#and then meanwhile they’re so protective of the kids for other reasons like oh no don’t possibly climb on top of the monkey bars

[galaxywhale]

mentioned twice now that I think we need to start getting the kids to eat lunch in the shady side of the courtyard again because where they are currently, there’s no shade at all, we’re forcing kids to sit in the full sun for like 20 then 15 minutes a day when the UV is already high enough to require sun protection and there’s always at least a couple who don’t have a hat, and then today I did get them to eat over there

and idk she doesn’t seem to care lol and had them back in the full sun again and I’m like :|

[suguru-getos]

— satosugu as boyfriends —

it’s hard to decide who’s your bigger fan, satoru or suguru. they’re so in love with everything you do & are so supportive! it took a LOOONNNGG way though— let’s say you met them when they were still in school & so were you. though — you were not a sorcerer. satoru doesn’t mind, he hated non-sorcerers before for making him the reason he’s so looked upto. now thanks to suguru, he wants to protect them. suguru knew you much before than satoru, you were his neighbor after all. how else could you hangout with people who have such major power differences?

things changed after the riko incident— you could see the hatred that suguru slowly festered within him. there were days satoru came to suguru’s apartment to relax & play games with their other juniors like nanamin or haibara. these days you could hardly see the fun… suguru goes out and comes home & that’s all. you and him used to play together as kids and despite you reaching out, suguru was shutting down.

it was until he killed his own parents — that satoru took matters into his own hands. killed hundreds of people & adopted, some girls!!?!?!?? what was even happening!! to protect you, satoru shifted you to the gojo estate. it was simple really, you were a non-sorcerer & suguru would not really care about your life right now just to prove a point.

a year went by just processing what was happening. of course— spending a year with gojo satoru also meant that you two had become incredibly close. earlier, you were invited by suguru over because you & him had always played gaming consoles together. right now, it was totally different. you didn’t know satoru was so mature, and so kind when needed, although keeping his childishness still intact. you were the only one he could openly talk about suguru with. not even shoko — her & yaga had started calling him geto to detach maybe. yet it’s endearing to see such fondness in satoru’s eyes for his bestfriend aka almost lover aka what could have been.

long story short— suguru could not kill you. it’s sickening to think he could do so with his parents but after a year or two when he finally went to the gojo estate having known your whereabouts & missing the chaste peck he stole when things were alright. he cried. hugging you tenderly. expressing how he thinks he shouldn’t have been high on adrenaline that day & did what he did… he wants people like satoru to suffer less. he wants to do something ‼️

it takes a while for suguru to start healing, no one suspects that the strongest sorcerer satoru gojo had secretly kept his best friend in the gojo estate along with his almost girlfriend. :33 even the girls are present with megumi and tsumiki & despite their contrasting personalities— things have seemed to settle for once.

you knew suguru liked to cook so you were now greeted by him preparing you the sweetest ever breakfast in bed, meanwhile satoru insisted you sleep with him (to protect you) :3 yeah as ifff 💁🏻‍♀️ man was too shy to make the first move just yet because you had been trusting him so good. afraid to fuck up. though when you agree? oh he is out of this world. suguru is happy too, in a way he also gets to spoil satoru like this.

satoru uses his old money to ensure you three go on trips at least once every 2-3 weeks. the recent one that you remember is paris. for new years !! it was beautiful to confess your love for each other and finally officially start dating. you were spoiled by insanely hot balcony sex that day. ;)

suguru has improved & also started honing his skills. though during one of the much intimate conversations, you had asked him to trust you enough to come home to after swallowing the sabotaging negativity of a curse & to let you kiss it away. <3 you trust him to follow through with it.

suguru can get especially testy when you’re around your period and satoru decides to mess with your mood. normally, satoru’s teasing is ignored but during those days he gets smacked from sugu. :3 satoru just wants your mood to be better :(( not in the same sense as suguru perhaps. so satoru takes on the role of your sugar daddy as usual. getting you your favorite snackies and stuff.

there is no power dynamic as such between the two of them. really— they’re just equals and you like that despite being in a relationship, satosugu can be switches to each other and daddy doms to you as always.

satoru was the first one who discovered that making you feel smaller, would regress you up a little. you’d cutely pout & get subby and babytalking to you during that rare occaision would actually get him you in the form of putty in his hands. so satosugu are mostly like “let daddy handle it sweetness.” / “oh no you’re too small for that, give me.” / “no baby you can’t reach there, let daddy help.” and ugh it makes you so fucking submissive for them they love that & YOU love that😩

satoru and suguru together decided to get you another cat which would be a cute little brother for your pet. they are such good pet fathers you often wonder how good they’d be to kids — oh wait, 😏 you have their adopted babies to witness that first hand too! how lucky! 🍀

nsfw hcs later alligator i’d elaborate on this more later too! enjoy my word vomit besties 👯‍♀️ send me jjk askies 🙇🏻‍♀️ thank you!

[electricbathsalt]

I saw a recent post on r/bokunoheroacademia about “how can you possibly feel bad for Chisaki” and like…it’s not the “how can you feel bad for child abuser” itself that boggs me, but rather how people in comments repeat over and over “oh boss was so kind to him tried to guide him but he still became a poss he was evil from birth” and I’m like where are people who can look above the “what text says” level of understanding

Oh my lords, that’s my least favorite type of Chisaki hater. Like fuck dude you can dislike a character, but 1: do you have to police everyone who does like them, and 2: you clearly didn’t care enough to actually understand his character and story before you decided that there’s no reason to like him/have empathy for him.

What I hate most is not people disliking Chisaki. I don’t really care about that. I hate people who clearly don’t understand the character they’re slandering. If you’re going to publicly complain about a character, please do it while having an actual clue of what the fuck you’re talking about.

“Pops was so kind to him and constantly tried to steer him down the right path!!” Pops was a fucking Yakuza leader who never called Chisaki by his given name once in his life. Meanwhile, we don’t even know Pops’ real name because Chisaki never failed to call him either “Pops” or “Boss”. The “constant steering down the right path” was just “hey, don’t do that violence, only the violence I want you to. Im gonna scold you”. Idk man, but if I had a kid who I picked up off the streets, I’d probably get them into therapy literally as soon as they’d had a drink of water, a good meal, and a full night’s rest. But Pops decided that wasn’t worthwhile even when the child started exhibiting blatantly concerning behavior. He decided slapping Chisaki on the wrist was the most effective method to get him mentally stable. Ah, yes, reprimanding; the best way to get rid of violent tendencies, self-worth issues, and attachment/abandonment issues in your traumatized child, who you are raising in the mafia. Flawless.

Saying Chisaki was “born evil” is actually so absurd that it kinda makes me wanna laugh. It goes completely against what the entire point of MHA is, or supposedly is. Just because his entire childhood wasn’t spoon-fed to you does not mean it was a good one that didn’t at all influence him into being the way he is. Even the absolute crumbs we get from canon don’t imply he had a “good” childhood. “Pops was so good to him, though—“ he was a yakuza leader who integrated the child he took off the streets into his gang, without ever doing anything to help resolve any of the trauma he went through (and inherently gave him more via being in the yakuza). He was disowned by his daughter, who he called a fool for having a rash reaction to her child killing her husband, and never bothered to reach out further to her. He put Eri in Chisaki’s care, knowing of Chisaki’s violent behavior. The only “positive” flashback we ever get of Chisaki & Pops’ relationship is when Chisaki got scolded, and then told “thank you for protecting the Hassaikai’s honor”. And something tells me that any “praise” Chisaki ever got from Pops was to do with the Hassaikai, esp considering Chisaki’s unnaturally-strong dedication to it. I’m tired of people pretending that Chisaki’s pure evil that prevailed over a sweet, innocent man. Chisaki wasn’t even the only one who experienced ill-treatment from Pops—his entire fucking family did.

The other thing is—Chisaki was literally doomed from the start. The only two people we get to know he was ever in the care of were both people who would inevitably turn Chisaki into a criminal/villain. Him being anything else was something that was never even allowed to grace his mind.

[ikatako38]

Squidmas Special ‘23

Rating: G, Word Count: 4,863

This special was originally posted on AO3 in two parts between Chapter #22 - 1 and Chapter #22 - 2. It takes place 8 years after the end of TPWCH. Ryland, Three, and Captain are all the same person! I also made this relationship chart to help since there’s so many characters being introduced so quickly. And yeah, Koi’s birthday is on Squidmas, so they’re celebrating both events together. The story starts below the cut!

“You’re sure it’ll be okay? It’s just… there’s gonna be so many people…”

“Yes, Capa. It’s gonna be okay. We have to let Tsuku spread her wings. She has to be able to take risks in order to live her life. We took plenty of them.”

“I know, I know…”

“And, hey. If anything goes wrong, we’ll both be there to protect her.”

The Inkling took their husband’s hands playfully. “I think that would just be you.”

“You’re telling me the Captain of the New Squidbeak Splatoon wouldn’t be able to hold off a couple of fourteen-year-olds? Because I know they could.” Eight bopped the white puff on the end of Captain’s Squidmas hat.

“I get nervous around little kids! I don’t know what to do or say! You know this.”

“Is that what it is? You’re nervous the kids won’t like you?”

“I mean…” Captain shrugged. They hadn’t been consciously thinking about that, but now that Eight mentioned it, maybe that was part of their hesitation.

“It’s all right to feel nervous… but kids always love you! Remember that one at Tako Bell who—”

“Yeah, yeah I know. I’m probably worrying for no reason.”

“Such is life.”

“And… what about the other parents? They’re probably all cishet Inklings, and we’re so much younger than everyone else…”

“If anything goes wrong, we can leave, okay? Or you can leave and I can stay… or whatever works in the moment.”

Captain nodded, and after a moment he raised his head to kiss Eight. “Okay, now where’s Tsuku?”

Captain made their way to their daughter’s bedroom door. “Hey Tsuku, it’s about time to go!”

“Ah, sorry, sorry… just five more minutes!”

“Okay koko, just come out to the living room when you’re ready!”

Returning to the living room, Captain saw Eight waiting, now with his shoes on.

“Tsuku’s still going to be about ten minutes,” Captain explained.

Eight checked his phone. “We’re going to be late…”

“That’s okay.”

“Yeah. Yeah it is.”

Captain ended up opening one of the dumb word games on their phone, and Eight did his best to help, until Tsuku appeared in the hallway. She was wearing a cute little red dress with white flats. Captain bent down closer to her and gushed, “Myushi-myushi ba~!

“Oh my cod, Fufu.”

Captain kissed the top of Tsuku’s head. “C’mon, let’s go!”

It was only a short train ride, and then they were standing at the front door of Koi’s family’s house.

“Um… do we knock…?” Eight murmured.

They looked at each other, and Captain shrugged. Then they both jumped back when Tsuku stepped up between them and gave the door a confident rap. Koi opened the door a few seconds later, and her orange pigtails flopped over Tsuku’s shoulders as they hugged tightly. Captain and Eight threw each other an awkward glance as they waited in the blocked doorway, and the two young Cephalings didn’t separate until another voice from inside the house called out, “Tsuku! You made it!”

The Inkling who had just started going by KJ ran up to them and hugged Tsuku too, although—both Captain

and Eight noticed—this one was much shorter.

Meanwhile, Koi stood on her toes and said, “Hello, Mr…. um… and… uh… sorry, are you… Tsuku’s parents?”

“Yep,” Eight said. “You can just call us us Eight and Captain… or Tsuku’s dad and parent, if that’s easier. The last names are sort of complicated.”

“Oh, okay! Welcome to our home… sorry again.”

“It’s totally okay! No harm done.”

As they entered, following behind the girls and KJ, Captain made a whining sound and whispered to Eight, “That was so awkward…”

Eight gave him a quick kiss on the forehead. “I know it’s hard. You’re doing great.” Eight also slipped his hand into Captain’s for support.

A few seconds later, they arrived in the kitchen, where René was at the dining table trying to explain the rules of chess to Cody, seemingly rather unsuccessfully. Beyond that was the living room, where eight adults sat on several sofas and armchairs arranged in a U-shape around a low coffee table, conversing in groups of two or three. A Squidmas tree in the corner glistened with ornaments and tinsel.

When René and Cody saw them, they both got up and raced toward them. Cody got there first and gave Tsuku a quick hug before rattling off a long stream of almost unintelligible words while bouncing on his heels excitedly. Then René hugged her too, but, unless Captain was mistaken, it seemed a bit more awkward than the others had been.

“Hi boys, nice to meet you. I’m Eight, Tsuku’s dad.” Eight shook each of their hands.

Captain just kind of smiled at them.

Thankfully, Cody interrupted: “René was just showing me this game called chest!”

“Chess,” René corrected.

“And there’s all these little figurine things that are so cool, my favorite is the little horse!”

“Knight.”

“And to win the game you have to trap the other player’s king, and it's called a checkmake!”

“Checkmate.”

“C’mon, René can show us how to play, he’s so good at explaining things!”

Tsuku, Koi, and KJ looked at each other, shrugged, and then started to gather around the table.

Eight squeezed Captain’s hand. “Ready?”

“As I’ll ever be…”

They hadn’t stepped two paces into the living room when a woman with long orange tentacles jumped up from a sofa to face them. “Oh, welcome! You must be Tsuku’s parents, then? Eight and Captain, right? Here, take our seats!” She started tugging at the arm of the man next to her until he stood.

“Oh, no, it’s okay!” Eight tried.

“No, I insist. Have a seat.”

So Captain and Eight scooted in next to a pale woman with frizzy purple tentacles, just like her son.

“You must be Cody’s mother?” Eight said.

“Yep. Alicia. Nice to meet you.”

“Likewise,” said Eight.

“And you’re Tsuku’s parents?”

“Right. We—”

“Oh, of course!” Koi’s mother interrupted, now sitting on the floor with her legs folded. Her voice was so strong that the other conversations quickly fizzled out. “Everyone, these are Tsuku’s parents, Eight and Captain. Eight and Captain, you’ve just met Alicia.” She pointed to a Black family with green tentacles sitting together on the sofa against the left wall. The husband and wife seemed to be the oldest out of everyone there, while the third person was the youngest. “These are Atlas and Jeane, René’s parents. And Atlas’s son Alex, just next to them.” Now she gestured toward the couch on the right, where another couple sat, this one with magenta tentacles. “And KJ’s parents, Vanessa and Robert. Have I missed anyone? Oh, of course! I’m Koi’s mother, Amanda, and this is my husband Glen.”

