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#angst fluff
riverbutghost · 7 months
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He is much more older than you || 2
(sorry, this is a bit longer than I intended it to be and no more parts are coming, just your imagination ;)) part 1 here || part 3 here!!
You still couldn’t help but think about his words over and over again. It was hurtful, getting scolded from him was always hurtful. But this was something else, he had rejected you.
“Sir,”
You mumbled, and opened the door after he had told you to come in.
You didn’t say a word. You didn’t look at him. What happened to ‘You weren’t going to stop?’ huh?
You didn’t know what to do, God you weren’t that brave either. Your last encounter left something in your heart. A little crack.
You sighed, it was simple. You decided to not say anything if he didn’t, and if he did well, you weren’t sure if you could control your emotions.
“How are you?”
Yeah.
“I’m fine, sir. Have a good day.”
You mumbled and got out. Almost immediately after you left, your chest started tightening. You breathed deeply.
“Hey, long time no see!”
You jumped, all of the folders in your hand dropped to the floor.
“Oh my God, Gaz.”
You exclaimed, and he just laughed. You laughed too after a while, he was back. You started chatting with him, your mind was slowly losing your lieutenant’s words.
-
Simon on the other hand, wasn’t feeling all settled.
“Oh my God, Gaz.”
He heard your voice, slight excitement in it. His eyebrows were furrowed immediately. He felt primal, raging as if someone stole his mate.
As your voice were dying down, he got up and locked his door. He pulled off his mask, and rubbed his temple quite aggressively.
“Fuckin’ hell..”
He sighed. He knew he was denying it, everything. He was denying it, because that was easier. Easier than loving you. He knew it, and he hope you did too.
But this wasn’t enough. He was angry, hungry. He didn’t know what he wanted- no he knew. You.
“Sir..?”
He jumped up, grabbed his mask and put it on after hearing your soft, delicate voice.
“Yeah-yeah. Come in.”
You got in, a smile forming on your face. You were in a lighter mood, he assumed.
“Price told me to drop these off..”
You said, while giving him some of the documents that you were carrying. He sighed and thanked you, your scent making him feel.. yeah.
He cleared his throat, and you looked at him. You blinked a few times under your thick long eyelashes. He gave a breath.
“Gaz is back?”
“Yeah, thank god he is alive. Would you like a coffee, sir?”
His thighs tensed, and he fisted his hand. Closing his eyes, he shook his head.
“Are you okay-?”
He panicked, he didn’t want you to see it.
“Get out.”
There it was. You knew it would be like this if you ket your hopes up.
A disappointed sigh left your mouth as you got out of his room. Simon cursed himself, for making you sad again.
He was going to regret this.
He called your name. Yelled it, actually.
You turned around in shock, body tensing as your eyes connected with his’
“Yeah..?”
You mumbled. Confusion spread over your face.
“I. Fuck, come here.”
“What?”
He sighed and got up, steps coming in a hurry. He backed you up into the door, and you gasped quietly. You looked up at him.
“Do you have any idea what you’re doing to me?”
He calmly but firmly said, making your knees go weak.
“What am I doing to you, sir?”
He slammed his fist next to your head, cursing at the same time. You flinched. You liked it. He was finally caving in.
“You and this fuckin’ filthy little mouth. Beautiful little mouth.”
He looked up, almost trying to gain some control.
“Fuck it. I’m done playing games. Get over to the desk. Come on now, pretty girl.”
Your breathing was unsteady, your heart was pounding. You thighs were dripping.
“You asked for it, now get over to the desk. Let’s see if that’s what you want. This sweet little face is gonna be messed up.”
He clicked his tongue and rolled his sleeves up, making you mutter an ‘oh fuck’.
You knees buckled, but he held your waist.
“Now.”
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myg-butterfly · 1 year
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How Many Things
Yoongi x Reader
Summary: Yoongi invites you out to a party with him, and in trust, you say yes. But what happens when you lose him in the crowd, just to find him again with someone else by his side? In the midst of panic and longing, you wonder how many things he thinks about before he gets to you.
Tags: Non-Idol AU, Anti-Social Reader, Hurt/Comfort, Angst/Fluff
Warnings: Anxiety, descriptions of panic attacks, Yoongi is an asshole for a minute, some of his friends are big time assholes, insecurities, social anxiety, lots of feelings, Teahyung and Namjoon are sweethearts, crying, jealousy, author's first fic lol.
A/N: HEY HELLO HI!!! This is my first fic that I'm publishing here so pls be gentle 🙏 And if you enjoy, leave feedback, good or bad, I love interactions. This is self-indulgent comfort that I've been thinking about for a long while and I was like ,,,,,, Yoongi got me 🥰🙏 Also this was slightly inspired by Sabrina Carpenter's "how many things" from her album EICS go listen if you want the extra angst. So yeah, enjoy!
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You began to panic, the music was so, so loud, the clattering of dishes and glasses from the bar, the yelling, all the bodies and their humidity, it was all becoming too much, and to your dismay, Yoongi was nowhere to be seen.
You tried to recollect yourself as you began pushing through the crowd, determined on finding him. With every slip past a person, every step and stumble, you grew even more exhausted, but then finally, Yoongi came into view.
He was to the other end of the bar, a smile plastered in all his glory. Whoever he was talking to was clearly making him laugh, and just the sight of him made the tension in your shoulders ease a little bit. You were just about to call out to him, maybe even when fling yourself in his arms, but then-
Then you saw her. The one responsible for the way his face was currently scrunched with a happy grin. They stood close to each other, even as they turned the other way and moved to take a seat together at the bar. They were hand in hand, they looked like the human embodiment of perfection.
You felt your heart deflate as Yoongi pulled out a chair for her, proceeding to signal something to the bartender, the peace sign on his fingers and the pointing between him and her gave you the idea he asked for a drink for both of them. They continued to laugh and talk, and you had to force yourself to look away.
The sight of them made you remember why you hated going out, but even worse, you remembered why you vowed to not get romantically attached to anyone, especially not Yoongi.
The turning of your stomach was becoming hard to ignore, your quick breaths making matters worse. You knew you had to get out of there; with or without Yoongi. So with one last glance at him -who was still engrossed deeply in conversation with the woman next to him, leaning to whisper something in her ear and her reacting in a flustered manner- you fought your way to the door, tears beginning to spill the moment the night breeze greeted you.
As much as you wanted to just run and run and run until your body gave out on you, you knew better than to try and make it back to the dorms by foot.
You sighed defeatedly and pulled out your phone, texting the one person who you knew would be here without fail. As much as you didn't like bothering him (even though he's told you countless times you're not) you knew he'd scold you if you walked home on your own, and a scolding from him was never an enjoyable experience.
Y/N: are you busy rn?
Namjoon: Not currently. Why?
Y/N: can u pls come pick me up
Namjoon: Where are you? Are you safe?
Y/N: yeah, here's my location *📍*
Namjoon: I'll be there in less than 10. Stay put, okay?
Y/N: ok. ty joon.
Putting your phone away, you sat at the nearest bench you found, and attempted to stop the tears from falling further before Namjoon arrived.
But no matter how hard you tried, it was pretty much impossible to not think about why you were out here in the first place. Were you overreacting? Yoongi's allowed to have friends. So why are you so hurt? It's not even like you're together or anything.
In all honesty, you wanted to be mad at them.
You wanted to be mad at him for giving you even the slightest hope that there might be something more between you two.
You wanted to be mad at that girl he was with for being so damn perfect for him, for being everything that you could never begin to come close to.
But deep down you didn't have it in you to be angry at anyone but yourself.
How could you have been so stupid?
You knew that no one would want you romantically, you knew that all he felt for you was pity, that you'd never come first, and yet you still got your hopes up.
You let yourself dream that he wanted you like you wanted him. You believed all those things he said out of pity, all the reassurances and compliments, you knew that they were nothing but him simply being who he is; a naturally kind person.
You knew all of this, so why the hell were you crying? Why were you walking out and aimlessly trying to find anywhere else to go?
'Pathetic' you scoffed at yourself. You were being immature, everything everyone else had said about you was true. You were stupid to think otherwise.
Before you could continue to wallow in your self-pity, you felt a small tap to your shoulder, and you looked up to find Namjoon looking down at you.
"Y/N? Are you alright?" You quickly wiped away your remaining tears and nodded your head, standing up to greet him. "Yes, yes, I'm fine. Thank you for coming Namjoon." You bowed slightly, trying your best to look well put together. "It's no problem dear. My car's this way, come on."
"You want me to drive you back to your apartment?" You both got in his car and he asked as you put on your seatbelts. "Yes, please. Thank you." He only hummed in response as he began to drive, a soft tune playing on the radio, just loud enough to make it less awkward.
Namjoon knew you probably weren't in the mood to talk, and you were grateful for the silent understanding you guys shared. You weren't awfully close, but you'd shared your own personal memories with each other, and you mutually knew the other would be willing to lend a hand when needed. That's what you liked about him. He was just understanding like that.
The drive to your apartment was short, and even though you lived on the 3rd floor, Namjoon insisted on walking you to your door.
"Hey, take care okay? If you need anything else don't hesitate to call me, yeah?" He said as you reached your door, the genuine look on his face made you tear up once more.
"Yeah. Thank you, Joon." You waved him off as you stepped into your apartment, closing the door as he began to turn around.
You immediately kicked off your heels and went to grab a glass of water. You chugged it down as if you hadn't had a drop of water in days, proceeding to open your fridge and let the waterworks begin as you realized your appetite was gone just seeing the carton of orange juice sitting there with a sticky note that reads, "YOONGI'S!!! DO NOT DRINK >:("
He'd helped you with your groceries about 2 weeks ago, and the orange juice he bought was claimed by him, protesting that he needed "emergency juice" because he was at your apartment so often.
Not wanting to look at his skrunkly handwriting anymore, you shut the fridge door and rested your head in your hands on the kitchen counter.
The more you thought about it, the more prominent the ache in your chest became. He was the one who invited you to that party in the first place. He was the one who wanted you to have fun. He was the one that promised he wouldn't leave your side. Yet here you were, back at the dorms, hugging yourself in attempts to conceal your heartbreak.
If you had gone on your own and just happened to see him there with another girl, then that would have been a different story.
But no.
Yoongi himself told you two nights ago that he was invited to a party, and he wanted you to accompany him as his plus one. And as nervous and hesitant as you were, he spurred you on, encouraging; "No matter what you wear you'll look stunning." And "Everyone will love you" and "I won't leave your side, okay?"
That one stung the most when you thought about it, because not even 15 minutes into the party, Yoongi was nowhere to be seen. You could tell that most of his friends weren't too fond of you, and you felt ridiculous in the pink dress you wore.
You thought of how you'd taken hours to be able to look at yourself in the mirror and not cry at your appearance made you cringe. You tried so hard to look nice, to feel pretty, to feel wanted, and it still didn't work.
You grew angrier, why weren't you good enough? What made it so hard to love you? You practically ripped off your dress, the fabric suddenly piercing your skin, your arms wiping off your already smearing makeup furiously, and you stomped to your bed, plopping down violently before letting out a strangled groan that sounded more like a whimper.
You felt like shit. Your whole night was shit.
Were you overreacting? You had been rude too. I mean, you left without even telling him. You're just as bad, right?
He's the one who left you standing there, Y/N. Your brain going back and forth until you decided that falling asleep would be easier.
"Sooo how'd it go with lover boy last night? Assuming things went well from what I saw." An overly excited Taehyung appeared at your side, a smug grin on his face as he poked your arms. You just shrugged your shoulders as a response, the mere mention of the previous night was enough to deflate your already souring mood.
"Don't give me that look, Y/N! I know you and Yoongi got it on last night!" Taehyung flailed his arms accusingly, as if waddling around would make his statements true. "We didn't get it on, Taehyung. Literally nothing happened. Nothing." You tried to remain calm as you spoke, but your patience was running thin.
"Oh come on Y/N. Yoongi was absolutely plastered this morning and you're gonna try to tell me nothing happened?" He kept on going as he shook your shoulders, and it took everything in you to not slap his hands away.
"Did he get home safe last night?" Your brows furrowed in slight worry at the mention of Yoongi being wasted, and no matter how hurt you were, you had to know if he was okay.
"Uh, yeah. Were you drunk too? I thought you guys left together. Do you not remember?" The lump in your throat was becoming harder to swallow down as Taehyung spoke. You had to be strong. You were not gonna cry over this to your poor friend who's excited.
"You know I don't drink. And, no we didn't leave together. I asked Namjoon to take me home." You hoped he'd stop asking questions, but much to your dismay- "You left with Namjoon?!?! Does Yoongi know?!?!? Did anything happen with him!?" At this point you were on the brink of tears, you hated talking about this.
"Taehyung, please let it go. I just wanted to know if Yoongi got home safely. Can we please just drop it?" Taehyung caught onto your pleading tone and the hurt look in your eyes, and he nodded with his softened expression.
"Sorry Y/N, I didn't mean to pry." He spoke cautiously. "It's okay Tae."
He shot you another worried look before returning to walking in silence beside you once again.
The rest of the day went painfully slow, your mind too exhausted to deal with walking from one side of campus to the other, and much less to pay attention to what your professors were saying.
Expectedly, you collapsed onto your bed the moment you went back to your dorm. You were gladly going to continue feeling sorry for yourself, but the ringing of your doorbell rudely interrupted you.
You groaned, hoping they'd just go away, but after a few seconds another ring came. You [grumpily] got up, running your hands through your hair in attempt to look somewhat presentable.
As you made your way to the door, you wondered who could be at your apartment, especially now that it was beginning to get late, the sun going down quickly outside.
You hesitantly opened the door, immediately wishing you would've just continued to ignore whoever was at the door once you saw who was standing in front of you.
"Hi, I brought dinner." There Yoongi stood with a soft smile on his face, lifting a brown bag in reference to dinner.
You stood stunned, wanting to say something, but your mind went blank.
"Y/N? You there?" He playfully waved his hands around trying to get your attention.
"Oh, uhm, yeah. Sorry. Just didn't expect you to come by."
"Oh, sorry if I startled you. I texted you but you didn't respond, and you didn't answer last night when I called, so I wanted to come check if you were okay." He shuffled from foot to foot, worry evident in his eyes.
"Oh, just haven't been on my phone lately." You looked down, feeling unsure on how to talk to him without showing him your hurt.
"Oh alright. So, we heading in for dinner?" The smile returned to Yoongi's face, and no matter how hurt you were, you still found it hard to say no to him.
"Oh, yeah, sure. Of course."
You opened the door a little further and stepped aside to let him in.
On a normal occasion, dinner with Yoongi would've been the highlight of your day. But now, it was filled with awkward silence and poor attempts at small talk — Yoongi hates small talk as much as you, so you don't know why he's still trying — the tension in the air was hardly going unnoticed.
It wasn't until you finished eating that he decided to just rip the bandage off.
"Are you angry with me?" Yoongi asked, and you almost questioned if he was being serious or not, but the expression he held made you realize that he was in fact clueless about the hurt he put you through.
You weren't sure what to say, so you stayed silent. I mean, it's not like you were angry at him. But you also weren't too happy with him either. Yoongi felt his heart drop as your gaze dropped his own, denying him from an answer.
"Y/N? Did I do something?" He asks from across the table where he's sitting.
For some reason hearing those words from him made the tears you've been holding back so well spill over.
Did he really have no idea? Were you genuinely overreacting? Did you just make everything up in your head?
"Do you really not know?" You tried to push your voice out firmly, but it came out in a broken whisper. You wanted to look at Yoongi, you wanted to see if his face washed over with realization, but your eyes stayed glued to the floor.
"Is this about me getting drunk at that party? I thought you said you didn't mind if I had alcohol." His wording sounded harsher than he intended, but with your already weakened state, you had to hold back from full on sobbing right there in front of him.
"This is about you leaving me by myself in the middle of the party when you promised you wouldn't leave my side!" Your frustration began to take over, did he really not see it? He's supposed to know you better than anyone else.
"Leaving you by yourself? Last thing I heard, you had found yourself a new companion for the night." Yoongi scoffed, his mood souring when he recalls finding out that apparently you'd left with some other guy.
The drinks he'd had were enough to make the night slightly blurry and to make him work a little harder to recall the night's events, but unfortunately, they weren't enough to make him forget how someone had stole you away from him.
"Where did you hear that?" You asked, trying to mask the hurt you were currently feeling.
"My friends" He responded, as if that was supposed to change what you had said.
"Your friends ... the ones you introduced me to?"
"Yeah"
"Your friends really don't seem to like me." You muttered, but Yoongi somehow caught the soft mumbling.
