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bucky-at-bedtime · 3 years

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Stucky Fic Recs

So basically I went through all of my ao3 bookmarks and collated a list of some of my favourites (I couldn't fit all of them on this list, so if anyone shows interest there might be a part two).

Please read tags and descriptions of the works before reading, some of them are pretty dark or extremely horny so just make sure you check that the fic is for you!!

Please please please send me your favourite fics in return! I am always happy to hear fic recs, headcanons and any other ideas/comments you all have!

Without any further ado, here are a few of my favourite Stucky fics:

‘Not Easily Conquered’ series by dropdeaddream, WhatAreFear

Rating: M, Words: 117,692

https://archiveofourown.org/series/115516

“I told you, you heard me: I told you never to follow me into Hell. Now I’m not vain enough to think that’s why you’re out here now — if there’s any person in what’s left of this God forsaken planet who’s part of a bigger picture, it’d be you. But I’ll keep saying it until it sticks. You got nothing to prove. I’m not worth much, I damn well know that, but I’ll ask you anyway: Stay for me. If you leave me alone in this world I’ll turn into something terrible. I’ll turn into the nasty creature that’s growing inside me. This war, it’ll swallow me whole”

[To me, this fic is like the classic Stucky 101 fanfic – if you're a Stucky fan and you haven't read this, I highly recommend it. The authors explore the Steve/Bucky relationship in such an interesting, tragic, emotive way and I cry every time I read it. I couldn't praise this work enough.]

‘Ain’t No Grave’ series by spitandvinegar

Rating: M-E, Words: 131,789

https://archiveofourown.org/series/426577

"Yeah, he never calls me by my name," Steve says. "It's always champ, ace, hotshot, that kinda thing."

"Man, that is flirting," Sam says. "That nicknames thing, he is flirting with you. He's just working his way up to calling you baby or something."

Steve goes redder than a damn coke can. Sam pumps his fist. "Yes, I am so right, I am wise as hell. He did, didn't he?"

"He called me sweetheart," Steve says grimly, "because he's a drug addict with brain damage."

"Or because he looooooves you," Sam says. Captain America throws a cookie at his head. Sam eats it, because he deserves a treat for being so damn wise.”

[I'm currently re-reading this fic and absolutely loving it. The way spitandvinegar writes Bucky's road towards recovery and Steve's entire characterisation – it's all just so good. It's another one that covers some pretty dark themes, so make sure you're checkin those tags!]

'Einherjar' by thecommodore_squid

Rating: M, Words: 71297

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7157024/chapters/16249814

But Steve was fine.

Sure, he hadn’t seen Bucky in months, and sometimes he was at the punching bag so long that his skin started to peel off to expose the bones of his fingers, and sometimes he couldn’t find the energy to drag himself out of bed, and sometimes he went weeks without sleeping, and sometimes he thought about throwing himself head-first off the nearest tall structure, but he was fine.

He was absolutely, perfectly, one-hundred percent, fucking fine.

AKA In which Steve learns how to deal with his shit, and Bucky learns how to stop leaving.

[basically the definition of a recovery fic, I absolutely adore it. This is tragic and amazing and makes me cry and smile. It’s got a bunch of fantastic cameos and It really just ticks so many of my boxes.]

‘Like real People do’ by 2bestfriends

Rating: E, Words: 67,775

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19887376/chapters/47103217

“"Ask me what?" demands Bucky. "I didn't hear a question."

Steve licks his lips. "Will you stay with me? Will you come back home, Buck?"

"Home," repeats Bucky in a small voice, and then he's crying for real.”

[Basically soft lumberjack!steve and lonely twink!bucky being horny and in love. This is a comfort fic for that’s really just about my favourite boys falling in love.]

‘This City Bleeds it’s Aching Heart’ by anonymous

Rating: E, Words: 34,537

https://archiveofourown.org/works/835829/chapters/1591736

“The one where Steve and Bucky pose as a happily married couple while on a mission for SHIELD, to catch an international arms dealer hiding in a suburban neighbourhood.”

[The plot in this one is just a good time and i think it’s just a really fun take on the fake relationship trope. Also some really great characterisation.]

‘Home is Wherever I’m With You’ by cydonic

Rating: E, Words: 88,570

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18868081/chapters/44783077

“Bucky kisses Steve and Emma goodbye before they leave for school, which is why – partway down the road – Amelia turns to him and asks, “why are you and Daddy kissing?”

Which is definitely a conversation Bucky’s been expecting since Steve just did it, but it still takes him by surprise. Again, he thinks he should wait for Steve, but Amelia’s not the sort of kid to let anything rest. Plus, Bucky’s taking her to school where she will undoubtedly share the story with anyone who’ll listen.

He also stops to think that Steve’s asked him to stay, which means Bucky must be trusted with their happiness and well-being, at least in some small capacity.

Bucky clears his throat and searches for some explanation that will help Amelia make sense of this sudden turn of events. “Because we love each other,” is all he comes up with.”

[Bear with me, this is a House Flipper!Bucky Au. And dad!Steve. I just love a found family trope I’m not gonna lie to you. Another comfort fic that warms my lil heart.]

‘Lucky Seven’ by BetteNoire (WeAreWolves)

Rating: E, Words: 94,364

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7033105/chapters/16002481

“Back from where--?” James says, the sentence ending in a distinctly undignified squawk as Steve sweeps him up in his arms, bridal-style, and starts carrying him upstairs.

James tenses momentarily then relaxes into Steve's arms and throws back his head and starts laughing. The laughter peals out of him, his body shaking, his amusement occasionally broken by little gasps of pain.

“What's so funny?” Steve frowns.

“You are,” James says, still giggling. “You're ridiculous, Steve Rogers.”

“Behave. Or I will drop you,” Steve growls.

[The shrunkyclunks modern AU of my dreams featuring Mechanic!Bucky and cap!Steve and some really beautiful writing.]

'Dishonor On Your Cow' by mandarou

Rating: E, Words: 111695

https://archiveofourown.org/works/10659162/chapters/23589582

“Sergeant Barnes?”

“Oh, hell no, don’t call him that, man,” Sam warned.

“Captain Fuck Off!” Barnes shouted over him. “Fight me!”

Steve didn’t know whether to laugh or just slink away. He managed to combine the two by pacing two steps and snorting instead. Like a bull.

“I’m gonna need you to calm your ass, Barnes,” Sam said as he went limp again, obstructing Barnes’s struggling under him. “This is so undignified. That is Captain goddamn America.”

“Captain goddamn America!” Barnes repeated, louder. And angrier.

Steve cleared his throat again. “I’ve been looking for you,” he told Barnes.

“I hope you brought lube this time!” Barnes shouted.

[I’m not gonna lie it took me a minute to get into this one but by the end I was crying with them, laughing with them, and just really in my feels. Some very insane things happen so here’s a few of my favourite tags: ‘Seargent Barnes is done with your Shit Steve’, ‘blatant disrespect of a man’s motorcycle’, ‘Steve you ding dong’ and ‘PR nightmares in the form of Supersoldiers’.]

Propietary Information by Notlucy

Rating: E, Words: 85141

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11964402/chapters/27054777

“Okay, so Bucky Barnes has a crush on Steve Rogers. The guy's gorgeous, talented and, oh yeah, the Chief Design Officer of the biggest tech company in the world. In other words: he's so far out of Bucky's league that he might as well be in a different stratosphere.”

[We were never gonna get through this list without a Sugar Daddy!AU (I have a weakness). This one is… saucy and sexy and sweet and uh pretty kinky so read the tags and all. I’ve read it a few times, and I love the way the author has written Steve in this one, he just makes my heart go '!!!']

‘Roots Have Grown’ by AustinB

Rating: M, Words: 17280

https://archiveofourown.org/works/6912451/chapters/15767941

“Bucky is a mildly agoraphobic veteran with funds to spare, who becomes enamored with the cute blonde guy in his building.

So when Steve mentions needing a roommate to cut down on rent costs, Bucky decides it would be a good idea to volunteer.”

[Another weakness of mine is Roommate AUs, and this one is phenomenal. I tend to go for post serum!Steve stories more often, but this is a pre-serum Steve that I just adore.]

‘The Cold Never Bothered me Anyway’ by icoulddothisallday

Rating: E, Words:75562

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11728869/chapters/26425530

“Bucky Barnes has spent his whole life in a state of mild hypothermia. Steve Rogers has spent the last 70 years in the ice. The two things aren’t related until, suddenly, they are. Shrunkyclunks soulmate AU (AKA the awkward bb au).”

[I think this is the only soulmate AU in my bookmarks? I would totally be down to read more though! This one is really fun and really enjoy Bucky’s characterisation here!]

'War, Children' by Nonymos

Rating: E, Words: 106615

https://archiveofourown.org/works/5373050/chapters/12409394

“After Bucky was released from the hospital, it only took him a couple of weeks to give up on himself. Difficult to believe in any kind of future when the simple act of staying alive was almost too big an effort.

Out the frosted window, across the street, there was a tiny homeless guy burrowing under an awning.”

[An interesting exploration of Bucky’s PTSD with a trans!Steve which was a cool take on his character too!]

'The Company You Keep' by orbingarrow

Rating: G, Words: 51191

https://archiveofourown.org/works/3468605/chapters/7613072

“Hurt, hungry, and on the run, the Winter Soldier doesn’t have a lot of safe options to go to for help. Figuring that any friend of Captain Steve Rogers is unlikely to be HYDRA, Bucky takes a chance and reaches out to the first Avenger he can find.

It works out better than anyone could have expected. Eventually.”

[hurt/comfort, recovering Bucky, protective Steve, found family and domestic avengers, need I say more? I absolutely loved this one]

#stucky #stucky fics #stucky fic recs #fic rec

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metalbvcky · 4 years

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*Shows up late to the Stucky/Marvel fandom Post-EG with Starbucks and dozens of fics that I’ve read in hand* So you guys like fanfiction?

Yeah so, because of quarantine I’ve been consuming a ton of fic. I’ve probably read over 1.5 million words in just a couple months. So why not share what I’ve been reading! Note that some of these are older (popular) fics so veteran Stucky peeps will probably know of them since I not too recently delved into the realm that is Stucky fanfic. :)

Down below are over a dozen fics with different tropes, Canon/AU’s, and what not. Please do heed the tags on some of these. For the curious: My AO3 bookmarks.

Also shoutout to @stuckylibrary, the mods over there are doing the lords work.

Key: ♥ = My fave, S = Smut, DS = Dom/Sub

Heroes are Easy, People are Hard ♥ by Halbereth, Lorien - Words: 152,284 | CW Fix It, Slight Canon Divergence, Recovery, Slow Burn

Shuri and Wanda cleared Bucky's triggers shortly after Killmonger's attempted coup, and he and Steve went on the run. But it turns out there's more to "fixing Bucky's head" than "getting Hydra out of it." When a group of rogue scientists manage to neutralize the serum and make Steve very sick--pre-serum "this is bad" kind of sick--and they're cut off from contact with Wakanda, Bucky knows only one person with resources to help. He calls Tony and surrenders on the condition that Tony tries to help Steve.

From there, it's basically three variously messed-up guys’ trajectories from "This Is Fine", "Reasonably Speaking I Know It’s Fine", "I Will Be Fine With It" to actually being fine, guest-starring a far-better-adjusted teenage boy who climbs walls, a 1957 Ford Thunderbird, two women with a keen sense of the absurd, and Bruce, the Zen master of “it’s fine that it’s not fine.” Add in the fact that Bucky's been secretly in love with Steve since the thirties and things only get harder. Learning to be a person is the hardest thing Bucky Barnes will ever have to do--but he's got company along the way.

Reap The Whirlwind by Cristinuke - Words: 18,221 | Canon Universe, Post CW, Domestic

Bucky finds a cat. Or rather, a cat finds him.

Your Favorite Ghost by augustbird - Words: 21,013 | Canon Divergence, Post TWS

It's harder than Steve ever expected to bring Bucky home.

Despite the threatening sky and shuddering earth (they remained) ♥ by praximeter (Zimario) - Words: 71,532 | Canon Divergence TWS, Body Modifications

“They really didn’t want the mask to come off.” Hill thumbed through the scans, and pulled out a film that she then handed over to Sam, face mostly expressionless but for the flat line of her pursed lips.

Sam accepted the film and held it up to the light, angling so both he and Steve could see it, squinting at the outline of the Winter Soldier’s skull, and the blips of unnatural white that showed up, God, in his brain, not to mention about half his teeth, plus the mask, with its thin protrusions—

“Those are pins,” Steve realized. He looked over at Hill. “The mask—it’s nailed to his face.”

Hill’s face was as unmoved as ever. “Like I said. They really didn’t want it coming off.”

This city bleeds its aching heart ♥ by Renne - Words: 34,537 | Canon Universe, Fake/Pretend Relationship

The one where Steve and Bucky pose as a happily married couple while on a mission for SHIELD, to catch an international arms dealer hiding in a suburban neighbourhood.

The Best Way to Wake ♥ by LeeHan - Words: 42,293 | Post TFA, Canon Divergence TWS, Recovery

James Buchanan Barnes lay in a glass pod in the middle of the table, frozen since he fell. Steve’s hands were on the glass before he realized he’d moved. “Wait, Captain!” “Get him out,” Steve whispered, his hands searching for a clasp, a keypad, something. “Captain, we need to keep him in stasis—“ “I said get him out!”

Infinite Coffee and Protection Detail ♥ series by owlet - Words: 264,438 | Canon Divergence (sort of)

The mission resets abruptly, from objective: kill to objective: protect

Undersell, overcommit by silentwalrus - Words: 10,222 | Canon Universe

Steve goes so hard for Bucky that he becomes a licensed, practicing massage therapist.

Sparked Up Like a Book of Matches by Sena - Words: 26,734 | Post-TWS, Canon Universe

Steve lives in Stark Tower and doesn't have much to do when he's not going after Hydra strongholds. He attends charity events to make Pepper happy. He goes hiking with Sam. He hangs out with Clint in Bed-Stuy and watches Dog Cops. Sometimes Tony gives him super alcohol in a sippy cup. Sometimes he sees Bucky out of the corner of his eye and wonders if it's real or if he's starting to lose his mind.

Alternately, the one with terrible jokes, a foot chase through the Lower East Side, and a tiny little robot named Shitcan.

Sugar Sweet ♥ from the Red Velvet series by ColorCoated - Words: 173,400 | Modern/Sugar Daddy AU, Age Difference, Slow Burn

"What's your name?" It wasn't even a line. He was just pretty and Bucky wanted a name to go with that face. With that strong jawline. With those deep blue eyes. A little smirk, "Steve."

Awww, Steve. He looked like a Steve. Bucky pursed his lips in a way he hoped was attractive, "You should buy me a drink."

College Student Bucky finds himself immediately attracted to Steve. He knows that Steve's a bit older than him, and that Steve himself is put off by the age difference. . . But that doesn't stop Bucky from wanting to climb him like a tree.

Steve and Bucky Go Away for the Weekend (and cook a lot) ♥ by E_Greer - Words: 30,126 | Canon Universe, Domestic

In which Steve coaxes Bucky out of the Tower for a birthday weekend away and sweet, fluffy domesticity ensues. Phlintasha helps keep Bucky calm, Steve has Opinions about how you set the table, stories are told, greenhouses are toured, baths are had, books are read, tears are shed, stars are gazed upon, and everyone makes Bucky feel loved. Includes Friday night dinner, Saturday morning breakfast, Saturday lunch, Saturday dinner, and Sunday brunch.

Dona Nobis Pacem by thegraytigress - Words: 65,214 | Canon Universe, Recovery

"This job... We try to save as many people as we can. Sometimes it doesn't mean everybody, but if we can't find a way to live with that... Next time maybe nobody gets saved."

An incident on the battlefield exposes how much Steve's falling apart under the crushing weight of leading the Avengers after Sokovia. Now Bucky's adopting a new mission: save Steve before he destroys himself completely, even if it means the end of Captain America.

Give 'Em Hope ♥ by L1av - Words: 130,022 | Modern/Hospital AU, UA/Age Difference

Dr. Steve Rogers likes to think that if his patients have hope- their chances of survival will increase. Bucky Barnes has a 20% chance of survival and a desperate yearning to experience life. Against Steve's better judgment, he develops a relationship with his patient. It's illegal. It's wrong. But it's giving Bucky the hope to keep going, so Steve's going to keep giving it, because he wants Bucky to survive. He needs him to.

You belong (to me) by hermionesmydawg - Words: 29,759 | S, DS, Canon Compliant, Post CW

"Hold on." Bucky lifted a finger and backed out of the doorway, returning a moment later with his cell phone. He snapped a photo of Steve, typed a few words, and then returned to his apple. "What the hell were you doing at a sex club last night?"

"Not having sex, if that's what you're wondering." An alert sounded from Steve's nightstand - a new Snapchat message. He rolled his eyes and unlocked his phone. Sam was always sending stupid Snapchats and frankly, Steve couldn't figure that goddamn app out and cursed whoever created that piece of shit.

