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#and they were both very kind people not pressuring st all
yuribalisms · 1 year
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Nothing quite like a random couple asking if they can pray for you because they just felt the need to at work to put you in an extremely weird headspace for the day
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kittythelitter · 1 year
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CW: Chrissy's mom. Specifically being body shamey and ableist. Also characters being pressured into a relationship they don't want to be in.
Okay but ST season 4 AU where everyone lives, including Chrissy and Jason. Like, Vecna breaks his victims and traps his victims in their own minds instead of killing them so he can feed off their life forces or whatever and Chrissy is found in the trailer broken and covered in upsidedown goop but still alive so everyone's like. This is some weird supernatural bullshit. And Jason still leads a witch-hunt.
After it all, Chrissy is awake and recovering and she breaks up with Jason for being the worst. And her mom is like. You're legally an adult, you chased away a good man, because you're bed bound for now you lost your cheerleading scholarship and the only thing that makes you worth anything. You can't even get a job in your current state. You need a man. If you let me set you up with a rich eligible bachelor and don't fuck it up, we will pay your hospital bills, maybe even college.
Meanwhile Steve is a hero, and is a publicity asset for the Harringtons, and for the first time since he graduated high school has some kind of value to his parents. He's being celebrated, and if they set him up with one of their business partner's kids they can curry favor. More so if it's the poor injured Cunningham girl who is beloved and lauded by the town for being victims of the bizarre serial killer, Henry Creel.
(Ignore the goo and the vines and the crack in the ground that used to be main street there was a serial killer and an earthquake and they were totally unrelated.)
So Steve and Chrissy are both being pressured by their parents into a relationship that even conceptually makes them uncomfortable. But she can't back out without starting adulthood in a wheelchair in crippling debt. And while Steve could probably survive being disowned and his parents' ire his abandonment issues and desperate people pleaser tendencies make him not want to piss off his parents, disappoint the Cunninghams, or hurt Chrissy's feelings.
So they go on a lot of very uncomfortable dates. And they kind of get along. And Steve breaks down and full on Robin word vomits that she's great and he's sure she'll find a great guy but he really doesn't want to upset their parents or hurt her feelings- but he really really doesn't feel that way about her- and it's not because she's in a wheelchair or anything- one of his kids is in a wheelchair- well not his kid- there's these kids he babysits- that's not the point- he's really really sorry, but he kind has a crush on someone else, and he can't keep pretending to date her to make other people happy, and he's really sorry. And she's like. Holy shit.
And he just broke down so she feels comfortable explaining her situation and he, overwhelmed by his protector instincts, agrees to keep up the appearance of dating until her hospital bills are paid and she can make her own choices about what she wants.
So they keep doing public dates and stuff. But outside of that, he invites her to meet his friends, cause she lost a lot of hers in everything. She's been really lonely, and she's very sweet and kind of dorky so she gets along with everyone.
And Steve told Robin everything because she's Robin, but not everyone else because he didn't want to get into his parents bullshit or expose Chrissy's baggage so they're all nice to her and get along but they're a little weird about it because that's Chrissy Cunningham. And Steve's dating her???
Also Robin is weird around her because hot girl, but everyone thinks she's jealous which is a weird dynamic. Chrissy thinks Robin is Steve's crush and keeps talking Steve up to Robin and talking about how Robin's great and how close she and Steve are and how nice that is. And it's very awkward.
Eddie is insanely jealous and he knows that Robin's a lesbian so he's like. Oh she has a crush on her best friend's straight girlfriend. That sucks. And he also hates that he can't hate Chrissy, because she's so fucking nice and sweet to him.
(Nancy, Jon and Argyle are all on varying levels of knowing something is up but are staying out of it because they are too stoned to parse what specifically is happening or too stubborn to admit that they made some wrong assumptions.)
(the kids don't care much beyond being glad that Steve wasn't flirting with every age appropriate girl he crossed paths with anymore)
And then Chrissy figures out that a) whoops she has a crush on her fake boyfriend's best friend (Robin). b) Steve and Eddie are in love. And c) Eddie thinks she and Steve are for real. So Chrissy tries to explain to Eddie that their relationship is fake without spilling Steve's baggage, and mentions that she doesn't even like Steve like that she actually likes Robin.
Through some miscommunication Eddie now thinks Steve is unknowingly Chrissy's beard. And he doesn't want to out Chrissy but he's a little upset that she's using his crush totally platonic guy friend this way.
Meanwhile Chrissy tries to team up with Robin to get Steve and Eddie together. Because Robin clearly loves Steve and Eddie and wants them to be happy even if she hates Chrissy for some reason. (Again Robin doesn't hate Chrissy she's just super awkward).
Boundless shenanigans ensue.
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o-uncle-newt · 3 months
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Cabin Pressure Advent Day 23: Wokingham
WOKINGHAMMMMMMMM!
I absolutely love everything about this episode. Literally everything. It's just basically perfect.
It's also, like Vaduz, an episode that would never, ever, EVER have happened in S1. I mean, S1 had a dude literally die on the plane and "it "what to do" was turned into a comedy routine... this is a much more, Idunno, humanist approach, I guess. It's hilarious, but it takes its humor from things other than the actual medical situation itself.
But even beyond that- would S1 Douglas have played along when Carolyn said that he cried when confronted by the bird strike in St Petersburg? Would he have even put a pause on the game? Would he have even shown up? Almost definitely not. The only constant, of course, is Arthur, who would have been equally willing to show up to keep Martin's mother busy in any season you can name. Lovely, lovely Arthur, and what an absolutely perfect scene by the way.
Now, there's the meta way of looking at it where people are like "I appreciated it when JF was writing a darker and more cynical show," which a) I disagree with factually (I think there were always hints of what the show would become from the beginning- I mean, as far back as Abu Dhabi, Douglas helped Martin out with the match) and b) I disagree with as a matter of taste (the heartwarming episodes are GREAT). But I have to hope that the meta people at least concede that the development FROM S1 to S4 in terms of the very different ways that people behave is extremely consistent with the character development. Douglas and Carolyn have both made some strides in the way that they relate to Martin that allow them to go run interference for him, but at the same time Martin has grown to become the kind of person who they mind less running interference for. He's mellowed, he's started to be less hung up on his rank for the most part, he's less obsessed with his self image. S1 Douglas would have never done it- but S1 Martin would have given him little reason to, and we've seen that change pretty organically.
It also helps, obviously, that Douglas and Carolyn know exactly what they're dealing with. Some of it, maybe, is seeing how Martin (and, to be honest, Caitlin!) ended up that way, with Simon to cut him down to size- and, as we've heard, his dad as well back when he was alive. (Incidentally, I meant to mention this in Uskerty but I found the fact that Martin has worn his dad's signet ring since the funeral to be both really sweet and just... gah. Emotional.) I feel like we've also all, at some point, met people who are, if not Simons themselves, have Simonistic qualities, so to speak. Carolyn and Douglas, as people who love to put on performances like this and have a bit of a proprietary feeling about Martin (in an "only we get to tease him" kind of way), presumably did it at least partly for the fun of it!
That said, this episode would not have been what it could have been without Wendy. Prunella Scales is amazing, and it's worth noting that (as JF mentioned in a podcast interview I heard once) she was in the early stages of dementia and, according to JF, was not always with it offstage but was just absolutely astonishing as soon as they started performing. She plays every note so perfectly, and adds a really interesting note of, well, momness (or I guess I should say mumness) that is really easy to identify with and also a VERY striking contrast to Carolyn, both for better and, occasionally, for worse- Carolyn would have never said anything remotely like "maybe Simon knows best" lol.
All in all, just really really good fun, hilarious, well plotted, all the usual... oh, and with another amazing audio humor joke with the doctor asking about the costume party. Just perfect.
Important question though: how on earth in this whole brag-off with Simon did Martin never slip that he's dating the freaking Princess of Liechtenstein?! How?!?! I'm not going to call it a plot hole because that's not how these things work, but I can imagine that he had to REALLY hold himself back from blurting it out.
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annieofhearts · 18 days
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Getting hard to be an adult fan of Stranger Things let alone Harry Potter. With the new Zionist brand collab and twitter digging up more on Shawn Levy, I’m feeling such visceral cringe towards it, even if Will and Murray don’t turn out to be terribly important to next season’s plot.
Hey, anon! Ok, what I'm getting from this message is that you are an adult fan of Stranger Things and Harry Potter...? Is that it? And you're struggling with it (which is reasonable and relatable).
