#anyway harold big brain

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Stolen Goods 2

Warnings: noncon and other dark elements. As usual, be mindful of your content consumption.

Ft. Lloyd Hansen, petite!pregnant reader

I also beg of you to leave me some tuppence in the form of a comment and/or reblog. You are cherished!

Enjoy, my loverlies.

You go through checkout in autopilot. You pay, not paying mind to the total, and a bag boy helps get the bags in your cart. You’re still trembling from the encounter at the bread shelf. You’re starting to think you imagined it. Can pregnancy hormones make you delusional? 

As you push your cart out to the lot, you feel a chafing against your thighs. Your panties are still askew. You slow as you near the car and peek around to fix them. A shiver rolls over you at the brush of fabric across your pelvis. 

What are you doing? You should march back in there and demand the surveillance footage. You should call the police and file a report. It’s not about them believing you, they’ll have to see it on the cameras, right? 

You’re kept from your moment of clarity by the buzz of your phone. Shoot. You answer as Jake’s name flashes over the screen.  

“Hey,” you wisp you as you keep hold of the cart, hovering just next to the trunk of the car, “did I forget to put something on the list?” 

“Checking in. Been there a while,” he says. You can hear him typing as he speaks. He’s always so busy, even when he’s at home. If he isn’t logged into work, he’s up to some coding of his own. You suppose he’s trying to get as much in before the baby comes. “So, you almost done?” 

“Yeah, yeah,” you try not to let your voice quaver, “just packing up the bags now. How’d your meeting with Harold go?” 

“Usual. That big project we’ve been working at? Got scrapped. Starting over,” he scoffs. 

“Oh, I’m sorry, Jake,” you pout as you reach into your purse and fish out the car keys. You pop the trunk and angle the cart so it won’t roll away. “I think I might get that promotion though.” You lift a bag and puff out as you balance the cell between cheek and shoulder, dropping it in the trunk, “Terra’s leaving so...” 

“Babe, I told you to wait until I finished work,” he sniffs, “you okay?” 

“Yeah, I didn’t get anything too heavy. Jake, it’s fine.” 

“Mm, I feel like... like you don’t let me do enough,” he whines. 

Your lips slant. You won’t let the hormones loosen your tongue. He has every opportunity to help. He could do the shopping himself but he says he needs you to make sure he gets the right things. He could cook dinner but he burns everything. He could clean the dishes but he breaks at least one thing each time. 

“You can rub my back?” You suggest, “or my feet.” 

“Mm, yeah,” he agrees noncommittally. Right, he’ll only do that if he gets a bit of fun after. 

“Anyway, we’ll talk when I get there. I don’t want the ice cream to melt,” you lean on the cart and hold back a sigh, “love ya.” 

“Mm, huh, yeah, you too. Gareth’s calling.” 

He hangs up and leaves you listening to dead air. You drop your shoulders and shove the phone back in your purse. You shake your head and move around the basket to grab another bag. A pair of thick arms beat you to it and you step back as a man in a yellow polo smirks down at you. 

“What’s a lady like you doing all the heavy lifting for?” The man asks. 

His timbre hits you like a train off its tracks. Your pregnancy brain unfogs and you remember what you’d meant to do before the phone call. You feel the scene back in the store, the creep of his hand under your dress. That voice. It’s definitely him. 

You gape at him as he steps close, hugging a bag to his stomach, and you back away in horror. His hair is combed back on top, his sides shaved close, and his lip is trimmed with a thick mustache. Despite his clean shave, a shadow already darkens his jawline.

Your heart hammers wildly and your whole body tingles. He steps around the cart and places the bag in the trunk. You touch your stomach as you try to calm yourself.

“Get away from me,” you murmur. 

“I’m just being helpful, sweet cheeks. You should know, I’m not really the type to help an old lady cross the street or whatever shit,” he snorts and faces you. 

“Go,” you rasp hotly as your eyes tinge. “Get away!” 

“Now, don’t go shrieking like a banshee. I’m really not into the whole...” he makes a motion in front of his stomach, “baby thing, but you’re convincing me.” 

“I said--” 

“I’m not done,” he points at you, “so keep your ears open, sugar tits.” He gives a leer at your chest, “now those... that’s amazing. You gone up a cup size or were they always honkers?” 

“Ew, you--” you try to accuse him and he taps your lips, stunning you to silence. 

As he comes closer, his size is even more obvious. Everyone’s big compared to you, he’s probably about the same height as your fiance, but he seems broader. Maybe because he’s older? 

“I’m just being a good Samaritan,” he looms over you, “helping you get your shopping all away.” He grins down at you and brings up two fingers, giving them a sniff, “getting you off--” 

“You--” 

"...your feet," he finishes.

He’s quicker than you. Your voice dissolves as he has you by the neck in and instant, your keys and purse falling to the tarmac. Your top-heavy stature has you off-balance without much of a struggle and you barely keep your side from hitting the open edge of the trunk. He bends and scoops up your leg, pushing you to roll onto the groceries and land uncomfortably against the emergency kit. 

“Hey!” You cry out and he snaps the lid shut. He slaps it and gives a cackle loud enough for you can hear. You hold your stomach, terrified that you landed too hard on your side.

“I only came for milk, imagine that.” 

[jeezybipsman]

Hello! Could you write something about Harry being teased about his stutter by the boys and is now kinda embarrassed to speak to the reader? Like fluffy/comforting fluff <3

I LOVE this!

Warnings: swearing/talks of sex

Sorry if this is short! My first imagine :)

—- —————————————————————————————————————————————-

“Okay Harry, what do you think.”

It was a Wednesday, Harry was surrounded by his best mates, laughters bouncing off the walls of the enclosed space as they filmed for side+. He wasn’t a natural at things like this, he struggled with being honest, it wasn’t his thing.

“W-what’s the t-t-t-topic boys?”

Giggles circled the room as Simon, Jj and Ethan sat laughing like school boys in the mics.

“Fuck me Harold, why are you bad with words?”

“Uh”

“How come your all flustered man?”

“Are you horny bro? Are you wanking?”

The boys threw questions at him, making the poor boys mind go cloudy.

“S-s-s-s-sorry.”

The boys were finding it hilarious, thinking Harry was all flustered, when in reality he was only thinking of what you both wanted for tea.

“Anyways” Simon tried to move on, already bored of Harry’s stutter as they were often used to it.

——— — - - ————————————————————————————————————————————

It was late, you were sat all cosy in your bed with your favourite snacks, patiently waiting for your lover to waltz through them doors and into your arms.

“Hi Y/N,” the room was quiet, a shy man stood at your shared bedroom door. Sadness displayed across his face as he flops onto the bed.

“Why the long face bog?” You were genuinely confused, it was easy for you to read Harry, you knew him well and reckoned you had every mood he struck onto his face engraved in your brain.

Silence.

“Harry?”

More silence filled your room as you focused your attention on him.

He edged closer, until he repositioned himself on top of you, head buried on your chest as he held you tight. Still not daring to say a thing.

You didn’t know what to do in this situation, did you help him? Did you leave him alone? Your hands moved to his head, scratching it as your other hand nestled into his hair.

“I-I wasn’t really concentrated t-today, the boys.” He breathed like he’d ran a marathon, clearly out of breath from talking.

“What did the boys do Harold?”

“T-they laughed, called me fl-flustered, Jj reckoned i was horny” he giggled, you smiled. Hearing his little laugh made you go funny inside, it made you warm.

“Just chill out, stay calm and slow down with your words, you know your too clever for your big mouth.”

You felt his lips raise on your chest, knowing he was smiling at you.

“You know I don’t care how you speak, your my best friend and my boyfriend and your stutter makes you perfect, I don’t want a clever clogs with a professional speaking voice. I want w2s and his stutter, because that’s what makes me happy.”

“What would I do without you ay?”

“I reckon you’d stutter your way through life my boy.”

— ————————————————————————————————————————-

It was now Friday, you still hasn’t had much conversation with Harry, clearly too bothered about the boys, you knew he felt bad.

But as you walked through the kitchen, a goofy man with a huge smile and the biggest bunch of roses you’d ever seen was stood waiting for you.

“I know I don’t tell you enough. But I love you, I’m sorry I’m bad at communicating, I try, All for you.”

“All for me?”

“All for you, always and forever for you.”

[taldigi]

Was thinking about the Canon meeting Retransmission Au stuff and I got to wondering, what do you think would be either the funniest or most interesting, like, dynamic between Canon and au? I'm highkey in love with how you portray the characters ngl, and Retransmission has taken over a part of my brain I think o>

Thank you! When people are excited about my aus it makes me excited about my aus!

Here's some dynamics- but feel free to ask or make up some more. RT!Yukiko and C!RIse: honestly, I think they sneak off together and make out. *looks at nails* I can't control the lesbians, Harold- they do as (and who) they please.

RT!Naoto and C!Kanji: Weirded out by "Yukiko-favored Kanji" but thinks he's really cool. They sit and knit for a bit and talk.

RT!Yosuke and C!Chie: He lacks the foot in mouth disease- so he can chat evenly with Chie.. which kinda freaks her out, since uncanny valley and all... but they both care very much about their respective Yukikos and are able to bond and gossip a bit about both.

RT!Yosuke and C!Yu: Is noticeably flustered whenever leader voice happens. He can peep out a "yes sir" as a treat.

RT!Yu and C!Teddie: Teddie is SO thrilled about meeting someone just like him, especially since it's Yu! Teddie proudly postures a "big brother" energy, which Myu is happy to entertain- because he's also happy to meet another living mascot.

