#and none of it really matters and our relationship is just our business but ugh

[damndude69]

.

[kokomyass]

Neuvillette ☆ To be a Father

Neuvillette x Fem!Reader Genre: ☁️ Word Count: 1943 Trigger Warnings ⚠️ : none!!

synopsis: in which, our cutesy hydro dragon is afraid he doesn't have what it takes to be a father...

a/n: hey guys yet again, half asleep when posting this....too tired to edit...really hope you enjoy this lowkey gave me baby fever 🔮🌙🔮

Neuvillette always thought of himself as an outcast to human society.

He would observe human customs and analyse them for decades trying to understand humans and their thoughts.

However, there was one concept he had never seemed to grasp despite his hundred years on Teyvat....and that was the concept of love.

Whether it was romantic love, platonic love or familial love, he always pondered what it would be like to fall in love?

Would it be a noticiable thing? Or would it be something that is destined from birth.

No matter how much he would tell himself he didn't need any sort of love, he always felt an ache in his heart seeing couples and their children interact.

However, that aching feeling in his heart soon turned to a warm one when he met you.

The feelings he felt around you exceeded any sort of feelings he thought he would feel after witnessing and analysing others relationships.

You were perfect in his eyes. You were beautiful and you were kind. You always knew how to reassure him when he became insecure about how he struggled to feel like he was included in society.

You knew Neuvillette was a genuinely caring individual no matter how humble he may try to be. He was always very busy but he always made sure to spend time with you even if it is while he is working.

That's why you knew he would be an amazing father.

"Hey, Neuvi, sweetheart!! I have some news...." you walked into his office as he looked up from the papers he was writing in with a warm smile reserved for you.

"What news do you have for me, my dear?" you were now stood in front of his desk. You placed your positive pregnancy test on his desk as he looked at it taking a moment to register what it was.

"I'm pregnant!"

The look of complete and utter shock on Neuvillette's face was something that would never make an appearance again...but you also couldn't ignore his trembling when he hugged you.

Neuvillette was happy to hear you were pregnant of course, it was something he yearned for many, many years, but he didn't know if he had what it took to bring up a child of his own....he wasn't even human.

After you gave birth you noticed that it began to rain quite a bit which made you chuckle slightly knowing that your husband was just a bit emotional about the birth of his own child.

Which brought you to where you both were now. It had been a week since your beautiful daughter was born and you had noticed Neuvillette had become very faraway. You often found yourself asking him things multiple times before he could actually answer, and he seemed to be acting rather clumsy (and for the record neuvillette is NEVER clumsy...) and it wasn't that he wasn't interacting with his daughter but when he would he would looked AWFULLY stiff...

"Ugh....I don't know what to do you guys!!" you rocked your sleeping daughter back and forth sighing.

You had invited your friends Chlorinde, Navia and Furina to your home to help you with Neuvillette's odd behaviour.

"Well, Y/N, have you spoken to him?" Navia suggested.

"Yes, Navia, of course I have! I asked him what the issue is and I even asked if it was about him thinking he wasn't a good father! But the same answer is always given....'I'm fine dear, don't worry about me just a bit tired is all'  and then he calls it a day!!" You were getting stressed as you began to rock your baby a bit faster.

"Y/N, maybe we should...uh...calme-toi...you might wake up your daughter..." Furina patted your arm, sweatdropping slightly. You sighed as you slowed your movements.

"Your right...I just wish he would talk more you know, he doesn't have to take everything on alone now..." you looked down at your baby sleeping calmly.

"Well, Y/N, knowing how much he loves you I'm sure he will open up sooner or later...and I believe he will have to for the sake of your future with you daughter." Chloride stated, making you feel slightly better.

"Yes! Maybe you can ask Sigewinne, maybe Neuvillette may seek advice from her especially if he doesn't want you to know!" Navia butted in as she poored some tea for everyone.

"You guys are right!! Thank you guys you always know how to help!" a wave of tiredness washed over you as your felt your daughter begin to stir awake.

"As much as I would love to carry on talking my baby needs to eat and I think the postpartum symptoms are hitting me...."

You said goodbye to everyone and sat in bed feeding your daughter before placing her in her bed to sleep. Your eyes felt heavy and lidded and as much as you wanted to stay awake for Neuvillette, your body betrayed you.

You felt a soft kiss on your head as you stirred awake looking up to see your husband's soft and beautiful eyes glowing at you.

"My deepest apologies to you my dear, work was extremely busy..." you chuckled softly as you hugged him tightly, interrupting his sentence.

"Don't worry my love, as long as your okay that's all that matters. We missed you." he smiles as he turns to the small bed your cute daughter is sleeping in.

"I missed you both an immense amount" He strokes her cheek softly but the flash of sadness that was on his face for a millisecond didn't go unnoticed by you.

"Neuvi, what is wrong, please tell me." you grabbed his hand and forced him to look at you. He looked a bit shocked for a moment before hiding it under a very faint smile.

"Y/N, don't worry, you need to stay healthy and happy, especially for our daughter." he strokes your hair as you frown at his answer.

He went to sleep next to you as it was nothing but you were going to find out what was going on.

Time Skip

You had secretly made it to the Fortress of Meropide to visit some good friends.

"Are you ready for this D/N?" you look down at your daughter in her little pram as she giggles excitedly clapping her hands together.

"That's my girl! Let's go!" you kissed your daughters nose before pushing her towards the infirmary.

You made it to the infirmary and you were lucky enough to see both Sigewinne and Wriothesley there having a conversation. Sigewinne was the first to notice you.

"Y/N!!!! It's so nice to see you! And you too little Y/N!!" Sigewinne ran up to you as you gave her a hug and she pat your daughters head making her giggle.

"It's nice to see you too Sigewinne! And hello Wriothesley."

"Hey there, Y/N..." Wriothesley walked up to you smiling. "Does ya kid still hate me?"

You laughed, "Let's see" you pointed to your daughter as Wriothesley put his finger out to her and she grabbed it giggling.

"Would you look at that!! Finally warming up to your uncle!!"

That's what Wriothesley thought before your daughter began biting his finger very hard.

"OWW! Why you-" he squinted at your child as you laughed.

Time went on and you explained the situation to them.

"I must say Neuvillette randomly came down here to talk to me...he never does that unless he wants to get his mind off something." Wriothesley folded his arms pondering.

"Yep! And Monsieur Neuvillette asked me if it is possible to bring up a child even if you aren't human...now it makes sense why he asked that. Of course I said yes!!" Sigewinne and Wriothesley had confirmed your suspiciouns.

"Oh, Neuvi, he may have the most authority in the whole of Fontaine, but he doesn't know how to listen to me..." you sighed shaking your head.

"Who would've thought a little girl would make him act like this? This is the first time I have veer seen him like this..." Wriothesley chuckles.

"Me too....I've been hear for as long as I can remember and he's never been this distressed...." Sigewinne but in placing a finger on her chin.

"Well, I suppose I should go and talk to him then...thank you so much for your help guys idk what I would do without you." you bid farewell to you Fortress companions before making your way to the Palais Mermonia.

Time Skip

You made it to the Palais Mermonia and rushed through all the doors until you made it to Neuvillette's office pushing the double doors open walking in with your pram.

"Neuvillette, we need to talk."

Neuvillette looked up from his work, shocked to see you there. He stood up and walked towards you.

"Y/N, what's going on? What wrong why do we need to-"

"Do you think you aren't going to be a good enough father to our daughter?" you folded your arms staring at him in the eyes.

Neuvillette stared at you wide-eyed, he stayed silent and looked at the floor avoiding your eyes.

You cupped his face in your hands and turned his head to lock eyes with you. You placed you lips on his softly as he melted into the sweet and soft kiss that had heavy emotion subdued in it.

"Neuvi...why would you ever think that? When I told you I was pregnant, I had no doubts or fears....not one...because I knew that no matter what you would craft our daughter into an amazing one with your amazing qualities. I know it sound cheezy....but Neuvi, I couldn't choose any other man to be the father of my daughter, so please, don't feel like you aren't enough your daughter loves you, and I love you and as long as you try that's all we care about."

You spilled your heart out as you stared at each other.

"I-" Neuvillette began speaking but suddenly it began to slowly rain outside.

You chucked, pressing a kiss on his nose.

"No need to feel sad my love." Neuvillette chuckled at your joke.

He looked at your daughter (who was really excited to see her dad) and picked her up rocking her back and forth.

"Y/N, I'm sorry. Sorry I didn't tell you. I felt like being a dragon, i have no human exlerience and i would lead out child down the wrong path. I should've told you so we could work it out but I just felt so unsure I found myself going to Wriothesley and Sigewinne for comfort. But none of that comfort I'd as good as the comfort of my family I must admit."

You chuckled hugging him tightly being careful now to wake the now asleep baby.

"Does this mean you will do nappy changes?"

"Of course, dear, I must relieve you of that stress!"

"This is why I love you~" You placed a kiss on his lips as he smiled warmly, a smile reserved for you AND his daughter.

"I love you both, my happiness."

A lil bonus:

It was nighttime and the baby had woken up crying and Neuvillette had gone to take care of it.

However, you being a curious little cat, you spied on them.

Neuvillette held her on his chest patting her back, humming a sweet melody to her.

"...Papa..." you daughter said her first word.

You could tell Neuvillette didn't seem to understand the significance of this based on how he carried on with whatever he was doing.

Meanwhile  you were crying...

Luckily, you were recording....it would be a reminder to explain to him later.

a/n: SOMEONE TELL ME THAT THIS DOESNT MAKE SENSE BECAUSE I WAS A MESS WRITING THIS SHIT um love you guys hopw you enjoy anon that requested too 💜💜🍇🍇

[witcher-and-his-bard]

Love Letters

Pairing: Geralt x Jaskier Warning(s): none Rating: general

Fic Summary: Jaskier writes down all his feelings in a letter he never expects Geralt to see - only for Geralt to arrive shortly after, snowed out of Kaer Morhen.

For @jackironsides 💜

My beloved Geralt

Dear Geralt

Geralt, my love

No matter what he writes, it sounds wrong. Too intimate, too casual, too... much in one way or another. Jaskier hasn't even gotten past the introduction and he already wants to give up on the letter. It feels so easy over the summer, when he and Geralt spend long, muggy days walking side-by-side. Jaskier sings and Geralt rides, and occasionally, Geralt will even sing along with whatever he's playing.

Now, in the dark of his room at the academy, those feelings feel dull and distant. Not Jaskier's feelings, of course, but the potential reciprocation. These days, he finds himself thinking about Geralt's relationships with Eskel or Lambert, or even Vesemir. He wonders how different those relationships are to the one he shares with Geralt. Maybe those gentle things Geralt says to him in the comfort of their shared inn rooms are just things Geralt would say to anyone.

Ugh. Jaskier flops backward in his chair, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands. He wishes there was an easy way to know these things, and for the first time in a long time he finds himself envying Yennefer. She could just read Geralt's mind, she could just know. And Geralt? He can smell emotions or something like that; at least, he always seems to know when Jaskier is upset about something. Maybe he took the wrong path in life. Maybe he should have tried to get into Ban Ard and become a mage. Surely there is some chaos in him, enough, at least, to be able to read minds.

Briefly, Jaskier considers contacting Yen. They've had a better relationship as of late, and she might be able to give him some insight, if nothing else. But he doesn't want to drag her into something that isn't really any of her business. Not because he's afraid to tell her, but because she might not want to know. She's happy now - travelling with Triss and Istredd last he heard - but there might be some leftover feelings there and he doesn't want to bring up Geralt in a romantic setting if he doesn't need to. Plus, he doesn't want to feel like more of a burden than he already does.

Jaskier looks down at the half-started letter in front of him and angrily crumples it up before blowing out the candle and shoving his chair back. He flops forward onto folded arms, looking out into the blue of the night sky, speckled with snow. Normally, he would take comfort in a view like this, but tonight, it just reminds him of how far away Geralt is.

Is it even worth beginning a relationship when they spend so much time apart? Would Geralt even be interested? Even if he was madly in love with Jaskier, would that be enough? What's the point when you have no one to cuddle with and watch the snowfall? But then maybe Geralt would want to visit some winters if they were more.

Gods, he wants that more than he can even properly comprehend. The idea of falling asleep in Geralt's arms feels like the height of romance. Already, Jaskier treasures the moments he falls asleep listening to Geralt's voice, even if he does feel a bit bad about it in the morning. Despite himself, a dopey smile spreads across his face at the thought. He misses Geralt more than he can say while they're apart in the winter. It's only a little into the season and already the long, dark winter feels endless.

Jaskier inhales deeply, sighs, and sits up to write. He's determined to finish this letter, even if it never reaches its intended audience.

Geralt,

I know it's barely been a month since we parted, but I find myself longing again for your company. Teaching is hectic as always, and my students love a tale of your heroism. I know you don't consider yourself a hero, but I do. Though lately, I find myself recalling different moments from our travels. I find myself thinking of the evenings after a contract has been completed and paid. I think back to the ale or tea and the stars hanging low in the sky. The way the firelight flickers on your face. I miss that. I miss the way your hair falls in your face when you take it down to sleep. I miss how stubborn you are about that awful headband. And I regret to tell you now that I've grown... rather fond of it, actually.

Rather rarely do I find myself at a loss for words, but they escape me when I try to nail down all the things I feel for you. I know I am a mere mortal, doomed to die years or even decades before you, but given the chance, I would happily live out the rest of my life at your side. Perhaps even in your arms.

I know love is not a word you use often, but the way I feel it could very well become something so all-encompassing. I can't promise that love is how I feel now. I find myself mixed up in a way I've never felt before. That's not to say that I don't love you, because I do. As a friend, as a companion, as something more. Perhaps one day, even as a lover. Even if you don't feel the same, I want you to know that you are deeply cared for in every way one person can care for another. I don't mind if you don't want to see me again, so long as it is your wish, and one borne out of intention rather than fear. Because although I've never spoken the words, I've longed for you for days and weeks and months and years, silently staying by your side. Perhaps one day you will have me there on purpose - despite, or maybe even because of, my feelings for you.

Until then, I remain yours, as always.

Jaskier.

Jaskier looks over the letter once more and, feeling an uncomfortable swell of emotion, folds it neatly and tucks it into an envelope that just reads Geralt. He's only just finished hiding the evidence when there's a knock at his door.

"Yes?" he asks.

"Sorry to interrupt so late," the voice on the other side of the door says. Jassa, Jaskier thinks, his assistant at the university. "You have a guest."

"A guest?" Jaskier asks, perplexed. Who on earth would brave this weather just to visit? The only guests he normally has are students or his fellow professors, either of whom would just come to his room and knock themselves.

"He says he's a friend. Geralt? I think," Jassa says.

Jaskier's heart somersaults.

"Right," he says, "of course. Send him up. I'll leave the door open."

"Certainly," Jassa smiles. "I'll send him right up. Have a good night, Professor."

"And you," Jaskier finishes, barely aware of what he's saying.

What is Geralt doing here? Of all the years they've known each other, he's never once come to visit over the winter, so why now? Jaskier turns around, leaning on the door, and is struck by the state of his room. For the last two days, he's done nothing but lie around and sulk, and it shows. He absolutely cannot let Geralt see his room like this.

Given he has roughly four minutes, maybe a few more if Geralt stops to talk to Jassa before coming up, it's not going to be easy. So Jaskier starts with the worst of it: the clothes and things laying all over the bed and floor. There is a surprising amount of mess considering Jaskier is the only one residing in the room, but he manages to get the worst of it tidied before the knock at the door. A final glance tells him only the desk and table are still cluttered, but that much is acceptable so he crosses to the door.

As he pulls it open, Jaskier is struck by Geralt's smile. He always is when they haven't seen each other for some time, but this feels more. Maybe it's because he's been considering his own feelings lately, but looking at Geralt, here and in person, makes his legs weak.

"Hi," he says shakily.

Geralt gives him an odd look, but it quickly turns into a half-smile and he steps into the room when Jaskier moves aside.

"I hope I'm not intruding," he says gently, "it's no trouble to find a room at the inn if-"

"Not at all," Jaskier interrupts. "I'd be happy to host you if you're staying.”

"I had hoped to," Geralt says.

"What brings you?" Jaskier asks.

"The route to Kaer Morhen was snowed over by the time we arrived in Kaedwen," he explains, "I thought this might be the best place to stay."

Part of Jaskier is delighted at the thought, though when he considers it further, Oxenfurt is further than any of the other places Geralt would be more than welcome to stay over the winter. There's no good reason for him to have travelled all the way to the coast, when surely Yen would have taken him in without question. Their relationship may not be romantic anymore, but Jaskier knows there is still a deep love between them. And he's happy for it, which makes it all the more confusing why Geralt is here. He thinks to ask, but reconsiders.

"Please," he says, remembering his manners, "make yourself at home. I can have a bath poured if you're tired? Was Roach properly cared for? Shall I call for supper-"

"Jaskier," Geralt says gently, "Roach is fine. A small meal would be nice, but there's no rush. Right now I'd just like to relax."

Of course, Jaskier thinks. He must have been travelling for weeks if he first attempted the path and then had to turn back. Jaskier had left him just north of the Pontar, between the mountain ranges, so that must have been-

"Jaskier?" Geralt asks, cutting off his train of thought. "Is everything alright?"

"Fine," Jaskier assures him. "Just wasn't expecting company and I'm not prepared for it- Not that you're not welcome!" he corrects quickly, and with a little too much vigour.

"Perhaps you're the one who needs a rest," Geralt says, half-teasingly.

"Just to get my head on straight," Jaskier assures him. "Why don't you make yourself comfortable and I'll go fetch something warm for you to eat."

Jaskier slips from the room, only stopping one he's far enough away that Geralt won't hear him. He stops and sighs, pressing a hand to his chest as if to stop the mad beating of his heart. Surely Geralt has heard it already and he’s given himself away, but he was hardly expecting to be visited like this out of the blue.

He takes another few calming breaths before continuing on down to the kitchen. He's close with the chef - with most of the staff if he's honest - and has more than once helped him out of a sticky situation with less-than-edible herbs, so his request for a private supper is granted with a smile. In the meantime, Jaskier makes his way back up to the room, holding his breath for a moment before opening the door.

