#and while i can rationalize that shes disabled and struggles with transportation and therefore probably won't go out of her way
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Me, violently shaking with repressed emotions: I Want To Disappear Off The Map And Start A New Life From Scratch.
#irl#not me vague-posting about my mother#(again)#i hate that shes gonna know where i live even if she wont know the unit number#directly because of her stalker behavior when i went no contact before#she called my work trying to figure out my schedule once by bluffing about hours she figured id have#literally like almost an entire year after i cut her off#all while messaging people she knew i used to be friends with trying to get information about me from them#people id barely spoken to in years were sending me screenshots#i didnt even feel safe enough to talk to my siblings or aunt because i was scared she would use them to get info on me#and i want to block her again so bad#just go no contact again#but she'll know where i fucking LIVE#and while i can rationalize that shes disabled and struggles with transportation and therefore probably won't go out of her way#just to show up at my apartment#that doesnt really help much#especially cause shes already talked about having my sister drive to my apartment for things before#so whats to stop her from badgering my sister into driving her there? whats to stop her from walking in?#whats to stop her from asking someone about me using her being my mother as an excuse?#i probably sound so fucking paranoid honestly - i know my therapist thought i did#asdfghjkll
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