissoring gently, massaging. His tongue plunged deep inside and my whimpers and moans came almost breathless as I felt my insides tensing, the ache that had settled in a while ago only building further. I rocked my hips against his mouth and fingers and he growled against my core, teeth grazing against, the sucking and wet sounds of his mouth competing with my quiet whimpers, moans and gasps. The harder I tried to curl my toes or grip the couch, the more futile it proved to actually be. I was finally resorting to resting my hand on the top of his head, fingers tugging at his hair. I tensed a little more and he stopped to lock eyes with me, his lips and chin glistening with my juices, licking his lips slowly. “Let go, babe.”

I didn’t need any further urging. The orgasm ripped through me, leaving me shaky and moaning his name over and over as I raised a hand and dragged it through my hair. My mouth fell open and I had a hard time catching my breath for a solid few seconds. Steve was pulling himself up my body and leaning in for a kiss. I wrapped my legs around his hips, pulling him down closer to me, my mouth meeting his hungrily, a quiet moan at the taste of myself on his lips. Then as the kiss broke, I pulled back, nodding to the way his cock stood at attention. I licked my lips slowly and reached out, pushing him back, lightly straddling him. His hands caught on my body, digging and scraping and when my mouth left his to work down the front of his throat slowly, he arched against me, making me hiss as his cock grazed right between my folds gently. “Babe?”

“My turn now, Steve.” I drawled quietly as my tongue danced over his chest, then in a line down his abdomen. His fingers caught in my hair and when my lips caught on the tip of his cock, tongue rolling across slowly, savoring the taste of him as it filled my mouth, he whimpered. I glanced up at him, biting my lip and making my way back up to lean down and press my mouth against his, pulling us deep into another kiss that didn’t end until neither of us could breathe properly. The entire time, I could feel his cock nudging against my throbbing cunt and I whined against his lips “Steve, it’s my turn.”

“I’m not stopping you.” he teased, that lazy grin coming with ease as we locked eyes. I poked out my tongue at him and he raised a hand, catching hold of my jaw, guiding my mouth back to his as he muttered quietly, “Kissing you is probably going to be an addiction.”

“I’m not complaining.” I mused breathlessly as I started to crawl back down him again, settling between his legs, lowering my head. When I took his length deep in my mouth, my tongue rolling slowly over the entire length, he gripped my hair tighter, bucking his hips against my mouth gently. “Fuck.” he groaned, a warning tone to his voice as he reached down, tilting my head to make me stop. “Easy, princess.” he groaned out shakily. I bit my lip and nodded before locking my lips around his length again, the suction causing a quiet pop as I worked my mouth over every single inch. Steve was really starting to squirm and finally, I felt him tugging at my hair as he cleared his throat. When I looked up, catching my breath, he gripped my jaw again, guiding my mouth to his.

“C’mon up here, princess.” Steve reached down to the spot his pants landed at on the living room floor and after blindly digging in a pocket while not breaking the kiss, he held up a foil covered square, ripping at the corner with his teeth and spitting the torn edge out. I reached out, my hand circling his, guiding the condom into my own hand and I pulled it out of it’s packaging, giving a soft giggle. Steve bit his lip and leaned up and in slightly, muttering a soft, “What am I gonna do with you, hm?” as he gave me a gentle and loving kiss that deepened to a point where neither of us were breathing on their own anymore as it began to break. I worked the condom down over his length, giving a gentle pump or two after I finished, making him buck against my hand and start to whine as he pulled me back up his body, into his lap.

I sank down on his cock, a quiet whimper leaving my lips as I felt myself being stretched out and split in two. My hands raised, one going to the hair at the nape of his neck and the other to his shoulders, my fingertips digging in lightly as I stayed still and let myself get used to the way he felt inside me.

His hands gripped my hips and his mouth crashed against mine, his teeth tugging at my lower lip in the heat of a messy kiss. He started to pump me up and down, bucking into me from below and I moaned loud enough that it echoed in the nearly silent house.

