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marvel-sluts · 4 years

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Christmas with the avengers

pairing: avengers x teen!reader, Peter Parker x reader.

warnings: maybe some swearing?

summary: your first Christmas with both the avengers and with Peter, what could possibly go wrong?

a/n: merry Christmas everyone! this is absolute shit but I wanted to write something Christmassy, I hope you all like it!

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you hadn't been part of the avengers long when you started dating Peter, causing this to be your first Christmas with the both of them.

you get dressed in the matching Christmas jumpers you and Peter both had, because apparently it was tradition in the avengers tower to wear Christmas jumpers on Christmas day, so you had both agreed to wear the matching jumpers. (see gif)

you pulled on a pair of jeans and tied your hair up in a ponytail, with a small peice tinsel wrapped around your hairband. you did light makeup with f/c (fave colour) of eyeshadow.

you walk out of your room in the avengers tower and bump into Thor and Loki, heading to the kitchen.

"hello lady y/n, you look ravishing. I love your jumper." Thor said smiling at you.

"thanks Thor, you look good too." you say smiling at him.

"I like the tinsel" Loki muttered to you on the way past. you and him had become quite close over the past few months you have spent at the tower, but it still shocked you that he would say something like that with Thor around. normally he was a lot quieter in the shadow of his older brother.

"thanks loki." you say cheerfully, getting into the lift with them.

when the three of you get to the living room and kitchen you go your separate ways. Thor to the kitchen, no doubt to raid the cupboards of poptarts and you and Loki to the living room. you take a seat next to your boyfriend and smile at him.

"you look amazing" Peter says, looking at you lovingly.

"so do you." you say giggling.

"I know" he said, pretending to do a hair flick. but failing miserably and accidentally hitting himself in the face.

you laugh at him, and he looks at you with those puppy dog eyes that you can never resist. "sorry love" you say before kissing his cheek where he hit himself.

both of you head to the kitchen and after collectively deciding on cereal for breakfast, you go back into the living room with bowls full.

just as you both sat down on the sofa at your previous spots, Tony came in with Morgan trailing behind him, also wearing matching Christmas jumpers. "Merry Christmas everyone!" he says, sitting next to Steve and Bucky on the sofa.

Morgan runs over to you and attemps to scramble onto your lap. after realising what she was trying to do you help her get up and she sits on you happily.

Morgan had begun to like you in the short time you had been here, you were good with kids and would often play with her causing you two to become immediate friends. she was your little partner in crime and the pair of you would often adopt Loki to help prank Tony and Steve.

"I know its Christmas but there is a lot to get done, Pepper, Wanda and Bucky are on cooking duty first and then we will rotate, check this peice of paper that was kindly provided by Bruce for the timetable. everything else should have been done already."

"I can't wait to see what I got from Santa!" Morgan squealed excitedly, eyeing the pile of presents under the tree.

"I'm offended" you say dramatically, "are you not exited to see what I got you?" you asked laughing.

"yep, I'm exited for all the presents!" she said before getting off of your lap and running into the kitchen to 'help' with the cooking.

after half an hour of chatting and crimes cookies Nat decided she was bored.

"who wants to play Christmas games?" she shouts holding up a box. you glance at the box before bursting out laughing.

"o-deer! really?" Sam said, laughing at what happened last time you played it.

"do you remember Rhodes last time, he looked like he was going to take off." Scott said laughing.

"erm, excuse me. but who won?" Rhodes said pointing to himself. "this guy, so don't get ahead of yourselves." he said.

"I personally think I'm gonna win this time" you say sticking your tongue out at Rhodes.

"not gonna happen doll" Bucky called from the kitchen.

"just watch me win" you say.

everyone comes in from the kitchen and takes a break from cooking to play.

you all take turns having the antlers and throwing the hoops, when both you and Peter had finished you both collapsed on the sofa. he put his arm around you and you nestled your face in his chest, breathing in his warm sent.

after Nat announced that the winner was Wanda (everyone thinks she used her powers, although she swears that she didn't) you changed around kitchen duty, next up it was you, Peter and Steve.

Vision had mysteriously disappeared from the cooking rota, despite the fact that Wanda had been helping his cooking skills he couldn't seem to get any better.

you got started on the brussel sprouts, how anyone could eat them was beyond you but apparently some people *cough* Sam *cough* liked them.

Peter had gotten started on the stuffing, making the mixture and rolling it into balls. whenever he would walk past u he would kiss you on the forehead, or whatever part of you that was facing him at the time. Steve was watching this behaviour and wasn't sure to find it cute or disgusting.

Steve was getting busy with the mashed potatoes and checking on the turkey every once in a while.

a gasp echoed through the kitchen as you burnt your hand on the oven attempting to check on the turkey per Steve's request.

"what happe-" pete asked trailing off when he say u nursing your hurt hand, "oh baby, are you okay? did you burn it? don't worry it will be okay. I'll get some ice for it" he said, completely freaking out.

you watching him frantically searching for some ice for a minute before saying "don't worry petey, it's fine. it's only a burn. and it doesn't hurt that badly" you say giggling at how concerned he was.

"but what if it gets infected? or if it swells up?" he asked finally managing to find some ice and putting it on your hand.

"honestly, you kids." Steve says rolling his eyes and chuckling. "are you sure you are alright y/n?" he asks, his eyebrows knitting in concern.

"yeah I'm sure" you say, smiling up at him.

"okay" he says checking on the turkey himself.

you checked the clock "our shift ended five minutes ago! those little fuckers didn't tell us!" you say taking off the apron. you go into the living room and find Morgan and Loki laughing on the sofa.

"I'm truly sorry Lady y/n, it was my shift next and I didn't want to do it." Loki said, smirking at you.

"your not sorry" you say.

"no, your right, I'm not" he said, grinning again.

you roll your eyes and resume your earlier position on the sofa, Peter sitting next to you.

"secret santa!" came a shout from the doorway, you looked up to see that it was Tony. he was carrying the secret santa presents in his arms and Clint and Rhodes were behind him also carrying armfuls of presents.

Morgan jumped up from her seat next to Bruce squealing excitedly.

"don't we have to wait for our special guests to get here?" Pepper asked eyeing Tony.

"oops I forgot, yes we do" Tony said putting down the presents bashfully.

"what special guests?" you ask, having not heard about this at all.

"you will see" Tony said, with a shit eating grin.

about ten minutes later a knock was heard at the door.

Vision gets up to answer it and you soon here a shout from the doorway.

"do not fear, Christmas is saved. for the overrated king of wakanda and his amazing and beautiful genuis sister is here!"

"SHURI!" you and Peter both yell in unison.

"it is I" she said flicking her hair (and actually succeeding) before running to hug the two of you.

"not that anyone has noticed but I'm also here" Doctor Strange says from the doorway.

Tony and Bruce look up from talking to T'Challa and go over to shake hands with Strange.

"presents now?" Morgan asks, tugging on Tony's trouser leg.

"yes sweetie, go over and open some of them." Tony says. patting her on her head and sending her on her way.

everyone gathers around the tree and watches Morgan open her presents from santa. when she has finished you give her a wrapped package with some art supplies in. she jumps up and hugs you with a massive grin on her face.

then someone (you guess Scott but your not sure) yells secret santa.

everyone gets the presents they had gotten for their secret santa, you had gotten Thor and after asking for help from Peter you ended up making him something. when it was time for you to give thor his present you presented a wrapped up package. it was a knitted jumper with tiny hammers and lightning bolts on it.

he opened the present with a massive grin on his face and pulled you into a bone crushing hug.

"thanks you Lady y/n, I couldn't have asked for anything better."

"your welcome Thor" you said, smiling up at him.

when everyone was done with the secret santa, you had received a few scented bath bombs and a silver snake ring from Natasha, some people trickled out to go and help in the kitchen.

you handed Peter a package wrapped in red paper, "here you go Petey" you say.

he takes it and opens it, you had given him a watch with the millennium falcon on the inside of it.

"thanks baby, I love it!" he says hugging you tightly and kissing you square on the lips. "you will get yours tonight" he says with a grin.

not even five minutes had passed when a yell was heard from the kitchen.

"you idiot, you were meant to take out the turkey while we were opening the presents!" Sam yelled.

"well its not my fault that the timer didn't go off!" Clint yelled back.

"FRIDAY, did you set the timer like I asked you to?" Sam asked.

"you never asked me to set a timer sir" FRIDAY replied.

"shit" Sam muttered kicking the table in frustration.

after a few minutes of chaos Steve managed to find a ham in the back of the fridge, everyone decided that the ham was the best thing to have so you cooked it up and it didn't get burnt.

everyone gathered around the table, the food was delicious, and you almost couldn't tell that there wasn't a turkey.

"hey Bucky, could you pass me the potatoes please?" you asked. piling your plate high with good food.

once everyone was done eating you all sat in the living room and put on a Christmas movie.

you and Peter wanted to watch the muppets Christmas Carol but you both were outvoted and you ended up watching the Nightmare before Christmas.

Tony got the movie set up and you curled into Peter. an hour later when the movie was finished you were still in the same position, you were very happy next to Peter with him stroking your hair lovingly. you buried your head further into his chest until you had to upstairs to bed.

Peter offered to carry you and you glad fully accepted, completely worn out from the chaos filled day.

when you had both gotten up to your bedroom he presented a wrapped up gift from his pocket.

"I'm not done with you yet y/n" he says with a grin on his face.

you open the package and inside find a box. upon opening it you find a beautiful silver heart locket. you open up the locket to find that Peter had already put a picture inside, it was a picture of you and him on Valentines day, on the date that he had set up for the two of you.

"omg, Pete I absolutely love it!" you say with a massive grin on your face, "can you put it on me?" you ask.

"turn around" he says, taking the necklace from you and clasping it up. "all done"

he spins you around and you land in his arms, he kisses you passionately and you kiss back just as fiercely. the kiss was filled with passion and promises.

that night you fall asleep in his arms, with a massive grin on your face.

you couldn't have wished for a better Christmas, even if it did include burnt turkey.

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swga-ficrecs · 3 years

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june 2021 recap

ahh june was a really fic-filled month!!! i used to be a silent reader but then i realized that it’s hard to go back to the fics i really liked reading since i had no way of finding them except for remembering key words and googling the shit out of it lol so!!! i thought of doing a monthly recap of all my favorites in addition to the fics i like and reblog. thank you to these wonderful authors who just write pure magic ✨

🏆 holy grail | ☀️ fluff | 🌧 angst | 💋 smut.

fave authors

🏆 @minyoongijjangjjangmanboongboong

HOLY GRAIL AUTHOR!!! Loved a lot of their series because of the tropes and the plot. I’ll definitely come back to their fics in the future for another binge reading session

@taecalikook

Really loved their fuckboy trope fics. Has a few unfinished fics I’m excited to binge read once they’re completed

🏆 @gukyi

Discovered their work back in 2017? Really loved IGYMH and reread their masterlist this month

@ve1vetyoongi

All I can remember is the ending of Mic Drop and I can’t 😭 I’m really excited for their unfinished fics!!!!

fave fics

Arranged by @.minyoongijjangjjangmanboongboong 🏆 ☀️ 🌧

Pairing: chaebol MYG x student reader

Y/N is a struggling student in Seoul: working multiple jobs, living in a broom closet apartment, and often sacrificing her dignity for the sake of her livelihood. What happens when a handsome stranger presents her with an offer she cannot refuse at the moment she needs it most?

Dissonance by @.minyoongijjangjjangmanboongboong 🏆 🌧 ☀️

Pairing: bassist KTH x student / band manager reader

The Parting by @.minyoongijjangjjangmanboongboong 🏆 🌧 ☀️

Pairing: flower shop owner PJM x reaper reader

The only certainty in life is death, and it seems to follow Park Jimin. All his life, the icy shadow of death has hung closely by his side, along with the shadow of…something else. Reapers exist to guide the souls of the living to the world beyond. But what happens when a particular Reaper tampers with the natural order and saves a mortal boy’s life? What will they do once their fates become inextricably linked?

From Home by @gyukult 🏆 ☀️ 🌧

Pairing: chaebol JJK x reader

jungkook is the youngest of five boys, the last in line to truly inherit any his parents’ money. but what if his mom suddenly cuts him off due to his current poor behavior and he’s forced to learn how it feels like to be part of the working class?

(Not) Just Friends by @.taecalikook 🏆 ☀️ 🌧

Pairing: Bestfriend / fuckboy / fratboy JJK x reader ft. KSJ

Befriending the fuckboy with devilishly handsome face and emotional capacity of a pea is not your choice, especially when you met him when you were in fifth grade, attracted for the unhealthy vermilion shaded face of the nerd he was that fateful day. So was Jungkook, as he is already putting strictly platonic label on your forehead and calls it a day. But it is only a matter of time before everything changes, and it only takes a frat party, lots of booze and… a certain Kim Seokjin.

Partiality by @jiminimoon 🏆 🌧

Pairing: Husband PJM x reader

You and Jimin argue about your kids not loving you two equally

Brown-eyed Baby by @jeonstudios 🏆 ☀️ 🌧 💋

Pairing: Single Parent JJK x reader

a lost child at the mall. eyes from a different time.

I’ll Give You My Heart by @.gukyi 🏆 ☀️ 🌧

Pairing: CEO bestfriend MYG x reader

gift exchanges are cool. gift exchanges with your ceo-slash-best friend min yoongi are less cool, because what the hell are you supposed to get the man that already has everything?

The Truth Between Us by @.gukyi and @jimlingss 🏆 ☀️ 🌧

Pairing: Editor MYG x reader

a book deal should be the most exciting time of your life, but there seems to be a constant and omnipresent damper on your mood in the form of a certain min yoongi, who you would just cut out from your life, if he weren’t your editor. but then, the world shifts beneath your feet, and you begin to wonder if maybe you’ve always been looking at life from the wrong angle.

Love is Blind by @cinnaminsvga 🏆 ☀️ 🌧

[Final] Pairing: Fake boyfriend KNJ x reader

social media au where y/n posts a fake boyfriend application on twitter as a dare but ends up seeking something real in the long run (aka how to fall in love the zillennial way)

Love Grows Where You Go by @hueseok 🏆 ☀️ 🌧

Pairing: Fiancé MYG x reader

determined to make you and yoongi grow closer for your upcoming wedding in two weeks, your parents plan a trip for the both of you that lasts five days long. you know you should be ecstatic about it, considering your longtime crush on your fiancé, but by how you’re positive that he secretly despises your whole being, you don’t find this mini vacation with him something to look forward to. that is until things take an unexpected turn and suddenly, he makes it apparent he doesn’t hate you at all as you reckoned.

Give Me Love by @.hueseok 🏆 ☀️ 🌧

Pairing: Lawyer boyfriend KNJ x reader

you’ve been in a relationship with your boyfriend for over five years now, yet the talk of marriage has never been initiated between the two of you. of course, you try to somehow squeeze it in from time to time, but it seems like no matter what, namjoon just won’t take the hint

Cornfields and Cosmos by @jessikahathaway ☀️ 🌧 💋

Pairing: Alien MYG x reader

Cornfields: He was an alien. You were a girl. Can I make it any more obvious? Probably. It’s the one where Yoongi’s a cold alien that needs love too.

Cosmos: Yoongi and you had been travelling together for a long time. You’d begun the terrifying journey of becoming parents. When a new person arrives in a way you didn’t expect, you and Yoongi’s relationship is sent into a tailspin.

The Art of Craving by @venusiangguk ☀️ 💋

Pairing: Single parent DILF JJK x reader

jk takes you to a bbq at his friends house. the tri-tip is good but the creampie is even better.

fics to i’m waiting to finish before binge reading

What we are not ; Soulmates by @.taecalikook

Pairing: MYG x reader x KTH

you love yoongi with all your heart throughout these five years being in a relationship with him. you always thought he is the one — your one, even when the infamous soulmate signs are still not showing. yet you always wait, because you know it’s him you are destined to be with, forever. but what would happen if then his childhood best friend comes along, with the universe-signed telltales that you have been looking for true love in all the wrong places?

When the sea sleeps by @.taecalikook

Pairing: KSJ x reader

marriage should be based on love, but it’s not really the case with you and Seokjin. what’s more beneficial than two person who sworn off romances to get married out of obligation, right? but you should have known better, that keeping your heart straight from wanting someone like Kim Seokjin is next to impossible.

After Midnight by @.gyukult

Pairing: JJK x reader

jeon jungkook only likes seeing you after midnight.

Better With You by @ve1vetyoongi

Pairing: KSJ x reader

A part time job as a chef at Paradise Resort seems like the perfect way to spend your summer and save up some spare cash to open your own restaurant back home. That is until you cross paths with the CEO’s son who threatens to fire you if you don’t help him inherit his trust-fund-baby-fortune. How? By making you his fiancé. Well, his pretend fiancé at least.

Operation: Love Letters by @.ve1vetyoongi

Pairing: OT7 x reader

When every student on campus is going crazy about a survey that claims to make true love bloom, your best friend manages to convince you to join in on the fun — except you’re disappointed to find out that your results just seem to be lost causes. That is until a love letter from a mysterious secret admirer turns up and you find yourself on a mission to find the person behind the pen — but you quickly realise it’s going to be a lot harder than you initially thought when you have 7 possible bachelors to investigate, right? Operation: Love Letters a-go!

Remember Me by @.ve1vetyoongi

Pairing: OT7 x reader

Taehyung wants to be forgotten. Overwhelmed by his life as idol persona V, he longs to just be Kim Taehyung for once. Even if that means forgetting everything he ever knew

🏆 The Prince and His Rose by @vanaera

Pairing: Football player / Childhood bestfriend JJK x reader

Drabble series of “For a While”

The Heart Holiday by @.vanaera

Pairing: MYG x reader

Valentine’s Day is declared as an official holiday. However, private companies’ standards dictate it’s only for the people who are currently in a relationship. Unluckily for Y/N, she doesn’t have this year’s PRS’ (Proof of Relationship Status) “in a relationship” box ticked – the only ticket out she can have to enjoy one paid week of holiday leave away from her hellish job. And more unfortunately for Y/N, everyone around her is oh so conveniently currently committed in a relationship. Except for one person: Min Yoongi, Y/N’s biggest critic in every pitch meeting, the picky guy who always picks on her, and the most annoying jerk of the century. Desperate for that holiday leave, Y/N strikes Yoongi up with an offer: Fake date each other two weeks before February 14, just enough time for the Department of Relationship Management (DRM) to consider processing their PRSs. After Valentine’s Day, they will go back to their own ways and never speak about whatever that may happen during the plan. Good, plain, and simple. That is until, Yoongi uncharacteristically oh so enthusiastically agrees to Y/N’s offer, leaving her thinking that she may have bitten something too much more than she can chew.

My Time by @.vanaera

Pairing: JJK x reader

A future technology allows cops to jump in the past and future to investigate crimes that have happened and prepare for those that are about to happen. A simple hit-and-run turns into something more when Captain Jeon Jungkook finds himself as the victim of a culprit who cannot be identified by the system. Especially when the culprit seems to be the same person behind the new case that’s threatening the order in the justice organization. All goes haywire when Jungkook gets involved with Y/N L/N, the clairvoyant sketch artist who may be his only help to solve the case.

Lost Stars by @.hueseok

Pairing: JJK x reader

the last person you’d expect to be there for you is your roommate, jeongguk, on the night you break up with your cheating boyfriend; because as far as you’re concerned, the both of you aren’t exactly friends, and he definitely shouldn’t be running to get you upon hearing you sob via phone call.

so when he does, you begin thinking that maybe you’ve just been hard on him over the years, or perhaps he just liked pretending to be an annoying shit most of the time. either way, it becomes the beginning of an unexpected friendship finally blossoming.

Dexterity + Stupidity by @.hueseok

Pairing: JJK x reader

a drabble series that features surgical intern!jeongguk x surgical resident!reader as they go through their odd senior-junior relationship, obviously having the hots for each other and yet, frustratingly goes into twists and turns in order to properly act on it.

Crimson Grail by @.jessikahathaway

Pairing: MYG x reader

There were tales of the famed pirate Min Yoongi, Captain of the Crimson Grail. However, one meeting with him is hardly ever enough… One taste of adventure, and you were addicted.

Baby Talk by @.jessikahathaway

Pairing: PJM x JJK x reader

Jimin and Jungkook had been trying to get a surrogate for years. Finally when you agree to help them, their dreams seem to be coming true. But, dreams change…

Vegas, Baby by @.jessikahathaway

Pairing: KTH x reader

They say what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. What happens when there’s a little more legality to it than that?

Taming the Beast by @.jessikahathaway

Pairing: KTH x reader

You were the next in line to be the head of your village, when your mother gave you to the enemy to save your people from merciless slaughter. What happens when they try to Tame a Beast?

Owner by @.jessikahathaway

Pairing: JJK x reader

With your mother hounding on you (no pun intended), you decided to get a little help from a hybrid, who was also in need of assistance.

If Only You Knew by @agustdakasuga

Pairing: BTS x reader

From the start, you knew you wanted to be a hybrid rehabilitator. You needed to help these hybrids heal, learn to live with one another and lead normal lives. Even if they are all different, you hoped that they could give each other a new reason to live.

#monthly recap #bts fics #bts jungkook #bts jin #bts seokjin #bts yoongi #bts suga #bts rm #bts namjoon #bts jimin #bts v #bts taehyung #bts fic recs #bts fanfic

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jq37 · 3 years

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Maybe I'm also being animal racist, but a current guess I have for oMaM is that the rabbit Sly saw at the docks was actually the newspaper photographer who seems to be spending a lot of energy documenting Sly's movements at this party, and the bad lighting/state of intoxicated introspection led Syl to make a wrong assumption. (Also did you ever watch Hoodwinked? Spoilers: the reporter bunny did it)

lol hey guys. So I've been fairly MIA the past couple of weeks due to my job trying to actively murder me but I wanted to pop in for a hot second to talk about where we are theory-wise at this point in the season.

