#and sometimes it makes a gal want to stop doing stuff for other ppl

[knight-intraining]

It's really annoying to me when people act like you shouldn't ask for attention or validation as a need.

Or when you give them an opportunity to reciprocate something nice you did for them, and they just don't.

Like, it was nice for you when you got the attention and validation, right? Well I want it too because it's a normal human need and I'm human. So like, maybe you could help me get it, yeah? Like I did for you.

[legendsgalore]

Stupid stuff ppl say to me at my work, just a personal rant

All of these are separate incidents, and sometimes i cant believe people are real, they can be this stupid, and they are not only living their lives but thriving despite being this pathetically stupid. For context, I work as a barista at a specialty chocolate shop, in a higher end historical area, it's a small business, and the shop is like 400 sq foot MAX. The customer base is mainly white, old, and rich people.

--- Customer: *walks into the shop, goes straight to the counter* So do you sell dark chocolate? --- Customer: *holds up a chocolate bar* So is this hot chocolate? --- Me: So this is a product called "Drinking Chocolate" Customer: So what do you do with it? --- Customer: I can't believe you guys don't sell chocolate dog biscuits --- Include every customer who has the "billion dollar idea" for the shop --- We have a drink specials board, where the drink is in colored text and right below it is the description of the drink in white, with the different drinks separated by a dotted white line. People will ask me what the drink is.....like the description is right BELOW it. --- Frequently, people walk into the shop, and I call out "welcome in!" To them. I can project my voice well, and i am a very cutesy-happy customer-friendly person at work. I get ignored like 50% of the time, and I have had people outright grunt at me. --- Person: *brings their dog into the shop* Me: Oh sorry, we don't allow dogs into the shop unless they are service animals Person: Oh...uhhh this is definitely a service animal Me: >:( (legally in my state I can't question that, unless the animal is being an outright nuisance/danger) --- We are also a coffee shop, and ppl have tried to buy milk from our fridges?? Like the literal gallons of it???? --- I am a tiny gal, height and size, and this is a frequent enough question that my coworkers and I joke about it: "So how do you stay so skinny working here?" "So how much chocolate do you really eat working here?" Or they say shit like this: "I would weight a thousand pounds if I worked here!" ew. just ew. --- Another thing is OVER HALF of the customers walk in and just go "MMMMMMM WOW IT SMELLS SO GOOD IN HERE!!!" Like, obnoxiously loudly, usually interrupting me welcoming them in. It's a valid observation, but it's annoying in the unoriginality, like everyone is in fact following the same script here. Plus everyone wants the same response from me, an enthusiastic nod and a "yeah!" I lost the will to do that a couple months ago. But, again, valid observation. --- Anyone who comes in and is loudly declaring how milk/dark chocolate is better in the tone where they actually believe the objectiveness of their statements and don't realize that it's a subjective opinion. Like I put out free samples everyday, and ppl will come up and outright go "Ew!" If it's their disliked darkness of chocolate. I've had customers try samples, dislike it, and then tell other customers that we make bad chocolate. Like sorry you didn't like the chocolate, but it was free and why are you trying to hurt our small business? --- Finally, everyone who walks in and goes "oH tHiS pLaCe Is So DaNgErOuS i ShOuLdn'T -" Then gtfu. If you don't want the perceived guilt of eating chocolate, then don't walk into the chocolate shop. No we don't have sugar free, calorie free, guilt free, chocolates. I am sick of all the jokes about how people shouldn't be here, shouldn't eat this, how they shouldn't buy more, how they're already buying too much (two bars of chocolate), how this is so bad, like omfg? Are you your mother? Stop with this diet-culture talk. It's disgusting. ---

However, despite the customers being stupid, it adds a lot of interest to my day, and I love my job. My boss is an absolutely amazing person, I would do literally anything for her, and I love all my coworkers. I am so lucky to have this job, and I respect the shop a ton. Despite my hope for humanity somehow going into the negatives over these months, I will give my 100% each day at work.

[crowstan]

Alright, so I actually did this last night while I was waiting for the melatonin to kick in, and I couldn’t post it because Tumblr decided that I can only post once a month on the mobile browser, so it’s honestly really late. Anyway, spoilers for My True Identity! | Sanders Sides, which is also linked because! Snazzy.

**Reminder!!** These are just my opinions and feelings, and aren’t factual at all! There are also instances of tone indicators in different spots as well, as those are something I use frequently in notes and pm’s. I also tried to keep cussing down to an absolute minimum, but in cases where I felt it was better to not change it, the words will be censored. THis is also a direct copy n paste, all i did was censor things a bit better.

-holy SH*T stuffed animals!! yes!!

-"SNOOZE!" ndhfhfjfhdhdhdh moooooood

-oh that intro title was snazzy!!

-jdjdjdj ok i was not expecting immediate noise, i shall note that next video

-jdjdjdj same man, same. sometimes you can't help but over share

-i KNEW there was theater!! yes!!

-"do i really know myself as well as i should? " uhhh, technically the self is a projection and a social construct but does anyone really? (/hj)

-got distracted because dream lover started to play from my playlist so i was kinda vibing for a bit before i continued lmao

-"hello there class!" djfhdhjf l o g a n!!! yes!! class time!! we gonna learn some mf stuffs about ourselves today!!

-in all seriousness, learning is fun unless it's about me lmaoo, I'm the only topic i hate, as much as i talk about it

-"this is my intellectual side! every fact that I've ever learned."

"believe it or not i was quite the nerd in school! "

"I'm pretty sure that's a surprise to no one" lmfaoooOOO sjjdjdjd?? that's legit hella funny ngl?? reads like the last two brain cells but one is v drunk

-djddjdj the sass. why is. roman sassy.

-also fanciful?? wow that's a word!! i like that word, imma steal it /hj

-"what's going on kiddos?" JFJFJFJRJR KIDDOS. I LOVE THAT WORD SM. Y'ALL DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE THAT WORD

-"I also represent your unabashed love of dad jokes." ??? me??? mood???

-ok ngl that kinda self aware joke??? yes. yes. y e s.

-thomas points out that most people know him from vine! this is correct he made AWESOME vines don't @ me please

-jdjdjf r o m a n. just called thomas o u t

-yes i am still aware this is all one person shhhh lemme sort the stuff n do the things n make them just slightly separate from each other

-thomas is really good with his characters and my knowledge that it's all him will not stop my awe of how well the characterization is because the instant you see each side? you can immediately tell they are carried differently than the others. that is HARD and i will appreciate that

-hfjdje WAIT THEY EACH HAVE A DIFFERENT DIALECT. THAT'S SO????? RHRHHRNRNR THAT'S HEL L A

-"Wouldn't want to be our own villain, would we?" uh, you're not supposed to do that? /j

-jdjdjdjdjd ideal. i would also like that in a person. except less cartoons n more whatever obscure video i find. did you know that an ultra shortcut works by hitting all the correct key check points in the right order, but without doing it as intended? Apparently the boundaries can overlap and the game thinks you progressed correctly! i think the coconut mall ultra shortcut is the coolest and i wish we knew more about it. this has been mini info dump with james, thank you for tuning in

-patton: asks a deep question that takes a lot of self knowledge to answer

also patton: hey, we have the same glasses!!

-why is that me at 3am

-jfjfjfjfjfjfjjf?? he mentioned we may have harder questions about ourselves like our gender or sexuality?? i funkimg STAN sm

-"where do babies come from?"

"you're a father"

"well, i know it has something to do with storks"

-GOSH i love patton!! he is my official favorite now, i don't take criticism at all on this topic

-"Am i right tony?"

"not my name"

"then what is it?" jdjfjfjdjr me after i come out as trans n ppl don't know my name

- a a a smol hamster, a tiny ladsy

-"youtubes" djdjdn sometimes i say that, huh

-DHJFJFJR GUYS GALS AND NON BINARY PALS DJFJFJFJRJRIIEIEISISJDHD!!!

-the end card with patton??? a mood. a M O O D

(written: December 1, 2020, 23:49)

[dclly]

     hello friends !! it’s ya gal moose (she/her, 21, cst) & i’m finally home from work bless!!! i’m just ur local…..run of the mill bug-loving canadian. this intro is gna be messa af but…it be like that sometimes. i am so very thirsty so pls if u wanna plot just hmu or like this and i’ll come to u! u can also catch me on d*scord @ bug lady 🦗#8530 if u prefer that!

     pls be advised that there are mentions of: trauma, sexual assault, ed, drug use & addiction below!

     #KRISTINE FROSETH | CISFEMALE | SHE/HER | BISEXUAL - DOROTHY LINDVIG is a TWENTY-ONE year old ICE SKATING INSTRUCTOR that moved into apartment A2 a good TWO YEARS ago. the AQUARIUS has been in town for TWENTY-ONE YEARS overall and is well known around seattle ridge for being +VIVACIOUS +CLEVER, but has a reputation of being -ALOOF and -FACETIOUS. guess that’s why they call them the AMARANTH around these parts! (moose, 21, she/her, cst.)

ok so !!!! first thing’s first, she usually goes by the nickname dolly. but she doesn’t care too much abt what u call her u can call her fuckass and she’d just be like what’s up

she’s a town native !!! grew up in a shitty area w a kind of shitty family. parents were never around, always off on benders or just….generally bein shitty parents. dolly & her older brother had to learn how to take care of themselves when they were pretty young and they’ve always done just fine. they didn’t have a lot of money so dolly got pretty good at playing up the cute lil girl role and getting free stuff out of ppl

as much as she claims she relies only on herself, she also relies heavily on the kindness of strangers bc without them she definitely would have gone hungry for real

in order to stay away from her house as much as possible she would hang out at the skating rink as a kid & eventually after stealing a pair of skates from the lost & found she taught herself how to skate & eventually figure skate as well. she’s always wanted to go pro but…..obviously couldn’t afford the training or put in any of the effort required to go all the way.

her brother used to throw pretty big ragers in their place when their parents were gone so……she started drinking & doing drugs at a pretty young age & just generally hanging out with ppl who were much older than her & v bad influences.