RT!Yu and C!Kanji: Just like canon Yu, he's able to coax out Kanji's enthusiasm about hobbies. Kanji gifts him a knit fish, which Myu is thrilled about. (RT!Teddie later suggests stuffing it with Catnip and Myu dismisses it... but does so anyway after the whole thing is over.)

RT!Kanji and C!Kanji: Rivalry(Friendly!) and they talk and debate about fabric and such. RT!Kanji is impressed that C!Kanji can knit (since he can't)

[sreppub]

Ah man, so Booster and Ted were on basically the same “Loser” Justice League, then and Guy Gardener and Fire&Ice (Harold they are lesbians!). They were 2 silly besties for decades

Booster was a washed up footballer that became a security guard and wanted his fame back so he said fuck it, and stole the tech he was guarding to go back and time and use the tech to be a super hero and get fame&fortune&babes. That’s why he’s a loser

Ted is a normal guy with gadgets, he’s actually Blue Beetle the 2nd, the first one had an “ancient” (actually alien tech) artifact that Ted couldn’t make work after BB 1 died. He’s a less successful Bruce Wayne in the business world and he’s very has money-> has no money-> got money-> oh no it’s gone! kinda business man iirc. And since he’s quippy and like a less powerful Batman he’s considered C-tier at best in universe

So of course when DC went all grime dark for a minute…

SPOILERS!

They have Max Lord (the silly team’s support character with some weak mind control powers and lost of money and business man stuff) turn out to be BIG BAD behind the scenes, shoot Ted in the head and murder him when Ted finds out he’s evil*! Ted had been trying to investigate some weird going ones and no one was listening to him, not even his bestie Booster so he goes it alone and dies.

*(Max had created a backdoor into Superman’s brain slowly over years! Now he’s controlling Supes! Oh no he’s made Superman think Diana (who has found out and confronted him) is Doomsday and has killed Lois!

*insert actually vry cool Wonder Woman vs Superman fight that goes into SPACE! WW slices Supe’s throat with her magic tiara at one point!*

Diana gets away from the fight and stops Max by getting her lasso on him and asking “how do I stop you?” And Max has to answer truthfully and says“you’ll have to kill me” and Diana goes “ok” and snaps his neck right then and there. Clark and Bruce don’t talk to Diana for like a year after that because she was like No I Am Not Sorry You Guys Are Being Babies)

Anyway. Now Ted is dead! And then Blue Beetle 3, Jaime Reyes (who is a big sweetie and amazing, he’s the BB the recent movie is based off of) is introduced and is a Big Hit. So they “can’t” bring back Ted says the Editorial, his sacrifice has to mean something!!!

And now a very sad Booster gets his own series where a future relative of Booster is all “ok Booster it turns out you become a Time Cop and have to help repair the time line from other time travellers/anomalies and you are a big important hero in the future just like you always wanted BUT no one can EVER know you were or else some evil time traveller will erase you from time so you have to pretend to be a loser still” aka the antithesis of why he became a “hero” in the first place. And Booster of course tries to save Ted and they reunite and it’s so happy but Time Shenanigans keep happening and it’s like “no Ted has to die and stay dead or else” and Booster refuses to loose Ted ever again but Ted goes and sacrifices himself to save the timeline and Booster has to watch him go and it’s very sad. But I think they recently brought him back again? It’s been a minute but Ted’s been Dead for a while

End spoilers

And that's what I missed on glee!

Thanks for explaining it for me :)

[real-total-drama-takes]

https://www.tumblr.com/real-total-drama-takes/731464074454597632/im-sick-of-ride-the-cyclone-aus-that-cast-noah-as

I don’t want to extensively rant about AUs on here but I’m sure there’s a big enough intersection between TD fans and RTC fans right. Anyway yeah this take is pretty true sorry sugdbdbjshdjdsjb but there’s reasons for it being a constant

In seriousness, I’m trying to think of who in gen 1 (or even anyone in TD?) would fit as Noel, bc Noel has a very specific character niche even if he just seems like The Gay One. He romanticizes nihilism to a comical extent where his dream is to like, die alone in a French alley from typhoid fever. Like that’s appealing to him. Who the fuck would want to do that ever.

Noah works best for the silly one liner insults Noel does (I also think ‘you challenged my notion that all gay dudes are fun to be around’ would be like the best way to describe him) but I’m genuinely lost here lmfao. Izzy is actually pretty into acting and being dramatic and probably would fantasize about living some kind of insane life like that, but that’s stretching one part of her character to an extreme. I think it could work if you played your cards right though. That’s all I’ve got there bud, hope you find your dream AU one day and if I read any more Noah-centric takes my brain will explode into mush

My second take here is that I would keep Courtney as Constance and have Gwen be Constance, bc while the personalities of Gwen and Constance are 100% different, a) Constance and Ocean’s dynamic isn’t going to click if it’s just like. Fuckin Beth or something? And b) Gwen would totally have that moment that is Jawbreaker, cuz she’s The Loner, her whole life she’s probably been avoiding getting attached to people or things or even just like letting herself let loose and enjoy life, and I think her death being what opens her eyes to the world around her would be fucking awesome

Harold is literally just Ricky in a past life or something though if you choose anyone else you’re kidding yourself

.

[solar-halos]

this is my most embarrassing post yet but it has to be said

please everyone don’t think less of me for not only thinking about this au but also having so many of the details planned out please. please. but in my defense it’s 1am and i’m showing no signs of going to sleep anytime soon so now i am subjecting u to every single thought i’ve ever had. ok i need to stop stalling here’s what’s been on my mind lately:

total drama/hg au. like total drama island but with characters from the hunger games

yes ive watched total drama island. yes i continue to re-watch total drama island as an adult. yes i do lurk on the tag. yes my brain is theoretically getting more and more developed by the day 😔😔 anyway let me tell u which character would be which

• ok i know it would be so easy to say that annie and finnick are bridgette and geoff cos they’re beachy surfers obsessed with pda, but that’s so predictable. also i don’t even think they’re that big on pda. also duncan and courtney are literally peak so i think that’s why i feel so strongly about this, but like, finnick is so obviously courtney coded. like being so people please-y and diplomatic on the surface but then lowkey being a type a control freak as the game goes on and then annie is there being a rebel without a cause and it rubs of on him. like at the end of the day duncan and courtney are the same ppl but different font and i think that works very well with odesta. also i love bridgette and geoff but oh my god those mfs don’t argue. not like i imagine odesta to argue

• ok enough about odesta. lets talk about everlark. i know this is so basic but katniss needs to be gwen like god INTENDED. like this antisocial little weirdo (gwen) who has a heart of gold and everyone knows it but her. s1 gwen/trent was so sappy and corny and normal up until The Kiss and love me hate me say what u want about me but i liked it. like wayyy more than duncan and gwen bc that ship is just like “what if a boy and girl got together” like they weren’t similar at all they just both wore black. anyway i love black cat and golden retriever pairings and that is so everlark to me. peeta literally would carry a boulder for katniss

• heather is so clove. lindsay is so glimmer. case closed

• this works especially well bc (and i know im jumping ahead in the series lore) cato is so alejandro. and tyler is so marvel. i don’t personally ship them that much but i know its definitely a Thing so it works out nicely

• beetee is harold 😭😭 the main total drama cast is so huge that’s it’d be kinda impossible to keep the characters within a similar age range but i’m kinda obsessed with Teenager Beetee. he would so commit voter fraud

• also i know it’s basic to say that johanna would be eva but like. eva literally allied with a fucking nerd she hated the fuck outta and some certified weirdo no one rlly fucked w. that’s so cf-core

honestly i don’t have as many thoughts on this as i thought. for some reason i don’t personally like having snow in more modern au things, so i think chris mcclean would still be chris mcclean. that’s the only thing that stays the same it’s still s1 of total drama island so its not a crossover chris mcclean just transcends fandom spaces. haymitch can def be chef hatchet tho

anyway i’m getting rlly embarrassed again, so bye

[mlobsters]

supernatural s11e11 into the mystic (w. robbie thompson)

giving credit where it's due, i think the show has been doing a good job picking licensed work, especially when not stuck to a particular genre. enjoyed here will you love me tomorrow by the shirelles

okay that monster is uh. something. don't eat the baby!! poor sweet thing.

LUCIFER When your brother was trapped in Purgatory you were here with a girl and a dog. You can't win this, Sam. You're just not strong enough. You didn't even bother trying to find him. And I know that if you're gonna beat the Darkness, you have to be ready to watch the people you love die.

i'd say don't let lucifer get to you, sam - but hell. i spiral over the smallest of social interactions, let alone the big evil angel who knows all my weak spots and is pushing the sorest ones for maximum manipulation. also where is the light coming from in his room with the pattern, he doesn't have a window? is it a weird lampshade? nightlight? scented plugin nightlight?? 🤪

everything's fine! been up who knows how long cleaning my gun, per yoozh

DEAN You okay? SAM Yeah, I'm fine. DEAN Are you sure? 'Cause you haven't left the bunker in days. SAM I'm fine.

I'M ACES, DEAN.

cas will be fine! which brings about the question, what's crowley doing in all this? i know he declared the team-up over, but no heads up about lucifer being out? is he incapacitated in some way?

(kinda wishing we had pellegrino to still be lucifer but i get it)

DEAN Maybe we ought to make a reservation. SAM Yeah, we should be so lucky to live long enough.

did know about this. don't be sad, don't be sad.

SAM Turns out Harold was stealing the other residents' Viagra. DEAN I know. A real dick move, huh?

cmon sammy, not even a chuckle? that was a good (bad) one :P

dean pocketing some viagra, all right.