Idk what you mean about zion*st brand collab though, and I also don't use twitter so I'm not in on the Shawn Levy stuff either...
I can't speak for anyone else, nor would I ever even want to, but these are my thoughts regarding HP and ST:
The thing with Harry Potter is that JK Rowling has kind of made her life mission to promote transphobia and fully advocate against the rights of trans people (especially trans women). She's been on this road for a few years now (since around 2020, I believe...? smth around that), and since then I have sort of come to terms with the fact that buying/consuming anything from the franchise would mean me financially supporting this very rich, very hateful and harmful woman. That was step one for me. I had been a fan of HP for years and years, since I was a little kid and my mom read the books with/for me. And I shared that love for those books and movies with some close friends as well. It really was the "big thing" that everybody loved while I was growing up. But, the more I thought about the story itself and how it was written and how much of JKR's beliefs and political views were ingrained in it, the clearer it became to me that this was a veeeery flawed series. It's not the worst thing in the world. But it is in no way shape or form this amazing, mind blowing story either. Acknowledging that, and seeing it for what it truly is, made it easier for me to finally let go. I loved these books when I was a kid, I have a bunch of fond memories created around them, but at the end of it all what mattered wasn't the books themselves, it was the people that I got to share that experience with... So, in that regard I consider myself a former-HP fan. I'm not a part of the fandom and I don't engage with anything related to it anymore. Now, on to Stranger Things: My approach with this franchise (we can call it a franchise now that they created that TFS play right?) is that I don't buy any official merchandise or whatever. I also don't plan on watching the final season through ~conventional~ means. When it comes to the cast and crew, I don't follow anyone on social media that I know is a fully zioni*st. This show has a lot of problems, both on and off-screen. Some of those might not be deliberate, but other ones are not so simple to shrug off, it's true. So far, the Duffer Brothers, who are the creators/owners of the show, haven't done anything like JKR is doing imo. Like, fully using their money, power and platform to spread a hateful message and do real harm. (At least not that I know of!) Therefore, I, personally, don't feel the need to exclude this show from my life completely. I'm very critical of it, and I think it has a lot of flaws. But to me, ST is 90% about the fandom, and the fandom is a fun and loving place (at least the corner where I hang out lol) and thinking about the characters of this show and engaging with other people on this website is pretty great and rewarding! <3 That doesn't mean that I'm saying this is "the answer" to everyone. Some people will struggle with reconciling that. I get that and I respect it. If this is not fun for you anymore, if there's no part of it to you that is worth sticking around for, if it has become detrimental to you in some way... Then by all means, respect that feeling, try to understand it and perhaps slowly and gradually distance yourself from it all. But, if what you're feeling is some sort of social pressure about being a "good person", then I can tell that watching this show and being a part of this fandom does not reflect on who you are as a person. Your beliefs and most importantly your actions do, how you engage with people and causes. Just to be clear: I do fully support (and encourage!!!) the financial boycotting of this show! I just don't think engaging in its fandom means you are a bad or morally corrupt person. But this is me. I'm not trying to preach anything to anyone!! Please, do what's right for you.
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asa--holland · 2 months
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A S A H O L L A N D
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— basics
name: Asa Holland age / d.o.b.: 47, October 24, 1977 gender, pronouns & sexuality: Cis man, he/him, gay  hometown: Swords, Ireland  occupation: illustrator education: none relationship status: Single children: None positive traits: (5) Creative, Resourceful, Kind, Thoughtful, Witty negative traits: (5) Vengeful, Awkward, Forgetful, Negative, Withdrawn
Full Bio is under the cut - please be aware of trigger warnings before proceeding.
— biography
tw // homophobia, medical malpractice, mental institutions, murder
Asa grew up in a small family home in a town on the outskirts of Dublin. Both parents were devoutly Catholic and the whole family walked to church multiple times a week. He worked summers helping clean up the little church-house in the valley and his father often pawned him off to ‘learn a hard day’s work’ at various places in town. Despite his father having plenty of money and working at a bank in the city, Asa was often treated like he had to provide for his family as well. He wanted to spend time with his siblings but it often fell on him to get a job first, to get his license, to get into college. There was immense pressure from his family at all times to be the model son.
He had always been introverted but starting in high school, he started to rebel, getting angry at his parents and lashing out at them. His father had just started a very high-profile job in the government and his 13 year old son was the least of his issues. Eventually, Asa was sent away to a home for ‘troubled teens’ and was essentially beaten into submission by orderlies and people who did not care about his wellbeing or his mental stability. He was treated like a problem, like an inmate in a prison at the age of 14 and was kept there for years due to his father’s negligence and lies. Saying after Asa came back for a short time once that he was still ‘acting up’. That they had failed and he would expose them if they didn’t forge documents to send Asa off to a mental institution.
Through it all, Asa was manipulated into thinking he was the problem. That he had done so much wrong that he was being punished, and would continue to be for the rest of his life- tormented by the Devil. Because of his father’s lies, he was in and out of a few psychiatric facilities, given experimental (and illegal) medical treatments, and treated as insane. His father was a constant terrifying presence in his life, always finding a new place to send him off to in Ireland, Wales, and London.
Asa changed the course of his fate when one day his father pushed him too far- after another heated argument and further tries at manipulating him to go back to an in-patient facility, Asa murdered his father. He was lucky- his dad never spoke about his son to others due to his immense disappointment, so Asa fleeing to the U.S. was done as covertly as possible.
After moving to the US, he created a large court case to take down the corrupt mental hospital he'd been in back in London - St. Irene's. With meticulous organization and gathering evidence, Asa was able to get the place shut down and several of the doctors sent away to prison - and he in turn won a huge settlement. He did art- something he’d loved to do throughout his time in and out of facilities, and in the past few years he's created some children's books that have done well on the market, the second one even hitting the NYT Bestsellers list. He’s a bit withdrawn and quiet, awkward with making friends.
— wanted connections / plots
-One night stands, ex-lovers, hook-ups, flings -Unlikely friends that contrast his shy & sometimes boring demeanor -Drinking buddies -Folks who know about his father’s mysterious death -Someone who watches his 5 cats when he’s away -Fans of his illustration work  -Unlikely rivals turned friends (turned… lovers??) -Extended family on his mother’s side
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thesinglesjukebox · 4 months
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DRAKE FT. SEXYY RED & SZA - "RICH BABY DADDY"
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Okay, we'll admit it. The main reason we came back is that, if we didn't, we would've gone a year where we didn't cover a Drake single, and that just felt so wrong...
