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#and yes the scars wouldn't have looked like THAT but this is my party and I can do what I want
asparklethatisblue · 1 year
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Did you know you could get your tits chopped clean off in the Victorian Era already? A true win for the overlap of the polar explorer and trans communities...
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steddiealltheway · 11 months
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Everyone thinks that Steve and Eddie hate each other. No matter how many times they insist that yes, they were once jealous of each other, but now they are friends, no one believes them. The whole party and even Robin, Nancy, Jonathan, and Argyle think that it's just some big joke that the two of them are friends.
Even with matching scars, shared trauma, and spending time together healing from both of those things, no one can wrap their heads around Steve and Eddie being friends. So much so that when they interact with each other, everyone insists that they don't have to pretend to like each other.
It gets to the point that Steve and Eddie have to hang out alone and avoid each other in group settings. "It feels like you're my secret lover or something," Steve jokes while staring up at Eddie's bedroom ceiling.
Eddie huffs a laugh while lightly strumming his guitar. "I'm not sure what we're going to do at Dustin's birthday party."
Steve sits up and looks at Eddie. "His what?"
"His birthday party this weekend," Eddie says still strumming. Steve stares at him cluelessly and that's when Eddie puts down his guitar. "Hey, I'm sure he just already thought he invited you," Eddie insists and gives Steve's hand a squeeze.
"Or he's having separate parties as if we're divorced parents," Steve groans. "I don't get it. Yes, in high school we were not friends and probably never would have been-"
"Ouch," Eddie interrupts and pretends he's been struck in the heart. He flops back on his bed and stares up at Steve. "You flatter me too much, Harrington."
Steve snorts, "Yeah as if you wouldn't have avoided me like the plague in high school if I tried to talk to you. Not that I blame you." He stares down and runs a hand through Eddie's curly hair. Soft.
Eddie hums and leans into the touch. He really is adorable. Steve thinks out loud, "I don't see how anyone could hate you."
"Except most of the town still."
"Anyone who knows you," Steve elaborates. Eddie just shrugs in response. Steve takes a moment to think to himself.
"What's going on?" Eddie asks.
Steve smiles and shakes his head. "Nothing."
"You stopped playing with my hair and there's worry all over that pretty face," Eddie flirts, but Steve is used to it by now equating it to Eddie's charm.
Steve looks down at him and brushes a strand of hair behind Eddie's ear. He hesitates before saying, "Do you think... Well, Robin said... I just- Never mind." He glances away before Eddie can read what's on his mind which seems to be a gift of his.
The mattress shifts slightly as Eddie sits up and puts a hand on Steve's cheek instantly soothing him. He raises his eyebrows and has the look in his big doe eyes that says you know you can talk to me.
"Do you think there's a weird tension between us?" Steve asks. "I mean, that's what everyone says when I ask why they think we hate each other."
Eddie takes a few moments seemingly considering the thought, but then he shrugs. "Not that I'm aware of."
Steve nods and leans forward until his head rests in the crook of Eddie's neck. "I'm going to have to convince Dustin that we can be in the same room together for this party, aren't I?"
Eddie chuckles and presses a kiss to the top of Steve's head. "I think you are especially since we haven't interacted in front of anyone for a few weeks now."
"Has it really been that long?" Steve asks turning slightly so he isn't basically mouthing against Eddie's neck. He feels Eddie nod and he huffs a sigh. "That kid is so stubborn."
"I think we're to blame for that," Eddie replies.
"Now we really sound like divorced parents," Steve says then sits back. "I've gotta go talk to him."
"I'll walk you out," Eddie says.
Steve doesn't remember when it became a thing for them, but he can't remember the last time Eddie didn't walk him to the door and hug him goodbye. Steve lingers in the embrace for as long as Eddie allows - which is always as long as Steve needs.
"Good luck," Eddie says as Steve pulls away.
"Thanks," Steve says and lingers in Eddie's space for a few moments longer. In times like this, he can feel the tension that Robin talks about, and he doesn't know why but it feels like he's missing something.
As he makes his way out the door with a parting squeeze to Eddie's arm he wishes he could talk to someone about it. Maybe Robin will stop thinking he's joking soon because for some reason he thinks she could help.
-:-:-:-:-:-
After a long conversation insisting he and Eddie could be in the same room together, Dustin finally gives in and invites him to the party. Then Steve has to get an even longer lecture about how he can't be rude to the Hellfire members no matter how much he hates Eddie.
Steve just brushes it off, but as the day of the party approaches, he gets more and more anxious. He really doesn't want to draw attention to himself and Eddie, but he wants to talk to his friend free of judgment. Eddie insists that things will be fine and this is their opportunity to convince people that they're friends.
For some reason it hurts Steve a little, but it's probably because his friends don't believe him and definitely not about him and Eddie just being friends.
He pushes that thought out of his mind by the time he approaches the Wheeler's house which was declared the ultimate party spot although Steve told Dustin his parents would be gone and he was more than happy to have everyone over. Maybe this party really is the time to show everyone that he and Eddie can more than tolerate each other.
Steve knocks on the door which quickly opens to Eddie on the other side. Without thinking, Steve does their usual greeting by hugging Eddie.
It's as if Steve punched him or something because the house goes silent.
"Okay, you two break it up. Just because it's my birthday doesn't mean you have to go out of your way to be nice to each other," Dustin says, pushing the hug apart before launching himself into his and Steve's handshake. Steve then pulls Dustin into a hug and rustles his hair while wishing him a happy birthday. Dustin thanks him and runs off to the basement following the rest of the group.
Steve glances over to Eddie who is staring at him in slight awe and what looks like a bit of confusion. "You've never seen the handshake?" Steve asks.
Eddie shakes his head, "No-" his voice cracks and he clears his throat. "No, I have not. It's..."
"Pretty nerdy, I know, but-"
Eddie holds his hand up and cuts him off, "It was sweet. You're um... you're really sweet to him. Hey, is it hot in here?"
"I think it's just me," Steve flirts with a big smile.
"I think it is," Eddie replies somewhat serious sounding.
Steve is about to flirt more when a loud ahem from beside them that Steve definitely recognizes interrupts. "Robin?" He asks before turning and giving her a brief hug. "What are you doing here?"
"Dustin invited me as a buffer," she answers honestly. "You didn't see me when you got in? I was obnoxiously waving for like a full minute."
Steve shakes his head and runs a hand through his hair. "No, I was uhh... I guess I was distracted."
Eddie bumps his shoulder and says, "Do I distract you, Harrington?"
Steve rolls his eyes and bumps his shoulder back. "Go to the basement before you distract me some more, Munson."
Eddie winks before making his way to the basement, and Steve can't help but watch to make sure he gets there safely. If he's learned anything about Eddie is that he is a bit of a clutz.
"Oh my god," Robin says and smacks Steve's arm hard.
"Ow. What?" Steve says rubbing at his arm.
Robin gestures to the stairs and points accusatorily to Steve. "When did you and Eddie hook up, and why didn't you tell me?"
Steve snorts, "Really? You go from thinking we're enemies to secret lovers just like that?"
"Yes! Because I finally figured out the tension! I have to tell Nancy!" Robin says already running up the stairs.
"I knew you had ulterior motives!" Steve yells back and Robin turns to flip him off before she's out of sight.
Steve sighs as he hears yelling from down the stairs. Time to embrace the madness.
As he makes his way down the stairs, he can hear what sounds like an argument about some campaign Eddie had been telling him about. He spots El and Max first who huddle in a corner, rolling their eyes and whispering. Steve makes eye contact with them and gives them sympathetic looks.
He turns and finds Eddie standing on the couch, yelling down at Mike and Dustin who seem to be arguing about some character while the rest of Eddie's Hellfire friends try to interject in random ways. They all have slight smiles on their faces - especially Eddie - so Steve knows he doesn't have to break anything up.
That is until he spots Will behind them all looking off in slight distress. Steve knows it's been a bit hard for him to get back into things since he came back because not only was the whole mindflayer thing really horrible, but not being a part of Hellfire really made him feel out of the loop sometimes. Luckily, Lucas had his back and made sure to stick by his side since he could relate with the whole basketball thing.
When Eddie glances over, Steve shoots him a look and glances toward Will. Eddie takes the hint and clears his throat. "Well, it is Dusitn's birthday, so I guess I'll have to agree with him for today. But in our next campaign, there will be no room for arguments! Especially if I can get the infamous Will the Wise to help me with it."
Will gives Eddie a smile and seems to light up at the idea. "Yeah, I- I'd really like that."
Eddie hops off the couch and offers his hand out to Will who takes it and shakes it quickly. "Welcome to Hellfire. Now, what does the birthday boy have in mind?"
Before Dustin can respond, Lucas interrupts him and yells to the girls, "Get the tape!"
The girls comply and Eddie looks at Steve and shrugs then pats his lap. "Looks like there's one free seat available."
Steve laughs and rolls his eyes, but he ends up sitting in Eddie's lap as everyone stares. "What? I'm not sitting on the floor when there's an open spot."
"There's literally a free chair right to your left," Mike says.
Steve turns and looks. Sure enough, he's right. "We don't want El and Max sitting on the floor. Now what's this film about?"
"Yeah, what's the film?" Dustin asks.
Steve glances over to Will who has a small smile on his face. Steve suddenly remembers the camera Will had been sneaking around for the summer, and it all starts to add up.
El and Max return with a film that Max puts in the VHS player and announces, "Introducing some of our favorite Dustin moments."
Everyone laughs as Dustin watches in horror all the videos pieced together of him. Steve is surprised to notice he made the cut in a lot of them, but he's more excited when he sees Eddie.
Then, Steve tenses as he notices a video from Family Video that he didn't know was being taken. He recognizes the girl, and even worse, he recognizes the signature Harrington charm as he flirts with her. Dustin mocks him in the video, and he ends up running up to Steve and scaring the girl away.
Everyone around them including Dustin laughs, but Eddie tenses. Steve doesn't know why he feels the urge to soothe him so badly, but he finds himself whispering, "That was weeks ago, you can tell by the length of my hair." He doesn't know why he needs Eddie to know that, but he does. He reaches up and starts running a hand through Eddie's hair. "I promise, Eddie."
"I know," Eddie says sincerely and leans into the touch like he always does.
"Okay, why are you guys acting like that?" Dustin asks, and suddenly Steve remembers where he is and realizes everyone is staring at them.
Steve guiltily puts his hand down. "Like what?"
"Like you're in love or something," Dustin says. Steve freezes. In love. "You guys can cut the act and go back to avoiding each other. It's okay."
"We don't hate each other," Steve groans, "I don't know where you got the idea from."
One of Eddie's friends laughs, "We know Eddie and we know what you were like in high school. You two would never get along."
Everyone joins in agreeing, and Steve gets fed up. "Yes, we wouldn't have gotten along in high school! But things are different now!"
Everyone continues going on over Steve. Eddie looks at him and insists, "It's fine, Steve, they'll eventually come around to the idea of us being friends."
And for some reason, that's what makes Steve snap. He's not sure what overcomes him, but he raises his voice and says, "Just look how friendly we can be!"
Then, he cups Eddie's cheek and kisses him with everything he has. The room fills with silence again except for the tape that's still running, but the worst part is that Eddie stays frozen. Steve pulls back and realizes what he's done.
Eddie looks anywhere that isn't at Steve and says, "I need to go."
Steve stands up and lets Eddie run off.
Everyone stares at Steve in silence, but after a few moments, Max shoves Steve. "Go after him, idiot. This is what happens when no one listens to me about the tension between them being sexual!"
Everyone groans, but then Will joins in telling Steve to go after him.
Steve looks at Dustin who appears to be in shock and asks, "Can I go?"
It takes a few moments to process but then Dustin nods. "You can if I get credit for getting you guys together," Dustin replies with a big smile.
"I love you guys," Steve says then takes off as everyone yells at him to go.
Steve sprints up the stairs and runs into Robin. "Where'd he go?"
"The front door just- Where are you going?" Robin shouts after him as Steve races out the front door.
"I'm about to confront that tension!" Steve yells back and closes the door behind him. He looks in the driveway and notices Eddie's van is missing. But he knows exactly where he is.
As Steve gets into his car, he notices a few raindrops on his windshield. A glance up and he notices the sky looks like it is about to open up and completely flood Hawkins. "Well, this is great," Steve says sarcastically and quickly takes off toward Skull Rock.
He gets there in record time and immediately spots Eddie's van where he usually parks. By now it's pouring down rain, and Steve knows he didn't leave an umbrella inside his car. He looks down at his clean shoes and sighs, "Sorry guys, this is going to be worth it though. Why the hell am I talking to my shoes? Losing my mind..." Steve trails off as he takes off into the woods.
He finds skull rock easily and climbs it quickly managing not to slip on the slick rock. He finds Eddie laying in his favorite pit staring up at the sky. "Go away, Harrington," Eddie says not even sparing Steve a glance. His eyes are a bit red and Steve can't tell if the water going down his face is rain or tears. Probably both.
"Just hear me out," Steve pleads. "Just right now, and if you want, we can tell everyone they were right, and you never have to interact with me again."
"I don't want that, Steve," Eddie says barely loud enough to be heard over the rain.
"Don't want to listen?" Steve asks.
Eddie's lip slightly quivers and he sits up so Steve can't see him. "Don't want to lose you."
Steve walks closer to Eddie and sits behind him. "You could never lose me."
Eddie laughs humorously, "I think you will after I tell you this."
Steve's heart races as he asks, "Tell me what?"
Eddie takes a deep breath in and out. "I'm gay, Steve. And to make matters worse, I have had the biggest crush on you since before the Vecna shit, man. And you kissed me, and I just... I know I'm always going to want that. And I'm so sorry."
Steve's heartbeat is practically in his ears at this point. "You know that tension I was talking about a few days ago?" Eddie nods. "I've felt it since we first met. At first, I thought it was maybe hatred or jealousy, but then those feelings went away but the tension was still there. But tonight Dustin said the whole 'in love' thing and Max called it sexual tension-"
"She did what?"
"And I realized," Steve continues, "I think... I think I've also had a crush on you for longer than I even knew, but I could never find the words for it."
Eddie turns around and looks at him. "You don't have to lie to me."
"I'm not, and you know that I would never lie to you." Eddie raises his eyebrows. "Okay, except when you make food because sometimes it's really awful, Eddie."
Eddie snorts. "Kick a man while he's down."
