#and then I felt...... sooo alienated and alone for the last part

[rawliverandcigarettes]

Reading about a cool post about romancing a more diverse set of aliens in the next Mass Effect (yes please), I'm realizing I'd really want more focus on different ways to get close to NPCs that don't necesserily involve smooches or sex scenes. I know that would explode the budget, but... I don't know, I see room for a relationship system that does not 100% rely on the "is romanced" boolean, where cutscenes/missions activate or do not activate depending on the specifics of the relationship you're developing with a given character (with a tag system for example).

That way, there is a conversation where you pour your heart out with a given character that is available whether or not you romance them, but that you *could* miss out on if you decide to romance them but put the focus on the more competitive aspect of your relationship instead of the vulnerability. A sort of web of possible situations that would tailor more closely to who you are as a PC and how you want to engage with the world without betraying the NPC.

That would imply uhhhh budget, and a very strong relationship design system (let me design it bioware wait actually don't I could not handle working on mass effect emotionally I think). But. Would be cool, and would allow me to RP aroace characters without feeling completely alone and adrift in the uncaring void of space. :3

[kasagia]

hi, my dear! i just read losing your memory part 1 & 2 and when i tell you! i‘m in love! your writing is immaculate and sooo good, i‘m literally on my way now to read your other work as well!! i hope you have a great time :)

AAAA! Thank you very much! You don't even know how much motivation it gives me to write! (Especially when a lot of strange and different things have been happening in my life lately.) 🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵

I'm soooo glad you like it! (And that you're interested in more.) 😅🙈

Also, thank you so much, dear two anonymous! 🩵🩵🖤🖤

And since you asked, I'll give you a little insight into what will happen in 'part three'. Which I'll get to soon, but I have to finish writing 'District boy' first. (Maybe I'll post tomorrow if all goes well. But I'm a little scared because my imagination has gone crazy and I don't know if it's good or bad.) 🙈🙈

Thank you! 🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤

A fragment from [LYM 'universum'] "Marry me (unless you don't want to)" - which is comming soon...

~•♤♤♤•~

"Hope dies last. If I were them, I would rather die fighting for my rights as a free human being than in the arena for the joy of sick people like Dr. Gaul and…" you stop, biting your tongue at the last moment. However, this does not go unnoticed by him.

"And who? C'mon. Finish." He asks angrily, looking at you defiantly. You clench your fists and look away from him, staring at the window overlooking the centre of the Capitol.

"Get out of my office." You say it in a tone devoid of any emotion, even though you're internally shaking hysterically.

This wasn't supposed to look like this. You had the whole plan ready, but of course Coriolanus wouldn't be himself if he didn't do something you didn't even think he could do.

"As you wish, Madam President. Don't forget about your wedding dress fitting with Tigris. Unless you don't want to marry a psychopath like me."

"Coryo..." he slams the door loudly behind him, leaving you alone in your office.

You shiver, rubbing your arms with your hands. You sit back at your desk and try to go back to the documents and reports you were looking through before he stormed into your office. You take the pen in your hand, but refrain from taking any further notes or comments. Your engagement ring is gleaming in the lamplight, mockingly reminding you that this man should be your support, not your opponent.

You've never felt so cold, empty, and alien there as you do now. And you involuntarily wonder if your marriage with Coryo will be like this forever. The eternal fight over who is right and who among you cares more about Panem...

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s2 episode 6 thoughts

sighs as if i just ran a marathon.

so, you know i take a LOT of notes. but this episode was SUCH a ride that i'm gonna try a new method of copying all this down. stick with me and let's see how it goes.

okay here we are. back after our brief and sorrow-filled separation yesterday, in which i had no time to watch an episode. it’s Scully hours. hopefully.

first thing we see is mulder walking into his place in the rain. first thing i do is pause and see if i can analyze the art on his walls. they’re some sort of prints of houses? not noticing anything in particular in terms of style or artist. and it’s definitely a new place where he lives, rip the sleep couch from s1

he takes off his jacket and listens to the message she left him and oh fuck. oh fuck. her voice. the sound of duane yelling. shattering glass.

he goes to her house and sees blood and the open window!!!! the TERROR that man must have been feeling. and he uses that FBI id to sneak right in there.

now he’s prowling about her house in search of clues and looking at her blood and hair left behind which is fucked up, even by my standards 

it was at this point i wrote "he’s like a bloodhound" which is a statement i stand by and can elaborate on if prompted

OH! we see a familiar face. he meets scully's mom. while his hands are soaked in her daughter’s blood. that's okay that's fine (said in a shaking and squeaky voice).

THE OPENING SAID SOMETHING DIFFERENT: DENY EVERYTHING. WHAT DOES IT MEAN?

(at this point i made a note expressing concern that we were gonna watch scully get tortured for 45 minutes straight and thank god that isn't what actually went down. because i would have been deeply upset if that had happened and would have launched upon an unstoppable rant for the next few generations)

scully's mom dreamed about her being taken away and Mulder WRAPS HIS ARMS AROUND HER. again. while still covered in her blood. what a way to meet her family. not how anyone had pictured this going down.

so it's the next morning and alex is in this meeting while mulder is having a come apart. don’t wish him to be here. and no, alex does not get the respect of being referred to by his last name like a good agent on MY account where i make the rules and the rules are that he sucks.

when rationalizing what duane is going through, skinner said “so he’s following orders from the alien voices in his head? That’s an interesting spin on the Nuremberg defense” and yeah! i chuckled. was he wrong there?

skinner made me laugh with that little remark but then went back to pissing me off by telling mulder he was too close to the case and needed to go home. like yes, he’s right, but mulder's gonna put his bloodhound skills to destructive purposes. he's gonna rip up the couch if left home alone. in a dog metaphorical sense.

so alex takes him home which was bad enough (alex must know where mulder lives to do that) and we see CIGARETTE MAN IN THE BACKGROUND????? my original notes had a lot stronger language at this reveal that i felt i needed to tone down but i will keep the "i'll have ur head im sooo serious" part in

okay, back to duane cam. he’s cruising. he cranks his window down when he’s pulled over which is still funny to me. crank windows. how novel. but don't think i've forgotten the situation at hand just because 90's technology is funny to me.

a cop pulls him over and i felt a flicker of hope inside my chest but i knew deep down it was still too early in the episode for anything to be resolved. still, duane pulling out his gun and SHOOTING the cop made my jaw drop

(my jaw kept dropping this episode to an extent that was painful. i just got my wisdom teeth out and while i love enjoying this show, the constant twists and turns are NOT leading to a pleasant mouth experience)

SCULLY IN THE TRUNK REVEAL? <- that was all i wrote when i saw here in there. i feel it sums up the situation.

mulder, somehow, taps into where she's located and gets a visual on her. he is intensely effected and this is why i support his bloodhound-like tendencies being channeled. the man gets results.

alex, don’t ask how he slept. you are a rat and should be banished from his presence during his state of mourning and forever after. 

mulder: doesn't route 229 lead to the blue ridge parkway?

alex: I don’t know <- okay lmao I get that. i get that alex. like directions are hard. you haven't won me over but you did make me laugh here.

mulder figured out where they’re going and says GET THE CAR ALEX and that “he’ll deal with skinner”. ohhh i wanna see this furious mulder deal with skinner. OHHHH i'm so on the edge of my seat this sleep deprived man is gonna <- didn't even finish that sentence due to the next reveal

WHO THE HELL IS ALEX TALKING TO ABOUT “HOLDING HIM OFF” WHY IS CIGGY MAN HERE (can you hear the desperation in all of the notes i was taking. also i don't know his name and i don't care. that's cigarette man or ciggy man if i need to use shorthand and his government name is probably "rat bastard" but i don't care enough to use it)

mulder was, at this point, falling asleep and almost hitting a truck but insisting he can still drive. wild. on the one hand, i get it, because alex is probably gonna drive them off the road and something, but then on the other hand buddy. u almost got plowed in the negative context. someone fetch him a red bull

(and yeah i googled "red bull origins" to see if that would have been possible at the time for mulder to have a sip and can confirm it would have been IF he had gotten it imported from another country. because it wasn't in the us yet. i am a scholar)

alex is listing how many awful things are caused by sleep deprivation. which i understand and again, a good argument to be made, but this grease weasel just wants to get behind the wheel so he can total the thing and i'm not having it 

(he said some like after this and it was just “there’s our turn off” but my hatred for him reached a crescendo at this point like I could have started pummeling)

so they get to the place on the mountain that takes you up- the ski lift thingy. and the guy who works it is like "you can't use it, we don't test it in the summer" and wow. when i tell you what happens next, i hope you are seated. because i had to pause and breathe for a bit.

MULDER PULLS HIS GUN OUT AND THREATENS THE DUDE WHO SAYS HE CAN’T TAKE THE CABLE SKI THINGY UP OHHHHH MY GAWDDDDD 

so he gets access to the lift thingy and he locked alex out… yes exactly right!

the lift operator is like "don't go over 15 miles per hour" and we all know what mulder is gonna do next. he cranks it up way too fast and he’s gonna fall into the mountain and i’m looking around my room like what is going on here. the cuts to Alex’s snaky eyes are freaking me tf out. Why is alex reaching for his gun. WHAT THE FUCK WHY FID HE KNOCK THAT GIY OUT HE CIT THE GENERATOR AND LEFT MULDER UP THERE WHO IS HE CALLONH 

(<- leaving that one verbatim from my notes, too, because i feel it really captures the experience, if you can work out those typos. basically alex took his gun out and knocked the lift operator out, leaving mulder stranded on the ski lift in the sky, then called someone like "i've got him trapped" and i. was experiencing all of this very quickly.)

scully cam. she’s still in the trunk.

so the power's cut on the ski lift and mulder is not gonna just sit around and wait for somebody to help him! he's climbing up the tower and once he’s up there ALEX TURNS THE MACHINE BACK ON SERIOUSLY WHAT IS GOING ON

mulder survives the journey to the mountain's peak, despite almost falling off because he was hanging from outside!! and alex looks soooooooooooo mad.

sad man in the rain finds a car with blood in the wheel and...

HER NECKLACE IN THE BACK!!! AN EPISODE 3 CALL BACK!!! to when he knew eugene tooms was going after her because he found her necklace. oh i'm gonna be SICK

back to our worstie duane, who is in the woods screaming that they took her and that he’s free and I had to pause to breathe a lil. because if mulder lost scully and his sister to aliens...... 

after what was intended to be a commercial break and some wrestling on behalf of mulder, we see duane in custody, but receive no answers on what exactly is going on. he is, however, in a small room with mulder, who looks entirely diabolical.

mulder is stalking this guy- "stalking" in the sense that he is like a predator waiting for a chance to pounce on a rabbit- and he gets up and SEES SCULLY'S BLOOD AND HAIR ON DUANE'S HOSPITAL WRISTBAND???

next occurs what i described in my notes as the "DID YOU HURT HER SCREAMING AND TORTURE SESSION. JAW IS ON THE FLOOR" (my poor jaw. who will think of her in these trying times)

again, mulder is in his animal era, because he starts choking duane. REALLY choking him. i'm shocked. between this and the showing his gun to get to the top of the mountain, we are really seeing how he will throw all of the rules to the side and spit on them to keep the people he loves safe.

(i was also thinking to myself at this point, his ass is gonna get fired)

duane was taunting him, saying "i hope they’re not hurting her too much with the tests” which is. obviously evil. but HOW evil? it's still unclear if he is lying about the whole alien thing, because remember, scully said the bullet in his brain makes him a liar who is unpredictable. and i guess a bullet could maybe do that. i have no experience in such matters.

mulder says everyone STAY OUT OF THERE and yet. alex goes in to see duane. and is like "well i went in there because he was gagging". sure yeah. suspicious. why were you close enough to hear him gag? how do you know the sound of another man gagging, alex? heard it before?

okay this next part was. pretty messed up. i'll let my reactions from being in the moment speak for themselves because i have little desire to relive the matter:

SCULLY IN A WEIRD ASS ROOM???? THE ALIENS? What the hell I’m deeply uncomfortable are they blowing her up like a balloon. Oh I got chills. Negative 

(i never want to see a character blown up like a balloon it's just not for me. i am always gonna be good on that front)

((who is blowing her up and why. i was convinced it was aliens at first but now i think it was actually the Evil Government which has me thinking, what kind of situation led them to developing that technology in the first place?))

mulder pulls alex out of the room “NO ONE is to interrogate the suspect” “except you?” “except me” <- mulder with a god complex because scully is missing and he will do ANYTHING to find her. oh yeah that's juicy. i'm gonna dive into that at a later date.

skinner yells at mulder. yeah he had it coming. even if i enjoy his character arc i do think choking your only suspect comes across as a bit. well. unprofessional, shall we say.

mulder is shocked that duane is gagging like he didn’t just choke the guy and he might have KILLED his own best lead and has to live with whatever knowledge duane had on her whereabouts dying with him 

mulder staring at the corpse. cause of death: asphyxiation. oh he killed that dude. he is gonna be in trouble. 

(that was my first thought, anyway. i wasn't picking up what mulder was putting down, requesting a toxicology report. to me, if you show a scene of a guy getting choked, and then he dies a few minutes later, it's another situation of "i don't know enough about medical stuff to dispute that". mulder, however, WILL dispute that)

next part is copied and pasted from the rough notes again because it's funny:

"alex go fuck yourself i don’t even wanna look at you. getting in the car with ciggy man. “what about scully?” “we’ve taken care of that” ARE YOU THE MFER BLOWING HER UP LIKE A BALLOON CIGGY MAN???? alex is questioning things but idgaf if he’s morally conflicted"

(i saw the seeds of an alex redemption arc being sown here and i didn't care for it. condemn him. to the dungeons.)

mulder’s super insistent that he did NOT kill duane and again i was like. well are you sure. because it kinda looks like you did.

they want him to take a lie detector test which always makes me cringe. if polygraphs have no haters its because i'm dead.

mulder believes that duane was actually poisoned by the government to hide Something and he presents this theory to skinner and his panel which was Bold but you know our boy mulder. bold is what he does.

“why are you so paranoid Mulder” asks some random guy from the council in an annoyed fashion << terribly insensitive thing to say to guy who just had his best friend kidnapped

“I find it hard to trust anybody” (cutscene to asking Alex for his keys) NAURRR YOU CANNOT TRUST THE WEASEL 

alex gives him the keys and leaves with a long lingering stare. okay. freak.

mulder's going to the senator!!!! i was hoping we would get more info on that whole deal- why does this guy sponsor mulder? why does he do it if he knows it's a bad idea? how do they even know each other? is he a republican? - but we really don't gain any insight. he runs into Deep Throat 2.0, who I believe to be a handsome fellow, and he says that They will deny everything

who is they, i mumble quietly to the screen. why do they know all the things??

mulder is in visible and irreparable agony when getting in the car but he still has a funky tie on. despite the horrors his swag must persist.

GASP!! Mulder opens the car drawer and sees the cigarettes of famed ciggy man. alex is too pretty to smoke...

Mulder puts two and two together FAST and accuses alex of being a rat to skinner (which he’s right about!) he says he stands behind his accusation on the record and skinner tries to call alex up

(which was so funny to me because if he was a secret double agent- which he is- and mulder is accusing him of something adjacent to treason- what is a talk in skinner's office gonna do to solve the problem? again skinner is giving me high school principal energy. ur not gonna talk that one out babe but it's sweet you gave it a go xx)

mulder says that scully got too close to whatever the truth is when she had that little tracker thing and so they got her. i find myself agreeing with the guy who believes elvis faked his death. funny how he's often the level headed one

skinner, to my surprise, is taking this accusation of his agents being of the double variety quite well. he actually seems pretty reasonable about the whole thing, and like he truly believes there is some ulterior motives at play here.

but sympathy isn't enough for mulder: “What CAN you do” he asks Skinner, thrusting a finger in his face. “There’s only one thing I can do,” skinner sighs, and he... REOPENS THE X FILES?

(now this did shock me, but i was excited! don't get me wrong, i was just a bit surprised. i was thinking maybe he'd call up ciggy man and try to have a nice dignified chat since he seems so hell-bent on solving things through the power of discussion, but i suppose that reauthorizing the investigation into aliens while a top agent is missing for doing just that is. certainly an approach to the problem at hand?)

mulder walks sadly beneath a water fountain. it was sad enough as it was but then scully's mom walks up and things get even More sad

to somewhat break the air of tragedy: for some reason his face is crystal clear but hers is superrrrr blurry. like i've mentioned before, some shots are normal tv quality, and others look like they were ripped from a VHS. it throws me off each time.

but back to the matter at hand: he gives her scully’s cross necklace and he’s like "why did she wear that if she was such a skeptic" (which is a question i keep pointing out!!!!!!) and we learn the answer:

it was a gift from her mother on her 15th birthday. which i can and Will analyze in depth at a later date. the gift of a religious object to further solidify the need from her family to be Perfect and never fail and do exactly as they say. but scully choosing to wear it anyway, decades later, to hold her family close, no matter the pain of disappointing them. when she mindlessly reaches for the pendant to roll in her fingers, does she feel the warmth of family or the chill of their expectations she can never meet?

but. mulder tries to give her the necklace. and she says that he can give it to her when he finds her. not if. when.

he goes to a hill and looks up at the sky.

this episode was intense, and i will be gnawing on it like a bone for a while. seeing mulder and scully's mom together made me incredibly emo. seeing him break all the rules to find her also made me emo. trying to figure out if skinner is a real one and the ratio to which alex is genuinely evil vs just stupid were some serious cases of mental chess. and duane. we all wanna know what his deal is. and where is alex! he doesn't have to come back, don't get me wrong, but... did he fall off the face of the earth? go back to massachusetts for a dunkin run? i know that smug new englander look he has about him. don't sit here and tell me he grew up in kansas i won't buy it.

anyway, i saw the description of the next episode- so we're going back to an x file. i find it hard to imagine that mulder will have emerged from bloodhound mode by then, so maybe he thinks it's connected somehow and will go on a quest for answers in that direction- a vampire direction? hmm. guess i'll just have to tune back in!

[wulfhalls]

other anon is right djats show>>>>>>>>> the book. like riley and sam. that's it. period. cause the entire book is just billy lying and downplaying his relationship with daisy so you spend 90% of it thinking he's full of shit and having to read inbetween the lines of what really went down with him and daisy since most of their relationship is allegedly them barely speaking or interacting except on stage. camila also deified to an annoyingly unrealistic degree so thank god we have the show to be like "nah this is what actually happened. daisybilly kissing. daisybilly falling in love. daisybilly sneaking out for lunch dates. daisybilly crossword puzzle love confessions. daisybilly backstage hookups" as far am i'm concerned the show is what really happened and the book was just the story the band wanted to tell 😂

I feel like one of the big issues with book stans / Camila Stans is they read the book and thought that Billy choosing Camila meant that he loved her more when that was never the case. Billy chose stability because of his past. So when you see that on the show it looks like Camila got the raw end of the deal when that’s always what Camila represented they just finally understand that him picking Camila doesn’t mean he loves her more. I mean they spelt it out in the book.“Passion is...it's fire. And fire is great, man. But we're made of water. Water is how we keep living. Water is what we need to survive. My family was my water. I picked water.” I do think Billy convinced himself over time that he did choose to love Camila more but the fact remains that Camila was a choice. That’s what you get from him in the books and in the last episode with Julia but Daisy was never a choice. Daisy was someone he couldn’t help but be drawn to and feel something so deeply for that he risk ruining his hard fought stability for “How could I be around Daisy Jones and not be mesmerized by her? Not fall in love with her. I couldn't. I just couldn't.”

its absolutely wild how book purists are sooo mad about the daisy and camilla hotel scene being taken out of the book/reworked into a different type of conversation, but when I finally decided to go look it up for myself it didn't give me woman supporting woman feminist vibes like people claim. like its not woman destroying woman either it just feels neutral. cami really tells daisy "he will never leave me" and daisy only gets clean because camila is the one to tell her that she should. IDK MAN i think its more powerful in the show where its daisy being self aware enough to tell cami "he will always choose you!" and for daisy to be the one to realize she needs to get clean because this life is really bad for her. not because, 'camila dunne thinks I'm worth saving' LIKE HELLO?? the book seems like it makes cami out to be this perfect angel woman. WHERE'S HER FEMININE RAGE!! HER MAN IS DEEP IN LOVE WITH SOME OTHER WOMAN AND CANT EVEN ADMIT!! i think she deserved to be mad as hell instead of whatever saintlike behavior she exhibits in the book. sorry I just needed someone to listen to my rant about the scene that so many people keep calling Emotional and Powerful when really cami deserved to be mad as hell and daisy deserved to be an active participant in her own life.