[4.81]
Daniel Montesinos-Donaghy: This should be the slammiest of all the dunks. Drake -- you know him, he's well past his peak but can still afford a banger when he puts his account to it! Sexyy Red -- the summer was hers! SZA, the biggest star out! Miami bass music! The title! All the names are on the poster, promising a good ass time, but we never get there. It's a summer blockbuster pushed to October for a reason, and is way too frigid to get this writer's ass moving. First kid on YouTube to upload a [BASS BOOSTED] edit moves this joint up a point, although the bass was the whole fuckin' point in the first place. [3]
Tim de Reuse: You can call it "a consequence of being overplayed" or "so many people copied him that now he sounds boring" or whatever. All I know is that trying to think of words to describe Drake in December of 2023 is like pulling teeth. It's standard atmospheric pressure -- it's a medium-sized red delicious apple -- it's a glass of tap water. I am listening as hard as I can, and I cannot hear anything. [3]
Andrew Karpan: The first thing I think about when I think about "Rich Baby Daddy" is the uncredited voice of Jessica Domingo, because it's literally the first thing on there. Processed to sound almost as if being sung behind a waterfall, Domingo's voice registers at the very volume and pitch of distance, a recurring gesture for voices like these in the Drake oeuvre. The best part about these songs is that they are always the sum total of their parts, so they can really be appreciated like this; something Drizzy himself realized a while back too, when he started sorting and rearranging them for curatorial effect. In a sea of wobbly fashionable Miami bass, the bars he picks up here from Sexyy Red don't feel out of place next to his own unrelated internal monologue, nor next to the patched-in haunted refrain from SZA, a miracle get that impresses because it is impressive. His otherwise unexplained deliberate misreading of a decade-old Florence + the Machine record that acts as a kind of perplexing coda eventually begins to make sense too, if you listen to it a few hundred times like I did. [9]
Katherine St Asaph: In three years we're going to learn that this was originally a SZA solo track that Drake hijacked for himself, like Rihanna's recording of "Consideration", right? I need to believe this so I can justify this score to myself. [5]
Michelle Myers: It's a dark truth that many of Drake's best songs involved vampirically swagger-jacking some up-and-coming rapper with local buzz or a viral track. Here, he attempts to harness Sexyy Red's gloriously blunt charisma and ends up utterly upstaged. Red lets herself soften against a skittery, femme club beat, her voice crackling warmly as she interpolates her own damn song. SZA sounds like a 1996 album-cut hidden gem sped up and resurrected by a Zoomer with 15 million TikTok followers. And then there's fucking Drake, increasingly bitter and out-of-touch, having long lost whatever soft-hearted charm I saw in him a decade ago. His verses are the musical equivalent of thirtysomething white ladies who write songs about skinny jeans and side-parts, embarrassing for all of us. [6]
Taylor Alatorre: A soundtrack to the approaching millennial midlife crisis that's so candid in its thirsty stabbing at relevance that I can't help but cheer for it, or feel sorry for it, or both. On a formal level, "Rich Baby Daddy" is nowhere near as elegant as its obvious predecessors, "In My Feelings" and "Nice for What," but after repeat listening, that messiness, that feeling of being pulled in several different directions at once, starts to feel like a deliberate choice. The guest stars, who were recruited with that in mind, go even further by alternately supporting and undermining Drake's intended displays of mastery over female sexuality. Sexyy Red pays her requisite homage unflinchingly, with a leisurely cadence more suited for a block party than a marquee album, while SZA disrupts the prebuilt Madonna-whore duality by crashing out of the gate with "I need a dick and conversation," all while sounding like she's being launched on a lily pad toward the heavens. The strip-club-in-a-water-level sonics add some emotional texture to what would otherwise be an explosion of untrimmed id, somewhat easing the transition into the stupid-on-paper "post-nut clarity" outro. As laughable as that concept may be, it evokes the yearning post-adolescence of "old Drake" as much as the Florence interpolation does, and just like Mr. Last Name Ever himself, I can't call myself immune to the periodic desire to go back, back to 2009. [8]
Ian Mathers: I know we're not predisposed to like Fucking Drake around here, but the processing on his chorus vocals is the most off-putting I've heard in a while. And not because they've cranked the Auto-Tune or whatever up too far -- I've heard and loved more pronounced examples of that -- but because they've somehow managed to produce the world's deepest whine. At least he's barely here, ceding most of the track to a high-effort-for-low-reward Sexyy Red performance. SZA is much better but barely shows up, which is probably the right move. And then Fucking Drake comes back to just "sing" Florence + the Machine for a bit! Every bit of shit we've ever talked was justified. [2]
Tara Hillegeist: Not even Drake sounding the most alive and enjoying-himself and hands down the funniest guest bars anyone's ever contributed to a Drake chorus can fully save this song from the depths of antipathy carved into my psyche by several years of Fucking Drake too many, but credit where it's due: I haven't left a track from Degrassi's own Jimmy Brooks feeling this genuinely entertained by what I just heard since "Started from the Bottom". And that's impressive, considering this is a track where I had to hear him mumble-singing soulfully about the emotional impact of post-nut clarity. [6]
Will Adams: So many elements working against this -- abrupt instrumental breaks; SZA's verse sounding like it was pasted on with Elmer's; left-field Florence interpolation; Drake in general -- but Sexyy Red's hook is indelible. Sometimes that's all you need. [6]
Crystal Leww: "Shake that ass for Drake, now shake that ass for me" are some of the funniest instructions ever doled out on a Drake song, which is an accomplishment if you consider how long Drake has been around. Drake is essential to this song if only for those lines. [6]
Aaron Bergstrom: I am willing to consider shaking my ass for Sexyy Red. Under no circumstances will I shake my ass for Drake. [3]
Nortey Dowuona: Drake is a bad rapper. No matter what his stans, Lil Yachty, DJ Wackademics, or me in 2013 will tell you, dude is an inescapably clumsy, artless witless hack whose only talent is in co-opting more complex and dedicated art to make it more comfy and accessible to people who would never sincerely engage with what he does. Kanye has been sadder and more earnest. Phonte has been more honest and clever. Lauryn Hill did his whole schtick so well both he and Kanye keep riding off her songs. The only thing he had is that he made music that women liked, that spoke to women in a way it could never do so for dorks like us. And now he's making flat, wan Earl Sweatshirt songs for people who hate Earl and people who hate women period. Sexyy Red's verse is clumsy too, but it's charming and earnest, and the SZA verse is entrancing, vivid and stunning. The line "I got a feeling this is more than what we both say" contains more genuine worry, fear and hope than this hack has done in his whole career. Please, pretty please, buy SOS on vinyl, buy a record player, learn a trade, call your mom and tell her you love her, tell her you are so grateful for staying with you and loving you. Hell, click off this website. Just do not play a song where the most heterosexual man on the face of the earth tries to convince you that he can teach you to -- [3]
Joshua Minsoo Kim: I've spent the past few months thinking about lovers' rock and pagode romântico through the lens of bell hooks' idea of "loving Blackness as political resistance." It was "Rich Baby Daddy" that made me start doing the same for Atlanta bass. Drake seems as good enough a launchpad for all this ruminating -- how often have I seen men refer to his "softer" songs as being "for the girls"? How much of romance is coded across gender lines? Of course, Drake is a manipulative shithead, and it's Sexyy Red who provides the most loving lyric we've heard in any of his songs: an ostensible call to embrace something approaching bisexuality. Too bad Drake opts for another beat-switch gimmick as an excuse to exert his fragile masculinity. Like, how are you gonna follow up, "Shake that ass for Drake, now shake that ass for me" with "You ain't even know how to suck it right." [5]
Brad Shoup: I know how this sounds, but this needed... more Drake? More of the first-verse Drake, anyway: skipping and bobbing, fully devoted on a threeway Miami bass ballad that has exhaling synths straight out of Cupid & Psyche 85. Hell yes, give me all you got. Instead, he dips until the beat switch gives him something properly sluggish. How do you fuck up a verse that interpolates Florence and uses the phrase "post-nut clarity"? He was positively panting earlier; now he's talking about sex like he's issuing a Q3 performance review. [5]
Alfred Soto: Drake drawls shit like "You ain't even know how to suck it right" like a PE coach in a locker room and disappears to let Sexyy Red shout undeserving orders. Nice life! [2]
Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: Here, Drake turns his complete inertness into an advantage: he does his best Sexyy Red impression here and sings some truly brain-dead riffs on Florence + the Machine, but otherwise abandons his own song in favor of his more interesting guests. It's an interesting move from a guy once known for using features to take over songs completely -- interesting more in the meta-pop context than in the song itself, of course, but a decade and a half in to our coverage of Fucking Drake, we ought to be finding new angles when we can. [5]
[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox ]
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redwineconversation · 4 months
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Lyon - Guincamp Preview / Lyon - St Polten Postgame Thoughts
I think there is a genuine case to be made if you say the St Polten game was the worse game Lyon has played all season, which is saying something because we had just suffered through the Dijon game a few days earlier.
It was a boring game, none of the Lyon players were good, and it was really a case of whom was least bad rather than actually good. Van de Donk and Bacha deserved their respective Player of the Match trophies, although I do think Bacha should have swept it, as much as that will upset van de Donk's nutcase stans. Anyway, those two players were good, the rest should be graded on a scale of "not bad" to "they made me wish I could be drinking at work".
People were ripping into Carpenter's "crosses", and I am using quotation marks deliberately, and let's be frank. They weren't wrong to do so. The day Carpenter crosses accurately is the day I will finally know peace. I long for that day. I truly do think it will even happen one day, and I just hope I am alive to see it happen.
But she wasn't the worse player on the pitch, and that's why certain fans screaming that Sombath should be starting over her really perplexed me. Sombath doesn't have the maturity or physicality to handle pressure from high intensity teams. Yes, Sombath can hold her own against the likes of Dijon, but against the heavy weights? We just have to look at what happened to Lyon last season when Carpenter was out to answer that question.
The other reason I am slightly perplexed at the screaming towards Carpenter is, well, she was also doing her job as a defender. I feel a lot of the time when Carpenter abides by her job description, which is to actually defend, people start breathing very heavily into a brown paper bag because she is not contributing to the attack. Yes, I like Carpenter and Diani's overlapping runs. You know what I also like? Defenders who do their job.
