#and i understood when this arc started that it would get pretty dark

[antianakin]

@auditect

You seem like you're being genuine about this and asking this in good faith, so I'm going to say this as respectfully as I possibly can: no, she's not.

When thinking about what's canon and what's not, there are 2 things to consider. One is, was it explicitly said or shown in the canon material (in this case, Rebels)? For example, did you hear anyone CALL Ahsoka a Gray Jedi, or discuss Gray Jedi and then have Ahsoka pretty clearly get associated with said concept? Two is, have you ever heard the main creator of a canon material explicitly state somewhere that Ahsoka is intended to be understood as a Gray Jedi by the audience? In this case that would probably be Filoni, but you can probably count the other writers and even Lucas in this category.

The answer to all of those questions is no. At no point has the concept of Gray Jedi ever been brought up in a high canon piece of media in Star Wars (in case high canon is a new term for you, this includes all of the movies, TCW, Rebels, and the Disney+ shows like The Mandalorian, TBOBF, TBB, etc.). Gray Jedi are FANON because they only exist in a piece of extended universe Star Wars media which, in many ways, works as basically official fanfiction. Nobody working on the more "high media" stuff is ever obligated to keep extended universe stories in mind and adhere to their continuity, but the people working on extended universe stories have to adhere to high canon continuity as best they can.

Obviously there are things that have been brought from extended universe into high canon, but Gray Jedi simply aren't one of them. And, in my own opinion, this is because the entire concept makes no sense with the actual worldbuilding of high canon Star Wars. As much as Filoni shits on the Jedi, he does generally seem to understand Lucas's worldbuilding which makes the fanon concept of Gray Jedi literally impossible. Using a little dark side without it having an impact on you isn't possible. That's not how the Force works, as the saying goes.

So no, Ahsoka's not a gray Jedi in Rebels. She's a former Jedi who happens to keep using her training and her lightsabers to help people in the Rebellion. Even in the trailers for the new Ahsoka show, the tagline says "rebel, outcast, JEDI." There's nothing in there about being gray, there's no acknowledgment of Gray Jedi as a thing. Ahsoka is someone who was once a Jedi and will likely end up a Jedi again by the end of her show because that's the journey we've sort-of seen her going on throughout the different things she's been in.

In Rebels, we see Ahsoka actively working with other Jedi (Kanan and Ezra) to continue work that the Jedi Order had started, we see Ahsoka specifically come along on missions that are Jedi specific problems. She says she's not a Jedi, yes, but in her time, being a Jedi meant something very specific, you couldn't just identify as a Jedi if you weren't someone who was adopted into the Order officially. Ahsoka was expelled and then refused to come back, so she's no longer an official member of the Jedi Order and can no longer take on the title of Jedi. And then the Order is destroyed, so all roads for officially rejoining the Order are now closed to her effectively forever. And this leaves her with trying to figure out what being a Jedi means to her in the wake of that destruction, how can she re-identify as a Jedi without an Order to be a part of, does she even have the right to do so when she hadn't been a Jedi when the Order was destroyed? We've seen characters like Kanan and Cal go through similar arcs and both of them became full Jedi by the end of them. There's no real reason Ahsoka won't do the same given that it's the most obvious place for her to go.

Now, none of that means that if you like the fanon concept of Gray Jedi that you can't just headcanon Ahsoka as a Gray Jedi after she leaves the Order. More power to you! But just because it's a headcanon you like doesn't make it canon. Until it's made explicit via dialogue or something similar in high canon, or at the very least said in an interview by one of the creators, it's NOT CANON.

[railingsofsorrow]

the prophecy + emily prentiss

The Prophecy

A/N: love to write about emily, thanks for this request. the prophecy plus emily is just *chef's kiss*  

summary: emily thinks about her life, her family, and what she had to do to survive and be where she is today. pairing: no pairing (platonic) w.c: 1.3K warnings/content: canon divergence for the sake of the plot; case-related violence; the doyle arc & lauren reynolds; this is mainly an inner monologue; fluff...

navi

masterpost

cm masterlist

[part of "the taylor swift anthology"] 

[requested]

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

❝ I got cursed like Eve got bitten. ❞ 

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

She walked into the bullpen with nothing but a wavering confidence and the heavy burden of her résumé on her hands.  

In the previous night, Emily gave herself a pep talk. She was lying in bed, hair splattered around in a dark halo on her pillow, comfortable but not quite. A few friends helped her settling in back to the city. They were also responsible for some alterations to her job positions on her résumé. You know, when everyone says they have to lie to get a job? Those little white-lies, they'll get you where you want and everyone will forget it later.  

In her case, she needed to become a whole other person.  

Actually... She had to learn how to get back to her old self. The girl before her undercover job. The woman on a desk job, before it all started.  

Emily felt the bitter taste of not being able to recognise herself in the mirror. She became what he wanted and transformed into what she hated. Ian Doyle was the first case she had to go undercover and it seemed tricky at first, Emily knew it wasn't going to be easy, but she didn't knew how profusely hard would be for her later on.  

When she entered the BAU, Emily was skeptical of pretty much everything and everyone. It was hard for her to trust, but she made it there. Her team reached her trust and she was able to let go of her walls little by little. But her secrets, those remained in a deep corner of her mind she did not wanted to access ever again.

And that happened. For a while.

Until it all caught up to her and Emily had to, once again, say goodbye to another life she had created.  

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

❝ I guess a lesser woman

would've lost hope. ❞ 

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Up to what point does one gets tired of being someone else? 

Emily asked that to herself when she was in Paris. She had been Emily Prentiss, Lauren Reynolds, then. . . Emily Prentiss again. But the Supervisory Special Agent Prentiss had to die so she could survive the clutches of Ian Doyle. She had to die so her found family could be spared of her own undoing.  

It was a means to an end, right? But was is worth it?  

Emily kept wondering that the whole time she was in France. Was it worth it was it worth it was it worth it— Was it? Was it worth it to leave her team, her friends, her job behind to run away from her problems? Because that's what she did. Emily ran away. Well, she had to survive somehow and if staying meant putting those she loved in danger, then she'd rather them mourn an empty casket. 

It was a cold night in the city of Paris when she had won an online Scrabble game with an online player called cheetobreath once again. She felt a little warmer inside. 

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

❝ a greater woman wouldn't beg, 

but I looked to the sky and said  

please 

I've been on my knees 

change the prophecy.❞ 

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Was there a prophecy enforced upon her from the moment she had been born? Well, if that was the case then she understood the misfortunes and shortcomings she had to face to have survived all this long. Emily had not lived for such a long time that she forgot what it meant to be alive. 

That is, until she met her team.  

Aaron Hotchner, or Hotch when he's on the job, or Aaron when they're exchanging hushed conversations in the jet after a case. The moment she walked into his office, Emily felt a rush of adrenaline shot through her body. She felt excited and ready for whatever was about to come. That was not thanks to Hotch's skeptical attitude towards her as she arrived, though she didn't blame him, if it were her team, she wouldn't have been so welcoming of a stranger butting in as well. 

Emily met his uptight nature and his not-so-serious side – the one everyone wonders if it exists. She met a team leader who protected his agents no matter what, a father that would do anything for his son and a friend who lend her a shoulder to cry on when she needed. 

Derek Morgan, or Morgan when he was kicking down doors, or Derek when she was teasing him about being a player. He had been a tough one to crack. Emily took a while to have Derek warm up to her, but she praised herself in completing the task. To this day, she didn't know at what point did they crossed the line of being coworkers on the job to annoying friends that act like children when they're on the same place. 

The guilt Emily felt when she died in Derek's arms did not compare to any other moment. The last thing she wanted was to lie and hurt one of the people she cared about the most. To this day, she's still learning how to forgive herself for doing what she had to do.  

Jennifer Jareau, or Jennifer when she's talking to parent's victims and authorities during a case, or JJ when it's late at night and they need each other's company to forget what they face every day. If it wasn't for her and Hotch, Emily wouldn't know how she would have survived. But she knows how it weighed both of them down to have to hide that secret from everyone else. Especially JJ.  

She's one of the most loyal people Emily has met in her entire life and her capacity of bringing comfort is unmatched. On lonely evenings, in Paris, Emily let cheetobreath win on Scrabble just so she could ask for a rematch and they could stay in contact for a little longer. Emily will be forever grateful to have JJ in her life.  

Spencer Reid, or Dr. Reid when he's racking his brain for an UnSub's whereabouts, or Spencer when he's rambling about the most random statistic on earth during a normal conversation. Emily didn't have favorites, she's not that kind of person, but she had to admit to have grown a soft spot for both Spencer Reid and Penelope Garcia.  

She's not proud to have added to his trauma, god knew how much Spencer suffered through the years he worked at the Behavioral Analysis Unit. And sometimes, Emily caught herself envisioning his life if she had never been a part of it, but that thought was quickly dismissed because Emily knew that she wouldn't be who she was today if she had not met his little quirks and endless curiosity across her journey.

Penelope Garcia, or Garcia when they needed her to access some encrypted online file, or Penelope when she's happily delivering cupcakes to their desks in the bullpen. The magic of working at the BAU was to have Penelope striding around with her colorful clothing and her bright voice in the morning. The horrors that they faced were momentarily forgotten by her bright persona, but just as she made people's days better, she needed some comfort once in a while as well. 

Emily made sure she understood that and that it was okay to break, because she would still be one of the strongest people Emily met at the end of the day.  

And, of course, the Emily Prentiss they help build back up. She would be nowhere near where she was right now if it weren't for those people, her team, her family. They saved her from her own undoing and, in some way, she saved each of them too.

She had destroyed her curse. Emily finally felt as if she was no longer tied to any prophecy. After such a long time, Emily finally felt like herself and truly alive.  

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

taglist: @ninkieminjaj ; @lilyviolets  

[selenityshiroi]

I can't even begin to explain how much Square Enix truly surprised me with Clive in FFXVI.

I stayed away from most of the marketing so I knew only his image and that SE wanted to appeal to Western Gamers with this game. Which led me to believe that he would be gruff and tough and vengeful. Because, let's be real, that is the impression we tend to have of Western Video Game protaganists.

And when the game opens we see a man who is fighting, doesn't seem to be invested in the cause but is just going along with the mission. Doesn't care too much about the bloody battle going on beneath his feet. So my impression wasn't really shaken by this introduction.

And then we go back. And oh boy.

Teenage Clive was a delight. Humble, compassionate, understood the difference between being handed something and having to work for it. His mother hated him for something he couldn't control but he didn't resent his brother who had the mother's love he was denied. He adored his brother who had 'the birthright' that could have been his. I adored this boy within minutes and I was shocked that this was the protaganist from the promo materials. So different than I was expecting.

And then Phoenix Gate happened. And I was filled with dread. Because that boy was probably going to gone. Destroyed by grief and vengeance. This was the event that was going to turn that nice young boy into the gruff and tough and mean older protaganist I was expecting.

But then it didn't.

Once we fell in with Cid and rescued Jill we start to see the older Clive. And he is after vengeance and he is hurt and he is suffering. But he is also still compassionate. He also still has a sense of justice. He also still understands that there is no job beneath a person and no person beneath a job (which is a very big theme for the game).

That vengeance, which I'm so used to seeing as a 'and I don't care what I have to do or who is in my way for me to get it' sort of thing, was not all consuming. It was something he sought but not at the expense of others.

When the first sidequest of 'take these plates of food to the tables' came up I genuinely believed that Clive was the sort of man who wouldn't bat an eye at waiting a table for the sake of the team. That it wasn't a task below him. And that single moment changed my entire impression of him.

When the story of the night of the Phoenix Gate unfolds it is painful. Grief and guilt that would tear someone apart. And it could have easily destroyed Clive. But then it didn't.

Because we get to the other surprising thing about Clive (and the story). And that is about acceptance and atonement.

Clive accepting the things that he did is something that is not only addressed in the story but it's also a major story point. But in a typical Western story I would expect atonement to take the shape of punishment and suffering. Self flogging guilt. Which are very Christian ideologies that are widespread in Western media. But that isn't the path this game took. It takes the path of atonement meaning reparation and working to change things for the future you want to see. Which reminded me very, very much of Fullmetal Alchemist (which I'm told is a story that has strong Buddist themes).

And then, just to really twist the knife into the false impression I had, we get the final aspect of his character that I wasn't expecting.

His ability to be open and honest. Especially with Jill, who had suffered and holds guilt in a similar way. Who looks like (at my current point in my playthrough) is about to go through a similar arc of self acceptance. But instead of holding in their pain they share it. They pull each other forward. And it's not only super refreshing for a leading pair in a pretty dark story it also reminds me of something else from FMA.

Roy and Riza. Two characters who did unspeakable things who then turn that guilt into action. Who work to change the world into a place where those atrocities do not need to happen again. Who understand that they may not be thanked for what they do or what they have done but will suffer that gladly to let others live free of the blood that stains their hands.

At this point all of those impressions I had going into the game are shattered into dust.

I adore Clive. I am invested in him so much more than I ever expected. I couldn't have expected any of this going into the game and I have never been so pleasantly surprised.

Bravo, SE.