"What do you mean? To me it looked like they were all happy to meet you." His tone remained cold, and you felt more tears forming quickly.
"Well, you weren't there with me when they all laughed at me because I'd lost you in the crowd." You tried to defend yourself.
"They're not like that, I know they aren't."
"You wouldn't know how they acted towards me because you left me alone." You continued on, his face morphing into one resembling more of guilt.
"He left you already? Didn't even last half an hour."
"They haven't even had 1 drink tonight, no wonder Yoongi ran away so fast. Prude."
You winced while recalling how they'd laughed at you when you tried asking for Yoongi, passing it off as a joke when you'd gotten visibly upset.
You softened your tone, sadness catching up with you and replacing your frustration.
"It hurt, Yoongi. You know me better than anyone. You're supposed to know me better than anyone. You know how much I hate parties and bars, how I hate talking to people I don't know, how I don't do things alone. Ever. And you know that if I made you promise to not leave my side it's because I'm not ever planning to leave yours either. Do you know how bad it hurt to be panicking only to turn around and see you having the time of your life? Especially with someone else, when you promised me that night was for you and I only? It hurt, so damn bad."
Yoongi's heart dropped at your words, had it really been that bad for you? How did he not notice?
"I didn't leave with anyone yesterday, Namjoon brought me back to my apartment and left the moment I walked inside that door. You're the one that left with someone else last night, and it wasn't me."
A thick moment of silence engulfs you, and you begin to wait for a snap, or some sort of outburst from Yoongi, but all that comes is—
"Y/N... I- Shit. That's not-" You looked up hesitantly at the sound of Yoongi fumbling his words. He ran a hand through his hair in disbelief before slowly moving closer and crouching down in front of you. "I'm so sorry Y/N. I swear didn't mean to leave you. I went to go get the drinks, I did. And then when I couldn't find you I went and asked my friends if they had seen you, and they said that you'd gone off dancing with some guy, and so I went to go look for you and I ran into a classmate, which is the girl you saw me with. And I thought, since Y/N's off with someone else, it wouldn't hurt to have a drink with a girl from my class. I wouldn't have left you if I knew that you were by yourself. I'm so sorry."
Yoongi's gaze dropped to the floor as he finished, ashamed for being the root of your tears.
"I should've known better, I- I was just so opposed to seeing you happy with someone else that I immediately rejected the idea of looking for you to avoid the possibility of someone else making your night special. And I know that's not really a valid excuse, not looking for you because I was jealous- of something that wasn't even fucking happening- it isn't fair to you whatsoever. I'm so sorry, Y/N. I truly am." He takes your hands in his and takes a moment to recollect his next words.
"What can I do to make it up to you? Even if it's just the smallest fraction, I want to show you how sorry I am. Anything you want. Please." You paused for a moment, even though your conscience immediately knew what you wanted.
Hold me. Please. Hold me. Nudge your head with mine, lock our pinkies, put your leg against mine, anything. Please, hold me.
With your brain screaming mantras of 'I need to be held', you reached out for him for a second, before your body jerked to a stop.
No. I need him to hold me. I need him to reach out. He needs to initiate- please-
Yoongi's quick to notice your body language, and equally quick to react. "Do you want to be held, sweetheart?" You swear you felt yourself physically start to glow at the sound of him uttering the words you've been dying to hear for god knows how long.
You nod your head and you're so delighted by the aspect of someone- well, not just someone, but Yoongi- comforting you, that you don't even notice the soft whimper that leaves you as he scoots closer to you.
"Words, darling." He says softly, and your body automatically responds with soft chants of "Yes, please, yes Yoongi."
You don't even notice how tears begin to fall against your cheeks again when you feel Yoongi's hands wiping them away.
"C'mere, I've got you baby. Let's go to bed, yeah?" He grabs your legs and wraps them around his torso, before he holds you against him tightly and begins to stand up with you in his arms.
You feel yourself melting at the pet names he's giving you, glad that he's carrying you because you're sure your legs would've given out on you at this point.
You continue turning to mush when you feel how gently Yoongi sets you down once you reach your bed, how he squeezes your hand and asks for permission to lay with you with his eyes, how he reaches for you under the covers and cradles you close, fingers running through your hair softly.
The bliss is only momentarily, broken when your mouth moves faster than your brain;
"Yoongi?"
"Hm?"
"Why did it upset you when you thought I was at the club with someone else?" Your question comes out as a whisper, scared for his response.
"Y/N." He pulls back a little to see your face.
"Yoongi." You reply mocking his tone.
"Are you really gonna make me spell it out for you?" He's secretly glad that it's dark in your room, otherwise you'd be able to see the blush coating his cheeks.
"What are you talking about?" You ask, and his only response is a huff while pulling your head back into his chest.
"Yoooongiiii" Your whine comes out muffled by his shirt.
"Y/nnnnnn" It's now Yoongi's turn to mock your tone.
"Answer the questionnnn"
You feel the vibrations of his chest as he mumbles something into your hair, and you would've lost it on the spot if you weren't so focused on getting an answer out of him.
"Yoongi I can't understand you when you're mumbling like a child." You chuckle slightly, not wanting to dwell on how you can feel his heart beating rapidly against you before he mumbles once again, only this time louder.
"I don't understand you for shit." At this, Yoongi lets go of you and sits up with a sigh, looking at you for a second before securing his gaze on his hands. You follow suit and sit up as well, only slightly behind him.
"I like you. I've liked you. For a really long while." His voice is so soft and it sounds so timid, you almost think you're imagining it.
"Oh."
"Oh?"
"Wait- that's not a good way to respond to that. Uhhh- wait." You quickly shift so you're facing him fully.
"Do you mean like as in 'you're a homie' or like as in 'you're not just the homie you're THE homie'? Because before I say anything you would have to clari-"
"Do you think I do this with all my friends?" He cuts off your nervous ramble, grabbing both of your shaky hands with his equally shaken ones.
"What specifically?"
"All of it."
"Wha-"
"The sharing food? The holding hands and carrying you and bringing dinner over and inviting them everywhere with me? The cuddling and the 'baby' and 'doll'? You know how I am about my personal space, and you know how I am about my sleep, and you know how I am about affection. Do you think I do that with just anyone?"
"Well- I don't know, I mean- I don't know what your other friendsh-"
"I don't. You're the only one that gets to see me like this. You're the only one I treat like this. You're the only one I want to treat like this. I like you. And I want to be with you. And that's why I was upset. Because when I thought you were with someone else, it made me feel as if you didn't want the same thing as me."
Before you got the chance to even begin to process, Yoongi catches himself and feels the need to justify: "Obviously if you don't feel the same then I won't like, lash out at you or anything, it'll hurt but I don't want you to feel forced into something more with me than what we have now, it's just you asked me why I was upset and that was the only way I could explain it but I-"
"Yoongi." He's stopped by a soft tug to his shirt and the even softer sound of your voice.
You catch each other's eyes, the flickers of hope and longing between them, and the search of honesty.
"I feel the same."
A sigh leaves his lips and he breaks into a smile before picking you up in one motion and setting you on his lap so you're straddling him.
"Does this mean we're like, um- like,,,,"
"Like...?" His tone is teasing, and you know he knows what you mean.
"Like, y'know- like..."
"I actually don't know...."
"Yoongi." You huff out, your shyness getting the best of you.
"Yes?" His tone is smug, making you groan into his chest.
Working off of pure adrenaline, you mumble quietly: "Like, together."
"What was that doll?" You could practically hear the smirk on his face, making you try and shuffle away from him, but Yoongi's quicker, pulling you back into him with a giggle.
"If you're asking if we're officially dating, then don't even question it baby." He's still laughing, but his tone is firmer this time.
"So I'm taking that as a yes?"
"Fuck yes."
You burst out laughing at his response, and soon enough you've both fallen into a fit of giggles, as well as back into the bed, with you on top of Yoongi, before he flips you over so he's hovering over you.
"Y/N."
"Yoongi?"
"Can I kiss you?"
End.
921 notes · View notes
queenbees21 · 1 year
Text
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Day one — ʀᴇᴅ: ᴠɪʟʟᴀɪɴ ᴅᴇᴋᴜ; ᴍʏ oɹǝɥ ᴠɪʟʟᴀɪɴ ᴀᴄᴀᴅᴇᴍɪᴀ
Here’s the list prompts <3 ᴘᴀꜱꜱɪᴏɴ : ❤︎ , ᴘᴏꜱꜱᴇꜱꜱɪᴏɴ : ★?
Villain Deku chooses! ➢ ★
⚠️Warning! : Grammar errors, Not proofread, Yandere deku, Ooc Deku, pervy! + possessive Deku, kidnapping - slight dark content - READ AT YOUR OWN RISK
A/n : these little prompts might be a little short, but I’ll try to make them last longer! 🙇‍♀️
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[February 12, 2023 __ 11:45 PM ]
“Alright, I heading out now!” You called out to your co-worker. They waves their hand goodbye with a “Safe travels,” as they processed to clean the countertops of the bar.
You head out the door of the club; swinging it open and walked down the hall while tracking your bus. As you waited for its arrival, you hadn’t noticed two pairs of emerald orbs watching you.
[February 12, 2023 __ 11:56 PM ]
You, softy, closed your door to your apartment complex while shrugging off your coat. You place it in the coat rack and walk to your dark kitchen. Throwing your keys on the island and switching on the light, although; as you did, you didn’t notice the company that was making it—himself comfortable in your chair. “Welcome home precious girl~”
You shudder in fear but kept your brave face on, “what are you doing here.” You mostly stated and then asked a general question��
He chuckled playfully but it sounded dark from afar, he place his foot down for he had it across his leg, stood up; walking towards you. You suddenly felt small compared to him and, as always he wasn’t giving you any personal space; whatsoever.
He gazes down at you with an unreadable expression. He just stood close doing nothing, no sudden movements were made. You gasped in surprise as he swiftly pulls you close to him and lifts you, throwing you over his shoulder.
You felt your face heating up and tried to kick your way out of his arms. He struggles to handle you, as you kicked and tried to punch your way out of his grasp, although; that soon stopped when you suddenly felt a smack against your thigh.
Now you are pissed off and at the same time flushed. You curse Deku out in your native language and still processed to smack and kick him in his back, and again it did nothing to prevent him from holding you still.
You suddenly felt the fresh breeze of the wind of the night and heard the slam of a door, ‘He’s kidnapping me!!’
Deku again opens another door and throws you in the passenger seat of a car, as he struggles to put on your seatbelt.“Help Me! he-mph!!” He covers your mouth and swiftly closes the door preventing you from escaping. Before he left, he turned on the cars AC. As you try to open it, it only made a taping sound…. ‘Child lock’.
He somehow managed to get the door to close and looks towards your… co-worker! at the bar!! They both talked for a little while, you only heard mumbling. Their noises drifted off, you heard nothing... Deku paid the said co-worker and shooed them away.
….. Then realization came crashing down…Your co-worker… It’s no wonder now, how Deku found out where you lived; it’s simple really. Your so-called “loyal” co-worker, rat you out and yet in the end he’ll be the one to get punished...
Deku hates tattletales…
But before you can think of anymore about this hectic situation. You suddenly felt dizzy, tired, and can feel an incoming headache arrive- wait.…
The.. air… AC…
Dame it…
[February 13, 2023 __ 1:30 PM ]
Red
Red is… I see red…
All I see is.. red
But revenge is best served… cold
“ Aw Baby girl no need to worry about me~ it’s just a little paint~” he once said
___
You wake up with chills running down your spine. You panted in fear, quickly you stood up from the bed. Wait? bed? You hastily looked around; trying to remember where you were.
Air..
Of course, Deku must have put chloroform in the AC! That’s dame bastard! dame him and his clever schemes! You wanted to bang your head for not thinking straight or even way around that situation.
As you were contemplating with yourself, you hadn’t noticed a certain presence; watching think to yourself. He smirks, but how can he not? When he has a beautiful angel in his bed.
“Good morning Precious~ or should I say afternoon instead,”
Oh my goodness, No.
“Stopping calling me that! And no it’s not a good morning or afternoon or whatever is it!” You slipped your legs off the comfort of the warm bed and met the cool air, breezing your exposed legs.
“It’s afternoon baby,”
“Whatever!” You huffed, crossing your arms and turning your head to the side. As you did Deku just gazes at the soft skin of your neck, and without thinking he leans towards your neck peppering kisses down your neck. You felt your cheeks heat up at the sudden contact, feeling your eyes get slightly droopy and you breathed out a shaky sigh.
You tried your best, not to let any sort of noises that might make him feel ‘accomplished’. Well rather it was noise or whatever, if he was able to get you to squirm a little then he’s done his job right.
Deku hums against your neck as he pulls you close to his body. He slowly but surely, wrapped his arms around your waist; bringing you close and sitting on his lap.
He felt warm against you. You slowly wrap your arms around his muscular frame. Or at least tried to, for the palm of your hands reaches up to his spin; trying hard not to fall; although, Deku has  prevented that from happening.
He held you with caution, and for a spilt second, it almost felt like he cared but, it was only for a mere moment.
For some reason, in the back of your head; you knew this was wrong. You knew you had to stop but you couldn’t, you knew you had to let go, although; he didn’t let you. You knew and yet neither one of you, not even for a mere moment, let go of one other.
There is no guarantee that you might one day, up run and leave Deku again, like last time. From now on he’ll make sure you never leave. He’ll make you, that you only look at him, seek Him, love him, and no one else. He’ll make sure of it.
As you both pull away for a breath, you panting for air. Deku places his forehead against yours as he rubs his nose with your own. He smirks at your flushed features, and he quickly kisses you once more but pulls away just quickly before he loses it again.
Red is what he sees in both your futures, although; it won’t be red of the drips of blood; within the palm of his hands, the blood of his enemies.
No, it’ll be the red roses in the garden, with you dressed in white. With the red rose on the crown of your hair. Ready to be wed, and red petals placed everywhere on the bed only. Yes. Thats the red he’ll be looking forward to.
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A/n: Sorry if it’s short! And weird 💀 but I thought this was cute (kinda) and it’s been on my mind for a while, and I couldn’t figure out how to end this without leaving it in a awkward position… But with that being said,
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chronicbeans · 6 months
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I need more fluffy Simon Petrikov x Reader angst turn fluffy comfort fics NOW or else I will do it myself.
This is a threat because I am not confident in my ability to write fluff.
But I will if I must lol
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sarahrogersevans · 4 months
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Looking Out For My Sister- Clint Barton sister!xreader comfort fic feat. Steve Rogers and Natasha Romanoff
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Summary: Clint comforting Y/N during a rough time
Warnings: fluff, angst, comfort fluff, mentions of mental health struggles a bit if you squint
~Y/N’s Pov~
It was a slow week at the compound and I decided to rest in my room for a little while and as I went to lay in bed I saw Clint outside shooting his arrows doing target practice and as I watched him my mind wandered and I fell asleep on my bed. A few hours later I felt a hand rub my back and I opened my eyes and I saw Clint smiling at me and I tried to cover my face with the blanket and Clint chuckled while rubbing my back gently and said “hey Y/N sweetheart you missed dinner, you doing ok? You’ve been pretty quiet lately.. I’m worried hun.”
I listened to what Clint said and my eyes filled with tears and I cried softly and Clint came to lay beside me and I felt him stroke my hair and he held me close. “I’m having a rough week Clint.. I don’t know how to explain it..” Clint kissed my forehead gently and said “hey it’s ok Y/N everyone has moments like that but you don’t have have to go through it alone alright? But you do need to eat something, so how about I go warm you up some dinner and we can watch your favorite movie since we don’t have any missions today, deal?” I smiled and I nodded my head “That sounds good Clint thank you.” Clint got up and went to the kitchen to go make food and I set up a movie for us to watch and then I got back in my bed to lay down. My thoughts started to become overwhelming and I grabbed my phone to put on some ambience music and I felt relaxed and I closed my eyes just a bit to rest.
A few minutes later while I was waiting for Clint to come back my mind started to wander again and I tried to listen to my favorite song but even that made me cry and I felt so stupid for crying, “I hope Clint will be back soon..” I said to myself as I tried to calm down a bit.
Natasha heard me crying and she came in the room and sat on the edge of my bed and said “hey baby girl you ok?.. I heard you crying and I got worried, what’s bothering you?” I shrugged and said “just feeling pretty overwhelmed..” I saw Nat come sit by me and I hugged her tight and as soon as she comforted me I felt more relaxed. Nat said “hey I gotta go help tony with something will you be ok Y/N?” I nodded my head and said “yea I’ll be alright thanks for coming to checking on me Nat love ya sis.” She smiled back at me before leaving and said “love you too little chick.”