Does Carpenter have room to improve? Yes. Will there ever be a day when she can cross accurately? Who knows. But her experience and ability to handle high pressure games puts her above Sombath. Just because Sombath scored a couple of goals against relegation level teams doesn't automatically qualify her as a starter. Let's not offend anyone's intelligence by pretending otherwise.
For me, the one who deserves proper criticism in the St Polten game is Hegerberg. I struggle to remember a performance as bad as that one. There were absolutely no excuses for that kind of misses. She was missing passes, her shots were off, her timing was off. Everything was off, even her attitude. It was an atrocious performance from her. Let's be frank here and now: a player who puts up that kind of performance deserves to be benched for the next game.
Which leads us to the Guincamp ("EAG") dilemma, aka how many bad decisions can Bompastor possibly make before I open a bottle of wine regardless of the time of day.
Gilles was released early to join the Canada WNT camp. Now, this is emotionally conflicting for a variety of reasons. Positives: I don't want Gilles run into the ground and therefore am supportive of giving her breathing time whenever possible; the only way M'Bock will get back to match fitness is to actually play 90 minutes. I am supportive and agree with both those arguments.
But: if Lyon is releasing Gilles early to join the Canada camp, why aren't they also releasing Carpenter as well, since Canada will be playing against Australia? I don't have the exact numbers in front of me but I don't believe that Gilles has played a dramatically superior number of games than Carpenter has, so the excuse of resting Gilles ahead of the international break ahead of Carpenter is perplexing since they will be traveling the same distance. Literally.
The second thing is, Bompastor argued that the players who played little to no minutes against St Polten will be starting against Guincamp. Based on that argument, Sombath is starting over Carpenter since Carpenter started the St Polten game. In that case, again, why not release Carpenter rather than have her start on the bench? The reverse holds true: if Carpenter starts, then why have released Gilles early?
Though maybe Bompastor is keeping some of her typical starters on hand because she too remembers the horror show against Dijon, as much as we would all like to put that collective nightmare performance behind us. And this is something else I want to talk about because the Twitter analysts are really getting on my nerves here.
Becho is not a starter. This isn't even me being biased. Camille Abily said as much: Becho isn't there yet as a starter. Abily can see it but for some reason Bompastor decided otherwise and we got the absolute horror show that was her performance against Dijon. Are we supposed to sit here and pretend that within the space of 10 days, which included a UWCL game, Becho developed the nerves and maturity to start?
Now, if she scores a hat trick in the first half, I will gladly admit that I was wrong and that Abily's judgment was off, too. I am willing to recognize my mistakes. But as things stand here and now, Becho has proven consistently that she is not fit to start. Dijon showed us as much. Guincamp will most likely show us the same.
Third problem: Dijon also showed us what happens when Marozsan and Majri start. The midfield's performance against Dijon was atrocious. It was horrible. They could not string passes together, they moved with the same pace and intensity as LA traffic at rush hour on a Friday afternoon. Bompastor had to throw on Horan and van de Donk to save face, and we're most likely going to get a repeat of that against Guingamp.
Which again is conflicting: I don't want van de Donk and Horan to be run into ground what with both of them being part of the stronger midfield; I don't want to have to suffer through Dijon 2.1 (St Polten being Dijon 2.0). We shouldn't be in a situation where we have to rely on van de Donk and Horan to save us because the remaining offensive midfielders haven't run since circa 2019.
Now, for all the complaining I am doing about Lyon's performance, I will also - grudgingly - acknowledge that it's harder on Lyon to play freely when they're up against 5-4-1 formation. Low blocks are harder to break down, it's frustrating to play against teams whose sole ambition is to park the bus, blah blah. I get that. I agree with it.
I also don't think it excuses Lyon's performances against Dijon and St Polten, and it won't be an excuse against Guingamp (whom if I remember correctly, Lyon drew against last season, so we really do need to prepare ourselves for a third horror show performance in 10 days).
Lyon is a team more or less stacked with experienced international players. It would be great if, for the first time in 10 days, Lyon would act like a team more or less stacked with experienced international players.
Anyway, that's that. Thanksgiving break is over so I will be getting back to my unpaid hobby of translating Lyon content so people can see this frustrating but complex team the way I do.
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arealcrow · 2 years
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For Adina- multiples of 5 :3
thank youuuuu, im handing adina to you like a freshly picked fruit
5. How easy is it to earn their mistrust?
soo extremely easy. he's built the great wall of st. carmine around his heart and he evicts people from his inner circle without mercy.
10. What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them?
adina hates liars. adina also lies constantly, and that fact in and of itself haunts him. there's two lies in specific that would haunt him the most, and theyre also the ones he's told the most. the first one, to his family, that it doesn't bother him to do the dirty work that comes along with their business. the second one, to himself, that he doesn't care about the people he meets and the people he hurts while doing that dirty work. in order to take some of the pressure off of his mom and prove his worth as her golden child, as well as protect his sister from having to experience the kind of violence he saw on a regular basis, he closed himself off to a lot of connection and feeling. on some level he definitely realizes and regrets it.
15. How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first?
combination of both. he definitely prepares certain bits in his head, it's just a reflex as he reflects on previous conversations and thinks over what he would have said better. those bits and pieces of prepared things get filed away in his head to pull out between things he's thinking on the spot.
20. If they were asked to explain the difference between romantic and platonic or familial love, how would they do so?
at the present moment? i don't think he could. all he's had before is family
25. What are their thoughts on marriage?
despite the shambles his parent's marriage ended in, he's secretly a little romantic at heart. he wants the biggest, most extravagant wedding you could imagine. has to be big enough to match how big his heart is..
30. Who do they most regret meeting?
can i say his dad? this is an orynaryn velrune hate account
35. How do they treat the things their friends come to them excited about? Are they supportive?
he's So supportive, he's gonna make a big fucking deal about it. even if its not a big deal he's gonna be full overbearing older brother about it. we're going out for ice cream/pizza/to vandalize something/climb somewhere we should be climbing/laser tag to celebrate.
40. How sensitive are they to their own flaws?
he's extremely sensitive to his own flaws and failures (': the stakes have always been high for him- whether it was maintaining the family reputation before, or now trying to keep himself and his sister safe- so he's extremely critical of himself and any mistakes he might make. he keeps a good poker face about it, but he's very hard on himself in private.
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j-deverill · 2 years
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( cis man | he/him | archie renaux ) —— isn’t that jai deverill? yeah that is them, outside the leaky cauldron! they used to be in slytherin but apparently they now work as a mediwizard at st. mungo's. they always seemed to remind me of straight bourbon, rolled up sleeves of a crisp white dress shirt, beat up boxing gloves, wrapped knuckles & lipstick stained skin, which seems about right. anyway i’ve heard they’re still a bit charming, sarcastic, and loyal. they’re twenty-two now but some things never change! i wonder how being a half-blood is affecting them after school,  especially now they’re neutral (order bias)? when was it they graduated again, 1974? has it really been that long...
about jai
full name: jai zaiden deverill
age: 22
birthday: august 1. 1956
zodiac: leo
gender: cis male
sexuality: bisexual 
blood status: half-blood 
job: mediwizard 
former school: hogwarts (slytherin house)
birthplace: london, uk 
biography
jai zaiden deverill was born to two wizarding parents, both of which had prayed that their son had magic like they did. jai’s grandmother, his father’s mother, was a muggle, and while his father’s family had old money, making them extremely wealthy in the muggle world, but in the wizarding world? they were practically nothing. it gave his parents a bit of a complex when he was growing up, and while jai didn’t fault them for it, he did feel a certain kind of pressure to be someone bigger than who he became. 
at hogwarts, he was sorted into slytherin, and if he’d been a pureblood, he was sure that he would have fit right in, but he’d always felt a little out of place despite it all. it was why he developed a reputation for being a charmer, a flirt. if he could hide behind flirtatious comments and lustful gazes, no one would be able to notice how much of an outsider he felt he was. the only place where he didn’t feel othered was the quidditch field. he played as a chaser for the slytherin team from his third year at hogwarts until his last, where he suffered an injury that kept him from playing the rest of the season, and changed his entire view on the game. it took him years before he actually stepped back out onto a pitch.