[weird-kid-maxx]

I'm Not Him (And Never Will Be) (My Babysitter's A Vampire Benny Weir X Fem! OC)

Forewarning: I am putting Jesse as a good guy in all of these (except, MAYBE, a few) because I genuinely like Jesse and felt he could've had a redemption arc after the season 2 finale.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Prompt: The reader (OC) breaking down at an inconvenient moment after something seemingly harmless evokes a horrific memory.

Summary: The OC, Athena, has an abusive ex that used to hit her for every little thing. Fast-forward three years, and she's with Benny Weir. When two jocks get in a fight at school and accidentally injure her, she freaks, and the truth comes out.

Genre: Hurt/Comfort.

Warnings: Abuse; First Fight; Relationship Trauma; Abusive Ex; PTSD; Sweet Benny; Hurt Benny Weir; Hurt OC.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Third Person POV

Athena has been with Benny for four months, and yet all they did to this day was hold hands, share kisses, and cuddle. Now, Benny wasn't a pushy guy. She didn't want to get intimate or whatever, that was fine! He wasn't needy like that. He didn't want to make her uncomfortable, so he went at her pace. It's just...sometimes, he was confused. She seemed so fine one second, and then someone would snap, or yell or say something, and she'd go all tense and quiet, and he would wonder, not for the first time, if she was possibly hiding some dark secret. He wanted her to trust him. And she did, but...not with whatever was hurting her. He understood, but...it hurt.

Lately, he's been asking the vampires about Athena. Had they noticed anything different? Was she acting weird, or was it just him? "Don't push her," Jesse told Benny one day at lunch as Athena stood in line with Ethan and Sarah. "She'll tell you when she's ready. One of my biggest mistakes was pushing Sarah." He added. "That's why I lost her." "Oh. Okay." Benny said as the other three approached.

He spent the next few days sort of...analyzing Athena. If someone yelled, he watched her body language. He didn't mean to treat her like a science experiment, she was just worrying him.

One day, two jocks got in a fight. They were arguing pretty loudly when Jesse, Erica, Benny, and Athena left Math, right there in the hall, and were throwing insults back and forth. Now, usually, nobody would bother, but everyone in the hall felt that it would get violent in under ten seconds, so a girl ran to get the staff, and the taller one suddenly shoved the shorter one into the locker, and he tripped into the metal, slamming into Athena, knocking her to the ground with a slam that echoed painfully in Benny's ears.

At that point, Jesse snarled, shoving the two struggling humans apart as Athena scrambled to her feet and bolted, shoving past the crowd and nearly knocking another girl into the lockers. Benny, though he wanted to go after her, knew he had to let her breathe, and started helping Jesse separate the jocks, still shouting at one another, until teachers swarmed the hallway, pulling them apart. "Where's Athena?" Sarah gasped, eyes wide. "This way!" Erica called, running down the hall at human speed. The others shared glances and followed her into the closest closet.

She was in the corner, knees to her face, crying. "Athena!" Benny pushed past a startled Erica. No one had seen her cry, not like this. "Hey, hey, what--" He flinched as her hands flew up, pushing at him, and she whimpered, "Don't--don't touch me."

"Hey, it's me!" Benny blinked, hurt. She glanced up, and Benny's heart twisted. Her eyes were red and puffy, and she had claw marks on her cheeks, flushed pink, from her nails. "What happened?" Sarah asked. Jesse grabbed Sarah's arm. "Let's give them a minute, okay?" He asked, eyes checking Athena over. As the girls left the closet, he asked, "You okay, Thena?" She nodded. "Thank you," She whispered. Jesse smiled softly and told Benny, "We'll be right outside." He left, shutting the door carefully so it didn't slam.

"I'm sorry." Athena whispered, rubbing her sweaty hands on her jeans. "It's okay. What...what happened, why'd you freak so bad?" He asked. "Does it scare you when that happens?" He wondered. "Sort of?" She hedged. At his curious look, she sighed. "I had an ex. Remember me telling you about Jay?" She wondered, and he nodded. "Yeah, you said you broke up with him because it didn't work out." He recalled. "It didn't, because...he used to hurt me. He would...hit me a lot, and he'd call me names. He was really abusive and controlling, and now, because of him, if something happens--a fight too close, too much yelling, something resembling anger--I freak and have a panic attack." She said softly. Benny's eyes widened. "What?" He asked in a voice that made Athena wish she'd never opened her mouth. "Who...who'd hurt you, you're an awesome person!" He nearly yelled. She flinched. "I'm sorry, please..." She whispered.

"No, no, no, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." He whispered, reaching forwards, and stopped. "Can I hug you?" "Of course!" She said, wrapping her arms around Benny. She sunk into his arms. For every time she remembered Jay's harsh words or fists, Benny was there to chase it all away.

Outside the closet, Erica's eyes watered. "I never knew." She whispered, leaning against the wall. Sarah blinked, and a tear traced her cheek. "I don't think any of us did." She whispered, eyes flicking to Jesse's. The older vampire was glaring down the hall. "I'm gonna kill him." "No." The voice said, and the door opened. "Please, don't." Athena whispered, rubbing her still-pink cheeks dry of tears. "He hurt you, so let me kill him." Erica promised. "Guys, no. Just...stay with me. I need you guys here with me." Athena whispered, eyes watering again. "Okay. We can stay." Jesse sighed. Athena smiled. "Thank you." She turned to Benny, hiding her face in his striped hoodie. For a moment, Benny looked a little scary. His face was cold and flat, and his eyes were almost black. "You, uh...look a little...different," Sarah hedged. He glanced at her. "I...I'm taking her home." He grabbed Athena's hand and led her down the hall. Once they were gone, Sarah smiled. "I know where he lives." Erica and Jesse looked at her. "We're going hunting. Tonight." She snarled, stalking down the hall. Erica grinned, and Jesse laughed.

[caddy-crystal-queen]

Moon Knight and Daemons

So I'm losing sleep over something and I wanna hear honest opinions.

Been back on a moon knight kick as well as a His Dark Materials kick. That being said, I've started to wonder: what daemon(s) would the Moon Knight system have? Now I have no idea how someone with DID would work in the world of HDM, so I'm kinda going on a limb here and assume that a system's daemon would also have alters and alternate forms. I don't actually know if that's how it works, so please please please PLEASE do not take my word for it. I'm literally just doing this for fun.

So...what daemon would each alter have? Well, I'm glad you asked. Let's get into it

1. Steven Grant

Daemon: the Kestrel

This bird is small. Like really small. I believe it's actually the smallest of the raptors, but I could be wrong so don't quote me on that. Either way, the bird is small and folks tend to underestimate it, the same way Steven is rather underestimated by his peers as well as the system at first. The kestrel, despite its size, is still a bird of prey and important to the environment, just as Steven is still important to the moon knight system.

2. Marc Spector

Daemon: the Timber Wolf

Yeah I knew this one right off the bat. Marc's daemon is a wolf and no one can convince me otherwise. Here's why: wolves can function fine on their own, but they work best when in a pack (something we'll also see with Jake's, but we'll cross that bridge in a minute), which I feel is something Marc learns throughout the Moon Knight series. Wolves are also highly misunderstood animals, being depicted throughout history and lore as monsters and villains. Who else have been depicted in a similar way? People with DID unfortunately. These people aren't monsters, they're human beings who deserve to be loved and understood. And again, like the kestrel, wolves are important to the environment (they're actually a keystone species if I recall correctly), and Marc is, arguably, the most important personality in the moon knight system (a keystone, if you will).

3. Jake Lockley

Daemon: the Meerkat

Before you get your torches and pitchforks out, let me explain, as I had a REALLY hard time figuring this one out. Primarily because we haven't seen much of Jake at all in the series, and I personally have not read the comics. Please take it easy on me yall. So I chose the meerkat for one pretty big reason: they are the most murderous mammals on the planet aside from us, and Jake is the most bloody of the Moon Knight system (as far as we know). However this does not mean that he's not important to the system, or can't work well in a group. Like the wolf, a lone meerkat can, and often does, function well on its own but it eventually does need a mob. If you've seen Meerkat Manor, you're probably very familiar with meerkat society and how it functions, and just how brutal it can be. I feel that Jake, if we're ever gonna get a second season of Moon knight, is probably gonna go through a similar arc as Marc, where he learns to get along with the other two in the system rather than pushing them away like he seems to. Honestly I'm all for it, so bring it on Marvel (well, after the strike of course). And seriously, I just love the idea of seeing someone like Jake with something small and kind of adorable. I'm a sucker for that trope, and plus I think he'd find a meerkat to be pretty damn useful.

And those are the Daemons for the moon knight system. This was actually pretty fun to write but I think I'm gonna try and get some sleep now! Leave honest thoughts in the comments or reblog if you feel so inclined! Have fun ^.^

[elliepassmore]

Africa Risen review

Big thanks to Netgalley, Tordotcom, and the authors for an ARC in exchange for an honest review! The Blue House: Dilman Dila 3/5 stars I thought the concept of this one was interesting, an android attempting to remember her life and identity when she was a human, but had trouble with all the memory.sys and security.sys stuff. March Magic: WC Dunlap 5/5 stars I enjoyed the imagery in this one. Irl: Steven Barnes 5/5 stars I really enjoyed this story. Shango seems pretty unbearable at first, but he really comes through. I also liked the alternate/future version of justice and the intricacies of it. The Deification of Igodo: Joshua Uchena Omenga 3/5 stars This was an interesting story, but not really my thing. Mami Wataworks: Russell Nichols 5/5 stars I was somewhat confused by this one at first, but once I got a hang of the setting, I quite enjoyed the post-apocalyptic scene. Rear Mirror: Nuzo Onoh 5/5 stars This one was very entertaining. I liked the idea and imagery of an angry ghost tormenting the people going against her last/burial wishes. Door Crashers: Frank’s Zeph 3/5 stars The concept of this was intriguing and I think it really felt like it was going somewhere toward the end. However I was confused for most of the story. The Soul Would Have No Rainbow: Yvette Lisa Ndlovu 4/5 stars I liked how we jumped between the past and the present for this one. I also liked the mythological feeling the story has. A Dream of Electric Mothers: Wole Talabi 5/5 stars This one was interesting. I liked how it took contemporary beliefs and carried them forward to be adapted into a sci-fi world. The imagery was also very vivid in this one. Simbi: Sandra Jackson-Opoku 5/5 stars This is a pretty quick story, but I liked the variation on Mami Wata. Housewarming for a Lion Goddess: Aline-Mwezi Niyonsenga 5/5 stars I liked this story a lot. There’s a lot of imagery in it and the narrator had a dual-story thing going on. A Knight in Tunisia: Alex Jennings 5/5 stars This was definitely interesting. The shape of this world was somewhat confusing to me, but I liked the concept. The Devil is Us: Mirette Bahgat 3/5 stars I thought this was going to go somewhere but then it didn’t really, so… Cloud Mine: Timo Odueso 5/5 stars I liked this one and where it seemed to be going. I can definitely feel a larger character arc for Salim. Ruler of the Rear Guard: Maurice Broaddus 4/5 stars This was an interesting picture of future-America (or really a slightly exaggerated current America) and how people might find their way out of it. Peeling Time (Deluxe Edition): Tlotlo Tsamaase 2/5 stars TW implied rape I liked the ending of this, but the rest do it was fairly graphic and I wasn’t a fan. The Sugar Mill: Tobias S. Buckell 5/5 stars This story does a good job of showing the predatory nature of land development and of how ‘white vegans’ often prioritize animals over human lives. I liked the ghosts in this story, and I thought it was a funny touch that they enjoyed watching reality TV. The Carving of War: Somto Ihezue Onyedikachi 4/5 stars Interesting, but I was kind of confused. Ghost Ship: Tananarive Drive 5/5 stars This one head a good vibe to it. It feels like one thing at the start and then it becomes something else. I do wish we’d gotten to see Burden again though. Liquid Twilight: Ytasha Womack 4/5 stars This was a light story, though I don’t think I totally understood the ending. There are some implications there that I think I get, but it’s hard to tell. Once Upon a Time in 1967: Oyedotun Damilola Muees 4/5 stars I liked all the different magical creatures in the story. A Girl Crawls in a Dark Corner: Alexis Brooks de Vita 5/5 stars TW/ FGM, rape Unpleasant business but it has a satisfying ending. The Lady of the Yellow-Painted Library: Tobi Ogundiran 5/5 stars This was a fun little thriller/horror story. I enjoyed the anticipation of what would happen. When the Mami Wata Met a Demon: Moustapha Mbacké Diop 4/5 stars This was another horror-esque story, but it ended on a lighter note. The Papermakers: Akua Lezli Hope 5/5 stars I thought this one was cool. The paper magic and process of making paper are interesting to me. A Soul of Small Places: Mame Bougouma Diene and Woppa Diallo 5/5 stars TW mentions of rape This one is good, has a satisfying arc. I also like the ‘monster’ in this one. Air to Shape Lungs: Shingai Njeri Kagunda 4/5 stars The narrative here is in an unusual style. Interesting story though. Hanfo Driver: Ada Nnadi 4/5 stars This one is an entertaining story about misadventures with a hover bus. I did have some difficulty with it since it’s written in dialect. Exiles of Witchery: Ivana Akotowaa Ofori 5/5 This one is probably one of my favorites from the anthology. There’s magic and mayhem and solidarity, with a dash of danger. The Taloned Beast: Chinelo Onwualu 5/5 stars TW/ rape, abuse An overall good story about accepting who you are and standing with other people against the world. Star Watchers: Danian Darrell Jerry 3/5 stars I feel like this one had a lot of potential but doesn’t really have a lot of follow through. I want to know more about the Star Watchers and their community, and I think a slightly longer story could help with that. Biscuit and Milk: Dare Segun Falowo 4/5 stars This one was…weird, lol. It was definitely interesting and I think I liked it, but it is very weird.