“Ah, fuck.. Steve. Faster.” I begged breathlessly, but my begging seemed to fall on deaf ears as Steve seemed to be determined on fucking into me long, slow and deep drives. His mouth strayed from mine, little kitten licks and nips against my skin as his mouth marched down the front of my throat. His hands left my hips, moving up the curve of my body, stopping at the sides of my tits, squeezing them together as he dove his mouth down, letting it lazily latch onto my nipple and started to fuck into me from below just a little faster. I whimpered and rocked my hips back and forth, making him grip me even tighter, his movements growing a little jerky, a lot faster. “Charlotte, whoa.. Slower, baby. I’m gonna blow.” he warned, his voice a husky purr against my skin as he fixed pleading eyes on me.

But I couldn’t stop. Another orgasm was building with each deeper drive. I trie dto slow down, peppering his face and lips with little kisses and nipping at his neck, sucking to leave a mark or two behind. My head fell back as I continued to bounce up and down on his cock, getting faster and faster. By the time I really felt myself tensing up all over and the orgasm threatening to take over at any second, his hips stuttered and his cock bottomed out, striking against my spot a time or two that literally almost had me seeing stars. “Steve, p-please. Don’t you dare stop.”

“Oh, I’m not planning on it, princess. I kind of can’t.” Steve continued to plow into me from below, holding my hips hard enough to leave light bruising behind. His other hand wandered up, tangling in the back of my hair, giving a few gentle tugs that sent me whimpering and moaning as my orgasm shattered through at his quietly urging, “C’mon, princess.. Ride me. Get it all out. Wanna.. Wanna feel you, oh god.” and his lips really latched onto my neck, just below my earlobe. I felt my walls clench around his length, continued bouncing up and down on his cock, slowing down just a little as I clutched at his chest and dug my fingers into his shoulders and my head fell back. 

My orgasm shattered through me a second time and I moaned his name over and over. Steve chuckled and leaned up to mumble against my skin “Ready for me?” after a few minutes of letting me ride out the high of my orgasm and I nodded, going clingy and melting against him. He smoothed his hands over my hair and muttered quietly, “There you go, baby.. Just hold on to me.” as he directed my mouth towards his and swallowed up my moans and whimpers in a long and slow kiss as he started to really fuck into me from below, striking right against my spot a time or two, making me really moan as I held on. The kiss broke just as I could feel him throbbing, filling the condom and making me wet all over again.

His forehead pressed against mine as we both clung to each other, trying to catch our breath. He muttered softly against my mouth, “I heard your stomach growl… Want anything?”

“Just to stay like this a little longer.” I yawned lazily, leaning against him, practically molded to his body.

[trensu]

Episode 12: The One where Everyone Goes to Evil Summer School and Has a Bad Time

And we’re off to a bad start bc we’re at Evil Summer School and WC is monologuing like the world’s shittiest villain

His flunkies take everyone’s swords and wwx whispers “lan zhan” after watching lwj hand over his sword (LIKE, THE ONE THING HE HAS LEFT OF HIS HOME *SOBS*)

Lwj ignores him tho

And then keeps ignoring him

Be easy on him, folks, he’s overcoming some trauma

We get more useless wc monologuing

But we’ll ignore him and focus instead on how wwx keeps throwing worried little glances at lwj

(hey remember how last episode i told you all about lwj’s capture and subsequent injury even tho it wasn’t wangxian moment?? IT PAYS OFF IN THIS EPISODE WITH MULTIPLE WANGXIAN MOMENTS)

(also, just fyi at this point wwx still doesn’t know what all went down at the cloud recesses or that lwj is injured; i mean yeah, wc bragged to him about it but what, we’re gonna take him at his word? Heck no)

Wc assigns the class homework - Memorizing Wen Clan Rules

So we see wwx being all studious

He and jc are dragging the wen clan for their hypocrisy and then wwx has an Epiphany

Wwx: hey, the Wen clan is so petty, they wouldn’t have just settled for LWJ attending Evil Summer School; they would’ve taken way more hostages I mean disciples!! SOMETHING BAD MUST’VE HAPPENED

And he leaps up with every intention of tracking down LWJ but some wen flunkies are guarding the door so that ends up being a no-go

But wwx is not deterred! No sir, he is coming up with a plan to finally get LWJ’s attention 

We’re back in class at Evil Summer School and wc is all i’m gonna pick ppl to recite the rules bc i’m a douchebag

And ofc he picks lwj, wwx, and jzx

Lwj: Can’t do it. Not today.

