#and it makes me so angry because the only thing we can do is share information and protest.

[imaginethathaikyuu]

it actually makes me sick to see people share the BDS boycott list but continue to support companies on the list lmao

one of my mutuals just made 3 tweets in a row about getting mcdonalds when a month ago they were making a thread of helpful information, posting the bds list, and tweeting the watermelon emoji

like do you actually give a fuck about whats happening or are you only virtue signaling for retweets? this shit is so fucking mind numbing like im so pissed off and i know im directing my anger at something small retrospectively but how are you going to be a hypocrite in this situation how are you going to pretend to care how are you going to ignore the simple things we’ve been asked to do i want to just scream

when the bare minimum is not supporting corrupt brands, and self proclaimed leftists can’t even do that, how is anything going to change. am i going to be angry for the rest of my life

[insanechayne]

~ ~ ~

[callmemickey]

Simon Riley fucks intensely and passionately. He doesn’t grab your hair, or spit on your face, or cause you physical pain - my man’s has openly admitted to dealing with violent thoughts/dreams against women and wanting to be better. He might get rough if he’s stressed or angry, but he won’t be, like, throat fucking you for example. Sorry. I just can’t see it. He can be fast, but I don’t think he’s gonna be hardcore or degrading. I think if he gets the mask on, he miiiight be a little more… forthcoming.

Simon Riley finds sex to be the highest level of trust, love, and vulnerability. Don’t expect him to be a quick or easy lay. If he wants you intimately, this is the biggest honor you would ever receive from him. Maybe before he was tortured he would’ve been quicker to engage, but the Simon we know now? Yeah, you gotta work.

Simon Riley… ohhhhh he’s always asking you: “is that alright, love?” “that feel good?” “ahhhh, yeah, you’re a good girl, aren’tcha?” If you’re not feeling it, he’s not feeling it. he wants to make sure you’re into it 100%. the moment you grunt, wince, or groan in pain, he’s stopping to check up on his lovie. he just radiates Soft Dom energy to me (and I want him so bad). Simon loves to see you get all flustered, too. When you beg for him (and you’re a good girl) he will give you anything and everything you want.

Simon Riley being a Soft Dom… mmm, delicious. I love to imagine him praising and worshipping: “ahh fuck, i’ve missed my girl’s pussy” “so proud of you, taking my cock so well” “you want to be a good girl for me, don’tcha?” “you’re so beautiful when you struggle to fit me” if you’re engaged with him romantically, you’re his everything - man’s invested his entire soul and well-being into you. With that being said, throw him some praise, too! He’ll melt and become putty in your hands; he’ll do anything for you. Tell him how you were made for his cock, that nobody else makes you feel like he does, how you’re sooo good - but only for him. He’s definitely possessive of you - not in a red flag kind of way, but when you talk about how you’re his and only his… whew.

Simon Riley wants to see your face when you two are having sex. Anything missionary, missionary adjacent, cowgirl, it doesn’t matter, just let this man look at you! He doesn’t crave it, he needs it. Eye contact is so intimate, and if you’re shy and can’t maintain it? Ohhh, he’s gonna have fun. “eyes here, love” “don’t cover your face/close your eyes - i want to watch you cum” “you were just begging for my cock, don’t get all shy now” “be a good girl and look at me” he’s either coming inside or on your tummy/chest. preferably? inside.

Simon Riley prefers having a good session as opposed to a quickie. He likes doing things in the privacy of your shared home (because then you can be loud and cry his name as you cum on his cock for the 4th time 🤭). Sometimes, he’ll be desperate though, and this is when he gets a lil impatient. Like this one time, he went with you to your family’s Christmas party while being on leave for only a week, and he needed you. That man took you in the bathroom and railed you so hard you couldn’t leave for 15 minutes until you could stand without shaking (also not me writing this rn).

Simon Riley, upon specific request, will wear the mask in bed. Honestly, don’t expect this for a while, however. The mask serves as his identity - his separation from you. This will take a lot of courage on his behalf as you’re wanting to bring in something containing his countless sins and crimes into such an intimate situation. Like I said!!! It takes a while to get him this comfortable. Try to rush the process and you’re missing out on some pretty intense and animalistic fucking. It’s a rare time you can expect a more vicious kind of dirty talk from him: “fuckin’ hell, you like being a dirty little slut, huh?” “that pretty little face of yours deserves to be fucked” “your pussy was made for me” “shut up and keep taking it like a good girl should” “ahh, begging for my cock like the needy little slut you are”

Simon Riley loves aftercare, and he makes sure you feel loved during that time. Sweet Angel, we don’t deserve him. Massages, baths, checking on you emotionally and mentally, he’ll make you dinner, put on your favorite movie, and relax with you while he showers you with unconditional love and adoration. He’s obsessed with you. Get over it.

[neolithicsheep]

I've been meaning to write this down for some time because there are some fundamental errors that people keep making in crowdfunding/sales that shoot their campaigns in the foot. So here's a list of easy principles.

Who am I and why should you listen to me? I am a freelance chaos marketer who has raised well over $100,000 when totaling up various crowdfunding campaigns, mostly for aid to Afghanistan. In addition I've managed to successfully market everything from stuffed plush koalas to hydration salts. Why am I putting this out here for free? Because despite a years long track record of success in social media marketing no one will hire me because I don't have a college degree, so I might as well help people out who can't afford to hire full time marketing. 

If you'd like to hire me to help you evaluate your marketing and sales and teach you better skills on a 1 to 1 basis then hit me up, I am often willing to barter, esp with artists in a variety of mediums! 

Anyway on to HOW TO CONVINCE PEOPLE TO GIVE YOU MONEY:

TL;DR: use positive messaging that humanizes everyone involved and make it as easy as possible for people to give you money.

1. Shame and guilt are demotivators. They will not inspire people to give you money. “Why aren't people helping” “I guess people don't care” “This isn't getting enough shares/donations” etc etc. Online fundraising is often frustrating, heartbreaking, and will make you angry, especially when there's a humanitarian crisis involved. It is critical that if you are raising funds for someone else that you have a place to vent that is not the audience you would like to donate to the cause. 

2. Use motivating messages instead! “You can help!” “Even a small donation is important because it tells Recipient they're not alone, and people care” “We can't fix the whole world, but we can make this one thing right, and that means something”. Emphasize that this is a problem that the reader can help fix with even a small effort. With items for sale, tell a story. "I drew this thinking about how safe I always felt under a tree in my childhood backyard". "I chose the colors in this shawl to remind me of sagebrush and piñon pine in my favorite place."

3. Make it easy for people to give you money. Never talk about your product or cause without a link that leads directly to where people can give you money. They should be able to click one link on your post and land at the fundraiser or your shop. Every required click is going to lose people, so minimize the number of them required. This also means if you have a list of fundraisers for people to choose from the ones at the bottom will be neglected - people will hit the ones at the top. Be sure to take those off when they're met or periodically shuffle the list around to make sure everyone gets a chance to be in the first 5 spots. In online stores people will often only look at the first page or two of items so be sure to shuffle things around and remove out of stock items that are taking up prime real estate.

4. Humanize the recipient - this can be tricksy when raising charitable aid because you don't want to be exploitative. But to use my last Afghan campaign as an example, “We need to raise $500 for an Afghan family” is less effective than “This Afghan family's home was damaged in heavy rains that caused extensive flooding. They only need $500 to repair and rebuild so they can stay in their home and not become displaced.”  If possible, tell as much of the recipient's story as they consent to. Eg “Fred is seven and loves dinosaurs. His favorite is brontosaurus, and he carries a stuffed one with him everywhere. He wants to be a paleontologist when he grows up and discover a complete brontosaurus skeleton that he can give the same name as his stuffed friend. Unfortunately he's also a trans boy living in Texas and his family needs $1500 to rent a Uhaul and get to Colorado so he can grow up in safety and do that.”

5. If you're not the recipient, humanize yourself while you're at it! “I'd be really grateful if you all could share or donate” “This fundraiser really means a lot to me because…” “Thank you so much for any help, whether sharing or donating” 

6. Treat the audience like humans. Speak to them like they are people you're having a conversation with, not ATMs. This ultimately is the goal of not using shame/guilt and humanizing yourself and the recipient. 

7. Set low goals and bump them up when met. One of the weird things about people is they prefer to give to successful fundraisers. Yeah I don't know either. So you're more likely to get the full amount you need if you set a partial goal initially and then raise it when that's met. Raise it in small increments and raise it repeatedly as those goals are hit to keep momentum going. You can't always control this so if you're boosting someone else's fundraiser you can do it artificially via asks like “Hey y'all can we get together and put $500 on this?”

[maidragoste]

Something wrong with me

Jacaerys Velaryon x Wife!Reader

Summary: Jacaerys comforts his wife after she tells him her worries.

I hope you have a good read. If you like it, don't hesitate to like, comment and reblog. These three things serve to motivate the writer to continue writing 🥰💖

My inbox is open if you want to make any requests or share any headcanon.

Disclaimer: English is not my first language so I apologize for any mistakes.

Something had happened. Jacaerys had no idea what she was but she knew something had happened because today you seemed distracted all day and during dinner, you barely spoke and you didn't eat much either so your husband was worried. First, he waited to see if you would tell him what the reason for your distress was, but now that you were both alone and in the shelter of his bed, your head on his chest and his arms hugging you, even so, you still didn't seem to dare to tell him so. He decided to ask you directly.

“Today I noticed you were distracted, my lady,” he said as he caressed your waist with one of his hands. “Do you want to tell me what is worrying you? That might make you feel better” he asked softly making you look at him.

“I'm bleeding,” you noticed the panic in your husband's eyes so you hurried to clarify. I mean my moon blood” You felt his body relax again.

Jacaerys thought about getting up and asking the maester to bring you some tea to alleviate any discomfort you had but when he was about to ask you to please move so he was going to look for the maester you surprised him by talking again.

“Are you disappointed?” You asked, abandoning the warmth of his chest to get a good look at his reaction, not wanting to miss any small-expression or movement. But your husband didn't look angry or sad but rather he seemed confused.

“Why would I be disappointed?” he asked, feeling lost. You hadn't done anything to make him or his family feel bad nor had you broken your marriage vows so he didn't understand how you could have let him down.

“Because I'm not pregnant!” you responded with obvious frustration and eyes full of unshed tears. You looked away and sat down feeling ashamed of yourself, for having lost your temper and especially for not fulfilling your duties. “And there's obviously something wrong with me,” you said, finally saying out loud what you had been thinking all day since you saw your red-stained clothes.

You hid your face in your hands, not wanting the prince to see that you were starting to cry. Barely a few seconds passed when Jacaerys was in front of you, gently removing your hands from your face. He felt pain in his heart when he saw your beautiful eyes full of sadness and tears rolling down your cheeks.

“Hey, don't talk about yourself like that. There is nothing wrong with you, my sweet wife. Your value is above the children you can give me” he said while carefully wiping away the tears. “You are more important than that, you are the one who gives me love and joy every day” he gently takes your face before kissing you on your forehead, his lips soon land on the tip of your nose and then on your cheeks, he begins to spread kisses all over your face until finally the tears stop and a smile forms on your lips and Jace finally kisses you like a husband should kiss a wife. You feel like you are melting from the sweetness of his kiss and from all the love he transmits to you. You feel so lucky to be his wife. He is so kind, sweet, and attentive to you. And you just want to make him as happy as he makes you feel every day. That's why you're so angry and disappointed in yourself for having your moon blood again.

Somehow Jacaerys must feel that your thoughts are turning dark again because he stops kissing you to calm your fears.

“Now, my sweet wife, I don't want to invalidate your concerns but we have only been married for a few moons so I think it is normal that you are not pregnant yet,” he said as he caressed your cheek. You still didn't seem to be completely calm so he hastened to add. "But if in a few moons, you are still not pregnant and you are still worried about it, we can go talk to my mother or the maester. I'm sure they will be willing to help us."

Jacaerys hoped that the two of you wouldn't have to have that uncomfortable conversation with the maester but for you, he was willing to do anything. He just wanted you to stop worrying.

“To be honest, it doesn't bother me that it's just the two of us for now. “I would like to have you a little more to myself,” he declared shamelessly, making you laugh before rushing you to kiss him again.

Taglist: @chaotic-fangirl-blog @venus-flytrap3 @ajordan2020 @iloveallmyboys @sweethoneyblossom1 @fudge13 @crystal-faith @tita004 @ichanelvxgue @snowprincesa1 @joyouart @rosey1981 @alastorhazbin @papichulo120627 @apollonshootafar @jasminecosmic99 @partypoison00 @labellapeaky @rebelliuna @bxdbxtxh15 @impartinghades @thegirlnextdoorssister @angeliod @snh96 @aleemendoza2425-blog @natashaobo @watercolorskyy @nyenye @savagemickey03 @kishie8 @ewwwitsel @arabis-world @missusnora @nzygftoji @alisoncdariel @cookielovesbook-akie @partnerincrime0 @klara-lily @427120lxld @justhereiguess2 @buckylahey @wa801 @artistadistrada2002 @thelastemzy @justanotherkpopstanlol @yn-jackson @pictureofcaroline

hotd masterlist

[headspace-hotel]

Problems like climate change, where solving them requires millions of people to collectively work at hundreds of different solutions at once, are black holes for internal peacefulness because they give you a type of frustration where you alternately become bitter towards yourself or everyone around you. "If only I could work harder to fix the problem!" makes you exhausted, so you must become angry at others: "If only they cared about the problem!"

People who are already working on fixing climate change need to convince more people to work on it. And a popular thing is to share writings that describe how doomed we all are if climate change is not fixed, how terrible everything will be because of climate change, and how quickly all the treasures of our world are being lost.

There is a particular understanding of human behavior that is being accepted here without thinking about it hard enough. Popular news media shows headlines with terrible prophecies, written that way in hopes of getting the attention of otherwise disinterested people, who will then be "motivated" to fix climate change.

The trouble is that fear is no good for motivating thoughtful, patient, steady commitment to solving a problem. Fear is made to cause an organism to avoid things that might harm it. It creates a brief and explosive pulse of action where the organism's energy pours out as it instinctively, thoughtlessly reacts to escape the danger as fast as possible.

It's silly to blame people for avoiding thinking about climate change. The point of an organism responding to stressors is to avoid them. Oftentimes, the only tool people are presented with is personal choices about what products to buy, which inevitably is horribly frustrating and stressful, since a person will frequently be coerced by their situation into buying a certain product, and even if they don't they see others doing it all the time.

Relentless exposure to imminent threats that cannot be escaped causes Trauma, which severely impacts a person's ability to be resilient to stressors.

I think there is definitely a type of trauma associated with being constantly aware of the destruction of the environment and feeling helpless to do anything about it, especially since we as humans have a deep need for contact with other living things and aspects of the natural world, such as trees, water, flowers, and animals—a need that is often totally denied and treated as merely a Want or a hobby meant only for certain people who enjoy particular activities, like Hiking or Gardening.

We need to expand our minds on how this disconnection can hurt a human being. Imagine if a child's need to be loved by their caregivers, a person's need to be loved by their friends and family, was treated as a desire for indulgence or luxury, or a certain use of free time!