[ljf613]

Decided to finally bite the bullet and read Magi: The Adventures of Sinbad.

In the middle of the Mariadel arc, and whoa does it get heavy.

[filipinoizukuu]

hello mr simp do you have any thoughts on the leeks 👀

FIRST OF ALL. THEY CAME SO FUCKING EARLY??? BRO I WAS ASLEEP

SECOND OF ALL

holy SHIT YALL

Okay, it's no secret that I'm an All Might stan. I LOVE All Might. Very very much. Not just as a simp, but genuinely, I enjoy his character SO MUCH.

--And unlike what some people may think, I'm not totally blind to his flaws. I know he sucks as a mentor and that he's done way more harm to Deku than good. He's.... not perfect. in every sense of the word. The whole point of AM's character is that he is a DEEPLY FLAWED individual— but at the end of the day, still good.

This new chapter gave me SOOO many new feelings. I'm not gonna lie to y'all and say I was a Stain apologist beforehand because I wasn't. I disliked Stain to a certain degree, but I also knew he was morally grey enough that I was able to still quite appreciate him as a character. This chapter was about EVERYTHING to me because I honestly did NOT expect Hori to go in this direction and for things to happen the way they did. It was too good to be true! Too fanfic-y! The disbelief I felt when I read what happened was on par with when Bakugou and Deku had that apology and kinda-hug in the rain!

But this disbelief is not because it was a bad thing.

I think the writing in Chapter 326 is phenomenal. The moment that All Might was really beginning to lose hope in not just himself as a hero, but himself as a PERSON... we finally hear the opinion of someone who would abso-fucking-LUTELY make or break the last of his spirit.

Stain is, as much as his views are pretty agreeable and his label is that of a vigilante, still a pretty shitty guy. He's tried to kill literal kids who got in his way, even if said kids made pretty dumb decisions. AM hearing what he has to say is absolutely mind-boggling to him because he knows all of that. He knows Stain is a shitty person and that his worldview is perhaps terribly skewed. He knows Stain has spent a hot minute frying his brains down in Tartarus and isn't good at making judgment calls. Knows that for all intents and purposes, Stain's opinions are not to be trusted.

But the thing is... Toshinori also knows that Stain, regardless of the soundness of his mind, is telling the truth.

Regardless of how fucked-in-the-head Stain is, we as readers are able to acknowledge that he isn't blinded by hero worship. Sure, he's bitter, cynical, and quite the absolutist--but Stain is still clear-headed enough to be able to see AM's flaws for what they are and accept them, ultimately proving to Toshinori that the power of All Might was never his own but rather the legacy that he inspired.

The society MHA takes place in is flawed. We all know this. Heroes, as a concept, had been corrupted into being purely about good and evil. Purely winning fights for money or fame or the abstract concept of victory (coughs Endeavor and the no.1 spot coughs), making heroism as we know it about flashiness and power instead of mercy and the desire to help others.

All Might symbolizes the ideal version of the Hero Society. He represents doing the best you can. Being a hero until you reach your limits, and then going even past that. He symbolizes pure intention and the desire to be a hero not for material gains but because of the pure want to make society a better and safer place. Stain refers to Kamino Ward and the statue as a "holy land" because he believes that through and through, AM's only had the purest of intentions and morals. To him, Toshinori was like a deity that had no fault in making society what it was in the present because that accountability fell on the generations of heroes that failed to fulfill his legacy.

The point being, Stain understood that All Might was fundamentally not about 'being there' for everyone 24/7, but rather the message his presence had sent.

All Might's monologue at the beginning of the chapter essentially boiled down to the ideas that:

A. He regrets not being there properly for Deku

B. His image was a delusion that ultimately led to the downfall of hero society.

To break this down, his problem with Deku is his inability to be a competent mentor. It shows that he has led him down dangerous and horrible paths (Deku's stubbornness to do things by himself and his 'dark' arc post-war), and is unable to bring him back into the light even if he tries. It was only when Class 1-A had intervened that they were able to get Deku to rest and let people tag along, after all, which is why Toshinori was far too embarrassed to follow him into UA's walls even after everyone had come out with umbrellas.

Stain disproves this in two ways.

First, he says that it was never about All Might's ability to actually be there for people. The whole point of what inspired Deku to be the inherently good-hearted "true hero" he is today is because of the values that AM's brand had instilled in him as a child. AM's biggest positive impacts came from behind the screen where he was used as the proof that true heroes can and do exist. Deku does want to be exactly like All Might, yes, which is why we see Toshinori leading him down the same path that he walked--but the underlying message of this is that the very first thing All Might gave him even before OfA was the courage to help fix society.

I do believe Deku is an innately compassionate person. Most people in the series are. However, what makes All Might's smile so uniquely impactful to what it did to Hero Society is the way it gave people courage to help people. Less hesitation. Less bystander syndromes. The ability to move without thinking. Because you can feel the want to help a person, but the courage to be nosey and actually do it? That's portrayed as something AM's image teaches people.

The second way he disproves AM's insecurity of dragging Deku down is that he makes it clear that this pain is somewhat of a necessity in reforming society. He says, interestingly enough, that this is but the 'middle process' in reforming society. This spills over to how he addresses Problem B, but what Stain is essentially saying here is that this sort of brutality and isolation that Izuku faces is impermanent. A phase. It implies that even if Deku is struggling and Toshinori is unable to help him, it is something that needs to happen before they re-realize the ideal heroes All Might's image is meant to create.

The second problem in regards to how All Might feels about current society (how it's collapsing because of him, etc. etc.) is more interestingly addressed. There are many things that Stain says--like how Toshinori doesn't need to actually be the one to fix society with his bare hands. The current society is not his fault because of the fact that it is not finished developing. I'm not sure if I can go so far as to say that Stain means this in the sense of the Scorched Earth method of tearing everything down to build it back up better-- but I can say that Stain still has faith in society to rebuild after this period of chaos.

This rebuilding starts with the old generation of heroes correcting what they messed up (i.e. Endeavor v Dabi) and more importantly, paving the way for a better generation of heroes that was inspired by All Might's image. Heroes that are led by people like Deku, who is defined by his proclivity to help without thinking. The violent deconstruction of society is about exposing society to the raw truth of All Might's image that not everybody can be as strong as him-- which is why we have to take care of each other.

When the lady comes in to remove the sign and start cleaning the statue, it's symbolic. It's a clear metaphor that the past few chapters are the turning point for society as a whole, and how people are starting to remember what real heroism is. From the distrust that was seeded in society ever since LoV had surfaced, we are seeing that trust being returned TEN-FOLD now that people can see not only the mask of a hero's smile, but also the person underneath.

I think it's some really neat symbolism here too about how Deku, who's metal mouth guard was literally all about representing All Might's smile, is shed.

This is hero society dropping their masks. Letting people see them for as they are. Toshinori revisiting the statue in this form makes all the more impact because he shed his mask ages ago during the Kamino Bust, so this is him coming face to face with the image he's created and seeing the differences between them, and how his image continues to live on even after he's almost completely Quirkless. The lady cleaning the All Might statue shows off the fact that things can be repaired again--that society can be clean (hehe stain pun) again.

It's interesting to me here how Stain offers the information from Tartarus.

He doesn't care anymore about his life. It's evident. He disagrees with what the LoV is doing, but believes enough in Deku to think that it's time for him to retire the mantle of 'Stain'. Unless this is another test, it's very odd for me to hear that Stain is offering a blade and his life to someone he isn't even sure is All Might.

But the impact of this action reads loud and clear.

This is Stain taking pity on All Might. This is him realizing that All Might too is a person behind the hero. That Toshinori Yagi is incapable of doing anything past the image he had already created. By offering that knife and information on Tartarus, Stain is giving control back to Toshinori. He is giving AM the chance to do something big again to help society's reconstruction. To be a part of the revolution that he so badly deserves to see. That knife is essentially an exit ticket from the sidelines, and one last chance for All Might to be able to see what his image has done for people.

I personally think that the main reason Stain is willing to die then and there by Toshinori's hand, despite not being sure that he is All Might to begin with, is because of the final impact it creates that it isn't about Toshinori Yagi's true power as a person, but the image of All Might. It is because he looks like the symbol of peace, that Stain (the literal HERO KILLER) feels comfortable laying his life in his hands and giving away valuable information.

If that isn't a great testament to the power of AM's image, I don't know WHAT is.

I guess all I have to say is I absolutely love what Stain did in this chapter. Everything felt so incredibly symbolic and emotional and as someone who absolutely ADORES All Might and what he stands for in the story, this felt like a cool balm after seeing Deku tragically reject his bento box a good few chapters ago. I have a few more opinions about symbolism, and how I think Deku's generation of heroes is going to stray from the old gen, but I think that's a discussion for another time.

Thanks for reading 'til the end!

[sixeyesgojo]

I’ll Be Your Enemy

Summary: Gojo Satoru is willing to do anything for you. As long as it helps you heal from what haunted your night.

Pairing: Gojo x Reader

Word count: 2,019

Content warning: implied but unspecified mental illness, mentions of self-harm (scratching), mentions of character death

A/N: Kind of stumbled upon this masterpiece of a song and I thought it would be ideal for some Gojo HURT. This entire thing takes place after the Cursed Womb Arc, so to say: after Yuji dies.

Song: Be Your Enemy by Taemin ft. Wendy

PREQUEL HERE: Pictures of You

Quickly, quickly. The key was inserted into the keyhole and turned. The door lock clicked faintly, signaling that the door has been unlocked. Satoru made sure to open and close the door softly as he entered the familiar apartment. Putting the spare key into his pocket, he slid out of his shoes. Usually he would have made some big noise to ‘announce his arrival’ but not this time. He left his shoes neatly at the genkan of the residence and slipped into the white slippers that always stood by the wooden door, an extra pair just for him.

23 minutes ago. “Hello?” Satoru had picked up the phone. “Gojo-san! Finally the call went through. I’m glad I am able to reach you now,” the voice on the other end said. “Yo, Ijichi, what’s up?” Satoru greeted. He had been sent to a pretty rural area of Japan to get rid of some pesky curses and the cell phone reception was poor in that place, so it wasn’t surprising that calls didn’t go through at times. In addition to that, some curses that manifested had an electrical ability, which impaired the cell towers at place even more. Almost as if planned. “Gojo-san, I think you need to come back as fast as you can,” the man with glasses on the other end of the line stated calmly. “Why?” was the only thing the white-haired sorcerer said in response. Somehow, he had a strange feeling in his gut. The tone in Ijichi’s voice didn’t do anything to calm this odd feeling either.

“It’s L/N-san. Something horrible happened and I don’t think she is taking it well. I did my best to calm her but I’m at wits’ end too…” Ichiji explained vaguely. Satoru was experiencing a feeling he hadn’t felt in a long time - his stomach churned, it felt like his guts were wrenching inside him - at the mention of your name. “Ijichi,” he said in a relatively calm voice. He was lucky his voice wasn’t betraying him by showing what he truly felt in that moment. Satoru’s feet were set in rapid motion. “Stay calm. I need you to explain to me what exactly happened.”

Gojo Satoru might be many things. A tease, a teacher (supposedly), a cruel man, a strong sorcerer, a crazy coach, a walking menace to some, protective, an inspiration to a handful, a venti-sized manchild, idiotic, a sweets maniac, a lifelong student to Yaga, playful, a pillar of the Jujutsu world… but most importantly, he was a caring person. This goes without saying for his students and especially his loved ones. What Ijichi just said on the phone had left his heart stinging in his chest. He was in the kitchen, leaving the bag he brought with him on the table.

“Alright. I will tell you what happened, Gojo-san.” “I am listening.” “I am not sure if you are aware that this happened,” the suit-clad man began, “but one of the missions that was originally assigned to you - a case of utmost priority of a cursed womb - was suddenly taken off of your pile and reassigned…” Satoru’s eyes narrowed underneath the black fabric. The beginning already left a bad taste in his mouth; missions assigned to him were usually first grade or even special grade and he knew all too well that there were nowhere enough first grade, let alone special grade, sorcerers around. So who had it been assigned to? “...to your three first-year students,” Ijichi finished with a sigh. The sickening hotness of rage filled Satoru’s whole body. Already having realized the scenario that must have taken place, he still asked for confirmation, “What grade?” “...Special grade. One casualty.” The picture that you had taken of him, his first years and yourself (so carefully hung up on your wall at home) flashed in front of his inner eye. He clenched his teeth so hard as he wordlessly hung up; it hurt. It hurt so badly.

Such an atrocious inhumane act coated in malice. He was going to kill these dirty-playing bastards. However, that would have to wait until later. Much later. Satoru couldn’t leave you to your own devices, not in this state. The scenario he concluded for himself earlier replayed in his mind several times as he made his way through your completely dark apartment. His heart stung with each beat. It was almost as if someone drove a blade through his chest repeatedly.