Jzx: Yeah, no, that’s Beneath me

Wwx: oh oh pick me!! I can do it!! *raises hand excitedly*

Omg wwx he already picked you, you don’t have to do that

Wc: okay, but if you get it wrong I will Punish you bc i’m an asshole that way

Cue wwx’s Classic Look of Disgust (guys, guys, i just love this expression on his face SO MUCH, i couldn’t even tell you why)

But that look quickly morphs into his Signature Mischievous Grin 

Which he aims at lwj, so ofc it looks SUPER FLIRTY ahhhhh

Lwj continues to ignore him

AGAIN I ASK, how the HELL does he keep doing that??! If i had wwx smile like that at me, he’d have my FULL UNDIVIDED ATTENTION FOREVER

Okay, here’s where a good moment becomes a GREAT moment

Wwx goes up all cocky and starts THEATRICALLY doing STRETCHES even tho all he’s doing is RECITING LINES, OMG, WWX

Wc: GET ON WITH IT

Wwx: right, right, i got this. Okay, listen carefully~!

Wwx: *STARTS RECITING LAN CLAN RULES*

THAT’S MY BOY!!! LOOK AT MY BOY GO! HOLY SHIT, THE AUDACITY. WHAT A BI-CON, I LOVE IT!!

Now lwj FINALLY looks at him!!

And it only took 14min and wwx reciting his clan’s rules to FINALLY GET A REACTION

Wc: HOW DARE YOU RECITE LAN CLAN RULES IN QISHAN

Wwx: oh dear, oh gosh, how foolish of me! I am SO sorry i got them all mixed up!!

And then he literally pats himself on the back with a pleased little smirk

And that’s how jzx, lwj, and wwx end up in Evil Detention carrying manure to the vegetable fields

Lwj is just pouring the manure out of the buckets

Wwx: lan zhan, you want me to find you a scooper?

Lwj: *ignores him*

Jzx: *unwillingly bears witness to this and rolls his eyes*

(don’t even, jzx, you het disaster)

Wwx: hey lan zhan, how come your clan has a silencing spell but not a spell that blocks out gross smells?

Lwj: *picks up empty buckets and leaves, CONTINUING TO IGNORE WWX FOR SOME INEXPLICABLE REASON*

Here wwx just sloppily dumps out his buckets and chases after him

As they walk over to wherever they need to go to refill their buckets, wwx starts asking lwj Plot Questions and generally worrying about him

Which could’ve become a sweet moment

Except that wc shows up to ruin the moment with his, you know, general existence

So obviously wwx has to go and insult wc to his face, right? HE WAS TRYING TO HAVE QUALITY TIME WITH HIS SOULMATE, GODDAMNIT

Wc tries to whip wwx but wwx catches it like a BADASS and is all “don’t try me”

But then wc gets his flunkies to tie up wwx!! (i’m telling you guys, this clan really seems to have a thing for tying/chaining people up)

Lwj sees that his soulmate is defenseless and is like, can’t have that happening and goes to defend him!!

Ugghhh but that ASSHOLE WEN CHAO GOES AND HITS LWJ ON HIS INJURED LEG WHICH SENDS LWJ TUMBLING INTO THE GROUND

Wwx: HEY, leave him alone! I was the one insulting you!!

DO YOU SEE THAT GUYS?? THEY ALWAYS DEFEND EACH OTHER!!

And actually this starts up a general pattern for them: lwj always defends wwx physically and wwx always defends lwj verbally

IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL. THEY COVER EACH OTHER’S WEAK SPOTS WITHOUT EVEN REALIZING IT!! 