trauma tw & sexual assault tw !! it was at one of these parties that she had a traumatic assault experience w one of her brother’s friends when she was a teenager. to this day, she still hasn’t told anyone about what happened. it happened on more than one occasion and her brother is still friends w this boy so she just…..does her best to avoid him & pretend that nothing ever happened bc she refuses to acknowledge her trauma

she was pretty popular in school but never rly felt like she had any true friends ??? none of her relationships were all that deep and she mostly just hung out with people to get free stuff LMAO and like rides places i guess

but she does have her lil group of friends that she truly cares abt and when she actually cares abt u…….she’s around for LIFE u cant get rid of her sorry

she got emancipated when she was 16 and has been living on her own ever since. at first she’d would just stay at friend’s houses and sleep on their couches, but that stopped when she finally got a job at the skating rink teaching kids how to skate & got a new place to live. she’s been chillin working there and living in the apartment building for a couple of years now

definitely has had……many sugar daddy-type relationships in the past bc she would much rather have money handed to her u know

that is…..a v brief outline of her life up until this point but imma talk a bit abt her personality now

she is…..very magnetic tbH. knows how to draw in a group and keep them interested

knows how to bat her eyelashes and flirt if it means she’ll get something out of it

she’s kind of mean, kind of not ??? she is v moody a lot of the time tbh like it’s either hit or miss with her. sometimes she’ll be in the mood to have a big long chat and in a split second she’ll be telling u to fuck off

likes to know everyone else’s drama but doesn’t like having drama of her own

kind of does her own thing ???? marches to the beat of her own drum. doesn’t rly follow any rules. she’s just out here

does most things out of spite. even if she doesn’t want to do something, if someone tells her she cant do something she’s gna do it no matter what

very animated and lively. the type to dance in the middle of the grocery store if a song she likes is playing

also the type to dance on tables at the club

doesn’t rly care what ppl think about her but…..does at the same time ??? if ur important to her she cares deeply abt ur opinion but if not……..she doesn’t give a FUCK

she always has to keep herself busy or else she’ll lose her mind :))))

will do…….literally anything to get something for free ??? doesn’t matter what it is or who u are. she can HATE u but…..she will still give u head behind the 7/11 for a free slurpee u know :/

i wouldn’t say she’s hypersexual but she is highly sexual thx to her trauma !!!

she is friendly yet distant at the same time so like……while she will happily talk to u and hang out with u and whatever she avoids deep conversation topics ig ??? she always finds a way to leave or change the subject when it gets serious or make a joke out of things bc she can’t………talk abt stuff ajsdfjkgdjgk

a very witty & clever girl. she’s v smart and would have done well in school had she had a slightly better life & didn’t have to worry abt whether or not she would starve

some extra tidbits abt her !!!

a good portion of her clothing is vintage/thrifted. she would describe her aesthetic as a 70s teenage boy’s wet dream. shoes are her fave & she’s always wearing some funky type of boot or platform shoe

just a real fashion bitch !!!!

catch her online shopping at almost any given moment

mental breakdown haircuts at 2am are her Mood

she loves going to cute lil vintage diners & drinkin a cherry coke 4 the aesthetic u know

can’t keep a relationship to save her life. will date someone and put herself FULLY into the relationship but…….will either get bored or cheat on them or put them up on a pedestal so it’s destined to fail after one lil mistake or do something to fuck it up 

she is a self-sabotager like that bc she doesn’t believe she’s deserving of love or any good things really :///

smokes too many cigarettes

drug use & addiction tw !! smokes a lot of weed as well. catch ya girl doing fat bong rips all day long. also does a lot of cocaine. has a coke addiction, in fact. also catch her running away to the bathroom for a bump 12 times a day. she rly just…..doesn’t like being sober, she tryna run away from shit

her fave colour is red

she has a cat named freddie who she adores more than anything else on the planet

likes to play poker & gamble

will literally try anything once

hates herself & is rotting inside!!!!!!!!!!!!

eating disorder tw !! another symptom from her trauma is the eating disorder she developed as a teen. food is…..one of her few things in life she can fully control so she controls it a Lot. 

just wants to have fun and forget abt how disgusting she feels on a daily basis & how much she hates herself :))))))))))

generally just………….a messy bitch

this is……a LOT. i don’t have a full wc page or anything atm but here are some lil connection ideas for her!!

friends !! ppl that don’t actually know her all that well but she pretends they do anyway

perhaps………………a best friend……….

exes !! ya girl puts her whole entire being into relationships even tho she runs away from them right after bc self sabotage ???? so she prob isn’t on good terms with any of her exes but……she’s my bi queen so this is open to anybody!!!! would prob b really angsty which is grand

a drug dealer perhaps??

party buddies, drinking buddies, w/e. bad influences. let them influence each other to be Worse

previous fwbs & hookups, that kinda thing, she prob has a lot

maybe someone she cheated on a partner with ??? for Drama

or like….someone who’s relationship she fucked up idk

maybe someone who has a crush on her or something & she’s like…….pls don’t what r u doing……..gotta Jet

a good influence??? someone please help her.

idK i want angst & cute fluffy stuff so just everything is good rly

tbh i will prob do an actual wc page at some point but here is what i have for now

this was a lot i am sorry. bless u for reading this far thank u. 

[macbookpro-hard-drive]

HI HOW DO YOU WRITE CHARACTERS

hewwo! i can answer this! im literally gonna do a quick list of both deh and bmc characters for u under this readmore! :D

im gonna start with deh because smaller cast!

evan: 

isn’t so much stuttery as he tends to repeat things and uh stammer a bit here and there. stutters over his words sometimes but it’s more l-like this and uh, like… like this

evan hansen has anxiety. he is not anxiety. evan hansen fucks up and makes mistakes and probably internalizes a lot of things. very polite when in public but he can be a bit snappy (as seen w evans comment abt how zoe’s parents have never been poor i believe? it was something he said to zoe)

soft spoken, most of the time. probably not the kind of guy to vocally ask for things until he’s at a comfortable enough point that he feels like he’s not bothering you (same buddy)

i see evan as someone who gets frustrated with himself easily. not as a sense of “god i wish i were normal” but more of a “i should be able to do this, why cant i do this, i want to do this but i cant” because sometimes it’s just a matter of i literally cant do this and i dont know why? and god its so frustrating sometimes

jared:

jared kleinman is a fucking asshole and he knows it. very sarcastic and uses it to cover up his own insecurities, probably the kind of dude who laughs in your face when you tell him off when internally he’s just OH FUCK OH SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK

a lot of ppl write jared as being insecure abt his weight and tbh i don’t see that being a problem for him? i see jared as being insecure abt the fact he comes off very snarky and assholeish but he turns it around and tries to own it even though… that’s not something you want to be proud of? and he knows that

not the kind of dude who stops to assess his feelings. he powers through shit and insists he’s okay until he’s out of steam. i think it was psy who said he’s a “needs therapy boi” and tbh she’s right? 

can be very passive aggressive imo it’s something he really needs to work on.

arrogant, sarcastic, and just a big fucking dick who needs to learn how to watch his mouth.

zoe:

not an pure baby angel, by any means. we’re at a disadvantage because we only see zoe when she’s sort of grieving (because grief can and will come in different ways, and while i see her as not missing connor, i do think that her pushing away her feelings is a form of her grieving imo? it’s a weird thing to explain but there’s a part of zoe that does miss (the old) connor’s presence as w the fake emails evan “gave her her brother back” (albeit a very fake version of connor) and sort of standoffish when it comes to the subject of connor

a bit of an ambivert. extremely outgoing when she’s around her friends or when it comes to music and other things she loves.

very individualistic! her style tends to have doodles on her clothes, she dyes her hair a lot, she probably would be the kind of person to make her own jewelry!

very sweet. the castng call for zoe describes her as being the kind of person who learns the names of the kids who sit alone at lunch and thats she goes out of her way to be nice to people since. connor. yeah.

thats all ive got for zoe but u can always send questions in and i can say yes or no after i ask my pals too

alana:

smart gal! valedictorian! president! i love her! tends to overshare a bit. anxiety + depression gal.

probably into gardening tbh? i can see alana having succulents in her room and maybe a dog that just chills with her.

dont be afraid to make alana mouthy. alana is someone whos extremely headstrong in her actions imo and does what she believes is right, even if others dont believe that. like… think about the fact that she literally published what was believed to be connor’s suicide note because she thought it’d get them the last bit of help they needed for the orchard. it literally fucked the murphys over - but she never considered that?

very much an extrovert. just really wants to belong, man. very optimistic on the surface but i can see her being a little less so underneath. she looks on the bright side because if she doesnt, she doesnt know who will and idk i dont think alana’s the kind of person who just... lets that risk be there.

connor:

we dont kno much abt connor in canon but uhhh…. i can see connor as being a loner, sort of aggressive by accident (tbh this dude’s probably used to people being a dick to him so he’s just sorta standoffish in response) but like… whenever i write connor i usually write him as getting better? he’s gotten the help he needs and he’s doin better 

artsy depressed dude. poetry, painting, ect - whatever u want tbh. i just see connor, with help, finding himself in art or something creative (theatre and music included! u do u!)

very much a reader. this dude both has a lot of books on his bookshelf and a lot more books he hasnt fucking read because hes terrible at reading new books. (i personally hc he loves all of poe’s work)

to sorta sum connor up: bold, but not outgoing. caring, but not obvious with it (once he gets help btw). easily angered but sometimes he just doesn’t fucking know why and that frustrates him further. troubled.

honestly if u want to see one of my fave connors - check out @ask-sincerely-memes​! i rly love how they portray all three of the boys, but connor is by far my favorite! (mod con and/or mod ev if u read this i love u)

OK ONTO THE BMC FUCKERS if you want to kno abt the adults for either show then feel free to ask

jeremy:

anxiety boy, but not evan hansen level of anxiety. more just… self deprecating, not super confident in himself, probably underestimates himself a lot.

jeremys hard to explain sometimes because a lot of his actions and dialogue comes naturally since i can actually relate to jeremy a lot, personality-wise? a really good fact to throw out there is i don’t think jeremy’s the kind of guy who just goes for stuff sometimes. he has to sorta be hyped up by others imo. michael motivated him to sign up for the play, rich and michael both played parts in getting him squipped (michael in the aspect of “lets check this out and see if its legit” bc i doubt jeremy would have genuinely done that on his own).

which really means jeremy isnt the kind of guy to just… confess things, unless it’s built up enough (i.e. jeremys confrontation w reader in unlonely since it was a conversation he’d been thinking about for a bit). in canon, he didnt really… confess to christine without the help of alcohol (at the halloween party) or without other people building him up (voices in my head). 

im literally rereading jeremy fics rn because im trying to come up with a good way of describing him

extremely horny teenage boy. hormones suck. for anyone who writes nsfw: i dont see jeremy being incredibly kinky and sexual and dominant (god forbid) his first fucking time having sex. especially if its both him and the readers first time. sex can be clumsy. you can laugh during sex. but also sex smells. like… once you’ve smelled it, you fucking know it - its just a weird combo of sweat and bodily fluids. 

that last part was just a PSA for ppl.

lightweight boy. a lot bolder when drunk. thank you.

honestly if u have any questions abt jeremy, i can try to answer them more specifically but this is as general as i can get.

michael

not an uwu anxious depressed innocent baby boy uwu. remember that michael literally withheld the mtn dew red from jeremy because he wanted an apology. remember that michael wouldnt have been squipped because michael had been completely comfortable with who he is. michael likes his place. he doesn’t want to be cool and popular - he likes who he is. michael in the bathroom was a peak moment of michael finally letting go of emotions he’d been withholding - jeremy calling him a “loser” was the final straw that broke him. thank u this has been a psa.