When he stood in front of the closed door of your bedroom, he heard soft sobs coming from inside. Should he knock to let you know someone came? He wasn’t sure what to do. He gave the door two soft knocks and entered the room. It was your hunched form on the bed, no doubt. Satoru could not see your face with the way your back was facing him. Slowly he made his way to your bed and crouched down to face you. Your face was swollen and tear-stained, a sight he didn’t see often. His large hand rested on your shoulder and gently rubbed it, a silent question hung in the air.

Finally, you looked at him with your swollen eyes. Almost instantly, your sobs got louder and you reached out for the tall sorcerer. “S-Satoru…” you hiccuped in-between sobs. “Yeah. I’m here, I’m here,” he reassured you and stroked the wet hair out of your puffy face as you threw yourself around him, relentlessly crying into his broad shoulders. The white-haired man enclosed his arms around you but it wasn’t to hug you for comfort.

He scooped your delicate frame up and wrapped a warm blanket around you before leaning your body against the headboard of the bed. He sat next to you on the bed and guided your head onto his shoulders. Your violent sobbing stopped but tears were still flowing freely. 

If there was someone who understood the agony, bitterness and distress someone in this line of work had to face, it was Gojo Satoru. The path of a Jujutsu Sorcerer was painted black and red by trials and tribulations. This was why Satoru was so hell-bent on resetting the world he called his obligation. “If you feel exhausted, just lean on me for a second,” his calm voice sounded through the room. There was no answer from you. Even if there was silence, your feelings reached his heart and he spoke again. “Do you want to tell me about it?” he asked gently. Let it go with me. It’ll be easier to shake this burden off and share it, he thought. Of course, he would never dare force you. You nuzzled into his shoulder, as if to get even closer physically.

Ultimately, the woman sucked in a breath and with a shaky voice and recounted everything in her point of view. “I-I.. was on a mission when I… got a call from Ijichi. ‘Something wasn’t right’, he said and… t-told me about the cursed womb. As soon as I heard… that they sent y-your students there, I rushed to the location but…”, you hiccuped, “...I was too late… Y-Yuji, he-” You sobbed hysterically into his shoulder. Satoru turned to you to wipe away the tears and snot with a tissue. “Shhh, I’m here, I’m here”, he reassured once again, “I’ll fix it somehow.” It was just as he thought: those damned higher ups.

“H-How? This is not… something… you can f-fix, Satoru… not even you,” you continued bawling into his shoulders. I’ll kill all the higher ups, he thought to himself. “I don’t know but I’ll be damned if I can’t do something to change this detestable, loathsome and bloody world we live in,” his voice seethed with anger but it quickly died down as he re-focused on the main topic at hand, “there has to be something I can do, I’ll even drag out Sukuna myself if I have to.” “Please, Satoru…” Your whisper was faint and weak, “I… saw Yuji’s corpse... on the ground... I just want to see him one last time…”

Being a Jujutsu Sorcerer undoubtedly put a heavy strain on your mental wellbeing; nobody was spared from it, not even the great Gojo Satoru. Unfortunately, you were one of the people who were much more affected by incidents like these. He realized how badly it hurt your heart, he knew how much all the students meant to you and he knew just how much more fragile you were than you let on in front of other people. Where there is light, there must be shadow. It wasn’t like he was left unscathed by it either but right now, his utmost priority was you.

“Right,” the male sorcerer murmured more to himself. He still had to check something. “I want you to show me your arms, please.” If this had been a command, it had to be the gentlest one you had ever heard. Maybe it was the fact that there was a hint of pain infused in the way he spoke to you just now that made you show your arms so willingly, or maybe it was the fact that he always sounded so earnest when he took care of you like this. He genuinely cared; it was something you shouldn’t be surprised about, considering how long the two of you have known and cared for each other, but it never ceased to leave you in awe. You held out your arms for him to see.

As carefully as possible, the man examined your arms, his touch ghosting over your skin. It was a good thing he came prepared. The angry red lines, dry blood and broken skin on both of your forearms seemed to scream at him: you hurt yourself again. Without a doubt, he felt guilty. “I’ll be right back,” he announced as he slipped away from the bed after fixing your position and stroking your hair tenderly. A few moments later, your tall friend was back with a few medical supplies. Sitting back on the bed, he started to clean and treat your injuries. Besides a few hiccups and whimpers from your side, silence befell the room.

“Don’t you want to curse and insult me?” His eyes were still fixed on bandaging your arms. “No,” was all you said in response, fearing that your voice would give in. “You should though. After all, it was technically my fault...” Even though you were hurting, you knew Satoru was hurting all the same deep down in his heart, seeing that his precious students were the victims in this case. Satoru really treasured disciples. You took a few deep breaths before you replied, “Please don’t ever blame yourself for this… I know you wouldn’t have… let this shit happen. I know how much you adore them.”

“If it makes you feel better... if it can help you heal, I’ll take it. Any words are fine. I can deal with all the painful words…” Strong arms wrapped around you and pulled you to his chest. It was rare but his voice… unmistakably cracked for a second. A shaky chuckle left your lungs, “Please Satoru,” you wrapped your arms around him as well and nuzzled into his shirt again, “I could never treat you like that. You are everything to me but an enemy. Have always been.”

“I’ll be anything you need. I’ll even be your enemy if you ask me to… so please tell me, so that it doesn’t hurt you anymore…” he said shakily. The blindfolded man had masked his pain up until now, for your sake. It was your time to comfort him. Giving him shelter, like he had done for you. He had already experienced far too much hurt.

“Satoru, all I’ll ever need you to be in my life… is the important and comforting presence you have always been. Don’t change. If things are too much, too overwhelming and you become tired, you can lean on me too. I will never leave you.”

There was nothing left to say, no need. It was enough for both of you to be in each other’s comforting presence.

Taglist: @gojos-mochi​ @megumifushi @bleueluna

[stillness-in-green]

Why Deku's ultimatum to Overhaul is bad and he should feel bad

This is a bit outside my normal character wheelhouse, but I really need to get a rant about it off my chest, so here goes:

The Deku and Overhaul scene in Chapter 316 is terrible. It is fucking terrible.

I took a whirl around Overhaul's tag up through when the leaks first started dropping, but didn't immediately see anyone talking about why it's so fucking terrible, only concerns about letting Overhaul see Eri (understandable, but baseless, I think), some empathy towards Overhaul's current state (totally warranted!), some snark about Deku being So Done with Overhaul (haha because who cares about Deku's stated goal of trying to understand villains, right?), and, worst of all, some cooing about how Deku was being so compassionate and noble by offering Overhaul that olive branch.

Deku was not being compassionate and noble there. Deku was being arrogant, small-minded, and so shockingly cruel that it leaves me speechless that anyone could think his stunted and hard-hearted "offer" reflects well on him.

Deku's entire motivation in this arc has been wrestling with the realization that he might have been able to avoid some of the desperate battles of his past if he'd understood more about the villains he fought. He thought of three very specific people--Stain, Muscular, and Overhaul--as he reflected, "Maybe it wouldn't have had to go that way if I'd understood them better." He then thought of Gentle Criminal and La Brava, people who he’d come to some understanding of, who he’d been able to soften the conclusion of his battle with by going along with Gentle's fiction downplaying what had happened between them. The whole line of thought was intended to contextualize his newfound desire to save Shigaraki.

It soon became apparent that Stain, Muscular and Overhaul were, in fact, encounters that he would be revisiting, as a chance to see how he'd grown since he faced them, and as a dry-run on reaching out to villains that would give him a chance to practice ways he might reach out to Shigaraki when the time comes.

Well, based on his performance so far, the idea that Deku might be able to reach Shigaraki is laughable.

Firstly, his tentative questions to Muscular were ill-timed, all wrong for the middle of a battle. Muscular laughed him off, and I don’t think there’s any version of that scenario in which he would have done otherwise. Muscular was a huge threat, gleefully violent, disinterested in conversation about his history. Obviously, right in the middle of a fight was no kind of time to try to figure out what made the man tick! But Deku didn’t get the luxury of choosing the circumstances of that encounter, so yes, that battle probably was unavoidable, certainly if Deku wanted to stop him from doing further damage. But the idea that because Deku couldn't reach him right then and there, it's impossible for Deku--or, indeed, for anyone--to reach him at all is fallacious. Not every person has to be able to like or understand every other person. If Deku couldn't reach Muscular, so what? That doesn't mean it's impossible that someone might. And that means an obligation to treat Muscular like a human being, to afford him human rights, to not stop trying to find a way to rehabilitate him, even as you safeguard other people against him.

Deku's battle with Muscular being unavoidable was not some great triumph, for all that the narrative used it as an opportunity to let him show off how far he’d come in mastering One For All. In the way that matters, the way that Deku himself is currently trying to better, he hasn't advanced at all. Imasuji Goto represented his first test in the lead-up to saving Shigaraki, and Deku failed it.

His next trial was Overhaul.* Here, again, was someone who Deku was explicitly trying to understand. So what was the one thing that was most key to understanding Overhaul's current motivation? What was the one thing that Overhaul was ranting about out loud, incessantly? And what did Deku conspicuously fail to ask about? Overhaul's relationship with Pops.

This was so easy. So obvious. And Deku didn’t even try. All he could think about in the moment he was faced with that broken man was the little girl that man hurt--all thoughts of trying to understand where the man himself was coming from went right out the window, flown away in an instant. Instead of asking about why Overhaul feels the way he does, he demanded that Overhaul feel the way Deku wanted. He was essentially holding the only person Overhaul cared about hostage for the remorse he wanted Overhaul to feel.

I'm not going to try to armchair diagnose Overhaul with mental conditions. I don't have the educational background, and I'm positive Horikoshi doesn't. But it seems pretty clear that asking Overhaul to feel guilt about Eri was asking for something that he might not be capable of feeling, at least not without years of therapy that he was plainly not getting in Tartarus. And if Overhaul is not capable of feeling that guilt, then what does denying Overhaul his meeting actually solve? Who does it help? It doesn’t help Eri. Doesn’t help the old man. It certainly doesn’t help Overhaul himself. The only person who gets any satisfaction out of demanding remorse from Overhaul is Deku. And even Deku didn’t look like he found it very satisfying!

Another failure. A meaninglessly cruel, petty failure. A failure that served only to hurt a man who was already a live wire of agony, to sentence an old man to a coma he might never wake from without Overhaul's expertise, and to deprive Eri of the only actual family she had left.

And look, Pops might very well not be the ideal guardian for Eri, and I'm not saying he should get to "keep" her just because of the blood connection, but it's not like he cheerfully handed her over to Overhaul and walked out the door! He turned to Overhaul because he trusted Overhaul, because he wanted someone to help Eri and thought that maybe Overhaul could. And when Overhaul's thoughts about Eri took a very dark turn, Pops first denied his request about using her to further his research and then, when Overhaul kept pushing it, chose Eri over the kid he personally took in from the streets by telling Overhaul that he needed to leave the Shie Hassaikai if he couldn't muster any more respect for human life than that.

But, you know, Eri is so cute with Aizawa and stuff. And Pops was a criminal. Probably. Maybe? I mean, he was yakuza, anyway, so he obviously must have been a criminal even if the police never actually arrested him. Apparently, this means it's okay to just leave him in a coma forever! Even though Overhaul absolutely has enough medical expertise that letting him talk to a neurologist about what he did to Pops might enable them to figure out how to wake Pops up even without Overhaul being able to use his quirk to undo the damage. Hell, Overhaul is also the person alive who has the best handle on how Eri's quirk works. He might even know what her accumulation condition is. Maybe a better thing to ransom his access to Pops with would be Overhaul telling Aizawa everything he knows about Eri's quirk so Aizawa can use the knowledge to help her get a better handle on it.

But no. Obviously undoing some small part of the concrete harm Overhaul did was less important than how Deku felt about that harm.

And there's more! Oh, is there ever. I called Deku arrogant before; let me circle back to that.

Deku said that if Chisaki would feel the way Deku wanted him to feel, then Deku would uphold the promise to let Overhaul see Pops. But where in hell did Deku get off making that claim? Deku is a student. He's not a pro. He has no authority, medical, legal, carceral or otherwise. He has no say in where Overhaul goes or who he's allowed to see.

What the fuck? What the actual fuck? What kind of strings did Deku think he could pull that he could just casually make that claim without so much as going into a huddle with Hawks and Endeavor about it first? How inflated has this kid's sense of importance gotten that he made Overhaul that promise without even stopping to think about whether it was something he was in any position to ensure? It was such a bullshit ultimatum, not only because of how needlessly obstructive it was, but because it was so formless.

"If only you would feel a wish to apologize to Eri…" Okay, so what if Overhaul goes back to prison and, three days later, calls out to say, "Okay, I thought about it and I really feel like I want to apologize, now can I see Pops already?" Who gets to make that judgment call? Deku? Is he going to drop his faux-vigilante act and come visit Overhaul in prison just so he can squint at the man really hard to see if he's lying? Is Deku going to delegate the call to someone else? All Might? Hawks? A prison warden? A psychologist? Who? Who gets to be the one to say, "Okay, I think his remorse is genuine."

