#and its like. man i wanna relate. i DONT wanna feel just as alien to that as i do to straight experiences. but i kinda do :(

[sporesgalaxy]

anyone else get a little sad sometimes hearing about queer experiences you didnt have because they werent even on your radar bc of other problems

like man. i already considered many alarming thoughts to be separate from my Self as a survival tactic by 5th grade. the gay thoughts were not catching up to me and I knew it. being closeted never felt all that weird because I'd already been keeping it a secret for years that I truly honestly thought demons from hell were going to kill me sometimes. the effects of childhood ocd are bizarre

[herboretum]

big ol text abt me being aroace so🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅ow oka🍅🍅🍅🍅y i get it i know 🍅🍅🍅🍅ow I Talk so much abt being aroace🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅 i prmise this is the last🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅 time 🍅🍅🍅🍅DAMN okay CHILL🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅read if u wanna 🍅🍅🍅ow OW!!!!!!🍅

ough man sometimes i wish i wasnt aroacespec for the sake of my own wellbeing yanno,,,,,,

its been physically paining me (since the start of the year realistically) knowing im incapable of loving another person romantically, of being unable to feel that passion for someone the way devoted partners would for their other half

it makes (and has made) me cry knowing i wont have that connection probably ever! that i just. cant love on that level! it kills me, genuinely, just not being able to have those moments where i can lean all my trust to one person, to have moments of vulnerability with someone. to be able to have lovesick days or gaze into their eyes or be able to simply reciprocate an "i love you" that they know is more than that simple statement. it fucking kills me man it makes me sick to my stomach

i dont know why. i never chose to be like this!!!! why couldnt i just be normal man!!! theres nothing wrong with me yet theres everything that could have been better! sometimes i get so jealous of people i know who are in really loving relationships. how they can just ramble on about how they love their partner to their core, that every imperfection they see is a beauty to behold. why cant i experience that? like genuinely what the fuck happened with me??

i feel like nobody ever talks about how alienating being aroace can sometimes feel. i feel like what im experiencing should not exist. im aroace not because i chose to be, but because i simply am, and i really hate that about me. theres so many people celebrating and while i can relate sometimes, i also feel like a sack of hopeless shit too!! im like a paradox man idk its wild how actually unfathomable this situation i am in. it doesnt feel real i feel like im contradicting myself 24/7

this is what i mean when i say i live vicariously through other people and my projections onto fiction. i am just that unable to not contradict myself in real fucking life. its so stupid man i fucking hate being here

anyways i digresss:3 not really. ive just been in this weird middle state for over half a year and today just kinda felt like a snapping point for literally no reason ?!?!:; i love being aroace. i really do. but god sometimes it just hurts me knowing theres a version of me enjoying a better life than i am

and lowkey if im gonna theorize, i genuinely think my issue stems from my inability to properly socialize with other people: i am just that fucking pathetic. me being scared of interactions has led me to become avoidant of others, which in turn has probably caused me to act like this im gonna aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaago fishing

[thefreakhouseband]

Welcome to the Freak House!

About Us

Audrey Arson

I'm the oldest of the band. I'm a bit of a self-proclaimed older sister to the others and I feel super protective of them. When I'm not making music with the band you can usually find me working on my comic or some other artistic pursuit. I'm a chronically exhausted college student. You can tell what songs I wrote by them having a more jazzy or melancholy tone to them or just being bat-shit off the walls insane. Some of my inspirations are MCR, Scene Queen, , Set It Off, and Demi Lovato (for some reason).

-Your resident garbage girl

Butchface

I’m that guy with the neon green hair in the blog’s pfp lol. pronouns are he/him, xe/xem/xyr, and it/its. I take a lot of influence from older punk rock and, surprisingly, country and folk music. my favorite bands are My Chemical Romance, Oingo Boingo, They Might Be Giants, The Cure, Talking Heads, Bikini Kill, Shilpa Ray, Black Sabbath, Rainbow, Iron Maiden, The Magnetic Fields, The Daniel Pemberton TV Orchestra, Lemon Demon, Man or Astro-Man, Radiohead (not in a pretentious way, I swear), Will Wood, Creedence Clearwater Revival… oh boy, there’s a lot. I like music! I tend to disappear at unpredictable intervals due to chronic pain/fatigue and parental restrictions, but I always come back. I like writing songs about things I’m passionate about, which is often personal, sometimes political, and every now and then a ballad about freaky-looking deep sea creatures. or weevils. I keep my dad’s old stenobook by my bedside to write lyrics in - he wrote lyrics for the Panama City punk bands he was in in 1990-ish in there, and I figured I could put it to good use again after all these years. he’s cool with it. see you around, and stay safe out there 🪲

Harley Homicide

I'm sassy, I'm trashy and (if you pay me enough) I'll let you put it in my ass-y. I'm the band's second oldest and the token British person. I use any pronouns, I literally don't care what you call me xx. My music taste is all over the place, having been raised by a metalhead and a former chav during a time where pop punk and emo were more mainstream. I'd say my biggest inspirations in terms of performing are Freddie Mercury and Ronnie James Dio. You'll be able to tell which songs are written by me because they're shit! I'm not much good at writing, but I'm great at partying like I'm Paris Hilton. When I'm not doing band stuff, you can find me shopping, watching/reading/playing anything DC comics related or just sorta... Staring into space. I don't do much, but I'm still your fave member fer sure! Thanks for visiting The Freakhouse! We hope you enjoy your stay!

Xoxo Harlz <3

Dart Darling

Hi I'm Dart, I'm genderfluid (any pronouns), and I'm from under the ground at your local graveyard! I'm one of the youngest, and that's super tragic because I'm an undead zombie who died from being too damn glamorous. My idol is Melissa Marie and i love the Millionaires. Also, my ghostly tendencies give me a lot of appreciation for the dramatic, and as well as all things scene and crunkcore I love theatre, cabaret, and steampunk. I've been producing music for about a year now so if the synths crunching, just know it was me, tapping away and not understanding what the equalizer does. I'm bringing you Dead Girl Couture 25/8, 366. Don't mind all the Sanrio merch around the Freakhouse, I started a cult for Hello Kitty! I mean church. You should definitely join us 😁

Til death do we party,

-Dart <3

GRACIEEEE

YOOO WASSUP!!! X3 My namez GRACE! (if you dont know me, pls call me Grace, not Gracie)

I'm gendersylphen (he/they/neos) and I'm a super cool alien with adhd from OUTER SPACEEEE! My fav colors are all of them except brown, my special interests are space and doraemon, and I LOVE SCENE SM! Crunkcore 4 LYFEEE! I wanna be an astronaut when I grow up! Also I'm the youngest here 💀💀💀💀💀 (btw im a minor so plz don't be a weirdo, tyyyy)

I'm mostly new to music and I'm SUPER excited!!! X) Ik this is gonna be rllyrlly fun!!! For me, my music stuff is gonna be super bouncy, upbeat, happy, optimistic, full of rhymes, so tht's when yk smth's by me! My fav bands/artists are Amy Can Flyy, Green Day, Nikasaur, 4*Town (4townie 4 eva!!! Aaron T is best boy) and a LOT of other stuff.