“Nice to meet you all,” Eight said.

“Nice to meet you,” Captain managed to squeak out, adding a little wave.

“You know, you both look so young for your age,” Amanda continued. “I’m so jealous!”

“Actually, I’m only 26…” Captain explained.

“Oh!” Captain could see the gears turning in Amanda’s head, trying to do the math.

“Um… we adopted her when she was six. I was only eighteen, so it was a hard decision, but she didn’t have a home, and we were the only ones who could take her in. I’ve always been… something between a sibling and a parent to her.”

“I see. Well, from what I hear from Koi, you’re doing a great job.”

Captain thought of several things to say, but he couldn’t get his mouth to form the words.

“Oh… have I said something?”

“Sorry, sorry! That just… means a lot, is all. Thank you.”

Amanda directed her next question at Eight, which Captain was grateful for. “So how long have you two been together?”

Eight looked at Captain with such a reminiscent, loving expression that it nearly made Captain blush in front of everyone. “We met each other eight years ago in July, and we started dating in November. We got married three years later, and we just had our fifth anniversary in August.”

Captain was frozen the whole time, staring down at a certain spot on the carpet. But when Eight shifted and leaned into him slightly, it broke the trance, and Captain looked up at him. They shared a smile.

“Remember our fifth anniversary, hun?” said Vanessa. “That feels so long ago.”

“Well, we are getting dangerously close to our twentieth, aren’t we?” Robert said back with a chuckle.

“At least you’re not staring down your fiftieth birthday,” Atlas remarked, with such an even tone Captain wouldn’t have known what to make of it if the smile hadn’t given it away.

“Fifty? No~!” Glen said with incredulity.

“Only two months left. I might as well start digging my grave now.”

“Oh my cod, dad…” the son, Alex, groaned.

“Oh, like you’ve never been dramatic about your age. I’m 14, I’m basically an adult,” Atlas mocked, using a deeper voice.

Alex rolled his eyes and went back to scrolling on his phone, but just after the conversation picked up again and everyone else had turned their attention elsewhere, Captain noticed that Altas nudged his son, and they both shared a smirk that somehow seemed to convey a strikingly strong bond of love between them.

Captain snapped to attention when they heard their name; it was coming from Amanda again: “Thank you again for coming, Captain, Eight. I’m sure Koi will love having Tsuku here. And it’s so nice to finally meet you both! And the same to you too, of course, Atlas and Jeane.”

A knock came from the front door. Captain whipped their head around toward it and made a confused face. They were sure that their family had arrived last, and everyone who they had expected to to come was already there. So who could this be at the door? Perhaps a pizza delivery or something?

They all already knew that the kids would beat any adult to the door, so they just waited, and Captain watched the archway to the kitchen anxiously, until finally someone stepped through—

“Lyle? What…” Captain couldn’t stop the exclamation before it was already out of their mouth.

“Heya, Captain. And everyone,” Lyle said with a smug grin. Eli stepped into view a moment later, holding his husband’s hand, and with his other hand he towed little Tempest behind him.

“Hi Amanda, thank you for having us!” Eli said.

“Also, um… Tempest’s bio moms wanted to come too at the last second, I hope it’s all right that we brought them along.”

And now the Meer-Hannon family stepped forward to reveal Agents Four and Neo Three—but they really should be calling them Aubrey and Yuki in a context like this. Each one was holding an infant with yellow ink.

Amanda jumped up from her seat again to greet them. “Oh, of course! Thank you so much for coming, I’m sure Betta will be delighted to see Tempest. She’s outside with Ava and Kate.”

“Do you wanna go outside?” Eli asked Tempest.

Tempest looked toward the sliding-glass door but shrunk back away from it, into Eli’s body. “You don’t have to,” he soothed. “You can stay in here if you want.”

Then Koi’s younger sister Betta poked her head in from outside. “Tempest?”

“Betta!” And any apprehension disappeared.

Captain jumped when Alicia called out from right next to him, “Kate? Is everyone doing okay out there?”

Now the older Larsen’s face appeared in the door. “Yep, all good, mom! Betta bit Aaron’s finger, but he’ll survive!”

“Aaron, are you sure you’re okay?” Alicia called back.

“Yes, Ms. Caruso, I’m fine!” a slightly strained voice called back.

“Betta!” Amanda called over them, jumping up yet again and heading for the door. “We do not bite our guests!”

“You want me, you get the whole package,” Kate joked.

“I wouldn’t trade it for the world,” Aaron said, coming just far enough into view that Captain could see him staring into her eyes. The scene was sickly sweet. Cod, had Captain and Eight been like that when they were younger?

Yes. Yes, they had been.

Then Captain’s thoughts were interrupted by a desperate cry of “FUFU!”

“Koko… woi’e bare?” Captain responded instinctively. Then they froze. Terrified, they shot a quick glance back at the other parents. None of them seemed to be staring at him—at least not directly—which he took as a good sign.

“What is it, Tsuku?” Captain said, hoping it would encourage her to respond in Inkling.

It worked, but it wouldn’t have mattered anyway since Tsuku got close and whispered, “I forgot the gift for the Secret Snowsquid!”

The gift… had they left it at home? Wait. Captain felt his pocket and, sure enough, he felt a small box covered in wrapping paper. “Oh, I have it here! I grabbed it just in case.”

Captain held it it to her, and the distress was replaced by a huge grin of relief as she took it. “You had it the whole time? Why didn’t you tell me!”

Captain lifted their hands in a shrugging pose. “I forgot.”

They both giggled. “Thank you, Fufu!”

“Of course, Koko. Are you having a good time?”

“Yeah! I just beat everyone in Super Splat Squids!”

“I’m glad all the years of indoctrinating you into video games paid off.”

“Okay, I’m gonna go back now. Thank you!” She gave them a quick hug.

“Of course.”

And now everyone was staring at them.

“Aww, you have such a cute relationship with her!” Vanessa said.

“Oh. It’s uh… nothing special,” Three murmured.

Now Amanda returned from outside.

“I’m so sorry about that again, Alicia.”

“Oh, I’m sure Aaron will be fine. As long as Betta doesn’t have rabies!”

Everyone laughed except for Amanda, who gave a tight-lipped smile. Then she seemed to notice Lyle, Eli, Aubrey, Yuki, and the twins. “Oh! Please, come sit! Oh… oh dear, we really should have planned for this better… you know what, I’ll go get the lawn chairs!”

“No no, don’t bother! We’ll manage. I think Mako wants down, anyway,” Aubrey assured her.

Amanda looked frantically around her before finally managing to calm herself down. “Very well, then. And you must be…?”

“Aubrey. And this is my girlfriend Yuki.”

Yuki braced Seki against her chest with one arm and raised the other hand in greeting.

“Good to meet you! Good to meet you…” Amanda seemed on the verge of a panic attack.

Four and Yuki took up spots on the floor and let Mako and Seki start toddling around them. Meanwhile, Eli sat on the arm of the sofa right next to Captain, and Lyle gave everyone an almost defiant look before plopping down right on Eli’s lap.

“Wow Eli, thanks for the up-close view of your ass,” Captain murmured.

“No, thank you! That’s the first time you’ve ever complimented my ass before.”

Captain gave a clearly forced smile.

They got along fine with Eli nowadays, but they couldn’t completely ignore the small part of them that got nervous every time they were around Eli, or even Lyle. It just dug up too many old memories.

The group got to asking about the twins, and how one of the hardest times was right after they start walking because you have to chase them around everywhere, and Jeane said something about how lucky Aubrey and Yuki were to be young and agile. Aubrey seemed to relax more after that.

“You seem awfully quiet. Yuki, isn’t it?” Atlas said eventually, holding eye contact with the Octoling.

Noticing his stare, Yuki signed I’m deaf with one hand, sort of dismissively.

Aubrey nudged her and explained, “Yuki is deaf.”

“Oh, my sister is deaf, so I know some of the local sign! Um…” Robert then signed something Captain didn’t recognize, probably in Inkopolis Signed Vernacular.

“Um…” Aubrey began, also clearly not recognizing it.

Japen. Japen! Japenese Sign Language! Yuki signed to her fervently.

“Oh, we use… uh… Japenese Sign Language, since Yuki is originally from Japen. It’s… an obscure local dialect.”

Yuki signed something else Captain didn’t recognize, looking a bit less confident with the hand movements, and Yuki and Robert conversed for a few minutes.

About two hours had passed since the Meer-Hannons and Kekoa-Johnsons’ arrival when the doorbell rang again, and this time it really was just pizza. Everyone gathered around the kitchen counter, where Amanda was frantically trying to set out plates and plasticware. “Okay everyone, if you want a drink, write your name on your cup with this Sharkie, and be sure to put it back when—” But the rest of Amanda’s words were drowned out by the commotion.

Captain hung back a ways away from they’d had the the first chance crowd, figuring they’d let everything die down before going to get their food. Eight waited with them, and a moment later his hand slipped into their hand. “Doing okay?” he whispered.

“Yeah. I think so. I wasn’t expecting to see Lyle and all of them.”

“Yeah, that was a bit of a surprise! Is it okay that they’re here?”

“Of course! Of course it’s okay that they’re here. It’s nice to see everyone.”

Eight met Captain’s eyes, and he didn’t look away until he seemed satisfied with Captain’s reassurance. “You can always step away if you need to, I’ll cover for you.”

“Thanks.”

They shared a smile. “Pizza?”

“Sure.”

Everyone huddled in the kitchen, making use of any chair, barstool, or—in Mako, Seki, and Eli’s case—lap that they could find, while Captain and Eight leaned against the kitchen counter, putting as much distance between themselves and the commotion as they could. Captain nodded in Eli and Lyle’s direction and scoffed. “How are they so confident? Lyle didn’t figure out he’s gay until like five years after I did. And Eli took even longer!”

“Yeah, but it went over a lot better for them. They don’t have the same trauma. And besides, it’s Lyle and Eli. Did you really expect anything different?”

Eight reached an arm around them and gently pulled them in closer.

“Merry Squidmas, Capa.”

After a glance to make sure no one was watching them, Eight gave Captain a quick kiss.

“Merry Squidmas, Eight.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That was followed by Koi opening some presents from her family and sharing some hugs with her parents.

Finally, Amanda announced that it was time for the gift exchange. They all gathered in the living room again, with Tsuku, Koi, Betta, René, Cody, Ava, Kate, and Aaron sitting in a circle on the floor near the tree. Each held a gift wrapped in colorful paper, ranging in size from the wallet-sized rectangle Tsuku was holding to a box as tall as Betta. Captain found themself staring at each of the wrapped gifts, as if staring hard enough would allow them to bore through the wrappings and see their contents.

Who had drawn Tsuku’s name weeks ago? What would they have gotten her? What if something went wrong?

Captain somehow missed Amanda’s explanation of how the gift exchange would work and the first few gifts being given. He didn’t even notice what the gifts were, only that Betta was shouting in joy, and everyone was laughing, and everything had suddenly become very, very loud.

Captain made eye contact with Eight, who was already giving him a concerned look. Eight nodded, and Captain got up, trying not to seem too hurried as they made for the bathroom. They sunk to the floor and put their head between their knees, left by themself with their thoughts, and took several deep breaths to try to calm down.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fourteen years ago

Ryland stared listlessly at nothing in particular as the students around him filtered into the classroom and found their seats. He didn’t even notice when someone sat just to his right.

“Hi, Ryland!”

Ryland snapped out of his daze. “Oh, Ophie. Hi.”

Ryland's and Ophelia’s fathers knew each other from work, and Ryland was pretty sure his father was trying to set him up with her, but she had always been nice to him.

She leaned toward him conspiratorially. “Who did you get for your Secret Snowsquid?”

“We’re not supposed to tell,” Ryland said.

Ophie giggled. “That’s the right answer!”

Ophie seemed to be waiting for a certain response, but Ryland had no idea what it could be, or what she had meant from her last exclamation. He just kind of smiled awkwardly at her.

Luckily, a few seconds later, the teacher saved him from having to respond. “Good morning, class. Does everyone have their gift?”

“Yes, Mrs. Ippy,” chorused about a quarter of the students. Most of the others did have gifts; they just weren’t paying attention. “We’re going to be gathering by grade, so everyone find the others in your grade and sit in a circle. First graders, up here by me…”

Ryland automatically tuned out the extraneous information, but by the time he tuned back in, it was too late, and everyone had already started moving. Ryland just followed Ophie back to the corner of the classroom near the door, where they sat on the carpet. About thirty of them gathered around in a circle, out of whom Ryland recognized Billy and his clan—Lyle,

Eli, Clyde, and Blitz. Ryland and Billy made eye contact, and the smirk on Billy’s face turned Ryland’s stomach.

Instead, he scanned the rest of the circle, trying to remember which one Cairo was—that was the name he had drawn a week ago.

“Okay everyone, put your gifts in the middle of the circle. The Class Leader will go first, and then go around the circle one at a time,” Mrs. Ippy called from somewhere far away.

Billy was up in an instant and making his way toward the growing pile of presents.

“Hey! It’s not your turn!” shouted one of the girls—Emily, he thought.

“Hmm, I’m sure the Class Leader doesn’t mind, right?” he glared at Blitz, who quickly shook his head. So Billy sauntered up to the pile and dug around for a while before finally pulling out a package. He tore it open and revealed a box of chocolates. Ryland thought he heard Ophie gasp next to him, but she didn’t say anything.

They continued around the circle, and eventually Ophie tore open her gift to reveal a pack of orange gummy candies. She frowned, probably because she didn’t like orange flavor. She looked at Ryland, and he just shrugged. “I’ll swap with you if I get something you like.”

“Oh. So… you didn’t get me?”

“No, I got Cairo. I don’t know who got you.”

Then Billy’s perpetually whiny voice interrupted them. “C’mon Ryland, that’s enough chit-chat! You’re holding up everyone else.”