Steve smiles when he sees a small smile on Eddie's face. "I really like you, Eddie. And I know how dramatic you are, so here I am in the pouring rain confessing my feelings for you."
Eddie laughs, and Steve stands up. "I like you!" Steve yells with his arms out wide. "Please tell me this is working!"
Eddie throws his head back as he laughs and then stands up and makes his way to Steve. He cups his face and says, "It's definitely working."
"Yeah?" Steve asks with a big smile.
"Yes, now kiss me again or it will no longer be working," Eddie jokes, but Steve is already leaning in and kissing him.
This time Eddie kisses back.
When they return later for cake, Dustin just shakes his head at them and says, "You could've told us you were hooking up the whole time."
Steve groans as he tries to towel dry his hair, but Eddie leans in and whispers, "Just go with it," before giving him a kiss on the cheek.
And although everyone insists that they knew they were hooking up the whole time, Steve couldn't be any happier.
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lilmouzee · 4 months
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Love hurts just like a knife.
Angst, mention of drugs and alcohol, mention of abusive family, sanzu slapping reader, name calling (Bitch.), gaslighting.
Zee's note - This is mainly a re-write from an old ask on my old account, I'll link if I'm too lazy to find it. Yes, I'm writing sanzu as a pill popper. Don't like it? Don't read this. Not tryna deal with someone harassing me over this again. Anyway, I've been in the mood for Angst, so here we go.
Part two here
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Sanzu seemed stand offish when you first met him through the haitani brothers. Mean, cold, and cruel from the stories you were told, the way he'd laugh like a rabid dog when shooting down traitors. Ran always teased you about how sanzu might come for you next if you continued being so scared of him, saying that sanzu loved putting fear in people. Part of you believed him while the other half brushed him off, you were friends with the haitani brothers, you knew important information, sanzu would never harm you, right?
It took you months to strike up a conversation with sanzu, and with your luck, it truly was the one thing sanzu hated people mentioning. The scars that littered the corners of his mouth. The way his eyes slowly turned to look into yours, ice clinking in the bottle of whiskey he held, almost made you regret talking to him in the first place. Why ask about the scars? Was it too personal? What if he actually hated you more than before now. "Hey, are you even listening?" He asked after taking a sip of the whiskey he held in his left hand, the ring on his index finger clinking against the glass as a warning sign to pay attention or fuck off, but slowly sanzu opened up to you about the scars and his past. About how he lives to serve mikey, the drug addiction that followed him in his early teenage years.
After that night, everything seemed to hit when you'd talk to sanzu. Of course, everyone took notice and warned that sanzu wasn't one you'd want to settle down with. It wouldn't be the life you'd wish for, but the words went through one ear and out the other, leaving no sinister thought behind. Only a year passed before you asked sanzu to be your boyfriend, sanzu, agreeing immediately extatic to have you as his partner in crime, so happy to share his life with you. Calling the haitani brothers for drinks to celebrate the moment. Unfortunately, old habits are hard to break. The alcohol flowing through sanzu made him miss the high he got from pills, sparking the idea for him to call an old plug and get his usual order. The haitani brothers already having made their exit from the party knowing just how sanzu got.
Unfortunately for you, sanzu was already feeling the pills wear off after having been out for hours, not bothering to text you though he heard every call and read every message you sent him, discarding them as "Just trying to kill the mood." You figured maybe his phone died and that he'd be home soon. Which was true for the most part the lock on the front door clicking, letting you know it was being unlocked, sanzus long figure walking in through the door brushing past you as you got up to greet him, brushing it off as just him needing a moment. Sanzu almost falling onto the couch, legs spread, eyes half open while the TV played another commercial "Sanzu, Love. I made dinner, it's a bit cold now but I can heat it for you" hearing those words seemd to annoy sanzu more then please him, waving you off with his hand "I don't want it." He just replied with an annoyed sigh.
Sanzu, not wanting to eat, was rare. He'd always at least try a couple bites to not go on an empty stomach, especially with alcohol in his system. "Sanzu, I really do think you should at least take a few bites of it," you pleaded, not noticing how pissed off sanzu became. "Are you my mother or something?" Sanzu asked, his voice saturated with sarcasm as he got up from the couch heading straight towards the bedroom you two shared."sanzu, please." Before you could think of continuing your sentence, sanzu stopped dead in his tracks, the back of his hand quickly connecting with the back of your cheek, "GOD DAMN BITCH, WHAT DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND ABOUT NO? I DON'T WANT YOUR STUPID FUCKING FOOD." Sanzu screamed while you just stared at him, cheek blazing hot, a red mark already appearing as tears streamed down your face, pissing sanzu off even more. "You're such a fucking crybaby you know that? So weak and pitiful, trying to act as if you're the victim because of a little slap. Get the fuck out of my face before I do worse, Y/N"
Sanzus words ran through your mind while you stared in the bathroom mirror at red hand print on your face. Memories of your parents cornering you and beating you while yelling about how stupid you were over a spilled glass of water, memories of them slapping you when you couldnt get an A++ on a quiz, blaming it on how you didnt study enough and goofed off, locking you inside your room for hours to force you to do better, to be better.
Everyone was right, though. Sanzu wasn't worth involving yourself with.
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masterjasper223 · 2 years
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Prove It
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(Warnings: underage sex, dom/sub undertones)
You creep into the Hospital Wing, over to the only occupied bed. You don't need to light your wand; the room is flooded with moonlight. Draco is asleep, but starts awake the moment you press your fingers to his cheek.
"What are you doing here?" he hisses, glancing at the door to Madam Pomfrey's office.
You sit down on the edge of the bed, wincing as it creaks. "I was so scared, when I heard. She wouldn't let me see you--"
"Well, I'm fine," Draco replies, gruffly, pulling the blankets up over his stomach and avoiding your gaze. "I'll be out in a few days."
You glance at his still-exposed chest, and your brow creases with concern at the number of bandages. There are even some on his forearms. "Potter did this, didn't he?" you whisper, gently tracing the white scars criss-crossing his flesh in between the gauze. Draco watches your fingers with an unreadable expression, and inclines his head, yes, when you glance at him, seeking an answer.
"But I'm fine," he reiterates, gently but firmly pushing your hand away. "Really."
You don't miss the little grimace he makes as your fingers pull back from his skin, as if he's in pain, and on a whim you decide to call his bluff.
"Prove it."
"What?"
"If you're really fine, then prove it."
Draco scowls, and shoots you a pointed look, but you shake your head and jump to your feet.
"I'm so sick of your lies, Draco. You're not fine, you haven't been fine all year! Something's changed, and you're not telling me. I--"
Draco sits up, tugs on the front of your robes and presses a hand to your lips, effectively shutting you up. "Quiet. Do you want Pomfrey to come in here?" he hisses, jerking his head at the door to her office. "If you promise to stop talking, then fine- I'll prove it."
Your eyes widen as that familiar cocky smirk twists the corner of his mouth, and with a jolt you realise it's the first time you've seen it since you got off the train, several months ago.
"So?" Draco presses, pushing his hand more firmly against your lips. "Do you promise, or not?"
You try to pull his hand away so you can speak, but his grip is like a vice and your futile efforts only earn you another smirk. You even try licking his palm to get him to remove his hand, but he just raises his eyebrows at you. Finally, exasperated, you nod your head.
"Good."
Draco releases your mouth, and makes a show of getting comfortable, arranging the pillows to support his back.
"Since you're here, why don't you fluff my pillows for me?" he says, haughtily, once you've caught your breath.
You roll your eyes as you comply, wondering what exactly he has in mind, because this certainly isn't proof of anything- although it is reminiscent of the domineering Draco you're used to hanging around, who has been conspicuously absent this year.
As for what he has in mind, you don't have to wait long to find out.
Draco pats his thigh, and you realise that the blanket has settled around his hips, leaving his torso bare- and not a great deal to the imagination.
"Come here. Sit."
You open your mouth to protest, but Draco preemptively raises a finger to silence you.
"You promised, remember?"
You gape at him for a moment, but decide that it can't hurt to do as he says. You've sat on his lap before, after all, at student parties you were invited to and whatnot- platonically, of course. You've always been very comfortable around each other, having been friends since childhood, before Hogwarts. This isn't all that different- not really.
So when you take a seat on his thighs, side-on, quietly hoping that you're not too heavy for him, Draco's reaction takes you by surprise.
"Not like that," he huffs, shamelessly adjusting himself through the blanket. "Face me."
Face him? Straddle him?
You frown, and a slight flush creeps up your neck- you get the distinct impression he's not wearing anything under the blanket- but you do as you are bid, straddling him just above the knees, and look at him expectantly.
Draco slicks back his hair and shakes his head, looking a little exasperated.
"Closer," he murmurs, patting his thigh, right next to the spot he adjusted just a moment ago. "Don't worry, _________. I won't bite... much."
He smirks and you scowl, now convinced that he is fucking with you- but this is what you've been missing all these months. The light-hearted banter, the teasing, the camaraderie- the closeness.
So you shuffle forwards, and plant yourself exactly where he indicated.
"Good girl," he breathes, and the words would have been much more delicious if not for that shit-eating grin. "Now..." He jerks his head at the empty goblet and pitcher of water on his bedside. "Pour me a drink."
You give him a look, and move to get off of him- it would be rather awkward and difficult to pour a drink from here- but Draco grabs your shoulder and holds you in place. "I didn't say you could get up."
Swallowing a huff of frustration, you lean forwards and sideways, stretching out your hands. You manage to avoid pressing your chest against Draco's, but there's no escaping the fact that you're now putting your full weight on his lap.
And it only takes a moment before you begin to feel... something.
Something stirring between your thighs- something that isn't you.
You're pretty sure your cheeks are on fire, but you decide not to address it, instead focusing on pouring the water without dropping the pitcher.
Of course, it's a little hard to concentrate when that something is getting bigger and firmer by the second, but you manage to right yourself with the goblet in hand and not a drop spilled.
"Thank you," says Draco, taking the goblet from you without a trace of bashfulness. He drinks deeply- it seems he was actually thirsty- and when only a mouthful remains, he offers it to you. You shake your head, but he presses it to your lips anyway and whispers, "Drink."
You roll your eyes, thinking that he's just on a power trip at this point, but you obediently swallow the remaining gulp, and lean forward to place the goblet back on the bedside.
"Do you believe me yet?" he asks, when you straighten up again, pale grey eyes flicking between yours. "We're all stressed this year, with N.E.W.T.s coming up. And with Father in- I mean, you know what he's like. I can't- I can't afford to fail."
This last sentence sounds heavier than it should, but it makes perfect sense. You know all too well what Lucius Malfoy is like, and even though he's currently in Azkaban, (a subject the two of you rigorously avoid), you can only imagine what he would say if he found out his son had come home with anything less than an O or an E.
So why aren't you convinced?
You're not sure, but you decide to be honest, and slowly shake your head, 'no'.
Draco slicks his hair back again, regarding you through half-lidded eyes- then suddenly he's smirking, naturally and easily, all trace of bitterness gone, as if he's really, truly enjoying himself.
"Have it your way, then," he chuckles, leaning forward slightly, so that his warm breath fans over your face. Then he pauses, tucks a lock of hair behind your ear, and beckons to you until you lean in close enough for him to press his lips against the shell of your ear, as if he's sharing a secret.
"Here's what's going to happen. You're going to keep your mouth shut- not a word, not a sound- and I'm going to fuck you, like this-" he rolls his hips demonstratively, "-until you pass out, right here, in this bed. If that doesn't convince you that I'm fine, nothing will."
You swallow thickly as Draco draws back, cocky smirk firmly in place.
"Oh, and if you want to continue, pull your robes up," he adds, settling himself against the pillows and folding his arms behind his head. "They'll just get in the way."
You glance over your shoulder at the door to the matron's room. Even if you were horny and impulsive enough to take him up on his offer, there's no way you won't get caught.
But Draco's one step ahead of you. He pulls out his wand and flicks it at the door, muttering, "Muffliato," then again at the nearest privacy screen, causing it to unfold around the bed of its own accord.
Biting down on your lip, you decide to throw caution to the wind, and draw your robes up around your hips, revealing your panties.
"Good girl," Draco praises, flicking his wand at your crotch. Your panties fall away as if cut by invisible scissors, and he stuffs them in your pocket. "Now, lift that pretty arse a moment- that's it..."
Setting his wand aside, and with one arm still folded behind his head, Draco lazily tugs the covers down his body until his cock springs free. He begins to stroke himself with practised ease, thumb swirling the tip, curled fingers providing just the right amount of pressure...
"Touch yourself," he murmurs, smirking knowingly as you bite your lip, swallowing a moan as you watch his fingers at work. "And do a good job, because I'm not going to touch you until you're dripping wet."
Suppressing a whimper, you start rubbing your clit, letting your eyes rove over every inch of Draco you can see, and watching him pump his cock, until you're wet enough to dip two fingers inside yourself and use your own slick to lubricate your slit.
"Keep going," Draco growls, panting slightly as he watches you right back. "I want to be able to see how wet you are for me- but don't you dare come until I make you."
You bite down harder on your lip. It's getting harder and harder to stay in control, because you're now having to suppress two things: your voice, and an imminent orgasm.
You're not sure how long you've been touching yourself when you feel a drop of moisture trickle down your trembling inner thigh, and Draco swears under his breath, releasing his cock in favour of tracing your slit with his finger. It comes away soaked, and the extra stimulation is nearly enough to make you come undone on the spot.
He licks his finger clean with a sinful swirl of his tongue, then grips the base of his cock and lines up the tip with your entrance, rubbing it teasingly against your folds until he feels your nails pinch his forearm in warning.
"Ow..." He glances up at you, and the self-satisfied smirk slips, as if he's suddenly unsure of himself. "Do you want to stop?"
You pinch him again, and frantically shake your head, 'no'.
"Ow!" He swats playfully at your arse in retaliation. "Okay, okay. No more pinching."
Then he mumbles something you don't quite catch, that sounds like, 'I just don't want to hurt you', or maybe 'I don't want to hurt you, too'- you're not sure which- but a half-second later you've forgotten all about it as he begins guiding you down on his cock.
It's too much and too good all at once, and you come for him, there and then, before he's even a third of the way inside you. Draco presses his palm over your lips and bites down on his own, hips bucking involuntarily as your walls flutter around his sensitive tip.
He waits as long as he can stand before he starts moving again, pushing his cock deeper and deeper until he's all the way in, filling you completely, and leaving you a trembling, incoherent mess.