(wiki) According to a tweet by writer Robbie Thompson, Dean stealing the Viagra was unscripted, and was ad-libbed by Jensen Ackles.

gosh that's pretty. what a lovely profile shot of sam

DEAN So no retirement, huh? SAM Hey, you're the one who's always wanted to go out blaze of glory style preferably while the Bon Jovi song is playing. DEAN I'm a candle in the wind. Yeah, but the way you said it, it was like that blaze of glory was gonna happen sooner rather than later.

lip service to the blaze of glory when it looks like all is lost but of course he wants to grow old together.

DEAN Are you okay? SAM No, I'm not, actually. Not at all. Being so close to Lucifer again, that... Brought stuff up. Stuff I thought I forgot about. DEAN You want to talk about it? SAM No. DEAN Well, look. Lucifer is never getting out of that cage, ever. And you are never going back, period. So... Case closed.

💔on all accounts

SAM Let's burn the bones so we can go home.

at least the bunker's home now

DEAN Gold blade. I don't have any in the trunk, so I got to head back to the bunker and grab a couple. You stay here and figure out who in this place is vulnerable.

someone vulnerable, like say, sam??

all this banshee talk makes me miss lydia from teen wolf. def the good kind of banshee though, no brain munching to be found

after hours of staring at 1968-1970 ford galaxies i see how similar they are to the impala lol

blarrgh dean is gonna unload his amara secrets to lucifer!cas, fucking great. always anyone but sam

DUDE. how had i never stumbled into this?? so i'm looking up mildred's actress dee wallace, and she was the mom in E.T.!! but!!! the little boy, elliott! is the dude in all the flanagan stuff - young hugh crain in hill house, henry in bly manor. mind blown LOL. that movie devastated me as a child and i haven't watched it since haha (which reminds me i was talking to my very sensitive 10 year old about charlotte's web and i was like, wasn't it sad? and he's like. eh. me: really? not sad?? him: ehh. LOL okay! i'm glad for you, little dude, didn't end up with that particular flavor of my sensitivity too)

anyway!

s11e11 mildred / e.t. (1982) dee wallace as mary

MILDRED I knew it. I knew it! I -- you two are too cute to be FBI agents.

i mean...

i was a little nervous what they were gonna do with marlene/eileen, having a deaf actress and character be a hunter is cool. assuming she doesn't die :S also she could teach them whatever fancy sigil situation she used to trap sam. ooh and a men of letters legacy, too. please don't kill her.

DEAN I tried to kill her. LUCIFER/CAS Well, the two of you are connected somehow by the Mark. DEAN Yeah, no, it's, uh... It's more than that. LUCIFER/CAS Attraction? Oh, Dean. DEAN I know. I know. Okay? Whatever it is... attraction, connection... I got to tell you, man, it scares me. I don't know that I can stop it. I don't know that I can resist it.

christ on a cracker. i hate everything about this. i got some time off from being enraged over him IMMEDIATELY lying to sam after all this we gotta be straight with each other yet again, but hey it's back. and now divulging to lucifer inadvertently, so much hate it.

[Mildred signs to Eileen ‘I got dibs on the other guy. You can have the tall one’] [Mildred giggles as she signs ‘I’m not much of a mountain climber anymore’ and laughs] [Eileen signs [‘Are you sure you don’t want both?’]

that was so cute and funny. thirsting over the boys in plain sight, and eileen like girl, shoot your shot, try for both of them! mildred is gorgeous, i think dean might be down

SAM Are you worried about her? So does this mean she has a shot? DEAN Well, I always did have a thing for Blanche on “Golden Girls” SAM Seriously? DEAN Hey, don't judge what you don't understand, Sammy. SAM No, I'm -- I'm not judging. I-I just always had a thing for Sophia. DEAN Yeah, I could see that.

sophia, huh. i mean, okay. can you imagine though, 6'4" sam and 4'10" estelle getty. talk about mountain climbing. and of course dean liked blanche, no brainer. and rue mclanahan was all of 51 when the show started

well, he went all-in on the crazy smile (sorry, pellegrino would never 😔)

EILEEN My mother was a lawyer. Be nice to follow in her footsteps. SAM I was studying law at Stanford when my brother came and got me so we could get our revenge. EILEEN You've been hunting together ever since? SAM Yeah. I-I wouldn't do this without my brother. He's had my back every step of the way. Even when I let him down.

oh, sammy 💔 show's convinced you that you fucked up more than i think you have (pushing the purgatory thing and i'm still not convinced :p) meanwhile we get to highlight how dean's fucking up right this moment.

well damn. they've done a great job establishing some little side characters i actually care about. thinkin if something happens to eileen or mildred 🔪🔪🔪

MILDRED You know, tell me something. When's the last time you watched a sunset without waiting for something to go bump in the night?

they (supposedly) would park and look at the stars sometimes, maybe they should add sunsets to the list

MILDRED You want to know the secret to living a long and happy life? DEAN Actually, yes, I do. MILDRED Follow your heart. You do that, all the rest just figures itself out.

and since i like her character and how she's playing her, this little sappy advice made me cry. also, i love how she's openly flirting with dean and he's flustered but not in the ew gross old lady is hitting on me way

great, and dean's the vulnerable one? i mean honestly, they're both emotionally vulnerable disasters all the time so.

MILDRED Darlin'... if there's one thing I've learned in all my years on the road, it's when somebody's pining for somebody else. Oh, don't try and hide it now. Follow your heart. Remember?

i mean. is he pining for amara? is that what we're going with? this obviously has the ambiguity that you could slap it on to whatever ship of choice as well. follow your heart to sam instead of your dick to amara? :p this nebulous connection to her is... nebulous. halfway tempted to just fucking look up how this plays out, but then i'm just waiting for things to happen (which is why i don't do well with big spoilers) so i probably won't. it has to be dire to do that (and i have with this show in the past, just to know how many episodes of whatever plotline were in my future)

DEAN He was looking for lore on the Darkness. Something a little off about him, too. SAM Something always seems a little bit off about Cas. Yeah, you know, being so close to Lucifer probably wasn't easy for him, either.

i'd say some of that's on the inconsistent writing/characterization of cas, but potayto potahto :p brushing off dean's concern to aid in finding out about lucifer at the worst time, i can imagine

SAM Dean... when I was with Lucifer, he, um... He showed me things. It was like a highlight reel of my biggest failures. DEAN Yeah, he was messing with you. That's what he does. SAM Give me a sec. I should've looked for you. When you were in Purgatory, I... I should've turned over every stone. But I didn't. I stopped. And I've never forgiven myself for it. DEAN Well... I have. Hey. That's in the past, man. What's done is done. All that matters now, all that's ever mattered, is that we're together.

oh 😭

oh god and sam's box with actual baby dean and sam in addition to the retirement home brochure?? now i'm really crying. good god. i knew about the brochure, but not the picture as actual kids

at least dean got into sleep clothes and under the covers this time.

go talk to sam, you stubborn ass.

[the-chosen-none]

Harold’s Accidentally Horrifying Vault

Okay, so I’ve made a post here before several months ago alluding to what I picked up on about Vault 29, which is where Harold came from, and I also made a post about it on the classic Fallout subreddit a while back, but I’ve decided do a deep-dive into it here because it is a perfect example of how different writers presumably not communicating with each other plus writers treating something obviously bad as not being that big of a deal accidentally created something way worse than what they might have originally intended. 

True, most of it comes from Van Buren and the Fallout Bible, the former becoming very different for New Vegas and the latter being more of a suggestion that writers can use or discard, but a reference to what became of Vault 29 in New Vegas seems to me like it was meant to be an Easter egg for the fans who knew about Van Buren to tell them that this idea created for Van Buren still exists in canon one way or the other. 

So basically, Vault 29′s experiment was to put a bunch of kids between 5-16 without their parents to be raised by machines and see what would happen. Depending on if you look at the Fallout Bible or VB, the parents were either originally with the kids but they were elderly and died off soon afterwards, or the kids were separated from the parents immediately. I’m going with the latter, since the former is pretty stupid. I’m skipping a lot of other story stuff surrounding 29 like the whole Derek Greenway part, but this is the gist. 

Then, a terminally ill woman who had her brain uploaded into a computer system named Diana Stone learned about the experiment and was horrified, so she took it upon herself to take over the Vault’s computers and raise the children herself.

However, rather than doing this purely out of kindness, Diana decided to play god and raise the children to believe that she was a divine being. When they left the Vault, Diana set up a village for her flock to live in, and much like Arroyo, the so-called “Twin Mothers tribe” would pretty much cosplay as Native Americans, in this case the Anasazi, to live in an agrarian society away from the rest of the world. 

My memory is a little fuzzy on what was supposed to happen in VB, so correct me if I’m wrong, but because your player character was a carrier of a plague, they had to find a way to cure it, and so by helping Diana re-establish herself as the ruler of the Twin Mothers, she would help you out, and the cure had to do with the fruits growing from the tree on Harold’s head. 

As far as I know, Diana was supposed to be seen as a good person, or at least helping her continue to keep the Twin Mothers in isolation is supposed to be the “correct” decision, even though she started a cultural-appropriating cult which she made herself the spiritual leader of, keeping her people ignorant of the outside world. It really IS Arroyo all over again, except at least Arroyo eventually abandoned their former way of life. 

Okay, so most of this has yet to be acknowledged in canon... however, Ulysses does mention the Twin Mothers in NV, and that they were either absorbed or destroyed outright by Caesar’s Legion. Like I said, I think this was meant to be an acknowledgement to the fans who had followed Van Buren’s development, so we can assume that the general outline of the Twin Mothers’ origins could be canon. 

Before I move on, I should acknowledge that Vault 29 did get a reference in Fallout 76, where a university student bemoans the thought of having to work with supposedly spoiled teenagers from affluent families, though because this character was not actually working with the Vault when she talked about it, we can assume that she’s not entirely correct in her assessment of the Vault, since the Fallout Bible pretty clearly stated that it was both young children and teenagers in there.

