#and the same goes for tom to fire and the beating sun

[tommarvoloriddlesdiary]

Harry was like the dark rain at the end of summer.

He rolled in like storm clouds on the horizon, a bright blue sky that faded slowly, then all at once to a dull dark grey. Harry walked into every room with a shade around him, dimming all the lights until he was the brightest source—a flash in the darkest dark—twisting, jagged just like that scar across his forehead.

Tom knew it the minute he laid his eyes on him, the moment that smell of ozone crept by, wafting and humid, sticking to him like a second skin.

[t-o-m-hollands]

Summary: It’s the late summer of 2004. You are set to travel across the country for university and your best friend Tom is staying behind. You spend your last night together before you leave. 

Themes: Friends to lovers, love confessions, first love. 

Warnings: Drinking beer. One mention of smoking weed. Mentions of parents fighting and also implied neglectful parents. Smut (+18), two spanks?? otherwise pretty tame.  

Word count: 3,4 k

Notes: I don’t know, this might be a bit different? Or it might just feel that way to me. It’s very reminiscent of teenage years and first love and nostalgia. Please let me know your thoughts, I’m genuinely not sure what to think about this one. 

Massive thank you to @augustholland​ who read through it and very kindly reassured me that it wasn’t bad 💖

Also, this fic was inspired by the Phoebe Bridgers song. I’ve never actually listened to it but it keeps showing up in my recommendation and i like the title of it so this is what i imagine that song is about. Mostly I listened to Harry Styles - Fine Line while writing this.

You finish up early that afternoon. Wayne, your old boss, tries not to cry as he hugs you goodbye. He tells you to take care in a gravelly voice close to breaking, as he avoids looking at you. It’s your last shift in the greasy bar, where for the last two years you’ve been selling cheap beer and watered down whiskey to weary old men and rowdy students who come in for a game of pool. It hasn’t paid much, just a few pounds an hour; just enough so that on each thursday you and Tom have enough money for movie tickets at the local cinema. It’s your tradition. Like a religious man goes to church each sunday; you spend your thursday nights with Tom’s arm slung around your shoulders, watching whatever new film they have on, sharing a bowl of popcorn between you. Afterwards you'll have burgers at the fast food joint across the street; talking about the movie long into the night, sharing a bag of fries. 

When you were younger and hadn’t been able to afford to pay Tom had sneaked you both into the cinema anyway.  Your hand in his, he had led the way into the movie theatre when no one was looking. Sitting in the back row he’d sneak you Fruit Polos to snack on, his arm slung around your shoulders, as you watched movies you were way too young for.

Last week was your final movie screening; some light-hearted American comedy, and the entire way through it you fought the lump in your throat, forcing yourself not to cry. Tom hadn’t laughed either; had just held you closer than usual. 

Tomorrow you are set to leave the small seaside town behind you, the place where you have spent most of your life, for a drive all across the country; to start university in a city you’ve only visited once before. You’re not sure when you’ll return.

Thus lately everything has been laced with goodbyes; childhood having reached its end.

Just two days ago there had been the last bonfire where you had watched the Holland boys fight each other while playing football as his parents looked on and laughed, grilling sausages over the open fire. 

It was on the same rocky beach where you have spent many summer days; grilling food on the open fire and throwing back cheap beer with your friends from school. You have scraped your knees on these rocks, burned your skin from both the bonfire and the sun there; have had your heart broken over and over and over again during your school years as you watched Tom kiss whatever girl he was dating at the time by the fire during summer night parties.

Maybe you had broken his heart a few times as well. 

As the afternoon light turns everything golden you drive through the main street in the small town where  everyone knows everybody, and has done for generations. You watch the people as you drive them by. You know everyone’s name, know each crack in the pavement; can find your way home in the dark. 

God knows how many shoes you’ve worn out over the years walking down these streets. 

The radio plays a blink-182 song you know by heart as you follow the road out of the city, through the woods and up to the coast. At the end of a muddy track, on the border to the forest, stands a shabby old caravan. It faces the beach and above the door christmas lights are lit up all year round. 

The Holland family legend says that Tom’s great uncle had won the small patch of land in a bet. Unable to build a large house he had bought a caravan and put it on the lot. The old man had lived in the Shed for the rest of his lifetime, before passing it on to Tom; the youngster of the family, his younger brothers having yet to be born. When he had turned seventeen he moved out of his parents larger, more comfortable house, and into the Shed. His mother had agreed on it on the condition he took on the apprenticeship to become a carpenter that he had been offered. 

You remember when he had told you of his decided future, one late evening as you sat on the driftwood by the beach, smoking weed and watching the sun set over the horizon. It had felt right somehow, you had been able to  imagine him working with his hands, skillfully forming and bending wood to his will; his long and slender fingers knowing just how to fix things. Tom has always been good at mending things. It had been three years now and he was a full time employee at the JBT Carpentry Services. He says it doesn’t pay much, but he’s happy; and that's all that matters.

As you park the car outside the Shed Tom comes out. Standing under the colorful christmas lights he grins widely as he sees you, his eyes crinkling at the sides. The most genuine smile you know. He’s tanned from a summer spent on the beach, his hair a wavy mess; as if he’d just woken up from sleep. It’s a warm august day and the world seems sunbleached somehow; but in the afternoon light Tom looks golden. 

You are painfully aware that it is the last time you’ll see him like this for many months to come.

Walking up to him and he gives you a bear-hug; his warm, hard body pressed against yours, holding onto you tightly. With your face in the crook of his neck you breathe him in and discover that a faint trace of bonfire smoke still lingers on his skin. It all feels achingly familiar and safe. So heartrendingly unlike the uncertain life at university that lies in front of you.

Tom is your safe place.

Your parents had always fought like cat and dog and sometimes when you were younger and  they’d argue you’d climb through your window and walk all the way over to the Holland household. You were always welcomed there and his parents didn’t ask any questions, no matter how late the hour; instead they fed you, treating you like a member of the family around the dining table with gentle teasing and reminders of homework that needed to be done, letting you sleep over when needed. No questions asked. 

With the years the fighting at home got worse. When Tom fixed himself a beat-up old Land Rover and moved out to the Shed you’d call him from the payphone down the road. He’d always answer, telling you to pack up; and that he was on his way. He’d pick you up by the end of the street, a duffle bag with schoolbooks and a change of clothes slung over your shoulder. He’d take you back to his place to sleep. His caravan only had one bed, so you used to curl up next to each other in bed. On the nights when you were crying he’d hold you, and in the morning he’d make you breakfast before you both went off to school. 

Your parents never noticed your temporary absence. 

Tom lets go of the hug, but with an arm around your waist he leads you into his home. There’s a lingering scent of fried food in the air and the boombox is playing the 3 Doors down CD he’s been obsessed with since you bought it for his birthday. You tread the cherry wood veneered flooring with your battered tennis shoes, feeling more at home here than anywhere else on earth.

 “Fancy a beer?” Tom asks, leading the way to the kitchen area. “Warn you though, it's warm. Just got back from the store so they haven’t had time to cool”.

Everything is warm today, and the caravan is no exception. The ancient AC had given in years ago and Tom could never afford having it fixed. You heave yourself up on the countertop, replying a simple “sure” to his question. 

He opens a Stella and hands it to you. He isn’t wrong, the beer is tepid. Yet you drown half the bottle in one big swig; happy just to have something to do with your hands when he’s standing so close to you. Gulping down on the liquid and you cannot help but notice Tom’s eyes on your throat as you swallow. He opens a bottle for himself and takes a swig. 

You smile at the ancient gray t-shirt he’s wearing. At one point there had been a band logo on it, but it has long since been washed out. He notices you smiling at him and as if it's infectious a smile broadens on his face as well. “What?” he asks, leaning against the small counter across from you.

“Nothing” you say, smiling wider. “Just wondered how many times I’ve seen you in that shirt. I mean, it has to be near a couple of thousand times by now”.

“You don't exactly love buying new clothes either” he says, a teasing smile playing at his lips as he looks at your washed out jeans shorts. “I know for a fact that those aren’t new, darling”. His eyes linger on your legs for a moment too long before he looks away, taking a swig from his beer. 

“So, when are you leaving?” He asks, and you can tell that he’s trying to sound relaxed, but leaned against the countertop, his arms crossed in front of him, head bowed; holding onto the bottle of Stella he’s nursing with a tight grip. He looks tense and on edge. 

“Tomorrow morning”

He takes a swig from his beer. There’s nothing more to say, not really. Everything that happens now is just aftermath; you might as well have already left. 

“I’m nervous” you admit, biting your lip, trying hard not to et out the tears you’ve been holding in for days now; embarrassed that your voice trembles on the last word. 

His head snaps up to look at you. Pushing off the counter he takes a step forward, placing himself in between your legs. 

“Hey” he says, with a voice a low and gentle as a whisper, his hand cupping your cheek. You look up at him; long dark eyelashes framing his beautiful brown eyes, his thin lips slightly parted and across his nose freckles are spread out, the result from a summer spent in the sun. His calloused hand strokes your cheek. “You’re going to take them by storm, Pebbles”.

You smile, despite your fluttering heart. He hasn’t called you Pebbles for a long time. It had been his nickname for you when you first became friends, the reason behind it long forgotten. He was the only one to ever call you it, and the name had lingered long into your late teenage years. 

“You took me by storm,” he admits. 

You blink up at him through wet eyelashes. Your family had moved to the town when you were ten years old. This was the kind of small town that strangers seldom came to and inhabitants rarely left; and so the new addition to the small local school had everyone talking. You had felt like an astronaut shuffled into space on your first day, trying to find gravity in the unfamiliar school corridors. You had felt the pull of gravity in form of the brown-eyed boy sitting next to you in english class. He had given you a warm smile as you sat down next to him. He had made you his friend, listened to you and confided in you; had made you laugh until your stomach ached. You found further gravity in his home; surrounded by his family and their endless squabbles and laughter, sitting next to Tom at the dinner table.

It hadn’t taken long before you and Tom were an inseparable item; your names always linked to one another in the mouths of others. 

“You’ve worked so hard for this scholarship” he says, and the corners of his mouth tugs up into a smile, “I mean, I’m pretty certain you’re the only reason I even finished school”.

You had helped him write most of his essays at school. He’d struggled with reading a lot and found the assigned novels difficult. There were evenings where you’d spend hours laying on the bed; twisting the phone cord between your fingers, as you read the books out loud for him. 

Sometimes, in order to be left alone from his parents and younger brothers, he’d walk down to the end of the street and to the payphone there, where he’d spend all his pennies listening to you reading. You had talked and talked until your voice got hoarse; until he ran out of pennies. Yet when he hung up you always felt a tug of longing in your chest, knowing you wouldn’t be able to see him until the next day in school. 

“Well,  I heard you’re doing pretty good as a carpenter” you say, smiling up at him. “I always knew you’d be good with your hands”. 

As soon as you’ve said it you can feel your face heat up. You had heard the rumours at school; Tom Holland is a stellar fuck. Once, while you were in the bathroom stall, you had heard a gang of girls discuss it as they reapplied their lipgloss in the mirror. One of them told the story of her one night stand with Tom, how he had made her come several times over with his hands and mouth; how he’d fucked her so long and so good. You had stood in the stall, your heart in your throat; feeling sick to your stomach, but unable to stop listening.

There were girls that reached out to you in school, knowing you were Tom’s closest friend, and asked you in hushed but awed voices if it was true. If he really that good in bed.

He looks you dead in the eye, an unusual seriousness to his warm eyes. He knows what you’re thinking, knows what thoughts have made your cheeks flush with colour. Letting go of your cheek he places his arms on either side of you on the counter; caging you in. 

“There’s never been anyone but you, Pebbles. Not really.” His tone is heavy with meaning and you feel light-headed; both oddly detached from your own body and painfully aware of the closeness of his. Your heart is beating hard in your chest. 

This is a line you’ve never crossed before. 

“I know I’m ruining everything by saying this, but you’re leaving tomorrow and I’ve been walking around with this secret lodged in my chest like a bullet since i was ten years old; I love you, Pebbles. I’ve always have”.

You should speak. You should tell him that you’ve known for a long time how he’s felt. That it’s been evident in the way his eyes keep lingering on your legs, in the way his arm usually finds its way to rest around your waist. In the way he’s always been there for you. You should tell him that you understand why he hasn’t been able to voice his feelings for you; because you haven’t done it either. Too scared of losing him. But your breath has caught in your throat and all you can focus on is those caramel eyes on you, and how hard your heart is beating in your chest.

“I love you too” you say, voice hardly louder than a whisper. You swear there was music coming from the boom box but all you can hear is the blood rushing through your body. 

He kisses you.

He takes your mouth slowly, kissing you thoroughly until you can’t think straight; can’t remember any other kiss than his. Then his lips move over yours with more fervour; more urgency, one hand around your throat and the other tangled in your hair. He kisses you until you're both moaning and gasping for more. 

This is it. You’ve crossed the invisible line between friends and lovers; and there is no return, no going back from here. When you leave tomorrow you will leave knowing what his mouth feels like pressed against your.

You dig your hands into his soft hair, runs them both up his chest, realising that this is what your hands were made for. He lifts you off the counter and you wrap your legs around his waist. He moves you both across the caravan and into the bedroom. It’s baking hot in there and you can already feel sweat forming at the low end of your back. The room, just big enough for a bed to fit, is lit up with sunlight. His bed is a mess of rumpled white sheets and the walls are the same cherry wood colour as the rest of the caravan. 

You kiss and lick his jaw, his neck, his throat; anywhere you can reach you stroke him. You tug at his hair, kiss his soft lips, and nib at his ear. It’s like the gates have been opened, because even though his arm has always been a comforting presence around your waist; and even though you’ve slept in the same bed more times than you can count, his body curled up next to yours, forming himself like a question mark around your body; he’s never been yours to touch before. Not like this.

His breathing is accelerated, his chest rising and falling in rapid speed, and so is yours. There’s a heat to his eyes that tells you he’s just as turned on as you are. You pull at his shirt before he’s even laid you down on the bed; impatiently craving all his warm, suntanned skin pressed against yours. It’s an almost feverish frenzy, and in the back of your mind you know that you should take this slow. You don’t want this to end too soon, because this might be all you get. But the sun hasn’t even set yet and through the old white-washed curtains you helped put up and light shines through, bathing you both sunshine. 

Outside the waves keep crashing against the shore and in the kitchen his boombox keeps playing songs you’ve heard a million times before. It is like it always has been at Tom’s, except that for laying on his sofa and talking he’s removing your clothes; kissing his way down your body. Wet, opened mouth kisses that leave a trail of heat in its wake that have you bucking your hips up for more. His hands are everywhere, exploring your legs. He’s looking at your skin with wide-eyes adoration. With his body in between your wide spread legs he kisses the soft inside of your thighs. 

“So soft” he groans against your skin, “and so sweet”.

You feel overheated and breathless; aching all over from wanting him. Perched up on your elbows you observe him; his dark hair brushing against the low of your stomach as he kisses the tender skin of your hip bone. He bares his teeth and bites the sensitive flesh. 

His hand cups your cunt. You’re wet and aching and as you presses his thumb to your clit, gently but steadily moving up and down, you feel like you’re going to combust. His strokes are soft at first, before speeding up, making you moan wantonly, spreading your legs wider for him.

“Glad you like that,” he says, a satisfied smile spreading on his face. “Do my fingers feel good on you, darling?”

All you can do is moan in response, arching and moving your hips up to meet his hand. His movements are fast and slippery and it doesn’t take long until your close, so close, so close; on the brink of tipping over and then - 

A sharp slap on your pussy, leaving a stinging bite, and it is like the world splits into two. 

“God” you moan, voice hoarse. You’re shuddering all over; moanes falling freely from your lips. 

He looks up at you from his position in between your legs, his dark eyes sparkling. He kisses the soft inside of your thighs again. “You have any idea how long I’ve wanted to kiss you here?” he asks. “I bet you do, torturing me for fun in those short jeans shorts”. He spanks your pussy again and you couldn’t have stopped the moan falling from your lips even if you tried. “How long I’ve wanted to taste you here?”. And he places a hot kiss on your wet slit. You can feel his soft hair pressed against your thighs; his warm breath against your skin.

His lips part and he covers you with his mouth, his tongue moving over your opening; touching you, stroking you, tasting you. A guttural moan leaves him. He looks up at you through tassels of hair, caramel eyes glued to your face.

You fall back against the mattress, “more” you demand, in a voice that sounds a lot like begging. “Please, more”.

It is as if he’s been unleashed. You have never felt anything like it, but he laps you up, tastes you; his fingers moving inside you; pressing against the place that has you seeing stars. You can’t even look at him now, you’re eyes shut; too overwhelmed by the stimulation. Both aching for more but not sure if your body can handle that kind of pleasure. Your thighs are shaking, and something in your stomach grows tighter and tighter by each flick of his tongue against your clit.

“I’m coming” you cry out breathlessly “fuck I’m coming”

And you do. Hard. He keeps kissing and touching you through it; both grounding you and dragging out the intense sensation. 

His hands, now familiar with your thighs, make their way up to the soft swell of your breasts, as you struggle to regain your breath. He’s cupping them in his hands, pinching your nipples in between his fingers, kissing them with ferveor. Hungry hands move over your breasts, your stomach, your face; cupping it so that he can kiss you with the sort of yearning that comes from years of unanswered desire. 

Your hands move over his body as well, moving over his abdomen chest and arms, defined from long hours of hard work. You kiss his throat and collarbones, kissing at the skin; licking, sucking and biting until you hear guttural moans coming from his throat. His lips are slightly parted, and his glossy dark eyes are fixed on your face; his fingers loosely tangled in your hair. 

He presses you down onto the mattress again, until he’s face to face; his arms on each side of your face, holding himself over you.

“You sure?” he asks, voice hoarse, panting slightly. 

“I want this” you answer him, voice low but clear, “I really, really want this Tom”

He smiles, breathing out the breath he’d been holding and moves away from you, reaching for the side of his bed and to take out a condom from the drawer. 

He places a quick kiss to your lips, your cheek, your belly button, before he sits up. He removes his underwear and you can feel your face heat up again. Because this is Tom, your Tom, whom you’ve been in love with for half your life. But being with him, both naked as the day you were born, feels right. You know everything about this man, all his preferences and secrets; his favourite movie and how he likes his food and why he skipped class every day for a month in year nine. And he knows everything about you. It feels right that he should know this as well; know each curve of your body and the way you like to be kissed and what has you moaning and begging for more. 

He unwraps the foil package and puts the condom on with firm fingers. Leaning over you again he lines up against your opening. His eyes glossy with lust, damp hair falling over his face; his mouth swollen and wet from kissing you.

Then with a sharp thrust and a groan he’s inside you. 

All coherent thoughts go out the window as he starts moving in and out of you. The only thing that exists is his strong, sweaty body above you, moving in and out of you with slow, deep thrusts. He’s so hard where you are soft and you can’t stop touching him, dragging your fingers over his back, pulling at his hair, kissing his arms. It’s like the wires in your brain have crossed, sending out sparks of pure pleasure in your body. 

He hits a particularly tender spot inside you and the groan that leaves you is almost animalistic.

Tom nearly halters in his pace, before collecting himself again. “Fuck” he moans out, kissing your neck. His movements become more frenzied and you roll your hips under him, meeting his movements; trying to get him deeper inside you. 

He pushes himself up onto his hands, pulls back slightly; and pushes in. Starting to really fuck you. 

You can’t stop looking up at him; naked body damp with sweat, muscles moving as he works; arms flexed and cheeks flushed. His eyes are closed pleasure now. Your hands are on his hips helping him set the pace as he fucks into you with fast, hard thrusts. Without warning you clutch around him in pleasure and he groans loudly.

“How the fuck does your cunt feel better than it tastes?” he asks, panting for air. “

He presses a hand over your heart, letting it rest there. You wonder if he can feel it pounding for him. You feel like you’re dissolving into a thousand tiny pieces as you come around him with a choked scream. 

He’s so close and you can practically feel it; aching for him to have it. You want him to come; in you, on you, over you. 

And then he does, his brows furrows; like the pleasure is so intense it hurts him. The sounds he makes when he comes are guttural; almost whimpering. 

As he falls down on the bed beside you he pulls you close, has you pressed against his body, an arm firmly wrapped around you. The sun has set now, but the ocean waves still crash onto the shore, the sound of it the only thing to fill the silence part from your laboured breathing; the music having gone quiet in the other room. 

Neither one of you say anything. You knew the end to this when he kissed you. You’ve regretted nothing that has happened here, and you know that he doesn’t either; but tomorrow you are leaving to drive all the way across the country and he cannot follow. You don’t know what will happen now, and he doesn't have the answer to that either. And so you just let him hold you; wishing with all your might that you could stop the morning from coming.

***

Please let me know your thoughts, genuinely don’t know what to make of this one. 

[ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa]

Addicted to You

Part III: Renegade

Summary/Author's Notes: Frankie (and the rest of the boys) goes and gets his girl back. I won't say anything else because I know y'all have been waiting.

Pairing: Frankie Morales x Pope's sister!Reader Word Count: 4.5k Warnings/Rating: R/18+ once again STRONG kidnapping elements, restraint, violence, death, murder, blood, language, PTSD, hurt/comfort

Gif by @hvitserkk

MASTERLIST

Part I Part II

Apparently this hell hole of a jungle insisted on being true to its word. Ever since they had left the bar it had been pouring down rain. Large torrents of water cascaded from the dark sky like the dump bucket at the local water park crashing down on a bunch of screaming kids. Unsurprisingly, Frankie had not slept at all. He tossed and turned on his cot in their hostel, spending the majority of the night staring at the ceiling, listening to Benny snore, and thinking about you.

A few times he gave up his restless dance and got up to crack the window and light a cigarette. Pope was already up as well, unable to rest for the same reasons Frankie couldn't, and he held out a smoke and a lighter to him in silence.

"Thanks," Frankie said, quietly and Pope nodded. The two of them didn't speak. What was there to say? He offered his presence and a cigarette as an apology and Frankie took it. That's just how they had always operated, with an unspoken language of knowing that even if they were pissed at each other, there was no one else they would rather have watching their six.

