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#and realizing it wont ever happen with you
mychlapci · 8 months
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cybertronian are very adaptable if a cybertronian takes a lot of big spikes. Their frame often adjust to handle them, Often making their hips bigger. you can always tell if a cybertronian has a bigger conjunx or just they just take a lot of big spikes because they got those thick hips. this is especially noticeable with minibots since a normal cybertronian spike can cause their frame to shift a little but a big spike, Oh boy, there is no hiding what that mini has been up to
minibots fucker anon
I am always in favour of cybertronian frames being very adaptable. They’re transformers, after all, it only makes sense that they’d be capable of adjusting their body to the perfect size.
mhmm the frame immediately snitching on the bot, their fat hips proof that they’re used to taking giant spike, either because of their partner, or they’re just a very promiscuous size-queen. It’s on you to figure out which one it is :)
I also kind of like the thought of bigger bots being able to size down their valve for their smaller partner. I think you wouldn’t be able to see that on their frame, but it’s just a very fun thing to think about (it’s also good for human/bot relatoonships)
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horrorshow · 1 year
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"when did destiel sex happen for the first time?" i love that i'm living so far in my own obscure deluded doomed by the narrative canon-compliant version of surprisingly wholesome but tragic destiel that the only right answer isn't even an option on polls: stanford era.
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sqlmn · 5 months
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Since Fulj and Holly exchanged chokers and then Ananza bought Oh a necklace (but looser than the girlfriends bc she still values whimsy and freedom in the AU)... Oh bought her a lil bracelet. And she is SO happy and adores it and them and she is very happy to show Deacon her cute friendship bracelet.
Cause. Ananza still adores Deacon in the AU and wants to dote on him like a mom despite how much taller he is (and probably the same age tbh).
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Being raised by adults who never apologized for their wrongdoings and always blamed their behavior on extenuating circumstances or someone else or their mental conditions really messed me up huh. Like all I asked was for you to apologize for yelling at me for asking you to hand me something because you thought my tone was wrong. But instead of an apology, I'm the one in the wrong because after all my tone was hostile to you and I need to remember that due to your ADHD you can't control your emotions. Nevermind the fact that I had carefully rehearsed the question in my head over and over again because this is not the first time this has happened. And I'm clearly a manipulative person for crying after being yelled at. Doesn't matter that I was thirteen, after all, I should've known better.
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the thing is the situation is extremely funny and also incredibly frustrating but also I just got off the phone with my father and the way he talks scares me so bad sometimes
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quietwingsinthesky · 1 year
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I’m not one for soulmates AUs but bobbyrufus soulmate AU of the ‘you have the last words your soulmate will ever say to you on your body somewhere’ kind.
#I MAKE THE RULES OF THE AU AND WHAT I SAY IS THAT THE MOMENT THE WORM ENTERS BOBBY TIME IS UP#ANYTHING SAID BY OR TO HIM AT THAT POINT DOESNT COUNT#YES. THIS IS SO THAT BOBBY HAS TO LIVE WITH ‘I will never forgive you for what happened. you got that? never. so change the subject bob.’#ON HIM. THE WHOLE TIME. AFTER OMAHA. EVEN AS HES TRYING TO APOLOGIZE IN THIS SCENE HE KNOWS HE WONT BE FORGIVEN#BECAUSE ITS ALWAYS BEEN TATTOOED ONTO HIM. THHAT THEY WOULD END LIKE THIS. WITHOUT BEING ABLE TO MOVE ON.#and so that Rufus’s last words can say ‘I never said I’m sorry Rufus.’ rufus constantly carrying this reminder of what Bobby did.#of the fact that he hasn’t apologized. yet. of the fact that by the time he does it’ll be too late.#and then you just. look imagine. imagine with me.#they say this to each other. there’s that moment where they realize… that’s it. end of the line.#and then obv worm!samuel knocks them both out. them both going down thinking ‘oh this is what does it’ but it doesn’t. it doesn’t.#they wake up again.#and Rufus talks to Bobby. Bobby talks to Rufus. how is this happening? did they break the rules? get a second chance?#their words are still on their skin. unchanging. the last things they ever said to each other.#but there’s a glimmer of. almost hope. and then Rufus turns to shock Bobby. and Bobby starts backing away.#audible drop of Rufus’s heart as he realizes. no. they didn’t get out. and then he dies. Bobby is forced to kill him.#Bobby’s on the other end of the possession stick now. he’s the one with Rufus’s blood on his hands.#and the last thing Rufus said to him. he’s always gonna have it there on his skin. that Rufus didn’t forgive him. and then Bobby killed him.#(and it wasn’t his fault. he knows how possession works. knows there was no fighting this thing or saving Rufus.#but he still takes the brunt of the guilt. Carries it. till he dies and despite everything it’s still Rufus he wants guiding him through it.#bobbyrufus#spn#Bobby singer#rufus turner