First of all, to address the actual ask, I feel like Brennan must have known Longfoot would be suspicious due to ~animal racism~ and put him in as a red herring and now we have even more info to back that up.

I suspect that what's going on with the stuff in the manor is a version of the Pepper's ghost illusion which involves mirrors to do ghostly projections and look pretty darn good for an effect that was invented hundreds of years ago. If you've ever ridden Haunted Mansion at Disney, that's the effect they use to do the waltzing ghosts (fun fact, because the effect mirrors the objects it's used on and the Imagineers forgot to take that into account, all of the female ghosts are leading in the dance!) But that's just fluff, let's talk plot.

So last week's ep threw a LOT of suspicion on Sly with him literally being painted at the villain and Grant doing absolutely nothing to defend himself. And, I'll admit, it would be pretty delicious to not only have Sly foreshadow it earlier with his coy, "Why yes, it also could have been me," and also that Grant himself would have [REDACTED] Rekha a SECOND TIME (watch the Murder Mystery ep of Game Changers if you don't know what I mean--it's my fave ep). But I talked it over with my watch buddy @camwritery and I don't think Sly is actually a baddie. I think this is a double double cross (Lol a cross from Mr. Cross). Here's my thought process.

(1) Yes there's that stack of letters Daisy found in Sly's hand but those easily could have been forged. I'd like Buck to take a look at those since he has that rogue handwriting checking ability.

(2) Squire Badger specially said something was coming to F Sly up and Sly could tell he wasn't the mastermind. Fletcher would make the most sense as to who the mastermind actually is. Like, it wouldn't be so much a twist to the audience but it would be a big ass twist to the CHARACTERS who thought he was fully dead (for the most part) and I feel like that matters more than "subverting expectations" or whatever. It's possible we find out it's actually another party guest I guess (or more likely, that some number of them are involved as accomplices) but Brennan said last week we've met all the characters and it's too late to introduce a new person at this point. And Fletcher is such a through line in Sly and Daisy's stories, it would be weird to not go for the payoff.

(3) So Fletcher is alive. We know this. What would a dead but not dead criminal mastermind want? To ruin his arch nemesis, obv. So, how do you do that? Maybe you fake the death of some mouse to create an unsolvable murder to drive him crazy? And then maybe you work with the person who the fake murder pissed off (because of Sly's inability to "solve" it) to ruin Sly because that guy hates Sly now? And maybe you involve some element of faking deaths in your plan because a faked death is what was central to the original plot that made Sly's reputation and ruined your family? That's so convoluted but this is a guy who handcuffed himself to his enemy and jumped off a waterfall. He's clearly a drama queen and he has nothing but time.

(4) I think Sly has figured this out to some degree and he's decided that letting himself get captured is the best option for him at the moment. Like, he didn't protest at all. Which, yes, checks out to his laidback, posh casual persona but I think he knows that if anything happens to anyone while he's locked up then it casts suspicion on someone besides him or it means the "murders" have to stop because no one will kill anyone while he's not active as a possible suspect due to literally not being able to murder anyone. Speaking of--

(5) Yeah, I don't believe these are murders. All those dead bodies from the list? Badgers, corvids, horned animals. That's the badger fam and their spouses. And the one guy we "knew" was dead also doesn't seem to be dead (which Brennan seeded from the start with Conor's widow hearing his voice which seems possible if she lives so close and he was alive this whole time). I guess framing Sly for a full family murder or something was the plan? But that doesn't quite check out because presumably they'd un-die at some point and I feel like they wouldn't want to live under assumed identities in animal Bavaria or something. I know news doesn't travel fast w/o the internet but they're prominent people. News would spread I assume. Maybe the death faking was to make Sly believe he was crazy? Or to believe in ghosts? Messing with a genius's mind is I'm sure one of the worst things you can do. There's also Buck's Frankenstein theory which is a little out there but they were trying crazy stuff with electricity and dead bodies back in the day. Kind of a wild pull but cam sent me this about a Dr. Squires from the same-ish time period shocking someone back to life. It would be wild and now we have some alt explanations for the electricity but gotta explore all options. And this would Constance to call her dad a madman, lol.

(6) Grant/Sly has a lot more info than us with all those maddening redacted texts so it's very likely he has some long game happening we know nothing about. I wondered if he might have known about Fletcher for a while--when Daisy revealed he was alive he was surprised but I don't remember if he was surprised that he was alive or if it was ambiguous and it might just be that he didn't tell her. I assumed he didn't know at all (because I feel like that's what Brennan narrated in episode 1) but I need to go back and check.

(7) At the end of the day, D20 is a show that rewards love and friendship over betrayal and the like. This very much could be the first season with a real betrayal but I'm kinda skeptical. Sly could just be a big faker but he seems genuine to me. Also, what would his motive even be here? This doesn't seem like his style and I don't know why he'd do this.

(8) Lars failed their check on purpose and Ian saw full puppydog earnestness. Sly if you've been a bad guy this whole time and Lars didn't know, bitch I'll kill you

(9) Not really on topic but I want to note, Daisy's find of that second trick portrait makes me thing my theory was correct and there's a third somewhere. I wonder where.

(10) Even less on topic but the "Show Her Your Butt 2: Electric Boogaloo" sequence last week made me spit soda everywhere and I think that should be acknowledged.

#mice and murder #mice and murder spoilers #dimension 20 #dimension 20 spoilers #d20 #asks #madamxpresident

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idontwanttospoiltheparty · 3 years

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when/how did you realize beatles music was amazing and something you couldn't live without?

I'm trying to not start off every answer with "OOF" but you people do keep sending me loaded questions lol. That's fine though, I enjoy it, keep it coming! My close attachment to the bug boys (both their music and them) is new. It more or less started at the beginnng of May of this year.

I've always known about them and known a good handful of songs. We sang Yellow Submarine and Hello Goodbye in school, I have memories of playing Beatles Rockband once at my cousin's house and also the Love album used to be relatively regular car music for my family. Also, I was in class with someone who was obsessed with their music and sometimes she'd be playing songs. My opinion on the music for most of my life has been kind of… middling. There were songs I really liked or loved (like Help! or Eleanor Rigby) songs I thought were fine but didn't take much note of (something like Being For The Benefit of Mr Kite) and ones I just really didn't get the hype for (A Hard Day's Night comes to mind [I love it now]). But I have a sort of kneejerk sceptic reaction to people hyping stuff up for no discernible reason sometimes, and so the more I'd hear older people with little knowledge of music theory and history call them the be-all end-all of music, the more I sort of developed a kind of aversion to them. I just hate being told to respect and/or like things without knowing why, y'know?

PSA to older Beatles fans: you will NOT convince younger people to listen to your music by telling them their music taste sucks actually.

On the other hand, I had also sort of gotten the idea I should maybe go through their entire discography and get behind the myth of it all. I sort of attempted this a few times over the years, like I started listening to Sgt. Pepper once and then for some reason had to stop halfway, and I listened to the This Is The Beatles playlist on spotify a few nights in a row in 2019 lol.

What actually made me commit to doing it was 1) I had seen a LOT of backlash against Taylor for breaking the Beatles' records for 3 number one albums within the least amount of time in the UK last April, and like the sheer stupidity of some of the arguments being made why "Actually She Didn't Break This Record" really set me off (for example talking about it being "more effort" to buy an album back in the day… But the Beatles weren't competing for number one against anyone who had it "easier" to sell their albums and Taylor wasn't competing against anyone who had it "harder" than her. Or talking about absolute pure sales numbers when that's not what going number one means?) and 2) in a Discord I was in, someone shared a link to an 8-Bit version of Sgt. Pepper at the beginning of May, which I decided to listen to cause it seemed like good study music and I rather enjoyed! I found it really let their talent for creating good melodies shine through.

WHY DO I KEEP COMPLETELY EXPOSING MYSELF IN MINIATURE ESSAYS WHEN ASKED STRAIGHTFORWARD QUESTIONS

Anyways, so all of that made me go okay! I'm gonna go through this motherfucking huge discography then I will know this music better than a LOT of the people who hype it up and then I will be able to be objective about all of this.

So I listened to Sgt. Pepper and Please Please Me and then the White Album. The first was enjoyable but I didn't really ~get the immense hype, Please Please Me bored me at first (I think their early style is something you kind of need to get into and need to hear a few times to fully appreciate. But also Love Me Do sucks and why a record label thought it would be a good debut single is absolutely BEYOND ME) and the last one REALLY caught me off guard. There was stuff in there I loved (Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da is actually possibly my very first favourite song that wasn't a kids' song. I used to have to go to these psychomotor education classes and that song played there often and I adored it. Also Piggies slaps, send tweet) but also like a lot of stuff I found pretty weird and off-putting. And I still haven't warmed up to Yer Blues and Why Don't We Do It In The Road. That album did, however, get me very interested in the band. I think the weirdness of the album really just invited me to look into their history. I wanted to understand why they had broken up. That sent me down the rabbithole of the India trip history and I just kept reading more and more wikipedia articles related to all of it.

It was around this point I sort of came to realize that I'd had a lot of wrong preconceived notions about them, especially John. I was never someone like roaming around twitter, yelling for him to be cancelled, but he had simply never seemed sympathetic to me. For instance, IDK if I misunderstood what someone told me or if that person had misunderstood, but the story of John learning chords with Paul left-handed to follow him better (and maybe also Stuart not letting Paul change around the strings on his bass) had somehow been morphed into John finding Paul's left-handed playing off-putting and forcing Paul to play right-handed?? And I was like "Wow, what an asshole!" Also all the 1970 narrative that the two didn't like each other, plus I projected boomers' and gen-xers' Beatle snobism onto them and just got the impression they were pretentious narcissists. (I mean they were kind of that, but not to the extent or in the same way I imagined)

So I think learning these things opened me up to them more. Like I realized Hey! They were my age! And then at some point I found out about the Christmas albums and thought that was so fascinating, that that existed, (a huge part of my initial interest was my fascination with the marketing around them, which is why I watched AHDN and Help! super early on) so I listened to those and was like "Fuck! These guys are endearing!" and then I remember lurking on bug-tumblr and seeing that "Well that was very observant of them, because we aren't American actually" quote and I wanted to find the video of it and ended up finding this legendary video. And starting to actually like these guys and realizing they took all of this ten times less seriously than their Boomer fans do made me more excited to keep listening to the discography and look up more of the stories behind the songs and just kind of… Come to understand them better. I also found that once I accepted that some Boomers are just gonna hype up their fave music too much I'd enjoy it more. Like I'd listen to I Want To Hold Your Hand and get a bit defensive like "why do you love this so much??? the lyrics are so dumb??" but when I just kind of accepted that fact I realized no! It's an amazingly structured bop, which yes, has weak lyrics but it's fine!!! It's the Call Me Maybe of its day and that's NOT a bad thing!!

And in the end they have an amazingly versatile catalogue that covers most things you might be in the mood for. It is kind of hard (for me) not to like it.

There are still sort of two bands in my head: the archetype, the myth, the pretentious group of people who hate each other that I just sort of instinctively want to dislike and the band who sang all those songs I had NO IDEA existed and came into my life without any baggage or expectations from my part. I've pretty much never listened to say Hey Jude in the past months, even though I don't find it bad the outro is too fucking long because it's kind of got too much of that baggage to me still.

This was SUCH a ramble but I hope this makes sense to people to some extent. Anyways I'm a new fan, drag me, but maybe drag me more for how much I seem to know after three months. Seriously, this is a curse.

#mine #ask #bugs #anon

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b-rainlet · 3 years

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📓📓📓📓

- the-scarecrxw

(Since you sent 4 of those emojis I'm gonna go off but I'll stick to one in this answer and make seperate posts for the others aksnsns)

I can't give you anything Jonathan centric (that isn't Tommy/Jonathan, one of my fave rarepairs) but Jerome features in lots of my AUs.

This one is one of my faves that's entirely self-indulgent and if it ever gets written it's probably gonna be the longest fic I ever published (Again: If it ever gets written):

I gotta apologize in advance, it's just a fun little AU I haven't put too much thoughts into in terms of plotting so this is gonna be A. Long, B. Messy and C. A little chaotic

- First off, you gotta understand that @nsfwitchy2 Me had some fun with a pretty nonsensical and definitely not canon-compliant AU where Jerome and Jeremiah have three Mums (Tabby, Lee and Barbara, who all date) and live with them and Barbara Lee as their little sister.

- Ecco also lives with them, she sees herself as both the twins' gf more than a genuine part of the family tho (for now)

- (Meanwhile at Wayne Manor Alfred and Jim date and are very tired parents of Bruce and his clone 514A, in this AU - and pretty much every AU - nicknamed Brook)

- (Selina kinda goes back and forth between living at Wayne Manor or at Lee's place)

- Also, everyone dates. The twins. The clones. Eccomiah, Jecco, Batcat, Valeyne, Wayleska, they're all fucking

- Which isn't THAT important for this particular AU but I figured I'd give a warning xD

- This is mostly my attempt to give Tabitha some more backstory? Just...how I personally see her character and how I could see her end up if things would've went differently after S2

- The google docs file is called 'How Tabitha started being a Mum while disregarding canon completely' lmao

- Like her current life involves having 4 kids (if you count Selina) and two wives and that's a hell of an AU and I just like to overthink things and play with the way things would have needed to have gone in canon to have her 'end up' like this

- Also I can see her struggling with having a family all if a sudden (that isn't a manipulative brother or a weird cult)

-Especially if that involves Motherhood

- So on one hand it's a 'S2 until now' fic, explaining what happened to her in my canon

- But also - mostly because I find that easier to organize in my brain - it's interwoven with a 5+1-esque fic of all her children calling her 'Mum' (and her getting emotional over that)

- So it switches back and forth between the past and the present but for rambling's sake, I'll start with the past

- She still leaves Theo behind and flees with Silver but she keeps Silver close instead of immediately sending her away

- And her and Silver get taken in by Fish after they leave Theo because they have nowhere to go and Fish loves taking care of strays

- (Fish, who probably didn't end up in Indian Hill but rather lives in hiding until she is ready to strike against Penguin)

- She refers to herself as Liza's Mother in canon, you can't tell me she wouldn't instantly adopt Tabby and call her 'Honey' and give her motherly advice while Tabby tries to be all bite but actually enjoys somebody taking care of her for once

- Selina🤝Tabby

'Trying so very hard all the time to not show how soft and insecure they are'

- Actually, I'd start diverting from Canon even sooner aksnsjd

- Well not full on changing canon, but I'd...pepper in some stuff

- Like some scenes of her back with Theo and the Maniax

- Mostly her talking to Theo about Jerome's planned murder, which, yeah, she knows it's been set in stone from the beginning but that doesn't mean that she isn't talking about alternatives where he doesn't get killed off

- And Theo's like "Don't tell me you're going soft. No one will miss him. He was just a boy. Not worthy enough to be remembered."

- And later on she betrays him and goes 'I remember him'

- Anyway, they stay with Fish for a while but Tabby doesn't wanna keep Silver in Gotham

- So she sends her back to the school she went to before coming to Gotham with Theo (but makes sure their weird cult can't get their hands on her there)

- And Silver wants her to come with but Tabby says she has some unfinished business

- Aka she just doesn't wanna leave Barbara (who is in a coma atm, if Memory serves right)

- And Tabby's reasoning is that it's not safe in Gotham but really, she thinks she can't be responsible for another person

- "She needs a mother. A Family. I can't give her that." - "You are her family."

- So Silver's out of the picture and Tabby hangs with Fish until Barbara wakes up and they get together again (and never ever seperate)

- Also there's no Butch/Tabby because that was unnecessary as fuck

- And I gotta be honest, I haven't thought more about canon because Butch/Tabby alone makes my head hurt already but somehow they start dating Lee

- Who brings Jerome into the relationship because I sure am fond of Lee being Jerome's Mother (like as in, I have several wips with that concept alone not counting this one)

- Jerome probably came back to life after S3 and Lee fought to have him not be treated like a violent criminal but rather a child who was taken advantage of and after his release from Arkham (where she visited him and made sure he got some proper treatment) it seemed natural to have him live with her

- (But also he's still a criminal aksnsjs, you can see how much I thought about this)

- (Sue me for sticking to the heartfelt scenes and avoiding the mess that is plotting)

- Tabby and Barbara already had Selina and through Jerome, Jeremiah and Ecco were added et voila! Their Family is complete

- (Why exactly Barbara Lee exists if Tabby and Barbara have been non-stop dating since S2 I can't tell you, I simply think she is neat and I like the idea of big brother Jerome)

- (This AU? Self-indulgent? Why would you ever think that?)

- In the present however she is dealing with what is mostly referred to as 'feelings'

- Mostly panic at realizing that the bunch of weird children she's been living with are seeing her as some kind of parental figure

- Because suddenly they all call her 'Mum'

- Unsurprisingly the first one to call her Mum is Jerome at breakfast

- She's reading the newspaper and there's an article about a hostage situation the twins planned and he goes 'Mum, are you done with that? Can we see?'

- And they snatch it from her and argue about how they didn't even make the front page while Tabby nearly chokes on her coffee

- And of course she breaks down talks to her wives about it later while they get ready for bed because no one ever called her 'Mum' before

- Barbara's braiding her hair, while Lee's off to the side, getting ready for bed and it's very domestic and I am very gay

- But neither see it as a big deal because both of them have been called Mum before (by Jerome at least. Like. Immediately upon meeting them)

- So she's trying to be nonchalant about it because it's only a big deal if she makes it one

- While also not being able to deny the warm feeling that spreads throughout her body when Jerome keeps calling her 'Mum'

- Miah and Selina on the other hand are both hesitant to call anyone Mum

- Miah cause of Pride, Selina cause of her Mummy Issues

- But they both do at some point

- I think I have more notes on this SOMEWHERE but I kinda wanna have Miah call her Mum while he's ill (because we all know he'd be super fussy and want attention 24/7)

- So she humours him and while he's close to falling asleep - and she's totally not carding her fingers through his hair because she isn't soft or anything - he mumbles: "Thank you Mum" and she melts

- Selina would be more angsty

- Like, maybe it's her birthday and she disappears for a while (as she tends to do) but Tabby (who's closest to her) knows how hard this day is for her (since again her Mum isn't there with here and looks for her and brings her back home but doesn't make a big fuss out of her birthday

- Just...lets her be, gives her space but also lets her curl up close to her and maybe Selina doesn't call her Mum on that exact day

- But it's the day she realizes she wouldn't mind calling Tabitha her Mother, so she hesitantly tries it out a while later (maybe days, maybe weeks, however long it takes for her to feel comfortable with it) and they share a smile

- Then there's Barbara Lee, but she barely counts because she's a toddler and calls everyone 'Mummy'

- Even her father ajsnsnsn

- The last one would be Ecco because I have a very soft spot for Tabby and Ecco being close

- Ecco's rather formal with them for the longest time (she calls Barbara, Lee and Tabby 'Ma'am' for the most part because she may like them, but she doesn't think they see her as family. She's just the token girlfriend).

- So there's a scene where they connect, possibly over Tabby's hand and Ecco's head since I hc that Ecco gets headaches and migraines a lot (considering that she still gets shot in the head by Miah, like I said, this AU isn't necessarily the most bullet proof in terms of linear timelines)

- But so is Gotham so-

- So there's possibly a scene where Ecco's headache is getting super bad and no one's around (especially not Miah to dote on her) and Tabby awkwardly tries to bond by telling her about her hand and how she can't feel much (is a little clumsy with it) and Ecco immediately imprints on her like a duckling

- Maybe it's even the first time anyone reached out to Ecco in a way that feels genuine, especially without the twins or any of her (various) other partners being present so now she's willing to die for Tabby

- Which ends in her also calling her 'Mum' (while she keeps calling Lee and Barbara 'Ma'am' and Lee's so mad ajsnsjdj she was trying so hard to bond with this kid but couldn't quite get it right and you're telling her her socially pretty clumsy - but still wonderful of course - wife managed with just one conversation?? Slander

- And of course because I can't stop myself, there would be even more tidbits here and there of Tabby overcoming her previous way of living (as in, thinking caring or showing emotions is weakness) by having her reminisce a LOT about Theo

- For example by having Jerome climb into bed with her while Barbara's sleeping and Tabby is waiting for Lee to come home

- Lee works as a doc in the narrows which may be a little illegal, but the people didn't just stop needing help after her Queen of the Narrows arc was over, so I vote she keeps at it (and is held in very high regard for it by pretty much everyone)

- Tabby always stays up until everyone is home because she likes knowing where everyone is and that they're safe while Jerome has frequent nightmares and wanders around the house, so this isn't a rare occurrence

- And sometimes, they talk Theo

- "You miss him?" - "Don't know."

- "I wish he was still alive so I could kill him." - "....Me too." - "Which one?" - "...Both."

