#and yes i still thought very much about [redacted]

[todaviia]

.

[cbrownjc]

Thoughts and Speculation after 2x07 (Spoilers):

A lot of people have said that this moment from the Season 2 trailers might actually be caused by a fight between Louis and Armand in the penthouse:

gif credit: @hermit-frog

And I have to say, after watching episode 2x07? I think they might be right.

Because if you know the book, you know that it is at the very end of it, like literally the last few pages, where it's revealed that Louis knew the whole time about Armand's role in what happened to Claudia. And they break up.

And so I think the same thing is coming next week on the show. Only in the show's regard, Louis knew of Armand's role, as we saw here -- but then was made to forget the actual full context of just how involved Armand was.

Because, as I pointed out on Twitter, this image from the trial --

-- is quite something. You have both the writer and director for the Théâtre des Vampires not on stage for this whole thing. Very much underlying the fact that this is a theatrical play that is being put on. As we saw, there was even a real, actual SCRIPT for this whole thing!

Like, how much more could the show have been pointing to what was really going on here? Trust a writing staff of playwrights to be meta about all of this. 🙃

Because the ending of this trial was written and locked in long ago. And who is the one that usually says when a play or film is locked in and finished?

The Director. (And yes I know producers and studios do too, but Armand is very much all of that wrt his role for their little theater as well).

BTW, Santiago and the coven did NOT expect Armand to do that to the audience. Saving Louis was very much off-script. And if Armand really had no power here, the coven could have just taken Louis off stage and killed him another way. The only reason they didn't was because Armand was very much not powerless in all of this.

Like, I love Armand's character, I really do -- now. But that is something that only came about after I read the books from Queen of the Damned forward. For the first two books, I very much did not like him. And, particularly when it comes to the Paris part of this story, that is where we are with his character right now. I know why he's doing what he's doing, I understand it. But I can't defend it.

Louis probably figured things out before San Francisco in 1973. He probably knew Armand's full role in what went down, same as in the book, after it all happened. But it was his suicide attempt that had Armand redact that knowledge from Louis' mind. The clues for that being the case are all there after episode 2x05.

Because, at the end of the day, even knowing Armand's full role in Claudia's death, Louis still mostly blamed himself for it all.

As we see, things are slowly starting to come back to Louis, but he's not fully there yet. And I think this whole memory thing is a more literal interpretation of the veil that descended over Louis' mind after Paris in the books.

A veil that only began to lift once Armand revealed to Louis that Lestat was alive. As we've seen, Louis knew Lestat was alive back in 1973. I'm not sure if he does so now. But maybe this isn't about knowing if Lestat is alive or not. Maybe it's just Louis thinking he needed to be punished because of his own role in failing Claudia -- and staying away from Lestat was part of that self-punishment. Because that view is a feeling I got when watching episode 2x05 and Louis not wanting to speak to Lestat. His refusal to speak wasn't out of anger IMO, but more fear and even sorrow.

The show is very much sticking to the beats of the book with all of this, and not revealing things about what happened that were revealed in later books. So I don't think Louis fully knows what was going on with Lestat during that trial. I wouldn't be surprised if we learn he still doesn't, since he never learned it in the first book.

But as I said here, it was clear as day that Lestat wasn't himself during that trial. Physically and especially mentally. I didn't even guess that the show would be that obvious about it, but they were. All very much hinting about what was really going on with his appearance here.

And Louis himself might, just might figure that out for himself. Especially if Dreamstat might appear to be back in his mind again. Because Dreamstat is very much Louis' subconscious. And I think Louis' subconscious knows something important is missing wrt all of this.

It was nice that, at least in the end, someone chose Claudia. Madeleine could have escaped this but chose to die with Claudia instead when she didn't have to. Her little middle finger to the crowd gave me a smile.

They did not do the full reveal of Claudia's diaries and what was in them on stage, which I seriously thought they would. They gave a hint about it, but more so in episode 2x05 than in here. Which means that, in a later season, we're still looking at that reveal from Merrick happening it seems. But then again . . . there were some things I suspect got left out on purpose because the actual (attempted) murder of Lestat was very much glossed over for us, the audience, during that trial sequence. We are very much set to revisit that whole thing during The Vampire Lestat adaptation in Season 3, of course. But I think even more will be revealed about that there then I originally thought.

And finally, Claudia. They said in the Inside The Episode they wanted her to go out with as much strength and defiance as she could and yeah, she did. But in the end, I still think she was angry, sad, and hurt by it all, which she had every right to be. Because at the end of the day, she never should have been made and was made for all the wrong reasons. But being turned so young made her a fierce and pure vampire though and though because she never had enough time to have lived a human life to have those types of morals and outlooks fully imprinted on her. That was always one of Claudia's core traits wrt her being turned so young, and she still had it here. And yes girl, you will haunt things after this -- particularly your parents.

In fact, it probably very much was your voice Louis heard calling him back in 2x05, wasn't it?

So, for a penultimate episode, this was very, very good. And things are very much going to explode next week. I knew Louis going Carrie/Firestarter on the coven would happen in 2x08. That moment always screamed "season finale" to me. Santiago picking up Claudia's yellow dress is also significant, as I think we'll see Louis' POV of that moment with Lestat about it.

And the break up between Louis and Armand might just be much more violent than it was in the book as well.

[mosaickiwi]

(sorry for any mistakes, English is not my native language) Hello, I hope you are doing well! Can I ask you for a drabble about the wedding day of an emotional MC who burst into tears because she thought that this day would never come and REDACTED, but without the “lavish ceremony” (lots of guests, wedding suits, huge celebration, etc.) (please forgive me, I hope I was able to express myself clearly, thank you very much and have a nice day!) ฅ'ω'ฅ

!!!

By law I must post wedding fic on Valentine's Day!!!

14 Days With You is an 18+ Yandere Visual Novel. MINORS DNI

~Wedding Day~

You nervously toyed with the ring in your palm, heart racing so hard it hurt. It was still difficult to believe what was happening. This was happening.

It was the same golden ring your partner had worn since you first met him. There wasn't a moment you ever saw them without it as he changed from a shy, stuttering mess in a cardigan to the clingy, dark-haired brat of a man you fell in love with more and more each day. Although the amount of rings they wore had grown.

That fateful day on the playground was something you couldn't even remember, and from what your companion told, you didn't want to. The second try was a far better memory for the both of you anyway. You were the one who proposed that time, catching them by complete surprise with the confidence you never usually had to ask anything of him. But you managed to do it.

And now you were the one who would put a ring on their finger.

“We haven't even started the vows,” [REDACTED] quietly said, pulling you from your thoughts. “Y'can’t be cryin’ just yet, Angel.”

“Am I crying?” The words came out hoarse from your already tightening throat. You hadn't realized. Sure enough, hot tears were streaming down your face as he gently wiped at them with his thumb. 

You tried to calm down, gazing up at him to distract yourself. Their voice had the same familiarly teasing tone it always did, but you could tell from the soft quiver to his lower lip that he was holding back his own tears.

“Yeah, it’s—” He let out a sound somewhere between a laugh and a sob, then hurriedly pushed his dark hair out of his reddening eyes. You wanted to tease him back about it, but you knew if you tried to speak again the tears would come flooding even worse. Another few moments passed as you both tried to collect yourselves.

Surprisingly, it took him a little longer. The tears on your cheeks had long fell and dried while he stood in front of you, eyes shrouded behind their bangs.

But after one more unsteady breath, he seemed to find his way again and look at you. “Are you ready?” they asked, a shakiness to their hands as he reached for the dangling chain around your neck—the necklace he’d given to you months ago once he’d found the courage to say yes to your proposal.

With your anxious nod of approval, he continued. Cool fingertips brushed at your collarbone, finding the silver clasp at the back of your neck and releasing it with a faint clicking of metal. The necklace fell loosely in his hands as he pulled it away. The golden ring easily slid from the chain and he rolled it in his fingers for a long moment, staring at it silently.

They were noticeably calmer this time, with a trembling smile that reached their eyes as he took your left hand and repeated himself. 

“Ready?”

[thechekhov]

Hey Chekhov! How do you start converting an AU idea from character sheets and mini comics into a plot outline for a full, continuous comic? Especially if the series you're basing it on isn't complete?

I've been following your white diamond Steven comics for years, and frankly, I love how it builds and continues the scaffolding canon laid to be something that is thematically still the same but also very unique. And I never thought I'll ever say this, but now I'm working on a canon-divergent AU with someone that's I think aiming to do something similar(continue the themes of canon but different). So I'll just like some advice, I suppose!

You might've answered something like this before, honestly, but I tried to dig a little and couldn't really find it.

Thanks, if you do answer this! I just want take the opportunity as well to say also that your comic and blog accompanied me through parts of my late teens, and I'm very grateful for you being a stabilizing influence during that time.

Thank you! I really appreciate you saying that, and I appreciate you respecting me enough to ask for advice.

As for your question...

Well, to be frank, I don't START with character sheets and mini-comics. In fact, for WD!AU, I didn't have any character sheets until I started season 2.

Think of your story as an aquarium. Your characters are fish.

Yes, they're important, but having a whole bunch of fish without any substrate, tanks, feed and WATER..... will not really make for a memorable aquarium experience.

The reality is that all stories should start with an end.

That's my personal approach, anyway.