That's when he starts rolling his hips, as promised, releasing your mouth in favour of sliding his hands under your robes to grip the bare skin of your waist, biceps flexing as he moves you up and down over his cock.
When you come for him again, he crashes his lips against yours, kissing you like a man half-starved. And all the while, he doesn't stop moving; rolling his hips, swirling his cock around inside of you, so that you're practically coming for him non-stop. He swallows every last one of your moans, occasionally swatting at your arse when you get too loud, and you begin to think you really will pass out until--
"Fuck, ________. Fuck, fuck, fuck--"
You feel a gush of warmth, and Draco's slender fingers digging into your skin. Then he tugs you against his chest and buries his face in your neck, rocking slowly back and forth as he rides out his orgasm.
*****************************************
It's a few moments before you realise Draco is speaking to you. You must have passed out after all- or maybe you just fell asleep.
He's leaning back against the pillows, and you're slumped forward on his chest, head tucked under his chin. You can feel one of his hands tangled in your hair, idly curling a strand around his finger, while the other rests on your lower back, on the outside of your robes.
"Did you hear me? You can talk now," he murmurs. "But so help me, if you're not satisfied--"
You glance up with a start as it all comes rushing back to you, and you frantically search his chest for spots of blood. What if he overexerted himself- reopened his wounds?
He doesn't seem to have, thank goodness- maybe he was actually being honest about his condition- but you're still not sure what to say. Are you satisfied?
Satisfied sexually? Oh, yes.
Satisfied that he's in good physical shape? Certainly.
But satisfied that he's okay mentally? You're not sure.
While he is acting more like himself right now, could all of his odd behaviour really be put down to exam stress? (And the stress of his father being in prison?)
When the silence has dragged on for some time, Draco tugs at your hair and asks, "What? Lost your voice?" Then, more seriously, "Was I your first?"
You nod, matter-of-factly, (you've snogged a few people in your year, but haven't gone much further, until tonight), and don't miss the self-satisfied little smirk that twitches the corner of Draco's mouth.
He slicks back his hair again, watching you, searching your gaze. The mask is back in place, his expression nigh inscrutable, but for just a moment, his eyes are tender.
Then he pats you on the back, urging you off of him.
"You should go," he mutters, jerking his head in the direction of the matron's office. "Just in case."
You nod, but don't move, still debating with yourself over what you want to say.
Draco is not pleased.
"Not satisfied, then?" he snaps. "That wasn't proof enough for you?" The hand still tangled in your hair tightens its grip, and you feel his hot breath fan over your face as he leans in, as if he's about to kiss you. Instead, he nudges your face aside with his cheek and hisses in your ear, "Then next time, I'll prove it to you in my bed- except you'll be the one lying down naked."
You shiver. "Draco..."
"Ah, she finally says something," he gloats, drawing back to smirk at you. "And wouldn't you know it, it's my name."
You hesitate, but finally decide not to push. Whatever's going on with him, maybe he'll talk about it when he's ready. After all, you've yet to talk about his father- and that could be all it is. It's certainly traumatic enough.
Instead, you ask, "Are we... together, now?"
Draco glances down at his bandaged left wrist, lying on the blankets between you, and your heart sinks a little when you notice his smile falter. "Is that what you want?"
You consider for a moment- just a moment- thinking back on the entire sum of your friendship; the summers spent together at Malfoy Manor, hanging out in his room; playing Truth or Dare and other silly games on the Hogwarts Express; the study dates after lessons around the end-of-year exams, quizzing each other on all you've learned; the teasing, the flirting, the pranking- the secret smiles...
You can't imagine yourself with anyone else.
"Yes," you say, hesitating for only a fraction of a second before placing your hands on his chest. "I mean... don't you... want to be with me?"
Draco lifts his chin, meeting your gaze, and you bite down on your lip, wishing you could read his expression. He's gotten better at hiding his emotions over the years- too good, you think.
He stares at you for what feels like an age before a soft smile steals over his lips. You think it looks a little sad, maybe even wistful- yet, strangely, you can feel his heart racing a mile a minute under your fingertips.
"Yes, I do. There's no one else," he replies, simply.
Then he takes a deep breath, steeling himself, and you suddenly get the feeling that he's vulnerable right now- and very, very scared.
"But let's keep it a secret- just for this year, till we get our N.E.W.T.s. If I get anything less than an E, and Father finds out I've been distracted..." He runs his hands teasingly up your thighs.
"Sure," you shrug, trying to ignore the unease clawing at your stomach. "As you've seen, I'm pretty good at keeping my mouth shut."
Draco chuckles at that, and his shoulders sag imperceptibly with relief.
You go to slide off his lap, but he grabs your robes, holding you in place. "Not so fast. How about a goodnight kiss?"
You're only too happy to oblige him.
You lean forward, and he meets you halfway, cupping your face between his hands, pale grey gaze flicking from your eyes to your lips and back again before he presses his mouth to yours.
The kiss is slow and deliberate, all lips and no tongue, and you get the feeling that Draco's trying to tell you something, without words- until abruptly he pulls away, leaving you wanting more.
His lips twitch in a knowing smirk at the needy look in your eyes, and you poke your tongue out at him before sliding off the bed.
While you straighten your robes, Draco again makes a show of getting comfy; stretching out on his back, rearranging his pillows and pulling the blankets up under his arms.
"Night," you whisper.
But as you turn to slip through the privacy screen, Draco delays you yet again. He grabs your fingers and laces them briefly through his own, giving them a squeeze. "Goodnight, ________."
He releases you after that- but his eyes follow you through the gap in the screen all the way to the door, and when you turn on the threshold to glance back at him, he winks at you and mouths, 'I'll dream of you tonight.'
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lefttomyownvices · 1 year
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snippet #19
At midnight, Villain was dragged bloodied and bruised into Hero's study and pushed on their knees in front of their desk. A deep gash seeped on their cheek as their hands were tied back, secured into handcuffs.
It was a marvel, really, how easily they'd been plucked from the gates. Almost as if they had willingly surrendered.
"Leave us," Hero told their men, who left with smiles glowing on their faces at the job well done.
The door clicked shut.
That left Hero sitting on their leather swiveling chair, legs propped on the table in front of them and the forgotten book on battle strategy still open in their lap; and Villain, kneeling. Silent.
For a moment they stared at each other, and in that time another rich bead of blood pursed out from Villain's cheek, rolling down to their throat like something from slow-motion. It had a cartoonish, unreal quality to it.
Then, finally, Hero spoke.
"I dreaded it might be you the moment that the alarms went off," they said tiredly. "Snooping around when you knew full well that I've doubled, tripled my guards since you last came here."
"How truly ignorant of me," replied Villain smoothly. "However could I make this kind of a blatant mistake?"
"All I'm saying is that this was the sorriest attempt at a break-in I've ever seen." Hero's throat bobbed. Their voice came out hoarse, as if it had gone long unused; uncharacteristic for them, since they loved being the center of attention in everything, every conversation, every party, every hurried bedroom scene.
Villain was acting out of character, too. When they made no move to rise up from the position that they must have found humiliating—cowering nearly a meter below the other's mahogany desk—Hero's concern wove into a dark stone at the pit of their stomach.
When they spoke again, their voice had crept higher.
"Why did you come?"
"I heard you have a new enemy," Villain said. "And that you're losing battle after battle after battle. And I suppose I wanted to come watch your downfall with my own eyes. You're certainly not disappointing me, since you look like you just crawled out of the gutters."
Hero let out a humorless huff and pinched the bridge of their nose. The shadows under their once-bright eyes were as dark as Villain's flowering bruises. "Haven't been sleeping, I guess."
"Neither have I."
There was a pause, and Villain averted their eyes. The reply had simply slipped out. They were steadily being alluded into the old sense of comfort and safety that Hero's presence had once meant to them. Sunlight on bare skin. Lazy Saturday mornings, strawberry kisses.
Well. Villain wouldn't be leaving this room alive anyway.
"Would you like to elaborate on my losing streak?" Hero said. "If you were my advisor, I'd tell you to shut up, but I'm in the mood to hear some insults coming out of your pretty mouth. And I could also use some helpful suggestions."
Villain's brow shot up. "So it's that bad?"
"Maybe."
"I bet you miss the time I was your greatest threat," they said, almost gently. "Now you can crush me with the flick of a finger. And your enemies can crush you." They cleared their throat. "What I see as your biggest problem is your affection to your troops. Those incompetent little puppies of yours."
At that, Hero's expression hardened a notch, and they rose up from their seat, setting the book on top of a mess of vivid-red files. "They're not—"
"Yes, they are. And they're going to get you killed, mark my words."
Villain tilted their head as Hero strode in front of them, then crouched down, as if preparing to speak to a small child. With a strange rush of amusement, Villain noticed the other's feet were bare. The few blotches of skin not covered in ashy dirt were riddled in scars, and there was a new burn mark, too, just on the inside of their heel.
"Would it kill you to wear socks?" said Villain, nodding to the feet.
They meant to elaborate on the question, but then a cough tightened in their chest, and they spat a glob of something dark next to Hero, mindless of the expensive, patterned rug.
Let them clean it up along with my body, they thought mildly.
"It's better for your feet, actually," Hero said. "To not wear shoes at all."
"So you're still into local trends. What if you step into something sharp and it cuts you?"
"Are you in pain?"
"What?"
Hero hesitantly placed their hand on the other's shoulder, thumb sliding easily to the cavern at the end of their collarbone. So many times they'd trailed it in bed, lazily, smelling the lemon perfume on Villain's curly hair. Darling, they'd called them, sunshine.
Now their confused tone stung their eyes.
They pulled Villain into a half-hearted hug, their chin jutting against their neck. Villain inhaled sharply, but let them do it, angling their upper body to lean in closer.
"You look like shit too," Hero mumbled. "I'm sorry they roughed you up so bad. But it's kind of your fault for wandering here."
"Yes," Villain replied simply.
They both smelled of blood and cologne. Hero's hand slipped down, glided down the other's frail shoulder blades to the small of their back, finally finding the cuffs. But as they moved to click in the right code and unlock them, Villain withdrew.
"Leave them," they said. "It doesn't matter."
"There's electricity running through them."
Villain hesitated. "But you're not going to switch it on?"
"Of course not."
"Then it doesn't matter."
"Oh, god."
As Hero sat on the rug in front of them, Villain's eyes had regained some light, like a spark had been lit somewhere deep inside. It was not hope that stirred within them, but a certain, dark-flavored contentment; a ghost of the comfort they'd once felt with their lover. After all, it did seem that Hero no longer harbored that explosive hate. That was calming to know.
"You can dispose of me as you see fit," Villain said. "I trust you not to desecrate the body."
Hero snorted, though it sounded more like a sob. "You shouldn't have turned yourself in. This is so stupid."
"Is it?" Villain's tone was gentle. "Men have been hunting me down each hour of each day for the past five years since I left you. I moved to Finland and they searched for me in the woods. I fled to Moldova, and they nearly shot me to shreds in a public bathroom. Does this sound like a glorious life to you?"
"But you escaped every time."
"Barely," Villain replied. "And only because they still harbored fear for me, which no one seems to do anymore. Even you."
Hero glanced up.
When they rose back to their feet, Villain tried to get up for the first time, but the bruises on their ribs twinged so hard they instead sank deeper to their knees, letting out a barest groan.
Hero hurried back to the desk. There was a faint clatter. When they returned, bare feet thudding softly against the floor, Villain expected to have a knife dragged across their throat, or in the very least, be secured to some previously hidden hook in the ceiling to await a more proper time of execution.
Instead Hero pressed a round-edged coffee cup to their lips.
Villain stared at them, unimpressed, refusing to swallow.
Hero sighed.
"Yes, yes, you're very intimidating. But you need to drink something. I would've offered you water but I would have to make another trip to the kitchen for that, and I'm not leaving you alone here so—drink."
"If it's poisoned, dear, please have the audacity to tell me beforehand," said Villain tiredly.
Hero scrunched up their nose. "Well, it may taste like arsenic but it hardly is. Although I've put in vodka."
"You drink now?"
"No. A little. Yes."
Villain rolled their eyes, but then swallowed a mouthful of the bitter liquid. It stung all the way down their throat.
"More," said Hero.
"Why are you so intent on force-feeding me your evening coffee?"
Hero wordlessly nudged the cup against the other's teeth, and Villain drank again, this time swallowing for a longer time, because a lump was growing in their throat, too, and they'd be damned if they started to weep just because an old lover was being gentle out of some unexplainable guilt.
When Villain had finished, Hero set the cup down on the floor with a clink.
Another restless pause.
"Remember your dream?" said Villain suddenly. "It was a princess. You told me you wanted to be a princess."
Hero snorted. "Yeah."
"For what it's worth, I would've come to your royal wedding."
"It was just a joke," Hero said, trailing the edge of the now-empty cup with their finger. (Villain made note that the silver ring still circled their index finger, the ring shaped like a mythological snake.) "A stupid thing, really. It's weird we both remember it."
"And what was your real dream? Surely not this?"
"In the front lines of a war?" Hero's lip tugged down. A bird cried out somewhere in the night. "No," they said, "never. I just wanted to make you laugh."
It took a while for the words to register, and when they did, they settled like a weigh over Villain's heart.
They were silent.
Hero raised their hand carefully. Villain tensed, waiting for the glimmer of a knife in the dim; brief, scalding pain.
It would be okay.
But Hero's hand pressed on their cheek, and it didn't hurt. They let Villain rest their head there for a moment, then let go, rising back up to their feet.
"Well then," they said.
Villain's skin tingled pleasantly where Hero had touched them.
"Well what?" they said.
"Well then," Hero repeated, stronger now, more assured; their posture was changing, their spine straightening. "Now we need to get you sad motherfucker out of here in one piece."
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raincoffeeandfandoms · 2 months
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Heart vs. Mind (Alfie Solomons x fem!oc)
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Summary: Alfie hasn't seen his friend Andrei in years and when he sees him again, it happens that his friend is dancing with Alfie's wife. His Rosie. Usually, she is ready to annihilate any man near her but not this time. Even if his heart is telling him that neither of them could betray him, his mind is telling him another story.
Warnings: Jealous Alfie. He's a bit a dick but apologies. Fluff ending. Mentions of sex.
Words: 3K. || James Norton as Andrei Bolkonsky in War & Peace (2016) decided to steal my braincells and that's why I wrote this.