Something felt wrong as Ryland got up and walked to the center of the circle. He squirmed as he felt everyone’s eyes on him. The whole room seemed more quiet than it should have been. It felt like it took an eternity to dig through the pile of presents in search of one with his own name.

And there it was: a small box about the size of a pack of playing cards. And for a minute he thought that might be what they were. He went back to his seat and sat down with it, hoping that that would reduce the number or eyes on him, but it was no use. Everyone was staring at him, as if expecting something to happen. Finally, Ryland realized he couldn’t stall any longer, and he slowly began to tear open the package.

But it wasn’t a pack of cards at all.

It was a pack of cigarettes.

It only took Ryland a few seconds before he understood what they meant. He started to shake, staring uncontrollably at the pack of cigarettes in his hand until it fell to the floor with a crash, spilling some of its contents.

Ryland could feel Billy’s triumphant glare on him, and he didn’t dare look up.

“Ryland! Are those cigarettes? Hand them over!” Mrs. Ippy was glaring down at him with her hand outstretched. Ryland shoved the cigarettes back in then grabbed the box and tentatively raised it toward her until she snatched it away. “And what were you doing with these?”

“They’re not mine! Obviously someone gave it to me as their Secret Snowsquid gift. I don’t want them!”

Mrs. Ippy just kept glaring down at him with a suspicious look on her face. Desperate, Ryland looked around and saw Billy staring directly at him with a malicious grin. And he gave Ryland a small nod, as if saying Go on. But Ryland didn’t know what that was supposed to mean, and even if he had there was no way he was letting Billy get away with this.

“Like I said, the person who brought them in the classroom was whoever got me for Secret Snowsquid! It was B—”

“Fine, then I’ll go check the lists,” Mrs. Ippy said, spinning on her heel and always making it halfway back across the classroom before Ryland could finish. Ryland looked to Ophie for comfort, but she looked just as nervous as he was.

A moment later, Mrs. Ippy was back, this time holding a clipboard. All she said was, “Ophie, I’ll be accompanying you to the principal’s office. You’re being expelled.”

Ryland was barely able to put any words together as he stared at Ophie. “No! No, it was… wait… Ophie? It wasn’t you, right?”

But Ophie was already standing. “It’s okay Ryland, don’t fight it or we’ll just both end up expelled.”

“Wait… Ophie…”

“I’m sorry, Ryland. I hope I see you again.”

But he never did.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Captain groaned and slowly pulled his hand back from his head as the memory finished playing.

Of course, that night he had remembered Ophie’s gasp and had realized that the chocolates had been for him, which of course meant that Billy had swapped out the gifts—perhaps just the tags. But Ophie had already been expelled, and who would have believed him, anyway? Ophie had been right. Mrs. Ippy had already been suspicious enough of Ryland, and Billy hadn’t left any traceable evidence. Ryland probably would have been expelled, too, if he had tried anything.

But maybe that would have been for the best.

Captain pushed themself back up into an upright position and took a deep breath.

Tsuku’s gift exchange wouldn’t be like Ryland’s. She was surrounded by good friends and responsible adults. Tsuku may have a secret just like Ryland had, but maybe Captain could muster the optimism to believe that, unlike Ryland, Tsuku would be accepted.

Captain’s hand rested on the door handle. Yes. Everything would be okay. They truly believed it.

And they pushed the door open. A few strides, and they were back in the living room. It was still chaos, but the smiles on everyone’s faces reassured them. Especially Eight’s.

They sat down next to their husband, and Tsuku ran up to them almost immediately. “Look, Fufu! Look what Koi got me!”

Tsuku was bouncing around with such excited energy that Captain couldn’t discern the object in her hands until they reached out and held the corner to steady it. It was a sketchbook, and on the cover… a silhouette of an octopus.

“Oh… that’s great, Tsuku…” Captain tried to muster enthusiasm in their response, but they just couldn’t stop staring at the octopus emblazoned on the front.

“What is it?” Tsuku finally asked.

“Tsuku… does Koi know you’re an Octoling?”

Tsuku looked at him curiously, almost confused. “Yeah, of course! All of them do. They’ve known for a while.”

Captain looked around the room at everyone, beginning to question his original impressions of each of them. “And their parents…?”

Tsuku nodded. “As far as I can tell. It’s not really a big deal.”

Captain suddenly pulled in Tsuku for a tight hug, and they were holding back tears. “I’m so glad you found them. I’m… so happy for you, Koko.”

Tsuku started pulling back after a moment, and Captain realized that they might have hugged her for too long. But she still had a big smile on her face. “I love you, Fufu. Merry Squidmas!”

“I love you too. Merry Squidmas.”

They shared one more smile.

“Now go have fun with your friends!”

Captain watched them all for a few minutes, seeing René blush as Tsuku asked whether he liked the Tableturf cards she had gotten him, seeing KJ make a remark that they all laughed at, seeing Cody wow them by doing tricks with his new yo-yo, and seeing Tsuku wrap Koi up in another hug.

“You did this, you know,” Eight said, leaning into Captain. “I mean, Tsuku deserves some credit, and I guess I was there, too. But you made all this possible.”

Eight was right, wasn’t he? Nothing could ever be perfect and easy, but Tsuku was never going to have to endure the hardships that they had.

They had broken the cycle.

“Yeah. I did it.”

[fumifooms]

i saw your post about mickbell and rin and i wonder what you think about mickbell x chilchuck?

Mickrin has gotten too real tbh I’m planning a new long af meta post for them… As for mickchuck… Eh it’s a fine and fun ship, I haven’t gotten the angle/manifesto yet though. They have a lot of comedic potential and I do love their mini arc in the background in canon of Mick thinking he’s a self-important greedy asshole, meeting him and getting protected by him, talking it out and he ends up implicitly joining the half-foot union~ But I don’t think they actually mesh well. Being foils to each other though there’s inherently a lot that could be played with tho. I really like this small Mick & Chil comparison thread on poverty for example

What tips the scale in favor of them getting along? They both like to joke and good cheer, like when Mick tells jokes and funny anecdotes to his party at a tavern in a daydream hour extra. They couldn’t drink together much though because Mick has no alcohol tolerance and gets sleepy fast, see the alcohol chart. I could totally see a scenario where Chil peer pressures him to drink in his evil little schemes to have a laugh at the expense of others though that’d be a fun fic I bet. Also they’re both able to be serious when it counts, I could see them being coworkers and it not being horribly, they’re both careful with money too so that helps. In canon they were able to grow to a spot where they got along decent.

Ok and what in favor of them not getting along? Oh god they would butt heads so so much. They’re both very proud people but in different ways for opposite reasons. Mick doesn’t like to be bossed around or when people have like, for a lack of a better phrasing too much morals lol, like when Kabru said they wouldn’t steal the corpse retrievers’ money. Meanwhile Chilchuck hating not being on the right side of the law and looking down on half-foots who like, ~demean themselves and give a bad reputation to half-foots while doing so~ like pretending to be kids for scams is a whooole thing and important to his character. Like mentioned earlier they took very different proached to poverty and just as I don’t think Mick would apologize for having had to do crime it’s convictions that are deepseated for Chilchuck and partly built on a foundation of trauma and defense mechanism, wanting to be a model minority and shifting blame ykyk. I think Chil saving Mick gained him a lot of points in Mick’s esteem but I do think mutual respect would be a bumpy road with these two, though I can see it. What I do struggle with though is seeing them fall in love or working out in a romantic relationship.

There’s a lot but honestly the age gap doesn’t do it favors for me at all, I do think it’d influence their relationship platonic or otherwise, I have trouble not seeing the mentor angle but Mick could vehemently reject it which could even the fields out I suppose hmm. Because Mick’s deal is clinging onto power imbalance in relationships bc it makes him feel safer, because he’s broke and unlovable and obvi if someone has the opportunity to they’ll leave him behind etc etc, idk I think for him it’s best in a romantic relationship to be as even as possible, though this is a nebulous statement. I think he’s a bit hyperaware/hypervigilant when it comes to power dynamics, subconsciously, both bc he has to be careful with those as someone from a vulnerable class in vulnerable circumstances but also because that’s the oense he sees relationships through as well, if there’s an age or maturity imbalance I do think he’d latch onto that, wether really being comforted and dependent on Chilchuck’s "I’ll take care of everything" side or being put off by his air of importance because he has an aversion to authority. I dooo like that Chilchuck is very confrontational about others’ flaws because I think Mick needs that, but I also think Chilchuck is too proud and singeing to drive the points home well hm, too personal and impersonal at once. I’ll give it this thoughhh Mick having an intense fear of abandonment that turns his relationship abusive meanwhile Chilchuck’s wife left him? Oh hohoho tasty. Especially since I do think part of Chilchuck’s situation was neglecting his wife’s feelings and taking her for granted, borderline dismissive of her worries and being generally averse to analyze his or his family’s flaws… Two guys, sitting in a tree clinging onto people in diametrically opposed ways crying about their most important person leaving them. I do like for Mick when getting into a relationship is a way to cope with the Too Much fear and posssessiveness and everything he feels with Kuro, expanding on his social circle in the most convoluted ill advised way gdbdg. I just knowww mickchuck would be hella toxic but if someone writes a fic where they get somewhere good earnestly that’d be so interesting, just very shaky grounds but like I can see slivers of it in my mind it’d be dope.

But yeah like, would they balance each other well? Hmm. I def think Chil could teach a lot to Mick about relationships and emotional maturity but he’s not exactly great at either feelings or relationships as well yk lmaoo, and I don’t really think it’s mutual in that, I guess Mick could call Chil out on his pride but I don’t think he’d really change Chil for the better in his own right you know. Part of why I think there’s an imbalance also I guess. In every way Chil just has More and they don’t really know each other/what’s best for each other esp since they don’t really earnestly see each other in canon idk idk am I making sense. Chil’s not good at seeing others’ perspectives and he’s not really sensitive in general even when talking about topics where he should be, I think it’s a coin flip if he even tries or not depending on the situation.

Obligatory "How does Kuro fit into this Mickbell ship" but I think- How possessive Kuro gets in canon is up in the air bc we don’t work off a lot, I do think Kuro might get scared if Mick gets very close to Chil because he’s also worried about getting separated from Mick. The union leader? The union Mickbell alwayss told him he couldn’t join because they’d take Kuro away from him? They wouldn’t agree to them being together they would steal him etc etc? I see a lot of ground for him being antsy. Ohh yeah I forgot to mention it earlier but I def think Chilchuck would be horrified at the Mick & Kuro situation and be quick to be very vocal about it. It’s mister working rights advocate it’s mister "you’re sick in the head Laios" idk that’s an explosion waiting to happen I think. Ok but where I actually wanted to get to is that I love in Mick ships when Kuro is very happy because "Mick’s making friends!! He’s such an anxious child but he’s opening up to the world again aw yay" super supportive because of the Kuro extra comic with Kabru haha, even then there’s def ground for conflicted feelings, but yes I think it’s fun when Kuro is the emotional support very supportive of the relationship and happy of "Mickbell’s growth" meanwhile the relationship could be radioactively toxic but he doesn’t notice bc 1) toxic relationships is what he’s used to and he doesn’t notice it’s off 2) Mickbell is an angel who could do no wrong.

Also a note: I’ve been thinking of making a translation psa about it but Chilchuck’s type for blondes is specific to the golden type, bc in japanese the word was kinpatsu 金髪, which yes is used to refer to many shades but literally translates as ~gold hair~ and from what we see in canon it does seem to be specific to the golden shade, especially since Falin’s hair is infamously described as light brown (shown in picture below) so dirty blonde doesn’t quite cut it bc of different cultural conceptions of colors. Which, yk, it’s anyone’s choice what they want this to mean for their ship, wether it’s still a "close enough" and gets Mickbell pretty points or if it sparks nothing idk. Yk me though I think it’s so romantic when someone’s in love with someone who’s not their ideal type it’s so <3

What I’d love to see for them ship or otherwise is- They both live in Kahka Brud, Chilchuck opens a general store post-canon, Mickbell opens a variety store post-canon… Business rivals when. The potential for sitcom shojo shenanigans is immense

So yes yes, interesting ship, lots to work with there, idk if they’d make each other better or worse but it’d be an entertaining trainwreck at the very least I’m sure. If it wasn’t clear my fave angle for them is prob the bonding over poverty trauma, I bet you dan do a lot of fun shojo plots and enemies to lovers energy and whatnot. Hopefully this was good food for thought idk I love Chilchuck I love Mickbell now I need to see them duel to the death. Their "I am not a person who can be loved for a very long time" swagger 💔

[chayannecraft]

hey the last drawing will probably be uploaded tomorrow!! i know you'll understand but i've been very busy today :)

anyway i'm curious about if the other eggs have any sort of role in your au??

OH and if you want to talk abt what chayanne and phil's relationship is like, i've been very curious about that lol bc it seems like phil's both very protective of him and doesn't care about him that much. not saying you haven't thought it out i'm just eager to look more into his character!

Hello!! Yeah no I understand I’ve been super busy too. Finals season and everythang. It’s a curse. Oh my god. (Which is why im so late answering this ask hello omg!!!) But anyways yes hello oh my god questions!!!! 💖💖💖!!!!! YES!!! I WILL ANSWER

The other eggs have very loose roles but they do exist!! They sort of take up the space of the descendants-of-the-champions roles that Sidon and the others fill (although I’m not sure who is who at the moment, would have to think about that a little more!!) (I have no idea what role Tallulah plays, but I think she might be traveling around with Wilbur, more info on that later) but sometimes they’re also just like, normal random kids. They are all friends I promise. I don’t have a lot on them though so this is not that coherent.

CHAYANNE AND PHIL. WOUGH BOY. THIS IS A LONG ONE

You were right in that Phil is very protective of Chayanne!! I think a part of him knew Chayanne was The Chosen Hero, but when faced with the decision to send him off to what very well could have been his sons death, if not horrific trauma he was like um. No lol. Not doing that.

A consequence of the storyline in general is Phil isn’t very mentioned a lot, so it gives off the idea that he’s uncaring towards Chayanne, but I promise you that’s not the case!! (Not to make fun of you or call you out of course). Phil is actually very loving towards his son, and was devastated when he ran away with the Master Sword.