The chat wasn't from Sam this time, however. It was a picture of himself, not looking guilty at all, with the caption "when your buddy catches you looking at p*rn."

Circling Back from the It’s Not Linear series by chaya - Words: 59,642 (Series Total: 136,782) | Canon Divergence

Steve looks for Bucky, Bucky finds Steve, Steve tries desperately to put Bucky back together. Bucky tries desperately to let him.

Continuing Education by 743ish, romanticalgirl - Words: 14,443 | S, Canon Universe/College, Shrunkyclunks

Steve is invited to be a guest lecturer on the WWII unit for Bucky's college course. Bucky's more than happy to glean any extra knowledge (in more than just history) from Steve, and Steve's happy to eductate him. But then Bucky has to decide if he can handle the fact that Steve throws himself into danger, and if the sex is worth it. Or if it's not just sex anymore.

Salt & Sugar by GoldBlooded, stfustucky - Words: 19,598 | Modern/Restaurant AU

Steve Rogers is a bigshot celebrity chef in New York City, and Bucky Barnes is a classically trained pastry chef in Moscow.

When billionaire and mutual friend Natasha Romanoff calls on them to collaborate for her Memorial Day Benefit Gala, they both brace themselves to spend the week working with some jerk they're bound to hate. Except... Steve makes a burger that could bring Bucky to tears, and Bucky makes tartlets so beautiful Steve's sure they qualify as art. Maybe, just maybe, together they could make this a night to remember.

@/sgtbarnes1917 and @/cptrogers1918 by BayleyWinchester - Words: 114,203 | Canon Universe, Social Media Fic

Bucky Barnes broke Twitter with one photo

Proprietary Information ♥ from the Additional Information series by notlucy - Words: 85,141 (Series Total: 165,871) | Modern AU, Age difference, Slow Burn

Okay, so Bucky Barnes has a crush on Steve Rogers. The guy's gorgeous, talented and, oh yeah, the Chief Design Officer of the biggest tech company in the world. In other words: he's so far out of Bucky's league that he might as well be in a different stratosphere.

Deep in the Woods (Where My Heart Has Been Waiting) by SilverMyfanwy - Words: 15,353 | Pioneer-AU, Shrinkyclinks

Steve Rogers gets lost in the woods in a snowstorm. Bucky Barnes takes him in. Pioneer-era AU ish with Shrinkyclinks, evil chickens and a cabin in the woods.

A Bucky Odyssey by inediblesushi, thorstbench - Words: 9,952 | Shrinkyclinks, Cap!Bucky, Nurse!Steve

Bucky Barnes, Captain America, has a plan to make Steve Rogers, SHIELD nurse, fall in love with him. Confiding in the Internet might not be the best idea, though. So when the bad pick up lines do not work and Steve looks determined to staying single, he decides to be more himself and less what he thinks he should be.

At first I wanted to wait to post this until I finished a few more fics from my ever growing read-later list but what the heck, now or never! I’ll probably end up making a part 2 reclist by the amount of fic I’m reading these days.

Happy reading and stay safe out there fellow Stucky trash members!!

#stucky #stucky fanfic #stucky fic rec #stucky fanfic rec #stucky fic #stucky fanfiction #stucky au #marvel fanfic #steve x bucky #my reclist #long post for ts #wow this is over a million words worth of fic + that doesnt include everything else ive read omg #the amount of talent in the destiel and stucky fandoms are insanely incredible #a total of 21 fics and at least 5 are apart of a series ... thats a lot of words

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johnny-and-dora · 5 years

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how sweet the taste of certainty

Finally, she doesn’t have to wonder if their love is doomed to be some quiet, fragile thing. It’s not some fickle flickering candle at all, but rather something as bright and as certain and as inevitable as the sunrise. Something beautiful and familiar that, in earnest, is only just beginning.

or, amy tells her parents the shining, golden reason why she can't marry teddy. (a missing scene of my royalty au)

read on ao3 / read the original -

The morning after she asks Jake to marry her, Amy stops a couple steps short of the heavy dining room doors, heart in her mouth, feet suddenly and brutally rooted to the ground. The eloquent and respectful speech she spent all night planning has seemingly evaporated, leaving her less of a person and more a pile of nervous mush.

“Are you ready?” Rosa meets her gaze, her armour glinting in the summer morning sunshine.

“No.” Amy admits, smiling nervously, calculating the nearest escape route and how long she could survive in the forest based on her existing hunting and foraging skills. “Do you think this is a bad idea?”

Rosa considers it for a beat. “No. I think it’s crazy, and it might blow up in your face, but I think it’s a good thing. For everyone.”

She can’t help but feel reassured by her best friend’s trademark bluntness, smoothing down her dress and fixing her hair again almost compulsively. It’s just breakfast. A breakfast that may as well be taking place in the middle of a minefield, but still just breakfast. She can handle breakfast.

Amy takes a deep breath, nods at Rosa, and pushes the doors open.

She’s greeted by the tail-end of an idyllic Santiago family meal; her parents sit at the head of the table, looking stoic and serious as usual. Three of her brothers are also dotted around, Julian in the middle of shoving an entire croissant in his mouth as he waves at her. David is mercifully absent. Silver linings. She definitely doesn’t need the golden child around today.

“Amelia – good, we were starting to worry…” Her mom trails off, a weight behind her words that instantly sends an unpleasant lick of irritation down her spine. She clenches her fists, resisting the urge to tell her just how much she really needs to be worried about. Just how close she was to smuggling herself and Jake over the border last night and never looking back.

Amy knows this won’t work unless she’s calm, firm and collected – she needs this to go perfectly, the stakes for this particular conversation so far past the roof they’re practically up in the stratosphere (Jake’s words, not hers). So, instead of letting out all the latent anger kicking around in her chest, she takes a deep breath and smiles politely, the one usually reserved for dukes that condescendingly call her “sweetheart” and then drop their jaws when she can recite state law from memory.

“You guys said you wanted to see me?”

“Prince Theodore has been asking after you. He’s waiting at the West Wing gate.”

“Good. I need to talk to him.” Amy says, forcefully enough that her mother sharply raises an eyebrow, sucking all the air out of the room in the process. “I need to talk to you, too.”

Her mom and dad share a quick, loaded glance. Everyone falls quiet, Tony and Simon no longer squabbling over who gets the last bread roll, Julian letting a blob of jam fall on his shirt without noticing. All eyes are on her as Victor gestures for her to continue – ideally, she’d do this with as little of an audience as possible, but she confesses to Jake later that she couldn’t help but revel slightly in the drama of it all.

She’s Amy Santiago – she’s fluent in five languages, director of the royal art collection, ambassador for human rights and one of the best trade negotiators in the seven kingdoms. She is capable of anything. She can do this. She’d barely last a week in the forest anyway.

“I’m not going to marry him.”

“Amelia…” Her mother sighs disapprovingly – it drills into Amy’s soul, but she stands her ground, making peace with her portrait being one step further away from the mantel. Her father eyes her warily as if he was expecting this.

“No, I know. I know you think it’s what’s best for me. I know a marriage like that worked for you two, and I know that it would benefit the kingdom and that’s great. But I can’t marry someone I don’t love, and you can’t force me to.”

“Accepting his proposal may seem like a risk, but a one worth taking.” Her father says. “He’s good for you, Amy – his reputation, his influence, it could really help you build something. You two are perfectly matched.”

Amy chews her bottom lip, a nervous tic she just can’t shake, gathering her courage. “Maybe in a different situation, Teddy and I would have worked. I see what you see in him. But it’s more than just on principle. I physically can’t marry him.”

“Why not?”

“Because - “Amy says, voice shaking a little, but eyes alight, “-I’m engaged to someone else.”

And, well, there it is. Her whole life changed by a single sentence.

It has the intended effect, increased tenfold thanks to a truly magnificent spit take from Julian as he chokes on his orange juice. Her parents stare at her in stunned disbelief – a wide-eyed Tony pats Julian on the back as his coughing dissolves into laughter. Best of all though, Amy can see Rosa smiling wide and proud in the corner of her eye, and it’s all she needs to feel newly emboldened, heart thumping in a way that makes her feel powerful instead of helpless.

“My God, Amy. I thought I had it with the whole one-night-stand with the Prince of Arabia thing, but you officially just won most dramatic family announcement. Well played.” Julian laughs, uproarious and bright. She’s glad he’s here.

“I…don’t understand. You are…already engaged?” Her mother asks weakly.

“As of last night, yes.” Amy tries to remain as neutral and matter-of-fact as possible, but she can’t help softening at the fresh memory of Jake saying yes over and over again, punctuating each affirmation with a kiss as she laughed, buoyant and alive with unadulterated joy. It’s all still very surreal, especially considering she hasn’t slept since; but if it is all a dream, it’s one she never intends to wake up from.

“I don’t see a ring,” Julian says, a bright grin plastered on his face that Amy ever so slightly mirrors, unable to completely tamp down her happiness any longer. “Isn’t there supposed to be a ring?”

“There is, but he has it. I proposed to him.”

“Oh, of course you did.” Julian shakes his head in a perfect marriage of awe and amusement.

“How…what…who…” Tony stammers – having graciously passed the point of no return, Amy decides to throw all her caution and concern to the wind and dive headfirst into the unknown.

“His name is Jake Peralta and he is the absolute love of my life. I have never been surer about anything than I am about that fact.” She consciously pours every ounce of conviction she has into her words, and it tastes like honey on her tongue, fresh air in her lungs. “He’s a baker and he helps out in the kitchen with Charles and he is the kindest, most loyal, most wonderful person I have ever met.”

There are so many ways to describe him – completely unexpected, completely full of warmth and laughter and more love than she thought any human being was capable of containing. Loving Jake is endlessly surprising, but it’s also the easiest thing she’s ever done.

“I didn’t tell you because I knew you’d never approve of me being with someone who didn’t have ‘reputation’, but the truth is that Jake is good for me in a way that Teddy could never be. He is unconditionally supportive and thoughtful, and he sees me for me, not just as a status symbol or some idealised fairy-tale. I love him and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with him.”

She says her piece, affection flowing from her almost of its own accord. As she does, she’s flooded with memories – throwing grapes at each other at the picnic they shared in the wildflower meadows beyond the gates. Jake smuggling cupcakes to her to cheer her up on bad days. Him clumsily risking his life climbing through her bedroom window just to help her rehearse her big address at a formal dinner, planting a kiss on her forehead every time she got through a cue card.

Their walks around the castle grounds, laughing at stupid inside jokes. Playing cards in the kitchens with Charles, Terry and Rosa. Teaching him how to paint and sketching him in increasingly ridiculous poses. Having dinner with his mom. Stealing away moments behind the stables and on staircases. Most vividly, their countless private rendezvous in the forest, free of all façades and responsibilities and reputations to uphold.

Amy refuses to hide any of it anymore – he is, openly and unashamedly, the man she loves.

No-one speaks, for a little while; she lets her honesty sink in. Her mother is wearing a look of abject horror – her dad’s expression is stony and unreadable, and it startles her when he is the first one to break the silence, directly addressing Rosa standing guard by the door.

“Diaz. Is all of this true?” Rosa glances at Amy, who gives her an encouraging nod. She knows her father has always valued Rosa’s directness as much as Amy does.

“Yes, sir.” She pauses. “And for the record, I’ve known both of these people a long time, and this is the happiest I’ve seen either of them. It’s kind of sickening, actually.”

Her parents exchange glances, a silent conversation Amy isn’t privy too – she’s too busy feeling her heart swell with further affection, this time for her best friend. She and Jake owe so much to Rosa helping them out, relaying messages back and forth and covering for them. When this is all over, Amy’s definitely embroidering a thank you pillow for her to punch.

“I see. Will you please bring this Jake Peralta here for me?” His tone is even and calm, almost unnervingly so. Rosa nods, quickly disappearing. She knows exactly where Jake will be; in the kitchens, probably stress eating day-old pastry and getting a last-minute pep talk from Charles (which is guaranteed to be largely unhelpful and delivered through hysterical tears).

She’d warned him that they’d probably want to meet him; he’d expressed anxiety about it last night, but Amy had quickly reassured him that no-one else’s opinion mattered to her about this. They’re getting married, whether her parents approve or not.

Obviously, she wants them to like him. She’s dedicated a lot of time to making sure he knows he is loved and accepted, and she’s willing to work even harder to wax lyrical about how wonderful he is for the rest of their lives if she has to. For now, though, she just has to focus on not getting them both exiled.

Her dad calmly asks her brothers to leave the table – Julian mutters in protest as he exits, only stopping to brightly clap Amy on the shoulder and earnestly congratulate her with an enthusiastic high five.

“He sounds great, mimi. I can’t wait to meet him.” For once, her older brother is completely sincere, save perhaps for the suggestive wink he gives her, and it’s a touching gesture that eases some of the relentless anxiety building in her gut. Amy dreads to think how insufferable the pair will be when they do finally meet. She can’t wait either.

Part of her is absolutely fucking terrified to be left alone with her parents with her open defiance and violation of their wishes hanging so ominously in the air – Amy Santiago has never been a rule breaker. She’s always worn the stupid fancy dresses even when she’s dying for something more practical and let Gina give her more and more complicated and ridiculous hairstyles and politely mingled with the endless line of boring high-status bachelors as her parents watched on hopefully. She’s always played the role of the only princess to perfection.

But then she thinks of little six-year-old Amy demanding that she be taught the same combat training as her brothers and twelve-year-old Amy petitioning to allow female members into the Royal Guard and, well. They really should have seen this coming from a mile away.

Thankfully, it doesn’t take long before Rosa strides back in, a clearly nervous Jake hurrying forward in her wake. For a moment, her original plan of whisking him away to start a simple life together swims into her head, a powerful urge to protect him surging over her.

But then their eyes meet, and he waves, a small nervous smile on his face. And then she notices, as it catches the sunlight streaming in through the window and glitters as if enchanted, the engagement ring hung proudly around his neck. And she just knows, as sure as the sun will rise, that they can handle anything.

“I understand that you are engaged to my Amy.”

“Yes, sir.” Jake rocks on his heels slightly, nervously fidgeting the way he always does when he’s anxious. “I’m very lucky to know her and I love her very much.” It’s not the most eloquent speech ever performed in this great hall, but it’s by far her favourite.

“How do I know you are good enough for my only daughter?”

“Oh, there’s no way I’m good enough for Amy. She’s the most incredible person I’ve ever met and the best thing that’s happened to me.” He steps closer to her, silently taking and squeezing her hand as he speaks. “But she still chose me, and I promise you that I will spend every moment of the rest of my life trying to be someone worthy of being loved by her.”

She wants to scream from the top of her lungs that he is completely and utterly good enough, and she wants to hurt anyone who has ever made him feel otherwise. Instead, she squeezes back, and mouths I love you while her parents exchange another hushed conversation.

“Well then - it appears there’s nothing we can do to stop you. Nor do I think we should try.” It could be a trick of the light, but she swears that she sees a glimmer of pride in her father’s eye. Her mom clears her throat, clearly still struggling to comprehend the situation.

“Mija, what we want most for you is for you to be happy. Does he make you happy?” She asks – Amy glances at the man beside her and finds her best friend, her fiancé, her favourite person. Easiest solve in the world.

“More than anything.”

“Then that settles that. You two have our blessing.” Her father says, as simply as if he was commenting on the weather. Amy blinks once, then again, her grip on Jake’s hand getting tighter.

“We…we do?”

“Yes, you do. We clearly have much to discuss, but I must first inform Prince Theodore that other arrangements need to be made.”

“I…wow. Thank you. Thank you, so much, I…” Her brain appears to be malfunctioning, so she does the only thing that feels right; she hugs her parents, whispering another strangled thank you, and then hastily pulls a stunned Jake out of the room, now squeezing his hand so tightly it’s probably cutting off all the circulation. If it does hurt, he doesn’t say anything – then again, in the moment neither of them seems able to speak.

She drags him into the nearest room; Holt’s classroom which, blessedly, is currently empty. Heart pounding, she finally meets Jakes gaze. He looks like he’s just found the end of a rainbow.

“Did they just…”

“Yeah. Yes. I think they did.”

“So, we’re…”

“Getting married. Yep. That is a thing that is officially happening.”

There’s a single moment before they’re both collapsing into shocked, near-hysterical laughter, an amalgamation of relief, disbelief, exhaustion and above all else, joy. Amy practically throws herself around him, performing some kind of strangled hybrid of laughing and crying as she buries herself into his shirt.

They stay like that for a while, completely wrapped up in each other. It could be seconds or minutes or maybe even hours – she doesn’t care. Time has ruled their life together for so long; now, it’s an insignificant enemy, no longer precious, unpredictable or finite. It’s bliss.

“Hey, listen. Rosa told me, uh, what you said. To your parents. About me being the love of your life and all that.” Jake says, suddenly adorably shy.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. She said it with a disgusted look on her face, but I think she’s secretly rooting for us.”