Yes, yes, one person has a condition that makes it hard to walk up hills, another doesn't like the bright sunshine, another is allergic to the grass or fungal components of the outdoor world, but WE ARE PART OF THE FAMILY OF ALL LIFE ON EARTH and WE EXIST IN SYMBIOSIS WITH THE ENVIRONMENT WHICH TAKES CARE OF US. Who showed you what beauty was, who taught you to feel peace and relief inside you in the form of a caressing breeze and rustle of leaves, who gave you awe and wonder at seeing the stars or the mountains? Where does every delicious food come from but the soil teeming with creatures? Isn't the most perfectly sweet berry grown from a plant, nurtured by the soil and pollinated by the bugs? Don't you feel delight at seeing a springy carpet of moss, a little mushroom, or a tiny bird? Think of all that the trees give us. Whose breath do you breathe? Whose body frames your home?

The writings of Indigenous writers such as the book by Mary Siisip Genuisz I am reading right now show me that the other life forms are our family. They take care of us and provide for us, and they would miss us if our species disappeared. Isn't that a powerful, healing fact? I think everybody is so enthusiastic about the book Braiding Sweetgrass because it is a worldview that those of us coming from the dominant colonizer culture are straight up ravenous, starving to death for.

Maybe, I think to myself, humans can experience a kind of trauma from being deprived a relationship with their Earth, just as they would experience trauma from being deprived relationships with other humans.

I really believe that it hurts us to be surrounded by concrete instead of soil, to see a majestic tree cut down on a whim without any justice possible, to see wild animals mostly in the form of mangled corpses on the roadside, to have poison sprayed everywhere to kill the insects that life depends on, to hear traffic and lawn mowers and weed whackers instead of birds and flowing water.

We KNOW that this is physically bad for our health, the stifling, polluted, and stressful environments of a civilization that doesn't know the ways of the plants, but I think it's a kind of moral injury too, right? To see a beautiful field turned into a housing development of ugly, big, expensive houses—no thought given to the butterflies and sparrows and quail of the field? To see a big old tree cut down, a pond full of frogs obliterated and turned into a drainage ditch beside a gas station? They aren't just things, they are lives, and while expansion and profit and progress are "necessary," a nice old field of wildflowers or a pond full of frogs are a different kind of necessary. I remember feeling this as a child without words for it—the sheer cruelty of a world that is totally without reverence for the other creatures.

"They own the property, they can cut down the tree" "They bought the land, they can do what they want with it" <but it can also be wrong, and many people know this on some level, even though our culture doesn't provide us with the framework.

Fear could never give people the motivation to fix climate change. Constant fear of what will happen in the future forces a person to protect themselves from the relentless stress by shutting it out entirely or developing apathy.

A fear based argument for fixing climate change either causes a worldview of nature with no bond of kinship at all, based on the physical and practical dependence on Nature as a "resource," or forces people to experience their kinship with Nature only through grief.

Fear tells us that we want to live—it does not tell us WHY to live. If a person tries to live on fear alone, they will eventually find the desire to live burdensome and painful in itself. I see this emerging on a society wide scale in the USA, feeding on influences from the Christian evangelicalism that sees the Earth as something already sullied and worthless, to be thrown away like a dirty tissue, and on the looming monolith of nuclear winter that gave our parents recurring nightmares as children.

If you go to r/collapse on Reddit (don't do that) you will see a whole community of people who cope with the threat of climate change by fantasizing about it, imagining it as a collective punishment for all humanity and a cathartic release from the present painful situation.

We cannot learn to live without seeing the reason for living. We cannot save the Earth without loving it. We cannot heal nature without caring for it. In order to collectively take action against climate change, we must be moved by something other than fear—and that something is love. Not just love of the outdoors as an activity, but love of the Earth as something that loves us.

The dominant Western culture cannot borrow Indigenous land stewardship techniques as though they are just one climate resilience strategy, without being also willing to change its dreadfully impoverished way of viewing human relationships with Nature.

What right have we to think, "Huh, maybe those guys were on to something with the multi-level polyculture systems and controlled burns" while still thinking humans are nothing but a disease on the Earth, and that Earth would be happy to be rid of us? The sustainable ways of using the land practiced traditionally by cultures who have lived in relationship with their ecosystems for many generations work because humans can exist in mutualistic symbiosis with the life forms around them. We care for them. They care for us.

I know for a fact that plants seek relationships with us, and I was taught by them to see how interconnected everything really is, and how I was made to be a caretaker of my ecosystem. I was, a few years ago, just as I describe above. Too scared and pessimistic about the future of nature to bother loving it, and because of this, I could not realize my niche in the ecosystem. It felt for many years like I could do nothing—i believed in climate change, but I felt hopeless, so I put it out of my mind. But when I began to cultivate a love and reverence for the sad, scraggly, beaten-down fragments of Nature around me, everything changed. So much became possible.

I am still learning and exploring, trying to open my mind to ideas totally different than the ones I knew growing up, paying close attention to every plant and learning its ways. And it stuns me to think—some people write about climate change without this process.

The author of the book "The Uninhabitable Earth" (a scary book about how doomed the Earth is because of climate change) says in the beginning of the book that he is not very much of a nature lover. You fool, love is our most powerful evolutionary adaptation!

[anadiasmount]

to me - jb blurb

quick sum: family reunions aren’t easy especially when you and your clingy bf have been far apart the entire evening. but hey what’s wrong with a few forbidden kisses…

“jude? you in here?” you whispered loudly careful to be sure if anyone behind the door wasn’t asleep or busy. “i’m here,” jude opened the door a small and tired smile in his lips when he saw you. you let out a sigh of relief, throwing yourself almost immediately to him, jude chuckling but not holding back from hugging you tight.

his eyes closed and now happier, the familiar fancy scent invading his senses and knowing he was at peace. the bad mood he was in disappearing almost immediately when you tugged on his shirt, a sign to him that all you wanted was this. to be held. to be loved. to makeup for the past few hours.

“i tried to get away as soon as possible but my aunt just kept pushing and asking for more and more help,” you say muffled. if there’s was one thing about you, it was how much of a people pleaser you were, wanting to make sure people were content and satisfied even if you didn’t feel at your very best.

“we just finished the cupcakes and cut up all the fruit. i saved you some so you we can make a smoothie tomorrow. we still have so much to pack and decorate but i had to see you jude,” you continued.

this reunion was planned last minute as you were celebrating your parents anniversary all together by the shore. you brought jude along knowing you had little time before he returned back to international duty. though what you didn’t expect was to be far from the each other and ordered to sleep in separate rooms. not being able to share a single glance unless you crossed paths in a hall or room.

it was all unfair. especially to jude because of how attached he was to you. no one had to tell him, he knew himself and he didn’t mind one bit. so you being here now, even if it meant for five minutes, it was a maddening drive.

“y/n,”

“hmm?” you replied tiredly, your hand sneaking up all the way up his spine to resting it on his neck, thumb brushing along his skin softly. “please don’t leave me again… just stay here and we can enjoy the rest of the night here,” jude begged, lifting you up effortlessly and bringing you to the bed.

“i wish i could handsome but there’s so much that needs to be done before we can all finally rest,” you cuddle into his embrace, your nose tracing his now soft jaw where he recently shaved, pressing a kiss onto the corner of his mouth. “and you know how my family feels about us staying together,” you pout.

“yet your family doesn’t know what we do back home,” jude said smugly where you gasped and hit his chest. “stop it!” you warned getting shy and nervous. “they’re not here, and they don’t know what their sweet innocent y/n is like when she’s with me, hmm,” jude cocked his head to the side, tracing a small stand of your hair as you kept shaking your head. almost in denial yourself.

“and they won’t ever know,” you say, feeling jude’s hand rest just below your bum, then grabbing your free hand and giving your knuckles sweet and gentle kisses that made you swoon. you’d never complain or get tired of this. how affectionate, how adorned, how loving he was behind closed doors. with you and only you.

jude often got told how quiet and reserved he was. how angry and impatient he was on the field. or how his quick tempered was easily seen. but with you? it’s like a flip of a switch. a happy jude who was cling to his girlfriend and never wanted to let go or leave.

“yet you’re here, do they know that?”

“no…”

“good, because all i want,” jude got up bringing you to his lap where you giggled and shushed him as the bed creaked. “all i want is to take care of my girl,” he brushed his hand over your cheek, “and be hidden away in here with her,” he pressed a small kiss on your lips. hearing you intake a small breath of hesitation yet yearning for more.

“i can’t get over the fact i get to call you mine,” jude relished biting his bottom lip as his hand dragged your sides and traced down to your hips. “that i’m lucky enough to have you in my life,” he stared into your eyes then looked down at your necklace with his initial. “that i get to be with your forever and ever,” jude said cheekily before giving you another kiss to test the waters.

you frown leaning in for another but jude pulls back. having to resist or else then yoor whole family will know where you’re at, and what you’re doing behind the closed door that’s meant to be opened. “if i continue kissing you i won’t be able to stop baby,” jude said heavily, “i don’t trust myself especially when you look so breathtaking i’m this summer dress.”

“one more jude,” you asked, shifting closer to him, jude closing your eyes but giving in because he knew he couldn’t deny you anything. if you wanted something, you got exactly that. and if in this moment you wanted a kiss that meant and lasted a lifetime, he’d grant you that despite the restrictions he made.

he kissed you softly, relishing the playful and softness from you before he managed to lift and set your back onto the mattress. now on top of you where he controlled, soft licks that turned into a teeth clashing makeup session, with heavy breathing, groans and tiny whimpers that escaped your lips.

“if your family comes looking and they find you like this?” he taunted, feeling as you squeezed and pressed his pelvis down onto you. “in this small room with your boyfriend?” his lips pressed onto your pulse point giving you wet kisses before blowing air, making you shiver in pleasure and anticipation. your nerves on fire as you knew what would happened.

“then they’ll have to deal with because i want you. forever.”

[allisonlol]

chuuya dazai and fyodor when reader tries to remove the hickies they gave reader the next day OHKYIGOAHSS

a/n: hiii everyone i have crawled out of my void to offer you this post !! ty to the anon who came up with this wonderful idea. i've missed posting omg and we somehow are so close to 3k despite my inactivity??? slay. shall open reqs again once we get there mwehehe

warnings: slight nsfw

(Chuuya, Dazai, Fyodor) When You Try to Remove Hickeys

Chuuya

he's gonna be the most chill about this tbh

it's your body and if you don't want ppl seeing that on you then that's ur choice!!

however

hiding them is one thing, but that doesn't mean he wants to see you removing them

so yknow that hack where you take a whisk and like,,,twist it over the mark to get rid of it?

yeah so you tried that...and it was actually working until chuuya barged into the room and demanded to know what you were doing

bro is not happy to see the hickies he'd proudly left on you last night being somehow removed by a WHISK

grabs that mf thing and throws it across the room

chuuya's not angry at you, more so frustrated and insecure?? cuz like why would u wanna get rid of them

he's lowkey gonna start pouting tbh. won't say anything else but will glare & give u silent treatment

won't stop until you admit the only reason u removed them is because it was too visible with your work uniform and u didn't want everyone staring smh

insist that he should give you more in areas that people won't see and there's no guarantee y'all won't be late to work <3

Dazai

oh lord

so dazai really loves to mark you up

and last night was no different. your neck was black and blue with hickies

deadass to the point where you nearly had a heart attack when you saw it in the morning

"how am i gonna go to work like this?!" you practically sob to him while he LAUGHS

his only advice is "then don't go" as if both of y'all don't need to have ur asses at the agency in 20 minutes

you check ur phone for the time and when u see this you panic and sprint to your shared bedroom

you try everything you can think of to cover them

first you hastily layer concealer on your neck, to no avail as the marks were too dark

then digging through ur closet for clothes with a high enough neckline to hide it, to which you found none

whole time dazai is leaning against the doorframe, watching ur meltdown with an amused expression

he approaches and helps u up from the floor where u had collapsed with all the clothes strewn around you ☹️

"allow me to pick out something for you to wear" ….oh god

u guys are beyond late at this point so you sigh and accept defeat, to which dazai picks a shirt that of course displays all the marks on your neck

you got lots of stares that day to say the least

Fyodor

surprisingly fyodor doesn't usually leave too many marks on you to begin with

he's got that old fashioned take where it's like "other people don't need to see that and be in our business" if u know what i mean

however, he is also a very possessive man

^so when he gets worked up and does leave hickeys on you, the last thing he wants to see is you trying to hide or remove them

which is exactly what he walked in on u doing today

you were trying the good old "rub an ice cube on it" hack before u had to work

now this mf thinks you have some hidden agenda as to why you wanted them gone

"are you seeing someone else" 💀💀

PLS u didn't realize he had been watching from the doorway and this scares u so bad u drop the ice cube down ur shirt

u start frantically trying to get it out of ur shirt while yelling at him like "i have to work, wtf are u talking about???"

u immediately stop tho when he storms up to u and grabs your face to make you look at him

his face is so cold and unreadable omg it's scary

his eyes shift to the marks on your neck as he traces over them with his fingers

"leave these alone" he says lowly, then adjusts the collar of your shirt so they are partially covered

neither of u will say anything more about it after that, but fyodor sends sigma to secretly follow u to work to make sure that's where ur really going 😓

taglist: @deadmitochondria @miycutie @chuuyasboots @shy-socially-awkward-intovert @beandaifuku @stygianoir @sonder-paradise @irethepotato @serenareiss @ashthemadwriter @mrsdostoevsky @creamygojo @mianqo

[bbwcasey]

It feels strange and vulnerable to write something this personal here, but maybe that's why I’m doing it. Maybe because I feel like you all are the only ones who might truly understand the storm inside me—the anger and sadness that’s just really hard to put into words.

I've briefly mentioned my aunt before. She was my rock when my dad was deployed and my mom was working long hours. During that part of my childhood, she was the one who raised me. At her heaviest, she weighed over 700 pounds, almost 800. Over the years, I’ve been careful not to share too many details about her, because sadly, some of you struggle to respect the clear boundaries that should exist here.

She died on Monday. And she died in a way no one should ever have to. My heart is absolutely shattered.

She had been living in a bariatric care facility for over a decade—bed-bound, very limited mobility. For as long as I can remember, that was her reality. I watched it unfold slowly, starting in high school when she lost the ability to walk, when taking care of her became a shared effort between me, my mom, and my Yiayia. We loved her, we cared for her the best we could. But, as time passed, her needs became too great, and she was moved into the care of professionals. At least, that's what we thought.

But the facility failed her. They failed her in the most basic of ways. She needed a 4-person assist just to be bathed, just to go to the bathroom—and that wasn’t always available. Sometimes it was because of understaffing. Sometimes it was pure negligence. And that neglect led to infections. One of them turned into necrotizing fasciitis—a flesh-eating bacteria. That’s what killed her. That’s how she died. Suddenly. Painfully. Needlessly.

I am furious. And I am heartbroken.

It messes with my head in ways I can’t even explain. I’ve spent so much of my life obsessed with the idea of being that big, fantasizing about being absolutely massive, and now, here I am, mourning my aunt who lived that reality. I don’t know if she ever felt the way I feel about it. I don’t know if the things I think about were part of her experience. Honestly, I don’t want to know. Don’t make this weird. It’s not about that.

But I do know she was involved in NAAFA, long before I was even born—back when the lines between what we now call body positivity and fat acceptance were just starting to be drawn. So, there’s this overlap, this strange connection that I can’t quite reconcile in my head. I’m not scared by what happened to her, but I am devastated by it. I don’t want this for anyone, and it’s hard to see the reality of what we talk about here through this lens. It’s hard to hold space for all of it.