a goofy boy. probably snorts when he laughs and im not projecting there what are you talking about-

okay, canonically: likes video games, likes retro shit (probably the kind of nerd who LIVES for arcades and record stores and vintage clothing stores even if he doesnt mix that into his personal style), very into music. there’s a lot you can do with this! 

imo he’s very caring? like. okay, yes he did withhold mtn dew red from jeremy - but michael still went through the trouble of finding and obtaining that in order to deactivate the squip. i think michael’s a fairly understanding dude, even if he has moments of anger.

just a very warm person. probably the kind of person who stops and makes sure people are okay when he notices they’re upset.

sometimes impulsive. sometimes very restless, imo. bouncy boy. 

like w jeremy - you can absolutely send me questions abt michael (or anyone tbh!) and i’ll answer them the best i can! im by no means an expert but ive got pals i can bother in order to help get a solid answer :3

christine

chriiistiiiiiiiiine, the love of my life. a gal w ADD! please don’t forget that! i personally hc that she got into a theatre as a way of like… sort of getting energy out since she’s fairly restless??? track girl christine….. also good

loves herself a lot tbh! like. in the show, its canon that she has stuff to figure out but i personally think christine loves herself and her body and is proud of who she is?

very friendly, very open, very passionate abt theatre! these are basic facts lmao

very sweet! very smart! she’s like... The Girl in all the movies that everyones like “oh no i love her” bc shes just a bubbly gal

writing christine is really hard to describe sometimes. like with all the characters, i write what feels right and sounds right to me and to others.

but like... to be honest, as long as you stay a bit happy and supportive and loving with christine - you’re on the right track.

jake

god - one of my favorite boys to write sometimes because there’s a lot to do with jake’s character

he’s the ultimate cool dude in high school. probably the kind of dude who would join a frat in college. handsome, popular, flirtatious - you fucking name it man.

sorta effortlessly popular and cool. there’s problems underneath - considering his family - but it’s hard to see that he has flaws when everything just comes so easily to him.

a very caring and sweet dude tbh. his friends mean a lot to him and he’s the kind of boy who carries your books and asks where you’re going and how you’re doing

he makes mistakes. he gets aggressive and protective and just angry physically - he did try to attack jeremy, albeit drunk, based purely on the idea that jeremy was having sex w chloe - so like... that’s a good thing to acknowledge

i said hes flirtatious and he is - without realizing it. someone probably has called him out on it and he’s like “sorry what?” bc he was caught up in talking to someone and not realizing that the dillinger charm never went off. because it never goes off. rip.

rich

GOD, my FAVORITE BOY, the LOVE OF MY LIFE, i love him.

squipped: aggressive. a bully. stinky. 0/10.

post-squipcident: getting better. sorta numb at first before happy, outgoing rich resurfaces because He’s Fine! Do Not Worry! but y’know like... he definitely has a lot of problems with what he did and who he was while he had the squip

a bit sensitive imo. easily upset on certain topics, easily angered on others. really misses his mom (i hc she died and his dad took up drinking as a coping mechanism and its mainly rich and his older brother relying on each other but thats just me tbh.)

rich is tricky to write when it comes to his home life. while i see rich’s dad as being a loud drunk, others see him as being physically abusive and so forth and - okay, that’s your decision, but please make sure you’re being respectful and you post trigger warnings because some people are in abusive homes and it’s not a fun thing to read. 

great sense of humor imo. flirtatious but in the more obvious “haha hey lets bone ;)” way. alternatively: flirtatious with squip, floundering a bit without it because all he knows is “haha hey wanna fuck” 

would probably fight a dick for his pals. rly just loves his friends even if he doesn’t show it.

chloe

chloe is a bit hard to write without saying “shes kind of a bitch” but like... she is and she knows it and she fucking owns it.

casting call: “ confident, crass, sexy, manipulative, and downright mean at times”

so like. she’s nowhere near bein a sweet angel baby uwu

has problems. explore them. she literally was down to fuck brooke’s boyfriend since jeremy was dating brooke yknow. part of it could be alcohol but like... dont ignore that fact. like. she probs needs to talk to both brooke and jeremy.

i think of chloe as someone who can see the potential in others tbh. gets slightly annoyed when people arent achieving what they could - but i like to imagine she gets it after a while since some ppl dont have confidence and such. 

yknow the kind of people that take charge when the situation calls for it? that’s chloe. she’s very much a leader. cunning, ambitious - she’s fucking ready.

brooke

more of an angel i guess? sweet, a bit insecure, and a little more caring. not very dominant in situations - tends to be more of a follower (as shown w her and chloe’s friendship)

very caring actually. she literally followed jeremy out and said “uhhh he was kind of a dick to women but i know u like eminem” upon his death in the show??? like??? she literally went to check on this boy.

imo she sorta needs to learn to be bolder. to not take shit. shes probably the kind of person who says yes to a lot of things even if they’re conflicting bc she doesn’t want to like... bother someone and make things worse

emotional, imo. fairly feminine.

its hard to keep describing sdfkjhds sorry

jenna

not popular. remember that she wanted people to be interested in her, which is why she gossips a lot

probably tends to overhear half of the gossip. other than that, i can see her easily finding shit out bc she has eyes Everywhere

bold, fairly extroverted, probably really fucking smart tbh. give her love. she deserves it.

thats both at me and everyone else. jenna rolan ily...

very much a big sister figure, post-squipcident. theres this kdrama i was watching where the main protag lives w a couple other girls and one of the oldest one of the bunch is very much a big sister figure that will call other people out on their bullshit because she knows protag isnt the kind of person to do that? thats jenna. and chloe, but mostly jenna.

probably the kind of person who wants to be helpful imo. she likes feeling useful.

[starrcrossrose]

Here's what DBZ has done for me in only the last year

(Mind you, I've only been dedicated to watching for about 2 years, but that makes the last year even more amazing bc of the short time span)

This will be sort of a long post. But if you like sappy stuff like me, then read along!

1. It made me draw more

I was hardly ever drawing since I started my full-time, adult job in phone retail bc my stress levels were high and my creativity low. But ever since really delving into the DBZ series, I'm constantly in a mood to draw something. (Bless you, Yuya Takahashi, my art brain short-circuited when I started the Majin Buu arc)

2. I made new friends

I have nothing against the friends I currently have. Hell, the ones I still DO have since high school are my ride-or-die's. But, to have the ability to make new friends (and not bc of them being coworkers that I spend nearly every day with) just off of something we all share a passion for? Amazing. I even have one new friend I text like, every day and she is the sweetest thing. And all because we bonded originally over our love for DBZ! I'm now part of a group chat of girl who love Vegeta (bc, come on, how can you not?) and have found so much amazing art and writing that I even bought my first fanzine and have been planning on meeting most of these guys/gals in person someday!

3. It made me stop caring what others think

Ok, maybe not completely. Life and human emotion is a little more complicated than that. But, as I've made these new friends and seen their passion and creativity for a fandom that has been kicking and screaming (literally) for like, 20+ years is so AWESOME. And in observing this, and as my own love for the show grew, I started branching into territory I had never ventured to before, creatively. I started doing fanart. I started writing fanfiction which is something I never thought I would be able to do. I even posted publicly to my lifelong friends and family (some of whom used to make fun of me for liking anime when I was a kid) that I just didnt care anymore. I wanted to like what I wanted to like, and to have fun, dammit. I may have always seen like the type of person to do or say or wear whatever, but my mind was always thinking of what others thought of me. I no longer want to, and I've been slowly really growing out of that self-consciousness for a while without me realizing it. All because I was so in love with the world and characters of a fiction that ppl grew up on.

4. It taught me to keep fighting for myself

Listen. In our shitstorm of a world as of late, my mind was a mess. I was constantly living in the past, constantly fighting back anxiety and stress in waves that were often debilitating. I even rode the roughest wave of depression in YEARS, to the point of wanting to give up on ever doing something arts related again. But, I was still watching DBZ, still delving into the story of characters I had grown to love, and it was the ONE really bright thing I cared about that wasnt my husband at the time. On top of all that, watching DBZ has been, not quite a distraction, but a coping mechanism for a good/bad/sick day throughout the entire year. It has made me want to grow as a person, to be someone better and stronger than the person I am today. I've always been headstrong in my dreams, but adulting really wanted to suck those things out of me for good. DBZ has made me realize there is a shared passion in a show so beloved, that it has opened multiple doors of conversation for me, even at work! (I have Vegeta on my phone case, lol)

5. DBZ has taught me to never give up

This is such a cliche, something a lot of people have said about this show. But, to reference back to the above points, I really did want to give up everything early this year. I wanted to quit my job, to move states, to be alone. I wanted to never write or draw again bc "I was never going to be good enough" (silly me) to be recognized. But, with the comfort and assurance of my husband (God bless him) and through the comfort of watching a show that filled me with joy, I grew. My husband and I sold our art at a local parsde and actually made a profit! (Small profit, but I was expecting to only break even, so I was very surprised.) My favorite character in the show ended up being Vegeta, which surprised no one who knows me, but for reasons that I've come to understand bc, at first, I didnt know why I liked him so much. But, I began to get it. A character like Vegeta, who is constantly being one-upped, constantly being viewed as 2nd best, constantly struggling and training to be better, was exactly how I felt. And sometimes, I still feel that way. The art world is incredible, but also cruel and overwhelming. It's easy to beat ourselves up, but much harder to push ourselves off the ground when random people like to kick artists while we're down. .But, I brushed myself off, got to my feet, and basically gave the middle-finger to the world and to myself for ever considering giving up. I would be stronger. I would be better, in every aspect of my passions and dreams, and I would NOT give up. I wanted to be like Vegeta who, through growth and reflection, took pride not only in who he was, but eventually, in his OWN strength.

In Short (lol):

DBZ has literally changed my life in such a short span of time. And I am forever grateful to my husband for finally sitting my ass down and making me watch it, and also to the fandom, who has been nothing but supportive and friendly in my short time here. Thank you, Akira Toriyama, and thank you Toei Animation. You've literally helped a person who needed to see a show like this one more than she ever thought she would.

[gg-astrology]

Thanks for the awesome answer to the 8th house stellium ask. I also have an 8th house stellium (Venus/Neptune/Uranus/Saturn) and EVERYTHING I read about it has been pretty scary. If you have time a few thoughts on those particular planets would be appreciated if not no worries. Again thank you. - Stay Free

Hey there! 💕 God I’m just glad it helped someone out there 💕

Wow honestly your placements are one of the better ones in the have in the house imo? I’m going to try to answer to the best of my ability, but it’s probably not like, a straight cut answer. I’m going to focus on stellium support first, then links to your individual placement in the 8th house, and then the importance of aspects to each other. And end up with my opinion of your personal placement in the 8th house (the Real Answer to your question) 

Ps. I don’t think you know but I feel the need to warn you that I talk in like–really whack metaphors/analogies, so if you were looking for a straight-cut answer sjnfksnf I’m sorry I’m probably not the gal  😞💕

[Below Cut: How To Deal With Stellium (8th House) + Venus | Neptune | Uranus | Saturn in 8th House (general positive traits links + my own opinion on them) ] 

Stellium Support: 

I honestly think the houses and the stellium we have in them all just comes down to how we make of it? It’s like the downside of popularity. Having a stellium comes with extra power and fame, but at the same time there’s instability and unsupported aspect that also comes with it. It’s hard to be balanced in a stellium. Some people choose to ignore the downside completely to hype up their good side, some people aren’t so lucky to be able to do that. 