Anyway, so Harold came from a cult? That’s not great, but maybe it doesn’t sound quite horrifying to some of you yet. Oh, I haven’t even gotten to the worst part!

You see, the final piece of canon information about Vault 29 comes from the Tell-Me-About function from FO1 where, if you ask Harold about his Vault, he says that the people had to leave because there was too many people and not enough food and water to go around. If we consider the FO Bible, it says that Harold, and presumably the rest of the residents, left in 2090, 13 years after the War. 

A Vault originally made entirely of minors had to leave in just 13 years because of overpopulation, and remember, due to the nature of the Vault’s experiment, these children would have had to be selected before the War, and it wasn’t a case of random people from all over running inside... 

At best, Diana ignored what was going on and let the kids run wild because she wanted them to be free-spirited and one with nature and all that, OR she deliberately manufactured this overpopulation either to make as many people as possible for her cult or as a controlling method, real cults have been known to set up marriages and make the victims have children to discourage them to leave. 

It’s honestly pretty likely that the writers of Van Buren either forgot or had no knowledge of the Tell-Me-About line, and if they had included the Twin Mothers more in New Vegas, it’s likely that they would have ignored it, but because they have not yet talked about them in more detail within canon, what we’re left with is pieces that have accidentally created something both more disgusting yet interesting than the racist-sounding original idea for Van Buren.

Poor Harold. It’s amazing he turned out as kind and somewhat well-adjusted as he did.

[merklins]

Mad Science Team headcanons

-Doc's goggles are not only for hiding their expressions better, but to tone down the mantis shrimp vision they got from the slip in the goo! Without them he's more easily overwhelmed, unable to focus, and he can even end up with some terrible headaches. Their team has a routine locked and loaded to help if her senses ever get to be too much

-Polite Benrey regularly wears a set of glowing cat ear headphones that can change colors. In a crunch they can [] his need for glowsticks, but he mostly uses them to convey his pronouns to his friends!

-Sunkist was the first project Doc ever worked on with Tommy! She was still in early development when he joined the Restricted Research Department, so Tommy was excited to have someone that was interested in helping. Harold or Bubby would have done it if he asked, but Doc's passion and curiosity were UNMATCHED!

-Bubby loves puzzles. Not the ones that make pictures, those are Harold's preference. Bubby enjoys the mind numbing, overly complicated puzzles. One of the first he introduced Doc to during his recovery from the goo was a 7 by 7 Rubiks cube. He convinced Harold that it was for some kind of test of character, but he was ECSTATIC when Doc's eyes lit up at the sight of it! The two of them spent the next hour engulfed in the puzzle as Doc excitedly worked away at it and Bubby watched with a HUGE grin. They're puzzle buddies now. Harold is going to [] someone if he finds one more communal drawer, door, or box sealed with an impossible lock.

-Sunkist was inspired by big, fluffy, double coated dogs, and his undercoat subtly reflects with the same colors as his sweet voice! Everyone loves the idea until spring comes around and two of their electrically charged scientists are covered in rainbow fur.

-Doc got Joshua after the "Resonance Cascade" killed his science team. The Resonance Cascade was entirely their fault, and the aliens would have appeared anyways, but it was G-Man's fault that the team died during it. She was so unbearably lonely during her attempts to bring her family back that she took in the headcrab as a companion. They've seen enough horror flicks with mad scientists to know that loneliness is where it all goes wrong, so now they have a friend! A friend who would rather eat his brains, but a friend nonetheless. When his team is finally revived they are surprised for sure, but they took a liking to Joshua after a while! Bubby will always be the parent who didn't want the pet but loves it regardless. Much to the [] of the team, Benrey walks around the lab with Joshua resting on his head. Joshua is a very good headcrab.

-Even though he keeps his Black Mesa uniform, Benrey pops the little collar he has to match his team. Since the very moment he did that someone has been VERY passionate about making him a new outfit to help him stand out from the other security guards.

-Originally Doc had a normal ground-level room in the lab like everyone else, but after perfecting his metal arm attachments he insisted on making himself a loft space instead. The lab doesn't have a loft, or so Harold thought until he saw Doc climbing into a gap in the ceiling like a spider. Within the metal beams, pipes, and other structural supports, Doc actually found themself a large hidden space! It does have a clear entrance, but it's a bitch to get to without the gadget she wears. Harold let her keep the loft space because of how incredibly comfortable she was able to make it, but the room in the lab is still Doc's so that they have an easily accessible place to sleep too.

-Harold and Spork would get along great. I don't have a clever elaboration for this one, but I know it's true.

-Polite Benrey inexplicably has sweet voice. He was the reason they even knew it existed and gave it to Sunkist, but they still have no idea why he can do that. Benrey doesn't have an explanation for it either , but he also doesn't care to find out more, so they all accept it as a Benrey thing and don't hassle him about it. The whole team has started calling it "Black Mesa sweet voice", so that anyone who catches wind of it will assume it's a typical Black Mesa project and leave him alone.

So many more thoughts too, but this post is getting long and I have places to be, so. Ten for now!

[lixendynx]

I’m actually very interested in your monster au, so if you don’t mind, could you explain some of the lore behind it? And what is everyone anyways? Thanks :)

This is crazy long, so sorry so under the read more it goes, but first…

Thanks for taking an interest (:

HEhe I get to talk about my silly little brain project

First off, I want to say that as of right now the goal is to find a species and place for each member of the Gen 1 Cast with campers from ROTI and RR serving as background characters (sorry if you like PI or TD23, I haven’t seen either) I still have some that still don’t have a place so if anyone has any ideas, lemme know.

Anyway, the main ‘plot’ is a war between the elemental courts, of course sparked by Heather and Alejandro.

The Burromeurtos were a very prestigious and well known family of monster hunters, and yet Alejandro was never as good as his family wanted him to be. And the pressure got to him, leading him to leave his family behind in order to pursue The Ice Queen, Heather. Her court consisting of the Ice Dancers, and two fairies she had taken from the Earth court, Lindsay and Beth. Alejandro manages to convince Lindsay and Beth to help him take Heather to a big, magic volcano. She fights out and manages to escape, but Alejandro ends up plunging into the lava, become reborn as the Fire Elemental/Phoenix hybrid. Ezekiel fishes him out and Alejandro manipulates him as well as Lindsay and Beth to join his side, declaring war on the Ice Kingdom.

Meanwhile, on an island completely run by werewolves, there are also satyrs there, I guess. Cody, who had previously failed in a hunt and mauled by a bear wants to make it up to his herd by fighting the werewolves to expand their hunting grounds. DJ doesn’t want him to. But one of the werewolves, Geoff has met a mermaid, and fallen in love.

There’s more, like the Air Kingdom, graveyard, and Vampire Coven, and I’m sure more will come, but in terms of story, that’s what I have.

GEN 1

Alejandro - Phoenix/Fire Elemental, Formally Human

Beth - Pixie

Bridgette - Mermaid

Cody - Satyr

Courtney - TBD, elf maybe?

DJ - Satyr

Duncan - Lich

Eva - Ghoul

Ezekiel - Goblin

Geoff - Werewolf

Gwen - Vampire

Harold - TBD

Heather - Ice Elemental

Izzy - Mummy/Zombie

Justin - Siren (Aquatic)

Katie - TBD

Leshawna - TBD

Lindsay - Pixie

Noah - Ghost

Owen - Frankenstein’s Monster

Sadie - TBD

Sierra - Human, cryptid enthusiast

Trent - Siren (Aerial)

Tyler - Winged Person (?)

ROTI

Dawn - Earth Elemental

Scott - Shark Mermaid

Mike - Shapeshifter??

Dakota - Dakotazoid

Lightning - TBD; Something Aerial I think

RR

Sisters - Emma is a ghost and Kitty is some sort of zombie maybe (?)

Rockers and Step Brothers - Werewolves

Goths - Vampires

Ice Dancers - Some sort of ice sprite??

Okay not as long as I thought, but still.

Odds are I forgot something, but I am always open to thoughts, questions, and suggestions. Once more, thanks for taking an interest in my silly little AU (:

[lizyarikus]

Childhood Harry Potter fan talking about learning about all the ways HP has been questionable (not "badly written", questionable ethically). Random thoughts. Fever posting.

Not being an English speaker (and a child. I wouldn't learn English well enough for nearly a decade after I first read the books), reading in translations, really made the poor [insert here] representation miss completely.

I didnt know there was an ethnic diversity painted in caricatures. Because could not tell apart a normal English name from a whimsy fairytale name from an ethnic or pseudo-ethnic name.

I'm Jewish, I didnt know the one kid with an Ashkenazi last name was Jewish, because to me it was "yup he has -man in his name that's an English word checks out".

I just assumed most names were Fantasy Keysmash and some were English Puns. Look, there's a ' in that surname, real names don't do that, how magical, also what's an Ireland? (To be fair, i probably knew Ireland exists, but not anything about the language or surnames, because I was like nine and the world was big).

Here's a nonsensical magical-sounding alliterative name that one of the translations memorably, and universally hated, made into Evilly Evil, here's another nonsensical magical-sounding alliterative name - oh she's Asian? I thought they were just doing whatever appearance casting for background characters in the movie version because all kids wanted to play in Harry Potter and they picked most of them by the vibes, except for the ones who really have to be ginger. I never cared about the movies much anyway. She was Asian in the original books too? I was supposed to be able to tell by the name?