after hogwarts, when his parents had decided that he would never live up to the expectations that they have set before him, he decided that he wasn’t going to allow them to dictate what he did with his life. instead, he chose something (for the first time) that was solely for him. he started training at st. mungo’s, and for the first time in his life, he felt as though he was actually helping people. this was the more that his parents had wanted for him, even if it wasn’t what they had pictured. 
he realized he could do something with the training, and despite his drawbacks, he decided to put his work at st. mungo’s and his love for quidditch and combined them. he now works for multiple quidditch teams as their mediwizard, where he works with injuries and anything else that they might need medically. 
personality
jai is a MAJOR flirt. if you’re breathing, he’s flirting. he does not have any boundaries and he likes sexy time
he is very loyal to those he cares about. if he were to take the pottermore quiz, slytherin would be his first house, but gryffindor would be a close second. 
he loves a good party! 
sometimes, he feels as though he’s not good enough for most people and places. he pushes himself to belong and make people happy, which in turn makes him more unhappy. it’s a vicious cycle he’s working hard to overcome. honestly, he just hasn’t let go of his teenage angst. someone help him :\
while he is a flirt, he also cares/loves very deeply. 
misc
since he doesn’t play quidditch anymore, but still likes to keep in shape, he likes to run (he has his own route he uses every morning) and he likes to box. his knuckles are always a little battered from the punching bag. 
his favorite color is midnight blue.
he knows how to play piano and the violin, courtesy of his grandmother, who insisted that he had a musical skill when he was a child 
his favorite class at hogwarts was charms 
he has an owl named ares, a black-banded owl he got when he was eleven
he is pretty neutral about the death eaters/order of the phoenix situation, but he leans more toward the latter because of his blood status, and has been treated poorly by purebloods both in the past and presently
possible connections
i’m down for any and all connections you guys can think of, but here are a few that might get the ball rolling :)
former fwbs/current fwbs
best friends
casual acquaintances 
frenemies/enemies
workout buddies (either running or boxing)
former classmates
really anything you can come up with, i’m pretty down for :)
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the-firebird69 · 2 years
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This is my lawyer and he feels great today and it says I feel powerful and I said you should they're affecting great change and you're changing our motive motif a little bit and modus and it is going to start focusing on the government more
Zues Hera
That is me that's the character and I look a little like it as a lawyer I'm kind of a little fat and short they think I'm a little mac and I'm attacking them today in Marlborough Massachusetts and in Boston Massachusetts at St Elizabeth's and I'm attacking them at the hospital in the low desert Coachella valley and I'm attacking them at Worcester and he said there was an issue there they're doing something very illegal harassing and threatening him with death and sitting him with terrorists and the way they got him in there was inappropriate as well and the way that the policemen treated him was inappropriate as well and it was Ken and he's willing to testify with a certain immunity and will grant that to him and we had told them before but he's losing his shirt now and he gets it they're going to go until the end of all this stuff so we're bringing suit against them and the state of Massachusetts because it's a state hospital and we're bringing suit against unlawful imprisonment and of a G6 and the boobs can't hardly figure it out so they're going around about it and today I heard them say this we're going to go down for this and he's going to take us down for this so we have to do something so assuming I'm here we know who they are. We're also suing them for harming his family some of the hospitals were going after his family and we have the one tape and we have witnesses and we had Private eyes research it that's what we call them and we can't stand you so dumb you put it out in the open and you blasphemy and that's how it is you get caught.
There are a few things about what's your state what's your UMass hospital the people should know about they had a fight between Worcester State hospital in westborough and UMass and it exposed tons of stuff and it's what they're using the hospital for and it's Tommy Allen who was exposed in the basement was trying to capture a son and he was doing it up there at westboro State hospital too and they knew about it and they let it ride then they started going after him because he was riding on them that was only after both what they're doing is extremely illegal and extremely legal means it was homicide of course so there are tens of thousands of people who want revenge on them and was signing them up for a class action today they lost relatives there and they understand how and they understand who we have video tapes to them doing it and witnesses anybody who lost somebody any of these hospitals our son was in or because of the hospitalization and the staff there please feel free to sign up for our class actions and if you have any information at all let us know even if you have Justin name of your relative we'll be happy to take the on the case and to nail them for you.
Each and every interview to put our son into a hospital was flawed intrinsically at UMass they just sat there pressuring him and he said you're not going to let me go no matter what I say and they said no I said you know that's illegal they said we're not aware of that I said yeah you can go to jail for it he actually put that person in jail he's so mad that he killed himself I pulled them out and got the Intel so he's in our possession and he's about to die and he said so look now you're dead I said you said jail when I said that happened too okay Buddy Jesus you're a f****** loser your people are losers bye-bye.... And the guy died our son was saying that to him all he was thinking was I'm a loser then he burst on said I'm going to make you lose then and started blabbing we got free information when we said it as he was being burned alive by the way whole.
So don't think we're going to walk away if you send me a letter or something stupid like that most letters I ignore and we just file just read it real quick and file it or have someone read it actually all of them are read by someone else you send me junk mail or junk letters we're at your doorstep and minutes
Bitol and Goddess Wife
Well your buddies doing stuff and rode it for you and you
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t0rschlusspan1k · 5 days
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The Telegraph | 'God told us to exorcise my daughter's demons. I don't regret her death'
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By Elizabeth Day
27 November 2005 • 12:01am
[...] From the very beginning, Anneliese's life was governed by fear. Her family was deeply religious. Her father had considered training as a priest and three of her aunts were nuns. But the Michels had a secret. In 1948, Anneliese's mother gave birth to an illegitimate daughter, Martha, bringing such disgrace on her family that she was forced to wear a black veil on her wedding day. When Anneliese was born in 1952, her mother encouraged her to atone for the sins of illegitimacy through fervent devotion. But when Martha was eight, she died from complications arising from an operation to remove a kidney tumour. Anneliese, a kind-hearted and deeply sensitive girl, must have felt ever more strongly the pressure to do penance for her mother.
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She found herself increasingly surrounded by evidence of sinfulness and increasingly anxious to be rid of it. While other children in the 1960s were rebelling testing the limits of their freedom, Anneliese slept on a bare stone floor to atone for the sins of the drug addicts who slept rough at the local train station. In 1968, aged 17, she began to suffer convulsions. Although initially diagnosed with grand mal epilepsy, she started experiencing devilish hallucinations while praying. By 1973, she was suffering severe depression and considering suicide. Voices in her head told her she was damned. She asked the local priest for exorcism and was twice refused. But gradually, Anneliese slipped further into the abyss. She would perform 600 genuflections a day, eventually rupturing her knee ligaments. [...]
In 1975, her third request for exorcism was granted by the Bishop of Wurzburg. "I don't regret it," says Anna Michel firmly. "There was no other way." We shall never know if there was. By this stage, Anneliese had refused further medical intervention from the Psychiatric Clinic Wurzburg. Her symptoms have subsequently been compared to schizophrenia and should have responded to treatment. There has also been speculation that Anneliese might have been influenced by the release of William Friedkin's The Exorcist, in 1973. But whatever lay behind her disturbance, the exorcism could have caused Anneliese to believe her own hallucinations. [...] Her parents buried her next to Martha at the outer edges of the cemetery - ground normally reserved for illegitimate children and suicides. Even in death, Anneliese was not free of the sinfulness she fought so hard to repent of. Today, the 2000 inhabitants of Klingenberg are unwilling to speak of Anneliese Michel. A gentle enquiry to passers-by is greeted with hostile glares and a shake of the head. "The town is ashamed," says Christiana Metzler, 42, who works in the tourist office. "I was at school when it happened and there were a lot of things covered up. People don't want to talk about it. There is a feeling that it was the parents' fault because they were so religious they didn't see what was happening. Sometimes Catholic pilgrims come to her grave because they think she can save lost souls. But there are not many of them. Now there is this film coming out, we are worried it will all be stirred up again."
It is a past that the Church is ashamed of, too. In 1984, German bishops petitioned Rome to review the exorcism rite in the light of the Michel case. Although their recommendations were not adopted, the Vatican published a revised exorcism rite in 1999 - the first update since the 17th century - and has introduced a qualification in exorcism that maks priests undergo medical training. "I wouldn't have carried out the exorcism [on Anneliese Michel]," admits Fr Dieter Feineis, the current priest at St Pankratius Church in Klingenberg. "But both Anna Michel and her husband remained absolutely convinced that what they had done was right. The view of the Church is that it is possible to be possessed, but in Germany there are no more exorcisms." In Italy, however, it is a different matter. According to the Italian Association of Psychiatrists and Psychologists, half a million Italians seek exorcisms each year. There are about 350 practising exorcists worldwide. Earlier this year, a priest and several nuns in a Romanian Orthodox convent in Tanacu believed that Maricia Irina Cornici, a 23-year-old nun, was possessed. They carried out an exorcism ritual and tied her to a cross, pushing a towel in her mouth and denying her food or water, She was dead three days later. [...]
