#and then ofc the coworker that makes me cry all the times sees right through all the fucking facades and says

[depresseddepot]

.

[litaskick]

Hi! Can you do a dating edge includes imagine?

i am TERRIBLE at headcanons i feel like, but i’ll try for you anon

my requests are open, request here - who i write for - request rules -  Edge Master List

summary: a collection of headcanons if you were dating the rated R superstar

Dating Edge Includes....

- let me just start off by saying that he ADORES you omg

- literally so in love with you

- absolutely whipped

- would actually do anything for you

- you are his favorite human (sorry christian)

- he always has a hand on you somehow

- adam will literally always find a way to touch you or just hold you

- always holding your hand, keeping an arm around your waist or shoulders, or holding you in his lap if he's sitting down

- adam also loves kissing you, ofc

- he isn't picky, he loves all the kisses, soft kisses, peppering kisses all over your face, rough kisses, or just making out

- he's called the rated r superstar for a reason, so you guys definitely enjoy and have fun with the sex

- adam is your biggest cheerleader, your #1 fan

- he is just so supportive of you

- he is very affectionate if you couldn't already tell

- if you were out with an injury, he would feel TERRIBLE leaving you back at home

- he will constantly worry about you the entire time

- you can count on adam to call you at least 3 times a day if you were out with injury

- literally gives the best hugs, they’re just so comforting

- cuddling is a must, he is all about the cuddles

- honestly, i could see him not sleeping good if you weren't cuddling him

- just because he's so used to it

- double dates with christian and his girlfriend

- when you two were younger he just dreamed of the day you two would get married

- pretty much since the beginning of your relationship he just knew that you were the one

- when you two do finally get married he is so emotional omg

- adam 100% cries when he sees you walking down the aisle

- like everything was about to become real, you were actually going to get married

- and once it was official, you remember that being the happiest you had ever seen him

- you two were just in absolute bliss

- you guys ARE the wrestling it couple

- and you have been for years

- literally the wrestling community's favorite couple

- at the beginning of your relationship you guys would sneak around

- adam didn't want to admit to christian that he was right about his crush on you

- eventually christian found out anyways though and told adam that he told him so

- when he was forced to retire, you retired just a few months after him

- you almost felt guilty to keep wrestling while he sat at home with a messed up neck watching you on the tv

- you also just worried about him being home alone without some one there 24/7, his mom would come in and help him out, but she would just stay for a few hours and leave

- when you went on raw to perform your retirement speech, adam still had no clue that you were retiring, you didn't really know how to tell him

- after you were done and trying to get back to your dressing room to call him, you kept getting stopped by all you coworkers, the women crying and telling you how much they would miss you, and the guys giving you a pat on the back or a hug and asking you why, to which you responded "My husband comes first."

- When you finally did get back to the locker room, you had dozens of missed calls from him, and few text telling you to call him

- of course you called him and he picked up before the first ring could even go through

- adam was just frantic "why are you retiring?", "you never told me about this" , "you don't have to do this because of me"

- you calmly just told him to relax "you come first adam, you always will. i love wrestling and i've had such a good career for the past 13 years but i just can't do it anymore, not without you here too. it just doesn't feel right, not with the thought of you sitting at home having to watch it all knowing that you can never come back again." you explained

- the phone call ended with you both in tears, adam stating that "i'm ok with you retiring if that's what you want to do, but i feel guilty about it." and you just stating "please don't feel guilty about it, honey. this is my decision. i'll be home tomorrow, i love you."

- when you finally got home the next morning and saw him, you could just tell that he was up all night thinking about it

- you went over and hugged him and you said "it's ok, it isn't your fault."

- it took him a few months to accept it fully, he secretly still had so much guilt over it though, but he let it go

- retirement life ended up being pretty good

- it took adam awhile to recollect himself after his neck injury, but after he did, he got right back on track

- he got roles in shows and movies, meanwhile you still did a few side things for wwe

- like training upcoming talent, doing commentary for PPVs, even helping write some stuff out for the creative department

- when adam returns to wwe, you are extremely nervous

- you would not be able to forgive yourself if he hurt himself out there

- but you watched him train his ass off and even helped him train, so you felt a little better about it

- but the nerves that hit you as you watched him get back in a ring and wrestle on a monitor in the gorilla were insane

- your hands were shaky for sure

- and you couldn’t help but silently cry, it was a mix of nerves and joy

- the obvious reason for the nerves

- but as for the joy, you were so happy seeing him back out there

- you knew how bad he had wanted this

- and you knew how much wrestling meant to him

- when he came back through the curtain you felt like you could finally breathe again

- he immediately came over to you

- adam knew how nervous you were about his return

- he pulled you into one of the tightest hugs 

- when he pulled away he wiped away your tears

- “i’m ok” 

- “i know you are, i was just worried”

- and then he pulled you into a hug again, this one lasting longer

- when he pulled away this time he gave you a kiss

- “i’m proud of you”

- but ANYWAYS

- i got carried away with the return thing

- BUT

- being his girlfriend is amazing though

- 10/10 would recommend

[sukiglycerin]

13 minutes || katsuki bakugou.

* pairing: pro-hero (therefore aged up)!katsuki bakugou x fem manager!reader

* genre: pro-hero!au, smut, this is the longest warning section i’ve ever written, mainly pwp, fluff at the end :>

* words: 2,266 of all this fiLTH

* warnings: AGED UP KATSUKI, ugh tumblr deleted my super long tags so now i must redo them, this is very long & filthy, whew let's go, dom!katsuki, sub!reader, semi-public sex, exhibitionism, slight voyeurism, office sex, reader is bent over the desk ofc, master/sir kink, a little pet play (he calls reader pet/kitten), dirty talk, degradation, fingering, breast/nipple play, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, orgasm denial (how contradicting), cunnilingus (f receiving), cum eating (both ends), talks of safeword/colour system but no actual usage, penetrative sex, unprotected sex (pls use protection irl!!), creampie, reader is kinda masochistic, pussy slapping, crying sex (no angst here tho), hair-pulling (m receiving if it matters), implied subspace, aftercare !! the best part !!

* a/n: so tumblr messed up sO much while i tried to post this, so i hope you like this! ty @toishi for sticking with me and all of my ramblings while writing this! (and ofc @dylanxmin for her lovely support!!) this is a VERY spicy thing, and almost had actual plot before i cut it out. if you like this, i may do a fluffier pt 2!! enjoy!

being a pro-hero's manager has its perks. the pay's good, the coworkers are pleasant, and travelling is pretty fun. to you, the best part is that you get to see your boyfriend of three years every day.

you've been dating pro-hero ground zero secretly, and you happen to be his manager. honestly, the latter came first in chronological order, but that doesn't matter anyway.

you first encountered ground zero (or as he was called back then, katsuki bakugou) during your time in the business course at ua. he bumped into you quite ungracefully, cursed at you, pushed past you, then let a startled but apologetic kirishima to apologize. it was fate, in kirishima's words. 

such fate led you to manage ground zero five years ago, after slowly climbing your way up from managing smaller heroes to finally reaching the popular ones. bakugou had been the only popular hero with a manager opening; you learned why soon after being hired.

the spiky haired hero had a short fuse and a tendency to cuss. he was picky, indecent, and often reckless with his public image; the calmest you'd ever seen him was when he blew up villains and screaming "die."

however, things change - things change a lot. five years later, you're here: katsuki mumbling sweet things into the crook of your neck as his hands tease the waistband of your pencil skirt.

"katsuki, we can't- you have a meeting in fift- hng-!"

his lips find yours quickly, effectively quieting you down. you're sitting on katsuki's desk - a polished cherry wood thing that took too many weeks to find - as he towers above you, pinning you to your spot.

katsuki pauses, and pulls back, licking his lips. "sounds like a you problem."

"we really can't, this meeting is really important-" bakugou's fingers nimbly find their way under your skirt, deadly close to your panties. he really isn’t paying attention to you.

"and i'm the star of the show, the number one pro-hero-" if he hears you mutter 'that's midoriya,' he ignores you and continues, "-aren't i the most important one here?" his fingers rub your clothed clit, smirking at your audible gasp.

"k-katsuki, no-" you know he can feel the wet patch growing on your panties; from the way his determined eyes lock on yours, you know he won't be finished until you are too.

"how long do we have now, love?”

"thirteen minutes, but-"

"you're going to cum for me three times in the thirteen minutes we have."

it's not a question; it's a fact. you are going to cum three times in the next fifteen minutes.

“once on my fingers,” he puts a finger up, “once on my tongue,” another finger, “and once on my cock. the only thing you have to worry your pretty head about-“ he leans in close to your ear, voice dropping a couple octaves, “-is keeping quiet enough.”

his fingers push your panties to the side with ease and play teasingly with your wet folds. he circles your clit with his middle finger slowly, dragging out each languid movement with a smirk on his face. you flush at the lewd, wet noises he elicits from your pussy. you know that his fingers are coated in your arousal.

you look down in embarrassment, gripping the edge of the desk, and stare at the cotton material of your pencil skirt.

"slut." the word is spat from katsuki's mouth. his hand holds your chin; his touch barely ghosts your skin, but the command still exudes dominance. he tips his hand up, so you're looking into his intense eyes.

"look at me, slut." the word is emphasized by the plunging of three fingers in your wet core. you whine, unprepared by the sudden intrusion. your legs move uncomfortably against the fabric of your skirt, which restricts you from spreading open your legs wider. you want to clamp down on katsuki's hand, but you know that that won't end well.

"patience, kitten." either by intuition or his own frustration, he speaks up gruffly. "all in due time." his thumb starts to knead your aching bud as he thrusts in and out, knuckle deep in your pussy. glancing at the clock, he grows impatient, quickly attempting to unbutton your blouse before ripping off the rest entirely. you'd normally protest - you liked that blouse - but you find yourself falling short of words at the pressure on your pussy. katsuki goes at a more rigorous pace, thrusting fast and deep while his free hand snakes itself under your bra to play with your nipple. the added stimulation has you keening to his touch, suddenly aware of his every touch. he pulls your bra cup down, freeing your breast and bending down to to encapsulate the hardened bud in his mouth. his tongue circles your areola and flicks your nipple; meanwhile, his pace on your pussy hasn't relented. 

soon, you feel the telltale feelings of pleasure bubbling through your body.  you tense against him, gasping out his name and clawing at his back. your knees buckle as your climax washes over you, making your body go limp in his hand. bakugou lets go of your nipple with a popping noise, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. his other hand pulls out, and he outstretches three cum-soaked fingers to you, an unspoken code for "suck." you open your mouth obediently, sucking your salty juices off his slim digits. 

"fuck," he cusses, eyes blown out wide in lust. "so fuckin' obedient for me, hm? such a fuckin' whore for your master."

you let go of the fingers in your mouth and nod. 

his non-wet fingers grip the bottom of your skirt. "off. now." 

"yes, master." you feel his eyes pierce you, watching you unzip your skirt and panties and let them pool around your legs. he holds you steady as you step out of the garments and toss them to the side. 

"sit up." he taps the desk lightly.

"it'll get w-w-" 

"did i stutter?"

"n-no, master."

he hums while you acquaint your bottom with the cold, hard wood of his desk.

"colour system, love?" his voice gets soft and he breaks the hard persona. his eyes are gentle, searching yours for any speck nervousness or hesitancy.

"green for 'i'm good, keep going,' yellow for 'slow down,' and red for 'stop.'"

"and if you can't speak?"

"three taps for red, two for yellow."

"what's your colour right now?"

"green, master."

his face hardens at the title. "always a good pet for me, aren't you?"

you nod. "yessir."

he spares another glance at the clock on the wall. "you're going to be a fucking good slut for master in the next 7 minutes, understand?"

"y-yessir."

"what was that, pet?"

"yessir."

"better be. spread." his fingers gesture to your legs.

he kneels before you, your drenched core spread out and on display for him at eye-level.

"so wet," he marvels, making your face heat up. like this, you're completely exposed to him; your breasts free from your bra, nipples hard against the cool air, and your pussy glistening under the light of his office.

he licks a long stripe up your folds, testing the waters. by now, the original intensity of your previous orgasm had worn off; despite this, when his tongue met your clit, you found yourself reaching for his hair, gripping it tightly. he groans into your pussy, poking his appendage through your folds and administrating kitten licks up and down your inner lips to slurp up whatever juices were left. the teasing doesn't last for long, however. he starts to suck harshly on your clit, making you buck into his face in overstimulation and surprise. you cry out at his unceasing ministrations, tugging on his hair and your toes curling. the overstimulation is too much; pain mixed with white hot pleasure blinds you. the lips closed against your clit go hard; you're not even sure how katsuki can breathe going at such a pace. the pain starts to blend into pure pleasure. you throw your arm over your mouth in attempt to stifle your noises, eyes shut tight. you feel tears line your eyes as you cum again, katsuki's tongue pressed flat against your pussy. the pleasure is five times more intense now; you cry out, sure anyone standing outside heard, and clutch katsuki's hair as you recover from your orgasm. your pussy convulses violently, and you pant in a similar manner.

"k-katsuki- master- i-" you breathe hard.

"one more for me, okay?" he rasps into your ear. "i know you can take it, kitten. so good for me..." his chin and lips shine with your essence.

you nod, spreading your sore legs further apart.

"colour?" he checks, hands starting to reach for his belt.

"green."

he nods and unbuckles, pulling his pants and boxers down to reveal his cock. katsuki leans in, hot breath fanning against you as he peppers kisses on your clavicle.

"you're gonna be a good cocksleeve for master, yeah? gonna be all fuckin' tight and wet for me?"

you whimper a shaky "yes," the head of his cock nudging your folds.

he eases his full length into you, the stretch always being something you always need to get used to. katsuki's not particularly girthy, but for what he lacks in girth he makes up in sheer length. he pushes in gently; it's clear on his face he wants nothing more than to ravage you, but he understands your needs.

"f-fuck," you gasps as he bottoms out. 

"ring ring ring," the tone of katsuki's phone rings through the room.

you lean over the desk, reading the caller id.

"it's horikoshi corp?" you say to katsuki.

"pick it up." there's a mischievous gleam in his eyes, but there's no time to dwell on it before you pick up the call.

"is this the office of ground zero?" a male voice asks through the line.

"yessir-" katsuki starts moving inside you, to which you bite your lip. "h-how can i help you?"

"this is regarding the meeting scheduled for today?"

"y-yes?" you gasp, flinging a hand over your mouth as bakugou starts thrusting into your core roughly.

"i'm terribly sorry to say this, but it appears that our boss has come down with food poisoning from lunch."

"don't- don't worry about it-" your knuckles are white gripping the edge of the desk, and you're slightly bent over it.

katsuki continues to hammer into you, speed increasing quickly.

"could we reschedule to friday, at 1:30pm?"

your mind skims through katsuki's friday schedule. "u-um... y-yes-! that can be arranged..." you're not sure if he can hear the wet slapping noises coming from your end of the line - but the thought of him knowing your dirty deeds with katsuki made you even wetter.

"alright, thank you!" the man sounds relieved. "goodbye."

"bye!" you half slam the phone down on the receiver, chest heaving.

"it's your lucky day, huh, kitten?" katsuki purrs smoothly. 

you nod, pressing yourself onto his desk so you're bent over it for him.

"such a fucking slut," you can hear the pride in his voice. "you like that, yeah? i can feel you clenching all around me. you're my fuckin' cockslut, right?"

your head bobs rapidly up and down. "yes, master- i'm-" you feel the familiar heat start to bubble in the pit of your stomach.

"don't you dare fucking cum yet," he growls in your ear, punctuating his words with a sharp thrust.

he presses you even harder into the desk, your breasts pushed up against the cold wood. 

"k-katsuki...!”

"my little pain slut, isn't that right?" 

"y-yes-! f-fuck, master-" 

he slaps your clit, making a loud, wet sound resound through the room.

it almost sends you over the edge. almost.

"don't- cum-" katsuki grunts in between thrusts.

you're so close it almost hurts. the pleasure overwhelms you; you shut your eyes tight to distract yourself, but you can only hear the sound of katsuki's heavy breaths and his cock slamming into you.

"katsuki- master- please, i can't-" tears start to form in the corners of your eyes. the pleasure is just too much, beating into you incessantly.

"you can, and you will," he orders, voice firm.

"k-ka- ka-" you blubber, tears dropping from your cheeks. you know you won't be able to hold it much longer; your pussy aches in need of release. "pl- pl, ka-"

"cum." it was the only word you needed to find yourself toppling off the edge, euphoria rippling over you violently.  tears stream down your cheeks, cum gushing from your heat. you're as limp as a doll in katsuki's arms, slumped against his desk. your pussy throbs, contracting violently - somewhere amidst your orgasm, katsuki had finished as well. your cheeks are wet, blouse thrown somewhere on the ground. your breathing is shaky as katsuki picks you up, stroking your hair delicately.

"hey, honey," he kisses your forehead softly.

you mumble incoherently, eyes drooping shut.

"you did so well for me... i didn't hurt you, did i?"

"no, 'suki.... 's good.... i liked it a lot..." you nuzzle into him, his body warmth comforting. katsuki smells of vanilla and caramel, a sweet combination that feels undeniably like home. 

you don't remember many of the next events well; everything blurs into a haze. you feel him gently thumbing your tears away, slipping your skirt and panties on and buttoning up one of his extra dress shirts on you.

the last thing you hear is a gentle "i love you," and before you know it, you're drifting asleep.

[mashiraostail]

could you maybe do a part 2 of the depressive episode ask with fatgum, hawks, n gang orca pease?

ofc anon! I think these get progressivley longer also fldsfdsjl idk why that is, sorry!