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mildcicada · 5 months
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#U Have No Idea How Much I Miss Her.#i need to start actually drawinf again its been a hellish 6 months#its really easy to just fall out of the habit of it#i used to obsess over never being someone who just suddenly stopped drawing for weeks/months#it scared me. like a core part of my identity would have to change for that to happen or would be changed by that happening#and then once i didn't draw and wasn't drawing i felt like i needed something to violently change about myself to get me to start doing it#again. but i didn't need that i just drew something again and that was it. like that stretch of time didn't happen#drawing is just an activity you can choose to do or not do and there are no consequences for whatever decision you chose to take but it felt#so serious to me it is like i viewed it like death#which i was right about in a way but mostly in how death is just a thing that happens and that it wont be that sudden and insane#you will just be and then not be just like how you weren't and now are. its just like me drawing or not drawing lol#but that comic of ht papyrus by jnpie where he's looking at the puzzles he used to make and wondering if he'll ever do that again. or if he#wants to. its like that feeling. it always sticks in my mind#i have like a fear of thinking about when i will no longer care about something i care about now and its so weird when. realize i stopped#wanting to do something and caring about it and. i feel nothing on account of no longer caring about it lol. but i know that past me#is currently looking forward at me now and terrified. this is unrelated to that comic a lot but its like. thinking about how i will change#words#mine#IM NOT TAGGING THE ART bc i wanna actually finish some of these pieces tbh and like they are just the backdrop for my thoughts...#feels so hashtag tumblr to talk to yourself about some vague ass feelings or situation that no one else will look at ugh thats like#The tumblr experience. but i love reading other's personal posts and tags though..
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britneyshakespeare · 9 months
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i have a very peculiar life where i've often, due to chronic illness and the resulting reclusive tendencies from said illness, just plain not associated with people of my own age on a regular basis for months or years at a time. but when i do go out, i'm, like, not an unattractive or socially unsuccessful person. well i'm not necessarily socially successful but i'm not unattractive. and i'll look back on like a certain period sometimes and realize that i had a lot of people trying to pursue me romantically, and i'm like "hey what happened to that? its been such a long while since anybody asked me out........."
"oh yeah i dont leave the house"
#at my work i am the kid between kids#i am DEFINITELY too young to be considered to strike up a workplace tryst with lol. at least relative to my coworkers#most of my coworkers are women anyway#im one of the only 20-somethings who works in the entire district too.#tales from diana#not necessarily to say that i desire to be asked out in fact im very uncomfortable w it naturally. as an aroace person#who only ever has the pleasure of letting people down.#when i was a teenager though (especially before i realized i was aroace) no one ever asked me out#i felt very undesirable/unnoticed bc of it. in retrospect ppl did find me cute they just didnt talk to me.#i was kind of unapproachable. if i want to be really cruel to my teenage self then i could call her a pariah.#whatever ppl thought of me... nobody talked to me. and i never talked. plain and simple#then i entered the young adult world and it felt like everywhere i went there would be some man i hardly knew#asking me out when he had just learned my name. very strange to me!#im like why should you do that? i realize it's bc these men want a girlfriend#& they see me & i seem pretty & nice enough. theyre just like 'she will do'#no i wont! lol#sometimes i think like 'have i changed? that hasnt happened in quite awhile'#yes that kind of thing has ceased to happen since ive ceased to hang out w new ppl.#in the past year especially ive made more deliberate attempts to extricate myself from various social spheres#and i dont see really anyone socially except for some friends ive had for years.#if one of them were to suddenly express romantic interest in me. well. boy would that shake things up! lol#they know me though. they know i dont love.