Then, once that call has been made, how many people have to arrange for Overhaul to be escorted out of prison and to whatever hospital Pops is in? Will Deku get to oversee that visit? Does he think he can overturn a warden declaring, "The scum doesn't deserve a visit, and the old man probably doesn't either," or a doctor protesting, "I'm not letting that man anywhere near my patient!"

The hell of it is, I think Deku could do all of that. He's got a close personal connection to All Might, who was basically a demi-god to this society for decades; he has the ear of the current top three heroes. Everyone is apparently convinced that the power to save this society rests solely in Deku's hands; I'm sure he could ask for anything he wanted. But the fact that that is the case suggests that this society is not even slightly turning away from its dependence on heroes dictating its morality. A hero having the sole right to dictate, out of hand, based on his personal feelings, the fate of people designated "villains" while the rest of society turns away is exactly what Shigaraki is angry about.

The only thing worse than Deku perpetuating the worst problems of hero society in an arc that's supposed to be about him finding a better way is that he didn’t even stop to think about it. It never even occurred to him that that was what he was doing. He thought that what he was asking of Chisaki was just and fair, and thus, he didn’t need to ask for any second opinions or permissions; he didn’t need to think about what would actually be feasible, about what was best for the people involved. He'd made his judgment call about a villain, and that's all there was to it. The villain could fall in line or--nothing. There isn't actually another choice. Hero's way or nothing

I hate it. I hate it. I don't care about whether Overhaul "deserves" to suffer; heroes making the cold decision that they will make him suffer is antithetical to everything a carceral system intended to rehabilitate prisoners stands for. And yes, Japan does at least claim on paper that the goal of incarceration in state hands is rehabilitation.

Restorative justice is superior to retributive justice. It's better for society and it's better for individuals. It is kinder, it is more compassionate. Retributive justice poisons people. It perpetuates suffering for no reason but moral grandstanding. Individuals are allowed to forgive or not forgive anyone they want, but a society should conduct itself with an eye to the long-term welfare of all of its people. That means that even the worst kinds of criminals still have human rights. It means not inflicting pain that serves no purpose.

I've gotten off-track here. Yes, I think that if Overhaul could feel regret about Eri, that would obviously be a positive development for his character. It'd hurt like hell, but it would be a hurt that indicated he was becoming a better person, a person who wanted to do more good, less ill, with his life and efforts. But you can't mandate that someone become a better person. No ultimatum handed down from on high is going to change Overhaul's heart. Telling someone, "I'll help you, but only if you only feel the way I want you to feel. Otherwise, you can just stay there and suffer," is not reaching out to help people who are suffering in the dark, which is, again, what Deku claimed he wanted to do, what he begged for Nagant's help in doing, the way he insisted to the vestiges that OFA should be used.

Deku writing people off because they don't conform to his expectations, because they can't be "good" the way he wants them to be, nor even "bad" in ways he can understand, is him failing to live up to his own expressed ideals. "I wish you'd feel bad about hurting people," wasn't enough to reach Muscular or Overhaul, and it damn well shouldn't be enough to reach Shigaraki.

Cruelty does not beget kindness. You cannot treat people with only callousness and severity, then condemn them for not taking the opportunity to grow. You have to give them opportunities to better themselves. For Overhaul, giving him an opportunity would be letting him help the man he wronged and then moving forward from there. Telling him to feel regret about Eri or else? That's doing nothing but sweeping his pain back under the rug.

---

*I have more or less exhausted my outrage over Lady Nagant in chats with friends, so I'll spare the rant on how disjointed, contradictory and ludicrous her turn was; the gist is "very, on all counts."

---

P.S. Anyone who says that Overhaul "has nothing left to live for" is being a level of ableist that defies description. Prosthetics exist. Assistive devices exist. Speech-to-text software exists. Overhaul is intelligent, driven and highly educated. Even if he never got prosthetics at all, there would still be things he could contribute to the world if he were motivated to do so. The better thing to do, though, would be to get the man some damn prosthetics, hook him up with the neurologist consulting on Pops' case, and let the two of them get on with the matter of waking up the old man.

P.P.S. Overhaul spent six months in solitary confinement. The United Nations considers solitary confinement exceeding 15 days to be a form of torture. Solitary confinement creates severe mental health issues and exacerbates existing ones. It frequently leads to a deadening of empathy, something Overhaul has in little enough amounts as it is. It is absurd to ask a man who's just come out of these conditions to "feel sorry for what you did to Eri," especially if you're planning to turn around and send him right back to solitary. Tartarus is inhuman, and the only reason more of the escapees aren't total wrecks like Overhaul is because Horikoshi clearly didn't bother to do the reading on the wide array of problems that those characters should be experiencing physically, mentally and socially.

[disaster-vampire]

since you know dante so well, i feel you should analyze hannibal S3 through the lens of the inferno 👀 since it's brought up so often

i've seen some inferno/hannibal comparisons before and honestly i don't like most of them. possibly because i have very specific views towards both pieces of media. also i really wouldn't say i know a lot about dante, i assure you there's plenty of folks that know more (ie my grandpa knows all three books of the divine comedy by memory). i'm but a very opinionated italophone.

before we start: general tw for blaspheming on my part both against the christian god and towards dante, since many seem to regard the dude as a god himself.

alright so. let's see how long this gets.

i know you asked abt s3 and the inferno and while yeah that would be the most obvious parallel since they really lathered it on pretty thick, i really think the entire show parallels the arc of the divine comedy, each season going hand in hand with a book from the trilogy.

the inferno opens with dante having a mid-life crisis of faith. he finds himself in a 'dark forest' and when he finally reaches the light he is blocked right in front of it by three beasts that represent cardinal vices. virgil saves him from the beasts, but to come back to the world of the living dante will have to travel through hell, purgatory, and lastly paradise. will's three beasts are garrett jacob hobbs as a manifestation of guilt, encephalitis, and isolation.

much like will, dante goes through hell recoiling from horrors of his own creation. he can't even describe some of the things he sees in hell, and often faints from the sight of them, yet comes up with some pretty horrible punishments all on his own and doles out judgement on whoever he pleases based on his own moral code. of course in his book, not irl, though if i remember correctly he did participate in a war, so who knows.

hannibal does seem a sort of virgil, as he sweeps in to rubber stamp will, letting him into hell proper, and will graham's dark forest is a thicket of corpses. at the end of s1, much like dante and virgil, will sees the face of the devil as he lifts hannibal's veil.

the real virgil might be beverly, considering her nearly unwavering faith in will and her no-bullshit attitude, on top of how she always seems to stabilise will when he's in dark places simply by being down to earth.

at the same time this exact same formula is mirrored in hannibal, though much more subtly. hannibal's dark forest is made of loneliness. he starts to fall in love from the moment he meets will, and he can see the glimpse of his own light: being understood for the first time in his life. but he has his own beasts, and he will have to go through his own journey to reach the highest peak of paradise and see the face of god.

dante's purgatory is nearly the same as the inferno, the only difference being that these sinners will eventually be accepted into heaven, and that is somewhat mirrored in the first and second season, as they both follow a similar plot. trust is slowly gained and built upon, secrets start to tangle our mains up, there is a horrible betrayal. will is released from the temporary purgatory of his cell, where he'd been imprisoned for the crime of seeing hannibal for who he really was, and thinks his ticket to heaven will be one more act in the name of justice. at the end of the purgatory, virgil must leave dante, as he can't enter paradise, and leaves him in the hands of his unrequited beloved, beatrice. at the end of season 2, will has to be left behind by hannibal, as he was not ready to follow hannibal into the "paradise" that hannibal had built for them. and in reverse, will must let hannibal go and find his own "paradise" in a "ready made family," as hannibal calls it.

you would think the fight with the red dragon is the moment when they see the devil in the inferno, but imo it's the part where beatrice brings dante to meet god. either way, whether they survived the fall or not, they have seen the face of god, and god is their love.

my dearest anon. you sent me this at midnight and it is now 1.45am and this is how far i'm willing to go without taking out the books and rewatching the show. i have gone through my own journey. i now see the light of pillow comfy. goodnight, have fun taking this apart, i shall slumber.

[dreamkidddream]

So far of reading your writing, I really love it! :)) May I request Kunikida, Dazai and Ranpo having an younger member of the agency being a sort of subordinate of them but acts a lot like a younger sibling to them? She's just really pure hearted and soft and really looks up to them so she likes helping them out a lot. Just some fluff because my boys deserve all love and affection

Awww thank you so much for the compliment!! This request is so cute, and yes, all the boys deserve all the love and affection that is possible cause they go through too much 😭 Anon requested this as platonic, and reader is gender neutral. Also, I wasn’t too sure what the age should be, so I went with Kyoka’s age, which is 14. Hope you enjoy!

TW: Mentions of suicide in Dazai’s part, but nothing too heavy or specific is mentioned. It does get kinda sad though, but it has a happy ending. Also, slight spoiler for season 2/Dark Era Arc, but nothing too major

Young ADA Member Acting like a Younger Sibling to: Kunikida, Dazai, and Ranpo

Kunikida

Okay, so when you first started at the office, people (specifically Naomi and Junichiro) were nervous when you got paired up with Kunikida. And Kunikida isn’t a bad man by any means, but he can be very, very, very strict

And how well do rules stick with kids/younger people? Exactly. It just sounded like a bomb waiting to explode

And you look so soft and so sweet! What if he made you cry?!

Which Naomi threatened to draw blood if he did

Even Kunikida himself was nervous. This was not written in his notebook to be a glorified babysitter!

But the President insisted, putting faith into you that you’ll be a great addition to the team and that he can lead you on the right path and not into trouble like some people he won’t mention (Dazai)

That was all that he needed to hear, and he took those words very serious. He won’t let the President down, and he wasn’t going to let you down either. You guys were gonna give it your all, whether you were ready to or not

But, to everyone’s surprise (really his) you both adapted well. You treated him with respect, said yes sir, no sir, tidied up both of your desks (which were right next to each other), you even tried to abide by his stern schedule without any complaints

You were a great help on missions too, you didn’t recklessly throw yourself into danger, and you made sure to look out for citizens to keep them safe and out of danger

And that wasn’t it, oh no

You made sure to bring him snacks (atleast the ones that he said were ideal), made sure that he was keeping hydrated and not tensed up all the time (working in this office will do that to you), and to make his workload as light as possible

After seeing him go off on Dazai for the 1000th time and getting wound up over a case that wasn’t getting any leads, you saw how stressed and frustrated he was getting. Mumbling to himself about how could he “replace the President if he couldn’t do this right”So you tapped on your shoulder, with one goal in mind: To comfort him

When you tapped his shoulder, he turned and yelled, “WHAT NOW?!”, right into your face

Time stood still as everyone froze, shocked. Even Kunikida himself after he saw it was you.

He felt immediately guilty, about to apologize for losing his cool when you began speaking

“Mr. Kunikida, please don’t stress too much. It’s not good for your heart! And don’t let this one thing stop you! You’re a great leader, and someone that I look up to. I wouldn’t be where I was at now without you! So please don’t doubt yourself, because we don’t, especially me! You’re my role model, Mr. Kunikida. Please, don’t ever forget that.”

After that, it was like a flip switched in him

“(Y/N), come here and walk very slowly.”

You did so with no hesitation, but you were curious

“Your shoe is untied. Here, let me tie it for you. It wouldn’t be ideal if you get injured because of a lousy shoelace. It wouldn’t be ideal if you got injured at all.”

“(Y/N), we have lunch scheduled at exactly 12:15. They’re also serving your favorite today, so we can’t be late, understand?”

“Yes sir!”, you said with a smile

“(Y/N), let’s go. It’s getting dark and if you still want to see that dreaded light show, we have to leave in 20 seconds to make it! I don’t want to see you sad or hear you complain if we miss it.”

“Coming sir! Just finishing up some work for tomorrow-“

“I already have it written in my notebook on when it will be done, so we can go.”

“Here you go Mr. Kunikida, I already typed up and printed out the reports for later on!”

“Thanks kid. And you don’t have to keep calling me Mister okay? Kunikida is fine.”

Dead silent in the office

KUNIKIDA is letting someone way younger than him just call him KUNIKIDA? Not MR.KUNIKIDA???

Everyone is, realistically, shook

But as time went on, they understood why

He came to look after you as his own

The entire ADA would have never thought the day would come (it wasn’t even in the notebook!) where he would care for a kid like his little sibling but here it was, right in front of their faces

But they weren’t complaining at all. You seemed to make his day a little brighter, and he wasn’t as uptight as much (but don’t be mistaken he was still Kunikida, just at an 8 instead of a whole 10)

After that mini pep talk that fateful day, he made it his duty to be a good role model for you. To always set a good example, both in and out the office.

He wouldn’t fail you, and he would be damned if he let anything happen to you

You’re a good kid, and you only deserve the best. And he was gonna be the best role model (and brother) for you

Dazai

Aw man, he was..conflicted to say the least

Listen, it’s not like he hates kids or teens, but it’s just extra responsibilities to watch over them. And he already slacks off enough to begin with, so is this really a good idea sticking a 14 year-old with him?

And lowkey, the way that he treated Akutagawa is still heavy on his mind, and he doesn’t want a repeat

But the President made it so, and Kunikida was ready to attack if he even thought about denying the order. Plus, it could be like another Atsushi around (another person to pass work off too) so that was a win!