Amy hums in contentment, making a note to call her a secret sap and then hug her the next time she sees her. Jake clears his throat nervously, calling her attention back to him, all soft and warm honey gaze.

“You’re mine too, by the way.” He says sheepishly. “Just in case…I mean I hope you that know by now, but-“ She smothers his nervous ramblings with a firm kiss, finally. Finally, the abstract brush-strokes and subtle hues of the future they could have together come into sharp focus, vivid and prismatic.

“I love you.”

“I love you too, future wife.” He grins, kissing her again. She’s sure, now, as her lips meld to his that he is the person she was always meant to come home to, to find a home in.

Amy feels a wave of exhaustion overwhelm her; now that the adrenaline is wearing off, the unfortunate side-effects of not sleeping for almost twenty-four hours rapidly take hold. She barely suppresses a yawn, scrunching up her nose as Jake looks at her fondly.

“You wanna go back to bed? I happen to know an excellent nap partner.”

“Oh, great, me too. I’ll see if Hitchcock’s available.” She says, laughing when Jake pouts in offence, draping her arms around him, leaning up so that their noses are almost touching.

“It’s our first day together as an engaged couple. I want to do something special.”

“Ames, we have the rest of our lives to do something special.” He says, gazing down at her with so much undiluted affection that her resolve completely melts away. The rest of their lives. She really likes the sound of that.

“Okay, napping sounds pretty good right now too.”

“Good, because we have about five minutes until I collapse from twelve hours straight of nervous hysteria. Would you mind carrying me to your bedroom?”

She rolls her eyes and shoves him, but also offers him her hand. They soon collapse into Amy’s four-poster bed, quickly pulling the covers over their heads, wriggling around and fighting for space while they giggle like little kids. Amy sleepily leans into him when they’re all settled in, and she’s never felt safer than she does now, being lulled to sleep by the steady rise and fall of his chest.

“We’re getting married.” She whispers reverently, eyelids heavy – she feels his lips gently ghost against the top of her head in response, perhaps subconsciously as if he were made to do it. They drift off, and the last of her anxiety ebbs and flows away as if merely a bad memory.

It’s the best sleep either of them has had for months.

#b99 #b99 fic #peraltiago #jake x amy #my writing #we love a passion project #listen i haven't stopped thinking about this au for MONTHS. so here you go. welcome to my twisted mind #if you do decide to read thank you very much for indulging me :')#shut up sian #oh and also happy trying eve everyone! thought i'd get this out before we all die

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saihahas · 4 years

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The sheer brilliance of the Pikmin shorts

And how their success shows that a cartoon with no dialog can excel in quality.

This is going to be seperated into three portions, for each short! Short 1 will be titled in RED. Short 2 will be titled in BLUE. Short 3 will be titled in PURPLE.

SHORT 1

Short one, The Night Juicer, is my least favorite out of the three. Granted, I still really enjoy the short! But it's not memorable in comparison to the other two. It's the shortest, and plays off of what Pikmin are named after! For those not aware of Pikmin lore or the games, Pikmin were named based off of Pikpik Carrots, which are very popular on Capitan Olimar's home planet, Hocotate.

This short begins with a very cute title sequence, showing Pikmin just doing Pikmin things! Which the series is exceptional at.

The first short starts with a Red, Blue and Yellow Pikmin watching Olimar make himself an unassuming red smoothie.

A lil squeaky sound effect is made when Oli puts his hands on his hips, thats all.

ANYWAYS-

The Primary Pikmin trio all run up to Olimar as he finishes up his cup, but stop after glancing over to the side of the blender, seeing a cut up Pikpik carrot they mistake for a Red Pikmin.

This sends the trio into a frenzy, freaking out and running away from Olimar.

Oh and this

Consider my timbers, shivered. Olimar creepily walks towards them, as if it was a horror movie. The trio fantasize what will become of them once Olimar catches them, while trying to get as far away from him as possible.

Olimar corners them in the storage closet, and the trio fear the worst. Only for Olimar to daintily push them to the side, and pick up two pikpik carrots for another smoothie.

All in all, this short isn't bad! It's cute and simple, a jokey horror trope. It simply suffers the fate most pilot episodes do. The other two are much less Olimar centered, and shine as a result.

SHORT 2

Short 2, Treasure in a Bottle, is my second favorite of the trio, but it definitely is close to overtaking short 3. This series is devoid of Olimar entirely, focused on Pikmin interacting with eachother. (And our protag, a Red Pikmin's desire for the shiny)

Short 2 starts out with a Red Pikmin, lets call him Steve, in a field chasing a butterfly. He gets distracted by a bottle, and proceeds to stare at his reflection in the glass.

The ramune is giant in comparison to Steve, and then he notices the shine of the marble inside. He screams in excitement, before scaling multiple objects to reach the top of the ramune bottle. (After falling off a grass blade gently)

Steve marvels at the marble, and hops into the bottle. He notices the long way down from where the marble lies and shudders, determined to roll the marble out. He attempts several times to do so, and on his last attempt, the marble gets stuck. After a few seconds, the marble falls and steve lands at the bottom of the bottle, and can't get out. While stuck, a trio of a single red, blue and yellow Pikmin come across Steve!

After laughing about how silly he looks inside the bottle, the trio tries to come up with a plan to break Steve out. Blue suggests filling the bottle with water, so Steve floats to the top and can be pulled off. Steve quickly shuts the idea down, as all Pikmin aside from blue Pikmin can't swim. Yellow has a much more direct approach, grabbing a bomb rock and allowing it to detonate, launching the bottle into the air. Steve flies out of the bottle, but as the bottle lands on the ground, Steve falls back into the bottle.

The three watch a trio of blue pikmin latched to eachother trying to pull down a butterfly, before a purple adds too much weight and the butterfly gets away. The trio has an idea, and like that Steve is saved!!!!

But not without taking the ramune with him ;)

SHORT 3

The final and longest Pikmin short, Occupational Hazard, is easily the best of the three in my opinion. It has Olimar present, but he isn't the focus of the short, the pikmin doing their thing are!

The short starts off showing some Pikmin taking apart pieces of a large machine, carrying bits ans pieces along, with come cute slapstick type comedy throughout. The camera pans out, showing how small the pikmin are compared to PNF-404 (Earth)

A quick pan later, and Olimar appears! He's using his whistle to direct Pikmin on where to go, much like in the games. The Pikmin are catapulting eachother, two go down, one comes up. They all carry the bits of metal to the Reasearch Pod, which assesses value. The Pod takes a brief leave, panning over Olimar and the Pikmin.

What a great shot

A yellow pikmin gets catapulted, offering a bent nail, which Olimar declines. The pikmin tosses the nail over the edge, hitting a white pikmin on the head. (Which they are VERY angry about) Two blue attempt to pull up a purple Pikmin, which was definitely unsuccessful, followed by a very angry white Pikmin yelling and taking his spot, only to be flung into the stratosphere after two purple Pikmin come down the catapult.

Back to business as usual.

The camera pans to some yellow Pikmin making their way inside the machine itself! Some yellows are carrying materials, but two stop and notice a small bolt. One touches it and gets shocked, followed by both touching it, and their leaves sprout into bulbs and flash, as they made a current! A blue tries to join in on the fun, but dies, as they can't conduct electricity. Poor guy :(

A small group of Pikmin sneak off to some pipes, ready to go have some fun! A blue Pikmin kicks a red through a pipe, and we get a cute transition to the other side of the pipes! A yellow pulls out a mushroom, a red and blue pull out screws and, there's a cute mario reference with a red Pikmin! Our lovely gang finds an odd looking pipe and decide to check it out, only for it to have been the snout of a Blowhog! It spews fire before emerging from the pipes, nearly burning the group. Luckily for them, some red Pikmin take on the Blowhog, because they're fire resistant. The red Pikmin are playing with thr Blowhog, despite it still chasing their friends around breathing fire. Luckily AGAIN, the Blowhog trips, and lands in the mud, its snout being filled with it. Naturally, they decide to have fun with the mud.

Back to Olimar and the construction site, my absolute favorite piece of pikmin media occurs. (Spliced 4 convenience, sound on!!!)

Something very big in these shorts are exaggerated reactions as well as music and sound effects playing to convey a specific feeling. Pikmin do not speak, and neither does Olimar. But in these shorts, their small soundbytes are able to convey what the pikmin are saying to eachother. This method of sound design is done extremely well, and I would argue to say that if these shorts prove anything at all, it's that nintendo could make a TV series that has no dialog whatsoever, and still have the audience rolling on thr floor laughing.

Back to the mud buds, we get a few more shots of them playing before yellow gets distracted. The shiny strikes again. Yellow walks into a large oil drum, and picks up a screw. Deeper in the drum, another sparkle catches his attention. Yellow picks the second up, and finds himself at a place with several odd colored objects. One of which he kicks.

It's a Bulborb!!! And its MAD. The mud buds are in trouble, and they're running as fast as they can from the Bulborb, who gets a red and blue Pikmin into its mouth. The two manage to get out through its nostrils, giving the others enough time to make a plan to outsmart the Bulborb.

A giant glove comes out of nowhere, halting the Bulborb and hypnotizing it, before flinging itself onto its backside. The glove was being controlled by an entourage of Pikmin, and the Bulborb catches on rather quickly, biting the glove and flinging the mud buds out. They all hide in a wheel rim(?) and some slapstick ensues.

Fed up with the mud bud's antics, the Bulborb kicks the rim, but hurts his toe instead. Poor guy,,, but he had it coming.

With a cute fanfare, we quickly return to Olimar, who has scaled the machine! But now his attention turns to the Bulborb that has been oddly fascinated with the rim.

The Bulborb finally manages to free the car wheel, throwing it into the air! Once it hits the ground, the mud buds all fall out, much to Olimar's dismay. And the way he struggles while whistling for the pikmin's attention is a BIG mood for people who've played the game before.

The mud buds start running to Olimar after hearing his call, much to the Bulborb's dismay. A chase ensues, and the Blowhog appears again, with its fire abilities regained. Rhe Bulborb continues to give chase, with two Pikmin meeting their demise. Everything seems hopeless, as the buds and Bulborb are huddled into the scoop of the machine.

And we get thrown back to the yellow Pikmin's party, with several linking to eachother and sparkling. One's foot touches the other's head, completing the current and turning the machine on.

The scoop gets sent upwards, as Olimar falls and lands on a lever, causing the scoop to let loose the contents inside. Right when it seems the buds are going to hit the ground along with the Bulborb, their leaves sprout into flowers! They gently float to the ground, while the Bulborb was.... not so lucky. A heavenly light shines as the gang ascend, with triumphant music in the background.

Oh and then all 97 pikmin left go ham on the bulborb.

The machine begins to deconstruct, and fall apart. More sadly relatable whistles from Olimar ensue, and uh

This happens.

After clearing the explosion, Olimar and the Pikmin look upon the wreckage, as the Pod reappears, and takes a value of the entire machine. The Pod asseses that the wreck is 100,000,000,007 pokos, and Olimar makes a triumphant pose. The white pikmin from earlier comes crashing down during the Fin. screen.

Now for my personal thoughts, while I have had some spread throughout, my final cohesive thoughts are as stated down below. Pikmin as a franchise has been dead for a while. We got a reboot of Pikmin 3 this year, and these were reuploaded from the WiiU era. The overwhelmingly positive response from the community as well as non-pikmin fans is second to none. These short style, no dialog cartoons have worked for Nintendo for years. (If anyone remembers the Yoshi and Poochy shorts I love you) This series is phenomenal at conceying emotion, or the volume of the situation, without saying a single word. The pikmin scream in excitement, they make their little noises in anger, dings and drones are placed perfectly, so EVERYONE can understand the situation. I fully believe that more companies should view these cartoons as cartoons, and give them the spotlight as well. Each short remains the length it has to be, and shows some fun content at that. The Pikmin interacting with eachother and behaving the way they do is adorable, especially when in the Pikilopedia from the games, Olimar mentions specifically they act like toddlers. Toddlers who help him not miss his own kids as much, while stranded on PNF-404.

If you wanna give the series a view for yourself, I'll provide the thinks below!!

youtube

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xoruffitup · 5 years

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The Report & Marriage Story: Adam Driver at TIFF

(If you just want to skip down to one/both of the film recaps, scroll on down to The Report and Marriage Story bolded headings. :)) There are some pics and vids down there too!)

So my friend Sarah and I spent just over 24 hours in Toronto, and it’s no exaggeration to say that during those 24 hours Adam made us feel the entire spectrum of every single possible human emotion. The Report was a nerve-wracking, intelligent, quick-witted political drama set at a break-neck pace of horrific headline after shuddering truth after sickening revelation. Marriage Story was nothing short of a masterpiece - delivering laughs, heartbreak, emotional turmoil, tears, and aching poignancy. I’m not usually one for romantic or real-life dramas like Marriage Story, but damn if that film wasn’t literally one of the most moving and powerful pieces of cinema I’ve seen in recent memory. The Report rises to the same standards, but for completely different reasons.

The films themselves are so incredibly well made in terms of writing and production, but seeing Adam in two major leading roles back to back that couldn’t have been more utterly different in tone or persona was nothing short of flooring. I know this, and of course most of you reading this also know, but GOD it isn’t even possible to fully describe the breadth and sheer force of Adam’s talent. The performances were light years apart, and yet both seared with completely unique energy that just radiated off the screen. I’ve watched almost everything Adam has appeared in, I know he’s the best actor of his generation, and yet he still manages to completely stun me with his seemingly never-ending ability to reveal an entirely different way of being in a new role. Beyond simply an accent or posture, Adam has this unparalleled ability to not only embody a completely novel persona each time, but to then completely naturally reveal that persona’s deepest, truest essence with the smallest facial twitch, turn of his head, or break in his voice. Watching him in a fresh role is literally like discovering a new facet of the human experience.

Watching these superb films in a setting like this massive film festival, where the audience was riveted and excited to engage with the content, elevated both of the viewing experiences to monumental heights. THEN, there was the fact that before and after each screening, Adam and the rest of the main cast members would come on stage with the director to speak about the film and answer questions. This of course meant – being me – that even the slightest glimpse of him would send me into silent fits of glee and awe. So combine being in Adam’s presence repeatedly and for rather long stretches of time with the emotional hurricane powerhouse of not just one but two film epics, ANNND yup it was a recipe for Biggest Emotional Rollercoaster Trainwreck Ever Known To Man. :’)

I did (somehow) manage to keep myself together! Enough so that I asked Adam a question during the Marriage Story Q&A! ;_____; (Sarah was trying to film covertly so needed a second to achieve that zoom action!)

vimeo

I couldn’t even tell you how it’s possible to string two coherent words together while speaking to 6’2” of well-dressed Talented Babe who’s fucking radiant in person, because it’s literally like an out-of-body experience where some alter ego screaming ‘TALK! TO! HIM!’ just takes over my body while the rest of me is floating off into the stratosphere!!!! (Skip on down to the Marriage Story movie analysis for more info on what I was asking about.)

Okay so let me back up and go through the day chronologically so I have SOME organization for my fangirl thoughts!

I got into Toronto from a 14-hour bus ride at 8:30 AM; Sarah got in on a flight at 9:30. We met up at our hotel and went straight to the theatre where the premium screenings would be taking place. We were able to get front barrier spots along the street and who soon arrived but none other than….!

Our lord and savior Rian Johnson, all hail! He directed the movie Knives Out that was playing at 11 AM in the same theatre. We took turns grabbing coffees because brrrr the Toronto morning was a bit nippy. The Report screening was scheduled to start at 1:45, but none of the cast had shown up yet as of 1:00. Shortly after, big cars started to pull up and Annette Bening and Jon Hamm arrived! We started nail-biting a bit at this point, because we needed to get into the theater 15 minutes before the movie started otherwise they might give our tickets away to people in the Rush Ticket line, but Adam hadn’t arrived yet and there was a chance he would sign for the barricade when he did. But once it started ticking below 15 minutes and still no sign of Adam (tension was real – the whole crowd would go quiet every time a car pulled up, then all sigh in disappointment when someone other than Adam got out), we called it and went to join the Ticketholder line to enter theatre.

WELL, good thing we did! Turns out Adam arrived late and had to rush inside right away, and we had the very serendipitous timing of walking past the secret elevator entrance up into the theater RIGHT when the elevator doors opened and Adam appeared, walking out and into the theater auditorium!! My heart slapped me in the face a bit (a lot) when we caught that glimpse of him so close up. I know there are plenty of pics now but he looked sO striking and sleek in that understated, classic blue suit. He’s SO taLL and still so massive when he’s a few feet away, don’t worry guys he looked plenty healthy even if without the Kylo Ren bulk <333 IT WAS GREAT. I COULD CRY ABOUT JUST THAT MOMENT. God help me with everything that would follow :’’’’’)

Before The Report started, Director Scott Z Burns came on stage to give a brief introduction. This was the first time the film was screening outside of the US and he was very much looking forward to the response and a wider dialogue about the issues raised in the film. He introduced the cast, and was joined on stage by the producer, Jon Hamm (who came on stage in a very silly fashion – see vid below), Annette Bening, and then Adam. And damn if that man didn’t look even MORE drop dead beautiful up there in stage lights. Be still, my heart.