Then (for reasons I haven’t thought up yet) he’s pretty distracted but desperately trying to get his kid back. Until the calamity happens and they fail. Then he’s under the impression his son is just dead and he’s in mourning for the next 100 years (Why is he still alive in 100 years, you ask! Well! I took everything from these kids and I think taking their parents is a little bit too cruel so everybody is blessed by some sort of god that expands their lifespan a couple hundred ok :D!!!)

And then a little bit after botw someone goes to Philza and is like hey. The hero is back. He’s hanging out with Princess Pomme. He looks a lot like the missing hero from 100 years ago. Your son. Might be your son Phil. And Phil basically takes 3 seconds to process this before clawing himself up from his depression and being like OK. WE’RE GONNA GO GET HIM!!! AND IF ANYBODY TRIES TO STOP ME IM MAULING THEM. Of course he gets to hyrule RIGHT as totk plot starts and Chayanne goes missing so kind of an L BUT THEY DO REUNITE!!!

They get their moments. They also get a really tearful reunion where Chayanne is like dad im so sorry for running off oh my god :( I forgot you for a hundred years you must be so upset with me. And Philza is hugging him like oh my god my kid is ok. Oh my god. YOU’RE GROUNDED FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE WHAT THE FUCK. And then just caries him around. And probably has some sort of beef with Missa because that’s Chayanne’s Hyrule-Dad. Meanwhile Pomme stands in the back ready to kill him if he makes one wrong move.

There’s a side story kind of sequel relating to that where Pomme and Chayanne have to grapple with the fact that Chay is also a prince and his dad misses him dearly and wants him to come home but they don’t want to be separated ever for the rest of their lives. Maybe even some parent bonding. Like a little family-person drama to contrast the cursed-destiny-supernatural-calamity drama and probably some Death Family Bonding.

[why-am-i-here-someone-save-me]

This is the same anon who had birthday Idia come home on a single pull after failing to get him with the free keys lol, but for some reason I always have the worst luck pulling for Vil's SSRs, which sucks because he's my favorite character ;-; the only SSR of him I have is his Halloween card, and even then he refused to come home until I hit 100 summons and was guaranteed to get him, I really had to work for him lol

Meanwhile birthday Azul, Ruggie, and Ortho all came home with the free keys—

Okay so I did this mostly about Ruggie & Azul since ya know. Ortho is bby. Anyways! Onto the request! *cracks knuckles*

*looks at results*

…shit am I… am I a Ruggie simp and just didn’t even know?

In deep

(Azul x Reader x Ruggie) Ft. Unrequitedlove!Vil

You knew from the second you caught sight of Vil at the orientation ceremony you were screwed. Like one moment you were being threatened by a fiery weasel-cat thing, then they’re was a bunch of people in black robes and just as you mentally resigned yourself to being ritualizly sacrificed by some sort of cult- oh.

Oh my.

Oh my.

Is that an angel? Surely it had to be right? No way a human being could be that drop dead gorgeous, right?

Yeah you were pretty much done for at that moment. You were, as Lila would say in a comedicly over the top impression of an elderly man ‘down bad, as the younguns say.’

Unfortunately it seemed that your fascination was one sided. Your clear admiration for him was no secret to Vil. He was a celebrity after all, he had hundreds of thousands of fans, it’s not like one more of them was too surprising. He kept his interactions with you brief and polite, but he’d be denying it if he claimed he didn’t enjoy the slight ego boost he’d get from crossing paths with you.

But just how you were too busy simping admiring Vil, you had managed to aquire a few admirers yourself, not that you’d realized this.

The first one to fall prey to your charms had been none other that the local jack of all trades, the master of oddjobs and questionably acquired goods himself; Ruggie Buuchi.

Ruggie hadn’t really paid you much mind in the beginning. You were just the strange magicless person who’d been staying in the old dorm building, and not much else. He’d marked you as a potential target in the future, thinking your more kind demeanor would make you easy pickings. And so, like the scavenging hyena he was, Ruggie started scoping you out. He didn’t like what he found. It was too much like back home, seeing the way you barely scraped by on what few groceries you could afford and haphazardly trying to cover the worst of the holes in the old buildings’s walls, they way your cheeks where just barely sunken, something that most wouldn’t have noticed. Ruggie did. He was all to familiar with the suffering that you were going through. Perhaps it was because you reminded him of the kids he’d known back in the slums, but Ruggie’s usually oh so selfish heart began to bleed for you. And then came the tournament. He tried to not focus on the fact that he was getting other students hurt, but at the same time, when he locked eyes with you, he’d known at that second, you knew. You knew it was him behind the injuries, and the guilt that he had struggled to fight off multiples.

It wasn’t until Leona’s overblot that he realized just how much he cared for you. When Leona’s unique magic had begun to turn his body to sand, it was you, little magicless you, who had all but charged at the Prince in anger. The hyena’s eyes widened as he watched you punch Leona, THE Leona Kingscholar, in the jaw. To protect him. For his sake.

It was that moment when Ruggie realized, “oh shit. I’m in deeper than I thought.” Because Ruggie knew he liked you. But it wasn’t until that moment he recognized that that little “liking you” thing had somehow become a “loving you” thing.

From that point on, he went out of his way to do little things to aid you, and needless to they rest of his dormmates were left stunned. Ruggie didn’t do ANYTHING for free: there was ALWAYS a catch with the hyena, but for you? Ruggie would be more than happy to lend you a hand without asking a single thing from you in turn.

In fact, it hadn’t been Leona who invited you to take refuge in Savannaclaw when Azul took Ramshackle from you, rather it’d been Ruggie who had smuggled you in, unable to bear the thought of you having no place to go. It was too familiar, too much like the kids back home in the slums, he couldn’t bear it. When Leona had found out, he’d barely even got a word in before Ruggie pleaded to let you stay until you could get Ramshackle back. The prince’s eyes had widened at the sheer desperation in his dormmate’ voice, and as bitter as Leona could be when he wanted to, he couldn’t force you to leave. Not when you had nowhere else to go, and certainly not when Ruggie had been so quick to defend you. Ruggie wouldn’t have admitted it, but a part of him, that part of him that was selfish and greedy and thought of only himself, was a bit bummed when the ordeal with Azul was settled and you returned to Ramshackle. Man, there goes his perfect excuse for being so doting on you! Which had been “Well since your staying with us in Savannahclaw for now, that makes you one of my dormmates! And what kind of upperclassmen would I be if I didn’t look out for my dorm’s little newbies, huh?” Always followed by that iconic laugh of his. You never pointed out that said treatment did not in fact, apply to Jack, who was the one who was actually one of his underclassmen. The selfish part of him almost wished you hadn’t managed to break your contract with Azul.

Speaking of which, Azul had also kept an eye on you from your first meeting. At first it was purely because he had hoped to rope you into some sort of agreement with him, but the more he’d observed the more interesting you seemed to get. It was maddening. And then the tweels had found out about his little soft spot for you and things had gotten infinitely worse. When you’d first come storming into Monstro Lounge, he couldn’t even approach you without getting awkward, so he’d had to take a moment to compose himself. Needless to say the tweels had been very amused. Much to his annoyance. He doesn’t remember much about what happened during his overblot, but what he does remember was waking up from it to the sight of your worried expression. If he weren’t so emotionally drained at the time, he’s almost certain he’d have died on the spot of embarrassment. You had just sighed in relief when he stirred, helping him up to his feet and asking if he was hurt anywhere. It was such genuine care, such sincere kindness that he was left stunned. No one at NRC was kind, not without their own motives. But there you were, so kind, so patient. He could hardly concentrate thanks to all the unfamiliar and intrusive thoughts running around his mind. After you’d left, the octomer spent a considerable amount of time sorting out his feelings. The conclusion he reached was that somehow, someway, you’d managed to find a way past his walls and endear yourself to him. This realization left him nervous to say the least. Even still, he decided that he’d try to form a bond with you. Hopefully he could do this without embarrassing himself too much…

Needless to say, both Ruggie and Azul were pretty smitten with you. So as the days got colder and the leaves began to fall, they two had decided to make a move on their feelings.

“Ah, Prefect, I was wondering if you would like to join Octavinelle’s theme this Halloween. Since Ramshackle has no costumes, we’re more than willing to have you join us for the night. Holidays are always more fun with the company of friends after all.”

“Heya [Name]! Wanna match costumes with Savannaclaw? We’re doing a pirate theme! It’ll be fun, not to mention the fancy gems on the outfits! Aw come on what’s that look for? I wouldn’t dream of pocketing a few shinies prefect, you wound me with your accusations~!”

Hmm…

Now how exactly are you supposed to explain you’d agreed with Vil’s invitation to dress up alongside the rest of Pomefiore this year…..

[lonesomedreamer]

SNW Liveblog: “Among the Lotus Eaters”

In which they’re mean to Spock for no reason, but Spock helps save the day anyway.

In its own way, this is scene just as staged/cheesy as anything in TOS…it’s also giving NBC Hannibal (not a compliment from me).

Look: I just don’t care about the supposedly corrupt bureaucracy and chain of command in Starfleet. When I watch Trek, I want to escape into a post-scarcity utopian society, and nuTrek can pry that out of my cold, dead hands!!!

Other things I don’t care about: Pike’s on-again, off-again relationship with Batel. Sorry. This show already has too many characters vying for screentime with too few episodes to develop them to be wasting time on this.

Love that Pike makes sure to put out the candles before he leaves…meanwhile his quarters has a huge, open fireplace that burns 24/7.

Not that everything they do on the Enterprise isn’t science-related, but… “science specialist”? Do you guys even WATCH the show??? Gold is for the command division, red is for operations/engineering, and BLUE IS FOR SCIENCE! At least pretend to give a shit about your show’s own universe. (Oh…wait…)

“Most of the time I fly the ship, which is cool, but can get boring.” Speaking for all the kids (and adults!) who have fantasized about flying the Enterprise for the last 55 years: kindly fuck off.

“Can’t you just say ‘two moons’?” / “We get it, Spock.” Spock is the science officer (and ALSO Vulcan). Get off his back!!! His SNW crewmates nitpick him worse than Bones ever did.

I don’t like Ortegas much—she’s still written like garbage, no fault of the actor—and her perpetual bitchiness towards Spock is NOT helping.

“Doctors love being tasked for a mission because of their combat skills.” Maybe you should’ve thought of that three episodes ago when you were LARPing Wolverine in slo-mo against the Klingons for like ten minutes, M’Benga…

This line might have been okay by itself—McCoy-esque, if you will—except they’ve been giving Spock shit for Doing His Damn Job for the entire episode so far.

I love Christine, and SNW!Christine has grown on me, but…she’s not even the Head Nurse on this show. Why is she running Sickbay solo? Am I supposed to believe that the Enterprise doesn’t staff more than a single doctor??

“As long as it stays isolated to Uhura” Since they don’t know the cause and therefore whether the condition is infectious, shouldn’t they at least isolate Uhura? (They experienced a similar outbreak just a few episodes ago!!!)

Speaking of Uhura, seems pretty shitty of the writers to have Uhura be the first one to lose her memory: TOS already did that. (If it’s an homage, it’s not a good one.)

I adore Ethan, but sometimes his line delivery is weirdly stilted.

:')

There’s literally no one else left on the Bridge apart from Spock and Ortegas? Okay…

“It’s not the Spock show!” but it should be.

Whatever’s affecting the rest of the crew should affect Spock differently and/or belatedly due to his different genetic code. Then again, the only thing these writers seem to know about Vulcans is that they talk about logic a lot.

Not the computer having a ghost-of-Mufasa moment with Ortegas… (“Remember who you are.”)

“I feel like I know how to do this. And I’m the only one who can.” * Put a pin in this.

“Abso-friggin’-lutely.” Awful.

I didn’t think you can block a phaser blast with like...a physical shield?? Especially one (presumably) set to kill???

Kirk was involved in a lot of fights, but watching the captain of the Enterprise repeatedly kick/pistol-whip a guy who’s already laying prone on the ground is…surreal and horrible.

Trek’s always been two parts morality play, one part scifi, but can I get the scientific part of the reveal again? Something about radiation from an asteroid?? It sounds kind of interesting—but they’re just gonna gloss over it, aren’t they??

Also, the Enterprise is designed to protect its crew against all kinds of radiation—we know that because it was built to fly in SPACE, which is radioactive as fuck. So what’s special about these asteroids (and if the planet’s atmosphere is too thick to be penetrated by the Enterprise’s scanners, why can’t it protect the planet from the radiation coming off the asteroids that surround it)??

Please stop showing Pike punching this guy over and over again. It’s actually upsetting, I can’t see the point, if there is one.

Pike: “[Rigel VII] shows us who we really are…” Pike 30 seconds earlier: kicking and punching an unarmed man who’s sprawled out, bleeding, on the floor Pike: “The lives of my crew mean everything to me.”

sure-jan.gif

Look…TOS could be really unsubtle and on-the-nose about its messaging. It still did it with so much more grace and flair than THIS. “He was right. Not having a past…it can be nice for a while.” “I know what you mean. But maybe some memories are worth the pain of others.” / “The story of your life, the details…they matter!” Wow, what do you guys think is this episode trying to say?!?

*“No one but you could pull this off.” In “Mirror Mirror,” a visibly nervous Uhura hesitates after Kirk issues his orders; he then reassures her by earnestly saying “You’re the only one who can do it.” It’s meaningful because it’s true—Uhura is the only one both with the necessary skills and whom Kirk can trust in the mirror universe. Here, it’s just Pike stroking the ego of an officer who’s already an arrogant smartass…plus, while Ortegas might be the best pilot on board, the episode repeatedly makes it clear that she is NOT the only one qualified to “fly the ship.”

“I don’t blame Spock. He’s still got a lot to learn.” Why the fuck would anyone blame Spock for anything that went down here?!! The man was trying to analyze the asteroids—the very same ones that robbed everyone of their memories—at the beginning of the episode when everyone was rolling their eyes and saying “not now, Spock,” and look where it fucking got them!