Geralt is standing over the desk in the small room, mumbling quietly. As Jaskier approaches, slipping up behind him, he realizes Geralt is reading the poetry he'd been working on. Jaskier has never been so relieved to know how little Geralt thinks about his poems, as these ones are nearly explicitly about him, the only relief being that his name is not used. Wolf, he uses once or twice, but it's a metaphor and Geralt always says he doesn't care for flowery things like metaphors.

"This is... lovely," Geralt says, though he sounds a bit off as he does.

"Thank you," Jaskier says quietly, slipping around to Geralt's side to see which one he's reading.

"You- your narrator sounds sad."

"Ah, yes. Been a bit of a downer lately, I suppose."

Jaskier tries to laugh it off but Geralt turns to look at him, something like concern in his expression.

"What's wrong?"

"Oh nothing's wrong," Jaskier assures. "I've just not been feeling myself."

"Can I help?"

Jaskier is taken aback by the blunt suggestion and his head jerks up to meet Geralt's eyes.

"I'm not sure you could, love," he says gently.

"If someone has hurt you-"

"No," Jaskier says quickly.

"You reek of heartache," Geralt says bluntly.

"Right. Well." He considers for a moment before deciding against lying to Geralt. "Unrequited love, I'm afraid."

"How do you know it is?"

"Unrequited?" Jaskier laughs, "oh, my darling, he'd have to be the stupidest man alive not to know. Or perhaps the most oblivious. I'm sure he would have said something if he felt the same."

"You haven't," Geralt counters.

"Right, well- He wouldn't want someone like me, surely."

"Perhaps he feels you think the same of him."

Jaskier had considered that option, but it seems unlikely.

"Either way, it's best just to tell him. I'm sure he'll be flattered if nothing else."

The mere suggestion of it makes Jaskiers stomach turn and he nods slowly. Thankfully, at that moment, supper is delivered to their room and he is spared the thought of confessing his feelings - out loud - to Geralt.

His relief is short-lived as supper is finished shortly, but he makes an excuse about taking the dishes away and dashes out the door with them. Jaskier wants to cry. He can't believe he's gotten himself into a mess like this and he can only hope Geralt doesn't continue to bring it up.

He's so distracted thinking about it that it seems like seconds before he's standing back in front of his door. He hesitates before opening the door, keeping his eyes closed until the last possible moment.

When he opens his eyes, Jaskier's heart jumps into his throat. As Geralt turned to see him, a piece of paper had fallen from his hands and Jaskier can't take his eyes off it. He'd been so preoccupied worrying about the mess when Geralt showed up that he'd forgotten to hide the letter. And it was addressed to Geralt, he had every right to read it, but-

"Jaskier?"

Jaskier scrambles across the floor, reaching for the letter, but Geralt catches his wrist, holding him still.

"Is this just another one of your poems?" he asks quietly.

Jaskier shakes his head. There's no use denying it.

"It's… me. I'm the one you were talking about earlier."

Jaskier half wishes he could fall through the floor and never have to finish this conversation. Sadly, despite how hard he wishes, the floor refuses to open up beneath him. He nods.

"I want to hear you say it."

Jaskier's tongue feels heavy in his mouth but he manages, "I don't know what to say. I don't want to make any big confessions I can't live up to."

"Then how about this?" Geralt says.

He leans in, taking Jaskier's face in his hand, and softly presses their lips together. For a moment, Jaskier forgets to breathe and has trouble believing this is real at all. But when Geralt pulls back again, he's smiling, his cheeks a faint shade of pink. Jaskier's first thought is that it's quite a pretty colour on him before he presses forward and kisses him again.

"Yeah," he breathes, barely pulling away to speak, "I think that's a good start."

[elliegoose]

haven't ever posted about this before because it felt like none of y'all's business but god, i hate how emotional i still am over the breakup i went through last summer.

i initiated the damn thing, so you'd think i'd have greater confidence in that choice and believe that i did the right thing. however, months later i still miss the good parts of that relationship so badly that it's hard not to regret my decision some days. like sometimes it almost doesn't matter how unhealthy the relationship was, or how our dynamic drove me to have a nervous breakdown, and when things boiled over and reached a breaking point the resulting contlicts set off enough alarm bells and red flags in my head that i didn't know what to do other than leave. some days i wish i could just rewind time to like april of last year and have everything feel okay again.

you'd think that i would've worked through these feelings by now because i've had weekly therapy ever since the breakup happened and have used a huge portion of that time to talk through every single aspect of this fucking relationship and its dissolution, but apparently i'm still getting really emotional about it all from time to time.

i think i'm also just lonely and scared to try dating again after how badly that went. ugh.

[notsocheezy]

Brain Curd #105

Brain Curds are lightly edited flash fiction - practically first drafts - posted daily (haven't missed one yet!) and sometimes written with the express intention of being terrible… but, you know, in an endearing way. Please like and reblog if you enjoy - the notes keep me going!

He's gonna be Frank with you. Read the rest of The Frank Program here on Tumblr!

“The Frank Program is sponsored by HelpYourself. HelpYourself is founded on the belief that everyone deserves therapy, and that it should be affordable for all. No need for insurance - just download the app and your first psycho… psycho… what does that say?” Frank showed the script to Big Mike.

“It says, ‘psychoanalysis.’ Can you even read, man?”

“Yeah, o’course I can read! There’s two vowels in a row, it’s confusin’! Now stop interrupting.” Frank cleared his throat. “All ya gotta do is, download the app and your first psycho-analysis is free with promo code FRANKPRO2024. Share your experience with therapy.”

“Uh…” Mike leaned over. “Pretty sure that part is instructions for you. You aren’t supposed to read it.”

“I know that! I said that because I wanted to ‘boost engagement.’”

“Sure you did.”

“Hmm…” Frank tapped his fingers on the table. “My experience with therapy… do ya think physical therapy counts?”

“No.”

“Well I never got none of that, neither, so I guess it don’t matter. My ex-wife always used to tell me I needed therapy for my anger issues…”

“She was right, you jackass.”

“Shut the hell, up, Mike!” Frank groaned. “How about I just make something up, huh? Like I tell a story about how therapy saved my life or some crap?”

“What, like you got locked in a looney bin?”

“Not a fucking looney bin! For fuck’s sake, Mike.”

“Hey, hey, no shame in it. Half the girls I’ve dated have been to one of those places. They’re packed with babes.”

“I’m not gonna tell everyone I’m nuts just to make the sponsor happy. You wanna do it, go right ahead.”

“I actually have been to therapy, Frank.”

“No shit? What for?”

“Like many folks our age, I grew up not treating my mental health with the concern it deserved. My dad and I didn’t talk about feelings, and my mom was too busy with my older sister and my younger brother. I was the loud one, but I was never heard.”

“That’s deep, man.”

“I’ve been a professional radio host for the last decade. I know what I’m doing. Anyway…” Mike paused to make it easier to cut down. “So when I moved out at eighteen, I was a complete disaster. I couldn’t hold down a job. Roommates always got sick of me. My relationships never lasted.”

“Probably ‘cause you kept dating psychos, Mikey.”

Big Mike ignored that comment and continued. “When I finally got a therapist and opened up to her, it was like I was clearing out the garbage from the back seat of my pickup truck. And you find the craziest junk buried in there, like fast food toys from when you were seven.”

“Really?”

“It’s a metaphor, Frankie. You gotta clear out the garbage in the back of your head so you can fit more people into your life.” Mike took the paper from Frank’s hand. “And that’s why we suggest HelpYourself, the easy way to get the help you need. Download the app today, and don’t forget that promo code FRANKPRO2024 for your free consultation and first psychoanalysis. That’s HelpYourself on the app store. And now back to The Frank Program.” Mike stopped the recording. “See, that’s how you do it.”

“I appreciate the help an’ all, but shouldn’t I say the last part?”

“What, ‘cause your name is in it?”

“Well… yeah.”

Mike waved his hand. “We’ll get it on the next one and cut it together.”

“How many we got left?”

“Seven. Today, anyway.”

“Ugh.” Frank rubbed his face and took the next paper from the table as Mike started up a new recording. “The Frank Program is sponsored by GrapeCrate, the first word in weekly fruit boxes sent right to your door…”

[its-deputy-caleb]

Hey! I just love how you write and characterize the lords and if you're taking requests i was wondering if i could do one of my own. It's be basically how the other lords would react to finding out you were datibg one of them.

Hii, thank you for requesting this! it’s been a very busy and stressful day and this really helped me unwind! It’s gender neutral and i put it all in a little scenario for everyone to enjoy!

Alcina Dimitrescu

You knew that when you invited the other three lords over to Castle Dimitrescu for dinner that there may be some shocked faces sitting around you.

It was finally the night that you and Alcina were going to announce that you were dating to her other siblings. Her daughters of course had already welcomed you into their home and looked up to you.

Alcina sat at the head of the table, you to her side as she placed her hand in yours and raised a glass in the air, Daniela tapping her knife against her glass in order to clear the room.

“My dearest, and not so dearest siblings, tonight we dine with a special occasion in mind… and so I would like to formally announce to you all that we’re dating.”

She finishes her toast by saluting Heisenberg who looks like he’s just about choked on his fork when he sees Alcina hold your hand up and kiss your knuckles.

Angie screeches with excitement which breaks the silence of the room, jumping for joy as Donna claps her hands, the two clearly very happy for you both.

Moreau is nothing but supportive, if not a little sad as couples make him fell that much lonelier but he can’t stop the smile on his face from seeing you two together.

Karl pretends like he’s not happy for his sister, keeping up the playful banter the two share and whines about not wanting to attend any weddings or think about gifts.

“Oh hush, you man-thing. You’re just jealous, nothing more.”

Everyone in the room chuckles and Karl holds up his glass to salute the two of you in return, very happy for the both of you but won’t show it.

Meanwhile Daniela, Cassandra and Bela internally cringe when they see their mother lean over and kiss your cheek while waiting for desert.

“EWW mother! that’s gross!”

Donna Beneviento

She’s very terrified to tell her siblings about you, always anxious about what other people think about her.

However, you stand for none of that and pull her into a tight hug, assuring her that no matter what you’ll always love her.

After Miranda ended a family meeting and only the siblings remained, you cleared your throat to get the Lords attention.

Before you can even open your mouth to explain yourself Angie comes rushing around the corner with a huge grin on her face.

“THEY’RE DATING!! Aren’t they adorable?! You better think they’re adorable!”

Angie’s chaotic energy fills the room as she bounces from overly excited that she announced your relationship and threatening anyone that would think otherwise.

Donna waves her hand and Angie is summoned back to where she sits on her forearm. Your hand reaches down and takes her other hand that’s sitting by her side. Your fingers slot together perfectly as her slightly shaking and sweaty hands hold onto yours for dear life.

Alcina gives one of her large toothy grins, accentuated by her vibrant red lipstick.

“I must host a ball for the two of you at once!”

Moreau is slightly creeped out by Angie’s still very threatening stare but his smile is genuine as he beams at the two of you.

He’s super excited and definitely starts thinking of ways he can be a wingman to your relationship like planning dates, making gifts and maybe fishing out an old camera.

Karl having been rather close to you and Donna can’t be more happy for you both, especially Donna who he’s recently rekindled his friendship with.

He wraps her in a tight hug with his arms around her shoulder as he ruffles part of her hair.

“I’m really happy for you two, but don’t expect any of the sappy tears cause you ain’t getting any of it!”

Salvatore Moreau

It took a lot of failed attempts to get Salvatore to walk through the church’s door with his hand in yours.

After much trial and error, he’s finally ready to announce to his siblings about your relationship.

When you first walk in together, everyone is mildly shocked, you had been keeping it a secret for a while.

Alcina takes a long drag from her cigarette and points at your hands together, a smile breaking out on her face.

“It seems you’ve been busy Salvatore, I thought you never left that mine of yours but it seems I have been pleasantly surprised. I must say I am happy for you both.”

Pretty soon after, Angie comes running up to you and tugs on your leg. You look down at her as she jumps up and down with joy.

“Does that mean we’re like siblings now, you’re our in-law now!! You have to come and see the dolls Donna made! Ooh she can make you a doll for you and Sal!”

Heisenberg’s shock gets turned into bubbly laughter as he pats Salvatore on the back and looks over to you, excited as ever.

“I hope you’ve learnt how to get used to his nightly cheese obsession. I don’t know how you do it.”

You know he’s just being playful but deep down he’s still happy for the two of you in your relationship.

Eventually Mother Miranda arrives and you take your seat next to Salvatore, giving his shoulder a nudge and a playful wink as you hold his hand under the pew.

Karl Heisenberg

Karl has two moods when he thinks about announcing your relationship to his siblings.

It always varies between not giving a shit about what they say, being too tough to take criticism or rejection; ready to ignore whoever had something bad to say and completely freaking out that it could find its way back to Mother Miranda and be used against you both.

When you finally confide him to put down his tools, stump the cigar out and go over to his siblings and tell them he’s already boarder line freaking out.

The Lords stand at the ceremony cite, confused as to why they’ve been summoned without Miranda.

You stand there waiting for Karl to say something, as he stares back at you, pleading behind his glasses. You groan and face his siblings.

“Ugh fine i’ll do it you drama queen. EVERYONE! Karl and I are dating, there I said it for you!”

Alcina is the first to respond, cracking up with laughter as she sees her brother all embarrassed over such a small thing. She can’t deny that she’s happy for you and has known for a while that you were at least sweet on each other.

There have been many times where she’s caught you both staring at each other during family meetings or events and even heard whispers from the Duke about you both spending a lot of time together. Now her suspicions have been confirmed.

“My Dear, how you can stand him is beyond my knowledge but if he makes you happy then I welcome you into our family. Officially.”

Salvatore is beyond happy that you and Karl are together, knowing in some ways that the two of them are similar and have a habit of staying locked away in their respective domains without socialising with many people. So for him to hear that Karl finally found someone, he’s absolutely thrilled.

And Donna, well she’s so happy for the both of you. Both her and Angie love spending time with you and now that they’ve heard about your relationship she wants nothing more than to have lunch and talk for hours as you tell her all the little quirks about heisenberg that no one gets to see but you.

Soon all four lords make their way over to the Duke to get some lunch and any other supplies they might need. The whole time you hand is wrapped around Karl’s arm and you reach over to place a kiss on his cheek as he leans into you.

[freddie-weaselbee]

Real//F.W.

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Language, mentions of sex, I think that’s it ?

Summary: One small favor. A trade. That was all it was. Mutually beneficial! Until things between Fred and Y/N and their new relationship get a little more complicated and cause too many prying eyes. 

Prompts: Fake Dating with dialogue prompts “we could have prevented this!” and “did you know you talk in your sleep?”

Word Count: 4.7k

A/N: Day 3 of @theweasleyslut‘s 2k writing challenge

 “I’ve made my list of rules which you will abide by and under no circumstances will be broken. Number 1: this ruse does not leave the shop. I don’t want random people on the street questioning me because you couldn’t keep your huge mouth shut. Number 2: I will allow you to kiss me on the cheek and forehead as  often as you like, within reason of course, and you can give me a peck on the lips 3 times in total. I will keep track. And Number 3: Don’t take up the entire bed any more or I will be forced to push you onto the floor. Sound good?”

“Bloody hell, you are crazy aren’t you?”

“Just a little bit.”

Fred was starting to regret his previous decision of making this arrangement with you, but a jingle of his shop bell and glance at who was walking in quickly made those feelings disappear. 

“Deal,” he said, eyes not leaving the woman who had just entered. “But we start right now and I want one of those kisses.”

You looked up at your friend, confused at his sudden nerves before you followed his line of sight and understood immediately. You sighed and ruffled your hair a bit, looking for a mirror to fix your makeup. “I’m on it, give me a few minutes.”

Fred nodded, still watching his target walk slowly through the aisles of his store. As she turned a corner you ducked into the back office, waiting for a good time to reemerge. 

“Freddie!” A high pitched voice pierced through the ear, equal parts flirtatious and absolutely unbearable. Fred glanced up, pretending not to have noticed the girl before. Putting on a fake smile, he set down the product he was pretending to tinker with and placed his hands on the counter table. 

“Brooklyn, hi! How are you?” he asked, hoping his fake politeness would pass as genuine. 

“Ugh I am so good. So SO good actually,” she said, twisting a finger through her hair. “It’s been ages since I’ve seen you! I’m so glad you received my letter, I was hoping we could catch up, maybe over dinner sometime? I’ve had so many fine young men ask me out over the last few months, but none of them seemed to compare to you, my little Freddie Bear.”

He winced at the nickname, it bringing an onslaught of unwanted memories that he had desperately tried to forget. Brooklyn bit her lip and placed a hand on top of Fred’s, leaning in to accentuate her breasts and make sure Fred got a good whiff of her new perfume. 

Very calmly, Fred placed his other hand on top of hers, now sandwiched in between his strong grip. “Brooklyn,” he said, faking sympathy, “you’re a lovely girl, and I’m sure any guy would be lucky to have you, but--”

“Hey, love!” 

A voice interrupted Fred’s rejection, making a very surprised Brooklyn become absolutely enraged as she witnessed you come up and place a chaste kiss on Fred’s lips, smiling into him. Fred pulled his hands from Brooklyn’s grip and placed it instead on your hip, pulling you into him and placing another peck on your forehead. You both stared lovingly into each other’s eyes before a harsh cough stole your attention. 

“And who is this?” Brooklyn asked, arms crossed angrily. She was glaring daggers at you, not even trying to fake sweetness for Fred’s sake. 

Keeping his hand on your waist, Fred turned back to the girl who seemed as though she was about to explode. “That’s what I was trying to tell you Brooklyn,” he said, trying to keep his smile as pitiful as he could without it drawing suspicion. “This is Y/N, we’ve been seeing each other for a while now.”

You nuzzled into Fred’s chest for half a second before reaching a hand out to Brooklyn. “It’s so nice to meet you! Brooklyn, was it? I don’t think Fred’s ever mentioned you before, are you one of his childhood friends. Cousin, maybe?”