It’s like watching celebrities tabloid sometimes. But ultimately, as the person affected by the stellium, maybe the best way to go about this is to be honest to ourselves as much as possible and try to balance it out in the best way we can (within our resources).

It sound? super vague and hard to do, but think of it as like trying to cope with fame while living a normal life. Reaching out to family, friends, doing groceries, walking the dogs, etc. There’s always going to be some paps and people talking shit about you even when they don’t know you. It all just comes down to sticking to your guts, hustling harder and being as true to yourself as you can be so you can pursue your own happiness.

General Support on Placements: 

As for your placements in the stellium, there’s definitely some good things about it there! Personally, I don’t think anything I can say can really top astrocodex’s description of what it’s like to have those planets in the 8th house. I think this will help you more. It’s a little contradictory but it’s all good basics, and it talks about your placement in an overall better light, I’ll link to it here: Venus | Neptune | Uranus | Saturn

Importance of Aspects: 

Once you’re done with that, it’s a little more to do with aspects to those planets? Conjunctions are important, but whether you have anything from your stellium aspecting a planet outside (Mars, Moon, your Sun, Mercury) is just as important as well. That’s going to be a bit more indicative of how it comes across/affecting you personally. (see like, your Saturn-square-Mercury tells you more about how the stellium is acting/pulling you towards even with your Venus. It’s a chain bond. (link to an answered ask about conjunctions acting as chain bonds to each other if you need more details/clarification))

My Opinion on Venus | Neptune | Uranus | Saturn in 8th House:

If you’re asking me personally, I think having your Venus-Neptune there is amazing. Sure there’s bad parts to it during the development, but once you reap the result of your hard work (Saturn) you’re such an incredibly giving person in your relationship? You hustle hard for it, and there’s hardship but you have the inner-strength to get through it. For sure. Your core is way tougher than anyone else out there. And within that, is the softness that you’re capable of demonstrating as well. 

“An individual with this placement will definitely have to learn how to let go, no matter if it is belongings, beloved people or situations that end. Of course, he will be reborn in a new light, wiser and more experienced to embrace what is of value.”Theastrocodex 

Besides the Venus-Neptune aspect. Your Neptune-Uranus also smoothen out the ride. Yes, there are some downsides to it. But you’re flagged by Venus-Saturn on both your side here and it’ll help counterbalance everything into order again. You’re capable of so much more, you just have to reach out for it. 

Saturn’s actually pretty good for you here? Since it helps with keeping everything un-tilted. Think of it as an aircraft maybe? Your Venus and Saturn are the wings, and this Neptune-Uranus is the body. The external environment can be tumultuous, especially since Neptune-Uranus is acting like a portal thats sucking everything in. But with the help of Venus (some active/conscious positive thinking/self-care/treating yourself right) and Saturn (learning from experience, being grounded, trying not to lose control of reality) you’re bound to get through the ride without crashing. 

I hope you got what you need from this 💕 and I hope this answer somewhat got to help you. I know I didn’t like, give it to you straight. But I think this is the best way to tackle 8th house stellium in general. 

Like it’s so much more than just death and taxes? People think 10th house talks about fame but 8th house has just as much of an influence on if not more on the behind-the-scene of those fame (supporting it up). The analogies were catered to point to that. 

I didn’t want to leave you hanging, but the section on your placement + aspects were more of a DIY How To Read Your Chart or get a general read from it. I think it’s important to form your own positive opinion about it first, to counteract all the negative agendas. Instead of me just going in and babbling my mouth bc nobody with a 8th house placement would probably believe me on the first go dsjkfnk (possibly)

I added my own opinion in the end just in case it helps you. It’s more like, an add on to the astrocodex stuff but put into a metaphor for you to see all the good stuff about yourself and maybe take it off from there. You’re capable of being more, doing more, loving more. There’s turbulence on the air-craft, but some people enjoy the thrill of it y know? (it also stops ppl from going to the bathroom, which is always thrilling to see ppl getting told off for doing it ksdfn

Enjoy the ride! Let some shit go, learn to love yourself since you’re already capable of doing so much with that Venus already! You have all the materials and resources to make this shit right, and you’re definitely going to get out of it alive, maybe a little frayed, but ultimately winning the game! 

I hope this helps you!  💕 Thank you for asking!! 💕 I hope it kinda helps??

[kyunsies]

Mädch darling!!!! 💖💖💖

It's been a minute because I've been having an awful time lately! However!!!!!! I could not sit idly by!!!! So buckle up because I don't know if you're ready for this!!!

First! I love your gifs!!!!! I do!!! They are always so consistently lovely!!! Even if coloring or whatever isn't consistent, the joy I receive from seeing your gifs IS consistent. I'm NEVER annoyed by seeing you post your gifsets. I can always feel the love and joy you put into making them. Especially when you go off in the tags about whoever you happen to be giffing. I love that. I adore seeing you go a little insane about Changkyun (and so does my sister, so that's two, at least).

Secondly! If people are annoyed by your posts or the frequency, that's literally not your fault or your problem in any way, shape or form. It is up to each individual to curate their own experience on Tumblr. It is not your responsibility. Other people's experience on here is not your responsibility. Your blog is Your Space, and you can and will and must do whatever you want with it! Whether your gifs are good (they are) or bad (they aren't), or whether you post too much (not possible) or too little (also not possible), it is not your responsibility or problem if other people are annoyed. I know it can be disheartening if gifs don't get as many notes as you'd hoped, but I want you to know that you at least have one avid fan (actually I can say two fans - my sister also loves seeing your posts).

I hope you know that I LOVE seeing you on my dash. Whether that's gifsets or rb's or text posts or updates or other people's asks (I do read them occasionally), seeing you on my dash always makes me smile, without exception. I do also want to mention I put nearly everything in my queue, so it takes a while for posts to get reblogged sometimes... But! They're there, waiting to be posted.

Anyway!!! I hope your day improves by leaps and bounds today, whether that's by this message or other means (treat yourself? Call a friend? Gif some more?). I really do hope you can continue to do what you love to do without worry! LOL (lots of love) 💖💖💖 dkbtho

hi angel !!!!! i’m sorry i’m getting back to this so late :( i’ve been studying for my second exam of the week tomorrow :’) as always never worry about taking your time replying !!! i’m so sorry to hear you are going through a hard time right now 🥺 everything will end up working it’s way out, okay?

i also want to apologize for …. kinda being a crybaby :/ i’m going to be 100000% honest when i say that even if i were getting 0 notes, i would still be giffing 😭 i love giffing so much and it brings me so much joy . i’m so so proud of the progress i’ve made since the beginning and i’m so grateful for all of my friends who have helped me along the way …. i don’t want to sound like i’m ungrateful or complaining because i understand how annoying that must come across to everyone :( recently i just feel like my content is bothersome ?? idk if that’s the right word but even tho i make gifs because it makes me happy, i also want that happiness to be shared with others too and i just feel like maybe that’s not the case :( tumblr has brought me many great (and honestly some of my worst) online experiences ever and i wouldn’t trade it for a thing . but when you’ve been doing this for a while now, sometimes note count gets in your head and i’ll be the first one to admit it 😭 i try not to think so selfishly about stuff like that because again at the end of the day i absolutely love it, but i think it’s a common thing all content creators feel at some point in their time here …. at least i think?? i hope i’m not the only one …. and it’s hard to talk about that stuff in here bc sometimes ppl take it as “you only care about notes so if you’re unhappy stop doing it” so i try to be as positive as possible, you know?

i can’t help but sometimes think this way, you know? idk i just work really really hard and i want others to hopefully see and share the love that i have in making content ,,,,,,, but again, i also want to thank you so much for even coming here and saying this to me bub 💖 you have a lot going on and you totally didn’t have to take time out of your day to be super supportive, but you did and your kindness is really touching me 🥺 i never want to come across as negative to anyone but some days you are just more down on yourself than others, right? but regardless, thank you for your supportive and sweet words, they really made my heart swell earlier today 🥺 even if tumblr is in shambles (more than it is lol) this gal will still be giffing even if it kills me nsnndnndjd so , just thank you and i love you loads and i hope things will start to look better for you angel !!! have a nice night 💕💓💖💗💘💞💕💓💖💗💘💞💕💓💖💗💘💞

[hundredsunny]

op oc #3: APRIL

im baaaaaaack

u are about to read about my prime DAUGHTER april. the rogue princess. a real pokemon! hahahhahaha she nabbed herself the AURA AURA FRUIT yo this is wild so get ready to learn about ol’ blue eyes!!!!!!!!!!