And another person to annoy Kunikida too

You looked so pure and innocent. Are you sure that you’re in the right place? 

He genuinely thought you were a lost kid when you came up to him the first time lmao

Geez, you even sound sweet too! How has this world not damage or corrupt you yet?

“Hi Mr. Dazai! It’s nice to meet you. I hope that we can make a great team, and that I’m here to help if you need anything!”

“Nice to meet you too. And now that you mention it, these reports have been giving me a hard time...”

Not gonna lie, he did take advantage of your help. You offered, so why not? He thought you were gonna get sick of it soon and start complaining, but nope

You took his reports and did it with no hesitation every time. And you always handed it to him with a bright smile. On top of that, you always cleaned up his area and behind him, you did any leftover work that he ignored forgot to do so that he wouldn’t get yelled at, and tried to bring him small snacks and even packed a whole lunch for him when you noticed that he didn’t eat a lot

He even started to feel pretty bad and he was getting disapproving looks from his fellow detectives (even Kenji, and he never frowns)

So he started to take back and *GASP* actually do his work?!

But you stopped him, and told him that he should, “Take it easy! You work hard enough as it is saving the city. It’s no problem doing these reports, and I want to help you in any way I can, Mr. Dazai.”

“(Y/N), don’t worry, I can do them. And remember it’s just Dazai, calling me Mister makes me feel old like Kunikida-”

“I HEARD THAT!” 

And it seemed like you really cared for his wellbeing, especially when you had to accompany him on missions

Well, it just so happen that while you were going with Atsushi to find Dazai to start a mission, you both found him

Hanging upside down, sinking to the bottom of the lake

You rushed into the water immediately, pulling him out and onto the ground while Atsushi was just standing there in disbelief

Atsushi is so done with his shit

“Dazai, can you hear me?! Dazai?! Atsushi, I gotta give him CPR I don’t think he’s-”

“(Y/N) don’t worry he’s okay! This isn’t his first time he’s done this, and probably not the last.”

“W-what do you mean?”

Oh

Oh

You didn’t know about Dazai’s suicide methods? Did he not tell you or talk about it in front of you? Atsushi would have been somewhat proud of him if this whole situation didn’t happen, but here we are

“Geez, guess this method isn’t for me. It seems like someone is bound to always inter- hm, (Y/N)? What are doing out of the office? What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”

You hugged his chest tightly, not caring that he was practically soaked down to the bone

“Please stop, Dazai! Why are you doing this? Why are you trying to leave everyone?! Why are you trying to leave ME?!”

That got his attention

“Your life is important, Dazai, too important to try and end it on your own terms! You’re special to me, I look up to you. You’re smart, funny, and you help everyone out in your own special way. If you weren’t here anymore, everyone would be so lost...I would be so lost..,I-I-I wouldn’t know what to do-”

“(Y/N)-”

You looked up, eyes red and puffy with tears rolling down your cheeks, but filled with determination

“I promise you that I will make sure you know how much you matter to everyone. I swear on my life that I will.”

Okay, so you know how you were helpful/adorable before? On a scale of 1-10, you were definitely at an 11. But Dazai felt like you were at a 20

At first, he thought that you weren’t being genuine. You were just a young kid who didn’t know any better and was just trying to do your job, in sickeningly, oversweet way. I mean, who would really care about him with his horrid past? He was convinced that you were just naïve, and that the world would swallow you whole when it gets the chance. And it made him feel pity for you

But you proved him wrong

You weren’t just some ignorant child. You were in this agency working alongside him for a reason. And you reminded him of that everyday when he saw you working, handling the cases, taking actions on missions, all the while being kindhearted through and through 

You especially went out of way for him, and it was both a warm and scary feeling. People that he ended up caring for shared an undeserving fate, and he blamed himself for it constantly. So he tried to keep his distance, for your safety. You still had a life to live, and he didn’t want to ruin that for you.

But it was kinda hard to when you work together, and with you constantly being under his wing trying to show him the good in life and the difference that he made, he couldn’t help but admit it

You proved him wrong, and not a lot of people can say that. 

You went out of your way to make sure that everyone was okay, mentally and physically. He didn’t want to admit it, but you made the office (and his life) a little bit more bearable when you were around. You’re a good kid. And it was so fun to rope you and sometimes Atsushi into his schemes lmao y’all can be so gullible sometimes

Unfortunately, he still planned to leave this world, but he tried not to talk about it in front of or around you, and his number of attempts did dwindle, so that was a good thing

“Hey (Y/N), let’s grab something to eat, I would be a terrible person if I let my dear little baby assistant go hungry.”

“Dazai, if you’re hungry, you can just say that. I don’t mind finishing this later. It’s good to eat when you need to, and your health is #1 priority!”

He couldn’t take back his past and the way he abused Akutagawa, but he could certainly make sure that he doesn’t make the same mistakes

And that would start with being a decent role model for you. He won’t exactly be a “model citizen”, but he will always do the right thing. He’s turned over a new leaf by turning to the light, and while his methods aren’t always legal, he won’t stray from it again

And he won’t let you stray either

Ranpo

He was not a happy camper at all, let me tell you

Hello, do you know who he is?? He’s the greatest detective in the world! Why would the President think he need a sidekick?! He saw you working under him as an insult. Were they trying to say that he wasn’t good enough on his own?!

You weren’t exactly welcome with open arms, but that was okay! You were a complete stranger to him, but you were hoping that would change overtime

And Fukuzawa offered to praise him if he took you in so he stopped pouting momentarily

“Hi Mr. Ranpo! I’ve heard great things about you, and I hope that we can get along!”

“Well, of course you’ve heard great things about me, I’m the greatest detective in the world! It would be a crime if you didn’t hear about me.”

It was a rocky start between you guys to say the least. Not only was he lazy with the work he already had (I mean, it was too easy for him), but you were always willing to complete it (which you did, when you realized that maybe he was too tired or had other important things to worry about)

Who are you trying to fool, this man was just being lazy 

But you either didn’t realize it or you just purposely ignored it to get it done for the sake of the agency. Bless your pure heart for putting up with that poutyface 

Despite that, you handled everything with positivity and pride. When discussing cases (even though he would solve it in under a minute), you already had the reports ready to go, took notes for him, and you even tidied up his desk (which really consisted of his snack pile)

And you were starting to grow on him. You were like his mini cheerleader/#1 fan. His ego was going through the roof

On missions, it was a piece of cake for him, duh! With his ability, Super Deduction, it was always easy. And you were in the background, in awe with everything going on. He wanted to say he was surprised, but he would be lying. It would be a downright lie if you said you weren’t impressed with his ability and with him in general.

You repeatedly praised him, and he always gave you the same response: 

“World’s greatest detective, remember?”

The one thing that would cause him to see you in a new light, was when he got lost. You remembered Kunikida mentioning that he wasn’t the best at navigating the train system

He really said that Ranpo didn’t even know how to read the schedule, and that someone had to always walk with him to make sure he was going to the right places. 

He just wanted to go back to the office to his beloved snacks, when this happened. He wasn’t stupid by any means, but it was a waste to use his ability on something trivial as this-

“Mr. Ranpo! Wait for me!”

Just as he knew, you were running late meeting him

“Hey (Y/N) what took you so long?! My beloved snacks are calling for me back at the agency, and I need to answer-”

“Don’t worry, I packed you some!”

“Yeah, I already knew that since that’s the reason you’re late. And before you ask, you look out of breath, the receipt is still crumpled in your hand, and I see some crumbs from something you already ate on your clothes.”

Huh. Was it that obvious? You guess so...

Or maybe Ranpo really is the world’s greatest detective!

“I know, I know. I’m the best, no need to tell-”‘

“Mr. Ranpo, you deserve all the praise that you get. You’re someone I want to be like when I get older.”

“Hm?”, there you go praising him again, but you were crying

“I feel like people don’t take you seriously like they should, Just because you don't fight like the others doesn’t mean that you’re not a valuable asset to the group! And I wish people saw you like how I do! You’re my inspiration to do my best everyday. And I know that I can’t be the best detective, but I want to be as strong and intelligent and brave just like you so I can save people and be a motivating hero like you!”

He’s silent, and your words are sinking in. You’re wiping away your tears, the start of an apology on the tip of your tongue, when he suddenly put his hand on top of your head

He’s staring right at you, glasses on and green eyes open for you to see

“You’re already on your way there (Y/N). That I know. And I’m never wrong with my deductions, let alone when using my ability.”

The flood gates have OPENED 

You know that he doesn’t technically have an ability, but that doesn’t stop you from accepting his words and finding them as the truth. If Ranpo said it, he meant it. He was the world’s greatest detective, and you didn’t have any doubt in him

“Now let’s go, it’s going to start raining and I don’t want us to be hungry and drenched. Plus, Kunikida is totally freaking out and thinking that we’re both lost and in some criminal’s hideout right now.”

After that fateful day, the dynamic shifted between you two. Instead of you just doing the work, he pushed it off on someone else so he could explain to you about the different cases he had to solve, and other detective matters

Really he was just bragging and having you both slack off, but it didn’t matter you guys were still having fun

It even got to a point where he shared some snacks with you from his sacred snack pile

BOY WAS THAT THE TALK OF THE OFFICE 

All in all, while he knew that you couldn’t be the greatest detective (that was his title after all), he would help you get to your goal regardless. Not that you would need a lot of extra help, he was watching over you after all, and you already have a good head on your shoulders along with the heart of a hero

Every Sherlock needs a Watson, and he deducted that it wasn’t too bad having you by his side

[sortasirius]

“Inherit the Earth” and the Fakeout

Absolutely genius.  Amazing, iconic, legendary, something only our showrunner Andrew Dabb can pull off.

"But Lilly, the episode was so bad!  It was just the brothers, they didn’t look for Cas and Eileen!”

YES.  THAT IS EXACTLY THE POINT.  THIS WAS A FAKE ENDING, THE END OF THE SEASON, NOT OF THE SERIES.

Let’s get into it.

An empty world.  No one left but Sam, Dean, and Jack.

So Dean ran, he somehow managed to pick himself up off the floor of the dungeon and meet up with Sam and Jack.  That jacket was this silent reminder.  Remember what I’ve been saying, Cas has occupied the negative space all season, this is no exception.

Dean can’t look either of them in the face, he’s doing that thing, where his eyes move everywhere BUT where he should look. 

“I couldn’t save anybody.”

Sam couldn’t save the world and Dean couldn’t save the one person that means the world to him.

“Where’s Cas?”

“Dean?”

I think it’s there, in that pause where Dean tries to push down the emotions, continue the fight, not think about the memories he left in the bunker, that Jack realizes what must have happened. Jack is the only one that knows about the deal, he has to know what Cas not being there must mean.

“He saved me.  Billie was coming after us.  Cas summoned the Empty.  It took her...and took him.  Cas is gone.”

This may shock you, but I am GLAD they didn’t talk about Cas, especially with what happens at the end of the episode.  Cas is allowed to just take up unsaid space.  It’s obvious he’s missing with the way they blocked things, obvious he’s missing here.  This whole “oh well they don’t care about Cas because they didn’t talk about him”?  Malarkey.

“Jack I’m sorry.”

Guilt.  Regret.  Pain.  Dean will carry this with him for the rest of his life.  Not only that he lost Cas, but that Sam lost Cas, that Jack lost Cas.

That SHOT, with the distance between Jack and Sam where Cas is SUPPOSED TO BE, and then a zoom out to...THE WORLD.

Okay, as usual, Bucklemming has the subtlety of a sledgehammer lmao.

Jack crying???  Praying to Cas????  Bruh?????

Also it’s just straight-up frightening for everything around my boy to die he is my baby son.

Also not to point out the incredibly obvious, but Dean starts drinking immediately, and continues drinking throughout the whole episode.  Grief arc 2.0 babey.

“We can what, Dean?  There’s no one left to save!  Everybody’s gone!”

“You can’t just give up.”

“What other choice do we have!”

Idk why, but for Sam, who’s the constant, the one who’s always had hope, through everything, through all these years, when he finally says this, when he finally loses his hope?  It hits the hardest.  Sam is the leader, so not only is he grieving the loss of Eileen, he is a general grieving the loss of his soldiers, his friends, the world that he feels the duty to save.

When they go to meet Chuck, I just can’t get that image of Dean, leaning against the car, handprint still on his jacket, staring at the ground out of my head.  It takes him a few seconds to catch up to Sam, like he’s pulled out of thoughts like deep dark water.  Remember friends, it doesn’t have to be loud to be powerful.

Chuck wearing BLACK?  FEAR.

“That’s right, the whole Cain and Abel thing.  Us dead, whatever.  I’ll kill Sam, Sam’ll kill me, we’ll kill each other.  Okay, you pick.  But first?  You gotta put everything back the way it was.  The people, the birds...Cas.  You gotta bring him back.”

Willing to kill his brother.  Willing to die.  Tears in his eyes, begging God to bring Cas back.

And Chuck?  Chuck doesn’t care about their surrender, he knows he’s already got them beaten.  He cares about their pain, he cares about them suffering, because to him?  That’s the entertainment.  He’s not entertained by their found family, by their happiness, by their joy.  He wants them to suffer, all of them.