Taishiro Toyomitsu/Fatgum You were both busy people, Taishiro was even busier than your average pro now that he’d taken on those two students, he didn’t mind the extra work though. Plus he was used to having you around on top of it all. He understood you worked as well, and he’d even tried going there to surprise you since it had been a few days since the pair of you spent any time together which was entirely unlike you only for your coworkers to say that you’d called out a fair bit of time. Maybe you’d headed home, a family birthday or special occasion beaconed you, but whenever you left you always asked him to watch your place, he’d hardly heard from you beyond a text for the past week or so now. So he decided to head over to yours after calling it early one day, he sent Kirishima and Amajiki packing and told them he had a small emergency to deal with, which wasn’t exactly a lie. He was growing a bit concerned for you your lack of communication with him wasn’t just rare it was totally unheard of, normally you were joined to him at the hip, you adored him and you always made sure he heard it all the time. He didn’t want to be overbearing or show up uninvited but he hated the idea of you being sick or worse with no help around, he understood how badly you wanted to be perfect for him, you didn’t want to add to his workload or be a bother at all, he was just trying to figure out the best way to make you see that you could never do any of that to him, and you’re perfect for him however you want to be. He knocks on the door a few times to no avail before electing to use his key, you’d given it to him a while ago but he still knocked most of the time, he didn’t like barging in on you, despite how he loved to have you do it to him, nothing was better than an unannounced surprise visit from you in his eyes.  “Anyone home?” He shuts the door quietly behind him and looks around. The mess says you should be in, that’s for sure. He’s holding a bag of snacks in his hands, plus some medicines and general stuff in case you were sick with a cold or the flu, and he already had his whole chastising speech set up in his head for you.  But he had to find you first. There wouldn’t have been any place for you in the living room, the couch was littered with groceries that had yet to be put away, the coffee table covered in glasses and the kitchen wasn’t much better, it was full of everything and anything but actual food. The door to the laundry room was just barely holding a tidal wave of unfolded clothes back. The bedroom door was slightly ajar.  “Hey, you-”  He nudges the door open with his shoulder, “‘re you decent? Can I open my eyes ‘fore I bump into something-”  “Taishiro?” He hears the rumpling of blankets, and your voice is wet and tired and warbly and even though you didn’t give him the go-ahead he couldn't help but rush over to you at the sound of it. “Hey, what’s the matter? He drops the bag on the bed to your other side and instinctively cups your face in his hands.  “What are you doing here I-”   “I was just in the area and... it’s been a while since I spent any time with you, sorry barge in like this, you didn’t answer the door, I just wanted to check on you..and it seems like it was a good thing I did..” You’re looking up at him like a deer in headlights, it’s only then that he realizes his potential indiscretion. He moves to pull away from you, to wait for a green light to touch you and be close to you, he didn’t want to overwhelm you, or make you feel guilty or anything like that. You can sense that he’s about to pull back, and a few minutes ago all you wanted was to be alone but now that he was here, the last thing you wanted was for him to not be near you. You take a hold of his wrist.  He let out a long, thankful sigh, “alright then, I’ll stay right here.” He sits on the edge of your bed, “I’m glad you’re here.” He nudges your hair back with his other hand, “’re you sick?”  You shake your head in his hands, “No I just-” Your voice waivers, “I feel so terrible-”  “Terrible like how?” He looks guilty of something and it just makes you feel worse, “did something happen? Someone giving you a hard time or-”  “No-” You choke it out tears already slipping down your face, “I just..I’m so exhausted and I feel like everyone hates me or forgot about me and I know somewhere in my head that that’s such a stupid thing to even worry about but I can’t stop worrying and-”  “Hey, it’s alright, it’s alright,” he shushes you, “I see now, I get it now.” He pushes your cheeks up under his palms, “I’m sorry I didn’t notice sooner. I didn’t come sooner-”  “It’s not your job to take care of me-” You warble, “I’m being a stupid baby I-”  “Stop that. Just because something isn’t my job or responsibility doesn’t mean I still won’t wanna do it. You take care of me all the time.” “This isn't the same I-”  “Come on and give me a hug.” He cuts you off before you can get anything else out, “I really need a hug, can you?” He scoops you up, underneath your arms and pulls you forward, he drops back into your mussed up pillows.  “Tighter,” he complains as your arms coil around him weakly, and you laugh through a cascade of tears.  “Feels good to cry huh?” He’s holding the back of your head with more protective instinct than you’ve ever felt from anyone. His other hand pulls the blanket up around you.  “I couldn’t- I’ve been- all week and I just-” You hiccup, “I had to so bad but I couldn’t, and you-” He shushes you again. “Go on ahead, cry as much as you need to. I won’t say it doesn’t break my heart a little to hear it, but I know you’ll feel better after. And don’t go apologizing for this either, sometimes it’s just what you need. Let it all out. I’ll be here if you get sick from it. Afterward, I can help clean up, get you in a nice hot shower, make you something to eat? Sound good?”  “Will you stay all night?” You were pressed into his chest, his tear-stained shirt muffled your voice but he got the idea.  “Honey, I’ll stay as long as you want me.” 

Keigo Takami/Hawks The no. 2 hero rarely has much time to kill, that being said Keigo liked to make it a point to see you as often as he could, or at least to text you. But over the past few days, you'd hardly replied at all, and when you did they were just simple one or two-word answers. It worried him, gnawed at him, for a myriad of reasons; were you sick? Were you drowning in work? Had you run into some kind of trouble? Were you injured? Had you gotten tired of waiting up for him? Sick of canceled dates and being woken up by him clambering out of bed early in the morning to answer a call, exhausted by all the would-be intimate moments between the pair of you that were interrupted by his work? All of these possibilities were equal parts nerve-wracking and heartbreaking. If you were sick he wanted you to reach out and ask him for help, there wasn’t anything he couldn’t make time for if you were involved, he’d figure it out, he always did... if you were in some kind of trouble or injured did you not feel like you could ask him to come to watch out for you without being a bother to him? Did he make you feel like a burden? Or worst of all had you just grown tired of him? Him and his baggage and his job? The gnawing in his chest become too hard to ignore. He could pawn this patrol off on someone else, it was a slow enough day anyways, maybe Enji would do it. He snorted at the thought. He’d just fly by your window, see if you were in, what you were up to. Maybe you were just swamped at work, he reminded himself, sure he was busy but that didn't mean you couldn’t be too, and two busy partners can make for sparse communication, there was a fair chance all of this was just you being busy too. He counts the windows and flies up, it wasn’t hard to memorize which one leads to your apartment. When he gets up there the blinds are open, he can see right inside.  You woke up feeling okay today, okay enough that you figured maybe you could tackle this goddamn laundry at least, it was making such a mess in the hall and you thought maybe if you got that sorted out you’d feel a little more useful. But somehow you just ended up sitting on the floor in the hall, back against the wall, laundry basket spilled before you in a bigger mess than when you started. You may be an adult with a job and apartment but you were crying about the mess. You were an adult, you can cry about whatever you want, that’s a perk of being an adult. You sink further into the wall somehow.  His vantage point lets him look clean through the living room into the small hallway where you sat. It’s slightly cracked, just enough that a few feathers can wiggle in and push it open enough that he can slide his fingers underneath. He should head to the ground, walk up the stairs and knock, like a normal person. But he can’t help it, he’s panicked, what the hell happened to you? You were just sitting there, laundry basket spilled, sobbing into your hands? Were you hurt? Did someone break-in? He couldn’t waste time on foot.  “Hey-” He strangles it out as he’s contorting himself to duck into your window, “It’s okay, hey- I’m here, I’m here now, babe what happened?” He’s squeezing into your window, his wings folding and tufting up against the windowpane, “do you need my help? Are you hurt? Is someone here did someone-” He falls inside unceremoniously, a ball of red feathers and sherpa by your house plant.  You’d never been so happy to witness his stupid antics, you’d never met someone so smart yet so dumb. It felt good to see him, you hadn’t realized how much you missed him. “Keigo?” You drop the shirt you were crying into, “n-no, I’m not hurt I just dropped the laundry and..-” Coincidentally it was his shirt.  “Is this because of me?” He notices it fall to the ground, he looks incredibly guilty, “did I do something to upset you? To-” he scrambles up into a sitting position, “make you feel like I don’t care about you?” A feather is already righting the tipped over laundry basket, a few more collecting various tee shirts and socks.  “What?” You wipe your face with your hands as he clambers over to you, you sniffle, “no Keigo you didn’t-” You shake your head as he nudges your legs apart and sits between your bent knees, “I’m sorry I’m the problem it’s me-” You look forward to him and his eyebrows furrow.  “What do you mean? No one’s the problem there isn’t a problem what’s the-” He squeezes your arms, “forget it. Where have you been? I’ve been so worried about you..and now I find you crying on the ground and-”  “I’ve been here.” Your voice cracks, “I haven’t gone out once.” You laugh wetly, “it’s embarrassing. I just...I can’t do it. I feel so useless. I do nothing all day but I’m so tired Keigo..I’m even too tired to sleep..”  The mess that would have taken you days to clean on your own was practically rectified now, and Keigo hadn’t even lifted a finger.  “I’m sorry I worried you.” You wither back into the wall and he shakes his head.  “I don’t want sorry. I get it, I understand now.” He takes your face in his hands, “I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner-”  “Your job’s more important than taking care of me like a child-”  “That’s not a fair comparison. And it’s not true anyway. I know my work is important but that doesn’t mean other things can’t be important too. I want to be here for you. You would if it were me right?”  You nod meekly at that, “thank you for coming I- I don’t even know what happened one minute it was fine and the next I-”  “It doesn’t matter. It happens to the best of us. I just wish you’d called me. Asked for my help I... I was so worried that you were sick or..worse than that.. you were sick of me.” He laughs a little, “how stupid is that right? Like you’d ever get sick of me.”  “Does that feather have my underwear?” You look at it over his shoulder.  “Sorry. I... thought it would be funny.” It falls to the ground, you snort. “You’re right. That is stupid Keigo.” You murmur, “I’d never get sick of you.” “My job’s important, I know it eats up my time, and we don’t get to be together as much as I want to sometimes...”  “I think I should be the one pleading my case right now Keigo.” You laugh a little, “my apartment is disgusting, I’m crying over dropped laundry and you haven't even seen the state of my kitchen yet. I ignored you for days over nothing, I’ve barely showered I probably smell abysmal and-”  “It wasn’t over nothing and you don’t need to plead your case with me because you’re going through a rough patch, I’m the one that’s been too busy to notice you struggling-” He shakes his head, “all because of my work, I can’t... not do it but I want to be with you, I want to be with you all the time, I’m probably so annoying blowing up your phone and climbing in your window whenever I have a few second... I don’t know how you put up with me, I’d get sick of me in a few days.” He reaches out and tugs the bottom hem of your shirt aimlessly, “I don’t know how you do it. I guess all I do know is that I want you to stay near me.”  “Keigo-” You warble and pull him into your chest, “I'm sorry I scared you-”  “Don’t be sorry just...know that I want you to ask me for help...I know it’s easier said than done but..well I just said it. I just wanna be with you, all the time, like 24/7 I don’t even care what we’re doing. I’ll do all your laundry forever if you just stay near me while I do it. It’s not a bother you aren’t burdening me just ask me for help. I don’t want you to feel like this...let’s just..” He turns into the crook of your neck and sighs, “stay like this for a minute. And then I’ll help you clean up around here, that’s what's upsetting you right? The mess? Lucky for you I’ve got plenty of hands...well feathers. And then we’ll see what else we can get done, together okay babe?”  “Yeah.” You press your cheek into his hair, “thank you for understanding.”  Keigo nods, his finger traces the neckline of your shirt and he speaks again, “Please don’t pull away so much, I missed you, you’re the only person around here who has any fun besides Rumi, and whenever we’re together one of us ends up with a broken bone or worse.”  You snort at that, “okay, noted.”  “And I think you smell great by the way.” 

Kugo Sakamata/Gang Orca It felt weird to be away from Kugo so much. You just hated the idea of him seeing you like this. You were tired and irritable and in a mess all the time, you hadn’t changed your pants in days and the only meal you’d had over the past 3 days was crackers and bread, maybe toast depending on your mood. Not to mention the laundry situation or the chaotic state of your bathroom. You normally hated mess, and even though you didn’t have the energy to clean it ..it still made you terribly anxious.  You were almost out of crackers, you hated that you lived in the exact area Kugo patroled, it was how you’d met in the first place, and normally it was a delight to run into him on your way home from your own job, even just catching a glimpse of him patroling out your window usually really improved your mood but the thought of running into him now made you sick to your stomach. You couldn’t get the energy up to put something nicer on, but you didn’t even have a morsel of food left, everything you had you’d Mcgyvered into something to eat. If you saw him you’d have to explain where you’d been for the past week, why you’d been basically ignoring him, and even when you did answer him it was just to blow him off or send him to voicemail. You wanted to see him, but you were too afraid at this point, you’d dug yourself into a deep hole, there’s no way he wouldn’t be mad at you. Not that he’d ever gotten mad at you before really. But this time would be different. Or at least you’d convinced yourself of that. Maybe keeping your hood up would stop him from recognizing you.  You made it to the store with no incident, you were feeling pretty hopeful, though equally drained, you barely went up and down 3 isles before deciding you were done after finding the pre-made cold brew you’d been craving. It amounted to about 3 bags total, and the cold brew bottle wasn’t exactly small..well you could always order out.  Worried was a gross understatement, Kugo was sick with it. He wanted to barge in, everytime he offered to go to you you said no, you had a conference call, you were working late, your neighbors were fighting again, so on and so forth. That paired with the one to two-word answers he’d been receiving made his stomach hurt in a way he only experienced when he couldn’t tell the outcome of a big mission. He asked if you were okay practically every day and you always said you were fine. Though when he mentioned it to Hakamada the other hero informed him that ‘I’m fine’ was usually 'code’ for something else. If space was what you wanted then he’d let you have some...that being said when he saw what was certainly your receding figure on the street..wearing shorts in this weather?  “Hey-” His voice makes you jump out of your skin. God the universe seriously hates you this week.  “Kugo-” You don’t wanna turn around.  “What are you wearing? It’s freezing out you should be wearing a coat and pants.” He wraps an arm around you, “you’re shaking. What were you thinking huh?” He reaches out and takes your groceries too, “you better be going home.”  “I am..” You murmured, “I just needed to run out fast, I’m not cold, don’t get distracted from work because of me-”  “I’ll bring you home. It’s fine, don’t worry about that there are plenty of people out today.”  “I-”  “Please let me bring you home.” He huddles you into his side, “I’ve been worried..”  “Have you?”  “Of course I have, you’ve made yourself so scarce recently, and now this?”  “’m sorry..” You hug your chest as you turn the corner to your complex.  “Do you want me to come up with you?” He turns to you. Now you were at a crossroads, you’d seen him, you were seeing him, he was touching you, his side was warm and his arm around you was comforting and the idea of being alone was equally as upsetting as the idea of him seeing the state of your apartment or the state of you close up. “You aren’t even wearing layers.” He scoffs as the neckline of your hoodie dips a bit. “Do you want me, yes or no? Either is okay but you need to get inside before you get sick.”  “I do want you to come with me I just-”  “Well explain upstairs then.” He's ushering you inside the moment you finish. “Did you lose your keys?” He’s still squeezing you into his side when you stop at your front door. “I... don’t want you to see it.”  “See what my love? Your apartment? I think we’re a bit past that.” He presses his nose into your hood which is still covering your head. “It’s a mess- I’m a mess Kugo.”  “I doubt it's that bad. Even if it is I won’t mind, so let’s go in instead of standing out here like two fools.”  “Promise you won’t be mad.” You turn the key and he sighs.  “I promise.” The door creaks open and you aren’t sure if it’s your anxious mind playing tricks on you or if it’s 10x worse than what you remember.  “Oh god-” You warble, “I'm so sorry Kugo this is so embarrassing.” The way your voice breaks makes him jump. “Hey-” He sets your groceries down on the sliver of free counter space he can find, “no tears my love, no tears okay?” He puts his hands on your shoulders, “is this where you’ve been? Why you haven’t been talking to me? You’ve been all shut up in here?” He turns to you and you just want to fold in on yourself and disappear. “I wanted to clean, and I wanted to call you but  I just couldn’t get the energy to and it kept piling up and my bathroom is even worse and I didn’t know what to do and then even when I started to miss you I was too embarrassed at the idea of you seeing me like this because I can’t even comb my hair right now let alone take a shower or even change my clothes and I was afraid you’d be angry with me for letting it get so bad and I-” “Stop.” He pulls you forward and you fall against him wistlessly, “relax, you’ll work yourself up to tears like that.” He cups the back of your head. “I won’t ever be mad you for something like this. Why would you be afraid of that?” He takes your face in his hands, “and why would you be embarrassed of me seeing you when you don’t feel well? I’m here to help you.” He nudges your hood back, “call me sooner next time, please, if not for your sake for mine.” A big hand cups the nape of your neck, “I was worried sick about you dear.”  “I’m sorry-” Your voice cracks, “I’m sorry Kugo I just-”  “I understand. I’m sorry too, I should have checked in sooner, I should have made sure you knew you can trust me with this sort of thing.” “It’s my fault not your’s don’t be sorry Kugo I-” You’re blinking back tears and he sighs. “There’s no sense in going back and fourth about it.” His thumb rubs your temple, “I’m just glad I’m here now. I’m sorry you don’t feel well but seeing you after so long is a relief, I really missed you.”  “I missed you too Kugo-” Your voice cracks and you throw your arms around his neck and shoulders.  “Do you need to cry? Don’t hold back for my sake.” A big hand rubs circles between your shoulder blades egging you on, “if crying will help then cry. I’m right here for you. No more worrying okay my dear?”  “Okay-” You wipe your nose on your sleeve over his shoulder, tears falling freely, “thank you for coming Kugo-” Your feet are hardly on the ground anymore, your face nestled into his shoulder, “I’m sorry for getting tears all over your-”  “What did I say about worrying?” He pulls you back and uses his thumb to clean off one cheek, leaning down and brushing his nose against the other you let out a thankful sigh at the gentle touch.  “I just can’t help it Kugo-” You murmur, voice still wet with tears, “i just love you so much and I don’t-”  “Oh, you’re such a sweet little thing.” He pulls you up a bit by your cheeks, “it just breaks my heart to see you like this. I may never let you out of my sight again.”  “I’m okay with that.” You duck into his neck with a hiccup and he laughs.  “I love you too, why don’t you take a warm shower, I’ll help you however I can, then I think we should call it a night, we can worry about the mess tomorrow.” “You don’t mind?” You squeeze him around his shoulders and he hums.  “I don’t mind at all.” He promises, “I’ll do whatever I can to help you feel better.”

[waywardwrestlewritingwaif]

Raise the Stakes, Part 3

Ok, so this section is a lot longer than the previous ones, which is specifically what I was trying to avoid by splitting it up, but I'm certain that there was no way to insert an act break in this without it ruining the flow of the action.

If this is the first part of the story you're finding, you'll want to get caught up:

Place Your Bets (prequel)

Part one Part two

Pairing: Jay White x OFC/ David Finlay x OFC

Word count: 3,007

Content advisory: graphic sexual content, language, mild violence that some may find upsetting or disturbing.

“Jesus, Jay, what the hell?” You push at his chest, not that it’s going to do you a bit of good.

“Where have you been?” He hisses.

“Oh, are you seriously going to do this? You know where I’ve been. I had a date, I spent the night with him. And then I spent the day with him.”

“Didn’t bother asking for my permission.” His tone is so icy and mocking, and so uncharacteristically controlled that you’re a little frightened.

You exhale and let yourself go limp. “No, I didn’t. And you know what, I don’t give a fuck. I’ve killed myself trying to make you happy and right now I have no idea why. So if you want to try to make me feel guilty for spending every minute I can with someone who doesn’t treat me like I’m beneath contempt, if you want to punish me for running away and feeling happy for a few hours, you go right ahead.”

Your breathing is so rapid that you know he won’t believe that you actually don’t care but what’s the worst he can do? Is it really going to be any worse than what you’ve put yourself through trying to make him love you back?

He snickers quietly and slides one of his hands around the base of your throat. He doesn’t squeeze or push, just leaves it there like a silent threat. He’s more than strong enough to strangle you without even having to exert himself. That’s crazy, though, isn’t it? Yes, he’s abusive and heartless and manipulative but he’s also someone you’ve known for years. There’s no way Jay would actually hurt you. Is there?

He leans his face close so that you can hear his breath rasping in your ear. “That’s sweet. Did your little boyfriend treat you nice? Did he make you feel special?”