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1921.
It was a costume party with an early 19th century theme. Alfie wouldn't have been there if his friend, Andrei, whom he hadn't seen since the war ended, hadn't invited him and his wife, Rose. And none of the feelings that clouded his mind now, would have happened if Andrei hadn't reappeared and crossed paths with Rose that Monday morning when he went to the place where she worked.
.
"I'm looking for a friend of mine," Andrei had told Rose, still not knowing who she was.
"All the men who come here say the same thing."
And it was true. At the institution Rose had founded to protect women and their children fleeing an abusive home, it was not uncommon for the men who had caused such traumas to now return looking for their wives with promises of change and eternal love. They never followed through and those women who agreed to return home to their husbands would sooner or later return to the institution with new scars and the same traumas. Others did not return, but could be found in the cemetery.
Rose looked at the newcomer. Dressed elegantly, his social status could be appreciated and his face accompanied such elegance. Dark-haired and light-eyed in another context he might even have been part of the nobility, but in 1920 he was just a wealthy man. Still, there was something in the look of him that other men who appeared there did not have (unless they were doctors or priests) and that was kindness.
"I'm sorry not let you in, Mr…"
"Andrei Bolkonsky."
"Mr. Bolkonsky, but the rules are clear. I can still have your friend called if you tell me her name. One of my women, you can go get her and tell her if she wants to meet you or not."
"I have no problem with that. Her name is Beatrice Samuels. She used to be a neighbor of mine, but because of work I had to go away and when I came back I found out that she was no longer living with her husband. Mr. Samuels was always a difficult man. But I have news of her son who lives in Germany and I would like to give her that news personally."
"I wouldn't call someone who broke the arm of the woman he swore to love and protect 'difficult'. There's another name for that kind of… person. Okay. I'll have Mrs. Samuels call, just wait there, yes?"
Andrei agreed and sat down in one of the green velvet armchairs by the door. From there he saw a tall blonde woman approach the smaller one who had waited on him. The latter handed the blonde a piece of paper.
"Thank you, Eunice."
"You're welcome, Mrs. Solomons."
Andrei frowned and approached again. "Excuse me. I couldn't help but overhear your last name. Solomons? Something to do with Alfie Solomons? Captain of Battalion 904 during the war?"
"Alfie is my husband. Do you know him?" Rose looked at him intrigued.
"Mrs. Solomons, nice to meet you, at last. Yes, Alfie and I fought together. I was in command of another battalion, but it was often we saw each other. For the first two years, our men fought in the same French trench. Maybe we would have gone on to the end if a wound hadn't knocked me out. How is he?"
"I'm sorry to hear that, Mr. Bolkonsky. Alfie is well, as much as he is. Moody, vulgar and angry as usual, though not with me, so I well know those are signs that he is happy. I'm sorry I don't hear from you, not because Alfie is impolite, simply because he doesn't talk about what happened in France."
"I don't blame him. Sometimes it's better to forget. I'd like to see him, if he wants to…" it wasn't often that Rose smiled in the presence of another man, but the warmth he exuded made it impossible for her to resist the temptation. There is always an exception that breaks every rule and in this case it was Andrei Bolkonsky who had nothing to do with the violent hypocrites Rose was used to seeing on a daily basis.
She wasn't sure about giving him the location of the distillery, so instead she gave him their home address knowing that for tea time, Alfie was always used to being there.
Thus it was that the two war buddies turned friends, were reunited.
As she rested in her bedroom she could hear her husband's laughter from the main room of the house and her friend's soft voice. She wished all the men around Alfie were like Andrei, but that was not the case. It had been many years since she had gotten the idea that Shelby or Sabini and the like was the kind of person he frequented.
And as far as Alfie was concerned, he had actually been glad to be reunited with Andrei. He was, as far as Alfie knew, the only living friend left that he had met in France. The rest, if he hadn't died on the battlefield, had ended their lives on their return to London.
"It's the party of a relative of mine," he had said "I'm sure you and your wife might enjoy it."
"Rosie likes that," Alfie admitted "it's been a long time since I've taken her anywhere and it might be a good opportunity."
"I'll give your names to my cousin, then. You're a lucky man, Alfie, many others would kill to have a relationship like yours with her."
"It's because of her. I'm sorry about what happened with your wife."
"It's a long time ago now, Alfie. But thank you."
Andrei barely smiled remembering his young wife and how the Spanish flu had decided to make her one of its victims.
"You can always start again."
.
"You can always start again." Those words kept repeating in Alfie's head like a mantra that instead of healing, was rotting his thoughts. Andrei had asked permission for him to dance with Rose and Alfie had found no argument to refuse that even if he had wanted to shout no.
Since Andrei had reappeared, Rose had been delighted to have something nice to say about a friend of his. And apparently everything he did was to be admired. Alfie hadn't said so, but that had been the start of it.
From the chair where he was sitting, he could see Andrei's hand gently squeeze her lower back.
Aesthetically they were perfect. He dressed as if he were a prince and she his princess. Alfie could see how Andrei carried an elegance that he lacked. That elegance was born with, regardless of social class and Alfie knew that. But that was not what bothered Alfie, he would never be bothered by something so trivial.
He didn't quite know for sure what it was, but he saw Andrei as a threat and that had never happened before. He never cared that men wanted to get close to Rose because inevitably she always pushed them away. Each and every one of them. But for the first time Alfie was watching her happily accept company other than his own.
And it was a feeling he didn't like at all.
Andrei was indeed the kind of man one would expect to see at her side, he thought. And the fact that Rose, his Rosie, was smiling at him and looking him in the eye only added to that sense of betrayal.
"If she could, she'd go with him." His mind told him as he watched Andrei spin her around on the dance floor.
If a look could kill, then Alfie's would have wiped out everyone present there. He was furious.
Jealous.
And he could no longer hide it.
For her it was just a dance with the company of a nice man. For Andrei it was a way to socialize with other people again after being widowed. For Alfie it was hell.
Alfie barely said goodbye to Andrei as he left and the drive back to the Solomons' house, was fraught with tension inside the car driven by the chauffeur they both had.
"Is something wrong, Al?"
"No."
Inside the car was not a good place to talk because they would end up arguing that night and Rose knew it, so for the moment she kept quiet. She hated it when that happened because it was so infrequent that she could keep track of the times it happened using one of her hands, but apparently that was going to happen again that night.
"You had fun tonight," Alfie spat once they both entered the house and went upstairs to the bedroom.
"Yeah and so would you have too if you hadn't been sitting in the corner like you'd rather be dead than be there. What the hell is the matter with you?"
"I'd have had more fun if I hadn't seen ya makin' fuckin' googly eyes at Andrei, maybe."
Rose who was trying to take off one of his shoes stops to look at him. What she just heard had to be a mistake "Excuse me?"
Alfie was wearing that angry expression that made more than one recoil, but not her. The fact that Alfie was suggesting that in other circumstances would have made her laugh, but at the moment she was just as angry as he was. Only she had valid reasons to be.
"If I had to bet," Alfie went on, "I'd swear that if Evert had been like Andrei ya probably would've loved to marry him."
"Is that what you think?"
"The way you looked thrilled to be there, yeah."
"What the fuck is wrong with you, Alfie? How many years have we been together? Since we were fourteen! That's almost twenty years. Ten of which, we've been married. And you know why I don't count as separate the years I had to force myself into a marriage I never wanted? Because it never existed for me. Because every day I pretend it never happened. And now you're telling me that if Lawrence Evert had been Andrei, I would have been happy? Are you listening to yourself?"
Alfie, without changing his attitude, remained silent.
"In what world would I have been happy without you? You fucking idiot! You're just jealous because for the first time in thirty-three years I've been alive another man other than you was nice to me? Let me tell you something, if Andrei had been Evert he would never have forced a teenage girl to marry him! He would never have been an accomplice of his mother in forcing such a marriage! He would never have molested a teenage girl either!" Rose walked over to him and looked him firmly in the eye. "Shouldn't you be glad that I allowed another man, other than you, to be kind to me? That I didn't use the same armor I use every day to take care of myself? Don't you think that's fucking progress? Before you go sleep in another bed, because you're not sleeping with me, Alfie, I want to tell you something else. Anyone would say jealousy is cute 'aww, he's jealous' but in your case it isn't. Jealousy doesn't suit you. You behaved just like every other man I see every fucking day. You are seeing me as an extension of your property and I want you to know that I don't like it one bit. Don't put your masculine insecurities on my actions, because I did nothing! Take a bath, get some sleep and when you get back to yourself, then maybe I want to talk to you. Until that happens, good night."
Neither he nor she could sleep that night and when he went down for breakfast the next day, she was no longer there.
.
"It wasn't hard to find your place of work if you know where to ask. A distillery…" said Andrei's voice that morning, Alfie looked at him surprised to see him there. "I'm not one to judge either. May I sit down?"
Alfie closed the account book on his desk and gestured to the chair across from him.
"You don't look well," Andrei mentioned.
"I didn't sleep at all."
Andrei smiled slightly. "I can imagine why," he looked down for a moment before raising his head again "I asked you last night if you minded if I danced with her and you said no problem. But I could see right away that there was all the problems. You're my friend, Alfie. You haven't considered for a moment that I might be interested in her as something more than your wife and, perhaps, as a friend, have you?"
"I don't know what came over me last night. Suddenly ya were the biggest fuckin' threat to appear in my marriage…not even in my fuckin' marriage…in all the life I've known Rosie."
"Look at me, Alfie. I can't be a threat to anyone. Least of all to your marriage, considering that woman loves you. All she ever said to me while I was dancing with her was nice things about you. And I couldn't betray you, not to mention I'm still grieving."
Alfie knew that, always knew that. There was no way either his friend or his wife, would do anything against him. But the night before that voice in his head was more powerful than Alfie himself. The worst thing was that he had hurt Rose, when that was the last thing he would ever want to do.
.
"What do you want?"
His wife was in the house when he arrived. He heard her in the kitchen preparing tea and went over to where she was. From behind, he rested his chin on her shoulder as he placed a bouquet of flowers in front of her.
"May you forgive me?"
"Really? And why?" Rose felt his arms around her waist as she smelled the flowers.
"Because I was an idiot," Alfie hid his head in her neck.
"And a big one. You said things I didn't think if you could even come up with, Alfie."
"I know. I have no reason to say what I said or what I thought. But I can make it up to you. Let's go to Margate, this very night. We can come back in the morning, if you can't give up your work for a day. I want to do something nice for you… or you can throw me in the sea, whichever you prefer."
"I don't want to go to the beach, Alfie. It's on the other side of England, it's far away and I'm tired and I'm still upset. Whatever you want to say you can say it here."
"It's not what I want to say, it's what I want to do. There are things we can't do in London but we can do there. Like walking along the seashore… or having sex on the beach."
Contrary to how she felt she couldn't suppress a smile. Putting aside the tea she wanted to make, she turned in on herself to look at him, "sex on the beach…that's what you want over there for. I really admire that you're convinced that's going to happen. Whether it's in Margate or in our bedroom."
"If I humiliate myself enough, you might agree," Alfie stroked her cheek with a finger.
"I don't need you to humiliate yourself, I need you to never behave like an idiot again. May you never again think that dancing once with a nice man, means being unfaithful. Because that's basically what you implied to me last night and I think you know how I feel about that. I didn't think you would doubt the love I feel for you like that."
"I never doubted your love… I doubted myself and as someone worthy of that love. But I found no other way to express myself. Let's be honest, Andrei is what you call the perfect man. He's honest, handsome and a good man in general, I'm not."
"Lucky for you, I always liked the bad boy. But there's a difference between being a bad boy and a jerk. And I hope I never see that Alfie in front of me again."
"No. I don't like being like that either, but ya don't know what jealousy does…"
"You think so? Do you really think that? That I never felt threatened by the presence of another person in your life? The difference is that I pushed those thoughts out of my head and never told you because, in the end, I know it's only the work of my imagination."
"Sweetheart, what are you talking about? Who? I'm not surrounded by beautiful women, it's the same old lads. Some of them haven't taken a shower in two months."
"I don't need you to be surrounded by beautiful women. It doesn't matter who. It matters that at the end of the day, I know my thoughts don't reflect reality. Even if that person is better than me."
Alfie put a hand on her waist and pulled her to him as he kissed her. Her arms ended around his shoulders and her hands caressed his hair. It was she who increased the intensity of the kiss and he wasted no time in getting her legs around his hips. He carried her to the bed and lay down on top of her. It didn't take long for the clothes to end up on the floor.
The good thing about misunderstandings was reconciliations and this was the case. All the frustrations of the previous day, Alfie channeled into each thrust. And judging by her moans, that was exactly what she needed to get past that stupid jealousy of his. Although Alfie being angry, arouse a new Alfie when they had sex like now and that was something she would never complain about.
"And you wanted to go to Margate, three hours from here, when we have the bed twenty seconds from the kitchen," Rose smiled at him, when they finished, before kissing his chest exactly where he had a rose tattoo.
"I want to go, but maybe it's true that it wasn't the time today. Did you forgive me?"
"Yes. I hate being mad at you."
Alfie slid his hand down her back until he reached her bottom. "Good thing, because I don't intend to let you go now not until you answer me. Mrs. Solomons, who makes you jealous? I don't have much choice in my life and if it's who I think it is…then it's fucking ridiculous."
"I told you, Alfie, it doesn't matter who it is or was! I've got things straight in my life and…"
"It's Tommy," he interrupted. "You're fucking jealous of Thomas Shelby. Tommy is the only one who can make you feel jealous. Because he's the only one who has brain cells around me. I don't need you to confirm this, I just know."
Rose opened her mouth and then closed it. Damn Alfie and his intuition. "It was only once. You kept talking about him and suddenly you said something about his blue eyes and my thought was 'why don't you just marry him.' Later, I realized what I thought and how I wasn't right. It was a stupid thought."
"With Tommy…" Alfie felt like laughing, but instead he hugged her tighter "I need to eat something first. But after that, I can show you again why I married you. You have something Thomas is never going to have."
"What thing? A pussy?"
"That, too... and my heart."
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wh0refornikolailantsov · 10 months
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Tonight, Forever, Then, Here And Now - Nikolai Lantsov
Summary: Nikolai Lantsov x Reader circa King Of Scars, at a party, pretending their feelings for each other can be ignored.
Content Warnings: Not Beta/Proof Read.