That had done it and you and Fred both knew it. He subtly fist bumped you under the counter as you watched the girl’s face become redder than Fred’s hair. 

She opened her mouth before taking a huge breath and stepping back. “No, actually,” she said through gritted teeth. “I’m his ex-girlfriend. I left him to move on to much better things. Speaking of which--” she flipped her hair and smoothed out her skirt, straightening her posture to try to keep what little dignity she had left, “--I actually have a date. With a dragon trainer no less, and a very renowned one.”

“Oh really?” Fred asked. “That’s amazing. My brother, Charlie, is a dragon trainer as well, and he’s very well known in the community. May I ask the name of the lucky young man? Maybe Charlie knows him.”

Caught very off guard, Brooklyn rolled her eyes and turned to face the door. “That’s none of your business. I better be going, before we’re late to dinner at a very nice place, somewhere the likes of you most likely couldn’t afford.”

You felt Fred stiffen next to you and you squeezed his hand gently. “Have a nice time! It was lovely to meet you Bridget.”

“It’s Brooklyn,” she seethed. 

“Oh right, silly me,” you said, shaking your head. “Bye!”

As Brooklyn sauntered out of the store, you turned to Fred and whispered seductively, just loud enough for the exiting girl to hear. “How about we have a nice night in tonight? I got something the other day that I’d love for you to see. Maybe after seeing it you’ll make me scream even louder than last night.” Fred’s face began to grow red and he had to discreetly adjust his pants, hoping you didn’t notice exactly what your words were doing to him. 

Brooklyn slammed the door and practically ran down the cobbled streets, only screaming when she thought she was far enough away to not be heard. You and Fred both waited a few seconds before cheering and hugging each other, him patting you on the back for a great performance. 

“Y/N! That was incredible! I knew I could count on you.”

“Yeah yeah,” you said, “I’m amazing, I know.” You smiled up at him completing the high five he was waiting on. “When you told me you needed help with a crazy ex I didn’t know you  meant like actually crazy. She’s insane! How did you put up with her for so long?”

Fred shrugged, jumping up onto the counter. “She was hot and I was horny. Not much else to it.”

You rolled your eyes, jumping up to join him. A few days ago you wouldn’t have been nearly comfortable enough to lounge out on the shop’s counters like you were now, but that was before you were a permanent resident of Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes. Before you and Fred had made the deal. 

“You want me to do what?”

“Please, Y/N, it would only be for a little while until this all dies down, I swear!”

You groaned and rubbed your temple, wondering how in the world a friendly visit to your friend’s shop would turn into something with much more commitment. 

“You’re telling me that you want me to pretend to be your girlfriend? Why on earth would you need that?”

You were pacing around the shop, trying to avoid customers as to not involve them in this very personal conversation. Fred followed you, pleading for you to help him like the great friend you were. 

“I told you,” he said, “after The Daily Prophet did that expo on the shop and made me and George out to be rich sexy businessmen, and I mean where’s the lie, all of my crazy exes have been sending me letters and trying to get back with me. I can’t stand it, there’s so many!”

“Yeah, you were never one for long-term relationships, were you?”

Fred hmphed but quickly picked up with his pleading once again. “You don’t understand, Y/N, it’s absolutely unbearable. It’s common knowledge that George and Angie have been going steady for years now, so he’s got pretty much no one after him. But me? I can’t handle it.”

He dramatically threw himself on one of the empty product tables, causing a couple kids to glance in your direction before quickly becoming distracted by one of the exploding jokes across the shop. 

“Oh, woe is me, I have too many beautiful women throwing themselves at me, whatever am I to do?” you mocked, earning a nasty glare from your friend. 

“I wouldn’t ask this of you if it wasn’t of upmost importance,” he said, straightening his tie and assuming a more business-like manner. “Those girls are crazy. Hot, yes, but crazy. And all you have to do is pretend to be dating me for a few weeks, a month at best! What do you say?”

“And what do I get out of this?” you asked. Usually, you’d never say no to helping a friend, especially Fred, but pretending to date him and having him practically use you to make other girls mad? You didn’t like the idea in the slightest. Well, maybe seeing the mad girls would be a bonus. You never cared much for most of the girls Fred went out with. 

Fred’s face turned into an upward grin as he rolled his sleeves up and leaned forward. “I was hoping you’d say that. I hear that you’re looking for a place to stay, is that right?”

You nodded hesitantly, having an idea of where he was going. 

“Well,” he said, pacing back and forth, “to keep up this charade we’ll need to convince everyone, including George and Angelina. You see, Angie’s friends with Alicia, one of the girls who’s been constantly OWLing me, and if she knew this was fake then she’d blow our cover for sure. Which means…”

You gulped. 

“You’d have the pleasure of sharing the loft with me. You’d get a room, shared with me, and a nice living space all rent-free, and all you have to do is act all lovey-dovey and occasionally snog me. That sounds like an offer you can’t refuse.”

Unfortunately, he was right. You were tight on money at the moment and really had no other options. It was a deal you had to make if you wanted to stay afloat, no matter how much annoyance and embarrassment it would cost you. 

Sighing, you let your shoulders slump, a sign of defeat. “You do know how to negotiate, don’t you?”

“Well I am a businessman.” Fred stuck out his hand, and with a slow, drawn out motion, you shook it. 

It was the 4th night of living with the Weasley twins, or maybe 5th? The nights all seemed to blend together as you’d been having more fun than you had since Hogwarts. George and Angelina didn’t seem surprised at all when you and Fred told them your made up story about how you and Fred started seeing each other. In fact, they both said they always knew it would happen. You and Fred shared a laugh about that in bed that night, before he decided to take up all of the space on the small piece of furniture, prompting you to write your third rule. 

Overall, it had been a great experience. Couples game night, movie marathons, gossip sessions with Angelina about you and Fred’s sex life (which you didn’t have to fabricate too much, you already knew too much from the incredible amounts of detail he used to provide about his dates with other girls). It was like being thrown back into a dorm room, and your old teenage self was starting to shine through again. 

You stared at yourself in Fred’s bathroom mirror, very proud of how you handled Brooklyn earlier that day. She was one of the few girlfriends of Fred’s you never got to meet, probably because they only dated for a short period of time before she left him for the first rich snob to bat an eye at her. Out of everyone you could think of that he dated, she was by far the worst, which meant the next few days would probably be more difficult. It was easy making that bitch angry with smoke coming from her ears, but you didn’t know how good you’d feel about lying to someone a lot nicer than she was. 

After brushing your teeth and donning your pajamas, your Hogwarts house colors of course, you crawled into bed and joined Fred, who was reading one of the novels you had recommended to him. “You like it so far?” you asked. 

Fred took off his reading glasses and nodded, setting a bookmark in the book before placing it on his nightstand. “Surprisingly, yes. I didn’t think it would be my thing, but so far it’s actually really good.”

“Told ya,” you said as you laid down beside him. You and Fred were comfortable enough to share a bed with few problems except for his stupid long legs. You’d been friends for years and had grown way too comfortable with each other, so squeezing together each night wasn’t too out of the ordinary. 

As you snuggled into the covers, Fred following suit, you mentally went over the schedule for the week. 

“How many girls are there again?” 

Fred paused for a moment, trying to remember what he had sent to each girl. “A few I was able to ward off via letter, the more sane ones, but there are still two more girls who insisted they pay me a visit. Addison’s coming tomorrow and Alicia the day after that.”

You nodded, although you ducted Fred could see it from his position. “Got it. Addison’s sweet, I liked her.”

Fred scoffed, wrapping an arm around your waist as he had started doing while you two slept. It was nothing more than platonic, Fred was just a touchy person. You told yourself he would do this with any semi-attractive girl laying in his bed. 

“Yeah, sweet girl all right, until you come home to your entire apartment torn apart cuz she thought you were cheating on her because apparently you ‘took an extra 12 minutes of lunch break and it seemed awfully suspicious.’”

Your body reverberated with a small giggle, remembering how Fred had to crash with you at your old place while he was trying to replace all the furniture she had literally torn up. “That’s right, she’s almost as crazy as I am.”

“Almost.”

You wouldn’t have a hard time lying to Addison, you decided. It was actually kind of fun when you did it with Brooklyn. You could get really creative with this one. 

You released a deep breath and closed your eyes, nestling back into Fred as he spooned you, claiming it was the only way he wouldn’t sprawl out and kick you in your sleep, which you knew was a lie. He’d find a way to kick you somehow. The git always did. 

------------------------------

“That was surprisingly better than expected!”

You nodded gleefully, handing Fred a scone and coffee that you had picked up from a nearby bakery. Scaring off Addison had been even more fun than Brooklyn, you and Fred really getting into character and being as lovey dovey as possible. She seemed to take it well, but you wouldn’t be surprised if she triggered the security system tonight trying to break in and destroy the shop. 

“And if I’m being honest it was actually kind of fun,” you told him, settling in behind the counter. 

You raised your muffin to your mouth to take a bite but Fred’s huge mouth snagged a taste before you could, bending down and taking a chunk out before you could have any. “That’s disgusting,” but you had no disgust lingering in your tone. 

“I agree,” he said through mouthfuls of muffin. “It was an excellent way to spend the morning. Bloody hell she would not leave!”

“At least she was nice about it.”

Fred reluctantly agreed before making another move to your muffin, one that this time you anticipated and you swatted his nose with a nearby newspaper. “You have your own, you greedy pig.”

He yanked the paper from your hand, using it as a napkin before the front page caught his eye. He quickly crumpled up the paper and tossed it into a nearby waste bin, something you wouldn’t have been suspicious of had he not done it so nervously. 

“Fred, what’s in the paper today?”

He shifted to put himself in between you and the wastebin, his tall figure looming over you. “Not important, just more junk that no one cares about.”

You didn’t believe him for a second. “Frederick Weasley you move this instant.” You tried pushing him out of the way but it was like moving an annoying ginger stone wall. Trying another approach, you darted to the left before doubling back and running right, but before you made it two steps he picked you up and threw you over his shoulder. “Fred!”

You wiggled with all your might and finally made it out of his grasp, snatching the paper and unfolding it to read the headline. 

Diagon Alley Playboy Finally Settling Down? Or Is Y/N L/N Just Another of Fred Weasley’s One Night Stands?

The color drained from your face and you slowly lowered the paper, reading the front page again and again. Attached was a blurry picture of you and Fred from the day before with you tucked into the side. The buggers at The Daily Prophet must’ve caught it through the store window. 

“I’m sorry,” Fred said softly, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. “I tried to keep things quiet, but I guess the press always finds a way in.”

You rubbed your temple slowly, trying to ignore the dread in your stomach. After seeing Harry Potter be brutally torn apart by the press for years, the last thing you wanted was rumors about you going around. 

"We could have prevented this!” you exclaimed, slamming the paper onto the desk. “This is complete bullshit. We’re not even dating! I swear I’m going to march straight to their office and--”

“Don’t bother,” Fred said, completely exasperated by the constant coverage of his family. “It does absolutely nothing, trust me. As a close relative to a professional Quidditch player, The Chosen One himself, and his two best friends who literally saved the world, we’ve learned that nothing will keep them away. Especially since they pinned me as the player of the Weasley family.”

“But you’re not!” you said, getting angrier by the second. “So your relationships don’t last long, so what? You’re not some womanizing piece of shit that the papers say you are!”

Chuckling, Fred replied. “I know that, and you know that. But the rest of the world wants drama, so if they want to think I have a new girl in my bed every night I’ll let them.” He shrugged. “You get used to it after a while.”

“Well you shouldn’t have to,” you grumbled. “You’re one of the best people I know, and the world should know it too.”

Catching you off guard, you felt a pair of arms wrap around your torso and a head lay on your shoulder. “It’s ok, love, just one more day and then you can stay out of the papers forever, I promise.”

Sighing, you turned to face him and let a small smile shine through. “Thanks. But I still think it’s absolute rubbish what they’re doing to your character.”

“Me too, but at least you know what a charming and caring gentleman I am and that’s all that matters to me.”

“Aww,” you coed, “you love me don’t you?”

“Shh, don’t let the press hear! It’ll ruin the image they worked so hard to create.”

You hit your head against Fred’s chest. “Only one more day of this. One more to go.”

------------------------------

“Do you know you talk in your sleep?”

“What?” You were so busy trying to find something to wear that you had barely heard what Fred said. 

“Last night, when you fell asleep. You said something funny.” He was sitting on the bed, adjusting his work tie and pulling on his socks and shoes. He looked...confused. Like he was trying to solve a complicated problem and he just couldn’t git the pieces together. 

“Oh?” you said, growing nervous. Had you dreamt last night? You were racking your brain, hoping you hadn’t said something embarrassing. 

You definitely had a dream, and Fred was there. You were at the shop...and Alicia came in! And…

“You were saying ‘Alicia, no, Fred’s mine not yours, I love Fred,” and umm, other stuff like that.” His face was heating up by the second, as was yours. 

“Really?” you said through awkward laughs. “Must’ve been preparing for today, huh?”

Fred said nothing, instead choosing to focus on retying his shoes. 

“Well,” you said, finally picking out your outfit, “I’m going to change, I’ll meet you down there later, ok?”

He nodded, still confused, and you rushed to use his bathroom before things could get more awkward. 

You decided to take a nice, long shower to cool down, hoping that you could somehow wash away the embarrassment. So maybe you had a slight crush on Fred. Who could blame you? You’d been spending the last week cuddled up with him and spending so much time at the shop, not to mention acting like a couple in front of everyone. Who wouldn’t develop feelings?

But for some weird reason you had a feeling that this wasn’t a recent crush, rather something that’s been lurking right beneath the surface for a while. You groaned, hitting your head against the shower wall. This was not the time for this. You had a job to do, and Alicia would be here in 30 minutes so you had to hurry up. 

Scampering down the steps 15 minutes later after using a drying spell and getting dressed, you stopped in your tracks when you saw what was happening across the shop. Alicia was here early. 

From the looks of it, she had already made herself comfortable, leaning in to talk to Fred, who wasn’t doing anything to discourage the behavior. Instead, he was leaning in as well, laughing at a joke she just made. 

Fury burned inside you as you watched the scene unfold. You knew from the beginning that Alicia would be the hardest ex to deal with. Not only had she been Fred’s longest and most intimate relationship to date, but she was also a really nice person, meaning you had no reason to hate her. But at this moment you did. 

Alicia leaned closer, her nose almost touching Fred. What should you do? Did he want your help getting rid of her? Was he still harboring feelings and actually looking to reconnect? You saw him slowly lean in toward her, which you took as a sign to continue with your plan. 

You were almost running when you reached Fred, who turned and seemed happy to see you. “Just in time,” he said the Alicia, “Alicia, you remember--”

You cut him off with a kiss, the third kiss you’d promised him. Except this one wasn’t one of the pecks you described on your terms and conditions. You pulled Fred down into one of if not the most passionate kiss you’d ever had, wrapping your arms around his neck and drawing him closer to you. 

Almost immediately he pulled off of you, looking more bewildered than you had ever seen him. “I…”

“Well that was quite the spectacle.”

You looked over to where Alicia was standing, smirking at the two of you. Contrary to what you had expected, she actually seemed rather calm and actually amused at what she had just seen. 

“S-sorry,” you said. Fred tried to say something but he was too dumbstruck to even get a word out. He just stood there, eyes wide and mouth twitching. 

“Is this a bad time?” she asked. “I’m supposed to be meeting my fiancé for breakfast later so I can just come back another time if that works for you.”

“Your...fiancé?”

“Yeah!” Alicia beamed as she showed you her left hand, her ring finger adorned with the most beautiful engagement ring you’d ever seen. “Actually, the reason I’m here is because I just asked Fred if he wanted to be in the wedding as a groomsman. Or bridesmaid. Whatever works for him. Thankfully the big oaf said yes before you laid that on him, or else I think I’d be waiting a lot longer for an answer.”

Fred was still as frozen as ever, making you and Alicia chuckle. “Hey, it’s been forever since we’ve caught up, how about you and Fred go on a double date with me and Lee sometime?”

It took you a second to understand why Lee would be there, until it dawned on you. “You’re marrying Lee Jordan?!”

She couldn’t hold back her laughter at this, loving to see your reaction. “That I am! You’re obviously invited, I’m sending invitations out soon. I’ll hope to see you there, and don’t be afraid to reach out, alright?”

“Y-yeah, will do,” you said. Alicia looked up at Fred and then to you and winked, before waving goodbye and leaving the shop. 

You refused to make eye contact with Fred, too embarrassed to even begin to talk to him. Maybe you’d just take 5 and take a walk down the street? That would help distract your brain from whatever just happened. 

“Real?”

You turned around to the source of the voice, a now more interactive Fred. “What?”

“Real,” he repeated. He shook his head a few times, blinking rapidly. “Sorry, I just mean, that kiss was umm, it was real.”

Your breath hitched in your throat. The fact that you had kissed Fred, and an actual kiss at that, was finally hitting you. “Yeah, it was real, I guess.”

He took a step closer, his face assuming the puzzled look from the bedroom earlier. “Was...was what you said real too? From the dream, I mean?”

Now it was you who was frozen, feet stuck to the ground with no way out. What should you say? Confess your feelings and hope for the best? Or deny everything and try to work your way around this mess? You didn’t have time to think nor ration. Just act. 

“Yeah. It was real.”

Fred nodded, pursing his lips and shifting his weight from foot to foot. “Cool.” He hesitated. “Would it be super crazy out of the blue if I asked you to maybe go out with me sometime. For real?”

A smile rose to your face, hoping that this wasn’t a joke. Slowly, almost shyly, you nodded. “Yeah, it would be a little crazy. But I’d say yes.”

Fred smiled too, a big toothy grin that only made you smile wider, before pulling you into a side hug. “Good, because you’re a little crazy too, so we’ll match on our date.”

“You’re a big dork,” you said, returning the hug. “What will the paper say when they see you with the same girl? They’ll probably explode!”

“I hope so,” he replied as he gave you a loving squeeze. “What I’m worried about is how we’re supposed to explain to George and Angelina that we’ve been faking this whole time and it’s only now getting real.”