When I'm not with tha band, you can find me playing with my sibs (including my dog), doing stuff with my homiez, reading/watching Doraemon or abt space, or doing idk whatever bc I do alot. XP

So ye! Thts a bit abt me! Tysm for reading abt us, may God bless u, follow ur dreams, and have a super duper fun day! 😄

[isaacathom]

its ds9 time once again, because like every two weeks i remember im meant to be watching it. s2e11

fun opening, unclear on the vibe but it is fun i guess. lot of essentialism going on-

hello obrien? hi. oh keikos in this episode. hopefully for good reasons. okay so we're playing downball with rackets. squash? is this space squash? space squash. i understand now.

i do like that the squad has a range of relations to each other, namely that noone actually seems to like bashir except for like, i wanna say dax, and im not sure thats genuine friendship as much as it was pity. i just think its fun. only person on this station who genuinely likes the guy is garrick, i think. and crucially that bashir is completely unaware that people don't like him that much. cause it lets him just keep going :) hello! and obriens over here like 'jesus christ this fucking guy'

i dont know what the plot of this episode is, but i do think this unwell alien immediately divulging his life story to this guy is incredibly funny

both of these actors feel very familiar in a way i cannot place. who are you fuckers. PRINCE HUMPER- wait no while thats a fascinating role i wouldnt know the fucker off that. no way i wouldve recognised him from that. i think maybe he just has one of those faces. ditto the dead guy. wild shit.

obriens impersonation of bashir was fucking hilarious.

while checking out humperdincks wikipedia i have been reminded of the actual plot of the episode, because netflix's summaries are honestly kind of rubbish half the time, and i see it is beginning. though i guess obriens sole opponent for space squash being the sector champion is the first point of bonkers luck, and 'no fucking salt' is the second. or sauce.

okay so the way the orb works is that if you win, it gives you good luck at someone elses expense. martus gets out of prison while bashir struggles to find a sauce dispenser. obriens gonna have a fucking heart attack while he gets rich, things of this nature.

martus, very charismatic fellow.

obrien mate surely theres a treadmill somewhere you dont gotta jog in the prom- hang on hasnt odo yelled at people for running in the promenade? obrien man being on the fucking executive committee doesnt get you exemptions. okay maybe it does but still come on. (bridge crew was the word i was looking for, "executive committee" isaac)

this woman is ALSO really familiar. who are you. noone! just another of those faces! jesus im being played for a chump. have i been struck by the bad luck orb????

so bashir isnt naive, per se, but he is focusing on one specific thing - obriens ego - and not on the fact obrien just doesnt like him lmao. incredible work. love you

hi sisko, been a hot minute.

"you begged me to stay" "i didnt beg i blackmailed you" sisko man youre the best

genuinely though like, the dead alien man that was probably less that he looked familiar and more a vague impression from the makeup, but martus and roana seem SO familiar, roana just has a vibe, its bizarre.

stepped on a ball midflight, exceptional.

i do enjoy that obrien just stomps around casually.

oh its just straight racquetball? oh so when i said it was squash i wasnt that fair off. ill be fucking damned. still space racquetball mind, also space something.

bashir looks so pissed to be swindled into this fight, like hhhhh i hate having a moral compass. i love that for him.

the running joke of people telling martus their whole life stories is genuinely quite funny.

head immediately into a tit, incredible work martus, and the wife arrives, the luck of the galaxy baby

WHO DOES ROANA REMIND ME OF. my god! fuck! like shes just so FAMILIAR. its gonna drive me nuts i have absolutely no way of figuring it out because shes predominantly a tv actress, and further that im not sure ive seen the person im thinking of in a movie or anything, just a gifset???? god. fuck man.

frame the fucking obrien/keiko scene, excellent stuff, genuinely love it, really sweet just MWAH. very nice.

bashir going ... okay so you tried to drug me, first of all, and NOW youre trying to guilt me into either doing it myself or playing like shit to fix the match. oh yea bashir. just going :) you guilted me once, quark, not a second time, that shits hot.

yeah the ep kinda bites. ohhh alsia. oh lmao.

yeah that episode wasnt good but bits were funny. shrug

[explosivepies]

i just think its so funny how i basically break my own heart over them and want them so badly, while i dont think that they would.

the thing that turns me off the most about them is the fact they told me they dont like body hair on women at all.

and while right now i'm not the most certain about the whole woman thing, i am certain that i will simply not hurt myself to look smooth for some idiot. and i'm aware that they would only see me as a woman, which i don't necessarily have a problem with, as long as they are okay with me not being womanly about 85% of the time.

starting from my own brain and experience: if they really want to have me, they will take me, hair or no hair.

and even if they would like me and accept me and want me, there are aspects to them that should give me the hugest ick and that i would feel guilty for tolerating, but also in the same breath, aspects that are so common in basically everyone i've seen so far. so in this sense, i'm caught between being attracted to (and potentially dating) people with admittedly shitty views, and just... being single.

the issue with the latter is that i'm bored of it. i want to cuddle someone, i want to fuck someone, i want someone to talk to at the end of a long day, i want help and i want to offer help, and i crave romantic love, even though admitting that makes me want to puke.

so should i settle?

don't "yas queen" me. i don't wanna be told that i'm a strong independent [redacted] who don't need no man. i'm aware.

i'm also done being strong, it's exhausting. i've been strong my whole life and even though i'm fully capable of protecting myself, please just please, i also want someone to do that when i'm tired of it.

and of course i'll be there for them, when they feel like bored or tired of being strong, of standing up, of whatever. i will hold them close and burn anyone who comes for them.

however, the person i have a crush on, also gives me the ick with another thing: they seem to be the edgy person i was at 17. i genuinely feel, in some aspects, way more mature than them, and they are older than me. previously when i had crushes on people, they were the more mature ones.

usually it's at this point of doubting basically everything about relationships and crushes, that i decide "okay fuck it, it's hookup culture for me then". but i don't want that. sure, it helps for the part when someone puts his dick in me (it's way easier with men) and i'll be honest, i loved that and i want more. but it's also not worth the effort of talking to someone, of going through god knows how mny profiles, and definitely not worth the risk of them wanting to smoke while at my place.

then i think, for this purpose we also hve the certified office fuckboy, i'm pretty sure he'd be glad to, AND THEN i think "but my crush would know and would be disgusted", and i wouldn't blame them. i mean, they told me basically, of how some guys at the office talk about women, of how workplace relations are often disgustingly public, and first, i want none of that, second, i especially don't want that someone else hears.

though, i guess, if the pffice fuckboy were to talk, i could reciprocate and spread more gossip. ahhh, the toxicity. i guess that would also bring problems + alienate my crush.

no, i want what my old german teacher had, a "seasonl partner" who stays for a predetermined amount of time and then it's done.

i want to have someone for 6 months, and after 6 months, maybe revise it, or just leave and start again.

i also want someone that would fuck me brainless in my lunch break so that i can relax a bit.

damn.

life is hard.

[nikki-in-miraland]

my oh my

take this as you will, im tired and i cant enunciate my thoughts well ever

[bitegore]

something incredibly alienating about everyone hearing i got hashtag issues and being like "oh i can relate" and then sending me shit about anxiety

i was fortunate enough that anxiety is like the one issue i never got. that and spinelessness, i had to learn to stop trying to jump down people's throats for walking into rooms i was in as opposed to minimizing all my shit for other people. i'm super down with this, for the record, i like not being a doormat and i got nothing against having mostly-working fear responses that just like to trip in response to my brain literally making up a guy and putting them in the corner. like i dont mind that this is how i am, i am not complaining, i am glad. i dont get anxiety, i have no anxiety around almost anything, its good

but idk something about someone being like OOH YEAH I SEE YOU I GET YOU I UNDERSTAND YOUR PROBLEMS and then boiling it down to... anxiety. feels bad man. like no i see nonexistent things and have voices that tell me to do shit, thats what i got when i say i have "problems" and "eels in my brain" and occasionally "kind of fucking psycho" and it feels fucking weird when someone tries to boil that down into "oh, right, anxiety" because they really are SUCH different experiences. even the intrusive thoughts are different from anxiety and those are even Unequivocally Negative And Alarming (as opposed to the hallucinations which aren't lmfao).

this happens with a lot of the other disorders too, idk why people dont wanna just take me at my word when i say what i got is some sort of psychotic thing and like maybe a personality disorder for ~flavor~ (read: cyclical mania and sleepytireds not explicable by just adhd, some other shit im not putting on the internet) but like. i definitely dont have a major depressive anything. i definitely don't have an anxiety disorder. if i get anyone giving me advice for social anxiety (talking to strangers is RELAXING i love social situations i love meeting strangers and i love talking to people who have never met me, does this sound like social anxiety to you) again i will bite. i am sick of it.

this is not about anyone here for the record, i'm vageuing real life people right now