In the first chapter of the first book it's explicitly stated that the uncle hears "Harry Potter" on the street and is surprised. Maybe it was Harvey or Harold? he asks himself, knowing it's not. I read that and my brain went "Harry is a weird magical name that's why he knows it can't be a coincidence. No one in the normal world is called Harry". Imagine my shock when I saw a real person called that on the news - in the English monarchy. I believe the moment I realized "Potter" is English for Goncharov was when I, years later, downloaded a mobile game called "Let's Create! Pottery" where you swipe to make vases the right shape.

I remember reading the name Draco for the first time and thinking "how funny, the author made up a random name and it accidentally sounds like Dragon without the last letter to me", because I didn't know that word root is in many languages and that was on purpose. He did mention it in the text somewhere later, so I was disillusioned of that one quickly.

And, of course, some people criticized the books. Especially my dad. They're stupid children's books and everything I like is invalid automatically because he has Pure Perfect Interests and I am into Dumb Shit For Babies. Even if we like the same stuff, my way of liking it is the incorrect one and he likes it for the right reasons by the way I'm reading JKR's new detective book it's good because it's not babies fiction. But, along probably legit writing questions which for obvious reasons didn't stick with me for a decade, most criticisms were about things that were like that Conceptually, e. g. "why are the first books for kids and the last ones aren't?" (that's the point, the protagonist grows up and the reader grows up with him and the problems he encounters get less and less fairytale hero's journey and more and more real life adult problems like fascism), or Just British Things, e. g. "stupid school what's the point of sorting them if they have all the same classes" (because that's what fancy British boarding schools do, mostly to promote good grades by making learning competitive and to sort them in sports teams. Both of which happen in the book), or "why are they using s train" (English people as a culture love trains. Something something industrial revolution and the greatness of Victorian British Empire.)

We (aka, fandom I belonged to a few years later, I don't remember what I thought from the first reading) knew that slavery is there, we treated it as a plot hole - she didn't think too hard about the implications when she wrote them into her silly children's book and then she's suddenly writing a book for older teens and there's a slave species there. Hence the common fanon of "magical energy leeches that signed a contract to provide service in return for consumed magic instead of stealing it". I will not claim to know how much they are actually influenced by overt or subconscious racism.

Finally, "guy always explodes stuff" is a visual gag from the movies. He exploded something once in the book and they made it a reoccurring joke. You can still have questions towards everyone responsible for the movies (which includes JKR), but, strictly speaking, is not a source material thing.

That's all I've got, please don't get sick, kids, or you'll be writing on Tumblr about Harry Potter at 5 am because you feel too bad to sleep.

[semiconducting]

i love watching total drama with my partner because it's something i hyperfixated on for SO LONG as a kid that i have soooo many old opinions and fandom lore swimming in my brain that i can bitch to him about. anyways today he said the most autistic character (behind harold, we agreed) is lindsay and that was so big brained

[haomnyangz]

gab’s neverending 2022 shadowhunters renaissance gifs: harry shum jr big brain malec scene improv 

[fightwing]

plots please :D

simply for the fact of fucking with batman: 

1. hal and dick meet nightlantern ivjfrvnnfkn. like obviously it’d have to be interdimensional shenanigans but i feel like those two would be like what do u mean there’s a world where we’re essentially one person? alternatively they have to work with / save night lantern / that world just for a little smattering of a plot but just the spiderman pointing at each other meme of it all... exquisite. nd yeah bruce would be like maybe.... not all worlds...... are worth saving........

2. one of my absolute FAVORITE dynamics is the trio of uncles barry, ollie and hal create for wally and roy and i know dick was never really apart of that bc he’s b’s kid but it’s our canon and we control the au so basically all the fun uncle hal stuff. imagine if ollie barry AND bruce were all gone during lil baby titan years and hal essentially has to take over like ‘hello fellow youths’. (or honestly anything robin verse dick because he may be robin but what kid doesnt think gl’s are the fucking coolest)

3. SOME KIND of lantern au like i know dick was on that potentials list for a GL ring but u put the idea of blue lantern in my greedy lil mind or dicks star sapphire (god bless carol <3) thing. either main verse/nightwing era or like non-bruce verse where after haly’s circus we make a ring verse instead of what usually unfolds but even without rings just mentor hal in general bc i think not only would they b a good team but they’d be good for each other, like trust and faith n all that good stuff 

4. harold and richard au

[jaceyneedsabetterusername]

Hayloft p.4

Pairing: Arvin Russell x F!Reader

Summary: Your dad brings home his new coworker, Arvin Russell, telling you that he’ll be living with the two of you for a while. While attempting to keep Arvin from seeing the disfunction of your relationship with your father, the two of you grow closer than you thought. (Inspired by “Hayloft” by Mother Mother, though that’ll really only be one chapter later on so I don’t know if it really counts…)

Warnings: Mentions of suicide, death, abuse, and sexual assault (depictions of none, though), alcoholism/ drunkenness, mentions of teen pregnancy, mentions of infidelity, murder

Word Count: 6.4k

A/N: Pretty lightly edited, just a warning

Read the Previous Chapters!

Part 1  Part 2 Part 3

“Hey, hun, what can I getcha?” You leaned into your popped hip, pen and notepad in hand.

A man you hadn’t met before, clearly someone just passing through town, was sitting across the diner bar in a light blue button-up and suspenders. He was fairly clean cut save for the day-old scruff across his face. He studied the menu intensely before setting it down and looking up at you with a sweet-as-pie smile. “Can I please have coffee with some cream and the grits?” He asked with a southern drawl.

You scribbled down his order on the notepad, “That all?”

“Mhm, I think so. Thanks doll.” He slid the menu towards you before reaching for a newspaper that had been left on the counter beside him by the last patron. You turned around to pin the man’s order on the little turnstile for the chef when the little bell on the door rang.

Tucking your notepad back into the apron tied around your waist, you grabbed the pot of coffee from the counter and poured the man a cup of the rich black liquid. Next, you prepared a little ceramic cup of cream and walked back to set them on the counter in front of him. His polite thanks were only the background when you saw Arvin walk behind the man and shoot you a smile before settling down in a seat at the bar only a few seats away.

You walked over to him and leaned on the counter with a smile, “Well, hey there stranger. You on lunch already?”

Arvin nodded, looking to you hopefully, “Yeah ‘n I was hopin’ you might be too so I could grab a bite to eat with my favorite girl.”

“Shh!” You hushed him with exasperated wide eyes, like it should have been obvious that he needed to keep his voice down, because in your mind it was. You nodded your head to the other patrons in the diner. “Y’know word travels fast in little towns like this ‘n I don’t need my daddy findin’ out ‘bout us,” you whispered to Arvin who sighed in annoyed understanding. You knew he wasn’t annoyed at you but the situation was less than ideal.

He tapped his fingers on the counter and his knees bounced under the bar, “So is that a no for lunch?”

You glanced over your shoulder to look at the clock that hung on the wall. It was only eleven in the morning but maybe you could ask Charlene if she could cover so you could take an early lunch. “Let me double check real quick.” You held up a finger to excuse yourself into the back to find your coworker.

No more than ten minutes later, you and Arvin walked out to his car with two take-out boxes of burgers you had managed to swipe from the kitchen in hand. He slid into the driver’s seat while you planted yourself beside him in the passenger’s. You handed him one of the boxes of food before opening your own and

digging into the small handful of fries. “So how is your day going so far?”

Arvin took a large bite of his burger, covering his mouth with his hand has he tried to speak and chew at the same time, “Ain’t too bad. I got an engine to rebuild for an old Ford when I get back but nothin’ too terrible. How ‘bout you?”

“Ready to go home already,” you chuckled, popping a fry in your mouth, “But it ain’t too bad here either. Just would like to not be here.”

Arvin laughed a little beside you, “I know how that feels. Thanks for the burgers by the way. I appreciate it. I don’t want you gettin’ in no trouble for stealin’ food.”

You shrugged off his concern, “Don’t worry ‘bout it. If people don’t eat it, it just goes in the trash anyways. I ain’t gonna get in any trouble.”

He let out a heavy breath, resigning to your insistence, which he really just found an adorable confident stubbornness. A comfortable silence fell over the unmoving car as the two of you ate your lunches in the parking lot. When you finished chewing your bite, you looked over at Arvin, “How long you been livin’ with us?”

Arvin looked up at the brick wall straight ahead in thought, “Maybe five months now. Longer than I meant to-"

"I didn't mean it like that! I was just wonderin'...." you got awkwardly quiet for a moment, "Havin' you 'round has been the best five months in a really really long time."

"For me too. When I came into town, I thought I'd be livin' in my car. Didn't know how lucky I'd be gettin' to live with the most beautiful girl in the world." His hand reached over to your thigh, squeezing lightly.

Even after all of his sweet affections and compliments, they never failed to make your cheeks ache from trying not to blush and smile like a schoolgirl. “You really think flattery will get you somewhere?” you giggled teasingly, turning towards him and nudging his leg with your hand.

“Well it got me in your house so…” He teased back, something that he had been doing more often in the last few weeks. Arvin had never been the most humorous of people, aside from the occasional chuckle or hidden smile. That had been changing since the two of you had gotten closer though.

“Uh, no! It might get you kicked outta my house though if my daddy ever finds out.” It started as chuckle but the words faded into concerned worry as you realized how true they could really be.

Arvin sensed the shift, “You really think your daddy would kick me out if he found out ‘bout us?”

You nodded, “Without a doubt. Would probably throw me out too.” You shifted so you were sitting on your bent leg, suddenly uncomfortable.

He began cautiously, “I mean… would that really be such a bad thing?”

You whipped your head to look at him, “I ain’t got nowhere else to live right now. I been savin’ up for a year to move out but it ain’t enough to buy a place of my own yet.”