What I mean is - you need to know the general idea for your story before you begin to write or plan it.

Let's try this:

1.Tell me about your story in THREE sentences!

Just three. Not long ones, just regular ones.

For my AU, @ask-whitepearl-and-steven, it would be:

"A young orphan runs away from home with a mysterious lady who seems more cryptid than human. He realizes that he's not human either - he used to be the ruler of an alien planet! He and the other aliens he meets decide to (REDACTED) (REDACTED) (REDACTED) and he (REDACTED) (REDACTED) (READACTED) (READ ANDCTED) (READ AND FIND OUT)."

YOU should know how YOUR story ends too! Even vaguely.

It helps if you know at what point you plan to lay down the pencil. Because if you DO know, you are always going to know which direction to walk in, even if the end is so far away it's beyond your line of sight.

It's true that when I began WDAU, I didn't have much information about White Diamond and white Pearl, because they had literally ONLY been introduced. I had to guess a lot of the details (like WP being Pink's originally) and what White would be capable of. And thankfully, my original intent for the story's end fit pretty well with what was later revealed!

But don't forget - you could also just fuck around with stuff! It's your story, after all.

And don't forget... to also look back!

2.Tell me WHY the story is happening in the first place.

There's a reason that the beginning of your story happens when it does. If there is no reason to start somewhere, then find a different place to start.

You should be able to tell me "We're picking up the story here because something significant has happened... and that significant thing happened BECAUSE...."

That 'because' is your main background information that should be revealed slowly throughout the story. In WDAU's case, we only have a few pieces of the puzzle. We know Greg's side. He know Earl's side. But there are still little bits and pieces missing! And they're all important for finding out WHY Steven ended up an orphan and WHY he is being followed by White Pearl (Earl) at the very start of the comic!

3.Tell me what the coolest and most interesting things to happen would be....and then write them!

I think this may be something that's rarely said out loud, but I will speak on the behalf of the people...

We should write the scenes we want to read. If you don't want to read the scene you're writing, then DON'T write it!

If you feel like you "have to" do a page and a half of 'lore' because you think it's traditional to have that 'explanation' about the location of your story, or the history of the species or whatever, you're simply wrong. There are other ways to reveal information aside from just forced paragraphs upon paragraphs of information that would make an SAT Reading Section sweat.

Instead, I recommend that you find the most exciting or hilarious way for the characters to discover the most important bits of info. Find a dramatic twist. Shove it into the narrative. Then, figure out what needs to happen to get there.

Ultimately, though, remember this: When you're taking advice from me or from others, don't forget to take advice from yourself, too! It's your story, after all. You know it best, and only YOU can figure out how to get it written.

I hope that helps at least a little bit! Writing it never easy, but it should still be enjoyable!

[serenewrote]

Purely Platonic ~ Harry Collett x poc! non-binary! reader

THIS MANNNNN! If only we were seahorses…

Synopsis: You and Harry are co-stars in an upcoming film called ‘Swords & Spirits’. Due to your close nature, everyone wants to know if there’s romance in the air. (I gave the characters their own names because it would hard for me to keep track otherwise)

Rating: M

Warning(s): swearing, one sexual remark

Y/n L/n and Harry Collett answer the Web’s Most Searched Questions | WIRED

“Hi, I’m Harry Collett.”

“I’m Y/n L/n."

"And this is the WIRED Autocomplete Interview!"

The staff handed Harry a board that was done up to look like google.

"Ok! Here we go. Is Y/n L/n married?"

You giggle at the question, "Damn. I knew that was gonna be a question."

Harry looked at you and then down at the board, confused. "Why is that a question?"

"I'm about to answer that. Ok, I am not married. I just wear a ring on my ring finger because I am very much a rebel. One time during a get together with my family when I was 16, I believe, my aunt had told me to switch my ring onto my middle finger because I wasn't married. I had thought about it a bit after she said that and I realized that I didn't give a fuck about marriage and I still don't. So, that's why people think I'm married and why I wear a ring on my ring finger."

Harry laughs and grabs your hand to show the camera, "It's a beautiful ring."

"Yep. Straight from the Game Of Thrones x Pandora collection, courtesy of this one right here."

You ruffle his hair.

"Next question. Is Y/n L/n in Bridgerton? Ooh, are you?"

"I.... am not. I'm not in Bridgerton, but I am a big fan of the show. Next question, please."

"Is Y/n L/n and Harry Collett in Swords & Spirits?"

"Yes we are. I play Z Andreas."

"And I play Icarus Kennedy."

"Are Y/n L/n and Harry Collett... dating?"

"Dating someone or just dating?"

"Just dating."

"No. We are not dating. Just friends. I don't believe I can go past that with him."

"Someone needs to snatch you up."

"I don't wanna be snatched up. I wanna be d*cked down."

You wink at Harry, and then at the camera.

"When did Y/n L/n start acting?"

"Earlier this year." You start laughing, "Literally just this yearrrr!"

"In what?"

"Doctor Who."

"Oh yeah. I think that's the only reason I watch now."

"Awww, Harry! So sweet. Sweet boy."

"Next question! Who did Y/n L/n play in Doctor Who?"

"I played and still play Jenny Smith aka the Doctor's daughter. Georgia Tennant, I fucking love you. Tell your son to stop calling me during interviews."

You pull your phone out of your pocket to show that Ty was calling you.

"Decline."

"That's all of them. Do I just put it down or...?"

"I've seen these videos. They throw it."

Harry throws the board on the ground.

"Next one please."

The staff hands you the board this time.

"Is Harry Collett. Is Harry Collett... Jacaerys Velaryon?"

"Yes. I play Jacaerys Velaryon in House of the Dragon. Watch it on HBO Max."

"The rightful heir. The future king. Handsome boy."

"Thank you. Thank you for your gracious praise."

"Is Harry Collett. Is Harry Collett... engaged to Y/n L/n? Oh my god!"

"No. Unfortunately, I am not engaged to the amazing Y/n L/n. Although, they are a catch. Why are people searching for this?"

"You know what, I think it's because I visited you a lot during filming. I remember I saw this tweet, I think, on my way to Spain. You were filming for House of the Dragon. I saw it and it said "Harry is such a d-tier fiancé cause Y/n wears their ring all the time in Doctor Who and we never see Harry's ring." I laughed for like 2 minutes straight."

"Yeah, you sent me that. I read the, like, the replies to it and one was like umm, "maybe because they aren't [redacted] married, you delusional [redacted]. Stop, you do this all the [redacted] time." I laughed, admittedly."

"Damnnn."

"Right? Overall, Y/n L/n is an amazing person. They are funny, smart, talented, all of the above but, what we have is purely platonic."

"Yes, purely platonic."

fin.

love this man from ♾️ to ♾️!!!!!

[keiicom]

Yjh things the Webtoon 'forgot' to mention or to point out bc they hate novel yjh

Warning for vague webtoon spoilers ig?? No spoilery names are named and no unreleased scenarios are mentioned/specified btw but I thought I'd add this warning just in case :)

He waited three days on the bridge for kdj to resurface after he dropped him in the Ichytosaurs mouth. Just. Waited there.

He smiles when Kdj tries his food and says it's good (it's more like a tiny smug smile tbh)

He is a WORRIER. Man worries about everything, but sucks at expressing it through actions bc that's when he's most easily misunderstood. It is EXTREMELY easy to misunderstand his actions unless the other characters ask him what he's doing and why [after he explains, he turns out to be actually really thoughtful tbh]

When he tells 41st round shin yoosung to "quit her blabbering"...he wasn't that harsh in the novel. The line was changed (still don't know why) but originally he said something about not having enough time, and wasn't a complete asshole.

Also during that same arc/scene it was revealed that he woke her up because he genuinely didn't think she'd attack him/be mad at him iirc, so it wasn't him being stupid, just somewhat naive

When Iris called KDJ ugly he actually stepped forward and intimidated her by glaring so she'd stop talking :) because he sensed fighting spirit in her and he decided to react lmao

His eyebrow moves similarly to a caterpillar when he's about to make an important decision (note: kdj points this out in the novel because he's always staring at yjh I swear to god there's proof)

Yjh puts on a 'cool' face when he's been caught or called out after trying to be sneaky (he's SO BAD at being sneaky istg I love this man so much)

He sometimes uses his skills for stupid and petty shit *said lovingly with heart eyes*

He's more likely to give someone/an NPC a quick death than to make them suffer until they die

He always goes along with KDJ's plans, even though Kdj barely tells him ANYTHING about them ever 😭 He glares but still goes along with them I NEED Y'ALL TO UNDERSTAND HOW IMPORTANT THIS IS- /lh

He drags his sword on the ground when he's happy/satisfied with something, or generally in a good mood. Also Loves to clean his sword (I think the webtoon added a scene of him cleaning the sword like. once)

He loves his sister more than anything (we haven't seen a lot of scenes with yoo mia AND yjh in the webtoon yet but I have high expectations for those knowing how much he adores her in the novel)

Mans RUNS to help every time kdj is in danger, unless he genuinely thinks kdj 1) can handle the situation himself or 2) deserves the punishment

He has MONOLOGUES in his head even though he only ever says like two sentences thakrhsjfjb, and is very eloquent when given the chance to explain his thought process/reasoning

[which kdj rarely lets him do. bc he's hellbent on doing the talking and most other characters don't expect yjh to talk anyway]

The hand holding scene that was turned into a weird wrist holding scene? Yes originally they held hands (he wasn't as angry then either)

He's a serial texter and will spam message people

He loves dumplings

He gets jealous when other people monopolize Dokja's attention for too long (also canon, ex: Sangah, [redacted 1], sometimes han sooyoung, [redacted 2], [redacted 3] 💀 and WILL glare at Kdj or demand answers depending on how severe the transgression is)

He's tired. So, so tired.