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badassbutterfly1987 · 3 months
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2023 Book Reviews (July to December)
5 stars
- Midwives (Bohjalian, 1997): A midwife is accused of negligence and manslaughter after a woman in her care dies during a home birth. The mother seemingly had a stroke and an emergency C-section was required to save the baby; the question is raised if she was indeed dead when the C-section happened or if the midwife had accidentally killed her, as well if the mother was even healthy enough to be having a home birth far from a hospital. Told from the perspective of the midwife’s teenage daughter.
- Raptor Red (Bakker, 1995): Follows a year in the life of a female Utahraptor, drawing inspiration from various paleontology theories at the time. Think Meerkat Manor but about a raptor and her family. Obviously I loved it.
3 stars
- The Haunting of Maddy Clare (Simone St James, 2012): the ghost stuff was mostly well done. Maddy is angry and hurting and I don't blame her for being so hostile. Didn't like her dialogue, it felt very "Crazy=Dangerous=Monster" in a way that just felt generic horror villain which doesn't sit right knowing that this is a traumatized victim. Sarah and Matthew have a Hallmark-level romance but it isn't even decent Hallmark. Every conversation until the last third features some kind of misunderstanding they don't resolve. First sex scene between the leads is technically okay but the complete lack of communication makes consent feel more dubious (just because Sarah’s inner dialogue is fine with it, doesn’t make Matthew’s lack of even checking in okay, especially in light of their repeated misunderstandings). The post-WWI trauma was pleasantly well-done, physical disabilities in Matthew and Alistair were a more mixed bag.
2 stars
- In the Shadow of the Throne (Kate Sheridan, 2022): I really wanted to like this graphic novel. It’s cute and gay and a teen boy is isekai’d to a fantasy world but there’s not much substance. Not nearly enough time to hit all the plot points so everything feels rushed; dialogue and relationships don’t proceed naturally. Art style is nice at least.
Nonfiction: 
- Monsters in the Movies: 100 Years of Cinematic Nightmares (Landis, 2011): Encyclopedia of horror and horror-adjacent movies that author has seen. He shares his opinions on them but offers little beyond surface analysis. 
- Living with Cannibals and Other Women’s Adventures (Michele Slung, 2000): Introduction to various female explorers. Decent intro but each chapter felt like a basic book report on each woman.
- The Complete Beginner’s Guide to Drawing Manga (Sonia Leong, 2023): Good lessons here for anyone interesting in the subject. 
- Trans and Autistic (Noah Adams + Bridget Liang, 2020): The experiences of people who are both trans and autistic and how those parts of their identity have afffected their lives. Definitely of interest to me as someone who is definitely one and possibly the other as well.
- A Wolf Called Romeo (Nick Jans, 2014): About a lone wolf in Alaska who was chill with people and really just wanted to play with the local dogs; fair warning the ending made me cry.
- Becoming Nicole (Amy Ellis Nutt, 2015): The life story of transgender actress and activist Nicole Maines.
- Notes from a Sickbed (Tessa Brunton, 2022): a graphic novel about the author’s experiences with chronic fatigue syndrome.
- Little Girls in Pretty Boxes (Joan Ryan, 1995): about the pressure put on young girls and teenagers in competitive gymnastics and iceskating (especially those aiming for the Olympics), and the consequences of that pressure.
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asa-m-holland · 9 months
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A S A H O L L A N D
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S T A T S
Character Name: Asa Holland Character Age: 45 Character Birthday: October 25, 1978 Gender & Pronouns: Cis man, He/Him Sexuality: Gay Occupation: Head Librarian Face Claim: Andrew Scott
FULL BIO:  
Full bio is under the cut- please be conscious of any trigger warnings before proceeding!
TW // Abuse, Homophobia
Asa grew up in a small family home in a town on the outskirts of Dublin. Both parents were devoutly Catholic and the whole family walked to church 3 times a week. He worked summers helping clean up the little church-house in the valley and his father often pawned him off to ‘learn a hard day’s work’ at various places in town, making pennies to take home. Despite his father having plenty of money and working at a bank in the city, Asa was often treated like he had to provide for his family as well. He wanted to spend time with his siblings but it often fell on him to get a job first, to get his license, to get into college. There was immense pressure from his family at all times to be the model son. He had always been introverted but starting in high school, he started to rebel, getting angry at his parents and lashing out at them. His father had just started a very high-profile job in the government and his 13 year old son was the least of his issues.
Eventually, Asa was sent away to a place for ‘troubled children’ and was essentially beaten into submission by orderlies and people who did not care about his wellbeing or his mental stability. He was treated like a problem, like an inmate in a prison at the age of 14 and was kept there for years due to his father’s negligence and lies. Saying after Asa came back for a short time once that he was still ‘acting up’ and ‘deranged’. That they had failed and he would expose them if they didn’t take Asa back.Through it all, Asa was manipulated into thinking he was the problem. That he had done so much wrong that he was being punished, and would continue to be for the rest of his life- tormented by the Devil. Because of the severe mistreatment he’d faced, his father continued the manipulation- Asa was in and out of a few psychiatric facilities, severely depressed, and lost in his own life. His father was a constant terrifying presence in his life, shipping him out to the army to try and ‘straighten him out’ even after briefly coming back from the many places he’d stayed in.
Asa came back with numerous injuries, a medical background from being taught by the chief medic, and a ton of nightmares. But even after that, his father continued to assert his son’s need to be tucked away somewhere ‘safe’. After years of this, Asa left- heading to London where he could try to start his own life over. After moving, he worked a few odd jobs to make ends meet, and would take server jobs, desk jobs, data entry- anything that would pay the bills.
A few years after he had moved, Asa began crafting a case to close down St. Irene’s, the terrible place he’d been locked in for years. With the help of other former patients, he successfully sued the hospital and had it shut down- he and many patients were given huge payouts and suddenly Asa didn’t HAVE to work. The man had worked from the ground up on the entire case, leaving no stone unturned. He poured everything into organizing every paper, letter, and piece of evidence with forensic background into showing St. Irene for what it was. After moving to London, he found himself working in a library, sorting books and organizing. The kind old woman who ran the place soon had him doing just about everything, until she decided to retire. Now Asa runs the entire place, taking care of inventory, scheduling of his volunteers and staff, events, and acquisition of books. 
Headcanons:
-Asa is an incredibly off-putting individual, due to his time away from ‘society’. While he tries to make conversation with others, it is clear he is still figuring out how to make friends and to have relationships.
-Despite how he appears, Asa spends a lot of his time in the arts. He enjoys books, painting, and plants, and will often be found on his front patio with his watercolors. He has rescued many cats that all live in his surprisingly beautiful and eclectic home.
-While he is an enigma wrapped in another enigma, Asa is a kind person. He often is thoughtful in small ways- having everyones’ coffee orders pegged on his bulletin board in his office, sending small and odd cards for birthdays and events. 
-A large part of his being sent away was not only his rebellious adolescence but also that his father found out pretty early on that his son was gay. Asa hadn’t told him, but his father found a few things- letters from an old boyfriend, some magazines.
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aguirreho · 1 year
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Decreasing Office Stress With Funny Trophy Awards
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asa--holland · 9 months
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A S A H O L L A N D
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BASICS
Age: 45 Birthday: October 25, 1978 Gender & Pronouns: Cis man, He/Him Sexuality: Gay Occupation: Head Librarian District: Washington Park Face Claim: Andrew Scott
Full Bio under a Read More due to some adult themes, please be aware of any trigger warnings!
BIO:  TW // Abuse, Homophobia
Asa grew up in a small family home in a town on the outskirts of Dublin. Both parents were devoutly Catholic and the whole family walked to church 3 times a week. He worked summers helping clean up the little church-house in the valley and his father often pawned him off to ‘learn a hard day’s work’ at various places in town, making pennies to take home. Despite his father having plenty of money and working at a bank in the city, Asa was often treated like he had to provide for his family as well. He wanted to spend time with his siblings but it often fell on him to get a job first, to get his license, to get into college. There was immense pressure from his family at all times to be the model son. He had always been introverted but starting in high school, he started to rebel, getting angry at his parents and lashing out at them. His father had just started a very high-profile job in the government and his 13 year old son was the least of his issues. 