The watch on Pope's wrist beeped quietly and he pressed the button, nodding to Frankie that it was time to head out. Frankie returned the gesture, taking another long drag of his smoke as Pope started to wake the others. He stared up at the dark sky and wished there was some way to tell you that he was coming for you. Whatever was happening, whatever state you were in, just hold out a little longer.

The thickness of the canopy of leaves on Lorea's property helped with the rain. The large drops pat on the trees with soft thuds as the men took up their positions from yesterday and started in towards the mansion. Only this time, each of them was geared up, locked and loaded. Frankie was careful of his steps not because of noise this time, but because of the mud. The sheer amount of water that the forest floor had received overnight had flooded every tiny creek bed, and eroded enough earth that even the smallest hill was just an avalanche of silt. His shirt was already stuck to his body, protected only by his Kevlar and the pack slung over his back.

Pope turned his hat around backwards as he took up his sniping position on the hill and looked through his scope. Frankie moved quietly through the trees towards the gate and Will flanked him, each lowering their guns to start snipping the chain link fence with their bolt cutters. Benny mirrored Pope's sniper stance from the East side and kept a careful eye poised on the two men below working on the gate.

"Well, I guess it's a good thing they're so devout," Benny said flatly through the com piece. "My dad used to say when it's raining, that means god didn't need us in church today."

Will chuckled and shook his head, finishing up clipping the fence and putting the bolt cutters back in his backpack. "Yeah, he also said you go to heaven for the climate, and hell for the company."

"Actually I think Mark twain said that, shithead." His brother retorted as he adjusted his scope and checked on Frankie's progress with the fence.

"Alright, keep the radio clear. Stay awake and look alive." Tom's voice came through everyone's ears, his obviously irritated tone making Frankie roll his eyes. "How many is that, getting in, Fish? Count it."

Frankie looked up as he finished cutting and watched the family pile in the car adorned in their Sunday best and umbrellas. "Seven getting in the van," he answered Tom.

"Anybody see Lorea?" Pope asked.

"Negative. Never saw him come out." Will walked carefully back to his spot perpendicular to the road that led out of the fortress. He ducked behind a tree as the cars drove passed him down the gravel road. "Wife and two kids are with a single driver--the family has left the building. We're clear."

They all waited in silence as the family vans disappeared and another unmarked, black car rounded the corner in their place. Pope's informant had been true to her word and was here to deliver the day's round of Lorea's money like she didn't know that he was about to be robbed blind. The gates opened slowly and she drove right through. She had a beat up four door hitched to the van so she could drive away and leave them the extra van, just like Pope had asked.

"Damn Pope, your girlfriend is a keeper. She got us that second van." Benny said, looking through his scope and adjusting the settings. "Punctual, smart, and brave as shit--just how you like 'em."

Pope ignored his quip about the informant and asked, "Has anyone seen any sign of (Y/N)?"

"Negative." Frankie said flatly, squeezing the com button clipped to the inside of his shirt. His eyes diligently searched each window of the upper floor, desperate for even the smallest sign that you were inside and alive. But he saw nothing.

"Informant is in," Benny cut through the silence. "Making the handoff now."

"Here we go," Tom raised up off of his knees and started to move. "Ben, you're first hit. With this rain the guards are gonna be inside. Watch your angles--silence is key."

"Roger."

Will and Frankie started walking toward the back of the mansion, matching each other's strides as they let Pope take point in front of them through the tall grasses. Each man had their semi-automatic rifle level with their eyes, balanced against their chest as they strained their ears and vision to see anything in this fucking rain. Frankie ducked his head under the family's clothes line as they entered the backyard and waited for Pope to give them a hand signal.

To an outsider, this would have looked like any normal family's patio. A children's sized soccer goal and a few balls were off to the side, a grill and a white iron table and chairs sat waiting for summer time barbeques. And only a prick like Lorea would subject his family to his dealings out here in the middle of nowhere. Frankie hoped with everything he had that the man in question was inside, because he couldn't wait to get his hands on him.

"Steady." Pope said over the com and motioned that he was going in the side patio door, and that the other two should go in through the double doors.

"Alright," Will nodded, looking at Frankie and motioning him to take the lead. "We're going in."

The house was dark. Will checked the windows but it didn't offer much insight before they crossed the threshold. Most of the glass had been covered with newspaper, bleached from the sun and offering little to help with what he could only imagine was Lorea's paranoia. A lot of the furniture was covered in sheets and protective cloth like they had just moved in or were getting ready to move out--either way, it wasn't very homey.

Pope nodded as he crossed paths with the two of them from the side door, taking note of the guard watching soccer in the living room at such a volume that suggested he was absolutely hard of hearing. But that sure made sneaking passed him easier.

Will and Frankie headed to the kitchen. The fridge door was open and a faceless man was rifling through the contents. Frankie let Will take point, keeping his gun raised as the blond slung his over his shoulder and waited for the guard to shut the fridge. As soon as he did, he was on him with a swift punch to the face. Will twisted the man around and wrapped his bicep around his neck, putting him in a sleeper hold, squeezing tighter as the man struggled, ultimately falling unconscious and sliding to the floor.

Frankie white knuckled his gun as he saw that it was the smaller guard from the day before--the one who had called you merchandise. He hesitated, but shook it off as Will tossed him a zip tie and they secured the man's wrists and ankles before stowing him on the other side of the counter.

"Front gate secured," Benny said over the com from outside the house.

"One guard secured in the kitchen," Frankie answered as they crossed back into the foyer.

"Ben come to the house," Tom ordered from his place on the rooftop balcony

"Copy that."

Will followed Frankie into the next room as they looked across the foyer at Pope. The guard who had previously been watching his ridiculously loud television was nowhere to be seen. Benny's shadow appeared in front of the frosted glass of the French double doors and Pope held up a fist that he hoped he would be able to see.

"I'm at the front door."

"Hold Benny, hold," Pope responded, keeping his fist raised.

"Threat in the TV room is gone," Frankie said, keeping his voice calm and factual, letting Benny know the reason he was continuing to stand in the rain.

All three men looked up as the missing guard came down the staircase. Frankie's eyes narrowed as he realized who the guard in question was. He remembered the clear image of his disgusting hands over your mouth, hurting you, restraining you, and ultimately striking you--bitch. muzzle. cunt. His heart hammered in his chest and he could hear the blood rushing in his ears and he did the only thing he could think of. With an echo through the high ceiling entryway, he squeezed the trigger and fired, hitting the bald guard in the kneecap and sending him to the ground with a thud and a yell.

"What's going on in there??" Benny said over the com and Pope lowered his fist.

"All clear Benny. Eyes out for Lorea--"

"Well, he sure as fuck heard us now!" Will growled, dropping to his knee and pulling the zip ties and electrical tape from his pack. He spared a glare at Frankie as he got to work but Frankie felt no remorse. If he didn't need to find you, he would have shot the bastard a second time.

Will wrapped the black tape around the guys mouth to muffle his painful screams as Frankie pulled the zip tie tightly around his ankles--perhaps a little tighter than was necessary. The three of them looked up as Benny came in the front door and Pope pointed to the open utility closet at the left of the stairs.

"Set the charges for the security room. I want those cameras offline now! It's just Lorea and I do not want him to know our positions." Pope took a couple of stairs up and raised his rifle back to balance on his shoulder as he looked around the corner.

"What was the fuck was that? Who shot first?" Tom hissed through the com and they looked at Frankie.

"We had to shoot the third guard in the leg." Ben answered as he started pulling wires out of the cameras and lining the inside with a small amount of explosive, wetting his fingers with his tongue. "Taking him to the kitchen as we speak." He looked pointedly at Will and Frankie. It made Frankie realize that, unlike Tom, none of them would blame him for the shot, but they had to stay focused and keep moving.

They picked up the still grunting and thrashing guard and carried him into the other room and Benny turned his head and said with a grin, "Fire in the hole."

The camera system fuse sparked and popped like a line of firecrackers and all at once every camera in the compound went dark.

The rest of them let Frankie and Pope take the lead as they walked up the stairs. Both men shoulder to shoulder as they aimed down the sight of their guns and looked in each open door that led to a room, hoping that you would be there. With each empty room Frankie's heart beat harder. He found it more difficult to breathe every time he swept the area and you weren't there. Sweat dripped off his brow, both from the humidity in the house and the fear of the possibility that you were no longer in the house at all.

The two of them came to the last closed doors in the hallway and they looked at each other.

"You take right, I'll take left?" Pope offered and Frankie nodded wordlessly.

"I got your six," Will said behind them both as Tom and Benny moved to take the double doors that led to Lorea's office.

Frankie tried to calm his hands as he took one off of his gun to open the door. The room was dark and cluttered, a nice set of bay windows being the only light as rain pounded against the glass. Frankie swept the room slowly, using the barrel of his rifle as a guide for his eyes as they adjusted to the low light. He lowered his gun slowly as he laid eyes on you, for even in shadows he knew it had to be you.

"(Y/n).." he breathed out, dropping his rifle and backpack to the floor with a thud. Nothing in the house mattered anymore, not Lorea, not the Narcos money--even if Will wasn't watching his back, he would have dropped everything he was carrying to get to you faster.

You had heard footsteps and a gunshot long before Frankie hit the door. Not that any of the warning sounds mattered because you were basically a sitting duck, and you had been for almost twenty-four hours. Time was irrelevant though as the blindfold around your eyes made everything dark at all hours of the day. As the footsteps got closer you clenched your fists and pulled against the zip ties that held you against the straight back chair. A whimper fell around the gag that was biting into your cheeks and as a hand touched each of your arms, you let out a muffled scream.

The sound alone felt like someone was ripping Frankie's heart out with his own hunting knife. He released you like you had burned him and quickly went for your blindfold first so you could see it was him, not Lorea, not his thugs...him.

"(Y/n)! Baby, stop--it's me, it's me!" He raised his voice to be heard over your fear and you froze.

Blinking slowly, your eyes adjusted to the light as he came into focus in front of you. Frankie. Your Frankie. Frankie Morales was squatting in front of you, looking up at your face with a mixture of elation and worry.

His large but gentle hands reached up and, careful of your hair, slipped the cloth gag out of your mouth and let it drop to the floor.

"Cat?" You rasped weakly, the one word catching in your throat like a stone. Your mouth hurt and felt like it was full of paste, dry and clammy at the same time.

"Yeah," he laughed softly in relief as if hearing your voice made you more real. "Hold on, doll." He said, pulling his knife out of the sheath on his boot and cutting through the restraints on your ankles before moving up to each wrist. The plastic snapped easily under the blade and your body felt like it's entire existence gave a sigh as the blood flow resumed to those areas.

Before you could stop yourself, you crumbled off of the chair and against his chest, but he was expecting it. He knew you better than anyone and like always, it was as if he could read your thoughts. Your sobs came easier than you would have liked, but they were impossible to fight.

Frankie's arms wrapped around your body like they had a thousand times before. One hand went to your hair and he looked over his shoulder to Will, "Get Pope." His words were as quiet as he could keep them while still allowing the other man to hear him over your tears.

"Of course," Will nodded, leaving the room at a jog.

"Santi's here?" You managed to choke out and you felt him nod.

"You bet," he tightened his grip on you, clearing the emotion out of his own throat. "Who do you think called in the calvary?"

The fact that your brother had been the one to track you down was not surprising in the slightest. You had hoped against all odds that the moment you didn't show up to meet him in the city, he would have allowed his paranoia to go into full force. But you had no idea that it meant he would rally a rescue posse. It made sense--there was no way he would be able to take the mansion solo, but knowing that all of his guys, the guys that you considered part of the Garcia family, had dropped everything to help him find you made your chest tight. The tears started again and you gripped Frankie's Kevlar vest, too tired to fight them.

"Hey," he whispered, pulling you back against him. "I got you. You're safe now--we're gonna get out of here."

You nodded and looked back up at him. Two years. Two years and not a damn thing had changed about the man in front of you. He still wore a ball cap that you were certain you had seen before, his thick, dark hair curled out from under it and you knew if the hat came off it would be sticking out in every direction. Your fingers itched to touch it, to touch him, any part of him that wasn't the tactical gear that covered the outside of his body. The scruff at the sides of his jaw had just a touch of gray, now that was new, but then again neither of you were kids anymore. You couldn't stop yourself as you touched the edge of his beard with the tips of your fingers. He was here. He was real. And despite the distance and the time between your last encounter, he had come for you.

"Can I kiss you?" Frankie choked out in the empty room as if he held the thought in any longer he was going to burst. His chest ached, and his jaw hurt from clenching his entire body to keep his own tears at bay. He didn't need to add his own shit on top of your distress, and he shouldn't have asked for such an intimate act after just untying you from a fucking chair. But he heard Will's voice promising him that he would get to tell you everything he had ever meant to since you met.

"Yes, yes," you nodded, a few more tears slipping down your cheeks.

He cupped your face and looked at you like he had never seen you before. Your cheek was bruised from the day before, the purple edges starting to turn yellow but the majority not the center remained a painful looking black. Your lip was swollen, very obviously cut open and recently dried by something forceful and crass that should have never been allowed to touch you in the first place. The corners of your mouth were irritated and chapped from the gag and from screaming, another image that he didn't want either of you to have to remember after today.

He shouldn't kiss you, he shouldn't entertain such a self indulgent act when you were this badly hurt, but you didn't stop him. If he was a bigger man, he would have stopped himself, but the thought vanished as he met your eyes. Those soft, kind, eyes that he wanted to lose himself in were so tired, red with tears, and downright broken. If Lorea was still in this house...he would skin him alive.

His lips were a feather's touch against your own and you swallowed the whimper that threatened to leave your mouth because you knew such a noise would gut him. You wanted to hold him close and never let him go again. Suddenly all of the excuses you had ever had for settling down with Frankie Morales were bullshit. You allowed your arms to be pinned against his chest as he held you close and you closed your eyes. He smelled like rain and sweat but under that he smelled like how you remembered, like campfire and earth.

Not wanting to cause you any discomfort, he allowed himself one last quiet peck before nosing your cheek and exhaling softly.

"Take me home, Frankie," you breathed against his face, your voice shaking despite your efforts. "I just want to go home."

He nodded against you and you felt his grip tighten. "You got it. We're going home."

"(Y/n)?," Pope said as he broke the threshold of the room and laid eyes on you and Frankie. "Oh, gracias a Dios," he said, lowering his voice as he crossed the room and fell to his knees with a graceful thud. Frankie relinquished his hold on you so the other man could gather you up into his arms.

You hugged him back as tightly as you could, but nothing prepared you for the grip he engulfed you in and the grimace on your face made Will speak up. "Easy, man, she's seen better days," he called from his position in the doorway and it made you smile.

"Are you hurt? What did they do?" Pope said, sitting back on his heels and holding you at arm's length to see your injuries.

"I'm okay," you tried to sound reassuring. "Sore, but okay."

"Did you have any idea why they wanted your crew?" Will asked, and you shook your head.

"No, I don't. I've been in this room since I got here. I know they change who guards the door, but that's it." You put a hand on Frankie's leg to steady yourself and his hand found the small of your back. Even sitting on the floor, you felt weak, you were so tired.

For two days the only human contact you had was with a select few of Lorea's men. With a shift change, they gave you water, led you to the bathroom, and then redid the zip ties on your hands and feet. The blindfold stayed on through everything and they had strict orders to keep their hands to themselves and not rough you up too much. You weren't stupid--Journalists made good ransom chits, especially American, female ones.

"Is there any of your crew left?" Will asked and you shook your head.

"They killed them, oh god," your hands started to shake again and your breath caught as you remembered the men kneeling in the tennis courts of the mansion, landing in a puddle of blood and darker things with each bang of a gun. "They're dead--it's just me."

Santiago pulled you back against him and put his chin on top of your hair. "It's okay. Stop. Nothing you did would have stopped it. Your job was to survive, remember?"

You nodded, not really wanting one of your brother's trademark military pep-talks. You knew he was right, what else could you have done? But that thought didn't do anything to change the bile in your stomach that made you want to throw up.their coms crackled to life, thankfully drawing yourself out of your own thoughts.

"Fish? You got eyes on (y/n)?" Benny's voice came over the radio and you looked at Will who gave you a wink. Of course he had brought his little brother on the rescue mission.

Frankie reached up and clicked the button pinned to the collar of his shirt. "Yeah we got her. She's okay."

"Good," Tom's voice crackled back. "Now, everyone to the upstairs office. We got a problem."

"Shit," Pope cursed, getting up and letting go of your arms so Frankie could take over. "Take your time," he said to you as your knees wobbled and Frankie hooked his arm around your waist.

"I got her," the other man said, nodding his head in the direction of the door. "Go see what's wrong."

Pope hesitated, taking another glance at you before nodding his thanks to Frankie and Will. The blond moved to the side, but kept his post of guarding the door so Frankie could give you his full attention. He started unbuckling his bulletproof vest and you looked at him in confusion. He tossed his backpack next to his gun on the floor, clearly intent on getting to the vest itself.

"What are you doing?"

"You're gonna put this on," he said flatly, pulling the Kevlar over his head in one fluid motion.

"Frankie, you need that," you tried to protest but he shook his head.

"Arms up," he said firmly and you obeyed in silence. He was gentle as he pulled it over your head and tightened the first strap on your side. He clipped the buckle and moved to the next one, making sure the material hugged you tightly and was secure. As much as you wanted to argue, the look on his face made you bite your tongue. His sole mission was to get you would of that mansion alive by whatever means necessary.

His handsome face was much too serious and you couldn't help putting your hand on his cheek as he leaned down towards your chest to finish the last buckle around your back. The small smile you received was worth the action. He pulled a handgun from the back of his belt and held it in his palm.

"Safety," he said pointing to the small black dot under the magazine. He clicked it up and the dot showed the smallest flash of orange paint underneath. "On."

"I know how to handle a glock, Cat," you said quietly and he grinned.

"Just making sure," he raised his hands in playful defense as he let the full weight of the gun transfer to your own hand. "I know it's not the beretta."

You blushed and shook your head as you holstered the gun in the waistband of your jeans. You suddenly wished you had the beretta that was sitting useless in the nightstand beside your bed. Santiago had purchased it before he left back for Columbia and he entrusted Frankie to teach you how to use it. And the man in front of you had stayed true to his word.

"Let's keep moving," Will broke the silence between the two of you and nodded his head down the hall.

Frankie agreed with a nod of his own and started to walk towards the door only to stop and hold his hand slightly behind him. You crossed the gap and gripped it tightly, something you had done a thousand times, felt as wonderful as it had years ago. "Stay with me," he said gently and you nodded. He knew it was an unnecessary request, because right now, he couldn't think of a single thing that would make him let you out of his sight.

--

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[chaolskingdom]

Game of Thrones Playlist + Spotify Links

I’m finally back with a new playlist and I absolutely loved making this. I watched the show and read the books so I felt like GoT really has a lot of Playlist potetial and well here we are.

I will udate this playlist regulary, like my other playlists too. The “Other Characters” section will likely still be improved.

If you have any more song suggestions I should add then just comment :)

Click on the headers to get to the Spotiy Playlists

Game of Thrones

Game of Survival - Ruelle

Dead of Night – Ruelle

Secrets and Lies – Ruelle

Hero – Ruelle

Monsters – Ruelle

Timbers and Wind – Peter Hollens (S3 E9)

Glory and Gore – Lorde

When the Sun Goes Down – Tommee Profitt

Risk it All – Mono Inc.