- (ajajsbssj this is all just copy pasted and cleaned up a lil', leave me and my pretentious way of writing dialogue alone)

- Tabby also has a lot of interludes where she thinks about what growing up with Theo was like/her childhood in general

- How she always protected him from other children bullying him and how they swore to have each other's back but how in hindsight, she was the one doing all the dirty work for him, helping him fulfill his dream and enact his revenge

- Realizing that he probably never cared for her, not like she cared for him

- There's also allusions to them having sex because you cannot tell me they did NOT have sex

- And it ends with Tabby realizing that she is quite happy with how she ended up, even if it's neither how she thought she would ever live nor what her old self would've even wanted, possibly seeing too many attachments as 'weak' judging by the way she canonly used Butch for convenience sake at first

- And yeah, maybe now she can provide the family - the Mother - somebody else desperately needs

- So she brings Silver home

#This isn't at all presentable #Because the AU is all over the place still #But I am sharing it anyway #Tag: Happy Family #Long Post #WIP Rambles

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aubrey-plaza · 4 years

Text

CREATOR TAG MEME

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

I was tagged by:

Sarah / @timothyolyphant. Sarah Sarah Sarah, where do I even begin. Started from the bottom now we here but it’s actually started from an ask I sent on anon about getting sunburnt in Bali, and now we here. Life always manages to remind me that through adversity you forge valuable bonds and you are one of those. Your gifs are amazing and your personality is even more stunning. I love talking to you and I love seeing much you love fostering people’s creativity. It has truly made me look at gifmaking in a different light and injected to much fun and positivity into this. So thank you, friend <3

Nums / @cillianmurphy. Nums, my love, fellow Bulb. What could I possibly have done so well in the past to deserve your presence in my life! Always teaching me new slang by osmosis and always a balm to my weathered heart, you lift even the darkest days with your kindness, consideration, and love for Paddington 2 best movie ever made. Plus your gifmaking brain is full chefs kiss. Thank you for teaching me so many things. One day when the world stops being so crazy I WILL visit you and hug you and that is a threat <3

Kumi / @hollywoods. Kumi, my cat icon kin. Simply said, I think your gifmaking skills are out of this world and your graphics live rent free in my mind. Your humour never fails to make me laugh and I need you to know that I STILL think about the time you described yourself as wearing a jester outfit jangling across the court for a laff. You’re a bright spot in my life and I’m grateful I’ve gotten to know you this year. Please never stop being so amazing <3

Cece / @nickyoung. Cece my darling. Thank you SO much for joining my lovecraft sideblog, I literally could not have done it without you. We don’t talk a lot but that doesn’t mean I don’t value you so much. Your creativity is incredible and your sets are SO fucking gorgeous and honestly goals. Seeing you flourish fills me with so much pride and joy and I’m so happy we got to know each other this year <3

Okay emo stuff out of the way, time for my favourite edits! There were a lot and im indecisive so here goes:

max max: fury road set - I like to call this set “kate learns how to make a colour set.” I learned how to make gifs and mmfr is one of my all-time favourite movies so it was only right that I made a set. I always thought this movie was only orange and blues, but making this gifset made me fall in love with the movie even more

birds of prey / dinah lance set - Dinah Lance love of my life. If you’ve followed me this year, you will know that I went into birds of prey a person and left birds of prey a dinah lance stan. I previously made a birds of prey colour set, but I wanted to do one JUST for dinah. I’ve seen one too many people say that it’s hard to do colour sets of poc so I had to see for myself and I’m SO proud of how colourful this set is. plus, yknow, I love her.

pacific rim / stacker pentecost set - pacrim is one of my FAVOURITE movies and this character has so many iconic lines. This lowkey turned into a colour set which isn’t hard for a movie like pacrim.

record stores in films set - I woke up one sunday morning and my brain was YELLING at me to make this set. I downloaded 25 movies that all have iconic record store scenes and watched every single one and ended up with ten perfect gifs. I cut so many movies bc they didn’t work as well and I’m so sad abt that but I had SO much fun watching the movies and ended up falling in love and finding a new fave in the compilation so it was really a Project and I had Fun.

the old guard set - this line makes me SO feral and I just HAD to gif it. It’s one my favourites because it’s my new lesson for life.

BONUS: my Lovecraft Country sets. This show taught me SO much and despite it’s awful ending, I’m still grateful for the first 7 episodes and I did end up making 65 sets for it over 10 weeks so I feel it deserves a special place in my 2020 recap

women in history - learning about history through a show, is there anything better? This set in particular was SO easy to make and took me literally 20 minutes, but that’s because it’s built on a solid foundation of knowledge. I knew the moment I saw a character which person in history she was and I think that’s a kudos to the show and to how well they taught me stuff. Also these other historical sets.

leti lewis outfits - took me FOR EVER. still fun tho.

episode 2 colours - speaks for itself but this show is so STUPID to colour and you can never use a psd bc every scene is lit differently but making a colour set was so much fun because of the challenge

this name etymology set - this took me four days and SO much time but im so proud of it because I tried new techniques and learned so much

Tagging some friends because I love seeing y’alls creations but I want to know what YOUR favourites are!

@vicspedretti @daisylouisejohnson @dani-clayton @hannahsgrose @jodiewhittakerr @hannahjohn-kamen @robintunney @chris-evans @alex-krycek @clintfbarton @bosemanchadwick @chloebeale @hailesteinfeld @timeslord @melsmonroe @annelisters @owenjoyner

#tag game #tagged #sorry this is so long #fave #michael jackson #k8txt #misc #friend tag

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what-is-your-plan-today · 5 years

Text

Stark Spangled Banner: Stab Me In The Front

Part 1: America’s Asshole

Intro: It’s been a year since Katie was held hostage by Hydra, and whilst she’s still working through her feelings she has an idea about how she can make other people’s lives better as a result of her ordeal. Alongside this, she needs to take a trip to Boston to meet Harlan Thrombey-SIP’s latest author. Slightly nervous about taking a business trip alone after what happened last time, Steve offers to go with her.

What could possibly go wrong?

Warnings: Bad language. SMUT (NSWFW)

Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

Square Filled : “Mistaken Identity” @avengersbingo A/N: So, here we go. An Avengers/Knives Out Cross Over where Katie and Steve come face to face with America’s Asshole! The tongues are sharp and the knives are out! This is set in 2015 so way before the KO storyline so therefore contains no spoilers! You don’t need to have read SSM to understand or enjoy but please do so if you wish.

Main Masterlist

**Shout out to @icanfeelastormbrewing for being my Insult Partner when I was writing this!!**

PLEASE PLEASE REBLOG and COMMENT, This is probably my fave part of this fic I’ve written to date!!

October 2015

“So, Mr Thrombey, that’s all confirmed.” Katie said, tapping at a key on her computer to lock the meeting in her calendar “11 am, Next Thursday, the 15th ”

“I’ll send you through the zip code and location for your GPS.” Harlan responded “The house is just outside of Lincoln, not far from Pierce Park. It shouldn’t be too far for you if you’re staying at the Harbor.”

“Thank you.” Katie smiled as she spoke into her phone, “I look forward to meeting you on Thursday Sir.”

“Oh, less of the Sir, Harlan please. And the pleasure is all mine Miss Stark…I mean, Mrs Rogers, my apologies!” The man chuckled “And thank you for accommodating my need to pull this meeting forward by a few days.”

“It’s not a problem.” she assured him. They exchanged pleasantries again and then she cut the call and leaned back in her chair, cracking her neck, before she double checked the travel arrangements. The hotel was booked, flight was sorted, hire care was confirmed. All that she needed to do was not forget the annotated manuscript or the cover ideas.

The door to her office opened and she looked up to see Tony leaning in the doorway, waving a Starbucks cup at her one of their familiar brown paper bags, clearly bearing treats.

“I love you bro…” she smiled at him as he wandered in, chuckling, placing the drink and paper bag down in front of her. She looked into the bag and gave a moan when she saw it was a rather large, gooey looking brownie, and gave a bigger moan when she sipped her drink and found it to be a Pumpkin Spiced Latte. “Perfect Elevenses!”

“Well thought you might need one, you’ve been locked in here since 7 this morning…”

“You got FRIDAY spying on me?” she narrowed her eyes at him.

“No.” he said at the same time the AI affirmed her suspicions.

“He has indeed had me watch you, Mrs Rogers.” “Traitor.” Tony rolled his eyes and Katie chuckled

“Well I had all this Harlan Thrombey stuff to sort, Steve’s still in Copenhagen with Sam chasing the alleged latest sighing of Bucky.” she shrugged “Not much point in lying in when you’re wide awake is there?”

“True.” Tony nodded. “Are you going back to the Compound tonight?”

“I dunno.” she shrugged “I might just stay here again if that’s ok?”

“Kiddo, you own part of this Tower, it’s always gonna be your home too.” Tony shrugged, “You can stay as long as you want.”

“Thanks Tone.” she smiled. She didn’t want to admit it, but she felt safer in the Tower whilst Steve was away, even thought it was ridiculous as the Compound was just as secure, being closer to her brother was a comfort.

“I haven’t forgotten what tomorrow is.” Tony said gently, looking at her.

“Funnily enough me neither.” she sighed “I should be celebrating, a year to the day Bucky broke me out of that fucking shit hole in Canada.” she pulled off her glasses, another remnant of her time with HYDRA. Since she’d been kept for 6 weeks in that horrific cell she’d needed glasses for anything that required a long period of concentration on a computer screen or monitor if she wanted to avoid migraines. Bruce seemed to think it was something to do with the fact that her cell had been painfully bright all the time and that continued exposure to artificial light in such a way triggered a subconscious response.

She swallowed “I’ve been trying not to think about it.” she said gently.

“Which is why I booked you and Pepper into the Dominick for the afternoon.” he smiled at her “Well, Pepper has, I’ve just given her the credit card…full deep tissue massage, facial and then Franco’s booked to do your hair…and don’t bother telling me you’re busy as I had your diary cleared and everything reschedule to next week” he watched as she opened her mouth before shutting it,, shaking her head softly. “You leave in 30 minutes.”

“You spoil me.” she smiled softly.

“Anything for my girls, plus I thought it might keep you busy whilst Spangles is otherwise engaged.”

“He was hoping to be back but when I spoke to him before he doesn’t know if he’s gonna be.” she shrugged “it is what it is.” Tony smiled at her before he stood up “Yes, it is. And this afternoon is your pamper time so get your shit together and meet Pepper downstairs.”

“Yes sir.” she said, saluting him with a grin.

As with anything Pepper or Tony booked, the spa was off the scale. Katie had been meaning to go for ages, and now, as she sat in the chair in Franco’s salon she was already searching available dates to go back with Natasha and Wanda. She laughed and joked with the stylist and Pepper, the pair of them enjoying yet another bottle of champagne as they had their hair done. A couple of hours later, at just gone 7pm, Pepper dragged her out over the road and into a ridiculously expensive wine bar.

“Feeling better?” Pepper asked as Katie took a huge gulp of her Sancerre.

Katie smiled “Much, thank you.” “You know, I’m always here if you want to talk to someone other than Steve about stuff.” Pepper looked at her “And it won’t go any further.”

“That’s the thing, I don’t wanna talk about it…” Katie sighed “You know, Pep, I see all these women out there, read their testimonies and things and I just wonder how they’re so strong, like, how can they can just stand up and talk about what happened to them?” she trailed off, shaking her head “And me? I just wanna pretend it never happened. So much for being an Avenger huh?”

“Hey…” Pepper shook her head, looking at her sternly. “Stop that, right now.” “Well it’s true.” Katie shrugged “I mean, I’m a public figure right? But all people know is I was missing for 6 weeks, but it was put down to a mission gone awry. I just..well, I feel like I should be out there, trying to make a difference, helping people.”

“Kiddo, what you went through…” Pepper swallowed “I can’t even begin to imagine. And how you’ve dealt with and processed it, well, frankly I don’t know how you’ve been so strong. There is no shame in wanting to simply move on and leave it in the past.”

“I know.” Katie said softly “Thank you. Having everyone around me makes me realise how lucky I actually am. I’ve got a huge support network. Not everyone who goes through...” she swallowed, not quite able to say it “not everyone has that to fall back on.” Pepper pondered something before she looked at Katie, “You know, we haven’t picked our Partner Charity for the Stark Relief Fund next year…we could make it one that deals with Sexual violence. No need to go into details as to why.” Katie considered that for a moment, before she nodded “That’s not a bad idea.” she clicked her nails against her wine glass, thoughtfully “It would make a difference, right?”

Pepper nodded. “Absolutely. Give it some thought, see how you feel.” “I will, thanks.” she smiled.

****

Steve was exhausted but wasn’t willing to spend another moment away from his wife. So the moment the jet was down he headed straight for the garage, jumped on his bike and roared out of the compound heading down town towards Manhattan.

“Good Evening Captain Rogers…” FRIDAY greeted him as he pressed his palm to the access pad at the rear entrance from the underground car park “Mrs Rogers is in your apartment.”

“Thanks FRIDAY.” he said, as the elevator began to rise. It stopped a few floors up, and when the doors flew open he was greeted by Tony who was undoing his tie.

“Oh, you’re back.” he said, looking at Steve appraisingly.

“You’re up late.” Steve looked at him.

“Just working on a few things.” Tony said vaguely. “How was the search for Tin Man?” “Well, it was him alright.” Steve said, running a hand down his tired face “Few more leads to work on. We could have stayed out there for a bit longer truth be told but, well, I wanted to be here tomorrow, you know.” Steve said, shrugging.

The two men shared a moment of understanding, both of them having experienced unsurmountable raw pain and anguish over the 6 weeks Katie had been missing and it wasn’t something they were likely to forget any time soon. If ever.

“She know you’re home?” Tony looked at him again. Steve shook his head.

“Wanted to surprise her.”

Tony smiled softly, “She’s probably asleep. Her and Pep have been in the Spa all afternoon and they’ve drunk a lot so…”

Steve gave a huff of a laugh “Yeah she messaged me before saying you’d sent her there out for the afternoon. That was really thoughtful of you Tony.” “Well it happens occasionally.” Tony said as the elevator stopped at his floor. “Listen, Steve…”

Steve turned to face him.

“She’s not been herself the last few weeks.” Tony scratched at his beard and Steve took a deep breath.

“I know.” he said gently “I think she’s just, well, processing, if that’s the right word. We only got back from our honeymoon 3 weeks and it kinda hit her when we got back just what time of year it was. Whilst we were away she didn’t have time to think about it.”

“Just…well, take care of her for me ok?” Tony said, looking at the Soldier.

Steve nodded “Always Tony, you had my word on that when I told you I wanted to marry her, and I meant it.”

Tony nodded and clapped him on the shoulder, giving him a look of thanks before he left the elevator on the Part Floor level. It began to rise again and Steve let out a soft sigh. Tony was right, the last 2 weeks in particular Katie had been a little quiet, less vivacious, almost withdrawn even. At first he had put it down to post honeymoon blues but Natasha had pointed out that this time 12 months ago she had been at the mercy of Hydra, with those bastards brutalising her in ways that he couldn’t even bring himself to think about. For this reason, he’d been reticent to go on the latest mission but Katie had insisted, pointing out that they couldn’t not carry on with their lives and that she would be alright.

The fact she had basically moved back into the Tower for the 3 days he had been gone, however, made him think that she wasn’t quite as alright as she had told him.

The doors opened on their floor and he stepped out. It was mostly dark as he headed through to the bedroom where he found that the TV was playing on the wall, but Katie was fast asleep, one of the pillows clutched to her chest as a makeshift cuddle partner. With a soft smile he closed the door and headed over to the bed. Kicking off his boots he lay on his side, facing her, and brushed her soft hair back off her face before pressing a kiss to the bridge then tip of her nose and finally her lips.

She stirred, her face scrunching up in that adorable way it always did, before she blinked her eyes open. It took her a second to focus but when she did her lips curled upwards into a soft smile which became an ear to ear grin.

“Hey sweetheart.” he said softly, kissing her again, his hand cupping her face.

“You’re home.” she said, reaching up to lay her hand over his. “Why didn’t you tell me you were coming back?”

“Wanted to surprise you.” he smiled.

“Well it worked.”

“I missed you.” he said softly, his thumb caressing her cheekbone.

“Missed you more.” she shot back and he chuckled.

“Doubt it. How was the Spa?”

“Oh it was amazing.” she gushed, her eyes shining “I had this deep tissue massage and the guy hit spots on my back I didn’t even know I had. The facial was great, and my hair…”

“I like the colour.” he said smiling, gently moving his hand so he twirled a piece around his finger. The ends were slightly lighter than usual, almost a dark honey blonde, and it extended a little up the strands before evening out.

“It’s called ballayage.” she smiled at him. “I just fancied a bit of a change.”

“Looks good on you.” he smiled “I’m glad you had a nice time, you deserve it.”

“How was the mission?” she asked “Worth it?”

“Yes and no.” he shrugged “We have a few more leads we can chase up but…” he took a deep breath “I’m beginning to wonder what the point is. He clearly doesn’t wanna be found.”

“The point is he’s your friend, your brother.” Katie smiled, moving her hand to run her fingers over his jawline, the pads scratchings lightly against his 5-oclock shadow. “Maybe he just needs a bit of time to find himself first, that doesn’t mean you have to give up on him. Besides, I need to give him back his jacket.”

“And I need to thank him.” Steve said, “For getting my beautiful girl out and safe.”

“I can’t believe it’s been a year tomorrow since he found me.” she said softly

“Is that what’s been bothering you?” he asked.

“Huh?”

“The last few weeks you’ve not been yourself.”

She licked her lips and nodded “Yeah, I just…well, I didn’t give it much thought when we were on our honeymoon, you know, but since coming back and ramping up the Thrombey Campaign it’s kinda hit home a little.” And suddenly Steve understood. SIP were publishing the man’s latest book, “The Colour of Revenge” which was all about a Detective on the trail of a killer who was hunting down and dispatching of 6 men who had been acquitted of a gang rape and murder.

“Shit…” he let out a groan “Honey I…I’m so stupid not to realise that…” “Hey.”she frowned, “Don’t…” She reached up and smoothed the lines that had appeared on his brow and he let out a sigh, gently reaching up to lace his fingers with hers, bringing her hand towards him and placing a soft kiss on her wrist.

“It’s better now you’re home.” she said gently. He smiled and gave her a gentle kiss again.

“Is that everything?” he pressed and she hesitated again.

“I’m scared.” she said eventually, looking at him.

“Scared of what?”

“Going away, on my own.” she sighed, tears brimming in her eyes “I hate that they made me like this Steve.”

He let out a sigh, he hated that she was scared too. She didn’t deserve it.

“Why don’t I come with you?” he asked, the idea suddenly forming in his mind. She stilled for a moment and he continued “Not to the actual meeting, but I can drop you off and pick you up, hang around, whatever you want me to do.”

She looked up at him smiling softly, not even trying to pretend she wasn’t relieved he had offered. “Would you?”

“Of course.” he nodded, wiping the tears off her face. “You only had to ask.” “I didn’t want to.” she admitted “I know how busy you are here and…” “That can wait.” he said, holding her face in his hands as he drove his message home “you’re the most important thing in my life and if me coming with you makes you feel better then…” he shrugged “Besides, I’ve always wanted to go to Boston.”

“We can make a little trip out of it if you like?” she said, somewhat hopefully “Come back on the Saturday?”

“Sure.” he smiled at her. “Let’s do it.”

“Oh Stevie you’re gonna love it.” she beamed, and he smiled at the way her face had gone from being furrowed with worry to alive with excitement. “Massachusetts is amazing in the fall and Boston is just stunning…” “Well I’ll make sure I bring my sketch book.” he smiled “Give me something to do whilst you’re in the meeting.” “Thank you.” she said softly. “I’ll book us somewhere nice to eat one night. Give us an excuse to wear something pretty.”

“Like you need an excuse.” he teased, and she nipped him harshly on the arm. He chuckled and then with a groan he unwillingly pushed himself up off the bed.

“I need a shower.” he said, almost apologetically. “I won’t be long.”

“You better not be.” she muttered and he smiled, dropping a kiss to her forehead before he headed into the bathroom.

True to his word, he wasn’t long. 5 minutes, tops. But by the time he came back, the TV was off and Katie was fast asleep. Thinking back to what Tony had said, he found himself wondering if she had actually slept much at all whilst he was gone.

Steve dried himself off, stepped into a clean pair of boxers and then slid into the bed next to his wife, slipping his arms around her. Once her back was nestled snugly into his chest, he dropped a soft kiss to her neck and closed his eyes, happy to have her in his arms.

****

Steve woke the next morning to find his girl tangled around him. She’d shifted in the night, clearly, and now her face was pressed into his chest, right leg snaked between both of his, her right hand was slid under his arm, lightly gripping his shoulder whilst her left rested against her head, fingers in her hair. Smiling to himself he pulled her closer, relishing the feel of her against him. She murmured something incoherently as she gently moved, her cheek pressing into the hair on his chest, the hand around his shoulder slid down to the base of his back where her fingers simply rested, soft against his spine as she continued to sleep.

And Steve was quite happy to let her nap for longer, using him as her own personal cuddly toy.

He dozed in and out of consciousness again, drifting off for another 10 minutes or so, before he felt Katie stirring in his arms, and a soft kiss gently being pressed to his jaw line. He smiled at the contact and tightened his hold on her again, his eyes still closed.

“Morning beautiful.” he said softly, his voice still thick with sleep.

“Morning soldier.” she said, her cheek returning to his chest as she basked in the safety and warmth of his hold as his hand crept up the back of the stolen shirt she was wearing, his rough fingers ever so gentle against her skin as he trailed the pads up and down her spine.

“Sleep ok?” he asked, his eyes still not opening.

“Yeah.” she assured him, truthfully. It had been the best night sleep she’d had in days.

“Good. What do you fancy doing today?”

He felt her still and then she pulled back slightly, and at that he opened his eyes and blinked to see those gorgeous emeralds locked onto him.

“Are you not needed at the Compound?”

He shook his head “Kitten, I’ve not seen you for almost 3 days so I figured we deserved one together.”

She groaned “I have meetings this morning.” “That’s ok, I’ll meet you at lunch.” he said, tucking her hair behind her ear.

She didn’t argue. She knew full well why he’d taken the time out, and frankly she adored him for it. Without saying a word she leaned up and captured his lips in a gentle kiss that quickly became heated…but was shattered by the piercing noise of Katie’s alarm.

She gave a groan, and made to move.