HE CAN LAUGH

he doesn't let Han Sooyoung live out of pride/not wanting to lose to kdj (???? what even was that). he lets her live because he doesn't want kdj to think poorly of him / alternatively he doesn't want to lose him as an ally. Not everything is about pride with him 🫠

he looks embarrassed after hearing yoo mia tell him he looks "happy when you talk about [kdj]". the narration also gives her statement some credibility, because "she knows him well since she's his sister". but of course they made him look angry instead of embarrassed 🙄 bc god forbid he shows any other facial expression ever

He's nosy (again: said lovingly with heart eyes). You'll notice how even when he pretends not to care, he'll still stick around to see how things develop/gather info on 'important' stuff. If he's not interested, he'll just leave, bc he's the kind of guy to just do that. So if he doesn't leave, even if he's pretending not to care... you see where I'm going with this

He has a sense of humor, believe it or not (though most of the time he's hilarious without meaning to)

When [redacted] asked yoo joonghyuk what his deal was with kdj and why he wanted him in his group he said "kdj is necessary for this world. I need him." but webtoon decided to skip that line 🫠

I'd add more but the rest is spoilers fhajhrjeka so yeah I'll just wait to see what webtoon does first and I'll update this as they go

Yjh says "I guess your mother doesn't like me" instead of this "like mother like son" bullshit, because the second one implies dokja doesn't like him. which couldn't be farther from the truth

Yoo Joonghyuk actually looks distraught when he realizes he's the one that has to kill [REDACTED]. To the point [REDACTED] has to tell him to not make that face.

He holds him tenderly as [REDACTED] falls, and tries to hang onto him as he's dragged away.

[cinnamon-girl-writes]

higuruma marriage headcanons ! . . .

by @cinnamon-girl-writes

higuruma x reader, fluff, nsfw under cut

first of all i looooovvveeee higuruma so much so i'm glad other people do and i'm not alone :')

i'm not gonna say much about dating pre-marriage

he definetly dates with the intent to get married. i can't see him as a player or someone who dates around just for fun

he'd take you on lots of dates; several a week

most of them are more modest locations like a coffee shop or the local markets, but on special occasions (birthdays, anniversaries) he books a reservation at a fancy restaurant

in a relationship and in his life i think he's very smart with money

he proposed at the spot where you met; a beautiful park in the city which was especially green this time of year

he definetly took you to get your nails done a few days beforehand and paid in full

he decided to splurge and get you a gorgeous wedding ring with a huge diamond

obviously this was well thought out and planned, and he decided that you're worth it and logically, you're going to be wearing this for the rest of your life so he wanted it to be high quality and something that you'd like

he'd definetly take into consideration whether you prefer gold or silver jewelry choose get a ring accordingly

he really just wants to have a simple wedding

mostly because he's not one for huge public displays of affection but also, going back to him being smart with money, he wants to save up for a honeymoon trip and investments like a house, furnishings, etc.

basically, he's a very logical person and doesn't see a lot of value in putting so much money into one day

that being said, he'd still make it as special and intimate for the two of you as possible with special gestures and a traditional ceremony

i can see the wedding happening in a church most likely

anyways, the honeymoon would be somewhere you've never traveled to so the two of you could experience a new place, like malaysia (iykyk), france, italy, greece, especially somewhere romantic

once y'all move in together, he'd be very adamant about holding up his end of the cleaning, cooking, maintenace, etc. even though he works a full time job. to him it's the only option; you both live there so you both do equal work to take care of the home

i see him as being a very clean and routinely person

he likes to have his morning routine before he goes to work every day: wake up next to the love of his life, sleep in for as many minutes as possible, then get up and shower, get dressed, have coffee and breakfast, and read the paper before he's on his way to work

speaking of breakfast, this man can cook. one of his favorite hobbies is cooking for you and having you be his personal taste tester

he likes to experiment with food from different cultures and other countries

sometimes date nighy with him is just him cooking a nice meal for the two of you and watching y'all's favorite movies

he loves true crime btw

also in his house this man has a huge library. like he has an office but he also has a room just dedicated to books

yea there's some law books but it's mostly miscellaneous things he found interesting: cooking books, fantasy novels, travel guides, etc.

what can i say, he'd be a perfect partner~

NSFW 🪐

higuruma is a  g o d  at eating pussy, i don't make the rules

that tongue can recite the law AND [redacted]

he also doesn't have a huge dick (y'all let's be realistic. why would you want that anyways) but this man knows how to use it

i'm thinking like 5 inches, above average girth and neatly trimmed hair but not completely gone. slight curve the the left

his favorite position is missionary 100%. this just makes so much sense to me

i know y'all are gonna say 'ass or tits' so i'll just go ahead and establish he's a tits man. yes this is the law

he has a praise kink. oh he's unfulfilled in his life and hates his job?? yea fs.

i know i said tits but this man also loves thighs. he wants to be suffocated between them

honestly 10/10 he's perfect

[moonchild-in-blue]

Vessel and the New Lore

So the new messages got me thinking and connecting dots. I don't know coherent this will sound, but I think there's something here? Anyways. Something about the relationship Vessel has with himself vs. The Mask.

I thought it'd be interesting to link the parallels between the Room Bellow show and the Fall For Me video messages, with the new ones and the album. Long post ahead so I'll put a cut somewhere.

(This is the second time I'll be writing this cus tumblr decided to be a hoe and deleted my entire draft so if it seems weird, you know. Pro tip: never use the app for long posts.)

Disclaimer: I'm in no way endorsing or encouraging any type of discourse about Vessel's irl identity and/or other [Redacted] and such. Unfortunately I do know things, but not everyone does. Respect the band; don't spoil it for others. If you know, keep it to yourself.

So, starting with the first message:

Mask: Why am I here? What is my purpose in all of this? Vessel: Your purpose is twofold. You protect me, from them, and you also protect them from me. Mask: How is it that I serve to protect anyone from anything, that makes no sense. Vessel: In order for all of this to work there has to be a certain boundary in place. They need to be able to project themselves onto this, without anyone else's identity getting in the way. In turn, I need to be able to show my true self to them in a way that does not compromise their ability to connect. Mask: So that's what I am? A boundary? Vessel: Yes.

We have here a confirmation of what he has told us many times before, either indirectly or not. The Mask/the Vessel persona serves as a way for him to connect and engage with us, while keeping both parties safe. We get to project onto and take from him some sort of comfort and catharsis, without any external factors to influence and skew the way we interpret his music, and He gets to expose and deal with his pain and negative thoughts in a protected environment. Who he is is irrelevant, we're merely here to share and understand each other.

Through the anonymity the mask offers, he is free to be as vulnerable and open with us as he wants, while keeping his identity safely stored away. The Mask serves as the physical reminder of how much we are allowed to know about him, and in return, how far he can (or should) expose himself without compromising his true identity. By living as Vessel and forgetting himself, he is ironically free to bare his most fragile and imperfect parts of himself on display (much like how we're all infinitely more honest about our struggles behind a fake online name than in irl.)

(curiously, this seems to be a contradiction to Higher's second verse, which feeds into the idea that Sleep is not the protector Vessel sometimes claims Them to be - "With all that you believe / You still refuse to shelter me")

From the Room Bellow:

"I experienced a great deal of pain in my life, however I do not believe I have suffered as you have suffered. Perhaps that Is another reason why we are here. At the very least, we have all suffered."

Lore wise, we are told time and time again that Vessel is a "sacred guardian", a messenger, a weapon, a tool - a physical vessel - for Sleep and Their message. He is the answer to Sleep's necessity for connection with us. And for that to work, he willingly gives up his identity for Sleep. For us.

Mask: I don't believe you. I believe there is more to it than that. I believe you are afraid of something. Vessel: We are all afraid of something, are we not? Mask: What is it you are so afraid they will see? Vessel: That I am exactly like everyone else. ... Vessel: I think I am afraid of becoming you. Mask: What does that even mean? Vessel: My life is becoming gradually consumed by you. Before long, all that I am will be contained within you. Then, one day, when I no longer wish to wear you, there will be nothing else left.

"I am afraid, are you afraid? I want to understand what it is to let go." (Fall For Me)

At the end of the day, Vessel is just some guy - he fears, and aches, and bleeds the same as us. We're equals. But as Vessel, he can't allow himself to crack, to break the illusion. As Vessel (and to connect to the lore, as the vessel of a god), he poses as someone we can look up to, someone who's there to carry our pain for us, almost like a symbiotic relationship of sorts - we feed on each other's emotions and energies.

From the Room Bellow:

"To love oneself is not the easy task we are sometimes told it is. (...) My own path towards greater self acceptance is paved with the art that I create. It is a path I continue to stumble down at the expense of everything else."