“Eh, that’s a problem for another time. Right now, we’ve got some more pressing matters.” You gestured to the front window where a reporter was holding a huge camera, trying to snap a good picture of the two of you. 

“I’ll handle it, grab me the dungbombs.”

“Yes, sir!”

You ran to assist Fred, head rushing with thoughts of first dates and future ones down the road. Of attending Lee and Alicia’s wedding together and getting completely wasted with each other. Of sleeping together each night, holding each other in an embrace that was now true and deep and caring. In a relationship that was now real. 

Tag List:

@famdomhideout @amourtentiaa

[creatingnikki]

What 2020 has taught me

1. Those things that seem like content for sci fi or pure fiction are actually things that can happen. To the entire world. Like a pandemic. And to you. Like a seizure.

2. Everyone is sad. Everyone is struggling. In different ways and in different measures. Makes no one special. But you still get to feel sad for yourself and be compassionate towards others. But it's also okay to draw boundaries because you're everyone too. Remember, not special? You're sad and trying to deal with it too.

3. Every job you have will not add value to your life. It will not teach you new things or give you people you'll want to stay in touch with. Sometimes some jobs will only be a season of your life. Even if the season lasts for over a year. It's okay.

4. You know how you thought picking a college and picking a major and picking your first job and picking a specific industry were all the career decisions you had to make? Yeah, no. It's never a one time thing. You could have a job as a marketing strategist for two years and then want nothing to do with it. And then you'll have to make another decision and work towards it. So I'd like to call it moves. It's like chess. You always have to make a move. And it always has to be strategic, yes. But the truth is in your 20s it probably won't. Even if you try. And as long as you're trying, you'll be fine.

5. You may have different sorts of friends like the one you only talk to about kdrama with or the one you met when you went book shopping alone and the friendship is all about books really. That's normal. But irrespective of why and how you became friends with them, if you consider them a friend then there has to be this basic sense of care, respect and empathy for each other. I don't care what people want to say. If you're faced with the worst trauma of your life, the least your friends can do is check up on you regularly. On text. And if they don't even do that then guess what? They aren't friends. They are acquaintances. Social media and quick promises make everyone seem like your friend. But they are not. They are just nice people who will be nice to you for specific periods and then wander away like you are a speck of dust floating in their journey.

6. You speak a lot and write and you express yourself and you’re emotionally mature but oh my god. You still hold in so much. You’ve known that at a subconscious level and over the last year people - experts - have told you that. You have also realized that you make your pain and sadness about pettier things because dealing with them, admitting about them, sharing that with your friends, is easier. You do that so that you don’t have to deal with the real stuff. Because it’s so damn painful. And you don’t know how to do it. Yet. Acknowledging is the first step anyway right? I know you’re confused about how exactly to let go of all this pain and sadness and feel lighter, and you know that talking to people really isn’t the solution, but I also know you’re smart enough to figure it out. 

7. Talking about being smart...you know you’re different than others. Better. Special. Smarter. None of these are the right words. And you never voiced this out until this year because you knew it would make you come across as narcissistic. Some would say it’s because you’re an INFJ. But my mother once said that this may be the first time we are consciously living life but our souls are old and so our instinct and the things we know but can’t explain are because this isn’t the first time for our souls. The connections we feel with certain people, the reason we are so different from our siblings who grew up in the exact same environment with the exact same opportunities, our sense of right and wrong...it’s all because our souls learn and grow with each time and that’s why we are who we are. I think that’s probably how I can explain what I have always felt. That I am living in a different universe than everybody but I have to pretend to be in this one and dumb my emotions and thoughts down. Maybe that’s because my soul has lived through thousands of years while most around me are living their 100th life. Or maybe I’m just narcissistic, who knows?

8. You shift between talking in first person and second person but that’s because that’s how you think in your head and talk to yourself and live your life. You ask yourself things and you accuse yourself of things and you apologize to yourself and you comfort yourself. I think that seeps into your writing and the changing of the voices. 

9. You always genuinely thought that you’d not be afraid of dying. And then what happened this October proved you shockingly wrong. I know it’s not so much being afraid of dying but the unbearable pain of knowing what that would mean to your family. So you have to be more prudent and less reckless with your life and the choices you make. 

10. Regret is not something that plagued you but this year the realisation and pain of giving away your favourite books from your own personal collection to people you care about as a show of affection and them turning out to be ass holes or losers has hit you so hard. So, yes. No more of that shit. I really fucking want my copy of The Perks Of Being A Wallflower back. UGH. With the childhood picture of me inside it! 

11. Sleeping at 5 am in the morning stops being fun or romanticised when you realise just how much harm it does to your body and mind. Literally every single disease and disorder can be traced back to a shitty fucking sleep schedule. It’s not just the hours you sleep but also the quality of sleep and the time you sleep at. So yes sleeping for 8 hours is healthy but not if that 8 hours is from 5 am to 12 pm. ‘Not a morning person’ is just another construct of capitalism and you don’t realise how many industries profit from having you believe that and staying up late or all night. Entertainment. Food. Alcohol. Pharma. Biologically and naturally you are a bloody morning person. And you don’t need 3 cups of coffee to begin your day or your phone notifications to get you to open your eyes and brain to wake up. 

12. Sometimes you really have to stop taking people so seriously. I know the idea of treating people as casual friends or entertainment makes you want to fight that concept but you know what? Some people like Pineapple are ever only going to be good for that. No matter how much they ‘grow and change’. So keep them in the background for whenever you want some entertainment or drama. But please don’t clear up your busy schedule to meet them or send them gifts on their birthday. 

13. If you don’t have the fruit juice or green juice within half an hour of making it then you are losing out on its most optimum health benefits. Or when you remove the white stringy stuff from oranges. That’s where all the actual nutrients are.

14. I am privileged and so are most of the people I interact with. The global pandemic has been hell for a lot of people around the world. Health wise. Financially. Losing people they care about. But I was blessed enough to be safe at home and have a job that I could smoothly do from home and not have a pay cut or 4-hour long Zoom meetings. So honestly when my friends tell me 2020 has been bad I have to stop and ask them why? Yes, the crippling uncertainty and anxiety is not something that can be undermined. But most people I know had very great positive life-changing milestones this year like moving away to another country for college or taking their first solo trip or getting married. So I have to ask them. Because I am not going to agree that everybody’s 2020 and pandemic narrative is the same. 

15. Money gets spent really quickly. When I left my job earlier this year because of personal issues, I thought I had enough savings to last me a year. Full disclosure - I mean to last my personal expenses because I live with my parents. But it didn’t even last me 3 months. And so to use money wisely and buy things that provide utility than instant gratification is something to follow. Also buying one pair of really expensive but quality shoes is better than buying 5 pairs of affordable but low quality shoes that will have a very short life and force you to buy more. I know that higher price doesn’t always mean better quality but sometimes it does. And as an adult now I want to do the whole quality > quantity thing even with things and not just people. 

16. Everyone in their 20s went through a crisis of what they should do with their lives and their careers and it’s not unique to the 21st century and the challenges of today. Whether it was Vincent Van Gogh in the 19th century or Sylvia Plath in the 20th, every single person, as brilliant as them went through the torture of making these decisions and living with their consequences. You may think I picked wrong examples for they both killed themselves but you know what? They were the people who really want to live more than anyone. They knew what life meant. And maybe if mental health help was more accessible back then their lives would be longer and more peaceful. 

17. Telling people everything is overrated. You don’t have to talk about every single thing that’s on your mind or that’s going on in your life. The good and the bad and the mediocre. You have to be mindful about how much of yourself you’re giving away. 

18. Re-watch Suits when people at work feel intimidating because the confidence + negotiation tactics that they show can actually work irl cos at the end of the day no matter in what position you’re dealing with people who have emotions and fears and insecurities and desires. You understand how to leverage that nobody can get the better of you. 

19. You belong to yourself. No matter how much you love someone or how much they have done for you or how much you owe them - you belong to yourself. You can’t live your life for someone else. Everyone belongs to themselves first. No relationship, no promise, no circumstance should make you feel like you have to give up your life and make it all about them. If and when the time comes to die for them, go ahead. Take a bullet. Donate that kidney. Write them in your will. But live your life for yourself. And let them live theirs. 

20. Twenty three was a challenging year. When it started you claimed the age 23 sounds boring and insignificant. Guess it proved you wrong. It hurt so much now. But that only means you’ll look back on it later and see how it added so much wisdom and resilience to your being. It doesn’t mean that it makes all the bad things that happened to you okay. Or that you should be grateful to them. Fuck no. It means that you should be kinder to yourself because at the end of the day, your mind and body find it in themselves to deal with whatever is thrown their way. They have your back. It’s time you learn to sit straight. 

[seokjinsonlyone]

Not My Type | 3

pairing: jungkook x female reader

summary: "She's a lot more than nice, so you need to be careful."

genre: friends to lovers

warnings: none; jimin here tho being flirty and stirring the pot <3333

rating: pg

wc: 1.7k

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

Jungkook’s newfound hobby was driving her crazy. One too many times had their little lunch rendezvous made its way into her mind in the past week. The way he sniffed her hair oddly enough was a recurring playback. She had a thing for weirdos and Jungkook could definitely be classified as that. And, that was exactly why she needed to shut this whole thing down.

Now, she considered herself a progressive individual. She didn’t mind change as long as it was for the better. She didn’t have a problem evolving her relationship with a friend. In fact, she preferred it. Always said that if she was gonna get into it, she wanted to be with a friend. But, this particular friendship wasn’t the one. It wouldn’t make sense. There was no way it could possibly be better.

They were like oil and water. They didn’t mix. Which was fine as a friendship, they could peacefully coexist. Anything more than that, however, would be an unnecessary burden. And, her life didn’t need to be anymore difficult than it already was. She wanted an easy love. It was this line of reasoning that carried her straight to her best friend’s house.

“You need to talk to your friend,” she announced, waltzing into Jimin’s home, throwing her purse on the couch before finding him sitting at the island eating cereal.

He looked up. “I’ve already told you should just ask Taemin out. He’ll most likely say yes. He thinks you’re hot. Stop trying to get me to create scenarios.”

“And, I’ve already told you I refuse to pursue a man. No matter how dreamy and evil he is,” she sighed.

In all honesty, she probably would’ve gone for it if it weren’t for the fact that she could tell he wasn’t really into her. Not in the way she would’ve liked for him to be into her. He flirted with her in person (and in her dms), held her in a way that made her stomach jump after a few drinks, but ultimately his goal was a few nights in the sheets. And, that just wasn’t her thing. She didn’t do casual. Didn’t like to invite people into her life that weren’t going to stay. So even though she thought they could be good together, she was deciding to let this one go. If he couldn’t see what was right in front of him that was on him.

“You’re gonna end up alone.”

“You must realize that I am my favorite person.” He rolled his eyes. “Anyway, I wasn’t talking about him. I was talking about Jungkook.”

“What he do?”

“He’s been acting weird ever since last week.”

“What happened last week?”

She sucked her teeth. “You know, when we were all here?”

He narrowed his eyes at her, pupils shifting from side to side, visibly racking his brain trying to recall what happened at his place last week. “Oh! Wednesday! I was so drunk, bro. What happened?”

“Ugh. You don’t remember asking me to rank all of y’all from most to least my type?” Typical Jimin. Cause trouble then dip.

“What’d you rank me?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

“I ain’t doing this again.”

He dropped his legs from the footrest of the barstool, tugging her closer and wrapping an arm around her waist. “Mmm. You couldn’t handle me either way.”

She’s not gonna lie, her heart skipped a beat. But, that’s the only reason he did it in the first place. He knew it flustered her on some level. So, she decided to play along for once, bringing her hand up to toy with the hair that rested at the back of his neck. “Baby boy, I could make you cry,” she whispered seductively.

He made a face, then pushed her away turning his attention back to his cereal. “You’re gross.”

“You started it,” she accused, laughter bubbling up at his reaction. He was CEO of “Do as I say, not as I do.” Always in the mood to dish it out, but hardly able to take it in return.

“So, what’s going on? Why do I need to talk to him?”

“Because I told him he wasn’t my type, and now he’s trying to convince me that he is.”

He choked. “What?”

“He literally showed up at my work the other day and brought me lunch.”

“That was more so directed at you saying Jungkook isn’t your type.”

“He’s not.” He raised his eyebrows, smirking conspiratorially. “He isn’t,” she insisted.

“So, you didn’t used to drool over him when you two first met?”

“See why you gotta go and bring up the past.” She wouldn’t say that she had a full blown crush on him, she didn’t know him and therefore couldn’t actually like him, but for a minute she was down bad. She wasn’t expecting to meet him when she did. Jimin had wanted to hang out and asked for a ride. He was with Jungkook when she picked him up and she was effectively caught off guard. Before she even realized what she was doing, she was out of the car and shaking hands with him in greeting. The next few weeks were spent trying her hardest to be in his presence. She never said more than two words to the boy, but yeah she was down bad. Once her hormones subsided, though, they eventually developed a friendship. A friendship that needed to stay a friendship. “Besides, I never said he wasn’t hot. I’m saying our personalities don’t match up. It wouldn’t work.”

“You aren’t that different from each other.”

“Yeah, but we’re wrong in just the right ways. It wouldn’t work.” He was right in saying that weren’t all that dissimilar, but it was because of that that she was sure starting any kind of relationship with romantic intent would go up in flames. The two were like parallel lines. Never meant to cross. Adjacent, but never intersecting. As they should.

“It sounds to me like you’re just afraid of what could happen.”

“Hold on there partner. I didn’t come here to be lectured or psychoanalyzed. I don’t even think he likes me for real, but he’s heading down a slippery slope. I just want you to talk to him before he goes and starts something that’s gonna get his feelings hurt, alright?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll see what I can do.” One thing about Jimin was that he was nosy. Had absolutely zero qualms about getting all up in other people’s business. Knowledge equals power is what he always told himself. So, if she hadn’t come to him voluntarily offering up this information, he would’ve picked up on it sooner or later, inserting himself in the middle of it all. As it stands, he’s been giving explicit permission to do some digging. All he has to do is wait for the opportunity to arise.

The opportunity came a few days later. Jungkook was sitting on his couch, phone in hand, completely zoned out when Jimin pounced.

“So... Y/N?”

Jungkook startled at the mention of her name. It wasn’t like he was just thinking about her. He definitely wasn’t about to text her. He hadn’t spent the past minutes in a daze typing, deleting, and retyping messages to send. Nope. “Huh?”

“Y/N? What’s going on with you and her?” Jimin asked again.

“What do you mean? Nothing’s going on,” he feigned innocence, voice raising an octave. Even though, for all intents and purposes, there really wasn’t anything going on.

He looked him up and down, raising an eyebrow. “That’s not what she said.”

“What did she say?” She talked about him?

“You tell me.” He smirked sitting down, crossing one leg over the other like some kind of therapist.

“I don’t know. We had lunch,” he mumbled.

“Why?”

“Because I thought she might be hungry.”

“And this has nothing to do with the fact that she said you’re not her type?”

He blew raspberries into the air. He couldn’t lie to Jimin even if he tried. The man always managed to see right through him. A consequence of nearly ten years of friendship. “I’m just trying to get to know her better,” he insisted.

“Why?”

“Because she’s nice.” Which wasn’t the complete truth, but if he admitted that he thought she had stars in her eyes he’d never hear the end of it.

“She’s a lot more than nice, so you need to be careful.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means that she’s one of the best people I know, but she’s stubborn and once she has an idea in her head it’s very hard for her to let go.”

“So you think I should stop?”

“I think you shouldn’t go into this blind, is all I’m saying. Whatever you’re doing, probably won’t be easy. And, I don’t want you to get hurt. Or hurt her. What do you plan on doing if you manage to make her like you? If you’re not serious then I think you should stop.” Jimin patted his shoulder, then got up leaving him to his thoughts.

Jungkook heard what he was saying. He did. And, he was right. He hadn’t been thinking too hard about what he was doing. Honestly, he was just following the skip in his heartbeat and so far that led him to her. There was a very real possibility of him getting his feelings hurt. She was very strong willed. Couldn’t budge her mind with a bulldozer. So, if she was dead set on being against this, there wasn’t much he could do anyway.

Still, this wasn’t something he could let go of easily. He had no intentions of hurting her. It wasn’t just some conquest for him. That much he was sure of. He would hate to get closer to her, have her catch feelings for him, then dip because he wasn’t feeling it. But, he seriously doubted that would happen. It’s not like they were complete strangers. He was just seeing her in a new light now. And as much as he didn’t want anyone to get hurt, at this point he didn’t know if this was something he should even avoid. It didn’t seem like it.

Truthfully, he didn’t feel this way often. This pull he now felt toward her. He was usually much too caught up in trying to be the best version of himself he could be to entertain thoughts of others. However, right now she had his attention and he didn’t want to look away. He opened his text thread with her typing and finally sending a message before he could overthink it.

[10:53pm] jk: lunch tomorrow?

[newtonsheffield]

Can you do Anthony’s reaction when someone disrespects Kate at work or in her personal life about her relationship with Anthony or her job position? Anthony defending her and Kate loving him all the more and/or maybe slightly annoyed.

Hello! I’m so sorry that this request has been just... collecting dust in my inbox I’m truly the worst! And I’m doing something even more reprehensible and combining it with another request ugh! I know! I know! I Will get better at this I promise!!! 

Another Anon asked: Can you write about Kate defending the Bridgertons? I feel like someone would bad mouth them and Kate would totally stand up against them and everyone would be impressed. 

Okay! On with the show this is also kind of related to a post I made ages ago about a dude objectifying Kate at her University reunion but I can’t find it. Anyway, Dudebro David is back.

“Oh Fuck!” Kate had sighed when Lucy had handed her her schedule this morning, glancing down the list, her eyes rolling when she saw the name David Warner listed as Mr Smith’s divorce attorney. Lucy’s eyebrows widened, her hand fiddling with the engagement ring on her left hand a little nervously.  “Is something wrong?”  Kate sighed “No, I just... I know Mr Smith’s attorney from university. We... didn’t date exactly we just...” Kate trailed off awkwardly. Lucy made a surprised little noise.  “Oh. Well. This should be... interesting.” She said, a small smirk starting on her lips. Kate had tutted.  “David is a professional, I’m a professional. It’ll be fine.” 