(lwj isn’t all that good with words as you know, and wwx has this talent of making everyone around him want to punch him in the face, his beautiful beautiful face)

Wc goes to whip wwx again, but LWJ gets up on his feet in an instant (even with the leg wound!!) and catches the whip ONE-HANDED AND YANKS IT OUT OF WC’S GRASP

LIKE, DON’T FUCKING TOUCH MY SOULMATE YOU SLIMY BASTARD

Obvs he didn’t say that, but you can see it in his eyes that that’s exactly what he was thinking, word-for-word. Trust me on this.

The wen flunkies release wwx who drops to the ground and lwj immediately grabs him by the arm

He doesn’t try to lift him up and he’s not actually holding him up

So why the arm-grabbing?

I’LL TELL YOU WHY

BC HE WANTS TO BE NEAR WWX, THAT’S WHY

And let me remind you that this is the same lwj who’s all “i don’t touch people” back in episode 5: the One with Angry bb!LWJ

Yeah, that rule doesn’t apply to wwx anymore BC SOULMATES

Although in all fairness, who wouldn’t grab onto wwx given half a chance?

Okay now wc monologues some more 

Wwx: wc, stop babbling 

(omg wwx, stop baiting him)

Wc: TAKE HIM TO THE DUNGEON

Lwj: *BOLTS UPRIGHT ON HIS INJURED LEG AND BLOCKS THEIR WAY*

Srsly, injured leg!! And it doesn’t even slow him down when it comes to protecting wwx!! And he stretches out his arm so his pretty white sleeves mostly cover wwx from view

Wc: don’t worry, the dungeon’s big enough for two (wc you slimy bastard, you’re ruining everyone’s sex dungeon fantasies)

Wwx: *pushes away lwj’s arm* nah, just take me. The dungeon’s bound to be cooler than being out on these sunny fields anyway lol

And now we have this terrible moment where we see wwx be well and truly terrified for the first time in the show

He’s thrown into the dungeon WHILE CHAINED UP and there’s this HUGE MUTANT DOG MONSTER

Poor wwx visibly pales and breaks out into a cold sweat while wen chao mocks him (I HATE HIM SO MUCH)

Okay, i’d like to take a moment here to fully acknowledge that this dog monster thing is, like, really horrible effects-wise. We all know this. But we’re gonna pretend for sake of the Emotional Trauma it causes our darling wwx that it’s actually a big scary thing, okay?

Anyway

WEN NING TO THE RESCUE - knocks out the dog with strategically placed needles and provides wwx Medicine Pouch and Medicine Bottle 

he’s like, i stole medicine for you bc we’re bffs and i’d die for you (which he does eventually lololol I’M SORRY THAT WAS AWFUL)

I’m sure you’re all hey trensu, this isn’t a wangxian moment you said this was a wangxian guide, what the heck

BUT IT IS A WANGXIAN MOMENT and also it sets us up for ANOTHER wangxian moment later on in the show!

It’s a wangxian moment now bc wen ning provides the info wwx has been trying to get this whole time, aka what the heck is up with lwj and the cloud recesses?

Wwx looks utterly DEVASTATED when wn tells him lwj’s home was burned

And when he tells wwx about the wens breaking lwj’s leg?

FUCKING FURIOUS

HE’S SO ANGRY THAT THEY HURT HIS LAN ZHAN

HE PUNCHES THE STONE FLOOR OF HIS CELL WITH AN ALREADY BLOODIED UP HAND

THAT’S HOW ANGRY HE IS

See? Totally a wangxian moment

Oh, and then we see him take like, only one (1) medicine piece from Medicine Bottle and then slips the it and the Medicine Pouch into his robes

Wwx: i’ll save this for lan zhan

I’LL SAVE THIS FOR LAN ZHAN, HE SAYS

HE’S INJURED AND CHAINED UP AND HE’S SAVING THE MAJORITY OF THE MEDICINE FOR LAN ZHAN

BC HE LOVES HIM

AHHHHHH

Okay now we’re back in class (and wtf, wwx has to attend class even after all that??)

Wwx is still looking all wrung-out and bloodied

We see lwj look at wwx all concerned!