It's kinda crazy to me that Camila is the one in the book that basically tells Daisy to leave and quit the band to go to rehab. They don't even interact that much prior to this, and I always hated that part in the book. On 1 hand we know daisy is leaving a toxic situation, but we don't get the feeling that she'll be OK. If anything we feel that she's alone, and because( and this is how it felt to me ) that the band chose Cami over her. Cami is described like this virgin mary can do no wrong character, and her alienating daisy from the band just felt nasty( especially considering the band never had Camis back ). I love that in the show they gave Daisy that power, along with the fact that both Teddy and Simone are still clearly there for her and supportive of her choice( also showing Warren there for her too later on ) Like I don't understand why people wanted them to be friends so bad 😫 it's weird for the wife and the mistress to be friends, especially given how Daisily were in the show...

The ending didn’t work in the books either imo. In the books Camila tells Daisy I know he loves you but he’s never going to leave me. Like girllll you know your man is in love with another woman snd you just okay with that? She was entirely too accepting at least in the show she’s wasn’t okay with and was rightfully hurt & angry but then again Camila as a character was kinda bleh. Every time Billy talked about her I just rolled my eyes because he was overcompensating so hard.

I think the funniest antis are the ones that are clearly Camila Stans that claim DaisyBilly were “ruined” by the show bc they made out. That them having more physicality in their relationship some how changed the nuance. Like you can have a twin flame relationship and also be very attracted to each other. One does not take away from the other. And it’s frankly unbelievable that anyone believes that Daisy & Billy had a connection like they had and NEVER gave in not for one single second. Like please

When I tell you the show ending is so much better. And it’s not even the ending exactly it’s how they get to that ending that’s soooo much better. In the books they handed all of Billy & Daisy’s agency to Camila. In the show it felt like they all had agency and it was sooo much better.

all of u having the most book thoughts compilation

[ka-writes]

——————

Notes: haha I did a semi short chapter... sorry... also this is chapter 4 of my space AU..

ALSO READ THE DAMN WARNINGS. Thank you ☺️

——————

Incase you missed:

Chapter 1:

Chapter 2:

Chapter 3:

——————

Inspired by:

Humans are Space Velociraptors

By:FreshRoses_InMyGarden_NeedTheRain

Some kids come from storks, others come from crashed spaceships

By: mmmajora

Home Again, Home Again

By: teeth_eater

All works can be found on Ao3

——————

Warning: Mentions of abuse (physical verbal and sexual) there aren’t any graphic recalls it is simply mentions. Mentions of being beaten up. Mentions of knives and blood. Threatening characters, and character pain. Again characters being trapped and not going home. Cussing. Characters passing out. Characters being distressed characters being malnourished. Yea I kinda was in an angsty mode sooo.... here you go..

——————

Ao3 link:

——————

“Humans are [Add text here]”

Chapter 4: I guess it qualifies as an introduction?

Phil wasn’t expecting to wake up at 4 in the morning to the sound of laughter.

It wouldn’t be the first time, definitely not the last.

Curiously the avian poked his head into his kids’ room. The laughter wasn’t coming from the gardener, guard, or scientist. The laughter was coming from the assistant who wasn’t in their room. Phil turned his attention down the hall. Sure enough the laughter was louder. Quietly he made his way to the holding cell. Phil sat in a smaller hallway and decided to listen into the conversation… What can he say? He always eavesdropped..

“What even is a you-tube?” The assistant asked through small giggles. To that the human gasped as if he was hurt by the statement.

“You don’t have YouTube?! Or like an alien version of it?!” The human replied, not even trying to hide his shock.

“Erm no?”

“Well it’s like this thing that humans use to make really cool videos and stuff.”

“What’s a video?” Ranboo interrupted.

“They’re kinda like moving photos that usually work as a sort of entertainment or info dump. I could probably tell you thousands of the times my stupid teacher made me watch ‘educational’ videos..”

“So they’re kinda like illusions?”

“Yea but you don’t see 'em in 3D. As I was saying, before I was rudely interrupted..” The enderian let out a small squeak of embarrassment at that, “YouTube is like a thing people use to post videos on. I am totally making an alien version of YouTube when I get out.” The air stiffened at that.

“Tommy.. you probably won’t get out for a while…” Ranboo said, Phil heard one of them shift and the entire atmosphere lost it’s warmth, “It’s not like you won’t get out! It’s just hard… especially when no one really trusts you yet.” Ranboo swallowed, as he usually does when he is uncomfortable, “Even when we let you out of the holding cell.. you probably won’t be allowed off the ship. It’s too dangerous for all of us..” the two fell into a deafening silence. Phil shivered at the tension, making sure to be silent while doing so.

“I assumed as much…” the human started, being the first to break the silence, “I-I… I guess I won’t be going home either… since the ISF absolutely hates us.. plus like you said, only already crazy humans are sent back..” the human sighed sadly.. For the first time Phil felt sympathetic towards a human. With that he decided it was time to start on breakfast.

——————

Three things happened after Tubbo woke up.

One, Ranboo passed out at the table. Phil simply shook his head and picked up the enderian with some unknown strength to the rest of the crew.

Two, a scream was heard from the other side of the ship, causing Wilbur to frantically run to the holding cell.

Three, Techno put his milk in before he poured his tea… I mean who does that?

Ignoring the last strange thing, Tubbo went to check on Ranboo. He was fine, so Phil said. “He only needs rest. Leave them be.” Was what Tubbo got as he peered into the enderian’s room. Shrugging off the weird behavior Tubbo made his way to the garden.

Before he made his way to the garden he noticed the human wasn’t in the holding cell. That meant he was probably in the lab… Which meant Tubbo would have to meet him.. Oh prime no. That’s not gonna happen.

He started sprinting to the garden. It was just passed the lab if only he took another step-

“Tubbo, I need your help.” Wilbur said from behind him. The droneling turned around reluctantly. Holding his breath he made his way into the medical part of the lab.

[gore and distressed characters, skim if you need to]

There, laying on the bed, was a human. He held back a scream which came out as a labored gasp. Sweat was bubbling on his forehead. With that he turned to Wilbur who examined the human from a distance.

“Go get some bandages and the stitching kit.” Wilbur commanded. Without hesitation Tubbo ran to grab the items. Wilbur took both objects and disinfected a bad cut on the human’s arm. He hadn’t even realized there was a cut until Wilbur cleared off the strange red blood. Wilbur then proceeds to stitch the wound and bandage the irritated wound.

That’s when Tubbo noticed the amount of blood the human lost. Most species wouldn’t be able to handle that much blood loss, but here was the beast of the galaxy, completely fine in a matter of minutes after losing quite a bit of blood.

[End]

When Wilbur was satisfied, he picked the human up and carried him back to the holding cell. Tubbo was unable to stop himself from following. Before thinking the droneling sat at the table and watched as Wilbur finished cleaning the human.

“Er.. do you want me to grab Techno so you can stay in here?” Wilbur asked, noticing Tubbo sitting in the corner.

Without saying a word Tubbo gave a small nod. Wil didn’t push like he usually did and left to get Techno.

Tubbo got up and approached the sleeping human. He was skinnier than what Tubbo thought humans should be. There were odd dark circles under his eyes and his hair clearly hadn’t had a good wash for what looked like months. He had injuries over his body and was practically shaking in his sleep.

Since Tubbo was preoccupied, he barely noticed Techno enter, or the door closing. Let alone the clangs and thuds from other crew mates.

He was preoccupied by the strange human who was sleeping in front of him.

The human stirred and the droneling stumbled away.

After a few seconds the human sat up and looked at the now fallen droneling.

“What the fuck?”

——————

Tommy didn’t expect another alien to push their luck in his space. But here he was.

The alien was smaller than Tommy by a lot. Further proving Tommy was the biggest man. Unlike the other aliens this one wasn’t threatening upon first glance.

The one from last night had been way more intimidating at first. Being way taller than Tommy and having weird lanky limbs and magical purple glowing orbs surrounding them. They had horns and a half and half complexion. One half of the alien being white with grey and purple freckles along with a red eye. The other half being a purplish black with grey and green freckles along with a green eye. They wore a suit with a red tie and dress shoes. He also had two tails of the same colors as his complexion. All of this being forgotten after they stammered through their introduction. It was honestly hilarious.

This alien was very different from the others. They had brown messy hair, encasing black antennas and small black bumps that resembled horns. Their skin was a honey peach color and practically glistened. There were strange hexagon patterns over their face along with three black stripes on either side of their face. They had bee wings, which was the only thing Tommy could relate to the alien too. There was also a black fuzzy tail, similar to a stinger, poking out of their pants. Their hands were lanky and pointed, completely black. There was also soft yellow fuzz poking out of their sleeves and holes in their pants. They wore ripped jeans along with a long sleeved green button down shirt. Their eyes were another thing entirely, being a honey brown in certain light but could also shift to a greenish blue in other light. They had fly-like pupils.

After a minute of them sitting in an awkward stance the alien got up. Using their wings to properly position them in a standing position. They brushed themselves off and approached Tommy.

“You lay a finger on anyone here and I will kill you. Understand?” The alien said, any intimidation that was lost from the alien falling was regained in an instant. The alien poked him in the chest with one of the lanky fingers, which started burning like acid after a minute.

Since Tommy was too, sacred, poggers to move he simply nodded, which is absolutely the best response to the situation. Sadly the alien didn’t get the gesture and dug their nail into his chest even more. Seriously, it was starting to really burn.

“Y-yes.” Was all Tommy could muster. The alien was satisfied with the answer and let go of Tommy. They walked out of the now open door. Shortly after Techno followed the door closing behind him. Tommy never realized the other alien was in the room.

[Mentions of abuse]

For a split second the interaction reminded him of his dad.

The way his dad did the same thing to his mom when she didn’t listen.

Or when his sister didn’t follow his dad’s friend.

Or when Tommy made a mistake.

Except instead of a nail, it was glass, or a punch, or sometimes a knife…

[End]

He shook off the thoughts and reminded himself that the aliens weren’t his father, nor were they going to do that to him.

They wouldn’t do that right?.. Right?

Tommy slapped his face, only to find there were silent tears flowing down his cheeks. He quickly wiped his cheeks and continued his train of thought.

Tommy trusted too easily. That in the end is how at nine he ended up getting beat up in his first foster home. He condemned himself for trusting the aliens. They were strangers. He knew nothing of them and they knew more about him. This was the moment in which Tommy shut himself off. Where he regained the ability to leave his blind trusting instincts.

——————

Chapter 4- End

Words: 1633

——————

Notes: I didn’t know what to add next so I decided to leave you here. Your welcome! <3

Again hope you enjoyed! Now go eat food, drink water, take a shower if you haven’t, and go to sleep. Stay safe, love ya! <3

——————

Tubbo: *falls out of fear

Tommy: ._. This dude ain’t intimidating

Tubbo: *threatens Tommy

Tommy: ,:^ never mind then...

——————

Reminder likes are appreciated but reblogs are better!!

——————

[anastasiabeaverhousen87]

Make Wise Choices:  Part 7 Cuore  Mio

The next couple of days were rough on you, filled with cold meds, soups, lots of chamomile tea  and water and you felt like your teeth were about to swim out of your mouth, but according to Alex you needed to be hydrated and tea was good for colds.

A few days after Alex had to go back to the DEO, she was needed but Kara was able to stay with you as Supergirl wasn’t required to be there, not at the moment anyways. So that’s how you found yourself at Thursday afternoon Infront of the TV with Kara next to you in the couch watching some musical. Well, Kara was watching the musical, you were engrossed on your cellphone texting away with a very goofy smile on your face.

Kara: “Is that the hot doctor your texting…again?” –

Y/N: “well, if you really must know. Yes, I’m texting Cassie”

Kara: “Cassie huh? So now you’re on nickname bases I see”

y/n: “I heard Lena called her that and I liked it, also I think Cassandra is a beautiful name, but a mouthful. And calling her hot doctor sounded a bit rude, at least for the time being”- you give a naughty smile.

Kara laughs at that and mutes the tv “You really like her, don’t you?”

y/n: “I do, I mean I feel things when I speak with her and when I’m near her. And Oh my God she is sooo beautiful. You’re not mad, aren’t you?”

Kara: “Sweet girl I could never be mad about you liking someone. Besides she really is hot. But honestly it would be kind of hypocrite from me to not approve you liking her. She is also someone very dear to Lena so that makes her even more special. So no, I’m not mad, I’m actually happy for you, you never really showed any interested in anyone like you seem to be with her. Just be careful and don’t feel pressured into something you don’t really want”

y/n: “I know, I mean I’ve dated but there was no spark, nothing there. I did fool around a little but never really liked someone to go all the way. If you know what I mean?” – you blush pink at this.

Kara: “I figured as much. You’re a lot like Alex in that aspect, you concentrate too much in your grades and other things, work. But you never really sounded super doped on anyone you dated, when mom and Alex gave you the sex talk you were almost sick thinking about it, that was funny to watch” – You throw a pillow at your sister face “Hey!!!, don’t attack me little bean. And then when you asked about sex with women you sounded more interested but still, I can tell you weren’t ready. The question is, do you feel like you are ready now?”

y/n: “I feel like I am. Truly I’ve only known her for a little while, and I know is soon. But I really like getting to know her and to spend time with her. She is amazing and so caring. I can feel getting serious with her you know. Like I can trust her, and I can share that level of intimacy. It’s weird because is so soon, but I just know it feel right. Do you think is too soon?”

Kara: “If you feel like you can open up to her, if she makes you feel safe enough, why not? you are very good at judging people’s character and I trust your judgement. I’m not gonna lie though, Cassandra being Lena’s friend and all I’ve heard from her she does sounds like a great person and I know Lena also doesn’t trust easily. So yes, that a great bonus and makes me feel more comfortable of you dating her. But I do trust you baby, you’ll know when you feel ready and what to share with her. Also, I know you won’t be able to hide who I am from her that much longer if things do get serious. When you feel ready to tell her I will support you, okay? Oh and if she ever treats you wrong I will throw her into the sun”. - she winks at you.

y/n: “Thank you Kara, that means a lot to me” – you hug your sister and you kiss her cheek while your cellphone sounds with an incoming text, you look down at your phone- “She wants to come over…” you give a small smile

Kara: “well, tell her yes. Go change into something more appropriate at least nicer pajamas. and if she does happen to make you diner again, I wouldn’t be opposed to her amazing pasta. Man, I’m so jealous of you, she cooks like a pro and if I wasn’t dating Lena or you being my sister I would totally charm my way to her, her cooking skills are so amazing. Now don’t get jealous little bean, I’m good with her being my sister in law, she still needs to get point and be on my good side. Just tell her food is the way to my heart” – you sister laughs while walking to the kitchen. “Go get change and tell your girlfriend to come over”

y/n: “You and your stomach. Crazy alien food crazed woman. And sister-in law, seriously? Let me date her first, jeez!” – you mumble while walking into your room.

You hear someone at the door, and you know is the blonde doctor, and you don’t even try to rush to the living room well aware that your bubbly sister will open the door and let her come in.

Kara: “Hello Cassandra, come on in please, y/n will be here in a moment. Y/N!!! you hot date is here!”

Dr. Sharpe: “You’ve been waiting a while to do that don’t you?” – the doctor greets the other blonde and kisses her cheeks hello.

Kara: “You have nooo idea for how long. She used to say things like that or worse when I first began to date Lena, even at the very beginning of our friendship. I’ve been waiting patiently for the time for payback! Ha…” Kara rubs her hands like a Disney villain but she honestly looks quite like the adorable golden retriever she really is.

y/n: ““Really Kara? You couldn’t wait a little longer?”- you shake your head amused and then walk to where the blonde doctor is standing, and she quickly kisses your cheeks and gives you a warm hug.

Dr. Sharpe: “Ciao Bella ragazza”-  

You blush at the words spoken by the blonde doctor

Y/n: “hello to you too gorgeous”

Kara: “Oh you guys are so cute, I can’t even…”- Your sister speaks and walks into the living room

  The three women spend the afternoon talking and the doctor even offered to make diner, much to your sister delight and happy squeal. Lena was on her way over and you got to know more of the blue- eyed doctor and you could see why Lena loves and admires Cassandra so much. She is an amazing kind and dedicated woman. You learnt that not only did the good doctor was a certificated periodontist, she had received a Master’s Degree in Oral Biology  and while in graduate school she also received the Balint Orban Award, which apparently is the highest level of certification in the field of periodontist. And that the reason Lena and the blonde woman couldn’t see each other so often was because Cassandra gives lectures all over the world on a wide range of topics including dental implants, gum grafting, cosmetic periodontal surgery, and bone regeneration. She is also the founder and program director of a dental study club whose purpose is to positively impact the quality of dental care by hosting the highest quality international speakers in the field of dentistry to speak to local dentists in different cities in the US. And in addition to that she also made multiple mission trips to countries in Latin America like Mexico, Guatemala, Venezuela among others where she has been able to utilize her skills to help the neediest of people.

To say you were amazed by the woman was an understatement, she was funny, beautiful and crazy smart. But behind all those accomplishments you could see a sadness withing her. And you felt the need to change that, to make her smile and a pull to her that you couldn’t quite understand. But you were pulled out from your thoughts when Lena spoke.

 Lena: “Sorry to cut my time short but I just got a text and I’m needed for a consult” – Lena discreetly elbowing Kara to see the text on her phone. Both her and Supergirl were needed at the DEO, so they needed to leave.

Kara: “Oh shoot, ok well let me drive you then”

And of course you couldn’t be cool about it and spoke before you could understand why they needed to leave “Kara you don’t even own a car and Lena has her own driver”- you look at your sister like she just said the stupidest thing ever. Until you recognize their looks and realized they both were needed for something important, DEO important. You curse yourself.

y/n: “Buuuut I mean I totally get it, you should go with her, you haven’t been able to spend time just the two of you because you’re been busy taking care of me. Soooo why don’t you guys leave. I´ll be okay on my own. “

Kara: “Yeah I don’t think so little one, you always forget to take your meds and…”

Lena: “If you don’t mind Cassie, can you stay for a little while with y/n ?” – Lena interrupts her girlfriend ramblings.

y/n: “Hey Lena, I thought you were on my side. I can totally take care of myself” – you pout at her

Dr. Sharpe: “I can stay, I don’t mind at all. I like spending time with you y/n”

y/n: “Yeah me too, I just find itoffensive my sister and Lena don’t think I could spend a few hours on my own. But sure stay we can watch a movie or something”

Kara: “Ha, yeah. Like last night you were so tired you fell asleep on the bathtub and knocked the shampoo inside the water and you made a huge mess with shampoo foam or you know when trying to make a chocolate shake with the blender and forgot to remove the metal spoon and you almost cut you hand when the blender broke to pieces, yeah totally you can handle yourself. Klutz!”

You gasp and look offended: “How dare you!!! Says the woman that burnt the brownies and set the microwave and toaster on fire !!! - you just childishly stuck your tongue out and pouted: “Well you make it sound like I’m the worse, thank you Kara”

Lena and the blonde doctor laugh at the antics and pouting face you make at your sister.

Lena: “I knew it was you the responsible for the toaster, Kara. That one was new”

Kara: “No, you are not the worse, but when you feel tire or sick you tend to make messes and I don’t want you alone, you haven’t completely got rid of your cold and you still under some strong meds. We just worry, you know we love you so much. And honey it was an accident I did got a new one though”

y/n: “Fine leave us now, bring back home some chocolate if you can pleaseeeee?”