“Eternal shame.  Suffering.  And loneliness.”

And he leaves them with just that.  No hope, no family, just the three of them, broken, alone.  Jack locked in his bedroom, Sam trying desperately to make life “normal” again.  And Dean.  Dean who drank so much he passed out on the floor.

He doesn’t feel terrific, he feels like shit, because not only is he dealing with the shame of an empty planet, he’s dealing with the guilt of being back in the place where the Empty took Cas.

This whole thing with the dog was just absolutely heartwrenching shit and if I didn’t hate Chuck before, him snapping Miracle right in front of an already fragile Dean would seal that deal.

I just want everyone to know that this is a Jake Abel stan account.

“Daddy’s boy” is a big insult for my boy Dean to use considering his own past with his trash abusive father but I’ll allow it.

I do think it’s interesting, ending of his arc aside, that Michael is willing to help them now.  What changed?  Sure, he ended up trying to help Chuck, running back to his father, but why get back in the game?  I wonder if it has anything to do with the loss of Adam.  It’s an interesting parallel, a man loses his angel while an angel loses his human.

Everything is so DARK in the Bunker now too, even the lighting is loud.

When I tell you I lost my shit when I saw Cas was calling Dean, when I heard Misha’s voice??  I knew it didn’t make any sense but I didn’t care, I would’ve been one step behind Dean as he sprinted towards the door.

Fuck you, Eugenie.

I mean it’s torture not only to Dean, who looks beyond fucking crushed when it’s damn Lucifer at the door, but for us too.  Who the FUCK wanted Lucifer back?  And to tease Cas???  Garbage.

I mean...fam.  Listen, we know who’s writing this episode, this whole Betty thing is just like blatantly unnecessary but again, Eugenie loves Lucifer, gotta distract her with a shiny toy lmao.

It was cool to see Michael and Lucifer onscreen together.  It was a cool dynamic that we rarely got to see.

The whole episode is just twist after twist.  Listen, it’s their last episode so I guess they needed to fit in a season worth of twists in one episode.

Bye Lucifer.  We know Eugenie can’t bring him back.  Blessings to all.

This scene with Adam is the FOURTH scene where Dean is drinking...big yikes to my guy’s liver.

Here’s the thing about Michael.  He’s a mirror for Dean in season 5.  Loyal to an absent father.  He has never changed, but Dean has.  Dean is able to acknowledge now, the trauma that his father put him through, he was able to move past the need for pleasing him at any cost.  Michael and Chuck?  Are John and Dean, if Dean had never been allowed to grow.  And Chuck proves, like John did, that he would always put his wants (in John’s case “the mission”) over his children.

Also not to beat a dead horse but Michael’s death was also peak Eugenie.

Sam getting to punch Chuck in the face?  Thank you, he deserves that.

Obviously I don’t love any scene of my boys getting brutally beaten.  But what I love, what I will always love about them, is what Chuck hates about them:  they won’t ever give up.  They know they won’t win against him, they don’t even land any hits, but that’s not what matters.  What matters is their controller doesn’t control them anymore, that they really are free.  No matter how hard they get hit, the get back up.  It is their choice to stand up to him, no matter the cost.

The moment where Sam and Dean are supporting each other, covered in blood, and they look God in the face, and they laugh.  That is why I will love them unconditionally for the rest of my life.  That is who they are, they will never cow to the villain, whether that’s Azazel or Alastair or Zachariah or Lucifer or Amara or Death or Metatron or Cain or God.  They will always choose to stand up.

“Why are you smiling?”

“Because.  You lose.”

Chills.  What a line.

And Chuck is left, small, human, no longer a villain, no longer anything.

Gotta be real, woulda been nice to, idk, not see all this essential plot in a flashback, but I know I can only ask so much of Bucklemming.

For Dean to walk away from killing Chuck, right after he’s called him “the ultimate killer” is quite simply the most beautifully heartwrenching thing I could ever ask for.  Because that’s who Dean was under Chuck, that’s who Chuck wanted him to be.

And he would have before:

But he’s heard some things since then, heard some things about how others see him.  Not as the killer, not as a monster, not as angry and broken or his daddy’s blunt instrument:

I’m not saying that Dean doesn’t kill Chuck for Cas.  He doesn’t kill Chuck because he doesn’t think he has to anymore, he doesn’t kill Chuck because he listened to Cas, he took Cas’ words to heart.  He made the choice not to be the killer.

“See that’s not who I am, that’s not who we are.”

And Chuck is angry, because he thought, after everything, even after losing, that he would still know Dean well enough to know that he would kill him.  But Chuck has never really known Dean, he has never understood where he’s really come from.  Cas understood, Sam and Jack understand, but Chuck never did, and writing off Dean as angry and broken is his biggest mistake, because that’s never been Dean.

“It’s not his power anymore.”

And it’s not just his physical power, it’s his power over the story, over the boys that’s the real power taken from him.

For Jack to be the one to bring everyone back, for him to be the hero of the story?  That’s poetic right there.  Now, I will say, I don’t think this story ends with him as God, because for him, the child, to take on this burden, it doesn’t make a ton of sense to me for his arc, but we shall see next week.  It felt pretty tied up, but there’s one major loose end: and that’s Jack seeing Cas again.

“Just you and me, going wherever the story takes us.  Just us.”

“Finally free.”

This doesn’t feel triumphant to me, it doesn’t feel like relief.  It feels like they’ve settled, like this is the best they’re going to get, so they might as well make the best of it, at least they have each other.

For Cas and Jack to be carved into the table?  I cry.

And for the montage, very similar to “Swan Song” to be set to “Runnin on Empty”?  Sorry but that’s just too sus to be ignored.

They packaged this episode as an ending, because for many, it might be.  The season’s story, the season about fighting Chuck is over.  So, you might be asking (or, well, screaming, judging by my replies lol), what’s left?  And that’s a good question, Chuck has been defeated, so what is left?  What’s left is what’s really mattered all season: the relationships that have been crafted over the years.  Dean and Sam’s unhappiness at the end of the episode, where “just you and me” sounded more of a grudging acceptance than anything else, is one of the clues that has to be looked at.  Why didn’t Sam find Eileen, why didn’t Jack bring back Cas?  Those two characters specifically are the ones we need to watch out for.  As I’ve said over and over again, peace, contentment, satisfaction, those don’t come from Sam and Dean on the open road together anymore.  They have a family, more of a family than they did when they started hunting together all those years ago, and that family is what holds them together.  They need each other, of course, but each other isn’t enough anymore.  Sam needs Eileen, Dean needs Cas.  That is where they will find their peace.

This episode, as many written by Bucklemming was sloppy, rushed, packed full of shit, and had little gems that we can talk about forever, but that was the end of the season, and next week?  Andrew Dabb brings us home, where Dean and Sam will finally be able to choose what they want for themselves, and that, my friends, is Eileen and Cas.

[chojiakimichi]

So I’ve been thinking, Pokémon but like Naruto: 

Clans specialize with certain types of Pokémon because instead of kekkei genkai they do that.  The Uchiha mainly capture and train Fire types, the Nara deal with Dark type Pokémon though they do still care for the Stantler pack that lives in the woods that surround the village, while the Yamanaka train Psychic type Pokémon and so on. 

Which means the Inuzuka are the odd men out because while yeah there are dog Pokémon, for the most part their ninkin are dog-like Pokémon. I like to think that Akamaru is a Furfrou. 

The Hokage is the very best. Top Trainer. Each Hidden Village has a gym and to be a Kage you have to defeat every gym.

The Akatsuki is like Team Rocket, only instead of wanting the Pokémon to sell or eat— whatever the Italian dude that runs Team Rocket wants them for —The Akatsuki wants all Pokémon to be free. Think Eco-terrorism.

Now on to the fun part, the Konoha 12:

Like I said before, I think it would be funny if Akamaru was a Furfour.

Yeah okay Naruto gets a Vulpex that keeps nearly setting him on fire until they have an Ash-Pikachu style understanding, but he also has a Croagunk that likes to eat ramen with him and constantly gets itself (and himself) into trouble. Naruto and the Croagunk meet in the woods while Naruto is on his two year journey with Jiraiya., 

Sakura starts off with a Roselia because they’re pretty and she’s twelve and girly and more into pageants only to then discover her love for fighting and capture a Hitmonchan and Snubbull.

Sasuke’s family— clan —dies before he gets Growlithe, the usual starter Pokémon for Uchiha’s. His first Pokémon is a Salazzel, a fire and poison type. It’s through Salazzel Sasuke finds he likes working with poison types more then fire and is what causes him to capture an Ekans when he’s with Orochimaru.

Shikamaru (my love) I’m stuck on. Like I see his first Pokémon being wither a Nuzleaf or a Larviatar, both of those Pokémon would fall asleep with him, on his chest as they don’t train.

Ino’s starter is a Ralts she dresses up. Pokémon!Ino knits sweaters and hats for her Pokémon so they can keep stylish. 

Choji’s first Pokémon is a Pancham and here’s why, Panchams can use Iron Fist which  “Strengthens punch-based moves to 1.2× their power” which just makes me think of the Sasuke retrieval arc and Choji’s fight against Jirobo.

Shino starts with a Weedle but like, he also has a pocket full of Wurmple and a Spinarak on his shoulder.

Hinata! Has! An Eevee! So everyone expected Hinata to choose a strong Psychic type Pokémon like other Hyuga’s only for her to chose and Eevee and Hinata can’t explain why she chose that Eevee just that when their eyes met they understood one another. And for the longest time Hinata refuses to evolve her Eevee. Only one day she just walks out into the village holding an Espeon and refuses to explain shit. 

Neji has a Meditite. 

Lee has Tyrouge that only has one arm. I feel like since he can’t use jutsu’s in the show his Pokémon should be handicapped as well only to then be one of the strangest fighting type Pokémon to make an appearance in the Hidden Leaf village.

Tenten has metal style Pokémon, like that’s her thing and her first Pokémon was a Mawile. 

[gffa]

To answer this (and, as always, if anyone disagrees, that’s fine! when i speak with a strong meta voice that isn’t the same as getting mad if people see things differently!), I think it first helps to establish what the Force is, how it works, and what the light and the dark are, which is covered more thoroughly here, but basically:  balance is not an in between of light and dark, but instead that the light is the balance.  That we all have darkness within us and we must work to train ourselves away from it, to face it and let it go.  That is the Force according to Star Wars’ worldbuilding. This isn’t Jedi teachings (though, that is what they teach) but that George Lucas directly says, “Only way to overcome the dark side is through discipline.“  The characters are absolutely meant to overcome it, to be brought face to face with it and defeat it.  Not to never have it, not to never deal with it, but to choose the light again and again. This is why the Jedi younglings are taken to Ilum and shown their fears in the caves, this is why the Jedi Temple on Lothal shows Kanan and Ahsoka their fears, this is why Yoda talks to Ezra about the anger and fear he has in him and Ezra is willing to admit it and work on it, when Yoda says, oh, you might be a Jedi yet, this is why Yoda has to wrestle with and defeat his dark side in the immortal arc, this is why the Jedi teach their younglings in the creche that the dark side is part of them,  “[Qui-Gon] knew [the dark side] was a thing all beings carried within them, a part of himself he would learn to guard against—the crèche masters had taught him all that.“ I argue that even Mortis, which on the surface looks like “equal light and equal dark is balance” is more about trying to get Anakin to face the darkness within himself and defeat it, that the dark side will always be there, but he has to learn to acknowledge it before he can overcome it. So, having Anakin be the in between of the light and the dark is not balance.  I mean, that’s the role Bendu has in Rebels (immortal beings are not vulnerable to the same consequences of the dark side that mortals are--the story group has reiterated that mortals cannot use the dark side without consequence) and Bendu doesn’t bring balance, he sits on the sidelines and does nothing.  His last appearance is Kanan yelling at him that he’s doing jack all to help the galaxy, that he’s a coward for not actually doing anything.  The middle of the light and the dark has a role in the galaxy, but it’s not the balance or to the health of the galaxy in the way the light is. Further, we don’t really know much about the Guardians of the Whills.  In the canon, Qui-Gon learns about immortality from the Force Priestesses who do not appear to be the same thing as the Guardians of the Whills, we see Yoda’s journey with them which brings it back to--face the darkness within, overcome it, and then you can start on the path to immortality. So, what do we know about that path?  It requires overcoming the darkness within you, but it also requires (and word of god supports this, about how Anakin’s final moments were about selflessness) absolute selflessness, you have to be able to reach a place of caring completely about others--which is precisely what the ultimate light side is: “The core of the Force–I mean, you got the dark side, the light side, one is selfless, one is selfish, and you wanna keep them in balance. What happens when you go to the dark side is it goes out of balance and you get really selfish and you forget about everybody … because when you get selfish you get stuff, or you want stuff, and when you want stuff and you get stuff then you are afraid somebody is going to take it away from you, whether it’s a person or a thing or a particular pleasure or experience. [….]    “Only way to overcome the dark side is through discipline. The dark side is pleasure, biological and temporary and easy to achieve. The light side is joy, everlasting and difficult to achieve. A great challenge. Must overcome laziness, give up quick pleasures, and overcome fear which leads to hate.”  --George Lucas, The Clone Wars writers meeting “Not by the cave you were but by your mind. Lessons, you have learned. Find courage, you did. Hope, patience Trust, confidence, and selflessness.” --Yoda, “The Gathering” “The Jedi choose the light for all that it reveals.” --Jedi texts, Poe Dameron comics Ultimately, I think the Jedi were probably the best place for Anakin, their philosophies on the Force match him very well with George Lucas’ explanations of how the Force work, their teachings echo his beliefs on happiness vs joy, his beliefs on the best way to teach (and GL believes that education is THE most important issue, compared to how the Jedi are fundamentally teachers at their core, etc.) and because they weren’t just the most famous users of the Force, but they tended to be the strongest. We don’t really even know much about the Temple of Kyber, if the people there are Force-sensitive (I know, I hate it, too, but canon says Chirrut wasn’t Force-sensitive) and the Church of the Force definitely seemed to not be Force-Sensitive, if Lor San Tekka is anything to go by. Which is important because there is a very, very key difference between strong Force-sensitives and lower level Force-sensitives/non-Force-sensitives:  The Force literally works based on the emotion and mindset you put into it.  What you put into it is what you get back out of it. The Force is an echo chamber, it’s a sponge that absorbs all of that, it holds onto those feelings you’re pouring out of you when you use the Force with it, so if you’re a high level Force-sensitive and you’re pouring out anger into the Force, into your kyber crystal, into the very walls around you, as Kanan tells Sabine in Rebels, their thoughts and actions become part of the blade, then that is staying with you, it’s always whispering in your ear, it’s dragging you down into the dark side. For someone like Anakin, who has this connection to the Force that’s stronger than probably any Guardian could possibly understand, he would be hearing those whispers as increasingly loud shouts just because of the nature of the Force and his incredible connection to it.  He would have had an even harder time not being dragged down into the dark, he would have had a harder time overcoming it, if the teachings he received weren’t about letting all of that go as best he can, if he wasn’t being trained to overcome the dark. The whole way Force-sensitivity works is that it’s based on your mental health and that you have to get past the darkness within you to embrace being selfless, to embrace loving other people rather than your own desires and fears and possessiveness, and the stronger you are in the Force, the more that’s going to be screaming inside your head and you have to work even harder to choose the light because you’re going to hear everything so loudly.  And the Jedi understood that, but, as GL said, “[everything changes], which is a basic Jedi philosophy that he isn’t willing to accept emotionally”. Anakin’s problem isn’t the light isn’t enough, it’s that he didn’t want to accept that things change, he didn’t want to accept when he needed to be able to let go, rather than burning the galaxy down because of his own fears and desire to hold onto something even when it was time to let go. The Jedi were the best place for someone like Anakin, even GL says, “If he’d have been taken in his first year and started to study to be a Jedi, he wouldn’t have this particular connection as strong as it is and he’d have been trained to love people but not to become attached to them. “ --George Lucas, Attack of the Clones commentary which says that the Jedi methods are actually pretty in line with How The Force Works.