I don’t know how to wrap this up neatly because there’s nothing neat about this. I’m grieving. I’m angry. I’m confused. But mostly, I’m just sad. Sad for her. Sad for me. Sad for a world that lets people like her slip through the cracks because they were deemed too much—too much to care for, too much to handle, too much to love.

But she wasn’t. She wasn’t too much. She was just enough. She was everything. And I miss her.

I hate that I feel the need to add this disclaimer, but before anyone starts chirping and taking things out of context—no, this doesn’t change anything for me, and I’m not going anywhere. I’m still here, still the same weirdo who loves being fat and getting fatter. It’s just… complicated. I’m sad. It’s sad. That’s all.

[bruisedboys]

i love ur writing sm 🥹 since we got jealous!finnick can we get jealous!reader and how finnick reacts to it? ❤️

“Baby, come on.” Finnick follows you out of the glass elevator, almost jogging to catch up with your angry march. You speed up pointedly. “What did I do?”

“Nothing, Finnick,” you say sharply, without looking at him. The entire elevator ride was heavy with your silent irritation. You don’t want to talk about it, obviously.

“Well, why are you acting like I did?” Finnick presses.

“I’m not.”

“You are.”

“I’m not.”

“You— sweetheart.” Finnick snags your wrist and pulls you back. You scowl, annoyed at being pushed around. You struggle in his grip but he only grabs your other wrist, holding you still. It’s times like this that you hate having such a muscular boyfriend.

“Come on,” he says, practically begging with you now. “What’s the matter? I don’t understand why you’re so mad.”

“It’s nothing,” you say through your teeth, still struggling against his grip.

Finnick rolls his eyes and holds you tighter, his fingers digging into your wrists. “Is this about Johanna?”

“What?” You falter in your attempts to escape. It is about Johanna, actually. You’d rather he didn't know that, though. “Why would it be about Johanna?”

Even to your own ears your incredulity sounds fake, your voice a notch too high. Finnick stares at you hard and you look away, burning hot under his gaze. Big mistake.

“So it is about her?” he asks slowly. You can hear the knowing smirk in his voice.

“I don’t—“ you stammer, desperately trying to string together a lie that’s not as embarrassing as the truth. You stare at him and his awful grin for a few seconds, fuming. Then, “Fine, yes, it’s about Johanna. She wouldn’t leave you alone!”

“We talked for ten minutes, honey,” Finnick says, measured to your frantic. “You know she’s just a friend.”

“She called you handsome and then winked at you,” you say, mortified, your act completely forgotten. "What am I supposed to think about that?"

You realise your mistake too late — you’ve given yourself away. You’re about to take it back in an attempt to save yourself from an onslaught of teasing when Finnick laughs.

“So you’re saying I’m not handsome?” He asks, eyebrows raised.

Bastard. You hate him, you swear.

“Never mind,” you say bluntly. “Whatever.”

You twist out of his grasp and stalk off. You’re still absolutely rolling in annoyance when you get to yours and Finnick’s shared room. You get as far as the entryway before Finnick’s on you again like a hawk. He grabs you while you're sliding your shoes off and pushes you none too gently against the nearest wall.

“I’m sorry,” he says.

“Sure you are. You just laughed at me!" You say incredulously, hitting him in the chest.

“Because you’re being silly, darling," Finnick says. Somehow, he makes it sound affectionate. He strokes your cheek with the back of his hand. "Johanna’s a friend. How can you think I’d ever look at anyone else that way when I have you, hm? I’m yours forever, sweet girl."

You blink at him. What is his problem? He laughs at you for being jealous and then says something as life ruining as that? He’s gonna be the death of you one day.

"You really need to stop saying things like that,” you say weakly.

Finnick tilts his head to the side, a knowing look in his ocean eyes. “Why’s that?”

You glare. “You know why.”

Finnick just laughs. “You’re adorable.”

You’re about to tell him to shut up when he kisses you, too fast for you to see it coming, too lovely for you to stop it. His mouth is warm. He tastes like wine. You forget you’re angry at him. When he’s kissing you like this, you have no reason to be jealous. You guess you never really did.

“I’m sorry,” you say when he pulls away. His kiss has unravelled you. Sucked away all your anger and hot jealousy. “For being so mad at you. S’not your fault.”

"It's okay," Finnick tells you, shrugging. He dips down to kiss you again. You push up on your toes to reciprocate his heat, your hand pushing up to love on the hair at the nape of his neck. He’s pulling back before either of you can get too carried away, a smug smile on his pretty mouth as he says, “Jealousy looks good on you, baby."

-

thank you for reading! please consider reblogging if you enjoyed it 🤍

[flcwermimi]

❛ THE ICEBERG EFFECT IN THE VOID STATE ❜

Even after doing right things / following the right method / being persistant towards our desires sometimes we don't get the fruitful outcome and we all have asked ourselves WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?

According to the research our conscious mind which is aware of our feelings, thoughts and behaviour is like a tip of an ICEBERG visible above the water & on the other hand majority of the iceberg, representing the unconscious mind, lies hidden beneath the surface.The unconscious mind is thought to contain instincts, repressed memories, and other mental processes that we are not directly aware of, but which still influence our behavior and decision-making.

Hand to Hand same happens on our Void/Manifestation journey. The ICEBERG in the void state are :

— SUPPRESSED EMOTIONS - Not being able to confess what u actually feel & often ignoring the emotions overcome this by doing some action regarding when u actually feel happy or angry CONFESS IT ' I am happy/ angry '

— UNRESOLVED PAST TRAUMA/ ISSUE - Even u feel it doesn't effect at all but it does unconsciously the burden of UNRESOLVED THINGS or UNADRESSES ISSUE can lead to several mental issue and to overcome it once must overlook yourself, apologize if u are wrong,get help, share their feelings with someone

— SCARED OF THEIR DESIRE - Often someone DM 's me saying that they're scared of having their desire which is completely normal and I feel to restrict this feeling from their self once should just appreciate their self , hangout with good energy people and decrease their screen time

— SOMETHING HOLDING BACK : From my recent post I got many DM regarding how they feel what is holding them back and it's important to have knowledge on the rights things misinformation sometimes stick to ourselves very deeply

— SELF DOUBT : Many people doubts them regarding the how powerful they're, they often find validation to have their desire so it's very important to work on self-concepts and stop questioning " is it possible" or " can I have this or that?"

— NOT STICKING TO ONE THING : One individual when they're trying to enter void often keeps changing methods or finding something which can magically help them and it often leads them finding hard to believe in any methods. Even if u fail at one method at 3 - 4 times doesn't mean it's not effective it's all about mindsets u must stick to one thing and stop looking sources like ' enter the void instantly/ do this method to happen in second ' because u are not realising how powerful u are actually u don't need those things everything is on your command

— COMPLICATING THINGS : As I seen so many of people making a bunch of routine it irritates me cause They are listening subliminals also and on the side they are even doing robotic affirmation and also five minutes they are doing PSYCH -K and next they are also doing mediation and on the night they will put long bunch hypnosis and in the same night they are doing WBTB method trust me you don't need so much things u doing these all things result that u are putting the void on the pedestal Just question yourself this all is needed?doing so much u are exhausting yourself physically and mentally

— TIME : For those who really starts to panic when they don't enter void on the specific time it's ok time hasn't been wasted nothing is wrong when u didn't enter the void on your specific time the only thing u will be doing wrong in that time is making diffrent theories, underestimating yourself, finding different methods, saying yourself a failure

So these we're some things I wanted to list from the very starting I hope u all read it all through find what is actually stopping you and there is no guarantee this thing happens to each and everyone I have listed it down by over analysing the success stories, my experience

Further what u can do is listen to self concept subliminals, building confidence, don't overwork on your selves, stop finding validation and logic in everything , surrounding yourself with postive beliefs , patience is virtue so keep persisting , do something new daily as if meditate or write a journal or share your thoughts with others learn new skills

That's it all no iceberg effect is bigger than you so stop doubting yourself you can do this it's all easy peasy 🤍🫶

[spidybaby]

hi! pls do something where reader is xavis daughter and shes helpin' him with water and other things at the trainings because shes like grounded but not everyone knows shes his kid and she and pedri become closer and he defend her when one of the team say something cruel to her pls

Sorry my english is not the best is not my first language

Water girl

Summary: The team doesn't know you're Xavi's daughter until Pedri and you begin a relationshp and everything comes to light.

Warnings: cursing, physical altercation, slut shaming.

A/N: This is long, I kinda got inspired and wanted to share something with you. Hope you like it ❤️ love you✨️🌸 @gadriezmannsgirl hi 😛❤️

"You have to be kidding me. There's no way in hell I'm spending my vacation like this." You yell, hurrying upstairs.

The thing about being the kid of an elite football player is that you're not faster than them. They will always win.

You tried to close your door, but Xavi managed to stop it before it closed. "Go away, oh my God."

"That's the good thing about being your father, mi reina. You obey what I say, not the other way around. So go change and meet me in the car."

He slams the door on his way out. But the door is opened again, this time by Nuria. "You better hurry up. He's going to come back and take you to the car even if you're in pajamas."

"Nu, that's totally unfair." You whine, walking to your closet. "Are you seriously allowing this?"

"Don't forget to put on some sunscreen." She waves you goodbye and close the door.

You grab a leggin, an oversized t-shirt, and put on your Jordans. You did put on some sunscreen, not wanting to do anything with your hair, only putting it up.

"Bye, if I die, this is on you guys. Hope you know that." You told your stepmother on your way out. She laughs at your annoyed behavior.

Xavi is waiting on his car. He has this big smile on his face. To you is like he's laughing at you. You walk slowly to the car, making him raise an eyebrow.

"I'm the boss, I can be late if I want to, so don't worry. No matter how slow we are still going to make it." He says as you open the car door.

"Papi, please."

"Let's go, reina."

Having no other option, you hop up. He was giving you a talk about life and having goals. The talk continued until you made it to the training camp.

"Your uncle Oscar is waiting for you. Please go to my office." He says, handing you a "staff" card. "This opens the doors."

You obey, walking the way you already know. The long hallway that only staff members are allowed to be, and different offices, some for the technical team, some for meetings, his office.

You knocked before walking inside, your uncle was on his phone, writing something he was reading on a board.

"Hey."

"Hola, reina." He smiles, leaving what he's doing to get close and hug you. "So happy to see you again."

"Hola, I missed you so much." You hug him back. He was patting your back. "Please help me, I don't want to do this."

The sound of the door opening and laughs saved the moment for you. It was your dad with a blonde lady.

"Oh hello! It's so good to have you back."

"Hello." You smiled, not the best at picking conversations.

"Gosh, Xavi. Your daughter is so big. I remember when I last saw you at your father vows renewal, you were so small."

"This is Martina. She's the boss of the interns and some social media people." Xavi says, you smile again but this time nodding your head. "She will be your boss."

"Your father tells me that you wanted to get something to do now that you're here in Barcelona."

"Yes, something to do." You say sarcastically, Xavi gave you a look. "I'm happy to be here." You lie.

"Well, I need some help in the recovery training. They need someone who helps with the water."

"Like a water girl?"

"Si, you're going to be their water girl."

You nod, eyes on your father, who's smiling in a particular way that's making you angry. "That's great, let's go."

Martina guides you to the little room with coolers, some freezers with ice packs, a bunch of stock of Gatorade, water, and water bottles of the sponsor.

"So, we already fill this one with Gatorade and some wattle bottles from prime, the players who are in recovery have a more private training, so you're with them."

You let her explain to you the training hours, the days the social media girls were there to film and that day you had to bring the prime bottles, the Gatorade thing that makes squishi drinks and how to fill it.

"I want to ask you something."

"Whatever you want, yes?"

"I don't want anyone to know that I'm Xavi's daughter, I want just to be like an intern, maybe?"

Martina nods her head. She gets what you mean, not wanting to be favored. "We can do that." She smiled. "Also, we have these t-shirts for interns to change into, so before going to the training camp, you can change."

You went to the nearest bathroom and changed the oversized t-shirt. Leaving the old one in the little closet because Martina said so.

You grab the small cooler, walking with Martina, who was explaining to you who you were working with. You had to be there the whole training and offer the player some water every two series of exercise.

"You're today with Raphinha and Pedri. So it's going to be easy, they're nice and friendly."

She led you to the training camp, Oscar was helping the two players to warm. He waves you happy, and you return the wave.

"If you need a pointer, Pedri likes blue Gatorade and Raph likes the red one."

"Which one is Pedri?" You ask confused, not really knowing who was who because you weren't used to the team.

"The one without tattoos. I have a meeting with some interns, see you later, hun."

"Okay, have fun in your meeting."

The training was boring, nothing new. They were making a smoother training because of their injuries.

Oscar stands next to you, almost at the middle of the training. "Your dad once brought you to the training. You made everybody do push-ups. He went home super proud about you liking football."

You smile at the story, not really remembering about it. "Uncle Andres used to say I was going to be playing as a forward."

"Nah, you have more as a midfielder."

"What position do they play on?"

"Pedri is a midfielder, Raphinha is a right winger." He points at them once he mentions their names. "Venga chicos, take five and we continue."

You get up from the bench, walking to the players. They were chatting and making jokes.

"Hola, tengo agua." You say awkwardly. (Hi, I got water)

Raphinha laughed at how uncomfortable you look, more used to interns or water girls who were ready to flirt with them.

"First day?"

"Is it that obvious?" You shrug your eyes.

"A little, just used to other type of treatment." He jokes, moving his eyebrows up and down.

You don't know what face you made, but Pedri laughed at your facial expressions.

"Te mandaron a comer papilla." He laughs, hitting Raphinha on his arm. (You were rejected)

"I like you. Can you pass me the red Gatorade?" Raphinha looks at you up and down.

You get both colors, passing one to Pedri as well. He thanked you and smiled a little with you. You go back next to your uncle.

Training was quick. It wasn't like the first team due to their injuries.

You can't help but feel something weird about the job. You haven't been on a training or stadium since you were a kid.

"Hola, oye, puedes darme una botella de agua?" (Can you pass me a bottle of water), he whispers, noticing that you're distracted.

You go back to reality. Nodding and handing him the bottle of water.

"Is it fun working here?" He asks.

"Considering this is my first day like you figure out, I think it's good." You say, half smile on your face.

"Bueno, not all first times are good." He shrugs, smiling at you.

You wanted to laugh, but you just smile and nod. "Yep, that's true."

"Thank you." He hands you the bottle again. Walking back to the field.

🪷🪷🪷

The next days were easy for you. Even when you didn't want to say it, you did enjoy watching them train and do other activities than be home.

You got assigned with the recovery team as long as there were players training.

"For how long are they training like this?" You ask curious.

"Until the medical team tell us that they can train and play with the first team."

"What happened to Pedri?" You say, eyes fixed on his back. He was doing some penalties practice.

"He injured himself a long time ago, and that same injury is coming back now." He says, you nod in response. "Frenkie, don't skip that part, I'm watching you, son."

They do another five rounds until the next break. Pedri walked over to you again. "El calor está." He wipes the sweat with his hand. "How can you look so fresh? It's like hell fire."

"I used to live in Brazil, this is fresh for them." You confess.

"Wow, Brazil." He smiles. "Can I have some water?"

"Two euros per bottle." You joke, handing him the bottle. "And five per Gatorade."

"I don't have change on me, but if I found you after the training, I'll make sure to pay my debt." He smiles, throwing the bottle back in the cooler.