So like, I stopped writing fanfic content and imagines and stuff a few years back because Wattpad wasn't serving me well and Quotev had drained my morale. The last two years I've been posting fanfic on A03, and that's really just been for me and bestie, and this account was really just so I could post Tolya content for bestie. But I'm like very glad you are enjoying my nonsense the same was she does, and I shall continue to take requests and post my random bs because who knew there was such an audience for it xx
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Genya smiles looking you up and down. "You clean up nice," Genya says. You give her a look, and she pretends not to see it. "Please try to look like you're happy to be here."
"I did not ask to be here," you remind her. She gently leans closer, bringing her drink to her lips, to try and hide her whispers.
"We both know there is at least one reason you would like to be here," she whispers.
"Don't," you warn her.
"I haven't seen him yet," she continues, "but from what Zoya said-,"
"I do not want to know what Zoya said about Nikolai," you say a little too quickly. Genya smiles, that knowing smile. "I will tell David that you don't like the new hinges, that you preferred the other ones despite the fact they were less functional, because they were prettier."
"No, you wouldn't," Genya says, but she thinks about it. "Oh you might."
"Yes," you tell her, "I might."
You love Genya, she keeps you sane during such fancy and often long functions, but today she wants to talk about Nikolai, and you cannot talk about Nikolai. You're not sure your heart can take it. You've never been able to hide your feelings for him, not from her at least. But today your feelings feel like they could boil over.
"I hoped you'd look my way eventually," comes a voice you don't know. You realise that in your absentmindedness you must have been looking at someone, and rather than admit you were somewhere else entirely, thinking about Nikolai, you try to conjure a smile.
"Have we met?" You ask, you hate small talk, especially with men like these, the type that will ask you to dance. You really do not feel like dancing.
"May I have this dance," you go to say no, but you realise when the confusion crosses the strangers face it isn't he who asked. You play the question back in your mind, and you know the voice, you'd know it anywhere, you'd know it in a crowded room, you'd know it tired, to quiet or pretending to be someone else, and you know it now.
"Your Highness," you give a curtsey, it's a little joke that no one but Nikolai and Genya seem to understand. Nikolai tries to make his smile look more humble, but the smugness lingers. He offers you his hand.
"Shall we?" he asks. You stare at him, like waiting would make it make more sense. He takes your hand with a smile and throws the stranger a gentle shrug. "I have a tendency to make them short of words." You follow him as he pulls you along, trying to ignore the smirk Genya has. "Dance with me."
"We shouldn't be seen together," is the first sentence you manage to put together. Nikolai just gives an indignant sigh.
"Just, take my arm, and don't look so stiff," he says, pulling you in. You let him, having him hold you close takes away some of the attention from the fact you do not wish to be dancing, for understandable reasons. You don't even want to be here at all.
"I should warn you that I am a terrible dancer," you tell him. He chuckles and you can feel his breath against your skin, and you try not to let your thoughts linger on it.
"It's okay love, no one's going to be watching you," he teases.
"By all means, don't waste your pleasantries on me," you respond. He places a hand on your hip and you try not to jolt from the shock. You'd intended on avoiding him, you'd hoped you could spend the whole night, not having to share a word with him, and now his hands are against you and it's like he has filled up all your senses.
"My eyes are up here," Nikolai whispers, bringing himself close to your ear. You step on his foot and he bites his tongue pretending to not notice. "Ouch," he whispers. "Put your hand on my-,"
"No," you say quickly.
"Can you at least pretend you like spending time with me?" he asks.
"I like spending time with you," you say, looking up to meet his gaze. "But I hate parties, I hate... all of this and people are looking at me, I don't want them looking at me, and we know why they're looking at me, because I am dancing with you. Something else I did not intend to do."
You see one of the court members leaning into whisper to someone you don't recognise and you fight off the groan. Nikolai follows your gaze. "Ah, the rumour mill's already started," he observes.
"Sound less pleased with yourself," you tell him. His grin turns mischievous, and he looks more like the Nikolai you know, underneath all the royal attire and façade. You wish you could smile and just be happy in his company, you wish it was that easy. But it's anything from that easy, and as each day passes it gets more and more complicated. "I've heard the rumours about you."
"Who hasn't?" he asks, tone still filled with good-humour, in spite of how quickly he could have misinterpreted that comment.
"I mean... the other rumours, about you and Zoya," you're teasing him and he knows it.
"Yes, that's why she is so set on finding me a wife," he lets slip the tiredness in his tone.
"Oh, that's why you're insisting on dancing with me," you say, letting him pull you closer. "Not because you couldn't find a date in time."
"You think I couldn't find a date in time?" he asks, mock offended.
"No, I know you could have dates lined up out the door," you say, "so it made me wonder, why you wanted to bother me."
"I'm bothering you, am I?"
"Shut up Nikolai," you look away trying to stop yourself from blushing. He always acts like this, and you always react like this, you should know better.
"I wasn't expecting to see you here," he admits. It sounds like a confession, but you've got not a single clue what he is confessing to.
"You weren't supposed to find me here," you admit, equally honest, equally confessional, but at least you know what you're confessing to, even if he doesn't. You feel your throat drying up as Nikolai pulls you in even closer. "Strong grip," you whisper. He laughs and you can feel the breath moving in his chest as he does. "Anyway, how is the whole wife thing going?"
"Oh please, I had hoped I would be free of that, at least with you," he says.
"Why would I free you from conversing clearly the most important decision you're yet to make as royalty and ruler?" you tease.
"I knew you'd turn on me one day," he whispers, "but this betrayal, this stings."
"Well, Your Majesty, I am just concerned for the royal line," you say, dipping your head in a subtle bow.
"Mind if I cut in?" Zoya asks, approaching the two of you.
"Yes," Nikolai groans but keeps a smile on his face.
"A word," Zoya says, eyeing you.
"When I have a moment?" you ask.
"After your dance?" Nikolai inquires.
"I am not cutting in for you," Zoya tells Nikolai directly, "and no," she looks to you, "not when you have a moment, now."
Zoya pulls you aside. "Now I don't know what I've done to incur the wrath of General Nazyalensky, but I assume I am about to find out," You say, not liking quite how hard the grip on your arm is.
"He needs to find a wife," Zoya states flatly.
"I know," you reply.
"He will not find a wife, with you around taking up his time," Zoya points out. If Zoya were someone else, you'd think this was coming from a place of jealousy, possessiveness, or her own interest in Nikolai. But anyone who knows Zoya enough, knows her one true loyalty, the thing she loves above all else, is Ravka. That is where her intentions lie. She wants what is best for her country, it isn't personal and you know it.
"He sought me out," you tell Zoya.
"And he will do that," she tells you, "over and over, and it gets him no where, he will chase you and it will mean nothing except act as a distraction from what he must do."
"Please, Sobachka or not, Nikolai isn't some... love sick puppy, he is a romantic, and these proposed arrangements do not interest him, but even if there was a deeper reason for that, it would not be me," you state.
Zoya's laugh is tired, and in its own way, cruel. "You exhaust me," Zoya admits. Zoya was all kinds of beautiful, and you know her to be beautiful even in her cruelty, in her viciousness. Zoya was so beautiful in her anger, even in her war, that even as the Storm Witch her beauty is what people remember most about her. You assumed she looked right through you, but she was staring at you now, right at you. And that was the most terrifying. "I suggest, you put aside your naivety and take a walk. Let me do what is necessary, what is best."
"For Ravka?" You ask, tone bleak.
"And for Nikolai," she states, "your own feelings aside, that is what you want, isn't it?"
"You know nothing of my feelings Zoya," you say, more venomous than you'd originally planned.
"I think it is you that knows nothing of your feelings," Zoya says, "now you need some air, don't you?"
"I need some air?" you ask. Zoya looks to the archway leading out of the festivities and into the gardens.
"You need some air," Zoya says again, "or do I need to physically remind you."
Zoya would not use her small science here, not like this, but the threat was filled with a level of sincerity. "I need some air," you reply and take your leave. 'What I really need is a drink,' you think to yourself as you make it past most of the crowd.
"Quick, while no one is looking," comes Nikolai's voice as he pulls you into the shadows.
"What... are you doing?" you ask, biting back any sounds of shock.
"You help me, I help you, isn't this how this goes?" he is being himself again, that Nikolai you know so well, all mischief and planning. You knew Nikolai could escape almost any situation if he wanted to, and if he put his mind to it. Clever as a fox. Sly like one too, you'd often thought.
"I need some air," you say, trying your best to oblige Zoya and her better intentions.
"Mind joining me for a walk in the gardens?" Nikolai asks.
"Would I mind you joining me," you correct him. He smirks.
"You wouldn't mind," he places an arm around you, resting a hand on the lower of your back, "I am such a delight to be around."
He is uncharacteristically quiet as you walk down the path and around the garden. "I am sorry for Zoya," he says finally.
"It's futile to apologise over her," you say, "no one could control her if they tried."
"Perhaps not, but... I do not like the way she talks to you," he says.
"She talks to everyone that way."
"But she shouldn't talk to you like that," he says. You want to ask about why you deserve special treatment, about why he is seeking you out knowing there are things he needs to be doing. But something else catches your thoughts before you can ask either of those questions.
"Were you eavesdropping?" you ask.
"Can royalty really eavesdrop?" he asks, trying to pull that charm he has to cover his tracks.
"Nikolai," you say, sighing.
"Call me Kolya," he says, "like you used to."
You think your heart might just stop in your chest. "I... there is a lot of things I used to say, that it's best if I don't say anymore," you manage, looking up at the sky instead of at him. It's cloudy and dark, the stars barely managing to shine through all the fog.
"Why not?" he asks, genuine, needing to know.
"Because things can't be how they were Nikolai, not anymore, not now," you say, "and you know that better than I do."
"I don't believe that," he says, leaning on the wall. You look at his waistcoat, wondering how it would look if he were to return to the party with the dirt of the garden on his good clothes.
"You need to," you say, stepping to stand beside him, resting your arms on the wall, hands just out of subtle reach of his. He would have to reach for you, intentionally, knowingly, noticeably to take your hand in his. Part of you wants him to, part of you knows he really shouldn't.
"You're really trying to sound convincing aren't you?" he asks.
"I am allowed my fantasies, you cannot afford them," you admit. He smiles, but you can feel the sadness thinly veiled by the smugness.
"So you have fantasies about me?" He cocks his head to give you a look.
"You shouldn't keep them waiting," you say, not giving in to him, as much as you want to.
"I'm royalty, I never keep anyone waiting, they're just too eager," he says. He moves his hand over, just a small amount, considering it as he edges across the stone of the wall. You remind yourself not to hold your breath.
"Nikolai..." you whisper. "You can't do this." You want to tell him that it is not fair, to have loved him all this time, and always known he could never be yours. With him this close the idea that he could, even for a moment is filling your brain with desires and thoughts you've tried hard to bury.
"But what if we did anyway," he asks. "Tell me like I am not what I am, but just who I am, forget the titles and the obligations. If it was not about the rules and Zoya and the parade of princesses and diplomats that I am expected to smile at and charm. If it was just you and I, tell me like it was that."
"Why?" you ask. "What is the point?"
"So I know," he says, "I need to know if I am truly going mad, or if maybe, my dashing charms have won over even you."
"My feelings for you have nothing to do with your charms Nikolai," you smile to yourself, "I fell for you long before you became so boyishly handsome."
"And my heart belonged to you long before I ever thought I could be king," he admits.
"But you did get handsome, and you are King," you say.
"What if," he takes your hand now and the warmth of his hand engulfing yours makes your breath hitch, "we just didn't care about it. What if I told Zoya that she needn't worry with her matchmaking because there is no one I would be willing to rule with that isn't you?"
"I'd say you're a fool, and that only Kings in bed time stories marry for love," you say.
"And I would remind you once said every prince in every fairy tale made you think of me."
"Saints I really used to say things didn't I?"
"I always loved that about you."
"You still say things."
"Say you'll have me," he says, "if you will have me, I will sort the rest."
"And have to dance with you in front of people, I don't think I could do that, you misstep," you tease.
"You stepped on my foot," he chuckles. You look at him, and those eyes are staring right back at you, into you, like he could see exactly who you are at a glance, like he has always known. Like every breath, ever step, has always been leading here, to this moment. "You're leaving me without an answer."
"Nikolai," you whisper, "you're not supposed to make this choice."
"But I want to make it anyway," he says, "I am King, no one will argue with me."
"Zoya will," you say as his hand brushes your cheek.
"Let her try," he says. "So... is that a yes? All I ask is that you say yes if you want to, not because you should or shouldn't but because you want to, and you speak to me as you always have, and call me like you once did."
"Kolya," you whisper, and the softness in your voice is answer enough, but you tell him anyway, "yes."
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a-gal-with-taste · 2 years
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Busy (NSFW)
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Summary: Lording over an entire underground nation can be time-consuming - you know this.
Still, you hope that Silco has enough free-time on his plate, to enjoy a little surprise you have in store.
Warnings: NSFW|MDNI. Suggested boss/employee relationship, established-relationship, nudity, wearing-nothing-under-coat, misunderstandings, groping/fondling, light fingering, Sinday is back!
Climbing up the stairs was a risk. Calculated, but you still tugged the thick fur coat tighter around you, forcing it to hug your body... and you took the last few steps double-at-a-time, just in case.
Thankfully, there were no hoots, or low whistles from any potential up-lookers on busy dancefloor below, and you were grateful.
Because there was only one reaction you wanted, and nerves faded as the grin spread across your face, when you thought of the expression he would have when he realized you came in a coat and heels...
And only, a coat and heels.
Knocking wasn't really required anymore, not for you. Though, you still tilted your ear close to the door to listen for any undesired second-party. Sevika would be a mortifying possibility, since she could see through any attempt at a poker-face, and you'd turn right back around if you heard Jinx spending time with her father.
Cold or not, you'd march straight back home if either were the case.
Only the sounds of pen scratching on paper in a curt, sharp pace was heard. And after letting out a small, sharp breath to calm any remaining nerves at what could be one of your more embarrassing ideas, you opened the door, walked in, and-
"I'm busy."
The door closed behind you, and you blinked at the sound, and at Silco. Who didn't even look up... who wasn't even wearing makeup.
You'd seen Silco without it before, but the sight still halted you more than his sharp two-word greeting did. The scars, dark and striking in the pale evening-lighting gave his face a more severe and yet vulnerable look - this wasn't a sight permitted for many, and it stunned you that he allowed you to see this.