And in the very next line, we learn that Spock came up with the solution that SAVED THE SHIP/CREW.

“It feels logical to me.” This is the kind of shit y’all should be angry about re: Spock, not him smooching Christine. It FEELS logical. Retch.

I know I sound really critical here, but I actually found this one a lot easier to watch (almost) straight-through than some of the previous episodes, i.e., without having to stop and scream in frustration. It was less mundane and plodding than the previous one (and left SNW!Kirk behind, thank God). That said, I did find myself tempted to fast-forward through some of the scenes on Rigel VII, and I did skip around during the Pike/Batel scenes. I also saw a lot of comments that this episode is very TOS...I guess so? Imo the resemblance is surface-level only, though.

The Good: Hey, they're on a STRANGE NEW-(to-the-viewer) WORLD! Imagine that! — La'an's costume and the way she's styled for the away mission. — Boring subplot aside, Batel also looks really nice. — The vibe, planetside, is trying to be like TOS. Gold star for effort? — A few funny lines. — Ethan gets a lot of flattering shots in this episode. :3

The Bad: A lot of time wasted between Ortegas' repeated “I fly the ship” mantra (both early and later on) and the Pike/Batel scenes that bookend the episode. — Almost everyone being critical of what Spock says and how he says it; it borders on unprofessional and mean and is ESPECIALLY bad since Spock then uses science to restore their memories (off-screen, of course). — Making Uhura the first one to get amnesia. — Failing to develop Ortegas at all in what I assume is supposed to be an “Ortegas episode.” — Christine's hair. My poor girl! — Spock forgets how to READ?!?? (I missed this while I was watching because it's just Too Stupid for me to believe they actually went there.) — Gratuitous violence from Pike that seemed to serve no thematic or symbolic purpose.

There better be Spockstine in the next one, because without it, Ethan’s face is still worth it…barely, though.

[rorotoru]

you’ve trapped me in coroika punkrock hell and now i need to know ur hcs/scenarios abt it

Losing my mind (positive),,,, Thank you so much for this ask. I hope you'll enjoy your time in PunkRock hell

I like that Clams and Rider have a lot in common but are opposites in ways as well. They’re both “tSuNdErE” edgelords But one is an (aggressively) good kid who would decline but thank you for your friendly offers and the other would curbstomp you if you get in his way (AKA he would actively push you away). Anger is both their main expression But one is very expressive in general while the other has a resting bitch face. They’re both goth But one is more specifically punk. They both visibly obsessively train on that RISE & GRIND💪😤‼️ routine But One mains a lightweight weapon covering the ground in ink while the other Murders with a heavy weapon. 

Sidenote: I like to defend heavy mains on my team as an Aerospray cuz they tend to get targeted often and can’t react quick enough to flankers. They can go on a Splatting spree while I cover the floor and stack up victory points. If I slapped these two idiots on this scenario this strat would be in-character for Clams since a big part of his team’s shtick is them having each other’s backs. I also like the “mutually protective” element there.

Neither of them seem to be the type to be very vocal about love. So a romantic relationship would be extremely awkward at first. Clim could give a smooch and Ride goes “bro that’s gay” and Clammy’s like “THAT’S THE POINT YOU IDIOT”. And then they don’t make eye contact for a week. Or Raider could literally just smile and Clambert faints and dies. They are very bad at this. But they will get better and open up more (when alone).

Hilariously enough I like to imagine that the relationship evolves the same way my feelings towards the pair did overtime. At first I thought nothing of it then I was all like “mmm edgy squids” as a joke but bro... I don’t think it’s a joke anymore. At first they’d see each other strictly as rivals. I can see mutual respect with Rider being ranked S+ which Clams would likely aspire to be. And Clams valuing teamwork and trust is something Rider needed a whole character arc to learn and likely still needs to improve. They would realize they have a lot in common they can agree on and bond over. And a Good rivalry would encourage them to work even harder and learn from each other. From there I guess it gets sus. But it’d take a while for them to admit how they feel to themselves, let alone to each other.

Which brings me to one issue... Neither of them would be the type to make advances. If any progress is made it’d likely be accidental. Maybe one of them gets caught listening to Splatoonified MCR and the other goes “Yo is that Splatoonified MCR” and both of them in their heads go “This mf is Not straight”. They’d require some scenario pushing them to open up and maybe non-verbally confess otherwise they’ll just keep it to themselves.

Sidenote: I also like PartyPunk (Aloha & Clams) so in my stupid little head Aloha would play a wingman-type role as someone who is much more comfortable with that kinda thing as opposed to the other two Cowards. But this is not about PartyPunkRock so that’s for another time.

Speaking of scenarios. I'm a sucker for the Tending to Wounds scenario. They can battle (for no reason) until Rider gets wounded and Clams abruptly cuts the battle like “OH NO I AM SO SORRY”. Rider goes “Naw I’m good come at me bro” and Clams is like “WTF NO?” Cut to Clamlet tending to Ridr’s wounds switching between apologizing repeatedly for causing the wound and scolding him for disregarding his own injuries. Meanwhile Riddlr is just sitting there slightly embarassed like “bruh I can do this myself”.

Another one I had in mind for a while but I don’t want to spoil too much cuz I wanted to make it a proper art post. But remember when Rider wore a sick knight costume. He’s not very knightly character-wise but it looked cool. Clams however would fit the role perfectly. What if they were both rocking the knight drip... That is all I will say.

I think that’s all for me. Thank you for reading my excessive neurodivergent infodumping. Below is an embarrassing doodle as a treat. I am very touched others like my unusual pairing :)

[bigskydreaming]

Like, I would kill for a story where post-Court of Owls reveal, once he learns about them and their plans for Dick, Bruce becomes OBSESSED with conducting a secret, off-the-books investigation he doesn’t tell any of the Batfam about.....where he’s like, committed to unearthing every single member of the Court no matter what, just so he knows for sure who they ARE, that he can identify them as an enemy. Because he’s like, Bruce, so he can’t help but feel guilt-ridden that there was this whole epic threat to Dick the ENTIRE TIME he was raising Dick, and Bruce never had a clue....and the only way Bruce can feel Dick is safe, that he can feel he’s ‘made up for not somehow sensing this threat’ like he should have just somehow KNOWN....is for Bruce to be able to be confident he’s ferreted out every last member, and even if he can’t expose them publicly, at least he’ll KNOW that they’re not safe for Dick to be around.

But he can’t just like, TELL his family what he’s doing, oh no. Then he’d have to have The Feelings talk about how guilty he feels and why, and whether he should, and they’d be all like ‘B, you’re being ridiculous, you can’t be responsible for just not knowing everything’ and he’d have to be all like HAHAHA BET? And then they’d make it about his EGO and his pride and he’d be like omg no, this is about Dick’s SAFETY, DUH, and all of that just sounds exhausting and would take away from Important ‘Could Be Making My Son Safer’ Time, so its best to just skip all that by lying to his family and keeping secrets from them, even the one he’s specifically trying to protect with all this.

Like. Its just Logical, honestly.

Why so many people in his life hate Logic, Bruce will never understand. But that’s a problem for another day.

BUT.

MEANWHILE.

The irony is that Dick Grayson is absolutely his father’s son, so the whole time Bruce has been conducting his own top secret investigation entitled UNEARTH EVERY LAST ONE OF THE FUCK FERRETS WHO THINKS THEY’RE GONNA WINTER SOLDIER MY KID, Dick’s conducting his OWN identical investigation for the exact same reasons.....he just has to know who they are, y’know? For his own peace of mind. He’ll never feel safe or comfortable at another gala - and he can’t just, avoid them for the rest of his life, not without putting distance between himself and his family that he’s not willing to do, ESPECIALLY not BECAUSE of some douchebag fuck ferrets like the Court of A-Holes......like, he’ll never feel okay at one of those events again unless he can be sure he at least KNOWS who to stay away from, who to watch his back around.

And then Bruce and Dick stumble across each other in the midst of their ongoing, parallel investigations, and they make like that meme of the two Spider-Mans pointing at each other like WHO ARE YOU AND WHY ARE YOU HERE DRESSED THE SAME WAY AND DOING THE SAME THING AS ME, HOW DARE, I’M AN ORIGINAL.

And then like, the rest of the Batfam peeks out from where they’re hiding behind the curtains or under the desk in one of the Owls’ super secret hidden office, and everyone’s like haha wow, weird, fancy seeing you guys all here. We’re definitely not all doing the same thing for the exact same reasons, that would be so weird. It might imply that despite our epic dysfunction, we’re actually like, an actual family of like-minded individuals who all care about each other and are uncannily in sync when we’re not busy yelling about how we’re totally different and would never be like our siblings or parent ever, on account of they’re the worst.

[artistfingers]

There’s one ~silver lining~ of my iPad being broken: I’ve had loads of time to think about my many half-formed undercover phantom au ideas! Since I have no idea when or what will make it to comic form, here’s the lowdown…. AKA, everything that’s been rattling around my brain recently :P

For context: Danny, Sam and Tucker have never met, and nobody knows Danny is Phantom. When Vlad’s newest bit of tech gets Danny stuck in ghost mode (with the rest of his powers on the fritz to boot), he meets Tucker and Sam—who instantly see through his disguise and lend a helping hand. (Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4!!)

So. After that, Danny—no, Phantom—becomes friends with them. It’s exciting! He was invisible at school even before the ghost powers; he was pretty isolated and lonely and being Phantom for the last year hasn’t exactly been a social boon. Kid’s lonely, ok?

But now… two human friends? Who’re his age & share his interests? It’s like a dream come true! If only they weren’t exclusively friends with his ghost self… and if only they didn’t wanna be so involved in his dangerous ghost hunting things…Uhhh. Hm. Could be a problem.

Danny angsts about the danger he’s putting his new friends in, and about not being able to befriend them as a human. He plays with the idea of telling them Everything but that’s… risky to say the least. He’s only known them a few weeks! ugh….!! it’s too much. maybe he should just throw the towel in.

Buuut Sam & Tucker don’t take no for an answer. Especially after they rescue him a third time.

Thus… Phantom friendship shenanigans!!

Sam filched some parts from the Fentonworks Lab when Phantom took them there, and later convinced Tucker to help her build a custom mini ectogun in case of emergency. They didn’t tell Phantom.

Danny is really sentimental about that DP hat he wore when he first met Sam & Tucker. He wore it as Phantom for a while but it got singed in a fight. He still wears it when he hangs out with Tucker & Sam but otherwise keeps it squirreled away for Sentimental Reasons.

“So Phantom, how old are you?” “I’m 15.” “15 now? Or 15 when you died?” “Yes.”

Tucker has a bunch of awful 90s button up shirts, and gives one to Phantom

They aren’t able to convince Sam to wear one too, but they sure do try.

Phantom won’t tell them when he died, so once he starts wearing 90s shirts they start using terrible 90s slang with him

“I am NOT from the 90s!!! They didn’t even SAY that then!!!” “methinks the lady doth protest too much…..home slice” “NOOO!!!”

“Phantom I have an extremely important question. Like, life or death. SHIT is on the LINE here. Are you listening?? I really need to know…. Do ghosts play video games”

The answer may surprise you (no it won’t)

Sam is completely convinced they can ACTUALLY get a good working guess of when Phantom lived and died based on the fact he liked Nasty Burger when he was alive, since NB’s a regional chain with a not-so-distant past. Tucker meanwhile thinks Phantom probably has a good reason for keeping them at arm’s length—but regardless of method, they can agree: they want to break down Phantom’s walls.

The next arc is less “Undercover Phantom” and more “Undercover Fenton” because the juxtaposition of him having to do hidden identities squared (squared again) is too good for me to pass up. It boils down to this: during a ghost attack at school, Danny finds himself stuck being “protected” by Sam and Tucker.

Sam and Tucker take their new jobs as Phantom’s ghost hunting companions too seriously to let this skinny stranger they just met run TOWARDS the danger. WHY does he keep trying to run TOWARDS the danger

NO YOU CANNOT GO TO THE BATHROOM THE SCHOOL IS ON G H O S T L O C K D O W N

Sam pulls out her ectogun.

Danny: WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?!

Sam does not tell him.

“Wait, your last name’s Fenton? Like Fentonworks Fenton?” “No, the other Fenton.” “Oh… well, that’s too bad…” “YES LIKE FENTONWORKS FENTON”

Sam is initially wary of Danny because of his parents’ super strong anti-ecto views. Danny is clueless as to why she isn’t very friendly to him-as-a-human when she’s great with him-as-a-ghost. but she warms up after he helps resolve the ghost issue in a way that shows he doesn’t subscribe to his parents’ views.

afterwards you get this excellent situation where Danny is now friends with Sam and Tucker as Phantom and as Fenton, and they’re not connecting the dots as quickly as they did when it was just “that’s Phantom wearing a hoodie and a cap with his own logo on it”.

the potential here? *chefs kiss* here’s a few things but honestly? the possibilities are limitless

Danny pretending to not have a cell phone because he already gave them his number as Phantom

Tucker: *dials Phantom*

Danny, standing directly next to him: *frantically attempting to silence his phone*

Sam & Tucker try to introduce Danny and Phantom. Danny has to make excuses to avoid this happening in both forms.

Danny takes Sam & Tucker down to the Fentonworks Lab to get them some real equipment. Sam & Tucker pretend (very badly) that they’ve never been there before

Rooftop chill sessions as Phantom, late night teenage hijinks as Fenton, plus school AND fighting ghosts does not do any favors for Danny’s sleep deprivation. Tucker introduces him to caffeine pills with… mixed results.

Tucker and Sam teach Phantom some sign language. Later Danny slips up and uses it casually with them as Fenton

…. And many other silly mixups that I’ve yet to think of because I live for that shit

Sam & Tucker have theories about the Fenton-Phantom connection and they’re all wrong but somehow also plausible and that freaks Danny out just a little bit if he ever overhears them

Ultimately, I see this AU having a final arc where a New Situation occurs in which Danny-as-Phantom has to—once again—pretend to be human. This time, he’s with Sam & Tucker as Phantom from the get go, and can’t disappear or transform, even if being Phantom is extremely dangerous at that moment. Somehow this scenario would lead to the Fenton-is-Phantom (or, in this case, Phantom-is-Fenton) reveal…. But the details still escape me :P

so in short………… I really like hidden identities

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

Hi! How are you?

