#anyway im working on a little post about 'what if the narrator got put on meds at the start of the book'

[jacksprostate]

one of my favorite things to do is scroll through the fight club tag and go 'he would not fucking say that'

[geneticcatalyst]

as promised, an exploration of my one pet problem in fandom, or: misinterpretation of jby's first death (ft. zzs)

heres the thing. i occasionally see people reference what seems to be a misconception of the (english translation) text in qi ye. both the fact that its a translation and the metaphorical phrasing make it pretty clear to see why they got the wrong idea, but i firmly believe its still the wrong idea. i am by no means calling the people who got this mixed up dumb or bad, i am simply leaning over their shoulders going 'wait no bestie pls read that again pls read that one more time!!' because this is one of my favorite books and this thing is a key piece of one of my favorite things about it.

i said i was gonna pull screenshots for this post but i think it will be a little while before i get to another reread and i can't ctrl+f the google doc so im just gonna whip this out from memory. if anyone does have this particular passage on hand feel free to pop it in here. the rest of the context/explanations are just from my cursory research, im not chinese or a historian.

cards on the table. the only thing i love more than unhinged gay romances is unhinged platonic soul mates. its catnip to me. i go feral every goddamn time. and i havent stopped losing my mind about zhou zishu and jing beiyuan since that first qi ye scene. what do those guys have going on? not even sure they know but it's A Lot. ive got like 18 other unpublished drafts trying to work that out slash losing my fucking mind at the lengths they go to about each other. that relationship is at the center of both novels even if the spotlight isnt on it. so I admit that my readings are colored a bit by how much i like that they like each other!

which is why im shocked baffled and, ok, lightly salted, to see a few people make the claim that zishu (personally) tortured/killed beiyuan in his first life.

so what the text says is that after helian yi stopped trusting beiyuan (after su qingluan's accidental death), he was basically put to death. but even the emperor has to have a half decent reason to execute someone. the text describes these reasons- ten of them- as zhou zishu's masterpieces. it also refers to them as great shames to beiyuan's standing. what's happening is that helian yi has zishu frame beiyuan for treason or other betrayals against the emperor/the country. it isn't specific as to what, but it doesn't really matter, because its all fake and zishu is really good at his job. so yes, it is fair to say that zishu is the INSTRUMENT of beiyuan's death, but he didn't kill him, he just laid the groundwork.

the text goes on to another slightly confusing line where it says something to the effect of that when each of these accusations were read out in court, each line drew blood from jing beiyuan. that's a metaphor! it's just saying that his reputation was torn apart and ultimately his fate is sealed, despite the phrasing there are no literal injuries happening.

also, i may not have the timeline perfect on this part, but in zishu's introduction in the beginning of the novel, the narration tells us outright that while zishu is partially responsible for beiyuan's death, he was like. cool about it. in what seems to be the first and only time he ever steps out of line or goes against helian yi's command (!), after setting all this up but- if im remembering right- before the news actually breaks in court the next day, zishu warns beiyuan. now this admittedly doesnt do a whole lot because the only other possible option (cut and run) isn't a very good one, but it's the only thing zishu can do. he doesnt have to, but he does it anyway (!). of course beiyuan doesnt even consider doing this, he's stubborn and heartbroken, but he really seems to 1. appreciate the risk zishu took here to try to give him a chance and 2. not hold the whole set up against zishu or take that bit personally.

so what actually happened at the end of beiyuan's first life? he was sent the 3 zhang of white silk. the text does explicitly say this once, but if you're not familiar with the practice it may not click. receiving the white silk from the emperor is what happens when you're too high ranking to execute like a commoner but you've fallen from grace and are being politely asked to hang yourself in order to clear your name. and of course beiyuan, stubborn and heartbroken, does. yes, it's a forced suicide, but it isn't a murder.

anyway, its in that secret conversation, where zishu secretly meets with beiyuan seemingly to try to convince him to save himself and beiyuan outright refuses, that beiyuan promises that if theres a next life (ha), they'll get drunk together. and of course against all odds, there is and they do.

the thing about the idea that some people might think that zishu killed beiyuan is that after that nothing between them makes sense. even if it was at helian yi's request, i just cant see that not permanently damaging the friendship, i don't think beiyuan could immediately pick back up being best friends in the seventh life with that memory in the way. why would zishu go out of his way to warn beiyuan one day if he was perfectly capable and fine with killing him the next? why would beiyuan not only be happy to meet zishu again in the seventh life but also go out of his way trying to save zishu's? none of their other interactions really make sense if you believe there was a murder done there. idk. it clouds the whole throughline of the story which is that they have a bond!

i think maybe people think it is in character due to the other ruthless murders, and they're not wholly wrong, but that's the kicker for me. zishu will murder all kinds of innocents no questions asked, but he's suddenly trying to give an out to his coworker and drinking buddy? hello? thats insane, and that's the point.