[hometownrockstar]

sorry if this looks like im over-valuing internet strangers' thoughts and opinions on my personal identity to the viewers but, does anyone think its "weird" the way i talk abt nonbinary characters/hcs, or gender/pronouns esp my own, or like dorothea lol. Like lemme explain. im a fully binary gay trans man (right now. ive never questioned or doubted it before but that doesnt mean im not gonna deny myself if my feelings ever change, and i dont question anything currently) but i sometimes wonder if people doubt my own word abt my identity just bc i use different pronouns including neos and no/it pronouns, or based on the way i talk abt nb characters i like and identify/relate to a lot.

cause i try to be sensitive abt the way i talk abt nonbinary identities and characters cause i obviously dont wanna overstep boundaries but i just think abt them a lot bc i like and relate to them (nb characters/hcs and ocs) a lot and ive just always questioned and got bored/annoyed by the inherent cisnormativity in everything ever (like thinking "why would these aliens have genders and be straight?" as a kid while watching sci-fi or whatnot) like just hating the inherent erasure of trans people made me constantly think abt nonbinariness in characters, and also i just knew and liked a lot of nb characters as a kid and they helped me on my own gender discovery. ...And me saying this is giving me that feeling i talked abt at the start, where i worry ppl are thinking "lol this guy is in denial and is def nb bc he said he relates to nb experiences" cause i honestly dont id as nonbinary! if that changes in the future thats great but how i id now is important too!

and then abt sexuality... ive thought abt it a lot, and have come to the conclusion i dont have much experience in romance or anything so whatever happens or changes in the future will be most important, but for the time being the only woman i have ever contemplated dating was a fictional woman from a video game, and i dont picture myself with a woman irl or feel much when i imagine it, therefore i am satisfied calling myself gay now. but THEN ppl try and go "oh well u could be bi-gay!" ...-___- can we talk abt how invasive that is too? like thats literally saying "oh you could want to date men and women, but only want to fuck men! (or vice-versa)" like maybe that info isnt any of your business?

[banghwa]

Nb ask anon here, tysm for answerring the ask about how u came to terms with ur gender, it's always insightful to see what other trans people have to say about their experiences even if I cant relate to everything u said, I guess for me I started to notice that I wanted to present more masc than i used to, I've 'been' a cis girl all my life and a rather girly one to be honest (although I think part of that is because I've been forced to do so).

But when people call me women or girl smth just.. doesnt sound right to me to be honest, like I know I'm not a man but a woman seems also kinda.... "strong", I just want to put wlw as my gender to be honest ajsjkssks I know that doesnt make sense but it's the only thing I know for sure in my life and also they/them pronouns are cool too I guess lol but anything besides that seems so alien to me, like for example my name, it's not that I dislike it but I've always been reluctant to search for a new one, it's like taking a step in a direction, THAT direction u know what I mean

Ugh then there's the whole presentation problem of like I kinda like to look fem but not for certain people but I definitely wanna look more masc or even gnc, like I want people to look at me and not "be able" to assume what I am u know but also sometimes girly things are pretty so fml

Anyways this gender shit is so complicated jules like it takes so much experimenting and shit and I'm just like ugh why cant I just KNOW things right now

(Sorry for the rant but u just seemed very trustworthy and helpful in the 1st ask)

omg pls dont apologize, im more than happy that your trust me enough to talk to me about something to personal <3 but yess i rly love hearing how everyone defines their gender its so interesting how we're all so different but also the same, its very comforting i feel. (answered under the cut bcs it got long lol)

thats actually really similar to how i started exploring my gender! i am a very feminine person but when i started figuring out my sexuality i also started realizing how much i disliked being read as feminine by other people despite liking being feminine. and how much i liked more masculine compliments and indentifiers. i started out id-ing as a cis bi girl and then a bi nb guy and then bi trans guy and then gay nb and now nb lesbian so its BEEN a process lmao and i know how frustrating it is to feel like you dont have it all figured out or to think you have it figured out only for you to realize it doesnt quite fit anymore later on. it feels a lot like you have to restart the whole process, but in reality i think its more of a checkpoint, ya know? sometimes we have to make a lot of stops and try out a lot of things before we find something that fits and thats totally fine. for me it was like. when i realized i was not cis it felt like running as far away as i would from my agab and then slowly coming back to poke it with a stick kjgfhkj.

and its definetly so complicated when you feel like the terms you want to identify with are "contradictory," we don't really have the vocabulary in english to describe how we experience our gender properly most of the time and some things just dont fit and its hard to explain exactly *why* to someone who doesnt Get It. but maybe its partially a blessing in disguise, bcs it lets us really test things out and play around until it feels right. you can definetly id your gender as wlw, i personally describe my gender as "lesbian" bcs i feel thats the only thing that still ties me to "womanhood." i do get what you mean tho, it was really scary for me too to start using "contradictory" identifiers, like im a lesbian but i use he/they pronouns and i like presenting fem but i hate when people assume im a woman or straight because of it. it really is frustrating trying to figure all this out when everyone around you treats gender like something they get to project onto you and feeling like you need to play into that in order to feel "real." i still have a lot of trouble detatching my gender identity from other peoples assumptions and expectations, so it feels a bit hypocritical to try to give advice on that lol, but i think it all comes back to figuring out what *you* want first and foremost, having trusted people who you can talk to and experiment with, and seeing it as a learning opportunity more than a "goal" or "destination."

it definetly is so frustrating but you're not the only one <3 im sorry happy that you're taking the time to explore what feels right to you even though its daunting to admit that to yourself. some steps like trying a different name can ESPECIALLY be really challenging and scary and it takes so much courage to admit that thats even a potential, im so proud of you honey and i wish you all the best <33 im always here and happy to talk if you want to

[dawsonscreekwasalwaysbad]

season 6 thoughts

hey quick question why the FUCK did you start with that

like on the one hand i’m glad that now i know what happened right after the end of “that’s too much man!”. on the other hand… ow

the mountain bojack climbs is called “metaphor mountain” God bless Lisa Hanawalt

i LOVE the way the episodes are framed… like you get one flashback to bojack drinking and you think that was the first time then it’s like NOPE he was even younger

CINDY CRAWFISH AKSHDJDSF

AND BABY BOJACK SNUGGLING UP TO HIS MOTHER… TRYING TO FEEL AN EMBRACE SHE WOULD NEVER GIVE… CATCH ME CRYING IN THE CLUB

WHO THE FUCK CAME UP WITH THIS NEW INTRO

AND THE WAY IT HAS ALL THOSE FLASHBACK SCENES BUT IT STILL ENDS WITH HIM FALLING INTO THE POOL AND DIANE AND PEANUTBUTTER CHECKING TO SEE IF HES OK AND THEN HES JSUT LOUNGING IN HIS APPLE SHORTS;;; it’s just,, he’s going back home in the end, going back to the place where he started, as if everything will go back to the way it was before and he’ll find himself stuck in the same cycles he tried so hard to escape… all im saying is, i dont think this season is gonna end well

and how it dwells on his past, everything he did wrong, all the most heartwrenching moments, and there aren’t any changes to the intro (as far as i could tell) until episode 8… nothing changes if all you do is look back.

I am LOVING the Mr. Peanutbutter we’re getting this season. I was never really attached to him before; it’s not that I hated him, just that I liked all the other main characters better. and now that they’ve had him do something really bad and reckon with that,, he’s plumbing new depths, exploring those dark places, questioning if he’s truly as happy as he says he is

and bonding with bojack??? who would have guessed

bojack keeps giving advice that is, at best, the kind he doesn’t follow himself, and at worst, bringing others down into the well of self-pity that he’s been stuck in the whole series

Someone give Princess Carolyn a break…

SHE NAMED HER DAUGHTER RUTHIE IM CRYING

Guy seems like a cool guy but I feel like they’re setting him up to seem nice so that it’s more surprising when it’s revealed he’s not. I’m probably being too suspicious, but also we don’t know much of the details about his divorce, do we? Lakeith Stanfield's great tho

EPISODE 4 WAS COMEDY GOLD

The return of Queefburglar69

I WANNA WRAP PICKLES UP IN A BLANKET LIKE A BURRITO AND TELL HER EVERYTHINGS OKAY

Oh man Pickles talking about how her subscribers will always be there for her… like… it’s not one person, it’s a cloud of people, the contents and shape of which changes, might even be completely different and unrecognizable from one year to the next, but they’re all still there as this nebulous support system. and it reminded me of what bojack said to young sarah lynn about how her fans are the only things she can count on

Todd is babey.