NAME: april (i dont have a surname for her i cant think of anything and ive had her for 8 years im sorry) EPITHET: “aura shooter” ooOOoOOoOoo AGE: 18 (pre) 20 (post) BIRTHDAY: april (incredible would u have ever guessed) 5th!!!  BIRTHPLACE: nimbasa island in the south blue SEX: female HEIGHT: 5′6″ WEIGHT: 122lbs HAIR COLOR: sandy brown EYE COLOR: blue APPEARANCE: before she escaped her home, she wore an icy blue dress underneath a navy blue cloak and her hair down with a CROWN of course but she hated wearing it a lot. her hair when worn down reaches the middle of her biceps. after she escaped she ONLY wore her hair in a ponytail and she always wore a red bandanna with a white arch atop her head at all times!! it was a gift from her mamma the QUEEN herself. she also wore a white t-shirt with red triangles bordering the collar and the ends of her sleeves. does that make sense? i sure hope. she wore a red sash around her waist and then she popped on some black pants and boots. real piratey. also some of her hair kinda pops out in the front so theres a good chunk that sometimes covers her left side. look at u go princess. AFTER the timeskip she cut her hair so it reaches just above her shoulders, and instead of wearing her hair up and with the bandanna, she wears it down but with a black headband. her bandanna is tied around her left bicep (fashion inspo: zoro). she wears a green sleeveless crop top, and theres a scar that reaches from the back of her shoulder to the end of her collarbone. she earned that shit from her wild timeskip training. oof. shes ok. she wears light-washed pants and some addidas-lookin shoes lmao she also wears a rly loose belt too. also she has gold earrings and thas about it. her eyes are round and just v pretty and blue. her nose turns up at the end just a tad bit and it’s so cute she’s so cute. she has a dimple on the right side of her mouth. her mommas face :’) shes fairly skinny but after the timeskip she gained some muscles made 4 punching douchecanoes  REPRESENTATIVE SMELL: vanilla FAVE FOOD: pasta FAVE DRINK: lemonade  FAVE SEASON: fall REPRESENTATIVE NATIONALITY: australian BOUNTY: initial bounty was 60,000,000 (for being runaway royalty) but after dressrosa she SKRTED up to 155,000,000 DEVIL FRUIT: aura aura fruit a paramecia type. the fruit allows the user to manipulate their energy. with the aura aura fruit, users are able to detect the aura of others, repel the aura of others, and project their own. the power of aura is mood-sensitive and can change a lot. can u believe april is lucario 6 forms of aura: red is physical nature, orange is intelligence, yellow is sheer willpower, green is healing, blue is emotion, vioilet(i THINK) is mental communication. i forgot what i wrote down for the aura types lmaoooo the biggest drawback of this fruit is that the user can only use a limited amount at one time. another drawback is that they cant manipulate other people’s aura??? it’s rly hard to explain this but trust me it makes sense when it’s put into action i promise SKILLS SET: most of her attacks are used with red aura since it relates to physical nature. wild. “aura bullet” is just shootin aura goodbye. i love pokemon. lmao. uh “aura detect” is when she can see what someone else’s aura looks like, so basically she can determine if someone is a bastard or not before they even open their mouth. “aura clone” clones herself with aura and that takes a LOT of effort to pull this one off especially when she wants to use multiple clones. “aura bomb” yo this one is wild she uses it for diversions and escaping since it kinda acts as a smoke bomb but when she uses this thing in battle OOOOH BOY. “starstorm” ok this is like the “im going to die after i do this move” kinda thing. it combines all the damn types of aura and it just RAINS down on ppl. goodbye april. anyways there are more basic moves but i dont rly wanna get too into that rn im sorry PROFESSION: runaway princess lol CREW: straw hat pirates  PERSONALITY: an easygoing girl. v mellow for the most part but there are times where she can get pretty goofy (thanks jack). if the wrong buttons are pushed, she becomes a HURRICANE. she does have confidence issues but since she met luffy, she’s really started to overcome them. shes got a horrible habit of being sarcastic and also she asks a LOT of questions holy SHIT honey. she is TERRIFIED of heights so when franky lays down a good ol coup de burst, her soul leaves her body. g o o d b y e. she was very cold when she first met luffy and the gang bc she lived with the person who killed her mom AND jack left sooooo she was a little bitter. eventually she learned to rly live with the mugiwaras. when she first joined the crew, she was very shy and timid and tried hard to fit in. she was SO intimidated by zoro like he genuinely scared the fuck out of her so she always tried hard to not be a Fool around him but once she got comfortable with everyone she just had a good ol time. “hey grassy ass!! :))” “can u fucking not call me that”. she has the CUTEST laugh oh me oh my. honestly just a rly passionate gal, she just wants to be strong and be able to protect her pals. refuses outside help. bros out with luffy and usopp and chopper sometimes but also judges them from afar like nami does. it all just depends on the day. truly. i once wrote a series of one-shots where each one was an adventure that april had with one other straw hat. luffy was the first one, and THAT was wild. zoro’s was fucking baller. so on and so forth. rly shows off her dynamic with each member. april? shes honestly just a good person and im proud of her bc she works so hard  LIKES: training, traveling, every single animal ever, reading DISLIKES: heights, the marines, the heat, people who walk horrifically slow in crowded places WEAPON(S): aside from her devil fruit shes got a dagger she sometimes uses. jack gave one to her right before he left HISTORY: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO king jed and queen serena had a baby girl. APRIL. that made her the princess. anyways she grew up as any princess would--spoiled. however the spoiling never got to her head bc serena was so good about teaching her things like that. serena was a goddess i love her pls come back. serena was wildly popular with the citizens of the kingdom bc of her caring and friendly personality. she would always take april into the kingdom every day and pay visits to the citizens. out of all the citizens they paid visits to, the most common faces she saw were those of the solo family. cain was jed’s most talented and trusted knight. he and his wife celeste had 2 kids: jack and sho YO. jack was 7 yrs older than sho and 3 yrs older than april. april and jack became fast friends and often explored the kingdom together. regular kid stuff u know. jack’s mom was always like “jack NO u CANNOT take the PRINCESS to the farms thats FILTY” hahahah but they went anyway.  jed? a dark man. idk who hurt him or what made him so murderous. but. he was tired of serena treating the citizens like equals. he believed that royalty should be viewed as gods.  when april was 8 jed killed serena oh god there it is theres the tragic anime mom death. as soon as serena died, the dynamic of the kingdom instantly changed. soon after jed took total control, people began leaving the island. eventually, the island became so empty that only a handful of families remained. jed did not allow april to leave the castle at all, and with that rule, it damaged the friendship that she and jack had. ofc around that time jack’s dad ran off as well so he stopped tryin to visit her for a bit. but then once he got back into his groove hed sneak all about, avoiding the night patrols, and hed just sit outside of april’s window and talk to her.  when april was 11 she discovered a devil fruit hidden away in the trashed artifacts that belonged to her mother. she ate the devil fruit and was like “now im strong, fight me JED” but lol she got her ass whooped poor bby when april was 16 jack left the island, leaving her completely and utterly alone. the exposure to such loneliness began to change april into a more reserved, bitter person.  2 yrs later the STRAW HATS stumbled upon the island. at that time april had started a habit of sneaking out of the castle to roam the empty streets of nimbasa, but during one of her strolls, she encountered robin, franky, and brook. she ended up knocking them unconscious bc she felt threatened. the second group she met consisted of zoro, chopper, and sanji. they had been captured by guards and were brought into the throne room to be interrogated by jed. april was required to be there as well so she kinda sat in her throne and looked mad the entire time. sanji was like “NO WHY DOES SHE LOOK SO MAD SHE NEEDS TO BE HAPPY” and zoro was like “ive never seen someone so happy to see my face” and chopper was just having a crisis bc they were abt to be tossed into the shadow realm at the hands of the king. zoro got mouthy and jed didnt have none of that shit so he told april to kill zoro but she just knocked him out instead. that pissed jed off. THE NEXT person she met was luffy. she only met luffy bc he infiltrated a banquet thing by sitting underneath a cart. classic luffy. she didnt meet nami and usopp until WAAAAY later. yadda yadda yadda shit goes down (i wrote a whole arc for this. it’s called the princess and the pirates lmao original but yes i wrote an entire arc for her recruitment and it’s A Lot) ANYWAYS luffy asked her to join the crew but she declined at first bc she thought pirates were just like her father: power-hungry and murderous. however that obv changed when she was exposed to the straw hats more when luffy defeated jed who ate the ___ ___ fruit (tbh i forgot what fruit he ate im sorry) she KNEW she belonged with the straw hats. :’) she still be sailin with the legends. shes had some wild times obv. her arc comes a bit after thriller bark. woopie!!!!!!! like always, lemme know if u wanna know more about her!!!

[pacman-tattoo]

Hi! I have a headcanon request- how would Sincerely Three interact with their soulmates in the AU where whatever one person writes on themselves would show up on the other's skin? Thanks so much!

omg this is cute and u said soulmate au and im automatically in love

gonna put this under a readmore

also im assuming u mean x reader but if u want like, actual ship Sincerely Three (because i love them a lot tbh), just ask again and be like ‘tris ur dumb’

evan hansen

alright so u met evan once after u kept scribbling little notes to yourself like “work on english paper” and “buy more pens” 

eventually that stuff got smudged and u forgot until all of a sudden there was a “did you do your english paper?” in small, neat handwriting

:0

no, but thank you!

it basically becomes just little reminders to each other and then u just kinda realize

u dont even know ur soulmates name

so u introduce urself and evan responds back with his name and

its kind of familiar???

huh

where do u know this oven handsoap evan hansen

shrug

‘evan?’

‘h-here’

oh my god what the fuck he’s been in ur math class all year how the FUCK did you not notice

‘[y/n]?’

‘uh, here’

evan and u make eye contact because wait.

‘it u’

after class u two introduce urselves to each other formally tbh

jareds jealous btw because wow evan found his soulmate wtf

evan sometimes scribbles on his arm sometime to remember stuff

sometimes u doodle on urself and evan finds it cute like, no matter how good or bad it is??

imagine like

in the future

moving in together

sometimes u go grocery shopping and u just have evans neat lil handwriting on ur arm of everything u need to get

sometimes u get lil ‘i love you’s on ur arm after a while??? and its rly sweet??? bless

evan tends to write in blue ink btw

usually light blue if he can but dark/regular blue ink is also fine

u caught him once doodling a tree on his arm.

why was he doodling a tree? heck if u know

u just caught the tree on ur arm and ur like ‘fuck thats adorable’

jared kleinman

u and jared probably met when u two were like, 13, since jared was probably drawing on himself or some shit and u were like ‘kleinman i fucking see u, stop drawing dicks’

he snorted a lil and then had to pretend he wasnt doing shit when ppl looked his way

13 year old boys tho, guys gals n nonbinary pals.

u two probably clicked pretty quickly

u dont end up dating until like, sophomore year tbh

but after that u two are inseparable

“charge ur phone, idiot”

“shut up kleinman”

“love u”

“love u too dumbass”

jared would 100% be the person who would just start writing on himself and then he sees ur not replying so he just texts u 

“write back”

he has drawn at least one (1) meme on himself

just

u fuckin look down and theres a fucking meme on ur arm

“jared im gonna fucking kill u”

ok but just casual little messages to each other

ur going over to jareds? u get a note on ur arm thats basically “get more gummy bears” or some shit

evan just watches u and jared furiously writing on urselves

what are u two even saying

he doesn’t know

he just knows that u two go through pens rly quickly

everyone knows

u two go to the store and argue about what color pens u wanna buy

playing lil games like hangman on urselves tho

connor murphy

can i just link maia’s soulmate au because nothing i say can top it because its a really realyl fucking beautiful piece of writing and i love it a lot and y’all should read it. heck, ask me and i’ll link u to it and her account if u dont know her already (she’s on hiatus as of rn i believe but her writing is

no? okay

so connor strikes me as the kind of person who just draws on himself because paying attention??? no

who pays attention anymore

not connor

so u just get doodles. so many doodles.

u dont rly mind

its cool

connors surprised that he has a soulmate bc eventually u write back a ‘i like ur art’

connor’s actually in ur english class.  which is the only class he doesn’t doodle on himself

ok do urself a favor and stop reading and go read maia’s soulmate au because its a thousand times better than anything i can come up with

thank u

dumb 3 am talks

dumb reminders to each other

dumb doodles 

u write little reminders to him a lot more than he does u

ok but seriously go read maia’s soulmate au because its perfect

heck

ask me

and i will straight up link it to u

bonus! all three ;)

so one day u notice theres writing on your hand. it’s a little smudged and it’s basically like “ask mom for refill on pills” or something small like that and ur like ‘huh’

u dont write back to that specific one at first but later u looked at ur hand and saw that whatever ink the person had been using is much more smudged and ur like ‘huh i wonder if they ever got their meds’

so u write down ur forearm asking

immediately theres a ‘what? i dont take meds’ in very quick, neat handwriting

and ur just like ?? before theres… more handwriting that actually matches the question from earlier

‘no, i didn’t! thank you’

‘wait evan what the fuck’

‘that wasnt you?’