Plot stuff happens

More plot stuff

Now we get set up for our last wangxian moment of the episode!!

Wen Flunkie: hey boss, there’s this monster in this mountain that probably someone should get rid off

Wc: oh cool, good thing i’ve got all these hostages i mean cannon fodder I MEAN visiting disciples with me. Let’s do it!

TIME FOR A FIELD TRIP (OF EVIL)!!!

Wen chao is on a horse with his girlfriend while everyone else is walking bc wc is the WORST PERSON

Then oh no, lwj is visibly limping as they go on!!

And wwx looks over and sees lwj limping

~THEIR SONG~ STARTS GENTLY PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND AHH AHHHHH

IDK IF YOU GUYS NOTICED YET BUT THAT’S OUR CUE THAT SOME GOOD WANGXIANTICS IS COMING UP

Wwx does not hesitate even a minute to go help him!! BC THAT’S WHAT SOULMATES DO

But JC ofc holds him back (what the heck jc), and he’s all leave him alone, you’ve helped him enough already

And wwx is like, HE JUST LOST HIS HOME, JC!! AND HIS LEG IS BROKEN. WHAT IF HE LOSES HIS LEG??

JC: it’s not like he’ll let you close enough to carry him anyway!!

Wwx: well that’s his choice BUT I STILL GOTTA OFFER BC I LOVE HIM, HE NEEDS TO KNOW IT’S AN OPTION!!

JC: we can’t stick our noses in his business!

Wwx: well SOMEBODY has to help him!!

And he flounces off to go to lwj

Wwx: lan zhan, how’s your leg?

Lwj: it’s fine

He says, y’know, like a liar.

Wwx: hey, we’re friends, you can be honest with me!! Are you sure your leg is okay??

Lwj: it’s fine

GOD DAMN IT LWJ, HE’S TRYING TO HELP YOU

Wwx: don’t pretend it’s fine all the time!! I can carry you~! 

OMG HE SAYS THIS WITH THE SWEETEST, MOST SINCERE SMILE, GUYS

HE WANTS TO HELP LWJ SO BAD

HE WANTS LWJ TO LET HIM CLOSE!! 

BECAUSE HE LOVES HIM, AHHHHH

And with that sweet, sincere smile, the episode ends

On a high note!!

Lovely, lovely, it was lovely, i want to stare at that smile forever

Return to Masterpost

[scoopsgf]

oh which hp fic if you’re comfortable with sharing???