“How much you got?”

That number was in your head immediately, one that you kept a running total of with every paycheck. “$4,317.” It wasn’t enough, though, and you knew it. Even the old run down houses around town cost $12,000, which meant you weren’t even halfway to the fixer-uppers, not that you minded buying a fixer upper. “I don’t need a mansion or nothin’ but it ain’t nearly enough for even something small.”

Arvin chewed his lip, thinking about the box of cash he’d been stashing away with each of his paychecks as well. He knew exactly what it was like in your position, struggling to save up the money to get on your own feet. He hated relying on others and, even though he really liked you, he hated depending on your and your father for shelter. “You ain’t gonna be stuck in this ol’ town forever,” he promised you and it came out just like that. A promise. “You’re too good for this place.”

Another smile forced its way onto your face at his words of hope, “I’ll get outta here eventually…”

Suddenly, a familiar male voice yelled your name and you flinched. You turned towards the voice to see your boss, Harold, standing at the backdoor of the diner with his hands on his hips. He gave you a stern look and tapped the watch on his wrist before pointing at you then jabbing his thumb over his shoulder towards the door.

“Shit! I totally lost track of time!” You scrambled to gather up the trash from lunch and stuffed it into the paper bag you’d brought it out in. “I’m sorry, I have to run!”

Arvin had nearly jumped out of his skin when your name had been yelled, the only person he’d ever heard calling you that way being your father. He crumbled up the paper wrapper for his burger and stuffed it in the paper bag for you. “‘M sorry. Didn’t mean to get you in trouble with your boss.”

“Nah, he’s fine,” you waved off the worry dismissively, “He acts all tough but he ain’t nothin’ but a softy.” You opened up the door and began to slide out when you stopped and took a quick glance around. Nobody was in the parking lot, or really anywhere in sight for that matter. In an impulsive swift action, you grabbed Arvin by the collar of his greasy shirt and pulled his lips to yours quickly before pushing him before anyone could see.

He looked stunned, big brown eyes wide and shocked by your courageous kiss. Your heart raced and your cheeks flushed with the exhilaration of actually sneaking a kiss to Arvin in public. It was a dangerous move but your dad was at work and there was nobody else around to see. You tried to hide your excited smile by chewing your bottom lip but it didn’t work. “Thanks for lunch, Arv.”

“Uh - y-yeah. Thank you for the burger.” Arvin stumbled over his words while you slid out of the car and closed the door behind you, leaving the poor boy struggling to make his brain catch up to reality.

“See you at home!” You waved one last time before turning. Arvin watched as you jogged back to the entrance of the diner, your little dress bouncing with every movement. You turned to give him one last glance before you disappeared behind the door.

Work had passed rather uneventfully for you. You put in the last few hours of your shift, went to the grocery store, and then headed home to start on dinner.

Arvin, on the other hand, the rest of his day at work had shaken the good feeling he’d had since his lunch break with you. He had found himself with a wrench in hand, trying to bolt back in the engine he’d been rebuilding for the last few hours. Grease smeared across his shirt, pants, and face despite how hard he tried to keep his dirty hands from ruining his clothes. Even if they were work clothes, he didn’t have that many sets of outfits nor the money to go out and buy more.

“My cousin lives o’er there with his wife. Said the sheriff up and disappeared for a while but they found him dead in the woods.”

Arvin’s head nearly hit the hood of the car that was propped up when he heard those words. He looked over his shoulder to see Davis and Fred, two of the other guys that worked at the mechanics shop, talking over two cans of beer.

“You hear anythin’ ‘bout that, Arvin?” Davis asked, sipping his can.

Arvin’s heart twisted in panic but he shook his head like hadn’t heard what they were talking about, “Hear ‘bout what?”

“Few months back, the sheriff in my cousin’s hometown turned up dead. Someone shot ‘im in the woods outside o’ some small town nearby. His name was like Lodeck or Bodecker or somethin’ like that.” Davis explained the story to both of the guys.

“Eh, pro’lly had it comin’,” Your dad came entered from the storage room with a handful of bolts, “I know I’ve met some sheriffs that deserved a bullet between the eyes.”

Fred rolled his eyes, “Yeah well you’re an angry drunk so I’m sure you’d say that ‘bout anyone who took a drink from you. I’m sure this guy wasn’t that bad. What kinda sick fuck you gotta be to shoot a sheriff? This ain’t no wild west movie where you go gunnin’ down the law.”

“Nah, I heard he was a no good son o’ a bitch. Guess his sister and her husband got murdered the day before. Found tons of pictures o’ them kissin’ on some dead guys. Some real sick shit, Fred. Sheriff might have been in on it too. Regardless, my cousin said he ran into ‘im one time with his wife and the sheriff really was a bastard,'' Davis shrugged off Fred’s comment, refuting the tragedy Fred was trying to make Bodecker’s death by tarnishing his name.

Arvin’s heart was racing and he began to feel dizzy. The images of those few days had haunted him since they had happened but he had found himself thinking about it less and less as the days passed.

“Arvin?”

Arvin shook his head out of the clouds and snapped back into reality, “What?”

“You came into town ‘round the same time all this happened. Did you hear anythin’ about it?” Fred questioned, wiping his greasy hands on his jeans.

The young man just shook his head, “Nah, I ain’t heard nothin’ ‘bout it till now. I heard ‘bout the sister though. Sounds like she and her boyfriend were no good.”

“You know what I think?” Your dad began, picking up a wrench and pointing it in Arvin’s direction, “I think our man Arvin here did the sheriff in!”

Arvin stiffened up, “What? Why would you think that?”

“You come strollin’ along through town with nothin’ but a backpack and no backstory ‘bout the same time four people turn up murdered. Mighty suspicious.” Arvin tried his hardest to stand tall and not allow his fear to show but the tension in his jaw was bordering of painful now.

Davis swatted at your dad, “C’mon, leave the boy alone. There’s gotta be thousands of people in that area that coulda murdered them. Can’t imagine Arvin doin’ such a thing.”

Arvin was grateful for Davis’s trust. If only he deserved it.

“I’m only jokin’! Y’all a bunch of whiny little girls, can’t take a fuckin’ joke.” Your dad grumbled to himself, swatting his hand towards his coworkers.

“Ah, shut up.” Fred stood up from the table he’d been sitting at and laid back down on the dolley before sliding under the jacked up Chevy he had been tasked with. “Ain’t nobody ‘round here takes you seriously.”

Arvin watched as your dad walked past Fred, kicking him in the leg and earning a loud exclamation of annoyance, but it was as if he were disconnected from the whole scene. He had tried so hard to forget what had happened back in Knockemstiff and Coal Creek, though it seemed damn near impossible considering it had uprooted his entire life. This tiny town a few hours away was his safe haven, his new beginning. He never would have imagined that anyone this far away would have heard about the murders.

Hearing Davis and Fred bring up Bodecker’s name made Arvin’s blood turn to ice in his veins. What kinda sick fuck you gotta be to shoot a sheriff? Fred’s words played over and over in Arvin’s head. This was just what he was worried about. This was why he ran. Nobody would believe Bodecker was trying to kill him first. Self defense didn’t mean shit when it was against the law. The same with Reverend Teagarden. A man of the word? Arvin didn’t stand a chance if anyone found out what he’d done.

“Hey son,” Davis’s soft voice made Arvin nearly jump out of his skin, “Don’t take nothin’ that ol’ man says to heart. I’m sure you know since you been livin’ with him that he’s just a cranky ol’ drunk who don’t know when to shut up. You’re a good kid, Arvin. Ain’t none of us actually think you did it.”

Arvin looked down at where Davis’s hand rested on his shoulder, the same way his dad used to touch his shoulder when he was reassuring him. He forced a small appreciative nod and a strained appearance of being unbothered, “It’s alright, Davis. I know he’s just kiddin’ ‘round. I ‘ppreciate it though.”

_

Your father arrived at home before Arvin, much to your dismay. Elvis Presley’s Blue Hawaii album was spinning on the record player when he came into the kitchen, kicking his boots off by the door.

“Hey, daddy! How was work?” You asked, mashing a bowl of potatoes for dinner.

He made a line directly to the fridge, grabbing a beer and popping the tab off with no effort, “It was alright. Damn Gilligan blew out the transmission on his truck so I been stuck fixin’ that up all day. Lookin’ forward to this right here.” Your father lifted up the beer bottle and sipped it with satisfaction. Yeah, I’m sure you were, you thought, rolling your eyes with your back turned to your dad.

“Well, if you wanna get cleaned up, dinner should be ready in about twenty minutes. More than enough time for a shower,” you offered with a cheerful voice. Lunch with Arvin today had made your day good in a way that was hard to ruin.

“Yeah, I might go do that. What’s for dinner?” Your father walked over and peeked over your shoulder to see what you had cooking on the stove.

“Mashed potatoes, green beans, and chicken.” You cut in a few slices of butter and added them to the bowl of mashed potatoes, sprinkling some salt, pepper, and garlic powder to taste.

Expecting some words of discouragement like you usually earned from your father, he just nodded contently and disappeared out of the kitchen towards the bathroom. You turned to watch him walk away, your mouth fallen open in pleased surprise at the fact that you just had a semi-pleasant interaction with your father for the first time in several weeks. You turned back to mixing in the now melted butter into the mashed potatoes when the front door opened yet again.

You looked back to see Arvin walking in through the living room, “Hey, Arv!”

His hands were shoved deep in his pockets and judging by the way his eyes shot up to you, as if he hadn’t expected your greeting, he had been staring at the ground when he walked in. “Hi,” he answered low and short with no emotion one way or the other.