Also him wearing the ace colors under his hoodie!!

I knew Diane’s rationale for going to chicago was bullshit. she said it makes her feel good, but “it doesn’t matter where you are, it’s who you are,” and she still dwells on her bad feelings and hates herself just as much in chicago as she did in LA. moving somewhere else isn’t necessarily gonna change those tendencies, she has to work on it herself.

OH MAN AND WHEN BOJACK GETS DR CHAMP DRUNK AGAIN… THROWING THE BOTTLE OUT THE WINDOW WAS A WAY TO AVOID RUINING ANOTHER LIFE AND HE ENDS UP DOING THE EXACT THING HE HOPED HE WOULD NEVER DO AGAIN

was honestly kinda hoping that Dr Champ was just pretending he got drunk to show how bad bojack could get if he relapsed but at the end when he was like “stay…” that’s how i knew that shit was real.

todd is so fucking stupid i love him

ngl am kinda disappointed that todd’s confirmed white, cause i’ve kinda been picturing him as latino for a long time and i know rbw said he doesn’t want to alienate latino viewers who relate to todd. but it makes a  lot of sense, cause he always gets away with stupid shit and gets to the top of things without even having to try just because he knows a guy. and maybe the reason he’s so positive all the time is because it’s so easy for him to be, he never has to worry about shit bc of the privilege his whiteness affords him. also I love that we got to learn more about his backstory

THE CONTRAST BTWN “all the shitty things I did that I can barely even remember because I was high or drunk or it was thirty years ago” and “I remember everything. I’m sober now.” !!!!!!!!!!!!!

sharona sounds like a cross btwn princess carolyn and margo martindale

I have… mixed feelings about the haircut

Oh man Mr. Peanutbutter had a moment… he finally got that crossover episode… I was kinda hoping for a joke that went “Mr. Peanutbutter and BoJack Horseman in the same room? What is this, Philbert?” or “What is this, a short-lived show on a streaming network that got canceled because the star got addicted to painkillers and strangled his costar in a drugged haze?” but this is SO MUCH BETTER. I've never seen him cry before and the way he reacts to himself crying suggests that maybe he’s never cried before at all, and that’s why he just keeps laughing, almost like it’s forced, cause this is supposed to be his happiest moment and it’s not supposed to make him so sad. fucking,, character development

and the cold open of ep 8… you can forgive yourself and move on from your past wrongs but it doesn’t erase the things you did, the effects they have on people, and the trauma they’ve suffered. and then like, how can you forgive yourself if they never forgive you? how do you maintain that balance? why should you move forward if they can’t?

its weird to have an episode consisting entirely of guest stars but it also illustrates the extensive world they’ve built and i applaud that… also where the fuck is ana spanakopita

GINA RETURNS!!! HELL YEAH

her quote about not wanting to be defined by what bojack did to her has always stuck with me, and i feel like now, that quote has sort of come true. like, her saying that made us avoid reducing her to what happened to her, and thats why i wanted to see her come back this season, hopefully moving past it. but she can’t. it traumatized her. and everyone can see the effects of it but she feels like she can’t come forward, cause if she does she’ll be punished. shit like that changes you.

and it’s another instance on the show where someone chooses to advance their career & preserve their reputation over doing the right thing (like what bojack does with herb & sharona), but bojack does it out of self-interest, and gina does it so she doesn’t have to relive her trauma every time she gets interviewed or recognized by a fan. but even when she keeps quiet about it she’s still reliving her trauma

noah fence but what a waste of the once-per-season fuck word. youre really gonna use it in an episode IN WHICH BOJACK DOES NOT EVEN APPEAR, and not only that, but RECYCLE AN OLD SENTENCE FROM A PREVIOUS EPISODE

netflix places no limits on a show’s use of the fuck word (i think), so… fingers crossed for something better in the second part?

OH MY GOD PETE REPEAT INTRODUCED HIMSELF AS PETER ITS ALMOST LIKE HES TRYING TO FORGET THAT TIME & THAT PERSON HE WAS (im probably reading into it too much, I’m sure it’s mostly so we wouldn’t figure out who it was immediately. maybe im just like the kid with the coffee cup.)

and just… ppl describe this show as “family guy or the simpsons except the protagonist faces consequences for his actions” but bojack has gotten away with everything.

you ever just like… you ever watch a scene and feel the cliffhanger vibes creeping up and you just know it’s gonna end there and leave you unsatisfied and begging for more but at the same time that’s what makes it such a good place to end it. that was me with this. (and also the ending of undone)

the thing about this show is, it illustrates what it’s like to be a toxic person. and sure, he has it hard, but the show never asserts that he has it any worse than his victims, even if bojack himself does so. and he only does it so he can feel better about himself. he deserves a reckoning, he needs to pay for his bad deeds. but then, when you know what made him this way and what goes on inside his mind and that he wants to get better, it makes you feel for him, and forces you to ask if he deserves to get better and forgive himself and move forward. but even if he does, it doesn’t change the things he did. it doesn’t fix the lives he’s ruined.

anyway sound off if you think bojack’s gonna die at the end. hopefully not by suicide

[cometcrystal]

coolsville on the cw 8/7c character profiles

fred - probably the one who has the closest riverdale counterpart -- archie. hes not into football but hes the town's golden boy. brad and judy are his parents in this verse, and theyre almost never home, so he's pretty much raised himself. takes everything 100% gravely seriously. has trust issues bc of his parents and pushes the rest of the gang away sometimes. has an arc where he goes to jail bc that was funny w archie. jughead's cousin. was voted leader of the gang by actual vote. extremely protective of everything he loves (mostly the other four).

daphne - throw betty, veronica, and cheryl in a blender and you get cw daphne. she inherited betty's pluck, veronica's girlboss air, and cheryl's family vibe. is the only member of the gang in this show to dress solely in her cartoon version's color scheme, bc she claims purple, green, and pink are her signature colors. takes at least 7 self defense related courses. gets a scene like cheryls where she holds a candelabra and covers herself in fake(?) blood and tells her mother off. has the serial killer gene

velma - pains me to say but shes the jughead of the group. she has the best family situation out of all of them, but her family has moved around the country so much that she gave up on trying to connect with people and instead plays a game where she sees how quickly she can turn people off from wanting to talk to her. therefore she is the new girl here. she gets all the forced literary references and the im a weirdo speech. has an encyclopedic knowledge of cryptids and the paranormal, but believes in none of it. wears stompy lesbian boots only

shaggy - much like sabrina is satan's daughter, one of shaggy's parents is affiliated with either heaven or hell and i cant decide which. he has never met them and doesnt find out about his demigod/demidevil status until the s2 finale. has an avatar state that only surfaces when he's angry, which isn't often because he is either his laid back self or scared out of his mind. despite his cowardice, he becomes fast friends with velma when she arrives because they both wanna uncover the truth behind the disappearance of his sister, maggie.

scooby - i havent decided yet if he can talk or not. perhaps he can speak telepathically with the gang so we dont have a cgi moving dog mouth? also hes descended from aliens just like in sdmi bc thats too good not to use. spirits can speak directly to him since hes a dog, and he hates it. also he has killed a man and it becomes a plot point later

marcie - her family owns the malt shop. idk much about her personality yet but she def crushes on velma the moment she sees her. might be a secret member of the southside serpents-esque gang of coolsville

red - captain of the football team and fred's arch nemesis. also a member of the aforementioned gang. he dies pretty early on but gasp he has faked his death. his death is a red herring for another crime he is involved in

scrappy - prodigy that works for the fbi. idk exactly what hes gonna do yet but i want him here

thats all for now. i want this to be its own thing and not just the events of riverdale with scooby doo characters but im just giving a feel for how everyone is in this universe.