[babybluebex]

can I please request a sebastian stan imagine where sebastian and the reader are both dating other people but they end up liking each other after filming something together, and the rest is up to you? xx

distance [sebastian stan x reader]

➽ pairing: sebastian stan x fem!reader (y/n) ➽ word count: 1.9k ➽ summary: see above!  ➽ warnings: explicit language, mentions of tom hiddleston x reader, angst, pining ➽ a/n: enjoy!

Jealousy was new to you. Sure, you turned green every so often, but it wasn’t a usual occurrence. It happened infrequently enough that you forgot the way it felt every time it bubbled up again. Recently, though, you were familiar with jealousy. 

You weren’t quite sure when it started. Maybe when you first met Sebastian. It was at the premiere for Avengers. You had been in it, playing Tony Stark’s daughter Lucy, who was kidnapped by the crazed Loki. In filming your scenes with Tom Hiddleston, you had grown to appreciate him, and the premiere was a sort-of announcement that you were dating. By that point, you already knew that you would be in the next Captain America movie, and you were thrilled to work with Chris and Scarlet again. On top of that, you were excited to meet Anthony Mackie. 

You didn’t know that Sebastian would be in Winter Soldier until he approached you at the premiere. He looked handsome, suit and rings and slicked hair, and he congratulated you on an amazing performance. “Oh, I loved you in First Avenger,” you told him with a smile. “Bucky was my favorite by far. I cried when he died.” 

Tom wrapped his arm around your waist and nodded in agreement. “She was truly a mess,” he said. “We had to pause the movie.” He shook Sebastian’s hand, and the force of it wasn’t lost on you. 

“I got emotional during your scene together in the Tower,” Sebastian said. “Lucy begging for her dad, and Loki’s unrelenting cruelty. I just… Wow. It blew me away!” 

“Thanks,” you said. “Are you gonna visit the Winter Soldier set?”

Sebastian laughed and bit his bottom lip. Full and pink. He was so totally handsome, and you felt lightheaded even being in his presence. “Well,” he started. “I’m actually in it.” 

You gasped. “What? How? Bucky died!” 

“He was rescued,” Sebastian said slowly. “By HYDRA. And he comes back.”

“Oh, my God,” you laughed. “Oh, you just made my entire night. Wow! I-I can’t wait!” 

Sebastian nodded, and he looked to his side. A few meters away, a woman was talking to the press, and she quickly came and kissed Sebastian on the cheek. You recognized her as one of his co-stars from Once Upon A Time, and you felt that unfamiliar jealousy bubble in your stomach. Why were you jealous? You were on the arm of one of the most talented and successful actors, and, besides that, you loved your boyfriend. 

So why did you want more? 

Filming for Winter Soldier started, and you quickly found out your character’s storyline. She was working with Steve and Fury to help in reparations of the New York fiasco from Avengers, and she was the first one to encounter the Winter Soldier. She wouldn’t recognize him and would tell Steve about her encounter with a super-soldier, and Natasha would tell the story of the Winter Soldier, how he was a myth and a ghost. The directors, the talented Russo brothers, had told you that an arc would extend past the movie and into the sequels where Lucy helps break Bucky Barnes from his brainwashing and they would eventually fall in love. But, they assured you, that was several films off. They didn’t even plan for Lucy and Bucky to kiss until the next Captain America movie. 

You and Sebastian became quick friends. Despite the metal-like prosthetic and long hair and heavy makeup that he wore on set, you found comfort in him. You couldn’t explain it, but you felt at ease with him. Between takes, you could be found laughing and jokingly sparing with him. 

One night, after filming, you called Tom. He was on a press tour for Dark World at the same time, which meant that your schedules never lined up. That night was the first time you had properly talked to him in weeks. “Hi, love,” you said. “How’re you? I miss you like crazy.” 

“I miss you too, darling,” Tom told you in his smooth baritone. “I’m alright. Tired as hell, though.” 

“I’m sorry,” you said softly. “Anything I can do to help?” 

“Just talk to me,” Tom sighed, and you imagined him leaning his head back. “Tell me about filming.” 

“Well,” you began. “A lot more physical than what I’m used to. A lot of running around and everything, ya know? My legs are sore all the time.” You laughed, and you listened to Tom’s scratchy laughter. “But I’m surrounded by great people. The Russos are awesome, and of course, Chris and Scarlet and Samuel are fantastic.”

“And Sebastian?”

You hesitated to talk about Sebastian. You hoped that your boyfriend hadn’t caught onto your infatuation with him, but that’s all it was. It was just a crush on a hot guy. “He’s cool,” you said. “Really funny and friendly. Most of my physical scenes are with him.” 

“I know you can’t tell me much,” Tom said. “But do you get to snog him?” 

You laughed, but bit your cheek all the same. “Not yet,” you chuckled. “That’s not until the next Captain America movie.”

“Oh,” Tom said quickly. “I was joking, but… Do you and Sebastian have any scenes like that?” 

“Not in this movie, love,” you assured him. “Are you jealous?” 

“Just a bit,” Tom admitted. “I just wish that it was me that you were kissing.” 

You sighed. “That’s the nature of our jobs, huh?” you said. “I wish I was kissing you too.” 

Tom was quiet for a moment, then he mumbled, “I think maybe we should take a break.” 

You wanted to be shocked, but you knew that it was coming. It was several months in the making and, with nothing concrete keeping you two together, it was inevitable. You weren’t hurt at all. “Me too,” you said softly. “We just… I can’t do long distance. It sounds cliche, but it’s not you, Hidds.”

“Distance is supposed to make the heart grow fonder,” Tom sighed. “But…” 

You nodded. “I understand,” you said. “But please, if you ever need someone to talk to, don’t hesitate to call me. Alright? I still care about you loads.” 

“Same to you, darling,” Tom whispered. And the call ended. 

The next day was weird, to put it plainly. You felt ill all morning and you couldn’t figure out exactly why, but, the moment you saw Sebastian, you understood it. Your boyfriend’s jealousy was powerful. As much as Tom wanted to blame it on something else, you knew that it was the green monster that had prompted the break up. “Hey,” Sebastian said cheerfully, placing a playful jab to your arm. “You seem tired.” 

“Gee, what a nice thing to say to a lady,” you chuckled. “No, I’m just…” You sighed. “Tom and I broke up last night. I’m a little weird today.” 

Sebastian’s face soured. “Shit, I’m sorry,” he said. “You guys seemed so happy together.” 

You shrugged. “We were,” you said. “‘Distance is supposed to make the heart grow fonder’... But I guess it doesn’t.” 

Sebastian frowned deep, and you pulled you into a tight hug. “I’m really fucking sorry,” he whispered. “Is there anything I can do?” 

“No,” you said, pulling out of his strong grip. Even without the actual metal arm, he was strong as hell. “Just a hug is enough.” 

“I’m glad I can do that,” Sebastian said. His eyes sparkled, and he added, “I understand what you’re going through. Jennifer and I broke up a few weeks before filming started.” 

“Oh my God!” you exclaimed. “Seb! I had no idea! I’m so sorry.” 

Sebastian shrugged. “It was for the best,” he said. The hug had yet to break, but you didn’t mind. Even through the layers of his costume, you could feel Sebastian’s heartbeat on your cheek, and it was soothing. 

Filming finished several weeks after your breakup with Tom, and then it was time for your own press tour. Marvel paired you with Scarlet for most press junkets, but sometimes you were put with Sebastian. Those days were your favorite, mostly because absolutely no work got done. You two were forever laughing and making fun of each other, and you always saw edits of your interviews on social media. 

Finally, the premiere came. You and Sebastian had already agreed to be each other’s dates, but you were blown away by him. His hair was short and styled, and he looked breathtakingly handsome in his expensive black suit and matching black tie. “Oh my fucking God,” Sebastian laughed when he saw you, though. “You look… Holy shit. So beautiful.” 

“Oh, God, stop,” you groaned. Your dress was a beautiful thing, custom Dior, red silk that hugged your body just right, and you shivered when Sebastian’s warm fingers trailed down your exposed back. “You look even better.” 

“Well, that’s not possible,” Sebastian scoffed. “You’re gonna steal the show.” 

“When I’m next to you?” You asked. “Everyone’s gonna be focused on your pretty blue eyes.” 

Sebastian smiled softly, his hand finally settling on the small of your back. “I have something for you,” he said gently. 

“Oh, Seb!” you groaned. “You did not buy me something. You know I hate that!” 

“Aw, c’mon, you’re gonna love it,” Sebastian said, and he reached into a pocket inside his suit jacket. He pulled out a small box, just big enough for a pair of earrings or something equivalent, and he opened it. You gasped. A ring. Silver metal, two diamonds with a ruby nestled in the middle. It was dainty and gorgeous, and you felt tears pricking at your eyes. 

“You piece of shit,” you sniffled. “I just had my makeup done and now you’re ruining it!” You hugged him all the same, though, and you whispered in his ear, “It’s so gorgeous, Seb. Thank you.” 

When you pulled out of the hug, you looked at Sebastian, admiring him. He was truly a gorgeous man, and you felt your chest grow hot at the look in his eyes. Were his pupils blown from love? Lust? Something else entirely? 

He answered the question. Sebastian placed his hand on your cheek and tugged you into a kiss, the hand on your back pulling you in against his body, and you held onto the back of his neck. He was everything you thought he would be: his lips were soft and tasted so nice, like cinnamon and whisky and all things wonderful, and, when the kiss broke, he rested his forehead against yours. “I…” he started. “I’m sorry, Y/N, that was-- I shouldn’t have--“ 

“Stop,” you whispered firmly. You knew that Sebastian, the man you were able to call your best friend, was prone to anxiety, and you didn’t want a single anxious thought about you to cross his mind. “Don’t apologize. If you hadn’t kissed me, I would have kissed you. Thank you.” 

You saw Sebastian’s hands shaking as he slid the ring onto your middle finger, and you smiled at how perfectly it fit. “Bucky,” you whispered, admiring the ring. “Silver and red… Right?” 

“Glad you caught that,” Sebastian chuckled. “Look, I know that I’m just your date, but I just really like you. I feel stupid because I’m so nervous about it, but… Seeing you upset over Tom just made me feel so horrible. I never want to see you like that again, and if I can help to make your days better, then I want to. Can I?” 

You touched your hand to his cheek, and you nodded. “Of course,” you told him. “I’d love nothing more, Seb.”