No One’s Here To Sleep – Bastille

Team – Lorde (S8 E1 – E3)

A Storm is Comin – Tommee Profitt

Monsters – Tommee Profitt

Claim Your Weapons – Christian Reindl

New Kings – Sleeping Wolf

Fear Not This Night – Freya Catherine (S8 E2)

Sound Of War – Tommee Profitt

Undone – Tommee Profitt

Noble Blood – Tommee Profitt

Here We Stand – Hidden Citizens

Kings and Queens and Vagabonds – Ellem

Up in Flames – Ruelle

Robb Stark

Glitter and Gold – Barns Courtney

The Driver – Bastille

Soldier – Fleurie

Wildfire – Seafret (to Talisa)

Beautiful Mess – Kristian Kostov (to Talisa)

Pieces – Red (to Talisa)

Remembrance – Tommee Profitt (to Talisa)

Hold My Girl – George Ezra (to Talisa)

North – Sleeping At Last (Winterfell)

Summer Skeletons – Radical Face (Winterfell)

When the Wolves Cry Out – Miracle Of Sound

Sansa Stark

After the Storm – Mumford and Sons (S8)

Rival – Ruelle

Whatever It Takes – Imagine Dragons

Yellow Flicker Beat – Lorde

A Little Wicked – Valerie Broussard

Battle Cry – Beth Crowley

Will I Make It out Alive – Tommee Profitt

My Domain – SVRCINA

These Roots – Grey

I’m Not Afraid – Tommee Profitt

Ember – Katherine McNamara

You should see me in a crown  - Billie Eilish

Deep End – Ruelle

No One’s Here To Sleep – Bastille (to Petyr Baelish S7)

I Know Your Secrets – Tommee Profitt (to Petyr Baelish S7)

Running With The Wolves – AURORA (S7)

Believer – Imagine Dragons

Something Wild – Lindsey Sterling

Unbreakable – Nick Howard

Zero Tolerance – Tommee Profitt

New Kings – Sleeping Wolf

The One to Survive – Hidden Citizens

Fear Not This Night – Freya Catherine

North – Sleeping At Last (Winterfell)

Dog Days Are Over – Florence + The Machine

Summer Skeletons – Radical Face (Winterfell)

Home – AURORA  (S6 E4)

When the Wolves Cry Out – Miracle Of Sound

Me and Mine – The Brothers Bright

Arya Stark

After the Storm – Mumford and Sons (S8)

Far From Home – Sam Tinnesz

Battle Cry – Imagine Dragons (S8 E3)

Whatever It Takes – Imagine Dragons

Yellow Flicker Beat – Lorde

Battle Cry – Beth Crowley

Will I Make It out Alive – Tommee Profitt

My Domain – SVRCINA

I’m Not Afraid – Tommee Profitt

Natural – Imagine Dragons

New Blood – Zayde Wolf

Believer – Imagine Dragons

Watch Me – The Phantoms

Something Wild – Lindsey Stirling

The Devil Within – Digital Daggers

Monsters – Tommee Profitt

New Kings – Sleeping Wolf

The One to Survive – Hidden Citizens

Fear Not This Night – Freya Catherine

North – Sleeping At Last (Winterfell)

Summer Skeletons – Radical Face (Winterfell)

Home – AURORA (S7 E4)

When the Wolves Cry Out – Miracle Of Sound

Me and Mine – The Brothers Bright

Bran Stark

The Raven – Karliene

Runaway – AURORA

North – Sleeping At Last (Winterfell)

Running  With The Wolves – AURORA

Midnight – Radical Face

Summer Skeletons – Radical Face (Winterfell)

Home – AURORA (S7 E4)

When the Wolves Cry Out – Miracle Of Sound

Jon Snow

Winter Winds – Mumford and Sons (Jon/Daenerys)

Dust Bowl Dance – Mumford and Sons

Thistle and Weeds – Mumford and Sons (to Daenerys)

I Gave You All – Mumford and Sons (S8 E6)

After the Storm – Mumford and Sons (S8)

These Roots – Grey

Natural – Imagine Dragons

I Apologize – Five Finger Death Punch

Bad Dream – Ruelle

Deep End – Ruelle

The Driver – Bastille

Empty crown – YAS

Iron - Woodkid

We Must Be Killers – Mikky Ekko (S8 E5)

You’re Somebody Else – flora cash (to Daenerys S8)

Who Are You, Really? – Mikky Ekko (to Daenerys)

With You Til The End – Tommee Profitt (to Daenerys)

Meet Me on the Battlefield – SVRCINA

Warriors – Imagine Dragons

Believer – Imagine Dragons

Soldier – Fleurie

Wildfire – Seafret (to Ygritte)

Even If It Hurts – Sam Tinnesz (to Daenerys)

Walk Through The Fire – Zayde Wolf

Let Her Go – Passenger (to Ygritte/Daenerys)

Hymn For The Missing – Red (to Ygritte)

Still Here – Digital Daggers (to Ygritte)

Dark On Me – Starset (to Ygritte)

Hurts Like Hell – Fleurie (to Ygritte)

There’s a Hero in You – Tommee Profitt

Fear Not This Night – Freya Catherine (S8 E2)

North – Sleeping At Last (Winterfell)

Summer Skeletons – Radical Face (Winterfell)

Home – AURORA (S7 E4)

When the Wolves Cry Out – Miracle Of Sound

Daenerys Targaryen

Onward and Upward – Tommee Profitt

Welcome to Hell – Mono Inc. (to Cercei)

Rival – Ruelle

Deep End - Ruelle

Monster – Beth Crowley (S7/8)

Battle Cry – Imagine Dragons (S8)

Whatever It Takes – Imagine Dragons

Yellow Flicker Beat – Lorde

The Hate Inside – Sam Tinnesz

Play With Fire – Sam Tinnesz

A Little Wicked – Valerie Broussard

Will I Make It out Alive – Tommee Profitt

My Domain – SVRCINA

No More Heroes – Aviators

Castle – Halsey

Invincible – Ruelle (S8)

Until We Go Down – Ruelle

This Is My World – Esterly

Ember – Katherine McNamara

You should see me in a crown – Billie Eilish

Survivor – 2WEI

Here I am – Tommee Profitt (S7 E4)

Iron – Woodkid

Gloria Regali – Tomee Profitt

Let There Be Fire – Aviators

Monster – Beth Crowley

Two Evils – Bastille (S8)

Ready Set Let’s Go – Sam Tinnesz

Witching Hour – Tommee Profitt (S8 E5)

Believer – Imagine Dragons

Soldier – Fleurie

Casualty – Hidden Citizens (S8)

Lover. Fighter. – SVRCINA

Warrior – Beth Crowley (to Jon)

Midnight Oil – Tommee Profitt (to Jon)

War of Hearts – Ruelle (to Jon)

Hymn For The Missing – Red (to Drogo)

Still Here – Digital Daggers (to Drogo)

Dark On Me – Starset (to Drogo)

Crown [Extended Version] - Camila Cabello & Grey

In My Blood – Tommee Profitt

Here I Am – Tommee Profitt

Champion – Tommee Profitt

Control – Halsey

New Kings – Sleeping Wolf

Fear Not This Night – Freya Catherine (S8 E2)

Me and Mine – The Brothers Bright

Jamie Lannister

Babel – Mumford and Sons (Season 8)

Natural – Imagine Dragons

I Apologize – Five Finger Death Punch

Deep End – Ruelle

I’ll Be Good – Jaymes Young

Wrong Side Of Heaven – Five Finger Death Punch

Iron – Woodkid (S8)

Same Mistake – James Blunt (S8)

Whose Side Are You On – Ruelle

Battle Cry – Beth Crowley

Go To War – Nothing More

Casualty – Hidden Citizens (S8)

Find You – Ruelle (To Cercei S8 E5)

With You Til The End – Tommee Profitt (to Cercei)

Lioness – Sivert Hoyem (To Cercei S7,8)

Remembering Myself – Stephen (to Brienne)

Another Love – Tom Odell (to Brienne)

There’s a Hero in You – Tommee Profitt

Monster – Imagine Dragons

Tyrion Lannister

Little Lion Man – Mumford and Sons

Thistle and Weeds – Mumford and Sons (to Daenerys)

When the Raven Dies Tonight – Mono Inc.

Natural – Imagine Dragons

I Apologize – Five Finger Death Punch

Bad Dream – Ruelle

Hollow – Cloudeater

We Must Be Killers – Mikky Ekko (S8)

Cercei Lannister

My Way – Chase Holfelder

Whatever It Takes – Imagine Dragons

My Domain – SVRCINA

The Devil Within – Digital Daggers

Champion – Tommee Profitt

Me and Mine – The Brothers Bright

Sandor Clegane

Battle Cry – Beth Crowley

Natural – Imagine Dragons

New Blood – Zayde Wolf

I Apologize – Five Finger Death Punch

Monster – Starset

Man or a Monster – Sam Tinnesz

Bad Man – Esterly

I’ll Be Good – Jaymes Young

Iron – Woodkid

What I’ve Done – Linkin Park

I’m A Wanted Man – Royal Deluxe

There’s a Hero in You – Tommee Profitt

Beekeeper – Keaton Henson

Fear Not This Night – Freya Catherine (S8 E2)

Monster – Imagine Dragons

Theon Greyjoy

Dust Bowl Dance – Mumford and Sons

Risk it All – Mono Inc.

Crossfire – Stephen

Natural – Imagine Dragons

I Apologize – Five Finger Death Punch

Bad Dream – Ruelle

Control – Halsey

Bad Man – Esterly

Run Boy Run – Woodkid

Empty Crown – YAS

I’ll Be Good – Jaymes Young

Iron – Woodkid

All The Kings Horses – Karmina

Same Mistake – James Blunt

Battle Cry – Beth Crowley

Casualty – Hidden Citizens (S8)

Find You – Ruelle (to Yara S8 E1)

Remembrance – Tommee Profitt ( S7/8 to Sansa)

There’s a Hero in You – Tommee Profitt

Fear Not This Night – Freya Catherine (S8 E2)

Monster – Imagine Dragons

Welcome Home, Son – Radical Face (Sansa Theon Reunion S8 E2)

Everything Costs – Radical Face

Blood on My Name – The Brothers Bright

Brienne of Tarth

Nothing Left – Beth Crowley (to Jamie S8)

You’re Somebody Else – flora cash (to Jamie S8)

Bring Me Back to Life – Ht Bristol (S8 E2 to Jamie)

Warrior – Beth Crowley (to Jamie)

Wicked Game – Ursine Vulpine (to Jamie)

Weight – Crywolf (to Jamie)

Meet Me on the Battlefield – SVRCINA

Soldier – Fleurie

Something Wild – Lindsey Stirling

Lover. Fighter. – SVRCINA

Fear Not This Night – Freya Catherine (S8 E2)

Petyr Baelish

Who Are You, Really? – Mikky Ekko

Whose Side Are You On – Ruelle

Natural – Imagine Dragons

Blame – Bastille

The Devil Within – Digital Daggers

Other Characters

Onward and Upward – Tommee Profitt (Tommen Baratheon)

White Blank Page – Mumford and Sons (Jorah Mormont)

Soldier – Fleurie (Jorah Mormont)

~ Last Updated 05.02.2020

~ Chaolskingdom

[coolcoolkerberos]

Rating Side’s Playlists: Janus

Aka I say Vibes 30 times, these aren’t in order

- Come Little Children by Erutan

Disney villain vibes

Evil motherly song, guiding through the dark

“It must be this way” MY FUCKING FEELINGS

Haunting, I love it

7/10, get’s kinda repetitive

- You’re a Cad by the bird and a bee

Oh boy I’ve been hearing this one is about Virgil

First lyric screams “betrayal”

JAZZ VIBES YESSSSSS

A sort of ‘they’ll see through your lies’

“I should be better, but I’m worse” JANUS MISSES VIRGIL MY HEART

“You’re reckless with my heart, still I wait by the fire, I won’t ever get smart”

10/10 I added it to my playlist

- Denial by the Vaccines

Oooo dark vibes

“I know the world is in your hands” Janus calling out someone’s power?

“Please do my turn the light out, oh I don’t think the conversations over” Major SvS Redux vibes

Chill beats

The song is like someone speaking from your head and saying you’re denying your head from information

“I know where you want to go, oh I do, but do you?”

9/10, meaningful

- Mandy Goes To Med School by the Dresden Dolls

OOOOO MORE JAZZ VIBES

I love the piano in this song

I don’t even know what this song is about, I just think it’s neat

Her voice gets a bit annoying but then it gets good

“I’ve been dying to find out the hard way” idk but this lyric SLAPS

“I’ll burn that bridge when I get to it” (KILLER PIANO ENTERS)

8/10 to my playlist thing song goes

- Razzle Dazzle from Chicago

I’ve never listened to Chicago so here we go

Janus loves Jazz TM

“How can they see with sequence in their eyes?” ooooo

“Razzle Dazzle them and they’ll beg ya for more”

why does this seem like Janus telling Virgil he’s tricking everyone else with a friendly disguise?

I’m pretty sure this song is about prostitution

I know this song is supposed to be about disguising bland things with stupid amounts of show, but it gives off the vibe Janus is horny

6/10 just because I thought the song was SUPER repetitive

- Into the Unknown by the Blasting Company

I see over the garden wall (but I never watched it)

Same vibes as Come Little Children

“All that is lost is revealed” OOOO

Singer has rich voice I love it

7/10 I wanted more

- Don’t Tell Mama from Cabaret

Why do I get poor unfortunate souls vibes?

Song about lying about where you are (What Janus thinks Virgil is thinking?)

“I'm breaking every promise that I gave her, so won't you kindly do a girl a great big favor?” Major betrayal vibes

Lying to eachother is a big theme in this song

9/10 TO MY PLAYLIST YOU GO

- It Seemed The Better Way by Leonard Cohen

Again: evil vibes

DEEP VOICES

“Sounded like the truth, seemed the better way. Sounded like tha truth, but it’s not the truth today.” DAMN

This is more on the lying side of Janus

Violins are GOD TIER

7/10 I love the OoooOOOoooo-ing

- Talking at the Same Time by Tom Waits

Jazz Boys Assemble

Subtle trumpets, good beat

Again: MAJOR SvS REDUX VIBES

Kind of silent drunk ranting vibes

“You got to build your nest high enough to ride out the flood”

8/10 voice is annoying at points but it works well

- Anywhere by the Scarring Party

MORE JAZZ!!!! (Kind of Hadestown vibes)

I can’t understand the singer but it’s fun

Lots of dramas and flair

5/10 I couldn’t understand, but the music slapped

- Change by Lana Del Rey

I’ve never listened to a single Lana Del Rey song so this will be fun

Angst-y

“I’ve been thinking it’s just someone else’s job to care, but who am I? To try?” JANUS STOP BREAKING MY HEART

“Change is a powerful thing, I feel a coming in me.”

Janus would most likely try learning this song on piano

ABSOLUTELY HEARTBREAKING HOLY SHIT

9/10 Haunting, and I love it

- As Far as I Can See by Phantogram

Jazz/Techo? Hell yeah.

I really can’t tell if my phone is glitching of if it’s this song

“As far as I can see, nobody loves me. As far as I can tell, nobody loves you either.” OOP

“As far as I can see, nobody’s listening. As far as I can tell, nobody’s listening to me” SvS VIBES

7/10 confusing but catchy

- I Put a Spell On You by Nina Simone

afsgafafsha JANUS IS A HOCAS POCUS FAN

Jazz Vibes, I love her voice

“You know I can’t stand it, you’re running around” VIRGIL ANGST

6/10 I NEED MORE

- All the Good Girls Go to Hell by Billie Ellish

Fun Fact: I thought Billie was a male white 33 year old country singer until I heard this song a couple of months ago

“Once you get inside em, got friends but can’t invite em.” JANUS AND REMUS BEING CAST AWAY BY EVERY OTHER SIDE

“When the water starts to rise, and heaven’s out of sight, she’ll want the devil on her team” SvS REDUX VIBESSSSSS

“You’re cover up, is caving in, man is such a fool why are we saving him? Poisioning themselves now. Begging for our help? Wow.” I JUST ASDFGHJKL

10/10 I love this song for Janus, and I just love this song in general

- Evil Night Together by Jill Tracy

Man Janus just loves those jazz songs

Evil voices? We love it

“Let sway away the hours, let’s spend an evil night together” Janus, I just- I- why is he horny

“Who’s gonna make you a hero? Who’s gonna blow you away?” BETRAYAL VIBES

I just LOVE HOW THE MUSIC BUILDS TENSION

7/10 gets repetitive at the end, but I love this song

- Bladk Hole Sun from Scott Brandlee’s Post Modern Jukebox

Oooo is this jazz or classical

It’s jazz

Her voice is so beautiful

“Black Hole Sun, won’t you come, and wash away the rain?”

More major keys then other songs

INSTRAMENTAL SLAPS

10/10 I have no criticisms

- When the Chips are Down from Hadestown

Asdfashdhahesksksk I KNEW HADESTOWN WOULD BE HERE

Very different from the broadway version in voices, but I think it works for Janus

PIANO BREAK (jams)

“Aim for the heart, shoot to kill, if you don’t do it then the other one will” VIRGIL

“The first shall be first, and the last shall be last. Cast your eyes to heaven: you get a knife in the BACK”

8/10 I love this song but the voices don’t do it for me

- Devil in the Details by Bright Eyes

The voice? SLAPS

“Now you have your cake, don’t hesitate. Come on just do it.”

“There’s no backing out. This is gonna be reality, you can never dream it down.” DAMN

The strings? SLAPS

Angst TM

The guitar? SLAPS

“If there’s still time to turn around, I’m going too” SvS REDUX!!! VIBES!!!

Another 10/10

- Criminal by Fiona Apple

Evil jazzzzzzzz

“When a girl will break a boy just because she can”

Her voice is amazing, and it works well with the tone

“I got a lot to loose, and I’m betting high, so I’m begging you.” SvS vibes!!! (Not redux tho)

I really think Thomas, Joan, and Tayln knew what the fuck they were doing with this song and causing chaos with the Janus and Virgil shippers (yes they exist)

7/10 the ending wanted to be a fade out but it didn’t really work

- Trust in Me from the Jungle Book

Oh Jesus

Ooo opening just BURSTS through the door

Scarlett Johansson didn’t have to go this smooth but she did and I love her for it

MORE EVIL JAZZ

I like this take on the song, gives it more evil mom energy

10/10 I just- amazing

And that’s the end, Janus’ playlist overall is a 8/10

[nightcoremoon]

here's some controversy that has nothing to do with social issues.

a lot of people hate the band five finger death punch. saying those words provoked a visceral response in half the people reading this, and a "who?" in the other half. they're a groove metal band; similar to slipknot, mudvayne, disturbed, all that remains, system of a down, korn, and killswitch engage. they're one of those really controversial bands that are hated because they're ~not real metal~ by dumbshits who think that NWOBHM is the only valid metal genre. even though england ruined metal and punk but that's a conbfetsation for another day.

now, if you just don't like metal, that's fine. I don't expect everyone to like every genre. so obviously you won't like them, or any band in the genre. obviously. and these are not the people who are being targeted with this post. no, this goes to those who love metallica, ozzy, megadeth, slayer, pantera, testament, opeth, tool, manowar, meshuggah, children of bodom, cannibal corpse, fear factory, mercyful fate: this is to the people who love metal. now, I say this as one of us, but metalheads are one of the most judgmental groups of people in history. and frequently I find that metalheads make the same remarks in regards to their opinions on five finger death punch.

they do nothing but covers. they just yell and cuss. forty year old men with teenage angst. bad musicianship. they look stupid. they fuck their sisters and daughters. they sold out to the military. they're gay. they do too many ballads. they're redneck bait. they're toxic masculinity and macho personified. they rely on guest stars to carry their songs. they're talentless hacks.

these are all complaints I've heard multiple times from multiple people. and frankly I'm sick of it. I'm sick of hearing the bullshit complaints rather than the ACTUAL REASONS why they aren't the best band in the world. which I'll go through now.

they have an overreliance on breakdowns as if they were a post-hardcore band but they're not. breaking benjamin also skirts the line between post-grunge metal and post-hardcore and have many breakdowns, but the difference is that BB's breakdowns have math rock roots and use different patterns that syncopate well. five finger's breakdowns are... eighth notes. it's the difference between, say, black veil brides- who have excellent syncopated breakdowns- and as I lay dying, who have shitty and boring breakdowns. the only difference is that AILD has blast beats (and is fronted by an abusive asshole), and five finger has... ivan growling threats or whatever because they think that it sounds cool to have metal blaring while he says shit like "you wanna disrespect me? I will slap you so fucking hard you'll feel like you kissed a freight train, fuck you," or "if there was ever a time for you to back the fuck up it's right fuckin here and right fuckin now" or "it's not the size of the dog in the fight it's the size of the fight in the dog," or "in the end we're all just chalk lines on the concrete, drawn only to be washed away; in the time that I've been given, I am what I am", etc, all preceding screams. and no these are not exaggerations, these are literally exact quotes. there's also one that plays radio chatter from the military while he goes "hut hut oorah", which is different slightly. and in any case, they have done nearly a hundred different solos over their career, there is NO REASON for them to have such a ridiculous amount of breakdowns. they rival memphis may fire in that regard, but MMF actually has great breakdowns. churko is a metal producer, NOT a hardcore producer, and they sound empty when you strip out the vocals.

sometimes they will overuse a chorus, and hit the pop music pitfalls of having a song that's over half chorus. I'm sure they did this so the label would be happy with singles because the music industry is a commercialized garbage fire and holding it against the artists would be so fucking stupid especially since tool (the best metal band in existence) fucking said it best, "all you know about me is what I sold you, I sold out long before you ever knew my name, I sold my soul to make a record, dipshit, then you bought one; I've got some advice for you little buddy, before you point your finger you should know that I'm the man and if I'm the man then he's he man and you're the man as well so you can take that fucking finger and shove it up your ass". translation; the fact that you know a band at all means that they sold out to even exist in the first place because that's what selling out is. so even this complaint I have that sometimes they have repeated chorus is more of a complaint about a music industry which dumbs things down to sell radioplay to the lowest common denominator, which EVERY SINGLE ARTIST IS GUILTY OF. so moving on.

sometimes they'll have songs which are fairly simple from a harmonic/mechanical standpoint. opening verse chorus verse chorus solo bridge chorus chorus ending. verse goes some mix of eighth and quarter notes and rests in 4:4, solo is just the vocal line of the chorus, bass and drums are nonexistent and only serve to be a melodic backbone, and the music only exists to serve the lyrics... oh wait I can make the exact same arguments about metallica, rage against the machine, pantera, disturbed, and a hundred other bands. those guys aren't hated as much as five finger. hmm. wonder why.

the lyrics are often angsty. namely that they deal with honor, government corruption, mental illness, we live in a society, religious corruption, abandonment issues, recovering from toxic relationships, hey wait a minute these are all just insanely common topics for metal songs!

they usually play in the same key- wait shit every band has a favored key.

they do a lot of covers- wait shit they have literally more ALBUMS than covers.

(yeah that's weird to me too, but they only did a new level by pantera, from out of nowhere by faith no more, bad company by bad company, mama said knock you out by LL cool J, house of the rising sun by the animals, gone away by offspring, and blue on black by kenny wayne shepard... that's 7. they have 8 albums now.)

so shut the fuck up forever about the cover songs. metallica and the deftones and a perfect circle all had fucking cover ALBUMS, van halen only has a career because of the kinks, and every single rock band in the world is just ripping off the beatles, pink floyd, black sabbath, the who, led zeppelin, and cream. pick a legitimate reason to hate on a band, hypocrite.

alright what else...

"they're gay"

I'm not gonna dignify that with a response.

"they suck"

so does your favorite band. boom roasted.

"they're bad at music"

I'd like to see you do better then.

"they sold out to the military"

no they support the veterans and the troops; they fucking hate the military if you pay any attention at all. they believe in the good parts of the military that the government pays half our taxes to make us believe. you're not better than anyone else just because you see through one specific piece of propaganda because odds are you're blinded by another dozen. they write songs about how war is hell and how when vets come home they should be treated better. and anyway when you're in the dog eat dog world of the music industry hey guess what you need a market to sell to or else it's back to baskin robbins. I don't blame them for one second. if I had the option of endorsing cops to pay my bills you bet your ass I'll fly a blue lives matter flag and sell my soul to make money, and then donate shit to the black lives matter movement. flying a flag is worthless if I can do actual good with the money that those dumbasses send in. and name better irony than fighting to abolish a group that pays me to do it go on I'll wait.