~Clint’s POV~
I was in the kitchen warming up Y/N some of the dinner and I made her favorite dessert I know she loves and after I finished putting that together I started heading back to her room and on my way back I saw Steve Rogers walk by and I nodded and said “hey cap.” Steve nodded and said “hey Clint, I haven’t seen Y/N at training the last day or so is she ok?” I sighed and said “yea she’s just going through a rough time but she’s ok cap I’ve got things handled I’ll let you know how things go.” We shook hands and then I got to Y/N’s room and I set down her food on the table and I kneeled down by her side of the bed and saw she was sleeping again and I caressed her hair gently and I smiled at her and whispered to her “hey my little hawk.. wake up, I’ve got your dinner here for you.” She opened her eyes and looked at the food and she stretched a bit and sat up. “Hey Clint.. sorry I was sleepy again..” she said softly and I kissed her head and said “hey it’s ok you needed it, how are you feeling now?” She smiled and shrugged “I’m ok though I’m pretty hungry oh and I set up a movie for us to watch if you still want to watch it tonight?” I got excited and handed her the food and said “yea of course Y/N! Which movie is it?” I helped Y/N to get comfy by me while she ate and I waited for her to tell me which movie she picked. I saw Y/N grab a dvd box and she said “Lilo and Stitch if that’s ok? Disney movies cheer me up.” I rubbed her back gently and I smiled at her and said “hey I love Disney movies, that’s a good one to watch I’ll get it started while you eat ok?” I pushed play on the movie and I cuddled up next to Y/N as I watched over her and I noticed she finished eating and halfway into the movie I saw she fell asleep on my shoulder and I put my arm around her protectively letting her rest and I smiled knowing she was feeling relaxed and I whispered to her “goodnight kid sweet dreams.”
Hey lovelies!! I hope you like this comfort fic xx♥️🤗 I’m back!!
Tags list
@melaclintbartoncorner
@ginabaker1666
@clintbartonslover
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proudahgase-exol · 5 months
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Next projects on my drafts……
Okay so I have so many fics in my drafts that I’m halfway done and I don’t know if I should post them
Here are some of them if you interested
1. Friend and nothing else right?
Junmyeon x reader ( smut, fluff )
Summary: your friends with Junmyeon since you were kids now that you guys are adults you guys are inseparable but you don’t act like friends do…… friends don’t hold hands when you go out, friends don’t give forehead kisses, friends don’t go on dates every two weeks, friends don’t have sex on a Sunday after a night for a party with your other friends do they?
2. Family
Jackson wang x reader (fluff)
Summary: you've been dating for five years and married for one and now you’re both ready to start a family.
3. Take it back
taehyung x reader (angst , fluff)
Summary: Your Tae’s fake girlfriend you have been fake dating for two months and he only asked you to be in this because of his ex now you have fallen in love with him when you guys get in a fight you say things you didn’t mean to.
4. Sehun’s best friend
Junmyeon x reader (fluff)
Summary: Sehun cries over the fact that his leaving for the military service and will be leaving his baby sister behind he makes her stay at the house he and Junmyeon share and he soon finds out a little secret his sister and Junmyeon have.
5. I love you not her
Kai x reader (angst, fluff, smut )
Summary: Kai and you were co-workers working under Kim Enterprises owned by Kim Junmyeon you guys were good friends but one thing lead to another and ended up in bed now that became a regular thing but the problem was he was a married man and you new it but that didn’t stopped you from fucking each other.
6. My pretty girl
Hyunjin x plus size reader
Summary: your Stray Kids makeup artist you are close to the boys but mostly Felix and Changbin they both know you have a massive crush on Hyunjin and they try to help you but you think he doesn’t like you like that and you feel like he will never like a girl that looks like you.
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xmymelosmile · 3 months
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While I was watching a film, I got an idea for Isward angst/fluff.
if I go exactly based on the film, it's suppose to be Edward cheating on Isaac but I had enough angst from the movie itself so I made it into fluff.
ahem
----------------------------------------
It's been 2 weeks since Isaac and Edward got together. They had few fights but nothing serious, mostly abt Isaac's routines.
They have a pretty good going relationship for now. Until Isaac and Chris got in a little fight, ( He tried sharing how he felt about Chris being with Nevin since Error suggested that it would be good to tell him what he feels towards the whole thing ) and Drew wasn't at school today.
After this whole thing, Isaac had to deal with Edward's fan girls. Ink tried ignoring them at first since his day wasn't going well anyway. One of the girls said "Do you really think Edward loves you? You are just another one of his partners!"
That made Isaac snaps because it went too far. "DONT you dare calling me that!" he pushed the girl so he can get out of there ASAP.
The artist went to Edward, who was talking with his cronies "Hey knife nerd!" Cody greeted him. Isaac just cling his fingers into Edward's hand which made him confused but held it back anyway.
After few seconds he recognized the sign Isaac was giving him "Hey uh, me and Isaac are going to be late for the next class, so we will go." and like that he excused himself from further conversations.
While they were walking, Edward turned his head to Isaac and asked. "Do you want to go somewhere more private?" It took few seconds to answer but Isaac nobbed.
Ed brought them to the lair and locked the door so no one could disturb them.
They sat on one of the bean bags and Ink snuggled into the taller embrace. "Are you okay? Did something happen?"
"I'm fine, I just want to spend some time with you..." Edward understood he didn't want to talk. Maybe guessed that the exchanging between him and Chris didn't end well. "Do you need something?"
He cling into him more and Isaac kissed him on the cheek which sent Edward in complete blush mess but he returned it soon after, on the lips. "No, just this."
"I love you."
"I love you too."
( they skipped the last class and went straight to Isaac's place to cuddle more. )
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cinaiel · 11 months
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Am i the only one obsessed with angst to fluff typa shit?? LIKE IT ALWAYS GETS ME, i love angst but im not really into sad endings, but at the same time i do, but i dont. I js prefer angst with comfort/fluff but ig it depends on the story (my beloved writers pls write more angst to fluff mwhehe)
I DO NOT CARE WHAT FANDOMITIS!!! AS LONG AS ITS ANGST TO FLUFF PLSZ HSJA RECOMMEND SOME WRITERS WHO WRITES ANGST TO FLUFF I'm desperate and this is the only thing that can make me sleep (i get sleepy when i read lol)
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wolfstargazer · 4 months
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Dec 3 - Drink - @wolfstarmicrofic - word count: 272
Sirius did not own matching glasses. After some time rummaging through the sideboard, he had finally returned to the table with one cut glass tumbler and a blue-rimmed, chipped cup.
He uncorked the bottle with a wet pop, poured two generous measures, and weighed up which drink it was more polite to give his friend.
Remus made the decision easy for him and took the cup.
Sirius smiled crookedly, picked up his glass and brought it to his lips.
"So what are we drinking to?" he asked.
Remus thought for a moment. He wasn't very good at making toasts. But Sirius was waiting.
"How about to old friends?"
Sirius looked thoughtful and rolled the glass in his hands.
"Hmmm...how about..." Sirius trailed off. He cocked an eyebrow and smiled ever so slightly. "...to old friends and new lovers?"
Remus felt himself flush. He told himself it was the heady scent of the alcohol from the cup before him. Sirius was teasing; making reference to some recent conquest no doubt that only James knew about. Perhaps it was the curvy, dark-eyed witch that Remus had noted lingered just a little after everyone else had left the meetings of the Order, often with a question or two that only Sirius could answer.
"Well, Mister Moony?" Sirius asked. His grey eyes hadn't left Remus' face since he'd suggested the toast. "What's it to be?"
Remus picked up his cup. He held his friends gaze. A moment passed and then -
"To old friends and new lovers," Remus said playfully, taking a sip.
Sirius laughed sharply, raised his glass in a toast and downed his drink.
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yarrystyleeza · 26 days
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Arduous Solitude
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"I used to want to be alone. Now that you're here—I don't want to be alone anymore. The solitude that I once wanted took no place in my heart ever since I had you."
[series masterlist / main masterlist]
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Taglist: @mattmurdocks6thscaleapartment @bellaxgiornata @babygirlmurdock @1988-fiend @v4leoftears @galaxies-and-moons-and-cox @floral-charlie-cat
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[curiosity almost killed the cat]
Word count: 1.7k!
Warnings/tags for this chapter: none!!! Talks of art, cats, and tea. Someone gets a burn scar!!! other than that—there's nothing.
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You looked even more interesting this close.
You eyed him curiously with high eyebrows— waiting for him to speak. He cleared his throat, flashing a smile. "Welcome to the neighborhood," he states, his voice was gravely but it was warm, even soothing. Eerly soothing.
It wasn't really matching his face, he was handsome, you couldn't doubt that for a split second, but he was a bit perturbing. He had a weird aura, maybe off-putting too, but he looked nice. Very nice.
Stop that, you literally just met the man. You mentally shook your head.
"Thank you, mister..." you stopped, waiting for him to finish your sentence.
"Henry," he said, "my name is Henry," he smiled once again.
You nodded, "pleasure to meet you, Mister Henry."
You introduce yourself. "Such a lovely name," he says, and you feel the blood creeping up beneath your skin.
"I apologize—it seemed like you were having a lonely time," he says.
You shook your head, almost instantly, "no worries, you didn't bother."
Why did you say that? Why did you sound so eager and... desperate? In your head, you smacked yourself across the face.
"Oh, um--" he trailed off.
You gasped. "Oh, I'm very sorry-- please come in," you swing the door wider, allowing him to pass inside. He took off his dark fedota and wiped his shoes at the entrance mat. He wasn't this 6ft tall huge—but he was huge, with broad shoulders and a wide dorsum. You felt a little small next to him, maybe more than just a little.
You show him the way into your living room, moving your cozy blankets out of the way for him to sit on your sofa. He gently settled down, eyeing the interior of your house thoroughly. Did he like the decor? Wait--why would you even care? It's your house, not his.
"Sorry again, let me go grab something for you to drink, you must be freezing," you say, turning in your heels and walking straight to the kitchen. He called your name. It pinned you in place.
You never liked how your name sounded more than now.
"Don't bother bringing anything, I don't really need--"
You turned, shaking your head, "that would be very impolite of me, Mister Henry, now allow me to bring you some tea to warm you up."
He surrendered with a huff, "alright," he quietly said. You continued your trip to the kitchen and placed the teapot over the stove.
"Would you like chamomile tea? Hibiscus? Earl Grey? The regular?" you asked as you scavenged through the cupboard for other options.
"Whatever you have there," Henry politely answered.
"Alright, I think we're up for hibiscus."
He stood off his seat to closely inspect your bookshelves. The last residents of this home were an elderly couple, so there's a chance he learns something new about the world from your perspective.
You seemed to be a bookworm, there were dozens and dozens of books on your shelves. He noticed you had a shared interest with him, too; miniature artworks. You loved to collect them, but he loved making them.
He wondered if any of his many miniature works ever made their way to your hands, maybe passed by someone to you, or you received it as a gift, or thrifted it from some local antiques store.
But then he saw the very petite canvas of a peacock. He remembers that, he just doesn't quite remember when, but he surely knows he painted it more than 250 years ago.
"Oh, you seem like you like my collection?" you cringed at yourself. Since when were you this outgoing and social?
You placed the tray down. "I'm sorry, I was just--" he trailed off, turning to look your way with your little art piece in his hand.
You shook your head, "it's alright, I got this one in an auction three years ago for only fifteen hundred pounds! It should've costed way more than that to be honest, it dates back to the seventeen hundreds, as I assume," you were astonished by how talkative you are now. Maybe you were just too excited about your miniature collection.
But he admired how dedicated you were to track it back to its date of manufacturing, and you paid this much for it and still had the will to pay more.
He couldn't help but smile.
"What fascinated you about it?" the artist had to ask.
You shrugged, "well... I guess I like ancient things, specially art," a warmer smile split the pitch darkness of his beard, "the size is enough to amaze you, and the artist was so dedicated in painting the blue feathers, I love it when someone pours their soul into something, it creates something magnificent."
"Are you an artist?" he asked, you nodded, gesturing at the wall behind the sofa. He turned around, his back now facing you, but you could swear you heard him quietly gasp.
"You made these?" he turned to look at you, his brows shooting up his forehead. You hummed, he looked back at the pieces you hung on the wall, moved closer to them, he inspected them, touched them even.
You've never seen a man this mesmerized by your art. All of your previous partners usually plainly reacted to it, other times they never even batted an eye for it.
But him, Mister Henry, he was in awe, his tips were following the wild and free strokes of your brushes, they walked over the ups and downs of the layers, and sensed the pebbles of dry paint so delicately, his fingertips almost dancing over the canvas.
That stirred something in you.
"Are you an artist?" it was your turn to ask this question, he turned to face you, his fingertips still lingering on the canvas. Your eyes shifted between his and his tips, still amazed by the fact that he was interested in your art.
"You can say that," he shrugged and winked.
This, somehow, changed the flow direction of the chemicals of your brain. The lights flipped on inside your head. Your face turns red.
You had no idea what was going on with you, but this was the most attractive thing you've seen a guy doing in years.
Not only he's interested in art, but he's also an artist.
You had to distract yourself from looking into his vast eyes with this unlimited amount of admiration. "The--the tea!" you ripped your eyes off of him, looking at the tray placed on the coffee table.
He hadn't drank tea in decades and never truly minded it, but now he wanted to drink it with you, he felt he missed what it tastes.
He was almost to grab his cup, but something buzzed the skin of his hand, and that's when he noticed that the tray was made of silver.
He almost killed himself for a cup of tea.
You reached down and handed him the cup, he nodded, his face was paler than a sheet, but he smiled to distract himself from the fact that he almost died in a stranger's house... For a little cup of tea.
He felt stupid for this.
"Can I ask you a question, if you wouldn't mind?" he said after taking a sip of his drink. He sure missed that warm and earthy and sweet taste.
You nodded.
"You seem to look like a city girl, what brought you here to the suburbs, in a house near the woods?" Henry is obviously more curious now.
You shrugged, "I needed to be alone, to breathe, and this is what I found, my very own little witch house," he chuckled at your answer, and you couldn't lie, you loved that man's chuckle, you fell in love with it.
It wasn't just because it's been a while since you had a man in your life, but he had something so charming and elegant about him. His fancy clothing, his wizardly attitude, his very sweet but dignified features and, his eyes.
You really, really loved his eyes.
There was an odd reflection of fire in them that you couldn't explain, you didn't know if he was born this way or was it the fireplace behind you or is your mind playing tricks on you.
Marmalade yelled from upstairs, it made your heart drop in your stomach, tearing your train of thoughts apart and shaking your ground. Although you've had this flameball for years now, you never really got used to his sudden loud shrieks; they always took you off guard.
Henry's ears visibly stood up, he caught the scent of fur and canned food, and watched as the little noise machine waddled down the stairs.
"That's Marmalade," you had to say—as you pulled him up to your chest.
"Hey Lad," Henry says, smiles and waves at him.
"He loves to let me know he's present, sorry if he scared you," you lull Marmalade in your cradle-made arms.
Henry gutted a giggle and shook his head, "never mind, he's adorable."
However, Marmalade's ears went into airplane-mode, he pushed you in the chest, forcing you to let go of him and ran up the stairs once again. You were astounded by his act, you turn back to look at Henry, who stood silently with his eyebrows shooting high and his eyes fixed to the ground.
"I'm really sorry, I don't know what's going on with him, maybe it's because he just moved in--" you were explaining, and you don't even know why you were justifying a cat but you stood there and did it.
Henry shook his head, "it's alright I'm... I'm not very favored by most animals," he shrugged, "however, I think I should be going now, I must've kept you past your bedtime and maybe it's why your lad was grumpy," he put on his fedora and passed you.
You were a little startled by the shift of his demeanor, but you followed him to the front door.
He turned the doorknob then turned to look at you. Quietly, he said your name with a smile, "it was a pleasure to meet you."
But this wasn't the last thing you saw of the very peculiar Mister Henry.
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[previous / next]
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riverbutghost · 5 months
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I just saw this and omg!! Had to write about it!! slight nsfw!! Please request some angsty drabbles!!
Simon’s hands wandered around your body, mouth still covered with yours.
“Take it off,”
He mumbled after giving your neck a one last kiss, and your heart started pounding. You hesitated for a few seconds and Simon raised his eyebrows.
“What’s wrong, pretty?”
You just sighed and took your shirt off, revealing your bare chest.
Simon sucked in breath after seeing your nipples. You had pierced them, with his fucking initials.
He swallowed and took the initial in his fingers.
“Fuck..”
He mumbled, mouth watering at the sight. In a swift motion, he grabbed your hips and pulled you on his lap. With a lip bite, you started dry humping him while he was playing with your nipples.