"I'll take that as a promise." You say, returning the smile.

"Maybe you can tell me about Brazil." He says, going back to the middle of the field where Oscar is explaining something to Frenkie.

You check your phone while the training finishes. You texted Nuria what you were doing with a picture of the cooler.

"Reina, go back inside. The weather is crazy hot, and we're almost done. You can leave the cooler."

"You sure?" You ask, leaving your phone. "I can wait."

"Do me a favor, this are notes about today's training, take them to my office and you can go do some other thing."

You nod, leaving the little cooler there and asking him to take care of it, saying you will be back for it.

You walked back to the office. You still have your dad's card from the first day so you can enter every place.

You wanted to stay inside and relax in the air conditioner but you wanted to do a nice job as you were charged.

You go back to the field to collect the cooler and take it to its place. Stealing a Gatorade for yourself while you walk back inside.

"That would be five euros, or do you have a discount?"

You turn to find Pedri smiling. He has a prime bottle in his hands. You smile back, sipping on your drink again.

"It's the payment for our job." You say, sassy teasing tone.

"I thought interns didn't get paid."

"We don't?" You ask, confused. "Well, that's sad."

You pout at the thought of it. He finds that funny because he thought the first thing they told the interns is that they're not getting paid.

"So I own you seven." He jokes.

"Make it twenty, I have to make a living." You shrug smiling. Thing that makes him smile back.

"Twenty and a talk? Or those come with an extra charge." The tone of his voice and the way he's closer than before got you thinking not so good things.

You were about to answer, but a voice calling your name from behind makes you turn back.

"How was your first day?" Martina asks. "Pedri, hola."

"Hola, I was returning the bottle and saying a little thank you for helping with the water today, especially with this weather."

"Super hot." Martina laughs. "So good you had a nice day. Let me help you with the little cooler, and you can follow me."

"Sure," you whisper to her. Turning back to the black hair boy. "See you around." You wave your hand goodbye, following Martina.

She guides you to a room with three other people, all boys. They were seated around a little table talking.

"Hey boys, this is Y/n." She introduces you, you smile waving at them. "She's new, just came and she's our new water girl."

"Hey, that's my job," a blonde guy jokes. "I'm Marcus. This is Pablo, and this is Carlos."

"Hi, nice to meet you all. Sorry about the job, by the way."

"Please explain to her the time slip and Marcus, don't worry, I'll find you a new thing to do."

She left, saying her goodbyes. You stood there awkwardly, not sure what to do know.

"Take a sit, we were chatting about the next game." Carlos pat the chair next to him. "Are you a barca fan or just here for the experience?"

"Here for the experience." You say. "Are you barca fans?"

"Carlos is a Madrid fan but don't tell anybody."

"I'm not, I just said I like Ronaldo more than Messi."

They kept doing jokes about football, you check the time slip on the wall, to your surprise you are on it.

Most of the "soft training" was assigned to you, only two days for the "regular training" that was with the whole team.

"Hey, new girl."

"Si?"

"We have a fifteen minute break. We usually sneak in the kitchen and stole some food."

"I'm in, let's go."

🪷🪷🪷

You helped with ordering the equipment for the first team, putting the cones in order and taking out the bands they used to exercise in duos.

You finished positioning the equipment, leaving the field as the players began walking upstairs.

"Hey, come here." Xavi calls you. You walk over to your dad slowly, noticing him getting impatient. "Can you hurry?"

"Yes, sir?"

"Can you go help your uncle at the gym?"

"Doing what?" You ask funny, "holding the weight while he works out?" You smirk.

"Don't be a smart-ass, reina." He tries not to laugh. "He's helping Pedri and Lewandowski. He needs help with something, I'm not sure."

You nod, walking downstairs and to the gym. After getting into the wrong place for the second time, you knew you had to ask someone.

"Are you lost?" Pedri asks.

You smile at the dark-haired boy in front of you. "Yes, this place is too big."

"Trust me, we all got lost the first week." He laughs at the thought. "Where are you going?".

"The gym, Xavi assigned me to help Oscar."

He points the direction with his head. Making you walk side by side with him.

"Oye, don't think I forgot you own me fifty." You joke. Hitting his shoulder with yours.

"Why is the price increasing by the hour?"

"Why not?" You laugh with him. "But don't worry, after the fifty the talk is free."

"It better be," He jokes back. "Well, here we are."

You walk over to your uncle, asking him how can you help him. He instructed you to help him take time and to write down the weight the players are lifting.

You sat in a machine with a notepad and a chronometer. You were timing every round to help with consistency in the training.

"Be nice with me, please," Pedri says, getting ready to start. "If I fail, you lie and say I'm the best, okay?"

"Don't," Robert interrupts. "If he sucks you can say it outloud. Please."

"Lewa, go away."

Between laughs and jokes of the two players, you finished the rest of the day, Robert and Pedri were easy to be around.

When they finished their work, you got sent back with the other interns, saying your goodbyes to them.

🪷🪷🪷

The three weeks of helping at the club were easy.

You helped the injured guys with the water.

You helped the social media team, and you did a lot of things.

Xavi was impressed that after the first week, you wanted to keep going. He was hoping you would beg him not to take you, but instead, you were waiting for him to go first thing in the morning.

"Y/n, you will be with the first team today. The boys are helping with a project, so you will be alone."

You nod, giving her a thumbs up.

"First time alone with the big team." Marcus says. "If you want advice, do what the Mister tells you. He kinda screams at everybody when the players won't do what he says."

"I'll be frustrated, too." You say, honestly. "I mean, half of them can't even create an opportunity, and when they got an assist, they won't even do anything."

"Yes, but I think Xavi plays a big role into that. Maybe the rumors about him leaving aren't that bad after all."

You shut your mouth, not wanting to say something offensive to him. Your dad gave his heart to the team during very bad times when they could barely afford the players.

"I'm going to the field."

"Don't get defensive," he laughs. "I mean, I get that as a cule you love the old players, but Xavi is a little bit out of date. Like go home, with your wife and your perfect kids."

"Do you ever shut up?" You ask, laughing to make the situation less tense. "Let's not talk about him when we don't even know what his home life is like, and maybe don't do this at work."

"Wow, you're so uptight."

You scuff, walking with the heavy cooler to the field.

When you make it to the stairs, you notice that maybe being alone wasn't that cool. You got to get the cooler upstairs on your own.

A cooler with more than twenty bottles of water on a very large set of stairs. Great idea.

"Do you need help, new girl?"

Raphinha and Fermin got closer. A few of the players behind them.

"Hola. Yes, thank you.

"Raph, grab that side." Fermin says, lifting the left side of the cooler. "Why do they even let you get here all by yourself?"

"I think they didn't think about this part." You shrug.

The two boys helped you. You stayed a little behind due to the social media team filming them doing it.

"Y/n!" Pedri says, grabbing your shoulders. "Hey, thank you for that show recommendation. My brother and I saw it last night, and now I can't wait to go home and see more of it."

You smile at his words. Two weeks back, you exchanged numbers. You were getting closer by the day so you trusted him.

"Well, Pedri." You say, funny tone. "Hello to you too, nice evening. I'm doing so great. Thank you for asking. How are you today?" You smile.

He blushed, he knows you're joking but still feels the blush spreading onto his face.

"I'm doing good." He answers, hands intertwine behind his back. Clearly nervous. "Thank you for asking."

You wanted to keep the conversation, but you two heard Xavi calling the players to warm up.

"Venga, let's go. If not, we're both getting in trouble, me for not hydrating the team and you for not warming up enough."

He liked the way you joke, how your face had the right expression for your feelings. He liked how you treated him like a normal person and not like the footballer.

"What are you doing this weekend?" He asked, making you stop halfway on the stairs. "We have the day off. So I thought that maybe we could go out. I know this place to eat thats amazing and I think you would like it."

You can't help the smile that's on your lips. You liked him, maybe more than you care to admit.

"Looks like now I have a plan." You turn around after that, walking the remaining stairs. Little did he know that you did that for him not to notice your red face. "See you this weekend." You whisper, loud enough for him to hear.

You can tell Pedri is happy. The way he kept looking at you and sending you smiles is something else.

"Hey" you feel someone pocke you in the ribs.

When you turn, you find Marcus. Honestly, he was the last person you wanted to see. After the way he insulted your father, you didn't even want to cross words with him.

"Hey, you guys done with the project?" You ask, eyes watching the other players.

"Yeah, Martina sent us to different places, and I was sent here." He sits at the edge of the cooler. You didn't move, not wanting to have him next to you. "So, the boys and I are doing something this weekend, we were thinking about going out for some food. Would you like to come?"

"I actually have plans, but have fun." You say, very dry tone. "And let's get up, they're almost done and I need to get them some water."

Marcus was that one guy that hits on you and gets offended when you don't even look at him. But he keeps trying, trying again, and trying again.

The other boys were fine, they joke with you, they share stories, they are teammates. Marcus was just not it for you.

"I can help you with that, let me do it." He says, pulling the cooler to the middle of the field without waiting for your answer.

Xavi waved at you to get your attention from one side of the field. You walked to him, eyes turning back to the field to find those brown eyes looking at you.

"Hola, papi." You say, smiling at him. "Do you want some water?"

"I'm fine, reina." He smiles back. "Hey, meet me in my office after practice. I need to talk to you."

You nod. Not thinking much of it. He always had this mysterious behavior about talks, and in the end, it was him asking you to make a reservation at some restaurant or asking you how to send a link to Oscar.

You walked back to the team, Marcus was chatting with Raphinha, leaving the cooler abandoned.

You can't help but exhale exasperated. He was acting like he was everyone's boss. The boys tolerated it, but you didn't have to.

"Oye! I forgot to give my bottle back." You heard, making you turn. "Sorry, I was chatting."

"It's okay, are you done?"

"Actually, I wanted to ask if you have more. I threw half at Pedri." He laughs.

You laugh with him, Ferran was so comic to you. He always messed with other players. Specifically with Pedri, to the point of them not being called out when he did something to him.

"I think we have some extras." You say, checking the cooler and handing him a new bottle. "Just don't shower anymore players."

Ferran was about to answer, but a very entitled Marcus walked by and rudely asked if he was finished.

"She's waiting for me, don't worry." He says in this particular tone that makes you smirk. Marcus just shrugs and leaves. Walking down the stairs. "Is he always like that?"

"Sometimes, I think he thinks that just because he named himself the boss he actually is."

"So we don't like him?" He asks, eyebrow lifted.

"We did, but I don't think we do anymore."

"We good then." He says, making this funny expression. "Thank you. By the way, what flowers are your favorites?"

You were taken aback by the question.

"I think I don't have a favorite set of flowers." You say, thinking about an answer. "I like lilies, but they're not my favorite tho"

"Okay, good to know." He nods. "I have to get back, thanks for the water." He hands you the bottle and runs to where Pedri is.

You can't help the little smile that creeps your face. He was bringing you flowers.

You spend the rest of the training with your eyes sticked to him. The little smiles he sends you and the way Ferran notices and mock him.

When you finish with them, you decide to walk to the little room the club gives to interns. You feel the effects of the new weather coming.

"Why are you here alone?" Marcus asked you. "If you don't have anything to do, I can find something for you to do."

"No need, I have to help Misted Xavi with something." You close your little locker, trying to walk out of the room.

He grabs your arm, stopping you from walking out. "I was thinking, maybe we can hang out some time."

You kindly removed his hand from your arm, smiling so you don't seem rude. "I'm going to be honest with you." You sigh, knowing this was going to be uncomfortable. "I'm not interested. You're not my type. And no, I don't want to create a friendship with you."

The way the smirk he had is now erased from his face, making you want to laugh. Not to be mean, but he was that kind of dude that believed he was above everyone and everything.

Walking out and to your fathers' office, happy about finally letting your feelings out about the whole Marcus situation.

"Well, hello, Mister Xavi." You say, opening the door. Oscar and him are sitting on the couch of his office, Xavi with his head on his hands. "What's wrong?"

They look at each other, but Oscar decided to speak. "Nothing, we wanted to tell you that you can go home early."

You narrow your eyes, that was not something your father was used to do, having a free day? An early out? Noup.

"Papi, are you okay?" you ask, just to make sure you're good to actually go.

"Si, go before I change my mind." he half smiles. "and pick some milk on your way home". He throws the car keys on your way.

"Yes sir, see you later."

You walk fast to your locker, happy that you can leave early. You tell two of the boys that you were let go for the day and said your goodbye to Martina.

You were too busy on your phone to notice Carlos getting something inside his car trunk.

You open the car, sliding into the seat and picking a Playlist. Three bangs on the glass made you let your phone go.

You pull the window down, finding a very smiley Carlos. "Is the Uber available?"

You smile, hand on your chest to calm your heart. "Hola, what do you mean uber? You gave me a ride to the mall the other day." You joke with him.

He became your friend, he was funny and very respectful. He even shares his snacks with you. "Dude, I love your car." He takes a look at the car. "Can I drive it?"

You laugh, knowing you barely even drive it because your dad takes care of it more than he takes care of you.

"Maybe later, I have to go. I got let go."

"You got fired?" He asks, not understanding what you meant.

"No, I mean, I'm going home early. Don't throw me out just yet." You laugh. "Have fun, and don't listen to Marcus."

"I won't, drive safe." He waves as he walks away.

🪷🪷🪷

"Should I wear this or this?" You ask Nuria. She was helping you with your hair. "Or maybe another color?"

She laughs, noticing how nervous you are. "Can you calm down? You will look beautiful and this mystery guy will fall on his knees." She pats your shoulders.

"I just haven't had a date in so long. I'm rusty." You joke, changing your outfit in the closet while she organized your hair tools. "Okay, opinions." You say showing her your full outfit.

She takes your hand, making you turn. "Hermosa." She hugs you. "Maybe to make it a little casual some white sneakers?" She suggests.

You agree with her. Talking while putting your shoes on. You take a last look on your makeup and hair.

"Can you tell me who the guy is? That way, I won't be nervous about you out with a stanger." She smiles, passing you your jacket. "Or can you share your location with me? I won't tell."

"I'll share the location." You say, grabbing your phone to do it. "Plus, I'm taking your car, so if the date goes downhill, I'll come back."

"Take care, and please call me if anything. Also, don't hesitate to use the pepper spray I bought you. And have fun." She rambles, making you laugh.

You sent her a kiss as you walked out the door. You texted Pedri that you were on your way, and he texted back saying he was almost there.

You were nervous about the date, not because of Pedri but because you were scared of messing up. Plus, he didn't know who you really are.

You park, walking to the host and telling her Pedri's second last name, he uses that name yo avoid people finding he's there. Even tho you'll only need to know the barca team and recognize him.

"Hola." You say, hands on his shoulders. He jumped a little. "Sorry, didn't meant to scare you."

"You didn't, hola." He hugs you, turning to grab the bouquet of flowers. "This is for you. Hope you like them."

Lilies.

Just like you told Ferran.

"Thank you, this is so cute." You smile. When you grab the back of the chair to move it. He does it for you. "Gracias, Pedri." You smile at him.

"You look preciosa." He thinks outloud. When he notice the blush on your cheeks and how you are avoiding his gaze. It's when he notice he said that and not only thought it.

"I like your hair today, I like it when you don't blow dry it." You joke with him.

You two joke a little, ordering some food. He recommended you a dish a d a drink, you let him do the ordering.

"This is so good."

"I knew you would like it." He smiles. "How is your dish?"

