#and if I missed your tag pls reach out and tell me - I'm trying to keep up but my brain is a cluttered place to be in

[harmonictechnicality]

Memory Log: Day 52

part 1 here | part 2 here | part 3 here | part 5 here | part 6 here (ao3 link here)

After seeing his ink-smeared biography all over Eddie Munson’s arm, Steve becomes extremely motivated. Obsessed, even.

He assembles a makeshift army. Eddie’s Memory Soldiers, he calls it. Okay - he doesn’t call it that out loud, only to himself (because even Steve is self-aware enough to know how deranged this all sounds).

Steve compiles a ragtag group of Eddie’s friends to nudge his brain along faster. Band mates, theater dweebs, potheads that can carry a tune. All of them bring mixtapes on their visits. After two weekends, there’s already a fuckload of thrashy melodies for Eddie to choose from.

He lets them take the reins on this music-healing plan because there’s no fucking way Steve will be helpful in that department. It means less visits that include his presence, which sort of sucks, but it’s worth it. Worth it to get Eddie back to where he used to be.

Before Steve heads out for one of his morning visits, Robin interrogates him. Asks him the question he’s been ignoring for weeks.

“Steve… not to sound harsh, but why do you care so much?” 

Yeah. Why does he care so much? 

She quickly follows it up with, “I just didn’t know you two were friends now. So I’m just curious, I guess.”

They’re not friends. They’re lukewarm tolerators - tethered together by monster hunting and Dustin Henderson.

They’ve flirted, sure. But who doesn’t? Steve would flirt with half of the leggy cartoon characters that appear on Saturday Mornings if he could. So that’s a weak argument to assume they’re more than just friends. Tolerators. Whatever.

So he lies. To Robin. To himself. Lies so much that it sits in his stomach like motion sickness.

He answers the exact same way he’s been answering since day one:

“I’m just doing this for the kids, Robs.”

He’s pretty sure neither of them are buying that statement. He tries again. Stamps the words onto his confused brain. Considers writing them on his arm just like Eddie might do.

“I’m doing it for them.”

Eddie is always on his Walkman (Steve’s Walkman) now that he has skyscraper of cassettes on his desk. Pretty much every time Steve returns, Eddie is head banging. Won’t stop until the nurses scold him.

Or Steve. He’ll stop if Steve scolds him too.

“You can’t keep jostling up your brain, Munson.” Steve whips the headphones off of Eddie’s ears. “Gonna undo all of our hard work.”

“Our hard work?” Eddie attempts to grab the headphones back. Gives up as soon as their hands make contact. “And who might be included in this our that you speak of?”

“You know…” Me. “The doctors and nurses and your friends.”

“Right.”

This is how things have been going lately. Eddie teases him mercilessly and Steve bats it all away. Doesn’t encourage it for a second.

Which blows so hard because he wants to flirt back. Steve wants to know what Eddie feels like beyond tubes and bandages and hospital gowns. He wants way too much after watching Eddie fall asleep smiling that night. After finding out that Eddie scams his own mind into remembering Steve in technicolor details every day.

But it feels wrong. Deep down, there’s this part of Steve that worries that Eddie only likes the scribbled notes, the good qualities of himself. The non-prickster qualities.

He doesn’t scribble the bad qualities on his arm. Eddie lets himself forget about those every night. 

So it seems wrong. Unfair to let Eddie only remember the good parts of him and take advantage of his weak mind.

Life was a fucking breeze before Steve cared about not taking advantage of people. Shit, he used the world’s biggest advantage-taker before all of this evil wizard nonsense.

“Quiz me, Harrington.” Eddie insists.

So Steve does. Steve goes down the list of questions. Things that Eddie’s memory typically hesitates to recognize. 

Music helps Eddie remember his childhood memories the best.

That’s the biggest discovery they’ve made over the last fourteen days. Tapes that include songs from the early to mid 70’s have the biggest mental impact on his memory skills. Every day, he recalls more moments from his past.

Winter birthday parties. Recess and tire swings. Nineteen chickenpox. A pet hamster named Sterling.

“Can’t believe Wayne trusted you with a living creature.” Steve sneers.

“Never said he did.”

He always gets fuzzy with stuff from the late 70s though. And the early 80s is just a jumbled-up shit show. That’s when Eddie really starts failing his quiz.

“What year did you get the tattoo on your chest?”

“You mean this one?” Eddie pulls down the wrinkly hospital gown, exposing way too much of his collarbone. “Or this one?” He pulls the fabric down even further.

They must’ve finally turned the heat on in this place. Or maybe Steve’s sweater is just extra itchy, scratching his skin all splotchy red. He rubs furiously at the collar, spreads the flush all over by accident. 

His eyes dart up to the fluorescent lights. Away from Eddie’s chest. “Um… the… creepy guy.”

“You’ll sprain your neck looking up like that.”

“Good thing I’m in a hospital then.”

“Okay - seriously, what’s up with you?”

“Nothing.”

“Sure.” Eddie snorts. His heart monitor beeps faster. Steve hates that laughing must be a bit painful for him. “And he’s not some creepy guy. He’s a creepy demon. Please respect the body art and get your facts right.”

“Fine.”

Not flirting back makes Steve feel like he could break out into hives. He has a fucking stockpile of pickup lines. He hoards provocative catchphrases like a horny pack rat. Talking is becoming increasingly difficult when he can’t banter back the way he wants to.

“Don’t remember what year I got it.” Eddie admits. “Sorry.”

Steve pulls his focus away from the ceiling and scribbles that down:

Eddie still can’t remember when he got his tattoos.

“Gee mister,” Eddie imitates a very masculine Shirley Temple voice. “Am I failing the pop quiz already?”

Eddie remembers who Shirley Temple is (weird, but okay).

Eddie does a really shitty impression of Shirley Temple.

Steve just keeps writing. Not even writing words anymore, just moving the pen to stay focused. Stay distracted from flirting.

The energy starts to feel swampy and stiff as he continues to give short responses with lifeless enthusiasm. Steve can tell that Eddie is picking up on the weirdness too. 

He’s so fidgety. Drumming his fingers, twisting the one ring he’s allowed to wear on one of his less busted fingers. Bobbing his knees and kicking off his blankets. 

Eventually, Eddie puts his (Steve’s) headphones back on and closes his eyes. A nonverbal surrender. A borrowed Walkman instead of a white flag. Why does it feel so shitty to see that he is just as defeated as Steve?

Once Eddie is asleep, Steve peaks over at his arms.

The notes are still there. Fading, but there.

It shouldn’t jab him in the heart the way that it does every time he checks, but christ. It’s so fucked up.

Slowly but surely, Eddie is gaining pieces of his past, but never his present. Why the fuck is that? Steve is so selfishly pissed about that because he’s a main role in Eddie’s present life. 

He’s the one that’s here most days. He’s the one that listens to Eddie’s rants and incessant complaints. He’s the one that calls the nurses when Eddie is too prideful to admit when he’s in pain.

Steve should be remembered without smudgey reminders and foggy recollections.

Steve should be un-fucking-forgettable.

After an unhealthy amount of moping, he comes up with an idea. Well, Dustin comes up with an idea, actually. Steve bribed him with nougat and R-rated movie rentals to construct a gameplan.

“And you need Eddie to remember your favorite sweater…why?” Dustin’s mouth is full of chewy candy as he asks.

Steve chucks a raisinette at his dumb hat. “I thought we agreed this was a no questions asked request.”

“You suggested that.” Dustin points at Steve. “I never agreed to it though.”

This is the part Steve despises. If he admits it to others, he has to admit it to himself. And while he’s come a long way since that first day with Eddie, he’s not there yet. His pride can only take so much vulnerability before it fractures completely. “Just… I’m testing a theory I have on his newest memories.”

“Right. And what theory would that be?”

That he thinks about me in kissable ways. “That he remembers more than he gives himself credit for.”

Dustin chugs back his soda and scrunches the can in his grasp. “Okay. Well, the mixtape theory is working decently well with older memories, right?

“Yeah. Definitely.”

“So maybe it can work with newer memories too.”

Steve is lost already. “Meaning?”

“Find songs that relate to you.” Dustin shrugs like duh. He must sense Steve’s hesitation, so he sputters back into his brainy explanation. “Think about it: you’re there all the time -”

“Not all the time, but -”

“Shut the hell up. You’re there all the time, so he must remember the essence of Steve Harrington.”

Steve fake gags. “Don’t say essence, that’s fucking gross.”

“Will you stop interrupting? Jesus christ.” Dustin yells, scrunching the soda can even more with his irritation. “Just make a mixtape with stuff that relates to you. Get his current memories to stick with lyrics and shit.”

Steve twists his mouth to one side. Then the other. “That’s…”

“Genius?”

“I was gonna say worth a shot, but sure.” Steve agrees. “We’ll go with your conceited analysis.”

Dustin finally picks up the raisinette from earlier. Throws it back at Steve. “You should be nicer to me. I possibly just solved your dilemma.”

“I should be nicer to you?” Steve tosses the raisinette into his mouth, despite its questionable duration on the floor. “Dude, you’re never nice to me.”

“Yeah, but it’s affectionate hostility.”

“And that makes it better?”

“Basically, yeah.”

“Fine.” Steve rolls eyes, offers a hand to Dustin. “Thank you for the hostile affection.”

Dustin accepts the handshake. He’s overly smug about it too. “You’re very welcome.”

Memory Log: Day 53

Right away, Steve determines it’s a Kathy Day. Eddie is a verbal nightmare already, whining about the dead batteries in his tv remote.

“I’ll get Sam to grab some batteries when her shift starts.” Steve reassures the bitchy entity possessing Eddie Munson’s body at the moment.

“Why don’t you just get the damn batteries?” Eddie bites back. “You have legs, don’t you?”

“You have eyes, don’t you? Of course, I have fucking legs.” Steve can play it this game. Doesn’t want to but he can be just as obnoxious if Eddie keeps going with his attitude. “Please don’t pull this Kathy shit today.”

That simultaneously shuts them both up for a while. Steve begins flipping through one of the outdated magazines on Eddie’s desk, avoiding the escalated atmosphere. At this rate, there’s no fucking way Steve is going to bring up his mixtape. Kathy/Eddie will probably smash it. Roll over it with the wheels on his imprisoning hospital bed.

Eddie clears his throat, speaking softer than he did at Steve’s arrival. “You know… you were sort of a Kathy yourself yesterday.”

Eddie remembers Steve’s weird mood from the day before (needs to check Eddie’s arm notes to make sure he didn’t write that down).

“Yeah well… I’m allowed to be the pissy one sometimes.” Steve doesn’t look up. He just keeps pretending to read the fossilized magazine in his hand.

“Whatever you say, Harrington.” There’s another pause. Just as awkward as the last one. Their dynamics today are clashing harder than their music styles. Eddie breaks through the awkwardness once again. “So… what’s on the brain agenda today?”

Eddie remembers their pop quizzes.

Right. The quiz. The quiz that Steve has no intention of administering today because he’s supposed to give Eddie this stupid mixtape. 

And look, Steve is pretty good at avoiding shit - homework and phone calls and extended family members. He’s good at dodging shit too, like the relentless one-night stands that can never seem to take a goddamn hint.

But this situation is different because Steve would clearly like to avoid the potential weirdness of giving Eddie Munson a gift. However, he’s innately aware that this particular gift could be helpful. Maybe more to himself than to Eddie, but who knows? If Eddie gets his memory tank back on track and Steve gets someone that reciprocates his affections? 

The payoff might be worth the weirdness.

“I actually wanted to contribute to your…” Steve gestures apathetically at the stack of tapes.

Eddie looks over at them and then back to Steve. “Oh you mean, Munsonopolis?”

“Boooo.” Steve heckles him immediately for that.

“You think of something better then.”

Steve thinks about this way too hard. “The Ed-pire State Building.”

“Boooo.” Eddie imitates Steve’s heckling.

“Better than yours.”

“Says who?”

“Says anyone with a sense of humor.”

“Brave of you to call that a sense of humor.”

“What can I say?” Steve clicks his mouth twice and does the most douchey finger-gun bit, blowing out the nonexistent smoke from each index finger. “I’m something else.”

Eddie bites down over his lip, hard enough that it goes white for a second. Doesn’t take his eyes off of Steve while he bares down.

“You sure are, Steve.”

Oh shit - did they just mindlessly segue onto Flirtation Boulevard without even trying? Is it really that natural with Eddie? Damnit, Steve needs to get his mind on the task at hand.

“Here.” He walks over, lays the tape on Eddie’s lap.

“Is this another one from Gareth?” Eddie flips the tape over, studies the back. “Cause I already assured him that I remember the concert we went to back in ‘84.”

Eddie remembers one of his closest friends.

“No, this one is actually…” Just fucking own up, Steve. “Well, I made it.”

Eddie’s eyes do that sequin thing again. Almost turn into disco balls. “You made me a mixtape?”

Ugh. “Don’t get too flattered, Munson.” 

“Too late.”

Steve was afraid that might be the case. So he does his damndest to channel Dustin Henderson. Provide a scientific explanation to his crush-driven theory. “It’s just an extension of our little music experiment. Some stuff that will help you remember me.”

“And why exactly do you want me to remember you?” Eddie does the same lip biting thing from before. He bites harder, and the color stays white even longer this time.

Steve involuntarily glances down at Eddie’s arm, giving himself away.

“Oh.” Eddie stops biting his lip, swiftly lifts the blankets over his arms. Hiding what Steve already knows is there. “Look… that’s just -”

“You don’t have to explain yourself, really.”

Eddie looks down, nodding in agreement. “Right. But it’s not-”

“Eddie.” Steve places a firm hand on Eddie’s shoulder because he can’t. He can’t listen to whatever Eddie is about to confirm or deny. “It’s okay. I mean it.”

He’s not ready for it, for whatever barricade that’s between them to come crashing down. Steve didn’t bring the proper tools to shield himself from raw emotions or desperate declarations of true feelings. And from the way Eddie goes breathless and tense under Steve’s shoulder-grip, he doesn’t think Eddie has the proper tools for that either.

“So you uh…” Eddie peers down at Steve’s hand. Catches a glimpse then abruptly looks away again. “Do you want me to listen now or…”

God no. Steve releases his grip at that thought. “Wait till I leave.” 

“Got it.”

The rest of the visit goes both fairly smoothly. There are only a few lingering particles of awkward tension left behind. It doesn’t bother Steve, not necessarily. The whole day has been kind of all over the place, just like Eddie’s Literary Behavioral Scale. So this uneasy atmosphere is to be expected.

They talk about movies while Steve packs up his things to leave. Eddie asks about all the new movies that have come out since he’s been in the hospital. Steve tells him to make a list of the ones he’s interested in seeing. Tells him that they’ll have a marathon at his place once they’re released to vhs. Eddie says he knows a guy that sells bootlegs before the vhs release date, but Steve shoots that idea down so fucking fast.

It’s not their usual banter, but that’s okay. At least they're talking. Getting along. Tolerating one another at a lukewarm temperature again.

“Steve?”

“Yeah?” Steve is met with the most anxiety-ridden face. Eddie’s whole forehead is covered in wrinkles, like that one fancy dog breed that his next-door neighbor used to have. There’s no shimmer in Eddie’s eyes, no disco balls. It’s all just dull. Fearful.

“Sorry if the arm thing made you...” Eddie trips over his words. He pinches the skin between his eyes, makes his even more forehead wrinkles. “I don’t know what’s the word I’m looking for.. Uncomfortable, I guess.”

“Don’t worry. It didn’t.” It made Steve a lot of other things: gutted, determined, confused, sulky, smitten. But no. Worried did not make Steve’s grocery list of Feelings.

“Don’t forget to tell Sam about the batteries on your way out.”

Eddie remembers bitching about the batteries.

Yeah, Steve’s memory isn’t the faulty one here. Even so, Steve reassures him:

“I won’t forget, Eds.”

Day 56:

Wayne had a couple days off from work and took over Steve’s Wednesday and Thursday shifts in the hospital. It’s probably for the best - especially since Steve decided to do the most high school shit ever, and gift Eddie a fucking bouquet in the form of radio hits and plastic.

He’s breaking out from the stress, just marinating on what Eddie’s thoughts might be of the mixtape. It can’t be good. None of the songs are his typical riffs of eternal damnation or whatever. But it certainly sounds like Steve Harrington in a Speaker. So it better help him picture Steve dressed in the tackiest, most burnable sweaters imaginable, goddamnit.

But like, why is he breaking out from thinking about Eddie Munson? Absurd. All of it. The feelings and the acne. His weird little crush is making him regress into adolescent woes and it’s pissing him off.

After popping the zit and crossing his fingers that it’s not outrageously noticeable, Steve sucks in a deep breath, and heads into Eddie’s hospital room.

“There’s my favorite Material Girl.” Eddie lowers the headphones, smiles bonus-level wide.

Steve’s gulps. His face feels like a fucking toaster. “I take it you listened to the tape?”

“I didn’t just listen to the tape.” Eddie picks up the Walkman and smacks it against the side of his head. “I practically absorbed that bubblegum bullshit. Think some of it is still stuck in my teeth.”

Steve plays along, hoping that his face will return to its usual complexion. “You should see a dentist about that.”

“With what insurance?”