Eventually, Asa was sent away to a place for ‘troubled children’ and was essentially beaten into submission by orderlies and people who did not care about his wellbeing or his mental stability. He was treated like a problem, like an inmate in a prison at the age of 14 and was kept there for years due to his father’s negligence and lies. Saying after Asa came back for a short time once that he was still ‘acting up’ and ‘deranged’. That they had failed and he would expose them if they didn’t take Asa back. Through it all, Asa was manipulated into thinking he was the problem. That he had done so much wrong that he was being punished, and would continue to be for the rest of his life- tormented by the Devil. Because of the severe mistreatment he’d faced, his father continued the manipulation- Asa was in and out of a few psychiatric facilities, severely depressed, and lost in his own life. His father was a constant terrifying presence in his life, shipping him out to the army to try and ‘straighten him out’ even after briefly coming back from the many places he’d stayed in.
 Asa came back with numerous injuries, a medical background from being taught by the chief medic, and a ton of nightmares. In a desperate bid for freedom, Asa decided to run off with what money he had and move. After flying to the first place he'd spotted on a list of cheap flights, he worked a few odd jobs to make ends meet, and would take server jobs, desk jobs, data entry- anything that would pay the bills.
A few years after he moved, Asa began crafting a case to close down St. Irene’s, the terrible place he’d been locked in for years. With the help of other former patients, he successfully sued the hospital and had it shut down- he and many patients were given huge payouts and suddenly Asa didn’t HAVE to work. But he found he had a knack for organization and lists, and began working at the library. In the past few years he's taken over as the head librarian and many know his face around Denver now. In his spare time he enjoys painting and gardening.
Headcanons:
-Asa is an incredibly off-putting individual, due to his time away from ‘society’. While he tries to make conversation with others, it is clear he is still figuring out how to make friends and to have relationships.
-Despite how he appears, Asa spends a lot of his time in the arts. He enjoys books, painting, and plants, and will often be found on his front patio with his watercolors. He has rescued many cats that all live in his surprisingly beautiful and eclectic home.
-While he is an enigma wrapped in another enigma, Asa is a kind person. He often is thoughtful in small ways- having everyones’ coffee orders pegged on his bulletin board in his office, sending small and odd cards for birthdays and events. On the other end, Asa’s ‘kindness’ at the library he works at often is seen as disquieting and he is not as great with older folks and children.
-A large part of his being sent away was not only his rebellious adolescence but also that his father found out pretty early on that his son was gay. Asa hadn’t told him, but his father found a few things- letters from an old boyfriend, some magazines. 
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troubatrain · 3 years
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bad behavior - m. tkachuk
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a/n: i don’t know when i started writing consistently but here we are. this another part of this series i was super excited about writing because this song is what put the idea in my head to begin with. quick shout out to @hookingminor​, @tkafuckit​, & @davidpastrsnack​ for reading my work and validating it because i swear i would never finish without you guys sometimes. hope you guys like it!
as per usual i recommend listing to the song while you read!
part of my lovely little lonely series
warnings: smut
“...you tell me, you're insecure, but don't be, stay soft, but don't be gentle, it's altogether mental...” - Bad Behavior - The Maine
I’m not a distraction am I?
Of fucking course you are, Matthew thought, buttoning up his dress shirt while he looked at the fresh marks he bit in your back not even fifteen minutes ago. You were the biggest distraction, Matthew forgoing his pre-game nap just for extra time with you between the sheets. You were a mistake he couldn’t stop making, ignoring the constant pull in his chest whenever you left because you didn’t do anything more than what you gave him.
Really, it was probably karmic punishment for all the shitty things Matthew’s done in his life. The universe would drop his dream girl in front of him but as it turns out, she played the game better than him. It wasn’t like he didn’t get a warning from your best friend Ella who’d been dating Sam from what seemed like the dawn of time. You were a heartbreaker, it was just how it was and that was how it’s going to be. Matthew ignored Ella, taking you home without a second thought because that’s what he wanted too. No Strings Attached. Turns out, he was in over his head when you left one night and the other side of Matthew’s bed felt cold for the first time in his life.
“You’re not a distraction pretty girl,” Matthew nods, curls bouncing against his forehead while he admires you from the otherside of his bedroom, “Are you coming tonight?”
“Are you going to be on your worst behavior?” You ask, rolling out of bed to collect your clothes Matthew never seemed to toss in one place. That’s why you were different, every person in his life telling him to ease up in his game - except you. You loved watching Matthew get into it on the ice because after those games the sex was just better.
Matthew chuckles, watching you unhook your panties from the lamp in the corner of the room and frowning when you saw the tear he ripped in them, “I’ll be on my worst behavior if you’re coming home with me later.”
“Twice in one day is pushing your luck Matthew,” You sigh dramatically, fixing his collar and flattening his tie, “And exhausting for me quite honestly.”
“I’ll be easy,” Matthew suggests, fingers gently pushing a piece of hair from in front of your face. Your eyes flutter shut, enjoying the moment. This made it so hard to keep your distance, the fact that Matthew was more of a gentle giant than he led on most of the time. Sure, he could pull your hair back when he hit it from behind and he made the dirtiest jokes in crowded rooms, but when all was said and done - he was kind. Someone would be lucky to have him one day, but that someone just couldn’t be you.
“You’ve never gone easy on me ever,” You giggle, pressing a kiss against Matthew’s jaw, “Good luck.”
***
Matthew didn’t know why he was so nervous about a silly All Star game, but he was. Maybe it was because it was at home, or maybe Brady’s last minute addition had him reconsidering. Either way, he’d been pacing for the last hour and trying to decide if he should tell you to stay home. He couldn’t do that, as if he was going to deny himself the small sliver of happiness he got every time you decided you wanted to see him. You were in charge, and it changed the playing field for Matthew entirely. It wasn’t like it usually was, Matthew being the one who often found themselves hanging by the phone in hopes you’d call. You didn’t, so Matthew got his hopes up and told you to stop by before he left for St. Louis.
“Hey All Star,” You muse, sneaking inside and taking off your coat. Matthew stops his pacing, smiling to himself that you actually showed up when he asked. No answer to his text, because why would you bother to let him know you were on your way. That would be too easy, and you weren’t by any means easy.
Matthew opened his mouth to ask you how your day was, but shut it once he realized he’d never get an answer. The only things he knew about you were learned from Ella and Sam, not a single detail of anything that happened outside of the walls of Matthew’s apartment was ever mentioned to him by you. You knew tons about him, because he opened up to you so easily it was breaking his heart that you wouldn’t do the same. He wondered why he did this to himself, why he didn’t just find someone who was obsessed with him. He liked the chase, Matthew’s athletic intuitions pushing him to strive for the best prize he could find, and you’d be the best of them all if he could have you.
Instead Matthew did what he always does, he pressed his lips to yours and pushed you up against the door. His hands were on your waist, an ironclad grip as if you’d slip right through his hands if he didn’t stop you. You probably would have.
“What’s wrong?” You question, Matthew confused as to how you knew something was up. His eyebrows furrowed, head cocking to the side like a puppy who was trying to figure out what a new sound was. You laugh, a melodic giggle carrying through Matthew’s almost barren apartment, “Your hands are right above my ass but you failed to touch it once, what’s up?”
“I’m, uh, nervous?” Matthew admits, his weaker parts of his brain succumbing to the pout on your lips. That pout could be what killed him. Matthew wasn’t dealing with it well, it being the newfound pressure he’d been feeling to be a top tier player. People expected him to turn it on for every game, and at first he loved it. Then he realized he no longer got the chance to slack off when all eyes were on him, Matthew had been internally crumbling ever since.
That wasn’t necessarily the only reason he’d been insecure lately. You weren’t helping, but you couldn’t be hurting him that much. Maybe you were. Matthew was trying really hard to be cool, but he was failing miserably. He got jealous more often than he liked to admit, and he was a liar if he didn’t deep dive your Instagram to see if you were very clearly seeing someone else. He was gone a lot, and you didn’t owe him any sort of explanation and he knew that. He knew he respected you enough not to ask but he liked you enough to care, and it was eating him alive.