"Delicious, want a bite?" You ask, and before he could answer you, you grab some of it with your fork. "Open your mouth."

"Fuaa." He says, head thrown back. "That's great. Taste mine."

He repeats your action, feeding you with his food for you to taste it. "Yummy." You smile.

You two talk a about your hobbies, your music taste. Random things you would talk about, nothing crazy.

"And my parents have a restaurant, so mom cooked the croquettes for me all the time." He tells you the story of his favorite food. "And now I miss it cause I want it but I can't have it like I used to."

"I never had croquettes in my life." You confess. "I like seafood. In Brazil, I used to eat a lot of shrimp and fish. Loveeeee fish."

"Why did you come back?" He asks. "Or are you from there?"

"I was born here, actually." You began the story. "But my parents separated when I was seven, and my mom took us to Brazil two years later."

"So you spent most of your life in Brazil?"

"It's complicated. My dad and mom got into a custody battle, and I was with her from nine to fifteen. Then I was forced to come back but only for a few months cause I was sent to a boarding school in Switzerland."

"And how did you end as a intern imfor Barça?"

"My dad forced me. He was teaching me a lesson. And he knows Martina, so it was easy."

"Oh." He says. He was speechless at how crazy your life sounds. "If I can say something, I'm glad you are here."

You smile, "Thank you, I'm happy I'm back, and I'm happy to be here with you."

It's his time to blush. He really likes you. Without Ferran's encouragement, he would have never asked you out. He was nervous and awkward about it.

"Do you want dessert?" He asks, noticing you finish your drink. "Other drink?"

"You want me full tonight, sir." You laugh, making him laugh. "I'll have some if you do."

"You are making me break my diet." He laughs. "Fine, let's get those desserts."

The rest of the dinner was fine. You two had fun talking and telling stories of things that happened to you as kids.

"Are you sure you don't want to split the bill?" You ask one more time.

"Not at all, it's on me, you did your part whe you got pretty for this." He smiles.

The blush that creeps into your cheeks is crazy. You can feel your whole face burning up from the feeling.

"Did you drive here?"

"Yes, don't worry. Thank you very much for this." You hug him. "Can we do this again? I really want to see you again."

He's taken aback from your honesty. He likes that. "Si, I want that too." He smiles. "Do you like going to the movies?"

"Love doing that."

"Want to go to the movies to see this new Ryan Gosling movie?" He walks you to your car.

"Si, text me the details." You hug him again. "Popcorn is on me," you say, kissing his cheek. You enter your car. He was kinda petrifie. Hee wanted to react. "Pedri," you call him.

He comes back to the real world. "Si, bonita?"

"Tell me when you are home." You say, pulling up your window.

He waited to be in his car to freak out about how you kissed his cheek and how you asked him on a second date.

He drives home happy, ready to call Ferran and tell him all about it. How you liked the lilies, how you enjoyed food, and how you even have a second date.

When you got home, Nuria and you went to your room and you told her everything, showed her your bouquet of flowers and even told her that you have a second date with him.

🪷🪷🪷

Your situationship with Pedri was better than you expected. It's been an ongoing this for a few months now. It's the perfect time to get to know him and for him to get to know you.

You two meet up after club hours. You even began going to some of the games to support him.

As a joke, Ferran gave you a shirt with his number. Making you and Pedri laugh. You use it because it makes Pedri smile every time he watches you there, knowing you follow Ferran and his crazy idea.

Carlos knows about you and Pedri. He's your friend, you trusted him with the information and he asked you in exchange a bag of gummy bears to not tell.

He wears Pedris number for you. And he became friends with Pedri and Ferran. You four are like a nice group.

You were organizing the water closet with Carlos. Talking about music and about this new show that he's seeing.

"And this girl, she's the starting." He explains. "She has a secret romance with one of the higher-ups. Just like you." He pokes you.

"Want me to give you a speaker so you can say it louder?" You hit his arm lightly.

"Are you going on a date with him tonight?"

"I am. We are going to watch something, probably."

"If you watch the movie I recommend you. Please do a review without spoilers for me tomorrow." He says, passing you a bottle of Gatorade.

Marcus was hearing the conversation. Martina sent him to grab you for a quick meeting. But he couldn't help but hear your conversation.

"Are you coming to the game this weekend?" You ask. "He wants me here, and I don't want to be alone."

"Are you getting me popcorn?"

"Yes." You say, laughing and rolling your eyes. "I dont know if I'm nervous because this game can get us La Liga or because his family may be there."

"Maybe both?"

"Si, maybe both." You say, finishing with the work. "We are done."

Marcus hears this and walks like he just got there.

"Hey guys, sorry to interrupt. Martina wants us to have a quick meeting." He smiles. "I thought you were organizing the equipment."

"No, we are here today." Carlos answers. "Let's go."

Marcus was curious. Who was the person you were "dating." Probably someone married if you are talking about his family being there.

After the meeting, you got a text from your dad, asking you to come to his office to talk about something.

"Hola pare, em necessitaves?" (Hi dad, did you need me?) You speak to him in catalan.

"Hola, Reina." He hugs you. "How's work?"

"Good, I restocked the water closet. We have fresh water bottles. And I had a meeting about a thing Martina wants us to do."

"Great, that's fine."

You squinted your eyes. He was up to something. "Dad, anything you want to ask me or tell me?"

He rolls his eyes. "Can't a father make conversation with his firstborn?"

"Xavier?"

"Promise me you won't be mad at Asia."

You know what is coming. You heavily exhale. "Go on."

"A little bird, named Asia. Told me you are dating someone."

"Dad, this is work." You laugh. "Plus, I'm not."

You were honest, Pedri, and you weren't dating. You were acquaintances who happened to enjoy each others company.

"Okay." He laughs. "We can play the we are at work thing."

You don't notice how the door is open, thinking everybody is doing something more important than walking around.

But Marcus wasn't. He was walking around trying to find Oscar to talk to him about being able to go to the game for free as a part of the club workers. But when he heard your voice and Xavi's, he stayed.

"I wanted to tell you this when we were at dinner, but I feel like I can do it. I'm going to the game." You tell him.

Your dad loves it when you come to his games. It makes him think of you as a little girl wearing his jersey.

"Nuria and the kids are coming too."

"The kids too?" You ask, confused. "Don't they have to go with their grandparents?"

Marcus raises his eyebrows. His wife and kids are coming. You and him will have dinner together.

Then it clicks, you were talking about Xavi. And Carlos knew about you and him.

"Anyways, I have to go." You say, getting up and walking to his mini fridge. "I'm taking one of your special drinks. After all, I earn it."

You two laugh, you hug your father. "Back to work. I don't want my father to find out I'm not working." You joke.

"I'm sure he won't mind. You are with the Mister, he will understand."

"Yeah, you don't know him." You tease him. "But you'll like him, maybe we can arrange a meeting, sir."

"Go to work, reina." He laughs, shaking his head while he does it.

Marcus hides in an office, waiting a few minutes before going out. He was mind blowned, you were having something with Xavi.

He walks back to the comune corridors. Not paying attention to his surroundings, the only thing in his mind was this new information.

For you, it was all flowers, dreams, happy days.

You get to see the person you like every day, you get to spend at least a little bit of time with him.

"Stop, you need to train." You say to pedri, who's too busy kissing you and hugging you. "Pepi, stop it." You giggle.

"Why?" He pouts. "One more, and I'm leaving."

"No, guapo." You try to push him. But he brings you back to him. "You are going to be late." You say.

He grabs your cheeks, kissing you goodbye. You hug his body. Loving the way this feels. The way his lips dance with yours and the way your tongues mix just makes sense.

When he separates to take air, you place your hand on top of his mouth. Blocking him from kissing you again.

"You have to go." You whisper breathlessly. "The Mister will be mad at you."

He kisses the top of your forehead. Eying the clock on the wall. He really needs to go. "I'll see you tonight?" You nod, still catching your breath. "Okay, I'll see you then" He kiss your cheek and pulls away.

You wait a few minutes before coming out of where you two were hiding. Walking to the interns room.

Marcus was there. He eyed you from head to toes. "Hello." You say. He only smiled. He still had a bone to pick with you from the way you rejected him.

"So, are you coming to the game?" He asks.

"Yeah, I got tickets. Are you?"

"Don't know, still deciding."

You nod, not wanting to keep the conversation. You walk over and find Carlos waiting with the coolers with you.

"Can you be more late?" He plays with you.

"Shut up and work bitch." You joke.

"Hmmm." He shakes his head. "Says the one who was tonguing her boyfriend on the janitors closet."

"I hate you." You side eye him. He laughs and walks away with a cooler. "And he's not my boyfriend." You whisper to him as you enter the field.

"Okay." He pauses, thinking. "Your fuck buddy?"

"He's not my-" You hit his arm. "He's not my fuck buddy." You whisper.

"So you haven't fuck him?"

You blush at the question. You did sleep with him, but he wasn't your fuck buddy or anything like that.

"So you did fuck him." Carlos laughed. "If he is not your boyfriend then you are fuck buddies until he asks you out formally."

You stayed quiet for the duration of the training. Until it was time to offer the guys some water. Carlos was right. He wasn't your boyfriend, but you were having sex and doing things couples do.

"Let's go."

You walk over to the guys with the vest. It was easy that way, since they all stayed together to plan a strategy.

You are thinking still. They players are grabbing their waters and talking to themselves. You turn your head to the other part of the team.

Pedri was looking at you, you smile at him. Ferran sees this and decides to tease him. The others think it is just him playing, but it was more than that.

"Distracted much?" Raphinha asks, smiling at you. "You okay?"

You nod. "Just thinking." You say honestly.

"Don't tire your mind." Lewandowski says.

"Easy for you to say, you can take your thoughts away by playing."

"A piece of advice, if it can be solved then you don't have to worry about it. Think about how you are going to solve it and do it."

"And if it doesn't have a solution?" You ask Lewa.

"Then don't think about it." He smiles again. "If you can fix it, learn from it and move on."

You nod, thanking him for the advice. "More water before I go?" You ask, hearing Oscar blow the whistle.

"Noup." He throws the bottle back into the cooler.

You go on with the day, not thinking much of the situation. It has a solution, and you can resolve it.

You sit next to your dad for dinner. Texting pedri carefully that as soon as dinner is over, you will meet him up.

"I can't wait to see you at the game. I have a good feeling about it."

You smile, letting him and Nuria do the talking. You eat some pieces of your food, feeling nauseous and tired.

"What's going on with you?" Xavi asks. "You are not the type to leave food."

Before you answer, Asia decides to intervene. "She has the love syndrome."

Both Asia and Dan decide to make kiss noises and throw jokes at you about your love life.

"Stop it, kids." Nuria laughs. "Are you okay?"

"Si." You nod. "Just tired. Maybe I'm coming with a cold." You lie.

"Then take a seat next to the dog because I don't want to get a cold too." You dad jokes. Getting up to take his plate to the sink.

You roll your eyes. "Can I use your car? I want to visit Karlie." You lie again.

"No drinking and driving." He says, stern tone. "Please don't come back at like three in the morning." He throws the keys at you.

You nod, taking your plate to the sink and going upstairs to brush your teeth. You fix your hair before going back down. "Bye, I'll be here in a bit."

You arrive at his house. You two meet up there because you haven't revealed that your father is Xavi Hernández.

He kisses you hello and takes you to his room. He has some candy and Amazon Prime open for you to pick any movie you want.

The movie goes unnoticed by you. The words of Carlos and Lewandowski are taking all your mind. You grab the controller, pausing the movie.

"What are we?" You ask, very straightforward.

Pedri chokes on his gummy bear. "Qué?"

"What are we?" You repeat. Louder this time.

He's trying to think about what to say. He doesn't even know what you two are. You have no labels.

"Are we just fuck-buddies?" You ask.

"No." He quickly answers. "You are more than just that." He says.

"What more?"

He tries to find the right words. He doesn't want you to feel scared if he confesses all his feelings for you.

And he also doesn't want to run when maybe you want to walk. He wants to make you feel comfortable.

"I want us to be more than just friends." He says.

"We are." You say, serious tone. "We fuck, we kiss, we cuddle in bed while we watch a movie, you introduce me to your brother."

"Listen, Y/n." He sits. "I want more than that. I just thought that maybe you would be more comfortable like that."

"Why?"

"Huh?" He's confused. What do you mean why?

"Why did you think that?"

"I'm a footballer." He spat. "And to be honest, a Google search will show you that the media thinks I'm a fucking womanizer. Girls here and there when, in reality, I don't even go out to get groceries."

You smirk at that. He was a very home orienteded guy. "I don't believe in rumors, I believe you."

"And I'm happy about it." He grabs your hand and kisses it. "I like you a lot. You are not just someone I have sex with and then leave. I do want more."

You grab his face, kissing him. You wanted more than just friendship too. You wanted to move forward with the relationship.

"Ask me then." You smile.

He laughs, if there's something he loves about you is how straightforward you are. You are not afraid of saying anything.

"Y/n, preciosa mía." His arms hug your waist. "Will you honor me by letting me be your boyfriend?" He smiles, eyes shining.

You smile too, watching every detail about his face, the way his smile is reaching his eyes, the way his hair looks, the way he smells.

"Let me think about it." You joke, making him pull you down to the bed with him.

"Preciosa, venga, no bromees." He kiss you.

"I will honor you." You say, smiling like crazy. "I really like you too, and I'm happy right now." You laugh, grabbing his cheeks and kissing him.

You two spend the rest of the movie like that, kissing here and there, paying more attention to each other than to the movie.

"Wear my jersey to the game." He requests. "I want my girlfriend to wear my number on her back. It will be like a motivation."

You nod, smiling at him. You were planning on wearing it anyway. You wanted him to notice how much support he has on you.

You checked the time, it was past midnight. "I have to go. My dad will be pissed if I don't."

"No." He hugs you, getting on top of you. "Stay here."

You laugh. "Pepi, if I don't get home as soon as possible, I don't think I'll be allowed to go to the game anymore."

He sighs, kissing you quickly before letting go. He walks with you to your car. "Call me when you are home and drive safe."

"I always do." You say cocky, making him smile. His head gets in the car for him to be able to kiss you. "Adiós."

🪷🪷🪷

The game wasn't as good as you expected. The team lost, and with the loss, they gave Real Madrid the Liga trophy. Now there's only hopes for the second place.

Xavi was mad, you can tell by the look on his face and how he stormed out to the dressing room.

You knew this was a bad moment to the players. They all look sad and stressed. But you can't blame Xavi. They don't even work as a team anymore.

Carlos and you walk into the tunnel. You had access to those areas due to the security guys recognizing you from working there.

You wanted to wait to at least talk to Pedri, check if he's fine in person, and not over text. "I'll wait here. If you want to you can go."

"Okay, see you tomorrow then." You kiss his cheek goodbye.

You sat in one of the benches at the corridor. Checking your phone to see what people are saying on X.

You feel angry at how people blame your father. He wishes to be able to go into the field and play for them but he can't.

After all, he was a barça legend, and they are just teenagers and adults acting like five years old who can't make a team with the others.

Goundogan and Araujo fighting. Ter Stegen is saying Xavi doesn't need to call out players after losing a game. It was a shit show.

You heard the dressing room opening. Your father walks mad, his belongings in hand. You stand up and try to talk with him.

"Not right now." He says, deep mad voice.

You only nodded, taking a seat at the bench again. You want to do more, but you can't even begin expressing how much you this situation hurts you.