Without getting too much into it, it seems Vessel/Sleep Token were created as a sort of coping mechanism to deal with whatever it is that He went through. And he seems to have achieved that - he escaped his former self and became "Vessel", someone who's allowed to cry and rage and let his feeling loose. Someone who receives praise and comfort for it, someone who is finally understood.

Except that somehow, that same safety the Mask offered him backfired. Because how can you tell what's you and what's not? It appears that the lines between Vessel vs. Him have blurred beyond recognition. Because "Nothing lasts forever", so once ST ends, and Vessel is no longer a necessity, who does he become? Can he go back to his old self? Is there even a self to go back to?

Do you ever believe that we can turn into different people? It's getting harder to be myself. Do you wish that you loved me? Could we ever release? Is it better to just not feel?

I think it's worth mentioning DYWTYLM. Usually when I listen to it, I just interpret as being about self-love/esteem, suicidal thoughts, insecurities, yada yada yada, BUT! I think it kinda fits this right?? Like a conversation between Vessel and Him, the guy behind the mask.

And really, if you think about it, I think this dialogue is the basis of what TMBTE is. It's Vessel facing all these different facets of himself, the past versions, the ugly sides, coming to terms with them and learning to move on. And in the end, we see he finally does realize, albeit somewhat reluctantly, that there is more to it, than he can "be someone new", even if it means he needs to shed and let go of past versions of himself.

(of course, this is putting aside the whole trilogy and the story we've been told about Sleep/Vessel/Whatever romantic entanglement he was involved in. i'm merely giving this some other meaning and choosing to look through a very specific lens. call it a parallel universe if you want)

It's him accepting that although there may not be a version of himself to come back to, his Eden so to speak, there is finally something more waiting for him. But I'll get more into it later.

Also worth mentioning, this part of conversation-

Mask : Do you think they want you to cry? Do you think they like it? Vessel : Not as such, I think they just want to know that I am feeling something, feeling what they are feeling, perhaps. Mask : Do you think that this amount of crying is healthy for you? Vessel: I don't know. But at least I feel something, if I don't feel anything than why would I even do this?

-seems to be directly co-related to those lines on DYWTYLM. He wonders if maybe would be better not to feel at all, as if really asking himself, "should I continue to live as Vessel?", because that is his/The Mask's function.

(I almost forgot to mention the "Smile back at me" / "I can only ever see them smiling. That's good, I want them to smile." co-relations, but you see where I'm going right?")

Mask: It seems you have forgotten who you are. Before you had me you were nothing. All of this artifice, all this pathetic conjecture about your identity, it is nothing but a manifestation of how short-sighted and solipsistic you have become. I lifted you from misery and obscurity. You would be better to become me. You are nothing without me. You always were nothing without me.

"I am nothing without this music. I am nothing without this mask." (Room Bellow)

Sleep is a dickhead. And there it is - another confirmation of what we all assumed, of what he has also told us many times before in different words. Vessel, or better yet, Him, struggles with imposter syndrome, and a part of him seems to believe his worth is exclusively tied to his ability to create music and perform. Because who matters is Vessel, not Him. The praise and adoration, the glory, belongs to solely Vessel (in-lore, to Sleep).

He does not matter. He is insignificant. He is nothing.

So it makes sense to see how much he wishes to be someone else. How dependent he on his Mask (on Sleep). He can't shed that new identity away, because somehow, it became is ONLY identity. And yet, he knows that one day that must happen. And from a creative/artist standpoint, when you expose yourself the way he does into your art, almost bleeding into it, if that outlet is taken away, you really are left with nothing.

(yall, read the poem "about the PEN conference" by Bukowski).

"The truth is, I am ugly, I am inadequate, I am lost. I am no God." (Fall For Me)

And can I just say, how incredibly heartbreaking it is to hear him talk about himself like that? I have so, so much love and respect for Ves, it's almost ridiculous to think he is only worth the weight of his mask. I would give him a million hugs if I could. Whether or not he still believes that, I hope he one day can look at himself the way we do, and be proud and happy of the amazing human that he is.

I also think that, and this is just me rambling, their sudden explosion to fame must've taken some sort of toll of sorts. It must be SUCH an amazing feeling to see this many people connect and dedicate themselves to something you created, to be able to read between the lines of you thoughts, but it must just equally as scary. Suddenly there's SO many eyes on you, demanding and picking apart every gesture. Viciously clawing at the mask for a glimpse of the fragile soul within. It must not be easy to cope - and this goes to everyone in Sleep Token. They have to deal with so much unfairness, it's disgusting.

Vessel: You. Are. Wrong. In the end, my fractured sense of self was only another piece of fuel for the fire that burns in the eyes of these people before us. They too are pained. They too not know who they truly are. They are each stood alone on a stage of their own. And yet, they are here. United by that sense of never truly belonging. They see something beyond their own bleak horizons. And they reach for it. Together. So let us join now. To reflect their joy and to serve as a conduit for their anguish. To swallow their fear. To Worship.

"So for now let me serve as a living drama of your pain. If we are to be submerged then let us be submerged together." (Fall For Me)

And this is the part that really breaks me. He knows how much we need this, how much we rely on his music, on his words. He fights against his own claims that he has no value - he serves a purpose and that purpose is to serve the audience. Us. To take our struggles, our desires, and make it his own. To basically serve as a sacrifice for our well-being. To suffer, to feel together. To serve as a living drama of OUR pain.

"I will smile through the agony for you".

Because in the end, we're all equally broken. Because that's what the Mask is for, the anonymity, the mystery, the band - for us to "project ourselves" onto him, onto them. They are vessels, servants, worshippers of a god who shelters them; much like how we interact with their music, much like how Vessel thinks his purpose is for.

(and I could expand on this weird worshipper vs worshipee cycle, but i'm tired and i can't ramble on for too long. someone more clever than me feel free to expand)

(a post edit: peep that "fire that burns in the eyes of these people before us" vs "those eyes like fire, I'm a winged insect, you're a funeral pyre" parallel. Vessel sacrificing himself to us, for us. Performing and being Vessel as something he cannot but feel compelled to do.)

From the Room Bellow:

"We are here to silently collect. To project ourselves onto one-another. We are here to remember. We are here to forget."

WHICH BRINGS US TO EUCLID.

No, by now The night belongs to you This bough has broken through I must be someone new

If we are to take the messages as a complement to the album, then this definitely marks the "shift" in Vessel's perspective. He CAN be more, and he NEEDS to be more. To be new.

The night does not belong to god - it belongs to US. To Him. Not just Vessel, but Him. Obviously this is all speculation, but it really feels like he's ready to let go of so many things, and move on. To renew himself, to stand up and fight. To finally "bite back". He doesn't seem to be completely changed, as there are things he still seems to hold on to (just listen to Euclid). But it´s different now. The "vicious cycle is over."

"They see something beyond their own bleak horizons. And they reach for it. Together. So let us join now."

Vessel seems to emphasize the "collectiveness" of what Sleep Token is and represents quite often. So in a way, it´s him saying "We´ve all suffered together, we've all experienced so many things together, so let us reach for something better as one. Let us all become new. You are not alone in this, and neither am I, so hold on to us and be happy."

WHICH IS!!!!! JUST!!!!!

I think this shift represents something important. My guess, like many others have said, is that Something Big is going to happen in/after Wembley. I don't know what, I don't know if it's truly the end of the road for ST, as many speculate, but something is definitely going to happen. Whatever it is, I hope this is a positive change for them, and specially Vessel, and I am just so so grateful to be part of this amazing community of ours.

(if you read the whole thing, I love you and thank you and I'm sorry. My brain was itching real bad and this had to be let out. Don't take this a proper analysis or whatever, this is me squeezing excess water off the old rag that is my mind)

[hammerhead-jpg]

Okay okay okay imma talk about something

Redacted ramble number 45 go!!!!!

The potential argument as to why shipping Asher and David is bad could be "yes, Asher and David have shown to be very close in a way regular friendships aren't, literally being "more than a promise " and "two sides of the same coin" and all the other other stuff we've been told, but why can't that be platonic? Why can't we assume that even in a world where they don't already have their own mates that kinda thing couldn't possibly be platonic ? As a society we always assume that if two people that aren't related become closer than your average friendship it automatically means that it has to be romantic, that they then have to start dating, move in together, get married and have children. But Asher and David very well could have all that closeness and still be just best friends."

And to that I would usually say that well, shipping is done for fun. There doesn't have to be rhyme or reason to it. Most people who ship them (at least I think) are able to comprehend the idea that Asher and David could be that close and still consider themselves best friends and not lovers because that is the reality of the series.

But then I thought no- I - uh -NO!!

Because hhejjsjesjsuj EVERY single interaction that implies closeness IS FUCKIN FULL of sextual tension like no joke with the scene in the wedding where David fixes Asher's tie I was actually wondering if they were gonna start making out or somth

I can't fuckin say that their relationship is inherently romantic cuz that would be a lie but LIKE hdkdndmdhjfjj their relationship is so much closer to romance than your average very VERY close friendship

To paint you a picture Milo is also a person that is very very close to David and Asher

Sure, maybe not as much to them as they are to each other, Milo met them later in life, he was never their roommate or David's main support while he was grieving his father's death but they're still very close

Yesterday I read a fic about all three of them as a polycule and it's just felt...wrong

I guess if there are any wolf boys polycule lovers rn I'm sorry but having Milo in there felt wrong in a way I cannot describe

And the imperium AU.....the IMPERIUM AU

The existence of the imperium au inherently implies that if Asher and David didn't meet their mates they would be together romantically. THERE IS A NON CANON YET OFFICIAL AU WHERE THEY WERE LOVERS FOR LIFE SO CLOSE THAT WHEN DAVID DIED NOT ONLY DID IT PERMANENTLY CHANGE ASHER BUT LITERALLY A PART OF HIS MAGIC DIED WITH DAVID.