Your brows furrowed, “Everythin’ alright?” Leaving the food on the counter and wiping your hands on your apron, you walked out into the living room towards him.

Arvin visibly took a step back and his eyes widened a little, his shoulders squaring up, “Yeah, ‘m good. Just wanna take a shower.”

Before you could get the words out, he had already begun walking away. “My dad’s already in the bathroom,” you called out after him, finally getting him to stop.

Arvin didn’t turn back to you though, only half glanced over his shoulder, “Oh, alright.” He turned back to continue his walk back to his room.

“Dinner will be ready soon!” You attempted to add, only earning a small thanks in response and the sound of Arvin’s door closing. “O-oh… okay.” You stood alone in the living room, the sound of running water coming from the bathroom and Elvis Presley’s voice filling the room but not loud enough to drown out your concern.

Dinner went by just as uncomfortably. You poked at your mashed potatoes, keeping your gaze stuck down at the food on your plate except for when you glanced over at Arvin who seemed to be actively looking anywhere except for you. This only made you roll your eyes out of frustration and stare back down at your food.

Your dad talked about his day, mostly grumbled complaints, “I don’t get nearly ‘nough respect ‘round here. Damn Fred and Davis callin’ me a drunk. What? A man can’t enjoy a damn beer without being called a drunk! Damn prudes.” When you didn’t respond, he reached over and tapped your arm, “Hey? You even listenin’?”

“Hm?” You tried to make yourself focus on what he was saying this time, “Sorry, long day. What happened?”

“See? I ain’t get no respect at work and I can’t even get no respect at my own damn house from my own damn daughter!” He grumbled, the feet of the wooden chair scraping against the ground as he stood up forcefully, swaying a little side to side but bracing himself on the wall to walk out of the room.

You didn’t even possess the mental capacity to care about his little tantrum. Your mind was swimming with confusion and, honestly, anger, at Arvin’s little unexplained silent treatment. “Okay, what’s wrong?” You asked, leaning towards Arvin.

“Nothin’.” He answered simply, taking a sip of his water. His voice was low and he still refused to make eye contact, despite nothin’ being wrong.

“That’s a lie. Everythin’ was fine this mornin’ and now you’re suddenly not talkin’ to me. Won’t even look at me! What the hell, Arvin? Did I say somethin’ wrong?” Thinking back, there wasn’t anything you had said earlier that you could imagine warranting such a negative response from Arvin so your confusion and concern had quickly turned to frustration.

Arvin shook his head, “No, no, you ain’t did nothin’ wrong.”

“Then what is it?” You practically begged him to tell you. You hated being upset at him when clearly something was bothering him but this felt like he was just playing some broody guessing game with you, something you got enough of from your dad.

Stress shone through Arvin’s eyes and he met your gaze finally, if only for a second, before looking away again. You could see there was a flicker of something you hadn’t seen in him before but you couldn’t quite put your finger on it. Whatever it was, it was really bothering him and you felt guilty for being upset. You just couldn’t understand why you suddenly were being ignored for something that apparently had nothing to do with you.

“I can’t tell you.”

Arvin’s admittal just made you more upset. “So you’re not mad at me but you’re ignoring me and can’t tell me why?”

Arvin hadn’t seen you look at him this way. At your father, yes, but he was unaccustomed to that raised eyebrow and frustratedly desperate crack in your voice being directed towards him. He hated it. He hated knowing that he was causing you to feel upset and helpless when he was supposed to be your escape from those exact feelings.

But he couldn’t bring himself to tell you the truth. You’d think he was a monster. You’d hate him. He’d lose the one good thing he had in his life because-

Arvin shook his head, “‘M sorry.” He looked anywhere but at you because he couldn’t stand to see the way your face fell, though he could practically feel your heart fall from across the table. He didn’t need to see it. He knew.

“Fine.” You stood up and grabbed your plate, scraping the rest in the garbage and setting the plate in the sink. Your appetite was gone and your patience had snapped, not that you had been the most patient thus far anyways.

Arvin watched as you stormed out of the kitchen, grabbed your coat off the coat rack by the front door, and walked out of the house. His head hit his hands. No matter how hard he tried to protect those he cared about, he only seemed to hurt them more.

-

You hadn’t expected Arvin to find you here so when the door opened to the old barn, you turned around in surprise. You were curled up in your coat, sitting on an old wooden crate that had been untouched in this unused barn for God knows how long. A large window looked out over the large field that had once been the family farm but was now practically a glorified dirt lot. Your coat was wrapped tightly around your body, held in place with one hand while you held a lit cigarette with the other.

“Didn’t know you smoked,” Arvin took a few steps in, his hands shoved guiltily in the pocket of his denim jacket.

You blew out a large plume of smoke that you had been holding in and looked away, “I don’t too often.”

Arvin closed the barn door behind him as he approached you and you had to fight the urge to get up and leave but you knew that made you no less immature than the way you felt he was acting.

“‘M sorry. I really am.”

You took another drag and turned to him, the moonlight illuminating his features - somehow so boy-like but so rugged - and it was hard to stay mad at him. “I am too. I don’t mean to be dramatic but I just… I don’t understand, Arv. If somethin’s wrong, you can tell me. This whole silent treatment BS with zero explanation doesn’t cut it.”

Arvin let out a heavy breath. While doing the dishes from dinner for you after you stormed off, he had had time to contemplate what to do. And he had decided. “If I tell you, it’s gonna change how you look at me.”

Your head tilted up at his cryptic opener but you said nothing, only urged him to continue with your eyes.

With a deep shaky inhale, he started his story, “I ain’t a bad man but I’ve done some bad things. Things that I thought I could run away from. I been livin’ a lie for a long time, actin’ like I ain’t hurt nobody, but it ain’t true.” Arvin paused for a moment to gauge your reaction and all he saw was fear in your eyes, just as he had feared.

A million thoughts of terrible things people were capable of ran through your head as you tried to figure out which one Arvin could possibly be guilty of, though they all felt so out of character for him. Was it murder? Assault? Rape? Thievery? The man you had come to care for so deeply now swam in a murky pool of doubt and distrust. Arvin saw all this and more in your deep, worried eyes.

“What did you do?” Your voice was weaker than you wanted it to be, cracking with fear. Until today, you hadn’t imagined Arvin capable of doing anything that could real harm to anyone, maybe aside from a stupid fight in high school or something along those lines, but you could see it in his eyes that whatever it was he was trying to confess to really was that bad.

Arvin lost his ability to speak for a moment. He had resolved to tell you everything before even coming out here to talk to you but the fear shining in your eyes already had his heart breaking. It was as if every new line of moonlight reflecting off the growing whites of your eyes was a new stain that he managed to tarnish your view of him with. Arvin had to look away because he couldn’t bear to look at you when he finally admitted his crimes, couldn’t stand to watch your face contort in fear when you realized what a monster he was.

“Y-you remember that preacher I told you ‘bout? The one that hurt my sister?”

You nodded, “Y-yeah…”

Arvin swallowed hard and he gripped his thigh tight enough to turn his knuckles white. “Well few weeks after we buried Lenora, a police officer came up ‘n told me the coroner had found out she was havin’ a baby. None of us knew before. I don’t know how but I just knew it was that no good preacher. I didn’t have any proof though so I started followin’ ‘im ‘n found out he was worse than I thought. He was no good to his wife ‘n I saw him out takin' advantage of another girl in town who was even younger than my Lenora was. He was doin’ nothin’ but hurtin’ people ‘n I… I killed im.”

Your mouth fell open, “You- You killed him?”

Arvin looked down at his feet, “I shot him.”

It was silent as you processed the information. This preacher sounded like a terrible man, abusing young girls and leading one to commit suicide. The infidelity to his wife was a moot point against his other indiscretions and even that was unacceptable. It honestly sounded like Arvin had done a service to the world, taking this monster out of it, but it was still difficult to look at him the same after knowing that he had actually shot someone.

When you didn’t respond, Arvin had decided to continue, not thinking he could cause much more damage, “I ran. Left a note for my grandma and uncle and disappeared. I tried hitchhiking my way out of town when I got picked by this couple. They seemed nice ‘nough at first but the husband, he started actin’ real weird. They pulled us way off the road. Said he wanted to take some pictures but then I saw him pull out a gun and then he tried pullin’ me outta the car. I-I panicked and I kicked the door into him ‘n I shot ‘im before he could get me.”

Arvin’s voice was cracking as tears began to fall down his face. It was one thing to replay the memories in his own head but it was another thing entirely to actually confess his sins to someone he cared so deeply about, knowing the truth would most likely hurt you. “The wife, she pulled out a gun and pointed it at me ‘n I pointed mine at her. I begged her to put the gun down. I-I didn’t wanna shoot her. I really didn’t. I was so tired of killin’ but then she apologized ‘n I knew she was gonna pull the trigger. We both shot at the same time. I got no clue how she didn’t shoot me. I fell out the car without a scratch but I when I got up, I realized I got her through the neck 'n she was gone. I panicked ‘n searched the car. Found all these pictures of her all naked and huggin’ up on some naked dead guy ‘n I knew… I knew I was gonna be next.”

Your brain sprinted a mile a minute to try and keep up with the trauma Arvin was confessing and you didn’t know whether to hug him and let him cry on you or run as far away as possible.

“Then-”

“There’s more?” You wanted to beg him to stop talking, to stop telling you about the blood on his hands, to stop telling you about all the suffering he had been through. You sounded shocked and heartbroken and yet none of these tragedies were yours.

Arvin hiccuped and sniffled in a failed attempt to hide a sob. Red had taken over his features, both physically and metaphorically. Obviously distraught by his past and now your reaction, he felt like he was beginning to spiral down that hole of darkness that he had tried so hard to claw his way out of. There were nothing but snakes down there, ready to bite him and poison his mind with the words he had fought so desperately to keep out. Murderer. Stalker. Liar. Sinner. All of these and so many more.