…fat chance of that happening, because my heart was about to rev up into breakneck pace for the following 2.5 hours of the film.

The Report (We’re about to get very spoilery, fair warning!)

Movies are often called “important.” This one is more than that; it is imperative. The tragedy that will plague this film is that much like the staffers of the Senate and CIA that bicker back and forth throughout the decade chronicled in this movie; unproductive bickering will continue between those who appreciate a difficult truth-seeking film like this, and those that will disparage it knowing only the bare minimum of its premise. The latter will do so because of their unswerving understanding of American Patriotism to mean that America comes first, that there’s no justification more ironclad and unquestionable than national security, and America wins no matter the cost.

But. If by some miracle, the people of that latter group could be corralled into watching this film, it just might change their minds.

This movie is difficult. It is horrifying, at times nauseating. It challenges you as the investigations and counter-investigations build over each other, as the conflicting characterizations of the Enhanced Interrogation Techniques (EIT) program multiply, and yet even for all that, its takeaway hits you with clarity that is both sobering and impartial.

“National security” rationales were a chimera for barbarisms that achieved nothing. The US government tortured, degraded, and murdered prisoners at its mercy for no demonstrable reason or result. One of the most on-the-nose scenes where all the many moving parts of this complex, dirty history come together is when Dan meets with a New York Times journalist in his car towards the end, as he debates giving his report to the press to release when he fears government red tape will never let it see the light of day. The reporter asks him something like, “Why did the CIA keep doing it, if it wasn’t working?”

After two head-spinning, sickening, revelatory two hours, Dan compresses it all down to something like: “After 9/11 everyone was scared, and the CIA used that fear to act with impunity. They resorted to illegal means to try to keep some control of the situation. They knew it was wrong, and they knew it wasn’t working, so they became more desperate for results to justify it. And it was easy, because the detainees looked different than us. They spoke a different language than us, with different values.”

And so it spiraled to darker and darker depths, in which one failure to produce information by dubious means was taken to justify the next escalation in interrogation techniques.

This is where I need to warn everyone that this is not easy viewing. This film doesn’t let you shy away from what these interrogation techniques really meant. It doesn’t sanitize. You will see waterboarding happening. You will see people naked and chained in cells. You will see glimpses of even worse depravities. And then you will see the psychologist contractors who came to the black sites and claimed with utterly clueless, infuriating impunity that no, they’d never interrogated a terrorist before; no, they didn’t know anything about international law or the rights to trial and legal counsel. (“You think he’s getting a trial?” one said skeptically when his techniques were questioned.) But what they did know was the human brain and how to break it down. Then, you will see the CIA top brass back in DC who never saw with their own eyes even an instant of the abuses they were blithely and sanctimoniously sanctioning.

This film poses the question of how one defines American Patriotism. Chances are, you’re not going to be much moved by the CIA staff’s understanding - who say in defense of their tactics, “It’s only illegal if it doesn’t work.” Then when it doesn’t work, who go on to baselessly credit their EIT program with the intelligence that led to Bin Laden’s capture.

Then, we have Dan Jones/Adam. Dan Jones, who spent literally five years of his life in a basement bunker researching and scraping details together about a program the CIA did everything they could to keep under lock and key. He persevered when the CIA refused to provide any documents, communications, or witnesses; when the CIA denied that they themselves internally questioned the effectiveness of the program; even when they accused him of stealing the documents he finally managed to get his hands on. When the real Dan Jones was brought on stage after the film ended, he received a minutes-long standing ovation that couldn’t have been more deserved.

Most of the audience would probably find it difficult to identify with that understanding of patriotism that claims “It’s only illegal if it doesn’t work” and “Shouldn’t we be grateful just for the fact that we live in a country where a report like this can be written?” (claimed by Jon Hamm as Obama’s Chief of Staff, when pressed by Bening’s Diane Feinstein about releasing the report before the mid-term shift of the Senate going Republican.) What’s much more moving is Feinstein’s rejoinder that “I want to live in a country that publishes this report.” Or the coup-de-grace scene towards the film’s end that incorporates real footage of John McCain’s speech on the Senate floor against the EIT program, when he introduced the McCain-Feinstein bill that would ban the practice. When McCain called on the US to be better than its enemies, and to maintain a standard of honor worth defending.

Dan puts it painfully aptly in the full monologue teased in the trailer: “They say they saved lives but what they really did was make it impossible to prosecute a mass murderer, because if what we did to him ever comes out in a court of law, the case is over. The guy planned 9/11… (continued from memory) … but instead of spending the rest of his life in jail, we turned him into the strongest recruiting tool for our enemies.”

These moments of Dan’s desperation to make others see the truth so glaringly, shamefully obvious to him are when he delivers his most biting rejoinders. As he questions John Yoo’s legal justification in the Torture Memo of the interrogations not amounting to torture so long as they don’t cause “lasting harm”, Dan points to the detainee who died under the conditions of his confinement and demands, “So how long is he going to be dead?!”

Okay so FINALLY, here’s where I turn to Adam’s oh so stellar performance. Adam mentioned in both the Q&A after this screening and in a previous interview that he had to learn the appropriate sense of “decorum” from Dan Jones that would befit a Senate staffer. Adam nailed it. He was playing a relatively low-ranking staffer, grappling with issues of abuse and mismanagement that would have incriminated all manner of public figures miles above him. He had no real power to do anything about the horrific truths he was unearthing, and yet there were too many moments when he seemed to be the only one who truly understood or cared for the truth. Adam played this tight-knit, occasionally fraying sense of necessary professionalism with just the right amount of restraint and understatement. His performance was never boisterous nor melodramatic. And yet, the ever more desperate edge to his dedication couldn’t have been more palpable. Adam’s performance delivered every bit of impact commensurate to the towering gravity of Dan Jones’ investigation.

And yet, for every bit that Adam’s performance remained appropriately understated (it never felt like anything but a true-to-life depiction; hardly ever making you aware you’re watching a dramatization), the depth and nuance in its subtlety was nothing short of masterful. His brief but singeing moments of frustration are short-lived but strike deeply. What really struck me though were two particularly powerful #King of Microexpressions moments.

When the threat of criminal charges for hacking into CIA records is raised against him and he sees a lawyer for the first time to assess his options. After he has to face the fact that this is more complicated than his repeated assertion that “I didn’t do it. I didn’t do it.” He’s quiet for a moment, then asks in a soft, defeated voice, “How long could I go away?” The camera zooms close on Adam’s face when the lawyer responds “twenty years.” Adam’s face barely changes, and yet you can see that number settling into him with pained horror alongside incomprehension. It’s one of those moments where without saying anything, without barely even a gesture, Adam renders his character so desperately empathetic. As the viewer, you realize at that moment you’ve been building an irresistible and compelling emotional connection to him since the second you saw him the first time, and he didn’t even make you aware he was doing it.

The shot in the trailer of him sitting at a desk between the two giant stacks of his report papers. This is when the Senate Intelligence Committee is taking a vote whether to recommend the investigation for further action. I’m pretty sure Adam didn’t say a single line in this scene. Senator Feinstein called the Committee to vote, and as the voices around the table chime “aye” or “nay,” the camera does a slow pan on Dan sitting there, listening with his hands folded. You can barely trace the shifts in his expression. You can barely see anything discernible in his face, and yet simply by the way his shoulders move, the way his jaw shifts every so slightly, and the way he blinks – you’re right there on the edge of your seat with him. You can feel in your very soul his repressed, barely-controlled sense of desperation as the report that’s become his life’s work is put to a vote of either life or death.

Guys, just in case you didn’t realize this by now… Adam is a wonder and it simply defies my understanding how everyone in the whole world hasn’t come to consensus by now that he invented acting and everyone else can just go home and let him play every role ever.

Okay now the one kind of amusing bit in the film! Sadly most audience members won’t get the same kick out of this that we will, but Joanne is in the film playing a CIA staffer. She and Adam share one scene, in which she walks up to him and says, “Your face and your report are bullshit.”

INCREDIBLE. Roast your man, Joanne.

Although the movie tries to tie things up with the McCain-Feinstein anti-torture amendment that ended the EIT program and shows a quote by George Washington before the credits (in what to me seemed a bit of a forced attempt to put a comforting lid on everything) what left me feeling most helpless and frustrated was seeing how partisan politics repeatedly derailed meaningful action against the EIT program throughout the entire span of the film, and knowing full well that that’s exactly how DC still operates. There’s a scene where the timing of publishing the report is being debated. (“If we push this now, the Republicans will pull gun control. What if they pull healthcare?”) And to me, the most infuriating part is seeing the ethics by which our government runs constantly reduced to mere bargaining chips.

It seems there are no absolute lines of the permissible and impermissible. As we see, the CIA got away with torturing unarmed prisoners for years because they disguised it behind code words, wrapped it in nonsensical legal jargon to authorize it, engaged in some serious doublethink and called it a day. Constant debates that twist and manipulate the issues at stake can reduce every law to subjective application. Fallacies in logic and gruesome vengeance disguised as national security measures are defended without shame. The same modes of thinking that started the EIT program and sustained it for year upon shameful, unsuccessful year continue spinning the wheels of today’s destructive and shortsighted policies of self-interest and American exceptionalism.

OKAY, I’m off my soapbox now. Promise.

But last thing. Think about this for a crazy minute: Dan Jones’s report in full was some 7,000 pages. The only version that was ever published was heavily redacted down to a few hundred. What an incredible feat of scriptwriting that a five-year investigation that produced 7,000 pages worth of text was condensed down into a 2 hour movie.

((Also – I kept thinking at regular interviews during the film that holy shit this is giving me such strong vibes of my Presidential staffer Ben in my modern politics AU and I LOVED IT. I’m so extra inspired to press on writing!!))

End Spoilers: The Q&A afterwards! After the audience spent a few minutes giving Daniel Jones his much-deserved minutes of applause, the panel moderator started with a few questions, and here Jon Hamm and Annette Bening immediately started messing with Adam. (It’s clear they’re all buddies who love each other and I appreciate it so much :3) Whenever questions were posed generally to the cast, they would both immediately start passing the microphones down the line towards Adam, knowing full well that he wouldn’t want to talk but nudging him to do so anyway >:)) At one point he wound up with two microphones at the same time and started desperately shoving one back at Annette! For one question, before the microphones could be thrust upon him, as soon as Jon looked over towards him Adam sidestepped back behind the group and turned to start feeling the screen like he was looking for a way out. Lskdjflaskj DORK <3 Annette immediately teased him like “There’s no door, Adam!” and then on a later question that was also posed to “the cast,” Jon and Adam both started pretending to look for a door together. :’)

When responding to a question about what drew him to the role, Adam made a really interesting comment about Dan as a character who “gets the instructions for something to build, and it turns out he was building his own gallows.” (Video below!) He also spoke a bit as to the fact that he was intrigued to create a clear depiction of the internal effort to fact-find and implement accountability about such a contested, tangled issue for which a whole PR campaign existed to defend, even with misinformation.

vimeo

Have I mentioned how GOOD he looked in that suit?! Somehow he looked extra tall, I thought. And again, I know people are concerned about how thin he is right now, but he really looked fine!! His face is definitely a bit thinner, but his face shape has often changed along with his physique whenever he’s buffed up or down. He still looked plenty solid and very very damn pretty. >:3

Being the adoring fangirls we are, we’re well familiar with Adam’s ~discomfort or stiffness when he’s forced to be in public and speak at things like this. (We love one (1) awkward antisocial man.) During this panel, even though his answers had his usual introspection and self-deprecating, unconscious charm, he seemed to have an extra air of seriousness/attentiveness to him when listening to others’ comments or to audience questions. While he was giving the serious topic every bit the gravity it deserved, he also seemed to be conscious of not seeming partisan to any particular political outlook? I mean, the audience would often clap when someone on the panel said something about how the takeaways from the film are still relevant to the dysfunction and hypocrisy in today’s political climate. Adam would join in the clapping, but something I’ve always respected about him is that he never infuses his persona opinions – whatever they may be – with discussion of his work or his approach to it. I think it takes a lot of hubris and self-awareness to maintain that distinction, and resist the temptation to use a public platform to advance your own opinions. But he never seems remotely interested in any such thing. AITAF advocacy is maybe the closest, but even in that context he remains very restrained.

Did I mention he looked Beautiful like a damn vision? ;____;

Okay so leaving the theatre, my and Sarah’s heads were reeling. There was SO much to process and discuss from the film, we were grabbing onto our favorite lines and moments to recall, which launched us into discussion about political affairs today, interspersed with the occasional “Can you BELIEVE Adam’s Power in that one scene?!” and basically it was my absolute favorite kind of impassioned conversation ever. <333

Time was ticking though, and just before 5 we needed to head back to the theater entrance before Marriage Story started at 5:30. Okay and here – as if we hadn’t already endured enough emotional walloping today – came two massive emotional rollercoasters right after the other! With how little time we had between the films, it was difficult for us to get into the red carpet crowd just beforehand. But as we turned the corner, we heard shouts of his name and !!!!!! there he was outside signing!! Bless his heart, he was across the street from the theatre signing for the long line of people on the other side who I hadn’t seen anyone go over to that morning. :’) Sarah and I ran over to try to join the end of the line and he almooooost got down to us, but it was a little too dicey with the line being kind of chaotic where the barrier ended. But WE WERE SO CLOSE TO HIM. HE WAS RADIANT EVEN WHILE LOOKING ADORABLY SLIGHTLY GRUMPY WHILE HE UNCOMPLAININGLY TOOK PHOTOS AND HE’S THE BEST AND MOST EXQUISITE EVER

I can just imagine in his head like halfway down that line: “oh god this was a mistake. Adam what did you do.” <3333

Emotional rollercoaster moment #2: Because Adam and ScarJo were both out signing, the sidewalk right in front of the theater had been barricaded off. This meant that we weren’t allowed to enter the theater until they both went inside, which only left us a few minutes to spare! We rushed to the entrance, but alas there was a problem with scanning our tickets, so we were told to go to the Box Office to get them reprinted. We’re already on edge, afraid we’re going to miss the beginning of the film, when the woman at the Box Office tells us she can’t reprint the tickets because the name on them doesn’t match ours. (We bought them from a resale site so of course it didn’t…)

Even after showing her every email we had documenting payment and that the tickets were transferred through an official sale site, she remained adamant it was policy that she couldn’t print the tickets. Clearly, we were kind of devastated for a moment there, thinking we’d just paid way over face value for these tickets that weren’t even going to work. But Sarah, bless her soul, had the idea to leave, then go back in through a different door with a different ticket scanner person. The tickets still didn’t scan correctly, but we told the woman scanning that we’d already ambiguously “checked” with the box office, and honestly I think she was just a very nice person and could sense our Desperation, so SHE LET US IN. Woman – wherever you are right now, know that we love you and are forever indebted to you. ;___;

By the time we got to our seats, Noah Baumbach was already on stage introducing the film. But luckily we were in our seats, we had caught our breath and clutched each other in rejoicing relief before Noah introduced the cast and brought Adam and Scarlett on stage. Queue lots of enthusiastic applause! Someone in the audience yelled, “We love you Scarlett!” There were some whoops through the theater, then someone else yelled, “And we love you too, Adam!” and he did an adorable awk wave of appreciation and have I meNtiOnED this giant of a man is the softest and most precious being to ever grace this world????? And I’m not sure if it’s come up yet or if maybe I haven’t mentioned? But I really really really love him? ;____;

Thank gosh Sarah caught it! Painfully presh video of our painfully presh man!

Marriage Story: (Again, there will be spoilers)

Oh god, okay. This one was a beast of massively epic proportions that I was not nearly prepared for. It takes you on an intense fucking ride that spans every possible angle of passion between two people, ranging from love to hatred. To be entirely honest, I had gone into the day more excited for The Report because the subject matter was of such interest to me, and because I’m not usually one to really enjoy real-life dramas all that much.

But this fucking movie was Exquisite from the very first shot. The film opens with the “What I love about Nicole / What I love about Charlie” voice overs, and within the span of mere minutes you already feel deeply for these characters. You already feel as if they’ve been your close friends all your life, and instead of just entering your awareness abruptly – they’ve lived entire lives with ups and downs, mistakes and successes for as long as you can remember.

The movie is a sweeping epic, and yet remains achingly resonant and relatable. Charlie and Nicole’s relationship is passionate, fiery, and riddled with both miscommunications and repressed resentments. You rarely see a (doomed) love study played out with such complexity and fireworks. And yet, their frustrations, desires, and victories/losses both large and small are completely credible. Relationships are messy, and this film doesn’t shy away from their absolute darkest and even cruelest corners - even while maintaining sparkling moments of human connection that somehow survive alongside even the most difficult challenges.