“Pressure’s a lot, I just don’t feel like, you know,” Matthew explains, fumbling over his words and waving his hands because he didn’t want to say it. His voice got lower, words mumbled together when he spoke, “I’m insecure.”
“Don’t be,” You shrug, a wide confident smile on your face. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t a little surprised by Matthew, because as far as you knew he was a big bad guy, or at least he thought he was. You thought it was all bullshit, but you did often think that kind of pressure couldn’t be healthy. Every fiber of your being told you to run, that this was getting too emotional and if you didn’t stop you were going to ruin him forever. You did it all the time, your heart wasn’t built for more than a night and you were just accepting it. If you weren’t going to be able to stop self destructing anyone who tries to connect to you emotionally besides your loved ones you protected so fiercely - then you were going to have fun.
Which is what you thought you were getting into. You took Matthew home with nothing but his reputation spinning around in your head that he was the perfect conquest. Then you fucked, and it was too good to give up. So you kept him at arms length, never giving into those damn eyes and his frown whenever you left after you had sex. It was better that way, for both of you really.
“That’s all you got for me?” Matthew asks, stifling a laugh at your simple answer. He was admitting to you something he’s never let another soul know but you simply just shrugged.
“Okay, how about this,” You take a deep breath, snaking your hands under his shirt and grazing your nails against his skin.
You’re Matthew fucking Tkachuk. Your lips pressed against his jaw, a smirk gracing his face. You don’t give a fuck who’s in your way, you’ll hit them. Your lips moved to his ear, whispering softly. You’re what Doughty’s nightmares are made of. Your hands slipped down, playing with the waistband on his boxers. And you can score with the best of them, on and off the ice. Matthew laughed at that one, a smug smile back on his face where it rightfully should be. You have nothing to worry about.
Both of Matthew’s large hands landed on your cheeks, calloused fingers rubbing against your skin and his lips on yours. He didn’t need to say anything, he’d show you just how badly he needed that. Matthew pushed you towards his bedroom, your back hitting the plush mattress. You tossed your hoodie off, Matthew losing his at the same time. You admired him, the way his muscles were defined in the moonlight from his windows. Matthew’s hands slid down your back, unclasping your bra with one hand and smirking to himself when it slid off. You stroked his ego for a reason, one that ran a chill up your spine while he pressed kisses down your body.
“You’re fucking sexy,” Matthew mutters into your skin, sliding off your leggings and eyes practically rolling to the back of his head when a pair of lacy red panties caught his attention. His finger slid underneath them, fingers slick from your core, “And wet too huh?”
“Do you plan on doing something about it or should I call someone else,” You tease, Matthew’s free hand gripped your thigh when you spoke, jealousy coursing through his veins. He finger pulled against your panties, a loud rip catching your attention, “Matthew!”
“Don’t joke like that then, I’ll take care of you just fine on my fucking own,” Matthew growls, lips ghosting your clit. You whimper, running a hair through Matthew’s hair. His tongue lapped at your pussy, trying to remind you just why you couldn’t shake him. He was competitive, and if he had to fight for his spot in your line up he’d do it. You were a mess, a string of curses falling through your lips and your moans echoing in the room.
“Matty, fuck,” You let out a cry, gripping his curls tightly. Matthew flicked your clit with his tongue, a gasp leaving your mouth. Matthew went to overdrive, his well skilled tongue moving quickly to send you over the edge. You grinded against his mouth, his hands holding down your waist so he could keep going while you came on his face. You finally push his head back, unable to take anymore.
Matthew crawls back up your body, capturing your lips with his and kicking off his boxers. You push him onto his back gently, a smug smile on his face and his hands landing behind his head, “A show?”
“Shut up,” You shake your head, letting out a laugh while you straddle Matthew. You pumped him a few times, lining his cock up with your pussy and easing yourself onto him.
“You look so good on top of me,” Matthew muses, a cocky tone to his voice. You grab the overgrown curls on the nape of his neck, rolling your hips against him and smirking when a groan left his lips, “My perfect fucking girl.”
Matthew’s hand smacked your ass while you rode him at your own speed. His free hand gripped your hip, speeding up your pace. Matthew loved being on top, a translation of his control that he desperately craved, but he let you do whatever you wanted. His hand snuck up your body, hand gently gripping your neck, “If you leave a mark this time Matthew-”
Matthew chuckles, remembering the borderline vicious threats you sent him the last time his grip got a little too tight and you didn’t realize until the next day. Matthew pulls you down to meet his lips, flipping you over onto your and back wrapping on your legs around his waist. His forehead pressed against yours, something you noticed he'd been doing more often lately, “Cum for me, fuck, c’mon.”
“Harder,” You nod, eager to chase your high and give him what you knew he wanted. He liked to get you off, the satisfaction of pleasing you did it for him, Matthew often bragging about how much a giver he really was. Your pussy fluttered around him, Matthew pulling his cock out and spilling onto your stomach. He looked down at you, completely fucked out with his cum on you like you were his. Your eyes were glassy, lips swollen from his while you caught your breath, “Shit.”
Matthew laughs lightly, walking into the en suite bathroom to get you a towel. He was always gentle afterwards, taking care of you after he absolutely wrecked you as if it was going to remind you that maybe he deserved more than you were giving to anyone else. You tuck your head into Matthew’s pillow, sleep about to take over your body. You never stayed, your own little rule because you just knew if you let him hold you it would be over, “Just stay, you look tired pretty girl.”
Matthew’s voice was gentle, his finger running along your bareback lightly while he offered you a shirt in the other. He wanted you to stay so badly, “Matty-”
“My flight leaves in a few hours, it’s like a nap,” Matthew whispers, and you smile at his excuse for you to sleepover. You nod, sitting up and tossing on whatever gray t-shirt he’d given you. You didn’t know, but it was his favorite shirt in the world, the fabric soft like a tee that had been well loved.
Matthew was supposed to have woken you up before he left, dropping you off at your place before he headed to the airport to go home. He was going to, he swore he really was, but when he was leaving you looked so damn cute snoring away in his favorite shirt. So he left you a note, telling you to lock up before you left and that he’d see you the day he got back. You woke up peacefully, the light shining through the floor to ceiling windows in Matthew’s apartment and rolling your eyes at his note. You grab your phone, smiling when you notice he left it charging for you. 
You told me it was a nap.
Maybe you shouldn’t look so cute when you sleep then.
You roll over screaming in the pillow because you were going to ruin him.
***
Matthew had enough of the waiting game.
It's been nine days since that night and Matthew was losing his fucking mind. He was playing like absolute garbage, his name off the scoresheet since the All Star break. Matthew was lashing out left and right, both against the opposition and his own friends when they grew concerned. He thought about moving on, even calling up an old fling. That didn’t end well, Matthew moaning your name by accident in bed and then she left almost immediately after. He was frustrated with himself for getting this invested, but you were intoxicating. Matthew left the Saddledome after another shit game and drove to your place, with the intent that you were either going to hear him out or he was going to have to cut you out of his life.
“Hi?” You were confused when you saw him on the other side of the door, you leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed. You were already pressed, wondering what Matthew thought he was doing banging on your apartment door. He looked pissed, bags under his eyes like he hasn’t slept in days and you were already rolling your eyes at the tweets about him being a bust.
“I can’t do this shit anymore,” Matthew steps inside, stomping into your space and gritting his words, “You have this hold on me, and I know I told you I could be cool about this but I can’t be. I’m fucking jealous of every other dude you could be with and I think about it all the time-”
“And I’m a heartless bitch,” You hiss, every wall you had just got taller. Your words could cut like a knife, and you were ready to let Matthew have it, “I’ve heard it from everyone, I ruin people Matthew, save me the argument.”
“You’re not going to ruin me, I know you, fuck,” Matthew steps forward, every bit of anger in his body disappearing when he saw the way you lip was starting to quiver. His voice got lower, his thumb running along your jaw, “I know you think you bring out the worst in me, but you bring out my best too.”
“I’m going to hurt you, I always do,” You whisper, averting your eyes down so you didn’t have to look at him.
“Then hurt me later,” Matthew took this as his turn to shrug, try and take a page in your book and be a little nonchalant, “For now, could we just try this out? No games, no one else, just us.”
“This is bad for you Matthew,” You give him one more warning, pulling him closer to you and tugging on the curls at the nape of his neck.
“Be bad for me then,” Matthew groans, grabbing a handful of your ass and pressing a kiss to your lips.
“Matthew!”
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