"you're just a fanboy"

a) it's fangirl but metal elitists don't give a shit about the LGBTQ and b) just because I like a band doesn't in any way diminish the validity of my statements and any bias I might have is easily countered by whatever bias you might have and c) they're not even my favorite band you idiot I just think there's way worse out there just like I think it's unfair to say nickelback is the worst band in existence when drunk mom rock like hinder buckcherry savingabel and kidrock exists, and limp bizkit is standing right there, and d) they're not even the worst groove metal band, just look at fucking lamb of god, and e) if I was a fangirl I wouldn't have pointed out the flaws you fucking brainless troglodyte, and f) even if they were my favorite band in the world it doesn't matter if you think they suck because music taste is subjective anyway you goddamn moron. those guys write their own music, play their own music, perform their own music, and they love their fanbase more than most other bands. andrew biersack and kellin quinn and pepper keenan and glenn danzig and liam gallagher and axl rose and van halen and ted nugent and kurt cobain HATE their fans, or at least are huge fucking assholes. but not five finger. jeremy played until he literally broke his back; he's as devoted as phil collins, and if he made like atreyu and sang while drumming he'd be singing from a wheelchair, or like dave grohl when he broke his leg right in the middle of a concert, went to the hospital and got set and put in a cast, THEN CAME RIGHT BACK TO THE FUCKING SHOW AND PLAYED GUITAR AND SANG IN A CAST AND WHEELCHAIR. oh but wait, people say phil collins and dave grohl suck too, and turn around and suck mustaine's dick even though he's the biggest asshole in thrash metal behind tom araya and drunk james hetfield. point being, just because x doesn't like y doesn't diminish z's opinion.

"the singer fucked his daughter lol lol his grandchild is his son too lol lol his daughter is his wife lol lol it's funny because rednecks and incest lol lol" he's from colorado not alabama you dumb motherfuckers, and all the lol incest in georgia jokes are rooted in good ol yankee classism. also the guitarist is hungarian so the american redneck jokes don't even fuckin work. shut the hell up, you have all of the intellectual capacity of a common bog leech.

you can dislike the band. you can say you don't like it. you can say that you'd rather listen to different music. that's fine! that's okay! listen to justin bieber if you like him, listen to taylor swift if you like her, listen to new kids on the block if you want! I don't care! but stop expressing your opinions that you stole from someone else as fact. all you're doing is meme bandwagoning so you can find a community because you don't have the social skills necessary to meet people through the things you love so instead you try to pull serotonin out of making other people feel as miserable as you do.

with that being said, fuck all of the annoying dudebro douchebags who listen to the band and show 5FDP next to the confederate flag, blue lives matter flag, don't tread on me flag, punisher skull, trump sticker, and the crossed assault rifles on the back of your truck. you're all shit for reasons other than your music taste.

[jazy3]

Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 16X10

So, I watched the Grey’s Anatomy Station 19 Crossover Premiere over the weekend. I have to say overall I really liked it! The pacing of Station 19 was a bit slow for me but other than that it was great! The fast paced Grey’s Anatomy episodes are my favourite! So I really liked this one. My heart went out to Bailey in these episodes. All the Ben and Bailey moments and they’re excitement over the new baby made me cry. Poor Bailey. She loses her pregnancy, almost loses her husband, and then her residents’ lives are left hanging in the balance. In the aftermath of the crash, Helm needs surgery; Schmitt collapses; Simms needs major facial and neurosurgery, and Parker goes AWOL and needs treatment. 

I really like Meredith’s monologue in this episode. Being the best really is a catch 22. The amazing thing is no one else can do what you do. The terrible thing is no one else can do what you do. I loved the moment between Bailey and Schmitt in the supply closet. In other news, Jo totally stole that baby! Her drunken panicking about the cops is hilarious. But then we find out it’s only Meredith. Crisis averted! And she’s got wine! She came to drink with Alex because quote “Cristina sent an obnoxious Irishman as a gift” and he stole Alex’s old job. I love her. Never change Mer. Never change. 

I loved her line, “That’s what I said when I stole a baby,” about Zola and Link’s response, “Why are people stealing babies?” Mer gets it. Link is confused. To be honest Jo talking to the baby in a baby voice about how Meredith is a convicted felon is everything. Cut to the hospital where Amelia and Tom are bantering back and forth. I love their banter. Amelia is looking for Maggie because she just found out that Link might not be the father only to find out from Tom that Maggie quit. Yikes! 

And as usual DeLuca mouths off to his superiors and defies orders before being put promptly in his place. How is he still Chief Resident and why does he still work here? In real life that would get you fired real fast. Parker’s storyline this episode got me hard. I really like him and watching him repeat the same thing over and over again while he suffered from PTSD and head trauma was heartbreaking. I’m glad they got him the help he needed in the end. Bailey’s line, “Wouldn’t be the first time,” about her residents really got me. RIP George O’Malley. I still miss his character.

We all deserve a partner as amazing as Ben Warren. My god that man is supportive. His wife just suffered a miscarriage, he’s suffering the loss of a child, and he’s not okay, but he puts all that aside for Bailey’s sake because as he says to Webber, “Miranda comes first,” That’s true love right there. Side note: I like that Amelia and Teddy are becoming friends. I’m over this whole women on women hating each other over a man thing. That always pissed me about Addison and Meredith. Meredith never intentionally did anything to her and Addison was the one that cheated yet she treated Meredith like crap. 

Eventually Jo does in fact take the baby she stole to the hospital’s nursery and in walks not her husband, but Dr. Cormac Hayes! Cristina’s Yang’s present, the new Chief of Peds, and Meredith’s new love interest. Swoon! Oh course, Jo is a weird hot mess because she’s drunk haha. Watching Hayes check the baby out using technical terms while using a baby voice so as not to scare him warms my heart. I loved Jo’s line, “Oh you’re him!” when she figured out who Hayes was and then tried to hide it so as not to scare him off. I feel like that’s going to be an ongoing plot point and I’ll be interested to see how he finds out that and how he reacts to being brought to Grey Sloan on false pretenses and the fact that all of Meredith’s friends went along with it.

The scenes with Jo and Cormac in the nursery are very revealing. He’s comments imply that he might have worked for Cristina previously which is interesting and thickens the plot considerably. I really like Hayes as a character so far. He checks all the right boxes and in his interactions with Jo this week we got some more insight into his character. Hayes is shown to be competent at his job and as someone who is willing to roll with the punches. He feels compassionate towards others in difficult situations, which includes both scared birth mothers and safe haven volunteers, and doesn’t judge them or their choices. 

What Jo initially thinks is a bad idea turns out to be rather genius. Hayes advocates for the baby hatch/box/chute because it gives birth mothers who are scared and frighten a safe way to help the child they’ve given birth to have a better life and know that they will be taken care of. They help hospital staff help those babies the best way they can. Hayes recognizes that that’s what Jo is trying to do to for this particular baby and is sympathetic. Already that puts him leagues above most of the other men on Grey’s especially with Alex MIA. 

I’m also excited by the prospect of finally seeing Meredith date somehow her friends and family like and who has the potential to be a real partner to her and a real stepfather to her children. They’ve established that Cormac has teenage sons of his own which means there’s the potential there for their kids to interact and to see Meredith and Hayes re-build their lives together and merge their families. That’s way more interesting to me than the whole ‘love interest of the week’ thing they’ve been trotting out for the last little while.

It’s true that Hayes is obnoxious and arrogant at time, but the show has also established that he’s got the skills to match and can admit when he’s wrong. Before the break we saw how he was impressed by Meredith’s skills, but not intimidated or jealous of her and that is exactly what Meredith needs. Someone whose on her level and who gets it, but who understands that he can’t possibly compete with her because she’s just that good. 

I was really worried when Schmitt collapsed in the OR. I’m glad he made it. I loved Mer and Schmitt’s banter afterwards. She’s got all the jokes. I’m not an Owen fan and these days I’m not much of a Jackson fan, but his line to Owen was EPIC! “I figured ‘cause you have two kids together, you live together, you marry everyone, but I guess you have been busy haven’t you?” Jackson spilling the tea! 

In other news, I still hate DeLuca with the passion three thousand burning suns. He’s assigned to help Elliot, the patient whose heart hasn’t restarted whose wife just had a premature baby and he spends the whole time acting like all of it is beneath him. God what an ass. He breaks up with Mer over his own insecurities and then instead of apologizing like Link told him to he mopes around the hospital and stares at her creepily and then texts her the next day wanting to talk. Ugh. Also, I hate that he calls her Mer. 

That’s what her friends and family call her. DeLuca barely knows her. From the minute he took an interest in her and she indicated that she might like him back he started acting like they were madly in love and acting like they’d known each other and been together for years when they’d barely been dating a few weeks and she was adamant he wasn’t her boyfriend. God I hate this guy so much. He’s such a loser. Can they just write him off already so Mer can live her life in peace? In happier news, I was ecstatic when Elliott’s heart started beating again! His poor wife. And then we’re back to Jo and Hayes. The baby’s good to go but he sees how attached she is so he suggests they wait a while longer before calling social services. 

We also learn some important information about Hayes in this scene. We learn he’s a father to two teenage boys and was in residency when his boys were infants. We also learn that Hayes is a member of the ‘it’s okay to steal cute babies’ club! He’ll fit right in with Mer and Jo! Although maybe not with Link. I really love Link and Jo’s friendship and the scene at the end with them was super cute. I loved how Richard was there for Bailey in the OR when she needed him. I’m happy that they’re friends again. Poor Bailey the scene with her and Richard in the OR made me cry. She’s not fine. “She just was. And now she isn’t.”

Admittedly, I don’t like Owen as a character but that was a good save with Simms! If he hadn’t caught that Simms would be dead. After the surgery is complete Jackson and Owen talk to Simms’ Grandmother where they learn that when Koracick moved to Seattle and wanted Simms with him he paid for his grandmother to move there too. I loved their exchange. “You know how emotional he is.” “Koracick? Of course, yeah super emotional guy.” LOL. But seriously though that was really sweet of him. He’s an ass, but he’s an ass that cares when it counts. 

I like that Koracick thanked Owen and shook his hand. That was good of him. If the situation was reversed I don’t know if Owen would do the same. The Schmico scene at the end was cute! I think there’s an interesting parallel here between the Schmico scene and that Calzona scene from several seasons back. And just then, Hayes is standing at a nurses station, when Meredith comes around the corner! Squee! 

Straight up, Meredith and Hayes were in a scene together for all of 5 seconds this episode and they had flat out more chemistry than her and DeLuca have ever had! Or most of her other recent love interests more that matter. I said what I said. They talk for a few minutes and then Hayes walks off to go do something. At which point Jo walks up to Mer and says, “I have to say I kinda see it.” Jo Karev: A woman after my own heart! Sing it sister! Grayes all the way! 

Meredith is displeased as she finds him obnoxious to which Jo replies, “Don’t be mad at me. He’s Yang’s gift.” Haha I love it! I want my best friend to send me a man. Anyone else? In other news, Owen finally proposes to Teddy! I’m not a towen shipper, but I have to say this proposal was really sweet. Amelia decides to learn from her mistakes and tell Link the truth only to have Owen and Teddy announce their engagement right in front of them! Yikes! 

And Koracick sees the whole thing from a far. Oh boy. RIP Tomaltman? Korackman? Whatever we were calling it it’s dead now. Amelia can’t bring herself to come clean after that and who can blame her? I wouldn’t be able to either. So instead she tells Link they’re having a boy Oh boy. Here we go again. We then cut away from the hospital to find Maggie drunk and passed out on the couch. Oh dear. 

Someone won’t stop knocking at the door so she gets up to answer it. And look who it is. It’s none other than her ex DeLuca. Man this guy is the gift that keeps on giving! He tells her that Elliot’s heart restarted which is nice of him. He should have stopped there and left. Instead he asks if they can talk and Maggie being grateful let’s him in. He then proceeds to complain to his ex-girlfriend whose obviously hurting about how he blew it with her older sister. 

God this guy is such an ass! He breaks up with Mer over his own insecurities and then has the audacity to go to his ex whose her sister and ask for advice to win her back while Maggie herself is hurting. Screw this guy! Then he tries to act like he didn’t break up with Meredith while also admitting that he meant what he said. Wow. He’s both a gaslighter and a complete idiot. As Maggie says he, “Hurt someone whose had more than enough hurt for a lifetime.” Maggie gets it and DeLuca needs to get the hell out. 

He keeps talking about how he wants to undo the hurt he’s caused as if they got into a minor fight. Buddy. You don’t undo it you idiot you just move on and let Meredith and her sisters live their lives and leave them alone you jackass! And as if DeLuca’s idiocy isn’t bad enough, we then find out that Maggie’s being sued for wrongful death for what happened with Sabrina. 

Also how does DeLuca not comprehend that someone with the last name Webber is related to Richard and Maggie? Man, this guy is dumb. We then cut back to the hospital to find Bailey alone in her office, but not for long. Richard and Meredith come to her office to comfort her. Mer brings her tissues and donuts and holds her hand while she tells her that, “I had a miscarriage once. I never felt so lonely.” God Grey’s just break my heart why don’t you? And then everyone laughs about the donuts Meredith brought. My heart.

Well that was intense! Now onto next week’s promo! Oooooh and it looks like things are heating up between Mer and Hayes! In the bad news column, it looks like DeLuca continues to try and gaslight Mer with the whole ‘I didn’t dump you, you just interpreted it that way’ thing and it looks like Mer is having none of it thank god! In other news it looks like Teddy somehow lost her engagement ring and Amelia finally comes clean with Link! Can’t wait!

Until next time! 

[hilllsnholland]

Bucket List - (2)

Pairing: College!Tom x Deaf!Reader

W.c: 2.9k 

Warnings: swears, alcohol, slurs 

Summary: Ice cream really cures the soul 

Disclaimer: This is all written from my perspective as a Deaf/HoH person. If you have comments, questions, or concerns then you are welcome to message me :) 

The only thing Creekview had to offer was the sun. In London, the sun was a distant cousin that came around only when it benefited themselves. As much as Tom loathed the small college town, he loved the weather. He loved the sun beating down his neck while he sat outside Milky, serving ice cream to the somewhat pleasant residents of Creekview.

Milky was what Creekview was known for. It was a small drive-thru or walk up shop that served ice cream and other snacks. On the side of the building, there’s a beautiful mural of cows eating ice cream, looking out to the observer with blank expressions. Every day Tom patted each painted cow on the head on his way to his shift. A good luck sort of thing. It was needed though as the lines and customers got crazy as the temperature rose.

“Fuck this,” Brant spat as he wiped his forehead again. “They can’t even buy us an outdoor fan? Cheap ass white people.”

Tom tries to ignore him and enjoy the feeling of heat on his skin. The Brit tilts his sunglasses up on his face so that Brant can’t tell he’s in another headspace. The party still absorbed his mind. It had been three days since that night but he hadn’t stopped thinking of Y/N. When he got bored he fingerspelled his name like Y/N did. As soon as he got home that night he went online and practiced basic signs. Things like ‘hello’ ‘how are you’ ‘bathroom’ were now part of his vocabulary. It wasn’t much but it would be a gesture of willingness. All Tom wanted was to see her hands move again.  

“I heard you hooked up with that pink haired chick.” Brant smugly says as he leans against the walk-up counter.

“No-”

“I saw her too. Looked like a wild one huh? I bet she’s hella freaky with that pink hair and shit.”

“Nothing happened. We kissed. She left. End of story.”

“Left you blue balling and shit? Sorry man,” Brant slaps Tom on the shoulder and smacks his lips. “I thought your British accent would help you pull but you keep striking out.”

Tom doesn’t respond. He spells his name again and goes through the alphabet to keep his mind at peace. The only good quality thing about Brant was that he was a talker. He could keep a conversation going for hours, but he mostly talked to hear his own voice. Tom could never say a word and Brant wouldn’t even notice.

“Ty got fucked up though. Kevin laid him out flat.” Brant snickers and eyes a few girls walking across the street.

“You told him to say that though, right? You set him up for it.” Tom narrows his eyes on the ground while Brant shifts his weight towards him.

“Hell yeah I did. You got a problem with that?”

Brant adjusts himself to stand straight. He was trying to be an alpha male alright, he was half a foot taller than Tom. Brant puffs out his chest but Tom does not give him the time of day. He knew his dirty work. He knew that Brant was a manipulative asshole, and sadly he was drawn into that culture. Times like this he really misses London. The guys there were assholes too, but this was a new breed of fuckery.

It seems like the div had found something else to be interested in because Brant was now flirting with a girl standing at the counter to order something. Tom went back to his original position of leaning on the wall behind him, his sunglasses tilting off the top of his nose. His mind went back to its usual job of putting Y/N in the center stage of his thoughts. God, if he’s on autopilot then he’s probably thinking about her. It was one meeting and he was hooked on it. He even approached LJ to ask her more that night.

*

LJ was in the midst of refilling the keg, her eyes locked on Harrison as he talks to a group of girls in his Sociology class. Tom had come up behind her hoping for answers. It was her party after all. She seemed to know everyone in this godforsaken town. LJ jumps when she sees Tom but settles with a laugh, hitting him on the shoulder.

“Scared me lovey.” She sloppily says.

“Do you know a Y/N?” Tom is quick with words while Lauren takes a second to think.

“Maybe?”

“She’s Deaf.”

“Oh, Y/N. Yes, I do.” LJ laughs and turns the nozzle of the keg back on. “I met her a while back at another party. She used to go to that Deaf school a few hours away.”

LJ shrugs and gulps down another solo cup full of beer. Tom wondered if he should ask more about her, but would that come off creepy? They didn’t seem like friends, but LJ is the type to gossip a bit. Lauren turns to Tom and looks as if she had come to an epiphany. Her hand caresses Tom’s cheek softly and she flattens her lips.

“That look on your face,” She purrs and drags her nail across his mouth.

“LJ, you’re drunk.” Tom tries to break the tension but she keeps staring on.

“So are you, but you’re...you got that happy look Tommy,” She’s not very coherent as she sways back and forth. “That same look I get when I see Haz…”

Her face becomes more flushed than usual as she breaks out into a fit of giggles. Her hand leaves his face as she turns back around to refill her cup. LJ wipes her face lazily and clears her throat.

“Tommy, be careful baby,” Her voice is shallow in her throat. “Y/N, she’s a different kind of girl. The kind to break your heart.”

LJ spins the contents of her drink around in the cup as she sways. Tom watches her face drop, the look of knowing more but not saying it. Although he wanted to push, there was something eating at him to not do it. Maybe it was self-destruction, but her warning didn’t persuade him any different. He still wanted to talk to Y/N. Learn her story, more than the gossip LJ would have.

“How would you know?” Tom defensively says and grabs the cup from LJ’s hand. “Did you hear that from your dumb rumormongers?”

She doesn’t react right away. LJ hums as her hand squeezes the air the cup had once occupied. Her eyes are sad as she looks back at Tom, almost pitying him. Was this a sick joke?

“Behind every rumor is a little bit of truth. Even if it’s twisted, Tom,”

*

There’s a loud ringing and Tom snaps from his thoughts. It was the customer bell from the counter. Brant was nowhere to be seen, possibly in the back trying to get away from the heat. Tom shakes his head and walks up to the counter with his fake smile ready to greet whatever Creekview trash would walk up.

“Welcome to Milky-” Tom stops and gapes at the two girls standing in front of him.

It was Y/N, staring with huge eyes, and her friend from before who was blinking rapidly. The friend laughs awkwardly, elbowing Y/N, and signs something Tom has not yet learned. Y/N scatters to reply but keeps an eye on Tom while she’s responding. Tom raises his hand and tries to sign, ‘nice to meet you’ while mouthing his words. The friend cackles through her accent, signing something back.

“Sorry, I’m trying to learn,” Tom says while trying to sign.

“You’re alright. We’re just...surprised to see you.” Y/N says while simultaneously signing. “Tom right?”

His name on her hands looks just as beautiful as before. Tom nods and fingerspells Y/N’s name slowly. She smiles, nodding her head and motioning the sign, ‘right’. The friend coughs, pointing to the orange ice cream picture on the counter.

“Oh right sorry,” Tom shakes his head and nods. “Can I get you guys anything?”

“My friend here,” Y/N elbows her friend and fingerspells her name. “Tejas, she wants an orange swirl. I’ll take a Coke Diablo.”

Tom’s mouth feels dry and he can’t form a sign that would be correct in the situation. In his awkward mess of nerves, he stumbles away and into Milky to grab their order. He mumbled to himself as he makes their ice cream, his mind and mouth moving in two different speeds. What could he say to her? Maybe he needs to learn more sign before talking to her? It was a mess, all the little Toms in his head were setting things on fire. Next thing he knew he felt the cold, sticky mess of ICEE on his hand. He grabbed a towel and cleaned up the mess, setting himself straight before going back out there.

With an adjustment to his sunglasses and a mental pep talk, Tom walked back out to the girls. He handed them both their treats, earning a ‘thank you’ from Y/N and a condescending smile from Tejas. She was analyzing him, signing about him when he was right there. Although Tom wasn’t fluent, he could tell she was being snarky.

“$8.64,” Tom says and then watches Tejas sign something. “What is she saying?”

Y/N hands him a ten while signing back to her friend, contorting her face into a scrunched up expression.

“She keeps calling you ‘Hearing Boy’,” Y/N explains then fingerspells his name again. “She’s not very open to hearing people,”

“Why not?”

Y/N interprets the conversation which makes Tejas make a noise that was similar to honking. Her head shakes from side to side as her hands move rapidly, the ice cream swaying side to side and dripping down the cone.

“She says all you hearing people do is make fun of her.” Y/N slyly points behind Tom to where Brant has reappeared. “Your friend there has called her retarded since she moved here,”

Yet again Tom’s biggest weakness was who he allowed to be associated with. It wasn’t a surprise, Brant was a lowlife who would stoop to slurs like that. Tom felt a fire bubbling under his skin, god he wanted to knock him out but Brant was double his size and weight. He shakes his head and exhales.

“Brant is an idiot. A fucking div,” Tom hands Y/N back her money. “But we’re not all like that. Some of us want to understand Deaf people,”

Y/N watches his mouth move and smiles. Tejas looks lost and huffs against her ice cream. She could see what was forming and she was not happy about it. Tom met Y/N’s gaze and raised his hand to try to sign to her.

“Your hair...beautiful,” He signs slowly.

Y/N runs a hand through the dyed hair and giggles nervously.

“It’s fake...all for that party.” She responds. “Do you have time to talk right now?”