[stressed-crow]

i didnt exactly get tagged, but @lieberts​ said the “whoever wants to do it” thing (like 4 moths ago but i just found it in my likes) so here i goooo

also i tag @krchov​ @cowardlylearningtobebrave​ @feathereddamsel​ @gruntie​ and @luwucifer-s​ but like, only very vaguely. feel free not to~

1. MUSIC TAG MEME 

Rules: Post your first twenty songs in a playlist on shuffle

Mama (My Chemical Romance)

Stigma (BTS)

Man Who Sold The World (Nirvana)

End of Spring (ONEWE)

Love Maze (BTS)

I’m so afraid (Holland)

Dear my friend (agustd)

O-O-H Child (The Five Stairsteps)

Go Go (BTS)

Time is Running out (The Muse)

Movement (Hozier)

Les Passants (Zaz)

The Witching Hour (ODJBOX)

Feelings (Hayley Kiyoko)

0X1=LOVESONG (txt)

YAYAYA (Stray Kids)

Empire (Of Mice and Men)

Problems (Mother Mother)

Question (Stray Kids)

Kill Your Heroes (AWOLNATION)

(i do not take any criticism on my music taste, least of all a costructive one)

2. Rules: MAKE A NEW POST, bold what applies to you and tag whoever you want to get to know better.

APPEARANCE 

I’m an I-need-to-pull-the-driver-seat-all-the-way-in kind of a person // i wear glasses or contacts // i have blonde hair // i prefer loose clothing to tight clothing  // i have one or more piercings // i have at least one tattoo  // i have blue eyes // i have dyed or highlighted my hair // i have gotten plastic surgery // i have or had braces // i sunburn easily // i have freckles // i paint my nails // i wear makeup // i don’t often smile // i am pleased with how I look // I prefer nike to adidas // i wear baseball hats backward

HOBBIES & TALENTS 

i play a sport // i can play an instrument  // i am artistic  // i know more than one language // i have won a trophy in some sort of competition // i can cook or bake without a recipe // i know how to swim // i enjoy writing // i can do origami // i prefer movies to tv shows // i can execute a perfect somersault // i enjoy singing // i could survive in the wild on my own (if it was like... chill wildreness. i mean i can get a fire going and shit like that i cant fistfight a bear or whatever) // i have read a new book series this year // i enjoy spending time with friends // i travel during school or work breaks // i can do a handstand

RELATIONSHIPS 

i am in a relationship // i have a crush // i have a best friend i have known for ten years // my parents are together // i have dated my best friend // i am adopted // my crush has confessed to me // i have a long-distance relationship // i am an only child // i give advice to my friends // i have made an online friend // i met up with someone i have met online

AESTHETIC 

i have heard the ocean in a conch shell // i have watched the sunrise // i enjoy rainy days // i have slept under the stars // i meditate outside // the sound of chirping calms me // i enjoy the smell of the beach // i know what snow tastes like // i listen to music to fall asleep // i enjoy thunderstorms // i enjoy cloud watching // i have attended a bonfire // i pay close attention to colors // i find mystery in the ocean (i dont like it tho the sea scares me) // i enjoy hiking on nature paths // autumn is my favourite season

MISC 

i can fall asleep in a moving vehicle // i am the mom friend // i live by a certain quote // i like the smell of sharpies // i am involved in extracurricular activities // i enjoy mexican food // i can drive a stick-shift  // i believe in true love // i make up scenarios to fall asleep // i sing in the shower // i wish i lived in a video game // i have a canopy above my bed // i am multiracial // i am a redhead // i own at least one dog // i have a cat ---------

3. THIS OR THAT TAG GAME (1)

sage green or baby blue | moon or stars | paperback or hardback | piercings or tattoos (i want a new one... both piercing and tattoo) | drawing or writing | saturn or jupiter | line without a hook or mr. loverman (what does this mean??) | ancient greece or ancient egypt | prague (yo i live here thats wild) or amsterdam | dark academia or light academia | indie aesthetic or cottagecore | stargazing or late night drives | strawberries or watermelons | rings or necklaces | extrovert or introvert | dragons or griffins | ocean or mountain | silver or gold | dawn or dusk | creative or free spirit | early bird or night owl | cook or bake | dagger or sword ---------

4. THIS OR THAT TAG GAME (2)

indoor plants or gardens // cloud-watching or star-gazing // water or fire // paperback or hardcover // running or hiking // sleeping with socks or without socks // fruit or vegetables // hanging plants or succulents // dark wood or light wood // handwritten or typed // instagram or pinterest (i dont do either) // braids or pigtails // books or movies // oceans or meadows // forests or fields // sweet or salty // ice cream or chocolate // hoodies or sweaters // long hair or short hair // piercings or tattoos (new!! both!!) // summer or winter (both suck) // boots or sneakers // cars or motorcycles // curls or straight hair // castles or cottages // sunny days or storms // reptiles or birds // disney or nickelodeon (am european) // strawberries or watermelon (im using this opportunity to pick the other one yes) // essays or posters // phones or laptops // glass or stone // dark or light // photos or paintings // circuses or theaters // reading or writing // dogs or cats // poetry or novels // monsters or ghosts // thrift shops or libraries // fiction or non-fiction

5. Post one picture from my camera roll (no new downloads) to sum up my personality! u get two bcs they are v good

6. 30 QUESTIONS TAG GAME 

RULES: Answer 30 questions and tag others

Name/Nickname: lucy 

Gender: female 

Star Sign: leo

Height: 170 cm 

Time: 22:04 

Birthday: july 1  IS WHAT I WROTE INITIALLY bcs i cant fucking read and thought it just said “date” lol anyway its 11th of August

Favorite Bands: bts, stray kids :)

Favorite Solo Artists: sunmi, taemin :) and hozier i cant betray him 

Song stuck in my head: la la la la vie en rose

Last Movie: def some horror movie but i forget which lol

Last Show: probably the untamed lmaooo did not even finnish it 

When did I create this blog: december 2013 apparently 

What do I post: kpop babey 

Last thing googled: i gotta fact check lots of shit for work so probs smting sports related (but make no mistake i dont know a single thing abt sports) 

Other blogs: what for i dump everything here

Do I get asks: no

Why I chose my url: self-explanatory

Following: 100

Followers: ???

Average hours of sleep: about 8 hours 

Instruments: none 

What am I wearing: pink pajama shorts with kitties, black shirt torn beyond decent wearability and this dark green... jacket,,, hoodie...thing.

Dream job: village witch 

Dream trip: me @ japan: 

(i was supposed to go study there starting winter 2020 :) im abt to lose my fucking mind :) so yeah you get a dead meme for this) also new zealand, iceland, and going back to sweden sometime

Favorite food: pizza bithc its versatile, also cereal coz im a child

Nationality: czech (rip) 

Favorite song: black swan (bts), levanter (skz), take me to church (hozier), noir (sunmi) (those are from the top of my head current favs theres way more but here u go)

Last book read: MIMOZEMŠŤANÉ V ČECHÁCH (= aliens in czechia) by idk, some married couple thats probs wanted whatever xfiles had but low budget, its pure nonsense, best read of this year, dont regret a single second

 Top three fictional universes I’d like to live in: magnus archives bich i dont give a fuck; middle earth to blaze it with hobbits; i wanna be one of those lil shaky-head-tree-things in mononokehime

[inosukeslefttoe]

so i watched the first two episodes of elfen lied today and like,,, i can already tell its much too big brained for me to understand most of it,, but im just gonna put some of my thoughts here !!