The film is a brilliant study of contradictions. As Charlie and Nicole move through the divorce process, their control over it and the very narrative of their own lives becomes appropriated by their respective lawyers. The beginning of the film showed us the tenderness and deep understanding that exists between these characters, so the stories the legal teams spin seem ridiculously far afield from reality. The beginning of the film brought us into a rich world between these characters that was natural and so effortlessly believable (long, uncut monologues of dialogue; characters wandering from room to room as they talk – It’s masterfully and deceptively purposeful filmmaking that completely hides all trace of itself). Then later, listening to the lawyers concoct disingenuous legal narratives to “win” rather than tell any truth of reality is a towering contrast. The lawyers seize on the smallest tiny things Nicole or Charlie did in previous scenes (Nicole finishing a bottle of wine in one night with her family; Charlie forgetting to strap in their son’s car seat once) to paint them as habitual alcoholics or neglectful, absent parents. As the divorce proceedings escalate, things become distorted past recognition – twisted into abstracted and even absurd depictions of these two characters, between which we simply can’t decide whom we feel more sympathy for.

And then, following a gloves-off divorce hearing couched in legalese where neither side gives any quarter, you have a scene that’s quiet and effortlessly heartwarming. Nicole calls Charlie because the power’s out at her house and could he try to fix the power box in the front yard? He comes over, he works on the box, they pass their sleeping son between them (“Maybe he should just sleep here?” “But it’s my night.”), and then they both have to manually pull the gate on the driveway closed from either side – Nicole inside, Charlie outside. They look at each other as they pull the gate, perfectly in sync and their gazes locked, until the gate slides closed in the inches just between their faces. The movie is littered with these tiny gorgeous moments that just tear at your heart.

Or, the moment in the middle of negotiations between their lawyers when everyone decides to pause and order lunch. Charlie is handed the menu and he simply stares at it helplessly, uncomprehending because he’s still trying to work through the shock of their new reality that was just being argued over by the lawyers with such casual cruelty. Everyone stares at him for a long minute, until Nicole gently takes the menu from his hands and says, “I’ll order for him.” She knows just what to order – a salad with a specific type of dressing – and he quietly, almost absently agrees, “Yes, I’ll have that.”

The film takes pains to be even in presenting both sides of the story, and giving Nicole and Charlie equal screen time. I spent the entirety of the movie switching my sympathies back and forth between the two of them. By the film’s end, I understood both of their positions and experiences completely, as well as how much their perspectives on all they shared had come to oppose each other. Even though it’s impossible for either us or the characters to understand how they developed such divergent perspectives on their marriage, all parties involved have to face just how irreconcilable their grievances have become and how differently they each view the fundamental shortcomings of their marriage.

Being the annoying feminist viewer that I am, I was completely absorbed by Nicole’s monologue early on, the first time she meets with her lawyer (Laura Dern). She comes clean with the whole account of how she feels no control over her own life, and the longer she spent with Charlie and living in Charlie’s world, the “smaller” she was becoming. She felt that he didn’t respect her interests or her undertakings, when they weren’t connected to his theatre company. In essence, she feels she never got to be anything other than what he made her.

With that background of her position, I absolutely wanted Nicole to build her own life apart from him and find her own sense of personhood. One where she makes her own decisions and follows her own passions. In her recounting, she keeps saying that she’s used to part of her feeling “dead inside,” in terms of not feeling truly engaged with or in control of what she’s doing with her life. Taking a television acting job in California – separate from Charlie’s theatre company where she was the star under his direction, where he called the shots and she supported “his genius” – was the first time she did something bold for herself. This was also after repeatedly expressing to Charlie that she wanted to spend more time in California (where her family live), and Charlie never seeming to seriously consider the idea. Nicole felt she didn’t really have a voice, living shrouded in Charlie’s shadow.

But also being the annoying Adam fangirl I am, I was drawn in by Charlie’s charisma, by his effortless and guileless charm. I may have “sided” with Nicole towards the beginning of the story, resenting the small ways we could see that Charlie might have unconsciously been controlling (“Did you change your hair? I like it better long.”), but as the story progresses, so does Charlie’s unraveling. His world begins to crumble and fall apart before his very eyes, and even though he tries his best, he’s unable to do a single thing to stop it. Once Nicole gets her high-powered, cutthroat lawyer involved, things escalate beyond all control at breakneck pace. Suddenly he finds himself having to hire lawyers he can’t afford just to prevent the possibility that their 8 year old son Henry might move permanently to California with Nicole and Charlie might not get any custody; or that Nicole will take most of their shared assets and he’ll have nothing left to fund his theatre company with.

Neither of them mean for the negotiations to reach some vindictive heights, but suddenly they both find themselves fighting just to be able to live the life they each think is theirs.

Charlie finds himself having to move temporarily to California and rent an apartment so he can see his son and so Nicole’s lawyers can’t try to depict him as neglectful. We know he’s anything but. The first scenes in the film showed him being so patient and good with Henry that we could just about cry at the injustice.

(There’s the most darling scene at the beginning where little Henry comes into their bedroom, pokes Charlie saying “Dad? I had a nightmare.” Charlie gets up and comes to lay down in Henry’s bed with him. When he tries to get up, Henry asks him to stay, but there’s not really enough space for both of them in the bed so Charlie shifts to sleep on the floor. Queue a shuffling sequence where Henry goes to sleep on the floor next to his dad, Charlie goes up into the bed when it’s empty, then shortly thereafter Henry climbs up on top of Charlie so they both fit in the bed and fall asleep there. Yeah, MY HEART.)

As the accusations start flying when things are on the line during the divorce proceedings, this huge element of performativity comes into play. In a way it’s fitting, since they both work in theater, but these roles of enemies they suddenly have to perform is also terribly heartbreaking. (Also going back to the contrasts I mentioned earlier between the true essence of their relationship and their easy, ceaseless intimacy; vs the cold-hearted narratives forced on them both through the divorce proceedings.)

But in some ways, they’re not just playing the roles. There are two sides to passion, and just like they once cared about and loved each other so intensely (in some ways, they still do), there is also a shadow side to emotions of that intensity. In a catharsis that is much-needed after the austere, inhumane ways their relationship problems were discussed through their lawyers and absolutely devastating to watch in its destruction, their belated attempt to “talk” escalates into all-out war. “Talking” was the route Charlie first wanted to take – no lawyers involved – but which Nicole spurned. I was frustrated with her throughout the film for never fully communicating with him her expectations regarding their separation, but upon further reflection I understand that she might have feared that if they managed it on their own, it would turn into him managing it and her voice would once again disappear. Something along these lines rushes out during this scene of purging their demons and years of budding resentments and secrets all in one near-fatal blow.

(I’m about to quote a few sporadic lines I remember, but I have to say watching this scene with no idea of the savagery that was coming delivered absolutely lethal power, so I kind of advise not knowing the specific lines? Plus they’re a hundred times more powerful on screen, with these top-tier actors delivering them with every bit of feeling they possess. Skip to after both sets of ///// if you don’t want to know! But quoting here for those who don’t know if/when they’ll see the film ☺ These are definitely not in order and they jump around but whew, every moment when they were screaming these lines is simply unforgettable.)

/////////////////

Charlie: “Oh you just like to play the victim. We were happy. YOU were happy. Until you decided you weren’t anymore.”

Nicole: “You are just like your father!”

Charlie: “Don’t you EVER say that! Don’t you ever compare me to my father. You’re the one just like your mother. And your sister - you’re the worst of all of them combined.”

Nicole: “You slept with Donna!”

Charlie: “One time! Because you stopped having sex with me! For a whole year you shut me out and I didn’t know what to do. And after I gave up so much for you.”

Nicole: “Oh what you gave up?!”

Charlie: “I was in my 20s! I had my first solo work, I was successful, I wanted to fuck everyone but I didn’t. Because I loved you and I didn’t want to lose you. But I- I missed out on so much.”

Nicole: “You are SO selfish, you can’t even separate anything else from your own self-interest! You can’t even see me as something separate from yourself!”

Charlie: “So you hate me! You wish you’d never married me, fine, but god this last year it’s like you hated me!”

Nicole: “And I did! I do! (Screaming helplessly) I can’t believe I have to know you for the rest of my life!!”

Charlie: (Savagely snarling) “Maybe you don’t because I hope you get sick and die. I hope you get hit by a car tomorrow!”

///////////////

This scene escalates and escalates until they’re both in these uncontrollable, violent piques of rage. Charlie punches a hole in the wall, and things simply get uglier and uglier until they are screaming at each other the most horrible things each can think of with every bit of vitriol they can possibly muster. The build up in the scene is masterful, and the performances are simply stellar. You can feel that they are pissed as all hell at each other – that this is literally years of unspoken, repressed feelings all being torn out. But you can also feel that both of them are in such awful pain. Both of them are actively bleeding as the scene progresses, but it’s because both of them still care so much. It’s because there are still feelings there, and there always will be no matter what either of them do. That’s why the emotions are so desperate and searing off the screen.

After Charlie spits the final horrific line in her face, he sinks to the floor and weeps for it. It ends with her comforting him, and him putting his arms around her knees.

And – just fuck me up completely, why don’t you – if you thought that scene was the biggest beating your heart would have to take in this movie, THINK AGAIN BUDDY.

Because. Whew. My god. Words are going to fail me in describing this scene but I’ll do my best to go for it.

Months have passed since their fight, and grab every box of tissues in existence, because here’s the rumored scene where Adam sings “Being Alive” from Company. Now, I had somehow completely forgotten about this going into the film. So when Charlie stands up in the cabaret restaurant with his theatre group back in New York and starts jokingly singing the words when the pianist starts the song, I was just like ‘oh haha he’s singing! Wow!’

Charlie moves to sit back down after the first verse, still mostly fun and games…. But then the words draw him back as the song continues. He gravitates towards the small stage and the microphone, and little by little the joking edge melts away. Emotional gravity rises behind his voice little by little, until suddenly the words are loud and ringing and gorgeous, and there is palpable heartbreak in his eyes as the words begin to take the exact shape of all he has lost.

Now, we’ve heard snippets of Adam singing in Hungry Hearts and Inside Llewyn Davis and even briefly in Burn This. But. People…. You have never heard or seen anything like this. I don’t even mean from Adam. I mean… in your life. I mean: This scene literally stirred such a profound reaction in me; I didn’t know it was possible for an actor to evoke feelings like this. And imagine, this was on-screen performance. The entire theater applauded when the song ended, and I was in tears.

The song encapsulated in truly heartbreaking beauty the revelation Charlie was having of all he once had – every part of love that is both good and bad; cherished and difficult. And in possibly the most tragic contrast of the whole film: He is singing about love making it worthwhile to be alive – of how he’s now essentially left searching for what will now make his life worth living; while across the country Nicole is finally feeling “alive” for the first time, after years of being plagued by the feeling of part of her being dead beyond reach.

Yeah. I could spend thousands of words just trying to describe the devastating power and beauty of this scene, but no matter what words I use or how I phrase it, I’m going to come up short. It’s simply beyond description. Adam is beyond description. You’d think because I literally couldn’t love him more if my life depended on it that I couldn’t be so stunned by new demonstrations of his talent??? But jesus CHRIST. This man is a force that defies comprehension. To my ear, his voice sounded strong but untrained, and that was what made it so heartrendingly magnificent. In the held notes, his voice will crest into the gentlest vibrato as his emotions build, and I couldn’t tell you whether it’s the song that Adam disappears into, or if it’s Adam purposefully weaving every single element at play here into the most moving minutes of performance you’ve ever seen. Either way: The scene will ruin you utterly, and you will love it beyond comprehension.

I know a clip of this scene will certainly hit the internet as soon as the whole film becomes available, but god I almost wish that everyone has to watch it in context with everything that’s come before it. Because knowing every bit that Charlie has suffered along the way, understanding the way his heart is continuously breaking with each of the words-…. God, it’s too much.

Next up on Adam Driver Eviscerates Your Heart And You Thank Him Profusely For It: The scenes where he cries are just as painful as you think they’d be. Probably even more so, because he’s a talented jerk like that who takes no pity on us at all.

The first major crying scene is when he and his lawyer go off into a side room during a break in the first meeting on divorce terms. It’s just dawning on Charlie that Nicole probably has no intent to bring Henry back to New York, and unless Charlie does something serious, Henry might never live there with him again. While the lawyer’s talking, Charlie silently lowers his head, and suddenly the tears just rise up over him. It’s quiet and he only shakes slightly, but god do you feel for him.

The second time is…. lord, yet another moment that’s utterly heartbreaking and yet one of the most beautiful moments of film you’ve ever seen. This is the final scene in the film, and it references back to one of the first, where Charlie and Nicole try to go to a divorce counselor, who requests that they each write down the things they love about the other and then read them aloud. These are the lists each of them voiceover in the trailer and that play at the film’s very beginning. But during this session, Nicole refused to read her list aloud, because she didn’t “like what she wrote.” So Charlie never heard her list about him.

In this final scene, Charlie hears Henry reading something aloud in his bedroom. Henry had been struggling with reading, so Charlie immediately comes in to listen and help him. Charlie sits down on the bed with him, and realizes what it is Henry’s reading. Charlie helps him with the words he can’t pronounce, and then halfway through Henry hands him the list. “You finish reading it, Dad.”

Charlie continues reading the list, and it goes on much longer than the version we heard in Nicole’s voiceover. As Charlie’s reading aloud, Nicole appears in the doorway and begins to listen without Charlie realizing. He manages to read it all relatively evenly… until he reaches the end.

“I fell in love with him…” Charlie stops suddenly, and in an instant his mouth is trembling, the tears are brimming over, and he is fighting desperately to hold back the onslaught of tears in front of his son, even as it overtakes his entire body. Finally, he is able to finish: “I fell in love with him seconds after I saw him, and I’ll always love him. Even if it doesn’t make sense.” In the door, Nicole fights off her own tears.

This film is cinema at its very best. I know this is an incredibly bold statement, but: It just might be Adam’s best role to date.

End Spoilers: Q&A!

I WAS STILL SO STUNNED BY THE SINGING SCENE THAT I ASKED ADAM ABOUT IT AND JUST TO ROUND OUT FROM THE HAND TAKEN VIDEO ABOVE THIS IS THE OFFICIAL ONE AND THAT’S ME YOU CAN JUST BARELY HEAR AT 17:45!!!!!

youtube

CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT HAPPENED??? BECAUSE I CAN’T AND I WAS THERE. BYE I think I’m having an out of body experience taking in the fact that I’m watching this vid of Adam WATCHING ME OMG HE WAS SQUINTING INTO THE AUDIENCE TO SEE ME AND LEANING FORWARD TO HEAR ME SOMEONE HOLD ME I’M WEEPING HE WAS TALKING TO MEASKDFJALKSFJ

Ahem.

From Noah’s comments throughout the panel, it was amazing to hear how much of this movie was truly a collaborative process between him and Adam. In many ways, Noah built this role and film around Adam. He said that he and Adam had focused on the scene of him performing “Being Alive” very early on, and Noah structured the script to work towards that vision. Though he already had the idea of working in themes of performance and theatre, it was Adam’s idea to make Charlie a theatre director. I absolutely love hearing that Noah essentially wanted to make a film where elements of who Adam is in real life or his interests in what he wanted to play in a character were built into the heart of the script.

Someone asked Noah why he likes dysfunctional families so much and he replied “What other kind are there?”

Most of the other things said during the Q&A had already been echoed in other interviews. Plus I sometimes have trouble processing memories while Adam’s talking/standing in front of me because slkdjflsakjfdklsf just taking in the sight of him is a fucking lot to process :’’’’’’’)

“A fucking lot to process” is actually a perfectly apt summary of the day in its entirety! When Sarah and I got back to the hotel, we discovered it had a jacuzzi on the rooftop! That was truly the best soak ever, to soothe away the emotional overload and talk through all of our many, many thoughts on the two stellar films we’d just had the privilege of seeing.

Writing through this entire massive thing was also a huge help to work through all my complex feels about these films. As you might have gathered, I can’t recommend them highly enough. And as you also might suspect – Adam is an absolute force to be reckoned with in both. Seeing two of his most powerful performances ever back to back (and then getting to hear him talk about each in person!) was truly an experience I’ll never forget.

A massive thank you to anyone who persevered through reading all that!! I love writing analyses not only to work through my emotional response to sweeping works like this, but also to remember every bit of the impact. Give it a share if you don’t mind helping a girl out? :) I’m not on twitter at all so it’d be much appreciated!

(...have I mentioned I love Adam and I’m in awe of every single thing he does? Shower this man with Oscars already?!)

#Adam Driver #TIFF #driverdaily #Toronto International Film Festival #The Report #Marriage Story #TIFF 2019

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thewhiterabbit42 · 6 years

Text

Beard Kink

Part of Tantalizing Trickster Tuesday

Pairing: Gabriel x reader

Summary: Gabriel riles the reader up with a little extra something he’s brought on the hunt.