Kara: “Totally my little klutz” -your sister engulfs you in a big hug and gives you a kiss to your head.  “let’s go Lena and…” – looking back at you and the blonde doctor “behave yourselves and don’t do anything I wouldn’t” – You hug ger back just as strong and let go of her.

Lena: “Come on sweetheart and leave them be”- Just rolls her eyes and walks away with the blonde superhero next to her. The door closes.

You just exhale and keep looking at the door and then your turn around to face the blonde doctor.  You are both now sitting at the couch and the blue-eyed woman is looking at you with a sweet and soft smile.

You scrunch up your nose adorably: “What?”

Dr. Sharpe: “Nothing, I just like the way you are with your sisters. You care very much and they as well. That’s nice, it reminds me of the way I used to be with my nonna and my brother” – the blonde woman face goes from fond to a little sad.

y/n: “are they in Italy?”

Her face is just so sad, and you can see a hint of tears in her eyes, and it makes your heart aches.

Dr. Sharpe: “No, they died” -you try to apologize but the blonde doctor sees that and stops you “Don’t, you didn’t know, you couldn’t. and it was a very long time ago. My nonna basically rise me and my brother. She died when I was 25 and my brother, he was my best friend. He …he uhm he was a Navy SEAL, he died in a terrorism-related mission three years ago.” – the blonde doctor just stares down at her hands trying to gain control over her emotions.

You just wanted to make her stop hurting so you did the only thing you knew you were an expert at. Hugging and cuddling people. So, you just hug her firm and strong you cling to her and try to convey through physical connection instead of words, that you are sorry, and you want to make the pain go away or at least lessen the burnt. You stay like that hugging each other and basking in the feel of each other arms.

Dr. Sharpe: “Okay, well you truly are an amazing hugger sweetheart, thank you”- the blonde woman kisses your cheek and near your mouth but not quite there. So, you take things into your own hands and sit up, throw a leg over the blonde doctor waist so you can straddle her. You put your arms around her neck and stare directly into those beautiful eyes, you really love those eyes. They are mesmerizing.

y/n: “God I really love your eyes, is like seeing the color of the sky when there’s a summer storm”.

the blonde doctor was completely still, mouth barely open and a little smirk on the corner of her mouth as she looks up to you amused loving eyes.

You took the opportunity to movie in and crush your lips against the blonde woman, who was more than happy to reciprocate. You initiated the kiss trying to control the kiss, hungrily kissing her lips, however the honey blonde had other plans, she bit down ever so slightly your bottom lip but soon you were surprised by strong arms shifting. The blonde grab ahold of your ass  and stood up with you in her arms and holding you tight against her waist  and twisted her body so you hold on just as tight and you felt yourself being lowered on the couch. The blonde had a hand behind you head, holding you were laid down flat on your back and she was hovering above you and broke the kiss but kept looking directly into your eyes.

You were just as turn on as the blonde doctor, she was looking down at you with such hunger in her eyes, and she was panting.

Dr. Sharpe: “Calm down little one” – the blonde woman lowered her face next to your ear and kissed the side of your neck – “if you keep pushing me, I won’t be able to stop”

y/n: “Well I don’t want you stop” – you tried to gain some sort of friction from the tight nestles between your legs.

Dr. Sharpe: “no?”- the blonde doctor keeps kissing your neck and jaw and you shiver in delight. You never felt this aroused by someone before. But the blonde just kissed you sweetly, you tried to hug her to bring her down on you, but the blonde kept it sweet and gentle, not really letting you get any traction in the kiss. Like an innocent sweet kiss.

You felt yourself being sat up by strong and gentle arms. She pulled you into her your legs intertwined, and she positioned you to lay on her your head being cradled in the crook of her neck and you felt another kiss this time to your temple. The blonde woman kept making soothing circles on your back with her free hand, rubbing your arm and face. You wrapped yourself even further into her.

You love cuddles and hugs, you did it all the time with your sisters and some friend, specially Lena. But this felt so different, probably the most intimate thing you ever done with anyone. You didn’t put up any fight, you felt so cozy and happy in her arms.

Dr. Sharpe: “shh cuore mio, I know you want this. But I want to take you on a proper date first I want to do this the right way, you deserve better and not rushing it in the heat of the moment” – she spoke so softly to you, that you just melted.

You kept basking in the tender touches and soft skin- “ I like it when you call me Italian pet names”

The blonde woman just smiled and kept the soothing touches.  You nuzzled you face into her neck finding that smell that was just hers, Cassandra’s and her warmth. You felt completely at peace and you felt yourself falling asleep in the most comfortable embrace. The blonde doctor kept looking at you and touching softly your back and arms, until herself felt the pull of sleep and the both were completely asleep in each other’s arms.

  Note: Well this happened, I hope you like it. 

Until next time...

[fanficshiddles]

Alluring whispers, Chapter 9

Hope was absolutely furious that the team had made her go with them on that mission.

It had been hell, pure and utter hell.

There was a massive fight going on against an alien race in London. So many casualties that Hope tried to rescue. Granted, she was able to heal many people, but there were so many that she couldn’t save.

The smell of death was ingrained in her nostrils, along with a lot of dust from rubble. The sound of people screaming in fear and agony was still ringing in her mind. And the sight of so many people dying right on front of her would never leave her mind, she was sure of it.

She had never been on a mission like that before. It had been horrendous. And she was struggling to come to terms with the fact that she couldn’t save everyone. It was eating her up inside.

The team knew how hard it was on her when there were times like that, where she couldn’t help everyone. Yet they knew that would be the situation because of how big the threat was, and had been told about lots of casualties before heading there. But they still dragged her along anyway.

She was absolutely exhausted, physically and mentally when they returned home to base. She ignored the team around her as they got off the jet. She was angry with them for doing that to her, knowing how much suffering it would cause her. They claimed, originally, they were taking her because they would need her as back up for the team. But they really just wanted her along so they could keep an eye on her.

Hope wasn’t stupid. She knew they were getting wary of her, because of Loki’s visits. They hadn’t wanted her to stay at the base alone, no doubt worried he would come and whisk her away somewhere.

But after Loki telling her that they were over using her powers… She was really starting to wonder if the team wanted her around for her or because of what she could do. More and more she was realising that they did seem to just assume she would heal people, that she was there and would help. The team always thanked her, but the SHIELD agents? not so much.

And they didn’t respect her when she asked to be left alone for some rest time. Often Bruce or Clint would come knocking to say they needed her to heal someone else. Even if it turned out just to be a sprained ankle that could easily wait a few hours. So she had been secretly glad that time Loki put a spell around her room, letting her rest.

But at the same time, she was trying to focus on the fact that Loki was a good manipulator. He was trying to get into her head, perhaps even turn her on the team. It wasn’t easy though, because he was an Alpha. And every fibre of her being wanted to be with him, to be around him. To submit and do whatever he told her to do.

It was getting more and more difficult each time she saw him.

Hope dragged her sorry ass back to her bedroom. She was almost there when Natasha caught up with her. ‘Wait, Hope!’

Hope gritted her teeth and froze on the spot.

‘There are some agents that need your’ She was cut off when Hope turned around.

Hope looked awful. It was obvious she was exhausted. Tears were streaming down her cheeks, thinking of the people she couldn’t save. It had really hurt her, being there on that mission. But what surprised Natasha most, was that Hope snapped.

‘I am NOT healing anyone right now. They can put bandages on their cuts and bruises. Only disturb me if it’s a matter of life or death.’ She snarled at Natasha, having finally had enough for once.

Natasha realised at that point that they had went too far taking her on that mission. When they knew full well how bad it was going to be… She nodded sheepishly and left Hope to go into her room.

When Hope entered her room, she burst into tears. Unable to control her emotions any longer. She slid down the door, head cradled in her hands. She had this tight feeling in her chest that made her panic, flashbacks of all the people calling for help filled her mind uncontrollably.

‘Hope?’ The soft voice pulled her from her thoughts. Her head shot up and her eyes widened upon seeing Loki, looking very concerned over the young omega.

‘L… Loki.’ She squeaked, wiping her eyes.

Her entire body was shaking, she was scared after seeing what she did. She managed to get up to her feet, already feeling vulnerable with Loki here never mind with her being on the ground.

Loki hated seeing her so scared and upset, clearly very shaken after what had happened. He took a step closer to her and opened his arms, inviting her in.

She hesitated a little. The invitation into him was sooo inviting. Especially with how she was feeling currently. The thought of an Alpha making her feel safe and secure… It was too much for her to resist.

As soon as Hope took the first step, it was like a chain reaction. She rushed forward into Loki’s awaiting embrace. As soon as she was in his reach, he wrapped his arms around her securely and placed his chin on top of her head.

‘Shhh, shhh. You’re safe with me, my darling omega.’ He purred, rubbing her back as he squeezed her tightly.

Hope took in deep breaths between her crying, the smell of him along with the leather and metal made her feel so at home. Her crying slowly ceased and her shaking eased off too, especially when he crooned deep within his chest for her.

It was in that moment that Hope realised she was fucked. In both senses of the word… No doubt eventually, anyway.

Hope didn’t ever want to let go of Loki. She had never felt so secure and safe before. Her hormones were running wild and her body was taking over her mind entirely. The fact she was in the arms of a villain completely flew out the window.

‘I… I need to shower. I can smell it all… on me.’ She whispered, her voice shaky.

‘I will bathe you, pet. You’re in no fit state to be alone.’ Loki said softly, firmly. Leaving no room for arguments, and she didn’t argue.

She was giving herself to him completely, trusting him to look after her. Right now, she was completely his.

Loki took her to the bathroom, keeping an arm around her. He was worried if he stopped contact that she would snap out of it and try to push him away, she could be very stubborn sometimes. So he did his best to make sure that wouldn’t happen. Part of him felt selfish, using her vulnerability to get closer to her. But part of him also wanted and needed to be there to comfort and protect her. It was in his instincts after all.

While the bath was filling up, with plenty of bubble bath added, he started to remove her clothing slowly and carefully. She blushed when he took off her bra, then even more so when he crouched down to peel her knickers down her legs.

As he stood up, he trailed the tips of his fingers right up her legs, up her sides and up her arms to her shoulders. Goosebumps broke out all over her skin under his touch. Her eyes were closed until he pressed a kiss to her forehead, making her eyes shoot open in surprise at how gentle he was being with her.

‘Come on, let’s get you in the bath.’ He turned the taps off and tested the water before holding her hand and helping her into the tub.

As soon as Hope sank down into the water, she felt all her muscles starting to relax.

Loki kneeled down at the side of the bath and smiled fondly at her, watching as the water lapped at her skin. He dipped his fingers in the water and swirled them around, slowly moving towards her knee that was just poking out of the water.

‘Feeling better?’ He asked with a hum as he touched her knee softly, making her gasp slightly.

‘Much better… thank you.’ She nodded.

‘I don’t think your friends would be best pleased to find me bathing you.’ He grinned.

‘I don’t care.’ She blurted out honestly, making Loki raise an eyebrow at her admission.

Loki didn’t answer her. He trailed his fingers up her thigh, under the water, and he skimmed across to her abdomen. He lightly tickled her, making her squirm and giggle. A big grin formed on his face.

‘Ticklish, are we?’ He teased, tickling back and fore across her abdomen then up her side, across her ribs, making her wriggle around and laugh even more.

Loki paused his hand on her side after a while, his thumb was just touching the side of her breast. And she was very hyper aware of it. Her heart felt like it was going to burst out of her chest.

‘Sit up, pet. I’ll wash your hair for you.’ Loki removed his hand from her and he moved up to the top of the bath while she sat up.

Hope was surprised with how gentle Loki was while he massaged the shampoo and conditioner into her hair. Her eyes started fluttering closed under his touch. Having him so close, she was still able to smell him. Keeping her nice and calm.

‘Right, head back to rinse.’ Loki pressed firmly on her chest while cradling the back of her head and he eased her down into the water to rinse her hair.

‘Good girl.’ He purred, gliding his fingers through her hair again to get the last of the shampoo out.

Loki helped her out of the tub and wrapped a large towel around her. He then surprised her by scooping her up in his arms and carrying her out of the bathroom and to her bed. He got himself comfy on it with his back to the headboard, Hope was kept snugly on his lap.

She didn’t bother arguing or trying to get away, she didn’t really have the energy. And she was enjoying his company this time, perhaps a bit too much. But Loki’s lap was also extremely comfortable, she didn’t want to ever leave.

Loki smiled when she turned into him and buried her face in the crook of his neck, sighing in contentment. She was so small in comparison to him, but that only made him want to protect and have her even more.

Hope enjoyed how large he was, he truly did make her feel safe and secure. There was also the odd excitement she felt with the fact that he was still fully clothed in his Asgardian armour while she was naked, only protected by a towel. All proper and sensible thoughts went flying out the window. She even thought about what it would be like if he was to scent and mark her…

She couldn’t deny there was something rather titillating about this incredibly intimidating, dangerous, strong, dominant, Alpha man that could be so soft and caring towards her. That she was seeing this side of him, and the thought that he could also be hers as much as she could be his…

‘Are you feeling better, my little omega?’ Loki asked, his hand sliding up and down her back. His question pulled her from her hazardous thoughts.

Feeling rather shy and vulnerable, she nodded but kept her face hidden against him. It was also a good excuse to in-hale as much of his smell as possible.

Loki pulled the towel down enough so that it fell over her breasts, baring her shoulders and neck. He leaned in and started nuzzling at her neck, the tip of his nose trailed up and down slowly. God, her smell was so intoxicating. He almost lost it, wanting to flip her over and take her right there and then.

But he managed to refrain… just. The thought of scenting her, marking her as his became overwhelming.

He flicked his tongue out along her neck and was urged on by the small whimper that came from the little omega on his lap. He lavished her neck with his tongue, suckling too when he found all the right places.

Hope tilted her head to the side, to make sure he had all the access he needed. The way his tongue and lips were moving across her skin had her trembling like crazy. Her body and pheromones went into complete overdrive. She felt like she was drunk on him.

‘Bite me… mark me, please.’ She whined, her hand clutching at the leather and metal on his chest.

Her want and need surprised him, making him pause momentarily. But he grinned against her skin and chuckled. He could sense and feel her desperation for him.

‘It would be my pleasure.’ He growled and sucked hard on her neck, then he sank his teeth into her and marked her with a deep, feral growl. Ashamedly, he came in his boxers as soon as his teeth got into her skin.

Finally, she was his.

He wasn’t the only one to lose control, Hope felt a small pulsating sensation shoot through her entire body, then focusing down between her thighs. Her clit was throbbing. But as Loki suckled on her, lapping up some blood that he caused, she couldn’t fight the overwhelming tiredness that washed over her when Loki stopped mauling her neck.

She closed her eyes with a moan, a smile on her face too, and she fell asleep on her Alphas lap.

[imagine-loki]

Alluring whispers, Chapter 9

TITLE: Alluring whispers CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 9 AUTHOR: fanficshiddles ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine Loki has the tesseract again and is captured by The Avengers. Where he discovers they have an omega who has healing powers living with them. He’s an Alpha and he wants her,badly. She is the epitome of all things good, and trying her best to avoid his seductive advances. But it’s not easy due to their instincts and biology. The Avengers do their best to keep the omega safe, but Loki is on the hunt and is hungry for her. RATING: M

Hope was absolutely furious that the team had made her go with them on that mission.

It had been hell, pure and utter hell.

There was a massive fight going on against an alien race in London. So many casualties that Hope tried to rescue. Granted, she was able to heal many people, but there were so many that she couldn’t save.

The smell of death was ingrained in her nostrils, along with a lot of dust from rubble. The sound of people screaming in fear and agony was still ringing in her mind. And the sight of so many people dying right in front of her would never leave her mind, she was sure of it.

She had never been on a mission like that before. It had been horrendous. And she was struggling to come to terms with the fact that she couldn’t save everyone. It was eating her up inside.

The team knew how hard it was on her when there were times like that, where she couldn’t help everyone. Yet they knew that would be the situation because of how big the threat was, and had been told about lots of casualties before heading there. But they still dragged her along anyway.

She was absolutely exhausted, physically and mentally when they returned home to base. She ignored the team around her as they got off the jet. She was angry with them for doing that to her, knowing how much suffering it would cause her. They claimed, originally, they were taking her because they would need her as back up for the team. But they really just wanted her along so they could keep an eye on her.

Hope wasn’t stupid. She knew they were getting wary of her, because of Loki’s visits. They hadn’t wanted her to stay at the base alone, no doubt worried he would come and whisk her away somewhere.

But after Loki telling her that they were over using her powers… She was really starting to wonder if the team wanted her around for her or because of what she could do. More and more she was realising that they did seem to just assume she would heal people, that she was there and would help. The team always thanked her, but the SHIELD agents? not so much.

And they didn’t respect her when she asked to be left alone for some rest time. Often Bruce or Clint would come knocking to say they needed her to heal someone else. Even if it turned out just to be a sprained ankle that could easily wait a few hours. So she had been secretly glad that time Loki put a spell around her room, letting her rest.

But at the same time, she was trying to focus on the fact that Loki was a good manipulator. He was trying to get into her head, perhaps even turn her on the team. It wasn’t easy though, because he was an Alpha. And every fibre of her being wanted to be with him, to be around him. To submit and do whatever he told her to do.

It was getting more and more difficult each time she saw him.

Hope dragged her sorry ass back to her bedroom. She was almost there when Natasha caught up with her. ‘Wait, Hope!’

Hope gritted her teeth and froze on the spot.

‘There are some agents that need your’ She was cut off when Hope turned around.

Hope looked awful. It was obvious she was exhausted. Tears were streaming down her cheeks, thinking of the people she couldn’t save. It had really hurt her, being there on that mission. But what surprised Natasha most, was that Hope snapped.

‘I am NOT healing anyone right now. They can put bandages on their cuts and bruises. Only disturb me if it’s a matter of life or death.’ She snarled at Natasha, having finally had enough for once.

Natasha realised at that point that they had went too far taking her on that mission. When they knew full well how bad it was going to be… She nodded sheepishly and left Hope to go into her room.

When Hope entered her room, she burst into tears. Unable to control her emotions any longer. She slid down the door, head cradled in her hands. She had this tight feeling in her chest that made her panic, flashbacks of all the people calling for help filled her mind uncontrollably.

‘Hope?’ The soft voice pulled her from her thoughts. Her head shot up and her eyes widened upon seeing Loki, looking very concerned over the young omega.

‘L… Loki.’ She squeaked, wiping her eyes.

Her entire body was shaking, she was scared after seeing what she did. She managed to get up to her feet, already feeling vulnerable with Loki here never mind with her being on the ground.

Loki hated seeing her so scared and upset, clearly very shaken after what had happened. He took a step closer to her and opened his arms, inviting her in.

She hesitated a little. The invitation into him was sooo inviting. Especially with how she was feeling currently. The thought of an Alpha making her feel safe and secure… It was too much for her to resist.

As soon as Hope took the first step, it was like a chain reaction. She rushed forward into Loki’s awaiting embrace. As soon as she was in his reach, he wrapped his arms around her securely and placed his chin on top of her head.

‘Shhh, shhh. You’re safe with me, my darling omega.’ He purred, rubbing her back as he squeezed her tightly.

Hope took in deep breaths between her crying, the smell of him along with the leather and metal made her feel so at home. Her crying slowly ceased and her shaking eased off too, especially when he crooned deep within his chest for her.

It was in that moment that Hope realised she was fucked. In both senses of the word… No doubt eventually, anyway.

Hope didn’t ever want to let go of Loki. She had never felt so secure and safe before. Her hormones were running wild and her body was taking over her mind entirely. The fact she was in the arms of a villain completely flew out the window. 

‘I… I need to shower. I can smell it all… on me.’ She whispered, her voice shaky. 

‘I will bathe you, pet. You’re in no fit state to be alone.’ Loki said softly, firmly. Leaving no room for arguments, and she didn’t argue.

She was giving herself to him completely, trusting him to look after her. Right now, she was completely his.