It was not fine. From the very moment he’d arrived David Warner, his square jaw set, his hair swept back with a little too much product, had been... snarky at best. He’d pulled Kate in by the arm leaving a kiss against her cheek that had made her want to cringe.  “Sheffield! It’s good to see you!” He’d said, a smirk on his face, his hand dropping to her waist. Kate had pulled back, nudging his hand from her and said sharply,  “David. I trust you’ve been well.” hoping to discourage him. It did not work. His eyes had flicked over her as they’d sat at the conference table, settling on the rings on her left hand, narrowing a little. And then he’d really started, He’d shot down every attempt at civility, glared at her, made several unseemly inferences. And Kate couldn’t help but wonder if he’d always been this disgustingly misogynistic. She was relieved when Lucy finally stood and said briskly,  “I’ll show you out Mr & Mrs Smith.” And yet David Warner had lingered as they’d walked through the hall 

“I can’t believe Kate Sheffield sold out!” He said, smirking irritatingly, and Kate could feel the thin strand of her patience fraying slightly further. “You also work for a well known firm David, I can’t imagine your billable hours are worth much less than mine.” She said, a tight smile on her face, desperate to end this interaction. David laughed a little humourlessly “We both know I was always going to do this. Kate Sheffield was going to save the world.” Kate bit back a tut, forced herself to remain civil as she said  “Well circumstances change David.” her voice cold when she thought about the real reason she’d come straight back to London after graduating. David opened his mouth to say something else, a sneer forming on his lips though what he was going to say she would never know.  “Kate, honey, there you are I was just going to pick up Edmund from-” Anthony said appearing in the bullpen from his office rather suddenly his eyes widening in surprise ad slightly odd recognition as he took in David. Perhaps they’d worked opposite one another before.  “Oh! Sorry!” Anthony finished awkwardly. David’s expression dropped into something curiously like disgust forming on his face. Anthony cleared his throat. “David wasn’t it? We met at your reunion I believe.” Anthony’s voice was tight, a warning almost, as his hand went out in front of him. Kate felt her eyebrows shoot upwards in surprise. David eyed Anthony’s hand, the sneer coming to his face all over again as he looked between Kate and her husband. 

“And here he is. The second way you sold out Kate: Mr Anthony Bridgerton!” David’s voice was dripping his derision, his jaw set, his eyes narrowed Kate felt her mouth open in surprise a little at the statement, felt Anthony’s arm tighten protectively around her waist.  “Was it getting on your knees for the most notorious man in London that changed your circumstances Kate?” David continued, chuckling to himself a little “You know, they say law’s a bit of an old boys club but it sure must be easy for you girls to sleep your way into a partnership. And The Bridgerton’s? Of all people Kate I mean come on!” Kate felt her patience finally snap, but apparently Anthony’s patience had frayed much quicker. His voice was cold fury when he spoke  “Mr. Warner, I’m afraid I’m going to ask you not to speak to my colleague that way, I don’t tolerate disrespect towards the employees of this firm in any way. Even less do I tolerate it towards my wife, Sir. Kate is extremely capable, far more than some and was promoted on professional merit alone, I assure you.” He finished coldly, his jaw set, his arm moving as though to move Kate behind him to shield her from what was being said. Kate refused to move, anger building in her chest., she could see Gregory moving closer towards their small group, his arms crossed. David sneered again,

“Come on Bridgerton, pretty honourable for you to marry her afterwards I’ll admit, and I’ll admit from what I remember it might have been worth-” He said, cutting himself off as Anthony lunged towards David his hand thrown out, likely to throttle the man, stopping only when Kate caught his arm, her voice surprising even her in its softness  “Anthony don’t.” Anthony’s posture relaxed, turning back towards her, his eyes softening immediately, Kate felt her own anger ebb away as their eyes caught. 

“He’s not worth it.” She said softly, and then turning towards her former acquaintance “David, if you’re a tenth as smart as you pretend to be you’ll stop talking.” His mouth opened, sneer still fixed in place, Kate shook her head  “David, maybe my life did go down a different road than I thought it would, but you’re exactly where you were ten years ago, tearing other people down to make yourself look bigger, and I feel sorry for you. My life is absolutely none of your business, and it has no impact on my ability to do my job. Which by the way, one of us graduated top of their class, the other scraped out of the bottom ten.” Kate finished, feeling a little smug at David’s mouth falling open in surprise. Anthony arm wrapped around her waist again, she could see the smug smile on his face, his thumb rubbing along the rings on her left hand. 

“I am extremely proud of my association with the Bridgerton family, David. And we look out for one another.” Kate said lightly, turning towards Gregory who was standing behind Kate, his arms crossed, doing his best to look imposing despite his bowtie  with Mario and Luigi in a jumping high five, their hands meeting at the knot. “Gregory, could you show Mr. Warner out, please.” Kate finished, tugging Anthony from the scene as Gregory gave her a kiss on the cheek before gripping David Warner tightly by the upper arm. 

Anthony remained unnervingly silent as Kate pulled him into her own office. His jaw still set in anger as Kate slowly collected her things before turning to her husband, whose eyes were glistening. Her stomach swooped uncomfortably. “You shouldn’t listen to the things he said about you, Anthony.” Kate said, reaching her hand out and running her fingers through his hair. Anthony’s eyes, which had closed at the contact, shot open again at the end of her sentence. His voice came out choked. “Kate, I’m upset because of what he said about you. I’m trying to stop myself from running after him and strangling him.” Kate’s heart clenched at the earnestness in his voice “Anthony, I don’t care what he says about me. I don’t care what anyone says anymore.” And it was true, truly the only emotion she’d felt as she’d stood listening to his words was surprise. David had never really been the type of person to say insults to someone’s face, if he hadn’t insulted Anthony’s family, truly she would have been more impressed at the guts it had taken to say what he’d said about her.  “We both know what really happened, right?” Anthony nodded quickly in response “And that’s all that matters. I really do love you you know.” She finished standing slightly on her toes to kiss him lightly as Anthony hummed happily, his posture relaxing. “I love you too, Kate. And you, really are the most incredible person I know.” He said wrapping her in a tight hug, his chin resting on her head, they stayed wrapped together for several moments before Kate chuckled to herself. Pulling back, with a smirk on her face she said,

“And besides Mr. Bridgerton, we both know only one of us has gotten on their knees in this office, and it wasn’t me. Now let’s go and collect our Son.” tugging Anthony from the office laughing as he puffed his chest out and said  “You’re damn right. And I’d do it again.”                   

[falcor-thee-luck-dragon]

Don’t Feed The Flames - Bucky Barnes x (f)reader, Natasha x platonic (f) reader

Summary: Bucky has made you angry after a tough mission with the crew, why you ask? Apparently he thinks it’s totally fine to run inside a burning building to help you complete the mission in question. 

Warning: bit of angst, mostly a good time with the team, Bucky fluff shoved in ur welcome

-reader has fire powers btw, I don’t wanna confuse anyone lol

Masterlist

The mission was difficult to say the least, successful in its own right, but tough for everyone involved. All the Avengers were needed for this clusterfuck of a mission, minus Bruce and Thor who are elsewhere in the universe, lucky them.

All the team needed to do was infiltrated one of the last highly armed Hydra bases left in existence, get rid of the artillery and boom, slither right on in. Objective? Snatch valuable intel as to where the other bases are hiding, and surprise surprise, you and Wanda had to take care of some very pissed off experimentees who were unfortunately brainwashed beyond the point of helping them recover.

Ending the night in everyone quickly evacuating the premise with the essentials while you stayed back to blow up the base to nothing more then bricks and ash. Although during this, Bucky stayed back to shoot some freelancers who tried to take you the fuck out, with what would you know it; flame throwers.

Apparently Hydra is greatly lacking in weapons and functioning brain cells, among other things. Granted, you understood Bucky’s concern for your well-being when he ran into the fire. But oh dear lord were you not happy with him one goddamn bit.

Luckily Sam was able to pluck him out before anything fell on your idiot boyfriend while you were producing mass destruction in the giant airplane storage area. In the aftermath, you came out unharmed but covered in smudge marks and burnt off cloves yet again.

Bucky? Well he came away with a pissed off girlfriend and his life to say the least. And let’s just say the long four hour ride back was a tad bit awkward, even if you were too damn exhausted to show your irritation with Bucky. The team sure as hell knew he wasn’t going to be spared of your wrath when the jet landed.

It took approximately ten seconds for your man to shuffle out of your line of sight, using Steve as a shield to hide behind while they walked out. You had been distracted when Natasha asked for something picked up, then suddenly your mind was on Bucky. A moment later you stomped out of the Quinjet in pursuit of the one and only James Buchanan Barnes as he awaited your fury.

“James!” You growl fiercely, “You are the most fucking reckless person I’ve ever fucking met and I’m literally friends with Tony!” You snap while the rest of your teammates go about their business, trying to listen yet smartly staying out of everything.

“I know.” Mutters Bucky like a kicked puppy suffering his mother’s wrath, blue eyes looking at you with regret clearly visible on his handsome face.

“You know! You know!? Then why the fuck would you just run into the flames like that!” You shout while throwing your arms into the air in frustration, “You’re not fire proof Bucky!”

“Y/N...”

“Do you have a goddamn death wish!?” You interrupt, giving him a dumbfounded look as he glances from Steve to the floor then back to you again, trying to find something or someone with enough pity to help him. 

He finds none, “Well....no.” Your brows raise yet again at his short and annoyingly blunt answers to make up for his stupidly daring boldness. 

“Then why-ugh, whatever never mind.” You dismiss with a wave of your hand before quickly turning on your heels to walk for the metal doors into the main part of the facility, while the others keep their distance from your heated state.

“Wait Y/N, come back I’m sorry!” Exclaims Bucky desperately while you continue to ignore your reckless man, “You’re right I shouldn’t have....ugh...come on babe....shit...” Mutters Bucky as he watches you leave him in such a heated state.

“Dude just let her cool off, oh uh well....no pun intended.” Jokes Sam with a shrug as Bucky watches you stomp away in frustration, your body almost sizzling with actual flame.

“I didn’t mean to....well...ugh, shit I guess I kind of did.” Admits Bucky with a sigh, rubbing the back of his neck as you slam the door shut with a loud thud, “Sometimes I forget fire can’t hurt her. I should have just let her handle the burning building herself instead of going inside when she uh, told me not to.”

Steve walks out of the Quinjet with a bag in hand to greet the two, “Y/N seemed a bit...”

“Pissed off.” Adds Sam with a light chuckle as Bucky frowns at the giant glass window.

“Yeah.” Mutters Steve awkwardly as he side eyes Bucky, “Well ugh, see you guys at dinner, I think Wanda and Vision are getting takeout from somewhere.”

“See ya Steve.”

“Bye.”

Sam and Bucky watch as Steve heads for the metal doors, soon he’s gone and the two are the only Avengers left in the giant parking garage of sorts.

“She’s going to hate me for the rest of the day I know it.” Sadly mutters Bucky, already missing your beautiful face no matter what state your in.

“I wouldn’t say it’s hate.”

“She’s going to be very disappointed in me then.”

“Yeah probably.”

Bucky gives him an offended look, “You’re supposed to say something uplifting or positive.”

“Man don’t look at me for relationship advice. This is Y/N we’re talking about, just give her a couple hours she’ll simmer down.” Inquirers Sam with a friendly pat on the back before he starts walking away for the door, as casually and unbothered as ever.

Bucky keeps silent for a moment while his mind swims with what to do next, suddenly he looks up at his retreating friend, “Hey Sam!” Shouts Bucky just as Sam opens up the door, causing him to stop and give his friend a quizzical look.

“What?!”

“Fuck you!”

Sam immediately snorts, “You brought this upon yourself brother!” And with that he shuts the door leaving Bucky alone and full of regret for putting himself in danger today when you specifically told him you could handle yourself.

Why is caring for someone so hard, wonders Bucky.

——

After taking a greatly needed shower and putting on a fresh new pair of comfortable clothing for the evening, you slipped past your friends rooms and away from where Bucky may be hiding.

Until at last you made it to Natasha’s door without being caught by anyone in the hallway and stopped for a needless conversation. Soon enough you slip into Nat’s room and saunter around for a bit as you wait for her to end her shower.

“Oh shit!” Gasps Natasha as soon as she opens the door and notices you poking around her stuff, “Jesus Y/N how’d you get in here!?”

“I opened the door.”

“I thought I locked it?”

“You did.”

Natasha gives you a puzzled look as you wander over to her nightstand, nonchalantly minding your business while picking up her current novel as she watches you curiously, “So uh, how’s it going?” She asks cautiously, well aware of your irritation with Bucky earlier that day.

Flipping through the pages you answer her honestly, “I’m fine now.”

Natasha nods before turning around to search through her drawers for an outfit, “I figured that much, considering if you were still pissed you’d be throwing fireballs into the cement wall downstairs.” She quips with her usual smirk as you gently close the book and set it back in its rightful place.

“That is.....true.” You agree with a shrug, “I’m just sending a message at this point.”

“Oh really?” Laughs Natasha while slipping on a shirt, “Poor Bucky then.”

“Yeah well he was being an idiot tough guy so....it’s what I’m doing.” You add with a lopsided smug grin, “Serves him right for being reckless with no regard for his physical safety. I love him but at what cost?”

“Someone needs to tell Steve that.” Mutters Natasha as she pulls on some sweatpants.

You chuckle, “What? That someone needs to tell Steve they love him? Not a bad idea.”

“That too.” Points Natasha, “I seriously don’t know how he’s not dead yet.”

Your brows furrow in thought for a moment, “He’s built like a stone sentinel with a will greater then many, he fears nothing.” You deadpan, face stoic and serious.

“Just about.” Laughs Natasha as you begin to cackle right along with her, in the middle of your laughing fit does the door suddenly burst open to reveal...

“Hello ladies.” Chirps Tony with an award winning smile, usual old T-shirt on and hair a bit of a mess though somehow managing to keep his Stark charm.

“I really need to get an automatic lock on that thing.” Mutters Nat to no one in particular.

“What’s up Stark.” You add with an acknowledging tilt of your head, “You here to bother us or tell us something interesting?”

“Everything I say is interesting my dear sparky.” Quips Tony with a brow wiggle.

“Don’t call me that.”

“Right, anyways. Foods here.” Chides Tony as he sets a hand on his hip, “Unless you’re both too cool for movie night. More for us then, I’ll have Vision drop off our half eaten tacos.”

“We have tacos?” You ask with an intrigued raise of your brow, just wanting to confirm and make sure he’s not bluffing, you fucking love taco night.

“Yep.”

“How long have they been here?”

“Wanda and Vis just arrived so you’re the first two I found.” Oh, fuck yeah!

Turning your head to a smirking Natasha you smile back before bolting for the door, “Move Stark!” You snap before shoving him to the side and cackling as you and Natasha book it down the hall with Tony trying to keep up in the background. What can you say, Natasha always makes it a competition and its taco night. Sometimes you gotta play dirty.

Soon you and your assassin best friend who you tripped up before reaching the door finally skid into the Avengers giant lounging area. The room is relatively empty with the exception of Wanda and Vision who are seated at the large metal table near the kitchen where all the various paper bags of tacos are seated. And ripe for the taking.

Smelling absolutely delicious all tucked snug in their wrapping and filled with the most divine ingredients, you could just about die of happiness. With a beaming smile upon your face and the surprised expressions from your two friends you belt out loudly, “Tacos FUCK YEAH!” Before racing for the bags and getting tripped by Natasha.

Whipping your head up to watch her snatch a bag you growl half angrily, “You bitch.” While she happily smiles back down at you, taco in hand.

“What are you doing on the floor? Foods here.” She jokes as you quickly walk over to the counter with all the bags.

“Ha ha, you’re hilarious now give me that.”

After about ten minutes of eating and shooting the breeze with Natasha, Wanda, Vision, and Tony; you’re ears immediately catch the sounds of thundered running down the hallway and other muffled curses from two familiar individuals.

“Fun’s arrived.” Whispers Natasha with a friendly nudge to your arm as it lays on the flat surface of the table while you absentmindedly crumple up a wrapper.

Biting your lip you anticipate the impending commotion, “Fantastic.” And this whole evening could be more enjoyable if your hundred year old boyfriend would have used some common sense.

A second later the door swings open to reveal a panting Sam before Bucky slides in after him, equally as flustered, those two idiots. As they stand there collecting their breaths, Steve casually steps into the room, walking past them and over to the bags of tacos, “Aw sweet, taco night.” He confirms excitedly, hungrily eyeing up a particular bag.

Rolling your eyes, you slouch carelessly into your expensive swivel chair before turning to Wanda who’s seated across from you, “Hey, Red Riding Hood, you’re up.” She turns her attention away from Vision and nods before giving you a sly smirk and using her power to send a balled up piece of taco wrapping straight for your head.

In one calculably swift motion do you incinerate the paper material before its able to reach your face, “Y/N you’re going to set the fire detectors off.” Laughs Tony as he crumbles up a new ball.

“Eh, we could afford a renovation.”

Tony fake scoffs, “Rude.”

“Well Y/N, I thought you did great.” Applauds Wanda with a chuckle as the three other men walk around to the far end where no one is seated, “Alright Tony you next.”

You refrain from making any eye contact with Bucky who steals a few longing glances at your smiling face, instead he follows Sam and Steve to the opposite end and watches as you quickly turn another balled up paper to ash. The sounds of your laughter and the rest of the tables almost enough to drive him insane.

Yet he refrains, Bucky knows he’s essentially in time out, reason for almost getting himself killed today; and you’re not breaking anytime soon, or so he thinks.

Ignoring the three boys hungrily attacking their poor tacos away from the main groups theatrics, Vision suddenly gains your attention, “Well I suppose I should participate with this game or fear feeling left out....uh, what is the objective? Or perhaps the name?”