“Jay,” you tell him, trying to keep your voice steady, “you need to get off of me right now. I don’t know if you’ve been drinking or taking speed or what but it has to stop.”

His hand pushes just a little further up and feels just a little heavier.

“Answer me. Did he make you feel good?”

“This is none of your business.” You give an exasperated sigh. “Yes. I had a great time. He made me feel like the most beautiful, most desirable-“

For the first time, Jay tightens his grip on your throat, cutting off your air and your words.

“So he fucked you well? Made you come? Had you screaming his name?”

He releases you again and in the wake of the terror of the last few seconds, you’re suddenly furious.

“Yes, he did. So many times. Best sex I’ve ever had in my life.”

“Oh, you want to be mean? Think you’re going to hurt my feelings like you haven’t been panting after me like some pathetic stray dog for years? I pay you, I let you get your little shots in, I fuck you which no one else has until the last week.” His hand drops from your throat but just as quickly, his other hand grabs a handful of your hair, pulling it so tight that you feel a few strands ripped out at the root. He twists your head to the side, pinning it to the pillow.

“Jay, you’re hurting me!” For the first time, the fear is in your voice. You’ve never seen him like this. You don’t know who this man in your bed is.

“You want to know what hurts?” He snarls. “I trusted you.”

“What are you talking about? What do you think is going on? It’s a couple of dates, Jay. I took a day off and didn’t tell you. Can’t you be a little happy for me?”

“I trusted you,” he repeats. “And you betrayed me.”

“Betrayed? Don’t be so dramatic. This is not about you.”

He grabs your throat again and squeezes.

“I saw you,” he drawls, biting down hard on your earlobe. “I saw you yesterday in his arms, all happy and smiling. You couldn’t even be bothered to close the fucking door.”

Your brain scrambles to catch up. Did he mean this morning? No, he wouldn’t have had any reason to be skulking around on a different floor of the hotel. Did Sanada say something after all? Then it occurs to you. Sanada hadn’t closed the door when he left the room yesterday. He probably hadn’t even thought about it. The door was almost always open. You’d closed it because you wanted to work. David had closed it because he wanted to keep your secret. Sanada had opened the door, gotten a drink, and walked out like he always did, and you and David had been so blissed out that you hadn’t noticed.

“Look,” you gasp, clawing at his hand, “we can talk about this. It doesn’t have to be a big deal.”

He gives a pained cry and bites down hard on your neck, making you cry out in turn.

“This is a huge fucking deal. I am not going to let that little mealworm wriggle in and take what’s mine.”

He releases your neck again and as you draw in oxygen, you frantically try to think of how to defuse the bomb on top of you. If he wants to, he can end David’s career in New Japan. He can easily stop the two of you from seeing each other. What’s clear, though, is that he’s not firing you, which would be a mercy, because if that’s what he wanted, he’d have done it already.

What’s also clear, and you hate yourself for it, is that you’ve never been more turned on in your life. Feeling the weight of him on you, the burning intensity of his expression and his words. It’s like he can barely control himself, that he’s fighting to stop himself from tearing into you. You’ve never seen him act like this about anything.

“No one’s taking anything from you, Jay,” you insist, turning to look at him when he loosens his grip a little. “I’m not going anywhere. I work myself to the bone for you and that’s not going to change.”

He gives a sardonic laugh. “And he’s so pathetically in love that he’s fine with the kind of work you do for me?”

“I didn’t mean that and you know it. That was never exactly part of the job description. But everything else stays the same.”

“Except that you’re fucking David Finlay.”

“Except that I have a life outside my job. And you won’t have to put up with me panting after you as you so delicately put it.”

“No.” He says it so loudly it startles you.

“What do you mean no?” You whine. “This is how normal people do things. Some people work together. They have relationships with other people. They don’t crawl into a coworker’s bed in the middle of the night and scare them half to death thinking-“

“No,” he repeats sharply.

“Why?” You whimper.

“You’re mine and he can’t have you.” He shoves the bedcovers out of the way and roughly runs his hands over your nude body. “He can’t have any part of you. Not your pussy, not your mouth, not your loyalty, not your feelings.”

You’re about to argue but he crushes his mouth against yours and although you know the only sane thing to do is fight him off, you reciprocate without hesitation, relishing the little moans and purrs that escape him as the kiss grows more and more passionate.

“I’ve been so terrible,” he murmurs. “My girl needs a reminder of why she puts up with me.”

He squeezes your breast, twisting his fingers around the nipple just firmly enough to make you gasp. And you know you shouldn’t, you know you should smack him in the head or scream into his ear and do whatever it takes to make him go away because you’re very aware what’s at risk. But as he kisses his way down your body, giving little hums and sighs of satisfaction when you twitch or gasp in response, it’s like the lovely memories you were clinging to when you crawled into this bed a few hours ago are becoming foggy and disjointed, like something you might have imagined to make yourself feel better about the situation you’re really in.

For the longest time, he lets his mouth hover around your pussy, just soft licks and kisses over the hollows of your hips, the inside of your thighs, and over the inner and outer lips, gently sucking on the flesh as his hot breath vibrates over your clit.

“This is the best smell in the world,” he murmurs into your skin, “and I never take the time to enjoy it.”

Your whole body is shaking by the time he starts thrusting his tongue against you. You want to push back against him but you force yourself not to, hoping to withstand his attention, to refuse to let him bring you to orgasm. The problem is that when he makes the effort, Jay is an incredible lover.

“Don’t hold back,” he cajoles, having detected what you’re trying to do. “Give into it. Let go.” He looks up at you and flashes an evil little grin. “I won’t tell, I promise.”

You try to curse at him but of course, he intensifies his actions and all you can do is grab hold of the sheet with all your might and try to stop yourself from screaming. He alternates fucking you with his tongue and lavishing attention on your clit, pausing only to keep encouraging you to relax and let it happen, to let him pleasure you and with each passing second, it seems more ridiculous to even try to stop it. You’re too far gone in every sense.

“Oh god, fuck, Jay!” Your silence gives way at the same time as your body and you blurt out his name like it’s the only thing you’re capable of saying.

He lifts his head just enough so that you can see the thick gloss of your juices on his lips and through his beard before he starts kissing you and touching you again. He stays away from your too-sensitive bud but his lips and fingers move everywhere around it, finding a whole ring of nerves outside and inside just begging for attention. You can’t even tell if it’s just powerful aftershocks you’re feeling or if you’re rolling through orgasm after orgasm. Does it matter? It does not.

Gradually he glides up your body, still rocking against you, caressing you all over as he moves, like he wants to make love to every part of you individually. You run your fingers through his hair, lightly scratching at his scalp like you know he loves. You're rewarded with deep purrs of satisfaction, like he’s a big cat you’ve managed to tame. Usually, you don’t get the opportunity to touch him like this, but you figured it out early on and you’ve never forgotten.

You wonder if he knows he was the first man to make you come. You’ve certainly never told him. It’s not like you were that experienced but you’d been with enough men by the time you first got together with Jay that you’d pretty much given up hope that you’d meet a man who’d be able to figure you out. And then he’d come along and made you fall apart like it was nothing. He still can.

His kisses become more playful and ticklish, which gets you both laughing a little.

“You deserve it.” He says the phrase in the same singsong cadence that fans chant it during shows. “You deserve it.”

This gets you laughing even harder so that you’re almost caught off guard when he starts licking and nipping at your neck in earnest.

His rigid cock is sliding against your soaked pussy but he’s making no effort to enter you. You buck your hips a little to let him know he’s welcome.

“I don’t have to,” he tells you, running a finger ever so delicately down your throat and over your collarbone. “This is for you.”

“You don’t want to?”

He laughs. “More than anything. But for once I’m telling you it’s not about what I want. I mean it. You can send me back to my room if you like.”

“You know I want you.”

“Like this?” He thrusts his hips hard against yours.

“Exactly like that.”

He needs no further encouragement to guide himself into you, gasping like it’s the best thing he’s ever felt as he begins pumping into you.

“That son of a bitch fucked you all night and you’re still as tight as when I met you.”

A pained sound escapes you and the word “no” just after it. You cover your face with your hand and try not to picture where you were twenty-four hours ago.

Roughly, he pushes your hand back. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. You just feel so good, always so fucking good.”

He kisses you insistently but sweetly, pulling on your legs so that they curve over his broad shoulders, allowing him to push deeper inside you as he picks up his pace. As he moves, he rolls you a little further forward, to the point you think that if his arms weren’t firmly planted on either side of your head, the two of you would end up turning a summersault. The higher the angle, the deeper he’s able to get and the more contact he’s able to get with your g-spot, so that you’re practically screaming again as you feel the tension rising like lava in a volcano.

“That’s so good,” you whine, grabbing onto his bicep. You have to focus on pulling oxygen into your lungs or you’ll pass out. “I’m gonna come again, Jay.”

“I’m right with you,”

Your eyes close for a second before you feel his hand insistently rubbing at your cheek and temple.

“Open your eyes,” he rasps, obviously on the brink of losing control of himself. “I want to see those beautiful eyes when you come.”

You oblige and it’s just in time as you go to pieces, your muscles spasming and squeezing tight around him. And it’s only seconds before you feel him come hot and wet inside you, gradually slowing his movements until the two of you are still, hands running over each other as you catch your breath.

He finally rises, pushing himself down the bed and lifting one of your legs over his. You’ve never seen that look on his face before, like he can’t process what has just happened or how he’s feeling about it. He just sits there, stroking your leg as his expression goes through a series of subtle changes until his eyes come to rest on your pussy.

He’s not making any effort to conceal the hunger in his stare. His hand drifts up your thigh and he strokes at the apex of it with a calloused thumb.

“It’s perfect,” he mumbles. “Fucking perfect. The color, the shape, those gorgeous thick lips. It’s like I never want to look at anything else.”

“I don’t think anyone’s ever said anything like that to me before.”

“I wish I had. I wish I’d said it every time you let me have it.” He squeezes at the flesh just a little and teases pushing a couple of fingers inside. “I want to take a picture.”

“No way.”

“I know, I know. I’d just love to take a picture and send it to him so he could see what he’s missing. So he could see how beautiful it looks with my cum leaking out of it.”

You spring up and try to push yourself away but he instantly has a tight grip on your leg and gives a sharp bite to the inside of your knee.

“I’ll bet he was a good little boy,” he sighs, resting his head against your thigh. “I’ll bet he wore a condom for you so that you felt nice and safe.”

You can’t even speak, you're so angry.

“He did, didn’t he?”

“It’s none of your goddamned business, Jay.” You glare at him, wanting to wipe that infuriating smile off his face forever. “Yes, we used condoms. A lot of them.”

“Oh of course. I forgot what an amazing lover he is. All sweet and attentive.”

“Not as sweet as you think, asshole. But you’re right about amazing. Like I said, the best-“

“No, he isn’t.” He pushes the heel of his hand against your pussy, stimulating the nerves without making it physically painful. “Did you tell him you let me fuck you without a condom? That you stay on birth control for me?”

“Funny,” you sneer, “it didn’t come up.”

He stares at you, flicking his tongue over his lips.

“Why do you always have to be such an asshole?” You groan.

“Would you still be here if I wasn’t?”

That hits you like a glass of ice water and while you’re trying to think of a retort, he pulls you up onto his lap and starts peppering you with kisses like he hasn’t just behaved like a monster.

“You think I’m joking but I’m not,” he whispers. “I’m not letting you go away. I’m not going to settle for being the second most important man in your life. “

“I don’t think it would bother you if you weren’t thinking you were about to come second to David Finlay. Again.”

He locks his arm around you and stands up in one smooth movement. You know how hard he works on his body and how strong he is but your jaw still drops a little at how effortless it is. He doesn’t even have to hold you particularly tight to support your whole weight.

“What do you think you’re doing?” You croak.

“I’m not done with you yet.”

And with that, he whisks you off to his adjoining room.

[deathonyourtongue]

Sanguine Nocturnus | 1

Summary: Even after 2000 years, the world can still surprise you. Pairing: AU!Henry Cavill x OFC Word Count: 2K Warnings: It’s a vampire fic. Death. Blood. Gore. Sex. Horror. Not for the kiddies or the squeamish. I mean it. A/N : I know I said I’d wait. But y’all have been clamoring...

Death has a way of manipulating time. Moments meant to go slowly end in a blink, while junctures that ought to speed past, linger like dew on the vine...

Carla Montanari stared at her mother’s corpse, waiting for her to move. Waiting for the only family she’d ever had to open her eyes and say it was all a joke. Her mother had always had a cutting sense of humor; no topic was off-limits, and as she aged, death was a favored punchline. Now, it seemed, her mother had pulled off the ultimate prank, though Carla failed to see the humor in it.

The mortician had done an excellent job all things considered, but Carla could still pick out the differences between the body that lay at the altar of Saint Vincent’s and the one she had grown up with. A jaw that had been given too much lift, makeup that was a shade or two darker than what her mother normally wore, wrinkles that had disappeared when her face had been sewn back together. She’d been told she was lucky to get an open-casket service at all, given how much trauma her mother had suffered, as if it were some sort of consolation prize.

Looking behind her, Carla did a headcount of those in attendance, smiling softly when she saw that her mother’s bingo group were all in attendance, each woman donning their Sunday best in order to pay their respects. What her mother lacked in family, she’d more than made up for in friends who were all cut from the same cloth. Good, salt-of-the-earth people. Carla had always envied how easily her mother made friends, how she could chat up anyone, no matter how different their background and find something in common. It was a skill she hadn’t passed down, leaving her daughter to carve out a small handful of friends who were more acquaintances than anything else. 

Crossing herself, Carla took a deep breath, looked down at her mother once more, and finally leaned down to kiss the cold, clammy skin of her forehead, doing her best to ignore the faint waft of formaldehyde that filled the casket. A solitary white rose tucked beneath her mother’s hands was Carla’s final act before turning away. 

Time blinked, and she found herself seated across from her mother’s lawyer, a slab of mahogany separating them, the coffee she’d been offered growing cold as the AC hit it from overhead.

“I suppose we can do away with formality, since it’s just you,” the older man said, his smile tight and distant. Carla nodded, feeling as though the man wanted to be done so he could attend to other, more important, matters. 

“Your mother left all her possessions and accounts to you, no surprise there. She gifted her friends each an item from her apparently extensive purse collection, so we’ll facilitate that for you. The accounts are all in order, and what isn’t used to pay off her final bills, will be transferred to your account by the end of the month. Lastly, there’s the matter of the inheritance. This may be news to you, but your grandmother set up an inheritance in your name when you were born. Initially, it was meant to pay for college, but when you got your full ride, your mother decided to keep it going until her passing. Her hope was to give you a nice nest egg for retirement, or your first house...something to that effect.” 

Carla looked down at the document, counting and recounting the total in disbelief. Her mother had always been terrible at keeping secrets, having given away things to her friends that had mortified Carla when she was younger. 

Guess you were better at it than I thought.

Inhaling deeply, Carla sat back in her chair, hoping the meeting was over. The quicker she could get out into the fresh air, the better off she’d be. 

“There’s one more thing,” her mother’s lawyer said, keeping Carla rooted to her seat even as the muscles in her legs twitched in readiness to stand up. “Your mother wanted to ensure you were aware of the fact that you have legal claim to Italian citizenship, if you should ever choose to take it. They call it Jure Sanguinis; Right of Blood. The process can be expedited, given that you’re only second generation American. Sign here and we can get it in motion for you.” 

Carla signed blindly, eyes unblinking as she tried to process the information. Her mother had always been a planner, but had never once mentioned so much as a will to Carla. Now, seeing everything packaged up so neatly, her mind spun wildly.

“Think you know a person…” She muttered mostly to herself, the lawyer giving her another one of his performative smiles, his eyes going to his watch for what must have been the tenth time in as many minutes. 

Leaving the office with a folder and the untouched coffee, Carla couldn’t help but feel time begin to crawl, reinforcing the feelings of numbness and solitude that would haunt her for weeks to come.

Working steps from Wall Street had its perks. Tips were usually far more generous than in other parts of town, fights were rare, and drunk girls crying over their shitty boyfriends were nonexistent. None of that made it any easier, however. Frat boys turned into day traders, socialites grew even more entitled as their brunches turned into botox appointments, and there was never a shortage of patronizing stares for those that had to actually work for a living. For Carla, navigating the catcalls, one-liners, and straight-up sexual misconduct was easy enough; it was the entitlement that never failed to get under her skin. 

“Um, hello? Waitress? This is wrong. I asked for a Negroni.” Looking up, Carla swept her long black hair over her shoulder as she processed the words that were spoken. Having decided to keep living life as though things hadn’t irrevocably changed, Carla was doing her best to ignore the stress that had been slowly creeping higher and higher each day. Busy nights at the bar were proving the worst, with Carla coming through the door at the end of her shift ready to rant about the night to her mother, only to find the place pin-drop silent and utterly empty. 

Looking down at the drink, Carla gazed back up at the woman with the blond, news anchor hair and cocked her head to the side in confusion. 

“That is a Negroni.” 

“Uh,” the woman snorted in disbelief, “no it’s not. Remake it, and do it right this time.” 

“This is a Negroni. One part gin, sweet vermouth, and Campari each, with a peel of lemon.” The woman laughed condescendingly and Carla could feel her patience start to disappear. 

“No, a Negroni, if you knew anything about bartending--which you clearly don’t--is made with Rye and dry vermouth.”

“Lady, I make at least ten of these a night. I work six nights a week. You’re the first, and only, person to ever tell me it’s wrong. You’re thinking of an Old Pal, and I’d be more than happy to make that for you, but this? This is a Negroni, which is what you asked for.”

“Fine, we’ll see about that.” The woman huffed, her manicured hand slicing through the air in a dismissive motion. 

“That’ll be $10.99.”

“Absolutely NOT! I’m not paying for your mistake. Make it again, make it right, and make it now!” The woman crowed, her hair imobile as she shook her head, looking for all the world like Carla had slapped her.

“It’s a different drink. You paid for a Negroni, you got a Negroni. You want an Old Pal, you pay for an Old Pal.” Carla replied, crossing her arms over her chest as she waited for the woman to make up her mind. 

The alcohol burned Carla’s eyes and she stumbled back in shock, moving towards the large sink she knew was behind her on pure instinct. Washing her face to get as much of the cocktail off as she could, she knew she’d reached her breaking point. 

Any other time and she’d have brushed it off, had security kick the woman out and gone about her night. Now? She’d had enough. Moving slowly to the back, Carla took off her apron, hung it up next to her coworkers’ and slipped out the back door. 

Nearly sprinting the whole way home, it was only as she stepped through the door of her apartment that the tears came unbidden. Sliding down the wall, Carla cried for the first time since her mother’s passing. 

The next morning, after calling in her notice, Carla allowed herself a day to simply be. To scream, to cry, to let out all the emotions that had befallen her since answering the phone that fateful night and hearing that her mother had died in such a vicious and preventable way. She let rage fill every vein as she thought about how the person who hit her hadn’t even bothered to stay at the scene. She lamented every missed moment, every fight, every what-if. Finally, she curled up in her mother’s robe, and cried herself to sleep.