“Don’t you dare…” Steve mumbled against her mouth, his grip on her tightening.

“Stevie…” she sighed “I gotta…”

He reached over, his large body flattening her into the mattress making her giggle as he swiped across the screen of her StarkPhone silencing it.

“You ain’t gotta do shit…” he said, hovering over her on his elbows. “Except me.” he added as an afterthought.

“Oh so you’re gonna to explain to the board why I’m late?” she looked at him.

“To be honest...” he said, dipping his head to trail hot kisses up the side of the next “...they probably won’t even notice you’re not there. I mean, are you really that important?”

“Fuck you.” she giggled back.

“Believe me, I’m tryin’” he quipped, his mouth nipping at her ear lobe. That made her giggle even more and she felt his lips curve into a smile against her skin.

“I love it when you do that.” he said gently, using his leg to part hers, leaving a large thigh pressed against her mound.

“What?”

“Laugh.” he said, his mouth moving up her jaw line “Makes me happy.”

“You’re such a sentimental sap.” she mumbled, as his lips claimed hers again, the heat between her legs intensifying as the kiss grew deeper, tongues lashing against one another. Steve pulled back for long enough to pull his shirt over her head before his lips returned to hers and Katie’s hand slid into his hair, one hand gently winding into the longer locks on top, her nails on the other dragging against the hairline on his neck. His hands moved, one gently cupping the side of her face, the other, gently skimming over her breast, her nipples already hardened. He gently teased one with the pad of his thumb and his mouth moved down to the other, his tongue and lips working in tandem. She gave a little involuntary twitch against his thigh and once more his lips quirked up into a smirk.

“You want something baby girl?” he asked, peeking up at her and she nodded.

“Stevie, don’t make me beg, please.”

And when she asked so nicely like that, how could he ever refuse? He hooked his fingers into the sleep shorts she was wearing and worked them down, before flipping down the waist band of his boxers. Katie bent her legs, as he shuffled upwards and worked into her, the pair of them letting out a groan each at the contact. Steve’s hands fell to either side of Katie’s face as he held himself up on his forearms, kissing her deeply as he flexed his hips forward, again and again, picking up a gentle rhythm.

It was soft, it was gentle, it was loving, everything she knew her soldier to be and it wasn’t long before he had her writhing and groaning loudly, his lips assaulting that spot on her neck.

“So good…” he groaned, his thrusts getting deeper. “Feel so good kitten…”

“Keep talking.” she keened, arching into him as her hands raked down his back.

“You were made for me, God I love you Mrs Rogers. So fucking much…” he said, his words punctuated by his heavy breaths as she gave a soft cry, her head falling backwards, eyes fluttering shut as she tightened around him, her legs shuddering slightly as she came.

“Atta girl.” he said, his hips becoming faster as he thrust through her orgasm, chasing his own. It wasn’t long before he felt the ribbons in his belly unravel and he came with a cry of his own, his head buried in her neck, hips slowing, thrusts going deeper before he eventually stilled, a loud contented sigh escaping his mouth.

After a few moments of them simply basking in the afterglow, Katie’s hands trailing through Steve’s ruffled hair as his nose slid against hers, she gave a sigh and pushed on his shoulders gently.

“Baby I really do need to get up.”

He pouted a little causing her to chuckle before he rolled off her and she pushed herself out of bed, heading for the en-suite. Steve watched her go before he swung his legs from under the covers,, found his boxers, pulled them on and headed down to the kitchen to make them both some coffee. *****

The idea had sprung to Katie as she’d headed out for lunch. The local shop was donating a percentage of its earnings that month to a homeless charity, and it set her mind whirring.

“So you want to donate, all the profit we make, from what is going to likely be the biggest book SIP will ever publish, to charity?” Tony looked at her.

“In a nutshell, yeah.” she said, nodding “We can split it across various charities, all those that help victims of sexual assault, abuse or crime…”

“Isn’t that what the Stark Relief Fund is for?” Saul, the SI Finance Director looked at her, and she nodded.

“Yes, but it isn’t just about the money…it’s about raising awareness.” she pressed “A lot of people don’t know those charities existed. Hell, I didn’t know about half of them until a year ago. If we do this, think of the publicity and the press and…”

She trailed off, looking at Tony. He could see the excitement shining in her eyes. She had a point, and it wasn’t like SI needed the money. SIP was her company after all, and if she wanted to use it to do something good, help people, maybe even help herself…then that was fine by him.

He shrugged and looked round the table “SIP’s vision was never about making money.” he said, and Katie beamed at her brother as she realised he was backing her “It was always about helping those who needed a hand to get their work out there…I don’t see why in this case, where they author is already so well-known we can’t use that to help those who need it.”

There was a pause and she looked expectantly round the table. One by one the board members seemed to concede, all of them that is bar their Legal Manager, Dan Robertson who was frowning.

“You’re going to have to bring Mr Thrombey on board Mrs Rogers.” he said, looking at her. “We can’t just use his book as part of a campaign without his permission.” “I know.” she said, nodding. “I’ve already realised that. I’m meeting him on Thursday next week, I’ll have a full proposal and pitch ready.”

There were a few murmurs around the table before Tony spoke “Is that it? Are we settled?”

Everyone looked at one another, nodding, and Katie leaned back in her chair, smiling.

But, she wasn’t smiling now. She had less than 24 hours before they set off for Boston and her pitch was only half way through completion.

“Sweetheart.” Steve’s hands slid over her shoulders where she sat on the chair in her office. She looked effortlessly elegant, even in sweats and an off the shoulder sweater, one toned leg stretched out in front of her, the other bent at the knee so her foot was resting on the seat of the chair, her left hand was curled around her shin, her right was tapping at her keyboard. “It’s late.”

“I know but…” She sighed, “This means a lot to me Steve…I need it to be right.”

Steve knew better than to argue. Instead he leaned over and kissed the side of her neck. “What are you stuck with?”

“I dunno it just…it all seems so impersonal.” she removed her glasses and wrinkled her nose as he sat down in the arm chair in the corner of the room “Facts and figures on sexual assaults and stuff…we all know it happens, it’s about making people want to do something about it.”

“Are you ready to make it personal?” he asked gently, taking a deep breath. He hated thinking about what she had gone through, he truly did, and if he had half a chance he’d rip the bastards limb from limb. But if she was ready to confront what had happened to her, he had to be there to support and back her all of the way, regardless of his own feelings.

“I don’t know.” she said softly “I was talking to Pepper about this the other day. I should be able to, I should be someone other women can look up to, being an Avenger and all but…maybe I’m just not strong enough.” “You’re the strongest person I know.” he leaned forward and locked eyes with her.

“I don’t feel like it when it comes to this.” she sighed.

“Honey…” he scratched at his head “Without wanting to sound flippant, since January this year, you’ve been, ok…well maybe ok isn’t the word but you’ve gotten on with things. You’ve moved forward, we both did.”

“Because we were busy, and we had no choice…”

“Well maybe…” he shrugged “But chasing down a sceptre, fighting Ultron, mobilising a new base, planning a wedding, running a business…it’s all time consuming, stressful stuff that if you really weren’t strong enough to deal with what happened, then it would have all gone to shit and probably tipped you over the edge into a nervous breakdown.”

She brushed a piece of hair behind her ear as she considered what he was saying.

“Honestly…” he continued, his eyes boring into hers. “If you want my opinion I think the fact that it’s the year’s anniversary of what happened that’s playing on your mind a little. You need to stop, look back and how well you’ve done and stop beating yourself up about all the things you haven’t”

She smiled softly and looked down at her hands before she glanced back up at him “When did you get so wise?” He chuckled “Well I am 97 years old.”

She laughed “You don’t look a day over 28.”

He smiled and stood up “I’m gonna make you a hot chocolate, and you’re gonna stop overthinking that and come relax, we’re up early tomorrow. You can do the rest at the hotel tomorrow evening.” “No can do, we’re going out.” she grinned at him “I booked the Chef’s table at Menton…”

“The what?” Steve frowned.

“You never heard of a Chef’s table?” she looked at him, and he shook his head “oh my God I’ve let you down…so badly. Check this out.” she tapped on her computer, bringing up the website and showed him the photos “It’s a private table with a glass wall that gives you a direct view into the kitchen. Totally impossible to get a reservation unless you book like a year in advance…or name drop.”

Steve groaned “You seriously dropped the Captain America wants a table line?”

“Yup” she popped the p as she smirked, closing down the browser page.

“Pain in my ass.” he grumbled, standing up. But as he left the office there was a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.

One that his wife had seen.

*****

“So, was it worth a name drop?” Katie asked as they walked back into the Fireside Lounge located in their hotel.

“I’m happy to overlook the fact you acted like a total brat to make that reservation, yes.” he grinned as he went to remove her coat from her shoulders. He looked her up and down, the jump suit she was in was driving him crazy.

She grinned, and shivered slightly.

“Cold?” he asked, frowning.

“A little, don’t wanna sit in my coat though.”

“Do you want me to nip up to the room, grab your cardigan?”

“Would you?” she asked, even though she knew perfectly well he would.

“Course.” he said, dropping a kiss to her cheek “You get the drinks in, be right back.”

She headed over to the bar. The bartender, Will, was the same one who had been on before so he greeted her with a smile.

“Mrs Rogers. How was your meal?”

“Fantastic thank you.” she grinned “Can I get 2 Bourbon’s please? I’ll leave it to your choice, I’ll be back in a second, just need to nip to the bathroom.”

She excused herself and once she’d finally had the pee she’d been dying for since they left the restaurant, she set about touching up her make-up, smiling to herself. She’d deliberately picked this jumpsuit as she knew it got Steve’s blood pumping. It was a simple, plain black one with a V-neck line, but it was tight. Teamed with a thin red leather belt, red leather Jimmy-Choos and a matching bag all set off by the bright red lipstick she was sporting, she knew she looked good. Not that Steve had much room to talk, she could happily perve on him in the dark grey suit he was wearing, teamed with a black dress shirt, his collar left open…he looked good enough to eat, which she was planning on doing later.

She headed back into the bar and spotted Steve perched on one of the stools.

“Hey handsome” she said, slipping her arms round him from the back. But the moment she did that she realised something was off. He felt different, he was softer than Steve was. He smelt different, there was a really heavy woody scent to his aftershave whereas Steve’s preferred Hugo Boss or Gucci, depending on his mood, were both a lot lighter. And when the man spun to face her, although the likeness was indeed uncanny at first glance, his eyes were cold and calculating, his jaw line wasn’t quite as sharp as Steve’s and the smirk he wore on his face was nothing like the cheeky one Steve would sport. It was almost a sneer which spread across his face, every feature laced with disdain.

“What the fuck?” the man glared at her as Katie stepped back, holding her hands up in apology.

“I’m sorry, genuine case of mistaken identity…” she said, taking him in. His shirt was the wrong colour too, only she hadn’t been able to see that from the back.

“Yeah well if you’re touting for business I already got some today so get lost…” the man drawled in his light, Boston accent. “Like I just said I thought you were…hang on…” She frowned as his words registered “You already got some?”

“Yeah, that’s right.” he said, looking her up and down.

“You think I’m a hooker?” Katie snorted.

“Pretty high end one though, I’ll give you that.” the man said, nodding at her.

“I’m not a hooker.” she shook her head, laughing in disbelief.

“Oh, sorry. Do you prefer the term escort?” he raised an eyebrow.

She rolled her eyes, flashing her left hand at him. “I’m married, this was a genuine mistake….” she said, her temper rising slightly. She moved away from him to the side, nodding at Will who slid the check over for her to sign to charge the drinks to their room.

Ransom observed her for a moment, fighting the smirk that was threatening to break across his face. After another row with his stupid Libtard cousin and his mother who had been at his Grandfather’s house before, he’d come out with the sole intention of getting laid and then so drunk he could hardly remember his name. After a visit to one of his usual fuck buddies he’d achieved the first part, now he was concentrating on the second. He’d been initially irritated by this woman’s interruption, but now she was getting sassy back, and he wasn’t about to let it drop. He could tell she had money, that much was clear to see. The way she talked, held herself, was dressed. Whilst she wasn’t a hooker as he had originally thought (although to be fair to her, she was pretty hot, he’d consider fucking her if the opportunity arose) she was probably living off some 70 odd year old rich banker husband. A trophy wife. Huh, maybe she wanted a fuck after all…hell, he might not have to pay for it. Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth and all that.

“And does your husband know you’re here trying to tap me up?” he looked at her.

“You know, if I was trying to errr…tap you up, you wouldn’t be able to afford me” she shot back, signing her name on the cheque with a flourish.

“Try me.” Ransom shot back, making a show of looking her up and down. “How much for that ass?” “I’ll kick yours for free you self entitled dick.” she said, sliding the signed paper and pen back to the bartender.

Ransom gave a bark of a laugh “I’ll pass thanks.”

Katie snorted and glanced sideways at look at him, scarlet red lips pursed as she eyed him over her glass of bourbon. “Good decision, because I’ve dropped bigger men than you for fun.” “Sure you have Dollface” Ransom quirked an eyebrow, elbow leaning on the bar, angling his body towards her. She kept hers facing forwards, arms resting on the bar top, her head shaking slightly.

“You have no fucking idea who I am do you?” Katie shook her head, not looking at the prick stood next to her. She hated using that line, but, well, when the occasion arose to get one over on a weasely little shit like this, she wasn’t going to pass it up.

“Why should I?” he snorted “I don’t know all the little bitches in Boston.”

She felt her mouth drop open and she was about to retaliate when Steve gently appeared by her side, dropping her cardigan over her shoulders.

Ransom recognised him straight away. He’d had it quite often, been told he looked similar to Captain America. So this meant the woman he’d been baiting for the last 5 minutes was his wife, Katie Rogers, sister of Billionaire Tony Stark, the Avenger, Supernova.

He’d called Supernova a hooker.

Ransom looked into his glass of scotch, turning away back to the bar, snorting with laughter.

“Sorry baby, Sam called and…” Steve stopped, frowning at the look on Katie’s face. “You ok?”

“Fine.” she said, looking up at him, smiling and nodding towards a cosy sofa over at the other side of the bar. “You wanna go sit down over there?”

“Sure.” he said, picking up his glass of bourbon he held out his free hand for her and she jumped down off the stool.

“I’d like to say it’s been a pleasure.” She snarked to the man next to her “But I don’t lie so…”

Steve frowned, wondering what had gone down whilst he’d been away. He glanced at his wife and then turned to look at the guy that was sat on the stool next to where Katie had been to see if he recognised him and did a double take. He recognised him alright, but only because he looked incredibly like him. Granted, there were a few subtle differences, but the resemblance was uncanny, to the point that at a first glance in the street, you could be fooled.

“Pal, you should keep that bitch on a leash.” Ransom spoke, his eyebrows raising and in front of him Steve stiffened.

“What did you just say?” he frowned, pulling himself up to full height.

“Seriously, man. You save the world from Nazi’s, get frozen for 70 years and then end up marrying that.” Ransom smirked, enjoying baiting the Captain “I’d ask ‘em to put you back under…”

Steve’s nostrils flared and he felt his neck getting warmer. “Don’t you dare talk about my wife like that...”

“Steve, leave it, come on.” Katie said gently, patting Steve on the chest “The guy’s a complete ass hole. If brains were dynamite I doubt he’d have enough to blow his head off.”

“Well if we’re talking about blowing...” Ransom looked Katie up and down before locking onto her eyes. “You up for the job?

Katie let out a bark of a laugh, her hand still on Steve’s chest which was positively humming with anger as she turned to face Ransom, contempt etched across every single inch of her face.

“Go jerk yourself off and wipe it on a curtain like your father should have done with you.” she said.

“I’d rather wipe it in your hair.” came the quip back.

And that was it. That was the point that Steve Rogers snapped.

There was a loud smash, the glass he was holding shattered in his grip as his fist contracted in pure anger. Katie barely had time to realise what had happened before he had stepped forward and grabbed Ransom by the front of his shirt, lifting him and slamming him on the bar.

“Steve!” she said, pulling on his arm. “Baby he really isn’t worth it, let go!”

“Captain Rogers!” Will behind the bar was desperately trying to talk him down as well “Please, don’t make me call security.”

Security! Steve wanted to snort. Like that would do any good.

“Baby, come on…” Katie tried again, pleading to his reasonable side. “Look, we’ve had such a nice night. Don’t let him ruin it.”

Steve let out a deep breath, he wanted nothing more than to knock the asshole’s teeth down his throat, but he felt Katie’s touch on his arm and her pleading tone and he let go, shoving the man hard.

“I would tell you to apologise.” Steve snarled stepping back. His voice was steely, eyes carrying none of their usual warmth “But I suspect it’s pointless”

“Yup.” Ransom nodded “Totally pointless.”

“Like your existence.” Katie mumbled, Ransom snorting in response. “Look, Drysdale, my manager’s told you before.” Will said, his voice laced with vexation as he shuffled from behind the bar to sweep up the glass that Steve had shattered. “Any more trouble and you’re gonna be banned.”

Ransom’s nostrils flashed angrily as he looked at the man “’I’m gonna be banned? Eat shit, he’s the one that just attacked me! He ripped my shirt!” he gestured down to where Steve had grabbed him, two tears either side of the buttons of his shirt “This is a Fendi!”

“Ransom, just shut up and apologise.” Will pressed again, “Or you’re gonna have to leave.”

“Fuck this, I was going anyway.” Ransom snarled, knocking back his drink. He stood up and pulled on a long, tan coloured camel coat before he glared at Steve then Katie “Really bad smell in here.”

Katie rolled her eyes, deciding to let him have that childish one without any fuss. But Steve didn’t.

“Close the door on your way out.” He watched as the man stopped, took a deep breath before angrily flinging the door open, his coat flapping behind him. There was a moment’s pause before it slammed shut.

“Sorry.” Steve turned, apologising to Will.

“He’s a dirt bag and a cretin.” Will shrugged, as he waved the apology off. “No redeeming features whatsoever. Well, none that I’ve seen and trust me, I’ve seen him a hell of a lot.”

“Is your hand ok?” Katie asked Steve gently. She turned his right hand over to see that there were no cuts at all from the glass, which was good.

“Yeah, fine, don’t worry.” Steve looked at her, frowning. “Honey, what on Earth just happened?” he asked her softly, as she took a deep breath, blowing it out of her mouth.

“I went to the bathroom and when I came back, well, I thought he was was you from behind so gave him a hug.” she shook her head “Soon as I touched him I realised I was very, very wrong. I tried to apologise and he called me a hooker.”

“A hooker?” Steve repeated, arching an eyebrow.

“Yeah, so I told him even if I was he wouldn’t be able to afford me.”

At that Will, who had been busy pouring them both another drink, laughed as he slid 2 short tumblers of bourbon back over to them. “He won’t have liked that at all.”

Steve nodded his thanks to the man as Katie looked at him. “How come?” she asked.

“Well, Ransom’s mother likes to claim she’s a self-made millionaire. Fails to mention the million dollar loan her dad gave her to start up her business like, but that’s by the by. Simply put, his family one way or another are loaded, and Ransom likes to be the flash bastard if you get what I mean.”

“What do his family do?” Katie asked, “I’ve never even heard of the Drysdales, and I’m pretty well connected…”

“His mother and father run some real Estate Company.” Will shrugged, “A local one round Massachusetts, but you’ll have heard of his grandfather, or if you haven’t you’ve been living under a rock for the last 20 years.” “Who?” she asked.

“Harlan Thrombey, the crime fiction author.” Will said, and Katie felt the colour drain from her face. She turned to look at Steve whose eyes had also widened, and she gave a groan.

“Shit.”

@the-omni-princess @momobaby227 @geekofmanythings16 @angelofhell-666 @thewackywriter @marvelfansworld @cobalt-gear @asgardlover75 @jennmurawski13 @jtargaryen18 @saiyanprincessswanie @navispalace @patzammit @joannaliceevans-fanficblog @icanfeelastormbrewing @djeniiscorner @ayamenimthiriel @coldmuffinbanditshoe @disneylovingal @madzmilllz @sgtjaamesbaarnes @sweater-daddiesdumbdork

#stark spangled banner #knives out #steve rogers x original female character #steve rogers x oc #steve rogers #captain america #tony stark #iron man #ransom drysdale #mcu #mcu fanfiction #marvel #marvel fanfiction #avengers #avengers fanfiction #cross over #americas asshole #americas ass

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annakie · 4 years

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Am I once again posting about the Voyager Relaunch Novels? Yes. Yes I am.

I am re-reading the Post-Endgame Voyager Relaunch novels and marathoned reading The Eternal Tide over the last two nights and all I have to say is Janeway and Chakotay love each other so much, I was literally sobbing through about six sections of the second half of that book.

The Kirsten Beyer books are SO GOOD. And as I’m re-reading them I love how she handles every single one of the Voyager characters but especially Chakotay. I feel like she understands Chakotay and gives him everything the writers of Voyager never quite grasped about his character in seven seasons. Full Circle is such a powerful story of his love and his grief, and the rest of the crew’s love for him (especially Tom, B’lanna, Harry and Sev-- wow his friendship with Seven is so awesome throughout the Beyer books, everything it should have been in the show and not what we got in Endgame. The support they have for each other without forcing a cringey relationship back onto them adds so much to BOTH of their characters. Hey this paragraph went way off the rails but I don’t care.)

Anyway I really love the plots of each of these books, I love how they handle EVERY character (well, I miss Tuvok -- at some point I’m gonna get to the Titan novels) and the new characters are pretty great (oh man Cambridge is a fave, and so much better than the new consular that was introduced in the Spirit Walk books. Loved Eden, love Farkas.)