ofc!!! it’s called harry potter and the prince of slytherin! I’ve been reading it since I was around 14 years old and it’s still updating to this day and it’s fantastic. I really can’t say enough good things about this fic, like, imo it’s better than canon. it starts off a little rough because TSM hadn’t really found his voice yet (which he admits, but honestly I really don’t mind the first few chapters); the story really starts getting mind-blowingly awesome around halloween of year one when The Gang begins to form. anyway, a bit of general info (but don’t let any of it throw you off, this story is all about subverting tropes and making overdone stuff interesting and exciting, like oh my shit the amount of times this story has knocked me onto my ass in pure shock WOW!): it’s an AU in which the potters lived and had twin boys (yeah, I know, I know, stay with me here), but harry was still sent to live with the Dursley’s for many, many reasons—not all of which were justified, and harry recovering from this and being rightfully hurt about it is a huge theme esp for the first few books—did I mention that it’s over a million words long and has 136 chapters because if I didn’t, I’m sorry, but holy fuck the way that ive re-read every single one of those words multiple times??? like??? it’s SO GOOD??—anyway, all of this culminates into the result of Harry being sorted into Slytherin (shut up, I know, but LISTEN) and it’s just? such a hot take? it’s so fucking GOOD and listen the character development— i??? like harry (currently, where I am at the end of year three) is absolutely NOTHING like Harry of year one but the way he got from point A to point B is done in such a realistic way at such a reasonable pace. this story really is it’s own universe and the characters are so well rounded. It dives more into the wizarding world and explores wizarding lore in a way that should make canon piss itself with embarrassment. there’s some mild but justified bashing of certain characters in the beginning, but that doesn’t last long; instead these characters actually own up to their mistakes and like, change. as a writer I’m in absolute awe of the way they’ve been shaped and developed into who they are now. Hermione in this fic? oh my god. she’s an absolute treasure. Blaise? my witty sarcastic asshole son. theo? pure cinnamon roll baby boy. protect him!! and Harry himself oh my GOD listen if you need any motivation to read this fic just know that I took so much inspiration for BFS!Peter from TPOS!Harry. what a guy!! holy SHIT I love him!! key moments include him rambling on how to make beef Wellington, waking up at the ass crack of dawn to cook Mrs. Weasley breakfast after everything she’s done for him, being so genuinely good and pure hearted after all the shit he went through, being observant as all fuck and blowing my goddamn MIND all the time hhh holy shit!! this story is so good I have so much love in my heart for it!!! it literally PAINS me that some people haven’t read it or don’t know that it exists because I genuinely just live my life from one TPOS update to the next. holy shit I haven’t even started talking about Neville yet. what the fuck. he’s literally so good and he’s SO much more than canon Neville like?? he has such a strong moral compass in this fic—in fact it’s so strong that Harry, who is incredibly self-aware actually asks Neville to be his moral compass. It’s one of those moments that makes me cry because like, a lot of this fic is world-building and dry, sarcastic humor and moments that aren’t flat, per se, but don’t teter in the direction of either a) extreme angst or b) extreme fluff. a lot of scenes fall into a nice realistic middle that i constantly strive to achieve myself. but anyway, sometimes there are scenes that just jump out at you because they’re so touching and heartwarming and snjdkejdd I literally cannot shut up I’m not GONNA shut up I’m not DONE. will rb with more info

[stilydinski]

Anime Pretty Boys™️: A List

So basically no one asked but all of a sudden I felt the need to make a top 10 ranking list of some Pretty Boys in animes I could think of so why not share with the weebs.

To clarify: When I say Pretty Boys I mean pretty and not hot in general ! There are so so many more attractive characters out there but this is a list of guys that just look so incredibly beautiful it makes me want to bawl my eyes out. While I ofc would sell my organs for tons of anime boys, these are just the ones that make me go "mmhhhmm pretti" before thinking they're hot or whatever. I hope this makes sense aha ha.

10. Chisaki (My Hero Academia)

Those of you who haven’t seen the show might be asking yourselves what’s up with that mask but let’s just ignore it (masks are a thing everywhere now anyways right? man’s just staying safe ssjsj). Basically when I first saw this man I was speechless because wow his face is so ?? intense and pretty at the same time. The hair is casually messy, the eyes boring into your soul and the ear piercings are just hot. Also his style??? hot damn?? i mean the jacket he always wears looks so mf expensive and the suits like Yes Sir fuck me UP but at the same time he is so intimidatingly pretty that I wouldn’t mind joining the bad guys here. However because of the high hotness factor he’s lower in the list might be the dangerous aura who knows

9. Sesshomaru (Inuyasha)

Basically this man has more elegance than anyone could ever obtain. The way he always wears this fur thing on his shoulders just as a statement and never gets it dirty or loses it? an icon. Everything from the hair to let’s call it the “make up” to the outfit is just on point and you won’t ever catch the man slipping. This is the only character ever that could make me disregard the fact that he’s technically a dog demon and over 500 years old and just let him step on me.

8. Daisuke (Fugou Keiji: Balance:UNLIMITED)

I don’t think I need to say much here. First time I saw this man I was legit already on my knees without knowing a single thing about him. Some of you might say he’s more hot than straight up pretty but I beg to disagree because he is genuinely one of the most beautiful men I have ever seen. Now I do agree that in comparison he certainly can be considered more hot which is why he’s a little lower on the list however you can’t tell me that his face wasn’t shaped by God personally.

7. Usui (Kaichou wa Maid-sama!)

ON GOD if this man asked me to marry him I would not hesitate for a single second. Effortlessly pretty, the flavor is immaculate, never tasted anything like this before. Not only is he the perfect man but his face is so insanely pretty. Now Usui’s more of a casual beautiful because his face doesn’t necessarily have something outstandingly special but as a whole there is just not a single flaw.