There is nothing in the story that really needed Asher and David to be mates, so much so that in the original Imperium AU episode Erik had no plans for them to have been lovers until he made the cataclysm sequel it's literally just because Erik wanted to

SO IF the implication is that if they didn't meet their mates they would've have been lovers then you CANNOT judge people for imagining that scenario where it's not in an imperialistic world where one of them ends up dying

Also I can't even say that it's because they didn't meet their mates because although David obviously didn't meet Angel because they were engaged(?) to the king imperial Asher I'm pretty sure meets Baabe around the same time that he meets them in the prime universe so like?????

In conclusion If Erik ships them then you cannot blame me for doing the same thing!!

[oogaboogaspookyman]

Buzi fic let's muthafuckin gooooooooooo

B belongs to @ilovejoll !

[REDACTED] belongs to me!

[GOOD TEAM]

Back to that fuckin' camp... Great.

It's dark, it's rank, it's got a rancid, sinister and genuinely discomforting and dark aura, it's the place where one of her traumatic moments have transpired.

Uzi killed and ate her classmates here.

All this for a sighting...

And yet the four walked, around and about, searching like born hunters...

...

That's funny.

Uzi, N, V, and B (don't say anything about the names), they all walked and searched every nook and cranny, whatever cabin they found it's searched, because of this one Solver drone a group encountered that was, and Uzi quotes during the walk to the camp, "abnormally friggin' tall and chuckled a lot"

One guy even reportedly went missing after this encounter.

This new threat must be destroyed, there shall not be a season 2 of this bullshit.

Thud.

"I don't think it's here, weirdo" B spoke. Weirdo. Fuck's sake.

"It's Uzi, strawberry, and i'm sure if we look harder we'll find it, we already got traces of the guy so they must be here!" Uzi was confident after said traces were found... And N didn't seem to know when to quit being optimistic and supportive of Uzi, seriously the moment they got together it's like the entire planet was doomed to deal with these two dorks!

One of those dorks is your brother. You care about him. Do it for him. B sighed at the thought.

"We'll go a little further, and if we find it we kill it and we all go home, but if we don't..." B sounded threatening there, especially getting closer and whispering the next words in her sound receptor.

"You're dead to me. Having wasted our time."

Hot. That's not me saying it, i only say her thoughts out loud

"We'll find the weird analog horror freak, babe! I hate it when she's right, believe me, but we did find traces of this weirdo being around and we still find more!" V popped up from outta nowhere the interrupt the moment of intimacy intense mutual hatred, and showed off a piece of paper in her hand "Like this note i caught in a cabin!"

V flipped the note around, showing off... Something???

Uzi and N felt shivers run down their spine as V showed off the note.

"Haha! That's not ominous at all nope!" N and Uzi said in unison, perfectly. They took note of this.

"Jinx!"

V gagged at the sight of the Nuzi duo chuckling and giggling like little kids. B just glared at Uzi like she was a bad influence...

If it's of any consolation, they bother me too

"You don't get to talk, little shit" V growled at Uzi's tail.

Suddenly they stumble upon a strange... Cave??? In the camp?? At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the planet, localized entirely within this camp??

I had some fun while i could, it seems. Smiley face

"Shut" Uzi then squinted, as if it's going to make comprehending easier, and...

[PROCESSING WUTEVR THIS IS]

[◻️◻️◻️◻️◻️_______]

Yes it's a cave! A very ominous, red, fleshy cave that destroyed an entire cabin, turning it into a gruesome wooden outer layer for itself and thus taking it's place!

"aaAAHAHAHAa OKAY UZI UHHH... DO WE ENTER OR DO WE BURN IT ALL DOWN" N chuckled with lots of fear in his voice.

"If we burn the cave it's going to burn the entire forest too, and as much as i'd love that it's very important and i know there's others who love this forest as much as i hate it" Uzi sounds so smart when she explains things, it made N's core flutter... Aside from beating a little too fast at the sight of the cave and the general aura of the camp.

FIND ME

FIGHT ME

HOW WELL DO YOU FARE

Uzi turned around fast.

Oh i know this one!

She grimaced at this, hearing a robotic male voice coming from... Pretty much nowhere and at the same time as if it's behind her, and looked at everyone else to verify that she's not crazy.

N, V, and B all look just as unsettled. She's not crazy then.

"We're going home, gang, fuck this and fuck everyone" B began walking away while holding up two middle fingers.

Something was wrapped around their leg.

Catch

It's Uzi's fucking tail.

"We don't know what this is, it could be something worse than... It, and if that's the case, then we have to put a stop to it... As much as i hate this, it has to be done"

B hates when Uzi is right... They groaned "FINE let's get this over with" as they walked back to the area and swapped their hands with claws...

Let's go down in the belly of the beast...

Haha, Uzi scolded you

"She didn't scold me, freak" B growled at Uzi's tail. Y'know- the moment this thing began to speak, they knew it meant something terrible was coming. (Whether i mean they as in the group or B alone is up to you lmao)

Gross.

It's all wet, squishy, bloody flesh from top to bottom.

Massive, disgusting, grotesque.

This cave is nothing but blood and gore.

As the group walked, something began to pulsate from the ground Uzi walked on...

"GAH ROBO CHRIST!!" It blew up and blood landed on her face and clothes.

V could only giggle. Of course she'd giggle.

"Bite me, what if this happened to you!"

"I'd lick it off, period. Likely tastier than you~"

Uzi just. Glared and made a face that spelled out Why Are You Like This™

Gross, gross, gross, fucking gross.

Giggle

"Quiet you!" Uzi hissed at her own tail. You look crazy rn lol

Gurgling from further away..?

Uh oh spaghetti-os

"What the..??" B knew it meant something was wrong but they couldn't quite put a finger on it...

Until a spot in the ground began to pulsate, as if something was trying to get out and make itself known.

"Holy- V WATCH OUT!" B yelled as she tackled V out of the radius.

A tendril bursts from the ground, the spot that was pulsating before, and attempts to grab whatever was unfortunate enough to end up in it's clutches.

That being B.

"N GET OUTTA THERE!!" And Uzi, as she tackled the frozen in fear N out of it's reach.

B and Uzi are grabbed by tendrils, and right after dragged into the depths of the flesh cave, screaming.

"UZI!!!" N screams, fear in his voice and his heart beating at it's fastest, meanwhile V is quiet, in shock from what she just witnessed...

They've both lost people they care about...

"Ow... Robo god my head..." Uzi said under her breath, slowly getting up from a rough fall...

"Uzi..? Are you okay..?" She heard a familiar voice speak to her, a worried tone in their voice... B???

"No way you're telling me that, strawberry... Yeah i'm fine, i've been through much worse..." Uzi got up and dusted herself off.

B sighed "Let's get this over with before any of us die here, no bonding things, capiche?"

"Alright alright, no need to get pissy over caring about me~" she said smugly before–

"I care because N cares, if he didn't you'd be dead meat the moment we met. He's my brother and a fucking ray of sunshine, so you better behave."

Woah

"..." Uzi didn't know what to feel or think of this... It hit way too hard to really know what to feel... Maybe something like sadness? Something similar...

But she's not a feelings person, she's an edgy tough fighter that became GOD some time ago! She's not gonna let that persona fall apart now!

"Gee alright..." was all she could muster, seeing no other choice of words to respond... Whatever that was.

B swapped their left hand with a flashlight, looking for some sort of exit or way forward...

And a way forward there is. In the shape of a drone.

A freakishly tall drone with a blank, empty visor, also a tattered, dark blue robe and grey spiky hair. It's him.

A song began, somewhere. A very corrupted, broken song, making the sight of him standing all the more sinister.

Excited. Here we go~. Smiley face

You found me!

I'm so glad!

And now

He crouched, going from standing tall to crawling on all fours.

We get to play!

Yay!

Every spoken word, he moved like his body was made of a rubber hose, at times even twitching and shaking.

My name is Pen, and you are Serial Designation B and Uzi Doorman

How does he know all that?!

"Wha- wha- wh- what are you?!" Uzi stammered from the sheer terror, whipping out her railgun as B showed off their right hand, the huge steel claws, and the red nanite acid tail, preparing themself to strike the moment Pen made any move... And subconciously using the other hand to put it in front of Uzi, protecting her.

What am i? Ahhh... Good question there, miss Doorman!

I'm a host of the Absolute Solver, it seems...

His head twitched and shook for a short moment...

And i sense quite a lot of it, too, coming from

He crawled closer, his body clicking like clockwork, somehow not getting sliced and diced by B... Turns out, they're frozen in fear too, shaking.

You

Miss Doorman

His blank, empty, dark visor stared into Uzi's core...

But enough chit chat!

He quickly shifted and thrashed about back away from the two.

Let's get started with the games!

Let's have some fun!

Let's play together!