‘no’

‘or connor?’

… evan??? connor????

theres a brief period where no one writes anything

then all of a sudden u get a “so who the fuck are u”

“[y/n]”

ok.

yall kind of assign ink colors just so u all know whos writing what sometimes

like, yeah handwriting but its easier just to know ‘oh, connor is trying to say something’ bc theres purple ink on ur arm

connor is purple, jared is green, evan is blue

ur ink tends to be red

dumb writing at 2 am

its mainly between u and connor and sometimes jared

but sometimes evan writes

usually he’s asleep tho

why dont u kids text

for the au.

thats the only reason

its basically chaos

u… actually live away from them and one weekend ur like ’fuck it, im driving out to meet these losers’

so u tell em

holy shit ur coming to meet them

:0 so they offer to meet u somewhere???

a la mode

best ice cream 

bless

so u punch it into google maps and an hour later u see like

three fucking nerds standing around outside

ur sitting in ur car

so u just write

‘hey fuckfaces’

they just

all look around like ‘wtf’

u get out of the car

formal introductions

they’re all???? cute??? is this fuckn legal

they… look like how they write?

does that make sense

like. evan’s handwriting is small and neat and kinda smudgy at times - and he just… looks like a nervous bean to you. jared’s is quick and sloppy and ends up taking more space than a paragraph from connor does - and jared looks like the sort of dude full of personality. connor’s handwriting is small and runs together and kinda unreadable sometimes and it just

they look like how they write

its weird idk

u all end up getting ice cream and talking

finally u guys actually like

exchange numbers

since u keep getting shit about ink poisoning

so sometimes u will drive out to see these dorks

what kind of luck did u have that you ended up only a town away tbh

uh

general headcanons

warmest cuddle sessions

dumb notes to each other

includes memes

‘jared just text it-’ ‘no’

u just get ‘come visit us u fuck’ on ur arm once

writing on urselves when ur all int he same room

and literally sitting right next to each other

zoe walked in and she’s just like ‘… okay.’

u have a bad day? u take a nap

u wake up and theres a lot of just lil lovely things written on ur arms???

sweet dorks

(and at least 1 meme)

(because theres always 1 meme)

thats all i got

[witchofdoom]

can i have 14 for auralia, 1 for chi and can i also like drop the bomb completely and do 8 for ama

Them in an uncomfortable outfit

P a n t s. (God what’s up w/ my ocs and hating pants)

It feels weird having fabric just. SURROUNDING her legs and making it so hard to shift vs like a dress or skirt. Pants in general just feel super restricting too?? Since ~under the sea~ clothing isn’t really a thing since it just gets wet so the more fabric the worse it is minus on the arms. But even then she doesn’t like the longer sleeves either? Mostly tight ones just....get off my skin blease.

Them as a child

I LOVE THAT U SENT THIS FOR HER AFTER I GOT IT FOR AMA JUST....THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE END OF THE SAME BAD HOUSE.....

Chi has always been a go getter, even without the guise of her parents she loves the praise and competition. Not as stoic as she is as a teen/adult tho she would be enthusiastic about new things and learning and just planning so many things for the future...

She was definitely a model student and someone a lot of people looked up and went to for help. She was a bit cold to people but more in the sense of just being blunt with her words. Tho maybe that added to her ~Cool and Collected Senpai~ vibe

But of course with the ever so much a piece of shit bad dad her enthusiasm turned more into doing it for the sake of doing it/being a chore? Like she still liked the praise, still liked pushing herself, still liked learning but when only the best of the best was expected of you it just became....annoying. But she would never dare to say that or go against wishes of her parents because they were her family they were her guardians they were the ones who taught her and raised her they were in the right!!! Right? And. TERRIBLE AS IT IS seeing Ama be more compromised with what their dad wants kind of placed a fear in her to not falter...

Weird thing to mention after that but she enjoyed sports a lot too!! She was in track in her middle school years + some stuff on the side for fun and joined her high school’s gal basketball team when she moved. Ofc she left this behind for the sake of LAW but she’s always been athletic as a kiddo.

Their interactions with their significant other(s), if they have them

Holy shit I. THIS IS REVENGE FOR MY ASK H U H. Alright this is gonna be a long one...

Maybe not rly super on topic but? To start off this long train of rambling to say that. Ama sees Meti as a knight in shining armor is an understatement??? Like even saying he’s that AND her prince charming is not even close to how much he means to her like....in the weirdest of wording he’s just her snuggle bunny....like he’s him and she loves him and u ever think abt someone u love so much u cry that’s her 24/7 probably.

EARLY ON in their relationship/knowing each other in general was?? Awkward. You got shouty mcfight guy and I’m crying on the inside anxiety incarnate but it oddly??? Worked out?? Like maybe it was because shared interests??? Maybe it was how opposite their personalities were they ended up balancing each other out??? Or just how strange their first meeting was??? Maybe how (even if the methods weren’t. SOMETHING SHE CONDONED) she kinda admired people who didn’t take shit or confident??? or even something more!! (Or. something that needs to be specified/worked on more since it was like 6 years ago and stuff changed om g) But it was basically just these two, honestly very broken people coming together to create something new and fix all the cracks in each other along the way, despite neither of them really knowing that they were there to begin with? Or how deep the damages were.

LIKE AS MENTIONED BEFORE Ama was. Not a very social person?? And failed with the interactions that came with it pretty often like hell their first meeting she was probably quiet for 75% of it....And hell even as friends she was super quiet but like she cares for ppl so much it still kinda showed just from her expressions and actions and the few words she DID say. Quiet mom friend. She liked being around him a lot??? Like ofc she enjoyed the company of the rest of the friend group but just....even the simplest of things they did together?? The stupidest of conversations (or i/g early on more like him rambling since...tfw super quiet and also the added fear of not knowing a language 100% and accent) and just him (u kno when he wasn’t. KINDA PUTTING HIMSELF IN DANGER) made her heart go doki doki....Despite her denying and denying like no wtf ur horrible u don’t DESERVE to have friends or even a crush :/// thinking that like he’s gonna like u back smfh :////

After knowing him (+ friends) for a bit she did become a little bit more open?? Like in the friend way tho like she still hid her issues like hell. It was like before where she was empathetic to everyone and stuff just a little more friendly...still like ummmm EVEN IF THEY LIKE U NOBODY (meti) WOULD EVER LOVE U. She did kinda hold back bc of that just umm u wanna lose a FRIEND too u fuck???? (This. Stupid summer child.....u fool....) Once they got together tho she was actually kinda?? The same as before but instead of ummm it was more like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA///

I think this came?? A little bit after getting together but weird thing w/ Ama is that the closer u are to her the more she’ll actually speak up about things? Like her concern for you grows and she’ll put more of her own issues to stop u from doing fuck shit. So like she was still super caring and sweet but then the Mom Friend Attitude(tm) got mixed in a bit with that since. GESTURES TO METI, WHO FOUGHT PEOPLE JUST BECAUSE. And that probably kinda. opened pantrauma’s box of hell after a while of ‘ur gonna get hurt stop!!!’ just.....‘SOME PEOPLE??? FIGHT PEOPLE TO COPE???’ ‘wait what are u coping for-’ like that kinda showed that?? They trust each other enough to actually talk about this stuff despite not really realizing that?? Like...maybe not the root of the issues but maybe the mentality that lead to it and the start of healing for him?? Like she’s always been empathetic but it was something really new to just....see someone she cared about so much be like this and just wanting to help him....THO SHE HERSELF WAS STILL KINDA CLOSED OFF ABOUT HER OWN ISSUES AND TRIED TO HIDE THEM SINCE SHE DIDN'T WANT HIM TO WORRY AMA WHY...LIKE THIS IS STILL A THING EVEN IF WAY LESS...that sweet sweet abuse trauma I guess. She gets better with later years tho like with her feelings and even trauma at least but u h sweats at the medical issues that’s another story //horrayplz

Tries to....stay more vague tho bc this is getting long but like for the majority/still now she’s always been kinda dotting?? Like maybe not in a mom way now bc that’s weird but like in a spouse kinda way where she just wants him to be happy and safe and she def has gotten way better with speaking and is way more open about her concerns/feelings for him?? Like again with the balancing thing sorta she’s there to hold things back to make sure they don’t explode vs him who protects and maybe has things blow up just a little bit so it’s not brushed under the rug when something upsets her and will cause issues since she’s still super passive to things...But like her concerns come from nothing but a good place and just absolute pure love for him?

Also in terms of like affections she does like. Hold back a bit despite REALLY LOVING IT?? Like tbh it’s kinda rare for her to initiate stuff besides like hugs/hand holding/leaning against him and sometimes cuddling?? Morning/Goodbye/Goodnight kisses are smthing she’s more okay with doing too since it’s just quick and sweet and u don’t usually give a second thought to those....Even then she’s still so easily embarrassed like Ama blease you’ve been together for 6 years and in main verse ur married!!! Also god just in general she just....likes being near him or sitting next to him or laying against him and all that good stuff like her cheeks still kinda go redder than usual (bc fun fact!!! Ama’s cheeks are actually naturally rosy.) but it helps her relax and she feels so safe...HENCE THE WHOLE KNIGHT THING AT THE BEGINNING....

tl;dr bc god knows ppl need it: Ama just....loves Meti a lot. She cares about him so much and it’s a case of these two broken and lost people finding each other in such a cruel world and coming together to help fix each other while making something new along the way. She feels safe with him, she feels at home with him, she feels happy with him. He’s not her knight in shining armor, he’s not her prince charming, he’s not even her soul mate....he’s so much more than that he’s her snuggle bunny.