I was thinking about what exactly should I ask you and then it hit me!

The Obey me! Brothers and Side Characters meeting Mc's older sibling (you can keep it gn if you want), Y/N, for the first time.

Just imagine:

Y/N, unlike MC, knew a bit about their supernatural bloodline and tried to learn more about magic and the other realms even managing, during Mc's absence, to work with an angel (maybe Gabriel or even Michael himself) .

One day they ask Gabriel/Michael if he knew where their younger sibling was because it had been more than a year since they last heard from them and when the angel told them, Y/N asked immediately to teach them a spell to reach MC, ya know, to see if everything was okay and if those demons were treating them like they should.

That same day they teleported themselves in the Devildom. Right on the student council's room's table during a meeting with the exchange students and the bros. They looked like they wanted to commit a coup but when they made eye contact with MC, Y/N jumped into their arms, making both of them fall on their asses. MC would have a lot of explanations to give...as well as Y/N

(MC: "Bruh WHERE THE HELL DID YOU COME FROM?! AND HOW?!?!"

Y/N: "Lmao I asked my good dude Gabe/Mike to give me a way to reach you and ya know archangels do know their shit and-"

MC: "Wait... ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT THE ARCHANGEL GABRIEL/MICHAEL?! YOU MANAGED TO REACH AN ARCHANGEL JUST TO COME AND SEE ME?!"

Y/N: ". . . yeah? Why are you so surprised? I'd literally drop kick God AND the Demon King's asses to protect you, MC. I mean, I'm your big sibling, that's literally my job since you were born.")

Honestly I think Y/N would probably adopt Luke after two seconds like:

Luke: Hi, I'm Luke I-

Y/N: Oh, Hi! I know who you are! The archangel talked a lot about you!

Luke: R-really?!

Y/N: Yes little one! I heard MC is like your older sibling or something?

Luke, blushing: W-well I really appreciate their company b-but...!

Y/N, patting his shoulder: Well, welcome to the family Luke! Mc's younger brothers are also my younger brothers, so if you need anything don't be afraid to ask me!

Also, I think Y/N would become the love interest of the now dateables (except Luke ofc), the demon bros have MC and Diavolo, Barbie, Solo and Simeon have Y/N.

Furthermore if Y/N finds out about how their little sibling was treated before the pacts and 'lesson 16' . . . well I hope that Beelzebub can hide Belphie faster than he can eat and that Lucifer can apologise harder than he can punish Mammon

And speaking of Mammon! Y/N would probably love him (platonically)

Y/N: You where the first one to approach my sibling in a friendly way? Who was in charge of protecting them and who never left their side? You were their first pact, is that correct?

Mammon, intimidated: y-yes! I'm their first!

His brothers: for the love of Diavolo, stop saying that!

Y/N, not minding them: Good. Thank you, Lord Mammon.

Mammon: W-what? I- I mean of course you would thank the Great MAMMON!!!

Y/N, smiling: yeah, you really are Great. I'm glad you are their first.

Mammon, tearing up: MC, can I adopt your older sibling-

Sorry if I wrote too much! If I did something wrong or if for any reason you don't feel like doing this, feel free to ignore it! I hope you have a wonderful day!

-💀

HAHAHA YES I LOVE THIS

IM SORRY BUT I KEEP IMAGINING Y/N SAYING THE DROP KICKING PART IN FRONT OF DIAVOLO AND HIM JUST BEING LIKE "......👀”

Okay so I did this as more as just as just some random blurbs if thats okay

I feel like at first Barbatos will have beef with Y/N because of the drop kicking comment and sees them as like a threat

But Diavolo becomes INVESTED in Y/N because they’re so bold and works with the archangels

No one has ever dared to say something like that before and yet you did

He’s like, hmmmm. I like them teehee

meanwhile Lucifer is like, “You have GOT to be kidding me, MC.”

Luke absolutely loves Y/N and sees her as a big sister

definitely does sibling shenanigans

Mammon also loves Y/N because she doesn’t talk down to him

Y/N and Mammon become big buddies because they’re thankful that they’ve never tried to kill M/C unlike some demons

I feel like Y/N, Beel, and Asmo would also all get along really nicely 

Y/N for sure gives major attitude to Lucifer. Purposely tries to make his life harder. Lucifer will have to be like, “M/C can you please do something.”

Belphie has to actively stay away from Y/N because even if M/C has forgiven him, Y/N has not

I feel like Y/N would prefer for M/C to hang around with the other exchange students but won’t fight them when they choose to stick around the demon bros

Now on to the romance aspect, I feel like Simeon is definitely up there on the charts since Y/N studied under the high ranking angels

Solomon would also be putting on the moves because he likes how chaotic they are. Also to have studied under the archangels would most likely mean that y/n is probably pretty powerful which intrigues him

Diavolo is absolutely fascinated by y/n. They’re so bold and blunt. He loves it

He wants to know everything about them

Barbs takes some time warming up to them. He doesn’t trust them. I mean they did say they would fight god and the demon king soooo

But he eventually warms up after he sees that y/n just wants to protect m/c

[forestlingincorporated]

I wanna talk about Janet Drake

I’m not against exaggeratedly evil versions of Tim’s parents, tbh. It’s fanfiction, if we can depict an Exaggeratedly Good version of Bruce (which we can, and I do, and I love) then we can depict the Drakes as Exaggeratedly Bad. As someone who personally identifies with Tim, and his brand of complicated parental abuse in particular, I find it cathartic to uncomplicate that abuse and rescue him from the Obviously Evil Bad People. 

That said, since much of comics lore is passed down word of mouth, the oral tradition surrounding Tim has developed this idea of Janet as The Worse Parent between her and Jack that was never really present in the comics. We see much LESS of Janet, and we have 20 years worth of comics depicting Jack as a neglectful hotheaded idiot who ultimate does love his son. More importantly, Jack isn’t very much LIKE Tim, so there is a habit to attribute Tim’s traits to his mother... and, as someone who really really identifies with Tim, Tim has... some negative traits. Tim can be a bitch sometimes. He’s fiercely intelligent and sweet and kind, with a strong sense of justice, but he can be cold and judgmental and unthinking - he fights those traits, but he does have them. 

And it is perfectly fine to depict Janet that way. I’ve enjoyed depictions of Cold Calculating Janet Drake, but it’s not the ONLY option, and I want to challenge fans to consider different avenues. Tim could pick up these traits from anywhere: a nanny, Mrs. Mc Ilvaine (”Mrs. Mac”), a teacher, tv, Sherlock Holmes novels, Bruce Wayne himself. Tim is capable of not being like EITHER parent. 

So, what do we KNOW about Janet? (I’ll also touch on Jack, but only in scenes he appears with Janet.) 

When Janet was first introduced she was depicted as a gentle but “modern” woman. This was written in 1989, told by a 13 year old Tim, so this theoretically was meant to take place in 1979. I’m not here to give a lecture on the history of sex discrimination in the united states, but much of the legislation protecting women in the workforce or surrounding women’s bodily autonomy would have been very very new in this initial depiction. 

Here, Janet is shown to be encouraging, emotional, maternal, and projects her own feelings onto Tim. Jack is shown to be slightly sexist, possibly discouraging, but not overbearing. And the artist is shown not to know how to draw children. 

To insert some speculation, I think it’s important to note all the Drakes witnessed a terrible murder/accident that day. I point this out, because this is the last time Jack and Janet are depicted this way. It’s possible they changed as a result of this event specifically. 

However, this is also a story being told by Tim. It’s also possible these events aren’t really “real” at all, and Tim is misremembering what his parents were like as a three-year-old, possibly projecting a more palatable version of his parents into the narrative. This is entirely up to personal interpretation. 

In fact, the Drakes are shown in Legend of the Dark Knight attending Haly’s Circus, and the artist knows what a toddler looks like and they’re depicted as already having a slightly strained relationship. Jack is clearly on the defensive, and Janet seems to be passive-aggressive, though she could just be attempting to explain the situation to her toddler honestly. The intended tone isn’t especially clear. 

I do want to point out, in this depiction, Tim isn’t being carried like he was in the previous one. He’s walking ahead of his parents, which isn’t a terrible horrible crime, but could be dangerous in a crowded place like the circus. Might be a subtle hint to his parents overall neglect. 

Back to A Lonely Place of Dying, in Tim’s memories of the night he discovered Robin and Dick Grayson were the same person at nine-years-old, his parents are home, and watching TV together while Tim played... trucks, idk, in the living room with them. (This is semi-interesting, because you could say “oh, Tim liked vehicle toys as a kid” or you could extrapolate that this is another subtle indication of Jack’s sexism, providing Tim with appropriately “boy toys.” Either interpretation is valid. If Tim was assigned female at birth, would they have been given “girl toys,” or allowed to play with whatever they wanted?) 

This is, to my knowledge, the only panel of the Drakes when Tim is between ages 3 and 13. They’re all together, which might indicate that the Drakes were home more often when Tim was 9, only later going on business trips when Tim was “old enough” but... 

This is Tim’s boarding school when he’s 13. While most boarding schools in the US are for grades 9-12, Tim is clearly not a freshman at age 13; look how much younger the other kids in this panel are. In the US, the youngest you can attend most boarding schools is 7. 

That means Tim could have begun going to boarding school anytime between 7 and 13. He most likely spent all of middle school in boarding school, at least. There are an almost infinite number of possible ways the Drakes handled having a business that required lots of international travel, an archeology hobby, AND a very young child. Janet staying home until Tim was 7, 11, 13, is equally possible as the Drakes having a nanny until 7, 11, 13. Tim just doesn’t talk about that period of his life very much.

(”What about Mrs. Mac?” - it is unclear when Mrs. Mac begins working for the Drakes. We only see her when Jack comes out of his coma. She could either be a long standing staff member, or a recent hire.) 

Note: I’ve seen it said that it’s canon that “According to Tim, when his parents were home, they made a point to try and include him in their activities, bringing him along to events that were normally adults only.” I have never seen this panel, or I don’t remember it, so I cannot confirm, but I also cannot debunk this because... comics. 

By the time Tim is 13, Jack and Janet are away on business trips a lot, with limited communication, and no firm return date. If I’m feeling generous, I’d say it was harder to communicate internationally in 1990 than it is today. If I’m not feeling generous, I’d say the Drakes are extremely wealthy, and international communication was easier than ever before in the 80s and 90s. They’re not even going home to see Tim in a week or two, they’re going home and calling Tim at boarding school in a week or two. 

Even Bruce thinks its weird, though he doesn’t say so to Tim’s face. It’s written almost as if Tim’s parents’ neglect was meant to be a plot point that just got forgotten about. 

Tim’s parents are fighting at this point (their poor assistant), but Janet still goes with Jack on these business trips. And she’s clearly involved in the business, somehow, but the comics never SAY what Janet’s JOB is. We’re told Jack is the exec, but Janet is ONLY ever referred to as Jack’s wife, though they’re later described as the “heads” of the company, plural. 

Just to be clear, this is Jack’s business. There’s a perception that Jack is a bad business man because he and Janet fight over company decisions, and Jack looses the business after Janet dies, but Jack looses the company YEARS after Janet dies, and maintains it for about a year after No Man’s Land at that. We’re not told how Jack looses the business, but he’s got to be doing something right. Janet isn’t necessarily the “real brains” of Drake Industries. 

And I’m not... gonna... touch the... exploitation and racism because... I’m not qualified to do that. But, here’s the panel. The Drakes sure seem exploitative and racist in their business decisions. Someone else can... analyze that with more nuance. 

Regardless how how long they’ve been fighting, when their lives are in danger, the Drakes fall back into a loving husband and wife. Their marriage may be falling apart, but they do care about each other. 

I want to show these panels because it shows that Tim and Jack do have things in common. They’re both level headed in a crisis and can be somewhat cold in their practicality. Janet meanwhile and silent. Jack is later willing rant and rave at their captors, but Janet remains silent. 

That is, until they’re alone, and she finally lets herself fall apart. 

God, Jack can be obnoxious. Janet just looks miserable and resigned. I actually think Tim takes after his parents in this respect in equal measure. Tim can have a temper, but he can also be fairly melancholy and defeatist. 

Jack keeps reminding Janet to be strong and in control, which could be period typical sexism? But Jack seems so practiced and ready with the words of encouragement, and with Tim’s history with depression, I wonder if Janet has an inclination towards it as well. 

As the end approaches, when Jack brings up Tim, Janet seems to have a lot of regret. She talks about “wasting” the good things, and I don’t think it’s too big of a stretch to assume she’s talking about time spent with her only child. 

From this point on, Janet is at times spoken of, but not seen. Like here, when Jack says Janet wouldn’t approve of him and Tim being so “far apart.” He says this after he tells him he takes back his threat to send him back to boarding school, which might imply Janet was against the idea of boarding school? Though she obviously lost that argument when she was alive. 

Jack will of course renege on this later, but that’s Jack Drake for you. 

Or here in Tim’s illness induced dream, where he gets everything he wants. Though, since this is a fantasy of Tim’s, where his father and girlfriend are both more accepting and understanding than they are in real life, I would take this depiction of Janet with a grain of salt. 

After loosing Drake Industries, Jack thinks about Janet (though, they call her Catherine/Cathy for some fucking reason) during his depressive episode. And... uh... 

Hallucinates a Valkyrie???? Is this symbolic of suicidal thoughts, or is she... real? Or is he seriously hallucinating? 

Anyway, we’re not here to discuss Jack’s mental state, the fact that he forgot Tim’s birthday, or that concerning “I was going to knock some sense into you but you’re still bigger than me” statement from Tim, we’re here to talk about Janet. And even though this entire arc is about Jack mourning his first wife, they don’t SAY anything about Janet herself at all. I mean, they don’t even get her name right, so I guess what was I expecting. 

Then there’s Origins and Omens, which also doesn’t say anything about Janet, except that Tim’s memory of her is faulty - Janet was poisoned, her assistant Jeremy’s throat was slit on television, but Tim seems to have conflated the death he did see with the death he didn’t. 