Knowing she couldn’t handle another day at a bar like the one on Wall Street, catering to bratty adults who’d never been told no a day in their lives, Carla began leaning more and more towards escaping it all. Her now-empty apartment, her routine assortment of familiar faces (none of whom had even bothered to call and offer condolences), and more than anything, the city itself; all of it seemed worthless and foreign without her mother’s smiling face. As she sat and scrolled through picture after picture on her phone, the promise of a new life in Italy seemed more feasible, and more and more necessary.

On day three, after a day spent mostly in bed, dreaming about the possibilities of what life could bring now that she was committed to leaving, Carla put in a call to the lawyer, vaguely remembering the document she’d signed. There was nothing but relief when she was told they were simply waiting for a few more documents to finalize it all. 

With the foundation for her new life in place, Carla began to flesh out the bones, focusing her research on where to live, and who was hiring. Though the inheritance was enough to live comfortably for several years, Carla didn’t want to squander it. Moreover, she still wanted to work and feel useful in some way; early retirement could wait.

While she was spoilt for choice when it came to renting, a job was harder to come by. Carla started her search with the lofty goal of finding something where she could put her history degree to good use; a research assistant, a curator, hell, a tour guide. When it became clear that her lack of experience was a hurdle she wouldn’t be able to cross so easily, Carla reluctantly turned to what she knew. 

Weeks went by like thick molasses as she looked at bar after bar, finding that they either weren’t hiring, or looked like the kind of place people went into and never came out of. Her options were narrow to start with, since Carla had her heart set on Rome, the need to entrench herself in one of the world’s oldest cities, one she couldn’t possibly ignore. With each day that passed, she felt her dream beginning to slip away. Carla was nothing if not tenacious, one of the few traits she’d shared with her mother, and despite feeling discouraged at her prospects, she kept looking.

Finally, as the clock nearly ran out on her deadline to provide proof of employment, Carla found the perfect spot. Though the bar catered to a higher-end clientele, gone were the stockbrokers and lawyers, and in their place, a younger, cooler set. Attracted to the dark, almost feral, atmosphere the bar promised in its advertising, Carla applied, crossing her fingers in the hopes that they’d call. 

She was still browsing the site when her phone rang and the owner greeted her in a thick, Italian accent. Breezing through the interview questions, Carla’s eyes roved over the pictures of all the beautiful people that frequented the night spot, pulled in by how effortlessly cool each of them looked. With the promise to call her by the end of the week to confirm the position, the owner ended the call, and it was all Carla could do not to jump for joy. 

Flopping back on the bed, she couldn’t help but let herself feel true happiness, happiness which she’d unconsciously been denying herself while she mourned her mother’s death. Though she’d been dealt a life-changing blow, Carla felt as though, slowly but surely, time was going back to its usual pace, and her life was taking a turn for the better. 

With a smile from ear to ear, she sat back up and emailed the lawyer, confirming she’d gotten a job, an apartment, and a plane ticket to Rome. As the message zipped away and the window closed, Carla found her eyes drawn back to the website, and her new place of employment. 

Romulus

[kouyurii]

omg i had the worst thought, ann teuirfksjd so i've read this fic a while ago by a writer (i can't remember who, so i won't say who i believe it is, since i don't wanna be wrong hahahah) about how osamu is afraid of love because someone he dated in the past only dated him to be able to get closer to atsumu. and when he found out, the girl legit berated him so badly and made him feel insecure about himself on not keeping this facade to make himself happy, even though it's all fake.

so my thought is that osamu will likely not tell atsumu about it for a long time. when atsumu asks about where that girl is, osamu would likely just say they broke up, but he wouldn't look at atsumu at all when he said it. like he is so annoyed with his brother, even though he knows it is unreasonable that he thought of that. it's not atsumu's fault, osamu knows it a lot, but he can't help but hear the girl's words echoing in his ear over and over again

atsumu can tell something is wrong, but he can't really put a finger on it, so he shrugs it off. well... that is until he kinda finds out through suna, or probably kita if it's later in their lives (but i think suna is the one that most likely will accidentally say it) and he gets SO MAD, like he is in rage mode knowing that someone said that to his brother, and that they would use osamu for something like that. he would publicly humiliate them in front of everyone for trying to do something like that to osamu. he doesn't see reason, all he thinks of is red and how to give them a piece of his mind. he can't hit them, ofc, but if he could, he totally would. but he doesn't, he knows not to raise a hand against a lady (his mama's teachings)

osamu definitely finds out and tries to stop it, but atsumu doesn't. he stands up from his brother right then and there, saying how osamu is nothing like what that bitch claimed, and that he is so much better than him (i also think both brothers believe the other is better, but they keep it inside of them). and all that hype for osamu, atsumu ends up saying that all those things aren't deserved to be shared with the bitch that tried to date osamu for atsumu. and that osamu's ex was the one that actually lost, since they are so blind they couldn't see anything but dirt lololol

but my god, when the opposite happens, and the twins find out their s/o is so good to their brother, i think atsumu will cry and osamu will make them their favourite foods to celebrate HAHAHAHA

you thought of me when seeing it dfsukjbsd THAT'S SO SWEET OF YOU OMG (❤´艸｀❤) it is so cute, isn't it??? <3 i follow them on insta, and all of their miya stuff is so adorable, i wanna squeeze their cheeks uwu

hello again beloved minnie i am finally getting round to answering this ask after ten thousand years

heart is aching OSAMU DOESNT DESERVE THAT i would BEHEAD this girl without hesitation ....... osamu feeling so shitty about himself and not even telling atsumu about it 😞😞😞 ATSUMU COMPLETELY LOSING HIS SHIT WHEN HE DOES FIND OUT PLEASEE overprotective atsumu >>>>> AND THEM THINKING THE OTHER IS BETTER EVEN IF THEY WOULD NEVER ADMIT IT OUT LOUD 🥺🥺😞😭 literally makes my heart melt bc they love each other soso much they would literally commit murder for the other ;-;

atsumu crying when osamu finds someone who loved him for him thats so on brand im 🥺🥺 i imagine samu's s/o is probably friends with atsumu and has seen how samu roasts him so they probably dont take tsumu all that seriously ..... but when he threatens to make them suffer if they ever hurt samu.......... they feel the chill running down their spine before atsumu is back to his goofy self when osamu walks in T-T andandand when atsumu sees the s/o stand up for samu even when samu's not there, THATS when he cries :(

but omg imagine if it were the other way around,,, one of atsumu's coworkers taking advantage of him just to get closer to osamu... osamu, who isnt as "loudmouthed", or "troublesome" or "annoying" as atsumu......... osamu would literally slit their throat just imagine him seething with rage that someone would even try to hurt his brother like that,,,,,,,,,

screaming crying i love them so much

[kaptain-k-pop]

Alright ladies!!! After a full 65 hours of the album being out I am Finally sharing my Thots 👀

I have three full 8 hour shifts of listening to Nothing Else under my belt, (plus an unspecified number of hours listening outside if work...) so I'm Basically an Expert 😌💗

Dear my universe: We love a space/space-adjacent themed Astro song in this house 😌😌😌 this is such a nice choice to start off the album (also I'm a fucking nerd and so the way that the First Song on The Album is called 'Dear my universe' like addressing a letter? Like as if the album itself is kind of like a love letter from Astro to Aroha?? 🥺 Okay I'll stop. But it's just a thot that came into my head and now I'm having Feelings 🤧💜) the echoey parts and the harmonies?? So yummy, so pretty, I love it 💗

Butterfly Effect: HELLO my Love 😍💓💌��💜💞💖💘💕💗 I was Warned by @entry-777 to be prepared for Rocky Vocals, which is a Good Thing bc if I wasn't ready for it I probably would have started crying or somethin lame like that and looked Quite Foolish in front of my coworkers, however I was NOT warned about JINWOO VOCALS (Danny you slipped Queen!!! 😭) It was like. 6 seconds. But it was there and it's gonna live in my head rent free for the next full calendar year, also Moonbin and Eunwoo's falsettos??? GOD everyone sounds so great in this song. I love our Six Vocalists 😪💜

ONE: my ONE opinions have Grown and Matured over the course of listening to it quite literally like 75 times. Do not be mistaken, I never disliked it, but I did have Certain Opinions. For example, it is a Certified Fact that I have stated before: an Astro Title Track is not an Astro Title Track without MJ throwing up Angel High Notes above the last chorus. And when I listened to ONE for the first time I was not satisfied in that department. He did like, A Few, but I was waiting for more to come and like picturing in my head what it was going to sound like and then they didn't come and I was Mildly Disappointed. So that was just one thing that like, I wanted a little more than what I got, which does not mean that I didn't like what I did get!!! Anyway, after listening to it Many More Times and paying close attention to harmonies and such I am a bit more satified with the ad-libs he did get, it's just that this song is Different than other Astros Title Tracks, it is a different style so I guess what they gave him fits more with that style than what I was expecting (still wish he had gotten to shine a little more in this Title but what are you going to do?) It could very well be the 'you listened to this song so much you are tricking yourself into liking it more' thing, but my love for this song has definitely grown in the past few days (and again!! I never disliked it in the first place!) it is still not one of my top faves on the album but that's only bc Astro are B-side Kings! I still do really like this song

Someone Else: (okay at first I Did Not Realize this was just an MJJinjinMoonbin song?? I did not Know we were getting unit songs in this album, but that explains why I didn't hear anyone else's voices in it 🤷 agdjahdjakd) in any case, I like her! She is very Fun and Funky 😌 definitely one I will continue to listen to often (also fun fact: that electronic sound at like 2:32 the first time I heard it my body physically reacted like one of Pavlov's dogs bc that same sound is also in the song that I have set as my alarm ahdjskahdjsj 'oh? we are Waking Up now? :)' Queen calm down, you are awake lmao)

SNS: Ma'am..... Hello????? Omg I love this song so much, the beat, the vocals, the soda can (yes I noticed!!! Omg when I tell y'all I got a rush of serotonin when I heard that...) another thing I absolutely adore about this song is the 'ah-ahhh, ah-ahhh' part bc it makes my brain do the same thing as when it sees an optical illusion where the thing I'm seeing switches back and forth based on what I'm focusing on like 'oh, now I see a vase, oh now it's two faces' that except with sound (so an aural illusion I guess is what that would be??) Like 'oh, that's Human Voices making that sound' but then if I focus on it it sounds like an Electronic Phone Buzzing Text Notification Sound (and then I focus on it again and it's Voices) which is probably what was intended considering it's a song named after texting? I just think that's so cool, I love that they did that and it sounds really Neat

All Good: oh my GOD this song, oh 👏 my 👏 G 👏 O 👏 D 👏 All Good........... my BELOVED™ 💜💜💜 Mental Illness?? Idek her. Lee Dongmin said "Gonna be alright" so Everything is Fine now actually. I'm gonna Do Drugs (this song) and forget my problems 😌 this song qualifies as a Hardcore Party Drug. I am going to grind this song up into a fine powder and snort it like cocaine. Holy FUCK this song is good. I'm saying something controversial (it's not controversial, lmao, I know I am not the only one who thinks this) yet brave: Miss All Good is Title Track Material 👀 now idek anything about marketing so maybe ONE was a better choice for Title Track from a marketing standpoint idek, all I know is that All Good FUCKS I literally could talk about this song for hours omg, I need to stop this post is already so long but ALL GOOD I LOVE YOU QUEEN 👑 😭💓💘💗💕💜💌💝💞💖

All Stars: "yeah let's go haha" alright yes, whatever you say 😍 okay so in this song ofc I immediately noticed the "you're my one&only" we love that self reference 😌💜 but when I was looking at the lyrics I also noticed that we have "When you call me I'll run to you" and the Very First Line is "I've got a dream, when I run breathlessly" coincidence??? 👀 ....... yeah probably, I analyze things way too much agjdjdjdjd but ANYWAY I Love MJ's bridge(? is that the right word? the '이룰 테니까' part. U know what I mean) and the "everything is OK (lala la la)"??? Alright, Depression Cured, thanks Kings 😌👑💗

Our spring: if ONE left my thirst of Angelic MJ Runs not fully satisfied Miss Our Spring came through for me I LOVE ALL HIS PARTS IN THIS SONG SO MUCH AND THE R U N S yes 👏 king 👏 yes 👏 king 👏 thank you SO much 😌💖💜💗 Idk why but I just really latched on to this song, I love the chorus and Rocky's (설레는 날에) part, also I believe if I am Not Mistaken Rocky contributed to the lyrics on this? 👀 we love that for him! Especially bc the lyrics are so pretty and not just bc I am biased 💜

Stardust: another Space themed song it's my favorite concept again 😌😌😌 and y'all know that I am a Strings Appreciating Bitch 💗 so ofc I immediately had Feelings as soon as I heard them in the back. This song is so so so pretty?? the instrumental, the vocals, the lyrics? It's so calming and peaceful listening to this song, it feels so nice and cozy 😔💗 On all levels except physical I am laying on the roof stargazing and Astro is wrapping a blanket around my shoulders and giving me a lil kiss on the top of the head. This song would really be the Bloom of the album, if not for.....

gemini: the BLOOM of the album 😭💓💌💝💘💗💕💜💞💖 Miss gemini my beloved... 😔💜 "will you protect me? Even after the long night passes the place we embroidered together stays in our hearts" Don't TOUCH me 🤧🤧🤧 I can, have, must, am, and will cry about this song if I think about it for too long. Myungjun contributed to the lyrics, arrangement, and composition and it turned out so good?? (I mean of course it did) I'm very proud of him and I got more pretty Angel High notes in this song so I am Very Satisfied, I LOVE her so much 💗💗💗

And that's that!!!

If you are reading this, ps I love u for sticking around to read all my rambling pls accept a hypothetical forehead kiss or some fingerhearts sent @ u from a respectful distance 💗

Also my askbox is always open if you want to share your opinions, I love talking about these boys..... 👀

[boogiewrites]

No. 9: The Body

Chapter Three

Characters: Diego Hargreeves & OFC Eve Corpuz

Summary: Diego confronts Eve about the strange events that have surrounded him when he’s with her. Will he find the answers he wants? 

Warnings/Tags: Angst. Talk of injury and past trauma. 

Click on my icon then go to my Mobile Masterlist in my bio for my other works and chapters. Please like, comment and reblog if you enjoyed it! It helps out us writers A LOT! If you’d like added to the tags, just let me know. This is a multi-chapter fic.

Finally, she had a day off, where she could indulge in the tiny bit of irresponsibility her life and career balance allowed. She’d prepped an ice bucket to allow for maximum laziness, shoving her wine bottle into it. She looked at the wine glass she’d sat out and wondered how long she was going to lie to herself and pretend she wasn’t going to be drinking straight from the bottle.  She had sweets, snacks, and a jug of water and she was ready to settle in and binge and stay up as late as she possibly could. She’d probably pass out around dawn then figure it out from there. She had no plans, no drinks with coworkers, no fitness classes, just a hot date with her comfy couch, and a heavy pile of blankets. 

She’d fulfilled a small portion of this goal, an hour or two into her ‘Scrubs’ marathon when there was a tapping on her window. 

“Oh, kitty! You’re back!” She says quickly sitting down her wine and rising from her cocoon on the couch. “You’ve been gone a few days I was getting worried about you with the snow. I kept some fish from my leftovers for you.” She coos as she makes her way to the window, unlatching it before turning on her light to show a large black figure. “You’re not a cat.” She states plainly. 

“Sorry to disappoint,” Diego says with a sarcastic expression as she blinks and in her buzzed state processes this information.

“What are you doing here? You’re not due for another few weeks at least, right?” She asks, hand on the window sill still, not being raised fully. 

“No I uh… wanted to have you look at that wound again.”

“Oh is it-?” Her mind switches naturally to doctor mode, even if she wasn’t sober and wasn’t nearly as quick or graceful. “Come on in then, let me pause this.” She pushes the window up as he slinks in behind her and she fumbles with the remote. “What seems to be the problem?” She asks with her eyes on his covered torso and hands on her hips. He seemed to be moving fine. 

“Is this a bad time?” He asks seeing the food and wine bottle on the table.

“No, well… I’ve been drinking but I’m FINE.” She insists with a wave of her hand. “Sober enough to help you out at least. I was just watching tv.” She excuses herself.

“Well, I was making sure no one was here with you.”

“HA!” She laughs a bit louder than intended, then clears her throat. “Um, no, no one else here. There never is.” She chuckles. 

“What about the cat?”

“Oh! Well, I suppose he would count as having a man over.” She offers a warm, sleepy expression that gave away that she was a bit drunk. “Well I mean there’s you. But I don’t know if you count as having someone over since I’ve never invited you.” She makes herself chuckle. 

“You told me to come in just now didn’t you?” He teases. 

“Yeah but...you came through the window I don’t think that counts.”

“Window? Door? Both lead to the same place, what’s the big difference?” He asks sarcastically, he was a bit relieved she seemed in a good mood but was hoping she wasn’t a mean drunk if she got mad at the topic of discussion he had on the table tonight. 

“Societal expectations? Cultural… rules?” She offers and waves her hands. “Don’t make me think of words right now just- what do you need? What's wrong?” She moves towards him focusing herself up.

“The wound was a gunshot wound right? We pulled the slug out?”

“I pulled it out, but yes, go on.” she waits for him to raise his shirt as he talks. 

“I’ve noticed something weird when I come to you for help Doc.” He lifts it to show a recovered body. “These things keep healing... and fast. I need to know how you’re doing that because I’ve been losing sleep over it.” His tone was harsher and she felt the energy in the room shift. 

She leans forward to make sure she’s seeing clearly. They were healed. Pink scars over the newest and the wounds from over a month ago now we’re barely visible.

A bubble of acid rose in her throat as she stood back up, and it wasn’t from the drinking. 

He sees her body language change drastically. It’s like he’d hit her the way she slunk back to rest on the back of the couch. 

She takes a shaky breath to compose herself as a lifetime of fears and questions flood between her now glassy eyes. “I... don't know…” she forces out a whisper. 

“I think I deserve an explanation here.” He says taking a step towards her as she quickly wipes away a falling tear to hide it from him. 

“I don’t have one.” She begins to cry. The past trauma of being confronted and abused for the weird things that happened to her when she was young come at her as his intimidating body language moves closer. 

“I think you do…” still going with intimidation just in case she was faking. Hand ready to grab a knife if she flinched to attack.

“I don’t.” She shakes her head and covers her face in her hands. “I don’t mean to…” she sniffles and moves to teach for a tissue. “It’s just... a thing that happens sometimes and I don’t… I don’t know what... why…” she cries harder this time and his tension shifts. “I’m sorry I’m… I've just been able to get by hoping no one notices it and asks and now…” she motions towards him. “I don’t want it. I don’t want anyone to know, please.” She reaches out and takes his hand. “I don’t want to have to run again. Please.” She holds his forearm as she cries and boldly meets his eyes. 

“What do you mean run?”

“My mom she… I did weird things as a kid and she…made me so scared of it, of myself...of her.” 

“What’d you do?” He quietly asks. Now moving to put his hand over hers and felt her shaking. 

“Afew times when I’ve had traumatic things happen I’ve�� had weird stuff happen. Brought animals back.” She uncomfortably rubs her arms. 