“That’s fair.” Steve slides his hands into his jean pockets. He’s so rigid. “So?”

“So?”

“Final conclusion?”

“Oh, I hated it.” Eddie says bluntly. “In a very stick-that-syringe-in-my-neck kind of way.”

“Shocker.” Steve actually expected a meaner response than that.

“Why did you put so many songs on there that use Girl in the title?”

“Hey - it’s not my fault that all of the rich poster child songs are about women.” Steve gets defensive about that one. Honestly, it’s true. There needs to be more music about wealthy guys with genetically flawless hair. Somebody needs to get on that shit so Steve can have more songs that apply to him.

“Whatever you say, man.” 

“So did it…” Steve is still standing. Hovering a bit. “Did it help?”

Eddie sticks out both of his arms, flipping to reveal his forearms to Steve.

They’re blank, besides the usual tattoos and contusions. They’re as blank as Eddie’s arms can be at the moment. No more Steve Cheat Sheet to be found.

Steve exhales all of his relief. “And you remember me?”

“Remembering you was never the problem, Steve.”

“It wasn’t?”

Eddie shakes his head. “But if I ever allowed myself to forget, I…” He taps rapidly over the Walkman. Steve’s Walkman. “I just didn’t wanna risk starting over.”

“Oh.”

“With you.”

The metaphorical arrow, the one Steve has alway seen on department store Valentines Day cards, goes straight through his chest. Eddie aims the words with you directly for Steve’s heart. Punctures that wall he built up after Nancy Wheeler.

The monitor connected to Eddie is beeping faster again. It’s not like that day Eddie was writhing in pain. No, it’s a different tempo.

It sounds like his nerves are conducting the pattern. He’s nervous. Steve is making him nervous.

Or Steve’s lack of response is making him nervous.

But how does Steve respond? Is this Eddie giving him permission to flirt back again? To keep driving down the detour of attraction, take the scenic route?

Eddie’s heart monitor is screaming, ‘say something, Steve.’

But Steve’s archive of failed relationships is screaming, back, ‘don’t fuck this up, dickhead.’

Steve tries to meet the two in the middle. Say something inviting yet keep it simple.

“So… do you wanna make fun of the shitty soap operas together?” 

Steve puts a little emphasis on the together part, hoping it’ll tame the monitor. Make the tones evenly paced. He lets his hand tap once against Eddie’s arm. Right over his newly blank wrist. So clean. No more scribbles.

“I don’t know, I’ll have to check my schedule.” Eddie teases with his words, sure. But his hand lifts up. Tapping Steve back. Twice. “I’m a very busy man, you see.”

Steve shoves him away, laughing as he does it. “You’re ridiculous.”

“You’re not wrong.”

His monitor is ballad again.

One of Eddie’s (many) doctors walks into the room during their third hour of mocking the Home Shopping Network. Eddie has developed an elaborate backstory that they’re all cyborgs who are taking civilian money to grow their army of killer robots. Steve is surprisingly on board with this theory after the second hour. Some red headed lady twitches her eyes way too much to be human.

The doctor runs a few tests, looks over Eddie’s chart, the typical procedure. However, at the end of the visit, he decides to put Eddie on a new medication for his headaches. 

Headaches…

Steve flips back to that first day he started visiting Eddie. Finds the note he passive-aggressively took back then:

Eddie has a headache (that’s not a memory thing - he’s just told Steve a thousand times now).

He fans through the other pages as well. At least two-thirds of them mention Eddie complaining about headaches. How did Steve miss this? How could he be so stupid? He was too busy fantasizing about Eddie’s chest tattoos and making shitty mixtapes, that he glossed over something so significant.

Dustin wouldn’t have missed this. Robin wouldn’t have missed this. Nancy definitely wouldn’t have missed this - hell, she would’ve already cracked the Case of the Missing Memories by now. 

Steve is the wrong man for this job. Not enough brainpower to fix a broken brain.

“Uh oh.” Eddie says. “Where you’d go, Harrington?”

Steve glances up to see Eddie pointing his finger at Steve’s head. “Just.. thinking.”

“Share with the class, please.”

Steve struggles to make his voice sound causal about this. “I should’ve known about the headaches. Paid better attention.”

“Are you joking?” Eddie asks. “Because if you are, we need to work on your delivery.”

“Not joking, no.”

Eddie’s tone is mildly annoyed, still gentle though. “Stevie… that guy gets paid a shitload of money to figure out my problems. Truly - the reason there’s no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow is because it’s going straight into that guy’s pocket.”

Steve snorts. It’s even funnier to visualize because the doctor is kind of short.

“What I’m saying is, it’s his job to have a big brain.” Eddie’s eye contact is sharp. Broken bottle to his neck sharp. “And your job is to be my eye candy. Sit there and look cute while I try to not hack up my dinner.”

Steve’s hearing went crackly at all of the compliments. “Eye candy, huh?”

“Pretty much.”

Steve no longer has an excuse not to flirt back. Eddie has his mixtape; his arms are bare. He’s obviously encouraging it, even with the knowledge that Steve is a spoiled brat. He likes Steve, not just the good stuff. Eddie is still willing to pursue this even with Steve’s bad qualities.

So fuck it. Steve is gonna delve into his stockpile of pickup lines. He’s gonna rummage around his hoard of provocative catchprashes. Be the horny pack rat that he was born to be.

“Is the sitting part of my job description mandatory?” Steve leans forward, elbows resting on his knees.

“Oh, I’m very lenient on that detail.” Eddie’s voice drops lower. “The cute part… not so much.”

“So you’re only keeping me around for what? My great hair? My symmetrical bone structure? My biceps, maybe?”

“Definitely not your humility, that’s for damn sure.”

They share a smile as Steve gets up, inches closer to Eddie’s bed. He reaches out and pinches the sleeve of Eddie’s hospital gown between his fingers. He cautiously rubs it over a few times, waiting to see Eddie’s reaction to this droplet of affection.

Eddie catches Steve’s wrist with his other hand. Mirrors the rubbing motion Steve set in place with the material.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

Steve nudges Eddie lightly. “Is this okay?”

And before he can even get a response back, Eddie’s face starts turning grayish-green. 

This happens. Eddie throws up biweekly, so it’s not a big deal at all. It’s just that Steve is usually not laying on the moves when Eddie is about to blow chunks. Honestly, it knocks Steve’s astronomical ego down a few notches.

He probably deserves it.

Eddie is really sick. He pukes three more times, and he starts running a fever after the second time. He’s all clammy and curled into a pillow, clutching it with shaky fingers.

It’s all side effects from the new medication apparently. Yeah, Eddie’s head is no longer splitting open, but his body is rejecting all of the cardboard hospital food.

Steve keeps an eye on him, not that he can do much about it. He gets a styrofoam cup of ice chips so Eddie can chew on it whenever his temperature spikes. He wipes the sweat off Eddie’s temples because one - it’s a nice gesture, and two - it gives him an excuse to be nearby.

The shivering is driving Steve crazy though. He’s so on edge just watching Eddie like this. Eddie keeps making jokes like ‘at least I’ll remember your stupid worried face in the morning’ or ‘damn, my past better be worth all of this.’ And Steve will chuckle halfheartedly each time.

The heart monitor is all jumpy now. Even, uneven, even, uneven. If Steve focuses on it for too long, it starts to sound like he’s driving by a highway collision. A pileup of beeps and tones.

He gets another cup of cafeteria coffee. Hopes the bitterness and chalky creamer will be enough to muffle his hearing. Steer his mind to an empty exit lane.

“What? No coffee for me?” Eddie is under an extra blanket now.

Steve scoots his chair even closer to Eddie’s bedside. “What’s the point? You’d just puke it all up.” He’s pretty lousy at supportive words, isn’t he?

“Aren’t visiting hours almost over?”

“You trying to get rid of me, Munson?”

“Never. Just figured you needed to catch the bus or whatever.”

Eddie remembers Steve taking the bus.

“Robin finally gave me my car back.” Steve conveniently leaves out how he demanded  for it to be returned to him. “So, I’ll stay until they kick me out… if that’s cool with you.”

He places his non-coffee holding hand over top of Eddie’s open palm. It’s sort of instinctual. Doesn’t give his mind a moment to wonder if this is crossing a line. 

Holding hands in a hospital doesn’t mean romance. It never has. People do it all time, no one bats an eye at them either. It’s just a gesture of helpless support. It’s what people do to signify, ‘I can’t heal you with medicine, but I can warm your under-circulated skin just a little.’

But when Eddie’s fingers curl around his own, Steve’s stomach swells like its romance. It swells with hot air, helium maybe. It swells and stays swollen. Stays thermal and full.

“Looks like I’m gonna have to pay my eye candy overtime.” Eddie’s face rushes all pinkish-red. Almost as if he’s trying to combat his blush with humor, but it’s not working. He’s all the colors now. And with or without them, he’s attractive.

“You don’t pay me at all.”

“You got me there.” Eddie shakes a frizzy curl in front of his cheek. A poor effort to hide his flushed face. “I’m a terrible employer.”

Steve traces the grooves of Eddie’s palm lines. Pretends that they form a railroad track. “The worst.”

Once his fever finally breaks, Eddie falls asleep. His body unfolds, his fingers uncurl. It’s a heavy sleep, one that makes him all languid and soft. Any traces of bones are questionable now.

And even though Steve is about to pass out from exhaustion, he doesn’t move his hand from Eddie’s. He’d rather give up his whole arm than move it.

Sam peaks in just before Steve nods off. She lets in the bright hallway light, not too much though. Not enough to wake Eddie. Honestly, not a lot of things wake Eddie up these days.

“Sorry.” Steve yawns. “I overstayed my welcome.”

She shrugs, checks the fluids in one of Eddie’s IV bags. “You know, you can stay the night, if you’d like.”

“Really?”

“It’s pretty late… you shouldn’t be driving on the highway at this time of night.”

“Won’t I…” Steve reworks the phrase. Tries to be less selfish about it. “Won’t you get in trouble for letting me stay?”

“Oh no.” She winks. “Because I never saw you here.”

Steve smirks. “Got it.”

“But if I did see you here,” She gestures her head to the door on her right. “I would tell you there’s extra pillows in the linen closet over there.”

Sam deserves a fucking raise. Steve would become a goddamn patron of this hospital just to give her more money. Let the godsend of a woman retire early for christ’s sake.

“Thanks, Sam.” Steve whispers.

“Thank you for keeping him company.” She whispers back. “He’s lucky to have someone like you.”

Steve doesn’t know if that’s true, if Eddie is lucky to have him, but he nods anyway. Gives a gentle wave as Sam heads back out of the room.

He sets the pillow next to Eddie’s leg, keeping their hands connected as he dozes off. Steve falls asleep the same way he used to fall asleep in class. All bent over in his chair, one cheek flattened out on the desk. It’s very reminiscent of that.

Only better because he’s with the guy that makes his chest swell, even when he’s being sarcastic or melodramatic. Even when he���s cobwebbed himself into a maze of cords. Even when he’s bitching about batteries and Steve’s vomit-inducing fashion sense.

Steve thinks maybe he likes the undesirable traits of Eddie Munson just as much as the desirable ones.

And once he’s knocked out entirely, the rhythm of his heart matches the beeping monitor hooked up to Eddie’s chest.

Day 57:

It’s been a long time since Steve has had a decent dream. And this dream he’s in right now? It’s fucking luxurious.

He’s at the hair salon, because of course he is - it’s his home away from home. 

His head is reclining back in that giant sink thing. The one that’s like a soup bowl for hair or whatever. The stylist is shampooing his scalp, scrubbing all of those foamy products into his roots. This is Steve’s favorite part of getting his hair done, he always feels blissed out of his mind afterward.

They keep washing it for the whole dream, digging their nails into his head, dunking water over his hair every so often. It’s downright perfection. A dream he could stay stuck in forever. 

The scenery of the dream flickers out, but the sensations linger as he gains consciousness. His squints both of his eyes open, immediately greeted by too much brightness, too much sunlight. Steve shuts them again, soaking up the remnants of his dream. The hair scratching that’s ongoing even though he’s awake.

Awake.

Steve is awake and can still feel all of that salon paradise. His brain finally wakes up enough to realize it isn’t a dream. It’s Eddie’s hands in his hair, combing it thoroughly.

Fuck, it feels so good too. Steve wonders if Eddie is aware of what he’s doing or if he’s also in that suspended place between awake and asleep.

It doesn’t matter, not really. It all feels way too incredible to care about the logistics. Steve nuzzles deeper into the pillow to hide the happy little hums that keep escaping through his mouth. 

Eddie doesn’t stop. He keeps moving his hand around. Twirling strands and releasing them. Ruffling strands and smoothing them. Massaging the pads of his fingers in all the right places. Every bit of it is dreamy. Better than the dream Steve initially believed to be unbeatable.

Being Eddie’s own personal petting zoo is way better. Miles, light years better. Is there any form of measurement longer than lightyears? Because it’s bigger and better than that too.

Eddie tugs a little harder, just once, but once is all it takes to make Steve melt. He open-mouth sighs into the pillow, hoping the fabric mutes the neediness of it. There’s drool on the pillow and it’s unclear if it’s from when he was asleep or if it occurred just from that one hair tug. 

“Steve?” Eddie’s voice still sounds coated in sleep. “Is this weird?”

Steve shakes his head no, still unable to lift his face from the pillow.

“Should I stop?”

Steve shakes his head much faster. Absolutely not. Stopping should be banished from Eddie’s vocabulary. The word ‘stop’ should be homeless as far as Steve is concerned.

Eddie tugs again, more firmly this time. The tug goes straight to Steve’s dick, which yikes. Humiliating. Yeah, it’s morning and this shit happens, but not this kind of boner. Not one brought on by hair salon fantasies and a metalhead with magical fingertips. This can’t be the reality of Steve’s life right now but somehow, it is.

“I think I combed through all of that cake-up hairspray.” Eddie talks as his hand continues to roam around Steve’s scalp. “Feels like cashmere now, so you’re welcome.”

Steve sighs again, pretty sure it’s much more audible this time because Eddie laughs.

“Embarrassing.” Steve mumbles. That’s all he can muster out without becoming a puddle of humiliation.

“The sounds you’re making?”

Steve nods.

“Oh that is not the adjective I would’ve gone with.” Eddie claws his fingers all the way down to Steve’s neck. “Not even close.”

Steve is all hormones now, all slurred speech and thoughtless words. “So good, Eddie.”

“Oh my god.” Eddie whines, sounds breathier than Steve. “You cannot say my name like that when I’m in a tissue-thin gown.”

Steve wants to sneak a peek, see if what Eddie is suggesting holds any truth. He resists, only because he’s trying to sort out his own tent-pitching problems at the moment.

He gradually lifts his head off of the pillow, back cracking as he straightens his spine out after hours of being shaped like fucking tetris piece. It’s the last thing he wants to do because it means Eddie has to take his hand out of Steve’s hair. But as Eddie pulls away, his knuckles brush against Steve’s ear, awakening this newfound urgency to not let this moment fizzle out.

Steve hops up onto the bed, sitting side-saddle next to Eddie. He looks through Eddie’s eyes, the ones that remind him of shimmery dresses and the backseat of his car on prom night. He looks through to find a reason to stop his actions. Stop his need to touch Eddie’s jawline or thumb over his lips. He’s searching for a reason to stop and finding none whatsoever.

“Do you remember me?”

“You’re Steve Harrington.” Eddie kind of stutters as he says it. “Hometown Slut extraordinaire.”

The nerdy bastard is never going to let that one go.

Steve gives a quiet laugh, leaning in to his impulses. He slides his thumb over Eddie’s bottom lip, curving around, mapping invisible outlines. A blueprint for his imagination when they’re apart later. “Am I reading this wrong?”

Eddie’s gaze is glued to Steve’s lips as he shakes his head no.

“Good.”

Steve uses his free hand to lift himself up, get closer. Breathing in the same stale oxygen, sucking up the same early morning courage, existing in the same dizzying climate.

He can feel Eddie exhale softly over his skin when there’s a knock at the door.

Steve has never stood up so fast in his damn life. Gets a head rush that’s so overwhelming that his vision speckles out momentarily. 

It’s Sam. Thank god it’s only Sam. But also, screw god for interrupting what almost happened just now. Not cool, sky man.

“Just a heads up,” she starts, shutting the door behind her. “You have another visitor that just arrived.”

Right. It's the weekend.

Steve and Eddie say it in unison. “Dustin.”

Sam hums in reply. “I can stall him for a couple minutes. Give you time to sneak out the stairs that are tucked in the back hallway.”

“You’re the best.” Steve says. “I’ll be quick.”

She leaves, cracking the door on her way out.

Both of them just look at each other for a moment. There’s no time to even discuss the events that just took place. No time to recover the kiss that is already sneaking out the back hallway stairs.

Steve nervously whistles. “So…”

“I’ll see you Monday?”

“Monday.” 48 hours apart seems insane. “Yeah.”

Steve hurriedly makes his way to the door - refusing his horny impulses the opportunity to kick back in and ruin everything. “See you later, Eds.”

Eddie licks over his bottom lip - the one Steve mapped out with his thumbprint. “Later, sailor.”

Um. What?

Steve’s eyes go large. “What did you just call me?”

“Go.” Eddie flashes the wickedest grin. “We’ll talk all about your ocean of flavor on Monday.”