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animutate · 11 months
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man i dontthink i can be in a real relationship ever again im just starting to process how everyone has treated me HORRIBLY
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atsu-i · 10 months
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#can I just release my anger and frustrations out? lol#sooooo an argument happened bet me and my twin#am gonna fucking tell my side okay?#today i got another appointment with an ent#and sooooo I did what i can do with chores before I leave#and okay there was supposed to be someone whose coming here today to do laundry and she is late#and my twin asked me to call someone who knows the one who did the laundry and I DID#i was getting ready and all of a sudden my twin cursed me out and got angry with me#all of a sudden#I was so confused#then since i didnt know what she was mad about i just kept quiet and then she asked me what's the number of that someone who knows the#laundry girl..she said that to me in an angry tone..i told her I already called and she coulve asked me normally about it#but she is mad and suddenly called me paranoid and all that shit? and am like where is this coming from?#she thought that the laundry girl wont make it and since am leaving for quite some time she will be the one who will do laundry#and I told her if that's whats making you mad you dont have to do it..call mom and tell her if the laundry person isny gonna come she will#find smone else and she said no if I wont do it no one will and am like ?????? but i was so frustrated atp i was yelling back madly lol#and now i realized that maybe she was mad at me coz she is left with some household chores since am gone for a while? coz of my appointment#but she still mad at me though and I also am and I dont think i can ever ever talk to her again#like seriously i thought it was just the phone call but she has all other issues with me and i dont understanf#i feel so bad and am mad and idk am just crying rn#idk if am the one in the wrong#like seriously#this is so long but idk where to dump this shit
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scarletiswailing347 · 11 months
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so the unfortunate thing about me is that, when it comes to the media i consume, i tend to have one 'anchor' (very rarely two) to keep me interested
this is necesary cause i have an incredibly hard time being interested in things in general so i have to purposefully spend my focus on one thing so that i can keep being interested in it cause otherwise i just kinda feel meh about the thing, i mean ill still watch and enjoy it but i wont be as interested as id like to be and may even drop it eventually after struggling to keep interacting with it (this is unfortunately what happened with empires, x-life, yogscast, and the lsmp seasons without mumbo in it)
if i ever drop that anchor whether purposefully or not then i lose interest in everything that ive ever connected to its rope -- i could still enjoy them sure but then at that point theyll just be like every other filler content in my life, like music when im washing the dishes
for hc its mumbo, for dsmp and smplive it was schlatt, for the scrunkly squad its boosfer and baablu
for lifesteal its zam
idk what happened behind the scenes but ill be honest its not looking good and theres a possibility i might have to drop him :/
#mine.txt#not sure yet tho cause without enough context it just feels like im doing something unnecessary that the affected party (lila)#may not necessarily want#i mean intuitively it seems like something that someone would want#guy who hurt you loses support? sounds great right?#but thats not really something everyone wants and i am Very Sensitive to feelings of intrusion whether by me or other ppl#either way im def gonna loosen the hold at the very least#i mean i Could look for another anchor but its a lot harder for me to attach to an anchor if they were attached to another anchor before#so for me to stay interested in something even after the anchor dropped there has to have been another anchor at the same time#like boosfer and baablu with the scrunkly squad#even if one of them drops i can still stay interested in ss (although i may become more focused on one inner circle more than the other)#also ill be honest i just dont really care enough about lifesteal in general to do that#what a shame i really liked zams character too#both drawing and making stories of him#just gonna go hard on baablu and mumbo if it ever happens ig#oh man just realized im gonna drop gen too if and when it happens#nooooo not my saturday morning cartoon T-T#it is what it is ig its not the first time this has hapenned and it wont be the last#honestly the best option for me to stay interested in something is for the plot/lore to be my anchor#unfortunately that very rarely happens cause of how character-driven a lot of stories are#and esp with cc-content its even moreso considering its nature#...just now realizing this May be part of the reason why i love mystery stuff so much#yeah the characters are important but they mean practically nothing without the plot like they wouldnt act the way they do without it
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xviruserrorx · 1 year
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Ah, yes, more blood... How nice 🫠
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jvzebel-x · 2 years
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🦋
#i genuinely-- GENUINELY-- believe more ppl would understand the phrase 'acab' if they were ever present for a camp sweep.#'''bUt ThEyRe JuSt DoInG tHeIr JoBs''' okay if you can give me that excuse after seeing a swat team worth of cops#shred tents in 30°< weather while trashing clothes&blankets at 3am in riot gear#youre actually just a bad person&should probably just admit that lmao.#like its currently illegal in pdx to hand out tents on the streets. street teams are no longer allowed to hand out life saving material.#this was enacted immediately after the last cold front bc fires happened bc how the fuck else do ppl stay warm#on the streets in 20°< weather. &like i dont think ppl realize how quickly you can go thru tents on city streets#SPECIFICALLY bc cops shred tents during camp sweeps. this is yet another in a continued line of laws passed#that-- to anyone who is willing to put in ANY EFFORT AT ALL-- are very obviously angled to kill homeless ppl.#&i really think that if more ppl saw the actual reality of what this all looks like together theyd at the very least#be embarassed if not ashamed to try to defend the pigs&their job which is literally to harm ppl lmao.#tell me theyre just doing their jobs after watching a team of them demolish everything a family has in the world.#there will for sure be officers laughing&physically+verbally abusing the ppl there. that will for sure be happening#bc i cannot stress enough that to do the fucking job in general you have to be a bad person willing to do heinous things.#but are the ones NOT doing that any better lmao? can you genuinely tell me theyre any better or feel any form of pity#as they do the exact same job as the awful ppl around them they just dont laugh or go even further while they do it?#its still legal in most states in the usa for cops to fuck fs street workers to prove theyre swers then arrest them after bc pRoOf lmao.#can you GENUINELY look me in the eye&tell me those cops are better than the ones that outright rape swers once theyre in custody?#i just. i just cant stand ppl who hold horrible beliefs wont further examine them at all&STILL need to be reassured#that theyre good ppl lmao. just be a bad person are you fucking serious why bother bending&breaking to deny it.#just like famous nepo babies crying about 'my mommy+daddy just FUNDED&CONNECTED me i wasnt GIVEN success :('#so you not only get to have EVERYTHING on a silver platter you also NEED to be assured that this wasnt what happened??? NO.