furthermore, if you think maybe it would make sense for helian yi to have beiyuan violently killed (since it keeps fucking happening later), i actually have to become helian yi's lawyer for a moment here and say that that doesnt make sense either. helian yi is sitting on a throne gained by shadowy means but he's the Good Guy Ruler and that reputation is important. hes not a cruel person and he may have become paranoid but he still has a shared history with beiyuan. plus, even the emperor has to abide by a certain amount of decorum when he wants to have people killed, especially when that person is also a high ranking member of court. beiyuan's status is basically second only to the royal bloodline, he's essentially the prev emperor's godson, as well as a previously close confidante of helian yi himself. the white silk was regarded as a privileged, dignified means of offing someone. helian yi is perfectly within social acceptability to do this to beiyuan with the pretext of beiyuan's disgrace. but it would be pushing the boundaries for the good and just emperor to suddenly have one of his top advisors and members of high nobility brutally killed like a common criminal. he could probably do it, but it would reflect on him and his reputation too. he could do it in secret, but would have to cover up the disappearance of a prominent court figure. it just makes sense to use the white silk as the neatest, most acceptable legal justice channel here. maintain emotional detachment, be polite, everybody's honor gets honored and such.

so that's the ted talk. theres even some beautiful fanart on here of white-haired first life beiyuan holding the white silk! he wasn't tortured or outright executed, and he chose to obey rather than escape or fight the false claims of treason even though his friend tried to give him the only out he could manage. to interpret things differently really skews the character motivations and plot for everyone- beiyuan, zishu, helian yi- in a way that warps the story out of believability, imho.

[selfdiagnosedeyemotif]

hey hi hello iris you dont need to add anything to this ask

————————————————————-

I just want you to post this ask because im curious how this line break will look when its posted

Scripts.com Bee Movie By Jerry Seinfeld NARRATOR: (Black screen with text; The sound of buzzing bees can be heard) According to all known laws of aviation, : there is no way a bee should be able to fly. : Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. : The bee, of course, flies anyway : because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. BARRY BENSON: (Barry is picking out a shirt) Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. : Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. JANET BENSON: Barry! Breakfast is ready! BARRY: Coming! : Hang on a second. (Barry uses his antenna like a phone) : Hello? ADAM FLAYMAN: (Through phone) - Barry? BARRY: - Adam? ADAM: - Can you believe this is happening? BARRY: - I can't. I'll pick you up. (Barry flies down the stairs) : MARTIN BENSON: Looking sharp. JANET: Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. BARRY: Sorry. I'm excited. MARTIN: Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. : A perfect report card, all B's. JANET: Very proud. (Rubs Barry's hair) BARRY= Ma! I got a thing going here. JANET: - You got lint on your fuzz. BARRY: - Ow! That's me! JANET: - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! (Barry flies out the door) JANET: Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! (Barry drives through the hive,and is waved at by Adam who is reading a newspaper) BARRY== - Hey, Adam. ADAM: - Hey, Barry. (Adam gets in Barry's car) : - Is that fuzz gel? BARRY: - A little. Special day, graduation. ADAM: Never thought I'd make it. (Barry pulls away from the house and continues driving) BARRY: Three days grade school, three days high school... ADAM: Those were awkward. BARRY: Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. ADAM== You did come back different. (Barry and Adam pass by Artie, who is jogging) ARTIE: - Hi, Barry! BARRY: - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. ADAM: - Hear about Frankie? BARRY: - Yeah. ADAM== - You going to the funeral? BARRY: - No, I'm not going to his funeral. : Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. : Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. ADAM: I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. (The car does a barrel roll on the loop-shaped bridge and lands on the highway) : I love this incorporating an amusement park into our regular day. BARRY: I guess that's why they say we don't need vacations. (Barry parallel parks the car and together they fly over the graduating students) Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. (Barry and Adam sit down and put on their hats) : - Well, Adam, today we are men. ADAM: - We are! BARRY= - Bee-men. =ADAM= - Amen! BARRY AND ADAM: Hallelujah! (Barry and Adam both have a happy spasm) ANNOUNCER: Students, faculty, distinguished bees, : please welcome Dean Buzzwell. DEAN BUZZWELL: Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... : ...9: : That concludes our ceremonies. : And begins your career at Honex Industries! ADAM: Will we pick our job today? (Adam and Barry get into a tour bus) BARRY= I heard it's just orientation. (Tour buses rise out of the ground and the students are automatically loaded into the buses) TOUR GUIDE: Heads up! Here we go. ANNOUNCER: Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. BARRY: - Wonder what it'll be like? ADAM: - A little scary. TOUR GUIDE== Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco : and a part of the Hexagon Group. Barry: This is it! BARRY AND ADAM: Wow. BARRY: Wow. (The bus drives down a road an on either side are the Bee's massive complicated Honey-making machines) TOUR GUIDE: We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life : to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. : Honey b

[evanescentdawn]

1. Share a song that makes you think of "me and you" 🥺 and also 3. Heh

hi, haku <3 thanks for sending this in ^^ I went ham as usual

also would u look at this. i actually Finished answering this and did not leave it to rot in my drafts for many months ahem which I think deserves a golden sticker. a great yuki feat for nov 2023

1. Share a song that makes you think of “me n you”

UHH…. honestly don’t remember what song I was listening to when writing that fic but def was in my touken playlist. but mmmmh. “spring thief” + “thought crime” by yorushika because the vibes are FITTING. I do not think by lyrics fjfjjfjfjf

3. What’s your favorite fic that you’ve written?

currently it’s my v beloved, hands under the scorch of the sun (we loved once) (once that is not now) (anymore)

every time i go thro my ao3, which has been a lot lately honestly lol I go so unwell when I see it. ITS THE !!!!! FIC !!!!! I love it so much it’s SO fun it’s so great it’s thee best. I was on a roll when I was writing it

AND OH THE TITLE. OH THE TITKE it’s so great. great as in im So ASHHSHDJDJDAHHHHHH oh my god. I was so Real for it. as my past me wrote “*explodes* —> me” in the end author notes, so v true and noted.