But then his red and teal gaze snapped up to glare, and fix you with a look you imagined everyone had been victim to. "I'm busy," He said, low and stressing the word in a way that made you shiver - even though it was warmer than it was outside.
"I heard you," You confirmed, reaching back to silently flicked the lock to avoid visitors, before your heels clicked on the wooden floor as you stepped forward towards him. A small smile crossed your freshly-painted lips, and your fingers came up to brush the clasps of your coat as you stepped closer, "However... I thought that, perhaps, you wouldn't mind a break-"
"If I want something, it would be here when I require it," Silco says, voice frosty enough that you're chilled into standing in place, frozen. "I don't recall requesting your presence, nor do I require it... you may leave."
Silco always had a way with words - and you knew full-well that that 'may' was actually a 'will.'
"What happened?" You said, frowning as you stepped forward, not so much prowling seductively as it was to see what was the matter with the man. "Is there anything I can do-?"
"Yes, you can find the door," Silco snapped hotly, pen held tight between white-knuckled fingers. Your gaze darts from it, back to his gaze... one heartbeat. Then a second, third passes, before that burning iron in his gaze softened, more like hot-stones, but an improvement nonetheless.
"Is... is it the trades? Poor profits?"
"Worse - a buisness-meeting."
The pen makes an audible click when Silco sets it down, before he lets out a long-sigh as he reaches up, cradling his forehead with his fingers as a migraine announced it's arrival inside his head. "Short-notice, as well... if it wasn't something that could directly provide consequence to your other guesses, I'd be insulted it was even brought to my attention. Alas, it does require it."
"Oh," You breathed, trying not to feel disappointed... it was no secret the Eye not only watched all, but usually had hand in-all that occurred in Zaun. A full-schedule wasn't, shouldn't be much of a surprise...
Still, as you tugged the coat tight enough around you that it squeezed at the round of your bare hips, you really, really weren't looking forward to going back in the chilly night-air. "So... you really want me to go?"
The question, meant to be casual but coming out wary, caused the glowing-ember of an obsidian eye to flick between the gaps of fingers, looking at you. Again, there was a softening when he gazed as you - stone to a weaker-copper, perhaps. "Not my preference... not at all, but a necessity," Silco did sound apologetic, and firm in his more gentle dismissal, but you still felt a bit sluggish as you stepped back from the desk, dejected.
And then stepped to the side, walking around the desk towards him. There's a fiery-spark of irritation in both eyes at the clear disobedience, the green and the red, but only the green widens when your hand reached out, pressing and kneading at his shoulder gently.
Silco didn't so much soften as well as he melted at your touch, and it was only thanks to practice that you didn't immediately smile or chuckle at the sight of Silco, Eye and unofficial King of the Undercity, practically reduced to a puddle by a massaging of one shoulder - not even both.
"I hope it goes by quick, smoothly..."
"Doubtful... but your words and well-wishes are appreciated." So was your touch, you noted, as his remaining eye faltered shut and there was the faintest hum from his chest. It was a pity to have to pull away, but, slowly retracting and dragging your fingers, you made to move back... but out of habit or some touch-starved instinct, Silco's fingers snapped up to curl around your wrist.
More specifically, curling around the sleeve covering your wrist.
And that, combined with the step you had taken back and away from him, triggered a two-step chain-reaction that led to your completely bare shoulder bare to see. Which, honestly, wouldn't be so scandalous... except your face immediately heated up to the point of burning, and you scrambled to step back and fix your sleeve.
Obviously, this caught the Eye's attention.
"Is something the matter?" Silco say in an innocent tone that immediately put you on edge. "You look... ruffled." His index finger unfurled around your wrist, and shifted slightly in order to stroke the fur of your coat in emphasis, though his eyes never left yours.
"Just... it's chilly-" "I have a thicker coat you can borrow, then. Though, I imagined the one you wear now had it's uses."
Your breath, and whatever hope you had of replying, shudders in time with his fingers dragging in order to skim between the line of clothing and skin - his fingers scorched as much as your face burned, but his eyes were the worst of it. Impassive, carefully neutral, yet they were quickly melting you in place.
"Perhaps you should take this one off, dear," He mused quietly. You weren't surprise he had put two & two together, coming up with the fact that you weren't subtle, but it still sent an embarrassed flush to your already blushing-dark cheeks.
"I-i... I wouldn't want to bother, you seem busy-"
"I have time. Take it off."
Compliance, unfortunately, was a skill you possessed that Silco loved to use to the fullest extent. He didn't even have to use a commanding voice with the order - the man simply had to look at you, and say it so casually, that you didn't realize your hands were already pulling the fold of your coat apart until there was a silent, but sharp inhale from the kingpin watching.
He's, obviously, seen you nude before. Probably memorized everything there was to see, but the two-coloured gaze still dropped to rove over the skin you were exposing as you slowly peeled the coat from your form - stopping when it was just-barely off your shoulders.
Not because Silco ordered you to, but the subtle flexing of his throat when he swallowed dry at the sight, was enough to stop you still.
"... this is a surprise."
"If I known you were busy, I wouldn't have-"
"Where did you put the rest of your clothes?"
Someone probably could cook an omlette on your forehead, your face never blushed so hard as you whispered, "I... there wasn't any. I came here like this."
A thoughtful hum breaks the too-long pause, and he stands. Your hands fall limp at your sides at the first step he makes towards you, and it only takes another step before his own hands come up, long fingers replacing yours on the hem of your coat. "You seem quite mortified for someone who planned this well in-advance," He comments in a conversational tone, all the while you're struggling jot to tremble as his knuckles graze your skin, and the coat is ushered further, and further down from your body...
"Though," Warm breath tickles at your hairline - it's somehow hotter than your body has become. "I fail to see why you have any reason to be embarrassed... and I am seeing much."
The coat crumbles to the ground in a heap around your ankles, and palms are quick to replace it along your body.
Searing, burning palms that graze with biting nails - you're left gasping, but not long on air. His mouth comes up quick to replace oxygen, and even quicker to mute your squeal when his fingers find your ass as squeeze.
"You walked through the Lanes, with so much as a stitch beneath a flimsy coat. How filthy," He snarls into your mouth with a wolfish grin, one that would have your legs weak if... they suddenly weren't off the ground.
"Silco-" You gasped, legs wrapping around his waist as you were lifted, tucking your head against his shoulder with another surprise squeak as his nails digged-in your skin, before he propped you atop the desk.
"Your meeting-" "Can wait," Murmuring quietly against the shell of your ear, his faint chuckle seemed to echo in your head when you whimpered. His hands seemed eager to map out skin he already knew by-heart, palm coming up to cup your chest and knead, while long fingers took time to trace down every vertebre of your spine. "Paitence can be mastered, and perhaps this could be considered a first-lesson for my buisness partner. It can wait."
Silco, however, could not.
This is proven by how quickly, and smoothing, his hand comes to trace around your hip, and begin to dip between your thighs. This earns another shaking rasp, one that is soothed to a whimper with a kiss along your jawline, as his fingers dip and start to tease along your already wet slit-
There's a knock.
One that makes you jump, and start to slip from the desk, but both Silco's arm around your waist, and the finger dipping between to graze along your clit, forces you to remain against him as he growls, "What?"
"He's here," Sevika's voice drawls, clearly bored and a bit miffed at being intruppted from her card-game downstairs. Considering what you're doing now, you can sympathize. "Not looking happy about waiting either..."
"A pity." Silco's quiet words indeed make you sympathize with Sevika's plight of being taken from her source of enjoyment, as you imagine you're about to be in the same boat. You can't fault him from it, but as you go to creep away, you can't help but feel a spark of dejection-
A spark, that erupts into flame when he pushes his finger through your folds, curling into your pussy. Only to the first knuckle, but it's enough to make you understand that it's not a pity you have to leave - but that his buisness meeting is going to be very, very delayed.
Silco's unyielding and fiery gaze, fingers slowly beginning to pump in, out of your tight wetness, and his next words, were enough to make you whimper again as heat flashed through you:
"Tell him I'm busy."
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acourtofthought · 4 months
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Always the argument from E/riels claiming Eluciens only have the bond to base their ship on.
The following are all the things Elain has said directly to Azriel and Lucien throughout the series to the best of my knowledge.
I'm not including the references to the characters being left alone considering there was one example of this for Elain and Az on Solstice and two where Feyre left Elain and Lucien alone to talk (once before he left to find Vassa and once after the war) and we weren't witness to the actual diologue.
E/RIEL
"Can you truly fly?"
"That's very beautiful, is it not - frightening, though? To fly so high?"
"Beautiful"
“I saw young hands wither with age. I saw a box of black stone. I saw a feather of fire land on snow and melt it.”. “It was angry,” “It was so, so angry that something was taken. So it took something from them as punishment.
“The queen—with the feathers of flame.".
“Yes.”
“Yes.”
“You came for me.”
“I—I don’t know how to use it—”
"Hello"
"I - I'll be right back".
"I've never participated in one of these."
"Oh, that's from me."
"I had Madja make it for me"
"It's a powder to mix in with any drink."
"It's for the headaches everyone always gives you. Since you rub your temples so often."
"He proposed marriage the next morning."
"I was coming to leave this in your pile of presents. I forgot to give it to you earlier."
"Here."
"You put them in your ears, and they block out any sound. With Nesta and Cassian living there with you..."
"Nesta wouldn't appreciate the joke"
"It's beautiful, put it on me?"
"I should go"
"Yes"
ELUCIEN
"Who are you?"
"Lucien, from my sisters stories. Her friend."
"You were in Hybern"
"You betrayed us."
"I was to be married in a few days."
"I can hear your heart."
"When I sleep, I can hear your heart beating through the stone."
"Can you hear mine?"
"No one ever does. No one ever looked - not really."
"He did. He saw me. He will not now."
"What - what was that?"
"It felt...strange," "Like you pulled on a thread tied to a rib."
"I'm fine," "Are you -"
"Nesta did. I just stabbed him."
"You could come to Velaris"
"I should get refreshments"
Elain and Lucien have never actually given things a chance, they've both had way too much to first come to terms with before addressing their bond (something Mor, with her gift of Truth confirms).
But in their FIRST meeting, the very first moment they ever shared a conversation with one another, Elain was the most raw and real we've ever seen her.
She spoke of her deepest emotions. Not what she observed about someone else, not talking about her visions, not making polite party conversation.
Where has she ever let her guard down like that around Azriel?
For the supposed epic love story they've got going on off page, the most exciting thing E/riel spoke of when finally alone after a year revolved around Nesta and Cassian and they've never shared a meaningful conversation on the pages of the actual book. In book 2, Az told Elain a story about Illyrians that he doesn't even relate to because he didn't learn to fly when he was young therefore he wasn't even speaking for himself.
Yet Elucien's are the ones clinging to flimsy reasons for their ship?! Earplugs and hook ups do not a love story make. Some readers seem confused about the author they're reading since SJM loves banter and diologue so much she said she had to cut multiple pages of Bryce and Hunt talking trash while playing the equivalent of Mario Kart so yeah, E/riels lack of sharing anything real is a problem.
With Lucien, Elain expressed anger, sadness, worry. She said she could hear his heart. Literally the first time she ever spoke to him.
And after that she felt Lucien reach out to her through the bond, with her commenting that she felt him inside of her and he blushed over what he found. Sorry but you're telling me that's not romantic yet Elain mentioning Azriel's Siphons (maybe scars, both surface level things) as beautiful is?! Sparkly stones versus Elain breathing that she felt Lucien's connection to her?
Elain is observant, we saw multiple examples of this through the series so her also paying attention to things having to do with Az (like the headache powder) aren't unique to Az. We got that big moment in SF where Cassian noted Elain saw everything when it had come to Nesta.
What matters is which of the two males Elain has opened herself up to and so far, that's only been Lucien.
We don't know why she turned around and avoided him in the novella but considering Nesta turned around and avoided Cassian in the same book, that's not all that big a deal. She could have gotten scared at how quickly she did open up to him, Graysens rejection could have frightened her to feeling too deeply for someone else again, she might be nervous at how out of control she feels around Lucien, she may not be ready to fully let go of her humanity. There are so many possibilities.
But the depth of emotion that we witnessed between Elucien before that, the realness of what Elain said to him is one of the reasons people ship them.
We've never seen any character draw that much out of Elain and I look forward to more of it in her book.
That's not even accounting for the many number of personality traits they share, similar views on violence, a love of nature, a similar sense of humor, their social skills, etc.
Acting like the bond is all we've got when it comes to Elucien is the other side playing clueless and it's not a great look.
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domxmarvel · 2 years
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Avengers Preference-FTM
3 Year Masterlist    
Prompt: Pride month  FTM!Reader
Warnings: Mentions of periods,top scars,brief mention of dead name
Loki
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There was gonna be a huge ball at the palace. Loki had dragged you along,you weren't a big fan of parties you couldn't remember the last time you'd be to one. Of course Loki wouldn't let you anywhere near the ballroom without the right attire,he had gone through his entire closet. Picking a couple outfits and setting them to the side.
"Alright,take your clothes off" You froze,you hadn't told him yet. "Y/N?" 
"Loki there's something I have to tell you"
"If you're embarrassed I promise I won't look"
"It's not that,although I appreciate it. It's actually my scars,no one has seen them yet. And I haven't even told you that I'm"He reached out putting his hand on top of yours.
"Y/N it's okay believe me I understand and you don't have to say it until you want. Now try these on" He got up and turned his back to you. 
"Loki you can look,but how did you know?" He turned to face you.
"I'm not exactly clueless on these things" You knew exactly what Loki was referring to,what everyone else called 'lady Loki' who was beautiful and you were always supportive of who Loki was. "Now come we can't be late"
***
Walking into the ballroom,your arms entwined. A few people stared but they didn't last long. Suddenly a woman walked up to you. Before she had a chance to say anything Loki greeted her.
"Hello mother,I'd like to introduce you to Y/N. My,what is it that midgardians say?" He thought for a moment "Boyfriend" He blurted out. She turned to face you,smiling.
Dr.Strange
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Training was longer today,the ancient one had put you in charge of training Stephen. Begin one of the best helped a lot,Stephen was a quick learner and you couldn't be happier with how far he'd come in a short time. Since you spent so much time together you were naturally close,which resulted in you developing a crush on him. 
He managed to knock you to the ground,but quickly knelt down.