He was piecing it all together in his head. Her career choice made sense, an easy cover for her to just be good at her job and not have to address her abilities since she’d had such fear put into her about it. No father, uncontrolled powers during emotional outbursts. It was all adding up.

“Eve?” His voice was softer this time. “When’s your birthday?”

“My...birthday?” A confused brow appears as she looks up at him. 

“Yeah just...humor me.”

“Uh...okay?” She answers shakily. “October 1st-“

“‘89?” 

She nods. “How did you-?”

He sighs and puts a hand to her back and pats it supportively. “Eve. I think it’s about time we talked.”

Eve watched him curiously, his face seemed to pity her and she hadn’t expected it. He thought he’d either tell her she was full of shit and not believe her. That was her first assumption. The second was he’d kill her because he was an assassin to kill people like her. Some Men In Black type shit. And while she didn’t expect that theory to play out, the arrival of the third option of total acceptance was baffling her. 

“Why did y- how did you know?”

“Because it’s my birthday too.”

“Huh? What are you insinuating?” She wears her confusion unfiltered on her face as she looks up at him and rises from the spot on his chest. 

“Remember when I told you my name? What did you say about the kids in the 90s? The crime-fighting super powered ones…?” He winces. 

He sees the realization wash over her face.

“We all had the same birthday...October 1st, 1989. I was that Diego... I Am that kid….was that kid. right? I mean I’m a man now-pfft obviously-“

“You’re the fucking Kraken?” Was her loud response as she pushed away to look at his face. 

“Yeah…” he draws out the word and gives a nervous forced smile. “Or Number two… as Dad called us.”

“You...you’re…” she begins repeatedly as she fidgets her fingers in thought. She huffs out a nervous laugh suddenly. “Well, that would... make sense wouldn’t it?” She looked around the room as if it might hold some answers to her bewildering flow of thought. “I just... hold on.” She says with a head shake, the emotional rollercoaster sending her spinning and no longer the alcohol as she moved to fix that. “If I’m gonna deal with this level of shit I’m going to drink more. Because... fuck doing it sober.” She says as she leans to take a bottle of bourbon out of her cabinet and sit back on the couch before cracking it open and downing a large drink.

“You seriously didn’t know you had powers?”

“No! I just thought...I don’t know. I thought I was a good doctor? I guess?” he sighs and takes another shot. 

“You are but... I mean you… really didn’t notice?”

“It has rarely happened at work… and normally I don’t have much of a reason to try to heal people outside of work hours. Until you showed up.”

“So any other times you’ve used the powers?”

“Not at work. Or when I was a kid. I thought I must’ve grown out of it.”

“So..” he twitches his nose in thought, lips parted slightly. “Would that fall under “...occurrences at peak emotional environmental stress instances”?” He repeats back from lessons. 

“Yeah…” she groans and slumps against the couch looking away and shamelessly pouting because denial had been nice. “Fuck.” she shouts up at the ceiling. “I have fucking… “powers”? What the fuck is that even-? I’m not... this isn’t...Nah, it can’t-”

“Eve.” he sits down next to her and grabs her shoulder. “It’s fine.”

“How are you so calm?” she asks almost angrily. “Did you know other people had powers? Like what… how many of us are there? Was I supposed to be adopted? Do I get adopted now? I’m way too old to-“

“Woah. Breathe.” He demands as she begins talking a bit too fast. “I can only answer one at a time.” He extends a supportive raise of his brow. 

“So is there like... a book you can give me. “So you have super powers? A How-to In-depth Guide” by chance?”

“Nope. Just gotta fuck up a bunch trying to figure it out.”

“Oh, that’s just wonderful. I needed more stress in my life.”

He smiles and huffs out a quiet laugh. “So no one else knows?”

“No just… my mom…” she trails off and runs a hand through her hair, covering her almond-shaped eyes for a moment. “This...would explain so much and yet somehow I have even more questions.” She sits up and takes a good long look at her hands. “What’s your power again?” She whispers and turns to face him. 

“Trajectory manipulation mainly.”

“Oh right...yeah, duh the knives.” she hits her forehead and it makes him grin at her. “Sorry I’m a little... this is a lot.”

“Which is why I think we need to try something.” He announces as he stands.

“What?”

“Prove you have powers.” He says standing between her kitchen and living room. 

“I don’t… uh..”

“Every time you’ve used them you’ve been emotional right? A sudden trigger?”

“Yeah…”

“Then there’s the only way to find out.” He says as he quickly takes a knife and cuts his hand.

A loud protest from Eve as she jumped to her feet to react before she even had time to think about it. She took his hands into hers and pulled them to her chest and applied pressure. “You idiot! What are you thinking? There are plenty of other ways to find out!” She shouts as she feels the rush of emotions that come with this unstructured and sudden need for her skills. She’d been off the book when she’d been with him. She’d never had a man stumble to her apartment asking for help, this was something new and it’d made her feel a bit more alive. Like some energy tingling around her nerves inside. She felt the cool flush over her face as they stood close.

“No other way that would get you to react.”

“We really need to discuss your impulsiveness.”

“Focus. Focus on healing it.”

“How?’ I don’t-“

“Yes you do, c’mon. I believe in you.”

She met him with unsure eyes but did as he said. He would know best in this instance, wouldn’t he? If he believed in her, she supposed it was best to follow his lead and believe in him back. 

She holds it close and he feels his muscles twitch. The pain had ceased when she’d clasped him to her, but he wasn’t about to tell her that. She needed to know she could do it. And tough love was the only way he knew how to make powers work because that’s all he’d ever known. She focused and he soon felt a warm wave of contentment wash over him for a fleeting moment. 

“Was that you?” He asks her, her eyes still shut and brow concentrated.

“I…think so?” She says before looking down at his hands with a sigh before revealing them. “Okay,” she whispers before removing her hand where he cut himself. “Is it?” She begins softly, hands gently wiping the blood away. “Let’s wash it, come on.” She drags him steadily to the kitchen sink and there the answer was underneath. The cut was gone. “Holy shit.” She heavily exhales and lets his hand go. 

“That’s… good work.” He says moving his hand in and out of a fist. “Good as before.” He nods in approval as she leans against the counter in shock. “You okay? How ya feeling?”

“Tired.” She nods slowly and meets his gaze. “Shocked. And… hungry.”

“You wanna do something about any of those?” He offers, smiling at her and nudging his head towards the fridge.

“Yeah.” She nods and turns to splash her face with water. “Some real food. Uh, get the blue container and I’m gonna…” she looks around and makes a straight line for her water bottle. “Sit down.” She says to herself and takes a good long drink. He follows her orders and sits next to her, two forks stabbed into a plastic container of noodles. “Yeah, that…” she nods and smacks her lips. “Made me surprisingly tired.”

“That’s normal. Carb up here.” He moves the food to her lap and she doesn’t hesitate.

 After a big laborious bite, she shifts the container between them and offers him to join in. “So what now?”

“Whatever you want.” He shrugs.

“There’s not like some registry I have to get on is there?” 

He laughs in response and assures her there isn’t.

“Does using yours make you tired?” 

“Sometimes. If I have to do a lot at once. Like, stop an army’s worth of bullets in mid-air.”

“You’ve… done that?” her eyes stare unblinking. 

“Oh yeah.” He nods as if it was nothing. When in fact it was one of the harder things he’d ever done with his powers. 

“I want to be able to do that.” she looks at him pitifully. A touch adoringly. “Or whatever my equivalent is to that.”

“You can, you’ve just gotta practice.” She nods as she tries to envision a new future that involved this new knowledge of herself she’d gain. “Start with controlling the emotions. Then learn how you wield it without them.”

“So you don’t have to be, like, angry to throw knives you can just do it.”

“Right.” He smirks and throws a knife with little effort that curved and lands in her coffee table.

“Did you have to stab my coffee table?”

“It’s a casualty you’ll learn to deal with it”.

“I do at work already.” She frowns and takes the knife. 

“How’d you even become a doctor anyway? Were you so good at keeping people alive they just gave you a degree?”

She sputters out a laugh. ”I fucking wish.” The first big laugh he’d seen from her unfolds as she shakes her head not knowing whether to be insulted or not. “I was, am...naturally gifted for it it seems.”

“Isn’t it hard? How’d a girl like you manage to get into med school? You’ve made yourself sound like some little badass.”

“I was a badass.” She grins. “So much so that they threw my badass in jail.” She laughs. “You couldn’t tell my punk-ass nothing. I was a statistic waiting to happen. A young runaway, abusive home, repeat offender, all that shit.” She motions with her hands as she speaks. “But...there was a very tough but fair veterinarian that took me on to do some work for community service and all that. And I ended up being surprisingly good with the animals. She gave me more responsibility, I took it all on and got better. She gave me a chance to be somebody. To prove I was more than stat for the system, y’know. She told me I could do anything I wanted and she’d pay for my tuition. So I did. She got me into college and...here I am.”

“Why a Doctor?”

“To help people.” She shrugs. “As cliche as it is. Thought I was good at it, was told I was a good role model for kids that were like me”

“Yeah, you are.”

“No, I’m just some juiced up mutant with powers to heal. My career is a fraud.” She says only half-joking. 

“Power doesn’t make you good at math. Just ask my brother.” He kids with a smile. 

“Oh god, how many of you were there?”

“Seven.” He nods an answer. 

“And now there’s an 8th-“

“Ninth.” He corrects. “Yeah, there was another, uh person with powers we...met.”

“Oh. Are they a member of the...Uh…?” 

“Umbrella Acad-“

“Umbrella academy” she finishes. 

“No, they’re not.”

“So you don’t have to be?”

“No, but...she kinda disappeared so she couldn’t join.”

“Oh sorry.”

“Nah, it’s cool. No thang.” He badly jokes and he sees she’s already seen through him. “They wanted to leave. So it’s… fine.” He tries to dismiss the subject.

“So uhh…” she pauses and fights a yawn. “I’m really tired. Like, need to sleep right now tired. So…”

“Oh! Do you want me to? Yeah-You need some rest.” He awkwardly separates himself. 

“Before you go-“ she says, turning to face him by the window. “I don’t… want to do this alone.” She says with twiddling fingers. And I’d like your help.”

He nods, “I can help.” He assured her.

“So is there a way I can get ahold of you? A large spotlight  I can put on the roof perhaps?”

“Can’t make those jokes anymore since you’re one of us now.” He wags a finger her way.

“Actually I think that means I can make them all I want.” She grins. 

“I have a cell phone. Like a.. normal person.” He grumbles and takes it out. “What’s your number?” He puts her into his phone. Hers dings from the coffee table. “Problem solved.” He nods and slips it away. 

“I’ll... see you... soon?” She asks with a tilted head.

“Guess we’ll find out won’t we?” He gives a precocious smile and slips out the window silently.

“This mysterious bit is not as charming as you think it is.” She sass's back to an empty fire escape. But he heard her. And knew she wasn’t being entirely convincing.

@s-h-e-w-r-i-t-e-s​ @jaegeeeeer​ @diegos-butt​ @anglovesthis​ 

[jawritter]

Gifted Hands

Part 1

Request: That surgeon Jensen story was so amazing. Bless the anon who requested that & bless you for writing it😂 reading that I had idea, if you could write another Jensen story, maybe it could be the reader having a major surgery and she is scared so Jensen being her surgeon prepping her from like a month? He stays with her while anaesthesia and then takes care of her? Oh oh, you can maybe add some funny, embarrassing moments, like catheter? That sounded weird but it would make an interesting story😂

Warnings: None really in this one. Medical terms, Jensen being adorable, Jensen in scrubs, (Yes that’s a warning damn it!) I think a little language? 

Pairing: Surgeon!Jensen x Reader, OFC Mckayla x Reader

Word Count: 1986

Want More? Check Out My Masterlist!

*****MASTERLIST****

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Sitting in the cold sterile room of the smell of lysol, bleach, and other strong cleansers assaulted your nose. 

Pulling your jacket that you were wearing tighter around you, you looked around the room at the different medical posters and charts that littered the walls of the small cubical type room, trying to move your body as little as possible, because the crinkling sound of the paper underneath you made your skin crawl. 

You hated hospitals, and if it wasn’t for the fact that the pain and discomfort in your hip had gotten just about unbearable you wouldn’t even be here right now. 

You don’t really even remember when it started, but you do remember when it got to the point where you couldn’t ignore it anymore.

You were standing in your living room like you do every day, working on your latest painting before you had to get ready to go downtown for the art exhibit show tonight, when it started as a low ache way deep down in your hip, then worked its way down your leg. Then before you knew it every step was painful, and now here you are. Sitting alone on a cold hospital gurney/bed thing, waiting on the x ray results. 

You don’t know how you could have possibly hurt yourself. Your job didn’t exactly require a whole lot of physical activities. You painted, you stood a lot, you walked around in heels, which was honestly the most dangerous part of the job. 

You didn’t go to the gym all the time, you didn’t run a marathon, you didn’t do anything to cause this, so why were you here? Was the universe just against you or something?

It probably wouldn’t be so bad if you had someone here to help you, someone in town you could call on to stay here with you and keep you company. 

Alas though you didn’t have a soul. You were a loner by nature, and you really had no family left after your mom passed away several years ago. So that means it’s just you. You are all you have to count on. 

You were seriously about to go and ask the nurse sitting out at the desk in front of the room you were sitting at if they had lost your results, because it felt like it was taking forever when a you heard a knocking sound on the door before it opened. 

“Hello Miss Y/L/N sorry to have kept you waiting, I’m Mckayla, the physicians assistant on call for tonight. You shook the woman’s hand and made a failed attempt to smile back at her, but you were just ready to get the hell away from here. So your anxiety made it kind of hard to put on a show as good as you wanted to. 

“How are you feeling? Did the medication they have you when you took your x rays help with the pain level?” She asked you, looking over your charts.

You nodded your head when she looked up at you for your answer. 

“Some, but honestly it’s still there in the background always. Just more bearable.” You told her and she nodded at you for a moment.

“Well from what I can tell from you x ray results, you have what is called Hip Dysplasia.” She said matter of factly the way medical people tended to do, like you where just supposed to know what the fuck they were talking about, like everyone had taken the same damn classes they had, and that’s why we sit in these God forsaken places and wait for them to come in and tell us shit that makes no sense what so ever, and expect us to know what the hell they’re talking about. 

Before you could asked her to dumb that down for you, another man in scrubs entered your room. Holding a clipboard and what looked like a copy of your x ray.

This man was absolutely the most beautiful man that you had ever laid eyes on.

Perfect bowed legs that went all the way up and made a tight little ass of themselves. That seemed to show itself off insultingly perfectly in those dark blue scrubs he was wearing. A thin waist, that turned into a thick chest and shoulders. Going up to make a perfect God-like face on an absolutly lickable neck and jawline. What skin you could see was scattered with freckles. His eyes the most piercing green you’d ever seen. His perfect pink lips pressed tightly together. Brow furrowed in concentration as he looked over the paperwork in front of him. The man was sin on legs. You were certain he was probably illegal in some states to be that damn gorgeous. 

“What my coworker here means to say is. Your hip socket doesn't fully cover the ball portion of the upper thigh bone.” 

He flipped on the light on the x-ray projector and threw up your x-ray. Pointing at your hip joint with the back of his pin. 

“It’s something people are born with, but don’t even know they have it until they’re adults. It makes it really easy for your hip to pop completely out of socket, and therefore causing you a great deal of pain. Your hips are currently out of place. That’s the result of the pain you feel.” 

Blinking to clear your head from the green eyes that were holding you captive. You cleared your throat and asked him what most people would be more worried about than how fucking hot your the man is. 

“Well how do we fix it?” You asked him, and he smiles at you softly. Making your heart flutter in your chest. 

“Well the only cure for it is surgery to correct the condition. I could pop your hip back in place, and send you home, but you’d be right back here in a month or less with the same problem.”

Coming over the gurney you were sitting on he feels around on your hip bone gently, and you repress the shudder that wants to so desperately rip through your body at his touch.

“My name is Jensen by the way, I’m the head surgeon here, I’ll be the one performing the operation.” He said. Giving you another warm smile before removing his hands from you, taking notes on his little clipboard.  

“Wait, wait, I can’t have surgery! I have NO ONE to help me at home, I live alone. How bad is this surgery? Is it like a day surgery? Will I wake up and be fine to take care of myself?”

Jensen places a reassuring hand on your knee and your momentarily distracted form you minor panic attack at the thought of surgery. 

“Mckayla why don’t you give me a minute here with Miss…” 

“Y/n.”

“Y/n, and I’ll fill her in on her options and recovery time, all that stuff.” Jensen said. Looking over his shoulder at Mckayla. She nods at him and leaves the room. Jensen waiting until she shuts the door before talking to you again. 

“Listen I don’t want you to panic, but this is a pretty major surgery. The cut is pretty invasive, just about a two or three inch cut right above the groin, and a cut about the same size right above the buttox. It does take quite a bit of recovering though. It’s about a five to seven day stay in the hospital post op, and it takes about three to six weeks to get to where you are moving around pretty good again. You will have to do some physical therapy too. So you don’t have ANYONE that can help you?” Jensen said. His hand is still resting on your knee. 

Shaking your head you didn’t speak at first, you didn’t want to cry in front of him, but you were feeling a little overwhelmed by the information he just gave you. How were you going to live alone, and recover from this? This was impossible. 

“I don’t have anyone. I live alone, and I don’t have any family or friends I can really call.. I don’t know how I’m going to do this.” 

Jensen looked you over, his face calm. His features seemed almost… Sad…

“Well the preop takes about a month to get you ready for. I’m going to reset your hip the best I can today, but we’re going to have to have you come in and i’m going to have to take regular x rays, so that I can monitor how your hip is moving now, and determine from there what it’s going to take me to fix it.” Jensen took a deep breath, looking around the room for a moment like he was lost in thought before looking back at you.

“Do me a favor sweetheart, do the surgery, don’t worry about the recovery and all that, let me do the surgery, and we’ll figure out the rest as it comes. I don’t want to see you in pain, when I can fix it. Okay?”

“Jensen I don’t think you understand I have no one at all to help me, this is going to put me down for a long time… I don’t know what to do…” 

Putting your head in your hands you took a deep breath, willing yourself not to start bawling like a big baby.

“Y/n.” Jensen’s deep voice was gentle when it spoke to you again. “Listen to me. If I have to I’ll take care of you until you get back on your feet. Okay? I’m not going to let you be left alone in this recovery.”

Looking up at him you were a little confused by what you heard. 

“Jensen you can’t stop your whole life to take care of me for three to six weeks. I’m a complete stranger! We don’t even know each other!” 

“Y/n, stop worrying. I know asking you to trust me is a lot, but I want to do this, please let me do this.” 

You looked at him confused for a moment. 

“How do I know I can trust you, why do you want to do this?” 

Jensen smiled at you again softly. “Sweetheart you can trust me I promise. I’m not going to take you somewhere and murder you ro something… There’s just something about you… I don’t know… I can’t put my finger on it, but I want to help you, so please, will you let me help you?”

Taking a deep breath you nod your head finally. Deciding you had no choice but to trust this gorgeous stranger that was quickly becoming your very own little guardian angel apparently. 

“Okay, Okay, Fine. I’ll do it, but on one condition.” You tell him and he takes his hands away from leg and leans on the gurney closer to you than was probably medically professional, but you didn’t mind at all. I mean this man was breathtaking..

