i'm also looking for a job right now (one of those studying a degree needing a graduate degree to work, fml) and the job market is so fucked right now. i hope you do find one soon.
thank you for your kind thoughts. i think at this point, barring any potential one-off gigs i might get asked to play, it's really unlikely i'll get a job this summer. on the bright side i DO have a job lined up for the fall -- i'm working a fellowship at my university while i'm in grad school. it doesn't pay very much, but it funds the degree which is as good as deal as i could hope for (esp cause my program will probably take up to three years). i just really really wish i had something to do in the meantime over the summer; i hate sitting around without something to Do, and i'm bad at motivating myself to do stuff, and i hate the fact that i'm not able to contribute significantly to my own expenses yet. (of course i've extremely grateful to have a support system willing to help me while i'm at this point in my life, but i do WANT to be able to support myself at least in part by now.) but considering the fact that it's already mid june (and i'm out of the country for a week pretty soon), even if there were seasonal positions still available around me no one is realistically gonna hire me for only two months of work. i think i'm pretty much fucked on that account and i just have to get over it at this point. still, it would be nice if even a fraction of the jobs i've applied to so far would even message me back...but almost none of them have. sigh!
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Content warning (light) : Experiments / Abuse / Body and eye horror tw(?)
The album cover is sick as hell, I initially thought it was skeletal parts, but it looks the most like an MRI scan showing a brain with a lot of abnormalities, including signs of head trauma.
The most profound detail I found in the "brain" is the dark spots.
Dark spots in the brain are usually the result of a brain lesion, a permanently damaged area of the brain usually caused by injury, infections, exposure to certain chemicals, etc. General trauma.
If it's someone's brain, I suspect it's Till's brain. aside from Luka, he has been through the worst of the Alien's mistreatment since he was a child, under Urak's (the bastard's) care he had been exposed to much abuse. The sheer harshness and hostility of Urak's "training" make it obvious why he was probably one of the only pets to withstand it all.
Life-long injury in some form is surely a given to me. Seeing as it's already been mentioned that because of Urak's abuse, his pets rarely make it to the end because of the mental issues they had developed, and experiments can kill them before they even make it to the stage.
Back to the brain, it has a lot of abnormalities (especially in its appearance). I can't explain much, I'm not a neurologist. But based on the research I did the the most damage seems to be near the Frontal lobe and the Precentral gyrus.
source source source
This could explain Till's already implied mental problems, one of them (In my opinion) being some form of dissociation, round 6 was the most telling as his behavior was out of sorts having been broken down he changed drastically, throughout the whole round he was emotionally distant, i'd probably describe it as him being in a daze.
And his hallucination of Mizi during the karaoke scene could be a symptom of that to ease out of the moment.
(I also see that as more of a coping mechanism for Till, but I'm taking it into account for this since it's likely.)
Experiments always looked intense, I wonder just what chemicals and substances he was exposed to, in one of the opening scenes of CURE we're shown what looks to be DNA splitting, or duplicating? there could be a multitude of reasons for that. But it makes me curious just how deep this goes, and how much it affected Till. There is a lot of things about him that could be explained with Urak's presence in his life.
Having his brain tampered with to such a degree, I think we'll start to see the horrific effects come to light here soon.
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hi, hope you've been doing okay.
i'm almost done with renovations, but this being said, while i'll probably be coming back in the next week or so, i just want to let you know that moving forward, activity will be perpetually slow, if not sporadic. i'm also going to just focus on the threads and dynamics that feel the most nourishing to me. hope you can understand.
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Hey, just saw your last post; sorry things have been rough. You are appreciated and found special and you're treasured by me and I'm sure lots of people. Hope you feel better or and things get better for you. It made glade to see a post from you, but no worries if you need to take time away either. Sending love and peace and health your way.
THANK YOU, YOU SWEET BEAN!!! 🧡🧡🧡
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