Some of the players began leaving. Some waving goodbye to you. Thinking you are there as a job and not just to watch the match.

Ferran walks out, head low and earphones in. You grab his shoulder. "Hey." You say even tho he can't hear you.

He takes his earphones out to greet you. "Hey." He sighs. "What a shit show, isn't it?" He laughs.

"It's okay, it's just a bad moment." You hug him and say goodbye to him.

"Pedri is inside, he's taking a shower."

You text him telling him that you were waiting for him. You walk to the interns room to pick something from your locker.

After all, that was one of the only rooms that didn't have a lock. You walk and see Marcus and Raphinha talking.

They both look at you, but Raphinha's gaze was a weird one. You can't pick it. Maybe it was his humor after the lost.

"I just want something from my locker." You walk quick and open it. "Sorry about the lost, Raph." You say, pulling the item and closing the locker door. "Bye."

Pedri texted you to meet him at the parking lot. He was out of the dressing room and walking over there.

You do as he told you. Meeting him there. He was inside his car, doing something on his phone.

You knock on his window. He opens the passenger seat door for you. "Hola." You whisper, not sure how to approach him.

"Xavi told us he's leaving." He confess. "And my family couldn't come."

"Pepi." You sigh. Hugging him and kissing his cheek. "I'm so sorry about today. If it makes you feel better, I think you played better than anyone else." You kiss his nose. Making him smile.

"Thank you for being here." He poses his head on your shoulder. "Want to go get something to eat? I feel like having something bad." He laughs.

"Whatever you want, guapo." You kiss him. Hands squishing his cheeks. "Let's go."

Yourusername has added to her story

"I feel like this season is just too much for us." He says, eating his fries. "We are falling apart."

"The whole Ronald and Gundo thing is just dumb, I will take Gundo's advice. He was in ManCity and they are champions."

"But I can't blame him. Maybe the delivery wasn't the best." He says, thinking about the situation. "And I think Xavi and Oscar weren't doing their best."

"What are they doing wrong?" You ask curious. He was one of the few playes that did what Xavi and Oscar asked him to do. "I mean for what I see at the training, he is giving instruction, explaining how to create opportunities and then at the game Lewandowski and Raphinha do the opposite."

Pedri wasn't surprised at your football talk, he find it amazing when you first gave him advice, and now he asks for feedback.

"You have the most assists this season of La Liga, and the majority of those were lost opportunities. At this point, the only thing that can save you guys is if Oscar and Xavi get in the field with you during the games."

"Bueno, if you put it like that, then yes." He scratched his head. "That water job of yours is giving you too much to fight me for." He laughs

"It's not my fault I can take the instructions better than your teammates." You laugh back. "But I know Xavi thinks you are one of the best elements of the team." You say, head over his shoulder.

You weren't lying. Your father was happy with him, maybe wanting to correct little things, but seeing the big picture, he was the perfect successor of Andres."

"I'll believe you." He kisses you. "Want me to drop you home?" He says, finishing his meal.

"My stepmother will pick me up from your home, she's just a few blocks away."

You still have to tell Pedri about your dad. When he told you that Xavi announced the possibility of leaving, you already knew.

He talked about it with Nuria and your siblings. Letting you know before anyone else, LaPorta, the players, the press.

"Why do I feel like you don't want me to know where you live?" He asks, curious about why his house was the only place you two meet.

"I do, it's just complicated."

"You dad doesn't know we are together?"

"He knows I'm with someone, but right now, he's dealing with work issues." You didn't lie. He was. Pedri knows but he doesn't know he knows.

"Okay, I trust you." He says, resting his hand on your thigh.

You texted Nuria, letting her know that you will be at his place in about five minutes, for her to pick you up.

Just like Pedri, Nuria didn't know the reality of your relationship. She thinks he is someone you met around, maybe at a party. Not a player from your father's team.

When you get the text saying she's outside, you stand up, ready to leave. "She's here, adiós, guapo."

But he has other plans. He stood up, grabbed your wrist and walked to the door with you.

"I want to say hi." He says. Walking hand in hand with you, happy to be able to meet someone from your life.

You stop, he will recognize Nuria if he sees her. "Pedri, no." You pull him to you before he reaches the door. "My stepmother is kinda delicate."

"Y/n, be honest." He frowns. "Tell me if you don't want me to meet your family. You know my brother and I want you to know my parents."

You think for a moment, you do want him to meet Nuria and your father. Not like his trainer, just as your father.

"The thing is, I'm planning a dinner with my family and you. And I want it to be perfect and for you to meet them calmly and not at the street."

"You promise is that?" He pouts.

"Let's do this. You have three days off for the next match that is on Friday. Let's do the dinner on Saturday so you don't stress about the game. Deal?"

He smiles, nodding excited about the idea. "Deal." He says, hugging you. "I was so scared of you being embarrassed of me or something."

"What?" You laugh. "Eres tan tonto, it's not that. You know that now."

He nods. Kissing your lips. "Go, she will get mad from waiting."

You kiss him again. Telling him a quick goodbye. When you get to the car, Nuria is watching you all smiles.

"What?" You ask her.

"Nothing I just love seeing you so happy, I'm a fan." She laughs, making you laugh. "I need you to tell me when are we meeting him."

"You are lucky, I invite him on Saturday, so your job is to keep my dad happy." You joke.

"Well, I have all morning to make him feel less angry if the game goes downhill."

"Let's hope it doesn't." You beg.

🪷🪷🪷

You can't deny you will miss working at the club when the season is done. You learned to like the job and you have fun with the guys, even with Marcus.

"I'm going to miss organizing this and stealing Gatorade." Carlos says. Drinking the last bit of the drink.

"Can't you get one at the store?" You joke.

"It will not be free. Duh!"

"You want to know what else is free?" You ask. When he nods you get close to him. "Our labor here." You whisper.

He laughs so hard that some of the players that are walking past to the camp turn to see you. "I want to know the joke, tio." Sergi jokes. "Also, if you can pack a purple Gatorade, I'll really appreciate it."

You pass the training talking about random things. Pedri was looking at you from time to time.

He told you how a little anxious about meeting your family. You were too, you hoped he would understand your reasoning.

"I don't know how you two haven't been caught. He can't keep his eyes away from you." He says, noticing how the canary looks at you every five seconds. "But to be honest, when we first started every player was looking at you."

"Maybe that's why they don't allow female interns." You laugh.

You finish the training between jokes. The few last trainings were always the best. The vacation spirit was hitting the players.

You returned both coolers. When you were about to leave, you saw Raphinha reclined into the doorfr. "Hello to you too, kitty girl."

"Hola." You say. "Do you want something?"

"Can't a man just get a talk?" He jokes.

You nod. "How are you?"

"I can be better." He walks closer, maybe a little too much for your liking. "I want to ask you something." When you don't answer, he decides to keep talking. "I got told a little story about you. And I'm interested in it."

You narrow your eyes, nodding your head to indicate him continue with the story.

"I know how hard it must be to work as hard as you do, with all this ahit show, organizing stupid bottles. Look, I don't blame you for what you do here. But someone as pretty as you can get better things from someone like me. No need to fuck old flesh for some cash." He says, posing his hands on your waist.

You push him away, "What the fuck are you even implying?" You have a stern tone. "Don't ever touch me again. You are disgusting."

"Such a prude now, huh?" He laughs. "We all know what you do. It's no secret. I'm just taking my chances to be the next one in line." He tries to get closer again. "I can fuck you better than him, let's be honest."

Your hand hurts from how hard you hit his cheek. Making his face turn. "Você é uma pessoa nojenta, fique longe de mim." (You are such a disgusting person, get away from me), you say, pushing him to get out of the room.

His hand grabs your arm. Pulling you back. "Você age como uma puritana, mas você é uma prostituta." (You act like a prude but you're a whore)

"You have a wife and a child." You remind him. "And you are here accusing me of something I don't even know about. You are disgusting."

"I'm not the one fucking someone from the club." He laughs. "You are."

"I held your son while Natalia, your wife, was using the bathroom. She was telling everybody how happy she was that she was visiting. And you act as if she's nothing. You dont deserve her." You say, taking his hands off of your body, "I'm telling you this only once. So you better listen. Don't mess with me because I'm not the one. You have no idea the kind of power I have. Stay away from me, or I'm telling everybody what you did."

He lifts his hands. Looking at you with a mad stare. You feel like crying, but you won't in front of him. "Move, deixe-me ir." (Let me go)

He moves to the side. You run, wanting to go home. You go to the interns room, searching for you things in your locker.

Your hands are shaking. You can't even get the key into the lock. Three knocks on the door got unnoticed by you.

"Hey, Y/n?" You heard Ferran's voice. "Are you okay?"

He walks over to you, and he places his hands on your arm and back, but you back up. "Don't touch me." You shout at him, moving away from his touch.

You don't mean to do it, but you can't even think straight. "It's okay, deep breaths." He says, hands motioning you to take a breath. "Yeah, that's it. Do it again." He says, he backs a little from where you are.

You take a few breaths, feeling yourself calming down. You hated the feeling of being uncappable of defending yourself.

"That's it." Ferran cheers you. "Here, I have a napkin on me. Don't ask." He hands you the napkin. You smile at his joke.

"I'm sorry for shouting." You say, voice shaking. "I just, I want to go home." You whisper, feeling the tears fill your eyes.

"Can I come closer and give you a hug?" He asks, you nod. He hugs you, one hand on your shoulders and the other on your head, pushing it against his chest. "I don't know what happened, but if you need a friend. I'm here."

You hug him back. You really needed a hug. "Gracias." You say, "Where did you get the napkin, tho?"

"I hide a cookie." He confess. That makes you laugh a little. "Hey, you laughed."

You separate from him. "Thank you, Ferran." You smile. He asked you for the key to the locker, opening the lock for you.

You grab your things. And he locked it again. "Do you need want to go? I can call you an Uber, I don't have my phone but it's in the dressing room. In my station."

You smile. Shaking your head. "I just need to find Martina and tell her I'm leaving." You say, walking to out of the door with him. "Hey, you wanted something. Can I help you before I leave?"

Ferran feels sad. You grow a friendship with him. You are someone very calm, and he can tell something might have happened for you to react the way you did.

"Don't be silly. Let's find Martina."

"It's okay, I know where she is. Thank you for helping me. I'll go by myself."

"You sure?"

You nod, giving him one last hug. "Bye."

You walk to the office where Martina is, she's always there with the social media manager. You knock to see if she was there.

"Come in."

You open the door, finding Raphinha talking with her. Both of them laughing and joking about something.

"Hey, is everything alright?" She asks when she sees your red face. "What happened?"

You lock eyes with Raphinha, he has a smirk, like if the situation was funny to him. You want to grab your bag and hit him.

"Si, I just want to know if I can leave early. I don't feel well and I want to go home."

"Oh honey, is there something I can help you with?"

"Si, can we help you?" He asks.

"It's just an allergy reaction, and I feel like I should probably rest a little." You lie, looking at Raphinha while doing it with a disgusted face.

"Go home and rest, if you want to, don't come tomorrow. I have those reactions, too, and it's the worst."

"Will do, thank you for understanding. Goodbye." You wave at her, walking outside the door, but you turn to say something."Oh, Raphinha."

"Si?"

"Lembre-se do que eu lhe disse. Fique longe de mim." (Remember what I told you. Stay away from me.) You smile. "Been practicing my Portuguese." You say to Martina, who smiles at you, not understanding anything you just said.

You went home, thankful that Nuria was out at an event, and you can cry in peace in your room. You turn your phone off, not wanting to deal with anything and just staying in bed until you have the strength to get up.

Ferran told Pedri what happened, the way he found you. He called you five times and texted you another few more. But nothing. You were mia.

He spent the rest of training worried about you. He wanted to know what happened for you to be crying and left early.

Once he's home, he can concentrate on anything, checking his phone every minute to see if the message was delivered.

That's when he remembered, you sent him over text your address for the dinner with your parents. Telling him that you did it because later on, you would forget.

He grabs his keys and drives over to your house. He didn't care if he looked imprudent. He needed to make sure you were okay.

"Y/n, are you sure you don't want to talk?" Nuria asks again. She can't help but wonder why your eyes were puffy and you were sad. "I won't tell."

"It's nothing." You answer. "I'm just taking a shower, just in time to eat dinner with you. Deal?"

"Okay, if you need me, I'm here." She hugs you. "I'm going to get some takeout, I feel like that will make you feel better."

You nod, thanking her and closing your bathroom door and taking a very hot shower. You needed that. You bring your alexa to the bathroom and ask her to play something while you shower.

Pedri was impatient, the traffic was making him bounce his knee. He wanted to be able to just drive over all these people.

He tries to call you one more time, with no answer. Your phone was still off. He wanted to know if you were okay. Just that.

"Y/n?" Asia asks, knocking on your door. "When mom returns, we will make your favorite brownies to make you feel better."

You smile, you know they want you to be okay no matter what happened. "Thank you, A. I'll help you. Just let me change, and I'll go to the kitchen."

You change into some bikers and a plain shirt. Or as you like to call it, your lazy outfit. You dry your hair, not wanting to deal with the freez later.

While your blow dryer is on and alexa is playing something in the bathroom. Xavi and Nuria got home.

"Marcela told me that it was an allergic reaction. That's what she said."

"I think there's more. Plus, she looks fine, not a single red mark on her face from allergies. Maybe talk to her later."

You finish with your hair. You wait for Nuria to be back or call you to go down. You charge your phone even though it's off.

You put your hair in a ponytail, completing the lazy look with your sleepers from a hotel that you went to a few years ago.

While you wait in your bed, Pedri drives into the community where you live, the security guy recognized him and asked for a photo.

He let him go past the gate since he was a known person. Thing that makes him laugh. He follows the gps to your street.

He parks in front of what he thinks is the right house. He walks over to the door and ring the doorbell.

"Xavi, please open the door. I'll go get the kids." Nuria says, walking upstairs.

Xavi walks to the door. When he opens it, he finds Pedri. "Pedri, tío. What are you doing here?"

Pedri is as confused as his trainer. He doesn't understand what happened and how he ended at Xavi's house.

"Hey, Mister. I think I got my gps confused. But it's nice to see you. Sorry about the press thing today. We were all confused and mad."

"It's okay, you guys worry too much about me." He laughs. "Venga, come inside." He moves for the midfielder to get in. "Are you hungry? We are about to eat."

"I don't mean to bother." He smiles. "I think when Lewandowski sent us the address to your home for lunch, it got overlapped with the one I was looking for."

"Happens to me all the time." He laughs, making Pedri laugh. "But you don't bother, honestly. Have some dinner with us."

Pedri agrees. He thinks this is a bad coincidence, but he will use it to maybe talk with Xavi before he leaves. Thank him for everything.

"Pedri, this is Nuria, my wife." He introduces him to his wife. "Nuria, this is Pedri. He's number eight. A good kid. I invited him over."

"Hola, that's so great. Please take a seat. Our kids will be with us in a moment."

"I'm sorry about coming without notice. I got the address wrong. I was looking for someone who lives in the same neighborhood."

The sound of children interrupts the talk. "Mom, did you get the brownie stuff?"

"Asia, come here, baby. This is Pedri. He is a football player at the club." The little girl waves.

"Do you work with dad?"

"I do." He smiles. "He's the best, you are lucky yo have such an amazing dad."

"He's cool." She says, looking at xavi. But he's not allowed to make brownies with us. He burns them."