I made a post a few days ago about how Chakotay is the whole “upstanding, solid, good guy” archetype that some people dare to call “boring” I’ve previously talked at length in a post about Mass Effect about how that’s just... my favorite kind of character. And Chakotay is just... so that. It also made me realize that the Janeway / Chakotay dynamic is also very similar to a Shepard / Kaidan dynamic (powerful commanding officer of her own ship woman character, solid, good, honorable mature right-hand man first officer (or close to it) male character and maybe that’s why they’re both two of my favorite ships.

Anwyay here’s some spoilery thoughts about The Eternal Tide.

Chakotay telling Seven about his relationship with Janeway evolving before she died, and how he doesn’t think he’ll ever love any other woman!

Confirmation that Chakotay was thinking about proposing when they were supposed to met in Venice!??! What!?

Janeway thinking about Chakotay right after her resurrection and how deeply she feels for him and wondering about how her death affected him! Also I kind of love that Chakotay DIDN’T come to her mind when deciding whether to return to life or not? This was her decision and making it about A Man I think would have made it feel less about her and how she knew she would be taking responsibility for The Multiverse, which is what it absolutely should have been about. Realizing what her death would have done to him basically the second she was alive again... that part was so well written. I loved it. Her relationship shouldn’t become the basis of who she is -- but it adds to her.

Their... reunion... scene... almost being ruined by Q... Chakotay’s utter shock and disbelief and the description of him slowly beginning to have his heart open up to the possibility, him inching closer to her as she’s thinking that maybe she’s made a mistake and understands just how deeply her death hurt him... that.... entire... SCENE. (Actually about once a year I dig that book and Full Circle out just to read their getting together / reunion scenes.)

Getting Seven’s reaction to Janeway was also very, very good. I wish they hadn’t cut past the scene where the rest of the Voyager staff sees her for the first time but we did get a little taste of it.

Um okay and then Janeway tells Chakotay she loves him for the first time and he says it back, naturally but like, this is as Chakotay was preparing to go on a suicide mission? SOBBING. They didn’t even get a day together, but at least they got to say goodbye this time.

Janeway forcing herself not to think about Chakotay’s death because things just got so much more dire.

Yes they won, but Janeway all alone on the battle bridge and she can’t even bring herself to contact Voyager yet because she just needs time to mourn Chakotay for a few seconds and takes a few seconds, a few breaths, a few moments... and then... OMG.... Chakotay is returned by Godson Q just before his death and they’re so happy... I CANNOT.

THE EPILOGUE where they’re in bed and had spent every possible moment together and so casual and free and happy together... it’s everything we ever wanted for seven seasons and seven more books.

Oh I started this post now almost a week ago and now I’m a few books forward and hey am I now going to talk about Protectors? Yes, yes I am.

J/C don’t get to spend a lot of time together in this book. Janeway gets sent back to the Alpha Quadrant to undergo counseling and evaluation which, tbh, is totally valid considering she DIED A VIOLENT HORRIBLE DEATH and then WAS DEAD FOR FOURTEEN MONTHS and then you know RESURRECTED AND IMMEDIATELY HAD TO SAVE THE MULTIVERSE oh yeah not to mention WAS REUNITED WITH THEN HAD TO TELL CHAKOTAY GOODBYE FOREVER A FEW HOURS LATER then oh wait THE MAN SHE LOVES WAS ALSO BROUGHT BACK FROM THE DEAD (or the brink of death, whatever.)

There’s a short and sweet goodbye scene then for the bulk of the book Janeway is back on Earth going to counseling (which, that second counseling scene was so great, and seeing her slow down and enjoy life with her mother was so great, and um also that scene with her and Picard? Wow. Just Wow. Also I can’t wait to go back and read some TNG books because I need to see JL/B actually get together.) And the entire time she’s just like... not even doubting her relationship with Chakotay even a little. She thinks of him and is excited to be reunited but every time it’s like “the man I love” “The person I plan on spending the rest of my life with” and even “the love of my life.” WOW. Just Wow. Chakotay worries a bit but never doubts.

Oh and then she basically tells her commanding officer “yeah um, thanks but I absolutely have no plans on curbing my relationship with Chakotay to make you feel more comfortable. Also JL/B and Riker/Troi are all married so fuck you?” She does agree to keep separate quarters on another ship which is like.. fine... whatever. But also her going “Yes he’s my subordinate but we’re not going to let that affect our working relationship, we’re adults.” Fuck. Yeah. Montgomery asks if they’re gonna get married and Janeway is all “IDK, probably? We’ll let you know.”

And B’Elanna asks Chakotay the same thing and his answer is also basically “Yeah at some point, we haven’t talked about it yet but yeah we’re spending the rest of our lives together now stop prodding me.”

Their reunion when she returns doesn’t go as planned and it’s a teensy bit worrisome at the end but with notes of positivity.

OK I’m only about 1/3rd into Acts of Contrition but I got to a part last night that made me put the book down for a minute and thank Kirsten Beyer out loud.

J/C finally get to spend some time alone several days after she makes it back to the fleet in the Delta Quadrant. They have a brief discussion about The Plot, then Chakotay is like “Know what? We’ll talk about The Plot Stuff tomorrow in the briefing. Let’s instead talk about us.” And then he stands up for what he wants! And Janeway listens, and they talk, and agree! And then Chakotay is like “Okay, now I really want to hear about what happened to you back on Earth for all those weeks!” So... literally they just... sit and talk for several hours like, I don’t know, real people would? There’s no drama! And they both affirm their commitment to each other and their relationship!

It’s just... it’s... so good? Their relationship is so solid! They LOVE EACH OTHER and it’s based on their solid friendship (something else they actually say out loud!) and they talk to each other and there’s no like drama for drama’s sake about their relationship so far and it’s like, better than even any fanfic I’ve ever read (and there’s some great fic out there for these two) because nearly every other character is also getting their screentime and character development (minus Tuvok -- who’s off with Riker and Troi on the Titan and Neelix isn’t around much -- though he’s spoken of and we see him a bit when they visit New Talax). Also it’s... beta canon. No matter what, this is real and accepted beta canon.

I have been going back and listening to all the episodes of the Literary Trek podcast episodes about these books, and for Eternal Tide and Protectors Beyer herself was on the podcast and listening to her talk about Chakotay and Janeway both individually and as a couple her love for them both is clear, she loves the show and knows what she’s doing and is allowed to do it, and her writing is so damn good. One of the hosts of the podcast has said in several episodes that he used to really dislike Chakotay as he was in the show and now book Chakotay is one of his favorite characters. And honestly? I do love show Chakotay but book Chakotay is... everything show Chakotay should have been. But he’s also been through hell and back and I love how Beyer used that experience -- and now Janeway’s resurrection experience -- to advance them BOTH individually and how that’s affected them as a couple now that they actually get to be that.

There’s so much other good in these books. Tom and B’Elanna’s storyline and the way she writes them and their marriage... I could write so much about it. Harry gets better characterization! A plotline! A promotion! A love interest that may actually work out?!!? We’ll see. And SEVEN. Wow. So much happens with Seven and it’s so great, I love her so much and Book Seven is again, even better.

Two more books have come out since the last time I read the series and the final book comes out next month, I can’t wait to see all the great moments Beyer has coming up for them. It also makes me twice as happy that Beyer is so involved with Picard. It’s so clear the love she has for these two and I can’t imagine J/C not still being Alpha canon with her involved.

#star trek #voyager #janeway x chakotay #kathryn janeway #chakotay #Kirsten beyer #annakie's misc stuff

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nny11writes · 4 years

Note

For the fic writer ask game: What’s a trope that you’d like to never hear about as long as you live, let alone write? (Feel free to rant :) )

Hahahaha, sorry were you looking for one trope?

I’m usually so positive so now you’ve done it. You’ve unlocked me complaining about random shit that doesn’t usually matter. Because the damn busted wide the fuck open! Okay, so I’m going to approach this as outside of smut fics with intense kinks I can’t stand (vore, foot fetish, scat play, etc), because that’s me getting squicked and/or triggered and not just tropes that I wish would die in a fire.

My only disclaimer up front is that if you love most of these (hopefully it’ll be obvious which ones I will not forgive/excuse you from), that’s awesome! Go for it! Read it, write it, print it out to loving re-read and paste on the walls! Fandom is, in large part, about finding your niche and enjoying what you enjoy pretty much shamelessly. So I’m not passing judgement on anyone who enjoys reading or writing (most of) these.

CW: rape, sexual assault Also I’ve had a shit few days, so if you don’t want to read someone just being negative and bitching this is probably not the post for you friend. But it all below a cut so people can avoid!

Crossover Fics/Rule 50

My main gripe with this is that without fail a series I love get crossed over with a fandom I either don’t care about or hate. Every time I’ve tried to force myself to read one it’s never worked out for me. Sometimes fics aren’t properly tagged and I’m getting into the setting only for other characters from another fandom to suddenly show up and literally I instantly loose interest. The closest I got to writing a crossover fic, was on FF.net where I had all the characters I wrote for “talking to me” when I hit a big wall of writer’s block in the hopes that writing something so different and strange for me would help. It didn’t. It was interesting for 0.2 seconds to wonder how characters would interact, but then I instantly lost interest because I end up leaning so heavily of character tropes to make it work which, for me, isn’t fun to read or write.

Like, just write fusion! I like fusion! I’m currently writing a SPOP-SW fusion! It allows me to play with characters in a fun world that I already understand, but without the frustration of characters becoming more 2D or very OOC (or both) to force them to interact with one another. Rage Fics

Honestly? If you write and post rage fics, fuck you. Full stop. Fuck you.

I’m about to tangent, but I swear it’s related. This is the equivalent of someone tagging a character or ship or fandom they hate in a post bashing them or blasting them to hell and back. Fucking beyond rude and obnoxious. That’s what rage fics are cranked up to 11. You are 100% allowed to hate on fandom/character/ship/trope/whatever the fuck, but when you do that shit you are forcing people who enjoy the media to see/interact with your BS because you fucking tagged it to show up where we are. A great example here in SPOP is Catra. I love her! I understand why some people don’t, and they’re 100% allowed to hate her and resent that so many people like her. Recently I went to the Catra tag to find art and fic, maybe some of the top notch meta this fandom puts out if I was lucky, and got stuck seeing post after post after meta post comparing her to another character in the show to explain why she’s an awful person, badly written character, and anyone who likes her (but didn’t like the poster’s fave) was an idiot/asshole/troll/bitch/dumbass and you know what? I went from having a decent time decompressing after a shitty day at work to getting fucking sent around the sun with stress. Like, bro, I’m here to ENJOY myself thanks, and when you tag things I go to for fun and fluff when I’m out of spoons and ready to snap to ranting about hating it, you make me want to scream.

Y’all don’t know how many people are lucky that I write up responses in word so I can get it out of my system and then just DELETE the whole fucking thing. Rage fic is that same fucking set up, but instead of being a relatively quick post (where I can block the poster here on tumblr), it’s a fanfic that people are going to continue to click into over and over and over again for fun only to get body slammed. There’s no way to warn people on AO3 if something is a rage fic beyond not leaving a kudos and dropping a comment. I don’t know a lot of people who read comments first so it doesn’t always work.

If you post rage fics, grow up. Stop that shit. Fuck you. Instead, try not purposefully interacting with fandom that makes you so mad that you think doing this is an appropriate reaction. Block tags, block users, regulate comments, go whole fucking hog. You should be able to enjoy fandom too! But if you can’t do that without tearing down other people in fandom then you make me want to beat you over the head until you self-isolate to play by yourself in a different sandbox. Seriously. Fuck you if you do this.

Troll Fics

Did you think I came on strong for rage fics? This is worse.

If you do this? Fuck you. You get NOTHING but my pure rage and if I find this shit I will report you however I can and then shout from the rooftops about it. And I’m sure if you do write troll fics because you enjoy being purposefully offensive and triggering then you’re probably delighted that my reaction to just thinking about this is wishing I had the power to fuck up your life.

Like, the ONLY thing I can say for rage fic is that at least typically the person writing it actually enjoys some aspect of the fandom or fandom in general.

Troll fics are just meant to be offensive on purpose and if you write and post that you’re a bad person. No exceptions. You can make different choices and work to become a better person or a good person, but right now, right this second as you do it? You’re a bad person. You should probably figure out why you get so much joy out of posting things with the sole purpose of hurting/triggering/being cruel to others. And you might need help to do that. I legit think you should reach out to people with different opinions from your own to try and break out of it. Get a therapist. Do fucking something worthwhile, because posting troll fics is not worth anyone’s while. Fuck you. Rape as a Backstory

I hope I don’t have to fucking explain why this makes me want to literally explode. I’m purposefully not writing that as R*pe so that people with rape tagged don’t see this.

If you think that rape is the only way to push your story forward or is a great way to give a character “free and easy trauma”, literally stop. Just. Fucking. Stop. There are other ways. Really look at your work, really think about /why/ it’s so important to you that the character /has/ to be raped. Most of the time the real answer is you don’t have a reason you just chose it because you either don’t care, think it’s not a big deal, or never considered other possibilities. There are stories where rape does need to be included, stories that address the topic kindly and/or tag appropriately for it. I’ve read some of these that were really amazing, both short (<1k) and long (>100k) because the author actually took a hot second to address the topic in an intelligent way. Whether that was to dive into how it’s harmful, address their own trauma, or (honestly) even for the smut porn of it but with all the proper tags on it. If you have it to be purely enjoyed by yourself and/or others with dubcon or noncon kinks, cool, good for you, TAG IT APPROPRIATELY. Fucking bless writers who still use “Dead Dove/Do Not Eat” tags y’all are doing great work. But the vast majority using this trope?

They aren’t that, they aren’t anything like that at all, they aren’t always tagged correctly or at all and that’s by design, it’s often for shock value or a quick ‘well that’s why they’re anti-social’, it’s sometimes used as an excuse for one character to swear off sex until the “right person” comes along to “cure them”, and they shouldn’t have ever been posted.

Redemption Equals Sex/Sexual Karma

I know this is spring boarding a bit, but please stop writing these two tropes.

I’m exhausted y’all. And not just because I’m asexual. This trope is disgusting and usually comes with heaps of sexism, racism, and homophobia. If you want to write smut please just write the fucking smut. I’m literally posting smut fic and am planning to work on another one tonight! JUST WRITE SMUT WITHOUT MAKING IT DISGUSTINGLY ANTI-MINORITY GROUPS AND PLAYING INTO HARMFUL STEREOTYPES. If bad guys become good(ish) guys because a woman saw past their barriers, took care of them, are a surrogate mother, and then had wild and kinky sex with them then it’s a bad fic. Likewise, if a character is punished for having sex, or is sexually assaulted to show that they’re now bad then it’s a bad fic.

If a character’s suffering is rewarded with sex to “cure” them and “make them better” then it’s a bad fic.

There are so many ways that this shit becomes a seriously harmful fic.

Please. Please, stop doing this. I am on my knees. Stop!

I am sick of ‘Draco’s in Leather Pants’ (can’t fucking believe I’m whipping that term out again holy shit what year is it) getting redeemed because they slept with someone and now found a reason to care. Sex leading someone on the path towards redemption is so EXTREMELY rarely handled in a way that’s well done. Just. Don’t. Be an unapologetic villain lover, slap them in an AU where they aren’t a pure villain, but don’t do this. Like I wrote above, I’m also just sick of (usually, but not always) dudes who put rape in to punish (usually, but not always) female characters or to punish weak/pushover characters (usually, but not always males). And equally tired of traumatized characters “casting off their shackles” to enjoy wild and kinky sex because someone with a magic dick/strap/fingers/tongue “showed them it’s okay” and “made it all better”.

Just, don’t. Be a fucking decent human being and don’t.

Character/Reader Fics

I...I really just don’t get this? It’s very uncomfortable to me and I’m assuming that’s due to me being aroace, I can’t read them and if I try to I either become so uncomfortable I stop or so rage filled I stop.

I don’t mind 2nd person stories, but most of the ones I see are character/reader fics and it’s...like, it’s just bad. Not “cringe” just enjoyable for me. I can’t explain why I hate this so much considering I do enjoy some 2nd person fics. Idk, I really don’t have the words to explain why these bother me so much. :\

I ain’t got an alternative, if you like these you like them, and if you don’t you just don’t. Thank you for tagging so I can avoid. Have fun on your own! Song Fics and/or Audio/Sound Cue Fics

Sorry guys, I just hate it. I can’t really read a fic and listen to music at the same time, it becomes background noise 100% and detracts from both for audio cue fics.

Fuck, just realized I don’t know if people know what those are. Audio/Sound cue fics are fics where you’re reading along and all the sudden there’s a link or URL that you’re supposed to follow to help set up the next scene/enhance it. Hate it. Hate, hate, hate. It detracts from your story and makes it weaker while being annoying and breaking me the reader out of my enjoyment of your story. Hate! Telling me in the A/N that this (or these) are the song(s) you listened to while writing, song(s) you based the story on, or even that you think they’re good songs to get you in the mood for the story is totally okay! I’ll probably ignore it unless I went head over heels for it, in which case I WILL go back and listen to all of them. (Why hello Rhythm and Blues, you punched me in the face and I now listen to every song even vaguely mentioned in the story or A/N, you’re that good, it’s so fucking good guys, I can’t stop talking about this fucking series it’s just so good?????????) Song fics are also typically in this boat for me. And I want to be really clear, not fics where a character is singing in the fic with lyrics written out. That doesn’t bother me, that song is now effectively part of the story and draws me in. But if it’s paragraphs of description before suddenly cutting it’s annoying. Why, oh why, do I put up with this misery? Still looking for a reason For now it is a mystery to me Why, oh why, do I put up with this misery? Still looking for a reason But for now it's ancient history to me

So yeah I’m making an example to complain about the example.

But question.

Was that needed?

All I did was make overly explicit my feelings in this text that was already there in what I’d written. Song fics feel to me like writers who aren’t confident that their writing is good/understandable/relatable and so they are desperately throwing someone else’s creation into their own in the hopes the reader will get it. Friend, I promise you, we’ll get it without the song! The song lyrics detract when they’re just floating out there, and have taken goods fics and made them frustrating. Either that or you think you’re so amazing that your shit don’t stink and the rest of us idiots can choke because of your brilliance. I’ve found several song fics that if I copy and paste them into a word document and delete the song out, I really enjoyed the fic itself on it’s own merits in a way I literally couldn’t with the lyrics in there. Again, if you are weaving music into your fic, weave it in. Have characters sing, write the lyrics out as a character is listening to the music, quote the song in your fic (preferably without it being super obvious. I’m not saying my take on that was the best, but I did write a Catradora fic on giftly request based on a song and I 100% used lyrics from it in my prose and built my whole plot around it without breaking out to quote the song explicitly), just do something that’s not, like, punching me in the face because “clearly I couldn’t get it” or from a fear that “they won’t understand”. At best you seem insecure and unsure about your story, which is fantastic without the song. At worst it seems like you’re saying your fic is so beyond the average reader that we would never understand your vision without someone else’s original content in it.

#cw: rape #tw: rape #negativity #fandom #fandom negativity #me actually complaining about shit explicitly #and I still edited it a lot to make it not rage ranty #my anxiety won't let me live if I don't #about the author #tag game #writing game #writer game #fic game #fanfiction game #oh my god Imma post now otherwise I'm going to dive back in and scream A LOT MORE BECAUSE MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM #bobkitten

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coffeeandcalligraphy · 5 years

Text

Holy Hands | Houses With Teeth Update #2

HOLLA guess who’s back for another writing update!

If the title of this update seems unfamiliar--Houses With Teeth, what? who? when? why?--that’s because the last time I talked about this project on here was the first time, back in July! For a refresher, check out THIS very rambly post where I “intro” the project (very minimally as I had no idea what I was doing).

I still don’t know what I’m doing *exactly* but have made a semi-break through with this project and felt inclined to share. The last I spoke about HOUSES WITH TEETH at length was to vaguely describe what the project was. This book for those who don’t want to read the previous post, is the seventh book in my (very ongoing) series, Fostered. This book comes along five years after writing the first book in the series, after a major writing revolution.

I haven’t shared much about this on this blog because I wasn’t sure how to, but I really struggled with this project. HWT comes as the book after Rewired (book 6), which I finished drafting in March-ish of 2019. From then, until two days ago, I had no idea what I was doing with the series--if I could even continue it, and how I would continue it with all the changes my writing evolution presented. I chose to distract myself/keep busy with Moth Work, a spinoff of this series and my current novel, however, HWT sort of nagged in the back of my mind for many months.

HWT is actually one of the reasons I ended book 6 so hastily! After getting a few ideas for new scenes, I fell in love with the idea of writing my protagonist Reeve in a city by herself, with new people we’d never met before. These rose-coloured glasses worked to my detriment, as the premature idea took over my decision-making process before I could properly understand what I wanted from it.

After the end of Rewired, I thought everything was all fine and dandy! I had a new novel idea set up, ready to be written whenever I wanted. But something unplanned happened--I didn’t end up returning to the project. This is mostly because my desires for the book--whether to write it as a “real” book, or continue it as a semi-disjointed Fostered book (which isn’t shade to my past books, just the tea loool)--started to conflict. Though I started many openings (about 3k words of first scenes), nothing was sticking. I felt like I was misjudging my main character Reeve and making her more of a caricature than she really was. I feared I forgot who she was, and that her story was ending (scary!).

This is where I (recently) found the root of the problem. My mischaracterization of Reeve worked against me, as I’d done exactly what I’d feared doing--misjudging who she was. It had been a long time since I’d written with Reeve, a character I’ve written with since I was thirteen, and though I felt I knew her, I also felt like I’d lost her in translation. While I was back home a few weeks ago, I began re-reading a few passages of book six to get a feel for a character, which helped, but didn’t cause any revelations.