The only piece of canon to suggest that Janet might be cold, is Tim compares her to Thalia. And even then, he’s really just saying Janet was protective of him. It’s kind of a scary look to make at your kid, but Bruce does the same thing, so. 

I do want to say... it’s not 100% clear if Tim is even talking about Janet. He could be talking about Dana. Dana was observably protective of Tim, though I don’t think he’s ever called her mom. He PROBABLY means Janet. 

And finally we have Tim visiting his mother’s grave (in a duel Christian/Jewish cemetery, make of that what you will), where Tim says she was “a little religious.”

And that’s it! That is all we know about Janet Drake in New Earth. Hardly the Mom From Hell, but she isn’t perfect. I’d be interested in seeing some alternate depictions of her within the fandom. 

I’m still gonna eat up Terrible Parents From Hell like a starving puppy dog, though. Just some food for creative thought. 

[incorrectsmashbrosquotes]

Another Metroid Dread

== Warning: Some spoilers ahead ==

*After being knocked unconscious during her first encounter with Raven Beak, Samus awakens to find Link offering her a hand*

Samus: I told you not to follow me.

Link: Samus, I keep telling you; you don’t have to do this stuff alone anymore.

Samus: Link, you don’t understand. If the X really still exists on this planet, I may not be able to protect you.

Link: This “X”, they’re like viruses, right? Giant oversized primary-colored viruses?

Samus: Yes?

*Link pulls some of Dr. Mario’s pills out of his pocket*

Link: I think I’ll be fine.

Samus: If that actually works I am going to be pissed.

Link: You KNOW it’s going to work for exactly that reason.

Samus: … shit, you’re right.

Samus: Well, at least it’s just you. I can trust you to handle yourself. If the kids had followed me I probably would have had to shoot them myself.

*Meanwhile, watching from the monitors on Samus’ ship:*

Junior: Okay … now is probably not the best time to reveal that we stowawayed.

*The other kids nod in agreement*

—————————————–

*after getting lost for a long time, the Smash kids find themselves in a large lava-filled chamber, when the notice an imposing figure chained against the wall*

Kraid: KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARAAH!!!

Kids: *hugging each other* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!

Junior: Uncle Kraid? Is that you?

Ness: Wuh … that thing is your uncle?!

Junior: Not my literal uncle, no. But he and my dad have been friends since the 80s. He gets invited to a lot of family events, so we started calling him Uncle Kraid.

Toon Link: That’s nice? What’s he doing here, chained up in a pool of magma?

Kraid: KYAAARAA! REEEAARAAAH!

Junior: He says he has a timeshare on this planet. He was taking a vacation when he was jumped by a bunch of asshole bird people and locked up in his own sauna.

Ness: Wow, you got all that from a couple roars?

Junior: Come on, help me get these chains off of him.

Blue: *removing the last of the locks* Well, thank god Junior was here to resolve this misunderstanding. For a moment I thought this thing was going to try and eat us.

Junior: Oh, no, he’s DEFINITELY going to try and eat you.

Kids: …

Kraid: KYAAAAAAAAAARGH!!

Junior: Yeah, I suggest you start running.

—————————————–

Samus: GodDAMN these EMMI robots! I am so fed up with running and hiding from these things but they’re so relentless in following us!

Link: Following YOU, you mean. They don’t seem interested in me at all.

Samus: Holy shit, you’re absolutely right! They’re only interested in me because of my metroid DNA! If you went in alone you could probably waltz right past them and head straight to the central unit with no problem.

Link: Sure, but I don’t have the weapons I’d need to shut it down, not to mention wield the Omega Beam.

Samus: Hmm… you’re right. I’ll have to lend you my suit.

Link: Y-your…! I get to wear your suit?!

Samus: *pressing buttons on her arm cannon* Don’t worry, I know you’re a bit on the short side, but the suit conforms to the shape of the user.

Link: S-sure, but … is it just me or is this weirdly the sexiest thing ever.

Samus: Oh, it absolutely is.

—————————————–

*Somewhere deep in the catacombs, a lone squid wriggles out of a crevice*

Blue: *holloring back through the hole* Guys! I made it! My squid form was able to get through!

Ness: That’s great. What do you see?

Blue: Hmm, there’s a giant dome structure of some sort. I don’t think this is the front because I don’t see a door anywhere. But I do see some sort control panel with two large red buttons on it.

Junior: Only two buttons?

Blue: Yeah, they’re labeled. One says “OPEN ElUN SPHERE AND RELEASE X PARASITE THEREBY DOOMING ALL LIFE ON THE PLANET”, and the other says “DROP ELUN SPHERE INTO MAGMA CORE OF THE PLANET THEREBY EXTERMINATING THE LAST OF X PARASITE AND SAVING THE UNIVERSE”.

Toon Link: Those are … some VERY specific labels.

Blue: Soooo, which one do I push?!

*Collective slapping sound of several facepalms is heard*

—————————————–

Link, using the radio in Samus’ suit: Uh, hey babe?

Samus: I read you, something wrong?

Link: Maybe not. I just encountered one of those Chozo bird-people while exploring this EMMI zone. Dumped a bunch of lore on me. Said their name is Quiet Robe.

Samus: Quiet… Oh hell, it’s my Space Mom!

Link: “Oh hell”? Is Space Mom a bad thing?

Samus: That entirely depends on what they do next.

Quiet Robe: …

Link: …

*Quiet Robe pulls out a book*

Quiet Robe: Want to see Sammy’s baby album?

Samus: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFU-

—————————————–

*Later, on Raven Beak’s ship high above the planet surface*

Ridley: *CRASH* YOU SON OF A BITCH!

Raven Beak: Did you just throw yourself through my windshield? Who the hell are you?

Ridley: Oh don’t you pretend to not know who I am! I’m Samus’ greatest nemesis! ME! I’ve been tormenting her for decades now! I literally murdered her family in front of her! You don’t get to come in now at the very end and pretend you were here the whole time!

Raven Beak: Listen, Riddles…

Ridley: RIDLEY!

Raven Beak: Ridley, whatever. You need to get over it. You just need to accept that she’s just not that into murdering you.

Ridley: TAKE THAT BACK YOU WHORE!

—————————————–

*Meanwhile, on a lower deck*

Samus: Yeah, this is the place. I can hear Ridley and Raven bickering upstairs.

Samus, to her radio: Fox, pinpoint target my coordinates. Give me five minutes to clear out.

*Five minutes later, Samus, Link, and Quiet Robe watch from a clifftop a safe distance away as the Great Fox uses its lasers to safely vaporize Raven Beak’s ship from space, taking out both of her enemies*

Samus: You’re right, Link. Working as a team is WAY better.

Link: Watching your enemies get disintegrated by an orbital space laser … is there anything more romantic?

[astaroth1357]

Demonic Pregnancy (But It Makes the MC… Problematic)

Okay, so hear me out. I know the prevailing idea is that a human getting pregnant with a supernatural kid would sap their strength and what not… But what if the opposite happened? So basically, getting pregnant by the brothers would make the MC physically stronger, but more susceptible to their sin… Oh this is going to be fun. 😈

Trigger Warning: Pregnancy

Lucifer

First noticed something was up when the MC came into his office to bring him coffee and casually ripped the door of its hinges… with one hand… by the handle…

He didn’t even have time to be mad about it because he was already frantically texting Diavolo and Barbs that there was something very wrong with the human. They’re not supposed to do that.

Meanwhile MC is in the background marveling at the newly freed door in their hand… They hadn’t even thought about it! Is this what having power is like?? Are they actually dangerous now??? Better not let it go to their head…

*it is totally going to go to their head*

Lucifer learns two things pretty quickly, (1) The human is pregnant with his child and (2) They’ve just been given access to a whole lot of power and they’re mind is set on one thing: Domination.

The next nine months for him are spent practically having to leash the MC or else they’ll go out to pick fights with anything that moves to prove their “superiority”… His brothers and even Diavolo included!

It wouldn’t be so bad if their body wasn’t still very human and very breakable… and also they’re PREGNANT, so please STOP!!

This baby, honestly, could not come fast enough… Good thing demons don’t develop grey hairs… Poor guy…

Mammon

Noticed something was up when they were chatting out at RAD and they dodged a stray ball from Beel. 

They dodged a ball. From Beel. And he throws at, like, Mach 7 speed… And it didn’t even look hard!

… But being the dumbass that he is, he just thought they had gotten a lot better at their magic. It was Lucifer who saw something wasn’t right when the MC was actually holding their own against Mammon and Beel in a race.

Was thrilled by the news at first but then quickly learned that he must have infected them with Greed somehow…

They wouldn’t stop begging for new stuff! Sometimes for him or the baby, but mostly just whatever struck their fancy the second that they saw it.

He’d try to tell them no but then they’d look all sad or whine about hard it was to be pregnant and how they couldn’t do things like tie their shoes or stand for long periods of time or…

(Never mind the fact that they could bench-press Beel if they wanted to, no no, that didn’t matter.)

His nine months were pretty much spent pandering to Lucifer and Levi for more loans to keep his MC happy… and praying they’d snap out of it after the baby finally came because he CANNOT keep paying for their crap…! 😥

Leviathan

MC and Levi playing games in his room and one of their online matches got particularly heated… The MC may or may not be prone to gamer rage, but that night they got so frustrated that they snapped his controller in half like a toothpick…

They were too busy trying to frantically apologize to take notice of their sheer strength, but HE did. And he was thrilled!!

Like, sure, it sucks that he’d have to buy a new controller but that was So. Cool. Their strength was like something out of a shonen!! He was honestly fanboying too hard to question, “Wait a minute, how did they even get that strong??” The MC later went to Lucifer themselves to get it all got sorted out (really Levi was no help whatsoever) and man was he shocked by the news…

Though he was even more shocked by the sudden spike of jealousy that they seemed to exhibit afterward… Like, extreme “You better not leave my sight” level jealousy… 😣

One the one hand, he’s kind of into it because being alone with the MC is all he’s ever wanted!… but on the other hand, dude really wants some space… 

He tolerates the next nine months for three reasons: (1) He does honestly love the MC, (2) Watching them break (other people’s) stuff and fight demons with their bare hands will never stop being cool, and (3) He’s somewhat afraid of what they’d do if he tried to leave so…  😥

Let’s hope the effects are temporary…

Satan

Found out something was wrong when he and the MC went to the park. He saw an old acquaintance of his and left to go say hi but came back to find that the MC had uprooted an entire park bench to squash a nosy lesser demon…

Nothing, absolutely NOTHING, he’d ever read about humans told him that they were capable of that!

Figuring this has some kind of magic origin, he doesn’t bring them to Lucifer but to their resident human sorcerer instead, Solomon…

…and THAT bright idea ended up getting the MC magic tag-along throughout their pregnancy since Solomon wanted to make "a few” observations, the lying bastard… 🙄

Even more unfortunate though, is that the introduction of Wrath into their system also gave the MC an utterly monstrous temper which didn’t help their newfound strength at all…

Poor Satan gets saddled with caring for what amounts to a hair-triggered glass cannon… (though really it’s less protecting them from the world and the world from them 😣).

Needless to say, he’s lost quite a few bookcases over the next several months…

Asmodeus

It was another night with Asmo, so another night out clubbing. He and MC were together for most of the time, but they had left him briefly to get another round of drinks… and somehow got dragging into a straight up brawl in the process.

And they WON…

Asmo brought them right to Lucifer after that. Like, he loves you sweetie, but there were like ten lesser demons there and no way a little human like yourself could pull that off without something being up.

Oh he was overjoyed by the news, but the real test was yet to come… Who would give out first? The Avatar of Lust or a very, very, astronomically horny MC…?

In truth, no one in the House ever wants to talk about what happened for those next nine months ever again… The things they saw… The things they heard… Filthy, filthy things….. 😖

And more broken beds than anyone could care to count…

Let’s just say that they’re all happy the MC was already pregnant, otherwise they’d be dealing with a LOT more demon babies running around… What a hellscape that would be…

Beelzebub

The MC was helping him move some of his weights between rooms. They were only supposed to carry the lighter ones (which really weren’t that light) but they were carrying them so easily that the two got suspicious… They tried to lift one of his heaviest barbells and, to their amazement, they picked it up even easier than he could!

They both just kind of stared at each other for a few seconds before calmly agreeing to go find Lucifer. This probably wasn’t normal…

What pregnancy even was had to be explained to Beel since he doesn’t really understand humans and he only needed one thing confirmed…

So, they’re eating for two now?

And boy did they act like it! The MC’s appetite practically tripled as the months went on and he did his best to keep up for them. He even missed a meal or two for the first time in his life because he was so preoccupied making sure his MC had enough to eat… 😣

Their tastes also got weirder as time went on… At one point they asked for Solomon’s cooking which nearly had him “Nope-ing” out of the relationship right there. He stuck through it to make them happy, but he couldn’t watch them eat it… Even he has his limits, MC… 😟🤢

Wants the baby to come out already if for no other reason than he can finally go back to being the biggest eater of the House again. Having to work around two is a nightmare for everyone…

Belphegor

Would you believe he straight up didn’t know for weeks?

Like, they told him they were pregnant a while ago but all the pregnancy seemed to do was make them really sleepy…

Combine their naps with how often he’s dead to the world and it just never got brought up. 🤷‍♀️

That was until the day it was his turn to vacuum the common room and the MC was resting on the couch…

“MC, can you move? I need to get under there.”

“Hm? Oh, sure. Let me help.”

They then proceeded to get up and lift the couch with one hand like they were Beel or something!

He was, perhaps, slightly miffed that they didn’t think it was necessary to mention they had gotten a butt ton stronger for like a month, but you know…

Belphie has probably the easiest time managing his MC anyway because ALL they want to do is sleep. At most he just has to take on the responsibility to remind them to eat and move around a little.