lmao rn i just wanna talk about how sick the opening is dude... its so cool how its not one of the classic jammy anime openings thats usually used to get the viewer dancing and even more hooked on the show by including epic fight scenes or mini-spoilers for the upcoming episodes. it sort of caught me off guard bc i cant think of another show ive watched thats done something like this for the opening? but nonetheless, i found myself very entranced by the song and wanting to know what the woman was singing about and how it can relate to the show (i didnt look it up yet bc i dont want any spoilers for anything,, ill probably revisit this when ive finished the show)

also the art !! its so rad !! im kinda into art so i immediately noticed the resemblance of every scene in the opening to the works of Gustav Klimt. especially to his painting “the kiss” !! i havent done any sort of analysis on that painting but from a first glance, i can see this sort of longing and passion to it. the man seems to be intimately holding the woman and she is clinging onto him very tightly suggesting a strong connection and passion between them.. the way she seems to be only held up by him and grasping onto him like hes her life source gives me the feel of yearning for more intimacy and connection so maybe this man is nothing but a mirage or something the woman cant quite reach. it also seems like even though its the man holding up the woman, the woman is the central focus of the piece since she has been given far more detail. this leads me to think that maybe lucy/nyu (i know they share a body but are they built as two separate characters/souls ? or are they very similar?) could be this woman but im not quite sure who the man is yet. it could be that one black haired dude whose name i forgot, or maybe shes clinging to something more like a concept or feeling that she cant quite grasp (it may be innocence, intimacy or acceptance or smthn since that already seems like its a hard thing for her to have since shes some sort of ?? alien?? im not sure yet lmao) 

uhhh i sort of lost my train of thought while writing this ?? but n e ways im super excited to keep watching this show and keep an eye out for more artsy references and all those deeper themes that im definitely already missing hehe... i hope i can write an update after i watch more or finish the show !! and maybe ill actually do research on gustav klimt bc now im in the mood to look at art

12/29/20

[sukirichi]

read the new chapters and aAAACKKKKK BESTIE???

y/n - ‘I was born to make everyone’s life a living hell’ maam this LINE?! JAW DROPPED, TIME STOPPED being insecure all her life and wanting to live up to the expectations to her dad just to have that sliver of attention from him, that sentence gives us a glimpse on how little she felt despite being accomplished, rather successful actually because she always cleans her boss’ mess have a lot of baggage to unpack. and when the secret was confirmed, her anger rejects all of the entity that ties with her past because both her parents deprived her for the things she was supposed to have– becoming greedy to fulfill those. then eventually, somehow, going back to her roots aka being humble after having the talk with her dad. As most of her insecurity started because of him and how she had to be the bigger person for his other family, clearing out the misunderstanding between them brought a sense of peace  while she’s settling in the restless turn of events.

and with our main man gojo, this guy, it is not wise to- 😤😤 how can you say you’re engaged after doing the body tango huh? esp when you said you want y/n to be your wife? oh gee and the revelation of his past relationship with mia and how he sees her in y/n is so fucked up. can’t help but think that satoru wanting to marry and be this lovey-dovey with y/n is just him reliving the moments that mia never gave him in the past. and y/n accepting that their current relationship is based on how they’re filling up the cracks in their needs and settling for the sake of familiarity. imagine how deep in love our girl is to keep satoru in her life 💔 im still in it for the second lead agenda

needless to say, everyone here needs a therapy so they can get their shit straight together 🤧🤧 (ノ•̀ o •́ )ノ ~ ┻━┻

BUT i know you mentioned this many times but laywer! naoya all poised and in his best behavior while helping y/n in her new situation has my heart go💕💕 winning lots of cases and is known in his field, he proved that he is both beauty and brains. and the pen spin??? man be pulling those fast spins either to distract or impress the person he is talking to flashing those perfect white pearls wtf now i can’t get that out of my head naoya brain rot 🥵🥵 also celebrity chef! sukuna in charge of all those delicious, exquisite cuisines? imma make myself broke just to taste his masterpiece🥲 ooh but how about him being a michelin star chef and owning a michelin-starred resto?! no doubt, left and right you see this man appearing on some high food magazine on the cover 😊😊 oh oh i also saw that supermodel! choso?? also his face is plastered on magazines AND luxurious advertisements ex. shibuya crossing! where most people be drenched in his glorious presence yea weird shibuya arc ref pls kill me and everyone talks how handsome and intimidating he is while he just have a rbf and only the closest people in his life get to see him drop that front 😌😌

with that in mind, imagine supermodel! choso being a godfather to the baby of y/n?? he would go soft immediately at the sight of the child and would probably love giving lots of branded clothes it will be good enough for more than a year ☺️🥲😭

oh and there is this one scene in chp7 that reminded me of the recent korean movie i watched i dont wanna say it in case you wanna check it out its called sweet and sour and oh god idk why but watching it, mind keeps on prompting your fics 😬😬 maybe bcos i some of your fic always had med related topics and the main actress role there is a nurse. i remember that you’re on your clinic training so maybe thats why 😳oohh pls don’t forget to take breaks and be safe heart and oh ur a psych major too? oh wow hi ig in relation to one actress in the sweet and sour fic, she was also in a kdrama the heirs- which was popular at the time with it being packed with some solid household actors and actresses. sky castle tho, ig it relates to the theme of reckless more because its mostly how parents from the upper class will mindlessly destroy someone’s life to attain their materialistic desires  🤧🙂

this fic, easily in my top 3 ‘heart belongs to who it dictates’ so many twists, so much drama and ANGST! YES BESTIE GIMME THOSE ANGST 🥲😌

i hope you’re doing well nowadays :’)) we need to find gege the best chiropractor to take care of his back, so good that it’ll make naoya respawn to life 🙂 suki i don’t think i’ll get tired of saying how much i love your work that it feels illegal im reading it for free 💔. i don’t really have much to offer, but im wishing you good health and success in your life :’)) aah i’ve mentioned this already but take care always 💕💖😊🥰

- 🍳

read the new chapters and aAAACKKKKK BESTIE???

y/n - ‘I was born to make everyone’s life a living hell’ maam this LINE?! JAW DROPPED, TIME STOPPED being insecure all her life and wanting to live up to the expectations to her dad just to have that sliver of attention from him, that sentence gives us a glimpse on how little she felt despite being accomplished, rather successful actually because she always cleans her boss’ mess have a lot of baggage to unpack. and when the secret was confirmed, her anger rejects all of the entity that ties with her past because both her parents deprived her for the things she was supposed to have– becoming greedy to fulfill those. then eventually, somehow, going back to her roots aka being humble after having the talk with her dad. As most of her insecurity started because of him and how she had to be the bigger person for his other family, clearing out the misunderstanding between them brought a sense of peace  while she’s settling in the restless turn of events.

and with our main man gojo, this guy, it is not wise to- 😤😤 how can you say you’re engaged after doing the body tango huh? esp when you said you want y/n to be your wife? oh gee and the revelation of his past relationship with mia and how he sees her in y/n is so fucked up. can’t help but think that satoru wanting to marry and be this lovey-dovey with y/n is just him reliving the moments that mia never gave him in the past. and y/n accepting that their current relationship is based on how they’re filling up the cracks in their needs and settling for the sake of familiarity. imagine how deep in love our girl is to keep satoru in her life 💔 im still in it for the second lead agenda

needless to say, everyone here needs a therapy so they can get their shit straight together 🤧🤧 (ノ•̀ o •́ )ノ ~ ┻━┻