Tom immediately signs yes, not caring about if Brant would need his help or not with the impending rush. Y/N signs something to Tejas, who rolls her eyes and then watches her friend walk around the corner with car keys in hand. Tom leads Y/N to the other side of the building where the murals were.

“So, how Deaf are you?” Tom says while dragging his hand across one of the painted cows. “You seem to carry a conversation pretty well,”

Y/N feigns a smile, inhaling harshly as she leans against the wall and slides down. Her arms are crossed over her chest as she looks up to Tom.

“I was born hearing. I was in a car accident when I was a kid, lost the majority of my hearing.” She points to her ears and shrugs. “I can follow along because I know what sounds are. I can read lips alright.”

Her body tenses as she looks towards the beating sun. It was high in the sky, perks of the long summer days. She squinted and held a hand up to block the sun. Without a second thought, Tom hands her his sunglasses and steps into the sunlight. She motions a thank you and puts them on. Tom couldn’t help but smile, she looked better in his glasses than he did.

“So, what happened at the party, that kiss?” Her words are shaky which she masks with awkward laughing. “It was great. I just don’t think you know what you’re getting into-”

“Are you talking about the rumors?”

“Which ones?” Y/N pushes back the fading pink strands and sighs. “There’s so many now. I don’t even care anymore,”

“Someone said you’ll break my heart,” Tom watches her face fall slightly. “But I’m looking for someone to ruin my life anyways.”

Y/N laughs, but this time it's a real laugh though. It came from the bottom of her stomach as if this was the first funny thing she heard in years. Maybe not heard, but you know the specifics are hard. Tom laughs, switching her weight so he’s leaning towards her.

“I think you’re cool Tom, especially with that accent I can’t hear.” Y/N tries to wink behind the glasses but it doesn’t really work. “I just don’t want you to expect much because we don’t know each other,”

“Can I get to know you?”

Y/N looks to him in surprise. There’s a long pause though, she doesn’t speak but she reaches inside of her backpack to find something. Tom isn’t sure if she’s handing him her number or a restraining order but she pulls out a piece of torn out paper. It’s folded perfectly, doodles on the corners of little turtles with sunglasses. He opens it and at the top of the page it says in big letters, ‘Summer Bucket List’.

“What’s this?”

“You want to get to know me right?” She stands and pushes the sunglasses down the bridge of her nose so her eyes are seductively pooling into his. “Read this, then next time we meet I’ll tell you the plan.”

Y/N places the sunglasses on Tom’s head, her other hand rests on the middle of his chest. She can feel the rhythm, fast and all for her. There’s a moment where everything is still, their lips so close from touching but uncertainty clouds the moment. It wasn’t right, Tom was sure of that. If he wanted to kiss her it had to be lead by her. Y/N puts her backpack back on and steps away.

“I’ll see you around,” She says then signs something new. “This is your name sign for now okay?”

She shows him, it’s the sign for ‘hearing’ but with a T hand shape. He smiles and repeats it. A name sign, something only given by Deaf people to their friends and family. Tom took this as a way of her promising to see him again. The list felt heavy in his hands as he watched her walk towards a beat up Cadillac on the corner driven by Tejas.

“How will I find you once I’m done reading this?” Tom yells down the street which causes a few Creekview residents to stop and stare.

“You can try to find me on social media or,” Tom can see her smirking playfully. “Or let fate decide. Your choice.”

Y/N enters the car and that’s the end of their meeting. Tejas whips the car from the space and drives away. The whole interaction felt like a dream. It did not feel real in a conceivable way. Tom looked to the list and back to the corner she was standing at before to make sure this was not a figment of his imagination. He unravels the list completely and was surprised to see only five.

Swim in Creek Lake

Easy enough. That was one of the most popular destinations during the summer. Creekview had a lake that was swarmed by people who were either swimming, tanning, or canoeing. Tom had yet to go into the water though, he usually did a hike around the hills behind the lake with Harrison.

    2. Watch a Drive-In movie

That was something he did not expect. Do Drive-Ins have captioned movies? Tom didn’t even know where they still had Drive-Ins. It had to be something he’d look up later.

   3. Go to DeckFest

Deckfest? The Deckfest? Also known as the Coachella for people who can not afford Coachella. A music festival between California and Nevada, held in a desert, with lesser-known names. It was a mix of Rolling Loud and Warp Tour.

   4. Win a fistfight

Y/N obviously had more layers that he was expecting. The fourth one made him laugh, folding the paper while smiling a little too much. Watching her fight? He’d pay money for that. Tom looks to the last one and drops a bit.

   5. Find my purpose

Tom’s heart panged as he read it over and over. He related to the last item, something he needed to figure out by August also. In the time where he needs to figure out his major, his future, he was more interested in reading this Bucket List and talking to Y/N. Maybe it was master procrastination, or maybe it would lead him to his final destination. Either way, Tom had his roadmap for the summer, all starting with Creek Lake.

///

///

Taglist: 

@screeching-student-unknown / @nyctophilicstyles /  @captainbuckyy / @vintage-moonlight / @breadbudzo / @h-natale / @originalpinkpowerranger/ @happywolves81 / @drunkgreek / @iamnida95 / @sydthekidsloth / @spiderboytotherescue / @laureharrier / @starksparker / @madon566 / @nophunleague / @itsbrittneynicole / @hereiamhereigo

[stfuisaac]

hello hello it’s lucky again and,, sadly,, we don’t have the technology that makes the thoughts we have just.... appear onto our screens yet... so this took a hot sec and still isn’t perfect bc i don’t plan on proofreading :\ but! here,, is,, my new,, drummer boy,, parumpumpumpum

‹ avan jogia, he/him, cis man, bisexual. › ISAAC BAROT is the TWENTY-SEVEN year old from SAN JOSE, CALIFORNIA. when a friend asked them what they thought of the manor they said,  ❝ I HEARD THIS IS WHERE THEY DECIDED TO MAKE THE TWILIGHT ZONE. ❞ they claim GET OUT is their favorite scary movie, and if they were to die in a horror film they would BE OBLIVIOUS TO THERE EVEN BEING A KILLER UNTIL IT’S TOO LATE. their fears include MANNEQUINS, HITCH-HIKERS and DYING WITH NOTHING TO SHOW, and they don’t know we know, but… HE GOT INTO A (MUTUALLY) NEAR FATAL ALTERCATION WITH A STRANGER HE GAVE A RIDE TO (YES, HE WAS AN UBER DRIVER - HIS GREATEST SHAME). hope they enjoy their stay. ‹ PLATANCHOR requested by JOAKIM from STRESSED OUT penned by, LUCKY, 20, EST. ›

QUICK FACTS:

full name: isaac benjamin barot

date of birth: september 12, 1992

*does not perfectly reflect the below Big Three zodiac chart because that’s so much math

zodiac big three: virgo sun, taurus moon, libra rising

gender & pronouns: cis man & he/him

sexual orientation: bisexual

occupation: session drummer + lyft driver + ex-uber driver

mbti: entp

enneagram: 5w6

the song i listen to on repeat while i write the intro: “deja vu” - roger waters

BACKGROUND INFO:

alright. so.

isaac's backstory is neither tragic nor easy. his father was an immigrant who married his mother solely to get a green card (y’all, to be fair... the citizenship tests are whack). there wasn’t any real romance between the two, but the drop-ins always said otherwise. no, outside of putting on a show for government officials, isaac’s father and mother were friends at the best of times.

the best of times culminated in a son who grew up in an interesting dynamic. his father and mother never even attempted to be anything more than friends (with, as you can see, the occasional benefits). after the check-ins finally stopped, his father and mother even began sleeping in different rooms. his mother would trade in her queen for a double and replace the space his father used to take up with his cradle.

it was nothing like the ‘unhappy marriage’ trope, though... again, because they barely ever pretended to be married. they would take their wedding rings off when they went out with friends. sometimes they would even take off their rings around each other and talk the other up to someone attractive.

so it was unorthodox, but it was much better than his parents pretending to be in love in that way and giving him a skewed version of what romance should look like.

one down-side to it, though, was that isaac never knew who he was supposed to go to for what. usually it’s just a given that “if you need/want x, go to the matriarch, if you need/want y, go to the patriarch” but... what happens... when your parents are basically just your friends?

so thank god for growing up in the age of technology. like,, ya,, a literal baby can’t google things like “how to say ‘mom’” but a 15y/o can google “how to shave”

so... ya... his parents were his friends, the internet was his parent(s?).

one thing the internet couldn’t do? give him drums. it could introduce him to the likes of ringo starr, john bonham, keith moon, and ginger baker, but it couldn’t give him drums... not when he was only, like... 10, at least.

so he put a set on his christmas wishlist and figured they would divide amongst themselves.

so ya, his 10th christmas, he got a shitty little rockwood hohner kit that he would use for the next nine years.

he never received any professional training. again, he didn’t know who to ask and... youtube wouldn’t exist for another three years. he tried to teach himself using a few books and, if nothing else, figured out a few simple beats and how to gain independence.

after learning those simple little beats and not knowing if he wanted to buy the next book, he decided to take a break and, instead of going back to professional books, he’d just listen to some of his favorite tracks... most of which were ginger baker... which made things kind of hard when he only had one bass drum, two tom-toms, and one floor tom. those, plus the really low quality pearl cymbals. still, he did his best to make it work.

just a side-note that, because of videos of ginger, isaac used (and still uses, out of habit) a mix of traditional and matched grip.

he went back and forth between the books and mimicking the patterns of other drummers (mostly ginger) up until he was around 16 and his friend, ribs (y’all), decided to teach him a few more technical skills. what you want to learn for this song are polyrhythms, but those are hard and no, ginger isn’t using a crash there, he’s using a splash and do you want a discount on some better cymbals and drumheads from my parents’s music shop because this is a very functional kit but it kind of sounds whack

he continued using the same whack kit, but replaced the heads with aquarians, as per ribs’s recommendation (but evans and remo are also good) and, after literally examining baker’s kit, replaced the cymbals with various zildjian collections

even though we stan istanbul agop in this house.

he also started listening to more drummers than... pretty much just baker with a hint of john bonham, keith moon, and ringo starr. as his friend suggested, he tried out drummers like buddy rich, art blakey, travis barker, dave grohl, karen carpenter, neil peart, nick mason, simon phillips –– even was told to listen to ac/dc songs just to see how a successful band could be made using essentially the same beat over and over and over.

so now he had some split time. school. work. practice. figure out who the hell was making dinner that night/if there was someone making dinner last night because they might both be talking each other up.

although he applied to various colleges, and although some of these colleges actually accepted him, he ultimately decided not to go. instead, he moved from san jose to los angeles in the hopes that he’d find something bigger than himself... and a new drum set...

he found the latter in a ludwig kit with two bass drums, two tom-toms, and two floor toms. then he just added a bunch of stuff and tried to make it like ginger baker’s. pretty much spent all of his money on it and then some.

when his friends formed a band and found success, he was very very happy for them... but... he found himself stuck... driving ubers.

and lyfts!

he’d seen the twilight zone before. he loved that show. he’d seen the episode ‘the hitch-hiker,’ so he was really driving for the companies against his better judgment. 

his worst uber story? the time a guy got into the car, had pinged a location that was still marked as a store on the uber gps but had recently been torn down, and tried to attack him when they got there :\ he 110% fought back, though. was fired because the other guy was the one who made it out injured.

only drove for lyft after that :\

he did take on a few projects, but he... proved to be too much of a roger waters for people who just wanted to chill and have fun. there would be adverts for people who wanted to form a band and he’d be like “hell yeah! finally! a band!” then he’d get pissed that they advertised it so seriously but really... just wanted to jam. did not have any plans to try to do anything with it.

the few projects he did join that involved people who wanted to actually achieve success... if they were slacking, you best bet his inner roger waters came out! which is why he never stuck around in any projects for too long!

but ‘projects’ and ‘jam sessions’ were totally different. you want to do ‘wipeout’ in a project? he’s gonna take that intro that literally everyone on the planet knows SERIOUSLY. you want to do ‘wipeout’ in a jam session? LET’S HAVE SOME FUN WITH IT.

he does some session/studio drumming for other artists to make some extra money while doing something he genuinely enjoys... but... still... it is no project™

in between things right now, he got a call from joakim that, while muffled and staticky, sounded like it said ‘get here, please’ and clearly stated where he was.

of course, voicemail lines were crossed and many many many essential words were left out – words that were basically saying the exact opposite ahfsdkjl. the shadow’s really playin them :\

so here he is, in all his glory.

TL;DR:

i was gonna kms if i didn’t play another drummer, so this is my ginger baker fanboy whose parents were literally just best friends and, as a result, were also both his friend. the internet raised him. started playing drums when he was 10 on a low qual kit with low qual cymbals that his parents got him for christmas, but literally why would you get a beginning a good set? continued playing. eventually moved to los angeles and tried to form many successful projects, but was too much of a roger waters. was summoned up here by the shadow man fucking around joakim. his greatest shame is how many ubers he has driven.

PERSONALITY INFO:

he will always say his proudest moment was when he learned how to play ‘toad’ by ginger baker cream all the way through.

big ginger baker fanboy.

loves the twilight zone and will just spill a random fact out about it every now and again.

a lowkey control freak which completely goes against the way he dresses and the vibe he gives off. 

is only a dick about it if you’re part of one of his ‘projects’ but aren’t taking it seriously tho :\

ok i’m too tired 2 write a personality section rn when im already rly bad at them but!! again!! feel free 2 j refer to the zodiac big three + the personality types!!

FEARS:

mannequins: they’re already creepy enough when you really think about it, then you add in that episode of the twilight zone where the characters wake up in an unfamiliar house and go outside and basically everyone is just a mannequin? ya he hates mannequins.

hitch-hikers: so, as we have just seen, he’s had it bad enough with people who were registered to an app, paying, their personal information readily available, etc., etc... so then what would happen if it was just a complete and utter stranger who didn’t have any personal information, any ping, and was the sole focus of a different twilight zone episode? he... is going... to drive past you. he’ll feel bad about it, but...

dying with nothing to show: here’s the money shot! here’s the deep fear! as has been shown throughout, isaac craves success and some form of a legacy. if he dies with nothing to show for his life, then was his life ever worth it in general?

WANTED CONNECTIONS:

ok,,, it might be bc im tired rn,,, but i have the most basic list that will hopefully be updated tomorrow bc it is SO VERY BASIC:

friends

fwb

ons

exes

enemies (much easier to get on his bad side than it is w/ fluke)

BRAINSTORMING AND/OR SOMETHING FROM YOUR WANTED CONNECTIONS AND/OR WHATEVER YOU HAVE AN IDEA FOR!!!!

[vrgamertc]

John Prine was an Army veteran walking a U.S. Postal Service beat in Chicago and writing songs on the side when Kris Kristofferson heard him and helped spread the word about Prine’s gifts. Pretty soon, he resigned as a letter carrier; his supervisor snickered, “You’ll be back.” Nearly 50 years later, this January, he was given a lifetime achievement Grammy for his contributions to songwriting. The singing mailman almost always had the last laugh.

Prine, who died on Tuesday from complications of the coronavirus, was legitimately unique. He took familiar blues themes — my baby left me — but filled them with whimsy and kindness. He liked a saucy lyric, and wrote movingly, in character, of the quiet lives and loneliness of humdrum people. He seemed like a Zen sage and offered an uncynical live-and-let-live morality in his songs, writing in a colloquial voice that revealed a love of the way Americans speak. He showed how much humor you could put in a song and still be taken seriously. He had less in common with any other songwriter than he did with Mark Twain.

He grew up in Maywood, a western suburb of Chicago, and was reared by working-class parents from Kentucky, where he often spent summers with relatives and fell in love with country music and bluegrass. By 13, he was performing in rural jamborees. When he debuted in 1971, in his mid-20s, he sounded like an old man already, so years later, when he got old and went through two cancer treatments, he still sounded like himself. From his first to his last, he wrote songs that were tender, hilarious, and wise, without grandstanding any of these traits. Here are 15 of the best.

‘Angel From Montgomery’ (1971)

“Angel From Montgomery,” his best-known song, begins with a little declarative startle: “I am an old woman, named after my mother.” It’s an incisive and terrifying look at the dissatisfactions of a bad marriage and a woman’s sense of being economically trapped in her misery. Bonnie Raitt recorded it three years later and uncovered some of the song’s dormant melodies.

‘Your Flag Decal Won’t Get You Into Heaven Anymore’ (1971)

Prine’s self-titled 1971 debut album is a playlist all its own; it has more great songs than a lot of respected songwriters have in their entire careers. The moral stance of this sprightly folk-rock ditty is a response to what he saw as sham patriotism during the Nixon years, and it remains relevant: “Jesus don’t like killing/No matter what the reason’s for.” Prine, a former altar boy, stopped playing it live for a number of years, but when George W. Bush became president, Prine said, “I thought I’d bring it back.”

‘Hello in There’ (1971)

Some fans and critics are put off by this song and its slightly lesser companion, “Sam Stone,” which they see as performative displays of sensitivity toward the vulnerable, or what we now call virtue signaling. Yet somehow, we don’t ever criticize singers for signaling vices and meanness. Prine sings in the voice of an old married man with a dead son, who spends his days in silence and loneliness, and who at the end of the song, asks people to be kind to the elderly.

‘The Frying Pan’ (1972)

For his second album, “Diamonds in the Rough,” Prine assembled a small, mostly acoustic band and pursued a front-porch, Appalachian simplicity. Like a lot of his songs, this one takes a lighthearted view of domestic complications: A man comes home and discovers his wife has run off with a traveling salesman. He cries miserably, recounts what he loved about her (“I miss the way she used to yell at me/The way she used to cuss and moan”), and full of pride, comes to the wrong conclusion: Never leave your wife at home.

‘Please Don’t Bury Me’ (1973)

For people who love Prine’s music, there’s some small solace in listening to his songs about death, which have the same sense of mischief and acceptance as the ones about broken marriages. (Try “Mexican Home” or “He Was in Heaven Before He Died.”) The narrator is dead, and as angels explain to him how it happened, they also recap his last wish: to not be dropped into a cold grave, but to be put to practical use, as an organ donor: “I’d druther have ’em cut me up/And pass me all around.” A kind of recycling anthem from his terrific third album, “Sweet Revenge.”

‘You Never Can Tell’ (1975)

Almost like an apology, Prine concludes “Sweet Revenge,” a grieving, downhearted album, with an exuberant Chuck Berry cover, one great writer nodding to another. The Memphis R&B guitarist Steve Cropper produced the record and put together a crack horn section, which pushes ahead of some barrelhouse piano. Prine wasn’t a rocker, but he could rock.

‘That’s the Way the World Goes Round’ (1978)

Prine seemed to have an unlimited ability to expand and vary songwriting structures and perspectives. This track, which has been covered by Miranda Lambert and Norah Jones, has two verses: In the first, the narrator describes a drunk who “beats his old lady with a rubber hose,” and in the second, the narrator gets stuck in a frozen bathtub (it’s hard to explain) and imagines the worst until a sudden sun thaws him out. Both verses illustrate the refrain: that’s the way the world goes round. Even when circumstances are bad in Prine songs, he favors optimism and acceptance.

‘Iron Ore Betty’ (1978)

A lot of Prine songs celebrate physical pleasure: food, dancing and sex, which he gallantly prefers to call “making love.” The working-class singer in this soulful, up-tempo shuffle feels unreserved delight at having a girlfriend (“We receive our mail in the same mailbox/And we watch the same TV”), and wants us to know he and Betty aren’t just friends (“I got rug burns on my elbows/She’s got ’em on her knees”). OK guy, we get it.

‘Just Wanna Be With You’ (1980)

A stomping number from “Storm Windows” in the style of Chuck Berry, with the Rolling Stones sideman Wayne Perkins on guitar. Prine’s lyrics don’t distinguish between reality and absurdity — they don’t clash, they mix — and here’s one more way to say you’re happy and in love: “I don’t even care what kind of gum I chew.” And another: “Lonely won’t be lonesome when we get through.”

‘Let’s Talk Dirty in Hawaiian’ (1986)

Prine had a sideline in novelty songs, which give full voice to his comic absurdity, throwaways that are worth saving, including the 1973 semi-hit “Dear Abby,” and this now-problematic number from “German Afternoons” inspired by a paperback book called “Instant Hawaiian.” Prine and his co-writer Fred Koller began making up Hawaiian-sounding nonsense words full of sexual innuendo, and Lloyd Green added airport-Tiki-bar bar steel guitar for maximum faux authenticity. You can say Prine’s loving disposition makes the song OK, and you can also say it doesn’t.

‘All the Best’ (1991)

After five years away, Prine returned with “The Missing Years,” a Grammy-winning album produced by Howie Epstein, Tom Petty’s bass player. The singer in this gentle, masterly miniature claims to want good things for an ex-lover, but feelings aren’t simple: “I wish you don’t do like I do/And never fall in love with someone like you” twists the knife. Now recording for his own label, Oh Boy Records, Prine was about to hit a hot streak.

‘Lake Marie’ (1995)

Bob Dylan, who was a huge fan, called the haunted, mysterious “Lake Marie” his favorite Prine song, and who are we to disagree with Dylan on the topic of songwriting? Even though Epstein’s booming production draws too much attention to itself, “Lost Dogs + Mixed Blessings” is full of winners: the simple, loving ballad “Day is Done,” the rapid-fire doggerel of “We Are the Lonely” and the calm, ornery “Quit Hollerin’ at Me,” where Prine tells his wife that the neighbors “already think my name is ‘Where in the hell you been?’”

‘In Spite of Ourselves’ (1999)

Prine was diagnosed with cancer, and doctors removed a tumor from the right side of his neck, which took away his already-modest ability to project his voice. But incredibly, his stolid singing was now perfect for harmonies, and he cut a duets album called “In Spite of Ourselves” with female country and Americana singers. On its one original song, Prine and Iris DeMent trade backhanded compliments (“She thinks all my jokes are corny/Convict movies make her horny”) that read like a divorce complaint, but turn out to be only pillow talk.

‘Some Humans Ain’t Human’ (2005)

At seven minutes and three seconds, this track from “Fair and Square” is the longest song on any of his studio albums. A cloud of slide guitar keeps this soft waltz afloat and allows Prine to express his disapproval of, if not contempt for, so-called humans who lack empathy for others. There’s a couplet that is clearly about George W. Bush, and Prine noticed that some audience members were surprised by it. “I never tried to rub it in anybody’s face, but I thought it was pretty clear that I wasn’t a closet Republican,” he told the Houston Press.