Loki took her to the bathroom, keeping an arm around her. He was worried if he stopped contact that she would snap out of it and try to push him away, she could be very stubborn sometimes. So he did his best to make sure that wouldn’t happen. Part of him felt selfish, using her vulnerability to get closer to her. But part of him also wanted and needed to be there to comfort and protect her. It was in his instincts after all.

While the bath was filling up, with plenty of bubble bath added, he started to remove her clothing slowly and carefully. She blushed when he took off her bra, then even more so when he crouched down to peel her knickers down her legs.

As he stood up, he trailed the tips of his fingers right up her legs, up her sides and up her arms to her shoulders. Goosebumps broke out all over her skin under his touch. Her eyes were closed until he pressed a kiss to her forehead, making her eyes shoot open in surprise at how gentle he was being with her.

‘Come on, let’s get you in the bath.’ He turned the taps off and tested the water before holding her hand and helping her into the tub.

As soon as Hope sank down into the water, she felt all her muscles starting to relax.

Loki kneeled down at the side of the bath and smiled fondly at her, watching as the water lapped at her skin. He dipped his fingers in the water and swirled them around, slowly moving towards her knee that was just poking out of the water.

‘Feeling better?’ He asked with a hum as he touched her knee softly, making her gasp slightly.

‘Much better… thank you.’ She nodded.

‘I don’t think your friends would be best pleased to find me bathing you.’ He grinned.

‘I don’t care.’ She blurted out honestly, making Loki raise an eyebrow at her admission.

Loki didn’t answer her. He trailed his fingers up her thigh, under the water, and he skimmed across to her abdomen. He lightly tickled her, making her squirm and giggle. A big grin formed on his face.

‘Ticklish, are we?’ He teased, tickling back and fore across her abdomen then up her side, across her ribs, making her wriggle around and laugh even more.

Loki paused his hand on her side after a while, his thumb was just touching the side of her breast. And she was very hyper aware of it. Her heart felt like it was going to burst out of her chest.

‘Sit up, pet. I’ll wash your hair for you.’ Loki removed his hand from her and he moved up to the top of the bath while she sat up.

Hope was surprised with how gentle Loki was while he massaged the shampoo and conditioner into her hair. Her eyes started fluttering closed under his touch. Having him so close, she was still able to smell him. Keeping her nice and calm.

‘Right, head back to rinse.’ Loki pressed firmly on her chest while cradling the back of her head and he eased her down into the water to rinse her hair.

‘Good girl.’ He purred, gliding his fingers through her hair again to get the last of the shampoo out.

Loki helped her out of the tub and wrapped a large towel around her. He then surprised her by scooping her up in his arms and carrying her out of the bathroom and to her bed. He got himself comfy on it with his back to the headboard, Hope was kept snugly on his lap.

She didn’t bother arguing or trying to get away, she didn’t really have the energy. And she was enjoying his company this time, perhaps a bit too much. But Loki’s lap was also extremely comfortable, she didn’t want to ever leave.

Loki smiled when she turned into him and buried her face in the crook of his neck, sighing in contentment. She was so small in comparison to him, but that only made him want to protect and have her even more.

Hope enjoyed how large he was, he truly did make her feel safe and secure. There was also the odd excitement she felt with the fact that he was still fully clothed in his Asgardian armour while she was naked, only protected by a towel. All proper and sensible thoughts went flying out the window. She even thought about what it would be like if he was to scent and mark her…

She couldn’t deny there was something rather titillating about this incredibly intimidating, dangerous, strong, dominant, Alpha man that could be so soft and caring towards her. That she was seeing this side of him, and the thought that he could also be hers as much as she could be his…

‘Are you feeling better, my little omega?’ Loki asked, his hand sliding up and down her back. His question pulled her from her hazardous thoughts.

Feeling rather shy and vulnerable, she nodded but kept her face hidden against him. It was also a good excuse to in-hale as much of his smell as possible.

Loki pulled the towel down enough so that it fell over her breasts, baring her shoulders and neck. He leaned in and started nuzzling at her neck, the tip of his nose trailed up and down slowly. God, her smell was so intoxicating. He almost lost it, wanting to flip her over and take her right there and then.

But he managed to refrain… just. The thought of scenting her, marking her as his became overwhelming.

He flicked his tongue out along her neck and was urged on by the small whimper that came from the little omega on his lap. He lavished her neck with his tongue, suckling too when he found all the right places.

Hope tilted her head to the side, to make sure he had all the access he needed. The way his tongue and lips were moving across her skin had her trembling like crazy. Her body and pheromones went into complete overdrive. She felt like she was drunk on him.

‘Bite me… mark me, please.’ She whined, her hand clutching at the leather and metal on his chest.

Her want and need surprised him, making him pause momentarily. But he grinned against her skin and chuckled. He could sense and feel her desperation for him.

‘It would be my pleasure.’ He growled and sucked hard on her neck, then he sank his teeth into her and marked her with a deep, feral growl. Ashamedly, he came in his boxers as soon as his teeth got into her skin.

Finally, she was his.

He wasn’t the only one to lose control, Hope felt a small pulsating sensation shoot through her entire body, then focusing down between her thighs. Her clit was throbbing. But as Loki suckled on her, lapping up some blood that he caused, she couldn’t fight the overwhelming tiredness that washed over her when Loki stopped mauling her neck.

She closed her eyes with a moan, a smile on her face too, and she fell asleep on her Alphas lap.

[amnachil]

To the Perfection Chapter 3 Part 2

We continue :) A long Thomas’s part again.

Thomas Monday April 22

The teenager woke up in a bed which wasn't his. Surprised, he stood up and looked around. He quickly recognised Joël's room. This one hadn't changed it much since their childhood. The walls were painted in flashy blue. Here and there, clothes and dvd lay around. He had an old tv and a computer for himself. Surprisingly, he hadn't any poster of female celebreties. The ginger went in the corridor. Nobody there. He checked the hour : 2 pm. No wonder he was starving. His thoughts went to Dan, who was probably alone at home. He went to the stairs but suddenly, he heard Joël ask behind him :

"Watcha doin' bro ?"

He turned towards his friend. He was wearing a sport tee-shirt and baggy pants. He held in one hand a bag from the local fastfood, in the other a plate of creamy spinach.

"This is lunch." he precised when he noticed Thomas was staring. "Thought you would be hungry."

"I am." admitted the other. "But I need to go. I can't let Dan on his own."

"Yeah, because staying with him went totally fine for both of you until now."

And a blank. Are you trying to hurt me now ? Is this my punishment for everything I have done ? Being taunted by the most idiotic of my friends alias Joël ?

"After what happened last night, I think we can say you're not emotionally AND mentally ready to be with him only the two of you." continued his friend. "So don't be a moron and come eat with me."

Go fuck yourself prick. Thomas said nothing. He only followed Joël to the dining room. He sat in front of him reluctantly and looked at the spinach.

"What ? You hate burgers right ? I know that duh."

The ginger shurgged and started to eat. He was frankly surprised but his priority was Dan. And Raphaël. I need to make sure my brother is okay.

"Sooo... What are we planning next ?"

"What do you mean dumbass ? There is no we. I have this under control."

"Yeah clearly. You forced Ilhan to have sex with you in order to appease your desire right ? You made Cody's life a true hell. Oh and you broke your brother's heart aswell as your crush's one. Not to mention you almost took advantage of the man's drunk state to have SEX with him. Yeah, definitely you got this man."

Again, a blank. Thomas closed his eyes and sighed deeply.

"You're right." he said miserably. "I need help."

"Heck yes you need help." confirmed Joël. "But what's the plan ? Are you gonna continue your thing with Ilhan ? Talk to Dan ? To Raphaël ? What do YOU want from them exactly ?"

"I thought what I want was pretty clear and caused this mess in the first place ? Isn't what you said idiot ?"

His friend facepalmed.

"No. I said the way you DEALT with your desires led to this." he explained. "But the problem in the first place is that you don't even know what you want precisely. And apparently, you don't separate what you CAN have from what you CANNOT have."

"Are you a shrink or something ?"

"I'm fucking trying to help here ! Stop being so overdramatic and just give some thought to the damn question brat !"

It took more time than he expected. Originally, he thought it was very simple : he wanted Dan. He started by this.

"I want Dan to love me." he said. "I love him and I want it to be mutual. He's sweet, caring and always nice... A bit naive but I like this too. And man, when he ate ! Damn yes, I want him..."

He paused the time to realise he had destroyed all this things in Dan lately.

"But I can't force him." he whispered. "And I regret I have hurt my brother. I mean sure, if I'm gonna ever date Dan, he'll be sad, but I would prefer it to go smoothly... Oh fuck it's too late for this. What I've done ?"

"We already established what you did." pointed out Joël. "What is in the past can't be changed. Just go ahead."

Thomas nodded.

"So I want to apologise to Raphaël for calling him a monster. I'm not sure I'm ready to tell him the truth but I need to at least take responsability for my mistake. Oh and I thought about what you said. I realised I wanted so badly to be as perfect as him... I think I still want that. I look up to him more than I hate him I guess, but it drives me crazy sometimes."

His friend cleaned their plates in silent. He served two orange juice and sat back.

"You know my bro is way older than me so I can't relate exactly, but I think it's pretty normal to feel this kind of things towards them dude." he stated. "Your problem is how special Raphaël is. The man is not normal I tell you. Pretty sure he got abducted by aliens before ! So you can't compete eh."

At least, the bad joke made Thomas laugh.

"Joël you're very stupid."

"I know."

"I owe you a lot."

"I know that too."

It was late afternoon when Joël agreed to go visit Dan. They went together, since Thomas couldn't be trusted. Which, I admit, is true. His crush was obviously home. He appeared drunk again and out of his logical mind. He was mumbling about Raphaël. It saddened the ginger, but not because of his jealousy. I realise how much I hurt him now. It's my fault if he's suffering like that. They managed to put him to bed with a bit of struggle and then came back downstair. Joël turned on the TV while the teenager sent a text to Shirley.

< Thomas : Dan's asleep but not better. You can come over tomorow if you want. >

She quickly replied yes.

"Dude ! Raphaël's on tv." hailed him his friend.

He went in the living room to watch it. What he saw scared him to the bone. His brother had always looked frightening. Mostly cold. But there was something in his eyes which was even scarier. Even through the screen, he emitted so much sadness and distress. He looked empty, like a doll.

"Our team will be at L.A starting tomorow and until this weekend." he said.

His tone. Oh god his tone. It was emotionless, dead.

"L.A is not that far. You should tell Dan and help him go there." declared Joël.

"What ? No !"

He defied his friend's gaze for a while.

"I don't want them to go back together." he confessed finally. "I know it's selfish but... I have a chance now ! I won't have another if they make up."

"You don't know that." countered Joël. "And you have of chance of what ? Do you fell in love with the fat drunk dude I just put to bed or with the real Dan ? Because I'm pretty sure the real Dan won't come back without a proper talk with Raphaël beforehand."

Thomas grunted.

"Look, we don't know for sure if they'll be a couple again. Besides, it's not the point. You hurt Raphaël and Dan and they don't deserve it dude. Now you have the opportunity to try making things better or you can follow your selfish desire. Just think about what Dan wants."

"Okay." he finally conceded. "I'll tell him."

Cody Thursday April 25

This week was the weirdest he had ever lived. He went from discovery to discrovery. First of all, the story between Ilhan and Thomas was fake, as the first had revealed. But it didn't prevent the ginger to come again yesterday night and to sleep with his unwitting fuck buddy. Which led Cody to one of the biggest new of the day.

"He told me he was with Joël all this time." told Ilhan. "Do you think... he's cheating on me ? Arf, I shouldn't say it like that since we ain't a real thing."

Thomas... with Joël. That was something he wouldn't have even imagined one week ago. But now, he was seing things differently. So his crush was getting tired of having only one fuck buddy and went for another ? Well, it led Cody to the second biggest new of the day.

"Do you think he'll fatten him up too ?"

"Wait. What ?"

Ilhan swallowed the chocolate bar he was eating.

"You thought I became like this on my own ?" he asked while making his belly jiggle. "Man ! He's way too much into feeding !"

Now I'm lost. He looked to their friend. Thomas was chatting discreetly with Joël near to the classroom. He was so cute. What about me ? Do I fit his taste ? Cody glanced at Ilhan. They were about the same height, but there was a at least 30 kg (66 pounds) difference between them. He's fat and I'm underweight. Damn, how come I never linked his gaining with Thomas ? Now the real question : Was Cody ready to grow into someone similar to Ilhan ?

Dan Saturday April 27

They arrived in L.A in the evening. The college student gulped. He was in the same city than Raphaël. He get out of the car and looked at the colossal hotel facing them. He mentally repeated the things he wanted to say.

"Are you ready ?" asked Thomas.

He seemed to talk more to himself than to Dan.

"Yeah." replied this one anyway.

They had to do it. I need him in my life. I'm just a complete stupid. This week had been the worst. When he had done his coming out, when Shirley had insulted him back in highschool for being gay... All these bad memories were nothing in comparison. I've been so horrible with him. So unfair. Thomas talked to the reception and showed his ID. The lady gave them Raphaël's room number. They took the elevator in deep silent. It was like a dream. Dan was afraid. Afraid because he didn't know how to behave. Afraid because for the first time in in life, Raphaël wouldn't be happy to see them. But I have to talk to him. They were at his floor. In front of his door. His friend inhaled.

"There is no going back now." he said.

And he knocked. Dan's ex-boyfriend opened three seconds later. He was wearing white pants with a blue shirt. His hair were disheveled. But Dan noticed almost instantly his eyes. They were empty. They had no life in them.

"Hi big brother." whispered Thomas.

His voice was trembling. The college student stood straight, incapable of speaking. I need to say I'm sorry. Just say it. Raphaël slowly turned his head towards his little brother.

"Hi." he said.

The two visitors shivered. His voice sounded completely dead. There wasn't a word strong enough to tell how deprived of warmth it was. The eldest ginger then looked at Dan. This one felt tears on his cheek. He was shaking.

"Do you have something to say ?" asked Raphaël without any emotion.

"I... I... Oh my god."

He couldn't say it.

"He's sorry." intervened Thomas. "No, we're sorry. Darren told us the truth and we're very sorry. Please, believe me."

Thomas, don't you see it ? This thing we have created ?

"Okay." replied Raphaël. "Is there anything else I can do for you ?"

His answer caught Thomas out. Dan sobbed. His boyfriend was gone. Completely gone. He had destroyed the last part of his humanity.

"You don't look well." said this doll of Raphaël. "You should go to rest. Thomas, make sure your friend goes back home safe."

Friend. The word hurt, but not more than the meaningless tone of the person who used it. The ginger closed the door slowly. God what did I do ? Please, tell me there is a way to help him. To bring him back ! He felt Thomas drag him to the elevator. But Dan didn't noticed he was crying too.

To be continued

We’re not having fun moments in this story I know.

But Thomas has to deal with the consequences. Dan’s too. 

For Raphael’s state, it’s pretty simple: he decided to not feel anything anymore, to avoid further disillusion.

Thanks god Joel is here.

[krizaland]

Magnet Chapter 2

Thank you all so much for your support! There’s still more to this story! So I’ll keep you posted! Until then, enjoy

CHAPTER 

TWO!!

Here’s the song I used btw.   First chapter

“Ahem!”

You and Zim’s joyful reunion was interrupted by Dib rudely clearing his throat.

“Dib!” Zim spat out his name like it was poison as he turned to face him.

“Wow, Zim you must really want to be on TV.” Dib flashed a smug grin as he folded his arms.

“This conversation doesn’t concern you! Go wallow in your Dib filth elsewhere.” Zim’s voice was an icy growl as he stood in front of you protectively.

“Oh don’t worry, I’ll be more than happy to wallow in my ‘Dib filth’ in the Mysterious Mysteries studio!” Dib announced as he pushed past Zim and pulled you away.

Zim tried to pull you back but it was too late, Dib had already dragged you off again.

Tears poured down Zim’s cheeks as he watched Dib force you into the lunch room.

“I know the cryptic way they hide it. I see how they fake their affection.” Zim sang as he slowly rose to his feet.

“I’ve tried to understand everything. But I guess I’m just a hopeless fool.” Zim wiped away his tears.

“Dib thinks we’re nothing. That we weren’t anything. Just a basic test. An experiment.” Zim walked out of Skool and made his way to his base.

“I know it’s pointless. I know it’s worthless.” He went inside and dramatically threw off his disguise.

“But I won’t give up! I won’t surrender!” Zim climbed into his toilet and pulled the flushing cord.

“I won’t let him steal you from me!”  He flushed into his lab and landed on his feet.

“I’ll save you! And then you will love me!” Zim begun to type away at his computer

“I won’t let you do this to yourself!” He put on a pair of goggles and a black body suit.

“I’ll save you! We’re perfect together!” Zim embraced a hologram of you before making his way to Dib’s house.

Once Zim made it to Dib’s house, he found Dib’s bedroom window.

SMASH!

Zim shattered the window, activated his spider legs, and snuck inside.

“I don’t get why they’re not listening. I am fighting an abandoned war.” Zim begun to rummage around Dib’s room.

“I tried showing them the way I feel. But I guess I’m just a hopeless fool.” He wiped away a few more tears.

“Dib thinks we’re nothing! That we weren’t anything! Just a basic test. An experiment.” Zim destroyed all of Dib’s security cameras.

“I know it’s pointless. I know it’s worthless.” He managed to come across a small safe.

“But I won’t give up. I won’t surrender!” Zim pulled out a laser pen from his PAK and zapped a hole into the safe.

“I won’t let him steal you from me!” He rummaged through the safe’s remains.

“I’ll save you! And then you will love me!” Zim had finally found Dib’s camera.

“I won’t let you do this to yourself!” He held the camera up high.

“I’ll save you! We’re perfect together!” Zim smashed the camera into the floor.

“You will see. It will finally be, just you and me! Till the end of the world!” He cackled as he crushed the camera with his spider legs.

“I want you!” Zim threw aside Dib’s chair.

“I deeply need you!” He shredded the wires to Dib’s computer.

“I won’t forget you!” Zim used his spider legs’ lasers to blast Dib’s computer to pieces.

“You’re my sanctuary!” Zim screeched as he punched a hole through Dib’s main computer monitor.

SMASH!

CRASH!

BASH!

Like dominos, Dib’s other computer monitors followed suit.

Soon Zim found himself standing in a pile of shattered screens and sparking wires.

“I won’t let him steal you from me…” A few more tears trickled down Zim’s cheeks as he took a second to catch his breath.

“I’ll save you! And then you will love me!” Zim cackled as he picked off the shards of glass stuck to his gloves.

“I won’t let you do this to yourself!” Zim crushed the remains of the camera once more for good measure.

“I’ll save you! We’re perfect together!” And with that, Zim climbed out the window and returned to his base.

Back at Skool, you were suffering through the worst lunch of your life.

“Are you ok, Y/N?” Dib asked as he took a bite of his food.

“Yeah…I’m just fine.” You grumbled as you hugged yourself.

“Really? Because you don’t seem fine.” Dib noted as he gave you a sympathetic look.

“I said I was fine! Just leave me alone!” You snapped as you turned your head away from him.

“C’mon, Y/N! Zim literally had you caged in! How could you be upset at me for rescuing you?!” Dib whined as he shot you a glare.

“You just don’t get it…” You sniffled as more tears streamed down your cheeks.

“What is there to get?! Y/N, you were in danger! What was I supposed to do?! Just stand there while that alien monster did..whatever it was he was trying to do to you?!” Dib defended as he failed his arms for a moment.

“I wasn’t in any danger, Dib! Zim is upset because you’re threatening his life! He would never hurt me because he actually loves me! Unlike you!” You sobbed as you got up and tried to walk away.

“Gah! Why do you keep believing his lies?! Zim can’t love you, Y/N! All he knows is hatred and destruction!” Dib growled as he grabbed your shoulders.

“Dib, he’s not lying! Why can’t you get it through that big head of yours that Zim has changed?!” You snarled as you slapped his hands off of you.