I love v dearly and it’s current fav because of HOW I WROTE IT. the unsaidnsss the tension it goes SO hard it’s unreal. it’s weird in a way too because it’s???? not at all typical way I write???? like WHAT is “casts a look” I never use those kind of phrases or write ways I did in this which is why it makes it so fun and so weird. also PUTHOR/SKALES !!!!!!!! this two make me so unreal for real. ever time I see this fic my longing to finish is another puthor/Skales is so v great. MY BELOVED SNAKES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

also HEH I’ve been actually been thinking about this fic today. well, technically it was kinda yesterday since it’s 3am rn. don’t ask why I am awake. ANYWAYS, some thoughts I had. like I read this post on “narration distance” and it got me Thinking about it (by that came to learn some v interesting Very Cool stuff about this draft I made yesterday? about Ichigo & Rukia lol) and was looking at my other work and i came to this one again and the start of it:

“pythor casts a look at skales. “what are you doing here?” >>

it immediately starts with a zoom-in, no easing into the character or the scene. fanfiction being a exploration of characters you already know makes this fun sandbox where you can start fics zoomed-in and it won’t be jarring in some ways because the readers assumingky ALREADY know this (assumingky as I’ve Read fics for fandom I know jack shit) anyways. I kinda forgot what sort of thoughts I had then, but. anyways.

I love it drops right into the action of things, no set up for the setting or what not. also I love how it starts hard with “Pythor” the little distance between the narration and “Pythor” right from the beginning puts a focus on Pythor. its an immediate invitation to this pythor’s world. also the way that skales is also referred to as their name in pythor’s pov, instead of a pronoun — putting focus on puthor&skales relationship and creating this smaller distance between the reader and these characters. it’s would be different to read “Pythor casts a look at them” as it makes Skales unknown and puts a distance between the narration and the “them” who is unknown. But instead, it was “Pythor casts a look at Skales” >> it gives importance to Skales as a character in this moment and significant to Pythor itself

and then looking at the entire sentence, at the middle bit that connects Pythor and Skales, “casts a look”. the verb “casts” is very fun sounding and especially the way it’s “k” and “s” sounds give it intensity and the way it it’s a deliberate action that is stressed with the word “cast” is written phonetically. it gives the following “a look” phrase a intensity.

also interesting how “casts” immediately follows “Pythor” putting Pythor…. andddd stoping myself here because my head is hurting. trying to articulate yourself is blergh. anyways V COOL START I LOVE IT V MUCH

also my fav ever part in this fic that makes me *scream*

“i’m here for a proposal.”

skales slithers closer, and skales’ hand is not touching pythor’s but — it’s a close thing.

“for a marriage union.” skales says. eyes firm and not breaking away from pythor’s, saying everything that skales’ mouth isn’t.

something that pythor doesn’t want to translate.

like WHAT IF I EXPLODED. god god god the “skales slithers closer, and skales’ hand is not touching pythor’s but — it’s a close thing.” is my favourite thing EVER

the repetition of “skales” putting emphasis on Skales themselves and everything they are doing. also I LOVE “slithers closer” slithers has this snakey-sneaky feeling to it also the alteration of “Skales slithers” has a nice ring it to. also AHHHH the “closer” it gives it like a tension of some kind. but it doesn’t stop there it goes AND SKALES’ HAND IS NOT TOYCHKNG PYTHOR’S what if I exploded fr. I love the focus on “Skales’ hand” and the way it’s not touching pythor’s. Like the fact it’s not pythor’s is significant!!!!!!!!!!!! it’s about the HANDS, and the NEGATIVE SPACE BETWEEN SKALES AND PYTHORS HANDS and the way the me continues this with the “but” and the dramatic pause of the emdash and says ITS A CLOSE THING

screaming. screeching. OH this is so good. OH this is so brilliant. I love it to death

also HELLOOOO “saying everything that skales’ mouth isn’t.” GAHHH AHHH AHHHHHHHH and that ENDING OF

“something that pythor doesn’t want to translate.”