‘When I Get to Heaven’ (2018)

In 2013, doctors removed the cancerous part of Prine’s left lung, which sidelined and weakened him. It’s hard now to listen to his final album, “The Tree of Forgiveness,” which was nominated for three Grammys, and not think that Prine heard the clock ticking louder. There’s so much tenderness in “Knockin’ on Your Screen Door,” about a man whose family left him with only an 8-track tape of George Jones, and in the elegiac, reassuring parental entreaty “Summer’s End.” In the last song, “When I Get to Heaven,” Prine describes his ideal afterlife: a rock band, a cushy hotel, a girl, a cocktail (“vodka and ginger ale”) and “a cigarette that’s nine miles long.” He removes his watch, and asks, “What are you gonna do with time after you’ve bought the farm?”

[tingleparker]

When in Hawaii

Tom Holland x Fem!Reader

Request: No one asked for this but Tom’s Instagram Hawaii pics are just too tempting.

•Warnings: Fluff, bad writing (definitely not my best), swearing?.

•Summary: When in Hawaii, You got to do something new. Sport? Not always your forte but you didn’t realize you are so awful at golf until you meet a handsome, trust fund golfer.

•Word count- 2.7k (how did I manage to write so much scrap)

When in Hawaii you got to try something new. In this beautiful place like this, you need to just get away from reality; take the world in for once in your life. Your family had planned this holiday for weeks now, and finally, all of you are here. Just like the pictures you see on Instagram feeds, the island is as beautiful as it is captured on our phone screens. While dragging all our luggage to the hotel, other families and groups of friends pass you by; but a certain group catches your eye. You don't remember them on the same plane but you do remember seeing a fancy jet at the airport surely that wasn't theirs right? You shrug it off, you didn't even know them anyways; so who are you to judge. You caught the eyes of the prettiest of hazel, the sun’s light shining down on the colour bringing out a little shine to it. Your lips twitch into a smile, as you see the rest of the handsome man that has now caught your attention. His eyebrow quirks up before returning the smile towards you and turning around to his family, catching up with them. You do the same, having to lightly jog to return to the group. A smile remained on your face throughout the rest of the day; which wasn't long as straight after dinner, you pass out on the hotel bed; exhausted by jet-lag and the journey here.

It is like waking up in paradise; the sunshine, the view, the atmosphere. Though you never liked waking up, you got up seeing a text from your younger siblings about the family already at breakfast. You sigh, you seriously thought you were early for once but anyways you begrudgingly cleaned yourself up before exiting your room and heading down for breakfast.

“So we were wondering if we could go?” You hear your younger brother Liam ask, as you get closer to your family.

“Go where?” You ask whilst pulling out a chair joining them, grabbing a plate instantly and getting what you wanted to eat.

“Golfing!” Your youngest sibling Malia, exclaims.

“You have permission to go but Y/n has to go with you two.” Your mother stated causing the pair of teenagers to groan.

“Out of everything you guys choose golf?” You ask after swallowing your mouthful, curious about why they chose what seems to be a boring sport in your opinion.

“You don't even play sport, maybe you should start. Golfs easy enough for you...I think” Liam sasses, causing you to shoot him a glare; your dad sternly calling out his name.

“Maybe I shouldn't go, which means you can't either.” you clap back, poking your tongue out at your brother as he huffs; crossing his arms angrily.

“Please Y/n… I really wanna go play and you gotta step out of your comfort zone. Try something new!” Malia convinces, grasping at your arm and putting on the best puppy eyes she can.

You sigh, you couldn't resist her damn eyes. The younger pair let out a big cheer, high-fiving each other knowing they had won.  

“Alright, you two little shits-”

“Language.” Your mum scolded, as you give a little sorry for an apology.

“As I was saying, my two dear siblings; you better be ready before twelve or else I'm leaving your asses.”

“Y/n!” You dad now piping up as you once again apologize but stood up from your chair, ready to head back into your room to have some alone time before having to go out.

“Oh! Before you go, just remember we’re all having lunch at the small restaurant near the golfing range at two-thirty” Your dad informs, you nod putting the information in the back of your head before heading up to your room.

~

After getting ready for golf, you head out of your room at exactly twelve and you turn the corner to see both Liam and Malia standing at the elevator all dressed and ready to go. You roll your eyes at their antics, all of you hopping into the; heading out to the golf course.

The three of you arrive, renting out some clubs and golf balls before heading out to the holes. You’ll admit that when you see others playing golf, it never piqued your interest; actually, you think you've never actually played before after recalling some past memories.  Your two younger siblings are smiling ear to ear as we get to hole number one, Malia setting up her shot first. You look around noticing a group of boys on the next hole, you decide staring is rude so you look around the scenery; getting into your own bubble.

“Y/n! Your turn.” Malia shouts, snapping you out of it and gripping the golf club that Liam hands to you.

“If you don't remember, Golf is where you hit the ball into that hole over there. Easy.” Liam instructs but obviously being sarcastic as always.

“Yeah, I got it. Should be easy right?” You say mostly to yourself, you don't even know why you were stressing; it is literally just golf.

“It’s easy, you got this Y/n!” Malia encourages with a bright smile.

You line up your shot, making sure that you'll hit the ball at the right angle to get it somewhat near the hole. Taking a deep breath you swung the club back before swinging it back forward hitting the ball. What you didn't realize was maybe you got your angles wrong, as the ball flew through the air landing right on the head of one of the boys ahead of you. You gasp loudly as Liam and Malia burst into laughter, you instantly start moving to the boy you hit; him now on the ground clutching his head as you see another person probably calling for staff. As you arrive at the group you realize it's the same family from the airport. Your mind could only focus on the fact that you have just hit the most the most attractive man you've ever seen, and you're not even exaggerating.

“I am so sorry!” You apologize, making all their heads turn towards you, but you only look at the injured man as he stood up right in front of you.

“Don't come near me ever again! My dad can sue you for this, not like we need any more money from people like you.” He basically hisses out, fire in his eyes; and if looks could kill, you’d definitely be six feet under in a second.

“People like me? You mean people who aren't spoiled brats?” You fire back, the words just coming out without a thought; not caring about the consequences.

“You want to say that again? Y-”

“Woah, woah, woah. Alright, let's not get violent now. How about we get you to the first aid bay inside Tom.” One of the other men steps in the middle before reaching out to help the injured ‘Tom?’.

“Don't touch me! I can walk myself, it's not like she hit me in the leg.” Tom pushes the blue-eyed boy away but the other two boys swooped in helping him walk.

“But she did hit you in the head, so you could have a concussion dumb-ass.” The curly, red-haired one spoke up as they aid him to walk towards the building.

Your phone pings with a notification from your siblings, saying that they'll continue through all the holes and meet up with you after. You quickly respond to them, hoping they won't misbehave, and you knew you would meet up with them soon. You look up again to see their figures getting smaller in the distance, without realizing the one who stepped in is still next to you.

“I’m sorry ‘bout him. He’s -” He begins to speak but you cut him off.

“Spoiled?”

“Yeah, but I bet he doesn't mean whatever dumb shit comes out of his mouth.” He defends after laughing at your response.

“Yeah, I bet” You sarcastically say, rolling your eyes.

“Seriously, C’mon we’ll go see him in the bay” Blue eyes says before starting to walk in the direction of the building.

“Are you kidding? Like he… I would want to see him again!” You say, a tad loudly for the man to hear; causing him to stop and turn around to face you.

“Well, I think you and him deserve some apologizes,” He says before turning around again, continuing on his journey.

You close your eyes, asking yourself; were you really going to face him again? You called this guy hot in your mind before hitting him with a golf ball and then going off at each other. You sigh, opening your eyes; seeing the man was quite far now before running to catch up to him.

“Glad you could join…”

“Y/n”

“Harrison, that div’s best friend.”

~

As you got to the first aid room, you see the two other boys who helped out heading out of the room.

“We gotta check up on dad, catch up later Haz.” One of them says before the two walk away, obviously to their father.

You are starting to second guess things, he obviously wouldn't want to see you after what you did; so why were you here? Harrison then goes to open the door but before he could push it open, your hand shot out to stop him.

“A-are you sure I should be here?” You ask feeling doubt and like you shouldn't actually go in.

“Seriously Y/n? We’re both going in. Don’t worry about him.” Harrison reassures before opening the door fully this time.

You were behind Harrison, Tom not being able to see you yet as Harrison greets the injured man. Tom is sat on the bed in the bay, the aid had gone off somewhere; so it was just him in the room.

“Oh thank lord you're here Haz. Did you tell that girl to get lost? Seriously as pretty as she was, she hit me in the head.” You hear the trust fund kids voice, wanting to run away and crawl into a hole but at the same time confront him.

He called you pretty but at the same time can't let go of his dick of a personality for one second.

“Not exactly…” Harrison draws out before stepping to the side, showing your figure behind him.

Tom sends a glare to Haz before turning to you, looking you up and down in judgment. You want to cower away from his sight but you needed to stand your ground, you couldn't let this rich, trust fund and handsome man beat you.

“Sorry?” you apologize but it came out more like a question, earning a nudge from Harrison who shot you a glare as well as Tom.

“Seriously? That's all?” Tom questions.

“Well, what do you want me to say? I’ve already apologized so what do you expect?” You ask, words just flowing out from your mind.

“Alright, I’m sorry. For being a div, how ‘bout we talk? You can sit if you'd like” Tom surprisingly nicely suggests.

You give him a weird glance but wouldn't refuse his suggestion, so you went to sit next to him on the bed; space between you two is still substantial.

It started off with awkward small talk before it just clicked. The two of you actually had common interests, sharing jokes that brought tears to your eyes. The two of you were in your own world and didn't realize Haz had walked out the room minutes ago. Harrison walking out the room proud to be the best wing-man for his best mate and wanting a ‘thank you’ from him later

“You know you're actually pretty funny for someone who hit me on the head.” Tom jokes.

“C’mon that was a low blow. Does it still hurt?” You ask, unconsciously moving closer to inspect the bump on his head.

“A bit, it's not bad though,” Tom says as your fingers reach out to slowly graze the injury you had caused.

You hadn't realized how close your faces were until your eyes flicker down to see that there was barely centimeters between the two of you. You feel Toms' hand fall to your hip as your hands slid down to cup his face. The two of you leaning a tad closer, lips brushing against each other. Just as you were about to close the gap, your phone notifications blare through the room causing the two of you to jump apart. You quickly grab out your phone, to see Liam spamming you with messages.

‘Where are you?’

‘We gotta meet for lunch remember?’

‘Or are you too busy getting a restraining order from that dude you hit?’

Your eyes widen as you forgot about the family lunch you had at two-thirty, looking at the time it so happened to be two-twenty.

“Shit!” You say out loud to yourself as you shoot to stand up from your spot.

“What's wrong?” Tom asks, looking at your frantic state.

“I forgot I had something and I really need to go if I don't want to be late.” You inform him, almost taking off.

“How about I give you my number? We could meet up sometime again?” Tom asks almost calmly but on the inside, he was freaking the fuck out; hoping to see you again.

“Yeah, sure” You respond; giving him your phone, obviously you wouldn't turn him down.

After Tom gives your phone back you quickly thank him and without thinking lean in for a kiss on his cheek, before basically darting out of the room with an ‘I’ll text you later!’.

Tom's lips tug into a smile, thinking about how this situation has turned before plopping his head on the weirdly comfortable pillow of the bed.

~

After rushing out of the room, you run to the reception desk; wanting to ask to place an announcement for your siblings but you see them standing at the side leaning against the desk. You let out a breath of relief, walking over to them and ushering them out; not wanting to be late for the family lunch, know mum would kill you.

“So how’d it go with the guy you hit?” Liam teases, obviously not knowing that you had made up.

“Actually good, thank you very much.” You respond as the three of you sped walk to the nearby restaurant.

“Ooo Y/n has a crush on the guy she hit in the head.” Malia joins in with the teasing, a skip in her step now.

“Y/n must've given him a concussion if he has any interest in her.” Liam snarks like he always does, earning a hit on the back of the head by you.

“Shut up and walk faster.”

~

The three of you make it in just in time, you spot your parents already sat at a table and you join them. Just as you were browsing the menu, you hear a loud chatter of people. Glancing up you see the Hollands and Haz, your eyes instantly finding Tom. With the feeling of someone watching him, Tom turns to see Y/n looking straight at him. With a wink of his eye, making a blush crawl up your cheeks the two of you turn away. The waiter comes, making you stutter out an order; making your family look at you weirdly. Your phone lights up with a message from a contact under “Div you hit in the head’

‘Fancy seeing you here love.’ The message read, you smile at it before looking up to see Tom sat at a table near yours; eyes already on you.

“So how was golfing?” Your dad asks, making the younger pair basically jump in their seats.

“It was so fun! I loved it” Malia exclaims in excitement, recalling the events of today in her mind.

“Yeah! It was fun seeing Y/n hit her crush in the head.” Liam exposes as you kick him under the table for the comment.

You didn't say anything back, but you glance up to see the prettiest of eyes and a purple bruise that you caused. Whoops. But you wouldn't change anything that happened today because...

When in Hawaii you gotta try something new and maybe you'll hit something you like.

[newmusicmonthly]

2019

Hello,

Missed me?

No longer a monthly mailer – just another end of year round up.

On reflection, perhaps I’ve played it a bit safe this year, but I didn’t feel there was as much great music out there as in previous years.

Yes, I too use Google, so I have listened to all the end of year Best Of lists online, and so those artists not included just didn’t resonate with me this year.

I maintain ‘bad guy’ off Billie Eilish’s record sounds like a Super Mario bonus level (probably in a spooky dungeon)… which I suppose isn’t a bad thing. And I love Lana, but I just didn’t think the latest record was all that. And the same was true of Angel Olsen, Nick Cave, Kanye, Hot Chip… but don’t get me started on Bon Iver: avant-garde “Kum ba yah” at best (sorry Rob).

But then that’s part of the joy of music, variety and differing opinions… so please share yours! What have I overlooked? What should be revisited? Where in the depths of streaming services is that killer track from 2019?

For now, here is my list of songs, somewhat crowbarred into the monthly format (as mentioned, this email was once called New Music Monthly Mailer with five tracks a month, and surely we need some level of constancy and accountability this year).

Enjoy, or not – but please do share your own choice picks.

Merry Christmas.

R x  

NEW MUSIC 2019

JANUARY

Sharon Van Etten - Seventeen Just go and watch her performance from Glastonbury: https://youtu.be/BM6jn891seU Seriously, from 2:45, just fucking brilliant.

J.S. Ondara - Saying Goodbye Lovely acoustic number and a great voice that evokes Tracy Chapman. 

Basekou Kouyate, Ngoni ba - Kanto kelena (feat. Habib Koite) Malian ngoni master returns to acoustic roots.

Delicate Steve - Selfie of a Man Synthy silly catchy instrumental pop-rock.

Steve Gunn - Vagabond Guitar troubadour telling stories of solitude with unostentatious guitar tones.

FEBRUARY

Mara Balls - Ikävä ikävää Driving Finnish Doom-lite.

Julie Jacklin - Body A narrative masterclass, sombre and brooding, but also simmering and pulsating.

Strand of Oaks - Weird Ways Big widescreen rock, which builds into a gorgeous swirl of sound, with Timothy on fine yet reflective form, backed by the band of My Morning Jacket.

Crows - Hang Me High Long awaited debut from Idles approved band, loud fuzz Mary Chain / Dom Keller vibes.

Kel Assouf - Fransa Desert blues, with all the best Tuareg styling, but added beefy production.

MARCH

Nick Waterhouse - Man Leaves Town Mr Waterhouse and band well in the pocket.

Dave - Streatham Heavy beats and piano lines soundtrack story of growing up in SW16. 

Karen O, Danger Mouse - Turn The Light Danger Mouse brings the gentle disco grooves underneath Karen’s swooning vocals.

Small Feet - The Lake Down tempo reverb and echoes float throughout this woozy directionless jam. 

The Brian Jonestown Massacre - Tombes Oubliées BJM do what BJM do best... in French. 

APRIL

The Comet Is Coming - Summon The Fire How can you not move to this?!

W.H. Lung - Empty Room Great new band (c.f. mailer 2017!), and as I already included ‘Inspiration!’ this is my second favourite cut from a top album.

Josefin Öhrn + The Liberation - Feel The Sun Another great artist (championed back in 2016 I think you’ll find), spectral psych grooves.

Weyes Blood - Mirror Forever Great opening line, there’s a coldness but also strangely comforting.

Foxygen - News Now a lot people had fallen off the Foxygen wagon recently, including me, but this is catchy melody filled vibes, with a completely unexpected stonking T-Rex style groove that kicks in around the 3:30 minute mark

MAY

Lizzo – Juice Speaking of good vibes… I mean, again, just go watch the Glastonbury set: https://youtu.be/R9CTs1NsZRI.

Tyler, The Creator - EARFQUAKE Production values: A*, chances of not leaving… C-

The 100 Knights Orchestra - Soul Fugue Celebrating Daptone Records 100th RPM single, this special features every horn player the label has ever worked with, and it is glorious.

Death and Vanilla - A Flaw In The Iris Devendra Banhart vibes to begin, fazing in Mazzy Star style reverb and guitars.

Desert Sands - Are You There The best psychedelic space rock released… ever! 

JUNE

Rose City Band - Fog of Love Warm tones and laid back ambles, which has producer Ripley Johnson’s stamp all over it.

Madonnatron - Goodnight Little Empire Disco ditty extraordinaire.

The Black Keys - Lo/Hi Have you heard of ZZ Top? You have?

The Amazons - Doubt It Future rock heroes get dark.

Fat White Family, Parrot and Cocker Too - Feet - Parrot and Cocker Too Remix Gone for the remix version of this great track: what isn’t improved by added shakers and throbbing techno?

JULY

Michael Kiwanuka, Tom Misch - Money (with Tom Misch) The first of two Kiwanuka tracks in this list, but this was a standalone single, and has all the bubbly bass groove it was impossible not to include.

Drake, Rick Ross - Money In The Grave (Drake ft. Rock Ross) Speaking of money… bounce!

DOPE LEMON - Salt & Pepper Weird keys give way to J.J. Cale style guitar noodles, whilst Angus heaps on the druggy references adding to the meandering stoned atmosphere.

The Quiet Temple, Moon Duo - The Last Opium Den On Earth (Moon Duo Remix) Speaking of druggy… 12 minutes of acid psych jazz in the last opium den on earth.

Nev Cottee - Hello Stranger Cinematic and pastoral, but also searing

AUGUST

Palace - Running Wild Top class indie pop nugget with great simple guitar solo to end.

Kandodo 3 - Everything Green's Gone This definitely isn’t for everyone: think Nine Inch Nails soundtracks at their most impenetrable, if you can make it two thirds of the way through this 13 minute wig out, there are some great slide guitars.

Clairo – Bags Breakout bedroom pop with one of the hookiest melodies all year.

Mini Mansions - Works Every Time Behind the beat smooth grooves.

Death Hawks - Whisper Squelchy over produced 80s style pop bananas,

SEPTEMBER

Native Harrow - Can't Go On Like This Inevitable Laurel Canyon / Joni Mitchell comparisons on this retro analogue sound ballad.

Ty Segall - The Arms Ty does a rare acoustic number, and even throws in a rather tasteful mandolin line.

Pixx - Funsize Synth bleeps and beats disguise a Radiohead-esque creeping guitar line.

Sleater-Kinney - The Future Is Here Love the motorik dirge vibes here, underpin lovely vocal lines and melodies which remind us: the future is here, and we can’t go back.

Marika Hackman - i'm not where you are Great pop hooks and guitar lines.

OCTOBER

Dylan LeBlanc - Renegade I’m a big fan of LeBlanc and his retro stylings, and this track is super lilting 80s driving rock.

TOOL - Pneuma I struggled to get TOOL for a while, but this record and this track in particular is fucking phenomenal.

Lightning Dust - Devoted To Amber Webber and Joshua Wells’ solo project (previously of Black Mountain), conjure spectral dreamscapes.

Sturgill Simpson - Remember To Breathe Sturgill goes electronic rawk – and Tomoyasu Hotei wants his production back.

Michael Kiwanuka - Hero Here he is again, with the standout track from a truly brilliant album.

NOVEMBER

Kelsey Waldon - White Noise, White Lines Kentucky country groove rock.

WIVES - Waving Past Nirvana Churning fuzz rock underpins laconic loose vocals, cool.

Pumarosa - I See You Tense synth verses give way to soaring superb choruses.

Jaako Eine Kalevi - Dissolution Finnish synth pop architect doing a very good Matthew Dear impersonation. 

Warmduscher - Midnight Dipper “The offspring of a match made in hell between Fat White Family and Paranoid London” – full-on sleazy glam.

DECEMBER

Pond - Don't Look at the Sun (Or You'll Go Blind) – Live My favourite track the band perform live, now finally available on streaming.

Staff Benda Bilili - Jamais de la vie The famous Congolese street band return with tight uplifting grooves.

Khruangbin, Leon Bridges - Texas Sun Sit back, open a cold one, and enjoy (when summer comes back around).

Jimmy "Duck" Holmes - Catfish Blues Mississippi delta blues from the 72 year old Holmes, produced by Dan Auerbach.

Mikal Cronin - Show Me Long-time Ty Segall collaborator serves up some Tom Petty-esque soft rock.

[bramblemask973]

Power of the Clans - Prologue

Fire... Fire..! Fire! FIRE! Kin and kin will drown the forest in blood. Lives will be lost to the claws of battle. Fire alone will save the Clan when kin is no more. Fire alone will save the Clan when kin is no more! A Warrior Cats AU where the Clans have powers and the Fire Alone prophecy means a little more than it lets on.

AO3 link FF.Net link

Proofreading? What's that?

Welcome to Power of the Clans! A WIP self indulgent Warriors AU where each Clan has its own power and the Fire Alone prophecy has a different meaning. SkyClan has wings, ShadowClan uses shadows as portals, ThunderClan controls lightning, WindClan controls air and RiverClan controls water.