“They throw wrappers at me and I set them on fire before it hits myself or the ground.” You reply while crumbling up another piece, leaving Vision to process the possible deeper meaning to your brief explanation, though there really isn’t one. It’s just for fun.

“By the way I’ve been able to get her exactly once.” Brags Tony with a shit eating grin, causing you to scoff at that memory. 

“Oh fuck all the way off you flicked water into my face and then threw the paper.”

“And it was very much worth it.” He confirms as you roll your eyes at his cheating from last taco night.

The rest of your friends fill the room with snickers and some louder laughter coming from Sam down at the far end, with a raised brow you snap your head in that direction and stand, “Something funny bird boy?” You quip in a half threatening manner.

Sam’s smirk immediately drops from his face as his expression appears nonchalant, “What nooo. That was Steve.” He mutters before taking another bite out of his taco.

“Y/N that was definitely not me.”

“Uh huh.”

“Maybe it was Bucky.” Jokes Sam as you shift your fiery attention over to a fearful Bucky who quickly shakes his head before smacking Sam on the arm.

“No.” You confirm with a knowing smirk, “He doesn’t have a death wish.”

“Well neither do I please have mercy.” Pleads Sam with hands raised in defeat, “I would like to finish my taco.”

You stare down at them for a brief tension filled moment before casually shrugging, “Yeah alright.” Before sitting back down again.

——

Opening up the trash can you quickly shove down three giant paper bags from dinner with a bit of effort considering how full it is. Natasha and Vision are cleaning up in various areas nearby while Sam, Bucky, Natasha, Steve, and Tony sit in the lounging area discussing if it was necessary that Dobby was killed off in the Deathly Hallows. You know, normal things you discuss with your superpowered friends.

Well Bucky is mostly just listening and stealing glances over to you every couple of minutes, really wishing you would just walk over to him and let him show you how sorry he was with the biggest hug he could possibly muster. Probably never letting you go again, though you wouldn’t mind.

Ignoring your own longing to be cuddled up next to Bucky, you instead fight with the damn trash can to fucking shut its dumb lid already. With one hand forcefully shoving down bags, paper plates, and banana peels you start to think if volunteering for clean up was even worth it.

A blue flame suddenly erupts from your palm and makes a big black hole through the paper bags and plates, your eyes go wide in surprise as you immediately retract your hand from the trash and shut the lid just as quickly.

Taking a single step back you let out a breath before turning your head to find Bucky watching your whole ordeal go down with a drink in hand, guess he must have gotten up to get some juice and stayed for your one on one brawl with the trash can. Rolling your eyes, you wave it off, “Completely under control.” You mutter as he slowly nods.

Well this is awkward.

Shifting your gaze from Bucky to your friends and back to Bucky again, he finally speaks, “Is that why the lid has smoke coming from under it?”

“What?” You wonder in puzzlement before looking back down at the trash can to find smoke indeed rising, “Oh fuck!” Ripping the lid off you’re kindly greeted with a burst of flame and smoke. Well, shit.

“Uh, Y/N?” Asks Bucky with an uncertain chuckle, “You’re positive everything is under control?” Quips your smartass boyfriend.

With more flames rising to an almost alarming level, though not quit yet, you glance at your oblivious friends before racing for the sink, “Yes! Everything is fucking fine!” Wanda skips to the side as you snatch a cup of something from the counter by the sink.

Running back you skid in your tracks and dump the clear liquid onto the flames which causes them to rise even higher and gain the attentions of everyone sitting down and relaxing, “Why is my trash can on fire?” Asks Tony as casually as ever.

“I don’t know maybe it looks better this way?!” You sass before giving the glass a double take, “The hell? What the fuck was in this!” You shout, holding up the glass while fire burns in the trash from behind you.

“Oh that had some Quinjet fuel in it, why do you ask?” Replies Tony, he’s gotta be fucking with you.

Squinting at him in bewilderment, you shake the empty glass in frustration, “Why the fuck would there be a random glass of fuel sitting in a clear unlabeled glass on the fucking sink of all places!”

“What did you think it was?”

“Oh I don’t know!? Water?!” You snap causing the fire to roar even higher at your outburst.

Looking almost like a demon princess standing there with flames rising from behind you, your fists ball up with blue flame, something that you don’t even realize is happening as you give Tony a (what the fuck are you actually stupid) face.

Sensing your obvious irritation and rising anger, Bucky comes to the rescue with a whole bowl full of actual water and promptly dumbs it onto the flames which causes the unless materials to sizzle and whine. Soon the oranges and reds are gone, leaving the contents turned to ash and nothing more then wet soot.

Distinguishing your own flames, you hang your head low, revealing a tired heavy sigh as you mumble, “Shit.” Suddenly you feel admittedly quit drained and annoyed from the events of the day, even if they weren’t all bad.

Your friends keep silent for a moment before Steve quickly stands, “Movie night anyone?” Gaining the attention of everyone in an instant; you bless the blonde for his intuitive ways of helping you out in the smallest of moments. He truly is a great friend.

“Yeah I could watch something.” Adds Sam with a shrug, “I’m thinking Deathly Hallows Part 2.”

“Yeah it’s pretty good I’ll join.”

“Me too.”

“Yeah I’m in.”

Everyone get up and begins walking for the door as you stay standing in your spot near the wet and ash covered metal trash can, everyone exiting for the home theater except for Bucky who’s back is to you while he tells Sam you’ll be there in a minute.

Folding your arms, you suddenly feel like it’s the first time you and Bucky have ever talked one on one with each other, you’re typically a pretty damn confident and fiery person to begin with, it’s just. Being mad at your favorite human in the whole entire world and then embarrassing yourself with accidentally setting the trash can on fire can take its toll.

Also not to mention the mission many hours ago was admittedly hectic and stress inducing and then, Bucky....perhaps a moment to calm down would have been smart if taken earlier. God your life moves to damn fast.

“You are so intense sometimes.”

Breaking out of your self reflective trance, your eyes quickly dart up to see Bucky who’s giving you a soft smile, “If you wanted my attention you could have just asked.”

“Very funny.” You scoff, “I was actually too busy being mad at you.”

“Ah, right.” Nods Bucky as he mirrors your defensive positioning, deciding to cross his arms and make a pouty face like yourself, “So I guess we’ll just stay here and brood then?”

“I’m trying to make a point.” You mutter, you’re not gonna crack, you’re not gonna do it.

“I’m trying to get my girlfriend to watch a movie with me.” Admits Bucky with an affectionate head tilt as you frown, “I know they’re not going to wait for us so....uh....okay let me start over.....I’m sorry for being reckless and almost dying. And I mean it too, with all of my heart. I love you Y/N.”

Although you’d like to throw his dumb reckless ass some sass and strut away leaving him guessing and begging for more, you just can’t find it in you at this point. He looks at you with those big beautiful blue eyes full of love and adoration for you and only you, how could you possibly resist them?

You know with every ounce of your soul that he means every single word, and you also know that he’s missed you since the second you yelled at him and slammed the facility door, leaving him alone and regretting his past decisions that could have potentially ended him then and there.

“Sometimes James, sometimes.” You mutter, shaking your head in disapproval before a small smirk pulls at your lips and in that moment he knows you’re his, “Come here.”

Heeding to your wonderful command that he’s been waiting to hear all day, he swiftly makes the short distance to gather your smaller body into a giant Bucky bear hug, his strong arms wrap protectively around your back as his head falls into the side of your neck as he quickly steals a small kiss.

You pull him in even tighter and fully enjoy the sensation of himself flush against you, metal arm squeezing your rip cage and long dark hair that falls into your eyes; god you love him so much.

Giving you one last little squeeze of affection, Bucky slowly pulls away and presses his head against yours, “I gotta be honest, I have no idea what this movie is about.” Reveals Bucky as he continues to holds you close.

Chuckling you press a kiss to his lips, “I’ll tell you what’s happening. Let’s go before we miss anything else.”

Nodding, he tilts your head up to press a sweet kiss to your lips one last time before letting you go, so that the two of you can begin walking for the door. Opening up the metal and glass door for you like the gentleman that he is, Bucky quickly jogs over to your side.

“So Sam told me these guys are wizards or something? Like they can teleport and fly I think?” States Bucky in question while walking in step with you.

Looking over at him you smile at how cute he’s being right now, giving him an agreeable nod, “Yeah they can do cool stuff like change form and set things on fire.”

Bucky suddenly starts laughing much to your confusion, “Y/N does that make you a wizard?”

Shoving him to the side you snort as he keeps laughing, “Shut up.” You mutter humorously as he stumbles from your friendly push.

Making quick steps to catch up with you, Bucky pulls you into his side, “Forgive me I didn’t mean it...” Snickers your adorable idiot, “I bet you’d be the best wizard, pointy hat and all.”

Shaking your head you can’t help the smirk that tugs against your better wishes, “I’m gonna set you on fire.” You jokingly threaten him with as he affectionately squeezes your side, causing you to be pressed even closer against him.

“Wizard.” Muses Bucky as he plants a kiss to your cheek as you try and push him away.

“Bucky, shut the fuck up.”

“But, I love you.”

[thr-333]

Drastic Measures- Part 12

@daminette-december2019-2020

~Soul Mate~

I would like to point out that in my plan for this chapter i wrote ‘magic beam pew pew’ I take my work very seriously.

Ao3

First < Previous > Next

-----------------

“Were you like this for me?” Adrien pokes her with his foot.

“Worse believe it or not,” Marinette stares dreamily at the snowglobe, as she had been for the last hour.

“Terrifying," Adrien leans over her, teasing her, "You go it baaadd~”

“Adrien!” She pushes him away, blush taking over her face, “Plagg says something about cheese, not boys!”

“There’s an Akuma,” Plagg says deadpan, not what she was looking for but it will do.

“Saved by the moth,” Adrien jokes, opening the window.

“And they’re about to be saved by the bug,”

 ---

 “I hate love Akuma,” Ladybug laments at the man heartbroken and sobbing, making it everyone else's problem.

“At least this one isn’t brainwashing anyone, maybe we should let it run around for a bit, let some people find their other half?” Ladybug sends Chat a death glare, “... orrr we could do our job and you stop glaring at me like that, that works too,”

“Ladybug,” Batman lands behind her, Ladybug can just feel her irritation rise.

“If you say what I think you’re going to say I am not helping,” She stares him down, completely serious. She. Is. Done.

“You’re a distraction, you need to leave-” That. Is. It.

“Chat make some popcorn we’ve got a show to watch,” Ladybug turns around, plopping herself on the edge of the building.

“Just couldn't help yourself could you?” Chat Noir asks Batman before joining her.

“You-”

“I’ll help when you apologize,” Ladybug cuts him off. Batman glares down at them for a few minutes before leaving to help the chaos below.

“Sooo, soul mates? do those actually exist?” Chat asks, the Akuma apparently trying to find their's as whoever they hit would have a line leading them to their soulmate. Meaning everyone hit was freaking out.

“Master Fu said they did, but I don’t think it's necessarily a romantic connection,” Below people with their act together are chasing after the lines while the Akuma wails they haven't found theirs yet.

“No?” The Akuma isn’t attacking anyone per se, just throwing the Bat pack back when they get too close.

“He said a soul mate was like a balance someone who is your opposite but also complementary,” Ladybug explains, “You balance each other out, strengthening each other,”

“Like us?” Chat grins, in the past it would have been an opportunity to flirt not anymore.

“Ideally, but Master Fu told me we weren't soulmates, that the balance was off, that's probably why this has been so difficult,” They might have been able to defeat Hawkmoth by now if they were.

“We still get along,” Chat looks wounded, Ladybug snapping back from her thoughts.

“Of course we do,” She quickly redeems, “Honestly I can’t picture a better partner,”

“Not even-”

“Finish that thought and I’ll throw you right off the roof,” Marinette glares knowing exactly where that's going.

“Fine, fine,” Chat surrenders, focusing again on the chaos below, “So what happens if you don’t find your soul mate?”

“Nothing usually, lots of people don't, as long as they're out there somewhere in the universe you’re at balance,” Ladybug still feels bad for the careless implication earlier, “Lucky Charm,”

“If they’re not?” Chat asks catching the Lucky Charm, a bucket of popcorn just their luck.

“If they’re gone they lose that balance, people can get a little unstable, traits becoming more extreme,” Ladybug munches on the popcorn with chat, “For a lot of people it’s not noticeable besides a mood swing but if you had a strong connection then the effects can be more drastic,”

“Think that happened Hawkmoth?” He says idly watching as a couple gets hit and their lines don't lead to each other.

“Maybe,” She hums as they start yelling at each other for cheating.

“Egh, Hawkmoth in a relationship? imagine if he had a child?” They both make a face, “They’d probably be a dick,”

“What?” Nightwing calls, trying to break up the fighting couple.

“Huh?” 

“Nevermind!” Nightwing says quickly, getting hit over the head with a purse.

“Again, soulmates aren't inherently romantic,” Should probably tell the couple down there that, “But having someone that balances you perfectly can lead to romance,”

“Or a killer friendship,” Robin runs in to help break up the fight. It’s getting busy people apparently learning about the Akuma's power and now the Bats are mainly busy with crowd control.

“We don’t need to be soul mates to have that,” Ladybug smiles, stealing the popcorn.

“Pound it,” They say at the same time, falling into comfortable silence at the show below.

“Think we should help?” Chat asks eventually the streets crowded, the bats fruitlessly trying to keep people away from the dangerous Akuma.

“Have I gotten an apology?” Ladybug asks, feeling some satisfaction as a lady slaps Batman. Alright, a lot of satisfaction.

“Robin’s struggling,” And he really was trying to drag a hysterical teen away from the Akuma.

“Eh, he tried to stab me, call this payback,” And it looked like the teen wanted to stab him.

“Damn try to stab you find out who your soulmate is?” Chat whistles as the Akuma tries to hit Robin, “You drive a tough ship Milady,”

“Seriously Chat, edge of the building, can push you right off,”

“But you wo- AH!” 

“Oh, but I will,”

She swings her legs. Chat catches himself as she knew he would and joins her back on the rooftop. Ladybug munches on the popcorn watching as Robin tries to avoid the beam while keeping people back.

It’s fun until it has consequences.

Robin gets hit, which would be all well and good if the line appearing wasn't connected directly to her. Robin looks up the line, finding a frozen Ladybug looking below.

“... Well Milady,” Chat gives an awkward thumbs up, “Good for you,”

 ---

 “He might not be your real soulmate,” Adrien pats her back, Marinette's head buried into the pillows, “It was an Akuma's magic,”

“An Akuma is from miraculous magic,” Marinette complains, muffled into the pillows, “If there's one thing in the universe that can recognize soul mates it’s miraculous,”

“Alright let's calm down,” Adrien pushes her over so she is staring up at the ceiling, “You said soul mates don't have to be romantic, so really this doesn't change anything,”

“But Robin?” Marinette sits up cringing.

“Do you really hate him that much?” Adrien asks genuinely, Marinette flops back onto the bed.

“Ugh, no, I don’t hate him at all, mad at him sure, generally annoyed yes, but not hate,” She takes the snowglobe Damian brought her, looking at it sadly, “I just… can’t see why he is,”

“Could have been worse,” Adrien's tone turns lighter, obviously he’s about to try and cheer her up, keyword try, “What if your soul mate was Lila- AH!”

“You need to stop standing on ledges when you annoy me,” Marinette looks at him dispassionately as Adrien is sprawled over the floor.

 ---

 She’s my soul mate! Ladybug is my soul mate

A cautious skeptical part of his mind warns that might not be right. It was a villain's magic, they could have been trying to manipulate them, it may be random or not accurate. Still, all of that depended on soul mates actually existing in the first place. But none of it mattered as Damian was practically giddy at the revelation.

He flops back on his bed staring dreamily at the ceiling. And yet still something nags at him. Not caution over being lied to or manipulated. It’s a feeling of loss. And he can’t figure out where it’s coming from.

Damian sighs in annoyance turning over to face his desk. He might as well get some work done. He freezes. Draped on the chair is the sweater Marinette made him. The feeling claws uncomfortably at his chest, worsening until he is forced to turn away.

Ladybug is my soul mate

 ---

 “Hey does anyone know why Bruce is having a heart attack,” Jason walks into the cave, throwing his helmet to the side, “And follow up, who caused it? I’d like to personally thank them,”

“Jason!” Dick chides, still hovering around a catatonic Bruce.

“It was me? I wasn't even in town,” Jason whistles, “I have to pat  myself on the back for that one usually it takes a lot more effort,”

“It’s not you, it’s Damian,” Dick rolls his eyes, leaving the unresponsive Batman.

“What did demon spawn do?”

“He’s going to marry Ladybug!” Dick whisper shouts, excitement practically radiating off him.

“... how long was I gone for?” Jason asks, “I was gone for three days, did Gotham get stuck in some time paradox no one bothered to mention?”

Did the demon spawn really propose? Honestly, it wouldn't have been the craziest thing their family has done, actually, it would be borderline sane in comparison.

---------

No taglist :P

[inkytheyiga]

I fucking demand you give us Rhoam and Huni fucking. Like, at the goddamn dinner table, fuck the fact that the champions are eating with them-i want my slutty, old degenerate

1) Wow. Rude.

2) Of course ❤️

Huni was always demanding things from Rhoam. Whether it be more money, a cute outfit, a new toy, sex, more food, and so on and so forth. However, this time he demanded something entirely different.

That’s how Rhoam ended up at the head of the grand dinner table in the dining hall of the castle, with the four champions, plus Kohga and Sooga, for a cute little get together.

Huni had initially only wanted to invite Daruk over to the castle, but the king insisted that all of the champions attend. Then Mipha roped Kohga into joining, and of course Sooga had to accompany his master as well.

As the group waited for the main course to be served, they delved into idle chatter. Except for Rhoam and Huni.

Huni was too busy ogling the goron champion, Daruk. The man was built…well…like a boulder, and he loved that. He had also heard from a little birdie that gorons had quite sizable cocks. And he really wanted to see for himself. That much was obvious from the look on his face. He was giving the bumbling pile of pebbles bedroom eyes. Right in front of the king of Hyrule!