This can’t be happening. “Ocean of -”

“Get out of here already!”

Steve flings himself out of the room, sprinting down the hall. Does Eddie actually recall Steve working at Starcourt? How can that be possible? Steve doesn’t remember seeing Eddie outside of school ever. 

Plus, they’ve never even talked about his job at Scoops Ahoy. Family Video? Sure, that’s more recent. But Scoops? Steve tries to forget just about everything from his time at that seaside shithole.

Goddamnit, this is confusing. The hair foreplay. The almost-kiss. The nautical nickname. Confusing is an understatement. Steve needs to go back to high school and learn a better word for what this is. Confusing isn’t cutting it anymore.

If Steve can make it till Monday without spiraling into a bucket of nerves, he deserves a fucking trophy.

And a kiss on the lips.

Mostly the second option (although a trophy would be nice too). 

[howtodolife]

LATE NIGHT SUBTLETIES AND A MILLION MORE CONTROVERSIES

Summary: Reader wakes up at night and doesn't find jungkook beside her but instead in the kitchen, cooking.

Fem!reader × Jungkook

Warnings/Tags: pure fluff, hurt/comfort, insecurity, mentions of stretchmarks, manhandling (A bit?), oc is nervous and restless, she's so in love it makes her jittery and overwhelmed 😭, jk being an absolute sweetheart, REASSURANCE, bit suggestive in the middle but nothing happens, they're so in love it hurts 😭😭💗 (pls tell me if you find any more warnings, I'll add them!)

Writer's note: why is it so hard to write kiss scenes‼️?? it's my second fic, It originally started as a pure fluff imagine but I couldn't help it and made it a bit sad, so now it fits into the hurt/comfort trope more 😭😭 I'm not very happy with how it turned out because it feels kinda personal and I pondered not posting it but here I am. I hope you guys like it! Also it gets better in the end👍😭

"It must be midnight," you thought to yourself as your eyes drifted open, adjusting to the darkness around you. You reached out to the other side of the bed, hoping to find security and warmth, hoping to find Jungkook—the one you sought for love and a sense of belonging. Surprisingly, all you could find was an empty mattress and bedsheets, as well as pillows cold from being unused. Quickly getting up, panic flooded in for a short moment. "Jungkook," you called out, receiving no answer. You walked to the living room, eyes searching for him, and that was when Jungkook caught your sight. He was in the kitchen, cooking god-knows-what with his back turned toward you. The room had a purplish hue due to the dimmed lights, and the atmosphere felt cold with the AC blasting at full temperature. Jungkook turned toward you, hearing your footsteps, giving you a slight smile that had a hint of slyness. You walked closer to him. You felt Jungkook's hand snake around your waist, and then strong tattooed arms lifting you up onto the cold marble countertop. You squirmed due to the sudden movement, gripping onto his shoulders for stability. "Oh my god," you exclaimed, earning Jungkook a chuckle. You rolled your eyes at him. "Hey, c'mon, it's fun!"

"Sure", you retorted. "Besides, why are you making ramen at 2:46 a.m", you mentioned, hitting his head lightly.

"I'm insomniac", stated Jungkook matter of factly. "Also I was bored since it's late and had nothing better to do, so naturally i decided to cook"

I tilted my head at him and hummed in response. He looked beyond beautiful right now. Sharing these little moments together felt so domestic yet special; I'd trade anything for them. Jungkook gave me a quick glance before I felt one of his hands on my thigh, pulling me closer to him so that he could place kisses all over my face and neck. I grinned at that, placing my hands in his hair.

"You're never going to give me a warning, are you?", you asked, raising your eyebrow at him.

He chuckled "And miss out on these reactions? Nah, I'm good".

You wrapped your arms and legs around him, taking his presence in as much as you could. You would never get enough of it, of him. You wanted to stare into his brown bambi eyes forever, and even that wouldn't be enough time. You felt his hand travelling up and down your legs, Jungkook could feel the dents made by the stretchmarks on your legs here and there. You tensed a bit as you felt the warmth of his hand lingering there a bit more longer than the other areas, afraid he might judge you or find them weird but it was evident in his eyes that he couldn't care less. Jungkook's face reflected nothing but the feelings of love, respect and infatuation he felt for you. You felt the cold metal of his rings on your thighs as the grip of his hand strengthened, his head shifting closer to you. You breathed in his scent, shifting slightly closer to him. You gulped nervously, trying to calm your nerves down, heart beating loud in your chest at Jungkook being so close to you, the amount of intimacy you were sharing. You'd experienced it a countless number of times, but it still made you feel all restless and timid. "You can touch me, y'know", he chuckled, and then you lost it. Completely.

"God, I KNOW, its just that the feelings I have for you is so overwhelming and intense plus I don't know what the fuck to do with them. Sometimes I wanna jump off a building because of these and I'm always scared if I say or do something wrong or weird. It just holds me back from doing so much. I have so much love for you and it's unreal and crazy but you'll never get to know it because guess what, I'm too fucking embarrassed to do anything", you rambled and put your hand in your head, feeling upset, guilty and a bit disappointed.

You felt him grab your wrists and pull your hands from your face, holding them. He seemed to be taking in the whole of what you said and understand it in depth instead if coming up with a sudden reply. He scooted his head closer to you, as if trying to emphasize what he was about to say "nothing you do comes off as weird or out of place to me, understand? I love you, I love you, I love YOU, I can't stress this enough. You can never make me tired or upset with you, I love all of your little habits and mannerisms and i'll memorise all of them to take care of you and make you feel safe and wanted. Also, holy shit, that's a lot to carry all at once, Y/N. I don't want you to feel so pressurised and stressed with me, love. I'll do my best to not let these feeling get to you. Besides, I can recognize how much you love me by all your little gestures and the things you say" You felt him grab your chin and turn your attention towards him. "I love you, okay? Don't doubt that". You felt his lips brush against yours, making your heart jump, it was the gentlest of kisses, without the desire for something another. It intensified slowly, his hands grabbing your waist, pulling you even closer, making you his body press against yours. Although it was without the anticipation of anything other than this moment you were sharing, not with his hands under your shirt or tangled up in your bra straps. It was one filled with love and innocence, one that was unwavering. You suddenly felt his lips part from yours, a move unlikely for him to do. But then it dawned on you - the food. He reached for the spatula in a sudden movement, trying to do something to make the food edible, at least, though it didnt look like anything could be done.

"Fuck, no, no no. Not the goddamn ramen. I really don't want to eat it burnt, ah" Jungkook conceded.

He held his head in his hands, sighing in a defeated manner. You felt bad for him, though you couldn't help but burst out laughing. He narrowed his eyes at you.

"What, you asshole. There's nothing funny about this".

You raised you hands as if to signify that you were not at fault. "Hey, it's your fault. You should've been more careful and not shifted your attention elsewhere."

"Okay well, nobody told you to wake up at 3 AM to come here and distract me, it's all your fault" Jungkook accused.

You let out a sigh, jumping down from the counter "Just order in food and we'll clean up the mess together"

"Absolutely not, your "cleaning up" never ends well. I'm just left out here all by my own" he teased, fake crying.

You gasped in a dramatic way, half-joking, half-bickering."That's so mean, you absolute shithead. I would clean it up just to spite you and prove you wrong, but y'know what? I'm too tired. Good 4 me though, I'm saved from work" You shrugged.

"Just admit you can't do it" he retorted, putting the dishes in the sink, smiling the whole time.

"Not in my life, never."

[anonauthorsworkshop]

helloo, i stumbled upon ur mha x scp au and AHDSIHDSGISDGJ UR WRITING??? IS SO GOOD?? (also im new here hi, can i be 🎭 anon) more mha x scp au pls /nf tho

hii 🎭 anon :) i get a lot of requests for this au haha, sure!

previous part here

AU where MC is transported into the MHA universe with a SCP-summoning quirk. essentially a MHA and SCP crossover. you can read the rest of the parts under the tag #pp mha au

(note: i have never watched or read mha in my life and all of my knowledge is from fanfics and lazily googled questions! sorry in advance for any mischaracterizations or anything that just... doesn't make any sense? lol)

-

You lean forward, nearly falling off of your chair in the process. Squinting your eyes into narrow lines, you focus on one, crucial objective:

Trying to figure out what the hell is sitting right in front of you.

He looks like a cat, sort of. He reminds you of Josie, or, well, 529, with his feline-esque features and all.

Oh, you really should summon Josie here again sometime. It's been quite a while since you last have. That cat makes a good cuddle buddy. Even if she's missing the entire other half of her body.

You hum in thought, continuing to careen forward from your chair. No! This thing across from you is nothing like Josie. His ears look more like a bear, like 1048. Or could he be a dog? No, no... You've got it! He's definitely a rat!

Leaning back, you return to a proper sitting position and internally applaud yourself for finding the solution to your own ridiculous question. A rat, you think to yourself, face smug. Reminds me of a certain mask that drips black snot.

Wait a minute. The satisfied expression you adorn falters as you inspect the rat closer. What if it's not a rat, but a mouse?!

No, you're getting sidetracked! You take another bite of the banana you have graciously been given by your... captors? Do they count as captors if you willingly went with them?

The clearing of a throat. "Excuse me. If you could please answer the question..."

Oh, right. They're not really your 'captors,' just your interrogators, (that provide you with free food, might you add).

"What was the question again?" you ask, before not-so-elegantly stuffing the rest of the banana down your throat. You couldn't help but cave into your stomach's hunger; you haven't tasted this quality of fresh food in years! No more scavenging for meals or rummaging through garbage bins!

The man in uniform raises an inquiring eyebrow. You examine the badge attached to his right breast pocket: 'Detective Tsukauchi.'

He gestures to his side. "He asked you for your name."

Your eyes follow his hand's movements, and you find yourself gazing at the rat once more. "Oh, I wasn't paying attention." You admit shamelessly, grabbing another banana from the bowl placed before you. "I'm Y/N."

"Pleasure to meet you, Y/N." The rat smiles. You absentmindedly nod in response. "I'm Nezu, the principal of U.A. High. The man beside me is Detective Tsukauchi," you glance at the final stranger, "and this is Aizawa, a teacher at this school. He is also the one who found you. We would like to ask you some questions, as you are already aware."

"Sure," you comply, shoving another banana into your mouth. "I don't mind."

"How old are you?"

"Fifteen, I think."

"Who are your parents?"

You shrug, nonchalantly reaching for another banana. "Don't have any."

Nezu's grin widens slightly, and you watch him place a paw below his jaw. "Would you be comfortable telling us about what happened in that alley?"

Cocking your head to the side, you carefully peel off the banana's skin. "Which one?"

The detective speaks up. "The one you were found in."

Chewing another bite of your food, you tap a finger to your chin in thought. "Well, I was asleep until I heard a bunch of noise." Slowly, you turn to Nezu, replicating his ear-to-ear smile as you dramatically retell your experience.

"I looked up from my home, my beloved alleyway cardboard box, and saw two groups of people fighting. I decided to hide in my box until it was all over, but then one of them crashed into my home. They crumpled my box, and my hiding spot was revealed! The two groups started arguing about 'gang territory,' or whatever, and one of them decided to use me as a hostage and pointed a gun to my head."

You sink your teeth into your banana once more, oblivious to the horrified looks from every adult in the room.

"Oh, but it was fine," you casually continue, mouth half-full, "since, you know, I took care of it and all."

"When you say that you 'took care of it,'" the detective asks cautiously, "do you mean that you used your quirk?"

"My... quirk?" You scratch the back of your neck. "I guess it's my quirk? Don't know too much about 'quirks,' to be honest. I've never been to a doctor, or whatever specialist you go to for checking those out."

"Could you describe to us what it was that you exactly did?"

You gulp down the rest of your banana before replying. "You mean, in that alley? I summoned, or, like, conjured up one of those, uh." You pause, replacing 'SCPs' with another word to prevent further confusion. "Creatures? One of those creatures."

Tsukauchi looks you in the eye. "These creatures that you summon." You glance at the detective's hands, and you notice that they're trembling. "What do they do? What do they look like?"

"Usually I summon them to help and protect me." You explain with a shrug, "Oftentimes I encounter people who want to hurt me for some reason. There's a bunch of, er, 'creatures,' that I can summon, and they don't typically look like your perception of what's 'normal.'"

You continue, "There are endless possibilities, really. One looks like a teddy bear, just covered in human ears." Tsukauchi's eyes widen, as if his suspicions have been confirmed. "There's some that are long and bony. Some of them have these gigantic claws and razor-sharp mouths. Some of them are all gooey and acidic-"

"I believe that's enough." You turn to the side, taking a brief glimpse at Aizawa, who is standing beside you. Those were the only words he's spoken this entire time.

Turning back to the other two, you're about to grab another banana when you catch sight of the detective. You stare awkwardly, your hand paused mid-air. He seems to have completely spun on his heel to face away from you, hands clutching the wall as he gags and dry heaves. You scoot back in your chair uncomfortably.

"...And you do not have a home, correct?" Nezu stands up from his seat, approaching yours.

"Well, I did, but like I said, my cardboard box was destroyed because of those two rival gangs, or whoever they were."

"I see." He raises a paw so as to pet the top of your head. You clumsily bend down in your chair, allowing the two-foot-tall principal to reach your height. "We can arrange something for you. You may stay in a personal dorm here for free, if you would like." He smiles, "So long as you attend this school, the police force has also gladly agreed to erase your criminal record!"

You gawk at him. "C-criminal record?" Well, you guess you usually do end up leaving a mess of dead bodies behind, but it's always in self-defense!

"You should know it is illegal to use your quirk unlicensed and in public, Y/N."

Surveying the room, you dart your eyes from person to person. In the corner of the room, the detective, who is on the verge of vomiting up his insides. The man beside you, Aizawa, who refuses to look at you. The one standing in front of you, Nezu, who is blackmailing you, but is also offering you free shelter and free food...

You huff, grabbing Nezu's paw and shaking it wildly. "It's a deal, then."

[clu-ven]

It's the Thought that Counts

It’s my birthday and I thought what better way to celebrate than a small fic with Fives!  (Apologies in advance, this isn’t proof read. Also! I'm v new to this and currently working on making a masterlist so pls bear with me lol)

Summary: Fives takes on the brutal task of trying to cook pancakes 

Tags: surprises gone wrong, fluff, minor burns, many kisses, suggestive but nothing nsfw

Word Count: 1.2k

For once, you take your time waking up. There’s no need to rush, no battle you need to hurry off to (both literally and metaphorically). Right now, there’s only one thing you need to do and that’s relax. 

As your eyes flutter open, you’re greeted by a gentle stream of the morning sun flowing in through the window. Although you have yet to check your clock, it feels too early to get up.

Shutting your eyes, you nuzzle into your pillow, stretching your arms across the soft bed sheets. You mindlessly search for your best source of warmth, assuming he’d still be fast asleep next to you. 

Even though Fives is used to getting up at the break of dawn most rotations, he tends to sleep-in whenever he gets the opportunity, which is usually when he stays over at your place, preferring to relish in your softness than get out of bed. 

But today is different. Running your hand along the bed, you find no one there. Maybe it’s later than you thought. You know Fives could only stay for a while, needing to get back to base at some point in the morning. Maybe he didn’t want to disturb your sleep and quietly left. A disappointed sigh falls from your lips, already missing his company and yearning for his touch. 

You want to bury your face in your pillow, not ready to deal with the day… but then it hits you, a smell finally reaching your nose and making you instinctively scrunch up your face. It’s an intense burning smell, causing your body to wake up immediately as panic surges through you. Any hope of falling back to sleep quickly fades away as you go on high alert. 

Jumping out of your bed, you don’t waste any time in putting on some actual clothes, stumbling across the room and down the hall in nothing but your underwear and a loose fitted t-shirt you carelessly threw on the night before.

Endless possibilities race through your mind. Did Fives decide to make himself a quick breakfast but forget to turn off the stove? Did you leave it on yesterday? Oh kriff, has the stove been on all night? Expecting to see a blazing fire, you crash into the room. 

Standing in the middle of the kitchen, Fives mutters a curse under his breath as he runs one of his fingers under water. Beside him, what looks like a charred pancake is stiffly poking out the top of a pan. A light haze of smoke envelops the kitchen, slowly drifting up towards the ceiling.

“Fives?” the words stumble out of your mouth, a mix of confusion and shock taking over.

Glancing behind his shoulder at you, Fives flashes you a forced smile. “You’re up!” he exclaims, gritting his teeth together “Great timing”.

Pulling your attention away from the cremated pancake and cloud of smoke, you focus on him. “What happened? Is your finger ok? You move deeper into the room, rushing to his side.

Without thinking, you take his hand in yours, the cool water running over your skin as you pull his finger closer to you. Fives sharply inhales as you remove his hand from the water, his finger beginning to throb again. 

“It looks worse than it is” he tries to assure you, though the bright red mark along his finger tells you differently. 

“Are you ok?” you know it’s a dumb question but you ask it anyway, worry gnawing at your stomach..

Fives nods his head, shrugging off the injury “I am, it’s just a small burn, nothing to worry about”.

“I think I have some small bacta patches around here somewhere,” you think aloud,  tentatively holding his hand in yours and inspecting his burn “hmm, it doesn't look like a third degree burn, it should heal in a few days if you don’t overwork yourself”.