If you notice any typos or hard to read sentences, please let me know! ~Jeli

The sun was nearing the end of its reign in the sky when they finally reached the outskirts of the forest. A light breeze shuffled the leaves in the canopy above, and the distant sound of birdsong made the air seem that much lighter.  The first steps onto the sun-warmed grass brought a new energy to her aching muscles. Home, again. Finally. It had felt like such a long journey, and though they’d only been gone overnight, it felt like days.

The newly appointed Spottedstar padded onto the rocks at the top of the gorge, bounding down from them onto the path below. Shaking out her tortoiseshell fur and taking a quick moment to note the cats at the riverside, she looked back up over her shoulder to make sure her companion followed. Duskfeather had travelled with her overnight, and hadn’t left her side for a single moment. He was the best cat she could have taken with her on the journey to the Moonstone. The tom leaped down onto the rock beside her just as a greeting came from above, drawing Spottedstar’s attention.

“Spottedmask! Duskfeather! You’re back!”

Daypaw rushed to the edge of the gorge, nearly taking herself off of it as she flared her wings to stop. Crouching on the lip of the rock, her tail puffed up, flicking with excitement. The cream tabby grinned as she looked down at them, amber eyes wide.

“Or are you Spottedstar now?”

“That’s right.” Spottedstar purred, tucking her wings close to her sides to give Duskfeather room to stand beside her. Duskfeather’s green eyes gleamed warmly as he raised his tail in greeting to his apprentice. Daypaw’s grin only widened and a mischievous look crossed over her face for a moment as she opened her wings and straightened up.

“Awesome.”

Almost immediately, Daypaw leaped past them onto the Rockpile and then down to the riverside, nearly flattening Dustface in the process. Spottedstar shared an amused look with Duskfeather before she turned and headed down the path deeper into the camp. Many moons of paws had travelled this path, wearing it down into the rock to make a safe passage for cats of all ages from the pit of the gorge to the top. She’d walked it many times from her kithood to last night, but now it felt different. New.

She didn’t have much time to think about it. Daypaw’s yowling had gained the attention of the rest of the Clan, and faces were peeking out of dens and appearing from behind the gorge rocks. A ginger tabby queen, Redleaf, peered out from the nursery, the sounds of barely born kits crying behind her. Her brother Cardinalfur sat beside the fresh kill pile at the bottom of the gorge, his tabby markings mirroring hers despite his darker fur, wings folded neatly over his back. His feathers weren’t quite as neat – the hint of green spattered here and there from the herbs he stashed in between them made his feathers appear ruffled and unkempt, despite being the cleanest in the Clan.

Feeling pride burn in her chest, Spottedstar glanced around, taking in the rest of the Clan. Shadefur had just landed, a fresh mouse clamped in her jaws. Behind her was Fangwisp, the newest warrior, licking his lips to clear the drops of river water from his mouth. Speckleheart appeared around the corner, three mice hanging by their tails from her teeth, her silver pelt dusty and ruffled. As Spottedstar reached the Rockpile and leaped up onto it, Dustface had Daypaw pinned, the apprentice squirming her protest.

SkyClan. Her Clan.

Heart beating in her chest like a woodpecker on bark, Spottedstar flared her wings as she stood tall, pulling breath in for a yowl.

“Let all cats old enough to catch their own prey join here beneath the Rockpile for a Clan meeting!”

A shiver went through her spine to the tip of her tail, and for once she was glad for her long fur to hide the fact that it was beginning to prick up along her back. She had dreamt for moons about being able speak those words, and it sent chills through her body to finally do so. She really was leader, and there was no turning back.

Her call had drawn out the remaining cats from their dens. Dustface finally moved off of Daypaw and nudged her to get up and sit properly. Cardinalfur jumped up onto one of the lower rocks of the Rockpile. Shadefur sat down between Duskfeather and Fangwisp. Redleaf took a glance back inside the nursery before she sat in its entrance, not willing to leave the kits. That was fine. Spottedstar didn’t expect her to, not after only giving birth last night. She was glad to see the queen was strong and safe, and the kits sounded the same.

Forcing her nervousness down, Spottedstar let her tail flick as she took in the faces of the Clan. Her Clan. They all trusted her, looked up to her to guide them, to keep them safe. Was she ready for this? Probably not. But she wasn’t alone. She had all of them.

“Cats of SkyClan,” Spottedstar began, pausing for a moment to swallow the rising dread in her throat. “As the Sun begins her descent and the Moon rises, we mourn Hawkstar as he travels with them on his way to StarClan. He was a fierce and devoted leader, and we will honor him in the stories we tell to our kits, and generations on. Hawkstar!”

The cats immediately raised their muzzles to the sky, calling out the old leader’s name to the sunset. A bittersweet pain started in her belly as she watched them. Hawkstar had passed the day before from an old infection that never healed properly, fighting for every breath. He had lived a good long life, though, and was an old cat when he died. Spottedstar lifted her eyes to the sky, letting the Clan chant his name until they faded back into silence of their own accord.

“StarClan has granted me their blessing and my nine lives so that I may continue in Hawkstar’s place as leader of SkyClan.” Wings tucked close to her sides, Spottedstar turned her gaze back onto the cats below. “I offer you all nine of them as I ask for your loyalty and your trust. I pray that StarClan can guide my paws to bring us to greater heights, so that SkyClan may thrive long after I have given all of my lives to its service.”

It was then that the Clan erupted into their own cheering, this time of her new name. Spottedstar’s worries suddenly vanished like the wind, warmth spreading over her fur again. They accepted her. She wasn’t sure what she would have done if they hadn’t. A few moments and then she stretched a wing for silence, finally able to do what she’d wanted since arriving back at home.

“But I cannot do it alone,” Spottedstar purred, pulling herself to her full height and looking up at the sky. “I, Spottedstar, leader of SkyClan, say these words below StarClan and Hawkstar, so that they may hear and approve of my choice. Duskfeather will be the new deputy of SkyClan.”

The Clan burst into cheers and purrs, Daypaw nearly leaping out of her skin as she howled her mentor’s name. Duskfeather just looked stunned, his eyes wide and fur rising along his spine. He stumbled as Shadefur gave him a shove with her head that nearly pushed him off of his feet, but quickly recovered, padding towards the Rockpile and climbing up beside Cardinalfur. The medicine cat grinned and touched his tail to his friend’s.

Finally the meeting was over. Spottedstar leaped down from the Rockpile, blinking as the Clan swarmed around her, offering kind words and purrs. It took a bit for them to disperse, but she made her way over to her new deputy and the medicine cat beside him. Cardinalfur stood up and grinned, giving her a friendly lick between the ears before stepping back.

“Congratulations! I knew you’d do great. I hope it wasn’t too disrespectful that I couldn’t go.”

“Dawnstep didn’t mind. She knew you had to worry about Redleaf,” Spottedstar smiled. “I’m glad the kitting went well. Redleaf seems alright.”

“After the first scare, it didn’t go too badly. She’s still nervous, though. It’s her first litter, so I told the Clan to leave her be for a few days. That goes for you as well, leader or not.”

“I’ll leave her be. I can speak with her later.” Spottedstar sat down beside them, suddenly exhausted. Now that the exhilaration of the day was over, the length of the journey caught up with her. Duskfeather shifted a bit closer, nudging her shoulder.

“If you’re going to the Gathering, you should get some rest. You haven’t slept since the Moonstone.”

“I’ll rest, its fine. I’m going to lose a life from being tired.” Spottedstar stood up and turned towards her den, but then glanced back up to Cardinalfur as Duskfeather nodded and walked away. He seemed lost in thought, eyes staring into the nursery. Following his gaze, Spottedstar froze. A soft glow was coming from inside the nursery, flickering like firelight. She blinked, and the glow was gone. Just the stone wall from before. Fur prickling along her spine, Spottedstar stood up again and shook her head. Maybe she was more tired than she thought.

“Get some sleep, Spottedstar. I feel like we have a long night ahead of us.” Cardinalfur whispered, giving her a strange glance before he turned away and headed for his den. Spottedstar watched him go, her tail flicking. Her first day as leader wasn’t even over yet, and he was already giving her strange cryptic messages.

Perhaps they both just needed to sleep.

***

The Gathering was going well. Brackenstar of ThunderClan and Sharpstar of ShadowClan had both welcomed her graciously, while Creekstar, RiverClan’s leader, offered some kind words in Hawkstar’s passing. Dewstar hadn’t come up to the Great Rock yet, but she was on her way. The view from here was brilliant. Spottedstar couldn’t help but flutter her wings to get some of the tension out of them. She could see every cat from here, which means every cat could see her.

Duskfeather seemed to be settling well with the other deputies. Sootcloud, ShadowClan’s deputy, was sitting beside him. By the looks of it, they were swapping stories, and looking quite comfortable. Cardinalfur was picking herbs from his feathers to give to the WindClan medicine cat, a ginger tabby named Ivyclaw, who had brought some of his own to trade. Everything seemed peaceful. Quiet.

This is how it should be. Peace among us for moons. How long could it last?

Spottedstar shifted over to let Dewstar leap up beside them, and a quick nod to Sharpstar let him know the Gathering could start. The ShadowClan leader let out a yowl for silence, waited a moment for the Clans to settle down, before he began to share his news.

Everything was going quietly for a while and it was Spottedstar’s turn to speak all too quickly. She gulped as Brackenstar shifted out of the way for her to step up, and as she did, a sudden harsh wind cut through the calm air of Four Trees. Stumbling, Spottedstar steadied herself and glanced down to the cats below, before her spine prickled and every muscle in her body stiffened. Every cat in the clearing went silent as the other leaders and medicine cats did the same. Nobody dared speak to break the silence, the wind picking up and clouds beginning to billow overhead.

Suddenly it wasn’t wind anymore. Voices, a dozen ghostly voices blew around the Clans, in every cat’s ears. From the smallest apprentice to the oldest elder to all of the leaders, every single cat’s fur prickled as the word of StarClan burst into their ears.

Fire…

Was StarClan taking back their blessing? Surely they wouldn’t do so now, in front of all of the Clans. Spottedstar looked frantically down to the cats, eyes widening as she caught sight of the glow again. The same glow from the nursery, the same firelight, except this time it was coming from the belly of a RiverClan queen.

Fire…!

The orange markings of a ShadowClan tortoiseshell warrior flickered.

Fire!

A WindClan apprentice’s eyes burst into flame.

FIRE!

A ThunderClan warrior’s tail swished anxiously, a blaze following in its trail.

And StarClan screamed.

Kin and kin and kin will drown the forest in blood. Lives will be lost to the claws of battle. Fire alone will save the Clan when kin is no more.

Fire alone will save the Clan when kin is no more!

[maddie-grove]

The Top Twenty Books I Read in 2018

My main takeaways from the past year’s reading:

Growing up is hard, whether you’re a working-class college sophomore trying to adjust to an Ivy League college, a chronically ill medieval kid trying to beat witchcraft charges, or A GHOST THE WHOLE TIME.

You can go to Kansas City or the Congo or SPACE, but you can never escape the past. 

Maybe I should be more worried about getting murdered?

Anyway:

20. East by Edith Pattou (2003)

Rose, a sixteenth-century Norwegian farm girl, loves her large family, but sometimes feels at odds with their rather staid personalities. So, when a talking polar bear offers to end her family’s poverty and her sister’s illness if she’ll stay with him for a year, she accepts not only out of desperation, but also wanderlust. This expansive retelling of “East of the Sun, West of the Moon” (already a winner because of its determined, flawed heroine) shines because of its vivid use of multiple settings and its well-developed minor characters. I initially thought it was a little slow, but I really came to appreciate Pattou’s skill over time.

19. Joe College by Tom Perrotta (2000)

Danny, a working-class Yale sophomore in 1982, thinks he has a lot to worry about. His rich friends are clueless, his townie coworkers at the dining hall resent him, and his crush is dating a professor. Then he goes home for spring break, where he’s confronted with a pregnant ex and a bunch of mobsters who try to interfere with his father’s lunch-truck business. I mostly read this book for completism--I love Perrotta, but The Wishbones made me wary of his earlier work--yet this seemingly lighthearted story contains some fascinating moral and ethical dilemmas, plus a hero who is sympathetic despite his callowness. 

18. Monsters of Men by Patrick Ness (2010)

In the explosive conclusion of Ness’s Chaos Walking trilogy, the protagonists find themselves in the middle of a war with an enemy they don’t understand, forcing them to wrestle with questions of right versus wrong, forgiveness versus revenge, and the possibility of redemption. This was an intense read, but there was a lot of genuine joy and love mixed in with the death and war.

17. Ashes to Ashes by Jenny Han and Siobhan Vivian (2014)

In the less literally but just as emotionally explosive conclusion of Han and Vivian’s Burn for Burn trilogy, former revenge-partners Lillia and Kat try to move on in the wake of a tragedy, as well as the abrupt departure of Mary, the other member of their retribution-themed trio. The future is looking bright, but then it becomes clear that Mary is neither gone nor happy with their life choices. I read the first book of this trilogy way back in 2014 and, while I enjoyed it well enough, I wasn’t blown away. This spring, though, I had the sudden urge to read the next two books, and they were both a wonderful mix of affecting human drama and ludicrously soapy plot twists.

16. The Charm School by Susan Wiggs (1999)

Isadora Peabody, the awkward scion of an otherwise graceful old Bostonian family in the 1850s, decides to take her fate in her own hands and become a translator on a merchant ship bound for Brazil. The captain, freewheeling Ryan Calhoun, isn’t too happy with this unusual arrangement, but he comes to admire and sympathize with the independent-minded and painfully self-conscious Isadora. At the same time, Isadora realizes that Ryan’s untidiness and occasional bouts of drunkenness disguise a heart and principles and a talent for making out in lush Brazilian gardens. I was absolutely delighted by this romance novel, which is an absolute romp with some terrific character development. 

15. The Ask and the Answer by Patrick Ness (2009)

In the middle book of the Chaos Walking trilogy, the protagonists reach the end of a long journey, only to find themselves separated and caught between two warring factions. This installment does a great job of elaborating upon the world introduced in the first book, offering new perspectives on old characters, and introducing compelling new conflicts. 

14. Fire with Fire by Jenny Han and Siobhan Vivian (2013)

In the middle book of the Burn for Burn trilogy, classmates Kat, Lillia, and Mary deal with the fallout of their semi-successful Strangers on a Train-lite revenge scheme. Kat and Lillia want to call it quits, but their sympathy for Mary causes them to agree to one last score, so to speak. Unfortunately, FEELINGS and PAST TRAUMA and DANGEROUS PSYCHIC POWERS complicate matters. Despite my love for Ashes to Ashes, Fire with Fire has a special place in my heart because it’s the first book to explore the characters’ emotions in depth, as well as the first one to go way over the fucking top.

13. I’ll Be Gone in the Dark by Michelle McNamara (2018)

In the late 1970s and early 1980s, a rash of horrifying home invasion rapes, seemingly meticulously planned, plagued the bedroom communities of Sacramento. Then a series of uncannily similar home invasion murders broke out in the Southern California. In this book published after her death in 2016, McNamara makes the case that this was the work of one person, dubbed the Golden State Killer. McNamara has a clear, humane way of describing grisly and/or convoluted events, and her portrait of the dark side of California suburbia is enthralling. 

12. The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver (1998)

In 1960, a dangerously determined and self-righteous reverend from the American South travels to the Belgian Congo, even though his own church begged him not to go. He makes the questionable decision to take his exhausted wife and four daughters--vain Rachel, suck-up Leah, nearly mute Adah, and baby Ruth May--along with him. Their new home is a shock to all of them in various ways, and that’s before a personal tragedy and the Congo Crisis enter the picture. Kingsolver makes excellent use of her five viewpoint characters, all of whom have distinctive voices and enjoyably unpredictable (yet entirely appropriate) character arcs.

11. Lighter than My Shadow by Katie Green (2013)

As a young child, Katie has seemingly minor issues around food, but during adolescence she develops a serious eating disorder and almost starves herself to death. A diagnosis and the ensuing support of her parents seem to signal hope, but recovery is more complicated that one might expect. This graphic memoir offers a nuanced portrait of the sheer range of stuff that gets wrapped up in an eating disorder: religion, gender, sex, control, trauma, the desire for independence, and so much more. Green’s “cute” art style enhances the story, both because it makes an interesting contrast to the upsetting material and because it grounds the reader in the humanity of the characters. 

10. Mindhunter by John Douglas and Mark Olshaker (1995)

Throughout the 1970s, FBI agent John Douglas, along with the rest of the Investigative Support Unit, compiled information about an increasingly common type of criminal: the serial killer. Gradually, they developed the practice of criminal profiling. As gruesome as it might sound to call this an excellent beach read, that’s essentially how I experienced it (not that I went anywhere this summer, but still). The pace is fast, the style is engaging, and the authors are frank but not overly lurid in their presentation of the nasty details.

9. The Beggar Maid by Alice Munro (1977)

In this collection of connected short stories, Rose, a bright Canadian girl, grows up in a rough, deprived neighborhood with her sick, stern father and prickly but not unloving stepmother. Life in the wider world brings her mingled pride and shame at her background, a largely disastrous early marriage, and eventually a satisfying but decidedly unglamorous acting career. Munro is a master of description, and she has a sense of fun that puts her head and shoulders above most short story writers. And the title story is just the most perfectly painful exploration of why someone would stay with a partner who is deeply wrong for them.

8. Dark Places by Gillian Flynn (2009)

In 1985, seven-year-old Libby Day narrowly escaped death at the hands of her teenage brother, but her mother and two older sisters weren’t so lucky. Except that Libby doesn’t feel so lucky, either, because she’s thirty-one years old with massive trauma, dwindling funds, and few adult life skills. Then a true-crime enthusiast contacts her with an offer: cash in return for investigating whether her brother was actually the murderer. Dark Places may be the awkward middle child of Flynn’s novels, but that reputation is undeserved; it has a thrilling plot, a perversely lovable heroine, and a sly critique of the “Morning in America” view of the 1980s.

7. The Hostage by Susan Wiggs (2000)

In the confusion of the Great Chicago Fire, frontiersman Tom Silver kidnaps heiress Deborah Sinclair, hoping to force her industrialist father into compensating the victims of his negligence. He’s not prepared, though, for her dogged escape attempts, her hard-earned resilience, or the hints that something was horribly wrong in her life even before the kidnapping. I had my doubts about reading a kidnapping romance, but Susan Wiggs proved me wrong. (It helps that Tom’s motives are both understandable AND not presented as an excuse for dragging Deborah into his revenge plan.) The super-slow-burn romance pairs wonderfully with the action-packed plot, and I love Deborah so much.

6. Sharp Objects by Gillian Flynn (2006)

Troubled reporter Camille Preaker returns to her small Missouri hometown to investigate the grisly murder of one tween girl and the ominous disappearance of another. As upsetting as the case is, it doesn’t hold a candle to what waits for her at home: a softly cruel mother, a barely there stepfather, and a teenage half-sister who alternates between adoring Camille and tormenting her. Sharp Objects entirely deserves its reputation as the best (if not most popular) Flynn novel; it has a beautifully constructed plot, descriptions so lush that you feel like you can reach out and touch Wind Gap (not that you’d want to), and a deeply flawed yet admirable heroine.

5. The Knife of Never Letting Go by Patrick Ness (2008)

At nearly thirteen, Todd Hewitt is the youngest resident of Prentisstown, and nobody is ever going to take that distinction away from him. Just after his birth, a plague killed most of the humans on New World, including every woman and girl. What’s more, the same plague made it so the thoughts of men (and most other living creatures) are audible to all. And the mayor of Prentisstown is a religious fanatic who won’t let anyone watch videos or teach kids to read. It’s...not awesome. Then Todd makes a shocking discovery that forces him to flee his community and question everything he knows. This book is a fascinating sci-fi take on the frontier horror story (ala The Scarlet Letter, The Crucible, and, more recently, The Witch) with a read-hundreds-of-pages-a-night plot and astonishing moment of wonder.

4. After the Wedding by Courtney Milan (2018)

Lady Camilla Worth, daughter of an earl who committed suicide to avoid treason charges, has passed from home to unwelcoming home ever since, finally ending up as an unknown housemaid. Adrian Hunter, a mixed-race ceramics heir on a desperate mission to make his family happy, happens to visit the house where she’s employed. Under some very strange circumstances, they’re forced to wed at literal gunpoint. Working together to unravel the mystery and get an annulment, they grow to like each other, which complicates things. This is one of my favorite romance novels ever, with wonderful characters (especially Camilla!), an explosive plot, and masterfully explored themes of healing and being true to oneself.

3. Wild Things: The Joy of Reading Children's Literature as an Adult by Bruce Handy (2017)

A famous magazine writer and father of two young children, Handy expounds upon the classics of children’s literature (The Cat in the Hat, Goodnight Moon, the Little House series, Narnia, the Ramona books, etc.). As someone who frequently rereads the favorites of my youth to de-stress (House of Stairs 5eva), the subject was tailor-made for me, and Handy’s execution is impressive. He covers an amazing amount of ground, switches deftly from one mode of analysis to another, and shares plenty of funny anecdotes and moving reflections on parenthood.

2. Blankets by Craig Thompson (2003)

In this autobiographical graphic novel, Craig, a creative, devout, and deeply lonely teenager in rural Wisconsin, meets his first love, Raina, at a church retreat that otherwise would’ve been miserable. They become pen pals and are finally able to arrange for him to spend a few complicated, wonderful weeks with her and her family. Their relationship and its subsequent fallout drive him to confront his conflicted feelings about his faith, his art, and his family. This is an absolutely beautiful story, complemented perfectly by the wintry landscapes and expressive human figures.