Just us three!

It's going to be so much fun!

As Pen lifted a hand...

"NO!"

SLASH...

Ah

My hand

B cut it off

Turns out, B did indeed swing forward and cut off one of Pen's hands.

That's something!

Why the fuck does he act like it's nothing

B lunged forward, and got smacked away by the remaining hand of Pen, and said hand is blasted into oblivion by Uzi's railgun. Well. More like whole arm.

"Shit i missed!" She hissed, as she did indeed miss! You missed! How could you miss, he was three feet in front of you!

Rude

Uzi is grabbed by the previously chopped off hand and thrown away from himself like a kid's toy, sending her railgun away from it's owner.

Where did that hand come from?? Can he regenerate?!

No matter, it's a fight he's looking for then it's a fight he'll get...

B and Uzi stand back up to have a go again and let out a war cry as they run straight towards Pen.

LET'S PLAY, FREAK

It's a battle against just another liar.

When Pen is engaged in combat, all he does is scramble, thrash about, climb and crawl around like a spider and lunge forward when they're both lined up, causing both B and Uzi to get tackled and taken down.

When he is down, suddenly the room goes dark and both B and Uzi are grabbed and thrown away like plushies. And yet they keep getting back up to try again.

He likes to fuck with his prey, it seems...

At least it means Pen can be defeated.

Uzi, having landed conviniently perfectly from a throw, aimed her railgun at Pen once more, this time for the core. Which was hard to do, as his entire body moved like he was one rubber hose, thrashing about wildly and bending and shifting and whipping.

"Fuck!" Uzi shouted, which caused Pen to hear her cuss and grab her from afar as he threw B away.

Language, miss Doorman

I don't appreciate that kind of tone

I think i should punish you for that

And i know just what to do

Uh oh spaghetti-os.

"DO NOT TOUCH HER!"

SLASH...

B flew into the scene and chopped off the arm Uzi was trapped in, and suddenly it felt like time slowed down.

Oh holy shit.

The sight of B, in the air having chopped off one of Pen's arms, the one that held Uzi in his grasp, their hair flying in the wind of the momentum. That long, silver, fluffy, absolutely gorgeous hair.

...

B looked at her, apparently taking advantage of time having slowed down, and smiled so sincerely..? Why???

"[I gotcha]" their screen displayed.

She nodded and smiled back, as she fell and landed on her feet, and raised her railgun once more.

"B! Restrain him for me!"

"Copy that." Woah they love dropping that deep voice card don't they.

B, SOME-FUCKING-HOW, swapped their right hand for the laser and cut Pen's limbs off with it in the air in a half-moon swipe, and soon after they manage to pin him to the wall with their tail to his head.

Oh

Well

We had a good run

Well played, duo

See you another day

Bt Ofm kpplfc pm bs sgf kjsskf ovqokf hjqk, bjnjmh gfq spz bs gjt dpqf, gf efks, epq pmdf jm gjt kjef, xgpkf.

Boom

"Thanks for saving my ass back there..."

"It's nothing... Really, it's nothing, it means nothing-"

"Oh my robo GOD B COULD YOU STOP WITH THE TSUNDERE SHIT" B got startled at the sudden yelling from Uzi. They feel scolded now.

"You saved me and i saved you, we saved each other, because we both care about N and apparently each other too- if it's of any consolation i didn't want this either but does it look like i have control over my feelings?! No! No i don't!"

B looked on as Uzi went on her crazy tangent about feelings and reppression and so on so forth, essentially scolding them, and at some point...

"Okay i get it, now quiet! Christ you can be so annoying sometimes..."

...

...

...

Sigh

"Thanks, i guess... We made a good team..."

...

Uzi could only smile at that. They're right, they do make a good team...

"Yeah..."

"UZI!!!!!!"

Here comes big brother

UH OH SPAGHETTI-OS.

One mighty tackle hug full of love from a worried and happy N took her down once and for all! The evil is defeated! (No it's not, i'm being goofy here lol)

And now it's B's turn in getting taken down, from the small yet strong and feisty V, running full speed at B to give a tackle hug too, causing them both to fall down. V then proceeded to kiss the everloving fUCK out of B because god damn she missed them.

"Woag............" Is all B could muster.

"Are you okay Zi?! Are you hurt?! Traumatized?! Did someone try to do bonding things with you that wasn't B?!"

"I'm okay N i'm fine, heheh-" Uzi chuckled and then fell into a giggle fit when N began nuzzling into her neck.

...

Uzi looked at B, who was smiling at her once more. Surprised, then another sincere smile too.

[You did great]

[So did u]

[Thanks]

[Same]

[atopvisenyashill]

seeing how some greens act like rhaenyra being groomed by her uncle, and subsequently being unable to let go of him, is HER personal failure turned me into a rhaenyra extremist when i simply enjoyed her character beforehand.

im really glad you're speaking about it because even though it's fiction, it still perpetuates a very dangerous rhetoric

wait this gives me an excuse to ramble, pls excuse me if i phrase things maybe a little crassly here, it’s a delicate topic i’m speaking indelicately about but also, i think i should be allowed bc [redacted] BUT-

obviously i don’t like, love, some of the changes to the show but i think the first half does a great job of setting it up to where you can see both alicent and rhaenyra are surrounded exclusively by much older men who want to fuck them, and have just no way of knowing who is being genuine with them. because no one is really! so you have episode 4, where alicent is sleeping in a room with pornographic art on the wall and being called to her husband’s bed and she can’t say no, and he’s not going to do anything to make the whole thing even marginally easier for her. and then you have rhaenyra, pulled from her bed by her uncle to a brothel, and she’s completely exposed, and she’s experiencing new things, and he’s purposefully trying to make this feel good but also overwhelming for her, then abandons her drunk & confused & half naked. this is The Same Thing - they’re both being used and manipulated by a much older man, but because that manipulation looks different, they react different. but it’s still manipulation.

yes, the type of abuse is different when it’s like, your ugly ancient grandpa grooming you vs a handsome 30 year old stranger you met online that you tell all your high school friends is your boyfriend, but ultimately, both the grandpa and the 30 year old boyfriend are abusers but more importantly, the granddaughter and the high schooler are both victims!!! i think a lot of people when analyzing this whole thing, will pin daemon as a groomer but then completely forget that this also makes rhaenyra a victim. some people will even hee hee haw haw over it because “oh your feminist icon would rather marry her groomer uncle than her gay cousin in the book” DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF. could it possibly be that rhaenyra prefers daemon to laenor because daemon has manipulated her into thinking she is only free with him? she is only safe with him?? could it possibly be that he has been giving her gifts and taking physical liberties with her for her whole life, and being the Good Cop, Sweet Confidant to her parents Bad Cop her whole life, that she feels taken in by him because he is all she knows???? in the same vein that alicent just swallows all the poison and bullshit from otto because that’s her father, and his protection is all she knows????

honestly part of like ~the discourse~ that’s most frustrating is that most greens just refuse to see rhaenyra’s pov or see that she’s also a grooming victim grasping for power to protect her own children, again just like alicent, but on the flip side, most of the analysis from the blacks side is like “if you think nyra is a victim of grooming you are just as bad as the people calling her a whore for having children out of wedlock” and like, how do you even engage with that. with either of those opinions. you can’t wksjd so if youre, ya know, like a normal fucking person who can see how both girls are being manipulated, but you have like a fondness for nyra specifically, it’s just constant bad takes. there’s nowhere to go to escape the bad takes.

i thought we had already hashed out this idea that being aware or unaware of your victimhood doesn’t suddenly mean you’re not being oppressed during the main show with arya and sansa but no, we’ve actually just taken this exact same annoying fandom discourse about which teenage girl is dealing with being abused in the most acceptable way and made it a thousand times worse.

[kcscribbler]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers! Spread the self-love 💞

Aw, thank you so much @justabigoldnerd! I feel weird about self-reccing, but I don't think I've ever actually thought much about my favorites, so. This should be fun.

In no particular order, and taken only from stories currently posted to AO3:

Loki Series

Ready or Not

Summary: In which the waiting is over, and the war begins.

Oddly enough, the last two chapters of this arc are my favorite of all the 150K+ words in the Storyteller series. It was difficult to say goodbye to this series, because I poured a lot of love into it, but I told the story I wanted to tell, and I love where it ended. (Chaptered)

Star Trek: Alternate Original Series

2. What's in a Name, Chapter Six

Summary: Five times Nyota Uhura called Jim Kirk something other than Captain, and one time he was glad to return the favor.

Chapter Six is set many years after the events of Star Trek: Beyond, focusing on what a potential movie-era in the AOS might look like. I wanted something with the bittersweet vibe of the TOS movie era, but more sweet than bitter, and I think I achieved that. It was also written during a period of upheaval in my own personal life, with a lot of uncertainty about facing the future, and I think that emotion transferred. (Oneshot)

3. The Captain's Log, Redacted, Chapter Five - Distress Signals (Shields Up, Red Alert)

Summary: Or, The Ongoing Saga of "Well That's Not Going in the Report."

Chapter Five is definitely an unashamed demonstration of the Found Family trope, which to me is the defining feature of all my AOS fic. I was very pleased with how this one turned out. (Oneshot)

Star Trek: The Original Series

4. A Night in Sickbay

Summary: Or, The One With the Nightmares Added scene after the curtain falls on Journey to Babel.