“Because he can’t change! Monsters like him can never change, Y/N! Never change! Can’t you see? Zim is manipulating you! He’s trying to twist your mind to make you do his evil bidding! Y/N, I’m trying to save you here!” Dib wailed as he grabbed your hands.

“The only one I need saving from is you!” You seethed as you snatched your hands away and turned to leave.

“So that’s it then? You’re just going to turn your back on my help? Just like that?” Dib’s voice went cold as he clenched your wrist.

You let out a gasp as you felt Dib’s cold hand pull you closer to him.

“Go on then, run back to that alien monster. Enjoy your last moments with Zim because once your dad sees these pictures, the next time you see him his Zim guts will be spewed all over an autopsy table.” Dib’s dark whisper burned the back of your ear.

You felt a shiver run down your spine as your heart skipped a beat. Your breathing grew shaky as more tears poured down your cheeks.

“Well? What are you waiting for? Go to him! If Zim loves you sooo much then he’d probably want to see you before he gets experimented on!” Dib mocked, his words dripped with venom.

“Ok! Ok! I’m sorry! I’ll stay with you!” You caved as you struggled to catch your breath.

“Good. I knew you’d make the right choice.” Dib grinned as he loosened his grip.

You finally managed to catch your breath but your tears continued to fall.

“Now, C’mon. Sit down and eat something. I don’t want you to starve.” Dib urged as he pulled you back down to the table

Some of the other Skool children whispered to each other as they watched watched the show.

You sniffled a bit before taking a bite of your food.

Dib sighed as he noticed how upset you were,

“Look, I know I was harsh back there but you didn’t leave me much of a choice. If you weren’t so stubborn, none of this would’ve happened.” Dib explained as he resumed eating.

You didn’t respond. Instead, you just continued your meal in silence.  

“Trust me, Y/N. You’ll thank me for this!” Dib insisted as he took another bite of his food.

You sighed as you played with your food. You drew a crude picture of Dib’s face in your food and stabbed it with your fork before putting it into your mouth.

BRRRING!

The sweet shriek of the Skool’s bell put a temporary end to your nightmare.

“Aw man! Looks like we’re gonna have to get you something to eat later, Y/N.” Dib pouted as he got up.

Before you could respond, Dib grabbed your hand and lead you back to class.

You let out a sigh of relief when you made it too the classroom. You and Dib sat no where near each other, so you knew you could get some time away from him.

However, before Dib released you from his clutches,

SMOOCH!

He planted a large kiss on your cheek.

You froze up as your face burned redder than a stoplight.

Dib giggled and gave you a wink as he slithered to his desk.

You rapidly shook away the shock and stumbled to your own desk.

After wiping away Dib’s kiss, your mind went on autopilot. You rested your head on one of your hands as you gazed out the window.

Despite the light layer of grime that coated the window, you could still see out of it.

Two butterflies, one F/C and the other Dark pink, begun to flutter around each other. Your eyes followed them as they continued their playful dance.

You let out a sigh as you watched the show. Oh how you envied those butterflies! They got to relish in the sweet release of freedom, while you suffered in captivity.

Soon your eyelids grew heavy and you let out a soft yawn.

TAP!

TAP!

Your eyelids popped open as you sat up straighter.

TAP!

TAP!

You turned to face the source of the tapping and gasped.

There, standing behind the window without his disguise and F/C butterfly wings was none other than

“Zim?!”

“YES! IT IS I, ZIM! I have returned for you, sweet Y/N!”  Zim sang as he pointed to the sky.

Your eyes lit up at the sight of your beloved boyfriend.

“Oh Zim! I’ve missed you so much!” You cried as you jumped out of your seat.

“I have missed you too! Which is why I have come to rescue you!” Zim explained as his wings fluttered excitedly.

Before you could say another word, Zim’s hand phased through the window and pulled you through it.

Your body shimmered for a moment as matching Dark pink butterfly wings emerged from your back.

You stretched out your wings and fluttered off the excess shimmer before flying into Zim’s arms.

Zim eagerly caught you and spun you around for a moment before pulling you into a passionate kiss.

Zim let out a growly moan as his tongue playfully wrestled with yours.  

Your eyelids closed as you let him explore every inch of your mouth. Oh how you had missed him!

As much as you wanted the moment to last forever, you and Zim needed to part for air.

“I’ve missed you too, sweet Y/N.” Zim panted as he held you tightly.

You opened your mouth to speak but a loud distorted growl cut you off.

“Don’t think you can escape from me that easily, Y/N!”  

You let out a gasp as a large Dib-shaped shadow burst through the window and grabbed your leg.

“Sweet Y/N, don’t let go!” Zim heaved as he pulled you with all of his might.

POP!

Zim managed to free you from the shadow’s clutches.

“Quickly, sweet Y/N! Fly away with me!” Zim urged as he grabbed your hand and flapped his wings.

Zim didn’t have to tell you twice! You quickly followed Zim’s lead as the two of you flew far, far away from the shadow.

The further the two of you flew, the smaller the shadow became. Soon the shadow was no more than a speck as Zim led you into the soft pink clouds.

“There! We’re safe now!” Zim panted as he released your hand

“Really?” Your wings fluttered anxiously as you spoke.

“Yes, really! The Dib-shadow is thousands of miles away from us now!” Zim insisted as he took one last glance behind him.

“Oh thank god! I thought he was gonna drag me away from you again! I thought-” Tears trickled down your cheeks.

“Shhh…It’s alright, sweet Y/N. We’re safe. The Dib-Shadow can’t hurt us anymore.” Zim reassured as he pulled you close.

You sniffled as you held him tight.

“I’m so happy to have you back, Zim.” You whispered as you savored his embrace.

“I’m happy to have you back too.” Zim’s wings fluttered as he gently kissed your forehead.

BRRRRING!!

Just like that Zim was blown away once more.

Your eyelids opened for real as the skool bell rudely interrupted your dream.

“Alright, class dismissed! Go home now!” Ms. Bitters commanded as she pointed to the door.

You groaned as you slowly got up and stretched for a moment before making your way towards the door.

“Had a good nap, Y/N?” Dib chirped as he rushed in front of you.

“Yeah. It was alright.” You grumbled as you rubbed your eyes.

“Well, I’m glad you got some sleep because we’re going to spend all night curing you of whatever alien brainwashing Zim did to you!” Dib smiled as he grabbed your hand.

“Gee, Dib. I would love to but I have so much homework to do. So I can’t hang out with you tonight!” You lied sweetly as you tried to pull your hand away.

“Nice try, Y/N but I already told your dad you’ll be doing your homework at my place! You’re not getting out of this that easily!” Dib chuckled as he tightened his grip.

“Ow! Ok! Just loosen up! You’re hurting me!” You snapped as you tried to pull your hand free.

“Sorry about that. Now, follow me! We’ve got a lot of work to do!” Dib sang dramatically as he dragged you to his house.

When you arrived at Dib’s house, you were greeted by Clembrane.

“Hello, son! Dawww! Is this that special friend you’re always talking so much about?!” Clembrane cooed as he bent down to get a better look at you.

“Quit it! You’re embarrassing me!” Dib whined as he tried to push Clembrane away.

“Aww! I’m sorry, honey! Here! I’ll make you both some special pudding to make up for it!” Clembrane sang as he rushed off to the kitchen.

“Heh. Sorry about Clembrane. He’s one of Zim’s experiments. We only keep him around because…Well, he won’t leave.” Dib explained as he lead you up the stair

“Really? So you’re letting one of Zim’s ‘evil’ experiments live with you and make you pudding?” You asked as you raised an eyebrow.

“Clembrane’s not evil! Anymore anyway! He turned on Zim! The only bad thing about him is his pudding now.” Dib whined as he turned to face you.

“Oh reeeally? How do you know he’s not gonna steal your organs or something?” You mocked as you wiggled your fingers.

“Because he’s too stupid to do anything like that! Look, Y/N! I know you’re still mad at me but leave Clembrane out of this. He’s not gonna hurt anybody because unlike Zim, he doesn’t want to! All he wants to do is make pudding! That’s it!” And with that, Dib opened his bedroom door.

The moment Dib set foot in his room, he let out a yelp and his jaw hit the floor.

His bedroom was in ruins!  It looked like a category 5 hurricane had swept through it! There were sparking wires and shattered glass everywhere!  His beloved computer was damaged beyond repair! There were holes in his chair and even his bed sheets! Even his charging wires had been uprooted!

But worst of all,

His safe had been destroyed

“Woah. What happened in here?” You gasped as you gazed upon the remains of his room.

You had to admit, you almost felt bad for Dib. He had one hell of a mess to clean up.

“Aw man! My camera!” Dib wailed as he cradled the remains of his camera.

Your eyes lit up the moment you heard those words.

“Yes! Now you can’t hold me hostage anymore!” You cheered as you turned to leave.

“Not so fast!” Dib snapped as he dropped the camera’s remains and grabbed your wrist.

“Hey! Let me go! Your camera’s destroyed! You can’t keep me trapped with you any longer!” You  yelped as you tried to free yourself from Dib’s grip.

“You didn’t think I wouldn’t be prepared for something like this did you? I already saved the pictures onto a special flash drive that I carry with me at all times!” Dib explained as he forced you to face him.

“What?! You can’t be serious!” You wailed as you shot him a glare.

“Oh but I am serious! See?! Here’s the proof!” Dib announced as he took the flash drive off from around his neck and waved it in your face.

You tried to snatch it out of his hands but he yanked it away from you.

“Nice try! But you’re not going to get away from me that easily!” Dib chuckled as he put the flash drive back on and hid it in his shirt.

“You jerk! You can’t let me be happy can you?!” You pouted as you folded your arms.

“Open your eyes, Y/N! Can’t you see that Zim probably did this?! He’s too destructive to be trusted!” Dib insisted as he pulled out his laptop.

“Shut up! Even if Zim did do this. he was probably just trying to get those pictures away from you!” You countered.

“Yeah! So he can keep brainwashing you!” Dib huffed as he typed away at his laptop.

You rolled your eyes but when you noticed that Dib was distracted, you decided to make a run for it anyway.

You bolted down the stairs and rushed back to your house.

You slammed the door shut behind you and caught your breath.

“Y/N? What are you doing home so early? I thought you were studying with your boyfriend today!” You dad asked as he fixed his hair in the mirror,

“Boyfriend?! Dib isn’t my boyfriend!” You snapped as you finally caught your breath.

“Aww, honey. You don’t need to deny your feelings. I remember being young and in love once too.” You dad cooed as he put a hand on your shoulder.

“Ugh. Look, Dib got really mad today and destroyed his room. So I had to come home.” You lied.

“What? But why would he do that?” Your dad gasped.

“Because…I wouldn't kiss him! I refused to kiss him so he threatened to hit me! I dodged his hand but he ended up punching a hole into his computers!” You continued to lie and hoped you sounded convincing.

“Dib tried to hit you?! Oh my god! Honey, I’m so sorry! I didn’t think such a nice boy would do such a thing!” You dad gasped as he pulled you into a hug.

“Dib’s not a nice boy! He’s a horrible person, Dad! He’s just horrible!” You sobbed as you returned the hug.

“I’m so sorry, sweetie. Why don’t you go upstairs, and I’ll get this sorted out with him.” Your dad offered as he gently released you.

“Ok but whatever you do, don’t believe anything he tells you! Dib threatened to tell everyone that I was brainwashed by aliens if I didn’t do what he said!” You knew that wasn’t too far from the truth.

“Really? Why would he threaten that?” You dad asked as he raised an eyebrow.

“Because he’s just using me to get on TV!” You blubbered as you struggled to wipe away your tears.

“And here I thought he was truly interested in the paranormal! You think you know a person!” You dad sounded very betrayed as he put his hands on his hips.

“He  doesn’t believe in the paranormal, Dad! He just makes stuff up for attention! He even fabricated fake pictures of an alien to show you! He’s just trying to get famous!” You ranted as you flailed your arms.

“I had no idea he was so devious! Don’t worry, honey. I’ll get this all sorted out.” You dad reassured as he patted your head.

“Please. Please Don’t believe him or his pictures.” You begged as you finally managed to dry your tears.

“Don’t worry, honey. I won’t let that terrible boy get away with this!” You dad insisted as he kissed your forehead.

“Thanks, dad! You’re the best!” You sniffled as you made your way back to your room.

You let out a sigh of relief as you went back to your room.

You flopped onto your bed and stared up at the ceiling.

“Oh thank god that worked. Now maybe I can get back together with Zim.” You smiled as you grabbed your pillow and held it close.

Next

[elisaphoenix13]

Decisions Regrettably Made

A few members of the team decided to drink last night. Surprisingly, Tony was not one of them. Even more surprising was the fact that Stephen was. He got really drunk too, and Tony was willing to bet he got as far as blackout drunk if the way he found the drinking team the next morning was anything to go by. They were all sleeping on the floor. Clint laying on his stomach, Stephen was as well but he was using the archers back as a pillow, Scott of course had to touch the sorcerer in some way so his legs were thrown over Stephen's, and his head on a throw pillow from one of the couches. Sam wasn't part of the pile but he was nearby with his own pillow being strangled in his arms under his head, and Nat was using Stephen's back as a pillow, but she was awake and filing her nails while watching tv. Thor was the only one on a couch and looked completely unfazed aside from Natasha. Tony was pretty sure they weren't part of the drinking squad last night.

"Sooo..." Tony starts and Nat looks over at him. "Any idea why my husband's shirt is missing?"

"Thor and I just got here, but his bare back looked inviting." Natasha says.

"We made sure they were still breathing." Thor gently kicks one of Clint's legs but gets nothing for his effort. "They will not wake up though."

"At least it's not his pants." The engineer shrugs. "How much you wanna bet Mama Bear will wake up for his cub?"

Nat smiles. "I'm not taking that bet because I know he will. It will be a matter of urgency though. If the baby spider doesn't sound alarmed, he will continue to sleep."

Tony raises an eyebrow. "A hundred says that Pete just needs to say Mom."

"Now that is a bet I'm willing to take." Natasha says as she moves to her feet and joins Tony.

"Whoever wins, I want part of the winnings." Peter says as he comes out of his room yawning.

"Fair." Both Tony and Nat say.

Peter stretches as he moves to the entrance to the living room. Thor only seemed mildly interested in the outcome of the bet but mostly kept his attention on the television. When the teen opens his mouth, he only snaps it shut again when the elevator whooshes open and Nick Fury steps out onto the floor. Tony lets out a dramatic sigh.

"FRIDAY, thanks for the heads up." When she doesn't respond the engineer glances at Fury. "You screwing with my tech?"

"I wanted to surprise you."

Tony rolls his eyes. "You visiting is surprise enough. What do you want?"

"Have space to put up a couple of people for a few days?"

Tony scoffs and walks into the kitchen, grabbing some blueberries from the fridge and tossing some in his mouth. Did he have space? He had all the space in the world. It just depended on who the director wanted space for.

"Depends."

Fury rolls his uncovered eye. "You're as charming as ever Stark. When I heard you were married, I felt sorry for the poor woman."

Peter barks out a laugh and Tony throws a blueberry at his son. The teen only caught it in his mouth and munched happily. "Have you been hiding under a rock? I'm not married to a woman. I thought you of all people would know that." The mechanic explains when Fury looks at Peter curiously.

"I tend to tune out the news when you're the subject, but I managed to process that you adopted Mr. Parker over there." Nick points toward Peter and ignores the teen's correction of Stark. "So a man then? Still feel sorry that the poor bastard has to deal with you. So where is he?"

Tony motions toward the living room. "Somehwere in that pile of bodies on the floor. Now back to why you're here in the first place. Who am I babysitting?"

Fury says nothing when the elevator opens and instead steps aside to show T'Challa and Shuri stepping onto the floor. Tony grins and walks up to the Wakandan king and claps him on the shoulder with his free hand.

"Hey Kitty-cat! To what do I owe the honor?"

"Director Fury wanted our help with some of their equipment...Shuri and I wanted to sight-see."

"I'll show you myself! It's handy being married to a wizard. Wherever you want to go, we can be there instantly. Hope you don't mind waiting though. Stephen is currently dead to the world."

T'Challa raises an eyebrow. "You married the captain?"

"Nope. Actually, Nat and I made a bet so you might be able to meet him in a second."

"What kind of bet?" Fury asks suspiciously.

Tony nods to Peter who turns from their visitors and back to the living room. "Mom."

The billionaire had to keep himself from laughing at the incredulous look on Director Fury's face.

Peter huffs and allows a tone of fear drip into his next words. "Mom!"

The reaction was instantaneous. Stephen's eyes snapped open and he got up so quickly that any hangover effect that he might have to suffer through didn't have time to bother him. He was on his feet and in front of Peter before anyone could blink and immediately started looking for injuries. When he found none and there was no immediate threat to be found, he slumped down against the teen who uses his strength to keep him up. Stephen was definitely feeling the effects from his hangover now.

"Don't do that."

Fury glances at Stephen and Peter. "I don't want to know. You people are crazy enough."

Tony watches the man leave with a smirk and then motions toward his pale husband. "T'Challa, meet Doctor Stephen Strange." Stephen slowly lifts his head from his cub's shoulder to glance at the king. "Babe, this is the king of Wakanda and his sister Shuri."

"I apologize for my state." The sorcerer mumbles.

"You look like you had a fun night." T'Challa says with a grin.

"Clint's idea. I feel like I've been hit by a truck at least three times and I don't remember everything that happened."

The king laughs as Natasha turns to Tony with her hand out. "I believe I won that bet."

Tony pulls out his wallet and gives fifty to the Russian and the other fifty to Peter, who pockets it into his sweatpants before leading the sorcerer back into the living room to lay on one of the vacant couches. Tony collects a glass of water and some painkillers, passes them down to Stephen when he walks into the living room, and then turns back to the visiting royal party.

"Mind waiting until tomorrow for sight-seeing? I can get you two settled on the guest floor in the meantime."

T'Challa opens his mouth but is interrupted by a thud. " Mothertrucker, dude, that hurt like a buttcheek on a stick!" Peter exclaims and Stephen groans.

"Please cub...I already have an excruciating headache."

"AHH! Stahhp. I coulda dropped mah croissant!" Shuri says and Peter looks over at her with an excited gasp.

"How much money do you have?" He asks.

Shuri grins. "Sixty-nine cents."

"You know what that means?"

" I don't have enough money for chicken nuggets!"

Stephen almost sobs from his place on the couch and Tony and T'Challa stare at the two teens.

"Oh my god...there are two of them." Tony groans loudly.

"At least someone understands her." The king says.

__________________

Peter and Shuri hung out the entirety of the three days that the royal siblings were in New York. Tony made true to his promise of showing them the sights with the help of Stephen's portals, but it was a bit of a chore when the teens spoke mostly in vine references. The three adults just let Peter and Shuri do their thing. Tony and T'Challa were a little more used to it so they knew how to tune it out, but Stephen tended to look into his cup of tea with a look like the gods had forsaken him. They found it hilarious.

When their royal visitors finally left, with the promise that the New York family would visit Wakanda next time, Peter finally spoke sense and Tony could visibly see the relief loosen tight muscles in the doctor's shoulders. Peter was more than enough, but having Shuri around to encourage the boy was borderline insanity. She and T'Challa made it up to Tony at least by giving him some vibranium and the princess helped the engineer upgrade his and his family's nanotech suits.

"Woah! That was awesome!" Peter had just tried out unleashing the energy his suit absorbed from his father's hits. Much like T'Challa's did.

Tony coughs and extracts himself from the wall. "Ow."

"Oh crap! I'm sorry Dad! Are you okay?" Peter asks as he rushes over to the billionaire and brushes glass and pieces of metal off of him.

Tony waves him off and both let their suits retract into their respective cores and then look at the Tony sized dent in the wall.

"Let's keep that little perk for aliens and enhanced enemies, okay?"

Peter nods in agreement. "Yeah."

"We've been down here long enough anyway. Let's go make some lunch and have a movie night or something."