1. Breath by Donna Jo Napoli (2003)

Salz, a twelve-year-old boy in medieval Saxony, is dismissed and sometimes even reviled by most of his community, including his own father and brothers, for the unnamed illness that stunts his growth and makes it difficult to breathe. Still, he’s got a lot going on; he helps his beloved grandmother around the house, studies for the priesthood, and belongs to a secret coven. When an abnormally wet spring drives the rats indoors and causes a strange disease to spread among the locals, Salz’s sharp intellect and thirst for knowledge are more needed than ever. This novel is a historically grounded retelling of “The Pied Piper of Hamelin” where the protagonist has cystic fibrosis, and did I ever think I would type that combination of words? No, I did not, but I am so glad things worked out that way. Napoli’s treatment of disability is unusually gratifying, because she illustrates the essential things that a society loses when it dismisses the sick and disabled (as well as some other marginalized groups, such as women). At the same time, Salz’s family and neighbors aren’t cruel for the sake of cruelty; they’re just uninformed, scared, and/or bad at managing their own problems without lashing out at others, which does not absolve them but makes for a more thoughtful story than if they were just bad seeds. The portrayal of Salz’s struggles to reconcile the different sources of wisdom in his life--Church orthodoxy, pagan folk practices, and the knowledge slowly filtering in from the Arabic world--is also fascinating, plus the pathological mystery makes for a tight, exciting plot. All this in less than 300 pages! And do not get me started on how much I love Großmutter.

[chaolskingdom]

Throne of Glass Playlist/Songs thingy + SPOTIFY LINKS

So because I always search for these kinds of playlist posts when I am super deep in the fandom of something and I listen to a lot of songs that really remind me of the ToG series I thought I’d try to make one myself lol (Some songs may double if I feelk like they fit multiple Characters) If I wrote the Booktitles after the Songtitle it means that I thought of a specific scene when listening to the song so yeee…also feel free to message me with songs that I could add cause I really wish I could find some more for Rowan, Lysandra, Aedion, Elide etc.

(Click on the headers to get to the Spotify playlists!)

ACOTAR Playlist

ToG in General

Game of Survival - Ruelle (QoS, EoS)

Dead of Night - Ruelle (QoS)

Secrets and Lies - Ruelle

Hero - Ruelle

Monsters - Ruelle (QoS, EoS)

Madness - Ruelle

Home - AURORA (QoS)

Recover - Ruelle

Kings and Queens and Vagabonds - Ellem

Take it all - Ruelle (QoS, EoS)

Up in Flames - Ruelle (QoS, EoS)

Battlefield - SVARCINA (QoS, EoS)

Tomorrow We Fight - SVRCINA

Ready Aim Fire - Imagine Dragons (QoS, EoS, KoA I guess)

Heroes - Zayde Wolf

Warriors - Imagine Dragons

Heathens - Twenty One Pilots

Immortals - Fall Out Boy

Gold - Imagine Dragons

Mars - Sleeping at Last

Who We Are - Imagine Dragons

Atlas - Coldplay

Fleurie - Hurricane

This Ship Is Going Down - Xeah (QoS - KoA I guess)

Empires - Ruelle (QoS - KoA I guess)

Sound Off The Sirens - Sam Tinnesz (QoS - KoA I guess)

Heart of the Darkness - Sam Tinnesz

Everybody Wants To Rule The World - Lorde

Wolves - Sam Tinnesz ft. Silverberg

Breathe - Fleurie (EoS)

This is the Hunt - Ruelle (CoM, HoF, QoS, EoS)

Unstoppable - The Score

Live Like Legends - Ruelle

Kings - Tribe Society

Glory and Gore - Lorde (EoS)

Waves of Gray - Ruelle (EoS, KoA)

The Downfall - Ruelle (EoS - KoA)

Revolution- Unsecret ft. Ruelle (QoS - KoA)

United - Hidden Citizens (KoA I guess)

Devil in me - Halsey (literally fits almost every character)

North - Sleeping at last

Torches - x ambassadors

Fire Meets Fate - Ruelle (End of CoM - EoS)

When It’s All Over - RAIGN (EoS)

Silhouette - Aquilo (QoS-KoA)

Between The Wars - Allman Brown (QoS-KoA)

Wicked - Tommee Profitt (QoS - KoA)

Feel That Fire - Tommee Profitt (EoS - KoA)

Can’t Hold Us Down - Tommee Profitt 

One Eye Open - Tommee Profitt 

Do You Hear The People Sing - Les Misérables 

Rise - Leage of Legends (HoF - KoA)

Here We Stand - Hidden Citizens (EoS - KoA)

Onward & Upward - Tommee Profitt (EoS - KoA)

Noble Blood - Tommee Profitt

Undone - Tommee Profitt (QoS - KoA)

Sound of War - Tommee Profitt

We Have It All - Pim Stones

Celaena/Aelin

Runnin’ - Adam Lambert (HoF,QoS)

Warrior - AURORA

Runaway - AURORA

Rival - Ruelle

Revolution - Diplo

Revolution - The Score

Born Ready - Zayde Wolf

Champion - Barns Courtney

Street Fight - Adam Jensen

Beekeeper - Keaton Henson (Assassins Blade, ToG)

Little Pistol - Mother Mother (Assassins Blade)

Monster - Beth Crowley

Battle Cry - Imagine Dragons

Kill Everyone - Hollywood Undead (Assassins Blade)

Another Way Out - Hollywood Undead (Assassins Blade)

Glory and Gore - Lorde (Assassins Blade)

Whatever It Takes - Imagine Dragons

Look what you made me do - Taylor Swift

Yellow Flicker Beat - Lorde

A Little Wicked - Valerie Broussard

The Hate Inside - Sam Tinnesz

Play With Fire - Sam Tinnesz

Battle Cry - Beth Crowley

Will I Make It Out Alive - Jessie Early

Legends Are Made - Sam Tinnesz

My Domain - SVRCINA

These Roots - Grey

I'm Not Afraid - Wondra (espescially Assassins Blade)

Paint It, Black - Ciara (Assassins Blade)

When The Sun Goes Down - Laney Jones

Devil Devil - MILCK (to Arobynn)

The Devil Within - Digital Daggers (to Arobynn)

No More Heroes - Aviators

Castle - Halsey

Gasoline - Halsey

Invincible - Ruelle (EoS)

Hold Your Breath - Ruelle (EoS)

Until We Go Down - Ruelle (QoS - KoA)

Natural - Imagine Dragons

You Should See Me In A Crown - Billie Eilish

This Is My World - Esterly (QoS - KoA)

Ember - Katherine McNamara (toward Arobynn, The King)

New Blood - Zayde Wolf (QoS-KoA)

Glitter and Gold - Barns Courtney

I Apologize - Five Finger Death Punch (HoF)

Watch me - The Phantoms (QoS - EoS)

Silent Running - Hidden Citizens (HoF - KoA)

Survivor - 2WEI (HoF - KoA)

Far From Home - Sam Tinnesz

The Heart of the Raven - Mono Inc. (Celaenas farewell to Nehemia)

Risk It All - Mono Inc. (HoF - KoA)

Here I Am - Tommee Profitt

Gloria Regali - Tommee Profitt

Dorian

Bad Dream - Ruelle (QoS)

Dead of Night - Ruelle (QoS)

Deep End - Ruelle (QoS)

Hollow - Cloudeater (QoS)

Control - Halsey (QoS)

Monster - Starset (QoS)

Man or Monster - Sam Tinnesz ft. Zayde Wolf (QoS)

Bad Man - Esterly ft. Austin Jenckes (Hof,QoS also kinda EoS)

Run Boy Run - Woodkid

King - Lauren Aquilina

Lonely - Yoe Mase

Brother - Kodaline (BCS HIS FRIENDSHIP WITH CHAOL OH GOD)

Crossfire - Stephen

The Driver - Bastille

This Is My World - Esterly (EoS-KoA)

Silent Running - Hidden Citizens (EoS-KoA)

I Apologize - Five Finger Death Punch (EoS)

Survivor - 2WEI (EoS)

Risk It All - Mono Inc.

Here I Am - Tommee Profitt (EoS - KoA)

Gloria Regali - Tommee Profitt

Chaol

Bad Dream - Ruelle (HoF,QoS)

Crossfire - Stephen

We must be Killers - Mikky Ekko

Shattered - Trading Yesterday (ToD)

I’ll Be Good - James Young (ToD)

The Downfall - Ruelle (EoS, QoS)

The Draw - Bastille

Infinitesimal - Mother Mother

All The Kings Horses - Karmina

The Driver - Bastille

Lonely - Yoe Mase

Same Mistake-James Blunt

Nothing Left - Beth Crowley (End of CoM)

You're Somebody Else - Flora Cash (to Aelin End of CoM, QoS)

Brohter - Kodaline (AGAIN BCS DORIAN)

Breaking Inside - Shinedown

Who Are You, Really? - Mikky Ekko (end of CoM - QoS)

Wrong Side of Heaven - Five Finger Death Punch (HoF)

I Apologize - Five Finger Death Punch (HoF - QoS)

Risk It All - Mono Inc. (HoF, QoS)

No One’s Here To Sleep - Naughty Boy

Deep End - Ruelle (HoF, QoS)

Manon

Whose side are you on - Ruelle (EoS)

Battle Cry - Beth Crowley (EoS)

A Little Wicked - Valerie Broussard (HoF, QoS)

The Downfall - Ruelle (EoS)

Running With The Wolves - AURORA

Monster - Beth Crowley

Go To War - Nothing More

Battle Cry - Imagine Dragons

What I’ve Done - Linkin Park

Monster - Starset

Man or Monster - Sam Tinnesz ft. Zayde Wolf

I'm Not Afraid - Wondra

No More Heroes - Aviators

My Domain - SVRCINA

Two Evils - Bastille

Viva La Vida - Coldplay

Natural - Imagine Dragons

This Is My World - Esterly (EoS)

Ember - Katherine McNamara (EoS)

New Blood - Zayde Wolf (EoS)

Watch Me - The Phantoms

Glitter and Gold - Barns Courtney

Ready Set Let’s Go - Sam Tinnesz (EoS)

You Should See Me In A Crown - Billie Eilish

Wrong Side of Heaven - Five Finger Death Punch (EoS)

I Apologize - Five Finger Death Punch (EoS)

Risk It All - Mono Inc. (EoS)

No One’s Here To Sleep - Naughty Boy

Here I Am - Tommee Profitt

Witching Hour - Tommee Profitt (EoS)

Aedion

Meet me on the Battlefield - SVRCINA

Warriors - Imagine Dragons

Believer - Imagine Dragons

Thunder - Imagine Dragons

Control - Halsey

Today We Rise - Galavant 

Iron - Woodkid (THIS FITS SO WELL I WANT TO CRAWL MY EYES OUT)

Soldier - Fleurie

Casualty - Hidden Citizens

Natural - Imagine Dragons

This Is My World - Esterly

I Apologize - Five Finger Death Punch

Wrong Side of Heaven - Five Finger Death Punch

Far From Home - Sam Tinnesz

Risk It All - Mono Inc. (HoF)

Winter’s Song - Tommee Profitt (Bcs of his loyality to Aelin)

Others

Meet me on the Battlefield - SVRCINA (Elide)

Blame - Bastille (Arobynn)

Something Wild - Lindsey Stirling (Elide)

Unbreakable - Nick Howard (Elide)

These Roots - Grey (Elide)

I know your secrets - Tommee Profitt (Lysandra/Celaena toward Arobynn

The Devil Within - Digital Daggers (Lysandra/Celaena toward Arobynn)

Welcome To Hell - Mono Inc. (Lysandra/Celaena toward Arobynn)

My Domain - SVRCINA (Lysandra)

Team - Lorde (Aelins Court)

The ones that like me - Brantley Gilbert (Gavriel)

Two Evils - Bastille

Ships  (All Ships)

Rowaelin

Bring me back to life - Extreme Music 

Lover.Fighter. - SVARCINA 

Wildfire - Seafret 

Beautiful Mess - Kristian Kostov

Find You - Ruelle (end of EoS, KoA I guess)

Warrior - Beth Crowley 

Carry You - Ruelle

Pieces - Red

Even if it Hurts - Sam Tinnesz

Wicked Game - Ursine Vulpine  

Remembering myself - Stephen (HoF)

Burning Heart - SVRCINA (HoF)

Brave - Riley Pearce

Hold on for your Life - Tommee Profitt (EoS/KoA)

Winter’s Song - Tommee Profitt

Remembrance - Tommee Profitt

Chaolaena

Walk Through The Fire - Zayde Wolf ft. Ruelle (CoM)

Remembering myself - Stephen (CoM)

The Scientist - Coldplay

Let Her Go - Passenger 

Sorry - Halsey

Better now - Etham (after CoM)

The Other Side - Ruelle (after CoM)

Wicked Game - Ursine Vulpine   

Talk - Kodaline

Dynasty - MIIA

Tearing us Apart - Honora 

Already Gone - Sleeping at Last

Celorian

Let it die - Starset

Young God - Halsey 

I can’t make you love me - Dave Thomas Junior (ToG, CoM)

Wicked Game - Ursine Vulpine    

Sam X Celaena

Dark on me - Starset

Die for you - Starset 

Hymn For The Missing - Red 

So I thought - Flyleaf

Still here - Digital Daggers

Hold My Girl - George Ezra

We Have It All - Pim Stones

Chaol X Yrene

Pieces - Red

Even if it Hurts - Sam Tinnesz 

Fix You - Coldplay 

My Demons Acoustic - Starset

Dusk Till Dawn - Zayn ft. Sia 

Next to me - Imagine Dragons 

Carry You - Ruelle

Wicked Game - Ursine Vulpine

Weight - Crywolf   

Remembering myself - Stephen   

I Found - Amber Run

Can You Hold Me - NF

Smokestacks - Layla

Brave - Riley Pearce

Hold My Girl - George Ezra 

Heal - Tom Odell

Winter’s Song - Tommee Profitt

Remembrance - Tommee Profitt

Dorian X Sorsha

Another Love - Tom Odell 

Saturn - Sleeping at last 

Weight - Crywolf

Hurts like Hell - Fleurie

Wicked Game - Ursine Vulpine    

Carry You - Ruelle

Can You Hold Me - NF

Hold My Girl - George Ezra

Heal - Tom Odell

Where’s My Love - SYML

In My Veins - Andrew Belle

Manorian

Dixie Boy - April Smith

Play me like a violin - Stephen

Come Fly With Me - Ruelle

Wicked Game - Ursine Vulpine  

I Found - Amber Run

War of Hearts - Ruelle 

bury a friend - Billie Eilish

Midnight Oil - Tommee Profitt

Other Ships

Brother - Kodaline (Dorian and Chaols friendship lol, also Aedion and Aelins friendship)

Talk - Kodaline (Dorian and Chaols Friendship in CoM, HoF)

Unsteady - x ambassadors (Lysaedion)

Weight - Crywolf (Elide x Lorcan)

This gets updated regularly! ~ Last Updated: February 15th 2021

~Chaolskingdom

[fredheads]

@halcooper i had the afternoon off so i put together a second draft of parentdale: the musical (music and lyrics by jim steinman)

STARRING:  Alice Cooper as herself | Hal Cooper as himself Mary Andrews as herself | Fred Andrews as himself Hermione Lodge as herself | Hiram Lodge as himself Penelope Blossom as herself | FP Jones as himself Clifford Blossom as himself | Tom Keller as himself & Company (incl. Agent Adams, Andre, Penny Peabody & Serpents, Sierra McCoy) 

COSTUME: unless otherwise specified, leather skirts and mesh tops for the gals, leather pants and mesh tops for the guys. 

ACT ONE

wasted youth (monologue) - fred

FRED: "Stop! Wait a minute! Stop it boy! What do you think you're doing? That's no way to treat an expensive musical instrument!" And I said "God dammit Daddy! You know I love you, but you've got a hell of a lot to learn about rock and roll!"

all revved up with no place to go - hal, hiram, fred, fp

scene: Hal & the other dads get ready for a night out (hal wears a good christian sweater and slacks) 

HAL: I’m just a blue-eyed, blonde-haired, black-hearted boy killing time until the end of the world

dead ringer for love - ensemble

scene: the moms & dads arrive separately at the whyte wyrm. hal and alice meet and flirt up a storm. they sing the lead parts with everyone else as backup. 

ALICE: I don't have to know your name and I won't tell you what to do but a girl, she doesn't live by only rock 'n roll and brew

who needs the young - penelope & clifford duet

scene: at thornhill in front of the fire, penelope and clifford lament their lost youth and complain about the youth of today. penelope, still young herself, is more than a little bittersweet. 

CLIFFORD: Who needs the young? The celebration of the races that they've have won The sado-masochistic things they've never done

PENELOPE: Disgusting. 

good girls go to heaven  - alice, hal & ensemble (all the women sing background for alice’s part while hal sings the “good boys go to heaven” verses with fp and hiram) 

scene: in their respective homes on each side of the tracks, alice reconciles her serpent identity with her love for northsider Hal while Hal tries to work up the nerve to be a bad boy for once. FP lends him a leather jacket so he can fit the part. 

FP: you’ve been nothing but an angel every day of your life and now you wonder what it’s like to be damned

it just won’t quit - fp (other serpents sing background)

scene: alone on the southside, fp confesses his agonizing love for fred. fred, onstage, is oblivious. 

FP: Is this a blessing? Or is it a curse? Does it get any better? Can it get any worse? Will it go on forever? Is it over tonight? Does it come with the darkness? Does it bring out the light? Is it richer than diamonds? Or just a little cheaper than spit?

out of the frying pan and into the fire - fred & ensemble 

scene: fred and mary, from senior prom to their wedding night to their house with the white picket fence. Mary ends up in a wedding dress holding a swaddled baby. Hermione and FP are maid of honour and best man, respectively. Everyone sings background. 

FRED: Open the door and lay down on the bed, The sun is just a ball of desire And I want to take you out of the frying pan And into the fire 

which leads into... two out of three ain’t bad - fred & mary duet 

scene: mary leaves fred

FRED: Well there's only one girl I'll ever love And that was so many years ago And though I know I'll never get her out of my heart She never loved me back, ooh I know 

I remember how she left me on a stormy night She kissed me and got out of our bed And though I pleaded and I begged her not to walk out that door She packed her bags and turned right away

- ACT TWO - 

in the land of the pig, the butcher is king - hiram ft. agent adams, andre

scene: hiram gleefully plots his evil deeds. at the same time, unbeknownst to him, hermione begins to question if this life is right for her. 

HIRAM: With that we can take and pocket No one needs to know We're is the plug and they're the socket Give us the juice and we'll go

objects in the rearview mirror - fred, fp, tom  (fred sings the first verse, fp the second, tom the third) 

scene: fred, fp and tom reminisce on their wasted youths

FP: And my father’s eyes were blank as he hit me again and again and again

i’m gonna love her for both of us (first verse) - fred 

scene: hermione flees hiram’s nefariousness and goes back to fred, her high school flame. 

FRED: I can't stand to see it no more The way you're living with a goddess, but you treat her like a slave And you can't hold her back anymore She's like a dreamer in a dungeon, or an angel in a cave

making love out of nothing at all - penelope  (hal sings background at the end... but he’s singing about alice) 

scene: penelope sings about her unrequited love for hal 

PENELOPE: Everytime I see you all the rays of the sun are Streaming through the waves in your hair And every star in the sky is taking aim at Your eyes like a spotlight The beating of my heart is a drum, and it's lost And it's looking for a rhythm like you

paradise by the dashboard light - fred and hermione (it goes without saying but hermione sings “let me sleep on it” and fred sings “do you love me? will you love me forever?”) 

scene: in their old car at the twilight drive-in, fred and hermione play themselves at (barely) seventeen about to get it on. fred wears his old letterman jacket at first. 

BOTH: So now I'm praying for the end of time To hurry up and arrive! Cause if I gotta spend another minute with you I don't think that I can really survive! 

what part of my body hurts the most - hermione & hiram 

scene: separated, hermione and hiram realize how much they miss each other. hermione’s realized she can never make it with fred and she likes being bad, while all the murder and mayhem in the world can’t fill hiram’s heart. 

HERMIONE: You'll always be here with me, you're a ghost and I've been cursed But if you were exorcised, it would only make it worse A demon or angel — it doesn't matter all that much I toss and I turn every night and I try to feel your touch

- ACT THREE - 

for crying out loud - everyone

scene: hermione and hiram, hal and alice, and (finally!) fred and fp sing about how much they love each other. 

FRED: Oh I know you belong inside my aching heart And can't you see my faded Levis bursting apart FP: And don't you hear me crying Oh babe, don't go FRED: And don't you hear me screaming How was I to know?

you took the words right out of my mouth - fred & fp with ensemble

scene: fred and fp confess their burning love and make out in their leather pants. 

FRED: It was a hot summer night and the beach was burning There was fog crawling over the sand FP: And when I listened to your heart I hear the whole world turning I see the shooting stars falling through your trembling hands

i’m gonna love her for both of us (reprise) - alice

scene: alice rescues penelope from clifford and brings her back to be with her and hal! 

ALICE: When the screws are tightnin' and the tears are falling I can hear her crying out to be saved And like a bolt of lightning I go answer the call But she's singing like a siren to me over the waves

it’s all coming back to me now - hermione & hiram duet

scene: hiram and hermione pledge their undying love to each other (and the mob). in the background, fred and mary forgive and forget, although they’ve both moved on and are happy apart. 

HIRAM: There were moments of gold and there were flashes of light HERMIONE: There were things I'd never do again But then they'd always seemed right BOTH: There were nights of endless pleasure It was more than any laws allow

i’d do anything for love (but i won’t do that) - ensemble

scene: the finale: a big song and dance number where everyone loves each other again. penelope, alice and hal are a throuple. fp and fred are on his motorbike. 

HERMIONE: Will you raise me up? will you help me down? Will you get me right out of this godforsaken town? Will you make it all a little less cold?

HIRAM: I can do that

FP: Can you hold me sacred, can you hold me tight?  Will you colourize my life, I’m so sick of black and white?  Will you make it all a little less old?  FRED: I can do that

PENELOPE: Can you make me some magic with your own two hands?  Can you build an emerald city with these grains of sand? Can you give me something I can take home

HAL: I can do that

ALICE: Will you cater to every fantasy I got? Will you hose me down with holy water, if I get too hot? Will you take me places I've never known?

HAL: I can do that Oh no, no, I can do that

FP, HIRAM, ALICE: I know the territory, I've been around It'll all turn to dust and we'll all fall down Sooner or later you'll be screwing around

FRED, HERMIONE, HAL: (after a long pause) I won't do that.