"Y/N are you okay?"He asked. You could feel your binder digging into your ribs,it was getting hard to breathe. 
"I'm fine" He helped you up. "That's enough for today" You walked back to your room,quickly taking off your binder. Taking a few deep breaths,suddenly there was a knock at the door.
"Y/N" 
"Yes?" You opened the door slightly,not enough for him to see much.
"I just wanted to make sure you're okay" He pushed the door slightly. "I was worried since you were wearing your binder for a long time" He pushed the door open and walked in.
"You knew?" He just nodded. 
"I just want you to know that I don't think of you any differently" Moving closer you kissed his cheek.
"Thank you" He smiled at you "But don't think I'll go easier on you"
Bucky
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Bucky was curled up on the bed,he was shirtless and you could see his scars. Before you realize you started tracing them with your finger,you felt him shiver. He moved onto his side and you moved to lay down,putting your arm around him. You felt a bigger scar just near his abs,you moved to sit up. Bucky rolled over onto his back,letting you see the scar more clearly.
"Where's this from?" You asked without thinking. 
"It's a long story" 
"Sorry I didn't mean to"
"It's okay,I'm actually surprised it took you so long to ask about any of them" He sat up,his back against the headboard.
“Well you never asked about mine”He had seen your scars a few times,but he never said anything.
“I just thought you didn’t want to talk about it. But now that you brought it up how did you get those?” 
“They’re from my top surgery”You explained,before you could say anything else he pulled you into a hug. You kissed his cheek,he took off his dog tags putting them on you instead. You didn’t ask,you just kissed him again.
Peter parker/Spider-man
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Peter was one of the first people you came out to,you had been friends for years. He had been there for you through your transition. Today you were going to get top surgery and Peter came with you. 
“So how do you feel?”
“Like a weight has been lifted off my chest”He laughed,putting his hand on your arm. “Thank you for coming with me”
“Anytime”
After a few hours you were let out,Peter insisted that you stay with him while you were recovering. You were watching a movie when Peter suddenly asked.
“Y/N do you wanna go out with me sometime?”His face was completely red as he avoided your eyes. 
“I’d love to”You leaned forward,pressing your lips onto his cheek.
Tony Stark/Iron man
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You rushed down to the lab.
“Tony!”You quickly ran into his arms,crying.
“Y/N,what’s wrong? What happened?”He asked,panicked. Picking up your phone you showed him the article,he took your phone as you continued crying. You knew what you were getting into when you started dating Tony,but you never expected that someone would go as far as to out your birth name. “Y/N,I’m so sorry. I promise you they won’t get away with this” He held you until you calmed down,his hands rubbing your back.
“What now?”You asked.
“I have an idea but you’ll need to be there with me”
Since it was pride month,the news of your outing was met with support from the community. Along with a lot of criticism to the reporters and news outlets. You felt a lot better knowing that you weren’t the only one upset. Although Tony still wanted to go through with his plan and so did you. You were both going to a pride parade,he had draped a flag over your shoulders like a cape. And painting the flags on your cheeks. You couldn’t be happier standing there with Tony,just being confident in who you are.
Natasha romanoff/Black widow
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You knew today was gonna be terrible,you got your period and everything was awful. Thankfully there weren’t any emergencies today,which meant you could stay in bed all day. You were mindlessly scrolling on your phone,when Natasha walked in.
“Hey feeling any better?”She asked,rummaging through the paper bag she was holding. “I brought some stuff that might help”
“I feel better,thank you”You gave her a quick kiss. 
“Now move over”She laughed,climbing in beside you.You wrapped your arm around her. “So you wanna watch a movie or something?”
“Only if we can cuddle”
“Sure as long as you don’t fall asleep on me”She laughed,grabbing the remote.
Hela
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No one dared say anything to you,since you were dating the goddess of death. Hela was extremely proud of you and would show you off like you were her treasure. Which you secretly loved,the way she talked about you was enough to make you blush like crazy. Today just wasn’t a good day for you,your dysphoria had been acting up worse that usual. You avoided mirrors and any type of reflective surface,not wanting to see your reflection. Hela was in the throne room as you made your way in;she looked you up and down,she quickly gestured to one of the guards. They left as soon as you reached the throne. 
“Something bothering you?”She stood up,taking your hand in hers.
“No,I'm fine.”You lied,avoiding her eyes. 
“Y/N please don’t lie to me,i can tell that you’re not fine”You walked out to the balcony behind the throne,with Hela following you. You leaned over the balcony,looking over Asgard. 
"What do you think they'd say?" Hela stood beside you,a confused look on her face. "About me? If they knew"
"They wouldn't,no one would dare say anything about my king. And if they did they'd have to deal with me" She pulled you closer,kissing you as your hands wrapped around her.
Shuri
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Shuri had called you telling you to come to the lab,she had said that she was working on something for you. But didn’t tell you what it was. As you walked in you noticed that it was surprisingly empty,looking around you only saw Shuri. 
“There you are!”She stood up,pulling you along to a table. “When you told me you're transgender I did some research into binders and I remembered hearing you complain that they're uncomfortable,and I didn't want that"
You pulled her close,kissing her cheek. It warmed your heart that she did,even though she didn’t have to. She smiled at you. “As I was saying,I didn’t want you to be in pain all the time. So i did what i do best” She said clearly proud of herself,she handed you a binder. The material of it felt a lot softer though.
“Do you want me to try it on now?”
“If you want to”Her tone made it obvious that she wanted you to wear it. She turned around letting you take your shirt off,your binder was difficult to take off and got stuck. You turned away from Shuri.
“Shuri,could you help me?”
“Of course”You felt her hands on your back,pulling your binder over your head. “I can promise that you won’t have to worry about that with mine”You couldn’t see but you knew that she was smirking. You put on the one she made,she was right it was way more comfortable than a regular one. It wasn’t too tight but it still made your chest look flat.
“Shuri you can look now” She turned to face you,smiling.
“Looks like I got the size perfectly. How do you feel?”
“A lot more comfortable than my old one”You joked.
“It’s not too tight is it? It’s not affecting your breathing?”She asked,carefully touching it, avoiding your chest directly and only touching your sides.
“It’s incredible Shuri,you practically did the impossible”You reassured her,giving her a kiss.
M’baku
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It was just a normal day,nothing was really going on. So you just walked up to the throne room,finding M’baku sitting on the throne. When he saw you,he gestured for you to come over. He immediately pulled you into his lap.
“Did you sleep well,my prince?” You chuckled,putting your arm around his shoulders. He kissed you,putting his arm around your waist. 
“I love it when you call me that.”You moved to kiss his jaw down to his neck,he laughed. Last night was incredible,it was the first time you had sex with him. You were thinking about it,when suddenly you noticed that the room was empty. He put his hand on your thigh
“How do you feel? I wasn’t too rough was I?”He asked,and you quickly kissed him.
“Not at all. Last night was amazing”He smiled,clearly proud of himself. “Can you call me that again?”
“Call you what?”He asked,you blushed avoiding his eyes. “My prince”You buried your head into his neck.
T’challa
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Your relationship had been a secret,while T’challa’s father was the king. But when he became king,nothing could stop him. Both Shuri and his mother were proud,Shrui was the only person who knew before he became king. She was always there for both of you. You were happy with T’challa,but you were scared of what the people would say. Not that they dared since he was the king,but you still thought about it. You were laying in bed with him next to you.
“Do you think the people of wakanda hate me?”He instantly bolted up.
“What are you talking about,darling? No one would say that”
“They don’t have to”You got up walking towards the window,he followed you. “I mean they probably think it’s already bad enough that you’re dating a man,let alone that I’m trans. And don’t even get me started on the whole heir to the throne problem” He immediately looked concerned and worried,you had never seen him like this. 
“Y/N you know that I love you,I don't care what anyone says. Or traditions all i care about is the man i love and that’s you. I want you to stay with me,for as long as I’m king no one will ever disrespect you and get away with it. Y/N will you marry me?”You froze,you had a feeling he was gonna ask you but not like this not now,although your answer was still the same.
“Yes I will”
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hauntedwitch04 · 1 year
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Chocolate
🎃Halloween party🎃  
Remus Lupin x reader 
Words: about 0.6k words
Warning: drinking under age, making out and sarcastic Sirius, but it’s mostly fluff 
Author’s note: I’m late, but as I said I hate school and I hate physics even more. Hope you like day 12!
✒️:  “Feel lucky that I share my treats with you.” “I left all the chocolate to you.” “That’s why I love you.”  
Requests are open I  Ask  I  My masterlist   I  Join the Taglist
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Like every Friday night, you and your friends are lounging on the couches in the Common Room, glad that another busy week of school is over and the weekend has finally begun. 
Since you are during the Halloween season, the only thing you could steal from the kitchens was candy and treats, not that any of you were complaining, since in addition to those you had a good dose of incendiary whiskey, courtesy of Sirius, who had managed to bribe the Hogsmeade bar and buy a couple. 
You are all now more than tipsy, some more than less. Lily and James are making out in the corner, as if they were alone in the world and that all their friends hadn't been gagging at their sappiness. Sirius sat with Mary, Dorcas and his brother Regulus around the fire, and they are discussing the latest Quidditch matches, while still passing the bottle of alcohol around, laughing between sips. Peter is asleep in the armchair, in his mouse form, having drunk almost an entire bottle by himself, while you and your boyfriend Remus are sitting on the couch. 
Remus has his legs spread apart, on which yours rest, since you are placed sideways. On your waist lies the last bowl of candy and chocolates that you have, which you and your boyfriend are arranging to disappear, eating them all. 
You can't help but stare at it, admiring its beauty in the firelight illuminating the room with an air charged with magic. You watch his scars, his full lips, his unruly hair falling over his forehead, and his hazel eyes examining which dessert to take one after another. Your mind clouded by alcohol cannot help but think of one and only one thing: kiss him until you are out of breath. Could you die? Yes. Would that be the most beautiful way to die? Of course it would. Would you do it a billion more times? Obviously. 
He turns, feeling your gaze on him, and looks at you questioningly. 
"Am I dirty in the face?" He asks touching his mouth, wiping it clean. You can't help but roll your eyes. 
"I wouldn't be surprised if I were you, given the amount of chocolates you're eating."  You say.
"Feel lucky that I share my treats with you." He says before taking another chocolate. "I have to eat if I want to become a big bad wolf, the most I am now is the slim clumsy wolf." He says with his mouth full. You can't help but smile to see that for once he's talking about the other except in a completely negative way, even if it's all just because of the alcohol.
"I left all the chocolate to you." You respond by taking another candy. 
He smiles at you, moves closer and kisses you noisily, almost comically. 
"That's why I love you." He exclaims, pulling away from the kiss. You don't pull away though, you stay close. You don't know how, probably his intoxicating scent, sugars and alcohol help and you can't help but say whatever is on your mind. 
"You look really cute tonight." You whisper looking into his eyes. "In fact, not just cute, awfully sexy, too." You continue, smiling. 
"That's funny because I was thinking the same thing about you." He continues before kissing you again as Sirius cries out in despair. 
"Guys please don't start making out too that we already have those other two practically about to procreate our nephew and our niece in front of us." 
Needless to say, Sirius took two pillows to the face for that sentence: one from Remus and one from Lily, who, however, could not help but laugh.
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themushroomgoesyeet · 2 months
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Arcana Characters as Lord of the Rings
Y'all wouldn't believe how long it took me to come to this conclusion, I might be having a bit of a writer's block moment today
Julian - Pipin Took
Is Julian entirely too tall to be a hobbit? Yes
Does Julian have the same pension for dumbassery as Pipin? Also yes
Very big "no thoughts head empty" energy with these two
Plus Julian could definitely challenge the drinking tolerance of a hobbit fight me
Despite their bawdy & lighthearted personalities, both also have the capability of a rather poetic sorrow, and incredibly honorable loyalty and bravery as well
Asra - Gandalf
Mysterious™ with an unmatched wanderlust? Check
A vast pool of magical wisdom and always down to get high as balls? Check
Expert at disappearing when the plot needs them most? Check
This also makes a great double dynamic when you pair them with the Julian/Pipin combo, as both Gandalf & Asra spend most of their time calling their charges out in their dumbassery
Nadia - Arwen
Classy, regal, beautiful women
Both also have a fair amount of independence and quiet strength that can sway armies
It's not shown in the movies but Arwen is actually a total badass when she wants to be; she actually helps fight in the battle for Helm's Deep; so now we have two bad ass women with prodigious sword skills
Both are very devoted and passionate lovers as well
Muriel - Beorn
Idk how many people know about/remember this character but he's in the Hobbit
Pretty much a big dude who can turn into a bear, & who's front yard is the home of a farm's worth of both wild & domestic animals
Dude doesn't like visitors (at least not ones that aren't animals), but if you manage to get on his good side he'll be fairly hospitable
If that doesn't scream Muriel idk what does
Portia - Eowyn
Yet another strong, independent woman
I feel like she and Portia share the same firey spirit that people tend to underestimate
Eowyn is kind, caring, friendly, and devoted to her people even if she's not allowed to show it, & I find that fits Portia quite well
Both also start out illiterate (to my knowledge)
Portia is also definitely the kind of person to pull the "I am no man" line
They may look nice but they can and will throw hands when they want to
Lucio - King Thranduil
If anyone could match Lucio's pension for parties it would be the king of the party elves
Sassy, moody, greedy, kind of a bitch, older than they look, blonde
Also Lord knows they are not at all good with children (Thranduil may love his son but he sure ain't a good father)
They hide their scars (at least Thranduil does in the movie; I don't think he has that burn scar in the books), Lucio with a big, gaudy prosthetic arm & Thranduil with glamour and elf magic
Can totally kick ass when they want to but usually don't bc ✨war trauma✨
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ursulaap · 10 days
Text
Yes or No?
Summary: Chad has protected you from everything, he's protected you from Ghostface, and he wants to do it forever. But he doesn't realize your age
After the events in Woodsboro, Chad fought for his life during the operations. He almost died. Mindy had major surgery, but it wasn't as bad as Chad's. You were cool. Nothing happened to you. It couldn't be because Chad kept his head up and wouldn't let you go to the party. He was determined to protect his little sister. Chad and Mindy are twins, but Mindy has never needed care. And Chad wanted to protect someone. When you were born, Chad protected you from the first moment. When he was little, he gave you all the Pokemon toys. While you slept, he stood by your bed with a child's bow and arrows. It should have been safe, but it wasn't. That's why your cat only had one eye. He protected you from everything.