BUT i know you mentioned this many times but laywer! naoya all poised and in his best behavior while helping y/n in her new situation has my heart go💕💕 winning lots of cases and is known in his field, he proved that he is both beauty and brains. and the pen spin??? man be pulling those fast spins either to distract or impress the person he is talking to flashing those perfect white pearls wtf now i can’t get that out of my head naoya brain rot 🥵🥵 also celebrity chef! sukuna in charge of all those delicious, exquisite cuisines? imma make myself broke just to taste his masterpiece🥲 ooh but how about him being a michelin star chef and owning a michelin-starred resto?! no doubt, left and right you see this man appearing on some high food magazine on the cover 😊😊 oh oh i also saw that supermodel! choso?? also his face is plastered on magazines AND luxurious advertisements ex. shibuya crossing! where most people be drenched in his glorious presence yea weird shibuya arc ref pls kill me and everyone talks how handsome and intimidating he is while he just have a rbf and only the closest people in his life get to see him drop that front 😌😌

with that in mind, imagine supermodel! choso being a godfather to the baby of y/n?? he would go soft immediately at the sight of the child and would probably love giving lots of branded clothes it will be good enough for more than a year ☺️🥲😭

oh and there is this one scene in chp7 that reminded me of the recent korean movie i watched i dont wanna say it in case you wanna check it out its called sweet and sour and oh god idk why but watching it, mind keeps on prompting your fics 😬😬 maybe bcos i some of your fic always had med related topics and the main actress role there is a nurse. i remember that you’re on your clinic training so maybe thats why 😳oohh pls don’t forget to take breaks and be safe heart and oh ur a psych major too? oh wow hi ig in relation to one actress in the sweet and sour fic, she was also in a kdrama the heirs- which was popular at the time with it being packed with some solid household actors and actresses. sky castle tho, ig it relates to the theme of reckless more because its mostly how parents from the upper class will mindlessly destroy someone’s life to attain their materialistic desires  🤧🙂

this fic, easily in my top 3 ‘heart belongs to who it dictates’ so many twists, so much drama and ANGST! YES BESTIE GIMME THOSE ANGST 🥲😌

i hope you’re doing well nowadays :’)) we need to find gege the best chiropractor to take care of his back, so good that it’ll make naoya respawn to life 🙂 suki i don’t think i’ll get tired of saying how much i love your work that it feels illegal im reading it for free 💔. i don’t really have much to offer, but im wishing you good health and success in your life :’)) aah i’ve mentioned this already but take care always 💕💖😊🥰

- 🍳

y/n becomes a real baddie when she’s pissed off 😫

hmm y/n wasn’t really working hard for her dad’s attention, it was more like she felt so left out and unwanted (she feels unwanted wherever she goes) that she just decided to pack up and support them from afar bcos to her, she’s so alienated in her dad’s family that she felt like she had to work hard to earn a spot in their table. she knows she’s the outsider but she wants to feel like she can be part of them, that she is also a child deserving of love and care, but becos her stepmom focused more on her actual kids and her own dad was too busy with his new family now, it made y/n feel that she had to do something to be worthy of that.

that’s why most of the money she made working in tokyo was still wired to her family; she put her brothers in school and supported them, all because she hoped it would make them accept her more. now, things are different because she finally found her biological family, but even if valeria and co. still don’t want her, y/n is now more focusing on building something that’s truly hers that no one can take away. yes yes, she did become greedy, but more for power than of acceptance. she got to a point she doesn’t care as much vying for her parents’ approval and now thinks her luxury gives her comfort; only because at least she has that much. like she said in the latest chapter, happiness was not what she needed, it was stability and money - all things she lacked before.

and yea she did go back to her roots! all of her issues started with her dad anyway but that part is slowly patching up 🩹💔 oooh actually your theory is right bestie 🧐 gojo found y/n interesting bcos she reminded him of mia, so the more she pushed him away, the more he’s like wait, i’ve been here before, let’s not repeat past mistakes but i can do better now. on the part where gojo talked to mia while she was asleep, notice how he said he’s given a second chance to do better now, all because he couldn’t do them with mia but he could with y/n.

ohhh actually y/n was the one who established that ‘fulfilling mutual need and settling for familiarity instead of being lonely’ type of relationship. gojo avoided her for weeks and he’s pretty settled in keeping his distance, but she was the one who sought him out. deep down, y/n is afraid if she doesn’t at least use him as an anchor to her more humble roots, then she might spiral out of control and end up like valeria, thus using him as a ‘distraction’ but in reality, she needs his comfort to be grounded.

SECOND LEAD AGENDA OMG LETS GOOO 🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️ geto the fine fine option.

NO BESTIE MOMENT U MENTIONED LAWYER NAOYA I JUST KNEW I WAS GONNA SCREAM. okay but lawyer! naoya is so fine, i love his character so much bcos he’s a pure bean. originally, i was gonna make him an antagonist but i found he had more potential as a good, supportive character. HIS PEN SPIN HELPPP WHY COULDN’T HE JUST BEEN OUR BABY DADDY 😫 he pulls them fast spins bcos he’s nervous btw HAHAHAHA y/n can be quite intimidating and lawyer! naoya is sometimes too precious.

celebrity chef! sukuna is MEAN! he was pictured after gordon ramsay so lmao. omgggg sukuna being famous not only for his food but also his handsomeness 😳 he gets so cocky over how no one can get in his level while popping a battle of champagne, listening to ‘careless whisper’ while dancing to his reflection in the mirror 😤

also yoo supermodel! choso is THE hot shit 🥵 he’s so famous his schedule is packed for an entire year and a half and those are just for very selected brands and designers! ugh imagine going to work on the subway when you see supermodel! choso with rbf posing sexily and you swoon because he’s so sexy. plot twist that choso doesn’t know how to drive bcos as a kamo family member, they grew up with drivers taking them to and fro, so when his driver got sick and everyone else was busy, supermodel choso takes the subway himself and hides behind a face mask and cap while still wearing extravagant clothes that makes him stand out more. he does not have ‘subtle’ on his book at all.

and yeah people say he’s intimidating but its more his height and build + rbf! in reality, he’s just as soft and sweet as naoya, but both of them go into protective mode when someone they care about is being crapped on. and boy when they DO get into “what did you just say?” mode, better run away 🏃🏻‍♀️ supermodel! choso is also an heir to the kamo empire though not after the business, but he still has enough power to take you down in a second.

meanwhile, lawyer! naoya didn’t become this successful without being so savage yet composed he makes you question your entire existence before he drags you to court. lawyer! naoya is so scarily convincing that he can make you plead guilty even tho you did nothing wrong 💀

aaaah omg supermodel! choso LOVES babies actually! as the eldest child who looked after his brothers bcos the kamo parents are always away for work, being a father figure is so natural to him. i can picture him being the one who cries harder than gojo if the baby is born bcos he’s so excited, then reads poems to the baby before sighing that childbirth is such a beautiful thing 🥺

omg i know sweet n sour, the actresses are one of my faves tho i haven’t watched it yet! oooh they’re a nurse? i didn’t know that 🧐 i actually finish my short training in a week so i’ll be heading on to heavy majoring in psychology! wait bestie are YOU also a psych major 😳💕 oh and i see i see, sky castle *jots that down for future references* reckless actually has lots of significance in terms of the parents’ roles so i’m excited to see that! and aww thank you so much, can’t believe i made it in someone’s top three 🥺💕

HELP AHSKWKW i’m gonna call the best chiropractor in the world and send them gege’s way, i’ll cry a river if that’s what it takes to bring my boo back to life 😭 and noo baby the support already means a lot to me, i’m just happy to indulge in my hobbies and share it wih you all so thank you very much for everything 🥺 please take care of yourself too n have a nice day!! kith MWAH 💕

[b0x]

😔 some Thoughts on the Trans Experience under the cut that i wanna vent out bc of some posts ive seen around that just kinda didnt sit right with me i guess

every time someone on here is like “trans men cannot experience eldest/only daughter trauma bc they are men and are therefore experiencing transphobic trauma” it’s like... man, gender is way too complex to be so cut & dry about a topic like this. many trans men grew up experiencing the traumas of being a daughter And being a trans man daughter, both pre-transition and post. saying that isn’t saying “trans men are actually women because they experienced this women’s trauma” it’s just recognising that many traumas overlap, regardless of gender. i know it comes from a supportive place, validating us as real men, but that should include validating our unique experiences too. 

i hope this makes sense, but a trans-man-daughter is still 100% a man, still 100% a son, but is very different to and does not have the same experience as a trans-man-son. and a trans-man-daughter doesn’t mean “a trans man raised as a daughter because they didn’t know they were trans at the time”, or “a trans man raised as a daughter by a homophobic parent even after coming out and already knowing they are trans”. no, a trans-man-daughter can still also be a trans man raised as a son with 100% support, because a parent’s trauma can still pass on regardless of the circumstance, because a trans person’s relationship with themselves and their own gender and body and mind is so unique and one-of-a-kind that we were practically designed to overlap the many gendered concepts that so many gatekeep as a sense of empowerment. 