the way!!!!!! nothing is like said!!!! the way the something that Pythor doesn’t want to translate is never said what it is!!!!!!!! but Pythor does know what it is but it DOESNT want to translate it. the way the whole passage has “Skales’ mouth” “Skales hand” “eyes firm” like as if ever part of Skales is saying something. it’s SO NNNNNGHHH good like give it to me

also the way a… lot of things of these things were accidentally LOL as I was trying to djdjdj write without using pronouns which is a challenge but also creates this super fun effect that im so loving. its so cool. this fic is so cool. I love it v dearly. PYTHOR/SKALES !!!!!!!!!!! OF MY HEART HEHHEHEHHE

also hello the way Skales is so active in this part. the way they slither closer, the way THEIR hand is close to pythor’s and the way THEIR eyes are firm and not moving away from pythor’s. the way !!! Skales only talks !!!! both verbally and a lot thro their body language as well. meanwhile Pythor is just There and while its their pov, it looks like Skales has taken the spotlight. and it finishs with “something that pythor doesn’t want to translate.” LIKE PYTHOR !!!! KNOWS WHAT SKALES IS TRYING TO SAY AND KNOWS SKAES BUT IT DOESNT WANT TO TRANSLATE IT !!!!! IT WANTS TO REJECT IT !!!!!!

also the way the ending just drops off! it doesn’t say what pythor’s responding answer is! it leave u hanging SCREAMING on this heightened tension screams OH its So good so v in love with it heh

def my fav piece right now <3 <3 <3 the Pythor/Skales is so Strong sighs longingly I wish to write more for them but working on the two ideas I have right now is to much work urgh and trying to make more ideas provides to be Hard cuz brain empty only Pythor/skales no idea NDJJDKDJDJD <3 so Helpful lol

ANYWAYS SO THERE IS!!!!! MY PYTHOR/SKALES!!!!!!! FIC !!!!!!!!

im so normal btw abt the title. refraining myself so bad into going into it because i do have not the spoons for that rn JDJKDKDKDKD

[ahiijny]

glass onion spoilers

ok this movie was fun, but it fell a bit short of expectations 😅 y'all hyped this up a bit too much (note: i did not watch the other knives out movie yet so maybe im missing out on some context)

I thought this was going to be this awesome keikaku murder mystery with this likeable queer and fruity detective guy where everyone rips down the curtain of lies set up by this tech billionaire and it is revealed mr. miles rich guy actually has no idea what he's doing and all of his accomplishments were stolen from other people

I guess we kinda get that in a sense, but I guess reality just outdid fiction this time if you know what I mean... so it wasnt nearly as satisfying

I guess that's kind of the point of this movie, as benoit himself points out: it looks complicated, but it's actually not. (and thats why he had so much trouble solving the mystery, bc hes not good at solving dumb puzzles, only clever ones lol) but that still doesnt make it satisfying.

anyway, my thoughts about the movie!

the masking and covid callbacks remember those ah memoriesssss (man)

ok but if this entire movie were about this scientist guy trying to do science engineering work while pushing back against unrealistic expectations from overzealous entrepreneurs/business ppl i would watch that...

i liked the part where the lady was like "you've got to stay off the twitter" to the other lady, this is relatable and realistic and a good message

puzzles are fun. i liked the peoples working together to solve the puzzles. if this entire movie were about a diverse group of friends solving puzzles in a collaborative way i would watch that...

shoutout to manosphere guy's mom she dont give af but she's hella clever, she's solving these puzzles and she doesn't even care lol

(also dude be more respectful to your mom. doesnt matter if ur streaming, ppl will understand if u have to take a brief interruption to answer to something. if they dont understand, u do not want them watching ur stream)

benoit amogus (this is probably pandering but i am the target audience so i will accept the pandering. if this entire movie were just benoit and his friends/colleagues playing among us i would watch that...)

the way the ppl all have their different attitudes towards masking strictness and runs the full gamut, that's just really interesting to analyze. i saw the tumblr post about this and i thought benoit was actually going to narrate these observations and it wouldve been really impressive 😅 I guess it's actually more subtle than that...

ok but what IS that spray. how does it work. i know u dont have to explain EVERYTHING in a story but the nerd in me wants to know pls pls pls (does it even work lol)

"piece of shit" hehehehe

benoit very charming and there was some awkward tension in the air bc everyone else is tightly knit and he's a newcomer but he talks through it easily enough so my feelings of social anxiety werent too bad in these scenes lol

everyone talking and socializing (ergh) and dropping various bits of information and im like 'i dont even remember their NAMES im definitely not gonna remember all these little factoids which are sure to be relevant later lol' (help)

the part where benoit is sneaking around and spying on ppl, i feel like maybe they could have leaned even more into the comedy here if they wanted to. like. they have manosphere guy spying on miles rich guy and other lady doing the sussy and he clenches his fists in anger but later it's revealed actualyl she is trying to persuade miles rich guy to put manosphere guy on his news thingy or something but miels was refusing so actually manosphere guy was clenching his fist in anger because of that and benoit was behind the bushes watching the whole thing but also helen was behind both of them watching the whole thing as well

i know it probably makes cinematic sense for them to do this, but i wish helen and benoit had been a bit quieter/vague about their discussions bc i was in constant fear that they would be overheard and someone would be like "hey why is your accent different" bc as the previous scenes have shown, eavesdropping people and recording devices are EVERYWHERE (god)

and as modern technology and even death note potato chips scene have taught me. why would you ever NOT assume that your rooms are not bugged. like. recording devices are cheap and tiny. and you're in a rich guy's mansion that he had built for himself and he has a huge ego and doesnt care about other peoples agency. I would be paranoid that there would be hidden cameras and microphones everywhere (dsfosdfjsoijfds)

the part where benoit explained away the entire mystery that miles had someone else write up for him was fun, if the entire movie were just ppl chucking mystery puzzles at the guy and him just explaining everything i would watch that...