"Are you making brownies?" Pedri asks. Trying to make conversation with her. "That's yummy."

"Yes, it's for my sister. She's feeling blue."

"That means you are a very nice sister. I have a brother named Fernando. When I'm blue, he hits me in the head." He makes the little girl laugh.

"My other two are somewhere in the house." Xavi explains. "Actually, how old are you?"

"I'm twenty-one."

"My oldest is twenty. Almost the same." He passes the plate to Pedri. "You probably recognize her. She's helping at the club."

"Really?" He asks, confused. "Didn't know that."

The laughs of a boy can be heard. Pedri is trying to remember if he knows who Xavi's daughter is.

"Reina, come here." Xavi says, waving you to come over.

You have your brother in your arms, laughing with him. "Yes, sir?" You ask, laughing.

Pedri feels how his body tenses at the sound of your voice. And you stop laughing once you see him sitting at the table.

"Pedri, this is Y/n and Dan. She works as an intern. She helped us with the water and stuff. "Y/n, I think you already know Pedri."

"I do." You say, putting your brother down, your eyes never leaving his. "Hi, Pedri."

"We know Pedri, he plays for barça." Dan says, making Pedri smile at him.

"Well, everybody got food. Let's sit down and eat." Nuria says, leaving the salad on the table. "Hey, you feeling better?"

You nod at her question. You wanted Pedri to find out about your dad but not like this. Not after the day you have.

"Y/n, take a seat." Asia asks

The only plate left was in the seat next to Pedri. You sit down, he looks at you. You are not sure what the emotions his eyes are showing are.

Xavi asks Pedri different things, talking about his family. He met Pedri's parents during one celebration at the club.

"So you two know each other?" Nuria asks Pedri and you.

You look over at him. "We do." You answer. You can see his smile. "When I got to the club, he was training after an injury, and I was assigned to be the water girl for that training." You smile.

"Yes, she was very shy and weird the first day." He laughs, making you laugh. "When she got moved to the whole team, the first times she just left the cooler and moved."

"I did not." You say. "Ferran and him were throwing water at each other." You say to Nuria. "I was scared of getting wet."

"I can admit I once used her as a shield." He laughs. "It was funny."

Nuria looks between you two. The way you smile at each other and they way you look at him.

The dinner went well. Pedri and Dan clicked in a way that any other guest at your house ever did. Asia invited him to make the brownies with you. Uninviting Nuria from the equation.

"Y/n, can you help me with something?" She calls you. You were searching for the ingredient.

"Si. Dan, please help me with the ingredients, okay baby?" You gave him the list of things.

Nuria and you walk into the laundry room. "Okay, confess." She says. Looking at you with narrowed eyes.

"What?" You asks, confused about what she's talking about. "Context, please?"

"I have a theory." She began. "Is that you are overly friendly with Pedri, and you are ten times more clingy and needy with your boyfriend. Or that we are going to see Pedri again at the dinner this Saturday, but not as the Barca Player but as your boyfriend."

You stayed quiet. Your silence was all she needed to confirm it. You just blush at how obvious you were.

"I also think it's important for you to know that he didn't know until today that Xavi is my dad."

"Y/n." She says, eyes widening. "How?"

"I asked Martina to omit the fact that my last name is Hernández because I wanted to just not be Xavi's daughter for once. I wanted to be me."

"I get it, believe me." She hugs you. "Oh my God, I'm so happy, you two look amazing together."

"You think dad would flip if I tell him that he is my boyfriend and that the job he got me to keep me occupied worked, but my occupation is not only being an intern but having a boyfriend?" You ramble a little.

"Why don't you tell him now?" She asks. "He's here. He likes him, and to be honest, I don't want to get all dressed up for something we already did but didn't know we were doing."

Nuria and you debate a little about the whole telling your dad thing. She encouraged you to tell him now that he is in a good mood.

"Hey." You say, walking back into the kitchen. "Can I talk to you? Nuria will help them." You guide them to your backyard. Seating on the couch you have there for parties. "I'm sorry I was gone all day, I just had a rough day and wanted to come home."

"Something happened?" He asks, worried. "You don't usually turn your phone off and walk out of the club."

"I don't want to talk about it, don't worry. I'm better now." You smile. "I'm sorry about not being fully honest with you." You say, referring to your family situation. "I honestly thought I was getting out of that job in two weeks, but I grew a like for it."

"And you stayed." He finish your sentence. "You tend to do toxic things. Have you noticed that?"

"Eres un tonto." You say. He opens his arms to you. You fall into them and snuggle your face on his shoulder. "Don't be mad?"

"Am not, I was shocked when your dad opened the door. I thought I was going crazy and that my car gps was failing." He chuckles. "Then I see you walking as he says you are his daughter, and all I'm thinking is now it makes sense why you know so much about football."

You laugh. "And all those things I told yo about him liking you more than the rest because you listen to him? You now can actually believe me."

He hugs you tight. He was so worried all day about you. "Ferran was worried. He didn't even bother me during training."

"You are welcome." You joke. "I was thinking, maybe we can use this opportunity to tell my dad about us."

"Don't you think it's enough off a surprise that I knocked on the door without an invitation?"

You were about to answer when a voice makes you turn. It was your dad on the balcony right above where you are.

"Creo que ya me lo han dicho sin decirme, chavales." (I think you told me without telling me, kids) he shakes his head. "Pedri, not only as your trainer but as the father of the girl you are apparently with. I think it's time to go home and rest for the game."

"Si, Mister." He shyly smiles. "Thank you for the food. See you tomorrow." He separates. "See you tomorrow, Guapa." He whispers as he walks back inside the house.

"Dad, that wasn't nice."

"Bring me a brownie when they are ready, we need to have a chat." He winks at you. Going back inside.

🪷🪷🪷

The game went amazing. They won second place on La Liga. It wasn't the worst, after all. Pedri scored two goals, giving a very nice almost end of the season.

"It was a good game." Carlos says. "I'm going to miss this so much."

"Me too, I like some of the players already, and I'm going to miss seeing you steal Gatorade for the gym."

"Shhh, I can't get caught." He jokes. You walk over to the interns room. "Wait, I'll go to the bathroom. Can you pick my stuff for me?"

You nod, opening your palm so he can give you his locker key. When he does, you walk to the room. You walk inside, grabbing your bag and Carlos things.

You text Pedri congratulations, and you tell him where you are. He asked you to wait for him there. Ferran and him will meet you there.

You heard the door slam closed. You turn and see Marcus. He has this smirk on his lips. "Hey, did you enjoy the game?" You ask, going back to your phone.

"I know what you are doing." He says, sitting at the table. "You can stop pretending."

"Qué?" You ask, confused. "What are you talking about?"

"I heard you talking with Carlos, telling him about your date, how his family was going to be there. And then I saw you walking out of that shithole, after being with him."

"Okay?" You smirk. "Why is that your concern?"

You didn't mind if he saw you and Pedri sneaking out here and there. You weren't going to hide it. Season is about to finish, and you won't be back.

"So you admit it?" He asks loudly. "I mean not that you are hiding it. Look at that Miu Miu bag. A girl like would only dream about it."

You look down at your bag. Bag that was a gift from your grandparents. "Why are you so mad if I wear designer or if I date someone from the club?" You were about to walk out, not feeling like listening to his crap.

"Raphinha was right, you act like a fucking prude but in reality you are nothing but a slut."

You turn to him. Was that what Raphinha talked to you about when he attacked you? "What did you just say?"

"And now you are deaf." He laughs.

"Is this about me rejecting your invitation?" You ask mad. Was he doing all that because you told him he wasn't your type? "Marcus, this is fucked up. Did you even know what Raphinha did to me?"

"Whatever it was, he probably paid you enough to get something nice, huh?" He says, getting closer. "Did you enjoy it?"

You back off, trying to get away from you. "Don't don't even know what you are talking about."

"You rejected me but decided to fuck a forthy year old dude?"

You don't understand nothing at this point. What he thinks you are doing. "You are confusing things, I'm not doing any of that."

"You just admitted to do it." He yells. You back a little more. "A married guy with kids, fucking slut." He yells.

You feel like you were about to start crying from the anxiety this is giving you. "I didn't do that." You yell back.

The door opens up. A frowny Ferran and Pedri walk in. Seeing the scene and how you are almost cornered up.

"What is going on?" Ferran asks. "Are you okay, Y/n?"

Pedri doesn't even care about answering questions. He walks over to you and shields you with his body.

"Back off." He warns. "No sé quien carajos te crees pero no tienes ningún derecho a gritarle, imbecil." (I don't know who te fuck you think you are but you have no right to yell at her, asshole) he's the one getting closer now, doing the same he was doing to you.

"Obviously, you two are defending her." He laughs. "Did he sucked your dicks too?"

Pedri doesn't need to hear anything else. His fist impacts Marcus. Making him fall over. "I'm not going to let you talk about her at all. You watch your fucking mouth."

Ferran grabs you by the shoulders, taking you out of the room. You don't want Pedri to get in trouble.

"Can you make sure he doesn't punch him again?" You ask Ferran. "I don't want Pedri having repercussions because of him."

Ferran nods, going back inside. You can hear Pedri yelling at Marcus. He was mad and the adrenaline from the game was giving him the attitude.

He was a calm dude. It's not easy to pass him off, let alone get physical with him. But today was Marcus lucky day because Pedri was not taking any shit.

Ferran drags Pedri out of the room. Mad face softens when his eyes lay on you. "Guapa." He hugs you. "Are you okay?"

"I am. Thank you for saving me." You kiss his collarbone. "I'm so confused about why he was yelling at me."

"He won't even dare to even come back after the break. And if he does, Ferran promised him that he would run him over."

You smile. Extending your hand to where Ferran is. He grabs your hand, and you pull him to the hug between Pedri and you.

Carlos, who is just coming back from the bathroom and sees that scene, joins without saying much.

"Why are we hugging?" He asks after a few. Making Pedri, Ferran and you laugh.

🪷🪷🪷

"Two goals, baby." You say, hugging you very sweaty boyfriend. "You did amazing. I'm so proud."

He smiles like crazy, his first goals with the national team, and you surprised him by coming to see his game.

"I played too." Ferran says, watching you and Pedro hug.

Pedro scuff. "Maybe get a girlfriend, capullo."

"Excuse me? Y/n, let me tell you that without me insisting that he asked you out, you wouldn't even be here right now." He leaves, pretending to be mad.

You laugh when you notice Pedri blushing at Ferrans confession. "Well, let's thank him." You say, kissing his lips.

"We can also thank a very straightforward girl who asked me what was the status of our relationship when we were cuddling in bed and watching a movie."

"A smart mind, in my opinion."

You two walk over to the interview side. Since he scored two goals, some news channels wanted him to give the exclusive after the game.

"I'm very proud, I can't wait for Germany." He says to the camera.

"How is your support circle? Will you have your family and friends at maybe one of the games?"

"I have amazing support, my parents, my brother, my girlfriend, my friends, and the fans who always motivate me to be better."

"Girlfriend? Wow, lucky girl. Imagine that the start of today is your boyfriend." The interviewer laughed.

Pedri locks his eyes with you. "Actually, I'm the lucky one." He says.

[mswyrr]

Qimir consistently aches to see the pain the dark side causes Osha and I believe this will lead him to resist Plagueis' plans in s2.

His first moment of regret and resistance is, in fact, at the very completion of his seduction! He gets Osha to put the helmet on - and it hurts her. It's causing her pain, so he fights to rescue her from that. Even though, presumably, this was (with Plagueis, whether knowingly or unknowingly) the goal.

Let's backtrack a second and reflect on the seduction itself. The show creator/lead writer, Leslye Headland, has said that it wasn't manipulation on Qimir's part, that he meant everything he said. Two relevant quotes from the same interview with her on this point:

"So, in my opinion, Osha is extremely in denial about her own anger at the Jedi and at her father, i.e. Sol. She's in extreme denial about that because she feels like she's not allowed to be angry, and she's in an enormous amount of pain over her sister and their history, and she also feels like she's not allowed to feel that. So, someone coming in and saying, “Actually, feeling all those things is not only okay but actually could restore your spiritual foundation,” is almost too much. I don't think that's manipulation. I think he's telling her the truth."

"[T]he relationship between Lo and Jen in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon was an influence in the writer's room. We referenced that relationship over and over again. The intentional parallel is that they are equals and their relationship is earned through mutual vulnerability, not intimidation or manipulation."

However, someone can be themselves misled and so mislead you too, from a place of sincerity! That is, perhaps, the most heartbreaking way of all to mislead someone. Qimir is lost - the Jedi path damaged him and he (like so many Jedi before him) snapped to the Sith path. It's not working for him, it's causing him pain likely, but he believes it and shares from that place. But the moment Qimir sees this path is causing Osha pain, he feels compelled to do something to help her.

Once he gets the helmet off Osha, Qimir seems relieved when he learns the vision Osha *thinks* she saw, of Mae "killing a Jedi without a weapon." (Which Qimir somehow knows is the goal here - to get Mae or Osha to fall - presumably because Plagueis either gave him the vision or told him directly to try to get that to happen?)

He's content with the idea that Mae will be the one to do it, fulfilling the vision/directive, and actively seeks to make it happen from this point on. He tries to talk her up into doing it at the pivotal moment, but that's not what she's about, her feelings about Sol are not so out of balance for her to "fall" as the Jedi and Sith understand it. She feels anger but also wants justice most, not revenge.

I read disappointment in how Manny plays his reaction to Mae's "No" - disappointment at "failing" sure but also I think it's related to the fact that he wanted it to be Mae, not Osha.

This was cemented for me by the way he played Qimir's reaction to Osha's fall. He's not celebratory, though he's just accomplished what he had been trying to since he began teaching Mae! He seems stricken, actually. There's no pleasure or satisfaction in his "success"! Witnessing Osha's pain only makes him feel compassion and bow his head in sorrow. This "success" is ashes in his mouth.

As a mutual on Twitter pointed out to me (♥️_LokiDokie!), Leslye's commentary in this interview supports this reading of Qimir as grief-stricken by what he's seen:

"Then it's like this passing through, stepping over the threshold, that actually will bring them closer together, which is so interesting. But the motivation I gave to Manny in that moment — in theater, we would call it dramaturgically — for, “Why is he stepping over to do that,” because it said it in the script, was, “You have been in this position. If you have a red lightsaber, you have felt this level of despair, rage, and dejection. So go over there and let her know that you have had that experience.” And he just did that beautiful thing. I was like, “Jesus Christ.”"

His reaction is a stark contrast to Mae, who never fell to the dark side, and doesn't understand what she's seeing - she mistakes this for Osha being liberated from Jedi mindwashing. THIS is what Qimir's face would look like if he thought this was a good thing and was happy about it:

The contrast is quite stark.

Qimir's sorrow for Osha continues as he attempts to comfort her and then sees she's bled the saber.

Intriguingly, Qimir has the helmet on and is "hiding" emotionally when he wipes Mae's memory. We don't get to see how that pain effects him. But the pattern throughout the episode is that when Osha hurts he aches too.

In the final scene, Qimir approaches Osha, again, without triumph at any of this. He's gotten everything he thought he wanted, but he looks at her and I read concern, sorrow, wariness.

He steps closer to her and takes her hand supportively, continuing his pattern (3 times in this episode!) of physically coming close to help/comfort her when she's hurting.