Safe to say, Rhoam was the jealous type. Especially when it came to Huni. Something about seeing the young man be so flirty with others…it stirred something in him. He wasn’t sure if it was pure jealousy, or the crude desire to fuck Huni so that everyone could see, but that didn’t matter. He was the king. He got what he wanted.

So while everyone else seemed thoroughly distracted, Rhoam slipped his hand beneath the table and gave Huni’s thigh a firm squeeze. (The boy had insisted on sitting next to him at the head of the table. Damn brat.)

The Gerudo let out a small gasp before looking at the large man who sat beside him.

“Rhoam you dog~ We can’t get frisky now! We have company~” The tone in his voice was as flirty as always. Ugh. Of course.

“Quite a bold thing for you to say, considering you have been eyeing one of our guests since the moment he arrived.” Rhoam snapped back, struggling to keep his voice at a whisper.

“Oh come on Daddy, let me have a little fun~” Huni gave a cheeky wink before turning back towards the rest of the guests and sliding into conversation. With Daruk of all people.

Rhoam grumbled and took a sip from his chalice, trying his best to soothe the anger building up inside of him. He just couldn’t stand the way Huni looked at the champion. Those beautiful topaz eyes, fixated on a man who wasn’t worthy of their gaze. Huni belonged to him. Not to Daruk.

He quickly became consumed by his thoughts of jealousy. Oh the things he would do to Huni if the champions weren’t there. Or perhaps he could let them watch. Make sure they knew that the young man was his property, and no one else’s. No, no, that was just his horny brain talking. He could never commit such an act in front of others.

He wasn’t sure how much time had passed before suddenly being snapped back into reality from Kohga asking him a question. He didn’t hear what exactly it was, but he knew it was directed at him.

“My apologies, I did not quite catch that, could you repeat it?”

Kohga groaned and most likely rolled his eyes before repeating his question.

“We were just talking about relationships, y’know, considering half of us are in one? Anyways- I was just wondering- how the hell are you such a damn prude when it comes to this shit?? I mean- you’re with the sluttiest Gerudo in existence! No offense, Huni.”

“None taken,” He chimed in “I take pride in my sluttiness.”

Rhoam wanted to strangle the both of them for saying such things at the dinner table. How crude could they possibly get? But he still had to show good manners and respond, as much as it pained him to humor such a ridiculous question.

“I was raised upon traditional beliefs. Many of the things you youth do today were considered utterly taboo during my childhood.” He took a sip from his chalice of wine. “My parents didn’t even hold hands before marriage.”

Looks of shock we’re plastered around the faces of the guests, which he should’ve expected, in all honesty. But before a sane person could add their thoughts, Huni just had to speak up.

“That explains why you ended up as such a sexually repressed manwhore.”

The words came out of his mouth so casually. As if there was absolutely nothing wrong with any of it.

Kohga immediately burst out in laughter, pounding his fist against the table as he damn near snorted. “OHH!! OH THATS RICH!!”

Huni wasn’t the only one at the table who was aware of Rhoam’s sex life.

Rhoam grumbled and shot Huni a glare. “Don’t you be right about me, you whore.” He tried keeping his voice down to a whisper, but his anger and embarrassment made that a bit difficult.

Huni simply rolled his eyes as he began twirling a strand of hair around a perfectly manicured finger. “At least I’m open about my whorishness , unlike you! And I’m not some disgusting masochistic pig that likes being stepped on!”

At this point, everyone else at the table was dead silent, aside from Kohga who was still snickering. Dinner and a show! How wonderful!

Rhoam’s face was red in anger and embarrassment. “I’m a pig- have you SEEN your table manners?! We might as well replace the plates with pig troughs!”

“Oh PLEASE! At least I know how to use my mouth properly! I can have you cumming down my throat in seconds!” Huni scoffed in offense. “Meanwhile, I had to train you like a dog on how to eat pussy!”

Everyone was gawking at the couple, eyes wide in pure shock. None of them had ever seen someone speak to the king like that. And while most found it utterly appalling, Kohga of course found it hilarious.

“Sooga get me another drink- this is fucking GOLD!”

“This is painful to sit through.”

“No this is amazing. I’m telling the entire clan once we get back.”

The idea of that many people hearing about the way Huni spoke to him finally made Rhoam reach his breaking point.

The king slammed his hands down on the table as he stood up before shoving his and Huni’s plates, cutlery, and drinks off the table, with each item either shattering or clattering upon hitting the floor.

“Hey what do you think you’re doing you jacka-“

Huni was cut off by Rhoam suddenly grabbing him, pinning his back against the table, and kissing him passionately. The Gerudo’s arms and legs quickly snaked their way around Rhoam’s shoulders and torso.

Their make-out was loud and sloppy and full of passion. Everyone hated it, but they were all in too much shock to actually do something about it. And so it escalated.

Rhoam broke apart from their kiss, only to begin covering Huni’s neck in love bites. Meanwhile, one of his hands moved down to begin rubbing Huni’s pussy through his shorts. The damn whore was already soaking through the fabric. Rhoam hated how he loved it. Hated how he loved the way Huni moaned and tried humping his hand. Hated how he loved Huni himself.

No, no, that was just the horny talking. Rhoam didn’t ACTUALLY love Huni. He just needed to bust a nut.

So with his other hand, he began fumbling with his belt, and that’s when the guests finally decided to step in.

“YOUR HIGHNESS! WE ARE AT THE DINNER TABLE! STOP THIS ASININE BEHAVIOR BEFORE WE ALL LOSE OUR APPETITES!”

“YOUR MAJESTY PLEASE! NOT IN FRONT OF US!”

“RHOAM! HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN THAT THERE ARE OTHERS PRESENT?!”

After hearing all the shouting, Rhoam was quickly snapped back to reality. He tore himself away from Huni, looking like he was about to die from embarrassment.

“My apologies….We will…We will be right back..”

He grabbed Huni by the wrist and quickly stormed out of the dining hall, slamming the door behind him.

“So…..Anyone wanna see the pictures I got?”

“Master Kohga, why?”

“Why not?”

————

Just outside the dining hall, Rhoam had Huni pinned against the wall, grinding his still erect cock against him

“You…You little brat….This is all your fault…If you hadn’t opened your mouth…None of this would-“

“Oh for the love of- just shut up and FUCK ME ALREADY!!”

Despite his anger, Rhoam had no objections. So after hastily shoving down both of their pants, he thrust into Huni, not even bothering to be gentle with him.

Huni let out a harsh cry and wrapped his arms around Rhoam’s neck. “Fuck!! Daddy your cock feels so good in my whore pussy!!”

Dammit. That stupid nickname again. He hated it. But he couldn’t deny that it made his cock throb.

“Keep calling me that.” He muttered as he began kissing up and down the Gerudo’s neck, just like before, whilst thrusting into him.

Huni tightened his grip on Rhoam and nodded. “Yes- Yes Daddy- Fuck…Fuck I’m such a whore….I was so fucking ready for you to fuck me in front of everyone….Show them all that I’m yours….That this is the best pussy you’ve ever gotten….FUCK-!!”

Huni suddenly cried out as Rhoam bit his neck and came deep inside his pussy. All that dirty talk really gave him no chance of lasting long.

After coming down from his brief high, the king pulled out and used Huni’s thighs to wipe off any residual cum from his cock, then pulled his pants back up and tucked himself away.

“Now pull your shorts back up. You do not deserve to orgasm after that little stunt you pulled in there. So now you will sit there, full of my semen, and behave like a good little whore. Am I clear?”

“Y-Yes sir…”

[heroprose]

aromatic;

a/n. forewarning for the usual vampiric shenanigans.

ship. hitoshi shinou x reader

summary. contemporary vampire au. (+ slight office au)

//

hitoshi shinsou despises you, you’re certain of this. 

what you’re not quite sure of is where all the animosity stemmed from, especially since he seemed to conduct himself well enough with everyone else. 

out of all your fellow colleagues, he treated you with the most transparent curtness, from promptly exiting whenever you entered the breakroom for a refreshment, to visibly retching the one time you tried to take an empty seat next to him during a conference (you’ll never forgive him for that slight).

it was really starting to grate on you. you were going to have to confront him about this yourself.

besides, you’ve no longer a choice in the matter: this unspoken tension had begun to affect the workplace, with people sometimes looking to and fro between you and him, confused to high hell why he always kept himself a good several meters away from you if he could-- not that you were complaining. social distancing can be quite mutually beneficial, after all.

and it wasn’t an issue you’d like to bring up with human resources either: that seemed a little too petty, even if he was literally gagging at your presence. 

you did try to ameliorate the work relationship-- really, you did. but there’s only so many times you can crack a joke and be left hanging in that awkward silence before you stop altogether. you once thought it’d been something you said in poor taste that made him abhor you so, but unless he had a seething hatred for mild puns, that didn’t seem right. 

and so what that you were a newer addition to the team-- you’d entertained the idea that maybe he had a thing against strangers, but hell, it’s been months and even interns get more conversation out of him than you.

although given his visceral reactions, you’re inclined to think it’s something about how you smell... but that’s just insane. you took your daily showers and used reasonable amounts of detergent in your laundry; and if you can take the pungency of axe body spray and the zestiness of dior’s sauvage on every man in the building, then he should be able to tolerate your own signature scent, which wasn’t even that bad... was it? 

no one else complained about it though. and you’ve even asked around too, so you know you’re not wearing absolute funk. it’s an unfathomable situation.

today, however, you forewent the perfume. if it really was the fragrance, then this should leave no opening. you’ve tucked the bottle in your workbag instead, in case you needed it like a piece of evidence for his rude behavior, ace attorney style.

you waited until lunch break, where most of the other colleagues would leave the building for nearby restaurants or go to the cafeteria, before approaching him. it was best this way, lest it got weird; at least only few people would witness it. 

hitoshi was currently invested in whatever it was on his computer, and if you were correct in his observations, he would pull out his own homemade meal shortly enough to eat at his desk. some days, he didn’t eat at all, which was surely unhealthy but you were hardly in the position to scold him considering your own bad habits. plus you didn’t want him to hate you even deeper. 

you got to observe this routine over a good number of weeks and it was truly no easy feat, with his desk set in the far corner of the workplace far from the wall-length windows and him being constantly out and about on his own assignments.

with your workbag in one hand, you walk up to him with as much nonchalance as you could muster. “hey! not going down to the cafe today?” it’s rhetorical: you knew he wasn’t.

he hardly responds, eyes flickering up at you briefly and giving a greeting nod before returning to his work. “mm.”

you round the corner of the desk so that you stand beside him. leaning down slightly to squint at the screen, you deliberately put yourself in his space. “oh wow, the deadline’s so far away but you’re already working on this part?”

he began to open his mouth, only to clap a hand over it with remarkable speed. and he coughs, goodness, with shoulders jumping.

“oh my god,” you can’t help but say as you withdraw. could he smell it even from your bag? you weren’t even sure if it was the perfume or just you anymore. “okay, i’ll cut to the chase. can we talk? alone?”

you’d think he would think it over, at the very least, to give a semblance of polite reflection. “no,” is his immediate reply, spoken forcefully, so forcefully that a lone passing colleague even gives you two a glance. 

“i was, uh, just leaving,” they say. “want anything?”

“i’m good, thanks,” you reply, bidding them farewell with a breezy smile before refocusing on hitoshi. he has already turned away from you, eyes blazing at the computer screen.

without another word, you reach over, placing a hand over his, and drag his mouse to click out of his report.

“what do you think you’re doing?” hitoshi demands, jerking away from your touch. and he’s angry now, genuinely irritated: you can see it in the way his jaw tightens. too bad you’ve been annoyed ever since you’ve been moved to this department.

“it was google docs, relax. your work is saved,” you soothe over. “now come with me. i just want to talk to you for five minutes, tops. please.”

he’s deeply conflicted for a heartbeat, but finally relents. “five minutes,” he echoes. you give him the space to stand up, clutching your workbag strap tightly in your fist. if he knew what this was about, he gave no mention as he walked openhanded behind you.

hastily, you lead him to the breakroom. with its doorless entrance, you assumed that the ventilation there would be moderately good, if it got too stuffy for him. then again, you wouldn’t of minded if he suffocated a bit either. admittedly, the entire floor was probably empty save for you two, so this dialogue could’ve been held out in the open but it didn’t hurt to have that extra layer of seclusion. 

“i already know,” you say into the quietude, leaning against the counter. behind you, the coffee machine beeped every so often. someone should get that fixed. you cross your arms and look at him carefully. the vents are tinny above you two, warm air rushing out noisily.

“you-- what?” his dark eyes widen ever so slightly, and for once, his expression isn’t quite so tense with you. “what do you know?” he must’ve not expected you to be so direct. he takes his hand out of his pocket.

“you know what i’m talking about. why you treat me like, i don’t know, the plague?”

“i don’t do that.”

“you nearly threw up when you saw me.”

hitoshi stays silent. ha, gotcha! “i only coughed,” he relents eventually.

“whatever. and i know it’s not me and that it’s really all you because guess what? no one else has this problem. and i’m thinking you don’t want me to air out your business to everyone else because that would be...” weird, for one, but you didn’t want to ruin your own case. “doesn’t matter; in any case, there’s no reason to be rude over this.”

“alright. so you know. i avoid you because of your scent.” his voice is dangerously calm. “what are you going to do about me, then?”

“about you?” you repeat with a scoff, “oh, so i should report you? what would i even say? HR would laugh at me.”

he smirks, chin jutting out. “right.”

“so now i only have one question. wait, make that two.”

“go on.”

“how should we fix this? because obviously i don’t want our little dance to start affecting our work ethic. you can’t wave me away forever. it’s how i smell, right? do you have a recommended detergent or deodorant, or something?” you ignore the fact that you’ve technically asked three questions.

“none of that covers it,” he mutters and your jaw drops. “masks don’t help either.”

“no way. i smell that b-- you know what... moving on. we’ve got to compromise somewhere though. but not my perfume.” your hands reflexively ball up. there’s no camera, so if you did something unsavory, there equally wouldn’t be any real witnesses...

“your perfume,” he repeats, seemingly dissatisfied. 

“yeah, no way. that’s my signature scent. go wear nose plugs or something, if it’s that bad. and i can’t believe you say scent and not body odor, like just call it what it is! damn.” 

the coffee machine lets out its intermittent beeps. hitoshi just stares at you, mystified. then, he breaks into a snort, like he’s the one who can’t believe he’s having this discussion. “i understand. in that case, i see no solution.” whilst bringing a hand to the back of his neck, he starts to move, intent on passing you to exit the room.

you let out a frustrated noise. “you leave me no choice, hitoshi.”

intending on presently the bottle to him proudly, perhaps even spritzing him once for good measure, you jam your hand into your workbag to fish your perfume out. you grab onto the rectangular shaped glass, and pull it out with great gusto.

and it goes terribly. 

to your horror, the bottle slips like butter between your fingers and sails, tumbling down to the floor right in front of you with a heartrending crash, glass splintering like ice. the beautiful blue lid goes spinning across the tiles, and like that, the whole room now blooms a gorgeous citrus, white floral scent. “oh nooooooo! shit!”

no longer minding him, you go to pick up the shards, bending down at the knees with a sigh. gingerly, you begin to clean up.

“hey, be careful. i’ll get a dustpan,” you hear him say and it’s one of the nicest things he’s ever said to you, but in your melancholy, you shake your head solemnly.

“no, no, i’ve got this. i’m just so-- OWW?” you wail without warning. you drop the wet shard you were grasping, still slick with liquid. “ugh, never mind. get the dustpan.” you bring yourself up on your feet again.

using your shoe, you kick the shards into a more cohesive, but wet pile. the clattering of the glass causes you some emotional pain. “terrific,” you mutter, watching blood bead up at across two of your fingertips. “well, at least i won’t be wearing that anymore. right, hitoshi?” you ask sarcastically. shaking your hand to rid it of perfume residue, you end up just flecking your blood droplets all over the floor. you glance up when you’re met with silence. “hitoshi?”

“nnngh...” a low, deep groan escapes his throat, and immediately he turns his cheek and takes several stumbling steps away. he grits his teeth, the vein in his neck growing more prominent like it’s physically paining him to pull apart from you. “you’ve got to be fucking kidding me...”

“you okay?” you close in on him. it felt almost backwards to ask such a query, seeing as you were the one bleeding. “maybe you should sit d--”

“get away from me,” he all but spits out, eyes squeezed shut. “you set this up, huh? figures.” stray hairs were falling into his face as he presses a hand against his temple and bit back another groan. “i was doing just fine before... so why... nngh.”

you purse your lips. “hey! what do you have against dolce & gabbana’s light blue eau de toilette? it’s a perfectly respectable, fresh, work-friendly fragrance! it was, at least!” you wanted to shout. but that didn’t happen, as your concern and confusion won over your sense of petulance. “set what up?” you ask, bewildered.

on closer inspection, he was not, in fact, okay at all. 

for a second, you thought he was having an allergic reaction. that would certainly explain his avoidance of your body, and perhaps why even a deep black had replaced the cool purple in his irises when his eyes snap open to glare. his pupils were blown out despite the bright tube lighting overhead, and his mouth parts wide.

yet an allergy did not explain everything. as opposed to weak, however, hitoshi suddenly looked frightening. 

because, instead, what came out of your mouth was a strangled, “uh, what the-- are those fangs?” 

and indeed they were, confirmed as they descended upon your skin before you  could even blink. at the very least, he had the decency to pant out a small but distinctively unapologetic “sorry” before his lips pressed around your bleeding fingers, tongue hot against the stinging cuts. 

you hope fervently your coworkers take their leisure at lunch.

[toorumochi]

KaruShuu OTP Questions

Ah- I created ehhh 4?? I suppose KaruShuu head-canons posts today but do I regret it? Absolutely not, I loved it. So here you go, have another one, don't be shy, read it.

Also, please keep in mind that these head-canons are completely made up by me in a way of that it's just how I would see it sksksk also here, KaruShuu would be probably adults?? Also married??