“What’s that?” He asked. A smirk gracing those beautiful pink lips that you wanted more than anything to kiss right now. 

“Can you knock me out before you pop my hip back in place, because I’ve heard that really hurts.” You tell him. Fear crossing your face before you could control it.

“Sweetheart, while we’ve been talking I’ve been slowly working your hip back into place. You didn’t even notice it, but I popped it back in place a few minutes ago..” He said. A proud smirk still on his face. His eyes searching yours.

You looked down at your hip, then back up at him. Jensen had a full on chester cat grin now. Laughing at you under his breath.

“But… How did you…”

Holding up his hands in front of you for you to see before falling back into a full body laugh that you could very easily fall in love with.

“I’m a surgeon. Gifted hands sweetheat.”

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Read Part 2 here!!

Gifted Hands Pt. 2

Tag List:

@deanwanddamons​ @imabitch4jensen​ @rvgrsbrns​ @bi-danvers0​

[nyndelion]

hmmm... mob psycho 100, serirei and shou! you don’t have to do all of them ofc

im doing all of them bc i love them ah

001 | Mob Psycho 100

Favorite character: this is so difficult, dont make me choose.... anyway, top three: Shigeo, Teru and Reigen

Least Favorite character: any adult character that feels like its ok to brutally attack teenagers??????? i dont think thats ok even if they are espers.

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): serirei, terumob, ritshou

Character I find most attractive: hhh serizawa and reigen bc im gay :-)

Character I would marry: well ok first of all i dont wanna marry irl but.... serizawa

Character I would be best friends with: almost all of them!! i think i would vibe with Tome, i’d think of myself as her big sibling she could look up regarding lgbt stuff (along with reigen i guess)

a random thought: i was just talking w my partner about how mp100 changed our way to watch anime and i told them i probably wont bother to watch any other anime if it isnt as good

An unpopular opinion: mmh.... idk.... i think Matsuo should have been more explored as a character

My Canon OTP: is Serizawa canon enough? (this show doesnt have any relationships shown except for shigeo and ritsu’s parents now that i think about it)

My Non-canon OTP: this is tricky, how can you prove any of my otps arent canon?...

Most Badass Character: Clearly Shigeo has the biggest most raw powers, but he’s most badass in his character development i think, in the way he sees the world, how he as a main character manages to skip all the “i’m a misunderstood and lonely person bc of my powers” and realize he is the person he is bc he has people around that loves and cherishes him as he is, and that way he feels compelled to be good and kind and the best version of himself.... Epic. Also Reigen is badass bc as ridiculous a character he is, with dubious morals and a lying habit, he is a good person overall and also would die for his loved ones. And idk how he can get away with everything tbh, my mind explodes anytime he twists words and ends up winning arguments, like sir... thats a mad skill right there

Most Epic Villain: Shigeo’s hidden emotions could count as a villain? idk

Pairing I am not a fan of: anything creepy and Bad .... you know the ones.

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): idk really, i cant think of anyone. But i remember i was thinking how there arent a lot of female characters, even if the ones it has are super amazing and good... i would like if there were more, and also more explicit nonbinary characters as well... and explicit trans and gnc ones if we are here already...

Favourite Friendship: the entire Body Improvement Club! they all are precious and good pals.

Character I most identify with: Shigeo and Serizawa

Character I wish I could be: sometimes I wish i was as eloquent as Reigen, but then i remember separation arc and its like... no sir. I guess I’d like to be Serizawa to have a job i am good at where the people there know my struggles and are committed to support me through it

002 | Serirei

When I started shipping them: like a month and a half ago? I thought they were cute together a lot of time ago, but it was when i started hardly hyperfixating on mp100 when i was like *eyes emoji* over serirei. Watching the OVA and then reading the manga and all the theories supporting the thesis that its a slow burn coworkers to friends to lovers made me go ♥♥♥♥♥♥

My thoughts: they are dumbasses in LOVE

What makes me happy about them: their interactions overall are priceless, they balance each other a lot and give each other a sense of purpose and stability. Also, i project a little on serizawa and reigen is... y’know.... a flamboyant kind of dude.... which is my type, so.....

What makes me sad about them: the angst when thinking reigen could doubt his feelings or actions around serizawa, worrying over he isnt manipulating him into thinking he is in love, and serizawa thinking he isnt enough for reigen bc he is too nervous about not having enough relationship experience.....

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: when they picture them realizing they have feelings for each other bc they are jealous thinking they could be dating other ppl. I am polyamorous so i Do Not vibe with this trope At All

Things I look for in fanfic: pining... longing.... yearning.... then kiss... fluff.... thats enough to make me cry tbh

My wishlist: (idk what this is about so im skipping hh)

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: idk??? there arent many other characters they have that many chemistry...

My happily ever after for them: they start a thematic restaurant together! bc reigen loves cooking and with their success in Spirits & Such he decides to become a chef and Serizawa works with him, while also attending people’s troubles with spirits. They keep their contact with Shigeo and the rest of the kids and go on trips with them often. They see them grow up and become good people that go after their dreams, and are there for them if they have any trouble or are going though a rough patch.

003 | Shou

How I feel about this character: I feel like i have to protect him, but i guess he wouldnt accept it xd it makes me sad he has such an awful dad, and that it will probably lead to suffering to him as he grows up, bc that kind of abuse can really fuck you up, specially when you have to act like an adult to your parents at such a young age

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: ritsu! they just click together, and i love how their relationship is depicted as super funny by other people. They are best friends first and over all, but also are in love.

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: Its more of a headcanon but with Serizawa! I think he would get protective of Shou and try to check up on him from time to time, but Shou would do the same for him bc he is worried at how his dad treated him and the thing he said the last time they saw him. But actually they are projecting their own need to be protected on the other, so it ends up being kinda messy, but then they become friends and are able to laugh and do other stuff that doesnt include talking about Shou’s dad and Claw

My unpopular opinion about this character: i refer to him as redhead goku instead of jonny test xd

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: that his feelings about his dad were explored more deeply, and also the thing i said before about Serizawa, i think that would have been spot on and could be a character development thing for both

Favorite friendship for this character: Ritsu!

My crossover ship: .... sasuke?

[thechocoboos]

Could you do the chocobros (+Ardyn and Ravus) taking care of their significant other while she's on her period?

These hcs have been sitting in my google docs for a week now--but hey, they’re ready!!! I ended up with eight pages of headcanons so brace yourself lol; wrote these while i was suffering from the very thing i was writing about. what a life.

HC: The Bros + Ardyn and Ravus taking care of their SO on their period!

Noctis

Noct knew that periods existed, he swore that he did, but he just kinda… forgets.

So when he came home to see you dying on your couch, he was just… ??? “Uh, babe? You okay?”

“NO, Noct, I’m not o-fucking-kay--”

“Uh.”

It was only when he called Ignis that he figured out what was going on, with Ignis exasperatedly having to remind Noct that hey, people get periods!

It was a short phonecall, luckily

And it didn’t take Noct too long to get with the program

Softness increases to 110%

Mutual laziness increases to 70%

Caring for his SO increases to 2000%

He does his best--but he also kinda. Just. I dont wanna say it but he doesn’t think it’s that big of a deal until he sees you crying over cramps, then he realizes that periods suck and that you just need your stupid boyfriend to give you the love and support that you deserve

After that, he gets better!!!

“NoCT, can you please go get me my meds? And some water--”

“Can’t you do it yourself--” He always freezes, remembering how bad it can be, “Shit, sorry, babe--” He already started getting up, bringing out a bit of your favorite snack as an apology, “You know I’m an idiot.” He said when he handed you your meds and your fave candy bar

You know, and for whatever reason, you still loved him

He kinda has to learn what to do and what not to do just because he feels too unsure to ask anyone

Unfortunately, it was also through trial and error that he realized how sensitive you can sometimes be when your period is knockin’ at the front door

He found out through multiple crying sessions--and yes, it was usually his fault, but he was always insanely good about making it up to you with food, cuddles, and movie marathons

He’s the boyfriend who goes to the store for tampons and pads for you, sees the giant aisle of them, and while he isn’t embarrassed to be seen buying shit for his SO, he has absolutely no idea what to get and literally grabs the first shit he sees

And of course, you send him right back with a picture of the brand you actually like and a pad in his hand just so he can get it right the second time

Cue the mental image of Noctis comparing the pad in his hand to the color of pad packaging in stores

“They’re both green so it’s gotta be right… right???”

In summary: Noctis is a dumbass and can be a bit insensitive about periods simply because he’s really not around women or anyone who gets periods, but he really does try to remedy his ignorance and any mistakes he makes

Prompto

Prompto, too, has never really had much experience with girls or periods or people with periods and he just. He tries so hard--he really does

He gets you a new teddy bear every single time (at some point, you know you’re gonna have to tell him that he can’t keep buying you new bears, but it’s so cute that you don’t want him to stop)

He’s the one who gets sympathy pain

I promise, the second he catches wind that you’re on your period, he’s out the door trying to find your favorite of everything

If you send him to the store for pads, he comes back with one of everything and lots of tears in his eyes, “Babe--I didn’t know what you wanted so I just bought everything im sorry oh gods”

He’s the pitiful soul who blushes as he buys all the pads and tampons and looks like he’s gonna cry

He’s the one who pulls a cart full of sanitary products to the first register he sees and is crying as he looks in the clerk’s eyes and cries, “My SO is on their period i dont know what they like help me please”

Christ, he’s a mess but he’s your mess and you love him

He comes back with every single snack he knows you so much as look at

Cravings? He’s got your back.

Like, you mention this shit you want half heartedly and then he disappears for three hours and comes back with a weighted blanket, heating pad, and three bags of those weird chips you were craving

He’s always blushing and frantic, but he blushes the hardest when you ask him to lay with you and cuddle

Ofc he does it--he loves it, but the bold, straightforward way you ask has him blushing head to toes

He once caught himself wishing people got periods more often just so he could hold you like this more often--he accidentally said it out loud, and you only snuggled into his chest more and told him to shut up and hold you tighter

Prompto is a mess but he tries so, so hard just to make you comfortable and content

He once drove for twenty minutes to find your favorite candy bar (and he would do it again, no question)

When you cry bc emotions, he starts to tear up, too

He always says, “Babe, if you cry, I’ll start crying and then we’ll both be crying and I don't think either of us can handle that on an emotional level” and then you both cry anyways

He likes to sing to you when you guys cuddle, his voice is soft but husky in the perfect way that lulls you to sleep

If you fall asleep in his arms, he falls asleep, too

He’s the extra bf who goes above and beyond unnecessarily, merely because he doesn’t know how else to help you

Gladdy

Holy Behemoth Batman! One of these idiots is properly aware of periods!!!

And it’s this one. Bravo, Gladdy, bravo. Fans everywhere are cheering your name.

In all seriousness, he is aware and actually knows how to handle someone who is on their period

Iris used to get some pretty bad periods, and with their mom not around and their dad always busy, it was Gladio who had to help her out and actually explain them to her in the first place (he’s never gonna forget when Iris ran up to him one morning while crying and shouting about bloody underwear)

So, needless to say, he ain’t shy during that time of the month. In fact, he knows more tips and tricks than you do, simply because he was one hell of a big bro for Iris

Heating pads? Blankets? Snacks? Damn good brands of sanitary products? He’s got it all and you didn’t even have to ask, like holy shit

Back when you guys were just starting out your relationship, you had actually gotten your period once while at his place and when you told him you’d have to go home because you forgot your products, he was like, “Oh--hang on. You prefer pads or tampons???” and pulls out a giant basket with a lobster on it, labelled ‘Menstruation Crustacean’

He said that he liked to be prepared in case Iris was over

What an absolute legend of a bf. Like, after that, you knew you weren’t letting this fucker go.

He rubs your stomach if you’re having really bad cramps and doesn’t even have to be asked to go grab you some pain meds--it’s like he has a sixth sense or some shit

Really, really chill about periods as a whole like he’s not scared to go to the store for you and he gets the right products!!!

Sometimes, when you get so sore and crampy that you can’t move, he’ll carry you around in his arms and doesn’t complain once

Will change your bloody sheets and isn’t the slightest bit grossed out--doesn’t mind emptying the bathroom trashcan either

Similar to Prompto, he loves to hold you and hum to you. He won’t sing, but even his absent minded humming while he holds you to his chest under one arm and reads some random book lulls you to sleep with ease

Quite frankly, probably the best of the bros when it comes to periods

He’s not scared of them. He doesn’t care if it gets messy, he knows what to do, like. Shit. Fuckin’ winner over here.

Ignis

Ignis, much like everyone else, does not have that much experience with periods. Didn’t really have many folks with periods around and he’s never had a SO before

So you would think he’s a hot mess--but nO! He would nEvER

He googled and he googled and he googled and he asked coworkers (always respectfully ofc) and he googled some more

He has an arsenal of tips and tricks and guides and everything--but he does lack the hands on experience

He will help you and he will buy you everything you need and more--but there will always be the hesitation of someone who doesn’t really know what they’re doing

One time, Ignis tried to rub your belly to help with cramps, but he only succeeded in tickling you and embarrassingly had to admit he doesn’t really know where his hand should be

Ugh what a cutie pie

He’s patient and sweet and he does all these small things for you without even telling you, and when you do notice, you feel like your heart is just gonna burst and vomit affection everywhere

He’s still a little embarrassed and shy when you boldly demand cuddles, but he does it nonetheless (he fucking loves it though he will never admit to it)

He’s the SO who cleans up bloody sheets and quietly gets blood stains out of your clothes while you’re vomiting from cramps, but never, ever makes a big deal out of it and does it with the caring affection of a kind man in love

Bumps his pun game to 110% to try and make you laugh

Knows which subjects and what phrases and words to avoid to prevent your emotions from blowing up

Even if they do, he never takes rude words to heart and he always comforts you lovingly, giving you a warm hug and a kiss on the cheek

He keeps an eye on you

If you shift uncomfortably, he’s there with a heating pad

If you’re meds are wearing off, he already has more in hand

Sometimes, if you want to cuddle, you only have to look at him a certain way before he’s sighing and climbing into bed next to you, reminding you that if you were anyone else he wouldn’t go this far

He just dotes on you in the quietest ways possible

Ravus

Insensitive Dumbass Part 2

Yes, he knows people get periods. Does he care? No.

Not until he falls in love with you, at least.

Cramps? Can’t be that bad. Migraines? Just mere headaches. Aches and pains? Probably nothing. He dismisses each symptom right up until you come into his life

Because when you guys get together--he gets to see firsthand just how bad everything can get

Oh gods you’re crying from it all?? VOmitting??? HOW WAS HE SUPPOSED TO KNOW--

He felt like a right dick (and he should)

But he was also quick to change his tune, because the love of his life can’t suffer like this

Not while he’s around!!!

He’s quick to ask Luna what to do, and thank god at least one sibling in their family is sympathetic and not a mess and a fucking half otherwise he’d be doing things through trial and error (not that he didn’t, even with the help)

He does everything by the written list Luna had given him (she knew he wasn’t gonna remember everything), even years after you two got together (he likes to use it as a benchmark of sorts to know when he’s doing everything you need)

The first few times you had sent him to the store because you ran out of supplies, he had absolutely no idea what to get and any poor employees who tried to help him earned the most aggressive, hostile glare he could muster

He ends up calling Luna, too, because how is he supposed to call you and tell you that he doesn’t know what to get??? And have you think he’s incapable??? NO! He was gonna be the best bf and get exactly what you fucking needed or so help him--

He’s just very aggressively in love. Little bit of a dick but he changes and grows as a person into the kinda man we can all love and support and who will love and support us right back!!!

He does his best but he doesn’t want to seem incapable of being helpful

Likes to remind you when your medicine is supposed to wear out so he can show that he’s some use

Anytime he gives you a massage or rubs your back or smth, he’s always giving you nervous, uncertain glances just to make sure you’re content or that he’s helping

Always giving you nervous glances just to check that you’re okay (he really loves you, he’s just not sure how to show it)

Lots of hugs and kisses but he’s embarrassed about all the skinship when you want cuddles (don’t get him wrong, he really, really loves it; he’s just… not sure what to do with all these feelings)

He learns how to be a supportive, wonderful SO when you’re on your period and maybe one day he might actually remember your favorite brand (but don’t get your hopes up too much at that)

Ardyn

Back in Ardyn’s day, periods weren’t exactly talked about, so the first few times you mentioned them, he was absolutely flabbergasted that you would blatantly talk about something that was considered so private

If he hadn’t been a healer, he wouldn’t have known near as much about them as he did

But even as a healer, periods were still something considered a woman’s subject and were usually left for women healers and mothers to handle so he could rarely do much

But then--Ardyn had to get pretty fuckin’ used to periods because you were pretty much out of commission when your “aunt irma” came to visit

First couple times you got your period while with Ardyn, they weren’t so bad, but then they went right back to their normal symptoms

When Ardyn came home to see you curled up in a ball, clutching your abdomen and trying to just keep your eyes shut to block out the light, he had thought you were terribly, terribly sick

“Darling--what’s wrong? What happened--” He was genuinely concerned and worried, his brow furrowed and mouth drawn in a worried frown. He hadn’t realized that your periods were so debilitating, so to see you like this, he had thought something even worse had happened

You only managed a groan when you tried to talk, and that only made him rush over even more, trying to lift your arms to see where you were injured, “Darling, please--”

“‘M fine,” you tried to say, “It’s just--fuck,” You hissed as a particularly bad cramp came your way, “--fine, jus’, that time of the month.” You wheezed, laying your head back down on your pillow

And that was when Ardyn realized just how terrible the symptoms could be

He was a worried man. Absurdly worried actually, and sometimes it made you want to laugh if everything didn’t hurt so badly

Ardyn was the kind of man to do absolutely anything and everything for his love, so that’s what he did

You never had to leave the bed for anything unless you really wanted to

Ardyn would deliver your pain meds on the clock, always accompanied by the most ridiculously jeweled goblet he could find (he was always one to be amusingly over the top and treat you like a queen, but his dramatics always cheered you up)

He was usually by your side unless you requested some alone time, and then he would respectfully kiss your forehead, say “Of course, darling. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to call--I am always at your disposal,” and close the door quietly as he left

Otherwise, he would be laying in bed with you, one arm wrapped around your shoulder and the other holding some old book or resting across his stomach as he took a nap beside you

He would give you massages wherever you ached and he would provide herbal remedies from back in his day that were pretty good at relieving aches and pains

Ardyn’s innuendos and teasings would go on the back burner during this time--unless you instigated it

If you didn’t, he might tease you here and there, but always the tiniest, most light hearted things and it was always said in the softest teasing tones

All your feelings are valid to him, hormonal or otherwise, and he will listen to every word you say as though they were your last

Yes, you were usually treated like royalty by him, but it somehow increased exponentially when that time of the month arrived

[queenofthearchitect]

You did what?

This was requested by: @biforrollynch

Request: Hiiiiii idk if youd be comfortable with this request but could i have a seth/Oc fic where the girl has relapsed and harmed herself after a couple years being clean and she doesnt wanna tell seth but he notices and she thinks seth is gonna leave her for it and she hates herself until seth makes her see shes everything? ofc he doesnt leave her and he helps her through it and tells her how important she is to him and how much he loves her??