Lucky bastard always gets off easy… 😖

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 325: Deku VS the Outside of U.A. ~Conclusion~

Previously on BnHA: Ochako was all “dear bloodthirsty mob, this kid you see standing before you has fought harder than anyone and put his life on the line to protect you all, so please chill the fuck out, jesus christ. like, putting aside that he’s humanity’s best hope and so it’s very much in your best interests to let him rest and recover someplace safe so that he can keep fighting for us, are y’all seriously going to turn away an injured and exhausted child in front of his sobbing mother?? seriously?? come on now.” I’m paraphrasing here but that’s basically how it went down. Anyway so then the mob was all, “...” and Deku collapsed to his knees in tears, and Gigantic Fox Lady and Kouta ran over to give him a hug but then the chapter ended.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all “FINE, YOU CAN HUG HIM”, which, was that so hard?? The U.A. Clown Mob is all “come to think of it, we’ve kind of been taking the heroes for granted this entire time, maybe we should be less passive in the future. anyway so Deku if it’s not too much to ask, can you please save everyone and fix everything.” Deku is all “I sure can, and by the way I forgive you for swarming around all menacingly two minutes ago and trying to deny me basic shelter and stuff.” Ectoplasm is all, “hey Todogang get a load of this. [walks in a circle].” Hawks is all, “that’s literally the greatest thing I’ve ever seen.” Rat Principal is all, “anyway so that’s what your students did today, hope you’re enjoying your new *~*ROBOT LEG*~*, Aizawa.” Aizawa is all “[lots of exposition about Kurogiri and for some reason, Toga, while being all brooding and sexy].” All Might is all “[standing here right outside of U.A. doing absolutely nothing and being foreboding AF]” and that immediately sucked away all of the warm fuzzy feelings from the hugs, goddammit.

each new week has become a waiting game of “when will Deku finally get to take a bath so people will actually be willing to go near him and give him the hugs he deserves.” the stakes have never been so compelling. I’ve almost forgotten about AFO entirely

lmaoooooo

me: for the love of god will someone please give Deku a hug before I die of old age

Mineta: YOU GOT IT!! --

Iida: [SWIFTLY CUTS HIM OFF] NOT YOU

fucking losing it at Mineta’s crying face. he really wanted to hug him. I legit feel bad but this is also the funniest thing I have seen all week, omg

somehow Kouta, who last week was only a hand’s breadth away from touching Deku’s head, is now twenty miles away from him in this new chapter

can I make a Loki reference here. is this recap a good place to insert a joke about someone using a TVA time-rewinding device to fuck with my poor boy Kouta over here. well anyway there it is

AND NOW HE’S BACK ALL OF A SUDDEN OMG

(ETA: since when is he “niichan” omg?? can’t handle this cuteness.)

BUT THEY’RE STILL NOT HUGGING HIM FFFFKFFFFF. WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO. WHO DO I HAVE TO BRIBE AND/OR BLACKMAIL

OH NO KOUTA IS CRYING THAT’S IT I’M DONE FOR

“when I heard that lady I knew that I had to go, but then stop again within inches of actually touching you because you smell like week-old rotten onions.” listen Kouta, I’m not saying I don’t get it, but you all can’t keep doing this to me. it’s the way you guys keep teasing it. like, if you’re gonna hug him, hug him. don’t just stand there with your arms held rigidly out in front of you like a molded action figure

OH MY GOSH BUT HE SAID THE THING

KOUTA SWOOPING IN AT THE LAST MINUTE TO TAKE ALL THE CREDIT FOR FIXING DEKU LIKE THAT ONE KID IN THE GROUP PROJECT WHO DOES ABSOLUTELY NOTHING BUT STILL TAGS HIS NAME ONTO THE REPORT ANYWAY, WHAT A KNAVE

GASP

(  ´͈ ᗨ `͈ )

SHE PICKED HIM UP LIKE A LITTLE BABY OMG?? she just leaned right over and lifted this child like he was a small animal. like a lil baby futon that she was about to hang up to dry. oh my god

-- HEY WHAT

(: well that’s extremely fucked up. though sadly not too surprising given what we just saw these past couple chapters

incidentally, I hope that anyone who was legitimately defending the civilians’ perspective earlier takes note here of how quickly that line of thinking -- “we’re just trying to keep our families safe” and all that-- can lead to straight up bigotry. if you’re willing to deny a child shelter and protection simply because he’s not YOUR child, and because you’ve decided based on Internet rumors (no real-world parallels there, I’m sure) that he might present a threat, it’s really not that much further of a leap to discriminating against entire groups of people simply because you perceive those groups as being dangerous. I’m sure the people who turned Gigantic Fox Lady away also told themselves afterwards that they did it to protect their families. “better safe than sorry.” “she’ll be fine, someone will take her in, but as for us, we can’t afford to take that risk.” people can come up with all kinds of justifications for treating other people as less than human, and the really scary thing about it is how fucking easy it is

one last quick side note, which is that Horikoshi does a great job here of showing how scapegoating works, given that AFO is the one who’s really to blame and who presents the actual threat, and yet Deku is the one who ultimately winds up being the target of the mob’s fear and outrage despite him being as much of a victim as they are. gotta love that irony, which unfortunately plays out far too often in the real world as well.

anyway I’ll get off my soapbox now, sorry about that. let us continue

YES, FINALLY OH MY GOD!!!!

AND THAT’S THE STORY OF HOW GIGANTIC FOX LADY BECAME THE GREATEST HERO. PACK IT ALL UP, WE’RE DONE HERE KIDS

holy shit. the real MVP right there. thanks for getting it done champ

jesus christ I have had it up to here with these people

literally the bar is set so low at this point that I’ll go ahead and take it. helping him because it offers them a tactical advantage is at least one step up from not helping him at all

“WHY NOT SHIKETSU” MOTHERFUCKER I SWEAR TO GOD

-- thank you!!

okay this one guy with the antennae hair is having himself a character development speedrun here

-- okay, but this part?? fucking this part, right here??

can we repeat that again?? the part where this guy acknowledges that the problems of hero society were caused not just by said heroes, but also by said society?? the part where he acknowledges that they treated the heroes like celebrities who were putting on a show for them?? the part where he acknowledges that when push came to shove, the vast majority of those heroes, when faced with a situation that offered no reward, were nonetheless willing to put their lives on the line to protect the very same people who then turned around and blamed them rather than thanking them?? are the civilians of BnHA even allowed to have actual deep thoughts about this stuff. holy shit

bro!!

ANTENNAE HAIR GUY SHOVING KOUTA AND GIGANTIC FOX LADY OUT OF THE WAY TO SLAP HIS NAME ONTO THE END CREDITS AS EXECUTIVE PRODUCER. CONGRATULATIONS SON YOU FIGURED OUT THE CORE PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTION AT THE VERY HEART OF THE MANGA. WAY TO GO BUD

meanwhile, on today’s episode of “one more chapter to go till the big volume cliffhanger, how else can I drag things out let’s see”

it’s a panel. of people’s feet. just a bunch of normal feet. with sneakers and shit

this All Might shirt guy is getting more screentime in this arc than 90% of the class 1-A kids

I guess I’m supposed to feel sorry for this dude now that he’s all “if we let you stay here do you promise to somehow magically fix every single problem that we are now currently facing?” those are some ridiculously exacting standards my dude. come on now

KACCHAN SIGHTING

thank fuck I’m not the only one who’s thoroughly unimpressed by absolutely all of this lol. I feel better now. meanwhile Iida and Kouda and Kiri are ready to run over there and hug them all. you guys are way too forgiving. damn you and your pure hearts

anyway so Deku’s like “yeah, definitely”

(ETA: almost forgot to comment on the “I’m no longer alone” part – he basically corrects the guy and says “sorry, but you’ll need to direct that question towards all of us, not just me, because moving forward we’re a team.” good stuff.)

you know what though, all joking aside... fuck yeah. because perfect victory, right. the strongest guys don’t settle for anything less. so I guess Deku has pretty exacting standards himself

also can you all just take a look at this fucking kid who’s got so much light in his eyes now that I’m gonna need eclipse goggles. hot damn. “you’re welcome” says All Might Shirt Guy as he is frantically interviewed by several local news networks asking him how he daringly managed to save Deku all by himself. “well I guess I’ve just never been the kind of guy who can sit back and let a bunch of rabble-rousers blame a little kid for all of humanity’s problems. someone had to step in and take action, you know?”

oH MY GOD THE SCENE IS FINALLY ENDING

don’t let the door hit you on your way out All Might Shirt Guy

but meanwhile, sudden Tododrama action??

oh shit

there are honestly so many ways in which Ochako’s very moving speech could have wildly backfired that I genuinely have no clue where this is headed lol. how exciting!!

so now Horikoshi is once again stalling for time with random filler panels, but this one is 10x better than the shoes lol omg

(1) was Ectoplasm’s jacket always this oversized. (2) did you guys know that if you go back to chapter 319 you can see that Horikoshi gave us a sneak peak at Enji’s Sad Detective disguise and I in fact made a joke about it in the 319 recap not realizing it was actually the stone cold truth. (3) did Shouto deliberately speed up out of impatience because Hawks was walking so fucking slow and he couldn’t take it any longer. (4) and what, I ask you, is up with these dramatic speedlines. so many mysteries here. what a masterpiece

everyone is acting all shocked about something ahh what’s going on

wait what

what the heck. did they just loop around behind everyone. what was the point of that lol. “anyway, so this is what they look like from the back” well okay, thanks for that Ectoplasm

(ETA: so it seems like they were actually hanging out someplace else away from the crowd this whole time, I guess? here I thought they had more faith in Enji’s disguise. I guess Shouto and Hawks don’t particularly want to attract this crowd’s attention themselves right now either, though.)

I am so fucking confused lmao

speaking of All Might WHERE THE FUCK IS HE lol. but yes, good, OFA brings everyone together, and Hawks is very deeply moved about this out of the blue all of a sudden. you know how it is

aw heck yeah now this is another filler panel I can get behind

Mineta really wants that hug, good lord. I genuinely love this actually. Mineta if you could just stay little and cute and keep crying about how much you love your classmates in a non-gross way for the rest of the series I would be so appreciative. you’re doing great

IIDA IS HOLDING DEKU’S HAND THIS IS NOT A DRILL. ONE TIME WASN’T ENOUGH FOR MY MAN HE’S ADDICTED NOW

what did I tell you. Kiri wants to get all of the mob’s autographs now. Kiri you’re a peach

Shouji having a conversation with another mutant type is a very nice touch! we really need to get to his backstory soon. I feel like that casual remark from GFL earlier was kind of hinting at more to come

is this the first time we’ve ever seen the Yaoyorictionary in action?? never forget that Viz tried to call it the “Yaoyorozu Reference Book” because they hate fun

last but not least, KAMIBAKU IS BACK ON THE MENU, FUCK YEAH. Kaminari trying to spice things up and introduce a little bit of controversy by smacking Kacchan on the back of the head for god knows what. I will be deeply disappointed after this if I can’t find at least one person unironically declaring that KamiBaku is now toxic and abusive

lfkdlWLWK TODODRAMA??

oh my god. Shouto’s face. Enji’s face. the back to “oyaji” again. the blunt, not-taking-no-for-an-answer, “I don’t know how much louder the universe can scream at you that doing things alone is not it, so hopefully you got the point” directness of it. fffdlkslj I’m so ready for this Horikoshi please don’t fuck it up my expectations are so high

HOLY FUCK

I SCROLLED DOWN AND HE WAS ALL “( ❛‿❛)” AND I JUST WASN’T FUCKING EXPECTING THAT OKAY. JESUS CHRIST. GIVE ME A SEC

lol okay moment over and now Enji’s pulling his hat down all dramatically like a world-weary Cowboy

OH MY GOD WERE YOU FACETIMING??

AHHHHHHHHH

(ETA: not to put Iida down or anything, but it’s kind of strange that Aizawa is all “the class rep sure did great” when Ochako is the one that was giving that whole big speech for like twenty minutes just now lol.)

(ETA 2: “thank god Iida stepped in just in the nick of time to keep Mineta from hugging Deku.” sorry Mineta I really do like you lately but it’s still low-hanging fruit lol.)

HE LOOKS SO SAD??! HE LOOKS LIKE HEARTBREAK ITSELF??! I AM BESOUGHT WITH THE URGE TO REACH INTO MY SCREEN AND PULL HIM INTO THE SAFETY OF MY ARMS??? MY GOD, AND I THOUGHT DEKU NEEDED HUGS

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH okay I was gonna just hold down the letter H for a full minute and count it out loud but within about ten seconds I realized I needed to chill lol

-- but then again NO, I DON’T NEED TO CHILL, I HAVE ZERO CHILL, ACTUALLY, BECAUSE IT’S AIZAWA WITH A ROBOT LEG AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

COMPLETE WITH ROBOT TOES FOR THAT EXTRA TOUCH OF AUTHENTICITY!! I LIKE HOW HORIKOSHI PUT ALL THIS EXTRA “!!!” EMPHASIS AROUND IT IN CASE WE COULD SOMEHOW POSSIBLY FAIL TO TAKE NOTICE. “REMEMBER, EVERYONE?” SAYS HORIKOSHI HELPFULLY. “REMEMBER THAT TIME AIZAWA CHOPPED OFF HIS OWN LEG?” oh wow now that you mention it we somehow forgot all about that. like who do you take us for

OH NO NOT THE SAD BOYFRIEND ANGST THAT I WAS SECRETLY LOOKING FORWARD TO WITH GLEE

well at least he’s not M.I.A. or back with the villains again like I thought he might be. still, that’s gotta be brutal to know your friend is in there somewhere, but to not be able to reach him again no matter how hard you try. that’s the kind of angst that pays off in final battles just when you most expect it. such is my hope, at any rate

what’s this now??

trying to decide if this is Horikoshi’s way of saying don’t worry about that, or his way of saying definitely worry about that lol

anyway so Aizawa is out here being all irresponsibly handsome once again. when is someone going to do something about him

here for Sexy Robot Leg Eyepatch Aizawa clenching his fists and making speeches about revenge. pretty sure we’re all here for that

WELL, WELL, WELL

IT’S ABOUT FUCKING TIME

I’M VERY GLAD YOU’RE ALIVE AND SEEMINGLY WELL, THOUGH!

BUT WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK THOUGH, ALL MIGHT

ffff. bracing myself for that cliffhanger next week. you’d better not touch one hair on this man’s head Horikoshi. I’m watching you