Written for: Anon - beard kink request and @spnkinkbingo

Square Filled: Free Space

Word Count: 1777

Tags/Warnings: beard kink, oral sex, brief fingering

A/N: It’s after midnight and I’m mangling what my beta fixed doing final edits. I bet she’s waking up with chills as we speak.

You still weren’t certain how he talked you into it. Probably because there wasn’t a whole lot of talking involved. He was all sly looks and subtle touches, priming you throughout the hunt until you were practically sprinting back to your motel room for some much needed self-release.

Imagine your surprise when you found him waiting just inside.

You still hadn’t made it more than a few steps in. There you were, leaning heavily against the door, stripped from the waist down with an enthusiastic archangel between your thighs. His technique was amazing, though you expected no less from someone with centuries to perfect it. What was really making you weak in the knees was the latest addition to his look.

“What is that on your face?” You didn’t mean to sound rude, but, really? He was going to show up with that and expect you to accomplish anything?

“Like it?” He struck a pose, trailing the back of his fingers along his jaw.

It had been your undoing. All those nights of careful dancing, of volleying back his flirtations and using every ounce of self-restraint, shattered by a well-trimmed beard.

“Oh fuck.” Your legs wobbled, exhaustion and a heady rush of desire nearly taking you to the floor. You latched onto the doorknob, simultaneously bracing yourself on his shoulder.

“Let go, sugar,” he murmured, his grace sweeping around your backside. “I got you.”

You didn’t have much of a choice. Worn muscles gave a final aching flair, unable to bear your weight any longer as his mouth latched back onto your clit and did something that defied reality. As promised, you didn’t end up on your ass. You simply dropped a few inches before being caught by something that reminded you of a warm blanket.

He ran his hands up your calves before grabbing you by the back of your knees and lifting your legs over his shoulders. They continued up your thighs, cresting over the curves of your backside. He indulged himself in a handful before easing you forward, cheek scraping along your inner thigh as he teased away from your sex.

You wriggled, enjoying every moment as he drew it out, the fire in your stomach igniting with every rub of his chin.

Cocky ass. You knew half the reason he did it was so he couldn’t be put in the one and done category. You’d have no choice but to remember him with the burn he was leaving.

It made you wonder what else he might do to ensure you thought of him the next day.

You carded your fingers through his curls, hips arching forward, seeking friction elsewhere again.

“Someone is nee-dy,” he chuckled.

He ran his tongue along your slit, and the way his fingers followed pulled a mew from your mouth. He sank one into you, your head dropping back against the door as he moaned against you.

“Father, you are soaked,” he breathed. “Mmmm, and so fucking warm.” You whined as he withdrew from you, his hands moving to steady your hips. A devious gleam overtook gold. “But I’m getting ahead of myself. I have big plans for you, and they start with undoing you with my mouth.”

You sucked in air as he traced his tongue along your folds.

“Then again with my hands.”

He kissed along your mound, intentionally ignoring that nexus of nerve endings you so desperately needed him to touch again.

“I think the third I’ll try both.”

His mouth landed chastely on your clit and you could have screamed when it was only enough to create a small spark of pleasure.

“Then, if you’re good, we’ll talk about what else I might have to please you with.”

A sinful smirk graced his features, and heat pooled further between your legs.

“I hope you can put your money where your mouth is, feathers.”

“Oh, I’ll put more than that here, sweetheart,” he promised.

He snapped, and you found yourself staring up at the stained tile ceiling, ensconced in fluffy lightness. Thinly padded and sagging springs were replaced by a down comforter on top of what might have been a cloud. You couldn't be sure, but the mattress itself was certainly large and airy enough to be one.

“Show off,” you sighed, throwing your arms back and enjoying the plushness surrounding you.

“Just you wait.”

He peeled off his jacket, and you looked up in time to watch him remove his shirt. You’d always wondered what lay beneath all those layers, and the lean but fit frame had you salivating more than washboard abs ever could. He looked real, not some divine specimen of perfection and a reminder that he was well and truly out of your league.

“Ah, ah,” he said, holding up a finger and waving it back and forth. “I don’t know where your head just went, but there will be none of that.”

He got up on the bed, dropping down onto his hands and knees. Honeyed hues became molten as he began to climb the length of you, his frame moving with feline grace. There was a predatory air about him, as if he might devour you at any moment.

The hunger in his stare when the rest of your clothes vanished suggested he might do just that.

“Now where should I start?” He questioned, eyes drinking in the sight of you. “I bet there are some nice, sensitive spots right here.” He nibbled along the side of your neck, sending goosebumps flourishing across your skin.

“These are always a crowd pleaser.” He slid lower, lips tracing over your collarbone before moving along the tops of your breasts. He brought his face down into your cleavage, the drag of his beard causing you to arch and push more of yourself against him.

“I bet I could make you come with these alone,” he rasped, grazing his cheek beneath a soft swell before his tongue darted out, flicking at a nipple. A strangled noise lodged in your throat, fingernails digging into his back as you urged him on.

“Or maybe I should finish where I started?” He continued lower, placing lazy, open mouthed kisses along your stomach, each one preceded by a wiry scratch from his chin.

You’d never had any man spend so much time on foreplay. Most were interested only in what was necessary to get you started. Gabriel, on the other hand, took his time, exploring every inch of skin, and by the time he hooked your legs around him once again, you were absolutely throbbing for him.

He lapped at your juices, probing into your slick channel and making you squirm. He had to hold you down, hands pressing your hips into the mattress when he finally returned to your clit, and the things he did with his tongue alone were going to ruin you for anyone else. Your legs tightened around him, and he began to move his head, rubbing his face along your thighs and sending you straight into the stratosphere.

You had never come so loudly - or hard - before in your life, the entire world inking around the edges as bright spots flashed across the back of your eyelids. Your body finally went slack, your hands tingling as you started to descend.

“Fuck,” you breathed, your legs shaking as he eased himself out from beneath them. There was no way you were going to survive another one of those.

“I hate to say it.” You really, really hated to. “But I’m not certain I’m up for a round two.”

You were sorely regretting not taking Dean up on his offer to relieve you earlier so you could catch a nap.

“Believe it or not, I can have that effect on people.”

You cracked an eye to find him positively preening, smugness splashing self-satisfied across his face.

“You’re not upset?”

Most guys you brought back would be, at best, making passive aggressive remarks while getting ready to leave, and, at worst, laying on the guilt trip or pressuring you to continue.

“Seriously?” His brow shot up. “I just wrecked you in a single orgasm. That’s a success in my book.”

He patted your thigh before sitting up, replacing his clothes in a single snap. A second comforter appeared in his hands and he buried you beneath it, making sure you were securely tucked in for the night. “Get some rest. You’ll need it for tomorrow.”

A satisfied smile adorned your face as you closed your eyes, the sound of the door opening and closing barely registering.

***

You couldn’t believe how tired you still were. There were muscles you’d forgotten existed, a pleasant soreness and exhaustion echoing with every movement you made. You could barely sit still, the hard booths of the diner not helping, but there was one discomfort that registered above all else.

And you could not have been more pleased.

“What’s got you in such a good mood?” Dean asked, his question more idle conversation as he scanned the menu.

You shifted your legs unconsciously, relishing the burn along your thighs. You thought back to shades of gold between your legs and you couldn’t keep your lips from curling at the edges. You came up with a suitable excuse, the words about to leave your tongue.

Before you could speak, someone else chimed in.

“Can’t a girl just smile?” Gabriel asked. “I know it’s a foreign concept for you Gloomchesters, but not everybody makes their living being tall, dark, and broody.”

His fingers drummed along the seat behind you, arm stretched casually along your shoulders. Every now and then his jacket would graze yours, and you weren’t certain whose awareness he was testing more: yours or your friends’.

“Remind me why you’re still here?” Dean demanded, features hardening as he glanced at the archangel.

Sam cleared his throat, and his brother resisted the urge to roll his eyes. “Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the help, but with most of the coven out of the way, cleaning up the stragglers should be like shooting fish in a barrel. Nothing I’d think would interest you.”

To be fair, it was a valid question. Even you had been surprised to find him waiting outside the Impala this morning.

“Normally, it wouldn’t, but…” He paused, running his fingers thoughtfully over the side of his mug before picking it up. “Believe it or not, it’s not all about you, Deana-rino, or Jolly Green there. I’ve got some unfinished business of my own.” He took a sip of his drink, eyes twinkling as they briefly met yours. “And I intend to stick around until I take care of it.”

Tags are open to anyone 18+. Send an ask to be added OR follow @rabbit-writes (my fic only side blog) and turn on notifications.

Friendly reminder: my blogs are 18+ only and may contain explicit content. By requesting to be added or following you are confirming you are old enough to view such material.

ALL the tags:

@girl-next-door-writes @fand0maniac @feelmyroarrrr @lucifer-in-leather @blondecoffeecake @tistai @room-with-a-cat @authoressskr @revwinchester @flufy07 @tardis-is-mine @tangle-of-ivy @luciferseclipse @mrswhozeewhatsis @protectivedestiel @angelofwinchester17 @phantomwarrior12 @jeanjeaniethings @wontlookaway @copperseraphim @fandomsrourlives @archangelgabriellives @shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @mizzezm @disneymarina @zpandaqueen @idabbleincrazy @katekvnes @han68000

Gabe Squad:

@bloodstained-porcelain-doll @lacqueluster @baritonechick @samikitten @kazosa @nobodys-baby-now @acarpouschimerical @cipherwheeldecoder @megasimpleplan4ever @azlinh @fruitypieq @koithings @booknerd1324 @the-kryomancer @karichanarts @sherlockedtash88 @archangelashiah @calamitychaos @erisunderthemoon @hankypranky @missihart23 @curious-trickster @gabegirrl86 @trickster-emissarie @crazyevilninja-is-lame @sweetmisseddreams2002 @bun-dpdbny

#gabriel x reader #lemon #gabriel oneshot #gabriel #spnkinkbingo #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural reader insert #rabbit writes #beard kink

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myrecompense · 5 years

Text

My Recompense || Main Verse

How events occurred from Mission 17+ Following on from V’s background. My Main Verse is merely one branch from this.

As V’s cane pierced into Urizen’s core, the essences of the two begin to merge, however the process was interrupted part-way by Dante who’d managed to get close enough to tackle V off Urizen. As the shock-wave blast from V’s actions struck, it propelled both V and Dante, tumbling them along the ground a distance.

Both sides were momentarily stunned from the crash. Bright blue light flashes from within the cracks of V’s skin, tattoos vanishing and his hair turning white briefly as his body restored, and he began to regain strength. V was still incomplete; Not Vergil, but certainly stable.

The Yamato lay on the ground between V and Dante, and at that realisation, both dive for the sword, with V being slightly closer and securing it. Holding it sheathed, V’s hair and tattoos return the signs of his familiar’s contract. The surrounding illusion of the Sparda family home began to shatter, and the remains of Urizen begin to boil down into a thick oozing puddle.

Unable to determine what sort of threat V now posed, Dante initiates an attack and verbalises his realisation of V’s identity. Nero is still in confusion. V blocks the attack but is, however, staggered and forced down to the ground. Nero comes to Dante’s side and the older devil hunter holds his blade pointed at his chest. V is forced to explain his actions leading them to this point while still processing what had just occurred within him himself.

Internally he could feel his will remained partially human. V could definitely feel some of his former tendencies as Vergil spurring him to try fight back and escape, but he knew logically that he would not be strong enough and suppressed the notion.

From the puddle of ooze rose another form, solidifying in the shape of a man. Vergil. As the transfer between V and Urizen had been enough to restore V’s form, so too apparently had it been to restore Vergil’s. Knowing Vergil would still be hostile towards them but still weak due both Dante’s and his own actions, V requests again that he be allowed to finish the fight himself, hoping for closure but Dante denies him, going to fight Vergil himself. V is allowed up and Both Vergil and Dante activate their Sin Devil Triggers in parallel and begin to duel once more. It would very quickly tip in Dante’s favour.

Nero walks forward intending to get involved, but the Yamato blocks his path. V tells him to stay back, and instead walks over himself, also collecting his cane on the way before opening a portal. Giving a familiar challenge salute that he knew Vergil would recognise from their time as Mundus’s servant, V passed through the portal, intending to lure Vergil away from Dante and Nero before his other half could be defeated. Vergil broke from combat, knowing he would need his full power to defeat Dante, and made chase after V with the portal closing behind them both.

Nero and Dante are left behind. Dante says he’s going to go finish off dealing with his brother and Nero again insists on helping to which Dante refuses to let him take part in, unsure himself yet as to what the outcome will be if he has to kill one or both parts of his brother. Stubbornly Nero tries again to which Dante finally snaps and explains: Vergil was Nero’s father. He briefly explained his suspicions before restating he would not allow Nero to be involved in what he had to do. Leaving the stunned Nero to find the rest of the DMC crew, Dante headed for the pinnacle of the Qliphoth where he sensed the others had gone.

At the top of the Qliphoth reaching high into the stratosphere, V and Vergil fought on fairly even terms. V had started with the advantage, retaining his familiars and wielding the Yamato. He could now dismiss his cane like a summoned weapon. Vergil was fighting unarmed and with his ghostly summoned swords. But when Vergil managed to disarm V of Yamato the power balance shifted slightly back to even. They were beginning to tire when Dante reached the top of the tree, interrupting the fight forcefully he tries to figure out what’s going on.

Restored to stability, V has concluded that the main threat to his survival is Vergil. They both sought power to protect themselves, and now that power was divided in two, Vergil was threatened, cornered and volatile.

While V still held his concern for the safety of the human world, it was not his first priority in this matter. He had come into his own being, and if he could defeat Vergil, then he would be safe. Like this, he wouldn’t have to re-merge with the other. His returning pride however would not allow him to let Dante confront Vergil for him. He had to resolve this himself.

Insecurities festering within Vergil from his returned human side reminded him how the world has always been set against him. With part of his power stolen and now residing in V, the by-product that was meant to waste away, now stood as his equal... Something he should have no right to. V was not a Son of Sparda. Vergil would destroy his other half and reclaim his full power as a perfected form of himself. Then he would fight Dante once more and fate would be what it may. It would be fair on his terms, and he would not lose. V and Dante would both die.

While both now existed in balance, V embodied Vergil’s pride and insecurity as a man, while Vergil was his pride and insecurity as a demon. Neither would allow Dante to finish the other off for that common thread that bound them. Dante attempted to convince them to stop by explaining Nero was their son, but although surprising, it only seemed to increase the resolve in both combatants.

As the fight resumed both warring for who would take the other down in their battle for survival, Dante attempted to stop them, however both combatants were determined to prevent further interference. Whenever Dante would attack either one of them, the other would block it so the fight remained fair between them. Whoever won, would win based on the agreement that they’d made when they passed through the portal.

Dante keeps on going in hopes he’s tire them out, but it would only ever be a temporary solution he knew his brother would never stay down for long. V and Vergil would continue this until Dante gave out and one claimed victory… And with the Qliphoth still growing its roots through the massive portal below, that didn’t mean good things for the human world.

Suddenly there’s an explosion and another flash of light, with the appearance of a fourth being, bursting from the ground and catching everyone off-guard. Separating all the combatants with his spectral wings and claws, Nero’s sudden appearance in his Devil Trigger form came as a surprise to all. He tossed them all apart to the ground. The devil within Vergil stirred in recognition of his son, unlike their previous encounters when his powers had not yet awoken... And that meant the boy’s experiences couldn’t be too dissimilar from his own. That bothered him.

Nero reverted to his human form, wings remaining however with their claws resting on his shoulders. Dante approaches again to try explain to Nero, but Nero’s not having any of it and sends him hurling to the ground again. Nero declares he wouldn’t allow any of them to kill each other, demanding another solution be found. While the proposition seems outlandish giving their shared family background, built on trust where there was little, it technically would solve both halves’ survival issues. The problem would be compliance with the agreement.

While it was agreeable to V and Dante, Vergil was less amenable towards it, still weary they would truly accept him. He issued a challenge: the price for his agreement. If he defeated Nero in combat, then he would be allowed to kill V and reclaim his full power without interference… However, as a demon that considered himself honourable, if he were defeated, he would accept the agreement. Dante doesn’t get a say in the bargaining, and V trusts his fate to Nero, nodding his permission.

The deal struck, battle ensues and in time, Nero is able to defeat Vergil, impressing his father with his strength. Dante is amused, but now in an agreed end of hostilities within the family, Nero draws their attention back to the Qliphoth. While he would stick to the agreement, Vergil maintained his pride claiming he could still fight however accepting the defeat wordlessly.

It was agreed after some argument on Nero’s part that they should all go, that only Dante and Vergil would deal with the Portal, leaving V and Nero to stay top-side to look after things in the human world. Dante leaps from the Qliphoth first as Vergil lingers looking back to V and Nero. A friendlier challenge is issued that they would duel again, and he wouldn’t lose next time before Vergil joins Dante headed for the Portal. V and Nero return to find the others, with V also giving Nero his book of poetry and explaining it had been his and Vergil’s, before they head to begin their next task of cleaning up all the stray lesser demons around Red Grave…

V now seeks to right the mistakes of his past and holds himself equally responsible to Vergil, the two bound in a parallel. But even with such intentions, bearing a list of sins so long, will he be able to find a means to pay his recompense?