It was only a few days ago, when I helped @sarahkelsiwrites crack the plot of her novel that I felt an itch to try to crack mine as well. I first did this by paging through my (very minimal) notes for the book. This notes document consists basically of only two scene ideas I had that were a few thousand words long. Somehow, re-reading them helped me realize Reeve’s priorities, but most importantly, how much this book focuses on her vulnerabilities. It made me realize the root of her flamboyance toward the end of book six, and where her genuine side resided.

So this leads to the actual update!

Let’s first chat setting, y’all. This was a hard call to make, because I’d initially determined Reeve was going to be in NYC at the start of the book. The problem is, I’m *very bad* at writing real places, especially places I don’t personally know well. The thought of having to engage a five character cast (which seems small, but in a big city where they could be doing other things, feels big), and also have to write in this city accurately made the realism of this book too much for me to handle. I’m all for realism! But I wasn’t prepared for the culture shock that was “welp these books used to take place in an unknown unlocated subway station” to “so this book takes place in a real city”. It made too many things too real for me, the time period included (which is another crisis)! Setting this whole book in NYC overwhelmed me and I knew I wouldn’t do it justice.

The problem is, I’d planned this entire book around NYC. At the start of my initial plan of HWT, Reeve is supposed to live in an apartment above a bakery with two housemates who I’d already sort of gotten to know! I couldn’t just throw all of this away, especially since I’d set Moth Work in a direction toward NYC so everyone could meet up easily. So what did I do? After reading those initial notes I mentioned above, I made it all backstory. ;) And boy! Did this also crack the book open.

This was the first revelation I had with HWT 2.0. Allowing myself to move the book out of this setting, but still have the important parts got me to ask myself why Reeve would move to a big city with a new identity, and oh, did the pot start stirring ITSELF. I then decided to create a smaller town just outside of NYC where I can run amuck, lol. The town’s name is Wicker (for now) which I don’t dislike, though it hasn’t grown on me. I’m very bad at making up town names, and after many attempts, I settled for a very real word?? Lol.

This post is getting long, so I won’t explain the story unless y’all want to know, but I came to the decision that in this town, our fave soft boi Foster would have a nice house and his ideal cottagecore life, and all would be SWELL. Until!! This leads to our very hasty summary:

After escaping a toxic relationship, twenty-year-old Reeve disappears for the second time in one summer. She’s drawn to Wicker, a mealy town outside New York City, whose disappearances of affluent girls has caught her attention. The day she arrives, a sinkhole buries one of them in the front yard of her new home, a fixer-upper she shares with estranged friend, Foster. Quickly she falls prey to speculation by herself and others, who try to connect her to the tragedy. And even stranger, false recognitions as the girl in the ground, and the many other missing Wicker girls make her feel more and more like one of them--these alluring unknown women.

(A huge thanks to @sarahkelsiwrites for literally cracking this book open for me, and for all the conversations we’ve had regarding this project! Literally this book wouldn’t exist without Sarah!)

Now let’s get into the first thing I wrote for HWT 2.0!

Holy Hands is the prologue of Houses With Teeth, and marks a milestone for the first prologue I’ve written!

This prologue was a very impromptu thing. I drafted this a few days ago, and immediately felt something I’ve never felt writing any of the other (many) openings I’ve tested for HWT. It felt very right, but most importantly, I felt like I had Reeve back. It’s very possible for your own characters to hide from you (which is how I felt with Reeve), and though it’s taken very many months for her to really reveal herself to me, I’m so happy I’ve waited because I’ve never been so stoked to write her.

As y’all know, Reeve is a bit of a no-bullshit kinda gal. The last chapter you would’ve seen her in, she was lounging in a motel bathroom drinking margaritas on her own and you know? We love that for her! Except, after that chapter, I couldn't figure out who she wanted to be--the ‘no fucks given’ woman in the bathtub, or the vulnerable, porous person she often was in earlier books. I love no fucks given Reeve, however, I think I got caught up in her no-fucks-givenness that I missed the time she does give fucks (which is! often!). This prologue really opened me up to her, and I feel a closeness to her that I haven’t felt in a long time.

The prologue itself is rather short. It’s about 1300 words pre-edits, and I wrote it in! one! sitting! A phenomenon! We begin as Reeve is getting out of a taxi to enter her new home, AKA her old pal Foster’s house. She invites herself after a horrific encounter that scares her out of NYC and closer to her old pals (who she’s estranged herself from). Reeve outlines first, the disappearances of these affluent girls, and then fixates on Irene, her future housemate, whom Foster describes as many things that summer. Reeve is semi shook by Irene because she’s startlingly pretty and also startlingly looks like?? her?? (Reeve is just into herself? Who knew?)

Excerpts:

Here are a few excerpts from the prologue that I kinda dig! Here is the first paragraph:

Four girls went missing the summer the ground opened up. I was the unofficial fifth. They were girls I knew, in some iteration at least. Girls who wore their hair down, collars up. Anklets from their football boyfriends, like voguish ball-and-chains, pretty lingerie no one would see for at least another decade. Things I’d never worn, but wanted to wear. They were wealthy girls with the kinds of parents who dressed them in tights and midi-skirts, sent them to boarding schools, paid for piano lessons just to display a trophy. Girls with parents who wanted synthetic children. Girls who lusted over the romance of marriage—the ultimate form of female liberation. Girls who cast spells with each other and chose their friends based on zodiac signs, the amounts of vowels in their names. Girls who kissed each other in secret and stayed missing until they wanted to be found. None of them knew me.

This is a description of Wicker (CW: a bit of a gory descriptor):

That summer was pallid and bitter. Wicker sat in a valley an hour outside of New York City, and rarely caught sunshine. The locals explained it had always been like this—anemic, unexciting. Women came here to raise quieter children, and those quiet children threw stones at each other’s eyes to see who’d go blind first. The first one who did was found floating face-down in the creek behind the church and the women and children left hastily. It worked in waves like this: people coming, people going. Wicker was empty and both full—of the dead, and alive. I’d chosen it for this reason.

Here’s an excerpt that comes right after the previous (all of these actually make up the first three paragraphs lol, TW: eating disorders):

The cabbie I’d given the last of my savings to took my bag out of his car trunk and walked it up to the house. It was one of the few nice days in Wicker, one of the last while I was there. Sunshine slit my face in two as I watched myself in the cab’s reflection. I reached for my cigarettes and realized too late that I’d left them back at the apartment. That summer, I was the thinnest I’d been. The hollow ache of me more of a victory than a loss. I know why I stopped eating in those first two weeks, why every meal Foster would later serve me in that house felt cryptic, and it had something to do with the body they never fully recovered. I wasn’t hungry when I’d gotten to Wicker; I wasn’t hungry for a long time after.

Some Foster gentleness (I missed him!):

Chickadees chattered in the birdfeeder Foster had set up a week earlier. Though I hadn’t been on the road long, the drive had exhausted me. The midafternoon clouds pilled, hardly overcast, something I’d come to miss when the sun stopped coming. He hadn’t invited me to live with him, but didn’t object when I called to say I’d be coming up. It was the first I’d spoken to anyone who knew me as Reeve and not Evie in half a year. That day, he greeted me from the porch and took my single carry-on from the cabbie with a boyish thank you. It was one of the last times I’d see him wear it—his bashful gentleness, like he always felt the need to apologize even when everything was brilliant.

Here’s an intro of Irene, where the chapter title comes from:

Irene sat at the kitchen table inside the house. I caught her in glances through the doorway. The first thing I thought was that she’d look better as a blonde. A small thing who held her mug like she was holding a holy object. I’d later be haunted by those hands when I remembered how they looked by the time she was partly pulled up. Foster described her as many things to him over the course of that summer: a housemate, a partner, a friend, sometimes just a person he knew. She was reading something, something French—I could hear her reciting parts of it, at times loudly, like she knew she had an audience, at times at just a whisper, the most personal parts, I later found. I’d translate the line I’d heard most prominently later: Don’t let the house consume you.

“Cigarettes?” I said to the cab driver as he was nestling back into his car. When he didn’t hear me, I knocked on his window. The sound of it made Irene’s head bob to attention, though only for a moment. “Cigarettes?” I mimed smoking one when he only blinked at me. We spoke minimally on the drive up, though I learned more about him just by looking. Two daughters, their pictures pasted neatly on the dash. Candy coloured flyers for take-out restaurants jittering against the AC’s shutter. In all that time, I hadn’t learned his name.

When he rolled up the window, I had to jump back so my nose didn’t get clipped. The sun shifted through the glass in wisps, like cobwebs, and my face disintegrating from the surface of the glass was the last thing I saw before he zipped away.

I was surprised to see Irene standing on the porch next to Foster when I looked up. My cheeks warmed. The cabbie’s drive-off had embarrassed me, and I realized how I looked to her, a woman I didn’t know, that I already wanted to know. A bit pathetic. Frazzled. A city person who couldn’t navigate a city. A weak woman—already needing a fix on her first day of a new life.

“I’m quitting,” I said, even though she hadn’t said anything. In the sunshine, she was prettier than I wanted her to be. Her hair hip-length, a length I’d always been too impatient to achieve. Wearing a camisole and a midi-skirt. Pearls in her ears, like the others wore. In New York City, she would’ve been plain to me. The kind of girl I would’ve marked up with a pen in a magazine. Outlining her hips as to say they weren’t good enough, squiggling over her eyebrows because her face was too pretty for a body so average. It wasn’t long after she was gone that I became mistaken for her.

And here’s a bit from the very end of the chapter:

The ground opened like a cracked egg, so slow at first, I didn’t notice. Some say she pushed me. Others say it was the other way around. It melted under us, and one minute I was thinking about how embarrassing I was, how crude it was to still be addicted to cigarettes, and the next, there was a belly in the ground and Irene was somewhere in it. Her dark hair wisping around her, like a tornado. How I thought she’d look better as a blonde. Holy hands, camisole, midi-skirt, pearls in her ears. This was all I’d ever know of Irene. A body was found the summer the ground opened up. I still don’t know exactly who she was.

So that’s it for now y’all! Obviously lots of stuff is subject to change, but I’m finally feeling confident with this path (if I scrap all of this you will know lol)! I’m very excited for this book, and hope to take some more notes on it soon to see where it will go. For now, I’ve got an idea for the first chapter I can play around with, but I hope y’all enjoyed this little piece so far!

--Rachel

#writing #amwriting #writeblr #writingupdates #fostered #houseswithteeth

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justallamaimaginingthings · 5 years

Text

Goodbye [Jorah Mormont x Reader]

Request: "Because the finale made me angsty could u do a jon snow or Jorah Mormont x reader that takes place during ep. 3 and the reader is killed and then turned into a wight and they are forced to fight her? Maybe they don’t know she is dead until they see her turned?" by anonymous

"22 with jorah? My heart is broken" by anonymous

A/n: Stress is making me an absolute bitch, so I thought you should all suffer with me. Please enjoy the angst. Plus, I feel like I've been only writing for Jorah these days and even though he's one of my faves, the next ones will be about Jon (will probably also write this one about him too), Oberyn, Jaqen and more.

Prompt: 22: "This isn't goodbye"

Words: 2000ish || GoT Masterlist

His reason

That’s what you were for Jorah, the reason why he stayed strong through everything, the reason why he kept trying even in the darkest of times, the reason why he carried on. If it weren’t for you he would have given up long ago but you were what kept him standing, his anchor and his light in the darkness. He couldn’t imagine a life without you by his side and that’s why he insisted so much on the fact that you shouldn’t fight in the Battle of Winterfell.

“I can take care of myself” you argued stubbornly and even though Jorah knew that to be a fact, it wasn’t enough to ease his worry. Having seen you risk your life multiple times since the two of you met, Jorah knew that sometimes your bravery overcame logic, getting into dangerous situations without hesitation in order to do what was right. And even though he admired your sense your courage and determination, your recklessness had pushed him to become more protective towards you.

“Y/n, this is an enemy unlike any other we’ve ever faced before. This is death” he pleaded and you had never seen such a desperate look on his face. It was a battle you were probably going to lose and you both knew it, but you would certainly fight it. The Starks had never been the ones to give up, after all, and neither were you.

“Jorah there is no way in seven hells I’ll stay in a crypt while you and every other person I know and love fight against the dead. I need to do this” you insisted. Truth was you’d never forgive yourself if something happened to him and you hadn’t been there. A long time ago you had made a promise and you were determined to keep it. Jorah had known you would not give up easily, just like you had never done so in the past. He couldn't help hoping this time would be different though.

And it was at this moment the horns of Winterfell rang.

“Please” he begged framing your face with both his hands.

“Fear not, my love for this isn’t goodbye, I promise” you replied pulling him into a fervent kiss. Jorah's fear and worry was evident as his grip on your waist was tighter than ever, holding you close to his chest as he tried to put all his feeling into the kiss.

If there was one thing you took pride in that was being a person of your word. Not a single one of the promises you had ever given were broken, even the smallest and more insignificant ones. And out of all, this one turned out to be the one you wouldn’t be able to keep. The moment you saw the wights surrounding Daenerys, you knew there was no possible way you’d come out of this alive.

“I’m sorry” you whispered shooting a sorrowful look towards the castle of Winterfell, knowing Jorah was somewhere in there fighting for his life. Quickly turning your eyes away, the grip on your sword tightened to the point where your knuckles turned white as you ran towards your Queen. Cutting and slicing through the undead you made your way towards her just in time to cut off the hand that was extending towards her hair.

“Y/n?” She asked in a trembling voice.

“Stay behind me. We just have to make it to the walls” you yelled in order to be heard through the cries of the battle. She nodded before surprising the both of you by picking up a fallen sword. Looking at her, you gave the most reassuring smile you could muster. By that time a bunch of wights had gathered around you and it seemed like each one you killed was replaced by two more. Soon you were so tired you could barely hold your sword in your hands, but you refused to give up even after having taken multiple hits.

By the time Drogon flew above you, grabbing Daenerys in his wing and helping her ride him, you were a bleeding wreck. Your hands were shaking in exhaustion and the slightest action caused an immense wave of pain course through your body. Drogon turned around in the sky, heading back to your aid and for a second you believed that maybe there was a way out. That was your mistake, hope. A wight took advantage of your distraction and kicked you to the ground. Your sword fell out of your hand and by the time you grabbed it, four of the undead creatures had gathered around you.

The last thing you remember was Danny's heart wrenching outcry as a cold piece of metal pierced through your chest.

Since the moment Jorah had lost sight of you, a dreadful feeling of fear had taken its place in the back of his mind only getting stronger as time went by and upon hearing Drogon's sorrowful shriek he realized something had actually happened. The newfound sense of horror sent another wave of adrenaline through his veins as he sliced his way through wights. However, there seemed to be a never ending number of creatures rushing into the castle to replace the ones they managed to kill.

Jorah's face was covered in cuts and bruises and every muscle in his body ached in exhaustion as he fought off as many of the creatures as possible with only one thought burning through his mind. He needed to know you were fine because of you didn't make it nothing of this would matter. Looking around he had the chance to observe the absolute hell that was taking place around him. There was almost no hint of light, forcing the soldiers to fight in near darkness and the sound of metal clashing against metal was deafening, mixing with the pained cries of the injured to create an atrocious symphony.

The situation was already turning out to be increasingly tough for the living when the first bodies began rising. Everywhere he looked there was a hauntingly pale pair of emotionless eyes staring back at him as every one of the fallen was resurrected. The scene seemed to be taken out of a nightmare as Jorah was forced to turn against his own friends and allies, killing people he had seen and talked to less than hours ago. Despite knowing those he once knew were long gone, each time his sword hurt one of them something deep inside him shattered.

But fate's cruelest turn was yet to be revealed.

The sight Jorah was faced with when he turned around was one that actually broke him. Your once beautiful and warm eyes had turned pale blue, completely void of emotion as you turned to look at him without showing any signs of recognizing who he was. Jorah couldn't bring himself to step back as your familiar figure headed towards him. Stepping out of the shadows, a ray of light shone on your body allowing Jorah to see the massive blood stain covering your whole chest.

"No…" he whispered trying to tear his eyes off you. No, this wasn't you, his Y/n was long gone and standing in front of him was a sadistic joke fate was playing on him. An inhuman growl passed through your lips causing Jorah's blood to turn to ice. The same soft and sweet pair of lips he would never get enough of.

As your form moved closer, Jorah was barely enough to step back so that he could avoid your sword swinging at him. Taking another step back, his back hit the wall as his heart sank in his chest. There was only one way out of this but the man couldn't even bear the thought of what he had to do. Jorah's heart clenched in agony as he observed you for what he knew to be the last time. You were the same person he had loved and at the same time something completely different. The stance of your body was cold and unnatural and it no longer radiated the kindness and passion it used to. That was only a puppet wearing your features.

Your sword landed inches away from his face, managing to deliver a small cut on his cheek but he was too numb to notice the drops of blood making their way down his face resembling bloody tears. Managing to pick up the sword once more another hit was about to be blown when Jorah's sword plunged right into your once beating heart causing your body to drop down.

"Forgive me, my love" Jorah's quivering voice whispered as he caught your already cold body before it hit the ground, falling into his knees in the process "Forgive me" he repeated before breaking down in tears as strangled sobs escaped him. At that moment Jorah could feel his heart collapsing into his chest as it was replaced by an empty cold feeling. Leaning his head on your shoulder he allowed himself to break down as he hugged you close.

How he hoped to feel your arms wrap around him and hear your sweet voice reassuring him it was all going to be fine, to be able to kiss your lips and see the smile that made him forget about the world. Playing back your last conversation, your words replayed in his mind. This isn't goodbye, you had promised and what a bittersweet irony that was. In some way this was his fault. If he had convinced you to stay back, if he had kept you next to him during the battle, if…

But it was too late. You were gone and there was nothing he could do to get you back. Jorah's grief was so overwhelming he didn't notice when the dead started collapsing around him. Either way, it didn't matter anymore. Even if he lived, Jorah knew his heart died that night and nothing would ever be the same.

He didn’t know how much time had passed until the tears stopped and he just sank down, unable to weep anymore. Refusing to let go of you, he stayed there brushing away the strands of hair the wind blew into your face. He didn't acknowledge the cold that creeped into his armor for the cold he felt in his soul was much more dangerous, already eating away at him.

It was almost dawn when Grey Worm found him standing next to your body with a devastated look on his eyes as despair and anguish were written all over his face. Jorah resisted any attempts to be taken away from you, not ready for it to be the last time he laid eyes on you. It took three Unsullied to finally carry him away.

After that everything seemed unreal. Daenerys and many others offered their regrets but it was like words had lost their meaning. Jorah felt nothing but a gaping void increasingly growing in his chest. The next day went by without him realizing it when he was given a torch and led right outside the walls of Winterfell.

Seeing your body lay on top of the wooden pile a sickly sense of heartache dominated his heart and soul once more. By the time he reached next to your body, tears were blurring his vision as he took a deep breath in a failed attempt to regain his composure. It was the last time he'd ever see you and there were millions of things he wanted to say forming a knot on his throat yet he stayed silent. Leaning down he left a soft kiss on your forehead, wincing at how cold your skin felt.

"Do you really believe it's possible?" you asked looking up at Jorah trying to hide the melancholy from your voice. Daenerys has been nothing but a fair and just ruler for as long as you had known her, but that was in Essos. Westeros was a completely different story, much more complex and cruel.

"What are you talking about my love?" Jorah's smooth voice made a shiver run down your spine despite the warmth both the warm covers and his body provided.

"A better world" you explained, snuggling even closer to his chest and leaning your head on his shoulder listening to his rhythmic heartbeat. The weight of the question caused the relaxed atmosphere to switch slightly and you almost regretted speaking. Moments of calm and quiet were extremely rare between the two of you.

"We've made it this far, haven't we?" he replied appearing certain of his words, but the tightening of his grip around your waist let you know he wasn't as confident as he aspired to appear.

"We have…" you agreed "And we should keep trying, you know. For a better world"

A better world, that was what Jorah had fought for, but now that the end was almost there, the one person he wanted to share it with was gone and Jorah found himself completely lost once again. It was supposed to be your world, the one the two of you would share after it was all over.

No, he had to be strong. The world you had always dreamt was still in danger and there was no time for grief. You may be gone, Jorah realized, but your dream carried on. That world you had fought and died for was awaiting, calling for him.

"For a better world…" he whispered shoving back his tears. The war was not over and Jorah knew he needed to give his everything into making the world that would surface after all the bloodshed and destruction be one of kindness and compassion. At that moment, Jorah made a vow to do whatever it took to help build this world you so much desired.

Sorrow and regret would have to wait because this was a time of hope.

And Jorah was determined to fight for it even if it killed him.

For a better world

For you

#jorah mormont imagine #jorah mormont x reader #jorah mormont #jorah x reader #jorah imagine #jorah angst #angst #I FEEL BAD FOR THIS #game of thrones #game of thrones imagine #game of thrones x reader #got imagine #got x reader #got #got season 8 #got s8

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clericbyers · 5 years

Text

learning to heal (part 4)

excerpt: Mike wouldn’t let his shitty mood affect the happy air surrounding the Party. He wouldn’t be the one to make everyone upset because he had to spazz out like in the last month of freshman year when he panicked in the middle of a celebratory dinner because the waitress kept giving him looks like she knew his darkest secrets. Like she knew he liked boys and found one of his teammates cute enough to be a little flustered about it. Like she knew he and his friends were monster hunters and got 30 people killed during the summer of ‘85.

length: 4.5K words

POV: Mike Wheeler

Read on AO3

Master Post

tag list: @vaugency , @lifeinvirtualreality , @princestanley , @lgbtqbyers , @smhbyler , @ticomat , @lightswriting , @lithhiums , @lullabyers , @byers-remorse, @cstlebyrs, @lomlbyers ♡

——————————————

“You took your time getting here!”