Yet, he nodded, feeling as if he’d still be lying if he didn’t finish telling you everything. When he nodded, you made a small squeak of disbelief.

“I-I ran,” He sniffled out, “I hitchhiked my way back to my old hometown. I didn’t know why at first but I just needed to go home. Felt like maybe I could fix what had been broken there. Went there to find it all burnt down but then this sheriff came lookin’ after me. Turns out he was that lady’s brother - the one who shot at me and had the pictures of the cut up dead guys. He was all angry and wanted to kill me for shootin’ his sister. I tried… I tried to tell ‘im that she was no good and that she was gonna kill me but he didn’t wanna listen. He was shootin’ at me and… and… I ain’t had no choice.”

It was silent, aside from the ambient bugs chirping outside. You had tried so hard to focus on Arvin’s face but you had long since zoned out visually, only able to focus on the words he was saying. How could he have gone through all of this? How could your wonderful, amazing, beautiful Arvin Russell have survived so much suffering and been forced to murder people? Murder.

“Please say somethin’.”

Your lips quivered as your vision came back into view and all you saw was a tearful, fearful, remorseful boy before you on the brink of falling apart. Arvin’s hair was messy from having run his hands through it, his eyes were red and puffy from the tears, his breathing was shaky from remembering. There were no words.

You threw your arms around his neck and held him tightly to you. You didn’t know what else to do. How does someone respond to information like this? There was so much trust that Arvin needed to put in you to tell you - you couldn’t freak out.

“You don’t hate me?” His hands flew to your arms, prying them off his neck so he could see your face.

Your head shook, “How could I hate you for what you did?”

“I murdered four people.”

“You took out a disgusting predator who practically killed your sister and was harming who knows how many other girls. Then you killed a couple of murderers who pulled guns on you first in self defense. And then, yet again, you were put in a life or death situation with a sheriff who was shootin’ at you for killin’ his murderin’ sister. Three of those were self defense and I’d dare say that first one was a public service. You have nothin’ to be sorry for. You have nothin’ to regret. You did what you had to do to survive.” You squeezed Arvin’s hands tightly, running your soft thumbs over the lightly calloused skin of his knuckles.

Arvin looked down at your hands on his, hands that were so much smaller than his own but right now felt so encompassing and comforting, as if they wrapped his own in a blanket of protection. He couldn’t believe you were okay with this. He was barely okay with it. “I don’t regret it but I didn’t wanna have to do it. If I coulda let that lady go, if she only woulda listened to me ‘n put the gun down I wouldn’t o’ had to pull the trigger. I coulda let the cops deal with it. Same with the sheriff. If only he woulda listened… I only wanted to shoot the preacher. I was okay with havin’ that on my conscience. But I had no idea how outta control that day was gonna get. All those cold dead eyes starin’ up at you, watchin’ the life drain from someone’s face ‘n knowin’ you’re the one who caused that... Even if they were real fucked up people, it ain’t a sight that’s easy to see.”

“I can’t even imagine what it must’ve been like, Arvin.” Your hand slid up his arm to rest on his bicep and you leaned your forehead onto his shoulder. His arm snaked around your body and held you close but cautious, like he was scared if he held you too tightly that you’d be scared he’d hurt you too. Of course, you weren’t. The thought did cross your mind that perhaps it was unwise to trust a man who just admitted to killing four people but that wasn’t Arvin and you knew it. “You may have killed people but that does not make you a killer. You’re just someone who was put in some really hard situations and had to make some tough choices.”

You pulled back and put your hand on his cheek, slightly scratchy from not shaving that day, and you spoke gently, “You are wonderful, Arvin. You are caring and hard working and loyal and willing to stand up for what is right. You are everything good in this world-”

“I hurt people-”

“You protect people,” you corrected, “‘N if some bad people had to get hurt to keep the good ones safe, well maybe they shouldn’t have been such bad people.”

Arvin could have melted into a puddle at your feet, and likely would have if you hadn’t been holding him. Never had he expected to tell anyone his terrible deeds and in every imagined scenario in which he did, it had never ended well. He had imagined you running for the hills, screaming at him to get out, maybe even threatening him physically out of fear that he’d hurt you now (which he’d never dream of doing).

But you didn’t do any of that. Gentleness and understanding were far from the reaction he’d expected or even felt like he deserved but nevertheless here you were holding him and reassuring him that he wasn’t the monster he’d called himself for so many months.

“I love you.”

His admission surprised you but Arvin felt fully confident in his words. He had never known what love felt like - romantic love at least - but this was damn near the closest thing he could imagine to it. You occupied his thoughts every waking moment, your face and your voice swimming around his imagination in a beautiful ocean of warmth and kindness and goodness that he would gladly drown in. You were strong and responsible and understanding and oh so beautiful. Much like him, you’d been handed a shit hand by life and struggled each day to make the best of it. Arvin cared about you so much it scared him because he had not felt this compulsion towards anyone since Lenora had passed. After losing everything he’d ever loved, he was scared that if he admitted that he loved you, life would take you away from him as well. If there was one thing that you did, though, it was take away Arvin’s fear.

“I love you too, Arvin.” He pulled your body flush against his when you responded, a heavy sigh of relief leaving his chest. Much like Arvin, you hadn’t known what real love felt like. You’d even started believing that maybe you weren’t meant for such a luxury.

Now you and Arvin felt like the richest people in the world, despite having almost nothing to your names. As long as you were in each others’ arms, you had everything. You were each others’ trust, honesty, comfort, compassion, and protection.

_______

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[contentgreenearth]

ANNOUNCEMENT: WHY I NO LONGER USE, AND WILL NEVER AGAIN USE, MBTI LETTER CLUSTER BEHAVIORS IN MY TYPINGS

Another thing that I noticed a lot of Jungian typologists using, that really screws up typings big time, are the MBTI letter cluster behaviors.

These are behaviors that are assigned to various MBTI letters clustered together. The idea to do this arose from Briggs and Myers, as they assign behaviors to ST, SF, NT and NF.

As I mentioned in the book review of Gifts Differing, the way that Briggs and Myers assigned behaviors to the letter clusters was by combining the total of all 4 types that had the same middle letters into one tally, not mentioning, for example, that the SFs who made up 61% of sales professionals, 44% of nurses and 42% of educators were almost entirely ESFJs 😯.

People who work with the Strong Type Indicator (a system that combines the MBTI and the Holland Career Inventory) says that SFs are going to score highest in the S (Social) career cluster, which is where nurses, teachers and sales professionals are all located. Well, from my own personal experience, and seeing what people who are typed correctly get for Holland Career Inventory results, I can tell you that yes, ESFJs do, in fact score highest in S. However, ISFJs tend to score higher in the C (conventional) career cluster, with positions like secretary, accountant, etc., than they do in the S career cluster. ESFPs and ISFPs on the other hand, often score low, or even *lowest* in the S(social) career cluster, because as S1s, they are more interested in physical work than mental work, so they tend to prefer the active career clusters of R (realistic) examples: skilled trades, culinary, transportation; A (artistic) self explanatory; and C (conventional) over the more passive career clusters of I (investigative) examples: scientist, doctor; E (enterprising) examples: management, marketing and S (social).

So anyway some people say that it was Briggs and Myers who also associated behaviors with the other letter clusters as well, doing like they did before, lumping all 4 types with the same series of letters together, even though the behavior associated came overwhelmingly from only 1 of the 4 types. And some say that Harold Grant did this. But whether Briggs and Myers did it, or Grant did it, it makes no difference. It was done. And it created one of the most inaccurate typing systems out there today, Type Dynamics.

In Type Dynamics, Grant takes 8 of these letter clusters, and calls them "functions". He calls the following letter cluster behaviors these "functions". He calls SP "Se", he calls SJ "Si", he calls NP "Ne", he calls NJ "Ni", he calls TJ "Te", he calls TP "Ti", he calls FJ "Fe", and he calls FP "Fi".

Disclaimer: a lot of people get confused by Grant's functions, because they think that they are the same as the functions Jung talks about in Psychological Types. To clear this up, they are *not* the same. I can write another blog post about that on a later date, but for now, know they are *not* the same.

Anyway, the point of this is, there's lots of MBTI purists and Jungian typologists out there who believe it's okay to use the MBTI letter cluster behaviors in typings, as long as you don't call them "functions". However, I've seen it leading to typings of all practical people as TPs, all compassionate people as SFs, all people who like to solve and create "brain teasers" as NPs, etc. I'd hate to say it, but that's causing a lot of mistypes, folks.

I quit using the letter cluster behaviors in typings about 6 months ago, because I realized that *the letter cluster behaviors are essentially the same thing as the Grant stack*. You will see I used them as confirmations in some of my early typings, such as the one I did on LiJo. But I have since ceased.

So yeah, I'd hate to tell those above mentioned MBTI purists and Jungian typologists, but if you're using the MBTI letter cluster behaviors in typings, you're using the very same Grant stack that you're speaking out against. You're just calling it by a different name. The MBTI letter cluster behaviors are the "functions" of the Grant stack, and the fact that you're not calling them "functions" like Grant did, doesn't change that. And gee, you see how accurate *NOT* Grant's Type Dynamics typing system is. So why are you using it in your typings, under a different name? Good question. Food for thought 🤔

Anyway, in summary, that's why I quit using the MBTI letter cluster behaviors in typings, and will never use them in typings ever again.

Off the soapbox. Rant over. Now back to our regularly scheduled program 😆😂🤣 Sorry, I just had to throw that last sentence in there 😅