Thankfully it isn’t a serious injury but it's definitely enough to give you a fright. Beginning to relax, Fives jokes “If you think this looks bad, you should see the other guy”.

Looking up at him, you raise an eyebrow “And the other guy is… a pancake?”.

He sighs at the reminder of the food, a look of defeat crossing your lover’s face. “I wanted to surprise you before I left,” he explains “and I thought it would be easy to make but I think the pancake’s won this round”. 

Letting his hand fall gently from your grasp and to his side, you bring both of your hands up to cup his face. “And it is a surprise – a good one!” you quickly add that last part, wanting to reassure Fives in any way possible. 

A small smile tugs at his lips but Fives glances over at his horrible attempt of a pancake and disappointment clouds his face once more. “Hey,” you say softly, quickly pressing your lips to his before pulling away to look at him again “it’s the thought that counts”.

You can see the love in his eyes, his adoration for both you and the endless amount of patience you have with him. Pulling you close, Fives wraps his arms around your waist and gives you a small peck on the lips before trailing kisses along your face and up to your ear. 

You giggle at the sensation, letting out a soft moan when he nips at your ear. “You sure you don’t want to try it anyways?” he asks, removing one of his arms from you and picking up the pan. You get a waft of the burnt food as Fives brings the pan closer, inspecting the catastrophe he somehow created.

“I mean, it might be edible,” he doesn’t sound very convincing “maybe it’s just well done”. With your arms around him, you bury your head in by his chest and laugh. “Yeah why don’t you bring it with you? I’m sure the General would love to have it for lunch” you call his bluff.

Fives rolls his eyes “Pretty sure they’d court martial me if I did… or they’d at least put me on sanitation for a month”.

“And you’d be the hottest ARC Trooper on sanitation” you say with a teasing smile, moving your head to peer up at him.

Fives chuckles, the vibrations warm against you. “I would be the only ARC Trooper on sanitation” he corrects you.

Placing the pan back down, his stomach grumbles, reminding you of your own need for food. “You want to try another round?” you ask, reluctantly pulling away from him and moving to the sloppy bowl of pancake batter on the kitchen counter.

You hear a low groan and Fives is quick to follow after you, his body pressing yours against the counter. Dropping his head to your shoulder, he kisses it before asking “Here or the bedroom?”.

Trying to contain a laugh, you clarify “I meant do you want to try another round of pancakes”. You can feel his body slump “Oh”.

“But…” you trail off just to tease him “if you don’t burn the next batch of pancakes then maybe you’ll get a reward”. 

“Oh!” He repeats but the quick change of tone as he practically stands to attention tells you exactly how he feels about this offer. “Well then I better get cooking,” although Fives pulls away from you, he keeps one hand on your body, gently holding you as he moves back to the stove “especially since I suddenly got this new wave of motivation”. He gives the plush of your hip a squeeze before letting go, shooting you a wink. 

You roll your eyes but you can’t hide the broad smile on your face “Get cooking, trooper”.

[thesparklingwriter]

(psst: today it's angstober. )

truth

“You’re not a product of your circumstances, and you are not defined by the misfortunes you’ve been privy to.”

tags: pet names, Zhongli is very pure, soft Zhongli, fem!reader, Zhongli and reader are in a relationship, reader has a traumatic past, Zhongli doesn't know but he has his suspicions, i think this is hurt comfort but idk

content warnings: seasonal depression, nightmares (pls let me know if there's anything that should be added)

masterlist | ao3 link | taglist | next

please do not repost or edit my work without credit. reblogs are greatly appreciated!

i'm also taking requests for the rest of the flufftober days, PLEASE leave any suggestions, cause i am running out of ideas... i'm also considering adding a taglist, so send me an ask if you want to be added :)

Zhongli knows you more than you realise he does. He knows you like staying up late and sleeping in, and he knows you hate sweet things.

But it’s what he doesn’t know that worries him the most—when he can see the terror and pain behind your eyes, when he knows you’re in pain, but he doesn’t know what is causing it.

He knows that when winter comes around, and temperatures plummet, things seem to get harder for you, but he doesn’t know why. You shiver and fold into yourself, as if to conserve heat, no matter how much he heats the house. Your smiles are forced and your energy low.

At night, you thrash in bed trying to escape from some nightmare you can’t ever seem to disperse. The first time he tried to console you, you shot up, suddenly awake , a muttered a groggy “who are you?” escaping your lips as you scrambled away from him.

Since that night, he leaves a dim lamp on in the room, one you can use to identify him when the dreams start chasing you. He’s also had to accept that he can’t try to console you, no matter how heart wrenching he finds your sobs. He has to wait until you seek out his touch, and most nights you do, sliding your shaking hands around him. He doesn’t sleep until they’ve settled, and he knows you’re peacefully sleeping.

Sometimes, when you’re walking around Liyue together, he feels you grab onto his hand tighter, although he can see nothing that threatens him. He eyes scan the crowd to see who’s threatening his beloved, but he can’t find anything but the evidence—you digging yourself into his side. He doesn’t ask any questions except the obvious—“Do you want to go home?”

He knows that loud sounds and sharp movements put you on edge, especially if it’s in a place crowded with men. He’s pieced together that they are the problem, but he can’t do anything but avoid them whenever he can until he hears it from your mouth.

It hurts him to see how you’re suffering on your own. He promised he’d help you with anything you were struggling with, but you won’t let him help you with this. All he can do is try his best to keep you happy when the ghosts of pain and terror begin to reflect in your eyes.

“What do you want for dinner?” You ask him, one mild afternoon. Zhongli looks up from his book, only to see you reaching precariously for the plates. He’d meant to have that cabinet lowered for you, but he’d hesitated because it stopped you from bothering with menial tasks like putting the dishes away. He didn’t like burdening you with things like that.

“I’ll cook, don’t bother yourself with the plates,” he says softly, watching you with unrestrained curiosity.

“No, I want to—” The plates Zhongli told you to not bother yourself with clatter to the floor in a spray of ceramic shards. He calls for you, telling you to not move so you don’t cut yourself, but the commotion is too much for you, and you panic. Tears bunch up in your eyes, and you scurry away, narrowly missing the shards that surround you on the way out.

He wants to rush to you, to check that you’re okay, but such smothering never really does anything good, so he settles for cleaning up the plates—just so you have enough time to calm down. He makes quick work of the shards and sets to finding you.

He knows you aren’t downstairs, and upstairs is almost as hopeless. Too many rooms and doors to look behind. If you’re not in the obvious places, the only thing he can do is sit and wait for you to come out. He decides to start with the simplest option: your room. When he doesn’t see you in there, he tries the adjacent bathroom.

“Are you in here, love?”

You don’t respond for a long time. “Go away.”

He backs away from the door until he hears your lilting voice again.

“Are you mad at me?”

“Of course not,” he says softly. “I’m just worried. Are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” you sniff. Usually, he’d take this at face value, but today, he doesn’t.

“I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong,” his chest constricts as he whispers the words. He almost sure you don’t hear him, until you yank the door open.

“Do you even want to know?” You ask lowly. “Do you even want to know how messed up I am?” Tears start readily streaming down your face, as you stare at Zhongli, your arms wrapped around yourself as if to make yourself smaller. “Do you want a reminder that the girl you’re dating is well and truly—”

Zhongli gently pulls your hands away from your sides. “My perception of you is not influenced by your circumstances or your appearances. Nothing you tell me could ever make me change my mind about you.”

You look away from his earnest gaze. It’s embarrassing, admitting that you’re not okay. Admitting that it’s all been an act, that you’re terrified he’s going to be like the rest of them. Admitting that despite years of being together, you’re still terrified that he’ll snap and take his stresses out on you. Admitting that you’re terrified that he’ll turn out to be just like them.

It’s humiliating.

“Talk to me, love.” Zhongli whispers. “Please.”

You resist for a while, minutes turning into hours as you spend the rest of the day pointedly avoiding the subject matter. Zhongli doesn’t press you, or expect you to say anything. At the very least, he’s glad you’ve cheered up slightly.

In the evening, when nightfall rolls around and you curl into bed next to him, he feels you clear your throat.

“Are you alright?” he whispers into the dim room. You swallow.

“I’m…sorry,” you whisper. “For not telling you. For making you navigate all of this with no explanation. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. You are entitled to your own choices. My existence shouldn’t threaten that.”

Zhongli rolls over to hug you close to his chest, and with your face pressed again the man you’ve grown to love, it’s then that you finally get the courage to tell him about everything you’ve been through—everything you can remember about your family, your past, and the horrible memeories that you’ve kept packed away in some quiet corer of your mind—until your voice is hoarse, and your eyes are swollen from tears.

Zhongli is mainly quiet, stroking your hair to remind you that he’s still listening. His silence is scary–you’ve stripped yourself naked for him, so he can see deep into your mind and your thoughts, and his lack of response… It doesn’t bear thinking about.

“Do you want to me to leave?” You whisper softly. “I understand if you do. It’s a lot and–”

“I don’t want you to leave.” He replies, pulling you closer to his chest. “I would be content to follow you for the rest of my life is that was what you wanted.”

“But they–”

“You’re not a product of your circumstances, and you are not defined by the misfortunes you’ve been privy to.” Zhongli says, returning to stroking your hair. “I love you regardless, and I always will.”

a/n anon i hope this is good enough, i tried my very best <3

[venomous-ragno]

HI! could i pretty plz get a könig x reader fic where the reader is mourning the loss of a good friend? pretty pretty pretty pls 😭 i've been tryna get one forever i will do anything

König comforts a grieving reader

Tags: König x you (either platonic or romantic), gn!reader, grief, loss of someone dear to reader, hurt and comfort, reader feels a bit of hope at the end

Warnings: None

"I'm fine."

Your smile was just a bit too stiff when you replied to him, spoke about something with a tone much too cheery. You know he didn't buy it. That he saw how fragile and lost, how raw and vulnerable you truly were; he saw those puffy eyes and wondered how many nights you spent awake, crying until sleep claimed you. There was a shakiness to your breaths, deep and slow, as if to desperately control yourself around him; turning away from his analysing gaze so he wouldn't see how pale your skin got from not eating enough.

"I'm fine, König, really."

You laughed, but it didn't reach your eyes. "Just... Busy at work, my boss has been stressing me out. You know, the one who walks like a penguin? Yeah, he's always just complaining, but when I ask how to do better, he doesn't answer. Bet he doesn't even know himself, that f-"

That little oomph of yours muffled into is shirt. You wriggled some, chuckling nervously, but his arms around you didn't budge. His voice was but a whisper as he spoke, albeit ringing in your head like sirens.

"You're not fine."

A statement rather than a question. You knew from the very beginning that you couldn't fool him. That he'd see right through you, much unlike your coworkers, and it granted you some kind of comfort when no one saw the turmoil inside of you, but someone who was happy and steadfast.

That lump in your throat made it hard to speak.

"You worry too much, König", you took a deep breath trying to stabilise your shaking voice, " I- I'm fine... Really."

He didn't allow it. He didn't allow you to hide away in that cold, lonely place you dug for yourself. Not when he was right here, next to you.

"You don't have to pretend with me."

König, who always minded the volume of his voice. Who thought long and hard before he acted, who oftentimes did not speak even if he desperately wanted to - how come the words of a person like him were the ones that stung the most? They crawled into your ears, hot and cold, numb but oh so sensitive. You were certain he could hear it, that crack of your heart finally bursting.

You'd been strong for so long. Kept your chin up and chest tight, listened to others as they wept when you hadn't even allowed yourself to grieve. In all your pretending, all your acting and telling yourself that everything's fine, you're fine, somewhere in there you'd lost yourself; and he pulled you out with nothing but his bare self.

A solemn tear rolled down your cheek. You buried your face deeper into his shirt, and he held you tighter as the first hiccup trembled through you.

"It's hard," you said, voice trembling. "I feel like I'll never be able to move on. I just miss them so much."

"I know," König slowly responded, carefully pondering about his words. "But you know what? They wouldn't want you to be sad forever. They would want you to remember the good times and find joy in life again. And I promise you, you will. It might take a while, but you will."

You merely nodded, feeling a tiny glimmer of hope in your heart amidst all the emotions washing over you. Maybe König was right. Maybe you could find a way to move forward, even if it felt impossible right now.

"Thank you," your voice was hoarse. "Thank you for being here."

"Always," König said, holding you just a bit closer. "I'm not going anywhere."

He sat with you through the night, listened to you talking about fond memories of the person who had passed away, and about other things too. It wasn't a magical cure, but it was a start. A way to begin the long, slow journey of healing. And for now, that was enough.

[tsomwebcomic]

Welcome to the official blog for the webcomic 'Two Souls, One Mind' an Adventure/Comedy/Fantasy series.

This is where I (@palegalestudios) will be updating my webcomic, posting here as well as three(?) other platforms. I'll also be posting on Instagram, which is under the @/tsomwebcomic username, and (possibly) TikTok (still deciding).

This is for my comic ONLY! If you wanna see other tsom related stuff, like the ask blog, you can find it on my main blog (which I have tagged above).

A synopsis:

"We're told that legends and creatures of myth are just stories... Stories you tell to your children, or your friends.

But... what if they were real. What if there were two other races, creatures that we know from myth and... magical celestial beings, that lived with humans and were sealed away before the beginning of Ancient Greece.

Follow best friends Matt and Danny, and their new mythical friends, as they uncover this world in the modern day and try to stop it from disappearing forever, while also handling their own magical potential"

I have a lot planned for this story, and have been working on it for the past 3(ish) years now. I can't wait for you guys to watch all these characters get up to shit, while trying to save magic.

Quickly, just some basic boundaries:

I'm absolutely ok with fanart and fanfiction. In fact, tag me! I love to see the stuff!

With that being said, I'm also ok with headcannons and theories, as LONG as it doesn't ignore actual character and story cannon too much

The only acceptation to the rules above is anything NSFW. For my own peace of mind, keep it to the characters that are OF AGE!! (looking at you, you fucking pedo and proshipping creeps), but please don't tag me or show me... at all. In fact, don't show anyone else. I can't stop y'all, but PLEASE keep that to yourself, and in private. If I find out that y'all are using this to be weird with others I STFG, I WILL END YOU! /NEG

I don't wanna see ANYTHING weird or creepy towards me, my story, or anyone who interacts with this blog. I will fucking block you, don't test me, and I encourage others to do the same.

This is a safe space! I don't wanna see any bullying, racism, or any phobia towards the lgbtqia+ community, at ALL! Again, you will be Blocked!

If you do feel unsafe and I haven't done anything, possibly because I didn't see it (my notif feed is fucked so I miss a lot of stuff), pls reach out and I will sort it out :]

Please be patient. I'll try to update this comic at least once a fortnight (starting FEB 2024), but I can't guarantee that. So don't fill my inbox with "where's the next part?!" or "are you alive?!" I am alive, and unlike most people, I HAVE a life where I'm not at the screen 24/7 so... (I mean that in a light hearted way, but seriously don't @ me for the next part. It will come when it comes)

(Will update if needed)

Ty for reading, and enjoy your time here!

[rmd-writes]

22, 39, and 51 for the writing asks!

29. What’s your revision or editing process like?

I tend to edit as I write - most often, when I open a doc I edit what is already there before I start writing again which means that the beginnings of my fics have been edited several times compared to the endings.

About half the time, I send my fics to a trusted friend to beta for me. I always intend to do this more often, because my writing is always better for having that feedback but sometimes I get impatient, or I don't want to bug my friends (which I know is silly because when I get asked to beta things my answer is almost always *grabby hands* unless I really don't have time).

If I've had a fic beta'd then I go through the suggested edits, review the entire doc again myself and then post it. And then, because I tend to post fics right before I go to sleep, I open the fic in the morning and find a bunch of things I've missed after it's been up on ao3 for a whole night 😅

39. Share a snippet from a WIP

I'm sharing something from a wip that I'm writing with @welcometololaland that is currently on pause while we fight with our current wips! I am fairly certain that I'm the one that wrote this section, Lola pls tell me if I'm wrong, but we've gotten to the point where we can't remember who wrote what in some parts of this!

“What are you even doing here, Mom? You never come to these things.”

“I had a meeting upstairs, thought I’d come and see if you actually turned up,” Gwyn explains. 

TK glares at her. He hopes no one else can hear this conversation, because it’s embarrassing. The fact that he works for his mother isn’t exactly a secret, but he usually tries to maintain some level of professionalism when they interact in public. Sometimes it’s impossible. 

“You know the whole point of these events is that you talk to new people, develop new relationships, not hide in the corner with your best friend and gossip.”

TK glances at Nancy who is studiously ignoring him. “Of course, Gwyn. We were just discussing our plan of attack when you came over,” Nancy fibs. 

Gwyn looks at them both sceptically. “Mmhmm. See that he actually talks to someone new tonight, will you Nancy? TK, Nancy’s in charge tonight, she’s your superior after all.”

Nancy grins at that and TK rolls his eyes. “Fine.”

“And TK, honey, do up another button, this is a networking event, not a bar.” This time Gwyn does reach out and to brush some imaginary lint off his shoulder. 

“Didn’t you meet Enzo at one of these things?” TK retorts, even as he follows his mother’s instructions and does up one of his buttons. He can see Nancy trying to hold in her laughter next to him as she mutters, “this is the best thing that’s happened today,” under her breath. 