I've written a lot of missing scenes from the series, but this one's always been a personal favorite. I think the older I get, the more I enjoy the quiet, gentle stories as much as the more dramatic ones. (Oneshot)

Star Trek: The Original Series & Sherlock Holmes (ACD Canon)

5. However Improbable

Summary: "An ancestor of mine maintained that if you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." - Captain Spock, ST:VI; original quote Sherlock Holmes, The Sign of Four. Two universes, two worlds, one link threatening to destroy them both.

Yes, I wrote a novel-length crossover between two very unlikely universes, many years ago as a just-for-fun NaNoWriMo exercise. Yes, it's ridiculous and niche. Yes, it's still probably my favorite story I've ever written. (Longfic)

[mosaickiwi]

Hi again! Hope you've been doing okay!

First off I just wanna say that you always deliver, I mean "Fall Unto Me"?? Four part+an epilogue of me being torn between wanting to baul my eyes out and wanting to melt into a puddle from the feels :')

But as for the request, could I ask for Angel and [REDACTED] redecorating his appartment? Getting rid of the gaudy furniture once and for all!

Don't forget to drink water and take breaks whenever you need to! My brain is also 105% filled with this skrunkly but the trick is to keep two neurons in a cell reserved for this >:] /silly

HEHE I’ve been ok! Hope you are too!! <3 thank u for appreciating my (deranged) brainrotting fic c: the suffering is my favorite part. I’m drinking lots of water cause summer hates my ass. 💖 Also sorry this is long I am clearly not winning at the "be normal" challenge.

14 Days With You is an 18+ Yandere Visual Novel. MINORS DNI

💜🖤💜🖤💜🖤

Redecorating

“This one?”

The dark haired man peered at the laptop in your hands for a long moment. “It's… nice.”

“Yes…? You called the last three couches nice, too. Any other thoughts?” You gently goaded your partner.

Choosing new furniture with [REDACTED] was supposed to be easy. You'd pick something, and he'd agree. Except you wanted it to feel like home for both of you. He didn't have to say the mushy, obvious line: as long as you were there, it was home. So progress was challenging with some things. You were sitting together on the current couch—the ugly, lifeless one that came with his apartment for some reason. 

His brow crinkled as he searched for different words. Those soft blue eyes went back and forth across the screen until he said, “It’s cozy yet functional.”

“Did you just summarize the description to me?”

He confessed to the crime with a sigh. “Angel, all I think when I look at it is you. And how cute you'd look sitting on it. Like y’do right now.”

“I'm always cute. Focus on the couch, please. Not me,” you insisted.

“No promises.”

“Let's see…” You had to find some way to get through to them. An idea came to mind that you knew he wouldn't like very much, but you had to try. “Pretend we're not dating. Or maybe I don't exist? You come home—don't make that face! I said pretend—so, you come home after a very terrible day and you see this couch. Is it nice then?”

[REDACTED] still made that face as he answered you. “Annoying as fuck to clean.”

It was progress. You didn't want to dwell on why that would be what they thought about after getting home. “Did the first one I showed you seem annoying to clean?”

“Mm... a bit.” They reached forward to change the webpage back for another look. “Y’never showed me these.” 

You leaned over to see what he was talking about. There were a few humongous bean bag chairs on the furniture wish list you’d made. “I just thought they looked fun to take a nap in. But I’m not sure we’d both fit, so it’d be silly," you explained and tapped the mouse to continue skimming through your other selections. “We can think about the couch later. I found some wall art that doesn’t look like it came from a dentist’s office.”

His eyes carefully followed the scrolling page until the bean bags disappeared at the bottom of the screen, but he didn’t protest.

💜🖤💜🖤💜🖤

The new furniture had arrived—and been efficiently assembled by your boyfriend, despite your protest—while you were at the library, so you were excited to get home. [REDACTED] held one hand over your eyes as he unlocked the apartment’s door.

“I already know what all the furniture looks like, Ren.” Even so, you didn’t wave their hand away.

You could hear the door click as he guided you into the foyer. “I may have added a few extra things,” he hummed while you blindly struggled and failed to take off your shoes. “Actually… close your eyes f’me.”

“O—kayy?!” Just as you closed your eyes the floor slipped away under you, replaced by familiar arms cradling you to their chest. His quiet footsteps barely echoed against the marble as you got your wits about you. The living room wasn’t that far, so you were certain where he took you without seeing anything. You just didn’t know where exactly in the room.

They turned and came to a stop, rooted in place for a moment as if thinking to themself. “Y’gonna scream if I drop you?” 

“...Yes. Maybe.”

Without another word he let go. There wasn’t enough time to scream as you immediately landed against plush fabric with the faint crinkle of something below it. The fabric crinkled some more as you felt your shoes being taken off.

“Can I open my eyes yet?” you asked. You could already tell what one of the ‘extra things’ was. It felt like heaven.

“Sure, love.” Their voice was a little farther away than you expected. Probably from hurrying to put your shoes in the closet.

You found yourself nestled on one side of the room, with a perfect view of his handiwork.

A couch that was easy to clean, in a color you insisted he decide on, draped with a luxurious looking blanket that wasn’t in your list. A coffee table with rounded corners so they wouldn’t keep hitting their leg on it. Some wall art of Attack on Giants—with extra pieces from a show you sort of recognized, but definitely suited the man's tastes. A few shelves to show off merchandise from another of your favorites. And the enormous, navy blue bean bag he’d so rudely dropped you in moments ago.

Your darling hacker stepped in from the foyer and tossed their hoodie onto the new couch. “Everything good?” he asked, piercings pulling up in a smile.

“I think I love it.” Your eyes scanned the room again and eventually landed on the pictures. “And I love that you added your own stuff.” It didn’t seem to be a clone of your apartment that he just happened to live in, like you worried about. “What about you?”

“S’better than before. ‘Course, the best part is that I don’t have t’see some shitty couch when I open the door—I get to come home to you, trapped in a bean bag.” He stood up and walked over, eyeing you playfully from above. “Comfortable?”

You nodded, then immediately yelped when he fell forwards. Just before you were squished, he caught himself on tattooed arms, caging you in the crinkly, soft material. You only felt some of their weight on you like a heavy blanket. A soft laugh slipped past your lips as he got comfortable himself, clinging to you as best he could while you both sank further into the depths of the bean bag. It’d be impossible to get out.

You wiggled your legs, straining to even find the damn floor. No doubt a futile effort, you had to sigh, “At least we both fit on it."

[REDACTED] didn’t speak, already yawning from the exhaustion of setting everything up before meeting you at work. The walk to and from the library certainly didn’t do him any favors, either. In a matter of seconds, he was fast asleep in what surely felt akin to a nest, all four lanky limbs wrapped around you like a snake.

[chronicsyd]

Actually, I’ve got a few redactions + Add on's about the long ass post on the S2 trailer I made a couple weeks ago.

So while I still think Vi painted the gauntlets black to disguise herself, I’m thinking the fight with Warwick damages them again because when Vi’s with Ekko here, they are different than how they first appeared. So Ekko and Heimerdinger could repair them before fighting Ambessa, also it would partially explain why he's here fighting with her at all (so to the anon that asked, yes i do agree that Ekko/Heimerdinger probably fixed them)

I’ve been seeing posts about Jinx kinda sorta “adopting” a kid in the new season (you can kinda see them in that clip with Smeech attacking Sevika) and there’s the scene with Undercity people surrounding Jinx having blue hair so my thoughts are now leaning more towards that this is that child in question than something having to do with Jinx or Powder herself. it would also explain Sevika's new look and such.

I'm SUCH an idiot but the gem imbedded in Viktor's wrist is most likely for the arm they showed back in S1, much like how they showed the gauntlets that Vi would eventually be using. I just didn't give the arm a second thought until now despite knowing The Machine Herald already had the third arm (insert face palm here...)

Back to the lines from Vi and Caitlyn from the announcement teaser 3 years ago, it's clear that they're talking about the temple fight that happens later on. Caitlyn has to see this through but she doesn't want to do it alone because she knows that she or Jinx is going to end up dead as a result; but Vi feels she needs to fight Jinx herself because we're probably going to see a bunch of stuff happen before the fight (like the Kiramman tent fight for example) because Vi says "no one else needs to get hurt", but at first I just thought that Vi was talking about Jinx's attack on the Council.

I'm still unsure who's in the orange that Ambessa's talking to because no ones signature color in Arcane has been orange as far as i know (it's been mainly reds, blues, whites, and golds) so I'm thinking that it's a hospital outfit of some sort (I could be wrong, but that's where my thoughts are towards) and she's talking to someone in Piltover that Can implement Martial Law and there's really only 3 examples that could do that: Caitlyn, Jayce, or Mel (if Mel happens to be alive of course. and I'm pretty sure the other Councilor's are about as dead as dogshit, or should be because besides Cassandra did you Really give a fuck about the rest of them?).

someone else pointed this out and I for the Life of me can't find their account but the lines on the floor point to this being Stillwater Hold, so at some point that's where Jinx's base of operations is, or she's just breaking them out but at least in this scene i don't think so.