“wanted to show me that you’re mine, huh?”
You nodded with a whimper, feeling his cock twitch in his pants.
“My girl, I love them.”
You giggled, which turned into a high pitched moan after his mouth latched on to your nipple with the initial R.
“Fuck, gonna make me delirious sweet girl.”
-
P.s: My friends bullied me for liking nipple piercings-
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starsofmilos · 2 years
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Leaving (Adrian Chase x reader)
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Request: Can I request a Vigilante x reader where the reader and Adrian are dating but he acts differently around Chris and it upsets you bc your sweet boyfriend is being an asshole? + mention of past threesomes they've had (Before meeting the reader) that causes a misunderstanding? I love your writing!
Request: hii! i love your writing sm and i was wondering if i could request an adrian chase fic with miscommunication trope and lotsss of angst. that’s super vague but i’d be happy with anything bc ur writing slaps. ty 💗💗
Okay!! I hope y’all like what I’ve made!
Masterlist
Warning: mentions of sex, makeout session, angst, cursing, misunderstanding, mentions of cheating, happy ending
You believed you weren’t meant to be in relationships.
It was weird to think that you knew it was. It’s just no matter what you had done in your life. You remained alone.
You were always alone. Your family hardly reached out and every relationship you had been in had been a fail. 
Your first boyfriend had cheated on you. It hurt, but at the end of it you became a better person.
Your second boyfriend had only wanted one thing from you. You didn’t let him. 
Your third boyfriend well he wasn’t bad. He was kind and you had ended it with him because he discovered he didn’t like girls like he thought he did. You respected that.
All these made you believe you were probably meant to be alone. Relationships just weren’t your thing.
It was hard to find someone who truly cared for you. You were always the first to fall first and when you did you fell hard. 
In every relationship, you had been the one to fall hard and the one to put the most effort. 
After your third relationship, you said you’d take a break but the universe works in mysterious ways. Six months after your last relationship you went out to eat with an old friend. 
Only for the bus boy at the establishment to quite literally crash into you spilling soda and old pasta on you. That was when you met Adrian.
After that awkward encounter, you ran into him once more at a gas station. Adrian was different to say the least, but you could tell he really truly did try to be nice to everyone. 
You exchanged numbers then and it grew from there. You fell once again, but this time you fell harder than you’ve ever fallen before. You didn’t know love can feel like this. 
You thought you loved your first boyfriend. You were wrong. The feelings you had for Adrian were the strongest you’d ever felt for anyone. That includes your family. 
He was sweet and so soft. Adrian was the first boyfriend you had to actually show that he cared.
You gave Adrian your everything. You didn’t know if he felt the same, but you didn’t think you’d ever love anything or anyone like how you loved Adrian Chase.
What you didn’t know is that Adrian felt the exact same way. Adrian fell so hard for you.
He didn’t know that love like this existed at all. He loved you so much sometimes it hurt him.
Girls didn’t want to date him. 
Girls didn’t want him near them, but you did. You wanted all of him. His weird quirks and habits. Adrian fell so hard for you. What you also didn’t know is that Adrian fell first. 
Adrian fell for you after your first night spent together. It was your fourth date.
You had asked him if you could go over. You guys spent the night doing..well fun things.
The next morning, when Adrian awoke without you next to him. He sighed sadly.
Another person who was probably disappointed in him. Chris was right he probably wasn’t good enough for a girl to genuinely like him...
But then he smelled bacon?
Adrian grabbed a pocket knife heading to the kitchen looking in shock as you hummed whisking a bowl.
His heart began to race as you stood there in nothing but your shirt and his boxers. You smiled widely seeing him.
“Oh good morning! I would’ve woken you up, but you looked so peaceful and I wanted to surprise you after yesterday because man did you really treat me yesterday..” You grew a bit flustered at the memories.
“Do you like pancakes Adrian?” 
He stood there stunned just staring at you for a moment before striding across the room to hug you tightly.
“Yeah I like pancakes...” 
You smiled returning the hug a bit difficult with the bowl in your hand, but you still returned it. 
“You look so fucking pretty right now dude.” 
You blushed a bit smiling. “Thanks Adrian..now let me go please I gotta make the pancakes so the bacon doesn’t get cold.” 
“I don’t care about the bacon getting cold we can always reheat it..”
Adrian wanted right there and then to tell you how much he loved you, but he held back. It was your fourth date after all. Even he knew it was too soon. 
That led to now. One year had passed since you both got together. You had found out about Adrian being Vigilante after six months together. 
He thought you would leave, but you surprised him by saying I love you. That was your first time saying I love you. 
Adrian didn’t let you go at all that night. 
You moved in with him after an official year together. “You sure you wanna live here?” You nodded reassuring him once more.
“Dude we’ve gone over this. Your place is way more homey than my one bedroom apartment.” You kissed his cheek carrying a box.
Adrian took the box from you with a grin. “As long as you want this...”
“I do..do you?” Adrian nodded eagerly. 
“I do. I’ve haven’t wanted anything more than this.” You smiled grabbing another box.
“Then let’s go roomie.” 
Adrian had been ecstatic when you said yes after he first initially asked. It was a week ago, you both had just gotten done having fun once again. 
As you laid cuddled up to him, he couldn’t stop staring at you and it occurred to him he wanted this every day. 
‘Move in with me.’
He thought you’d say no from how surprised you looked when he asked. You smiled though and said yes before jumping on him laughing.
Adrian didn’t regret asking you for one second. He was happy so long as you were and lucky for him he was what made you happy. 
The first week together had felt like a small dream to you. Every morning waking up next to him became your new favorite thing in the whole world. 
Peace doesn’t last forever though.
It started when Peacemaker had been released from prison. Adrian told you how excited he was now that his best friend was out of prison.
You knew the stories and genuinely believed Peacemaker had to be some kind of good person. Adrian talked about him as if he was.
You trusted Adrian.
“Y/N I want you to meet Peacemaker!” You looked up from the stove in surprise hearing him.
“Wow you must be excited I didn’t even get a hi..” Adrian walked to you hugging you from behind. 
“Okay hi now will you meet my bestie?!” He excitedly brought it up. He wanted nothing more than for his two favorite people to get along. 
You hummed in thought. “Okay. I’ll meet him. He sounds like a cool guy from how you describe him.” Adrian cheered at your answer.
“Fuck yeah!” He pulled you away from the stove kissing you deeply. You reciprocated almost immediately before pulling away. 
“Okay we’ll go out tomorrow yeah? Let me finish cooking now yeah?” Adrian shook his head. 
“Nope let me help!” You sighed with a small smile letting him help you finish dinner.
The next day, you couldn’t help but be nervous to meet the person Adrian has deemed as his best friend.
What if he didn’t like you? Would Adrian not like you anymore? No...he wouldn’t..
You were slightly scared. 
As you walked into the bar holding Adrian’s hand you couldn’t help but smile seeing Adrian grow excited. He pulled you along waving at Peacemaker.
“Dude!” 
“Oh hey Adrian!” He whistled seeing you, “Hello..who are you? I’m Christopher Smith. You could call me Chris.” He smirked a bit as Adrian sat you both down across from him.
You smiled at him raising your hand, “Hi my name is Y/N. I’m Adrian’s girlfriend-”
“Thimble’s girlfriend? I highly doubt that.” Adrian laughed at his small joke, but you noticed the small frown he wanted to make.
“Thimble?” You asked a bit confused.
“Yeah you know,” Chris made a small gesture with his fingers, 
“I didn’t hit puberty till I was in my twenties.” Adrian smiled at you.
“Oh..well that’s not very nice.” You frowned a bit. Adrian waved it off. 
“It’s fine he usually makes fun of people like this!” Adrian reassured you patting your leg. 
You nodded still feeling a bit uneasy. As the night went on you realized you had every right to feel uneasy. 
Christopher Smith was an asshole.
“Yeah we had some good times together huh Adrian?” Adrian nodded agreeing with Chris. 
“We really did! It was so awesome back then Y/N!” 
Back then was it not awesome now?..
Chris went into detail about some of the old stuff they use to do. Although most of it was about him. He waved Adrian off completely.
“There were also the threesomes.” 
“Oh yeah I forgot about those.” Adrian shrugged as Chris laughed. 
“That’s surprising considering some of the girls were..woo! I mean your girlfriend is pretty hot too.” Chris winked at you.
You grew uncomfortable hearing his words. 
“Threesomes?...I didn’t know about those..” Chris made a small surprised look. 
“Really I thought Adrian would’ve talked about it.” Adrian shrugged. 
“I mean it’s not like I have to tell her all the stories of the past.” You grit your teeth at his words. You told him everything about you. 
It was fine he had secrets, but you would’ve like to have known he had sex with multiple women with his best friend. Is this what he meant when he said it use to be awesome back then? 
Did he want to go back to that?
Adrian usually wouldn’t shrug off your feelings like this as well. Why was he acting so different? This wasn’t your sweet boyfriend who cared. This was a completely different person.
You didn’t like that.
“So Y/N what do you do?” You smiled a bit not wanting to ruin the night.
“Oh well I own a small flower shop-”
“Flowers?”
You nodded, “Yeah flowers. I like plants.” 
“That’s kinda boring.” Chris took a sip of his beer staring at you as if you were the weird one.
“How is that boring? I’m doing something I enjoy and Adrian likes my plants and flowers..”
“Well does he? Last I check he used to complain about them.” You glanced at Adrian seeing him keep a neutral face.
“Well he assured me he likes them...He gets excited when I tell him about the new shipments!” 
Chris laughed, “Really dude you like flowers now?” Adrian nodded. 
“Yeah they’re really pretty dude! Y/N grows the best flowers!” You smiled hearing him. This was your boyfriend.
“Although she does talk about them a lot and I mean a lot sometimes I feel like it’s all she talks about.” Adrian laughed a bit with Chris as you sat there feeling embarrassed. You wanted to go home.
“Um..I’m not feeling so well..” Adrian looked at you worriedly. 
“Oh crap you okay?” You nodded a bit. 
“Yeah I think I just need some rest. I’ma head on home early. I’ll see you then okay?” Adrian shook his head standing up. 
“No come on I’ll take you home-”
“No Adrian. Stay with your friend. Have fun.” You kissed his cheek walking out a bit hurriedly. 
Adrian sat down confused. You looked upset. No he knew you were upset.”I think I’ma head on home dude. I wanna make sure she’s okay.”
“You sure dude? She did say she was fine.”
“Yeah I wanna see with my own eyes.” Chris nodded. 
“Alright dude if you wanna hang out soon call I guess.” Adrian nodded. “I will.” 
He got home confused to see you sitting in bed reading a book with a cup of tea next to you. “Y/N?” 
You jumped hearing him, “Oh hey..I thought you were staying out?” 
Adrian made a small noise, “Psh. How could I relax and have fun knowing you weren’t feeling good?” You smiled a small bit hearing his words.
“Thanks hun..I’m feeling better now so if you wanna go out again you can?” Adrian shook his head moving to sit at the end of the bed.
“Why were you upset?” You looked at him a bit in shock. 
“I wasn’t upset-”
“Y/N I can tell when you’re upset. You may not think I can, but I can.” You stood quiet for a small moment at his words.
“Do you miss the way things use to be with Chris?” 
“What?”
“Like before you got with me. It seems like you did.” Adrian shook his head. 
“I don’t. I miss my friend and sure some of things we used to do, but I’m happy with you,” 
“Are you? I don’t bore you or anything-”
“No you don’t. Why are you bringing this up?” You sighed. 
“You act different around Chris.” 
“What? No I don’t-”
“You do Adrian. You may not think you do, but you do. You shrugged me off by not telling me about the past threesomes with Chris.”
“I didn’t think they were important-”
“They’re not, but still something I would’ve like to have known about. You embarrassed me too..I don’t mean to talk about my flower shop so much..If it really bothered you I wish you would’ve said something instead of laughing about it with Chris.”
Adrian shook his head, “Okay hold on. Hold on. I did not embarrass you if anything you kinda embarrassed yourself-”
“Excuse me?”
“Let me finish. You seemed disinterested in everything Peacemaker said-”
“Most of it was making fun of you! Are you seriously angry at me for not liking that he made fun of you?” You grew a bit angry sitting more up in bed.
“I didn’t say that and I’m not mad! You’re the one who’s mad right now!”
“Because you’re implying that I embarrassed myself by not wanting to listen to a dick make fun of my incredible boyfriend!”
Adrian laughed standing up. “This is getting out of hand.” 
“Yeah it is, You made fun of me with your friend about something I’m passionate about and the second I bring it up you say I embarrassed myself.”
“Y/N it’s Peacemaker! He has a pet Eagle! He doesn’t wanna hear about flowers!” You stood up following Adrian out. 
“You did when we met! I thought you liked my flowers!” 
“I do! I just think you shouldn’t have brought them up to Peacemaker!” You clenched your fist hurt by him.
“He asked about them!” 
“Well they were boring to him.” 
“I don’t care about them being boring to him! I don’t want them to be boring to you!! That’s what I’m trying to get at! I don’t wanna be boring to you! You made fun of me tonight! You shrugged me off as if I was a nuisance and now you say I was the embarrassment of tonight!” 
“Because you were! I just wanted a good night out with my friend and you Y/N, but now I realize that was a bad idea on my part! Since you’re being suddenly really fucking sensitive! Fuck maybe the old days were fucking better.” 
You froze hurt by his his words. Biting your lip to stop crying. Adrian looked down realizing what he said. “Y/N-” 
“Don’t. Okay..just don’t.. Go out with your friend. Sorry I brought it up.” You mumbled out walking back to your room. Adrian sighed hearing the door close.
He grabbed his jacket taking off to calm down. He’d apologize in the morning.
You sniffled a bit in bed flinching hearing the front door slam. Was Adrian going to end up like every other relationship in your life? Was he going to leave?
He was the best thing you’d ever had..You didn’t wanna lose him, but if he thinks you’re boring and embarrassing then him leaving was probably for the best. 
You’d never would’ve made him feel the way he just made you feel. You knew he knows the feeling too. His parents and brother used to treat him this way...
Adrian drove to Chris’s walking in deciding to drink the night away, but as he sat on the couch drinking he couldn’t help but to replay the fight in his mind.
What if you left him after this? He fucked up he knows he did.
“Come on man you’re being a buzz kill. What’s on your mind?”
Adrian sighed hearing Chris, “I got into a fight with Y/N.” Chris looked at him in surprise.
“What? You guys are like disgustingly in love what do you have to fight about?”
“You really think so?” Chris nodded. 
“Yeah dude it’s so obvious. Now what happened?” Adrian replayed the fight to Chris surprised when Chris smacked him upside the head.
“You were being a dick.” 
“I know! I know I was! Ow..”
“You deserve way more than that. Dude I know I’m an asshole she had every right to be angry and she was right you did laugh at her with me! Fuck now I’m realizing how much of a dick I was.”
Adrian sighed taking another drink from his bottle. “I’ll go home in the morning. I think she wants some space.” 
Only that didn’t happen. Adrian was angry and upset with himself so he drank and drank.
You received a call from him at around three a.m. 
“Adrian?..is everything okay?” 
“Y/N!!” He was drunk. “I miss you so fucking much!..” 
You sighed hearing him, “Do you want me to come get you?” 
“No no! I honestly don’t know why I called..I know you’re probably mad at me..I’m mad at me..” He sighed. 
“I just wanted to hear your voice to know you were okay..I got really sad at the thought of you crying in bed without me there. I didn’t mean what I said...” You smiled a bit hearing his voice crack.
“I was such an asshole.” He hiccuped a bit. “Do us both a favor don’t forgive me so suddenly.” 
You laughed a bit, “Where are you?” 
“Why?” He asked confused.
“I’m gonna go get you. We can talk in the morning..” Adrian sniffled a bit. 
“I’m at Peacemakers pick me up tomorrow morning hun! I don’t want you driving so late for an idiot like me!” 
“Are you sure?” 
“Yeah please..please..don’t drive so late...” He wiped his face.
“Okay...I’ll go get you tomorrow okay hun?” 
“Okay...I’ma try to get some sleep..I can’t sleep without you..” You wiped away a stray tear. 
“Get some rest I promise I’ll be there tomorrow morning.” 
You awoke with a small heavy heart. You still needed to talk to Adrian about what was said. He said he didn’t mean it, but you needed to hear it in person.
Part of you dreaded seeing him, you wanted to forgive him but he really hurt your feelings. Adrian had sent you Peacemakers address yesterday for you to find him.
Once arriving, you knocked on the door waiting for Chris or Adrian to open up. Neither did. “Adrian?” You called out knocking again. You sighed tapping your foot.