Warnings: cussing, self harm, angst, fluff

Trigger warning: despression, and self harming. Self harming and something everyone deals with some point in their life and if you are dealing with it please talk I love you guys.

Tag list. @theworldofotps @writtingrose @new-zealand-chic @sassyspacedust @wolfiegal98 @haharollins @the-beastslayers-queen

Please enjoy 🦖

Seth was gone on again, I felt alone even though he was a phone call away it just wasn’t the same. I was downstairs elbowdeep in dishwater when my phone dinged, I walked over to it and it was from WWE and I clicked it and my stomach dropped Seth and his coworker Becky Lynch were smiling together and a little to close if you ask me. I put my phone down and tried to calm myself, I continued washing dishes when I got pulled from my thoughts. I grabbed my phone again and I saw it was from Twitter this time I opened it, I saw the same picture from the WWE of Seth and Becky.

I read some of the comments, Seth had always told me not to because of it the jealous fans but I always did and this time I knew he was right. I took about 10 minutes to read some of the comments when I had enough I threw my phone and I went upstairs, i wiped the tears from my eyes. I grabbed my razor blade and I slid the blade across my hip, I felt the anxiety leave my body but it was filled with another emotion that was regret. I knew cutting myself was not only hurting me but it was hurting Seth and I’s relationship.

After I cute myself the first time, I kept thinking what would happen if Seth saw and what if he left me? I can’t loose him. I walked to the mirror pulled the top of my shorts down and I slid the blade slowly across my skin at first but then I moved quickly while I put five more lines down my hip. A few hours Seth had came home, and my stomach dropped I stared at my now new cuts and I quickly cleaned the blood and I put on some shorts, when he came into the bedroom, he smiled at me and kissed my head. “Hey beautiful did you miss me? I’ve missed you.” I nodded and I kissed his lips.

He pulled away from the kiss and raised an eyebrow. “Okay Olivia what’s going on?” I looked up and him and forced a fake smile “nothing babe I’m fine.” He pursed his lips together and looked into my eyes. “Olivia have you been crying?” I got out of his grasp and I moved away from him. “I said I’m fine Seth okay.” I sighed and I walked out the bed room. I was fighting back tears, for the first time in a long time I felt ugly and it was my fault.

I was cooking downstairs for Seth, I reached for a bowl on the top self little did I know Seth was walking into the kitchen at the time. “Olivia what is that?” I grabbed the bowl and got off my tippy toes, I turned and looked at him. “What’s, what baby?” *i looked at him and smiled while he his hands rested right above my ass. “These Olivia.” He raises my shirt some and pulled my shorts down a little bit. “That Olivia, why did you do that?” My smile dropped a little bit more and more while he waited for my response.

“It’s not important Seth it’s not a big deal, I don’t want to make something out of nothing.” I slipped out of his arms and continued to make dinner. “It’s not important my ass, also it may not be a big deal to you but it is to me.” I sighed and I continued to toss the salad I was currently making. “Seth look I love you and I would love to talk to you but I don’t think you would understand.” He let out a scoff and crossed his muscular arms. “Olivia I can you just have to let me in, you’ve shut everyone out and won’t let anyone in.”

I looked at me and I let out a laugh. “Yeah and when I shut everyone out you were the first to leave.” Before I could even take a breath he started talking. “Olivia that’s not fair and you know it, I told you why I left.” I rolled my eyes while I kept tossing the salad. “Yeah and I’m sure you went straight to her when you did.” I turned around and crossed my arms while leaning against the countertop looking at him. “Her? Who’s her Olivia cause I didn’t ever cheat on you.” I pushed some hair behind my ear and I was trying to keep calm but I couldn’t any longer.

“Becky, becky is the her, I seen the picture of you and her together WWE made a post and it soon got to me by some fans and a few of our coworkers, you guys looked happy together.” He put his arms down and walked over and wrapped his arms around me. “S-So what your saying is you did this over me?” I looked up at him and then laid against his chest. “No Seth I didn’t do it over you, I did it because the comments that were made and what our coworkers implied.”

I scoffed and I shoftedbme weight on my other side. “Seth you don’t get it, I don’t like her all up on you.” “Olivia your jealous really? I haven’t given you a reason to doubt me at all who cares what others say.” I looked at him and shook my head and I walked towards the door with Seth hot on my heels. I went to our bed room and I grabbed my car keys and put on some shoes, Seth kept calling my name and kept asking where I was going but I didn’t answer him. I wasn’t going to let him see me cry.

I drove and sat in the Waffle House parking lot and my phone kept going off, I had ten miss calls from Seth and at least fifteen text messages from him. I was going to givebin to him like I always did if he didn’t anything from my point of view then there was no more use of arguing, I was tired of it all I don’t know what to do anymore. I was pulled from my thoughts when my phone started going off and I looked at it and I saw the caller ID and answered it. “hello?” I waited before my best friend Renee finally spoke. “Hey girly Seth called dean and he told me to call you so thats why I’m calling not that I don’t love you.”

I smiled at her words and I start playing with my hair while I explained to her what happened, I got myself up all worked up again. I started crying but Renee told me not to, she gave me great advice to just cool off then just go back home cause apparently Seth was worrying himself sick. I rolled my eyes and hung up my phone. I turned my car back on I start to drive home, I saw a Starbucks and I pulled into it he could wait a little bit longer. Starbucks always seemed to help calm me down I don’t know if it was the smell of coffee or just drinking it.

After I got my White chocolate mocha with whip cream from Starbucks I got in my car and I head back home, when I arrived home I felt anxious. I got out of my car with my Starbucks in hand, I decided to just ignore him until I drank my drink cause I’m emotionally drained. I didn’t want to argue anymore but I’m not about to get talked to like I was a child. I twisted the doorknob and I walked inside, I put my keys on the key ring and stopped in my tracks when I seen dinner was done with a little note I picked it up and quickly read it.

Olivia.

When ever you want to talk I’m upstairs in the bed room, I’ve already eaten so don’t worry about me you eat and I’ll clean up okay by the way the chicken was great and so was the salad. I love you!

~ your boyfriend Seth

I just say the note down and I continued to sip on my mocha, I made a plate and started eating. After I was finished I started putting the food away and I started doing dishes, Seth came downstairs and looked at me “hey babe I know your probably still upset but I just worry about you and I love you and if anything ever happened to you.” I sipped on my coffee and continued doing dishes. “Olivia I don’t think I did anything to deserved the silent treatment.” I looked at him and put the dishes on the dishstrainer. “Seth I know you care but your not my dad okay, I love the fact that you care but you don’t see anything from my view.”

He sighed and held me closer letting his body warmth wrap around me, taking his scent in making me calm down some. “Babe I know what you mean I just wanted to let you know I’m only in love with you and no one will ever pull us apart.” I looked up at him, I pulled him down and our lips connected. When we pulled away both of us breathing heavily. “Seth I know I just so scared you are going to leave eme for some one else, that’s why I hid the cuts from you and I didn’t intend on you to find them cause I’m always scared your going to leave me.”

He smiled softly at me and left a small little peck on my lips, he pull me to the couch with him. “Olivia I would never leave you, I’m always going to love you through anything, I’m not going to let one little slip up chase me away and not love you because I do Olivia and I plan on making you my wife one day.” I smiled at him and snuggled into him. “Promise?” He smiled softly and started rubbing my shoulder. “I promise Olivia I won’t ever let anything come between us but you got to start talking to me about things instead of cutting okay babe.” I nodded my head and I kissed his neck and down his shoulder and shown his arm.

“How did I get so lucky to have you Seth Rollins?” He smiled and kissed my head. “Well if it makes you feel any better baby I haven’t always been this way, it’s taken a lot of growth and me growing up to get to where I am and now that I have you I don’t plan on doing anything to screw that up.” I smiled and sat in his lap and smashed our lips together. “I love you Seth Rollins.” He smiled at me and wrapped his arms around my waist. “I love you Olivia so much, now come on let’s go cuddle.” I nodded and he stood up with my legs wrapped around his waist and while he carried me to our bed room where spent all night making up for our fighting.

A/N: I finally got this done and I loved writing it, I hope you all enjoy it and I love you guys so much for all the support and love y’all give me, life gets in the way but you guys and writing are my get away so I’m so greatful also sorry if this was long I wanted to make this one fic instead of 2. ❤️❤️

[roguesandsaviors]

The Past Always Comes Back to Haunt

Fandom: Solace, The Red Road

Characters: Joe Merriweather, Andrea “Andy” Dawkins (OFC), Phillip Kopus

Summary: Andy loves her job at the FBI. She is good at what she does. She keeps the lid shut on the past as much as she can. Even if one Phillip Kopus haunts her dreams. It seems that it isn’t only her dreams that he is going to haunt.

Rating: SFW

Warnings: Cursing, violence, character death

Word count: 3,469

Bingo squares filled: Cop, Unrequited Love, Angst

Author’s Note: The first of many items that will be submitted to the Jason Momoa and Jeffrey Dean Morgan Summer Bingo Challenge. This crosses off several squares for me and was the first idea that came to mind when I began brainstorming. It’s full of angst as a fair warning. The flow was a little choppy but I actually like the way this one came out. At the end of the fic, there is also a little aesthetic/moodboard thing I made. @robinreadsallthefanfiction

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I looked down at my hands. It didn’t register in my mind that the blood that covered them was my own. There was pain but numbness was overwhelming the pain. It was spreading further and further throughout my torso. They said that was common but I never thought that I would be put in that sort of situation. I could vaguely hear what was going on around me but it was muffled at best. There were more gunshots happening around me, though it was dying down. The world slipped a bit as my feet couldn’t stay under me anymore.

“Shit.” Strong hands pulled me back. “Come on Andy. you gotta stay with me. Do you hear me?” Joe’s face came into view. It was just as bad as I thought it was from the horrified look on his face. I did my best to focus on it even if it confirmed to me that I was dying. I wanted to be able to respond to the man but it was incredibly difficult. My body was fading from my control and I was fully aware of what was happening.

“Sorry.” I managed to get out. A pained cry left me as he pressed down on my wound. I could hear him apologizing and reminding me that it was necessary. He was going to try to stop the bleeding but it likely wasn't going to do anything. The medics wouldn’t get here soon enough. He refused to accept it even though I already had. This was it for me.

“No. No you don’t get to go like this. I need you around Andy. Sweetheart…” The word was odd coming from his mouth and broke through the muffled noises. He hadn’t said that to me before. “I’m not ready to let you go.” It was the last thing I heard.

**********************

Staring at the building, I was nervous. This was a huge change for me. Out of the mountains and into the city, out of the mess with family and friends into a government agency. These were massive changes, turning my life onto it’s head. I had wished my mom and dad goodbye of course, when I had left for the academy and let a few of my coworkers know. They had to know since I would be leaving. But I hadn’t told anyone else. I had just upped and left without a word to anyone else. It had been easier that way. No one would try to stop me, talk me out of the decision, guilt me out of it because they felt betrayed. It had been a hard thing to do. Especially leaving Phillip behind. Phillip, my best friend since elementary school. We had done practically everything together. We had been attached at the hip, even when his father had come into the picture. He had more or less lived at my house for close to two years when we were in middle school. 

Up until high school. That was when things began to change. I developed what I had hoped was a passing crush initially. He was my best friend. That was typical right? Most girls who had close guy friends ended up developing crushes. They went away though. He never looked at me lie that though. Never once. His eyes had been solely focused on one or two girls. Then came the mess of what he had become involved with. Things began to really change then. I never said a word but I didn’t agree with what he was doing, the mess that his father had involved him in. Even so, I kept my mouth shut and only voiced my concerns for his safety. 

We steadily grew apart despite my best efforts. I didn’t want to be involved in what he was involved with, which just made it harder to spend time with him. Not only that, but he was high more times than he wasn’t. Those were the times that it wasn’t enjoyable to be around him. It didn’t seem to bother him that I was pulling away though. Not as much as it did me. He occasionally made an effort but they become few and far between. He never let me date though. I tried once or twice just to see if I could get over the crush that I was stuck with. It never worked out. Phillip chased away the two boys that I had tried to see. 

After high school, it all spiralled out of control. He went  off while I stuck around. I couldn’t keep him out of trouble and our friendship didn’t seem to mean all that much to him anymore. That never dulled the feelings I had for him unfortunately. While he was doing his thing, I ended up with a job at the police station. It started off as secretary work before they put me through the academy for a year. I had wanted to make a difference, help instead of harm my community, help others that couldn’t help themselves. What I didn’t expect was the job to be a perfect stepping stone to get into the Bureau academy.

Phillip had just returned from Florida and his stint in prison. From my understanding, it had been a mess, related to things that I hadn’t thought that he was involved with. Nothing could be done about that from my end though. It wasn’t my business and despite the flame that I held for him, it was no longer my problem. I did my best to avoid running into him. It would have been awkward and uncomfortable. If he knew what was I going to do, he wouldn’t be happy. That disappointment and hurt would have bothered me, a fact that was ridiculous in and of itself. 

I had gotten through the academy with relative ease. My mind had been set and I had implemented a hard workout regime prior to my acceptance. My coworkers were more than happy to help out, keeping me on track. They were just as excited as I was to see me go.   

Now I was standing here, in front of the building in New York, trying to work up the courage that I needed to head in and meet my new partner. Supposedly he was a veteran, someone who had accolades for the various successes he had already accomplished on the job. That was a comforting thought as much as it made me nervous. 

“Building’s not going to move anywhere.” I, embarrassingly enough, flinched agt the sound of the voice that came from behind me. I turned around and of course it had to be my partner, Joe Merriweather. He was tall and lean, with a salt and pepper beard that suited the angles of his face. The suit hung off his frame a bit but it just accented how lean he was. I gave him a sheepish smile.

“No, I would hope that it wouldn’t.” I held out my hand. “Andrea Dawkins, Andy. You must be my partner.” He shook my hand, an amused smile on his face. He clearly knew who I was. There probably weren’t too many people that stood in front of the building and gawked. 

“Heard I was getting a rookie today. Nice to meet you Andy. Joe Merriweather.” I nodded. “ No need to be nervous. Com on, I’ll show you around.” He led me inside, not mentioning the embarrassing situation. 

I had been worried that I had made such a fool of myself that first day with Joe. Apparently, he hadn’t held it against me. He gave me plenty of opportunities to prove myself in the field and in the office. He was always encouraging without coddling me too much. He was a firm guiding hand that knew when to push and when to step in. He allowed me to work through things on my own where it was allowed and guided me through the others that needed a much more timely response. It was a workflow that had me less nervous and feeling like I was constantly improving. There was a routine there that was easy to fall into. It also created a comrodderie in between Joe and I. Sure partners got close and got together outside of work. That wasn’t unusual. We spent more time together than they did with their families. 

We did a little more together though. Joe was divorced with a kid that his ex had custody. From what I learned, they were on good terms, it just hadn’t worked out between them with his job. I didn’t have anyone in the city that I was close with and I didn’t particularly like to head home to visit my partners. Couple those two things and we ended up spending a decent amount of time together. We got along well and our friendship outside of work didn’t affect work.

Trips to the diner, movie nights, car rides upstate, we kind of did it all. It wasn’t just a fill in the time sort of deal. We had genuine fun. Some of our coworkers joke that we were a couple. I had never gotten that vibe from Joe. he had never said anything or had given any indication that he saw me as anything other than a friend. I wasn’t looking for a relationship either. I wasn’t over Phillip, even if we had never been together and I knew we wouldn’t be. It was that first love sort of deal, tough to let go of those feelings that had been around for so damn long.

Joe never asked why I didn’t go home often or about my love life. We had peppered each other with personal questions once we were comfortable with one another of course. We were partners, we had to know one another. Partners worked better that way. I didn’t want to keep secrets and I had no qualms in explaining Phillip but Joe seemed to sense that it wasn’t a subject that I was all that eager to talk about. He never pushed and never tried to delve deeper into the history there. I was thankful for that. It could have made things awkward. 

We were sharing some pizza, waiting on an observation of two idiots who were a part of an illegal arms trading ring. There was likely some drug stuff going on as well but we didn’t have the exact details. All in all, it was something that we both felt confident about handling. Low level thugs that could and likely would lead to bigger fish was the hope. Every investigation started somewhere. It was always the hope that the small things lead to bigger busts. The top guys could and wouldn’t be caught without guys like the ones we were watching going down first. 

I took a bite of my pizza and almost choked on it when I saw Phillip walk out of the building. God damn it.  Unconsciously, I slid lower into my seat. That was the last thing that I needed. He didn’t need to be recognizing me and blowing our cover. Not that he knew what I was doing for a living these days. I hoped. 

Joe immediately knew something was wrong. I could feel his eyes on me, studying carefully. 

“Which one is it?” There was no room for nonsense in his voice. He wanted answers and he wanted them right now. I swallowed hard and was silent for just a moment longer. 

“Red hanley. It’s Phillip Kopus.” The words felt acidic on my tongue. I hated having to admit it, having to expose Joe to that. It was actually worse than the idea of having to arrest Phillip. Which by itself wasn’t present. But I didn’t want Joe disappointed in me. My stomach churned and I set down the piece of pizza I was working on. I didn’t want to be any part of this but it wasn’t like anything could be done about that feeling. We were here. He was seen. It was our job to arrest those individuals. My hands were tied. 

“That’s Phillip?” Joe sounded a little surprised. I couldn't bring myself to look in his direction. I was too afraid to see the disappointment that I knew would be on his face. I closed my eyes and nodded.

“Yeah. That’s Phillip.” I had never wanted the ground to open up and swallow me whole more than I did in that moment. Hell, even Phillip ditching me to go with another girl to a school event wasn’t as bad as this. It was just beyond embarrassing. I had wanted so desperately to keep those two parts of my life apart. Especially since those two parts would clash horrifically. There wasn’t a need for them to ever end up meeting. Sure I hadn’t been involved with anything that he was. I had a clean record. That didn’t mean that people didn’t associated me with Phillip back at home. 

It shouldn’t have come as a surprise though that they did end up meeting up. I knew that Phillip didn’t exactly do things that were legal. He had a laundry list of charges already. I tried to keep tabs every so often even if we had no interactions. It was a peace of mind thing for me. My parents occasionally gave updates too. Judging how Joe reacted, he hadn’t done much digging. I didn’t know whether to be thankful or nervous about that fact. It could really end up going either way. 

I thought that Phillip was done with his father. Apparently, I was wrong. This was not going to be enjoyable in the least. Maybe, if he saw me, it would lessen the chances of shit going wrong. I would have to try and keep things as calm as possible. Something that wasn’t often the case when it came to busts like these. None of these guys liked to go down without a fight. I could have gotten sick at just the thought.

“You know…” I didn’t even want to hear what Joe was going to say and cut him right off. 

“It doesn’t change anything. We have a job to do. These guys have to be stopped.” I kept my voice firm as I spoke. I didn’t think that I would really be able to do it but I had no choice. I didn’t want him thinking that I was absolutely incapable either. A weak spot for the man wouldn’t look good.