#Part of me wants to write this out in actual full detail

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vampyr-boyfriend · 6 years

Text

RED ICE - Ch 5

Characters: Benjamin Viselli, Savage

Warnings: None

Words: 985

RED ICE Masterlist

Chapter Five - The Good, The Bad, and The Dirty

Thursday January 20, 2039 // 1:04am

A sleek black car pulls into the driveway of a grand estate, snow sticking to the building’s masonry, the moonlight illuminating each crystal to cast the illusion that the building is made of ice. The headlights dim as the engine dies and a dark figure slides out of the driver’s seat. They duck their head in a feeble attempt at fending off the snow as they make for the estate’s entrance and slip inside. The distant sound of soft piano melodies drifts throughout the building and the figure follows the noise up a spiral staircase and down a hall to a great mahogany door.

They knock and a silky voice invites them in. The door closes gently behind as they step toward the man behind the desk. He doesn’t look up from the tablet in his hand, its gentle blue glow illuminating his face in the dimly lit office. The music swirls around the figure, caressing his senses.

“I trust you were successful.” The man’s British accent dances through the room, in stark contrast to the deep voice that answers.

“I’m afraid not, sir. She wasn’t there.”

The man behind the desk pauses and finally looks up to regard his visitor, a stray lock of raven hair falling in front of an icy blue eye. He sets the tablet down gently on the table and sits upright in his plush desk chair, clasping his hands on the desk before him.

“Wasn’t there…” he purrs, thinking. The dark figure says nothing, waiting to speak as a moment of silence passes. “What of our insurance, have you heard from her?” The silence is finally broken.

The dark figure shuffles. “No, Mister Viselli.”

“What did you find in her apartment?” Viselli asks, fingers rising to stroke the sharp, clean-shaven angle of his jaw.

“Nothing noteworthy,” the visitor replies as he clasps his hands behind his back.

Viselli raises an eyebrow. “Everything is noteworthy.” His voice is like silk. “Come now, Savage. Think. What did you find?”

The visitor - Savage - nods softly as he recalls his visit to your apartment. “It was… bare,” he starts. “No pictures of family or friends, no decorations. The only plant she had was a succulent arrangement. It’s… as if she doesn’t own anything without a purpose.”

Viselli reclines back in his chair, fingers once more stroking his chin. “So, no plants that have to be tended to regularly, no pictures or paintings, no little plug-in water fountains or bonsai trees...”

Savage nods once in confirmation.

“Interesting. See, Savage, you say you found nothing and yet what you’ve just told me lets me know that she is a very practical person. No pictures of family or friends, so not one for sentiment. No plants to take care of regularly means she’s not home often, though that we already knew. Hours at the DPD are…” Viselli smirked, “killer. What else?”

“Well…” Savage thought some more. “There was only one chair in her kitchen and a small table.”

“No visitors, then,” Viselli concluded and Savage continued.

“I didn’t find a tablet. There was no mail - opened or unopened - no journal, no hollow book hiding anything - and trust me when I say I looked - no pets, no hidden safes.” Savage shrugged regretfully. “I’m sorry, boss.”

Viselli nodded again, studying Savage. “She was likely with the robot. Unlucky on our part; we couldn’t have known she’d pay him a visit, especially so late at night. Her absence wasn’t your fault, and so you shan’t be punished for it.”

Savage bowed low. “Thank you, sir.”

The phone on Viselli’s desk buzzed and he studied the number carefully before answering. He said nothing, but allowed the voice on the other line to speak. As he listened, he took a deep breath in, set his jaw, and sat up straight. The call ended and he returned his phone to its place on the desk.

“Black is at St. John’s Hospital, unconscious. It appears that she was unsuccessful as well. Unfortunately, this puts her in a rather… unfavorable situation. She will have to be dealt with, and quickly, lest Sherlock and Watson get to her first.”

“I’ll handle it,” Savage said, but Viselli put a hand up.

“You’re too conspicuous. I’ll send Morgue; she can pose as a nurse and slip in and out unnoticed. Black will be dead, Morgue will exit the hospital, and the detective and her robot pet will be none the wiser.”

“An excellent plan, sir,” Savage smirked, earning him a grimace from Viselli.

“Please, you know I hate brown-nosers.” Viselli pinched the bridge of his nose and took in a steadying breath. He shook his head. “Both plans down the drain,” he mumbled, more to himself than to Savage. “The girl is still alive and well and Detective Reed is safe and sound in the hospital surrounded by no less than four police officers at all times.”

He paused and Savage took the chance to speak. “I could go in, sir. Four police are no problem.”

Viselli nodded. “You could, but I want to keep things as covert as possible. You’re dismissed for now. Stay close and await further instructions.” Viselli waved his hand to signal the end of the conversation and Savage bowed before ducking out of the room.

Once he was gone, Viselli buried his head in his hands and swore softly to himself. You were alive and well, and now you likely knew that Viselli was after you and your partner personally. Not only that, but your partner was in the hospital instead of in Viselli’s hands, which meant that Viselli had no leverage to use against you. This was all going horribly wrong. As long as his contact within the DPD remained loyal, however, Viselli was confident that he wouldn’t be caught and you’d be taken out of the picture. Yes… everything would work out just fine.

@ghistwrite @rk800downloading @deviantconnorarmy @glitch-girl318 @chichiguitarist123 @into-the-stratosphere @fandomblitch @chocolattaee @projectcherry12 @urban-eagle @padme4000 @datweirdname @josmottt @ipostcoolthingssometimes @ecnelovelamm @assonanceambiance @derpydanandphil @thecrazybluefangirl @pickelope @pokengirl2 @berjhawn @0-why-do-i-exist-0 @fandoms4everyone @cool-haleychapman @trashytwenties @piemeadows @haikyuu-imagines-and-others @layinglonely @peter-maximoff-trash @i-resent-this-hellsite @poodlegods @astridstark13 @havanbcby @hello-i-make-bad-decisions @qtmeryr

#detroit become human fanfiction #red ice #dbh fanfiction #detroit become human #dbh #dbh connor x female reader #detroit become human connor x female reader

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feelingsdusk-writes · 6 years

Text

Worse than worse

Prompted by @ssree: A/B/O world where Bs are a neglected minority (A45/B10/O45), even if they're some of the most important members of society. Because Bs are immune to pheromones. Stiles is a B undercover spy. On a mission, Stiles poses as A/O (with fake pheromones, gotta love the R&D) and gets chosen by A/O Peter, who has issues with normal dynamic stereotypes (O's are airheads, A's are controlfreak douches) and Stiles doesn't set his hackles up like all the others. And Stiles just wants to complete his mission.

Peter is so, so tired right now. He has been for a while, actually. Of society, his family, his circumstances. So. Very. Tired.

The last thing he wanted was to have to attend a ball that will leave him with the same sour taste in his mouth as always in the end. Arrogant alphas, simpering omegas, all of them slaves to their own hormones and pheromones and no better than animals. No amount of alcohol can wash the foul taste that's already building in his mouth, barely one hour in.

Sadly, he had no say in the matter and here he is.

Then he spots him. He doesn't know what makes him pay attention, but he's glad anyways. The man is gorgeous, but that's not what catches his attention. What makes Peter giddy is the way he manipulates the alpha in front of him into snapping so badly that security sweeps in. Then the man feigns being horrified when Peter is sure he's ecstatic. It's beautiful and, since Peter has never been one to abstain from what he wants, he tells him so.

"So beautiful," Peter drawls and then he has to contain a delighted laugh when the man turns, a spark in his eyes that says that he's ready to destroy Peter.

Suddenly, Peter is not tired at all.

---

He called it.

Stiles fucking called it.

Did he say that loud enough for the ones in the back?

No?

HE CALLED IT.

There.

When he eventually gets out, he's going to repeat that until he loses his voice. And then he'll write it down, make copies of it and shove it in their faces. He'll let them keep their copy. Hell, he'll even frame it for them. The remaining copies will be stuck around the office, toilets included.

Because he called it, fuck dammit.

He said the mission was going to be the worst thing ever, and, just as he expected, this mission has turned out to be the worst thing ever. What's worse than the worst thing ever? Is that a thing? It has to be. Because once Stiles had to spend an entire week in the sewers and that was supposed to be the perfect example of the worst thing ever. And yet this is worse. So there must be a term whose definition is "worse than the worst thing ever".

And the mission isn't even over yet.

From bad intel to really bad luck, everything that could go wrong has gone epically wrong. (There's a horse hoof-shaped burn on Stiles' butt that's stinging like crazy, that's how bad the whole thing has gone! A hoof-shaped second degree burn! Stiles will have a hoof tattoo-like mark on his butt for who knows how long, fuck dammit!) Stiles is going to kill the intel and development people, he doesn't care if Danny or Lydia get pissed off for Stiles destroying their respective departments. This shit calls for retribution! The equipment failed, the intel was wrong, they deserve anything Stiles dishes out. Everything went wrong because of them!

Ok, fine, not exactly all. He's already gotten what he needed from his target's computer... even after said computer's OS crashed and nearly caught on fire. Physically. As in flames coming out of... Ok, whatever. Let bygones be bygones and all that shit. Stiles, hoof-shaped second degree burn on his ass cheek or not, needs to chill. He has the data and that's all that matters.

Now, he just has to figure how to send said data to base and then beat it. That would be wonderful. But, of fucking course, because this mission is the worst of the worst things ever, something is jamming the signal, which has made him lose contact with his handler and he hasn't been able to transfer it to headquarters. Sadly, that means that he has had to transfer the data to a memory stick (after having to patch the damn thing that was just seconds ago on fire with what he had in his pockets) and now he has to physically carry it outside the building. Which is no good but he'll have to make do.

He's taking a vacation after this.

(After making intel and development pay, that is.)

---

Just... fuck his life, ok?

His partner was able to slip out unnoticed but as he was trying to do the same, security showed up out of nowhere and he had to retreat towards a toilet or risk being caught otherwise. And sadly, an atypical and abrupt increase in security can only mean one thing: the breach has already been found out and they're trying to locate the source.

Maybe Stiles hasn't mentioned this before, but he really, really hates this mission.

(He has.)

(Like at least twenty times over the comms before he found himself alone.)

(After that he's been chanting it in his head.)

It's already been twenty minutes since that happened and he hasn't been able to leave yet, which just adds up to the shit-ton of things that have gone wrong in this operation so far. Right now, his only consolation for all his troubles is that Deaucalion and every single member of his merry band of human waste are going to be drawn out handcuffed in broad daylight when the bosses finally get their hands on the intel Stiles is carrying right now.

But first he has to leave this fucking place, dammit.

Which, again, brings him to his current situation, in which he's stuck in a ballroom, trying to make an alpha completely lose his shit out of sheer irritation and enjoying every second of it despite the dire circumstances. Now, Stiles would normally try to curve his vindictiveness when he's posing as an omega, but in his defense this alpha was asking for it. Begging. On his metaphorical knees even.

If there's a word Stiles despises, it's defective, with unnatural or it's various synonyms right after it on the podium. Especially so if they're being used to describe another human being. They get his hackles up and his level of viciousness goes first through the roof and then the stratosphere. Easily.

When he was a teen he would even get violent, but time (and the anger management therapy the State of California, his crying omega mom and disappointed™ alpha dad forced on him) toned down his knee-jerk reaction to those words. Don't get him wrong, his view on the whole thing is still pretty much the same, he has just learned to dish out his response in a much more undetectable and productive way.

Because, by definition of the majority of the population nowadays, Stiles himself is defective and unnatural. Doctors have tests to know it before babies like Stiles are born so that the parents can knowingly decide if they still want to have a Beta child or not. In some parts of the world people like Stiles are sacrificed, in others they have to be terminated before they're even born or face being persecuted and killed along with the parents that dared to defy the law and had them. Never mind that if an Alpha, an Omega and a Beta are examined side by side, physically speaking they are almost identical. The only thing that's different is that Betas can't produce any of the two kinds of pheromones or smell them when they're being emitted. That's it. The rest of their bodies work just fine. They have to eat, drink and sleep to survive just like everyone else. If they are female, they are perfectly able to get pregnant; if they are male, they can impregnate a woman. Just like every Alpha or Omega on the planet.

But again, since Betas lack of the equipment to process pheromones, don't go into a heat or a rut, and lack those instincts associated with them, they are defective. Hell, the very term "beta" is a slur that comes from the programming slang (first version of a program that has the necessary basics for it to run but it's incomplete). Betas may have made it their own, but that doesn't change its origins. That's the kind of world Stiles lives in.

And this asshole Alpha, who apparently also finds Omegas utterly vapid and vexing, has packed more Beta slurs in the twenty minutes Stiles has been there blending in than what he can stomach without popping a vessel if he doesn't answer somehow.

Admittedly, Stiles was running on a short fuse to begin with, but he knows he would have done this anyways because it may provide the necessary distraction to slip out unnoticed.

And no one beats Stiles at being an asshole, so by now he has lost count of the number of times he's had to bite his cheek and mask his glee covering his face coyly with his flute of champagne to avoid giving himself away. Asshole Alpha looks about ready to give in to the temptation of strangling him and it shouldn't be this amusing, but it is. Immensely so, in fact. Especially since Stiles is keeping up the hare-brained and innocent act flawlessly and drawing every single omega in the vicinity into the conversation, thus managing to crowd Asshole Alpha quite effectively.

A small pleasure in a completely shitty situation, that's exactly what this is. Now, if he could just leave somehow... But no, impossible. Security is still at every door and Stiles has no way of getting out without being caught with the memory stick and photographic evidence he has on himself.

Asshole Alpha finally snaps and lets out a threatening growl. Stiles forces himself to back off frightened instead of snickering delightedly, copying the reaction of every Omega around himself down to the distressed whimpers at the (he guesses by the reaction) onslaught of angry pheromones. Two guards swoop in almost immediately and make the man accompany them. He resists the temptation of waving cheekily at him as they drag him out and joins the horrified and appalled whispering left behind instead.

"So beautiful," someone drawls at his back and Stiles bites back an irritated groan before turning around to look at most possibly Asshole Alpha, take two.

His breath catches slightly when he takes in the new Alpha's appearance. Ok, wow. Asshole or not, that's one fine specimen of a man. Like, top model worthy wow. Stiles never thought he'd see anyone other than Tony Stark (who cares if it's a fictional character?) who would do justice to a goatee, but holy shit.

What. He may hate people and the dynamics they're run by, but that doesn't keep him from appreciating eye candy, ok? That's a completely different matter, after all. Also, eye candy or not, Stiles will destroy him anyways if he's a douche. It will even be sweeter, because good looking alphas are the epitome of privilege and the thought of being played by an Omega doesn't even enter the realm of possibilities for them.

"Hi," he chirps sweetly, looking at him through his eyelashes and tilting his head just so. Alpha's smile widens and Stiles fights a smug smirk. He's going to destroy him.

"Hello," Alpha purrs. "My name's Peter."