Mike rolled his eyes as he, Will, El, and Lucas skidded to a stop by the driveway to Dustin’s house. He was sitting on the curb with his bike and angrily glared at the late quartet. Lucas gave Mike and Will the stink eye as he bounded off his bike to stand by Dustin.

“You can blame Will and Mike; they took their sweet time getting to my place as if I don’t live a few houses away.”

Will shrugged and started biking in small circles in the driveway. El was gripping onto his waist and leaning her head on his back as he went by. “Sorry we’re late, Dustin. Mike and I went to bed later than expected and got kinda distracted when we woke up.”

“Distracted by what?” Lucas snorted. “Dust mites? The way sun filters through Mike’s shitty drapes? The feeling of blankets on your skin?”

Mike and Will exchanged a look, a look that screamed of guiltiness, and Dustin groaned. “Does it really matter what they were doing? We need to get Max and leave before the diner gets too full and starts making Mike antsy.”

Will halted his bike near Mike and he watched El’s grip on Will tighten more. “Antsy?”

“Yeah. Crowds sometimes get to me, but it’s not a big deal.” Mike shrugged and turned toward Lucas and Dustin, who raised suspicion-arched eyebrows at his words. “What? It’s really not a big deal.”

“You threw up in the back of Steve’s car just thinking about the crowd during your first relay race. Oh also, we tried to go to the movies to watch The Voyage Home last month and you spent half the movie in the bathroom doing breathing exercises.”

Lucas started laughing. “Oh my god, I still remember Mike’s face when he came back and saw the humpback whales and Spock’s headband and got so confused.”

“Hey! Look, the humpback whales part made no sense.”

“I told you already, Mike,” groaned Dustin, “Spock and Kirk needed to find the whales that sang at the same frequency as the probe since humpbacks are extinct in the future.”

“It’s still stupid! Same with Spock saying ‘the hell’ every five minutes. I didn’t miss much of anything being in the bathroom.”

“Well, I like The Voyage Home . It was a good conclusion to the trilogy.”

Mike turned on Will with an exaggerated gasp. “You wound me, Byers.”

“Are you really gonna stand here and let Will get away with acting like TMP doesn’t exist?”

“Yes, Lucas, I am, because that movie sucked ass.”

“This is why I’m a Star Wars nerd!” cried out Dustin as he stood up. “We can all at least agree that The Empire Strikes Back is the best of the three.”

Silence took to the air. Mike spoke up first. “Actually...”

“Finish that sentence, Mike, and you won’t have a tongue to continue it.”

El giggled from behind Will and Mike turned to face her out of instinct. She noticed his gaze but didn’t make eye contact and continued to stare ahead. Something in Mike broke a little seeing El unwilling to even just give him a smile. He knew he had no right to be upset over how she took the breakup even if it has been months already, he knew he broke her heart this past summer and he too was still pained by the ordeal, but he had hoped at least that maybe when they saw each other face to face it would be a happier occasion.

Will reached out to squeeze Mike’s arm and then turned back to Dustin and Lucas. “Let’s go get Max, then. She can give us a tie breaker opinion if we need it.”

Max was not enthusiastic about being asked to choose which Star Wars movie she thought was the best and mostly kept saying Return of the Jedi just to annoy Lucas. Will biked next to Mike when El transferred to Max and rode with her toward Main Street. Mike kept sending his boyfriend glances during the ride and he was always a little flustered when they happened to make eye contact and Will’s lips lifted into a small shy smile. There was something refreshing in being able to turn to his side and find such comfort as he did in Will as a best friend and as his significant other.

Mike couldn’t wait to tell the Party about how much he loved Will, about how lucky he was to fall for someone as kind and caring as the other boy. Even better, he was so extremely lucky that Will loved him back. It was nice to have this private happiness for himself and Will to share in by themselves—well, his mom and Will’s mom knew but they only ever exchanged knowing smiles whenever they caught Will and Mike standing a little closer than usual and trying to sneak cheek kisses when they passed each other by—but Mike was beyond ready to tell his friends.

Lunch was normal as usual: rowdy, loud, and uplifting as hanging out with friends usually went. Sometimes they were all so happy and normal that Mike could forget about the dark thoughts ruminating in the back of his mind, the memories that threatened to consume him when he closed his eyes to darkness. He could forget that no one knew what he hadn’t done to save people, no one knew that the monster built from the bodies and blood of their neighbors that terrorized Starcourt was a product of negligence.

It was weird how survivor's guilt worked. Mike never thought he’d really be faced with the troubling issue but he couldn’t help feeling like if they had done more, if he had focused more on what Will was facing, on what Dustin had found with Cerebo, maybe they could have saved more people. Maybe then the young couple from five houses down wouldn’t have been absorbed into a flesh monster and have their autonomy ripped from them as they melted into the single-focused mind of the Mind Flayer. Maybe then El wouldn’t be powerless, fatherless, Mikeless—not that he was the only person El lost but their closeness and desire to be together was a huge part of both their lives and losing that affected both of them.

Mike sighed to himself and closed his eyes as he leaned back in his chair. Will, who was sat across from him, nudged Mike’s foot with his own and sent him a concerned look. Mike smiled back—he was fine, just thinking too hard—and nudged Will’s foot in turn. Will nudged twice, Mike nudged twice, and then they kept playing footsie under the table until Max called them out for shaking the table. Dustin then tried to have a soda chugging contest with Lucas and won with Max’s encouragement, which made Lucas playfully salty and he brooded for a good minute and talked only to El, who humored him lightly.

Will ordered a milkshake to share with Mike while the others chatted excitedly between themselves about the New Year’s celebration and fireworks that would be happening where the fair was usually held. Mike would much prefer to stay indoors watching Dick Clark count the ball drop, but he knew social interaction and connection with his friends was what he needed most. He had already spent so much of his freshman year avoiding people whenever possible; the only reason why his friends knew about his therapy sessions and medication was because they ran into him the day after he missed school and pestered him for details. Mike couldn’t even give a good reason as to why he didn’t tell Will and El, too, why he left them in the dark despite the fact they were the most important people in his life.

Mike squeezed his eyes shut and flexed his hands on the table. Now was not the time for this. He wouldn’t let his shitty mood affect the happy air surrounding the Party. He wouldn’t be the one to make everyone upset because he had to spazz out like in the last month of freshman year when he panicked in the middle of a celebratory dinner because the waitress kept giving him looks like she knew his darkest secrets. Like she knew he liked boys and found one of his teammates cute enough to be a little flustered about it. Like she knew he and his friends were monster hunters and got 30 people killed during the summer of ‘85.

“Mike,” Will called out and the soft tone brought Mike back to the table and the conversation. The vanilla milkshake stood between them untouched and he frowned. He didn’t remember hearing the waiter stop by at all. Was he that entrenched in his thoughts to block out all other senses and trap himself in his head?

“You good?” Lucas asked from Mike’s other side, chewing on a fry as nonchalantly as possible.

Mike nodded. “I’m good. Just distracted.”

“We were just talking about X-Men, it’s no biggie,” added Dustin. “Max got some comics and has been reading a few to El so we wanted to discuss some fave runs.”

Mike’s brain was blanking on him. He couldn’t even think of anything concerning X-Men besides Professor X and Cyclops. He shrugged and turned to the milkshake to occupy his mouth so he didn’t have to actually offer an opinion. He could feel Will’s eyes on him and he looked up while slurping at the shake and made eye contact. Will rolled his eyes but his cheeks were flushed and the sight made Mike smile a little. He nudged Will under the table and mouthed I love you as best he could while blocking the side of his mouth from Lucas next to him.

Will’s smile grew more and he tried to hide it behind his straw but he fell out into giggles and caught everyone else’s attention. Dustin rolled his eyes and stage whispered to El beside him, “They’re back at it again, using that secret best-friends-since-we-were-five telepathy.”

Mike stuck his tongue out at his friend after a small chuckle. “You’re just jealous that all it takes is one glance from me for Will to lose his cool.”

“Hey, I’m not that easy to break.” Will retorted with a small kick under the table. Mike pretended it hurt more than it actually did and moaned as he dramatically grabbed at his ankle.

“My ankles are and I kinda need them for track!”

Will sputtered and then fell out laughing again. Lucas was cackling into his fries and Max was helping him by patting his back when he started to choke from laughing so hard. El was watching Mike, he could feel her eyes on him, and he chanced a glance with a small smile he hoped didn’t look like a grimace.

El maintained eye contact for about two seconds before she blinked and reached over to steal a few of Max’s fries. Mike considered it a success and turned back to finish his milkshake with Will. On the ride back, Mike and Lucas rode side-by-side in the back while Will and Dustin rode together up front and El and Max rode between the two pairs of bikers. Lucas was silent for a while before he spoke up with a huff.

“So, you and Will finally pulled your heads out your asses and hooked up.”

Mike nearly biked into a tree from the shock of the sudden statement. He coughed heavily and then gave his friend a glance. “What makes you say that?”

“You have a very expressive face,” the other boy chuckled to himself. “It’s how I knew you weren’t doing too hot in a really bad way even before you went to the doctor.”

Mike bit his bottom lip. “I know you don’t want me saying thanks or whatever but I really am glad you stuck with me through that.”

“What else would I do? You’re my friend and friends don’t ditch each other when in need.” Lucas smiled. “We’ve been friends far too long; I don’t care if you’re a jock track star now, to me you’re still goofy ass nerd Mike Wheeler with the fattest crush on his equally lovesick best friend.”

Mike laughed and felt a little warmth in his chest from the comment. Lucas was always blunt and direct, which is probably why he worked so well with Max, who was equally as blunt and direct. Lucas was just as loyal as anyone else in the Party and he and Mike has been friends the longest only after Mike and Will. Mike loved him so deeply and trusted him just as much.

“Was it that obvious?”

Lucas cackled. “Are you seriously asking that question? Dude, I thought you were gonna die when Will announced he was moving. And the way you spent practically all the rest of that summer at his side? Mike, you may be oblivious but Dustin and I have eyes and we use ‘em.”

“Dustin knows, too?”

“I don’t think he knows you two are together now but yeah, he knows you like Will.” Lucas shrugged. “It was kinda just a part of the group dynamic, you know? You two liking each other and always dancing around it as if we couldn’t tell, as if you each didn’t know yourselves.” The boy huffed with a smirk. “Dustin and I used to joke about what excuse you two would pull out of a hat for Will to stay over.”

“There were never any excuses!”

Lucas laughed again. “I know but it was fun to guess. Point is, hell yeah we know. I love El and really wanted you two to work things out because you each make each other happy and you deserve that. We all do.” Mike nodded solemnly. “Still, there was always a part of me that hoped that maybe, just maybe, you and Will could find happiness together like before the Demogorgon.”

“Wow.” Mike slowed his bike as they rolled down a hill. “You know, speaking of the Demogorgon, I think I’m gonna tell my mom about everything that happened.”

Lucas gaped. “You’re what ? I thought you were gonna keep that locked up forever.”

“Yeah, but…” Mike glared at the ground. “She helped me and Will get together. She wants me to be happy and the only way that’s gonna happen is if she knows why I’m not.”

“Well, at least you’re admitting it now.”

“That I’m dating Will or that I’m depressed?”

“Both but I meant your depression.” Lucas sighed. “I know you don’t like talking about it and you like pretending that life doesn’t terrify you, but it’s okay to speak up with us. Me, Dustin, and Max. We want you to feel better, too. Don’t forget that.”

Mike’s voice was a low whisper when he replied. “I know. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, man,” groaned Lucas as he scuffed his tire against the curb, “Friends don’t need apologies or whatever for being friends.”

“I know, but—,”

“Shut up, Mike, and let it go, alright?” The boy sent Mike a warm smile. “You love to talk but right now just, I don’t know, listen and find comfort in that, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“I said shut up.”

Mike rolled his eyes and steered his bike toward Lucas, who yelped and sped up his pace to avoid collision. Mike laughed and watched Lucas catch up to Dustin and Will loudly exclaiming how Mike was trying to run him into the snow. The rest of the ride to the Wheeler’s was spent in silence but Mike could feel the anxiety bubbling inside as he thought about what he would tell his mom. Will parked his bike beside him when they arrived, gently gripping his arm while everyone also attempted to suspend the inevitable split up caused by arrival.

“Good luck,” Lucas muttered when he hopped off his bike to give Mike a hug. “Call me if you need anything, alright?”

“Of course, dude.” Mike chuckled and hugged his friend back. “See you tomorrow.”

El hopped off Max’s bike and made her way to Mike and Will with a small hum. Max waved goodbye and the three watched their friends bike away as the chill of winter sank into their bones. Will shivered and Mike grabbed his hand to lead him inside, turning to hold out a hand for El as well. She blinked twice and frowned but took his hand, too, gently twining their fingers in a promise that the anger and heartbreak wouldn’t keep them from being friends. Not for long at least.

With his closest friends’ hands in his own, Mike felt courage seep into his soul and feed him the strength he needed to tell his mom the truth behind his misery.

“Mom,” he called out shakily, Will’s grip tightening with much-needed comfort.

His mom was upstairs but she came down at the sound of Mike’s voice and smiled warmly as she saw him holding hands with Will and El. “Mike,” she started happily, “I’m assuming the lunch meet went well.”

“Really well,” Mike shuffled on his feet and sent El a glance. “I, uh, I actually need to tell you something really important. And you can’t tell anyone else.”

She raised her eyebrows and tentatively sat down on the couch. “You know I won’t tell anyone about...about you liking boys. I’ll love you still, I do love you still.

Mike coughed and looked upstairs in hopes that his dad wasn’t eavesdropping. “No, I mean, I do but that’s not this conversation.”

And what a weird thing to confess about so easily. Mike liked boys. Only boys. And he confirmed it so easily like any other ‘yes or no’ question. Something in his gut churned, a mixture of relief that his mom truly didn’t care and loved him still, and fright that he confirmed aloud that his attraction to boys and boys only was real.

“What’s going on, Mike?”

The boy turned to Will and then sent his mom an apologetic glance. “When Will disappeared in ‘83, he didn’t just disappear. He was kidnapped by a monster from another dimension that got to him through a gate El opened with her mind.”

Mike’s mom blinked twice and then started laughing though she tried to hide it with a hand to her mouth. “Is that the story you kids told yourselves to deal with the fact he was missing?”

“No, Mrs. Wheeler, it’s real.” Will lifted up his shirt just enough for the burn scar to be visible. It made Mike sick to think about it, think about how they had to burn the Mind Flayer out of Will. “This scar isn’t from the stove. The monster possessed me in ‘84 and my mom and Mike and Hopper helped excise it from me. El closed the gate, too.”

“And then in ‘85,” Mike swallowed the lump in his throat, “the monster came back and...it melted our neighbors into a machine made of human flesh, blood, and bone. The gate was reopened and Hopper died trying to close it.”

“I was the one who found Will,” El spoke up hesitantly. “I found him in my mind. I can find anyone in my mind.”

Mike sent her a smile. “El has really cool powers actually; she can flip cars and levitate objects and I actually hid her in the basement during ‘83 while Will was missing.” Karen’s jaw dropped. “I’m still amazed you didn’t notice.”

“Can she,” Karen turned to El with curiosity. “Can she demonstrate?”

El shifted uncomfortably and Will spoke up. “Her powers are gone now thanks to the monster but it’s real. It’s all real.”

Karen blinked multiple times, eyes darting between the three kids with disbelief written in her eyes. She settled her gaze on Mike and crumpled. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

Mike was stuck between surprise that she accepted everything so easily and guilt that he kept this to himself for so long. “I legally couldn’t; the US government is involved in all of this,” he waved between himself, Will, and El, “but you deserve to know why...why I needed therapy. Why I can’t sleep at night, how me and El met in the first place, why I fell apart when the Byers left. Why I’m so fucked up.”

Will’s grip on his hand tightened just enough and he presses himself closer to Mike’s side as a comforting force against his rapidly declining thoughts. Karen stood up and made her way to Mike with tears pooling in her emotional eyes. He was taller than her, head bowed down as he fought his own tears back— pathetic; be a leader, Michael —but he managed to make eye contact with her regardless.

“You are dealing with so much, my dear,” she started quietly. “I’m sorry you felt you had to carry the burden yourself.”

“Dustin and Lucas and Max know. Nancy, too.” Mike rubbed at the back of his neck. “The monster got Barb back then.”

Karen gasped with a hand to her mouth. “Oh, poor girl.” The woman closed her eyes to keep her tears back and then opened them with a shaky smile drawn on her painted lips. “I’m so glad you finally told me.”

Mike shrugged but he could feel happiness threatening to blossom in his chest. “I, uh, well, having Will and El back reminded me that I don’t have anyone else in the house who knows . Nancy does yeah but she doesn’t like to talk about it. And neither do I really but she’s my sister and we don’t talk about a lot of things.”

“You two are close.”

“Yeah, but she doesn’t know that I don’t even want to be on the track team but she looks so happy seeing me on the field; I can’t take that away from her!” Mike clenched his fists angrily as the words spilled from his mouth. “She doesn’t know about me and Will or that I’m—,” the word wouldn’t come out but Mike knew they all knew what he wanted to say. “She doesn’t know a lot of things. But you do. Everything but the secret about the Upside Down. And I can’t keep this up! This lie about who I am, what I’ve seen, what I’ve done .”

Karen rushed to take Mike in her arms and he fell into her embrace just as quickly. Mike felt Will and El release his hands so he could wrap his arms around his mom and hug her tightly. She was sniffling a little, gently rubbing his back and it made Mike feel like a kid again but in a good way. It made him feel like he was 6 or 7, being soothed after falling off his bike in the driveway and scratching his knee. It made him feel like what he just relayed to his mom could easily be bandaged over like that scrape.

“Mike, I love you.” was all she said and it was all Mike wanted to hear, all he needed to hear. “I just want you to be happy . You can quit track, you can join theater, you can do whatever you want, I don’t care.” She took his face in her hands and fixed him with a steady glare. Mike couldn’t look away even if he wanted to. “If there’s anything I’ve learned in life, it’s learning to be yourself. Let yourself be who you are, not who everyone wants you to be.”

Mike frowned. “Is this why you and Dad are thinking about getting a divorce?”

Karen froze and bowed her head. “Yes. I’m sorry. You weren’t supposed to know.”

“I can handle it. He barely cared about me anyway.” Mike huffed and reached up to squeeze his mom’s hand. “I love you, Mom, yeah? We’ll both be happy.”

Karen grinned and Mike watched her turn to Will and El with equally wide smiles. El was the first to initiate the hug, brown pigtails whipping around with the intensity of the action. Will turned to wrap his arms around Mike from behind and pressed his face into his back with a hum. Mike laid his hands over Will’s and leaned into the touch with a smile. The conversation went a lot easier than Mike thought it would and the weight off his shoulders had him a little weak in the knees.

He was so lucky, oh so lucky , to have the people in his life that he did.

And when New Year’s Eve came the next day, Mike and Will told their friends about their new relationship just as they planned. Dustin pulled the two into one armed hugs, Lucas shared a knowing look with Mike, Max gave Will a high five for it all, and El...she smiled and nodded with approval and even though she already knew thanks to the conversation with his mom the day before, it was great to have her support confirmed.

“10 seconds until the new year,” started Lucas as he rocked Max in his arms.

“8 now!” Dustin shouted as he took El into his own arms for a tight hug. She laughed and patted his cheeks with a wide grin.

“5 seconds,” whispered Will into Mike’s ear as he held him close to his chest. The Party was toward the back of the crowd, hidden from the gazes of Hawkins as all eyes took to the sky in preparation for the fireworks show.

“3.” A warm kiss to the shell of Mike’s ear.

“2.” A lingering kiss to the nape of his neck.

“1.” A soft breath against his cheek.

Mike twisted and grabbed his boyfriend’s face as the crowd cheered Happy New Year and the fireworks lit up the sky. He looked into green eyes, traced the reflection of pyrotechnics in those sparkling orbs, and leaned in for their first kiss of 1987. Will smiled into it, pulled Mike closer, and ignored the whoops and cheers of their friends surrounding them.

“I love you,” Mike murmured when he pulled away, then turned to the rest of his friends. “I love you all, man. You’re the best friends a guy could ask for.”

“And we love you, too, Mike.” Dustin tagged on with a grin. “Our baby leader.”

Mike rolled his eyes and punched the other boy in the arm with a chuckle. El watched him carefully and then reached out a hand for Mike’s own. He passed it along, worry in his chest as her brown eyes filled with emotion he couldn’t understand. “I love you,” she said and it was different. It was different than the last time, not as desperate, not as needy. It was resignation and acceptance in three words, understanding and moving on in one: love .

“I love you, too,” he breathed out and then pulled the younger girl into his arms. She pressed her face into his chest and clung onto his shirt with shaking fists. “Thank you.”

El laughed. “Next time, don’t hide yourself from me. Or Will. Or yourself.”

A chill ran down his spine but he shook it off and straightened the messy hair on her head. “I’ll do my best.”

“That’s all anyone can ask for.”

#byler #byeler #lth #learning to heal #lth fic #lth part 4 #this is the last part of the first act kinda #anyway srsly thank u all for sticking w this!!

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ncfan-1 · 5 years

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Man, I really felt that when you called Rhea a karma Houdini. Like, while Edelgard’s my fave, it absolutely makes sense for her to die in 3 out of the 4 routes. But what exactly is Rhea doing if she’s not archbishop and trying to control humanity and history? Sure she wants to reform stuff but after everything it’s just that easy for her to hang around Byleth forever since she’s immortal and Byleth will likely have a longer than average lifespan?