“I did. Doesn’t change the fact that I don’t want my son representing my firm at an event looking like he’s trying to pick up.” Gwyn takes a sip of her wine and makes a face. “I can’t drink this. Don’t forget we have brunch plans on Sunday, TK. Nancy, you’re welcome to join us if you’re free,” Gwyn says as she spins on one Louboutin-clad foot and strides away. 

51. What’s your total AO3 word count?

Officially, 434,572 but that includes a bunch of collaborations so I think the actual number is somewhere closer to 340-360kk

PS. I have snippet sunday tags from @iboatedhere @strandnreyes @liminalmemories21 @reyesstrand pls consider this my snippet sunday post too!

[wonderlandwalker]

Revenge is a Dish Best Served Cold | Sirius Black x Reader

Marauders Masterlist / Taglist / Inbox

Summary: James is trying to get back at Sirius, Sirius is in panic mode, and you do not understand what is up with either of them

Content Warnings/Tags: hurt/comfort, mentions of blood, fake pregnancy, potter!reader, miscommunication, my writing

Word Count: 3.1k

A/n: This is my first time actually posting any of my writing so I'm definitely incredibly nervous but I hope this will reach the right people. Just pretend the marauders had phones and tv's cause I dont know how to write around it. It's a story I wrote a while ago and it's not very long but if all goes well there is more on the way. Pls let me know if I've missed any warnings so I can correct it. Dividers by @saradika

“One day. One day, you will be sorry, Black. You won’t know when, and you won’t know how. But one day, you will be filled with regrets, and I will have my payback.” James sneered at Sirius while he was covered in slime.

“Do your worst, Potter.”

"Oh." "I will."

It was during your holiday trip that you first picked up on something.. a little out of the ordinary.

The prepaid phone that you had with you, the number of which you always only gave to a few people for emergencies, was going absolutely crazy. As you opened the bathroom door, the steam that escaped fogged up the mirror above the small vanity present in the room. The motel was clearly not among Italy's best, judging by the scrapped wallpaper and the stained floral duvet covers. It was your first time in Italy, and you made a note to yourself to visit again sometime.

As you put down the towel you had dried your hair with, you spotted the notification on your phone that alerted you to eight missed calls and five voicemails, every single one belonging to the same name.

Just as you wanted to check the voicemails, it started ringing again. The name and blank avatar illuminating the screen. You were about to pick it up as James snatched it out of your hand, telling you sternly that you had to get ready because you had already spent way too much time in the shower and he had to spend some quality sibling time with you while he could. With a quick note to yourself to call later, you let it go for now and decided to do as James said since you were too tired for an argument with him anyway.

In the city, the whole day's schedule had all gone as planned. Well, almost all. James decided to use you as a human shield against some of the incoming pedestrians around the corner and got you completely covered in the food they were carrying. Which meant you had to take three more showers before you had finally lost the smell of parmesan and tomatoes that lingered in your hair. When you no longer smelled like day-old pasta, the still buzzing phone caught your attention. James had left in order to grab some food after his stomach started to rumble, so you figured you had some spare time to call.

You hit the contact icon, and the phone started dialling. He picked up immediately, not even letting it ring once. He sounded panicked, frantic, not like himself. Many words leaving his lips, but not one understandable sentence forming.

“Y/N? Oh, God. I thought something had happened! Why didn’t you tell me?” His words came out quick, his accent thicker, so much it took you a second to register his words.

“He told me, right before you left, he told me. Why didn’t you tell me..?” You went deep into your mind to try and remember if there was something you had forgotten to tell him, but apart from finishing the last cauldron cake, which didn't seem important enough to you to call about , nothing came to mind.

“What? What are you talking about?”

Before he could say anything else, James walked in, a bit of blood dripping down the side of his face, but still holding on proudly to the two taco bags in his right hand.

“Do you have any idea how hard it is to find decent tacos in the middle of Italy?” He quips at you, his sarcasm shining through, even when he just clearly hit his head. Although you will not admit it to him, it always makes you smile.

You no longer have any idea what is being told to you through the phone, all you hear coming from it is a distant murmur. Your head is too focused on making sure James doesn’t pass out anytime soon.

“I gotta go, I’ll call you back later.”

“No, y/n wa-” but before he can finish pleading with you, you've hung up.

“I seriously don’t know what Italians have against tacos, but I had to bribe this guy before he would make some.”

“You don’t know what they have against tacos? We are in Italy, home of Italians and Italian food, and you want them to make you Mexican..?” Your eyebrows are almost in your hairline at this antics, even though you’d think you’d be used to it by now.

“Well, with that smell that’s been coming from you this past hour, I wasn’t really in the mood for Italian food anymore.”

“You’re an idiot, you know that? What happened?” You ask him, while motioning to his head.

“I was distracted and might have run into a lamppost. You want a taco?” He asks, even though he is already throwing it your way, your reflexes kicking in about a second before the bag hits you.

“Have you seen my phone?”

“I’m pretty sure you lost that a few hours ago at the church.” You can already hear his giggling next to you at the joke he’s about to make before the words even leave his mouth “Maybe if you pray hard enough, that god the muggles always talk about will come bring it for you.”

You were still laughing when you approached the next motel. The two of you were walking to the door. Well, you wouldn't call it walking. You were both pretty tired, and strolling would resemble it better.

When you get to the living room, you can see someone sitting on the couch. It catches you off guard first and makes you reach for your wand. But then you notice you recognize the guy sitting down, running his hand through his hair, he always did that when he was distressed.

Sitting on the couch was none other than the man who has been blowing up your phone the last few days, better known as:

“Sirius?”

But he doesn’t look up, he barely even moves. His hands only twitch slightly when he hears your voice call out for him. He’s shaking a little, his hands moving through his hair the only other motion he’s making. You don’t see him like this often, way too calm, or rather tranquil, for his normal outgoing personality. Even though you can tell there is a storm going on inside his head.

You realise you will have to get his attention in a different way, so you walk over to the couch and kneel down in front of him. Lifting up his face in your hands, taking it out of his own tense ones.

His eyes looked droopy, and the bags under his eyes were even bigger than yours currently are.

“Hey, look at me. Breathe.” You tell him in an attempt to get him to talk to you.

He closes his eyes, taking a deep breath before opening them again, but still avoiding eye contact. So he glances down to your stomach. His eyes widen almost comically and it makes you realise there is still a small tear in your shirt at your stomach from when you walked through the bushes in order the get the best roses, the thorns having pierced through it and creating a small cat-like scratch on your stomach. He turns almost completely white, and his head shoots up.

“You’re bleeding, why are you bleeding?”

“It’s nothing, Sirius, just a few thorns from rose bushes.”

“Why would you do something like that, something could have gone wrong, something could be wrong.”

“I- I don’t understand what you mean, we do things like this all the time, so do you.”

“I do, but you deserve so much better than me, don’t you ever see that?” He sinks back to his previous position, head in his hands, looking lost.

So you place yourself on his lap, your face only inches away from his, not giving him any opportunity to avoid you while you talk.

“What are you talking about? Siri, you are the best thing that ever happened to me, you keep me grounded through all the crazy. You are there to hold my hand when things go sideways. Can’t you see that I love you, you’re all I’ll ever need.”

“I just don’t want to lose you, I can’t lose you, I don’t think I’d ever get over it. I’ve been wrecking myself up this past week, because I can’t lose you. I went crazy when you didn’t answer me. And I’ll be here for anything you need, I’ll support whatever you decide to do. But, I’m not ready to be dad.” He closes his eyes when he’s finished, and you can see the tears slowly rolling down.

“What?” At this point, you understand even less than you did at the beginning of the conversation.

“I’m just not ready, with the lives we live. I can deal with the thought there might be someone who is trying to hurt me around every corner. But I cannot live with that if I’m a dad. If there is a little baby boy, or girl, that looks just like you, staring at me with those beautiful eyes, waiting for me to come back. It is already hard enough to do that with you, but at least if something happened, you would understand. They would have no idea what’s going on, and I can’t do that.

But I won’t lose you either, so I will be here every step of the way, supporting you, holding your hand, doing whatever you want me to. Just please, please don’t leave me over this, I can’t live without you anymore.” He sounds like he has been preparing this speech in his head for a couple of days, but he still stutters his way through it. His hands clammy and tight on your hips, as if he’s afraid you’ll leave if he lets go.

“Siriu-”

“No, please don’t say anything yet. Please just let me live in this fantasy where everything is alright for a little longer. Please.”

“Sirius, when are you going to start listening to me? I have no clue what you are talking about, but whatever is going on, let me help. Just take a deep breath, and try to explain it again. Tell me what’s going on inside that head of yours, because you’re freaking me out here. Did you sleep with someone else, and get her pregnant?” Your own panic is taking over now, and you stand up, walking away from him as if he’s burned you.

“Oh Merlin, I knew it was only a matter of time before you grew tired of me, I should have seen this coming sooner, I should have-”

But before you can finish your sentence, he is in front of you again, pressing you into the wall behind you.

“Of course I didn’t cheat on you, why would you even think that?” He says, his own turmoil temporarily paused to try and solve your panic first.

“I mean, maybe you found some blonde that piqued your interest and you just.. I don’t know, you’ve just always had a thing for blondes Siri..”

“I don’t have a thing for blondes, I only have one thing for one girl and she’s standing right in front of me.” He talks now with more certainty than anything he's said so far.

“Then, what is going on?”

He looks down at your stomach again, and this time you look with him.

“Is- is it okay?”

“Is what okay?”

“The baby.”

“What baby?”

He inhales slowly, before locking his gaze with yours.

“The baby. Our baby.”

His hands trace patterns over your stomach, before you stop them.

“If this is your way of telling me you think I got fat, you can go fuck off.” You say, starting to push him off you.

“No! I didn’t say that, I would never say that!”

“So you’re just thinking it, don’t have the courage to say it out loud Black?”

“How did we even get in this fight. I’m tired, you’re tired and I really don’t want to fight with you. Just, let’s go to bed, please.” He says, reaching out to hold you in his arms like he always does after you argue.

“No. Don’t touch me. I’ll sleep on my own tonight.” The look of hurt that flashes through his eyes almost makes you sink back into his arms and comfort him.

But you don’t. You walk away, your heart nagging you to turn back around when you hear him fall to the floor in defeat.

But you don’t.

“It has been a week now, and I still haven’t heard a word from her.” He was pacing in Remus’ room, his hands going wild while he was talking.

“I mean, she’s pregnant, she can't keep avoiding me forever, right? I know I shouldn’t have confronted her like that, but she’ll forgive me, right?”

“Take a seat Sirius, you are going to spiral through the floor if you keep this up.”

He listens, but his feet keep tapping against the ground in a nervous pattern.

“We have fought before. But never like this, we always made up before the morning, but she still won’t talk to me. She’s pregnant, she can’t keep going around being as reckless as she is”

This is probably the first time since he walked in that Remus looks up from the papers in front of him, giving Sirius a stern glance.

“I know, I know. It’s not my place to decide what she does with her body, but you’re telling me I don’t even get to have a little bit of an opinion in this? It’s her body and I respect that, she knows I do, but it’s also my baby.” A look of realisation flashes trough Sirius’ eyes.

“Oh Merlin, what if it’s not mine? Is that why she isn’t talking to me?”

“It’s really not my place to say anything Sirius, but you should go talk to James.”

“There’s no point in calling, she doesn’t wanna talk.” James answers.

“I know, I want to talk to you. Can you meet me on the courtyard in 10 minutes?”

He looks over to y/n, who still doesn’t completely look like herself. Maybe it was time to talk to Sirius.

“Alright, I'll see you there.”

He hangs up the phone, grabbing his coat.

“You want me to punch him in the face for you?”

It makes you smile a little, and James returns the expression.

“No.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”

“What if I just break his nose a little?”

“What do you wanna talk about Black?”

He walks up from behind him, and he turns around to face him.

“How many times did she watch it this week?” Sirius asks, his expression filled with longing.

“Too many, I swear to Merlin that if I hear Dorothy sing one more song I’m gonna throw that television all the way to Oz.”

“She always watches that when she’s upset, either that or-”

“Mary Poppins. Yeah, I know..” The two friends chuckle at their recognition of your habits, and Sirius continues the conversation.

“Please help me make things right, I’m out of ideas, but I won’t give up.”

“About that, there’s something I should tell you.” James says, trying to think of the right thing to say next.

“I know, the baby isn’t mine, is it? That’s why she won’t talk to me, that’s why she got so upset. But I don’t care, at first I thought I did, but I just want her to come back to me.” Sirius sounds desperate, and James can tell he’s trying to keep it together best he can.

“No, that’s not it. Look, I wanted my retribution, I got it, and at first I enjoyed it. But this has gone too far, she isn’t herself without you, and I don’t like it.”

“What are you trying to say?”

“It was a prank Sirius, y/n isn’t pregnant. She never was.”

James can almost hear the gears shift in Sirius' head, he can almost hear him think.

“Where is she.” He asks, whipping his head around as if you’ll be standing around one of the corners

“She went to the library.”

He is running so fast you can almost see the little clouds of wind behind his feet.

He turns left at the dining hall where he spent so much time trying to teach y/n to use chopsticks, runs up the staircases where she met up with him on the night of their first winter formal together, and makes a right after the charms classroom where they would always slip each other little notes until James went crazy. Opening the big double doors to where they would always study together. He doesn’t immediately see her. He can see a few groups of students trying to cram for OWL's, but pays them no mind. He figures you are probably near the checkout counter. Contrary to what some might think, it’s usually the most serene place, and you usually sits at the desks that are placed there, the one you carved your initials in once when Madam Pince wasn’t looking.

He sees yoy right at that desk, trying to read a book, but failing to. Tracing the pair of initials on the wood absentmindedly.

“Y/N!” Your head turns around at his scream in the ever so silent library.

“I’m still mad at you.” You tell him, looking back at your book

“James told me.” He looks at you hopefully as he talks.

“Good.”

“No, no that.” he huffs out a breath of annoyance before remembering what he came here for.

“He told me that you aren’t pregnant.” This finally makes you look up at him with a perplexed face.

“I know that, why are you telling me that?”

“Because I thought you were.” He looks like this will make everything make sense, but it doesn’t quite seem to come across yet.

“You thought what now?”

“I thought you were pregnant, that’s why I got so upset when you didn't answer my phone calls, that's why I got so concerned and that’s why I got so stressed.”

“But- why would you even think that?” The pieces are starting to come together in your brain, but you need a little more to get the full puzzle.

“Because James told me.”

And suddenly it begins to click in your head, every event replacing itself.

“I’m so gonna get him back for this.” You say, shaking your head at James’ antics.

“As long as I get to help.”

“Wouldn’t imagine it otherwise.”

[quiobi-art]

Yasss your majesty please do share older Quiobi works, I'm very recent to this ship and the amount of Quiobi artist who deactivate saddened me and the only way to find their art is via other's reblog, they are basically impossible to find by search/tags only and your blog is *chef kiss*

😂😂😂 thank you, and welcome! pls enjoy all the art I can find! and if you happen to spot some broken tags/links pls tell me about them 👀🙏

I think maybe the saddest thing about the deactivated accounts is that, in some cases, it probably wasn't even the artist's choice. Some people went on hiatus or moved on, and they're living their best life! But in roughly 2019, tumblr did a massive sweep and marked many posts nsfw. The filters were not great at the time—you got to see some pretty bizarre things flagged.

You could contest the flag! Some people just missed the window of appeals. Some of my favourite artists were/are inactive for 2+ years.

I mention a couple of interesting cases on my Error Log page. One of the more upsetting examples to me is this art by @schaloime (here's their twitter!), which is no longer accessible on tumblr at all. I know I've reblogged it more than once—it's completely missing from my archive and anyone else's. rol-rol's account was plainly deleted, though you can still find some pages through the wayback machine. Tumblr structure being what it is, it's incredibly difficult to archive an infinite-scroll, multi-page blog, so these posts are sadly limited.

And then there's the blogs that were hacked and taken over by porn/spam bots 😔

While I try not to repost art (simple enough) or reblog reposted art (somewhat slightly trickier sometimes), eventually I may begin reaching out to ask people if they mind me sharing their works. I've been shy about it, for various reasons, but it's under consideration.

Anyway!!! Always happy to have new ppl discovering the ship! Enjoy the lovely art 🥰❤️

[softboydrew]

sneak away and love me

warning: this piece has smut- oral sex

- long awaited first smut piece. pls don't bite my head off LMAO

Drew was in a predicament, a big one in fact.

You might wonder why, and it’s because of his girlfriend, who looks like molten sex appeal in a soft sugar cone while sitting on their shared towel with water droplets all over her newly tanned skin.

He watches her from afar as she innocently reads her newest beach read. He can’t help but smile at her, of course she’d try and get out of the water earlier than everyone else.

Which brings us back to why Drew mentally curses himself.

A weekend getaway with friends is always a good idea, but not when you want alone time with your girlfriend, and Drew hasn’t gotten any alone time with y/n since they arrived.

Granted, there hasn’t been time in between long beach days- to hourly dinners that lead to way too much overpriced wine, causing everyone including the couple to fall face first into their pillows.

“Who wants to go to the Airbnb and grab lunch?” Y/n says, snapping drew out of his sulky mood.