Tony leads the way to the elevator and back up to the family floor and they find Stephen sitting in the living room with a book and a plate full of sandwiches waiting on the coffee table. Scott, Clint, and Sam looked to have already helped themselves. Their presence only reminded Tony that he had meant to ask if they remembered anything from their night of drinking a few nights ago.

Peter rushes forward and jumps onto the couch after grabbing a sandwich, and curls into the sorcerer's side as he takes a bite. Tony takes the empty spot on the other side and picks up his own.

"What happened the other night? I've been meaning to ask." Tony wonders.

"You just want to know how we got Mama Bear shirtless." Clint snickers around his turkey sandwich.

"Actually, I'm surprised you got him blackout drunk let alone to actually drink."

Stephen peers over his book. "I would like to know where my shirt went as well. I don't remember anything past the jello shots."

Peter looks up at the doctor with a scrunched nose. "How much did you drink?"

"A lot...and that was before the jello."

"He technically drank us under the table." Sam admits.

Tony raises an eyebrow and looks at his husband. "That's really arousing...but none of you told me about the shirt."

"Why don't you just ask FRIDAY to show you the footage?" Scott asks.

"Watching it isn't the same as hearing you guys tell the story." Tony responds.

Clint finishes his sandwich. "We've only seen Stephen shirtless one time and that was when Peter almost froze to death so we couldn't see anything. We wanted to know how fit he was."

"Man, he did not disappoint." Scott practically drools and he curses when a portal opens up under him and he falls through.

"Anything crazy?" Tony asks.

"Stephen made himself a sandwich. He used wheat bread." Sam says.

"That's not crazy."

Sam snickers. "No, but it's hilarious when he called the white bread racist."

Stephen moans and covers his face. It was kind of funny. Not necessarily something to be embarrassed about, but then they kept going. After the jello shots, Stephen apparently decided that he had to practice neurology again, had opened a portal to the hospital, but Sam and Scott had tackled him to the ground and taken away his sling ring. They also distracted him with a teddy bear, saying it was Peter, and he had sat on the floor for a good thirty minutes staring at the toy. Scott at one point wanted to see how far gone the sorcerer was, but was quickly thwarted by red bands and a yell that Stephen was married thank you very much.

Both Tony and Peter were in tears from laughing so hard at the stories, and Stephen was just mortified. He was never going to drink again. They all had their idiotic moments that night, but Stephen was the only one that got blackout drunk. The others got close but they were still aware enough to babysit the sorcerer's dumb ass.

"Next time you guys drink, I'm sending Peter to Ned's and joining you." Tony laughs out.

"That will never happen because I am never drinking again." Stephen glowers.

Peter smiles. "Either way I'm glad you were able to relax enough to do that."

The teen grabs his third sandwich and Stephen ignores Tony when the man waggles his eyebrows at him, and ponders the teens words.

Maybe he needed to find a healthier alternative to relax and have fun with the team. While the night of drinking was fun (what he remembered of it at least), the hangover was not. That had taken him a full day to recover from and Stephen allegedly drank like a college frat boy after blacking out.

Then again, this was the Avengers. They would find a way to get him to drink again.

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s3 episode 2 thoughts

(racing against time because a thunderstorm is rapidly encroaching but i need to know what happens next)

and for once, a storm did not disrupt my streaming experience! but i almost wish it did. because this episode made me very sad. let's jump in.

we got another “previously on the X files” at the start... is that what is gonna happen every time now?? not sure if i like that or not. but i'm sure it was useful back when you had to wait a week in between episodes, to jog the memory.

noooo not the alien gassing scene again!!! it was featured in our recap. and it was just as evil as the first time.

so now the story begins.

we're back in New Mexico. Albert is talking about the story of the gila monster. it is a great story! i wonder if they had cultural consultants for this season, or hired an Indigenous writer.

Albert announces that a great event took place on the plains!!! a white buffalo was born on the same day mulder was revived…. this is a powerful omen of great changes.

(and the buffalo didn’t look white, but tbh, probs hard to find one for such a scene, so perhaps washed out lighting was the best they could do. i understand the constraints)

does the theme sound slightly off? almost like it starts on a different beat now. OH they cut the whole thing short. well that would explain the difference i felt. why would they do this to me? i was well-accustomed to the rhythm! can't a girl groove a little?

okay, NOW we're back to the gun off between scully and skinner. and it’s tense!

mulder bursts in and I’m CACKLINGGG. please, this had to be the last thing he was going to expect. his boss and his bestie with guns in each other's faces. i’m cryinggg

(also her face. her face when she sees it is him. it's sooo good)

“you okay, scully?”, he asks, adding his gun to the fray “yeah”, she says, as she looks at the man back from the dead... ohhhhhhh... the sense of relief

and OHHHH they BOTH pull guns on skinner to get the tape back!! i'm SOOOOOOO seated. this is juicy.

and i hate to say it, but skinner is lowkey making sense here with his campaign to keep the tape. he says that they don’t want it back in "their" hands. skinner seems deeply confused regarding whatever the hell just happened but they finally agree that he should hold onto it for now.

this next part, when they leave his place. man. i'm just gonna keep it verbatim because it captured a lot of emotions:

"OHHHH LOOK AT HER FACE WHEN THEY GET ALONE TOGETHER OHHH SHE’S SOOOO CUTE OHHH THE LITTLE SMILE OH I’M DEAD"

it was SO sweet. she couldn't believe it. he tried to say something but she cut him off, saying she went to his father's funeral and told his mom she would be okay, because she knew it. she didn't know how, but she knew it.

(they were leaned in so close for so long... for a split second i thought they would kiss and then the elevator closed... ohhh. maybe they did and we just didn't see it)

((maybe this is the part where they kissed in the bloopers i have seen floating around? if so. i get it. i think i would have done the same had i found myself acting in such a scenario))

but the sweetness cannot last, and we are back to the hospital, where poor mrs. scully is dealing with learning her OTHER daughter was shot in the head. the head!!! a terrible place to be shot!!! they put melissa in an induced coma!!!!! melissa did not deserve this and scully doesn’t even KNOW this has happened!!

ohh, i’m sad. but we’re back with the lone gunmen, and things are okay in scully’s mind, because mulder’s back and they have a trail to chase and she doesn’t know yet that her sister was shot in the head. and i’m sad because she doesn’t know such a horrible thing happened, but also i want to be happy because she’s happy. her face when she saw him. i will think about it for decades.

operation paper clip mentioned... ah, yes, i have heard of this. they mention a nazi named “Victor Klemper”... is he real? verdict is in, one search later: victor is NOT real. but he has a very similar name to a real famous german historian!

“what would he be doing in a photo with your father”, asks scully. and why did she say this in a manner that was, to me, seductive? you know what? i think honestly it’s a me problem. shame on me for being distracted from the narrative by such things.

frohike and mulder reunion!!! it is sweet. but only for a moment is it sweet, because he breaks the news on scully's sister, who is horrified.

she runs really fast to try and go see her, but mulder catches up to her in the stairwell when she is almost out the door, and says the people who meant to kill her will be waiting at the hospital. oh, and melissa's earlier words from s2 episode 8, about mulder trying to get even, are prophetic here… “cause the only thing you can do for her right now is to try to crucify them", he says. it is a shame her wishes for peace and acceptance instead of violence couldn't be honored, and that going to visit her wouldn't be safe.

at the UN alien council. they are discussing this "serious mistake", of shooting melissa instead of scully. OH! the man from the funeral is there!!!

(for the sake of this episode, he shall bear the moniker "funeral man". but if he has a real name, please feel free to share. i'm asking you to do so. because i come up with these things on the fly. and i really could read the credits i guess but this is mostly just a one person operation with google only serving to check historical accuracy, not things as risky to spoilers as the NAMES of the CHARACTERS!)

((but i did see cig man/cancer man referred to in my notes once as "csr" which actually made sense. because i had spun one of those "fuck marry kill" wheels on here and gotten "csr x files" and i had no idea who that was referring to. but it turns out i did know him. kill btw))

funeral man is calling out cig man’s “ridiculously ineffectual assassins”, which, honestly, what did we expect from krychek? and oh, he is digging INTO cig man. it's enjoyable to witness. he’s being called out for mulder not really being dead AND the tape not really being in his hands like he claims. cig man LIES (average thing for him to be doing, all things considered), and tells the others on the alien council that “i’ll have it here for you tomorrow” which is an awful big promise. a very very big promise. 

next scene: a greenhouse! it's quite lovely until it isn't, because the old man tending to the flowers is victor, a nazi who got clemency under operation paperclip. so a very very bad fellow. scully is being mean to him, but obviously he deserves much, much, much worse. 

he asks about a formula and scully knows it, then says the photo was from west virginia. those are the only cryptic clues he offers. okay, off to a very mountainous road trip. god bless their poor souls. dealing with motion sickness on top of all the mess at hand.

funeral man is receiving a call from victor. they know each other? he snitched that mulder visited the greenhouse. and victor says funeral man was “venal”. new word learned! meaning susceptible to bribery!! is this the truth...?? i mean i THINK mulder comes from money due to the whole martha's vineyard thing, but does he have enough to buy his way out of this?

also. let's ask the real question. why is victor calling and dropping clues. is it fun for him.

anyway, the rest of the alien subdivision of the UN says that they are calling in “their friends who will handle this matter more satisfactorily” because krychek obviously sucks at his job 

KRYCHEK SPOTTED at the hospital! wait no it was actually just another random well-dressed guy stalking about. BUT YOU KNOW WHO IS HERE: ALBERT!!!!

did he come all the way here from New Mexico or was he is in the region... 😭😭 Albert, you deserve more than this earth will ever give you. so much has been taken from you. and yet you continue to give.

our agents are pulling up to west virginia. it looks like a ghost town, and i’ve heard that is an accurate depiction. they walk into an abandoned place. with bats in the building!! be careful!! they are rabies vectors!!!

(can you imagine if the show just ended here because mulder got rabies and died. pause to imagine this with me. then i will walk you back to the stuff that actually did happen)

ohh, and as they enter this place, the score is going wild!!! i'm rocking with it. i love a good score. the suspense is building. i ALWAYS want there to be violins to indicate suspense.

they find some locked doors with keypads, and they’re putting in 27828. it’s not working so he’s like "are you SURE scully?" and she says “i’m positive, Napier’s constant is the basis of all natural logarithms” and i giggled. and maybe also kicked my feet and twirled my hair. 

(i am learning, through this liveblog, that nothing makes me blush more than pretty people reciting semi-obscure facts. make of that observation what you will, because op will be contemplating it for a while)

they finally get it open!! i never doubted your number skills, scully. but before they go in, she’s worried about how he’ll feel!!!! what if his father was a bad guy :( “I just know how it would affect me” :((((( she is so thoughtful...

(i'm torn between making a genuine observation on the fact that despite she just learned her sister is dying, she still makes time to be certain mulder is okay with proceeding because it could be upsetting to him. and the other thing i'm thinking about is that that one meme that says "pearl is so kind" and i'm just imagining scully there instead of pearl. i suppose there is room for both)

back to skinner’s office. cig man has arrived. skinner is approaching him like an animal its prey, while bill clinton looms over the corner. 

skinner says he MAY have found the cassette and cig man is PISSSSSED at the implication he would “work deals”. well king!! you may have no choice!

(i hope that what skinner REALLY has is an identical cassette that just has syllables that LOOK like Navajo code but actually mean absolutely nothing. that would be evil and entertaining to me)

cig man looks like he is gonna CRY he is so desperate! but he is basically saying he’ll kill skinner if he has to, so watch out. and AGAIN. banger tv score as all this goes down.

our agents are in an old mine. it’s very dark and full of records!

(turns on the lights and sees the rows of cabinets stretch for what seems like eternity) “lots of files” “lots and lots of files” <- so true

mulder kinda sounds like he’s gonna have a breakdown. all the files have tissue in them... gross???? he asks when she was born so they can check that year’s files AND SEE IF SHE IS IN THEM. OH GOSH. 

and they find her file right away!!! it has a tissue sample and everything, and it’s recent, and that means the project must still be ongoing, despite how abandoned this mine is.

THEY FIND HIS SISTER’S FILE!!!! we are getting so close to answers. but there is a sticker over her name, because the file was originally his. so someone swapped his sister for him???

he’s freaking the fuck out at some large noises, and he runs and leaves her in the archives. something is hissing. AN ARMY OF ALIENS SCAMPERS BY???? they are running from something. HUH??? dana scully alien encounter??? did they just run by her or was that a different corridor in this endless mountain maze. did she see them. it was like a stampede. very hard to miss.

it seems that the aliens from the spaceship are coming and mulder is drawn to them. HIDE! HIDE FROM THEM! THEY WILL TAKE YOU!

he sees a GIANT spaceship flying over the compound. like giant and it’s super bright and it just. flies over. well, I guess west virginia isn’t a bad place to hide such things. due to the lack of people there.

this is not a dig at west virginia it's just rather sparsely populated.

scully is down in the archives still, and a whole lot of people are rolling up with guns. NOOO!! they are shooting at him!!!! with a stormtrooper aim. he is escaping their bullets as if this is just a jungle gym for him.

REUNION in the dark archives!!! scully found a back way out, where it seems the aliens left!!!! they're running into the woods together!!! it’s almost romantic!!!

skinner cam. he’s in maryland. at a nice little diner in the middle of nowhere. WITH OUR AGENTS!!!!

mulder says the hit squad looked like CIA, and i assumed there was some CIA-FBI tensions, but i’m unfamiliar with the lore, in terms of both real life and txf universe. it seems it’s severe though. skinner says he’ll negotiate their lives for the tape but mulder is like NO the public deserves the truth. which is lovely. i love ideals and sticking to your morals. and he’ll die for it bitch!!! he did once!!

“in your wildest dreams, what do you possibly hope to find, agent mulder?” “why they killed my father. and what happened to my sister” ohhh mulder sounds so scared and hurt... because he is. all this talk of truth and morals guiding his life but also this whole thing is so intensely personal for him, it seems impossible to separate one cause from the other. ohh i'm emotional. 

“and what they did to agent scully”, he adds OHHHHH oh man. his family. they took his family. and he needs revenge, he needs to know. and she is included in that. MAN.

scully says they should make the deal, he says “what makes you think there’s any such thing as justice?”, it’s heating up. again, i say: replace the cassette with out of context Navajo syllables. hire me for the FBI.

i was concerned about scully advocating for the deal- does not the truth mean something to her? of course we know it does, but she is being realistic. the truth won't mean much if they're on the run forever, and there is no one to corroborate their story. but she clarifies:

"i want exactly what you want. but i need to see my sister” :((( they both look so sad

“it’s up to you, scully” he’s mad and torn but he leaves the choice to her because her opinion is the one he cares the most about :( and really there are no good options, it's an awful situation

she said to make the deal, but not hand over the tape until mulder says to. hmm. will this plan work?

“i’m sorry about your sister, scully”, he finally says, and she replies that “i just need to know she’s going to be okay”. but i’m not sure it’s looking so good for her and that makes me SO SAD. on the ride home, she sits in the back and lets mulder take shotgun. and i realize, this is because she’s probably gonna cry back there and try to hide it. OUGH.

albert back at the hospital! he prayed over missy for two days. have we said thank you to him? and if so we should keep saying it until we all perish.

but he has received news from the north: the white buffalo calf that was such a strong omen is no longer drinking its mother’s milk. and the mom is sad, and then she died. this is not a good sign. “for something to live, another thing must often be sacrificed”, he says, and it becomes clear someone is not making it out of this episode. i hope against all hope it was krychek that was going to bite it.

it was not :(

skinner here at the hospital to see melissa. he tells scully’s mom that dana is okay, but in a very serious situation they hope to reverse :( 

albert points out that some guy has been snooping in on their room (and it wasn’t krychek, whose name corrects to all caps in my phone, because i only speak of him with hate in my heart) but just some other similar looking guy. skinner says albert, you stay here, i’m going off. hopefully for some hospital violence. hospital violence ensues!!! and this time krychek IS there.

but the violence does not go in the direction i hoped for, which was for skinner to kick some ass. it's three on one, they beat him and leave him in the corner and take the tape!!!! noooooooo!! poor skinner, i was coming around to you.

also leaving this next part verbatim because it is funny:

"fucking krychek i hate everything about you and i hate your new slicked back greaser hair and i hope you trip and fall and all of your limbs fall off and the doctors wonder how they can even happen because they have never seen it before WHAT NOW HE’S RUNNING??? the car blew up before he ran away. and the folks he was running from SEE him running away so he literally can’t even do a good job at bailing"

(if you need a translation: krychek's fellow assassins stopped to grab some drinks, so he pocketed the cassette and left before their car blew up)

back at the greenhouse. our agents are looking for victor, who apparently died yesterday. and funeral man is here!!! they openly accuse him of killing victor. he does not deny this claim.

funeral man is going on about roswell, operation paperclip, and mengele. he’s going on about hybrid orchids and mulder realizes that victor must have been trying to create an alien-human hybrid. which would explain the smallpox vaccination scars in the alien bodies found in New Mexico. FUNERAL MAN. WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON??

he's on the side of whoever can solve his little riddles i guess

mulder is MAD his dad was involved with this, but scully says it can’t be true, because DNA wasn’t even a thing people knew of until 1944. i mean, they’re lying about a whole lot. why not lie about the timeline of DNA discovery, too?

funeral man says men like mr. mulder were instructed to gather genetic data on the general populace, and that his dad had objected strongly to its true purpose. allegedly this experiment was for post apocalyptic identification, which doesn't really make sense to be, but okay. hundreds of millions of americans had their info collected from smallpox vaccine data.

scully is saying that it’s all a lie, that he’s saying everything mulder wants to hear, and i'm agreeing with her. funeral man says “why would i lie to you?” um better question: what would you gain by telling the truth??

mulder flat out yells that she was abducted by aliens and this doesn’t go over well as you can probably guess. she is working overtime to NOT think about that. so she walks away from the whole thing.

leaving just the two conspirators. OH, listen to this: funeral man claims they took his sister as insurance because his father threatened to expose the project!! “you also threaten to expose the project. you’ve become your father” <- hmm. that is a bold claim. because mulder has never willingly engaged in the creation of alien-human hybrids. 

chat, do we believe him? i feel that samantha’s abduction being an act of random and horrific tragedy seems more likely. and possibly more poignant. 

krychek is on the phone with cig man. “i’m alive. isn’t that a surprise?” “yes, yes, good good good. where are you?” <- LMAOOOO king of playing it casual

“somewhere where you’ll never find me, you double crossing son of a bitch” hmmm. the double crosser gets double crossed. shocked pikachu face. he threatens to make cig man “famous”, which i wouldn't be opposed to, which is NOT the same as endorsing him or his actions. 

cig man says there is no deal to make regarding the files and the agent’s lives. oh, so he thinks he can just have both, i see how it is

very sudden cut to mulder at his mom’s house at 2 am. asking his mom if she ever had to choose a favorite child. she keeps denying and denying until:

“no. i couldn’t choose. it was your father’s choice. and i hated him for it. even in his grave i hate him still” OHHHH this is adding validity to the theory that funeral man was telling the TRUTH???? poor Samantha :(

wait this is SO sad. and to think of how harsh his dad was to him while he was alive. how he must have expected the absolute best from his son because he knows he chose him over his sister. and how the only consolation for having to make that choice is to expect his son to be Perfect. which could never happen. just leaving him in deep distress. man. that is truly messed up.

man. i feel like we need space for that revelation.

but cig man is at skinner’s office. lighting up. as usual. skinner says he has the tape in exchange for the safety of the agents, but cig man says he knows skinner is bluffing

HOLY FUCK: “you ever wondered what it would be like to, uh, die in a plane crash? of botulism? even a heart attack?” <- HUH???? his melodic cadence makes this even scarier. goodness that escalated quickly.