I’mnot entirely sure as to the exact track of this question, but yeah, I feel youabout Rhea escaping the consequences of her actions (consequences that fit the scaleof her actions, at least) on 3 out of 4 routes--Karma Houdini is an excellentterm for it. She’s killed on Crimson Flower, and apparently she dies inVerdant Wind (going off of the wiki, here; haven’t played that route yet). Buton Silver Snow (provided you build up her supports enough; I’ve seenconflicting evidence as to whether an A- or S-support is enough to save her;something about Catherine’s unpaired ending talking about her continuing to actas Rhea’s bodyguard?) and Azure Moon, yeah, consequences are not reallyhappening.

Andto be clear, I don’t consider dying either her experiencing the consequences orescaping them. Dying and experiencing consequences for your wrongdoings are twodifferent things. While they don’t have to be mutually exclusive,they’re often two parallel lines, and in such circumstances, will never meet.

ButI think the nature of her wrongdoings ties directly into why it’s so difficultto hold her accountable for them.

Rheacreated a church with herself as one of the central figures of veneration—which,on top of being hilariously egotistical,is a clear signal of just what she wants from the people of Fódlan. Rhea spenta millennium censoring and revising Fódlan’s history, spent a millenniumamassing power to herself to the point that she has a standing army, thelegitimacy of an Adrestian emperor’s coronation--and, by extension, rule--canbe called into question if she isn’t present (and it seems to be the same inFaerghus as well, as it was Melusine--the brand-new Archbishop--who oversawDimitri’s coronation), all while somehow managing to keep people from askingtoo many questions about her seeming agelessness*, and basically settingherself up as the shadow ruler of Fódlan. Sure, Fódlan is politically ruledby the King (or reigning Queen) of Faerghus, the Emperor of Adrestia, and theDuke (or Duchess) of Leicester, but their rule can have no legitimacy withoutRhea’s approval. She holds the strings of power in her hands.

Rheahas spent a millennium punishing the people of Fódlan for their “sins.” It wasnever going to be enough for her, there was never any point where she was goingto be able to pull back, look at everything and think to herself “they haveatoned enough.” These people were always going to be the dirty thieves whomurdered her people and stole their bones. In her eyes, they were always goingto be the dirty thieves who took her mother from her. Never mind that all ofthis had centuries ago passed out of living memory for the people beingpunished. They must atone. They must always atone. (I honestly thinkthat was actually a nice touch to her characterization as an immortal; wheneverything is in living memory for you, it can be really hard to let goof a grudge, even when the people you’re holding a grudge against had nothingto do with the incident in question and are many, many generationsremoved from the people who were.)

Andthe ironic thing about that? Is that in the process of putting Fódlan throughthis millennium-long regiment of constant atonement, Rhea robbed them of thetools to really grapple and genuinely come to terms with what she waspunishing them for. The true, bloody history of the Heroes’ Relics and theCrests? She lied to them about all of it, and she conducted the necessarycensorship and historical revisionism to help ensure that her lies would neverbe exposed as such. The people of Fódlan can never truly put their historybehind them if they don’t know what that history is. They can never makedecisions going forward about how they truly want to regard Heroes’ Relics**and Crests if they don’t know what these things truly are. They don’t know thatthese things are truly the spoils of genocide, rather than gifts from thegoddess. They can never decide how they, as a society, want to treat the spoilsof genocide. And whose fault is that?

Rheahas created a system where the people she is punishing can never truly atonefor the things she’s punishing them for, because they don’t know what they’re supposed to be atoning for. The system isthis way by design, and was likely designed this way because Rhea cannot bringherself to forgive them. It’s sort of like when a parent punishes their youngchild for doing something wrong, but doesn’t tell the kid what they did wrong, refuses totell the kid what they did wrong. After the parent does this enough times, there’sa very real chance that the message the kid is going to internalize is thatthey’re just inherently bad, and thatthey must always please and placate their parent if they ever want to be good.In this case, Rhea is punishing Fódlan by making sure they always worship themother they “stole” from her, that they always revere her in her true identityas Seiros, that they always revere her other surviving kin (the saints) thathumanity also tried to “steal” from her, and that they never, ever know why things are the way thatthey are.

Rheahas proven herself perfectly capable of caring deeply about individual humans.Catherine, Cyril, Shamir, and Jeralt all spring to mind. And in the case ofCyril and Shamir, she’s proven capable of making compromises with individualhumans regarding faith. These things neither change, nor excuse, the way Rhearegards humanity as a whole. Her willingness to let Shamir serve her withoutShamir being a believer in the Church of Seiros, her willingness to let Cyrilcome to a decision on his own as to whether he wants to become a believer inthe Church of Seiros, does not erase the purging of the Western Church, not allof whom could possibly have been involved in the violent incidents we see inthe game. It just serves as a reminder that everyone is capable of caring forother people, even if they are, on a larger level, deeply misanthropic. Just becauseCrimson Flower!Rhea is Rhea pushed to an extreme, does not mean there isnothing valuable we can take away from it as regards to her views of humanity.

Andthe experiments she conducted on Melusine’s mother and her predecessors? Yeah,part of me is like “I could write a whole post about just that”, and the otherpart of me knows that I haven’t finished Silver Snow yet, and I need to wait. I’llchew on this one later. I’ll be chewing on it quite a lot.

Allof this, just because she can’t cope with life without her mother. It’s anextraordinarily petty reason tosubjugate an entire continent for a millennium, an extraordinarily petty reasonto put a stranglehold on the natural progression of three differentcivilizations. I think this is why, even in the Blue Lions route, where thenarrative wastes no opportunity trying to make Edelgard as unsympathetic aspossible, I still prefer Edelgard to Rhea, because at least Edelgard can seebeyond herself. At least the things Edelgard does aren’t just for her personalbenefit. But this post isn’t about Edelgard. It’s about Rhea, and why it wouldbe so difficult to hold Rhea accountable for everything she’s done.

Theanswer to that lies in how very successfulshe’s been in the past. It takes extraordinary circumstances for any of thetruth of Fódlan’s history to come to light; that’s how good she’s been at hercensorship and revision of Fódlan’s actual history (And none of it comes to light in Azure Moon). If, say, in Azure Moon,the truth came to light, it would have a deeply destabilizing effect on societyas a whole—while I do regard Edelgard’s path to a better Fódlan as the paththat has the best chance of actually fixing the problems permanently, I’m notgonna lie and say I think Fódlan post-game in Crimson Flower was not rocked by upheaval for a long time. So you have to be very, very careful about exposing her lies, ifyou think exposing them is even worth the fallout of doing so.

AndRhea has also been very successful in convincing everyone around her that sheis truly benevolent. Even after being sent out to purge the Western Church withthe other knights, Catherine still loves and adores Rhea and thinks she can dono wrong; it takes Crimson Flower!Rhea ordering Catherine to burn down Fhirdiadto even begin to shake Catherine’sbelief in Rhea’s benevolence. While we will likely never know for certain, it’sentirely possible that Jeralt was called upon to do similar things in his timeas Captain of the Knights of Seiros, and it took Rhea interfering with hisinfant daughter to jar him enough to break with her. So in a route like AzureMoon, how do you even begin to convince people that Rhea isn’t as benevolent asshe seems? She is, after all, so very good at appearing as this benevolentmother figure.

Longstory short, it’s difficult to expose Rhea’s wrongdoings or hold heraccountable for them in a route like Azure Moon, because she is so very good atwhat she does. She’s had a millennium to perfect it, and the protagonists ofthat route just won a war against theperson who was trying to denounce Rhea as a tyrant and throw off the bell jarRhea slapped down on Fódlan as a whole.***

So,what’re you gonna do? Rhea had all the power in the world, and she abused itwith zeal. And the thing about thatis, when people in positions of high power abuse their power over others, itcan be hard, even impossible, to truly hold them accountable in ways thatactually fit their wrongdoings, because the deck is so heavily stacked in theirfavor. That’s what’s going on here. What court could you convict Rhea in? Whatcourt could you even bring her to? What would you charge her with? And what do you do when the people all rise up inher defense?

Ona personal level, Rhea would likely suffer personalconsequences. The way my Azure Moon playthrough went, Catherine and Shamirwent off on a lifetime journey full of adventure and misadventure, Cyril flewoff into the sunset with Lysithea, Alois became the new captain of the Knightsof Seiros serving under Melusine, Gilbert left the Knights of Seiros andreconciled with his family, and Melusine got married to Dimitri. And sinceMelusine got to A-support with Seteth, there was probably an extremely unpleasant conversationbetween the two of them and Rhea postgame.

Myheadcanon from there is that Rhea basically wound up completely alone. She cameto see Melusine as her own person, independent of her potential as Sothis’svessel, just in time for Melusine to learn everythingthat Rhea had done to her and the others like her, and recoil from her infear and disgust, and want nothing to do with her. Melusine was basically Rhea’sgrandchild, and any children she might have Rhea’s great-grandchildren, but ontop of Melusine’s reaction, Dimitri’s learned just enough to put two and twotogether about what Rhea thought was going to happen when Melusine sat onSothis’s throne in the Holy Tomb, and has decided, not without reason, that hedoesn’t want Rhea coming anywhere near Melusine, or any of their prospectivechildren.

Seteth,as implied by people taking note of his and Rhea’s deteriorating relationshipafter Melusine’s transformation in the Academy Phase, is appalled by all ofthis. He’s been complicit in Rhea’s censorship and historical revisionism (wehear early on about how he disposes of reading material in the library that heconsiders ‘inappropriate’), but to me, it’s unclear to what extent this iswilling and enthusiastic, and to what extent it’s simply that Seteth spent solong in seclusion that by the time he came outof seclusion, Rhea was able to simply present all of this to him as a faitaccompli and he had no choice but to go along with it. As indicated in supportchains with people like Ingrid and Felix, Seteth is not overly enamored ofsociety as it is. This is the thing that finally leads him to break with Rheafor good. He would never support anyone else’s attempt to hurt her, and wouldstill protect her if it came down to it, but he’s pretty much done with her asa person.

Flaynis an interesting case. In her B-support with Melusine, she makes reference toknowing about some sketchy stuff Rhea’s done in the past, but it’s unclear justwhat she’s referring to. She could be hearkening back to the days when theystill went by Seiros and Cethleann, she could be referring to the censorshipand revisionist history, but she is almost certainly not referring to the experiments Rhea conducted on the people whowere either her biological children, or people she literally created. There’sno way she knew anything about it. The truth reaches Flayn’s ears eventually,and her reaction is basically that “*nervous laughter* what the fuck” gif that’ssuch a mainstay on Tumblr. She doesn’t react quite as Seteth does, because shedoesn’t fully grasp all of the implications of it the way he does, but shenever looks at Rhea the same way again, and starts to withdraw from heremotionally.

So.In my postgame-Azure Moon headcanon, Rhea lost all of her trusted and cared-forhuman retainers. She lost any chance of a relationship with Melusine or herprospective children. She lost the esteem of her remaining kin, and wound upmore or less completely alone in the world. And those are consequences, andpretty weighty ones, but they aren’t consequences that fit the scale ofeverything she did. They just sort of exist.

*Isay this because Rhea really doesn’t seem like the sort of person who’d feelcomfortable letting other people rule as archbishop in her place (unless it’sthe person she regards primarily as her mother’s vessel), even if only as atemporary measure to draw attention away from her immortality. If anyone everdoes a ‘Fódlan Gothic’ post, there had better be a bullet point on there that reads“No one knows how old Rhea is. No one ever asks how old Rhea is.”

**And in this case, Rhea is the reason people have been running around making useof the spoils of genocide, because she’sthe one who let the Elites keep the Relics. Am I the only one who cannotfathom a reason as to why she would let the Elites keep the Relics after theyswore fealty to her? Those things are her people’sbones; why on God’s green earth would she just let them keep them? If hervictory over Nemesis was resounding enough and her army’s losses minimal enoughthat she could make the Elites fall in line without problems, she could easilyhave made the confiscation of the Relics a term of their surrender. “I will letyou live in exchange for your swearing your fealty to me and GIVING ME BACK MYFAMILY’S BONES, YOU ASSHOLES.” That’s perfectly equitable. That’s perfectly fair. And in keeping with Rhea’s love ofrevisionist history, she wouldn’t have to out herself as a Nabatean or revealthe truth of what the Relics were in the official record of how this exchangewent down. Just say something like “And after the battle was won, the divineSeiros decreed that the Elites return the weapons she had bestowed upon them,for they were too dangerous to be used except in times of great crisis.” Andhonestly, saying that the Relics are too dangerous except in times of greatcrisis isn’t exactly a lie, is it?This one just makes my head hurt; no matter how sympathetically orunsympathetically I regard Rhea at different times of the day, I cannot wrap myhead around it. Here’s hoping finishing Silver Snow and Verdant Wind finallygives me some answers.

***Which she honestly kinda was pre-time skip in all routes, not just Crimson Flower. And was, as I keep harping on,an extraordinarily successful one.You know you’re good at this when you’ve got your “iron fist in the velvet glove”routine down so well that anyone who tries to call you out as a tyrant isimmediately denounced by everyone else as a heretic.

#Fire Emblem Three Houses #Fe16 #Rhea Fe16 #Meta #It does disappoint me that Rhea can't really be held accountable #but it doesn't surprise me either #how would you even go about holding her accountable?#Anonymous

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newhopegeorgie · 5 years

Text

reunited I r.b

(hello! i’ve been away on vacation but i’m finally back with another one shot. this one was based on a request from the very kind @wallows-spring. i hope you enjoy it! if it isn’t exactly what you wanted or envisioned then feel free to send in another request with some more details and i’d be happy to rewrite it for you! anyways, hope you all like it, feedback is always appreciated and requests are open if you’d like to send one in <3)

When New Hope Club announced that they were finally doing a show in your home country you were ecstatic. You’d been following the band since the beginning and only been able to see them perform live once. That was a year ago. You’d begged your mom to let you travel to a different country to go see their show and thankfully she decided to let you. Of course, you’d interacted with the boys on social media, they even followed you, but it wasn’t anywhere near the same as seeing them in person, and you really missed them.

But they’d just released some new tour dates and finally, your country was one of them. It took you no time at all to secure your tickets, making sure you were going to the meet and greet as well. You posted a screenshot on Twitter, tagging the boys and expressing your excitement for the show.

A few minutes later your phone dinged. You didn’t really think anything of it until it started blowing up with notifications. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion and went to see what was going on. Your mentions on Twitter were going insane with your followers and some friends congratulating you. You wondered what it was you did that warranted congratulations, but then you realized. A few minutes ago, Reece had replied to your tweet about your tickets.

@ NewHopeReece: So happy you’re excited love. Can’t wait to see you it’s been so long xx

You’d be lying if you said your heart didn’t jump as you read his tweet. You were surprised by his message, definitely not thinking he’d ever remembered having met you before. The butterflies in your stomach were going crazy and you only felt more excited to meet the boys, despite your show being about two months away.

As the day got closer you posted updates on Twitter, not being able to contain yourself. Every few days you’d send out ‘29 more days!’ or an ‘only 2 weeks left !!’. And every time, without fail, Reece would like your tweet. He almost seemed more excited than you were, not that you were complaining.

Your show was the next day and you felt bits of your excitement turn to nerves. You’re overthinking had taken up most of the space in your brain, meaning to have posted a ‘tomorrow!’ update on Twitter but completely forgetting. A notification on your phone broke through your loud thoughts and you went to see what it was. A new tweet from Reece.

@ NewHopeReece: one more day! @ yourtwitter x

You swore felt your heart stop for a second. Had he been counting down too? You quickly retweeted it and sent it to your friends, being met back with ‘he’s def in love w you’ and ‘you guys are my faves’. You laughed softly at their responses before continuing on with your day. Your mentions were full of other fans saying how cute they thought it was or how they couldn’t wait to see videos of you and Reece meeting. All the kind words made you smile.

That night you couldn’t sleep. You were way too excited to shut your eyes for more than 2 minutes, let alone enough time for you to actually drift off. You’d already spent much of your time procrastinating sleeping. You’d picked out what you were going to wear, practiced your hair and your makeup. Hell you’d even practiced faces to make in your pictures with the boys, you told yourself it was so you didn’t have to worry about not liking your pictures, so you felt less silly about the whole thing. You really didn’t want to be tired though, so you willed your body to sleep despite your racing thoughts trying to keep you up.

•••

The next morning was kind of a blur. You were practically on autopilot as you got ready. All your brain could seem to do was theorize every possible way you could screw this up. You tried not to dwell on it but the thoughts kept nagging you at the back of your mind. You friends had come over not too long ago to get ready with you, as you were all going to the show together. They’d helped put your mind at ease, telling you Reece was probably even more nervous than you, making you chuckle a bit.

“Seriously Y/N, I’m pretty sure you have nothing to worry about,” one of them reassured you.

“Yeah, literally listen to what he just tweeted. ‘@ yourtwitter todays the day x’. Even he’s counting down,” another said with a laugh. Their words made you feel a bit better about the situation and you decided to stop worrying and just let yourself enjoy the night.

After everyone was finished getting ready, you all headed out. The meet and greet didn’t even start for a few hours so you and your friends decided to go get lunch first. You took a picture of your meal, and your friends sitting across the table from you and posted it to Twitter.

@ yourtwitter: concert pregame with these girlies lol

A few minutes later you got a notification. And, yet again, Reece responded to you.

@ NewHopeReece: Didn’t even invite me? I’m hurt @ yourtwitter

You gaped at his message, quickly turning your phone to show your friends what he’d said. “What am I supposed to say?” you asked them. Your friend took your phone from your hands, typing out a response and sending it before handing your phone back to you.

@ yourtwitter: haha i’ll bring you something i promise xx @ NewHopeReece

You laughed at her message, thinking it was funny and that’d be the end of the conversation. But not even a minute later Reece tweeted at you again.

@ NewHopeReece: I’m holding you too that ;) @ yourtwitter

“I was kidding when I put that but now you really have to get him something,” your friend said laughing. You rolled your eyes at her, making a mental note to buy him a cookie on your way out of the cafe.

It was finally time for the meet and greet and you and your friends had just entered the venue. You definitely weren’t the first ones there but you also weren’t too far back in line so you were happy. You felt your excitement rising as you waited, gradually moving closer to the boys. You chatted happily with your group, the cookie you’d bought for Reece held in your hands. The boys were stood in order of George, then Blake, and Reece at the end so you were going to meet him last.

As you got to the front of the line your friends hastily pushed you forward to go first. You approached George with a wide smile on your face. He welcomed you with open arms, saying hello to you. You hugged him tightly and asked him for a picture together. He was incredibly sweet just as you’d expected. The two of you got to talk for about a minute before you were ushered to move on.

When you got to Blake it went about the same as with George. Hugs and pictures and getting to chat for a bit. “Reece is very excited to see you,” he said, handing your phone to you after getting a couple pictures. You let out a giddy laugh, “Seriously?” you asked him. He nodded his head quickly at you. “Hasn’t stopped talking about it. You might wanna go say hi before he shouts at me for taking up all your time.” He said lightheartedly. He gave you one last hug before sending you on your way towards Reece.

His face brightened as he saw you, immediately scooping you up into a tight embrace. “Reunited at last!” he shouted. A few fans that were in line laughed at your little reunion. “It's been so long, I’ve missed you, love!” He let you out of his hug and held your arms, keeping you close as he spoke to you.

“I know, it's been forever!”

“Do you want a picture?” he asked, gesturing to your phone. You nodded and he took it from your grasp, throwing his arm around your waist to take a few photos with you. You thanked him once he was done, shoving your phone into your pocket. “Now if I’m not mistaken, you promised me something earlier.” He said in a teasing tone.

“I did promise you something,” you laughed. You handed him the cookie that you’d gotten for him, “I don’t break promises Bibby,” you said, teasing him back. His face lit up as he took it from you.

“I thought you were joking! Wow, you really are the best,” he said to you, pulling you into his side for another hug. You smiled brightly at him, gladly accepting his warm embrace.

“I’m kind of sad, I don’t want to wait another year to see you again,” you frowned, a half-hearted laugh escaping your lips. Reece placed the cookie on a table not too far from him, frowning at your statement.

“Awe, love I don’t either. I promise we’ll figure something out, I won’t make you wait long.”He looked you in the eyes and for some reason, you trusted that he meant it. One of the event coordinators was trying to move you along, saying you were out of time. Reece hugged you one last time before you had to leave. “The boys and I have a free day tomorrow before we leave, I’ll dm you,” he whispered to you. The coordinator was now rushing you off, getting impatient. You smiled at him, saying goodbye as you left, not before seeing Reece send you a subtle wink.

After the meet and greet you got to enjoy the concert. It was amazing, exceeding all your expectations. It went by far too quickly for your liking and before you knew it, you and your friends were leaving the venue. You all talked a mile a minute, recounting everything that's gone on the past few hours. Your Twitter was flooded yet again and you wondered what's happened.

You opened the app to find countless videos of your interaction with Reece. People were tagging you and him, saying how they shipped you two or thought you guys were adorable. You smiled at the messages, liking and retweeting a few that made you laugh. You wondered to yourself if Reece was actually serious about dming you like he said he would. Of course, you wanted nothing more than to receive a message from him, but then again he was Reece Bibby so you didn’t get your hopes up.

•••

The next day you woke up to the sun shining in your eyes. You smiled to yourself, replaying the previous day over in your mind. You rolled over in bed to go through your phone, much like you did every morning. You’d gone through most of your social media, tapping on the Twitter icon last, opening up the app. You saw a dm notification and furrowed your eyebrows, confused. When you clicked on it you felt your heart jump to your throat, not believing what you had just read.

From @ NewHopeReece: Hey love, it’s Reece. You busy today? x

#reece bibby #reece bibby imagine #reece bibby one shot #reece bibby fluff #blake richardson #george smith #new hope club #new hope club one shot #x reader #reece bibby x reader #request

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