“I’m gonna stay” Maddie shouts back.

"Were good!" Rudy chimes in before turning around to splash the rest of your friends.

Drew looks around at their friends who shrug their shoulders, all of them still enjoying the refreshing water that helps them escape the heat.

Drew doesn’t even say anything while he feels himself splashing towards y/n, she’s sliding on her cotton shorts and smiling at him as she grabs her phone.

“You sure you don’t wanna miss water tag?” She says pointing towards her friends making him to crinkle his nose.

Y/n laughs, shaking her head at him before he grabs her small hand in his while they begin making their way back to the bungalow.

"I'd rather do something else" he says, licking his salty lips.

"I know, I'm starving!" she says, not catching the drift of his underlying comment. His lips tremble into a smirk at her innocence.

"Mhm" he hums.

-

"This sandwich has been calling my name all afternoon." Y/n chuckles as she reaches into the fridge to retrieve the sandwich in question. She garbs the bag of jalapeño chips from the cabinet and brings the food to the island counter, where her boyfriend sits, his fingers tapping impatiently against the marble.

"I bet." Drew says uninterested- sticking his tongue against his cheek as he watches her pop a chip into her mouth.

Y/n gives Drew a questionable look as she takes a bite out of her sandwich before looking around the large kitchen and back over at him. "Are you not going to eat?" she questions. "You didn't have to come here just for me, babe." she says, covering her mouth after swallowing her food.

"Oh I will, I'm just not in the mood for that." Drew says, making his way around the counter to stand next to his girlfriend who of course, has no idea what he's talking about.

"Okay, then get something else." she deadpanned. "I think we still have that potato salad in the fridge if you want."

Drew hums as he moves his body closer to hers and runs his finger tips against the back of her arm, causing a shiver up her spine as she reaches for the glass of water in front of her. "I don't want that either." he says quietly, making his way towards her damp hair, sliding it over her other shoulder.

Y/n's eyes widen once she realizes what her boyfriends intentions are and she can't help but scoff as she feels his lips fan against the back of her exposed neck. Drew kisses her shoulder while wrapping his arms around her hips, allowing his body to press against her in all the right places. He traces his lips up against her soft skin and y/n giggles, feeling his hot breath tickle against her neck as she leans back and feels his hardness from the instant contact of her lower back.

"What do you want then?" she asks, turning around in his hold, disregarding her half eaten sandwich.

"You're finally catching on?" he teases while gripping her hips between his large palms.

Y/n scowls at him making him chuckle and bite his lip as he watches her run her small hands up and down his torso. "Well, why didn't you just say so?"

Drew lets out a long huff and dips his head down towards her face level and presses his nose against hers, rutting his hips against hers in the process, causing y/n to let out a sharp breath. "Too many distractions." he groans before pressing his lips against hers forcefully.

Y/n's hands travel up towards his hair and griped onto the strands, earning a moan to escape her boyfriends lips. The way her body arched under his made him swell even more than he thought possible. The way her soft hands dug into his hair as they both explored each other's mouths with wonder like they haven't took in one another in a decade made the fire ignite in bottom of y/n's stomach, earning a whimper to escape from her now, red swollen lips.

Y/n's head fell back as Drew pushed her harder against the marble counter, his large hands gripping her hips in a addictive fashion. The thin fabric of her cotton shorts would be no match for the bruises she'd probably see tomorrow, but she didn't mind, she craved it as she felt him use his lips as a paint brush against the canvas of exposed skin. The sponges of kisses against her chest began to travel down, down, down her body and she sucked in a breath as she looked down to see her boyfriend drop to his knees, his face being level to her core.

"Not here." she croaked out, her hand flying to her chest in surprise as Drew smiled at how he's already got her mesmerized by his actions.

"C'mon, pretty girl."

Drew stands to his feet and chuckled as y/n immediately jumped into his arms eagerly. Wrapping her legs around him, causing him to let out a sharp inhale at the contact of her heat against his member. She swallows his sounds against her lips while he carefully maps out the way to the bedroom they shared. To their advantage, the bedroom was straight down the hall from the kitchen and with enough ease Drew managed to get the both of them behind the bedroom door without any hiccups. With smug satisfaction at the way y/n attacked his face and neck with sloppy kisses and teasing touches Drew let his girlfriend down onto her own feet and stood back to take in her presence.

"Thank God for no stairs." He says causing them to let laughter fill the bedroom as he gripped her shorts by his pointer finger, pulling her closer to him in the process.

"I can't believe you didn't trip or slam me into something." Y/n giggles making them both snort in remembrance of previous mishaps.

"Shut up!" Drew giggles as y/n watches him slide down her shorts, painfully slow causing her to press her lips together as they finally pool down at her feet.

She locks eyes with him as he backs her up towards the bed, a haunting smirk forming on his lips as he quickly pushed her onto the bed, a soft giggle falling from y/n as he crawls over her while she awkwardly shuffles towards the pillows. Blushes and bashfulness bubbling between them as Drew watched y/n's head fall back against the fluffy pillows.

"Come here" y/n pleads, clutching onto the back of his neck, forcing his lips onto hers greedily. Drew's body fits perfectly against y/n's and they both moan at the contact of his tongue finally meeting hers again causing Drew's hips to twist into hers, whimpers drown between the two of them. "P-please." she whines, her neck arching at the feeling of him pulse against the bottoms of her bikini.

Y/n's back arched painfully as Drew repeated his movements, the both of the gasping out as y/n gripped at his shoulders. "Please what?" he taunted as he roamed the palm of his hand against her chest, pinching her nipple earning a cry from y/n.

"Y-you know wh-what." she stuttered with her eyes snapped shut and her bottom lip between her teeth as she felt his hands drag down towards her bottoms. "Don't tease me." she snapped, feeling his ego pool around them.

Drew laughed as she opened her eyes and dug her nails into his shoulder blades, the sting making excitement jolt through his body before he decided to pull down her bottoms, throwing them across the room knowing that she'd have his head later for not being able to find them.

"I won't tease you." he finally said. "Not until you tell me what you want." he said darkly causing y/n to instinctively try and snap her legs shut at the raspiness of his voice causing his eyes to darken. "Speak." he ordered making y/n's legs give out from under her, her heat pulsing at each demanding word he spoke.

"I-" she sighed as her cheeks flushed under his hard gaze, "I- I want your mouth..." she let out an embarrassed chuckle.

Drew pressed his lips together noticing her lack of confidence, his hand traveling up her body and gripped her chin in his large hand, forcing her to look up at him. A smile in return made y/n's nerves quickly fade as she looked at her boyfriend who did nothing but adore her especially at her most vulnerable. "Where do you want my mouth?" he questioned lightly making y/n bite her lip and arch her hips against his. "Use your words baby." he said in amusement.

"I want your lips here." she whispered, gripping his hand a bringing it down towards her sex, Drew's mouth went agape as he watched her eyes roll back at the slight friction of his knuckles against her naked self. "I'm asking nicely." she said with excited eyes.

Without a word Drew pushed off of his elbows and crawled down against her, giggles filling the room once again as y/n watched him grip her curvy hips and trace his hands against her thighs and spread them open for him.

"Open for me pretty girl." His breath fanned against her bundle making her shiver and lay her hands on he head as she watched his eyes take in her state. Before she could even take another breath, Drew's lips hungrily found where she needed him most and her fingers dug into his hair painfully tight causing him to moan against her body.

The feeling of him vibrating against her caused y/n to let out a cry, her head falling to the side as her back arched against his lips while he explored her with gentle strokes of his tongue, her mind slipping away into pure bliss.

"Does that feel nice baby girl?" he groaned against her with flushed cheeks, his hunger finally being met as he tased her arousal.

"Yesyes!" y/n moaned not being able to breath in a pause as she felt his lips capture her bundle of nerves in ways that were villainous. "Don't stop, please let me-" she didn't even have the luxury of finishing her sentence as drew shoved her hips down back onto the mattress, hungrily finishing off what he had been craving all weekend long. The bedroom was now filled with moans that would make passerby's gawk and stop in surprise. Y/n didn't care, nor have the capacity to stop herself from the explosion of bliss she felt, her legs shaking as she felt her boyfriends palm rest against her mouth and encourage her to scream into his hand as he moved his other set of fingers into her entrance to allow, one, two, three fingers explore her in ways nobody ever could.

"Go ahead, I got you. I got you." he encouraged with words that dripped liked honey causing y/n's fire to burst, her back arching as her hand quickly moved to grip the duvet, her eyes snapping shut as waves thrashed around her, Drew's hand moving from her mouth to let her come undone as he gripped onto her hip and support her movements against his mouth, her noises dying into whimpers as she crashed against the mattress. "There you go, I told you I got you." he mused.

Pulling away from her center, y/n gulped at the loss of contact, her sleepy eyes opening to reveal her boyfriend crawling beside her now, his hand caressing her body as she smiled weakly at him. Drew's eyes filled will concern as she placed her hand against his bicep and nodded reassuringly. "Thank you." she whispered.

"You need anything?" he wondered.

"I'm perfect." she hummed happily.

Drew chuckles and leans towards y/n, kissing her lips tenderly earning a hum from y/n as she tastes herself on his lips. She moves her shaky hand towards the elastic of his swim trunks making him grip her hand as he sits up slowly. "It's okay, we can take a break." he says looking down at her.

"Are you sure?" she says running her hands up his arm tenderly.

Drew nods, bending down to retrieve a soft kiss, "Always." he promises. "Lets get you cleaned up, okay?" he nearly whispers as he stands from the bed and scoops y/n up into his arms, heading towards the ensuite as she let out soft giggles and thank you's.

"I can walk myself you know!" y/n chimed as he set her down on the tiled floor.

Drew flashed his bright smile her way as he turned on the hot water for the shower, kicking off his trunks and watching y/n slip off her top. "I like taking care of you though." he said cheekily, taking her hand and pulling her into the shower with him.

The two wincing at the satisfying warmth of the water. Y/n wrapped her arms around Drew as he grabbed the wash cloth and began cleaning her off, her cheeks tinted pink as she watched him lovingly.

"I don't think we're ever gonna go back to the beach if you keep treating me so good." y/n teased.

"I could go an extra round plus dessert." Drew winked.

[bokebelle]

connie springer + friends with benefits

A/N: this is very very self-indulgent and ended up being longer than intended but please enjoy my Connie brainrot bc i love him a lot and he needs more content

WARNINGS: 16+; friends with benefits relationship; mentions of sex; modern au

PAIRINGS: connie springer x gn!reader

TAGS: fluff, a tiny tiny bit of angst.

REQUESTS: open

One of the best people to get into a friends with benefits type of relationship 💯

You guys would have to be good friends before this kind of relationship happens. Connie may be fun and goofy from time to time but he wants to make sure you trust him as a partner and vice versa

He probably wasn't even looking for a fwb type relationship tbh it probably just happened and you guys just went with it

it probably started with growing sexual tension whenever you two hung out. A little playful flirting here and there 👀

At a party, you two were a little flirter than usual and he just looked around to see if anyone was around, and whispered in your ear if you wanted to make out in his car LMAO of course you agreed

things just escalated over time til he offered to take you home one night and you best believe he did NOT go home that night

When the post nut clarity finally hit that you guys hooked up, he just asks if you would want to do it again

Connie turned to look at you, lips slightly swollen, with a light dusting of pink on his cheeks and a light sheen of sweat on his chest. "So...wanna do it again?"

"Right now?!" you sit up, instantly feeling the soreness in your lower half. you definitely weren't ready for another round

"Not now, dummy. But maybe...whenever we both wanna, y'know..." he avoided looking at you, suddenly feeling embarrassed at his own proposition. "but if you totally don't want to, it's fine I understand."

A small smile dances on you lips. He looked cute all flustered, suddenly looking nervous when he was anything but just moments ago. "I think I'd like that."

You two don't really tell anyone, but you don't keep it a secret either. He'd tell them what's up if people would ask (if you wanted them to know) but since you guys flirt all the time no one really suspected anything more was going on

the longer your relationship progresses, the bolder he gets lmao literally went from being shy about asking to hookup in his apartment to dragging your ass you his car during a date because his dick "suddenly missed his best buddy" you smacked him

He is also very open to experimenting and trying new things. He'll try it once and if it doesn't work then it's fine. He also respects your boundaries if ever you don't feel comfortable with the idea of trying something new. he won pressure you and won't bring it up

Probably uses a safeword like "taco"

He isn't THAT rough that you'd need one, but he wants to give you the option of stopping whenever you feel like you can handle it 😭 this baby doesn't wanna hurt you and wants you as safe as possible 🥺

This man is a great mix of playful and serious in the bedroom. He knows when to make you laugh during sex and to tone it down when you just need a physical release. your comfort is his priority so he wants to make sure he fits whatever you need

Connie is actually really good with aftercare despite not knowing it's actually a thing!!

He just knows it's on him to take care of his partner afterwards so he helps you clean up, gives you clean clothes especially if you're at his place, and offers you a snack or asks if you wanna watch a movie

If you want to cuddle and just talk, he's totally down! if you also need some personal space, he'll totally respect that and give you the time you need, whenever you need it.

He can be a total flirt but he's also very friendly and knows his limits so he doesn't end up sending mixed signals. He's flirty enough to keep things interesting but not enough to confuse either of you about your relationship unless he falls for you.

Great aftercare? Attentive in the bedroom? Funny, handsome, respectful king? overall one of the best people to have a FWB relationship hands down

If you ever decide you want to end that kind of setup, he'll totally respect it and would still treat you as a good friend! will occasionally make inside jokes about hooking up but it's all in good nature because he enjoyed his time with you and he wants you to remember that time with the same smile he has whenever he thinks about it pls i love him

BONUS: Falling in love with Connie during your FWB relationship (and him falling in love you with back)

honestly how can you not fall for him

Connie is always so sweet, funny, respectful, both in and out of the bedroom so it wasn't long before you started wanting to stay in his arms a bit more after a good session

Connie never treated you any differently, but there were times when things just felt different

The moment you knew you had feelings for him was when he fucked you differently compared to your previous sessions

Sure he would blow your back out every now and then, but there were also more mellow times with him when you both were feeling lazy and needy

But THIS was a new experience. He fucked you slowly, but intensely. His hands were all over you but his touches were more gentle and soft. His kisses were a little bit sweeter and the caresses on your face lingered just a bit longer.

You snuggled into his chest a little more after that and you swore he held you a bit tighter, pulling your body just a bit closer to his. When you became aware of his heart beating under your ear, and found yourself being lulled to sleep by it, you knew you were fucked both literally and figuratively

Your feelings for him weighed you down more and more until you decided you were playing a dangerous game and you had to get out before you reached the point of no return

it sucked having to break things off with Connie but it was the first rule of any fwb relationship and you broke it more and more everyday.

As you sat up and rolled out of bed, ready to get dressed and leave, you felt Connie's arms come up behind you and rested his chin against your shoulder.

"Hey, why don't you stay the night?" he asked, placing a quick kiss on the junction between your neck and shoulder.

You exhale heavily, dreading what was coming next. You didn't plan on breaking it off so soon, but you knew staying the night would only be the wrong choice to make - for your sake and your heart's.

"I don't think that's a good idea."

"C'mon, this isn't the first time you've stayed the night. Please?" You wanted to give in. You wanted to roll around, kiss his pretty face and spend the night in his arms. But knowing he didn't feel the same way as you did, knowing you'd leave with a heart that would break a little bit more if you stayed over, is what made you say no.

"It's not a good idea, Connie." you take a deep breath. "Actually, I think we aren't a good idea anymore."

You felt him withdraw his arms from your torso, the areas where he held you instantly feeling cold and empty. You hold on tighter to the sheets, partly to cover yourself up but mostly to keep you from breaking down in front of him.

"What?! Why not? Did I do something wrong? Was I too rough?"

Connie desperately racked his brain for what could have gone wrong from when you were saying his name like a prayer to now. He didn't want to mess it up with you, he really didn't. You slowly became someone he felt safe with. You became the one he wanted to see first thing in the morning, that's why he wanted you to stay over. He was falling for you, but he didn't want to admit it just yet. Maybe you caught on and didn't feel the same way? He knew he'd have to tell you eventually, but he wanted to be selfish a little bit longer. He wanted to enjoy what you guys had before going back to being just friends with no 'benefits'.

"I know we agreed to being just friends but I think I'm starting to feel something more than that and it's really stupid. But I don't think I can do this anymore without falling for you more than I already have." The tension in the air is palpable. In the time it takes for what you said to finally sink in Connie's mind, you decided his silence was his final answer.

When Connie saw your figure quietly get up from the edge of the bed, he knew this was his chance.

He quickly made his way over to your side, sitting on the edge. He reached out and gently wrapped his arms around your waist.

"Don't go, please." He whispered into the skin of your back.

You turn to look at him, keeping your tears at bay, trying to pry his arms off of you. God, with the way he was looking at you, that was almost all the convincing you need to stay just last night with him

"Connie, don't make this harder on me. You don't understa-"

"No, [y/n]" he cuts you off, now moving his hands to hold yours. "you don't understand." he delicately presses a kiss to your fingertips before kissing the back of your hand. "I want you. I want you to stay."

The meaning behind his words lit a spark in you that erupted into a passionate flame in your chest.