Chad and Mindy are worried about you. Chad has known Ethan for a year, but after all the murders, he can't trust anyone. Mindy has a problem with that too. He doesn't trust anyone, but he lets himself be guided by the love he feels for Anika. Everything changed when you entered university. Chad is overprotective. Mindy too. You try to fight and you want your space. There is a lot to do after a month at university. "Can't you fucking leave me alone for a minute?" I yell at Chad "When you're not here, Mindy's here! I need my privacy!"
He slammed the bedroom door and leaned against it. You know you're irrational, but you hate the feeling of suffocating in Chad and Mindy's over-protective bubble. You can't deny that you're glad they're taking care of you, but you just wish they'd stop sometime. Chad sat down and turned on the TV. It waits for you to cool down. He knows how hot you can be. He didn't want to argue with you. You suddenly get a crazy idea. Climb the stairs out the window and go to Chad's room when Chad is in your room. You hope Ethan will let you in. You knock on the door and Ethan opens it. "Hi" you say. "Hi," Ethan replies cautiously. He is surprised to see you at the door of his room and is a little embarrassed. He likes you, but he knows you're Chad's sister, and that's forbidden. And she's still a little afraid of Chad.
“Uh… sure, come on in,” he replies, stepping back to let you in. He knows it's not really appropriate to let you into his room while your brother is gone, but he also wants to support you and understand what's going on. Ethan closes the door and sits next to you on the couch. He doesn't say anything right away and waits for you to start talking. He's not sure what to make of your sudden arrival in his room, and he's afraid he'll say something bad that could only make things worse. "I'm really sick of Mindy and Chad worrying about me. They watch me every step of the way. I have no privacy," you say not so much angrily but sadly.
Ethan had heard very little about Chad and Mindy being attacked. But he also heard Chad say that nothing happened to you. The two of them survived and have scars, you're fine without a scratch because you were safe the whole time, that's what mattered most to them. And Ethan knows it, so he keeps quiet. Ethan sighed. He listened to you but didn't say anything. He was looking at you and you knew he understood you even without words.
“I, um… I just wanted to talk and I didn't know who to go to. you speak quietly
“I feel like there are always a million people around me asking questions and making sure I'm okay. And I feel kind of, you know, stuffy." you speak with tears in your eyes
Ethan held you tightly as you leaned against his chest. "They're just worried about you. But I know you're already uncomfortable."
You finally felt safe in his arms.
Ethan's hug was sweet and you didn't want to let go. At this moment, you felt calm and all worries and stress seemed to melt away.
You felt protected and taken care of. However, you felt your privacy and ultimately made your own decisions about your life. "I think something else is bothering me. you say sadly, admitting it to yourself for the first time. Ethan looked at you and knew something was really bothering you.
Ethan asked you. "What else is bothering you? Do you want to talk about it?" "They're still worried about me. But when Ghostface stabbed them, I wasn't there. I was safe because they wanted me to be. I should have been there to help them. But they're worried about me." Why? They were stabbed! But still all that matters is me, as if nothing happened!" i say cry Ethan nodded.
He understood your confusion and how frustrating it is not to understand why they care so much about each other.
He looked at you for a moment and sighed.
"They care about you a lot. They want to keep you safe because they love you." “But I love them too and I don't want them to sacrifice themselves again,” you whisper without a voice, only your sobs coming out.
“I know you love them and you would do the same for them. They love you as much as you love them." Ethan slowly comforted you.
He knows you're still shaken by the events of that night, but you feel so much better in this hug.
You felt safe, held and listened.
What could be better? You feel safe and happy. You suddenly feel butterflies all over your body. You pull away from Ethan and look into his eyes. Your gaze doesn't last too long before your eyes land on his lips. Ethan notices you staring at his lips longer than you'd like. He decides whether to make the first move. He has thoughts and worries in his head that if Chad finds out that Ethan kissed you… Chad is really scared. But now here with you, Ethan feels something he's never felt with anyone before. He wants you.
Part 2?
@willow-parker23
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luxaria-nocturne · 1 year
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The Tragedy of Daiman Desmond
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As cute as it is, I'm starting to suspect that Daiman's crush on Anya is actually the result of some pretty deep scars in this kid. Scars that honestly make the whole situation so heartbreaking.
I always found it a little weird that this moment was the one that really kicked everything off.
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First off, yes, I know that Anya is cute. But we need to put things into the perspectives of a six-year old. Physical attraction isn't something that immediately leaps out at a kid, why would it? They may have an inkling that they like how someone looks, but they don't often link that romantic feelings. (Unless they’re like Becky, who absorbs romantic media and tropes from her surroundings like a sponge, but doesn't actually grasp the reasons behind how romance and attraction works.)
They're at that age where you get yourself a schoolyard girlfriend because she brings cool erasers to class. So what's actually going on here?
One of the first things we learn about Daiman's home life is how distant his parents are to their children.
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Both his mother and father have no trouble displaying how extremely and openly dismissive they are towards their son, in public and to his face. Melinda's friends phrase their style as "hands-off." It can be assumed that both Daiman and Demetrius live in the dorms at Eden, which adds to the barrier between them and their parents.
We've only seen bits and pieces of what home life was like for Daiman pre-Eden. He had his dog, Max, and probably care from some of their maids/butlers (similar to Becky) but even after being punched he knew that his father couldn't care less. Bumps and scraps, big inconveniences, things that he wanted to show off... the Desmonds probably disregarded their son at every turn.
So let's touch back on this.
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When Anya apologized to Daiman for punching him, an action that not only hurt him but rightfully left him embarrassed, she started to cry.
What Daiman would be seeing, maybe for the first time, was a person so broken up about hurting him and his feelings that they were moved to tears. His parents ignore or step around him like an inconvenience. His staff spare his feelings, but he can tell they're being disingenuous. Ewen and Emile are good buddies, but at this point in the story they're still little more than hype-men just as concerned with Daimen's status as he is. This moment to Daiman is someone genuinely caring.
...But it's not.
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Anya isn't actually caring about Daiman in this moment. She's breaking down from how judgemental he and his friends are being to her. And she's only doing this at all for Loid's mission. In fact, a lot of her attempts to get close to Daiman are just for that. And why would she want to be his friend when he's been so quick to treat her poorly? In her shoes, I wouldn't want to be friends with the kid either!
Anya doesn't want to befriend Daiman for the reasons that he wants her to. However...
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When Daiman is genuinely upset about something, Anya reaches out. Because she's a good person and, to use his words, it's not like she hates him. It's these moments of vulnerability that bring him the closest to earning her friendship, unfortunately, it’s been ingrained into him that he must strive to be invulnerable. Perfect. A Desmond.
I think that's why moments like these warm my heart the most.
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We'll probably never see the Desmond family improve for Damian, not without some serious sacrifices from certain parties involved. Including himself. But he can find a support group at school that he lacks at home. With genuine friends who reach out to him when he's upset, instead of treating his feelings like a problem.
#HappinessForDamian
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erabu-san · 6 months
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So, about your found family head canon, I absolutely LOVE it and I wanted to give you my own take on it!!
I like to also include Candace, Razor, and Wanderer (I know that one might not make sense but hear me out lmao)
I think Cyno would Candace as a big sister! She gives off that vibe to everyone but I feel like she would be more close with Cyno considering they're both from. Or maybe they knew each other while Cyno lived in the desert. (We NEED more more Cyno lore *sob*)
As for Razor, I think during their visit to Mondstadt Razor would become intrigued with Cyno because of the ears on his helmet (hat?). Also....those two are suspiciously alike🤨 white hair, red eyes... (Cyno has lighter eyes but they're similar) I wouldn't be surprised if genshin pulled a long lost brother thing on us🧍 Anyway, I think they would become close, and Razor would look up to him a lot!! He would start to see Cyno as his "lupical" and I think Cyno would enjoy spending time with Razor, teaching him fighting tactics and so on
And Wanderer (or Scaramouche). I think his bratty mean persona would make him really...hard to be close to. But I think he and Collei would actually be somewhat "friends". I think the traveler would be talking about Collei to Wanderer and bring up her relationship with Dottore which would immediately peak his interest. And maybe he would go to see her to ask her about it, and then they would be able to bond over being victims of Dottore. I think he would gain the role of the "overprotective big brother" and glare at anyone who dare LOOK at her the wrong way. I'm not saying this relationship would be likely, it's just fun to think about!
I also think about how awkward it would be bringing up the time when Tighnari got struck by lightning....
"Master Tighnari actually got struck by lightning once! Now he has a scar on his back!"
"*Nervous sweating* Yeah......about that-"
I also hc that Kaveh and Tighnari are childhood friends!
Sorry I know I typed a lot😭
Have a nice day!
WAAAAH Cyno and Candace are so BESTIE CODED !!! Yes candace give a big sister vibe ! I love to imagine that Cyno likes visiting Candace, when he has time... And also I imagine he participate to girls party once, with Candace Dehya Nilou Dunyarzad and Setaria. Idk. I just feel like he wants to be included. Dehya and Setaria would be a bit against at first but Candace Nilou Dunyarzad thought the idea funny, so he joined. In the end, they all spend great time ! For Razor and Cyno, yes !!! I agree with your idea. I also enjoy a lot the potential friendship between Collei and Razor !! They are both studying language, they could study together. Since Razor has more difficulty about language, Collei would help him (and I am sure she will feel accomplishment,, like,,, she is helping someone!!! in studying!!)
Razor would definitively talk about Varka to Cyno ahahaha (i love varka plz when is he playable, at least i need to know how does he look like) And for Wanderer... I saw a lot of fanart of Collei and him, trashtalking about dottore. It would be super cool if Wanderer first friend (after his redemption arc, if we don't count Nahida nor Traveler) is Collei ! I have another scenario for them starting to talk Wanderer is just chilling in Avidya Forest (missing school). Then he heard a voice in a tree... like wtf. It was a girl voice, ranting about her life. He wouldn't care a lot but then he heard the mention of Dottore. The curiosity gain him. Trash talk about dottore ?? It is not often he can hear it. Bro is eardropping (bad thing to do) but Collei notice him (someone find her hidden place, she could die of embarrassment) but Wanderer couldn't help himself to trashtalk to dottore- and they keep talking But I wonder... if Scaramouche participate in those same experiment, and saw Collei ? He was about to end the conversation, feeling guilty, and never talk to Collei again, but Collei thank him for the talk. Maybe it wouldn't bad to see her again, one day ? OOOH YOUKNOW I AM SURE KAVEH AND TIGHNARI MET WHEN THEY WERE KID. I MEAN !!!! Their parents knows each other when they were young. Maybe they met, but they wasn't that close. After Kaveh asked some advice for his project, they started to talk more, and then their friendship come more naturally Have a nice day too!!!
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alastairstom · 1 year
Text
evermore songs as tlh characters/ships
I saw someone do this for Folklore and Evermore's my favourite album, so...
sorry nbnc isn't included i just had no idea what to do with it lol
willow -> thomas @ alastair
Wait for the signal and I'll meet you after dark Show me the places where the others gave you scars Now this is an open-shut case Guess I should've known from the look on your face Every bait and switch was a work of art
champagne problems -> james @ cordelia + matthew
[He'll] patch up your tapestry that I shred And hold your hand while dancing Never leave you standing Crestfallen on the landing With champagne problems
gold rush -> matthew
What must it be like To grow up that beautiful? With your hair falling into place like dominoes My mind turns your life into folklore I can't dare to dream about you anymore At dinner parties Won't call you out on your contrarian shit And the coastal town We never found will never See a love as pure as it
tis the damn season -> anna @ ari
Sleep in half the day just for old times' sake I won't ask you to wait if you don't ask me to stay So I'll go back to L.A. and the so-called friends Who'll write books about me, if I ever make it And wonder about the only soul who can tell which smiles I'm fakin' And the heart I know I'm breakin' is my own
tolerate it -> alastair @ charles
honestly this one is too fitting it was so hard to choose a quote but--
I greet you with a battle hero's welcome I take your indiscretions all in good fun I sit and listen, I polish plates until they gleam and glisten You're so much older and wiser and I...
happiness -> matthew @ cordelia
After giving you the best I had Tell me what to give after that All you want from me now is the green light of forgiveness You haven't met the new me yet And I think [he'll] give you that
dorothea -> ari @ anna
It's never too late To come back to my side The stars in your eyes Shined brighter in Tupelo And if you're ever tired of being known For who you know You know, you'll always know me
coney island -> james @ cordelia
Did I close my fist around something delicate? Did I shatter you? And I'm sitting on a bench in Coney Island Wondering, "Where did my baby go?" The fast times, the bright lights, the merry-go Sorry for not making you my centerfold
ivy -> alastair @ thomas while in paris
Oh, goddamn My pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand Taking mine, but it's been promised to another Oh, I can't Stop you putting roots in my dreamland My house of stone, your ivy grows And now I'm covered in you
cowboy like me -> ari @ anna
And the skeletons in both our closets Plotted hard to mess this up And the old men that I've swindled Really did believe I was the one And the ladies lunching have their stories about When you passed through town But that was all before I locked it down
long story short -> matthew
I always felt I must look better in the rear view Missing me At the golden gates they once held the keys to When I dropped my sword I threw it in the bushes and knocked on your door And we live in peace But if someone comes at us This time, I'm ready
marjorie -> grace @ christopher (😭)
I should've asked you questions I should've asked you how to be Asked you to write it down for me Should've kept every grocery store receipt 'Cause every scrap of you would be taken from me Watched as you signed your name Marjorie All your closets of backlogged dreams And how you left them all to me
closure -> alastair @ charles after the end of chog
Yes, I got your letter Yes, I'm doing better It cut deep to know ya Right to the bone Yes, I got your letter Yes, I'm doing better I know that it's over I don't need your closure
evermore -> cordelia @ james
And I was catching my breath Floors of a cabin creaking under my step And I couldn't be sure I had a feeling so peculiar This pain wouldn't be for Evermore
right where you left me -> grace
I stayed there Dust collected on my pinned-up hair They expected me to find somewhere Some perspective, but I sat and stared
it's time to go -> matthew at the end of chot
Sometimes giving up is the strong thing Sometimes to run is the brave thing Sometimes walking out is the one thing That will find you the right thing That will find you the right thing And you know in your soul And you know in your soul When it's time to go
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