I'm changing my stance on this, this is happening right before Act 3 (or more specifically, before we see her in the Ambessa fight). mainly because while the lighting is damn near impossible to make out, i think her hair is cut in this scene, she's also missing the ropes on her top. Mainly because when we see her with the finger prosthetic she still has her braids and that's Definitely happening post Act 1. so she's crying about something different from Silco here and I'm having a dreading idea on what it is...

I don't think Vi is carrying Cait on her shoulders, mainly because with the lighting the vest looks brown but when we see Caitlyn her vest is very clearly black. So not exactly sure who it is, I'm kinda thinking it's the blue fish guy (is Arcane gonna give us the names of Caitlyn's comrades yet?!) and the explosion we see with him isn't the same one that knocked Vi down. but that's just hypothetical, the only thing I'm Sure about is that Vi isn't carrying Caitlyn at least.

I have NO idea Why and I have NO credible sources on this but for some reason my brain keeps telling Sevika's dying. No i don't know the how or the when but it'd just be another tally of grief for Jinx (because we're probably going to see them get close despite their animosity back in S1) (and let's be real anyone that takes on even a Slight "parenting" role to Vi or Jinx is getting the axe, i don't make the rules)

So far the only thing I'm having trouble placing is uhhh everyone that Isn't Vi, Jinx or Caitlyn. because they've been Massively marketing the three of them but when it comes to people like Viktor and Jayce not a fucking clue. We got that clip of Ekko and Heimerdinger sneaking into Piltover where they probably do some sorta hextech experimenting but that's really the limit of my knowledge. I know the people I was confused about have to do with Viktor and the Glorious Evolution thing but other than that, I've really only got solid thoughts on our three ladies for the season.

Also it seems like tomorrow they're probably going to be showing us what they showed at the Annecy festival for pit fighter Vi back in June so... can't wait for that!

and that's what i got for now...

[c-t-r-l14]

Let me just start off saying that I think you're the most constructive thinker when it comes to Alex. When they first broke off, Gremlin faced most of the hate, and now it's shifted mostly on to him. If you've ever listened to Redacted, it reminds me of the Geordi and Cutie debacle.

Seeing that it doesn't seem like Alex's storyline is ending anytime soon, I do hope that the Fandom will be able to see the nuances of their revival. I do hope that if we get a therapy-centered audio, Alex will be able to expand upon just how much he brushed Gremiln off in their break up vid and almost intentionally put them on the back-burner. Gremlin was the last to know about NY, and it's understandable if they feel guilty about him no longer taking the gig. I, along with those who still have Alex in some favor, just want to see some truth and honesty without others placing full blame on either party.

Anyways, sorry for the long ask. Ever since Luca has "died down," Alex has been my #1 since his photoshoot audios, and I had to talk about it somewhere. On one hand, I won with him coming back, but I am royally screwed if his ending is based on a poll, lol. I look forward to more commentary from you.

One of the biggest reasons why I started making these rants in the first place is actually something I could describe in one word: fairness.

And I say this because the way Alex treated Gremlin during the break up was not fair. The way the fandom treated Gremlin the first few months after the break up audio dropped wasn’t fair either. It seemed like they were placing all the blame on them, and while it is partly their fault—it seemed like people didn’t exactly realize how truly messed up the way he handled the break up was. And I will never forget those first few months. One of the biggest reasons why I started these rants was to make people see that Alex was wrong in this, too—and the way that only one party was being blamed was not fair.

With time, the hate for Gremlin died down, and that’s when people really started to question Alex’s integrity throughout all this. And one of the biggest reasons why I think that was because people let the audio marinate, and really started to closely analyze Alex’s behavior—and give it some thought. That was the thing—the fandom had time to see the mistakes that Alex made, and I honestly feel like that’s really what the fandom needs right now—time. I feel like they really need time to settle down and look at both sides, the break up, and the faults that lies between both of them. Both of them did something wrong, and both of them aren’t free from criticism. In the audio, it’s very clear that Alex has made much progress with the way he tried to understand Gremlin’s mindset when they made the cheating accusations—and he made sure to apologize for that. He made sure that they knew that this wasn’t entirely their fault—he literally said it in the audio. He apologized for the some of the things he said. And yes, while there is some more accountability that he needs to take, it seems like people are looking at the things he didn’t do rather than the things he did do. He this time, didn’t make excuses, nor gaslight, and I certainly don’t see anything of the guilt tripping people are talking about. He does recognize some of the things he did, and is willing to try to work things out—all of these traits he showed in this audio was a far cry from the way he acted during the break up audio. I think before Saku puts up the poll—he should give the fandom a chance to calm down and see the nuances in their relationship. Although I do understand why people still hate him, I feel like they’re not seeing the progress Alex is trying to make. I find it kind of uncanny. They seem to be blind to his progress, just as they were initially blind to his mistakes.

And that isn’t fair, either.

I honestly was thinking about a therapy centered audio, too. Even though some of the problems were addressed, not all of them were—and I want them both to tackle that in therapy.

Thank you kindly for the ask, Anon! ❤️

[camile-leon]

sanders sides

hello the special interest brain rot has hit once more and I’m writing it here because :)

okay so currently for characterizations:

Red “Roman”: Fanciful/Dreams/Passionate Side, However I feel is growing to be more representative of or taking more responsibility for C!Thomas’s Motivations. Presides over Left Arm, Brainstorm Mode, and Summons things very easily. Has a sword. One of the Primary Sides and Colors. Prince of the Imagination. Insecure and working on it. (?) Arc in progress.

Orange “REDACTED”: theorized to be Wrath or some form of Rage, based off of all of the ostrich sized Easter eggs. *See the “See/Speak/Hear” theory below*. Previously seen as the orange fruit (Thomas doesn’t like fruit? 🤔), and possessing Logan’s Eyes as he finished ranting his arc motivations to remus. Notable uses of the color include as text in the SvS redux game, saying “hello” using *upside down calculator* (👀) speak.

Yellow “Janus”: Deceit/Self-Preservation, and recently accepted, or, at the least working hand in hand with patton. Can silence/repress any of the sides, disguise self as any of the sides, and also can summon things when inside the mindscape. Has a shepherds cane. I feel like has a strong or at the least secure ego after being resisted on the mere basis of his presence alone and continuing to offer arguments without giving up. He responded after Roman made fun of his name yes, but like that was fair, and even though it hurt, it did give insight on how much Janus knows about Romans insecurity. Primary color.

Green “Remus”: Intrusive Thoughts, and by extension repressed thoughts?? Can conjure out of the mindscape, cast shadows over vision(?), allergic to soap. Carries a Mace. Duke of the Imagination. Chaos incarnate and ego doesn’t GAF. My theory is, because of the unique connection to repressed thoughts, he can bring out the repressed sides when out of Thomas’s direct consciousness’s “line of sight”. Maybe teams up with Janus for that ability? Idk.

Navy Blue (Dark Blue) “Logan”: Logical Thinking/Rational Thoughts/Local Librarian. Has incredible memory recall and database. Carries or Conjures Flashcards. One of the Primary Sides and Colors. Only side to not reveal own name. Closest contact with the orange side. Wants to use the chemistry degree. Mid Arc. Secure Ego is struggling because of arc.

Light Blue (Cyan) “Patton”: Morality/ the Feelings(??). Head honcho like Joy in Inside Out. Can use Nostalgic/Sensory memory. Can turn into a giant frog when overwhelmed? Possibly a primary color? one of the primary sides. Unstable ego/sense of Thomas’s self.

Purple “Virgil”: previously black color. Anxiety/Fight or Flight. Increases anxiety levels in whoever, eyeshadow levels indicate anxiety, can magnify and multiply voice, can also make things darker. Has built a more secure ego, but is still defensive at times. Pet spider. Theory is that paranoia is old version? Future version? Coexisting part that needs stability which makes sense.

color theory:

complimentary colors- the characters at odds to each other. Red green/Yellow Purple/blue orange. the first two groups don’t like each other like at all. HOWEVER, i think Logan and tangerine would work together??

also, Primary Colors- I think Janus, Logan, and a form of creativity(?) are the oldest. I think it took time before orange, patton, and Virgil were developed. But! I think the creative split happened latest, with remus and Roman being youngest in the group unless patton is cyan in which case I think that uses green so then patton is youngest which is SO FUNNY.

see, hear, speak: ???

Janus= can hide other sides entirely, can silence other sides entirely, I don’t think effects ears directly

Remus= can make other sides quieter? (Could also be just movie making and focus), can make the screen black, I don’t think effects other sides mouths directly.

virgil= can make voice louder/multiply, can make the screen black, I don’t think effects ears directly

orange= effects eyes “blinded with rage”, I don’t know anything else ʅ（◞‿◟）ʃ

now you may be asking why is a primary color getting the perks of the secondary colors?? I don’t know. It’s a darkside thing?? I Guess?? Catholicism!

I love psycho analyzing my faves <3

and this concludes my note to self theory notes.

thank you Thomas sanders for my favorite special interest, giving my therapist an in to understanding/communicating with my brain, and for still sharing all of the fun you bring to content in such a wide variety.

it’s very weird and para social but I would love to give you a hug one day, and to share the PowerPoint I made in middle school as a leadership project based off of you and the sides (of which I saved the very enthusiastic and uninhabited script of a first special interest). I aspire to remain even half as busy as all of your projects. Absolute wildest dreams would be to work with you on a creative project.

does anyone know where to send fanmail? Is it just Twitter?