[detective-prince-bluebottle]

tagged by @agatharja

first rule: tag 9 people you want to get to know better! You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to! :)

... my anxiety won’t let me tag anyone because i’m afraid i’d be bothering them

second rule: Bold statements that are true

- I am 5'7 or taller (i fucking wiiiiiiiiiiiiiish)

- I wear glasses (i’m meant to but i don’t because they get dirty and that bothers me)

-I have at least one tattoo

- I have at least one piercing (6 distributed around my ears and 1 nose)

- I have blonde hair

- I have brown eyes

- I have short hair (hells yeah boi)

- My abs are at least somewhat defined (bitch i wish, fuck off)

- I have or had braces

PERSONALITY:

- I love meeting new people

- People tell me I am funny (ppl tell me nothing. also i never speak out loud)

- Helping others with their problems is a big priority of mine (i mean i’d like to but i have no idea what to say)

- I enjoy physical challenges

- I enjoy mental challenges

- I am playfully rude to people I know (i mean kinda sometimes? idk)

- I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it 

- There is something I would change about my personality (everything i would love to not be a bland robot)

ABILITY:

- I can sing well

- I can play an instrument (i can sort of play ukulele and guitar. and ocarina i guess lol. i also took recorder lessons when i was in primary school. now that was a bad time)

- I can do over 30 pushups without stopping (lol no)

- I am a fast runner (actually i can sprint really fast but for only like 10 seconds)

- I can draw well

- I have a good memory (HAHAHAHAHA NO)

- I am good at doing math in my head

- I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute (i used to when i was like a teen but my asthma and stuff has gotten real bad since then)

- I have beaten at least 2 people arm wrestling (idk probably i mean see aforementioned unbolded good memory i can’t even remember two days ago at all i must have beaten 2 people at arm wrestling. i mean i know i’ve wrestled the arm)

- I can make at least 3 recipes from scratch

- I know how to throw a proper punch (well i mean i can do a karate punch. you start with your fist closed and facing up, held next to like your hip and your elbow’s like pointed back, and then you thrust forward and up a bit and twist your fist down inwards, so you end up with it at chest level. idk)

HOBBIES:

- I enjoy sports (i feel like eventually i will end up watching something like women’s soccer or women’s basketball, because i am a pathetic virginal gay that can’t talk to and is unattractive to girls)

- I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else (i tried out for soccer twice. since i’m a fatass they didn’t go well)

- I’m in a orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else (i was in primary school i have no idea why i think it’s cuz my grandma wanted me to be? but it wasn’t all bad i mean one time we went to like a choir competition and the conductor called me a boy so that was neat as fuck. man i got called a boy a lot when i was a kid it was fucking heaven compared to now, assholes calling me ma’am and shit man get fuckt)

- I have learned a new song in the past week (what does this mean? like to play on an instrument? bitch i can’t even concentrate long enough to learn Honeybee by Steam Powered Giraffe i just get discouraged and shit)

- I exercise at least once a week (listen i intend to rectify this and go swimming every day, now that i finally realised like last year that i actually have fucking dysphoria and that’s why i hated wearing swimsuits (aside from because i’m fat as shit and disgusting to witness in a fucking onepiece like what the fuck were my parents fucking thinking making me wear shit like that when i’m obese as sin) i’m gonna get board shorts and a rashguard and wear one of my less liked binders and it’ll be so fucking good)

- I have gone for runs at least once a week in warmer months (fuck off i’m not leaving my house in fucking summer it’s fucking 40°)

- I have drawn something in the past month

- I enjoy writing (man i haven’t properly written in like 7 years because idk depression but i still write stories in my head when i’m going to sleep at night and showering and whatever)

- Fandoms are my #1 priority

- I do some form of Martial arts (i used to do karate when i was uhhh 14?)

EXPERIENCES:

- I have had my first kiss (hahahahaha *sob* i fucking wish)

- I have had alcohol (yeah man i love jagerbombs and blue lagoons, defuckinglicious)

- I have scored a winning point in a sport (fuck sports)

- I have watched an entire TV series in one sitting (okay wait does this count for like rewatches? because when i saw my first anime i was obsessed with watching it - martian successor nadesico btw - for the entire day and that’s all i did, i sat in bed and watched it all morning to night)

- I have been at an overnight event (i meannnn when i went to see the last jedi slash meet some of my friends from my guild irl for the first time i stayed over at their house on the sofa and left the next morning does that count)

- I have been in a taxi (yeah it was only recently actually, our car fucking died and we had to take some convoluted fucking public transport out of our place from middle-of-dead-ass-fucking-nowhere-ville (needless to say i hate the suburb i live in. and country) to somewhere where we could get a taxi to a car rental place. or was it a dealership? i can’t fucking remember man do you see this shitty memory in action?? it was only like 2 years ago fuck me)

- I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year (well i was IN a hospital but that’s because i was going to a dental clinic in the building)

- I have beaten a video game in one day (what game can you beat in a day man???)

- I have visited another country (i haven’t got enough fucking money lad)

- I have been to one of my favorite bands’ concerts (listen fuck you i’m totally counting livestreamed concerts, i’ve seen all of Steam Powered Giraffe’s youtube concerts and the one recorded in 2013 and you bet your ass i’m gonna pay $20 for the right to see the film of the anniversary concert)

MY LIFE:

- I have one person that I consider to be my Best Friend (i kinda consider my friend bunny my best friend but i doubt he considers me his bestie)

- I live close to my school/work (HAHAHA GET REKT I TAKE MY UNI COURSES ONLINE AHAHAHA)

- My parents are still together

- I have at least one sibling (i mean technically i have 3 but i’ve never met them. at least i don’t think i have. they can get lost far as i’m concerned)

- I live in the United States (i wouldn’t live there if you paid me. maybe if obama were still president you could’ve got me to live there if you gave me like 5 million dollars, but now i would actually rather die)

- There is snow where I live right now (god i would fucking kill for some snow)

- I have hung out with a friend in the past month (yooo i was boutta unbold this because i have no fuckin friends except my online pals but then i remembered going to meet two of my friends from online and seeing star wars with them!! holy shit i feel validated and less lonely)

- I have a smartphone (samsung galaxy s6 BOI i am so fucking angry i was gonna hold out for the s7 cuz 7 is my second favourite fucking number (first is 14 but i wasn’t gonna wait a decade for that or w/e) anyway i finally decided to just get the s6 and the fucker asshole 7 is announced like a month later aaaaaarhghdks)

- I own at least 15 CDs (i have a whole fuck ton of videogames and they’re on CDs get owned HAHA FOILED but i also have probably about 15 CDs of music if i’m gonna count the stuff my family has)

- I share my room with someone (man my room isn’t even big enough for me how you gonna fit a whole nother person in that cupboard)

RELATIONSHIPS:

- I am in a Relationship (*cries uncontrollably*)

- I have a crush on a celebrity (well i mean i wouldn’t say no to like scarlett johansson if she told me she wanted to rail me. or gal gadot. or kate beckinsale. or kristen stewart. or - okay this is probably a massive list of ladies i want to rawdog me)

- I have a crush on someone I know (i’m slightly in love with all of my female friends because they show me kindness)

- I’ve been in at least 3 relationships (alright fucking buckle up kids: i don’t count online relationships because i’m a bitter person but when i was like 10 i was in a ‘relationship’ on runescape with a boy the same age at me and i legitimately think it was actually a kid like me and not a predator because all we did was stand next to each other and talk about cows or something and make the avatars kiss (we both had male avatars because i was obviously subconsciously aware of my gender identity at that stage). when i was like 13/14 i met a girl at a camp during the school holidays (i went to camp almost every holiday) and we chatted over msn after camp ended and tbh i think she forgot who i was because she suddenly said she liked me one day so i decided i liked her too and we started to ‘date’. lasted like 2 weeks? idk but she broke it off cuz i was inattentive (i can’t remember but i guess i could’ve been i’m not a very social person believe it or not *snicker*) anyway i saw her at the next two camps and it was hella fucking awkward the first time because i wanted to be friends with her but her other friends intimidated me so i just hovered around her creepily and she got angry at me and i got sad, but the 2nd time was a lot better i think, i was extremely distressed when i saw her at the bus station for the camp transport and i sulked the entire ride, but when we all got there i accidentally fell into her friend group (i actually think it’s because the other girls were really nice and they’d seen me sulking and wanted to cheer me up, man kinda fucked up huh) i pretty much ignored her the whole time and after camp ended she contacted me on msn for some reason and idk she like asked me how i’d felt when i saw her at camp and i was honest and told her i’d been pretty upset and then she got pissed at me and never spoke to me again. wow such drama huh? oh and my 3rd ‘relationship’ was when i was uhh 16/17-ish with this girl i met on some naruto fansite. i don’t even like naruto, and i actually remember absolutely nothing about my interactions with her. like at all. i don’t remember how we met or who dumped who or whatever bullshit. i’m not sure why this is i mean maybe it’s because this was at the same time i had a massive fucking obsessive infatuation with a girl at my school and well it didn’t turn out so hot and i think i’ve blocked out a lot of shit. anyway i hope you all enjoyed that wall of text haha of course you fucking didn’t. well tough titties me lad)

- I have never been in a relationship (*cries*)

- I have admitted my feelings to a crush (fuck no holy shit)

- I get crushes easily (yeah well if any female is nice to me i’m a goner. also one time during high school i started getting crushes on all the girls in my extended english class like i think it was a new girl each week. it was a tiny class there was only like 8 of us, no stinky boys (even if i’d realised i was trans at the time, i’m not stinky :P))

- I have had a crush for over a year (it was not fun)

- I have been in a relationship for over a year

- I have had feelings for a friend (do semi acquaintances count. or ‘girls that tolerated me enough to let me sit with them at lunch’)

RANDOM:

- I have break-danced

- I know a person named Jamie

- I have had a teacher that has a name that is hard to pronounce (listen i don’t fucking remember. but i’m good at pronunciations and shit anyway)

- I have dyed my hair (it was really short and blonde i kinda looked like a skinhead)

- I’m listening to a song on repeat right now (tongue tied from red dwarf)

- I have punched someone in the past week

- I know someone who has gone to jail

- I have broken a bone (broke my ankle in primary school because i’m fat and dumb and tried to slide along the grass into the safezone during tag or whatever, also i broke my wrist when i was 18 because i’m fat and dumb and i was learning how to drive a scooter but i went around a corner too slow or idk unbalanced or some shit, i think i broke the mirror on it but fuck that infernal machine i had to get fucking surgery and get pins in my wrist. when i got them out it was actually the closest i’ve ever come to fainting like the doctor dude was straining hard to pull these ones on the side out and when they finally popped out and a ton of blood gushed out i like deflated and teetered in my seat a bit it was an experience)

- I have eaten a waffle today (never had a waffle)

- I know what I want to do in life (well idk about an actual career but i want to write a book and get it published and make tons of bank)

- I speak at least two languages (i took japanese for 6 years don’t fucking tell me that doesn’t count just because i can’t carry a conversation in the language. also i took a class on latin for a semester it was dope af)

- I have made a new friend in the past year

[livingasaghost]

hi so it’s late and katie’s snoring (love uuuu) 

and thus i was scrolling insta and saw someone post about their birthday and it made me think about birthdays again. like all my friends and i are trying to define what a fun adult bday celebration would be (aside from what society says - getting drunk) and i just don’t know what i want. not to be a narcissist like “oh man i need ppl to celebrate me” but like in all honesty my birthdays are always either hella lame, or i’m doing things i really don’t wanna be doing (ie finals, a funeral, photoshoots for other ppl) like literally early may is always so busy that i just end up being alone or awkwardly hanging out with like two friends. one year in hs my best friend decorated my locker and that was special. once in college i got a cake AND all my suitemates made me cute cards and got me chocolate. and then last year was *fine* like i got to see my main college friends and eat strawberry cake and read a new book, but like...the day before i literally went to a funeral...and so many ppl bailed on my actual bday dinner bc of finals and life and like, as much as my 3 friends made me feel loved, i also just felt like the real friend i am - the friend who gets cancelled on bc i like cancelled plans and bc i am chill and loyal and forgiving. like dammit im cool! and fun! and yall should treasure me! like the past two years were both spent in this house with roommates just hanging out and it’s so SAD - more than that i just felt like i only had a handful of true friends. hence why this year (as with most years) i’m like I NEED A BIG THING TO BE HAPPY! which isnt true - when i turned 14 i had the biggest party of my life which was like at least 15 ppl at my house (i made them do a talent show just so i could show off my guitar/songwriting skills bc im a pretentious asshole oh my god i hate myself). but like what i really want is to be with people and take cute photos together and feel pretty and confident and grown up and i wanna just like have FUN ya know?