“i’m not finished yet” (skinner fetches Albert) ALBERT??? I LOVE HIM TOO MUCH FOR HIM TO BE AT THIS SCENE. GET HIM OUT OF HERE. KEEP HIM SAFE. OH: ALBERT CAN RECITE EVERYTHING FROM THE TAPE. 

albert please do not bring this risk upon yourself, i mumble to myself OH! he told 20 other people from the tribe. “so unless you kill every Navajo living in four states… that information is available with a simple phone call. welcome to the wonderful world of high technology” wow. skinner if you had access to the tech i know about i think you would be so pleased. or maybe not. regardless, a good play. just KEEP albert safe i am NOT messing around.

cig man gets scared and leaves. as he should!

mulder at the hospital. scully is sitting alone. NO??? NOT MELISSA??? 

no, it can't be true, but it is: melissa died in surgery.

they both agree they need to get back to work so they have something to keep them from going insane with grief. their whole exchange was very emotional and powerful, but i was too sad to make extensive notes, so i'll have to circle back to that someday.

and she says “i’ve heard the truth. now what i want are the answers”. he holds her while she sits and stares at her sister's empty hospital bed. 

NOOOOO. i am filled with such sadness. scully now has to live with this belief that her sister died for her, and that she didn’t get to say thank you. and i’m very sad because i liked melissa a lot and scully deserves no pain. and her poor mother... oh, there are real tears in my eyes while i type this.

and mulder, forced to know that his father chose him over his sister, that his father was involved in what he sought to destroy, that had his father picked any other line of work, he could have had a normal, happy childhood. what the fuck. this is sooo evil. i’m sad!!! yeah i’m crying about the damn alien show. so what!!! so what!!!

listen, just because an episode is sad, does not mean it wasn’t good. it was a very good episode. i’m just sad. sometimes multiple things can be true.

grief of our main agents and their families aside, my top concern is Albert. is he going to be safe and protected? can he continue to spread the oral tradition? maybe get it written down too, for extra insurance? typed up? saved? backed up? written in notebooks? stored in archives? is he even telling the TRUTH? do other Navajo men actually know to recite the files and how to decode them? that seems like it will take a very long time to learn.

my main takeaway from the episode is to not work for the government because they will ruin your life.

it was a good episode. a great episode, even. but I’m gonna need about 30 beach episodes to make up for it. and also for the og theme to come back because you can’t change that up on me once I’m in a pattern. 

[glitterdreamsz]

Scandalous (part 7)

Roger Taylor x reader

Summary: Reader is an emerging actress who met Roger at one of his concerts. They immediately clicked and now they have been in a relationship for almost a year. There’s only one big problem: the reader isn’t the only woman in Roger’s life. In fact he is married and has a child. That makes them keep  their relationship a secret to the world. In the serie I imagined Roger to be 32 years old while the reader would be 27. A/N: Once again, sorry if it took me sooo much to write it. Once again, sorry if this will make you cry. It’s a little shorter than the other chapters. Because at first it was meant to be longer and the last and final chapter but then I didn’t want to let way too many stuff happen just because I wanted to write to a “long chapter” so I divided into two parts. This means that the next chapter will be the end of this series (can you hear me crying?) English isn’t my first language so I’m sorry for any mistake. Hope you like it and don’t be afraid to let me know what you think! Have a nice day xx Warnings: none (apart from grammar mistakes) Words: 1,5k

I tried to live this life on my own But emptiness was beating down the door Nothing makes sense without you It's like waking up in the dark I didn't have a song Until you came along Falling in love with you was easy You were always meant to have my heart I was broken all to pieces You were there to be the missing part (x)

The phone kept ringing as you walked from your kitchen to the living room. “I’m coming, I’m coming!” You said as if the person on the other side could actually hear you. “Hello?” You answered. “Hello darling.” “Well, hello Freddie.” You smiled. “How are you, my dear?” “I’m doing well, you know, we just finished the tour last night. We’re coming back to the UK tomorrow.” “That’s...good?” you chuckled “I guess I have to get some tea and scrabble ready for tomorrow evening?”

“Oh don’t be so boring.” Freddie grunted “You know what happens when we finish a tour, we have a party and you-” “And I won’t come” you stopped him before he could finish the sentence. “Are you planning on spending the rest of your life closed in your flat?”  “No, I’m just planning on not going to places where I’m sure I will find Roger.” “You can’t avoid him for the rest of your life.”  “Watch me.” You replied challenging him. “Roger will be with Dominique and my house has enough rooms to not make you see Roger for the whole night. You just have to stay away from the bar.” “Sounds like fun” You joked giggling as your fingers started to play with the rope of the phone. “You will order me all your drinks and I will bring them to you.” “Freddie” you sighed “The rest of the guys will be with their wives too, it makes no sense to be there to me. I would feel like I’m intruding.” “You won’t be intruding, I’m the host of the party and I want you there.” You remained quiet wondering if it would actually be a good idea to go to that party. “Please come” Freddie kept saying in a higher tone trying to sound cute.

*******

You were already regretting your decision as you put one foot in the hall of Freddie’s mansion, thoughts of what could happen started to run in your mind and the only solution at that moment was to go back to your place. But as you turned around to walk away a voice stopped you “Where do you think you’re going?” You sighed cursing at his awful timing. “Hey Freddie” “Don’t you ever think to leave this party before the house will be completely empty” He smiled at you embracing your figure in a tight hug. “It’s nice to see you.” You smiled back and thanked him as he immediately offered you a champagne glass. “I can say the same.” He sat down on a couch making some space for you. “Well, you look better than I thought.” “Thank you I guess?” You chuckled sipping the champagne. “Did you expect me to show up with bags under my eyes, messy hair and all mourning?” “No, it’s just that after that you left Roger that morning-” “It was a month ago Freddie, I’m good now, I don’t want to spend all my time crying over myself.” “I’m happy to hear that.” Freddie gave you a sincere smile before standing up and disappearing to talk with other guests. What wasn’t sincere, though, was what you told him. You weren’t coping well with your break up from Roger. Seeing him again one month ago only made things worst, the thought that after leaving him he still couldn’t go on with his family life and kept thinking about you was hunting you. You only wanted to go back to him, you wanted to have him but at the same time you had made your decision and you couldn’t, you wouldn’t change your mind. However, as you were talking to one of your colleagues who happened to be there between the hundreds of people at the party, you couldn’t stop thinking about what Freddie told you, you just have to stay away from the bar. It was an easy task, but your heart started to beat faster at the thought that if you walked to the other room you would have seen him. And maybe Roger wouldn’t even look at you being too busy talking with his wife, but you didn’t care, you just needed to see him. And for the first time, for the only time you really didn’t have to, you decided to listen to your stupid heart, you decided to get up from the couch and walk towards the bar. As your heels walked inside the other room your heart stopped. He was there, sat on an armchair and talking with Brian, and as by some kind of magical string that kept you two tied he felt your presence in the room and when he lifted up his gaze it met yours. For a second you forgot how to breathe. For the second time that night you wanted to run back home but you didn’t want to make that so obvious that you walked there just to see him. So you looked away pretending to ignore him and walked to the bar. “May I have a glass of wine please?” you asked the bartender who nodded smiling at you. Your back was facing the guys as you were waiting for your glass, you sat on a stool not caring about what was happening around you.  “Where’s your rider at?” you froze at his voice, he was standing there, right next to you and when you turned to your left you could see him staring at you. His eyes met with yours again and you could definitely see that he was tipsy. “I’m alone” you replied trying to sound indifferent. “Like I was when I woke up in that hotel room.” “You said you would have let me go after that night” You turned around looking back at your glass as you started to play with it, trying to focus your tension somewhere else.  “You told me you would have let me say goodbye to you. You didn’t let me do it that night, you dissapeared.” “I thought that what we did was enough as a goodbye” You couldn’t bare looking at him, you knew you would break right there. “Nothing would ever be enough” His voice sounded like he was fighting to hold back his tears. “I think I will never be able to let you go.” “You have to.” “I can’t let you go. Please-” he almost whispered “Please don’t disappear again.”  He got closer to you laying his forehead against your temple, your body got tensed up and you scanned around the room making sure that nobody was looking at you. “I’m going crazy without you.”  You wanted to hold him, to cuddle him and reassure him that everything was going to be fine, your muscles were trembling from holding back and you wanted to kiss him right there, but you had to be strong. “She can see us Roger.” You said talking about Dominique. “She won’t, she can’t see us from there.” You could feel tears forming in your eyes from all the frustration “I can’t do this Roger.” You bit your lip looking at him with your watery eyes and got off from the stool walking away before you would break down in the middle of a party. “Wait” he held your hand stopping you before you could walk away. “You can’t just leave like that again.” “I won’t have this conversation here in front of all these people.” You dried the tears that started to fall from your cheeks with the back of your hands. Roger started to look around, scanning the area and then took again your hand leading you inside a room. Once he turned on the light you could see you were inside a bathroom and Roger locked the door behind him. “Rog” you sighed only wanted to go away. “Stop it, you need to go home.” “You are my home (Y/N), can’t you understand it?” he looked at you and you could see that tears were falling down from his eyes too. “I’m lost without you, I’m not the same person anymore. I need you to keep going on, nothing makes sense without you.” “Roger-” “Please, please tell me what I have to do to have you back in my life.” He was begging you. “You know what you have to do.” And with that, with your heart broken, you walked past him leaving the party.

******* You haven’t left your home for three days after the most horrible Freddie’s party you have ever been at. However you couldn’t blame it on him, he told you what to do to avoid a catastrophe but you decided to listen to your stupid heart. You were watching the umpteenth stupid love movie again when your bell rang “One second” you said as you turned off the television. A second rang. “I’m coming.” You almost yelled walking to the hall. “Fred” You said while opening the door, “I told you on the phone that you didn’t need to come here-” but it wasn’t Freddie the other person who was standing in front of you. It was Roger, and he had a suitcase with him.

------

IF YOU WANT TO BE ADD IN THE TAG LIST PLEASE WRITE AN ASK. ANY COMMENT OR DIRECT MESSAGE WON’T BE TAKE IN CONSIDERATION, I’M SORRY BUT IT’S EASIER FOR ME IN THAT WAY.

Tag list:

@closertothesunwhenimwithyou @thewinchesterchronicles @borhapqueen92 @rogerfxckingtaylor @richiethotzierz @sleepretreat @stephrivno99  @discodeakyy @dccomicnerd-world @whatismylifeman @rxchel1999 @dreamer7black @ziggysstarrdust @yourealegendroger  @alien-alibii @nataliekilla @killerrogerina @crying-over-bucky @magicwithaknife @llaroztac @cosmiclunas @justonks @fuckinghurricanesoul @yessiyo @butterfliesflewaway @ange-must-die @onceuponadetectivedemigod @kyleetheeditor @beautifulwisdom2001 @sassysunshin3 @hissom1933 @arthurwhoregans @peter-parkersbb @murydedeus03 @anon-1112 @johnricharddeaconn @mickmoon @heyitssophh @goldenpeaxh @ihateevrythingx @thewinchesterchronicles @rogertaylorisinlovewithhiscar @labessieisallama @stardvstial @seasexnsun @ @malek-rami @hissom1933 @oliviaharddyy

[52nddoor]

Books I Read and Games I Played in 2019

BOOKS - 40

I’m counting novellas in a series as one entry since some are pretty short. I read a few books multiple times this year and I listed them separately but counted each only once in the final total.

Thud! by Terry Pratchett (I’ve read Pratchett’s City Watch series so many times I’ve lost count. I ended last year starting this book, so I finished it up as 2019 started.)

Snuff by Terry Pratchett

The Truth by Terry Pratchett (I decided to branch out with some of Pratchett’s other Discworld books, read some that weren’t about Vimes, and began reading all the books that mentioned Vimes or where Vimes had a cameo. Big step for me.)

Monstrous Regiment by Terry Pratchett

Going Postal by Terry Pratchett

Making Money by Terry Pratchett

The Martian by Andy Weir (I took a break from Pratchett to reread what’s probably my favorite book that’s not part of a series. I actually ended up reading it three times in a row? I just like it a lot?)

The Wrong Stars by Tim Pratt (A lady in cryo wakes up hundreds of years in the future to warn of aliens, but humanity already knows about aliens by that time. Except she doesn’t mean those aliens, she means bad ones!!)

The Dreaming Stars by Tim Pratt (The third one in the series wasn’t out yet and I didn’t know that when I started!!)

The Murderbot Diaries by Martha Wells (These four novellas were on my list last year too. I love them a lot and a new novel is coming out in 2020! A security robot hacks it’s own code so that it can do whatever it wants, and what it wants is to be able to watch as much tv as possible in between jobs without anyone knowing.)

Vessel by Lisa A. Nichols

Unseen Academicals by Terry Pratchett (Back on the Vimes-adjacent books train.)

Raising Steam by Terry Pratchett

The Fifth Elephant by Terry Pratchett (Okay look, yes it’s the Watch books again, but my best friend started reading them for the first time, and so when she got to this one I started reading them with her so I could remember every single little detail to talk with her about.)

Night Watch by Terry Pratchett

Alanna: the First Adventure (Song of the Lioness book 1) by Tamora Pierce (Hoo that’s a mouthful. YA series about a girl that pretends to be a boy so she can learn to be a knight. I got a library card so I wouldn’t have to buy so many books but the wait time on this series was sooo long. Because of that I didn’t read them one after another but I’m putting them consecutively on this list anyway.)

In the Hand of the Goddess (Song of the Lioness book 2) by Tamora Pierce

Woman that Rides Like a Man (Song of the Lioness book 3) by Tamora Pierce

Lioness Rampant (Song of the Lioness book 4) by Tamora Pierce

Binti, Binti: Home, and Binti: Night Masquerade by Nnedi Okorafor (A girl gets accepted to the galaxy’s top university, except no one in her tribe is supposed to travel far from home, let alone leave the planet.)

The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms (The Inheritance Trilogy book 1) by N. K. Jemisin (I only ended up reading the first in the series because the books I put on hold at the library started coming in, and between that and rereading the Watch books with my friend, I kind of forgot about them, whoops. The first one was very good so I’ll definitely finish the series next year.)

The Forbidden Stars by Tim Pratt (Thank goodness! The third book in the stars series! I didn’t have to wait long.)

Thud! by Terry Pratchett (Yes the same Thud! that I already read this year.)

The Vlad Taltos series by Steven Brust (Um, okay look, there are currently 15 books in this series and I don’t want to list them all out separately, but I read all of them in one month. They were so good that I didn’t want to do anything else until I had finished and I haven’t stopped thinking about them once I did. Have you read these books? Please talk to me about them if you have.)

Stay Sexy and Don’t Get Murdered by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark (Memoirs and life lessons from the ladies that do the My Favorite Murder Podcast.)

Snuff by Terry Pratchett

Annihilation by Jeff Vandermeer (I saw the movie recently and wanted to read the book, and I’ve never seen a movie based on a book that was so vastly different from the source material while still somehow feeling like the same story. A group of people are tasked with studying some weird shit happening in a particular spot of land and, no surprise, weird shit happens.)

Authority by Jeff Vandermeer (The second book in the series. Takes place back at headquarters after the events of the first book.)

GAMES - 18

Like the books I read this year, a lot of these games were replays for me.

Celeste

Detroit Become Human (This was 1/3 of a fun game?)

The Spectrum Retreat (You’re in a hotel, except maybe you’re not? The mystery stuff was fun and the puzzle stuff was cool for a while but I liked the mystery stuff better and the game turned into mostly puzzle stuff.)

Uncharted 4 (replay)

Rime

Assassin’s Creed Odyssey (Of COURSE I played as Kassandra. #arms #arms #arms)

Tacoma (One of my favorite games of the year. You have to find out why an AI malfunctioned on a space station.)

Deus Ex: Mankind Divided (Replay, one of my favorite games ever.)

Observation (You have to find out why an AI malfunctioned on a space station, only you’re the malfunctioning AI.)

The Talos Principle (I like puzzle games but the sheer number of puzzles I had to solve made it kind of tedious and the ending felt hmmmm not worth the effort?)

Dishonored (replay)

Dishonored 2 (reply twice, once as Corvo and once as Emily)

Control (This game was so dope and I loved it but also I wanted to throw my controller more than once, so the highs are real high but the lows are real low. That said I did preorder the DLCs immediately once I finished.)

Untitled Goose Game

Link’s Awakening (Typing this made me remember that I’m still on the final dungeon whoops.)

God of War (Holy shit y’all this game blew me away. These games have always been hyper violent and now here’s that protagonist trying his best not to let his anger get the best of him so he can teach his son how to be a good person.)

Pokemon Sword (I chose Scorbunny.)

Red Dead Redemption 2 (Shoar.)

2017

2018

[slightly-nerdy-rambles]

TTA Oneshot: Creature Feature

This oneshot was spawned from me wondering why, if Beast Boy can become alien animals, he never takes advantage of that fact to morph into sapient alien animals with superpowers of their own. I still don't have an answer for why he never tried going dragon after the team fought Malchior, though. Maybe that form is too big to maneuver through the city?

Fun fact: the episode Betrothed is immediately followed by Crash, which actually gives this story a neat little niche to fit in. You'll see what I mean later in the story.

(This oneshot is crossposted on fanfiction.net, as part of the Moments series)

Creature Feature Beast Boy narrowed his eyes and stared at his hand. He was alone in the common room, sprawled out on the couch with a forgotten comic tossed to the side.

The Titans had recently returned from their first-ever trip to Tamaran, and it had certainly been… an experience. A good experience in the end, mind you, but the whole wedding thing and Starfire being a princess and Blackfire having at some point taken over the planet and then the wedding thing being a trap that they stopped and Starfire kicking her sister’s sorry butt and taking the crown… It had all been kinda overwhelming.

Pretty cool though. Even if Beast Boy still couldn’t figure out how half the furniture on that planet worked. Was that what Star had felt like when she first came to Earth?

Anyway, point was, so much had happened during their little space trip that he had almost forgotten something cool he’d learned about himself. Now that he remembered, though, he couldn’t get the thought out of his head.

A low whoosh signaled the entrance of another Titan, and Beast Boy’s ears pricked. He sat up and looked over the back of the couch to see Starfire floating through the doorway.

A wide grin split his face. “Hey, Star! You got a sec? I actually wanted to talk to you about something.”

Starfire perked up at the sound of his voice, and she made her way over. “What is it?”

Beast Boy started bouncing in his seat. “So, you know those giant freaky Tamaranean guard dogs?”

Starfire blinked. “Guard do- You mean the gloorgs?”

“Sure, the gloogs or whatever. Point is, when we were trying to crash your wedding, I was able to morph into one! How cool is that?”

Starfire’s eyes widened a fraction, and she sat down and scooted closer to him. “Fascinating. So, you wish to learn more about Tamaranean wildlife so you may better wield their forms?”

Beast Boy shook his head, still grinning. “Not exactly. See, sentient lifeforms like humans are just really smart animals, right? So if I can turn into Tamaranean animals, then I should be able to turn into a Tamaranean. How cool is that?!”

Now, when he had pictured this conversation in his head, this part had led to a lot of gobsmacked awe and maybe a call for celebration over the sheer potential of his newfound power. Tamaraneans were, after all, a plainly powerful race – and not the only one, either. With a little effort, he could probably morph into a Martian, or an Atlantean, or even a freaking Kryptonian.

He could be ALL the superheroes.

Instead, Starfire’s response was simply to clap once and smile at him. “Oh, that does sound interesting! I would be quite happy to share more of my heritage with you, if that is what you wish.”

Well… That wasn’t quite the expected level of enthusiasm. Beast Boy deflated a little, but he shook it off. She probably just hadn’t considered all the ramifications yet.

“Okay, just sit tight,” he said instead, adjusting his position. “I’m gonna try it.”

Starfire nodded, and Beast Boy squinted and tried to focus. His shapeshifting was more-or-less an instinctive thing, but he needed a firm grasp of the animal in question to do it. He was too used to thinking of Star as just another person with powers, rather than a whole different species.

After a few moments, he pinpointed what he wanted and stretched. That was the only way he could ever think of to describe it, even when he was shrinking his form.

It was a… bizarre sensation. He was used to changing shape completely, his flesh warping around itself in a way that was a lot less unpleasant than it sounded. This time the shift was much more subtle – little more than a vague tingling sensation and a few more noticeable shifts in his face and gut. That was… probably a good sign?