The door opened. It was a girl wearing your boyfriends sweater. “Is this Christopher Smith’s place?...” You trailed off not able to tear your eyes away from Adrian’s sweater on her. 
You walked in seeing Chris asleep in bed along with Adrian on the other side...
Was the phone call a mistake? Did he not mean what he said? He really did want the past back with his friend.
Your entire body felt like it was breaking. Your chest tightened up as you tried to bite back your sobs. Grabbing a glass from Chris’s cabinet, the girl looked in confusion seeing you fill it up before throwing it in Adrian’s face.
He yelped out a bit opening his eyes to see you. “Y/N?” Adrian tilted his head in confusion.
“How the fuck could you?!” He looked behind you to see the girl wearing his sweater. 
“Shit wait! I know what it looks like-” 
“Oh I know what it is! You’re a piece of shit Adrian Chase!” You sobbed a bit storming off. 
“Don’t worry my stuff will be out of your place by tonight.” 
Adrian shot out of the bed chasing after you. “Y/N! Y/N please wait!” 
You scoffed ignoring him, “Y/N I’m sorry! But it really isn’t what you think!!” He reached out grabbing your arm to stop you from leaving.
“Don’t fucking touch me!” You pushed him away, 
“Don’t touch me. You don’t get to fucking touch me. You..Fuck Adrian...Fuck! You mean the fucking world to me! Do you not get that?! Was I not good enough for you!? Why?! I can’t..” You panted a bit shaking.
Adrian shook his head, “You are good enough! Y/N you’re everything I could ever want! I promise!” 
“No I’m not! Obviously I wasn’t! Adrian..I fucking love you!! I really really do! You..I thought you wouldn’t hurt me! You promised to never hurt me like I’ve been hurt before! You promised...” 
Adrian’s heart broke hearing your sobs. You weakly tried pushing him away as he pulled you to him. It hurt him. 
“I’m not..That wasn’t what I wanted! It’s not what you think please let me explain..” His voice cracked as he pleaded with you.
Adrian knew that this did not look good. None of it did. He doesn’t blame you for thinking the way you did.
“Please..Y/N please..I promise you it’s not what it fucking looks like! I swear to you on everything! I drank a lot last night! I did, but I would never fucking hurt you this way! I would never!” 
You laughed a bit, “I embarrassed myself last night remember and I talk too much about my shop-”
“No you did not! I was an asshole for saying that! I am a complete idiot! I love hearing you talk about your shop. You smile so widely when you talk about it! I love to see that smile.”
“You said the old days without me were better-”
“They’re not! Y/N I was so fucking lonely back then! I didn’t feel much of anything back then! The only real thrill I got was when I was Vigilante! You made me feel things I didn’t know I could...Fuck the old days. I want my days with you..” 
You cried a bit in his chest as he rubbed your back. 
“I shouldn’t have left. I should’ve just marched back in and apologized right there and then. I am so fucking sorry..I’m sorry...None of what you saw right now is what it looks like. Chris had sex with her..I did not. I fell asleep.”
“Why were you in bed with them! Why is she wearing your fucking sweater!?” 
“Chris gave her my sweater when she got cold. He told me about it after they finished! She didn’t sleep in the same bed as me and him. She slept on the couch! I slept in the bed with Chris cause I was too drunk to walk and he wanted to make sure I didn’t choke in my sleep. I swear to you..that is what happened..”
You shook a bit as Adrian gripped you tightly. “Excuse me...” You peaked your head up seeing the girl now wearing Chris’s shirt. 
“I’m so sorry I caused confusion...He told me he had a girlfriend. Everything he’s saying is true..I was given his sweater cause I got cold..I promise nothing happened between me and him..Only me and the other guy..” 
You nodded taking Adrian’s sweater from her. “Thank you..” You mumbled out as she awkwardly nodded.
Adrian waited for a response from you as you fiddled with his sweater. Chris walked out heading to you both.
“Dude Y/N! Gina just told me what happened! Nothing happened no threesomes took place! I promise! I just made him sleep in my bed to make sure the idiot didn’t choke on his vomit! No threesomes happened! Adrian like is totally obsessed with you-” 
“I know the girl explained everything already.” 
“Oh...” You snorted a bit as he adjusted himself. 
“Sorry for the scene I caused-” 
“Don’t apologize! I was being a dick last night and you had every right to think what you thought! Adrian told me what happened. You didn’t deserve me laughing at you. I promise you again though. No threesomes happened last night, but if you ever wanted one I wouldn’t be opposed-”
“Dude!” Adrian yelled at him angrily. 
“Back off! I don’t share her!” 
You laughed a bit as they argued back and forth. 
“I’m just saying wouldn’t you want someone you know touching your girlfriend-”
“No I don’t want anyone touching her but me!”
You grabbed Adrian’s hand shutting them both up. Chris cleared his throat, ‘Well I guess I’ll be going inside now. Reach out when you wanna hang again dude. Y/N good to see you. Sorry again.” 
Chris left as Adrian took his sweater from you to put around your shoulders. “It’s cold..” He murmured kissing your forehead.
You nodded letting him walk you to the car. It was a quiet drive back. Once at home, Adrian showered as you threw his sweater in the hamper. 
“Please say something.” Adrian sat next to you after he got changed. You shrugged. 
“I don’t know what to say..I’m a bit embarrassed..”
“No don’t be. You had every right to think the way you did Y/N. I’m surprised you’re still here to be honest..”
“Do you not want me to be-”
“Yes I want you here! I don’t want you anywhere else but here! Please don’t go..”
You nodded moving into Adrian’s arms. “Hold me?” He nodded quickly. 
“I want nothing more than to hold you..I’m so so sorry Y/N..I’m so sorry..” Adrian kissed you wanting you to know how he felt. 
“I’m sorry too Adrian..” He shook his head. 
“No you don’t apologize. I crossed the line last night with what I said. I love you..I love you so fucking much..I realized I did the morning after we had sex for the first time..I thought you left, but you didn’t. Instead you made pancakes..”
“I thought it’d be nice to make you pancakes..” You smiled at the realization Adrian fell first.
“It was..It was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for me. I’m sorry..” 
You smiled kissing him. “It’s okay..I missed you so much last night..I really did Adrian. I shouldn’t have let you leave..I had trouble sleeping.” 
He grinned hearing you, “I had to get stupid drunk to fall asleep. I’m used to you here with me..I’m sorry again-” 
“Shut up.” You pulled him into a deep kiss running your hands through his hair. Adrian took a deep breath kissing you back roughly. He groaned as you tugged his hair. 
You smiled as he began kissing your neck. “Fuck..so pretty..” Adrian whispered in your ear kissing your jaw nibbling it softly.
You gasped a bit as he moved his hands up the back of your shirt fiddling with your bra strap. “Can I?”
You grinned. He always asked you first. Even if you’d made it clear you wanted it, he still always asked. 
“Yeah Adrian you can..”
“Fucking hot.” He moved you under him kissing you. You couldn’t keep the smile off your place. 
“So fucking beautiful..How could you ever think I’d want anyone but you?..” He grunted as you pulled him off your neck.
“I love you Adrian..please don’t leave me..”
“I could never leave you..I should be asking you not to leave me with the shit I just had you put up with..Fuck I love you Y/N..”
You pulled him down kissing him once more. “Keep kissing me idiot.” 
“Careful I won’t let you leave the bed if you say it like that.”
“Maybe I want that.”
Adrian smiled kissing your forehead, “Then it’s settled you’re not leaving this bed until I say you can or unless you have to pee. I don’t wanna be weird and dictate your bladder. It is your bladder. You know when nature calls-”
“You’re ruining the mood.”
“Oh..” He sheepishly smiled kissing you again. “Please forget what I said.” 
You laughed as he began to lift your shirt off.
“No promises..”
363 notes · View notes
the7thcrow · 2 years
Text
ideal woman | k.ys
pairing: yeosang x (fem) reader.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
………
wc: 10.5k
genre: romance. suggestive. angst. a tad bit of fluff if you squint. gang au. basically a romp between inherent enemies.
summary: at the only bar in town where the lines drawn between different gangs becomes blurry, you spot your intellectual rival involved in one of the biggest underground organizations the city has to offer. responsible for the recent heist on your warehouse, as well as the death of multiple of your gang’s own members, he’s understandably considered someone that you should not be talking to. you buy him a drink.
warnings: non-graphic talk of violence and death, mention of drugs, alcohol, smoking cigars, suggestive content.
a/n: look who’s finally gotten around to starting these (go me). requested by @joontied for my 1 year anniversary event. inspired by the song ideal woman by celeste.
UPDATE: currently dealing with formatting issues because tumblr sucks. if you have repeating paragraphs, feel free to read here on ao3 instead. thanks so much.
...
...
...
Duke’s is muddy territory.
A term for where the line’s between different gang’s and operation’s blur, the dingy old bar is a neutral breeding ground of sorts, a place where enemy’s under any other circumstances can drink alone together. That is to say at their own seat at the bar with their own drink and company, but at the same time, two feet away sits another member doing the exact same thing. Sharing a moment together in loneliness, but then again, it’s ultimately better than drinking alone.
Yet, for the amount of steady business the bar always seems to receive, Duke’s remains a bit of a dump. The lamp-post outside having been burnt out for months, which may now be years under consideration, the owner - Duke - put’s little care in keeping the establishment together. Prone to bar-fights due to the nature of the facility, as tension is ultimately unavoidable in some circumstances when a member of one gang as had a few too many drinks, and it’s the man who shot his buddy last night sitting just a few tables away, the furniture remains constantly scratched and worn from being flipped over. Glass typically coats the streets outside as nobody cares to sweep it up, and plenty of lamps hanging down from the ceiling have been cracked and shattered, and will most likely never be replaced until the bar is one day shrouded in complete darkness.
To be frank, it’s a shithole. But that’s exactly what you like about it.
Nursing a gin and tonic at the front end of the bar, you do your best to ignore the constant buzzing in your pocket, as your phone begs for attention. You don’t have to check who it is, Hongjoong is always like this in the days leading up to and of a big operation. Always asking whether that particular part of his plan is fool-proof, or whether this piece of the puzzle needs some work. It’s all underground politics, manipulation, and holding your hand close to your chest. All things that although he won’t admit it aloud, he knows you’re far better at than him.
And while you should be flattered to know that the leader of KQ values your intelligence, it would be nice for him to not endlessly bother you on what was supposed to be your night off.
Digging into your purse, you pull out your phone, screen already set alight from his latest message.
Without bothering to read it, you turn your phone on silent and stuff it back into your bag. If he doesn’t understand where to draw the line, then you’ll just have to do it for him. You don’t need his constant supervision.
Forgoing your straw, you bring the rim of the glass up to your lips, tipping your head back as you let the rest of the liquid pour down your throat. A pleasant sort of burn, one you’ve grown to appreciate after years of drinks at this very bar-stool, you flash Duke a smile and a small wave.
As the burly man - with a bushy red beard and healthy beer-gut beneath his dirtied apron - makes his way over to you, your attention is quickly pulled away as you catch sight of a man over his shoulder.
Blonde hair that hangs long in the back - although parted neatly in the front in order to frame his face - he sits with his chin cupped in his palm. Clearly lost in thought, his gaze is trained mindlessly on the display of spirits behind the bar. Sporting a white button up that is slightly too large, draping over his figure and allowing his collarbone to peek through, he almost shines like a beacon of light amidst the dreariness of the facility.
Kang Yeosang. You recognize him.
A sort of mirrored image of your own role in KQ, Yeosang is the leader of SMY’s right hand man. The intelligence behind the operation, the brains behind the brawn. He was the mind responsible for SMY's surprise heist on one of your own warehouses a few weeks ago, that left you down a dozen men, as well as the pots in your meth lab empty.
He’s dangerous. Not your typical sort, no immediate danger in sight as the two of you sit merely ten feet apart. You aren’t sure of his skill with weaponry, but you’re fairly certain the most he has on him is a knife, and is likely not an expert in using it.
When Duke takes your drink order, you ask him for another gin and tonic, as well as a glass of whatever Yeosang is currently sipping to send his way.
Duke raises a brow, the request certainly out of the ordinary in a room full of inherent enemies, but he fetches a glass nonetheless. After completing your gin and tonic, he pours an accompanying glass of whisky out in front of you - Glen Mckenna, as you can now recognize it to be - before taking it in hand as he makes his way over to Yeosang.
Setting it down in front of him, the blonde blinks out of his daze before his gaze falls down to the drink before him. Eyes fluttering upward, he casts Duke a confused - as well as slightly suspicious - glance.
Duke simply shrugs, pointing over his shoulder over to where you are sitting. Following his finger, Yeosang's eyes slowly drift over to meet yours. At first his expression is blank, but after a moment his eyes widen with a sense of familiarity. Lips parted in a small “o” shape, he seems unsure of what to make of it.
You simply smile, lifting your glass up and tilting the rim towards him in a sort of long distance “cheers”, before taking a sip yourself.
He pauses for a moment, before a small smile begins to creep onto his lips. Whether a manifestation of surprise, or simply genuine gratitude for the drink, you aren’t sure. Either way, he takes a sip of his whisky, eyes not leaving yours as he does so.
A moment passes by where neither of the two of you move, and it serves as a sort of cross-roads for the evening ahead of you. On the one hand, you could retract your gaze right now, leave the drink as simply a nice gesture and nothing more. Nurse your gin and tonic for a few more minutes, then grab your bag and leave the bar. Head home to your apartment on the other end of town before sifting through and responding to Hongjoong’s texts for the next couple hours until sleep inevitably takes you.
Or, on the other hand, you could push a little further. Smile back at him, maybe let him return the favour. Chat. Whatever normal people do on a night out in town.
You slip out of your chair and onto your feet.
Drink in hand, you walk over to meet him at his spot at the other end of the bar. Another look of surprise flashing over his features, you note how he slips his own phone off the counter and into his pocket. Out of sight.
“Hello,” you say, a simple enough opening as you slide into the chair beside him.
He raises an eyebrow, corner of his lip drawn up into a smirk. “Well, isn’t this a surprise.”
It’s not in reference to you being at Duke’s. After all, this is not the first time the two of you have seen each other here, on multiple occasions having granted eachother a small nod in greeting. Or well, perhaps greeting is a bit of a strong term, recognition more accurate. A nod that says: I know you and you know me. I know just what terrible things you’re capable of, and I have accomplished just the same.
And yet, here we both are. Drinking alone to forget another day.
Safe to say, the two of you don’t really chat beyond meetings between the higher-ups. You know his voice, you know he’s witty and a little risky with his level of sarcasm at times, but you don’t really know him.
And maybe you’re curious what lies beneath those layers.
“Long day?” You ask, taking the lime from the corner of your glass and squeezing it into your drink.
Yeosang chuckles. “Aren’t they all long days?”
“I don’t know,” you reply, a smile creeping itself along your own lips. When you speak, it’s after another sip. “I would expect it to be a real celebration for you over there, what with your recent success and all.”
At the reference to the ambush he’d orchestrated on your warehouse, Yeosang freezes. Hand stilling on his drink, he swallows, eyes quickly shifting from relaxed to poised. Analytical.
You simply chuckle, stirring your straw around in your drink. “Relax,” you say easily, lip curving upwards into a smirk. “I’m not here to jeer you about it.”
He seems to let his guard back down at this, although with a tad bit of hesitancy. His posture softens, but not so much so as to lean back in his chair. Not on guard, but ready to be should the coming minutes permit it. It’s the wise thing to do, and surely how you would be likely to respond as well.
“Hm,” he hums, taking a sip of his own drink, the fingers on his other hand tapping mindlessly against the counter. “Then why are you here?”
You know he doesn’t mean in reference to Duke’s, but you decide to play coy nonetheless. “Can’t a woman simply enjoy a good drink?”
“You know that’s not what I meant,” he replies just as quickly, tilting his head to the side as his eyes flicker up and down, observing you closely. “Why are you talking to me? We both know it’s unprecedented, even around here.”
You tilt your own head to the side, mocking the gesture. “Tired of my own company I suppose.”
Eyes narrowing - although a smile remains on his lips - he doesn’t seem to buy it.
You figure you can grant him some honesty, at least a fraction of it, anyway. “Hongjoong’s getting on my nerves,” you reply with a sigh, flickering your gaze down at the table as to not meet his own. “Guess I want a bit of my own insurgence.”
Yeosang lets out a small laugh at this, merely a light puff of air from his nose. “Well,” he begins, gaze flickering to the side as he chews on the corner of his lip. Perhaps deciding what he dares to say next, if he wants to play into the hand you’ve dealt him.
In the end, it appears that he does.
“Maybe you aren’t the only one in that boat.” He says softly, and you nod, a faint smile on your lips.