tho eq-wise this was a bit like if you're the best tetris player in the world and you enter the lobby of some very casual player and their friends and no one is playing faster than 0.5pps and then you demolish everyone at 5pps with ms2 dpc loop and then the streamer is like "well I guess this isnt our stream anymore it's theirs" that's a bit bm... (we actually kinda do have this problem in the tetrio community and someone even made a video about it)

social anxiety DID HE JUST COMMIT A FAUX-PAS BY BEING TOO OP i do appreciate that he commented on doing it intentionally afterwards (ok so he's aware) bc he was concerned someone would try to actually kill miles

when the pretty dress lady was spinning around and was like "look at me!" i was like 'ok this is obviously a distraction and somehting sneaky is going to happen' but it was too flashy and distracting so i didnt notice anything lol ^_^;;

my first thought was that someone tried to poison miles and poisoned manosphere guy by accident, so when ppl went to their initial conclusions i was like ok that makes sense

okokokookok the flashback

initially i was sus of helen's story. i thought she was andi, but pretending to be a nonexistant twin sister for some reason. her story seemed a bit too clean. like. maybe she fabricated this murder mystery to pique the interest of the best detective in the world to help her with her task, since maybe he wouldn't be interested otherwise. and then benoit would poke some holes in her story and then she would reveal that actually the story was a fabrication but she was desperate and benoit would have some sympathy and would help her out regardless

the movie went on for a while before i was like. 'oh ok, the other shoe isn't dropping... she really is who she says she is??'

(you have to understand my experience in these kind of genres involve ppl like L and Naomi Misora and Junko Enoshima and Celeste Ludenberg its RARE for characters to actually just have been telling the truth the entire time so you have to understand why i was doubtful >_<;;)

i was expecting one of the others to have reset the box and sent it to benoit and then he solved the puzzles and went to the island but no the box benoit received was the one helen smashed to bits lmaoooooo. benoit is so smooth i completely fell for that.

i like all the parts where benoit was like "elementary child puzzles" or something and it made miles look kinda annoyed hehe

ok the false memory thing DOES happen, it's true! when he said it, everyone remembered differently. memory is notoriously unreliable. this is true

ok i know barely anything about business or law but i feel like theres so much more andi couldve done to protect her ownership of the company. like. documentation/photographs of the napkin? patents? on the other hand, as recent events have shown, it is also notoriously easy for a charming guy with money to completely sway public opinion with a strong enough propaganda machine so i guess fair enough...

also i feel like that conversation kinda escalated a bit too quickly. "hey i have new idea KLEAN will energy the world poggers" "no it too dangerous it will blow up the world" "no c'mon" "i will BISECT THIS COMPANY"

like. hindsight is 2020 but. give toddler something to play with rather than taking it away altogether. right?...

also i feel like my watching of medical jdramas has skewed my view of what is realistic, but. i feel like everyone gave up a bit TOO easily after manosphere guy stopped breathing. no one even attempted CPR? does no one have like. epipens or something (idk how pineapple allergies work)

also that little hint at the beginning slipped by me. i thought he just didnt like the taste of pineapples lol (relatable), didnt know that he was actually allergic

the dietary restrictions thing in the invite was actually kinda considerate of miles rich guy tho. i mean, u know, aside from the fact that he exploited this very thing to murder his dear friend

also do the police not have. helicopters

whys it gotta be boats

continued bc apparently 4096 character limit per text block

maybe they shouldve added like a thunderstorm or something. or a cut to the police station where they're like "it's that guy again (ugh), let's deal with this in the morning..."

i am happy helen survived tho. guns scary... especially when they are pointed at you lol

NOT THE HOT SAUCE IN THE NOSE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO this legit was one of the most stressful scenes in the movie lol

i get so stressed anytime there's clearly an actor playing a dead body in a movie bc then im imagining the actor having to lie still without moving or breathing at all and that just makes me anxious lol

ok but why did andi even NEED this dude, she shouldve just made alpha or whatever on her own. unless it's maybe just the. stereotypical white, charismatic figurehead to appease the investors maybe. idk

benoit getting mad at miles rich guy for stealing his murder mystery ideas is the funniest thing

but also i know this is a movie but girl why would you bring out the napkin. just hide it, get off the island, and show it! or at least make a few decoys! take pictuers at least?? whyd u let yourself get outwitted by miles rich guy this is so sad

the smashing glass thing is cathartic but i was also cringing bc all that flying sharp glass in the air and floor does NOT look safe. and also who's gonna clean it up afterwards you're making more work for the poor staff of this resort place :c

also. do u have a death wish. why would you throw that in there when you are THERE in the room. headlines: MILES BRON AND OTHERS DIE IN EXPLOSION ON PRIVATE ISLAND RESORT (ONLY SURVIVORS ARE WORLD'S GREATEST DETECTIVE AND SOME GUY) idk

while the mona lisa burning is funny and LONG expected since the protection barrier thing was introduced and IS probably not the real one since something about wood panel vs. canvas. i just. do not like destroying art man. tho i probably dont care as much bc it is something coveted by rich people. but still.