Connie wanted you. He wanted you just as much as you wanted him.

You cup his face, one of his hands coming up to rest over yours. You lean down and place the sweetest, softest kiss you can on his lips. It's not much but you hope he can feel all you've wanted to tell him in that one kiss.

"Okay, Connie, okay" you whisper as your lips pulled away from his own, a small smile forming when he whined at the loss of contact.

You committed the image of Connie Springer pouting at you because he wanted a kiss to your memory. You would tease him about it soon enough, you just wanted cherish the fact that he wanted kisses - your kisses.

You had more nights to share, more kisses to give him, but for now you just wanted to enjoy the feeling of having Connie in your arms, knowing you had each other as long as your hearts wanted.

You wanted to enjoy the feeling of Connie simply being there, finally being yours. He wasn't going anywhere, and neither were you.

"I'll stay."

[wonthingz]

Only for you. | Jeon Wonwoo.

pt2!! here's pt1 ->

• so you both parted ways bc duh u both don't live in the same house

• once wonwoo reached his house, he heads to his bedroom immediately. he grabs his phone and hesitates if he should make the call or not.

• " no wonwoo not this again shit " he thought

• it isn't the first time wonwoo felt weird when it came to girl ( you duH ) the first time he did, made him feel like a complete fool as the girl rejected him in front of the whole school

• she kinda lowered wonwoo'e self esteem even more which led him to becoming who he is now :((

• wonwoo had one friend during the whole process of him asking the girl out, it was yoon jeonghan but sadly he moved away

• wonwoo wanted to make a phone call to him,,, his and jeonghan's contact never faded despite jeonghan moving away so it kinda calmed wonwoo to know that somebody would be there for him

• the boy shook his head to clear his thoughts and pressed jeonghan's name on his contact list.

• " hello? wonwoo? "

• " ah hyung, hello. "

• " hi wonu, how are you? "

• wonu, it felt nice for him to hear that name again.

• " i'm okay hyung, how about you? "

• " i'm doing great! is there something you need? "

• " hyung,, there's this girl who wants to befriend me or smth and i don't want things to end up like you know who "

• " wonu, just because some girl wants to be your friend doesn't mean you both will end up having feelings for eachother "

• " yeah but hyung you know me "

• " give it a chance wonwoo, you'll barely find someone who's sincere in making a friendship with you. "

• " okay hyung, i will thank you. i miss you. "

• " i miss you too wonu-ya. "

• that nickname made wonu smile once again uwu isn't he a soft baby

• he puts the phone down before taking his books out and doing his homework,, people knew for a fact that though jeon wonwoo's a delinquent, he didn't take his studies for granted.

• so like the next day when u dasi run run run to your school bECAUSE U WERE LATE ONCE AGAIN BC U STAYED UP ALMOST THE WHOLE NIGHT ON THE PHONE WITH VERNON, CHAN, SEUNGKWAN AND JUN TALKING ABOUT HOW SEUNGKWAN FELL DOWN

• it's ur second time being late to class and you didn't even dress up properly today so once u enter ur classroom everyone once again just stared at you

• " ah, did you wake up late once again? " mr. hong spoke up. you just nodded, too tired to even answer him properly before sitting back down on your seat

• you felt a tap on your shoulder so u looked back to see who it was and damn hi kim mingyu

• " you alright? " he asked, he looked concerned sweetie.

• you just nodded in return, " yep i am thanks hehe. " you say before turning back to mr. hong

• once the class ended u were starting to feel a bit scared as your next class with with wonwoo

• " hey, my friends and i are going to this skate park later as seungcheol wanted to try it out. maybe you and your friends can tag along, i'll tell vernon. " mingyu says, popping out of nowhere before he leaves the classroom

• you just shrugged bc u were unsure if you wanted to go. one, you didn't really know them and two, jeon wonwoo's there but you knew that your boys loved skating so there was still a huge possibility of u going

• you head out the classroom and to your next class. you step inside seeing how wonwoo was already there and once again, reading a book.

• you sat down on your seat, " hi! " you say

• the dude just looks at you and points to himself, " me? ". you rolled your eyes and nodded, " yeah you. "

• " uh hi "

• the class ended with the both of u not saying another word to eachother

• ngl,, wonwoo actually wanted to have a conversation with you but he was shy and he didn't know what to say which irritated him

• it was finally lunch time and you felt your stomach grumble so you ran through the hallway seeing jun in front of you.

• " junnie!! " you call out before grabbing his arm and running to the cafeteria. you saw vernon, chan, seungkwan and,,,, mingyu and his friends, all in one table

• you sat down beside vernon who was beside mingyu and you leaned in to vernon's ear, " why are they here? "

• vernon smiled at you, " they invited us to go to the skate park later, we should all go "

• " ah shit " was all you thought of as chan's big mouth opened

• " i heard y/n and wonwoo are classmates? " he asked, making wonwoo look up from his meal and raise an eyebrow

• " o-oh yeah we're both in the same literature class " you say,, knowing wonwoo wouldn't speak up about it

• chan looked at the boy, he knew something was up so he wanted to make him speak. he saw the tension in wonwoo's eyes

• " so how is it being classmates with y/n? "

• the boy didn't answer at first,,, he kinda stared at chan for a while before he did, " she says hi to me often that's it "

• seungkwan and chan started teasing the both of you which made u absolutely embarrassed i mean sis u were like a tomato

• " so uh,, to the skate park later huh? " soonyoung changes the topic,,, he was wonwoo's closest friend and he sensed how awkward this must be for him

• " yep! " seungkwan says excitedly before the bell rings, signaling that it was time for classes once again.

• time skip owo

• as school was finally over,, you got a message from vernon that everyone agreed to meet up by the school gate so you hurried ur way there

• as soon as you got there, wonwoo looked at you walking towards them but instantly looked away as you looked at him

• " let's go? " vernon asks, everybody agreed so yall yeeted your way to the skate park

• everybody was having fun skating while you and wonwoo were by the bleachers just watching them have fun. you didn't know how to skate and wonwoo was just too shy to do so in front of you

• wonwoo took out a book from his bag but before he even opened a page you spoke up

• " so i see you're into books "

• the guy slowly looked at you before clutching the book in his hands

• " uh yeah "

• " since when? "

• " it's my only escape, my way of coping with things is reading. "

• you were kinda surprised how this guy kinda opened smth about himself to you but you didn't let that show

• the boy cleared his throat before speaking again, " about yesterday,, does it not weird you out to see a delinquent interested in books? "

• " i found it kinda weird at first actually but hey,, everyone has their own likings and dislikings. "

• wonwoo smiled slightly, he was kinda grateful that you were so understanding but it kinda weirded him out how you weren't afraid of him

• both of you jumped as seungkwan's jacket was thrown at wonwoo's hands making him drop his book

• " hEY YOU, THOUGH WE AREN'T CLOSE COME JOIN US LEAVE Y/N THERE SHE CAN'T SKATE " seungkwan shouted before running off

• you bend down to pick up the book that fell not knowing wonwoo did the same so the cliche thing happened of both of your hands touching

• but it made you feel weird because you felt a connection,,, you wondered if he felt the same

• he did tbh

• you picked up the book and handed it over to him, " uh here hehe. "

• " thanks " he mumbled, dusting the invisible dust off the book. you smiled in return.

• " yeah no prob! " you say before feeling your hand being dragged and you turned to your side to see chan

• you'd be lying to yourself if you say you didn't feel anything earlier, you just kinda stared at wonwoo as u were being dragged away by this boy

• lez fast forward to after the game heh

• owcakes so,,, y'all go home and mingyu and wonwoo were left to chat about a couple things. it was breezy at that place so they both didn't really mind.

• " hey,,, what was that with y/n earlier? " mingyu says, completely seeing how puzzled wonwoo was

• " uh.. what? what are you talking about? " wonwoo asked, obviously he knew what mingyu was talking about but he was embarrassed enough

• " both of you were sitting here practically gushing at each other, it was disgusting. " mingyu joked, making the older playfully punch his chest.

• " i don't know man, it feels weird. " wonwoo replied to him, immediately playing with his fingers. mingyu frowned because he knew what wonwoo was talking about.

• " weirder than what happened with anna? "

• " yes, weirder. "

• wonwoo got up and grabbed his book, he smiled at mingyu before walking home

• mingyu knew it was time for wonwoo to man up about his feelings and he absolutely knew what to do

• it was finally saturday and it meant, of course, no school. you were on your bed just scrolling through your phone before you got a text from a unknown number.

• " hey, it's mingyu, i just wanted to know if you'd like to grab lunch with me at mcdonalds? "

• ?¿?¿?¿?¿?¿??????¿¿¿¿

• yep, that's exactly how your mind went. you quickly replied, " how'd you get my number? ".

• " vernon gave it to me, so u up? "

• you sighed. yesterday, wonwoo and now mingyu. you typed a quick, " yep okay. " before getting up from your bed and tossing your phone over ur shoulder and what stressed u out more was that u didn't even know what to wear.

• but by the end of it u just chose to go with some shorts and a hoodie. you quickly put ur shoes on before dashing out the door to head to mcdonalds,,, it was the one near your school and you knew for a fact that this was the mcdonalds mingyu was talking about.

• as you stepped in the establishment, you mentally facepalmed yourself as mingyu " forgot " to mention that he was bringing wonwoo with him. mingyu flashed you a smile and you sat down with them.

• " i'm surprised you aren't pushing me away,,, it's different from what i've heard about you. " you say to them,, like what? it's true.

• " yeah, we enjoy your company and as well as vernon's, chan's, seungkwan's and jun's. wonwoo enjoys your company the best. " mingyu teased, nudging wonwoo slightly, making the older fix his glasses.

• " hi y/n. i'm glad you came. " he muttered, you showed him a smile before a tray literally has been placed flat in front of you. you furrowed your eyebrows and looked at mingyu, " but... i haven't ordered yet? "

• " vernon told us you love their chicken here the most so wonwoo bought you the meal so you wouldn't have to wait. "

• " oh? "

• you looked at wonwoo who was blushing immensely yet he tried his best to hide it. you giggled and smiled at wonwoo, " thanks so much. "

• " you're welcome "

• so blah blah blah the 3 of u decided to eat and talk about things in ur life until mingyu held your hand that was laying on the table and u went HANNSSKK?????

• wonwoo glanced over at the both of u and u saw him do so,,, but he kept his cool and continued eating

• " hey y/n let's hang out after this, wonwoo has to head to the library after so i'm sure he won't mind. "

• wonwoo looked at mingyu, raising his eyebrow, kinda questioning in his head why would mingyu do such a thing after what they talked about last night.

• mingyu nudged the older boy, " oh uh yeah go ahead " he mumbled

• the decision left was only yours and you decided to say yes, maybe it could take wonwoo off your mind

• after you three ate, mingyu stood up and grabbed his jacket that was set on his chair. he looked at you and smiled and u smiled back,, but you couldn't help but glance at wonwoo to see his reaction

• " so shall we go? " mingyu asked you, casually placing an arm around your shoulder. wonwoo just looked at it without much reaction,,, you frowned a little

• you nodded at mingyu, " yep let's go " you say, heading out the fast food chamber with him, leaving wonwoo behind

• to sum it up, you and mingyu strolled around the park but funny his phone kept buzzing from time to time and it kinda bothered you how you didn't have like a proper convo with him without his phone getting in the way

• the next day mingyu once again texted you,, asking if you could hang out again. a part of you wanted to refuse but it'd be embarrassing especially since he's in this gang and he could harm you but you didn't think mingyu would be able to do that to you so you just agreed

• you sighed,,, did you really like wonwoo? did it hurt you that wonwoo didn't react much? does wonwoo like you back?

• a billion questions were running in your head and ngl you were very confused

• you grabbed your laptop and decided to talk to vernon, maybe he could help clear your head up

• " hey? "

• chwe vernon is now online

• " yeah? "

• " can you help me w smth? "

• " yeah? what is it? "

• " sigh,, i think i have a crush "

• " huh? is it jun? "

• " what no.. he's part of the delinquents "

• " oh damn,, is it gyu? "

• " no,,, it's wonwoo "

• " do u want me to go talk to him for you? "

• " no, please. i just don't know how to get rid of these feelings "

• " hey, y/n remember that the more you try to get rid of them,, the stronger they become. so just relax and let things flow on their own, okay? "

• you smiled, vernon always knew the right words to say

• " thanks sm, ily bro "

• " ily too "

• chwe vernon is now offline

• and with that, you fell asleep

• you woke up to the sound of birds chirping out your window, it's a sunday so you remembered about the hang out thing you were going to with mingyu

• you checked your phone and you saw that mingyu texted you an hour ago

• " meet me at the library,,, 1:30pm! "

• it was 12pm and you didn't want to be late so you started taking a shower, eating and changing your clothes

• time flew by quickly and it was finally 1:15pm. you were on your way to the library now. you clutched your phone in your hand tightly not wanting it to be snatched by anyone

• you entered the library and see nobody,,, you furrowed your eyebrows as you expected to see at least a couple people

• the door opens behind you, you hoped it was mingyu but you thought wrong

• as you turned around, a tall boy with brown hair and specs entered the library... wonwoo?

• " uh hey,, " you greeted him, he smiled slightly and waved at you. his smile warmed your heart.

• " uh, is mingyu with you? " you asked, looking behind him, " he told me we'd hang out today "

• the boy raised an eyebrow, fixing his specs, " what? mingyu's at his house, sleeping. "

• your eyes widen a little, shit you thought that maybe vernon told mingyu and if this was mingyu's idea to set you and wonwoo up then maybe he messed up

• but you were right, mingyu did set you two up

• " oh, okay heh. " you say, wonwoo passed by you and headed to the place he'd always sit at, you decided to follow him there and take a seat beside him

• " mind if i join you? " you asked, wonwoo slowly looked up at you before shaking his head, " go sit. "

• you smiled at him and grabbed a book that was already on the table, you flipped through a couple pages and decided to read a little

• you were kinda bored with the book you chose so you decided to get another one, as you were reaching for the book you accidentally touched wonwoo's hand as he tried to reach for the same book

• " uh,, are you going to read that? " he asked

• you nodded, " but if you're going to use it then it's fine! " he shook his head, " you can go read it "

• wonwoo shakes his head, " actually i've read it before. it's a great story. ".

• you furrowed your eyebrows and grab the book, wiping away some of the dust on it. you realized, it's a love story. you face wonwoo and showed him the book, " what's the story of this? ".

• he looks at you then at the book, " well, it's about a cowardly boy who had trouble expressing his feelings to the girl he likes. " he mumbles, continuing to write on a piece of paper while reading his book.

• you just nodded, your lips in a thin line. " i see. " you say, opening the book yet the first thing that caught your eye were random sticky notes on the pages.

• " she looked so pretty today. "

• " mingyu's such a dumbass. ".

• " we touched hands. i don't know how to feel. ".

• your eyebrows furrowed, immediately looking at wonwoo to see him already looking at you.

• " uh,, so who's the lucky girl? " you asked, flipping the pages as you didn't want things to seem awkward.

• " you. "

• yoUR ENTIRE WORLD LITERALLY SHUT DOWN LIKE HELLO? THE JEON WONWOO LIKES YOU? YOU COULDNT EVEN PROCESS IT.

• " me? " you ask, pointing to yourself, only to make wonwoo nod.

• " but why me? " you asked, a bit confusED BUT VERY FLATTERED.

• " well, just because you're cute and you know, you're you. " he mumbles, closing his books. he stands up and reaches his hand out.

• you didn't know what to say so you just stared at him, no words could even leave your mouth as you tried to process everything.

• " so, y/n, do you wanna go out and grab some food with me? call it a date? ".

• yOU WANTED TO SCREAM,,,, OF COURSE YOU WANTED TO SAY YES LIKE HELLO?

• you nodded at him and smiled, getting up from your seat and taking his hand. the both of you exiting the library together.

• the boys were bewildered and mingyu couldn't be any more happier for the both of you.

• and as for your friends, well, they questioned it but ended up loving wonwoo in the end.

AAAA IM SO SORRY FOR THE DELAY AND FOR HOW SHITTY THIS IS I CANT EVEN FATHOM

[bemybstar]

(Minor spoilers for episode 7 or 8 i don't remeber) Pls....i crave angst, if you'd be so kind, basically, I'm a slut for one (1) eagle and one eagle only and could you please write about Aoba's S/O going missing during the blackout in the Meteor festifal, like, no where to be found missing? (Will they be found? Are they dead, alive? You can decide that)

A/N: Since I finished the anime I don’t really mind spoilers but I’d be down to write for Aoba. Thanks for requesting this! Inbox is open and feedback is appreciated!

Pairing: Aoba x Fem!Bird!Reader

“Hey Y/N!” You hear your boyfriend, Aoba call out to you during a ten minute break from rehearsal. You excuse yourself from your friend group and head over to him.

“Yes?” You ask please to hear why he was so eager to grab your attention. “Are you planning to help set up for the meteor festival this week?”

“Of course!” You exclaim. “It’s not everyday we get to go outside and see the city so I’m very excited to see how things turn out. Are you?” He responses with a similar answer as you hear him out. During drama club you had to keep the PDA to a minimum since he was on the actors team and you were part of stage design. Neither of you wanted to risk anything since club priorities came first.