Then he raises his chin with resolve, but no happiness. They are facing the future, but they are "doomed" on the Sith path. Romantic love cannot live there anymore than it can thrive on the arid, repressed Jedi path. I think he suspects that - whether or not he's knowingly in league with Plagueis. Whatever is coming, the Sith path can only cause Osha more and more pain...

He cannot help but ache with her when he sees Osha in pain and want to help her. I cannot imagine an s2 where they continue down the Sith path without him breaking under the strain of watching the pain it causes her - he could endure it himself but seeing her do it? He'll snap. And that romantic love--something BOTH the Jedi and Sith reject and denigrate--that will help them escape imo. Here's a quote from Leslye I interpret as supportive of this reading. She references how the Sith path is inimical to romantic love and then alludes to the tantalizing possibility of escape:

HEADLAND: Oh, yeah! Again, they’re Sith. It's a different vibe. To me, it's gonna hit different because of their allegiance and who they are. So, yes, it is framed as romantic, but I do think, again, it's not gonna turn out great. I think if he's training her, “One to hold the power, one to crave it.” So they're starting off as equals, but what's gonna happen? Like in Romeo and Juliet, it's amazing because right at the beginning they're like, “Okay, these two die. Let's start the play.” As you're watching this incredible love story unfold, and it's one of the most beautifully iconic plays ever written, in the back of your mind, you're like, “This is not going to turn out well.” I want to clarify: They are not necessarily doomed or destined to fail as a team. But the Sith rule of two denotes a power imbalance. Which clearly, due to the final shot, is not their relationship. Also, Plagueis complicates their journey as Sith, because we know his apprentice is eventually Palpatine. They will not defeat him.

I feel pretty confident that the love he feels for her is pivotal to their journey away from the Sith path and what Plagueis wants for Osha - both because Leslye knows this is not a good path and because of the deep sense of care and connection Qimir already feels for Osha.

Combine this with Leslye's comments and imo it being unlikely that they'll repeat the same pattern with Qimir & Vernestra that they did with Sol & Osha and just the overall "sameness" that would come of hammering the endless cycle in more and I just don't buy that as the direction we're headed.

It is possible to tell it as a relentless tragedy and keep hammering the endless, inescapable cycles but, while tragedies are valid (I enjoy hotd!), even they have a narrative form more varied than that usually. And this IS a "coming of age" psychological/mythic Star Wars story at the end of the day. And one Leslye (happily gay married with a child!) drew on her own experiences (with religious trauma) to write... she didn't end up trapped in darkness why would a young protagonist like Osha have to?

Here's the full Leslye quote about religious trauma, since I believe it's vital to understanding where she and the writing team are going to take Osha, Mae, and Qimir:

You have a play, Cult of Love, coming to Broadway this fall. It’s about a Christian family gathering for the holidays. It’s inspired by your own experiences with your family. You were working on it at the same time as The Acolyte, from what I can tell. Did they influence each other? Our director, Trip Cullman, and I were talking about how it’s called Cult of Love because all cults have a dream, and the dream is really beautiful. Even Jim Jones started out trying to desegregate Indianapolis. This family in the play has this dream that they follow to the logical conclusion, which is that they never achieve it. I was raised Christian. Christianity is the ultimate dream. It’s a beautiful concept that God becomes human in order to love you more. Then you look at what Christianity has done to the world: colonization, genocide. It was a beautiful dream that doesn’t justify the human action that comes along. The Jedi also live in a dream, a dream they believe everybody has. In The Acolyte, the pilot ends with the line “An acolyte kills the dream.” The drama is to wake up to the fact that the dream doesn’t exist.

I think the point is for Osha and Qimir to wake up to the fact that both the Jedi and Sith "dreams" do not exist. They are toxic mirrors of each other - and Osha and Mae were born into a culture (the culture of the Coven and their mothers) that didn't see the force in the binary way the Jedi&Sith both do. Mae, who remembered and kept to the pov of the Coven, never fell to the dark side in a Sith way --she felt anger but balanced with a desire for justice, even when she killed-- it was only her sister, taught repression and self-denial by the Jedi, who did. Qimir and Osha have a conceptual/spiritual escape route open to them if they wish to use it.

Finally, Leslye has said that she's written Qimir as her "shadow" (in the Jungian sense) and that she feels close to him - and what does he want? "I want freedom." I don't think someone driven by that desire is going to just surrender himself AND the woman he loves to Plagueis the Creeper.

My wife was like, “What do you want to say?” I was like, “I wanna say that people don't want me to exist as a gay woman, as a woman in this particular space, working in this wild sandbox.” There was a whole crew of people who believed in me, but deep down, I felt like, “I am unaccepted for who I am because of what I believe in and wanting to wield my power the way I'd like without having to answer to the legion of people that just exist out there.” By the way, I think everybody feels this way. I think that's why it resonates when you're honest about yourself, and you get personal about it. When he says, “I want freedom,” that's what I want. I just want freedom. I want to be able to just be out there and be myself and be the type of artist I want to be without having to answer to anybody. That's why I feel so close to him.

[cassandraclare]

*sighs a bit* Okay. Guys. I have been asked this question a lot, and answered it a lot. I don't know how to give a better answer — Dru & Ty&Kit share significance as main characters — so I guess I'll talk a little about comparison and structures.

First, all series have different structures. I don't think it's super useful or predictive to try to map an upcoming, unknown book series onto an existing series. In TLH the main character was Cordelia, everyone else was secondary to her, and people's roles and the significance of them altered from book to book. It was a big ensemble cast and they mostly stayed put in London especially in book 1.

TWP focuses on a smaller group of people. It also has a very different structure. In book one, Dru is not with Kit and Ty. They are in different places, both of which have their own stories that are significant to the plot. There is no way to see Place One without following Dru. There is no way to see Place Two without following Kit and Ty.

I know that TWP is a long way off. I know there are people who are very angry with me that there's such a gap, but there isn't anything currently I can do about that, or about the fact that I don't yet have the schedule for my upcoming books. That rests in the hands of several different publishers who must coordinate the release times and production schedules for four different series. I am not withholding any information about when these books come out. I simply don't know it yet.

I understand that TWP being a long way off makes for anxiety, and that those who are worried Kit and Ty will somehow be secondary are looking for tiny clues in microscopic details — micro-reading the of placement of the word "and" in my newsletter and such — that are meaningless, but I get that it all comes from anxiety. (FTR, those worried Dru will be secondary are equally anxious.)

I think there is only so much I can say. Because there's a big gap between TLH and TWP everything I do say or every image or hint about it is freighted with a weight of assumption it can't really support. Anxiety is always going to trump reassurance. And truly, at the end of the day, if you only care about Kit and Ty and find the idea of a Dru story tiresome, you will feel like they got shafted because when you absolutely hate a plotline, you will always feel like it's taking up way too much space. That's just how our minds work.

I've been doing this long enough that I know no book can survive a hostile reading. I know that Book Three of a trilogy is the one people hate until they don't. (When Clockwork Princess came out people hated it so much I considered quitting writing!) I know that it's wonderful to love a character but can also be a problem for people when I put out books that aren't about that particular character or dynamic. I know that for a lot of people, Sword Catcher and Ragpicker King are just tiresome things that have no business on my schedule because they're not Shadowhunter books. And I get it. But I also have to block it out, because I've been writing a long time, and I've gotten to a point where I know that I have to write the thing I want to be writing, because if I don't, if I sit down and try to force myself to write something I'm not feeling like writing at that time, I'll be making myself physically and mentally sick. And that's no good for anyone, really.

I suppose the positive thing is that, while this would not have been true five years ago, I am at the place where I want very much to be writing Wicked Powers. I missed these characters and am glad to be back with them. I consider this a story in which there are three main characters. And that is all I can say right now because it's all that I know.

(And this was much more of a general response to a lot of things than a specific response to this question, but I did feel like it was stuff that I needed to say. Creators are at the end of the day, just people. Sometimes we are powerless to reassure. Sometimes we are tired. Sometimes we are wrong. Sometimes we try things and they don't work. Sometimes we can't explain to you what our story is going to make you feel, because only reading it is going to tell you that. This may be one of those times.)

[michelle-is-writing]

Surprise, Surprise, Greg House

Word Count: 1.1k~

Surprising Greg at work is always fun. Most of the time, he's messing around with the items on his desk until I walk in which ultimately causes him to perk up right away. I'm always happy to see him, and going by the smile that pops up on his face when he first sees me, Greg is happy to see me too. Plus, it always helps that we've been together for several years too.

"House, you have a guest," Wilson states, quickly popping his head into the doorway of Greg's office before popping right back out. Watching him walk back to the elevators, I wave at Wilson before opening Greg's door.

"Surprising," I hear Greg mindlessly mutter before I walk in. Once he sees me, he lightly smiles and changes his words. "Not surprising," He corrects himself, sitting up in his chair. "But pleasant."

"I brought you lunch," I tell him, gesturing to the bag in my hand with a smile. Placing the paper bag on his desk, I sit down in the chair across from him with his desk separating us. "That way you don't have to steal anyone else's."

"You know me so well," Greg chides, placing the magazine in his hands down before opening the bag of food. Taking all of the contents out of the bag reveals two sandwiches and two bags of chips with a bottled drink for each one. "Funny," He notes. "These are the things I would have stolen from Wilson."

Laughing at his sad, yet true comment, I separate everything out and place a Reuben sandwich in front of each of us, Greg already digging into one of the yellow bags of potato chips. "I'm glad I got to come see you today," I confess, the sight of the food making me feel a little sick. "I have some... great news to share."

"Oh, really?" Greg asks, looking up at me. I nod, smiling as he pushes his chair back a little. "Well, then why don't you come over here and tell me all about it?" He suggests with that ever so sly smirk.

Knowing what that means, I gently roll my eyes and stand from my chair before walking over to Greg and sitting on his lap. Instantly, he wraps his arms around me and holds me close, leaning up a little to kiss my lips. This is one of the very few ways Greg shows his love. He always says it's because he gets to hold me closer to him, but I think it's just because I'm sitting on his lap.

"You know," he begins his sentence, nibbling at my neck. "With one simple movement, you instantly have me at your will. How odd is that?" Greg questions me, his voice sultry and low. Smiling at him, I lightly giggle before pushing him away enough so he can look straight at me.

"Greg, I need to tell you something," I state, my voice a bit serious. Even though I'm trying to keep a straight voice without letting my excitement show through, I keep my smile in hopes of him not getting worried. I hope this news finds him well, and it doesn't make him mad or angry... I don't know what I would do if he left me because of it.

Leaning back in his swivel chair to look at me, he continues smiling while running his hand up and down my side. "Go on," he encourages me, his blue eyes staring into mine. "I'm listening, my sweet."

My cheeks slightly blush at the endearment before I look away, sudden nervousness hitting me. "I'm, uh, I'm..." Just as I begin to speak, I choke up before sighing. "I'm pregnant, Greg," I fully answer him, having the guts to look him straight in the eye as I do so.

He takes a moment to listen to me, only to fully realize what I'm saying within seconds. In shock, he stares at me with wide eyes before breaking out into a nervous chuckle. "You're serious, right?" He asks, making my eyebrows furrow. My reaction causes him to become worried as his smile drops. "Please don't be joking," Greg begs, placing his hands on my arms.

His words slightly... befuddle me. Is the cold and emotionless House actually excited about me being pregnant? For him to question me to make sure I'm not joking makes me... I don't know what it makes me actually.

Does Greg want a child? I know we didnt plan this little one, but there's no going back now. I mean, Greg is quite a few years older than me and I would've never thought he'd want a kid this late in life, but Gregory House is Gregory House. If there's one thing that signifies Gregory House, it's that he's weird and unusual, and he never conforms to what is socially acceptable.

"No, I'm not joking, Greg," I tell him, placing his hands on my stomach. "There's a little baby right here," With Greg staring up at me with big eyes and an equally big smile, tears quickly make their way to my eyes. "You're going to be a father," I whisper, leaning forward and placing my forehead against his.

A few moments of silence pass before Greg grins and wraps his arms tighter around me. In a quick turn of events, he stands up with our feet planted on the ground and his arms still around me, a giggle falling from my lips as he does so. Before I know it, Greg is moving my shirt up to place his hands on my barely swollen tummy, resting them there as I hug him to me as well. “Thank you,” He murmurs, smiling before connecting our lips in another kiss. At the same time, he moves his hands to my waist to hold me there, his hold reflecting the passion behind our kiss.

[cheeseceli]

We cry together

Pairing: Idol Hyunjin × non Idol Gn!Reader

Genre: hurt/comfort, drabble

Request: Can I request reader who’s an en empath and when she senses that hyunjin has been sad lately she starts crying and then that makes hyunjin cry too and finally open up to her about what’s wrong😭🩷

Warnings: none I can think of

A/n: I think you requested this like last year💀 I'm sorry for taking so long but hopefully you'll like it!

Hyunjin hasn't been himself lately, and you knew that better than anyone else.

His eyes were darker than usual, like he was feeling tired all the time. He'd barely joke around anymore or do his dramatic antics. You knew he wasn't being his normal self, however you didn't know why.

"I'm fine, don't worry" was his usual response to any approach you'd have. Just like now. A whole week had passed and he still was walking around like a zombie - a zombie who'd always fake a smile to try to make you feel a little bit relieved.

You didn't know what else to do. You tried to talk just to hear lies about how he was feeling alright. You tried to comfort him just to realise that he was wearing a barrier around him. You tried to be there for him just to realise that he himself wasn't there, nor anywhere. He was so inside his mind that the real world was inexistent to him.

With this dilemma inside your mind, the whole day had already passed and it was time to bid goodbye. He didn't look at you though, and his "goodnight" was such a whisper that you doubt he meant to say that at all.

Now that's a funny thing about loving someone. You don't only have feelings for them, you have their feelings. If they are happy you're gonna share their smiles. If they are angry you're gonna share their screams. And if they are sad, even if you don't exactly know the reason, you're bound to share their tears.

So when you hug Hyunjin as a farewell, you can't help but cry. You didn't mean to, but the more you cried the more helpless you felt and just tried to find comfort in your lover by hugging him tighter, hoping that you wouldn't disturb him. However, your sobs made Hyunjin come back to earth and back to you.

"Love?" he asked with a soft voice "are you crying?"

You didn't reply at first. Oh, how embarrassing it was to cry like that for no apparent reason. But Hyunjin took your face in his hands and looked at you with the kindest eyes to ever exist. It was the first time in the whole week that he looked at you properly. You didn't realise how much you missed it.

"What happened?"

"I should be the one asking this, Hyunjin. You've been weird for God knows how long and you refuse to tell me what's wrong."

A mixture of confusion and guilt showed up in his eyes before he dried your face with his thumb "You're crying because of me?"

You smiled. Not because you found it funny, but because you couldn't believe the situation itself.

"I just... I just want you to know that you can trust me. I'm here. For whatever you may need or want. Even if I can't solve the problem, I hope that at least we can cry together."

Hyunjin hugged you closer before you could see his tears forming. It was kinda contradicting, really. But for Hyunjin, the way you were already crying together ended up solving the problem in his head, at least for enough time for him to breathe again.

"Do you think I could sleep here tonight?" His voice was a little bit muffled, his face in the crook of your neck, but his words resonated in your skin. You felt he was little to little coming back to life.

"Of course. Why's that?"

"I wanna trust you tonight. I'll tell you everything. Just let me be here with you, please."

"Always."

Reblogs and feedback are always appreciated!

Dividers by @enchanthings