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cornappreciation · 2 years
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still planning on getting to those requests... and some additional ne related things later on (an animation planned, similar looping gif to my kitty one but i probably wont colour this new one) hopefully soon... then i may ghost again to return with a bunch of posts later... who knows! yippee :]
#i have had a REALLY interesting past month#got a job. actually lucked out and its a great location + management#failing two classes#realizing i SHOULD have declared a major last quarter#which i didnt realize bc i was a freshman and they dont usually tell freshman about it#(i could declare early bc i had a ton of credits from high school)#and my parents pay for college so i basically wasted their money. sorry guys :[#THEN i got a hyperfixation on some tech shit#wont go into details but i know more about operating systems than i ever cared to#got my first weed panic attack and genuinely thought i was going to die LMAO#it was less than 10 minutes that felt like 3 hours#besties DO NOT DO STUPID SHIT#if you think 'hmmm i didnt really feel that. i should take more next time' THAT IS THE DEVIL SPEAKING#INCREASE AS SLOWLY AS POSSIBLE#i am so stupid dont be like me!!!!! dont do drugs kids#also pro tip if youre ever smoking or whatever#and you get the thought 'oh god i overdose it was laced im poisoned im going to die'#and then you get visuals in your head of those things happening#YOU ARE DELUSIONAL and i mean this in a nice way if you can recognize that ur delusional then it goes away SOOO much faster#it was so weird bc after i realized this the anxious THOUGHTS went away but the sense of impending doom and physical anxiety symptoms like#rapid heart rate DIDNT go away for like. over 30 minutes#it was so fucking funny i was sitting there like 'why are you panicking. you are being so cringe rn'#well i can laugh about it now. dont be stupid guys#OH and i got time off frlom work to visit my family#which is very epic#TWO WEEKS to hang out w my dogs#pro tip you should keep CBD or black peppercorn in your room if possible bc that will help kill the 'im going to die' feeling faster#also just dont be a moron to begin with and take twice as much as you ever have before#(I AM STUPID)#and have water prepared bc the dry mouth was almost worse than the anxiety
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snekdood · 1 month
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man i wish i did have all this privilege everyone acts like I have for being a trans guy, my life would be way more chill. I wouldnt hafta worry about shit really
#see some nazi shit in my town? nah. doesnt matter. im a man after all ! doesnt effect me and totally never would !#seeing men being misogynistic or creepy to women? doesnt effect me emotionally anymore because im a man ! I have no feelings !#walking home alone at night? nah. doesnt matter. im a man! nevermind that im short and have long hair so I could easily be#mistaken as a woman especially at night and even if not- being short is something a motivated individual can use against me if#they want to- but it doesnt matter. im a man now! suddenly thats not a concern. suddenly this totally wouldnt happen. at all.#someone would approach me to try and see that im a man and go 'oh sorry sir my mistake I didn't realize it was a super special privileged#man please be on your way now'#many such cases#vent#gotta go to a gyno or some sort of doctor relating to my reproductive system? it'll all go perfectly smoothly and even better#now that im recognized as a man- surely there wont be any issues getting help now. it should be easier. im a man after all.#trying to find a place to belong socially? must be easy. im a man. disregard that im a man w poon for a second- that should surely never#play a role even if hanging out with cis men. they totally wont notice how I avoid the bathroom or locker rooms around them or ever#getting naked in front of them for any reason- its surely not just a matter of time till they find out and subsequentially start treating m#different. and nevermind trying to fit in in queer spaces im a man so i dont belong in them as you know.#and nevermind being friends with women either- im a man so naturally that totally means all i think about is fucking women and never#just being friends with them so thats not possible and women should never work on their assumptions about dudes ever bc assuming#im probably a creep-rapist by virtue of attempting to interact with them is fine and normal for them to do and I should expect it#and totally be okay with it and totally just shut off my emotions to feel nothing about it#which is again normal#esp as someone who's also been victimized by cis men and then being assumed to be like an abusive cis man is totally something thats#normal and shouldnt effect me at all it totally does not fuck with you to constantly be assumed to be like someone who abused you#especially when you know you're not like that but ppl assume anyways and its normal to assume and i just have to accept it ig#cool#love that privilege i have
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rivilu · 3 months
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It's so weird to be playing a version of Elluin that's not going down a nightmare spiral in act 5
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