“Right.” He didn’t sound convinced. That was the first time that I had ever heard him sound like that when it came to me. It made me more nervous but also more determined. No matter what my feelings were, no matter what I thought of Phillip, and no matter how much I wanted to protect him, I had a job to do. That overrode everything. This had to come first. It was one of the few times in my life that it was the case. I  wasn’t going to lose my job over this. He wasn’t worth it. I repeated that mantra in my head  a few times. Nor was it worth losing Joe. 

We had back up called. We had seen three guys but it was unclear if there were any more. They were still a few minutes out when Joe made the call that we were heading in before they arrived. It didn’t feel right. Maybe that was just because I knew Phillip was in there. I pushed away the concern and the heavy feeling. Joe was sure about it so I had to be too. He moved the car down the street a little bit and we quickly geared up. Our vests went on and guns were loaded. We checked each other before he gave me a nod. There was no point in delaying it anymore. Our back up was probably another ten minutes out. I wished they were closer as we made our way to the door.

I squared up and refocused myself. It was important that I wasn’t distracted. Our lives were on the line. It wasn’t only Phillip in there. There were other guys that would gladly see us dead. One wrong move and one of us could end up shot. That wasn’t anything that I wanted to see. Joe made sure I was set before he opened the door. 

It was quiet as we walked in. Two corners checked and there was no one around. My nerves were running high as we moved through the hallway. Shoulder to shoulder and side by side, we cleared room after room. It was a slow but steady pace. Missing anyone could cause a bullet to end up in our backs. We had to be thorough. We knew we were looking for at least three guys but at this point were expecting there to be a couple more. It kept us cautious. Still no one. It was almost like they had left. They couldn’t have though. We would have seen it. Their cars had been parked in our line of view from where we sat watching the building. They all had to be on the large production floor. Which would be a bitch for us. Bad guys, open space, potentially little cover. It all added up to a disadvantage for us. If it turned into a firefight, the odds weren’t in our favor. 

“You ready?” Joe had his hand on the door. It wasn’t like there was another choice. I let out a slow breath, keeping my gun elevated and steady. I nodded. 

“Let’s go.” He pulled open the door and we instantly moved forward. We caught two guys off guard. Neither of them were Phillip. That meant that he was around and could be watching us. It was a dangerous situation. 

“On the ground!” Of course they didn’t respond and jumped for their weapons. Joe fired off two rounds and I quickly followed suit. They both went down. The others would be warned by our shots, knowing about our presence. The element of surprise was out the window. We quickly found ourselves cover for safety. 

“Good?”

“Good.” Our back up was now less than five minutes away. We might be able to wait it out. That was the hope at least. Joe peeked around the corner of our cover.

“Backup should be here soon. Just gotta hold them off. Stay behind cover and make sure we don’t get flanked.” It was a basic plan but likely one that would keep us alive. I nodded and let out another slow breath. This was where the training kicked in. The rest of the world was shut out and focus was on following through on all shots while maintaining cover. 

“Easy enough.” I peeked around my own corner. Nothing. That meant that we had a couple more moments before things got iffy. It sounded like a couple of men were rushing towards us though. It was tough to tell from just the echoes of feet against the ground but there might be more men than we could really hold off on our own until our backup arrived. Another peek around the corner told me that at least three guys were coming around to my side. Great. That was fantastic.

“Got three over here.”

“Two on my side.” There were only supposed to be two or three guys here. This had turned into seven. Five total were currently against us. With backup still a few minutes out, we had to figure out the best way to survive this.

Shots began to fire. Bullets whizzed over our heads. A couple of them landed on the metal that we were using as cover, thudding loudly. I paused for a minute, trying to time my movements. When it sounded like I had a break in the fire, I leaned out of my cover and shot off a few rounds of my own. I didn’t hear any screams or shouts as I tucked back in. The likelihood of me hitting anything was slim then. I cursed under my breath softly. Joe seemed to have some amount of luck. I reloaded and shifted in my feet just a bit. 

Again, the motion had to be time. THis time the result was one of the guys going down. Joe had taken his two down.

The backup arrived. They were coming in from the other side of the building, behind the criminals. I could hear the door bust in and took that moment to stand up. I checked around the corner of our cover. The move was a mistake.

The pain radiated out from my abdomen. My gun dropped and my hands moved to my stomach. I could see Phillip’s shocked face and the gun dropping from his hands. 

[bibillyrusso-blog]

Unexpected - Billy Russo

request from @castletrash: “can I request a killy one shot where he’s struggling to give up his playboy lifestyle and commit to the reader, and maybe is tempted to cheat (throw in some angst yeasssss), but happy fluffy ending ofc”

I hope you enjoy!!

******

People say that when you find the one, you just know. Your heart flutters in your chest, you get a warm feeling inside, you get butterflies in your stomach. Your body knew just as soon as your heart did and the rest of you followed.

But the thing people forgot to mention to Billy was that even when he knew, not everything else caught up so quick. His habits and routines didn’t just immediately change.

He remembers it clear as day; it was a Friday night at a bar he frequented, just as loud and crowded as usual. On any given Friday night at said bar, Billy could’ve (and would’ve) picked the most beautiful girl out of the whole place, convinced her to take him home, and be gone before she could even get redressed. It was his weekly routine and he never went home with the same girl twice. It just wasn’t him. He knew he was good looking and had money and was charming and he knew better than to waste it being tied down to one woman he would eventually get sick of and hurt. He didn’t have the time or emotional capacity to deal with the sticky feelings and the mess that would eventually be made. But sometimes the universe likes to throw a wrench into things.

Y/N was sitting at the very end of the bar, swirling around the whiskey in the bottom of her glass, finally coming to terms with the fact that she had been stood up. She was supposed to meet some guy her sister was attempting to set her up with and he was 2 hours late and not one call or text was received. She threw back the rest of her drink, letting the burn in her throat distract from her hurting.

At 25, it was hard for Y/N to hold out hope for a husband. She just kept telling herself that if it was going to happen for her, it would’ve happened by now. She knew she sounded ridiculous and that just because all of her high school friends got married at 22, doesn’t mean she won’t find the right guy for her. She had decided that marriage wasn’t for her. She didn’t want to waste her time looking for a mediocre man to settle for when she had her dream job that she could put her heart and soul into. And if she got lonely, she could always adopt a dog. A man wasn’t her endgame and it wasn’t her goal in life but she did think it would be nice to have someone to spend her life with. That voice in the back of her head, convincing her she wanted a boyfriend, was cut off out of nowhere.

“Waiting for someone?”

She glanced up, prepared to snap on this stranger for pestering her, but when she saw his face, her glare softened. She was met with the deepest brown eyes she had ever seen and probably the best looking man she had ever seen. She could feel her heart rate pick up and her palms start to sweat.

“Not anymore. My friend seems to be a no-show so I guess I’m going home,” she explained, keeping her composure and collecting her things to leave.

He put his hand out to stop her and then realized how creepy he looked. What the fuck are you doing Billy? he thought to himself. But he had this feeling in his gut that if he let her walk away, he’d regret it. His hands got clammy and his stomach fluttered when she looked in his eyes. He knew this was trouble.

After convincing her to not let the night go to waste, Billy ended up back at her apartment, as anticipated. But what he didn’t anticipate was the conversation on the ride back to her place. Talking about work and the city and their lives, he caught himself actually caring about what she had to say. And when they were done, he didn’t get dressed and leave. They sat in her bed and talked and laughed for hours. She eventually fell asleep next to him and he caught himself looking at her sleeping face, lips parted and eyelashes gently laying on her cheeks.

And it was all history after that. Phone numbers were exchanged, there were dinner dates and movie nights and sleepovers at his apartment. He realized he had never done this before and he was loving every second of it. But there was a voice in the back of his head telling him that it wasn’t enough.

***

“Are you fucking joking, Billy?” she shouted across the room, “It’s not that fucking difficult to show up for a dinner you swore you’d come to with me. I will truly never understand you.”

“I don’t know what you want me to say, Y/N,” he sighed.

“I want you to say you’re sorry and that it won’t happen again.”

“You know I can’t promise that.”

He could’ve swore he heard her heart break in that moment. Obviously his intention wasn’t to hurt her but it just kinda happened. He didn’t know the first thing about how to be a boyfriend. Billy got tired of playing house. He was tired of the dinners with your coworkers and he was tired of not being able to go out every weekend. He was tired of being Y/N’s boyfriend. It hurt him to think that way but he knew it was true. He cared about her like he had never cared for anything else in this world and he was pretty sure it was love. But love didn’t change the fact that he missed the days of hooking up with different girls every night and doing whatever he wanted whenever he wanted. He wished loving her was enough. That those feelings alone kept her happy and made the relationship work. But they didn’t and he couldn’t stand the tasks that came with being someone’s boyfriend.

“Just go. I want to be alone,” she whispered out. He could tell she was holding back tears. She never wanted to look weak because she thought he was so strong.

Billy didn’t say a word and left her apartment with his head hung low.

***

Billy managed to find himself at the one place that he knew would ease his mind. The bar. The same bar he would meet all of his one night stands at. The same bar he met Y/N at. It was like a war was going on in his head. There was the part of him who loved Y/N unconditionally. The part that would suffer through work dinners and bad movies for. The part that saw a future with her. And then there was the old Billy. The part of him that couldn’t be tied down. The part of him that couldn’t take his eyes off of the skinny brunette three stools down from him.

The longer he sat there, the harder the internal battle got. Before he could even attempt to clear his head, he found himself next to said brunette, hand on her thigh. It felt natural to him. It was like playing ball for the first time after being on the bench all season. And this girl was loving it too. She melted into his touch and held onto his every word.

But every time she spoke, something felt wrong. She didn’t have a smartass reply to everything he said, like you did. She didn’t crinkle up her nose when she laughed, like you did. And he noticed it more and more with each passing second. Then he caught a good glimpse at her face. She didn’t have your eyes. In that moment, Billy knew that he was a fool for ever thinking that you weren’t the only person out there for him.

When the rest of his body caught up with his mind, he pulled his hand away from this girl like he was pulling it off a hot stove. It burned when he thought about touching someone that wasn’t you. He felt dizzy and was up and out of the bar before he could fuck this up any more than he already had.

He sprinted back to your apartment as fast as he possibly could because he couldn’t be without you for another second.

When he reached the door, he stopped for a second, thinking to himself what had happened. His biggest fear in life was being tied down and it had come true. And he didn’t want it any other way.

After pounding on the door, you finally cracked the door ever so slightly.

“What do you want, William?” you croaked out, voice hoarse from crying.

“Let me in. I need to talk to you,” he pleaded.

“I don’t know Billy I just don’t think I’m up for it right now,” you hesitated. You couldn’t afford to get hurt again. You let him in emotionally and then realized that he wasn’t on the same page as you. You saw a future with him and he saw you as temporary.

But you could see the desperation in his eyes so you opened the door and he followed you to the living room. You sat down on the couch and he sat next to you, you still trying to keep your distance.

“I’m gonna talk and I just need you to listen or else I’ll never get it out. You can punch me and slap me and kick me out if you want but please wait until I’m done,” he pleaded. You didn’t want to know what he had to say because it would only make things harder and you knew it. But you nodded, allowing him the chance to explain.

“I don’t know how to be a boyfriend. I’ve never been anyone’s boyfriend. I don’t know how to be anything more than a casual fuck. I had my way of doing things and my way of living my life and you came and you fucked that up for me. You were just sitting there and you were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen in my life and from that first look I knew it couldn’t just be a one time thing. And I was right. I loved every second with you but overnight it was like I was supposed to be someone else. I was supposed to go from a hook up to boyfriend material and that scared the shit out of me. I just kept telling myself that I wasn’t cut out for this. That I couldn’t be what you wanted me to be. And then I fucking fell in love with you and it freaked me out so I pushed you away and I fucking ran for the hills. I ran and I thought that picking up girls would make me feel better but I just felt worse. I couldn’t even think of kissing another woman without being sick because she’s not you. No one compares to you and it’s so fucked up because I wasn’t ready for that. I wasn’t ready to meet the person I’m supposed to be with for the rest of my life. But here you are and I have to stop making excuses and I need to man up and be good to you. Because dammit, Y/N, I love you. You’re it for me.”

You could feel the warm stream of tears running down your cheeks as he finished his confession.

“I love you too Billy. I’m not going anywhere and you’re it for me too so no more messing around with other people,” you tried to say sternly.

“There’s no one else for me but you baby,” he said with a smile on his face and tears in his eyes. He planted both hands on your cheeks, pulling you into a passionate kiss.

[cryptid-crusader]

My Tumblr History (feat. a LOT of rambling, I apologize)

I’ve been on Tumblr 9 years. I came to Tumblr from Xanga (which IDK if that’s even still a thing or not) after being thoroughly obsessed with latter for about 4 or so years. Xanga was much more of a typical blog blog, and though I interacted with far less people on it, those few I did became honest to god friends that I still think about to this day. Though, as years past, my few friends began to drop off one by one from the site and I found myself enjoying it much less once they were gone. Eventually, I left too.

A few months later, I decided to join Tumblr. It was still a fairly new site in 2010 when I had joined, and I had only heard a few things here and there around the internet before I decided to check it out myself. When I first started, I used this site a lot like I used Xanga and basically had it exclusively as an internet journal to talk about life and nerdy shit and the like (I remember even thinking the reblog option was dumb because why not just make your own content? Why reblog other peoples stuff? loooool) and also did a lot of those writing daily challenges. Do you guys remember those? I loved them. Anyway...

Needless to say as time went on and I got older and followed more people and gained more followers (some of you have been here from very early on and for that I am incredibly thankful) as dweeby as this may sound, I really grew as a person. God, I remember 9 years ago I would sometimes post uncredited art or really insensitive, not funny at all, “jokes” because I honestly didn’t see a problem with them (and the only reason I really remember these awful things is occasionally once in a blue moon random people would find them in the bowels of my blog and like them and I would shudder and delete them). I kinda started Tumblr as this young social media doofus that, again as cheesy as it sounds, learned a lot and grew from my experience here. I would never dream of posting uncredited art now, and those “jokes” make me want to vomit. I learned a lot about social issues through this blog and it also helped me open up and learn about my sexuality. I got to see a broader world view from all different walks of life here (which was incredibly refreshing after growing up in a very close knit predominately white republican community) , and met some fantastic humans I’m blessed to have interacted with and become their friend. I never would have met them without this site!

Not to mention just like... all the cool shit. There are SO many talented people on Tumblr. So much beautiful art, fantastic writing, and just all round hilarious and interesting humans that I loved to get even a small peak into their lives and learn about them and what they like and do for fun. I’ve picked up hobbies through this site, joined fandoms through this site, made friends, laughed endlessly, become inspired, found some of my favorite anime/books/movies, and have had so much fun in these nine years on Tumblr.

... Not to say that it hasn’t been without it’s bad. I’ve been here long enough to remember when Tumblr users proudly boasted about how open and inviting to any and all people they were, how they would never point fingers, be mean, or turn others away. Boy, how that has changed looool. I’ve been through the annoying but innocent enough superwholocks and the scandals of older users who used to be Tumblr royalty that fucked up in some way and fell from grace, to the disgrace of people who are totally fine humans that didn’t completely cater to exactly what certain people wanted or made a few wrong steps that people felt like they had to attack them viciously for the littlest asinine shit. The good the bad and the ugly, all the way through to now.

Now. :(

To be frank, this entire site has been a disaster for a loooooooooong time with a staff that seems to be equal mix of not knowing at all how to run a functioning site and not giving a shit at all about it’s user base and their feelings (which reeeeeeeally sucks for all the fantastic content creators and people who have been here forever who have essentially made this site what it is). Little things like ‘oh we made an update that ‘everyone’ will love but is actually dumb as hell and just pisses people off’ to their have been porn bots, pedos, and nazis on this site for YEARS terrorizing people and being awful but guess that is just how it will be... Until they got banned from the app store and THEN it’s an issue (because they lost money ofc)!

Suddenly, Tumblr staff cares, but only for themselves. Instead of actually resolving the issue THAT HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR YEARS AND IS AN EXTREMELY WELL KNOW AND COMPLAINED ABOUT ISSUE they just decide fuck it, punish everyone. No “porn” at all, but I use that term lightly because they say some nudity is allowed (don’t get me started on female presenting nipples it also makes me laugh to hard and then I won’t be able to type) and for some reason apparently written erotica is allowed (which makes absolutely zero sense if you are truly trying to make this a ‘family friendly’ site, why is visual porn not allowed but written OK?) but... Is it really? Posts that are completely innocent are getting tagged left and right as not suitable content. Like, thousands of posts are getting tagged by whatever stupid algorithm they are using that are completely void of anything remotely sexual and you expect me to believe your incompetent asses are going to go through them and deem which are OK and which aren’t based on you shoddy stupid ass new rules? Fuck that. 

And all the sex workers and people and run side blogs and NSFW art blogs and the like are just completely screwed (no pun intended). It upsets me because like... Porn blogs have never been the issue. There are definitely some horrible ones, no denying that, but for the most part they just stayed in their lane and interacted with other porn blogs. They weren’t the issue (And, if Tumblr knew at all how to create a damn site, they wouldn’t have been an issue at all if the damn safe mode toggle actually worked like it was supposed to). The ungodly amount of bots is the fucking issue. I can tell you right now, I have over a thousand followers and I am in no way kidding when I say half of those are porn bots that I just gave up reporting because I get like, 3 of them following me a week on average. It’s ridiculous! Also, ACTUAL FUCKING CHILD PORN? THAT IS EASILY ACCESSIBLE EVEN WHEN NOT LOOKING UP ANYTHING NSFW (which I very unfortunately know through experience)? And to top it all off, fucking NAZIS who for some reason are still allowed to spew their bullshit on this site??? Is this a nightmare?

So with all this happening, I believe it’s pretty safe to say Tumblr’s days are numbered. It makes me laugh and cry, it’s something you could see coming a mile away and yet something that you didn’t think would actually happen. I don’t want to leave Tumblr. I love you guys (the users not the staff). You have all brought joy and enrichment to my life and I am so grateful I got to be here with you. I also just like a lot of nuances of tumblr, like the fact I can read an entry so powerful and moving it brings me to tears and then just one post underneath is an over baked nonsensical cat meme which has me wheezing for reasons I can’t quite explain. I can be anonymous and as weird as I want to here without having to really worry about family, coworkers, or older friends seeing it and being like WTF is wrong with you, what does all this mean??? I like how my blog looks and how I can bitch in the tags and chat with my friends and message people and talk about my oc’s and randoms interests and get pointers and learn new things and AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I love Tumblr. I don’t want to leave and don’t necessarily plan to. But then again, I said they same thing about Xanga, and if Tumblr keeps going in the way it is going... I’m not sure I really truly  want to be lumped in with that. :/

Now this has already been entirely too long (and honestly I’m kind of feeling how I did when I started this blog in 2010 lul) but lemme say this: Thanks guys, I had a whole lot of fun. And if I do end up leaving sometime in the maybe not to distant future know that I will always be lurking around somewhere on the internet, and I had the best time while I was here. I wish nothing but the best for all of you, and may we all be able to remain a happy and dysfunctional little group, if not here, somewhere much better.