so anyway i was sitting here thinking up my ideas for may and they’re as follows:

go see infinity war - mainly i just want ppl to go see it with me so im not alone but like tbh i’ll go see it alone anyway so that’s probably not a great option

scavenger hunt at mckays - jacque brought this up and it’d but such a FUN thing to do, to just make everyone go search for weird stuff at the big media store like UGH straight out of a book am i right

the classic bday dinner - id force everyone to go to cheesecake factory and eat with me and just have a nice chat but like big dinners can be hella stressful and we alllll know i hate being the guest of honor oh god i wanna die already make it stop

friend photoshoot?? - like i said above all i really want are cute photos so like maybe i should just take all my favorite gals and dress up real cute and make amy help take photos of everyone with me like WOW didnt carmen or christine do that sometime THAT is my dream tbh

like maybe we do a combo of those things - have a shoot at sunset and then go scavenge for stuff idk THAT JUST SOUNDS SO NICE

i’d probably want to do it on that weekend tho since my bday is on a wednesday 🤔

ANYWAY i love bdays i just wish mine was more exciting and cute

katie’s still snoring it’s been like 30 minutes yeet

[noncompliant-fuckery]

You wanna do those questions? :)

A billion years later.. 😜1: Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie.Idk I have a lot of favorites. Debs is a favorite and I remember renting it from the movie store and watching it with my sister. Poor little me didn't realize I was gonna be like the main characters one day (aka gay af) 2: Talk about your first kiss.Well, first cheek kiss was in music class in middle school while watching pride and prejudice. It was fast and sudden cause I asked him earlier that day why we hadn't kissed yet and he stepped up and did it right there. Can't remember the first lip kiss but my first French kiss was unfortunately in front of his older brother cause we wanted tips on how to do it right and considering how shy I really was back then it was awkward ah lol3: Talk about the person you've had the most intense romantic feelings for.Well the first one was a few years back I was talking to this one girl on here from the UK. She was basically the first girl to say she liked me back. Became extremely whipped for a bit. Was working up the nerve to see if we could be more but I waited too long and she randomly stopped talking to me. She messaged me months later out the blue that she had a girlfriend now and had to be friends. Was pissed at her cause she didn't have to ditch me just cause she had a gf, she could have told me and I would have switched gears cause we generally just flirted a lot. Anyways, I drifted from her cause we stopped talking for too long and wasn't in it anymore. Honestly tho our conversations were always a bit shit but I was making it work all that time considering I liked her. Her relationship only lasted 3 months. And yes I kept tabs back then lol4: Talk about the thing you regret most so far.Falling that hard for a girl I barely knew was a regret. I regret giving up gymnastics because it got hard too. I regret graduating high school early because I missed out on stuff that happened that last semester. I regret how I felt about myself years ago because I had no reason to. I regret being so shy and letting it hold me back from things I want. I've got a lot of regrets unfortunately and I know life is too short for that shit but I still feel that way. Life moves on tho. 5: Talk about the best birthday you've had.Last year my sister picked me up from college and took me to the mall and to Dave and busters and I played games and shit. That was fun and I want to do that same thing next year :) 6: Talk about the worst birthday you've had.Usually on my birthday growing up my family tends to always be broke so I'd often not do anything for my actual birthday. I'd have to wait till my sister's the next month to really celebrate and by then it's not really my birthday anymore, it's hers. 7: Talk about your biggest insecurity.Rather not. It's lame. 8: Talk about the thing you are most proud of.I'm quite proud of making the Dean's list last year. It's like making the honor roll but the college version. Goal is to make it again but we'll see :) 9: Talk about little things on your body that you like the most.I've got moles everywhere but the ones on my face are my favorite cause it's a family trait on my dads side to have them there. I also like my collar bone and for some reason I like my forearms which is why I want tattoos there but can't :/10: Talk about the biggest fight you've ever had.There was one with my sister years ago but I don't remember what it was about. Just know I was pissed and I stopped talking to her for a few days. 11: Talk about the best dream you've ever had.You already know I dream a lot. I think I told you that I'm waiting for my death before I say which is my favorite dream but I guess a dream that's ONE of the best is one where I was just flying around. I've practically mastered that skill in dreaming so I'm always doing it and one dream there was no plot or anything so I just flew around this world I created just enjoying the freedom I had in my head it was awesome :) 12: Talk about the worst dream you've ever had.I keep having this recurring dream where I'm in a building and I'm hiding and trying to get out. I climb through vents and small places and the small places sometimes get smaller and harder to move through. I believe I'm being chased in it. Idk I hate that dream currently. 13: Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time.I imagine it being awkward as hell.. Not sure what the hell to expect really. 14: Talk about a vacation.Last week I drove 20 hours to Florida with 10 ppl which includes 3 little boys that were 8,7 and 4 years old. They were bad ah and got whoopins like every day. First morning in the house I jumped awake to someone screaming “nooo!” thought someone died in their sleep cause the ride there was too much...it was only one of the boys about to get it by there parents. I learned that I'm not a fan of my mom's mom. She's annoying to watch movies with always narrating shit like we ain't watching the same thing! And she called herself trying to get to know me by coming to sit really close to me and grabbing my hand and holding it and rubbing it and asking me personal questions and then getting mad when I don't look her in the eyes. Like bitch first of all your too fucking close! And secondly I fucking hate eye contact especially if i do not know you like that. Let's not mention when we went to her house and out of all the pictures she had up of her grandkids and kids. Me and my sister and my mom were not among them despite my parents saying they gave her plenty school pictures -.- the ride home was bullshit too. Too much church talk. But I did get to swim in the pool and that was really fun. Had bought a new swimsuit and I got complimented on my figure by my aunt and older cousin(after that I was quite feeling myself) and I bonded with my oldest little cousin Joey(8yrs old) there. Was trying to teach him how not to get his ass beat by his father everyday if he just fucking listen when someone says stop. I also cracked my phone screen again while I was there 😶… 🏃🏃🏃🏃15: Talk about the time you were most content in life.I believe that was before I beat the other sperm to the egg.. I didn't know better…  But idk, I was content when I was in gymnastics even when I was just self teaching myself. That was fun. 16: Talk about the best party you've ever been to.Is a concert a party cause that was the first time I let loose like that and that was awesome :) 17: Talk about someone you want to be friends with.I want to be friends with Gal Gadot cause I want her to do her touch thing with me so I can be a whipped as bitch for the rest of my sad fucking life… 18: Talk about something that happened in elementary school.A girl named Patience (the bitch) cut one of my braids. This was 5th grade and I had weave in it so it wasn't my hair exactly that she cut but still, my parents paid money for that shit and that was fucked up. I went to the principal on her. Can't remember what happened next tho. 19: Talk about something that happened in middle school.I discovered I like girls one morning cause I found myself looking at a girls ass as I was walking up some stairs. I also had a lot of friend drama. 20: Talk about something that happened in high school.I emailed a teacher a month after I graduated high school to ask if I could put her down as a reference for work and I asked if she remembered me and she said she did and that I was her teacher's assistant. The truth is I wasn't her TA, my friend was and the teacher told me once that she didn't like her as her ta cause she never showed up. I didn't correct her about me being a ta cause I wanted to put that on my resume lol21: Talk about a time you had to turn someone down.Lol like ppl actually like me enough for me to get the chance to do that. 22: Talk about your worst fear.Fucking spiders. Fucking death, fucking losing ppl I love and care about. Fucking life. Also I think possibly heights. 23: Talk about a time someone turned you down.Its always so fun to be let down. But it's whatever and I move on. 24: Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot.My cousin told me to basically unhinged and get out there in the world. I'm working on it. 25: Talk about an ex-best friend.She was kind of a shit friend to me. Always getting annoyed with me and finding a reason to stop talking to me for months. Now on Facebook she said nigga a lot and she's not black. Thinking about unfriending her. Not like we talk anymore. 26: Talk about things you do when you're sick.I sleep if I can. I rub on shit tons of vics. I drink extra cough medicine. I complain a lot for sympathy 😊27: Talk about your favorite part of someone else's body.Its weird but I like playing with ppls elbow skin. It's like silly putty, so loose, so wiggly 😁 lol Unfortunately no one likes when I play with theirs… 😔😒28: Talk about your fetishes.Don't want to claim a fetish until I have more experience. 29: Talk about what turns you on.Honesty it doesn't take much to turn me on. I crave far too much attention for something not to turn me on. But really, pet names are a thing for me but like not super cheesy ones. 30: Talk about what turns you off.When ppl are dicks and just unappealing to me. 31: Talk about what you think death is like.Very scary.. Maybe a little painful. I worry about what happens to my inner voice. Like….me. Sucks when you don't have a true belief in any religion so you don't have the comfort of their beliefs of the afterlife. At this point I pull from all religions and have a belief in reincarnation, a little bit in ghosts and a odd belief in continuing life in another world after this. Blame that one on syfy television. 32: Talk about a place you remember from your childhood.Across the street from my childhood home was a park and beyond that was a downward hill with a field and a pack of trees and beyond that was another downward hill with a patch of trees and a sewer and a maze we made from tall grass. I loved that spot. It was everything a child could ever want in a hide out. One time the older kids made a fire and we ate sausages down there. Good times. 33: Talk about what you do when you are sad.Watch TV or vent to you. 34: Talk about the worst physical pain you've endured.When I sprained my neck and back and my mom drove me to the hospital on the most jacked up roads ever. Every bump hurt like hell. Mom was way to drugged up on her meds that she tried to take me to a regular clinic that didn't have an x-ray machine until I called my dad to update him and he said to take me to the actual hospital.. That day kind of sucked and I couldn't do gymnastics for like a month :/35: Talk about things you wish you could stop doing.I wish I could stop giving up on everything. 36: Talk about your guilty pleasures.I love watching game walkthroughs and napping and let's face it, masterbation 👌37: Talk about someone you thought you were in love with.The UK chick was a dud, moving on. 38: Talk about songs that remind you of certain people.I'm sorry I'm just currently too lazy to figure that out lol39: Talk about things you wish you'd known earlier.I wish I knew that I did not need to be that self conscious as a kid. I would have been happier. 40: Talk about the end of something in your life.Idk, when I graduated early from high school it was anticlimactic. I wasn't in the process of going to college yet so I had no forward movement. I was just done with high school and that was it. Had no job and basically no friends (was still getting to know you at the time tho) shit was lame.