also imo this isn't the slam dunk they think it is bc if miles rich guy WERE smart, there's a billion ways he could spin this to his favour

it's pretty much his word against theirs but if he uses his money wisely he can easily drum up propaganda support for this, even if his former friends turned against him

e.g. "ex-Alpha founder who never contributed anything and was actually a leech (true story) throw a tantrum on island resort and used bottle rockets/dynamite/whatever other flammable things there are that DEFINITELY arent Klean to destroy PRICELESS work of art'

wait he killed andi, that wont work

'twin sister of ex-Alpha founder who in an irrational, bereaved fit of rage, destroys PRICELESS work of at'

there we go (miles huffs proudly as if he thought of this idea himself and definitely not as if one of the propaganda firms he hired thought it up for him)

ok but who is that other guy. what is his story. why is he on the island

also, helen girlboss destroying his stuff is satisfying but imo not nearly as satisfying as miles rich guy just destroying his OWN stuff just from sheer incompetence

right now he can escape into the mental copespace of "that woman destroyed my (yes definitely my) lifes work, i will have my revenge". i am worried, bc as recent events have shown, it IS possible, even if you are confirmed guilty, to just skedaddle on out of prison, because of technicalities or whatever

and he will probably still have his diehard fans on his side

the future worries me

sdifgos jsgiojf gdoisdgjdiogj

so in the end, i guess. not really satisfying in the sense of a keikaku whodunnit, and I didnt really vibe with many of the characters either, except for benoit, and manosphere guy's mom, and benoit's... husband? (idk who he is but he seems chill), and helen is neat too but i feel like her characterization was a bit too infodump/exposition heavy

i guess if i look at it more in the lens of a social commentary comedy rather than a murder mystery itd be more up to expectations. but still. not really my cup of tea i guess

7.4/10

[thegongoozlerreacts]

Welcome Home: Homewarming Update

ok so. yes i KNOW its been like several weeks already since this has been first updated and im very much late to the party (thankfully not late enough to have missed everything) but i was soooo freaking busy since the update dropped, and now i finally have the time to check it out!!!! lets GOOO!!!

spoilers under the cut

so number one thing i noticed: new link and in fact, new site domain (is that what its called?? well my point is that it's no longer being hosted by wix which yeah, that makes sense)

another thing i noticed is there are no more bug videos and doodle audio (aww)

i havent checked if the askew letter links still work but i will check now

ok just checked and nope! does not work, which means most of the secret links prior to this website change are no longer working (unsure if they'll be added back later on, but i hope they will) it's not too bothersome that they're gone, since im sure they've all been uploaded somewhere on YouTube, but it's more fun going to the actual links myself hehe

anyways! moving on to the actual update

Christmas!! or, as they call it, Homewarming

the little doodles are cute, however I am a bit suspicious of the star with its red eye (but the ham is most suspicious, what's it doing there in a tree?!?!?)

interesting placement for this tree, since it is boxing in a letter

i wonder if that means there's some new secret links? i'll take note of it

now, let's head over to the News page

he is presenting jello to me

so the post regarding the actual update is dated as December 25 2023, followed by a correction where the person says they're unsure how they made that mistake

lolol nice we got Christmas in spring

anyways, it says that there are toys, more cookbook pages, AND more vinyl records!! excited to check these out!!

let's head on over to the Merchandise page

??? CIGARETTES????

bro 😭😭 who thought it was a good idea to sell child-friendly tobacco pipes,,, thats crazy,,, also another brand mention: Hooplah cigarettes

ok so among the website changes, there's also some changes to old stuff, such as the telephone (the layout for the audio is different, and it seems Wally's audio is no longer there (not even hidden, like before)

new cookbook pages!

the first ten pages are of various hotdogs with one-sentence puns about them,, incredible

this one is my favorite LMFAOOO

DD: OH NO !!!

the crispy sweets pancakes look like they'll give me diabetes

the single pea in gelatin recipe is singlehandedly the funniest recipe i've ever seen because like,,, you made a whole gelatin, and you put just a single pea in the center of it,, just one.. LMFAOOOO

Julie's gelatin just. makes you put in a whole MUG in the gelatin?!??!?!? a mug full of hot cocoa??!? at least Frank's gelatin is edible all throughout?!?!?!

bye i saw 'Poppy Partridge' and the picture of a turkey and i was like '?? yOU COOKED HER???' but then i read the full title and it says it's a bird-free birdseed turkey LMFAO

perfect. the best recipe in this whole cookbook, im sure

there's a cigarette here?? even tho this isnt the smoking merch?? its a book??