Not sure what else to do, he held up a hand and looked at it again, flexing and curling his fingers. He couldn’t see any difference, but no real surprise there. Still…

“Hey, do I look any different to you?” he asked her. “Taller, maybe? I feel like Tamaraneans are all really tall.”

Starfire looked him over and hummed in thought, then smiled. She zipped over to the kitchen and rummaged around for a few moments before returning with a large metal platter and holding it up to him.

Beast Boy squinted at his reflection. It took him a moment to notice what with all the green already on his face, but then his eyes widened.

The whites of said eyes weren’t so white anymore. Also, his eyebrows had shrunk to little dots.

With a triumphant cackle, he leaped up on the couch. “Dude! It really worked! I’m a Tamaranean now!” He started punching the air.

“Okay, when do I get to start chucking starbolts at bad guys?”

Starfire set the platter down and commented, “I very much doubt that you will be able to do that.”

Beast Boy froze mid-punch. “Huh? Why not?”

Starfire leaned back on her hands. “It takes a significant amount of power to generate enough stellar energy for ranged use. It bears similarities to training the muscles to increase your strength.” She shrugged. “I required several years of training to use starbolts with any consistency.”

Beast Boy frowned. “Oh. I guess that makes sense.”

Well, bummer. Still, he wasn’t about to be deterred. Hopping down to the floor, he asked, “So what about flying then? I could still fly around and punch stuff and not have to worry about my arms getting tired!”

Starfire perked up. “Oh, that is much simpler! For that you must focus on the unbridled joy of flight. If you feel flight, and allow that feeling to buoy you, then it will come to you naturally.”

Joy? Piece of cake. Beast Boy squeezed his eyes shut and pictured himself zooming through the air, doing loop-de-loops and punching through walls and all the other cool stuff he’d seen Star do even when she wasn’t hurling glowey green lasers around.

It was going to be awesome.

With that last thought, something clicked in his head and he felt his feet leave the ground. His eyes snapped open to find himself halfway to the ceiling.

“Ha-hah!” he shouted, pumping both fists in the air. “Behold the mighty Space Boy! I am invincible! I am –”

And that was when he smacked his head hard against the ceiling.

“So that’s how I learned that stopping and steering with weird mental flight powers is a lot harder when you haven’t grown up doing it.”

Beast Boy, human again, held an ice pack against the back of his head as he finished his story. From where she was meditating a few feet away, Raven cracked an eye open and turned it on him.

“Did you really hit yourself hard enough to need that?” she asked.

Beast Boy shrugged. “Eh, not really. Tamaraneans are pretty tough.” With a grumble he added, “And now I know why.”

He pulled the ice pack away and frowned at it. “Also, apparently they need to focus on something to make super strength work, too? What is even up with that?”

“Considering Starfire can tear through solid concrete with the muscle mass of a bean pole, I’d imagine a lot.”

Beast Boy’s eyes slid over to her, and a smirk made its way to his mouth. “Buuut, you know what does make sense as something you need focus for?”

Raven opened her other eye and narrowed both at him. “I don’t like where this is going.”

Beast Boy jumped to his feet and started bouncing on his heels. “Seriously! You’re from, like, another dimension, right? And your magic kinda works on its own, so it’s gotta come from whatever species you are instead of being something you have to study for like a wizard. Tell me I’m wrong!”

His companion simply crossed her arms. “I’m half human.”

“Really? Oh, well, the other half then.” He gasped. “Or maybe I could actually be a hybrid! Why did I never think of that before? I could mix together all the best species and become some sort of ultra-beast!”

Raven rolled her eyes. “Hybrids don’t work that way.” Sighing with the air of defeat that said she’d never get her meditation done now, she swung her legs out of the lotus position and stood up.

For his part, Beast Boy shook his head. “Right. One thing at a time.” He returned his full attention to her.

“Sooo, spill the details. What do I need to know about your super-cool interdimensional magic half?”

Raven looked suddenly very uncomfortable, for reasons he couldn’t quite place. Looking back on the conversation later, he’d come to conclude that it probably had something to do with the freaky giant probably-not-the-human-parent “father” he’d once seen in her mindscape (and much later he’d understand that it had everything to do with him). But for now, all he knew was that she was avoiding eye contact and hesitating as if looking for an excuse to change the subject.

Finally, she shook her head and settled on a simple, “Forget it. It’s way too dangerous, and if you couldn’t handle Tamaranean powers then there’s no way you’d be able to handle mine.”

Beast Boy deflated. “Aww, how come? Your powers are a straightforward ‘think a thing, make a shield or whatever,’ right? No special physical training or weird emotion games.”

Raven let out a long-suffering sigh and pinched the bridge of her nose. “First off, it’s not that simple. But more importantly, let’s put it this way. You remember the incident with the Puppet King, when Starfire and I had to save you with our bodies switched?”

Beast Boy shuddered a little at the memory. “It’s kinda hard to forget.”

“You might not have noticed considering your… condition at the time, but the differences in our training and emotional states meant we both had trouble with each other’s powers. In my case, I had a hard time accessing her powers because of the emotional energy they required.”

Beast Boy snorted and muttered, “Yeah, no wonder,” under his breath. Raven turned a withering glare on him, and after a few moments of squirming he cleared his throat.

“Uh, sorry. Go on.”

The sorceress just kept her warning look on him as she continued. “In her case, she was in a constant struggle to keep from accidentally blowing us up.”

It took him a few seconds for that to fully sink in.

“…Oh.”

“Aww, come on, you gotta have something!”

Hot Spot let out a low sigh over the communicator. “I don’t know what to tell you. I was raised by human parents, my powers and the ones the other hybrid kids have are all different, and I haven’t exactly taken the time to study H’san Natall biology. For all I know, you wouldn’t get any new powers at all.”

Beast Boy groaned dramatically and flopped over on his chair. “Duude, I’m having like no luck with this!” He huffed. “Thanks anyway.”

Hot Spot gave him a flat look. “Yeeeeah, next time you want to learn more about the vicious alien invaders who secretly sired and later kidnapped me, just feel free to hit me up.”

After a moment’s thought, he added, “Have you tried Aqualad yet? You guys are buddies or something, right?”

Beast Boy chewed on the inside of his cheek. “Yeah, turns out like half of his powers are some kinda magic that doesn’t come with the species.”

There was a long awkward moment where neither hero knew where to take the conversation. “So, is that everything?” Hot Spot finally asked. “Because if you didn’t need anything else…”

Beast Boy sighed. “Yeah, that was it. Talk to you later.”

The line went out, and he looked morosely over his list of non-human Titans. It wasn’t too short considering there were only five core members and a handful of honoraries, and he’d been so sure he could find something that worked. But Hot Spot had been his last hope. Maybe he should just try morphing into a H’san Natall and see what happened?

He tried that, squeezing his eyes shut and focusing on what he knew about Hot Spot. He strained for several seconds, but nothing clicked, nothing stretched, and in the end, he probably just looked like an idiot.

Well, nuts. Either he couldn’t do hybrids after all and Hot Spot wasn’t enough to give him the full species, or whatever had let him morph Tamaranean didn’t apply here.

Technically, he could still ask Robin to hook him up with the Justice League’s alien members. But if he couldn’t even work out how to mimic his own teammates, what was the point?

With nothing else to do now that his little project had failed, Beast Boy found himself heading toward the garage. Cyborg was there, making yet more upgrades to the T-car.

“This is delicate work, don’t touch anything,” he said by rote as he saw his friend enter.

Beast Boy sighed again and plopped down on a workbench. “Yeah, I know.”

Cyborg looked up from his work. “No luck with ‘Space Boy,’ I’m guessing? Because I hate to tell you, but I don’t think robots count as a species.”

“You heard about that?”

“The girls filled me in.” Cyborg switched tools and got back to work.

Beast Boy flopped back on the bench. “You know what’s really nice? Animal instincts. Not having to work out how to fly, or pounce, or use your teeth and claws, because you just know.”

Cyborg raised a brow at him. “You have to train with your animal forms all the time.”

The shapeshifter frowned. “I guess. But they still make more sense than starbolts or magic.”

Cyborg snorted and wiped his hands off with a cloth. “Coulda told you that.” He frowned thoughtfully.

“You know, maybe you’ve been going about this all wrong. That Tamaranean guard thing was impressive. Have you tried anything new other than sapient beings with complex powersets of their own?”

Beast Boy’s ears perked, and he sat up slowly. “I guess I haven’t really thought a lot about it yet. You think I could do more alien animals?”

Without another thought he shifted back into a gloorg. Cyborg yelped and ran around to shield the car with his body, but the now-alien creature just shifted his weight a little and trotted in place, testing out the new form.

Morphing back, he hummed in thought. “Not too different from some of my dinosaurs, but I still don’t know all of its tricks and there’s a whole planet of probably terrifying animals to explore. I gotta talk to Star!”

Cyborg glared at him, still pressed against his baby. “Please don’t experiment like that next to the delicate machinery.”

Beast Boy waved off the comment, barely registering it. “Yeah, sure thing. Ooh! Maybe I can do hybrids, like a liger or something. Would that be any better than a regular tiger? Oh! Or what if I go the opposite way? Maybe I could be an amoeba. It’d be the perfect infiltrator!”

Peeling himself off the car, Cyborg frowned. “Does that even count as an animal?”

“Not according to modern taxonomy, but neither should alien creatures, so who knows!” Beast Boy cackled and started vaulting up the stairs to the tower proper, two steps at a time. “Space Boy, AWAY!”

He couldn’t see the look on his friend’s face as he ran off to find Starfire again, but as much as he wanted it to be awe and maybe a little envy over his mad skills, he knew it was probably something more akin to pure bafflement. That was okay. As far as he was concerned, Beast Boy had a whole world – no, a whole galaxy of options just waiting to be tried. He didn’t know how many of those options he’d end up using on a regular basis, but that was okay too.

Because whatever happened, it was going to be awesome.

[limpblotter]

Bury Me In Stardust

Summary: @midnigtartist and I and probably the rest of the fandom are hurting sooo take this y’all

Life is such a delicate dance. A pace set in motion by the smallest things, a simple turn could mean the beginning of a new piece or the end of the song all together. That was the absolute beauty of life; the simplicity that nothing was certain and that nothing should ever be taken for granted. Because love was a dance without reason, it could go for as long or as short and it was left to the odds to decide what happened next.

What a beautiful, wonderful, careless, hideously painful thing life was. For the sheer moment the music stopped, the dancing halted, then life would end. And in it's place was the searing complacently woeful silenced called … Death.

It was a slow consumer, Death relished in the soft ease taking over. Like watching a solar eclipse there was no stopping this massive shadow as it crept over Mollymauk’s barely conscious body. He could see the backlight of the sky above against the outline of his undertaker. His executioner, looking down at him like an umbrella as the snow flurries whirled past him.

Stars mirrored life effortlessly. At least to Molly’s knowledge they did. Stars began life in an explosion, a grand entrance into the cosmos and he like to think he did. In his own way, he made his entrance, a star thousands of light years away from anything else like him. One small light, breaking into the dark lonesome world around him.

With every passing moment he met others like him, for brief moments he was caught into their spin before rocketing away to the next beckon of interest. When life offered so many colors, so many variations of beauty, all bright and full of whimsy, how could he attach himself to only one? Light was fleeting, and Molly was chasing it with the fever of a shooting star whose days aglow were numbered.

Then came the change. The moment the universe forced him to be...stagnant. He found himself caught in the pull, in the orbits of new faces. All of which were radically and fantastically different from each other and more so his. Each a color vibrant and unique, a spectrum of people that were like him but so much more.

He remembered these days with an eternal fondness in his chest. He thought after his first year of, life his eyes would simply stop lingering on the romanticized wonder of all things “new” but here he was. Relishing in this new tapestry of a sky. No longer a sole star racing past other points of light. He was part of something, a constellation, part of a larger picture, a more important harmony.

“Ah bloody hell…” he groaned softly, his hands instinctively going to his finishing wound but felt nothing. No pain, no dampness of fresh blood. He looked down and saw his normal clothes, untattered and cleanly pressed against his skin like a fresh wash. Slowly, the lavender tiefling sat up and slowly examined himself over and over again. What happened?

Immediately the last memory of being stabbed while laying on the cold ground, the sinking pain in his gut before everything dulled. He flinched, his eyes casted down as he saw...what looked like himself. But the differences were so striking Molly almost didn’t recognize him.

His spectral eyes scanned his mortal body over, the wounds, the thick, blotches of crimson that stained his open blouse. His face frozen in his last moments, lips slightly parted, eyes wide and open, staring off into nothing. “God I look terrible” Molly forced a chuckle out of him. The sound was meant to be light and careless but broke through his lips more like a pained gasp.

This was truly it, the end of the line. Molly sat down on the ground beside his forgotten mortal body, staring at the flurries that had collected around him. He smiled briefly remembering the magic of seeing snow. Now through the gaze of his afterlife, the snow seemed to do nothing to move him. There was no magic, no chill of excitement, the luster that he had ingrained in himself had also died the moment he did.

Trapped in what felt like a forever in his mind, soft mumbling broke his trance. He looked over and saw by this time a pair of ratty, bandaged Goblin hands were combing through his hair. They fumbled turning soft curls into messily knotted braids, with a few wild flowers and tall weeds between a few strands. “Nott…” Molly felt the corners of his mouth turn up a bit. “What in gods name are you doing?”

Of course she doesn’t hear him. She works with what looks like the nimble, practiced hands of someone who uses them often but the inexperience of doing delicate deeds such as this. Molly watches on in silence before shaking his head a bit and simply sighs. “If I had known I’d get this treatment perhaps I would have died weeks ago…” Perhaps ...perhaps he began to think, he should have.

“Nott, we...uh...we’re moving out soon so…” the voice of a grating human woman was replaced with a softness as though she was speaking to someone who was resting rather than deceased. “What...are you doing?”

Molly looked up at Beau with a smirk, “please stop her, she’s turning my head into a flowerbed.” He teased and naturally received no answer. His smile dropped a little as it began to sank in. He was on the other side of life now, watching with absolute, alien envy of them all.

“I was just thinking...if Jester were her she’d probably want to make him look pretty or something...and if-if Yasha was here she might have brought him flowers...They’re not here to say goodbye...but they should be here.” Nott mumbled a little, as the realization their once large group was nothing more than three, beaten, downtrodden wanderers.

Beau’s face twitched, her eyes began to blink repeatedly as she batted back tears. “Ah...fuck…” she pressed the heel of her palm against her eye roughly, pressing down like a dam against the small streams that gathered. “If...Fjord was here he’d have some good words to say…” They went silent, if their party was fully here perhaps...perhaps one of them wouldn’t be dead.

“You know...you could say something, you have been practicing and all…”

Molly shook his head, “Oh gods no, I’m already dead don’t kill me any further.”

Her face shook a bit, “what’s there to say? I was right there...and I couldn’t do...I should have…” She paused a minute, “we lost a lot before we started this journey, things we could get back or replace in time and hard work...this...Molly, is not one of them.”

Shit...Mollymauk slowly lowered his head to his still, deceased form. That was the nicest thing that trash human ever said to him, he mused to himself.

“—should we bury him?”

“Oh god please don’t my fucking robe—“

“Nah...get dirt on his fancy digs? Molly would die in the afterlife too” Beau responded to Nott much to Mollymauk’s relief. “Let’s uh...lets wrap him up, lets...do him right.”

Beau slowly without looking him in the eye, picked Molly up and began to walk. They didn’t get far into the thicket, but found a rather lovely tree with flowers growing a long the roots. While she worked in wrapping him up in a rather gaudy tapestry of gold and silver, Nott spent a few seconds with her dagger, carving the letters, M.T, into the trunk.

“...See ya around...you fucking…” her voice broke clearly, Molly watched a pained smile across her face as Beau’s eyes welled with tears. Even though he knew she couldn’t, he felt her looking at him, at his eyes as she muttered. “You asshole…”

“Right back at you...wonderfully terrible trash woman.” He held up a hand, as Nott and Beau lingered for only a moment before turning and walking away. He watched them with a longing to follow but knew...knew that whatever was coming for him would come.

He leaned up against the tree beside the carefully wrapped, humanoid figure that was now him. “Now that I’m forced to look at this forever, that is a god awful design”

Molly closed his eyes, waiting for something to bring him to where he was suppose to be. He couldn’t stay in this in between watching life around him for eternity. That would have been a hell...or perhaps this was it and he was repaying for something he had done. Had he done anything worth repenting? He mulled over his moral choices.

Nothing he deemed...totally deplorable.

The soft crunch of feet apparching forced him awake. He immediately went to grab his weapon and realized...he had none. He shook his head, it was going to take a while to get out of the habit of being...well...alive. He looked at the figure approaching, eyes tensed, hands nervously rubbing over each other, “Caleb—“

“Molly…” He seemed to almost react as though he heard him, Molly allowed himself a small bit of hope perhaps the strange, uniquely wonderful wizard could. Most likely not, but still. Slowly the red haired human man, walked around to the other side of Molly’s wrapped corpse and gingerly began to unwrap just his face.

Eyes still blazed open and wide.

“Hasn’t anyone told you, staring is rude…” Mollymauk kept his own gaze away. He didnt have the stomach to star at himself much longer.

“I was not prepared to lose you today…” Caleb muttered…”You should know I was prepared to leave...ya...that night before when I was on watch alone...I really thought about leaving...Because I had no place here, with them, with you.” He motioned with his hand, “I am not strong enough to do anything but hid, my whole purpose has nothing to do with any of you but...I couldn’t do it.” Caleb slowly brought his knees to his chest.

“Oh Caleb, enough of that now it's…” He reached with his phantom hand and phased right through Caleb’s cheek. Molly froze in mystified horror.

Caleb roughly rubbed his face, pulling at the growing roots of his facial hair. “But how could I leave all of you...Beau, Nott...you...I don't belong here, especially with you, a fucking rainbow...ja but I guess I have trouble letting go…”

Molly turned his head and watched as Caleb began to rummage through his pockets, muttering frantically under his breath. He watched with somber interest as gently Caleb moved his hands over Molly’s opened eyes and closed them once more. He placed two dull copper pieces over each eye. “We’ll talk about this later…” Caleb cracked a smile, a small lopsided grin before leaning in. His lips softly pressed against the cold flesh of Mollymauk’s chilled lavender forehead. “Mr. Mollymauk.”

A delicate, almost thin layer of magical essence coated Molly as Caleb gingerly wrapped him up again. Molly felt the warmth of the magic over his skin and broke into a small cry. “Later then...Mr. Caleb” He smirked, head resting on the tree.

For all the while, he chased life, knowing that he was hurling towards death. A pull he knew, whether he liked it or not he was on borrowed time, a borrowed body...a borrowed life and soon it would be time. He thought he had grown to accept it, like stars once blinking balls of light and fury also came to their inevitable ends. Their light still stained the skies for many years to come.

Mollymauk had seen his life such as that, a star. Who once blown out, his life and light would remain for a few more years after him.

But he was not at peace with this. He wasn’t chasing life and waiting for death. He had been running from death. Desperate to prove he deserved to be alive because he lived so extreme in every moment. His downfall no doubt. He deserved this body, this life, this chance...he deserved more than nothing.

Molly curled into himself, pressing his head to the top of his knees as tearless sobs broke through his rib cage. He didnt want this. He refused, he wanted to live, he wanted more moments in the sun. More cold nights around a fire, he wanted the pains of fight and the ecstasy of love of someone he loved in return.

“I suppose we’ll have to try again, Molly” A woman’s melodic voice whispered to him. Molly turned his head a bit and stared at the faint, pale glow of a beautiful elven woman who was a few feet away from him. He...knew this aura...he had felt her before in his darkest hours. “Come...lets ...find you a way out before he does.”

Molly slowly rose to his feet, he took one glance back at his body and then at the elf woman.

His soul departed, unsure to where or what. But he followed the woman to whatever she had planned for him.

Slow did a star form beside the full moon that night.

As the moonweaver walked her son to his new, great beginning.