“Fine then,” you say, lifting your glass off of the counter and holding out before him. Your eyes meet his own above the rim. “Cheers to a bit of defiance.”
For a second, his gaze flickers from your offered glass, to his own sitting on the countertop. He’s hesitant, at his own crossroads it seems, just as you were earlier. A toast to a night with company that SMY’s leader would never approve of, one that he can either accept or turn away, head back home towards his own gang’s district and comradery.
He lifts up his glass, and the two knock together with a quiet “clink”.
“Cheers,” he replies softly, and you can’t help but smile.
~~~~
Over the last two hours of talking, as well as three drinks that accompanied it, you have learned your fair amount about Kang Yeosang.
Firstly, that he is just as witty as you may have expected, sarcasm a rather active aspect of both his vocabulary and humour. Whether you are discussing your gang or his own, or any of the other smaller crews amidst the city, he always has something clever to say. With a sharp tongue and a tendency to be a tad critical, you find there isn’t a dull moment to be found in conversation.
You suppose this adds to your second point of interest, this being that the man is far more amusing than you’d anticipated. Along with that wit comes a rather dry sense of humour. Not in the sense that he is boring, but rather much of what he says is delivered with such a comedical level of seriousness that you can’t help but laugh along.
But finally, and what intrigues you the most about the man in question, is that he seems to hate SMY. Perhaps not near as much as your gang does, but enough to discuss his distaste openly, with a member of what is supposed to be his enemy number one, at that.
Interesting.
“What would you do?” He asks, the two of you having forgone all formalities. His cheek rests in his palm, his other brought up to sit on the table, fingers tapping against the cool metal. You’d originally pegged it to be a nervous tick, but perhaps it is simply a habit.
“What would I do if…?” You ask, tone slightly teasing as you are unsure of what he’s getting at.
“If it weren’t for all of this,” he says, lifting his hand from the counter to motion around him. “If it weren’t for Duke’s, for SMY and KQ, what would you do?”
You don’t even consider the question before answering. “I don’t see much of a point in imagining that. There is no life without them, we’re too wrapped up.”
Yeosang sighs, narrowing his eyes. “Come on,” he says gently, the corner of his lips tilting up into a soft smile. “There must be something.”
He leans in a little closer, and for the first time you feel nervous. Not from the close proximity, but from the question itself.
What would you do if it weren’t for all this?
A simple question, but so much more complicated than he may even realize. It’s a question you’ve never let yourself dwell on, never given much thought other than the late nights spent tossing and turning under your sheets. Where Hongjoong would be off at a late night meeting - or far more likely, with some other girl uptown - unavailable for your occasional inappropriate blur of the lines between colleague and something more… intimate.
Those nights, the one where your studio apartment in KQ’s district feels a bit more like a prison cell than a home, those are the one’s that question enters your mind.
Where would you be, if not here? Who would you be upset over, if not him? What would you do with your life, if not this?
You’ve never come up with an answer, always veering your brain in a different direction when your conscience comes too close. But as the blonde watches you intently, awaiting your answer, you feel the strange urge to muster one.
And yet, you can’t. Not just yet, anyway. The vulnerability of it all is too much for you to offer up first. Better to make it like a business transaction, something you’re more familiar with. I will only offer something to you if you grant it to me prior.
“What would you do?” You ask him, voice barely above a whisper. You almost expect him to deflect the question, to say that he asked you first, and thus should receive an answer before he gives his own..
Instead, he sighs. Eyes drifting upwards, and focusing on the dim hanging lantern above you, he seems to consider it for a moment. “I would go to the mountains,” he says finally, and you can’t help the surprised laugh you let out.
“The mountains?” You ask, and his gaze falls back down to yours, eyes wide with surprise at your laughter.
“Yes?” He says, and when you continue to laugh he smiles, tone a tad affronted. “Why is that so funny?”
“I’m sorry,” you say genuinely, feeling a little bad due to the affronted look on his face. Motioning outwards with your hand, you gesture up and down, in reference to his head to toe appearance. His designer loafers, pristine white button up. Custom-tailor fitted pants and bleached blonde hair that you're certain he gets done at least every few weeks to remain so  flawless. “I just never would have guessed.”
He sighs at this, rolling his eyes, albeit playfully. The smile remains on his lips as he speaks, but you can’t help but notice his drop in tone, words holding a tad more somber of an edge than previously.
“I know it’s a bit strange,” he says, voice lowered as he leans in a little closer. Maybe he just doesn’t want anyone else to hear, but the proximity undeniably makes the moment feel more intimate. “But I just think it’s the exact opposite of this city.”
“Is that what you would want?” You ask, curious. “The exact opposite?”
Yeosang pauses a moment before answering. “I would want somewhere quiet. With no violence or underground politics. Where I can walk wherever I want at night without the risk of getting mugged or kidnapped for ransome or murdered. Where I could have someone over to my place without it being seen as taboo, but also secluded enough to not have everyone involved in my business.”
“And the air doesn’t smell like shit,” you add, and he chuckles.
“That too,” he says. As the laughter between the two of you dies out, he speaks again. “So yeah, the exact opposite.”
“Still, I think you could find somewhere better than the mountains,” you add, doing your best to keep the lightness to the conversation alive, not wanting to know where it might go if you let the heaviness dwell too long.
“Oh, really?” He laughs, taking the bait with ease. Perhaps heaviness isn’t something he desires either. “And where would you go?”
You know it’s another attempt at breaking down the wall you’ve put up, another shot at hearing your answer.
However, he gave his own, and perhaps you owe him that much.
“A beach,” you say softly, and the answer comes as a surprise even to yourself. You’ve never dreamed of a beach, even within the brief fantasies you’ve never permitted yourself to have. But as you say the words, they feel right.
“A beach?” He says, eyebrows raising his surprise, as well as delight. “Why?”
“I don’t know,” you rush out quickly, feeling flustered all of a sudden, embarrassed. “Sand, warm weather, ocean breeze. It might be nice.”
You feel stupid for admitting it, telling this man who’s practically a stranger - or better, an enemy - an unspoken weakness. After all, it’s a vulnerable piece of information that a higher up within one of the major gang’s within the city dreams of being someplace else.
But Yeosang doesn’t seem to treat it as such. Instead, he smiles.
“It does sound nice,” he offers gently, and his hand falls onto yours on the table. Maybe it’s the alcohol buzzing around your system, but the action sends an unexpected jolt through you, a rush of warmth to your cheeks. He laughs quietly. “Better than the mountains, anyway.”
You chuckle, agreeing with the sentiment, although you can’t help the strange feeling that passes through you, almost like a tingle beneath your skin. An itch of sorts, one that tells you that this is wrong. You shouldn’t be discussing these sorts of things with him, it’s too dangerous. Not only that, but too vulnerable.
You should change the subject.
Fortunately, this comes almost naturally, as a loud clunking noise echoes from the other side of the bar. Craning your neck around, you watch as a burly man - one from a lesser gang you assume, based on how you don’t recognize him in the slightest - stands up from his chair. A puddle of beer coats the table in front of him, dripping down the rim of his glass, and you assume the noise had been him smashing it down on the table top.
While you don’t know why he’s angry, you can at least tell who his outburst is being directed at. A short stout man, with ginger hair and a scar that runs along his eyes sits in the chair before him. If he feels any sense of fear or intimidation he doesn’t show it, leaning back into his chair with his arms crossed and a bored expression across his face.
The lackadaisical attitude only seems to agitate the burly man further, and as he begins to shout something about a bet and how the man owes him his due, you know that Dukes’ weekly brawl is most likely about to commence.
Yeosang appears to recognize this as well, as he rolls his eyes. Letting out a deep sigh, his hand finally drifts away from your own, and the absence of it feels cool over your knuckles.
He most likely thinks that the night is over, neither of you are the type to participate in needless and mindless violence, at least not on the brawn side of things.
Besides, beyond Duke’s there’s really nowhere for the two of you to go. At least nowhere safe, where the ground remains neutral. For the night to go any further, one of you would have to take a rather significant risk, walking onto enemy turf with no defence nor back-up waiting for you.
Which is perhaps why Yeosang is so surprised by what you say next.
“So,” you start, eyes wandering from the escalating situation, over to meet his own. Your hand drifts to rest on top of his knuckles, mirroring his own boldness earlier. A small grin laces your lips as you manage to catch how his eyes widen slightly with surprise, although he does well to hide it.
“Your place?” You ask, and this time he doesn’t do well to hide it at all.
Mouth parting open slightly, his gaze darts from your face to the door, eyebrows furrowing. “Are you…okay with that?” He settles on finally, tone laced with genuine concern. By the sounds of it, it’s a risk he wouldn’t take himself if the offer had been reversed.
But you’ve always been a little more daring in your plans. Willing to play a tad more dirty, with a level of risk that some would cower at.
Now is no different.
“Of course,” you reply with a level of nonchalance, slipping off your chair and pulling your purse back up and over your shoulder. Heels clicking beneath you as you make a few steps towards the door, you glance over your shoulder to find he’s already watching you intently.
You nod towards the jacket covering the back of his chair. “Grab your coat,” you say. With a grin, he follows.
~~~~
The walk to Yeosang’s apartment didn’t feel near as dangerous as it may have been in reality. Wearing a simple black mask in order to cover your face and preserve your identity, it almost didn’t feel needed, the two of you only passing by a fellow or two along the way. Making quiet conversation the entire length of the walk, the journey was practically over before you’d even processed that it had started.
Now you are in his apartment. His home.
He lives here, and you aren’t quite sure why, but the thought jares you.
“Feel free to make yourself comfortable” Yeosang says, neatly hanging up his jacket on the coat rack by the door before taking yours in turn.
The first thing you notice about his apartment is that it’s much cleaner than your own. With a minimalistic style, the counters and tables seem almost barren. Everything a classic black and white hugh, it casts a refined atmosphere over the entire apartment, classy. The only real decorations being a few dark paintings that hang on the walls - an abstract sort of style so that you can’t pick out what exactly they are - and an empty vase sitting on the coffee table in his living room.
Feeling a little shy all of a sudden, you take a slow walk around to simply observe. It feels weird to see his place, all of his belongings. Intimate almost, as it’s where he cooks and eats and watches tv, such mundane tasks you rarely imagine a person doing until you get to know them better.
“Can I get you something to drink? Or eat, if you’re hungry?” He asks, moving past you in order to open the fridge.
Taking a seat at his kitchen island, you lay your hands atop the marble counter, not quite sure of what to do with yourself. “A drink will be fine.”
“What would you like?” He asks, closing the refrigerator and moving towards a cupboard, where you assume he keeps his alcohol. “Someone recently gifted me a bottle of bourbon. It’s a bit of a fancy one, if that’s up your alley.”
You wonder if it’s a gift from someone in SMY, perhaps for the success of the heist he planned.
“Bourbon is good with me.”
After pouring two glasses, he slides one across the counter and over to you. Raising it to your lips and taking a sip, he does the same.
It’s so… quiet. The bustle of Duke’s no longer there to provide an ambiance of busy background noise, the entire atmosphere has changed. When you place your glass back down at the counter, it practically rings throughout the entire apartment. Like a drop rippling through still water, it breaks the silence.
You’re far more nervous than you expected yourself to be, and you have yet to decide whether or not that’s a good thing.
“So,” you start after swallowing, taking another moment to glance around. “You live here.”
He chuckles. “I do,” he offers, a small smile painting his lips. When he speaks again, his voice is quiet, and you wonder if he feels the shift in mood as well. “Do you like it?”
“It’s very clean,” you offer, and after realizing that might come off a bit backhanded, you amend: “Classy. Much nicer than my place.”
“I think it’s boring,” he says, walking over from his place across the counter, and sitting at the stool right beside your own. It’s practically the exact same position the two of you had shared at Duke’s, but as he sits down, it feels so utterly different. So much closer, and when his hand falls on top of yours just as it had before, you feel your breath catch in your throat.
He doesn’t seem to notice, but you certainly do. Why are you so nervous? You’ve been at death's door multiple times, had meetings with men who would have you killed in an instant if they had the chance, lied to an entire breakroom of criminals without breaking a sweat.
And yet this - no, he - is the thing that seema to have you losing your cool? Under different circumstances, you’d laugh at the irony.
But for now you just look upwards, gently meeting his dark eyes. “Why not change it then?”
He sighs. “I don’t know,” he starts, but the way his voice trails tells you that he does. “Maybe it’s just that if I really put my heart into the place, it’ll start feeling like a home.”
It’s a strange answer, and the look on your face must make that apparent, as he elaborates.
“If this place starts feeling like a home, I’ll feel even more trapped here than I already do,” he murmurs. His gaze falls, and the mindless tapping of his fingers fills the silence of the apartment, as you struggle to think of what to say in return.
It’s one of the many times tonight that Yeosang has mentioned his discontent. Having stated that you weren’t the only one craving rebellion as well as having it planned where he might be if it weren’t for SMY, it’s interesting. As well as serious.
You also have had your struggles with KQ. With Hongjoong. With this life and routine and the way it all weighs down on your shoulders.
Yet, you have never discussed such things, and you aren’t sure if that’s because you don’t believe them as strongly as Yeosang seems to, or if you are simply too terrified to try. Perhaps a fair mixture of both.
“You’re awfully quiet all of a sudden,” he whispers, breaking you from your thoughts. Running his fingers along your knuckles, they just barely graze your skin. His tone is gentle, but also a tad playful. “Too heavy?”
“No,” you say, extending a hand forward to smooth out the fabric on the shoulder of his button up. You wonder if the light touch affects him the same way it has you. “I’m used to it. But I also wouldn’t mind something a little lighter.”
“Hm,” he hums, the corner of his lip curving upwards. “Have something in mind?”
Gaze drifting across the room, you notice a set of curtains at the end of the living room. Long and draping, as well as covering most of the wall, it’s an odd placement. “Do you have a balcony?”
“I do,” he replies, that little curve to his lips growing far wider. “I also have some Cuban’s, if you’re interested?”
“Speaking my language, I see” you say, leaving your purse on the counter as you make a move to get up. Yeosang follows suit, although instead of following you into the living room, he opens one of the drawers within the kitchen. After sifting through some papers, from beneath them he pulls out a box - more precisely a humidor - setting it down on the counter as he pulls out two cigars.
Pulling back the curtain, followed by the sliding door, the night air feels cool against your skin. The breeze that blows by is especially strong due to your sheer height above the ground, Yeosang’s apartment located near the top floor of one of the tallest sky-scrapers in the city.
Stepping out to place your hands on the metal railing in front of you, you grip it tightly as you lean forward in order to get a better look at the city below. The few people out and about at this hour are like little ants making their way through tunnels rather than street’s, the once towering lamp posts now reduced to mini beads of light, equal distance apart as if strung about on a wire.
You hear the door slide closed behind you, Yeosang following suit by your side. Handing one of the cigars over to you, you slip it between his lips, and he does the service of lighting it.
The smoke is almost dizzying, the pleasant aroma of the Cuban’s hanging potent in the air even with the blowing wind. The rich scent of spices and leather fill your nose, a brilliant concoction of tobacco and plenty else, somehow smelling purely of the earth and the city all at once.
Both of you twisting to face outwards to view the city rather than each other, you blow another puff of smoke into the air before speaking once more. “I’ve never seen the city like this before.”
“Don’t live in the sky?” He asks, and you shake your head, lip curling upwards.
“I don’t, but that’s not what I meant,” you say, gaze fluttering across the quiet streets. The different shops you can just barely make out down below, the other towering apartment buildings with only a few windows still glowing, letting you know you aren’t the only other people with waking lives. “I’ve never been to this side of town. Maybe for a couple meetings, but I’ve never really looked at it, you know?”
Yeosang considers this for a moment. “And how does it compare?”
“It’s…” you start, mulling over the question. In the end, only one answer comes to mind. The truth. “It’s exactly the same.”
He pulls the cigar from his lips before raising an eyebrow, beckoning you to elaborate.
“Same tall skyscrapers with little to differentiate them. Same narrow streets and accompanying lamp posts. Same taxis, same dingy corner stores, same cool wind and foul smell in the air. It’s just all the same,” you say, eyebrows furrowed as you try to wrap your mind around it.
You sigh, and while you know you shouldn’t say the next few words, they tumble from your lips all the same. “Makes you wonder why we all fight so hard for more of it, when it’s all the same shit anyway.”
Yeosang doesn’t say anything to this, but you can hear as his head turns away from the city skyline in order to face you. And yet, you hold yourself back from doing the same, and you aren’t quite sure why. Scared to see his expression, perhaps. What might his eyes say to the briefest vulnerability you’ve granted him? Will they gleam with more than you’re willing to grant?