Anyways, enjoy~ 🌸

Who is the most affectionate? Sinceee they got married, I'm sure the longer into the relationship, the more they have opened up to each other? Karma would be the type to wake up first in the morning and kiss Shuu good morning, but since Shuu is an early bird, he would wake up before Karma and make breakfast for him. Thats how he shows affection ❤️🧡

Most common argument? Sad to think that they NeEd to argue 🙄💅 but oh well- I thinkkk they would argue over super silly things. For example what to watch (If you have read my previous head canons, you will know what I mean by 'Shrek Marathons'):

"Let's watch something"

"Sure, what do you have in mind?''

Karma would just grin over to Shuu and Shuus eyes would widen, "Hell no"

"Absolutely ye-"

"Karma don't you dAR-"

They ended up watching (again for the 12 time this week) Shrek.

Who apologizes first? Karma apologies fly out of his mouth faster than they stop arguing. Karma would rather apologize than not let them talk for the next few hours.

Favorite (non-sexual) activity to do together? They enjoy getting massage! Ifff KaruShuu was too lazy to go out to get a professional massage for a few hours, they would do it to each other. (It usually ends with them making out later on but I'll delete that part)

Who is most likely to carry the other? Karma would carry Shuu ❤️😩 Ugh bridal style to embarrass him 💀💅

Nicknames?

For Karma, by Shuu: Tamponhead (I used this one in my fanfic and I will forever love it), Moron, Karma. Tbh, I don't think neither like these pet-names or nicknames since that think they are 'cringy'.

Tho, Karma has quite a few: Shuu (Main, he doesn't use 'Gakushuu' but when he does, Shuu melts lol), Pumpkin, Orange, pumpkin pie, Strawberry shortcake (bc he loves strawberries so why not call Shuu one 😌🤚🏻), Sugar cube (Idk I think it's cute, tho I don't know if that's even a nickname- 💀💀)

Also a note: They would definitely not use 'baby', 'babe', 'honey' bc- noooo 😩💀

Who proposes? Karma 💅

Who sings along with the radio? Karma would sing along but he is horrible at singing and Shuu makes him KNOW it by him singing and Karma shuts up but finds it hilarious at the same time.

Who worries most? Both do, depending on the situation. Shuu would be worried about stuff like paying taxes or things like that, meanwhile Karma is worried for Shuus health, if he is eating enough as well as getting enough sleep every night. Shuu is a hardworking bee after all ✨

Who always wants to take selfies with the other? Karma wants to, for example they are traveling somewhere for vacation and Karma wants to take as many pics as possible with his husband so he can later on put them into an album ❤️😩 (KaruShuu as a married couple >>>>)

Who likes to playfully tease the other? Ohhh~ Karma teases Shuu all the time, but there are times where Shuu would feel playful so he would tease back

Who has the weirdest taste in their music? Karma I'm begging you- his music taste changes every week and road trips are a disaster for Shuu

Who remembers what the other one always orders at a restaurant? Karma remembers because Shuu is always ordering the same things since he is minimalistic lol but Karma is a living chaos when it comes to food so Shuu can't remember it all.

Who is embarrassed to take their clothes off in front of the other? Lmao no matter for how long they are already together, no matter if they are married, no matter how many times they had done it, Shuu would be the one to be embarrassed about it every time.

Who tops? ...Okay so here, personally as someone who writes Fanfics, Karma tops. Always. I just- I just can't imagine Shuu as a top?? my friends gave me some really valid reasons for Shuu to be a top but I just can't see it 😩

Who initiates kisses? Both I guess? But mostly Karma

Who reaches for the other's hand first? Oooo here an example! If they are driving in the car, and Karmas hand is free, Shuu usually reaches for it but as soon as Karma needs it to drive, he has to let go. Or if they are in the cinema - Shuu would definitely hold onto Karmas hand the whole time - as comfort, since they usually watch Horror movies together so yea 😌

Who kisses hardest? Who is most ticklish? Both is Karma, but when it comes to tickling, even tho Karma is more ticklish, he is also stronger than Shuu so he can easily pin him down and tickle him, just for the sake to see Shuu giggle which kills him bc God damnit isn't he adorable?

Who brings an animal they found home? Lol depends on the animal. I would say Karma is a cat person and Shuu is a dog person b u t Shuu is allergic to cats so they can't have cats. But I think if Karma would be the one to bring an animal home, it would be a dog.

Who holds the umbrella for the other when it's raining? Karma's shoe laces often get untangled, so when Karma bends to tie them, Shuu stands over him with an umbrella to keep the rain from pouring on him.

Who tries to playfully embarrass the other in public? Karma 😭

Who kills the scary bugs? Oh lemme tell you about this one:

Shuu HATES bugs, since he always had the feeling of his father having a bunch of centipedes around himself whenever he acted manipulative and so on so he hates them. So one time when Shuu was taking a shower, and Karma was in the kitchen, Shuu suddenly screeched so Karma went to check on him. He walked onto a Shuu, covering himself with a towel and looking absolutely T E R R I F I E D at the ceiling, stuttering. Karma was hella confused so he looked up and oop here we go, a spider. Karma obv took the spider off the ceiling to free it, but first he had to tease and scare his husband a little by walking towards the shower stall, "Shuu look~ He wants to be friends with you~", the way Shuu screamed at this made almost all of the windows in the apartment break.

Who asks the weird questions at random in the middle of the night? Karma does that on a daily basis, but when Shuu is a little bit drunk, he would ask weird questions to which Karma never has an answer but he jokes around.

Who hogs the blankets? Karma hogs them and Shuu ends up having a cold the next morning 😭

Who wakes up first? Shuu is an early bird, but Karma wakes up first for work.

Who wants to stay in bed just a bit longer? On weekends, they both stay in bed a bit longer to cuddle ❤️💕

Who always makes coffee for the other each morning? Karma makes coffee for Shuu before he leaves for work 🥰

Who cries during certain films or when reading sad books? Lmao Karma cries during Shrek every time the scene comes up where Shrek had an argument with Donkey 😔

Who gets scared during horror films? Shuu 😩😩 He would (as said before) take Karmas hand for comfort

Who tells their friends/family about the relationship first? Lmao none since GakuHOE is well, a hoe so they won't trust him b u t I have the feeling of Karmas mom being actually super supportive?? But they wouldn't tell her, she would just get the hint and then when she receives the wedding invite she goes "oh-".

What do their friends/family think of the relationship? Rio was shipping this since the beginning of middle school aight, she loves it and she even threw a party for them. #IstanRioNakamura

Who is more likely to ask the other to dance with them? Karma would ask Shuu to dance obv but Shuu would go along 😩💕

Who cooks best? Karma! And Shuu loves his cooking! :D

Who wears the other's jacket? Shuu is the one to wear long coats, and Karma those thicc jackets. Shuu usually gets super cold even with the coat on, so Karma gives Shuu his jacket on top of the coat lol.

Who uses cheesy pickup lines? Karma- anywhere. Have an example:

"Hey Shuu, could you feel the shirt?", he asked Shuu while they went shopping and Karma wAsN't sure about his T-Shirt choice so Shuu was running his fingers slightly over Karmas chest with the shirt still on and thinking about the material, then Karma went: "Know what it's made of?", and Shuu looked at him and was about to answer him, but Karma was quicker and continued, "Boyfriend material", ObViOuSlY with a grin and Shuu was a gay blushing mess 💅 but then Shuu went along, "What do you mean boyfriend? I can only see Husband material", and tuRNED AWAYYYYY~

Who whispers inappropriate things in the other's ear during inappropriate times? AAAA I T H I N K I've written sum like this before- So two things that happened:

KaruShuu were invited to a funereal or sum and pls the church was quiet and stuff but obv Karma had to joke around and he leaned over to Shuus ear and whispered a joke into his ear which made our stubborn Shuu giggle and the church was this close👌 to throw them out lmao

Shuu was at work, and Karma likes to call him randomly, but oh well Shuu picks up and Karma starts to tease him over the phone maybe something very sexual stuff (knowing Karma he would) and Shuu just- he is sitting at his desk and his workers are giving him looks about why is he blushing so much.

Who makes the other laugh most? Karmas jokes always make Shuu laugh, sometimes even cry since they are hilarious.

Who would have to bail the other out of jail? Oh my God- Shuu would have to bail Karma out of jail maybe during college years, but I think Karma would mature a bit more as an adult

What would be their theme song? YOOO- A WHOLE PLAYLIST WOULD BE NEEDED-

Who would sing their child back to sleep? OOO!! Karma would be the type to read stories, but Shuu would sing them to sleep :D

What do they do when they're away from each other? I can imagine that they both have those business trips from time to time, so when they are apart, they FaceTime each other every evening to check on each other. Yes indeed they must stay at fancy hotels for their business trips and they are being served food, but they still check that the other one is eating and sleeping well. Oh and good morning and goodnight texts™️🥰

A headcanon about them that stabs your feels? Oh- oH GOD- That maybe they tend to act very distant at first in their relationships?? Or more cold? For example Shuu, he would not really know nor show much affection to Karma and Karma at first thinking that Shuu doesn't love him at all (which isn't true bc Shuu loves him deeply) but then he after some time figures it out when Shuu opens up to him more.

A headcanon that mends the previous one? That they both after some time spend together, have the opportunities to open up to each other, know each other better as well as find out each others weaknesses and strengths which makes their relationship stronger. I absolutely love them ❤️😩

[yeahimaloser]

Oh, To Be In Love 3

part 3

Hawks and you are the best of friends, but little do both of you know how in love you two really are.

Hi! I’m really sorry I haven’t posted as often, a lot has happened in my personal life.

But! I feel better so I made another chapter! 

Warnings: none

Word count: 1935

Masterlist

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Hawks flew through the open air. The wind flowed through his feathers as he beat his wings in a fast and precise manner.

He looked down to see people looking up at him and pointing, no doubt in awe by the hero. He smiled to himself, and did a few mid-air tricks for the kids down below. Seeing their adorable smiles beaming up at him.

This was one of the many things that made him proud to be a hero, seeing the civilians look up to him. To let him inspire them to do better. To see the little kids look up at him in awe.

He looked down at his watch and his eyes widened, he was 5 minutes late. 

You had lechtered him before about this, and he didn’t want that to happen again. For one, he hated lectures. And two, he hated letting you down.

But then he heard a scream.

He wiped his head and scoffed, a convenience store was being robbed.

What kind of hero would he be if he didn’t stop to take care of a simple robbery?

He had to stop and take care of the robbery, but he sure as hell wasn’t happy about it 

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Hawks stopped on the rooftop of the restaurant that you two always met at.

There were very few places that would be discreet about a hero and a friend meeting for lunch. If this was just a normal restaurant, the paparazzi would have been alerted right away.

But a few of his sidekicks told him about this place, where if you paid the right people the right amount, you could eat without fear of the media breathing down your neck.

He was a little tired, but overall, very excited to see you. 

he stopped to remind himself, he was just your friend. And he was totally fine with that.

He waved to one of the waitresses who recognized him, “The table nearest the window, that's where Y/N is.”

He smiled at her, “Thank you so much!”

He strode over to you, but paused for a moment when he saw you.

You were anxiously tapping your foot, looking out the window. The sun hitting your face made you look even more stunning than you already are. Your eyes shown in the light, you face practically basking in it. He hated how you made his heart feel, hated the way he wanted to just tell you how he truly felt. But he also couldn’t stay away from you, you were just that intoxicating.

He gulped down his feelings, and counted to make his way over to you. 

“Ok, ok, ok, I’m sorry for being late. But hero business ya know,” Hawks said, shrugging.

You gave him a smirk, “Yeah I figured. So I already ordered for the both of us.”

Hawks gave you a smile, “Dove, you are the best!”

Hawks sat down across from you, still smiling. 

As he did, the food came out, obviously you had ordered him the chicken.

“But seriously, I thought you were supposed to be the fastest hero. So why are you always late to these things?” You asked.

He shrugged, “I’m not always late. Your overexerting, and besides, being a hero comes first to the general public. Believe me, I always try to be on time, the universe just has other plans.”

You rolled your eyes at him.

“So anyways about the guy..” you said ominously.

He physically felt his heart sink into his stomach. But he refused to let his smile falter, even if he felt like curling up into a ball.

“Oh yeah! How did it go? What did he say?” He asked.

You just sighed, “Ugh, I told him I didn’t want to go out with him.”

That's when Hawkses smile fluttered from his expression. He genuinely wasn't expecting that, he was ready for you to tell him how happy you were. He was expecting you to forget about him and move on. He was expecting to lose one more thing he loved.

But here you were, telling him how you didn’t go out with the guy. Giving him a glimmer of hope.

“Why,” he didn’t mean to blurt it out, he was just so confused, “Sorry! I don’t mean to be rude or anything, but why? You have nothing to lose by getting into a relationship.”

You looked down at your water, swerling it with your straw, “Yeah, I know. But it's just,” you let out another sigh, “I don’t know, he just wasn't all that. He was mediocre at best. And I just didn’t want to settle, you know?”

As you looked back up at him, he felt his stomach flutter, “Yeah, I definitely agree. You could probably have anyone you want.”

You rolled your eyes, “yeah ok, what about you, your all the news outlets talk about. They say you're quite the playboy.”

Hawks wanted to wince, he hated those lies. He really didn’t go out on dates very often, he was just so busy and always in the public's eye. It was just always unfair because he really did want to find someone. But with his supposed reputation it just made it so much more difficult. Not to mention the fact that he was a busy hero.

But he supposed he wouldn’t have minded the rumors if you didn’t believe them. But in reality did it even matter? You and him could never happen, so why was he so upset?

But he just laughed it off, “Na, no ones catching my eye I guess! And besides, I’m not a playboy,”

“Ok,” you said, “but you could have anyone you want.”

Not really, I can’t have you.

“Hmm, maybe, but na. Too busy I guess,” he said.

“Mhmmmm, ok birdboy. Anyways, I don’t really know why I don’t wanna date anyone, i guess I’m just picky,” you laughed. “I mean, if he’s not as funny, cool, and kind as my best friend then why would I want to date him?” You went back to lazaly stirring your water with your straw, not looking at him.

Which he was very glad about, considering the fact that a light blush dusted his checks.

He really didn’t expect that. What did that mean? Were you just being nice? Or were your intentions deeper…

He tried to make himself less flustered, “Haha, what do you even mean? I’m always late to our hangouts, I cancel things all the time, and I always have new cuts and bruises that make you supper worried about me. If you want my opinion, you should try to find someone who’s not like me, birdy.”

You chuckled, “Yeah, your right. But still,” you looked back up at him, your eyes stunning in the sunlight, “your an amazing person, Hawks, so why would I want a person to date me if they're less than you? My goal is to find a person that's so much better than you, that you’ll end up being so jealous you hang out with me more.”

I’ll be jealous of anyone you date that's not me.

Hawks laughed, “Wow Y/N, you're so mean to me. And here I was thinking you thought I was so perfect. But what? You wanna make me jealous? That sounds a little much.”

You giggled, “Your so dumb. Maybe if I cancel plans to go on dates you would actually come on time.”

“Oh how you wound me!”

You really do.

In reality, if that did ever happen he would probably get jealous. But that's why he kept you at arm's length right? For that very situation?

“So really, no ones catching your eye? I mean, you're surrounded by models, beautiful heros, and just amazing people in general. And you're telling me you don’t like anyone?” you quirked an eyebrow at him.

He smiled and shook his head, “No, really I don’t wanna date anyone. I’m way too busy and plus, those models and beautiful people are so fake,” he looked down at his food, picking at it, “All they want is money, status and just tacky shit. If I want a relationship, I want it to be real. I want to love someone so much that I’ll do anything for them. I want a relationship where we cook meals together, I want a relationship where we just eat ice cream at night and watch dumb movies together. I just want something real I guess.”

He looked up at you, your expression was one of shook.

“Wow Hawks, I never thought of you as someone so romantic,” your hand crossed the table, you grabbed his hand. The warmth of it made him lean into his touch. “You deserve all that. You deserve a real, loving relationship,” you smiled at him, “Your gonna make someone so happy. I can’t wait to see who you decide is worthy of all your love. I can tell you're gonna choose someone that you deserve.”

He gave you a smile, “Thanks Dove, I appreciate it. And, I think so too.”

Good thing I already have.

You rolled your eyes, “Why do we like the bird nicknames so much? Most of the time they totally suck.”

Hawks fained offense, “I thought Dove was cute! And your the one who calls me ‘birdboy’ so don't act all innocent!”

You laughed, “Because your reactions are so cute!”

“My reactions? You're the one with the cute reactions!”

You two just kept laughing for a bit.

This was what he loved about you, you just made him happy. Even you just making fun of him made him happy. He just… just loved you. There was no way to get around it, all he wanted was to hear your laugh for ages.

But that's when his work phone went off.

As much as he loved being a hero, times like these made him hate it. 

He gave you an apologetic look, he really didn’t want to leave you. He wanted to stay and talk to you for hours if he could. He wanted to see your smile and hear your laugh.

“I’m really sorry Y/N, but if they're calling me on my lunch break it must be serious,” his tone was sincere and sad.

He stood up and you stood with him, “Please Hawks, don’t worry. You have an important job,” you walked closer to him. “Just.. Just promise me you’ll be safe?”

He smiled at you, “I promise you Chicky, and I promise I’ll kick some ass.”

You giggled.

And then you kissed his cheek.

If you could hear his heart you might have thought that he was practically having a heart attack. But could you blame him? Your soft, yet firm lips on his cheek just made him all mushy and soft on the inside. 

When you pulled away he almost wanted to say, ‘to hell with it,’ and just kiss your right there. To feel your touch again, to feel your lips against his. That’s all he wanted in the moment.

But he stoped himself.

He blushed pink, trying to hide it he rubbed his cheek, “Aww, giving me a good luck kiss? Thanks Dove, be careful yourself ok?”

You rolled your eyes, but your face seemed a little flushed as well, “yeah, yeah, just go birdboy.”

He chucked, moving to open up the window. Another reason he loved this restaurant was because they were fine with him leaving through the windows. 

But before he left, he turned to see you leaving. But you too turned around to look back at him.

He gave you a reasering smile, and whispered under his breath,

“See you, my dove.”

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It’s done!!!

I hope you guys liked it!