6. Victor (Yuri!!! On Ice)

Now, you can’t tell me the hair doesn’t hit different. The man literally looks like a Greek God like that’s just a FACT we all know that, he knows that, Yuri knows that, the other Yuri knows that. Man's literally chosen to do the most elegant sport looking LIKE THAT as if he wouldn’t completely change figure skating forever. His face is so pleasing to look at because he just has this angelic aura around him that makes you think he came down from heaven personally to raise the bar for us all.

5. Yato (Noragami)

Let me just say what we are all thinking: EYES. I can’t think of anyone with prettier eyes and that’s for a good reason. Yato’s not a God for nothing, the godly looks are very evident even if he’s a little bruised up in the gif. His face is perfect, the hair looks elegant and yeah the eyes are just mesmerizing. Homeboy might be spotting a track suit at all times but damn he can wear it while living his Immortal Pretty Boy Life.

4. Guren (Owari no Seraph)

This one’s a funny one because let me tell you I know absolutely nothing about this man. I have not seen the anime and I barely know his name but I saw this man a few weeks ago and when I tell you I almost started crying I mean it. It’s hilarious how this man could be the biggest asshole who murdered my family and I’d still think he’s insanely beautiful. Now I sadly can’t get into this as deep as with this others because I have zero knowledge about him but the fact that he was the third person I thought of when making this list even if I don’t know him should say enough for now. Face is 10/10, he’s living that pretty boy lifestyle doing whatever it is that he does but god does he look graceful while doing it.

3. Shoto (My Hero Academia)

Now THIS. This is interesting because can you BELIEVE that this incredibly handsome boy does not even KNOW how pretty he is? Looking like that he would be allowed to have such a huge ego but he isn’t aware of the facts??? The two colored hair and eyes are both iconic and groundbreaking. His face just screams pretty boy in every possible way and on god i would do anything for him to realize that. Everyone in Class 1A knows how beautiful he is except him?? I could write you a three pages essay on how beautiful he is and that would just be the outer appearance without getting into his great personality. I would be ready to declare my love for him on 10 pages in four different languages but let’s not get into that now.

2. Akaashi (Haikyuu)

I honestly don’t even know how to start this. Akaashi is one of a kind. I lie awake at night thinking about the fact that he is so insanely beautiful and I wonder what the creators were thinking. Imagine you wanna create a volleyball anime and while drawing someone who is not even on the main team you come up with this? What kind of process goes through your head?? How could you publish a character like this knowing no other character you ever draw will ever live up to his pretty face? I wouldn’t know how to act. Looking at Akaashi is the most pleasing thing and the fact that he is not only crazy pretty but also has the best personality just sends me over the edge. No one’s doing it like him. This man can have my credit card, my house, my family and my liver, he can take it all and I would still worship him like the God he is, thank you.

1. Howl (Howl’s Moving Castle)

Ladies and gentlemen, may I announce the prettiest Pretty Boy of all time. This wouldn’t be a list of Pretty Boys without Howl. The man literally invented being pretty and god is he dramatic about it. Most of us probably count him to our childhood crushes. Remember when he said “I don’t see a point in living if I’m not beautiful” because he accidently dyed his hair black? I have never seen anyone this dramatic but of course his ego is big with a face like that I mean if I looked like THAT I would act up too. I would drop everything for this man and that’s on Sophie leaving behind her life to live in his castle yeah i know she didn’t do it for him back then but lbr i would. Anyways Howl literally said I support the ugly community but it ain’t me and it’s true, if you look up Pretty in a dictionary his picture will show up. I honestly don’t know what else to tell you because Howl leaves me speechless on a regular but that’s fine.

This marks the end of my list, please let me know if I forgot someone. If you made it this far with reading this mess thank you for keeping up with my amazed ass, i’ll go cry over how beautiful everyone on this list is now. I will probably regret the rankings in a week from now so don't mind them too much