so the book is a catalogue for toys and merch they were selling during the holidays, very cool

hELP THEY LOOK SO SILLY

what did they do to my boys 😭😭 his forehead is MASSIVE

lowkey tho i want that Julie Build-Your-Own-Game Kit cuz like wow, that is a bunch of toys in that one kit n its really cheap????

oh my god i just realized. the Marlo logo looks like a swirly eye inside a house what the hell

anywyas now its time for the radio advertisement ft. Santa himself

hmm interesting how the ad ends in glitchy noises upon saying Eddie's name, the only one who was not mentioned with a specific set unlike the others (tho that may not be that important of a detail)

next up is another storybook record! featuring Wally singing a song??!? awesoem

sorry im laughing at the absolute difference in tone and energy between the Narrator and Wally

Narrator's got a boisterous loud voice and then cut to Wally in his little low-energy voice LMFAO

Barnaby and Wally are so cute together <333

FRANK: How I would say what? JULIE: What who would the huh?

LMFAO the way Julie said her line was way too funny

FRANK: (Frank greets Wally Warmly, but is cold with Barnaby.) Hello, Wally. Barnaby. BARNABY: (Said in a similar tone mockingly.) Hiya Jewels! Frank.

Frank and Barnaby fighting is honestly one of the funniest dynamics in the whole Neighborhood to me

Julie goes into hibernation?? legit ??? nice

HELP ME WALLY JUST DEADPAN SAYING 'Shush.' TO BARNABY'S LOUD ASS VOICE LMFAOOAOA

i dont think the 'Caninus Coccinellidae' is a real bug that exists, since i tried searching it up and only got coccinellidae in general i wonder what exactly this insect is, since the word 'caninus' means it relates to canines or dogs a dog ladybug sounds like a very interesting creature

help did Howdy somehow sneak an advertisement for his store in the narrator's script 😭😭 incredible

i really like Howdy's voice, its really fitting for him

SALLY IS CLIMBING THE TREE?????

she's climbing it to stay the biggest star in town LMFAO

is she just gonna be there the whole season or something??? at least her outfit slays???

i love how dramatic Sally is but like girlie dont fall off the tree??!??!?!

oh Santa Claus mention

this talk about food is making me hungry LOL

wait did the narrator just say that all the neighborhood's been accounted for?? but what about Eddie??? he hasnt shown up??

what the hell?? what's that weird noise in the back of Wally saying 'How can that be?' is it a voice? it kinda sounds like its saying something

well this was a very cute story (still wondering where Eddie is)

after this is audio of Wally singing!! more Wally singing!! very cool

and now we've got an album of (almost) everyone else singing too!

interestingly, there's a drawing of an envelope on the audio tab thing i wonder if thats important

Sally's really good at singing actually all their singing voices are really good

SALLY: Juliette, I fell from the sky, you fell from a house... LMFAO they're so silly

next up is a track featuring Howdy's family? oooh

i cant believe his mom and dad are named 'Hiya' and 'Biya' respectively,,, amazing,, is the rest of the family gonna be named with words used for greetings and farewells??

his brother is named Latter tho oh,, Latter like 'later' like 'see ya later' because his sister and brother are named Seeya and Latter and wow,,,, amazing

also Howdy's clear favorites LMFAO

ok i kinda feel bad for Latter that Howdy likes his brother-in-law more than his own brother 😭

also?? Seeya and Beeya's kids being named Howdo and Youdo??? amazing lmao

also its interesting how on the album cover you can see how Howdy's parents and his sister have wings but theyre still caterpillars???

i think its really funny that there's just some random person there named 'Sue' who isnt even part of the family LMFAOO

also the grandma being named Sally Tations is really clever i think

Barnaby showing up at the end only adds fuel to the fire of my Barnaby x Howdy ship

and now its the tobacco pipe merch that absolutely baffles me

the ad audio features Barnaby and Howdy advertising it to Howdy's nephews,,,,, at least theyre not letting them smoke for real?????

now we got a Frank solo album where he sings a song about hibernation, cute

Even if I might not be able to see you, I know it’s for the best, I can’t keep you,

OUCH? this song is kinda sad what the fuck 😭😭 aww Frank :(((

more merchandise after this is some greeting cards for homewarming that are very cute, but not much to see other than a hibernating Julie and Barnaby and Wally being besties

after that is a crispy sweets frosted cereal, that apparently has a holiday-themed decoder ring?? with Eddie?? hmmm interesting

OH MY GOD. THE LITTLE DRAWINGS ALL OVER THE SITE ARE FOR THIS DECODER RING???

but whats the key?? is it just this as it is on the box? is there another clue on the site?