Just then Louis appeared which meant it was time to get back to work. “Well I better get going,” Aoba says pointing back to the stage. “Have to work on my lines with the rest of the guys.”

“Well, good luck. I know you’ll do great!” You encourage him before waving off and go back to your friends who were waiting on you to finish some designs.

The following day preparation for the meteor festival was well under way. The morning rountine was a complete success thanks to every animal willing to do their part. But night fall was approaching which meant it was time to head back to the academy and continue where everyone left off tomorrow.

You were busy cleaning up supplies with Juno, who was kind enough to help you after your friends left early. After you both were finally done you noticed Juno spotted Legosi from afar, she excused herself and headed off to which you didn’t mind. You knew she had a massive crush on the shy lonesome wolf since word gets around in drama club. Since you were all alone you had decided it was time to take your leave and catch up with the rest of the drama department.

But before you could reach them everything went pitch black in an instant. Since you weren’t nocturnal you didn’t have the advantage of guiding yourself through the dark. All you hear were frantic footsteps and fearful shrikes of animals who you assumed were all herbivores. Considering what’s been going on lately, you understood why. You weren’t ready to become someone’s next meal... you just hoped everyone from the drama club thought the same.

“How many members came today?” Bill asked the group when suddenly Aoba gasped remembering you weren’t in the circle with them as your name passed through his mouth like a whisper. “I have somewhere to be! Take care of everyone until I get back!” Was all Aoba mentioned before he took off hoping to find you safe and unharmed.

“Y/N... I hope your okay,” He told himself as he searched for where he last saw you with Juno but with no luck you were still no where to be found. Aoba knew he couldn’t give up on himself, on you for that matter... he knew he had to try no matter the cost.

“Ugh!” He groans under pressure. “Y/N! Where are you?!”

“Aoba?” You hear him call out from where you’ve been hiding. “I-Is that really you?”

“Yes!” He calls out once more. “Keep talking. I’ll follow the sound of your voice to try and find you,” he informs as you do just that. It felt unbelievable that he would go through all this trouble just for your own well being but you must have been more valuable to him than you realized if you meant all that much to him.

Suddenly you hear the snap of a twig approach closer towards your direction. You were about to run away when you trip over your feet and fall straight into somebody’s arms... that’s when the lights decided to make their appearance once again.

You open your eyes and it’s revealed to be Aoba who has you in his care. “Thank goodness your not hurt,” he cries out as you gaze up to meet his worrisome face from almost losing you.

“I’m okay,” you reply. “Thanks to you,” you tell him and stare back at him lovingly. “Well you know I can’t let anything bad happen to my girlfriend. I don’t know what I do if-“ you cut him off by shutting his beak with your finger.

“Don’t finish that sentence and just kiss me already!” He does just that as you shift closer to his chest, holding you from the back in a caressing manner.

“Hey!” You both stop and hear Bill’s voice ruin your heartfelt moment. “Are you Love Bird’s done yet? We have to head back to campus before something else bad happens!”

“Love birds?” Your boyfriend says in confusion. “I actually like the sound of that. It’s cute, don’t you think?” you respond cheerfully and he agrees.

Love birds, huh? You could get use to that...

———

Tag list - (just ask to be added)

@starr60

[trouvelle]

I love all your Heizuha contents!!!! Oneshots, drabbles, etc (memes too lol). And your ANGST FICS???? I'M DESTROYED. Just curious, if you are accepting requests, can you write happy shinran and heizuha oneshot? I need something to heal from your angsty AUs 😢😢😢😢💦💦

Hi hello thank you so much 🥺 AH YES HEIZUHA I’m HEART-EYES FOREVER 😍!! My hot-blooded Kendo boi and his Aikido (and Karuta) queen ugh they make me feel so soft. Wait—don’t be destroyed pls omg I have a shinran oneshot first for you right here! And yes it actually is a happy one. Although I gotta say I’m probably even worse at doing happy sappy fluff. But still, I hope you like this! ❤️❤️

Fandom: Detective Conan/DCMK Pairing: Shinichi/Ran Rating: G Genre/Tags: Romance, Fluff Summary: Ran hates being apart from Shinichi. All she wants is to feel his warmth next to her. 

•

Ran is happy to be with Shinichi, even if it means not being physically together and having to survive long distance.

Now she would be lying if she says it doesn’t bother her in the slightest. After they got together and she finds out that Shinichi still has to leave for his ongoing case, her initial thought is that it wouldn’t bother her. She’s grown so used to it by now. It’s not like he’s never coming back, because he always does. After all, they just started dating, and maybe this way they’ll still be in their honeymoon stage for years to come.

They have been doing alright with frequent calls and texts sent to each other. Although she is slightly upset that they can’t physically go out on any dates, hearing Shinichi’s voice always makes everything worth it. She knows she’s going to forget all this as soon as she sees him again.

She does expect Shinichi to be as sad and lonely as she is, but she never asks about it. She doesn’t want him to think that she’s already turning clingy after only a few months into their relationship. And because she is an understanding girlfriend, she never tells him how she feels about it. She has been saying “I love you” more often though, now that she’s more comfortable saying it, which he always happily returned. She never once doubts Shinichi either—he gives her zero reasons to. Besides, they have short meet ups every now and then, and those feel like they are enough for her.

There are certain things that leaves her feeling an extra amount of longing. When she sees couples out and about in the streets, or strolling around the park, or fooling around in the hallway of their school, it breaks her heart a little. She wants Shinichi by her side, to be able to cuddle into his warmth. She wants to walk next to him and hold his hand, to go to the movies and check out cute restaurants.

“I miss you,” Ran mumbles into her mic, only one side of her earphones on. She is lying on her bed, on a call with her boyfriend who is still away, on yet another case. She has to cherish all their calls together because time is all she can afford.

She traces her finger on her phone’s screen, outlining his name that’s currently displayed, yearning to touch him. She can't help but feel disappointed when all she can feel is how hot her phone is. She should probably get a new phone soon. 

“I miss you too. More than words can describe,” Shinichi replies guiltily, sad that Ran is so troubled. He has been trying to ease her pain by sneaking away to call her more often these days. He sees the longing in her eyes, always wondering what he can do for her. He hates it, hates seeing Ran’s face contort into sadness and what seems like disappointment. It never gets any easier. 

If only she knows that they are actually together literally every single day.

“Anyway, how is your day?” Shinichi asked, trying to change the subject to distract her. 

Ran huffs. “Conan-kun left on a weekend camping trip with his class. I’m worried about his safety. They’re elementary students, they’re not supposed to go camping in the mountains yet!”

Shinichi smiles fondly. Yep, he’s definitely on his camping trip all right.

“Also, it is kind of lonely here when he’s not around.” Lonelier, she adds to herself.

“You have nothing to worry about, I’m sure he’ll be okay,” Shinichi reassures, grinning.

“I suppose it’s true. Conan-kun does know how to take care of himself. What are you doing, anyway? Do you have to go soon? Can we switch to video call?” The hope in her voice is unmistakable. He purposely ignores Ran’s questions while wrecking his brain for a believable excuse to not switch to video call. But it is too late, she has already pressed the button that requested for him to accept the call.

Uh oh.

Shinichi curses silently. As soon as their cameras are on, he raises his phone up close to his face, careful to leave the streetlights out of view. “Hi!,” he says, hoping she wouldn’t detect the nervousness in his voice. Ran squints at the blurry screen. She can’t see much, but it is enough to make her whole evening better.

“You know what, Shinichi? It’s okay, you’re probably busy and tired, I understand! Have a good night or morning, wherever you are, okay?” Ran yawns, turning to lie on the other side as she reaches out to switch off her table lamp. “I’m already getting ready for bed anyway. Please stay safe out there. I love you.” 

“NO!” Shinichi yells, before realizing how loud and unnecessary it is. He stops to look around, praying that no one around him is affected by the noise he is making. Ran is decently surprised. “Shinichi, what’s wrong?”

“I, uh, I’m staking out a criminal’s possible hideout. It’s really boring here because nothing is happening so far and it’s probably deserted. Keep me me while I wait?” Shinichi asks sheepishly, belatedly realizing how dumb of an excuse he just gave. Is it even believable in the slightest? “I’m just walking around the place now,” He adds as he quickened his pace. 

Ran yawns but he can see her nodding her head in the dark. “Don’t you have to be aware of your surroundings, though? What if the bad guys creep up on you?”

“You’re right,” he says half-heartedly, not really paying attention to what she’s saying anymore. He’s trying to climb up the stairs as fast as his feet can take him. He is so close.

Ran mumbles something sleepily in return. How she wishes for body heat, but she only had her blanket to make up for the warmth. She closes her eyes, unaware that the line has gone silent. After a few more beats of silence, she hears the front door being unlocked. She sits up, suddenly alert and forgetting about her call with Shinichi. It is definitely not her father, since she can hear his snores very audibly from his room. Is it Conan, coming back from his camping trip a few days early? But—it’s literally the middle of the night, so if it actually is Conan, he has some explaining to do. She tip-toes to the door just to get ready in case it is an actual robber.

As the door unlocks and the intruder enters, Ran’s eyes widen and her hand flails around for the switch to turn one of the lights one as she recognizes the familiar silhouette. It can't be.

“Surprise.” Shinichi is standing there, smiling widely at the sight of his dumbfounded girlfriend.

Ran stares at the boy in front of her for a good while before reaching out for him in a frenzy. “You’re kidding,” she chokes out, wrapping her arms tightly around him, afraid he will be gone again as soon as she let go. 

“I’ve missed you too,” Shinichi sighs, hugging Ran back just as tight. They stand like that, hugging at the door silently, choosing to ignore the fact that her father can very well walk out of his room at any given moment. Shinichi pulls away, frowning, when he realizes that she is crying.

“Hey, don’t cry.” He whispers softly, bending his knees to look at Ran who has her head down. She shakes her head, opting to bury her face in his chest instead. Shinichi run his hands up and down her back, gently kissing the top of her head. “Don’t cry, I’m here.”

Ran looks up, a few droplets of tears streaming down her face. “That’s exactly why I’m crying! You’re back now, for.. God knows how long, and then you’re gonna have to leave me again. Probably in a few hours, or in the morning if we’re lucky,” she cries, sniffling. “I’ve missed you so much.”

Shinichi remains quiet as Ran cries her heart out in silence. Then, he very gently lifts her up, carrying her to the bedroom and setting her down on the bed. “Actually, I have a few days to spend with you.”

“Wh-what do you mean?”

“I mean, you’re right. And I’m not gonna lie to you, I will have to leave again, but not until Monday. So.. I’m yours for the whole weekend.” Shinichi says, hoping for her acceptance, despite how little he is offering her right now.

“The whole weekend?” Her smile is back on her face at this point. Sounds like she will just have to make the most out of this weekend, then. It’s a good thing she doesn’t have anything yet planned. She wipes the tears off of her face. She can’t waste their time together by crying like this. “Oh Shinichi, there are so many places that I wanted to go with you to!”

“We can go anywhere you want,” says Shinichi. That already sounds perfect to him. Truth be told, any moments spent with Ran were perfect. The Where and What weren’t all that important. Like right now. Even in the dim light, he can see how bright she’s smiling. God, all he wanted to do is stare at her and admire her beauty, amongst everything else.

He hates lying to Ran, although it is done to protect her, to shield her. He will have to lie to her some more, but this time, he does not want to make any more promises he can't keep. “It will all be over soon, I promise. I’ll come home for good.” You’re my home, he wants to say.

She has missed him so much—she missed his voice, his scent, his warmth, his presence. She crawls towards him, unable to hide the overwhelming sense of hope that arises after his declaration. “Really?”

“Really.” Ran can feel the tears welling up again. This time, out of happiness. “It hurts so much to not be able to be by your side.”

“I’m here,” murmurs Shinichi quietly as he reaches out to wipe some of her fallen tears away with the pad of his thumb. “... and I’m always watching.” he adds quietly, wrapping an arm around her as he hugs her to sleep.

Ran nods in silence. She has so many things to tell him, but she is content with just enjoying his warmth and presence beside her for now. Truly, nothing can compare to the homey feeling and the familiarity of being next to Shinichi. She lets him hold her to sleep, his voice a lullaby that carries her out of consciousness.

“I’m always with you,” he whispers, leaning down to kiss her forehead, “There’s nowhere I’d rather be.”

[jean-does-not-have-a-horseface]

A Little Game (Father!Levi)

Single parent au anon where you at fam?💖 This turned from bubbly happy fluff to moody painful angst real quick! Sorry... Idk I was crying while writing it..

I should probably tag @salty-levi because they said they wanna see more of parent Levi and I'm here to deliver. I promise next thing I'm gonna write will be FLUFF PURE FLUFF SO DONT ABANDON ME AND MY SAD FICS!

~~~

Levi's body falls down on the fresh grass, his head soflty landing down, in order to avoid any injury. His eyes are squinted and there's a wide smile on his face, a sign of happiness that's adorning his features. The sound of loud, little laughters filled his ears like bells that rang in a beautiful tone of freedom, while little vibrations that emitted from the voices made it to his chest.

By lifting his head just a tad, he was able to spot all three of his little ones sprawled all over his chest, laughing off of any sound they could hear echoiching in his body. Their small, dark haired heads are turned in a way they could all face each other, to compete about who's doing better in their little game.

"I can hear daddy's heart!"

"And I can hear his stomach!"

"I can hear your voices so shut up!"

Levi laughs sincerely at that, his voice sounding so soft, coming from the depths of his neck. His middle one had always been a little more vulgar than the others as this seemed to be the way he could try and imitate his father. His hands came to rest in his children's backs, holding them down and closer to him, as if to gesture then to just relax for one bit. And they do obviously, but the silence doesn't last long.

Kuchel's head jolts upwards, a little hand reaching to brush some strands of her bangs away from her forehead. "I wanna hide and seek!" Another head pops up, this one belonging to Tony, whose face shows how delighted he is by his sister's idea. "Yes yes yes papa! Can we play!?"

It's only Kurt who doesn't lift his head from his father's embrace and Levi seems to ignore it, looking delighted as well that his kids want to play hide and seek with him. It's not that often that he has a chance to play with them, given the fact that he's in the military. His kids don't lack on anything, they never miss playing around in the yard of the beautiful house he's built for them with the lady he's paying to take care of them, but it's killing him to know that he can't be there for them all the time. They only have him in this world and he only needs one more year until he can finally request to retire, so he can always be with them.

"I want to play a different game." Kurt says in a monotone, small voice that keeps reminding Levi of his mother. "Let's describe each other's faces."

Kuchel and Tony don't seem to bother with postponing their game of hide and seek as they agree with their older brother. They've played this game before, but never with their dad, just because they wanted to help Kuchel draw their little family.

"Alright I go first!" Kuchel laughs off and closes her eyes with her small hands. Levi's smiling again as he runs his hand through her jet black hair, picking up some dirt and leaves that have gathered at certain parts, due to her placing chopped flowers on it at first chance she gets. "Hmm, he has dark hair, a small nose and thiiiiiin lips and he always screams when daddy tells him to have a hair cut! And he always talks blah blah blah. Ahhhhhh"

Kuchel falls down laughing and screaming as her brother attackes her, tickling her sides for sweet revenge, yet Kurt seems too bored by the picture of this. "You're supposed to make it hard Kou! It's obvious you're talking about Tony!"

Kurt doesn't get to describe anyone until his turn, and as almost always he's left last, his siblings mocking the fact that there's no one else to be described except for himself, but he's so determined to describe the person in his head more than anything in the whole world.

"Oi, are you going to play?" His father says and his arm wraps around his small shaking frame. Levi can sense the kid is shaking, although he doesn't really know why and he's ready to address this matter until Kurt finally covers his eyes and opens his mouth to speak. "The person I'm talking about has (h/c) hair and (e/c) eyes. Her hair is waving in the wind and her smile is really pretty." Levi looks at him, confused. He can't be talking about his sister that a given fact, but he's not talking about his nanny either.

"She's holding a baby in her arms and shes waving daddy goodbye."

It all clicks in Levi's head after this. He watches as his son starts trembling in his embrace, sniffling occasionally. His talking comes to an alt and he sinks himself in his father's arms unable to stop his crying. Kurt might have been the only one who remembered his mother, who held onto that memory of him departing for a mission while his mother holds his hand with an infant Tony in her other one. Levi doesn't even know he's capable of feeling all this guilt that even he can't exactly remember the features of his significant other and he curses himself that he's let the thought of her fall into oblivion.

"Who is this!?"

"It's mommy!" Kurt sobs loudly and Levi just presses him into his arms as if he's trying shield the kid from all the evil in this world.

"Mommy? She had (h/c) hair? Really?" Kuchel bursts out excitedly, as she comes closer to her father. "Please tell me more about her!"

"I can't. I don't even rememeber my own mother's face."

"I hate you for not remembering mommy. I really do!" Kurt's screams are muffled by Levi's chest. As he lays down on the fresh grass once again he doesn't even care if his head lands soflty. The sound of his kid crying for the first time in a while is breaking him. His eyes are squinted and he's biting his lower lip in an effort to hide his pain. The vibrations of the voice that comes out of his son's mouth hit his chest like a thousand knives. He hates being a single parent in this cruel world.

~~~

Pls fill my askbox with parent au requests because I need it!!!!