His free hand drifts to rest on top of yours along the barrier of the balcony, and beckons for you to look at him. With a steadying breath, you do, and he smiles. The look in his eyes is warm - genuine - and you try to match it, although your chest feels tight.
You might be taking this too far, you shouldn’t be talking about this with him. Let him display his own weak discontent, sure, but your own cracks are something you should never let shine through. Not to him, not to Hongjoong, not to any of these men who are far more dangerous than they often appear to be.
Because Yeosang does not appear to be dangerous, especially now, with his expression so soft. Eyes tender and thumb dragging back and forth over your knuckles.
“I think we fight because that’s what we’ve always done,” Yeosang says, tone somber as a quiet sadness creeps its way across his face, settling into a sad sort of smile. “Maybe years ago there was a reason, but now it’s just what we do. Hatred bred and born rather than earned.”
He’s right, and you wonder what Hongjoong might think if you told him that. If you told him your rivalry is pointless, that everything you all do is unjustified. Who cares about power, about warehouses and blood-feuds and meth-labs when it’s a never-ending game? KQ will never win, just as SMY never will. Like a hamster-wheel constantly turning, you chase after a dream that’s impossible to reach. A journey with no end.
It’s a depressing thought, as well as one that surprises you. It’s not the first time such syncism has touched your conscience, but it’s certainly the first time you haven’t brushed it away. Haven’t shoved it down, put a cork in it and bottled it away.
It scares you.
Taking one last drag of your cigar, you let the smoke hang in the back of your throat for a moment, before stubbing it out on the ashtray embedded in the wall next to you.
“Had enough?” Yeosang asks, and you shake your head, blowing out the smoke.
“Not quite,” you reply, trying to bring some lightness back into the conversation, although the weight doesn’t lift completely from your shoulders. “I just can’t finish a full one. I’ll share yours.”
Granting a nod in response, he takes a drag himself before handing it over to you in turn. It’s not as quiet as it was back within his apartment, the background noise of the city far more similar to how it had been in Duke’s. The horns of taxis still blaring even within the quiet of the night, traffic never fully stopping, the city never truly asleep. The wind whistles throughout the tall buildings, and within the distance you can hear laughter of a drunk and wild sort, from a girl you're certain is having more fun than the rest of the town combined.
When was the last time you laughed like that? You aren’t certain you ever have.
Yet, you can’t deny it grants you a bit of comfort. To be accompanied by not only Yeosang, but the city itself. Something unfamiliar, settled by another in which you’re entirely comfortable. A perfect balance.
The smoke in the air is slowly becoming dizzying, the scent incredibly potent, and as he blows out another puff you take in a deep breath. The two of you are close, perhaps even more so now than before as you pass the cigar between you.
“Have you ever thought about this?” He asks suddenly, reaching past you to place the bud of the cigar down on the ashtray.
“Me and you?” You ask, the corner of your lip curved upwards. “No.”
He chuckles at the bluntness of your words, teeth now visible as his grin widens. “Me neither,” he replies, tone drifting towards soft. “Strange, isn’t it?”
“Which part?”
“How neither of us ever even considered it a possibility,” he begins, eyes flickering away from yours and back towards the skyline, almost shy. “We’ve seen each other at meetings countless times, and plotted against one another twice as many.”
He taps his fingers along the railing.
“And yet, now you’re here on my balcony, sharing a drink and a cigar, and it’s like it doesn’t matter. I don’t hate you, not how SMY wants me to. Not the way I pretend to, as if it’s just a part of the job description.”
The statement sends a jolt of surprise that rattles through you, causing you to still.
You don’t hate him, and frankly, you’ve never hated him. But it’s not this fact that surprises you, but rather in trying to recall anyone in SMY that you despise, you seem to draw a blank.
You plot against them not because of passion, but because it’s your role. You hijack their transport routes and send scouts towards their warehouses not because you want nothing more than to see SMY burn, but because it’s just that: your job.
Hongjoong hates SMY. He spends nights laying awake dreaming of his next move. Harbouring resentment over people lost, over past failures and battles. It’s war for him, nestled deep within his soul.
What’s animosity for Hongjoong is mere duty for you, and it’s not until Yeosang points this out that you realize how divisive that is.
What you’re doing right now, a casual drink with a sworn enemy that doesn’t feel like so, Hongjoong could never. Does that make you worse than him? Better? Does it matter at all? Or is it just part of the never-ending cycle, the hamster wheel turning and turning with no end. Wherever your motives fall, you run it all the same, just as you all die equals.
Yeosang doesn’t seem to notice the weight his words have on you. Or if he does, he refrains from acknowledging it. Instead he continues to move his thumb back and forth, palm of his hand moving upwards to more fully rest atop your own.
“But I’ve enjoyed our little insurgence,” he says, giving your hand a soft squeeze. “Haven’t you?”
“More than I could have ever expected to,” is the first thing that comes to mind, but it feels a little too much, so instead you simply say: “I have.”
Eyes igniting with what appears to be confidence, he moves in a little closer, faces still remaining a few inches apart, although the new proximity is daunting. His breath blows against your face, the scent a mixture between the leather and tobacco of the cigars and the bourbon from earlier. It’s a rich combination, warm against your skin in contrast to the cool night air.
His eyes flicker down to your lips, gaze lingering there in a way you know he doesn’t wish to go unseen. He seeks permission, a sign of acceptance before going any further.
As you lean in, it’s slow. His breath grows warmer, and your heart beats within your chest a little faster. His sunken eyes fall shut, and it’s only once your lips connect with his own that you let your own follow suit.
The kiss is melancholic, lazy. Lips dragging slowly against his own, there is no rush as your hand drifts to rest upon his shoulder. His own hand - the one that is not placed against your own on the balcony railing - settles onto your waist. Grip gentle, he pulls you in a little tighter, closing the remaining space between the two of you.
For the first time, it crosses your mind that someone may see you. There are building’s equally as high, the two of you not out of sight from plenty surrounding apartments. You’re in SMY territory, scouts surely something they have strone about the streets, just as you have set up for KQ.
What might SMY’s leader think, if he were to see the two of you now? And why does that prospect excite you more than it scares you?
Other hand finally drifting away from Yeosang’s own, it settles along his jawline, cupping his face as you pull him further into you. He lets you, hand sliding back along the railing as he is pulled closer.
He lets out a groan as your teeth nip at his lower lip, hand gripping your waist a little tighter. The smell of cigar smoke fading as the wind continues to blow it away, the bourbon becomes even more pronounced on his tongue. Flooding your senses, it’s sickeningly sweet, like vanilla and caramel.
Mouth pulling away for a moment, his gaze darts from your own to the skyline, then to the door. “Should we take this inside?” He asks, and you almost want to say no.
“Let them see,” your mind whispers. “It doesn’t matter anyway.”
Perhaps Yeosang’s own cynicism really is rubbing off on you.
Instead, you nod. “Yes,” you murmur, accompanied by a smile that matches his own as his grip remains on your waist, pulling you beside him as you head over towards the door.
Sliding it backwards, it’s only a moment after you hear it click shut behind you that you feel him spin you around towards him, lips crashing back into your own.
What was once lazy becomes messy, as the two of you tumble your way through the narrow hallway. Not bothering to break apart, the two of you become one shared force, a tangled mess of ragged breath and loose limbs that makes its way to what you assume to be his bedroom. It's fortunate now that Yeosang’s apartment is lacking in decorations, as you’d surely be breaking a few of them.
However, despite the lack of decoration, upon entering his bedroom you still manage to crash into something. Knee striking into an object next to the door, it falls heavily as it tumbles to the ground with a loud bang.
Pulling away from him briefly, your gaze scans the floor to see what may have fallen. His grip on your waist remains tight, as he attempts to lean in and kiss you once more, but you don’t let him. When you see what lays on the floor, you pull away entirely.
A suitcase.
But not just the one suitcase that has burst open onto the floor, packed almost entirely full with a mountain of clothes that have begun to spill out upon the hardwood. But rather four suitcases, the other three sitting next to the doorframe, all equally as large. Stuffed to the brim, the zippers appear almost ready to burst.
“Yeosang…” You trail off, gaze narrowing as you stare at the surplus of luggage. You’re certain that those four bags contain more supplies and accessories than his entire apartment. “Are you going somewhere?”
When the only answer you’re met with is his silence, you twist your neck around to face him. You can’t make out his expression, as the room is far too dark and the only light source remains down the hallway, the hanging lamp from within the kitchen. However, you can tell that he’s moved backwards, now a solid few feet away from you, face downcast as his own gaze remains fixated on the floor. He says nothing.
But the silence is more of an answer than any words.
“Are you…” You begin, tone remaining accusatory, even if you try your hardest to keep it soft. “Are you running away?”
Over the course of the night, you have taken Yeosang for many things: A good man discontent with the hand he’s been dealt, someone in need of a change of pace, as well as a new outlook.
But even as all those things, you never took him to be a deserter.
Few who are a part of this life are in love with it. It’s difficult, messy. Full of greed, hurt, and so, so much worse.
But you never, ever leave. It’s not an option, and only a fool would consider it to be.
You never considered Yeosang to be a fool, either.
Once again, you are greeted with silence. Yeosang takes another step back, and as his head shifts upwards, you can tell his gaze has shifted to the suitcases, both hands coming up to run through his long hair. He seems stressed, nervous. Panicked and afraid.
And yet, amongst all that fear, he also seems tired. Defeated, as he lets out a long sigh.
Then he finally speaks.
It’s nothing more than a mumble, and you take a step closer. “What?” You ask, and he finally turns to face you, eyes meeting yours even within the bedroom’s darkness.
“Come with me,” he states, and you choke on nothing but the air in your throat.
“What?” You ask, this time with far more incredulity in your tone, not even attempting to mask the utter shock at the suggestion, or better, plea.
“We’ll go to the mountains,” he says, moving closer to you, and this time it is you who takes a step back. He doesn’t seem to notice, as he instead begins to ramble. “Or the beach. Hell, I’m sure there’s a place with both. We’ll find it, and we’ll go there.”
There’s a desperation to his voice, one that you do not recognize. Never before seen in previous meetings, nor throughout the night, it’s as if you managed to flip some sort of switch. Like a dam breaking, the walls he put up have suddenly come crashing down, and now the flood has come rushing through. All the harboured discontent you’ve noticed far deeper than you ever could have realized.
“Are you crazy?” You ask, and if he takes any offence to the statement, he doesn’t show it. Instead he groans in frustration, turning away from you and walking further into the room. Once again raising his hands to his head, this time he pulls at his hair instead of running them through it.
“No,” he whispers as you move over to his nightstand, switching on the lamp in order to cast even the slightest hint of light into the room. However, now that you’re able to see his expression, you almost wish you hadn’t switched on the light at all, as he just appears so… broken.
Eyes dull, he simply stares at you, shaking his head. “No, I’m not crazy,” he whispers, and although it’s in response to your question, it seems to be more of a reassurance to himself. “I’m not crazy for wanting out, and I’m tired of people acting like I am.”
“Yeosang-” You start, wanting to stop this before it even truly begins, but he interrupts you before you get the chance. His hands loosen their grip on his scalp, and with one of his hands he reaches out, pointing towards you. When he speaks his voice is surprisingly firm.
“You feel the same way I do, don’t lie,” he says, accusatory. “The shit about the city all being the same, fighting being pointless, wanting a bit of insurgence? The beach?”
You shake your head, denying the statement, but he presses further. “That was all you, not me.”
You open your mouth to say something, but no words come out. Not because you are interrupted, but simply because you don’t know what to say.
Because really, he’s right.
Caught up in the moment, his own vigilance and outspoken behaviour seemed to rub off on your own conscience, because those were your ideas. And as much as you want to, you can’t blame them fully on him.
And yet, it doesn’t matter. You will never desert. This is your life, even if there’s a little part of you that wishes it wasn’t. It’s like you told him from the very beginning, there is no point in imagining a life without this - without Duke’s, KQ or SMY - you are simply too wrapped up. He is also too wrapped up, even he’s pretending that he isn’t.
“They’ll find you Yeosang,” you say quietly, shaking your head. “You know that.”
“And so what if they do?” He says, although the anger is slowly dissipating from his voice, as if he’s remembering it’s not you he’s upset with. “At least then I’ll die knowing that I tried.”
A moment of silence passes, and he let’s out a sigh. Shoulder’s sagging slightly, it’s as if you can see the defeat in his posture. His mouth drawn into a thin line, he takes a few steps towards you, hesitant. This time, when he reaches out for your hand, you don’t pull away.
“Come with me,” he asks again, although this time it is not as desperate, as he already knows the answer. “We’re smart, we could make it.”
But you both know that you couldn’t.
Maybe that is why his packed bags have been sitting by his bedroom door for what you imagine have been weeks, the dust collecting beneath them now visible in the lamp-light.
Maybe that is why he let you approach him at Duke’s, brought you here tonight. Knowing he couldn’t stew in this alone, hoping to find someone who shared in his own struggles. Desperate to not be lonesome in this feeling any longer.
But the woman he searches for is not you. He is willing to abandon it all, a brave enough coward. You are neither of those things.
“No,” you say softly, giving his hand a soft squeeze. His lips purse together, clearly disappointed, but he nods in acceptance all the same.
“I’m not the person you want me to be,” you say, looking up to meet his eyes. “I’m not your ideal woman who’s going to come save you from all your discontent. That’s just not me.”
He swallows at this, beginning to pull his hand away, when you stop him. “But,” you begin, your free hand reaching up from your side and settling on the collar of his shirt, fingers resting upon the first button. He stiffens at this. “If you’re looking to lose yourself in something…”
You pull the button through it’s loop, allowing the shirt to fall open slightly, so that the bare of his chest is visible. “Even if only for one night,” you continue, leaning in closer so that you’re only a few inches apart now. His gaze falls down to your lips, and even though he doesn’t move closer, his own fall open in turn.
You let your hand trail down to the next button. You can feel his breath on your face, and it still smells of the cigar smoke. Of the bourbon, of the whisky from back at Duke’s, of the series of poor decisions that brought the two of you to where you are now.
“I can do that for you,” you murmur, voice just barely audible.
Instead of speaking, he leans forward, connecting his lips with your own. And that is answer enough.
It is not slow this time, nor is it not lazy. It’s passionate, furious. He lips seeking yours with a sense of vengeance, a desire to forget himself. Forget KQ and SMY, live a life where they don’t matter.
And for tonight, you can pretend the same.
Hand gripping around the small of your back, he pulls you with him as he makes his way backwards, towards the bed that lays behind him.
He moves to turn the two of you around, so that he can lay you down under him, but you don’t give him the chance. Instead, you take the opportunity to push him backwards, so that it is his own back that presses against the mattress.
Elbows still holding him upwards, his eyes widen in surprise, mouth parting open although no words come out. Seating yourself over top of him, you let you lips drift to his jawbone, sucking gently on the skin. Mouth slowly drifting closed, he let’s out a sharp inhale of air.
He swallows, hard.
You feel as his own hand drifts to slide up beneath your shirt, reaching backwards as to fiddle with the back of your bra strip.
It strikes you now just how wrong this is, how fundamentally taboo it is for you - a higher of KQ - to be fooling around with someone equally as important under SMY. It’s truly unheard of, mostly due to the fact nobody would ever dare to try it.
Yet, here you are, daring.
But right now, you don’t feel daring. You feel tired, frustrated, and desperate. Tired of having these thoughts plague your mind. Frustrated with yourself for letting Yeosang’s own discontent rouse the harboured resentment within you. Desperate to lose yourself in something.
For all of your talk of it being Yeosang who wishes to pretend that reality doesn’t exist for a moment, with the way you press yourself against him with such fervour, it may truly be you who desires to forget it all for one night.
A bit of insurgence.
Closing your eyes, desire burns hotly from within your core. Like smoke from a burning wildfire, it spreads quickly as a haze over your mind, and it’s exactly what you’ve wanted.
And for one night, the two of you pretend.
     ~~~~
When you wake up, it’s in darkness.
Sweat beeding against your forehead, you blink a few times, eyelids sticky as you attempt to remember where you are. Shifting upwards, you realize that an arm hangs over the back of your figure, fingertips brushing against your naked stomach.
Right.
Yeosang’s chest is pressed up against your back, breathing slow and melodic as he sleeps soundly. Lips brushing against you shoulder, the contact makes you still, as if the weight of what you’ve just done finally settles into reality.
You don’t regret it, the night truly being everything you needed, but an inkling of guilt creeps into your mind all the same. Chewing on the bottom of your lip, you slide one of your ankles out from beneath the sheets, and are immediately shocked by the coolness of the bedroom air.