#prompts #teen wolf fics #my writing #teen wolf #steter

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orbemnews · 3 years

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In Sweden’s Far North, a Space Complex Takes Shape KIRUNA, Sweden — The path to the reindeer herder’s spring home took him across four frozen lakes and countless snowy hilltops. Arriving to a light dusting of snow, the herder, Aslak Allas, switched off his snowmobile, and the overwhelming silence of Sweden’s Arctic settled in. His reindeer, thousands of them, were nowhere to be seen. “They are very scared of noise,” Mr. Allas, explained, pointing to his vehicle. He then motioned toward the distant hills dotted with birch trees, their buds swelling with the warming spring sun. “Now, the noise coming from there, that will be something else,” Mr. Allas sighed. That noise is expected to arrive with a roar next year, when Sweden is scheduled to complete construction of a rocket-launching complex in the frozen lands north of the Arctic Circle and jump into the commercial space race, the first country in Europe to do so. With the crystal-clear air of the Arctic night and a decent telescope, it’s easy to pick out some of the thousands of shoebox-size commercial satellites orbiting the earth. Their numbers are set to explode in the coming decade, powered by the use of light, reusable rockets developed by innovative U.S. companies like Elon Musk’s SpaceX. He and several competitors are planning to send up to 50,000 such satellites into space in coming years, compared with fewer than 3,000 out there now. While the United States, China, Russia and several other countries already have spaceports, Sweden’s would be the first orbital launch site for satellites in Europe — capable of launching spacecraft into orbit around Earth or on interplanetary trajectories. Currently, the intergovernmental European Space Agency launches its traditional single-use Ariane rockets from French Guiana. Several private European companies are designing spaceports in Europe to host a new generation of smaller rockets. Portugal is looking into building one on the Azores Islands, two remote sites have been allocated in Britain and Norway is upgrading its Andoya Space Center. But none are as far along as Sweden, which is transforming an old Arctic space research center into a complex featuring several new pads for orbital launches and landings. The Esrange Space Center will be a testing ground for Europe’s first reusable vertical rocket in 2022, and it can conduct engine tests as well. In 1972, the Swedish government took over the base from the European Space Agency, which no longer needed it. For decades, the Swedes hired out the site for smaller, slower research rockets, satellite ground-control services and the launching of stratospheric balloons. But with the commercial space race promising new revenue, the government-owned Swedish Space Corporation, which manages the site, is offering launch services to private ventures wishing to send satellites into space. “We are a bit of a unicorn in the space business,” said Philip Pahlsson, vice president for strategy and innovation of the Swedish Space Corporation, referring to the government ownership of the site. “But we do plan on being the awesomest company in the government’s portfolio.” Esrange shares a landing zone that is more than 2,000 square miles — more than twice the size of Rhode Island — with a local population of mostly bears, wolves, reindeer and a handful of herders like Mr. Allas. If a launch should fail, it would be highly unlikely to cause any damage to human settlements. For certain satellites — those launched into polar orbits — an Arctic location offers key advantages. These orbits, passing over the North and South Poles, are ideal for Earth-observing satellites, because as the Earth rotates, the entire surface of the planet passes underneath. And it takes less energy to launch to a polar orbit from higher latitudes. With the space market growing fast, the Europeans increasingly need launching sites for smaller rockets carrying smaller satellites, experts say. “Europe really needs to build infrastructure to get to space,” said Stefan Gustafsson, a senior vice president at the Swedish Space Corporation, in an interview at its Stockholm headquarters. “We can provide a proper space base.” That base lies close to Kiruna, Sweden’s northernmost city and home to the largest underground iron ore mine in the world. It is so huge, in fact, that several neighborhoods are being moved, as the city is slowly sinking into the excavated caverns below. A 50-foot rocket stands at one of the main intersections, a testament to Sweden’s space ambitions. Space is woven into the fabric of the city. The Swedish Institute of Space Physics is based in Kiruna, as is the Space High School for gifted teenagers. The space engineering program at Lulea University of Technology, also in Kiruna, attracts Ph.D. students from across Europe. An enormous satellite receiver dish, sticking out from the woods in a vast white valley, serves as a geographical landmark. Esrange has many of the attributes of other space ports — high fences and warning signs, and some used rockets on display. But it also has a church, a visitor center and the Aurora hotel, named for the northern lights that color the winter skies. Snow is everywhere, of course, and reindeer roam the terrain (no one knows how they get past the fences), but astronauts and moon landers are nowhere to be found. Leading a tour of the grounds, Mr. Pahlsson became slightly agitated when a photographer began snapping pictures. “We have contracts,” he said. “Some of our customers don’t like their equipment to be photographed.” The launchpads for the orbital rockets, mostly piles of construction equipment and materials at this point, are rising four miles from the central site. Pointing at a pile of sand during a tour of the grounds, Mr. Pahlsson said this was the site of their future “launch-vehicle integration building.” By the end of next year, he said, they hoped to use the launch site to test Europe’s first reusable rocket, called Themis, after an ancient Greek Titaness who was the personification of divine order. On this day, the main activity consisted of engine testing by two fiercely competitive German space start-ups, Rocket Factory Augsburg and ISAR Aerospace Technologies. “You can actually call me a rocket scientist,” said Josef Fleischmann, 30, one of three founders of ISAR. In 2017, he and fellow students won an award by building the fastest pod in Elon Musk’s competition for ultra-high-speed transport in hyperloop, or travel in a vacuum tube. That caught the attention of Bulent Altan, a former vice president at Space X, who decided to back Mr. Fleischmann and his friends. “Now, we have $100 million in investments and we are building rockets.” “The location seems remote, but for space this is the place to be,” said Rene Laufer, a professor of space technology at Lulea University of Technology. “Also, you don’t want to test rockets in your own backyard.” So far, Esrange has not elicited criticism from environmentalists, but that could change. Solid rocket fuel can leave a heavy carbon foot print, and liquid fuels pose a threat of toxicity. The exhaust clouds that form after liftoff and during flight are also concerns. Sweden’s space minister, Matilda Ernkrans, in an interview said that she expected the base to play a key role in helping to map global climate change. Back at his modest dwelling, Mr. Allas, the reindeer herder, would second that notion, and he is planning to do something about it, even if his backyard is one of the few not attached one way or another to the space industry. Mr. Allas is more than a man with a snowmobile and lots of reindeer. He is chairman of the Talma sameby, one of the larger Sami districts in Sweden. The Sami are the last Indigenous people of Europe and live in Finland, Sweden, Norway and Russia. In 2019, after an appeal by his district, Mr. Allas managed to block some of the expansion plans for the base, and now his sights are set on the coming noise pollution. “They might say we need to launch or else we lose our customers, but reindeer herding has been around here long as you can imagine,” Mr. Allas said, adding that a legal battle seemed inevitable. “For us, the Space Corporation is the oldest intruder of our lands, but we have much older rights.” Source link Orbem News #complex #North #shape #Space #Swedens #Takes

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everlark-your-own-adventure · 7 years

Text

Powder Keg, Chapter 1

Hey, Fandom! We’re back with the Holiday Edition of Everlark Your Own Adventure! Anyone fancy some love in front of a roaring fire in the middle of a blizzard? What about a good, old fashioned argument-turned kissing frenzy in the snow-covered woods? It can happen, but not without your help! This story will take us right up through New Year’s, so start reblogging and adding your thoughts in the tags today, and check back every Monday through to continue voting whether these two can put their past behind them, or if it’s just not in their favor this round.

Enjoy the first chapter of Powder Keg, written by @peetabreadgirl.

“I’m scared, Katniss! I can’t do it!” Sally cries, clutching onto my ski pants. If she keeps it up, the tears running down her cheeks and the clear goo starting to leak from her nose will freeze before break time.

“It’s okay.” I use my best big sister voice to try and soothe away her fear of skiing on a slope that’s only a little flatter than my chest. “You’re going to do just fine. See that flag there?” I point to the pole that’s halfway down the bunny slope on the edge.

“Uh-huh,” she half-sobs, nodding her head, her fingers flexing in and out, probably trying to get a better hold on me.

“All you have to do is make it there. I’ll be right behind you. Nothing to worry about, yeah?”

She sticks her nose back in my pants and shakes her head vigorously. I check my watch. I’ve been at this for 46 whole minutes. Only 14 left to go. Seemingly, a lifetime of seconds trying to convince a five-year-old that she has nothing to be afraid of, feels like hell. At this rate, I’ll have celebrated seven birthdays before we reach the bottom of the training slope.

Work with me, kiddo, I think, trying not to huff my frustration audibly. Happy parents give good tips.

Speaking of, I wave to Sally’s mother, sitting on the patio of the lodge, watching our progress. Or lack thereof. She’s propped in an Adirondack chair with sunglasses that cover half her face and a perfectly styled bun with just the right touch of messy. Her expensive jacket is only zipped halfway, and even from here I can see a the cleavage from her super-sized breasts.

She doesn’t wave back, clearly not impressed with my skill as a ski instructor. It’s my first time to teach here at Mt. Mockingjay Resort, but I’ve been skiing here all my life. I guess being a good skier doesn’t necessarily translate into being good instructor. I didn’t realize it would be so difficult.

But I’ve got an entire season to go, and it’s just starting to get busy with the holidays right around the corner.

Just as I’m about to pat Sally on the head, I hear a whoosh behind me. Before I can turn around, Peeta Mellark, my childhood-crush-turned-enemy stops in front of me and releases the bindings on his snowboard, stepping out of it.

“I’ve got this, Peeta,” I tell him, trying to keep the irritation out of my voice in front of Sally. I know what he’s about to do. Thinks he’s God’s gift to females of any age.

He ignores me, eyes on the little blonde girl who could pose as his offspring. She might be, considering the rumors that he receives tips from his students in the form of blow jobs and other activities in the bathroom. Ugh. That was harsh and those rumors probably aren’t true, but Peeta does get the most requests for private lessons of any of the mountain’s ski instructors. Mostly women. I guess he’s not completely unfortunate looking. Sort of classically handsome.

I cross my arms over my chest as he starts speaking to my lesson in a tone that’s both soft and fun, something I can’t seem to master no matter how hard I try.

“What’s your name?” he asks.

Sally looks up, connecting her blue gaze to his. The smile that lights up his face makes her keep her focus on him instead of burying her face back into my clothing. I notice a giant wet spot on my upper thigh. Thank goodness for waterproof gear.

“Sally,” she manages through a few sniffles. She wipes her nose with a gloved hand.

“Sally, I’m Peeta. It’s nice to meet you.” He pulls off his glove and holds his hand out to shake hers. “Are you having some trouble getting down the mountain?”

“Mhm,” she nods, turning her body towards him. Her skis move a little, sending her off balance. Her eyes widen in fear but Peeta catches her by the arm and steadies her.

“Here’s what we’re gonna do, Sally,” he says, like she’s just going to go along with it. I cock my hip, waiting for the outburst that’s sure to turn this crappy day into a win for me.

“I’m gonna hold your hand and walk right beside you all the way down, and then when we get to the bottom, we’re going to go inside that building right there,” he points to the ski lodge, sounding as excited as kid on Christmas morning, “and get the best tasting hot chocolate on Mt. Mockingjay. What do you say?”

Sally looks from him to the lodge, then back. I know I shouldn’t relish a child being scared, but right now, if it will put Peeta in his place, which happens to be out of my stratosphere, I’m rooting for a tantrum.

“Okay,” Sally says to him, wiping the remnants of her tears away. I would choke on my own spit if the air weren’t so dry when Peeta’s face breaks into the smile seen round the world, it’s so bright. Damn. People in China are waking up wondering what the hell happened to the moon.

“Um, you know what Sally, I can do that with you, okay? We can let Peeta get back to…” Whatever he was doing. Or whomever.

“No, I want Peeta,” Sally says, letting go of me all together and launching herself at him. Traitor. She’s known me for 46 minutes and him all of 46 seconds. I stare daggers at him as he sets her skis at the right angle and adjusts the strap that keeps the tips from sliding too far apart.

If I weren’t so dumbfounded at Sally’s change in attitude, I would forbid him to take her from me. Before I can utter a syllable, he starts down the slope with Sally in tow, making a game out of it. I finally snap out of the shock and push my poles into the ground, shoving off in their direction, seething.

When we reach Sally’s mother, Glimmer, she gives her mom a huge hug. “I did it, Mommy! Did you see? Did you see?” the little girl cries excitedly.

“I did!” Glimmer responds, looking up to Peeta. His shades make him look like an aviator pilot. She practically purrs like a cat in heat. “Thank you so much, Peeta.” Her hand goes to his bicep. Of course it does. That’s not obvious at all.

“I thought Katherine would never get her off that slope.”

“It’s Katniss,” I correct her with barely concealed irritation. She doesn’t even look at me. Neither does Peeta or Sally. It’s like I don’t exist. My seething is turning to a rapidly boiling rage. If Glimmer leaves a tip, he’s not getting it. I wasn’t even finished before he came waltzing in to play the unnecessary hero. “I’m sure Sally would have gotten down just fine if I’d been given a few more minutes to convince her she could do it.”

Peeta’s eyes snag mine and I see the warning there. Glimmer Abernathy is the richest ski bunny on Mt. Mockingjay. Her husband practically keeps these lifts open with how much money she spends here every year.

“Mommy, Mommy!” Sally says excitedly. Glimmer finally looks down at her daughter, her hand still on Peeta’s arm. “Peeta said we could get hot chocolate if I got down!”

“Did he now?” Glimmer looks back up at Peeta with a coy smile.

“It’s my treat,” Peeta tells her, showing off his dazzling smile and perfect teeth.

“Oh, I wouldn’t dream of it,” she gasps, smashing her free hand against her chest, pushing her ample cleaving damn near up to her chin. I want to barf. “I’ll buy if you let me come.” The twinkle in her makes me wonder if that’s a double entendre. I’d rather not stick around to find out, but this show ain’t over yet.

“Sally hasn’t finished her lesson, yet,” I remind them. If the lesson doesn’t get completed, I have to forfeit the whole hour’s pay.

“I think we’re all done.” The way Glimmer says it makes it seem like I won’t have any repeat business from her. “Thank you for your time, Kennedy.”

The three of them turn and walk across the deck, into the revolving door of the lodge, leaving me gaping at the backs of their ski-cap covered blonde heads. Kennedy? It’s not even close to Katherine!

I don’t have another lesson until the afternoon, so I huff and puff all the way back to the offices, almost slinging my skis into my locker. I’m so mad I barely register the other bodies in the room.

“Sorry, Everdeen.” Johanna Mason, my boss, says following it up with a low whistle. “It wasn’t my first choice.” If there’s a skier equal to my talent, it would be Jo, but an unfortunate accident blew out her knee and now she has to sit on the sidelines, scheduling us all over the mountain while she keeps warm inside. It sucks big time, and while we’re not super close, we’re better friends than when we were competing against each other in high school. I was a freshman giving her, a senior, a run for her reputation as the fiercest chick on the blacks.

I growl and grind my teeth together before answering. “You knew?.” I turn to face her, hands settling on my hips in challenge, ready to defend my earnings. “I didn’t get to finish the lesson. I was 14 minutes away, Jo! I shouldn’t be docked if he physically skis away with the kid.”

“I wish I could pay you,” she starts with a sincerity that’s usually not like her, “but when I made rounds earlier Glimmer caught me and requested that Peeta finish the lesson. I tried to convince her to let you have the full hour, and then we could switch instructors if she still wasn’t happy, but she complained that her hard-earned money was being wasted.”

I snorted. Hard earned money, my ass. She married a paunchy, balding drunk that made a fortune from a lucky investment in bitcoin.

“Keep it to yourself,” Jo stops me before I can say it out loud, probably not wanting it to get out what most of us think about her, flicking her gaze to Bristel and Gale, two other instructors this year. Bristel’s a boarder like Peeta, and Gale a skier like me, though he couldn’t beat me down from the top of the bowl if one my legs was broken.

“Look, Everdeen, I know it’s a tough situation, but the policies are what they are and we have to keep our best customers happy. And the fact of the matter is, you couldn’t get the kid to do what she needed to do, and Peeta can.”

I let out a deep breath and pinch the bridge of my nose, trying to let it go. As one of the ‘best’ customers of the lodge over the last five years, Glimmer gets what Glimmer wants. And she always chooses Peeta. He’s been her instructor since he started at the resort 3 years ago.

Another piece of gossip I picked up in the locker room.

“At least I have my afternoon lesson,” I say to myself.

“Actually,” Jo starts, and I feel my heart squeeze inside my chest. “They canceled. Kid has a cold or something.”

“So I get nothing at all today?” I shriek, lifting my hands in disbelief.

“You can clock into the snack bar and get a couple hours in,” she offers.

“That’s minimum wage!” I cry, my hands pounding my thighs they fall so hard. I spin and bang my forehead against the locker.

“It’s better than no money at all,” she shrugs.

She’s right, but I don’t want to admit it. I strip my outer gear off and toss it in my locker, slamming the metal door shut, and take off for the cafeteria. If this keeps up I’ll have to work the snack bar through the summer to make the money I need. In lesson tips alone I would quadruple the pay I’ll be getting working hourly here at the lodge, not including the $25 an hour I acquire for teaching.

I’m fiddling with the soda machine, trying to figure out how to adjust the carbonation setting on the Dr. Pepper when someone taps me on the shoulder. I whirl, coming face to face with Peeta. He looks… nervous. My earlier irritation isn’t as pronounced now that I know he was forced to retrieve Sally, but I’m not used to being second best to anyone, and it kinda blows.

“Hey, Katniss, look - I’m sorry about earlier.” He unzips one of his pants pockets and pulls out a wad of cash. “It was unfair what Glimmer did to you, and I want to be sure you get paid. I was watching you with Sally, and,” he swallows as my suspicious gaze narrows at the bills, “she’s a real handful. Not your fault.”

My instincts say to reject it. What he did years ago comes rushing back, slapping me with reality. I can’t take his money. It would be like forgiving him for that.

But I really need it. My old Jeep needs four new tires and my mom just lost her job. Not to mention Christmas is in six short weeks. Mom could use the income to help buy Prim some presents, but I don’t want to take his pity money. It’s not like I can’t do the job. I’m the best skier here. I’ll have more opportunities, right?

But what if I don’t? What if more lessons cancel and more parents aren’t satisfied? I hate to think what a dismal season I’ll have if I get only a few lessons assigned to me and no requests.

Help me! Do I take the money, or do I tell him to shove it up his ass?

#everlark-your-own adventure #powder keg #peeta #katniss #ski instructors #holiday edition #2017 #vote!#peetabreadgirl #xerxia31 #burkygirl #we're at it again

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