and it sucks making our own posts/experience sometimes, because they never feel like “our own”? because they all come from traumas and bigotry that have already been boxed and labelled and sorted into sections, and to be someone who has bits and pieces from all those different boxes/sections? a trans person can, for example, experience misogyny one year and then transmisogyny the next and that doesnt make the misogyny the prior year “actually transmisogyny”, it was still misogyny that was experienced, even if it’s later relabeled as “transmisogyny”. if anything that just makes it TWO kinds of misogyny experienced instead of just one. it’s terribly confusing. and trust me, for every cis person confused by a trans concept, i can almost guarantee you it’s just as confusing for the trans person themselves. and this isn’t also me saying that ohh trans people have it worse because we experience Double the bigotry and trauma - no absolutely not. i just think it’s important for people to realise that there are people who will experience both misogyny And transmisogyny and that in itself creates its own new kind of bigotry/trauma experienced, if that makes sense?

of course, i don’t speak for every single trans man, but it’s a very specific kind of transphobia a lot of us experience that ties in directly with eldest/only daughter trauma, and why we relate to and connect with posts like that, even when they’re aimed specifically at those who identify primarily as women.

and on top of all that, i see quite a few of the same trans man “supporters” who say “trans men can’t experience daughter’s traumas because they’re men” do complete 180s and say that trans women can’t experience eldest/only daughter trauma bc their transphobia doesn’t correlate with “womanhood” at the source, because trauma that sons/men/male at birth experience is different to the trauma that daughters/women/female at birth experience, which is.. horrifically and bewilderingly transmisogynistic, transphobic, alienating, and just..  Shocking. shocking that these two points can be somehow made in the same breath together without any of them realising what they’re saying.

it’s like.. this weird group of people who are somehow both the opposite of and exactly the same as terfs? theyre more like... tirfs - trans Inclusionary radical feminists - the people who treat trans men like a substitute for the “effeminate cis gay best friend”, the one’s who will validate your masculinity but not entirely consider you a 100% guy, latching onto that “biological fact” of trans men being “female at birth” and therefore considering you more of a “sister” than a “brother”, regardless of them knowing and understanding that you are a man. i guess its kind of very similar to the transphobes who make awful comments that nonbinary people are just closeted lesbians/gays?

anyway, yes, many traumas are gendered due to binaries designated by society and a misogynistic and men-restricting patriarchy (and many other factors that all play parts in this whole big system such as religion and the upper class), but traumas are traumas, and honestly shouldn’t be gendered, because they all overlap regardless, and can be experienced by anyone if the exact circumstances are met. that and every single trans experience is so unique and so so complex because gender in itself is an extremely unique and complex concept that it just cannot in any way be monitored or labelled into strict rules and laws and binaries.

every time i see a post on here about womanhood and daughter traumas and cis women’s misogynistic experiences and hell even a lot of lesbian traumas/experiences, i find myself completely and entirely relating to many of them every single time even though i am 100% a trans guy, and half grew up as a son. and i guess it’s just kind of weird but not so weird because sure while some days it just feels like im not calling myself a true trans guy, most days its just me validating and relating to an experience that i had that was unique to me and doesnt necessarily mean that im a woman because of it

because womanhood and manhood are temperaments, traits we are either born with or without, traits that are ever-changing and developing as we evolve generation by generation. anyone can pick up or be born with parts of womanhood and/or manhood. like that’s what makes all of us so unique, not a single one of us are alike in any way shape or form because of that. the combinations are always unlimited. so it’s just dumb seeing stuff like that gatekeeped. you cant Own an Experience like thats... what the hell is going on. every time its always the same thing, everyone’s always tryna play god in some way, be it mastering themselves, their own emotions and life, or controlling others, dictating what they think how certain things should be etc

it’s like that one post that’s like everything would be so much simpler if everyone was bi and nothing was gendered ghadjgdkgj

idk.. just.. to gender conceptual things like gender and traits and personalities and traumas is just so... unhelpful and unopen to change and not fluid whatsoever as theyre supposed to be. i dont wanna be all “nothing is real” abt it all but labels and binaries and decided systems and set laws are literally the reason, since the beginning of time, for wars and bigotry and oppression and poverty and the whole shebang. bc Someone decided one day that being a woman means this this and that, and being trans means that and this and that, and those meanings will be the basis we will rewrite occasionally and maybe add to, instead of completely scrapping our whole outdated initial ideas about it bla bla bla. 

im just tired gender is weird and stupid why are we arguing why are we so protective like just have a convo man rule with curiosity not adamancy and you’ll be sooo much happier trust me

[gayspock]

hey! why didn’t you like amnesty? no ill will or anything, was just wondering x

dgDSDIOGDSG LISTEN I... i wanna write sth longer out but YEEK im so tired rn so i guess. boils down to several points??? and this is still long a bit so im putting it... under the cut

1. i dont like how they used the game system. (phrasing it like that, bc im not gonna bash on motw, bc i dont know enough about it and i wanna give it a chance). its very hard to describe this well? but yeah. a lot of amnesty, to me, felt like them just going from event to event, inorganically, rather than them actually playing through a game. like one of the benefits to DND, is that rolls are usually... smaller actions? which lends itself to letting more stuff happen in between. instead in amnesty... it felt like they were just describing big, sweeping mpoments and whilst that was in part due to lack of time it also just. h. i think it stripped it so much of stuff that happens in between. actual interaction. that... always lacked between the main amnesty PCs, so tremendously to me, and it felt So Damn Sad. they rlly didnt ever get to just outright vibe off of each other.  

2.  i really didn’t like the structure. in the beginning. it was formulaic: with the whole hunt abomination, neutralise abomination. whilst a repetitive structure is someething that worked for balance, balance also had the benefit of new and different settings/vibes each arc, as well as spending more time going through things in general (related to my next point). meanwhile, given how amnesty was within a contained setting throughout the whole campaign, i think it would have benefitted far more from something more freeform?  and whilst they broke out of it, in the end, it felt like too little too late especially bc... i personally think the ending needed More to it. more time on the big old twist of these alien bros pitting planets against one another. but even then. i frankly do not think it would matter too much bc.  

3.  and just. god. fact they just tried to cram too fuckn much into this campaign. from the overarching plot to the number of god damn npcs crammed in.  ,

ESPECIALLY the latter. its why im so... worried for graduation, after trav has claimed that he’s already got 50 lined up. whilst im certain theyre mostly going to be minor, its just....... in amnesty, i felt like we were constantly being introduced to new characters each arc, only to ditch them within an episodes time. 

bc like, obviously many NPCs are extras and its fine for some to fade out!! BUT, in the end of amnesty, i felt like so many of them were robbed of development, or the development that they had was lacking. which was IMMENSELY frustrating, as so many of them has such COOL and interesting concepts that ... were literally barely touched. and instead just left there, only for another cool NPC to show up next week. frankly, i couldnt even remember or tell you much about like.... 80% of the npc cast. i was listening to the wrap-up ttazz today, and they mentioned janelle being the pc they talked to the most. i literally barely remember who she was. i certainkly.... do not give a shit about her. dont mean to be crass, but i really dont. there was a handful i did give a damn about, but like... for the most part? even those that i do care about i realise idc about them in canon at alll!! just the more idealised versions of their characters that ive got in my head.  and the npcs, frankly, are what make the campaigns feel most alive to me so i... UHH....

and as i already touched upon with the overarching campaign. god a lot of this shit goes rlly hand in hand. i feel like so much of this was just rushed and pushing it onto the next thing over and over again without ever letting things just. sit and develop a little more or letting us really . reflect on what the fuck was going on. im just,aspfojspdghdsg. YEAH. SAD. MAN. A BIT SAD. bc i did like amnesty in places but........... yeah. if it wasnt taz, i doubt i would have made it to the finale. if this was just another actual play i’d found, iw oulda dropped it LONG ago