Slipping it back under, you give yourself a moment to prepare. Yeosang is warm, the bed cozy, and you know you’d be far more comfortable letting yourself fall back into sleep.
But that was never the plan.
Gently pulling his hand from it’s place over your waist, you are careful not to rouse him awake as you slide out from beside him. Shivering slightly, you search around the room for your top, your eyes not having adjusted to the dim light.
You find it, along with your jeans, on Yeosang’s side of the bed. Slipping them on as quietly as possible, before tiptoeing your way out of the bedroom, you do not allow yourself a spare glance backwards.
Making your way down the hallway and into the kitchen, you make quick work as you immediately head towards the drawer where he’d kept his cigars. Or more specifically in your interest, was stuffed full of documents.
Sifting through them, your eyes scan over the headlines. There are orders describing the details of past and future shipments, profile’s for different SMY members, printed out emails that surely may hold a level of importance.
But they aren’t what you came here for tonight.
You find it near the very bottom, sliding it out from it’s place beneath the pile and holding it before you. The document reads: “Northern Warehouse: Floorplan and Security”.
Jackpot.
It’s what you need for retaliation. SMY took out one of your warehouses, so the only appropriate response would be to take down one of their own, specifically the one known to have the most prevalent meth lab inside, as well as most populated security.
Fight fire with fire, as Hongjoong had put it. If they bring you a battle, counter them with a war.
Taking the document, you fold it in half before reaching for your purse that still sits on the kitchen countertop, slipping it inside. Your phone screen is already alight from within the pocket you’d stuffed it in, buzzing only slightly since you’d left it on silent mode.
Pulling it out, you finally check the notifications you’d purposely ignored, and the screen is flooded with messages from Hongjoong.
Hongjoong (9:24pm): You at Duke’s yet?
Missed call from Hongjoong.
Hongjoong (9:48pm): Hello?
Hongjoong (10:10pm): Fine. Just let me know when you’re on your way to his place.
Hongjoong (12:13am): You on your way there?
Hongjoong (12:28am): Listen, I know you were iffy on this. Be mad at me, whatever. But don’t leave me in the dark.
You roll your eyes.
Hongjoong (12:56am): I’m assuming you found it?
Hongjoong (1:15am): Is he out?
At this your hand mindlessly drifts into your bag, settling on a small linear bottle hidden within one of the side-pockets. Pulling it out, you twist the bottle within your hand, the white powder within falling from side to side as you do so, like sand within an hour glass.
This had been the original plan for when you got to his place. Slip it in his drink, knock him out, find the papers and leave.
But you knew you were never going to do that from the minute you sat down next at him at Duke’s
Hongjoong (2:13am): You’re starting to worry me, this is seriously fucking petty.
Hongjoong (2:45am): You got an hour to text me back or I’m sending someone out there.
However, what starts as a worried concern quickly shifts, and you can’t help but snort.
Hongjoong (3:17am): You’re fucking him, aren’t you?
It’s almost humorous. He speaks with anger, as if you owe him any sort of loyalty. He slept with a waitress at Duke’s just last week, and a girl from your Southern District a month earlier. You don’t really remember the one before that, but you’re pretty sure she had a tattoo of a crane on the back of her shoulder, at least that’s what you saw when she was leaving his office.
The two of you aren’t together, so if he wants to be mad at you for fucking someone else, he needs to reflect on his own history first.
And maybe he is starting to, as he seems to think better of it.
Hongjoong (3:22am): Don’t answer that.
Missed Call from Hongjoong.
Hongjoong (3:26am): Please call me back. I just need to know you’re alive.
Letting out a sigh, you know you can’t keep him in radio silence any longer. You can tell that even with his jealousy, he’s genuinely worried, and if the roles were reversed you would want a response just the same.
You (3:36am): I got it. On my way back.
You’re about to leave, slipping your jacket on and heading towards the door, when something stops you. You sigh, knowing it’s stupid, but you find yourself lightly tredding back down the hallway, towards Yeosang’s bedroom.
Peaking inside, you hang in the doorframe for a moment. Feeling a ghost of the person you were just a few hours ago, you can’t bring yourself to leave, like an apparition tied to the room.
Despite yourself, his offers hangs within your mind.
“Come with me,” he asks again, although this time it is not as desperate, as he already knows the answer. “We’re smart, we could make it.”
It’s dumb, and you’re well aware of that, but you can’t help but imagine what might happen if you said yes. If you shook him awake right now, stuffed the items back into his suitcase and left everything behind.
Desert it all, escape the hamster wheel. No more immoral shit like this, no more planning the murder of the SMY members during operations, no more of this toxic endless cycle of an almost-relationship you’ve gotten yourself wrapped up in with your boss.
But even if you managed to leave it all, would it ever really leave you?
You’ve done too much to turn your back on this life now. You’re too tainted. This is your job. It’s what you’re good at, because really, it’s all you’ve ever done. Unlike Yeosang, you aren’t someone brave enough to dream of anything else, to chase after what may lay beyond the boundaries of this city.
You swallow deeply, trying to shake off both the pain and guilt that rests upon your shoulders. Smoothing out your jacket, you watch him for only a moment longer, how his arm drapes over the spot where your figure had just been. He smiles when he sleeps.
Turning around, you make your way back down the hallway and towards the door. Slipping on your heels, you don’t close the door completely when you leave, as not to wake him.
Making your way down the apartment complex hallway, you still smell of the cigar smoke. The bourbon and the whisky. Like sex and longing. Like regret.
You’re afraid a shower won’t be enough to wash that away.
Sending a quick text to Hongjoong, you ask him to send you a car, this area of the city still entirely foreign to you.
When you make it out of the apartment building, it has begun to snow. The first of the season. You pay no mind, you feel cold enough already. And even as you stare down the street, waiting for the car to pick you up to take you back to your real life, your mind does not leave Yeosang.
You blink, and your eyes water for the first time in as long as you can recall. Funny, you thought you were immune to the trials of the job at this point, your plots no longer containing the power to phase you. Apparently, there is a line to this however, and you have managed to cross it.
Eventually, the car comes, a long and jet-black vehicle with tinted windows. When you settle into the back seat, the driver immediately sets the car in motion. You stare out your own window, eyes drifting up towards the top of the building, knowing that in one of those rooms Yeosang sleeps. Unaware.
You sigh.
You can only hope SMY doesn’t kill him when they discover where KQ found the floorplan.
~~~~~
thanks for reading!!
here are my ateez and skz masterlists for your convenience, and feel free to come chat with me about any of your thoughts if you enjoyed. i hope to see you around :3
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chaoticbuka · 11 months
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Chapter 5 Wait for Me VashMeryl Fic
A/N: Meryl and Vash finally reunite in this chapter!
Revising the draft I had originally posted on A03. Here is the new and improved chapter.
Trigun Stampede Fic with eventual VashMeryl ship. Post-ep 12 with Trigun Maximum spoilers embedded
Chapter 1 here
Chapter 2 here
Chapter 3 here
Chapter 4 here
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Being the only woman among three men had been a challenge to say the least. There were times when she had to awkwardly explain why she needed to stop to take care of her business again and again, something that left her feeling embarrassed and frustrated. Despite her initial discomfort, the guys eventually learned to ask fewer questions and let her do her thing.
But with Milly, her new partner, there was no need for explanations or uncomfortable silences. They shared a mutual understanding of the struggles of staying hygienic and hydrated on the road. Their conversation was animated by laughter and commiseration about finding a decent bathroom or shower. They traded tips on how to stretch their water and food supplies, and shared stories of their past misadventures.
As they traveled together, Meryl felt a growing sense of comradery with Milly. They faced unexpected challenges and obstacles together, from getting lost in a maze of dirt roads to narrowly avoiding a run-in with a territorial swarm of worms. But each challenge brought them closer, and they became each other's confidants and supporters.
Sure, there were still moments when Meryl missed the familiarity of traveling with Roberto, but she couldn't deny that having another woman by her side made the journey more enjoyable, and brought a new level of understanding and connection to their shared experiences.
"So you think this rumor might actually be Mr. Vash this time, Meryl?" The tall and chirpy Milly asked looking towards the horizon hoping to see a town appear any moment. 
"I doubt it Milly. Vash isn't a womanizer and these rumors are thick with tales of this bandit kidnapping young women. But maybe…maybe the real Vash will be there trying to stop the pretender." 
"Your Mr. Vash sounds a lot nicer than the one I've heard about growing up." 
"Mi-MINE? He's not mine!" Meryl was red and flustered as she tried to correct Milly's phrasing. 
"Meryl lookout!!" Meryl's heart raced as she slammed on the brake, her eyes glued to the road. The car skidded to a halt just inches away from two figures lying motionless in the scorching desert sand. Her hands trembled as she fumbled for the door handle, her mind racing with fear and confusion. Were these people dead? Had they been attacked?
She stumbled out of the car, her eyes frantically scanning the faces of the two strangers. As she knelt down beside them, she felt a sudden jolt of recognition that made her heart skip a beat. It couldn't be... but it was. The blond hair, the gentle eyes, the familiar contours of his face. Vash.
Her mind went into overdrive as she tried to process the overwhelming flood of emotions that threatened to consume her. Shock, relief, joy, anger, confusion... they all swirled around inside her like a tornado, leaving her feeling dizzy and disoriented.
Milly's urgent voice cut through the chaos. "Water! They need water!"
Meryl sprang into action, her hands shaking as she fumbled with the canteen. She felt a strange mix of tenderness and frustration as she watched Vash drink, his parched lips softening under the cool liquid. His eyes remained closed, a flicker of relief spread across his sunburned face, and it made her heart ache with a fierce longing that she couldn't quite explain.
Finally, he opened his eyes, and the world around her faded away. The intensity of his gaze was like a physical force, drawing her in and making her feel like she was drowning in a sea of emotion. "Oh," he whispered, and she felt her heart skip a beat.
"Oh?" she repeated, her voice barely above a whisper. 
"Oh. Oh?! Oh!” She jumped up, dropping Vash’s head with a thud on the sand, “Oh my God! What are you two doing out here?! Were you two just walking across No Man's Land like dumb asses with a death wish? Where are your tomas?"
"Nice to see you too, shorty," Wolfwood wheezed, still in bad shape from the desert sun. Meryl rounded on Nicholas with a fury. 
"Ugh, don't get me started with you. I have half a mind to leave you here after the shit you pulled," venom dripped as she jabbed her finger into his chest. 
"Meryl!" Milly gasped, her eyes wide with shock. She knew her mentor had a temper, but surely she wasn't actually going to leave either of these men. Especially since she seemed to know them so well. Milly looked at the men. The cross. The blond-haired man with kind eyes. There was no mistake. These were the pair they had spent the last several months hoping to find. 
“Isn’t it wonderful, Meryl! We finally found them! We can’t just leave them in the desert,” Milly stood and reached for the cross to load it into the car.
"Easy there big girl, you're gonna hurt yourself trying to lift that thing," Wolfwood cautioned, trying to pull himself up to stop her.
"It's no problem Mr. Undertaker sir. I got it," and she did. She loaded up his cross and returned to help him into the backseat despite his loud but useless protests.
Vash got to his feet and placed a gentle hand on Meryl's head, she closed her eyes, savoring the sensation of his touch. "You found me again," he said, his voice heavy with emotion. She felt a fierce protectiveness welling up inside her as she opened her eyes to take him in, her fingers brushing gently against his shirt to make sure he was actually there. It was like she was seeing him for the first time, really seeing him, and the realization made her heart swell with a strange mix of joy and sadness.
Chapter 6 here
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runningfrompirates · 4 months
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I wrote a collection of poetry for my 299 environmental science class Climate Change in Film and Literature.
Its a Onceler x Lorax Destiel fic kind of, its very transformative. anyway, I'm pretty happy with maybe half of the poems, you can read them here.
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sarahrogersevans · 1 year
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They’re Not Dating- Sebastian Stan xreader fan fic
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Summary: Sebastian and reader are best friends & they are working on a movie and during a lunch break a co Star finds them napping together and something unexpected happens with Seb and reader
Warnings: none really, just angst and fluff with soft Sebastian
(Sebastian’s POV)
“I felt a warm feeling against my body which made me smile but then I heard laughter which then I frowned.”
I woke up and heard my co Star Anthony Mackie laughing & say “hey sleepyhead I see you two lovebirds got cozy, hey Chris! Come over here.” I rolled my eyes and said “oh hey Mackie.” I saw my other co Star Chris evans walk over and he smiled and said “aww you two are cute Sebastian.” He took a picture of us and I said “shhh guys come on don’t wake up Y/N ok? We were tired and needed a nap and we’re not dating by the way before you ask.” Chris and Anthony laughed and Antony said “yea right Sebastian come on you two are cuddled up against each other I’m pretty sure you guys are dating plus you two are always flirting.”
The two guys left thankfully and she’s still asleep oh she looks so cute like this. I guess I never thought about it, I got my phone out to see if I had any messages and I saw notifications about rumors about Y/N and I being a couple from different sites and I kinda do have a crush on her but never did anything. Oh she’s waking up! I smiled at her and said “hey doll how was your nap you doing ok?” I rubbed her back and she got nervous and said “oh!.. was I sleeping on your chest? I’m- I’m sorry Sebastian, I hope I didn’t make you feel uncomfortable?..” I shook my head and said “hey hey no not at all it’s ok Y/N don’t you worry ok? I didn’t mind it and in fact I liked having you close to me if I can be honest hon.?”
————— Y/N’s POV———
I honestly don’t remember how I ended up laying on Sebastian’s chest because all I remember is that we were both sleepy and we were gonna take a nap and I kinda thought I heard someone talking but I might have dreamed that. Then when I woke up suddenly I found myself laying on my best friend’s chest. Goodness I’m blushing and he’s giving me that adorable smile of his. Sebastian noticed I hadn’t said anything in a minute or two and rubbed my arm and said “Y/N hey you ok? You know I’m not upset right? It’s ok sweetheart you don’t have to move away come here.” I smiled at him feeling shy and I thought for a minute what to say and I said “hey Seb.. did someone come in the room at any point because I thought I heard someone talking earlier but maybe I dreamed that.”
Sebastian put his arm around me and started to play with my hair a bit and said “oh, yea actually while you were asleep Chris and Anthony came in and saw us napping together and teased me and Chris took a picture of us and said “oh how sweet! I’m sending this to our group chat.” “I told them to leave us be don’t worry.” I felt embarrassed but I knew Seb would protect me if anything happened. He saw me hide my face in my hands and said “oh doll face hey it’s ok Y/N don’t hide your face it’s nothing to be embarrassed about, can I see those pretty eyes of yours?” At first I shook my head no but he uncovered my face and smiled at me and said “there she is hi you, can I ask you something?” I started to panic a bit but said “yea, sure..” Sebastian breathed for a minute and said “ok so, do you like me doll? Because I really like you and seeing you cuddled up by me laying on my chest made me realize it more and when we were filming and I played your boyfriend I realized I was in love with you but I wasn’t sure how you felt.”
I was taken by surprise but then I thought about all the moments we had hanging out and the movie we’re doing and how I always want him close to me and our late night phone calls and I smiled and said “ok truth is Sebastian yea I’m in love with you.. I thought about all the moments we’ve shared and how you always take care of me and our laughs together and our phone conversations, I don’t wanna be without you. I hope I’m not being too forward here.” Seb smiled and cupped my face in his hands and said “doll face I had been feeling the same way there’s no one else I’d rather spend my time with and personally I loved having you cuddled up next to me. So to do this right, will oh well before I start I just saw on my phone that there were a bunch of rumor articles about us possibly dating and I saw a really cute selfie of us and right away seeing your sweet smile it makes my days brighter Y/N, we’ve known each other for years and I think we’d make a cute couple, what do you think?” I nodded and I was smiling so much from falling more in love with this sweet wonderful guy who’s been my crush for five years. I laid my head on his chest and said “I love you Sebastian Stan.” Sebastian lifted my chin up with his thumb and leaned to kiss me and said “I love you too Y/N L/N I adore my pretty girl so much you have no idea.” I couldn’t believe this happened after so many times of us denying the rumors of us dating and now it’s true.
Hey lovelies!! 😊♥️♥️ I got this idea from a YouTube video I listened to and thought the ideas for this fic was really cute, enjoy 🥰xx
Taglist:
@lokiandbuckysdoll @jessybarnes
@chrisevansdaughter
@writersblog20
@delicatecoffeepeanut
@anotherfuckingmarvelfanaccount
@nana1000night
@marvelstarker-mha98
@sunshine-on-my-mind
@vrittivsanghavi
@imyourbratzdoll
If I forget to tag anyone please let me know xx
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