ok i think first i will finish checking all the pages before going around and looking for the symbols

checking the guestbook, and while you still cant submit anything new, it seems there also is just... no more guestbook?? thats too bad

theres new Homewarming stickers!! i love them theyre so cute!! everyone in a snowglobe doing things that we've heard them doing in the storybook audios! nice nice

nothing new in media, the 'whats welcome home' page, and the about us page (besides the Homewarming symbols)

oh actually something notable about the About Us page is that there is no longer any of the glitchy overlayed text, which makes sense since they mention in the News page that the website is free of bugs and glitches

aww everyone's homes in The Neighborhood page are all Homewarming-themed now! hmm except for Home and Eddie's post office

well, you can see a decorated Home when you enter the page but the Post Office being the only not decorated even a bit is interesting,,, Eddie also wasnt in the Homewarming Storybook Record,,, hmmmm

i dont know if it means anything but it is interesting

the staff only version of The Playfellow Exhibition is no longer on the site (or if it is i cant find it)

well it seems like i've gone through every new thing besides the secret code, which i think might be a link, since on the guestbook page there were 3 symbols that looked like a genie's lamp, which translates to 'w' so its probably a link

actually, now that im looking at it closer its probably like. a cup like the one that pours out gravy in the dinner scene in Coraline

ok im pretty sure i've got all the symbols scattered over the site, but i have NO idea what order they should be in

i, o, m, a, a, r, e, t, y, g, y, e, r, f, s, n, e, w, n, w, w, w, y

maybe instead of a link its a scrambled message?

ok i honestly have no idea where to go from here so,,, searching the internet it is !!

OK!!! since i am so incredibly late to the party, i've found the secret code on the internet kakakka

it is this https://www.awayfrompryingeyes.net

oh that makes sense,,, its a phrase that was similar to one used in the news update about Homewarming "Don’t you feel at peace exploring these pages? Free from worry? From prying eyes?"

very very interesting! lets check it out

very very interesting indeed,, ok so basically this site is gonna be an archive for the secrets from before, and all entries are signed 'W' which is very interesting too

the person writing these seem to be the creator of the site? or at least someone who manages the site

lets check out the evidence thats been archived here so far

ok so i think these evidences are actually NEW things which is cool! presumably past secrets (such as the bug videos, doodle audios, askew letters and others) will be added onto here at some point in time

now lets listen to this phone call that 'W' has gotten from Wally himself

so Wally is singing Toyland again

i wonder if there will ever come a time where we can be able to respond or communicate with Wally

he mentions that Barnaby will be here soon hmm tbh when the site first launched i had read some theories that maybe Wally was literally physically isolated from the rest of the neighborhood (something to do with the so below stuff i think?) but if Wally is being a reliable narrator (as in, he's telling the truth that Barnaby really is gonna visit him soon), then that disproves that

he seems to be left alone most of the time tho i think?? well at least now during Homewarming season since he said everyone's busy

he might not be physically isolated from the rest of the neighborhood, but he probably still feels pretty lonely :((

anyways, the next evidence is under 'commercials' i wonder what this will be

omg??? animated stuff??? thats so cool :000 an animated commercial for crispy sweets, incredible

oh! a commercial for the cookbook why is there just. a ham?? under the tree ?? i think the one single pea on a plate is the funniest gag ever

Wally's ball and cup,,,, what does it say about me that even tho its not real i still want it??? its said to be made by the 'you-wont-believe-it' company, which is interesting since im pretty sure so far the only companies noted to be involved with Welcome Home is Playfellow, Marlo, and the crispy sweet cereal so now we've got another affiliation (oh and the cigarette brand, Hooplah)

commercial for the "Homewarming Harmonies for Hearth and Home" Album, featuring a duet with Frank and Poppy!! Poppy's voice sounds really good also the Homewarming tree is made of food???

A COMMERCIAL FEATURING EDDIE ?? Eddie who has been suspiciously absent from the Homewarming festivities??

ah i see... Eddie's been working during Homewarming huh? maybe thats why the Post Office isnt decorated and he wasnt in the storybook record? cuz he was working??? no but thats weird,, Wally and Barnaby were walking around so surely they wouldve at least bumped into him delivering stuff?? maybe he was in his post office then?

an ad-break card with Frank and Sally, cute cute i remember there was a similar holiday-themed 'we'll be right back' card with Frank and Julie decorating a cake, i wonder if that will appear here?

OH?? a commercial featuring Barnaby's mom?? aww ok their dynamic is cute (even if its just a commercial for eggnog)

OMG ANOTHER ANIMATED COMMERCIAL WITH HOWDY AND BARNABY its for the cigarettes LOL

EDDIE AGAIN oH NO I FEEL SO BAD FOR HIM IS HE ALONE ON THE HOLIDAYS??? SO HE'S JUST BEEN IN THE POST OFFICE THIS WHOLE TIME BY HIMSELF???? PLEASE,,,, EDDIE GO OUTSIDE or someone like. go inside or call this man i cant take the idea of Eddie being alone wtf?!??!?!?

and now an ad-break card with Poppy and Julie

and now what i think is a continuation of the commercial for the Homewarming album

NOOOOOOOO EDDIE....... GO OUTSIDE JUST DONT WORK...... PLEASE..... someone give this man something to deliver GAH he's mad ?!??! Eddie Dear please go outside (SOMEONE TALK TO THIS MAN) he's played several games of tic-tac-toe by himself,,,, my guy,,,, go on that walk thank you

the fact that Eddie isnt in ANY of these commercials,, oh my god,,,,,,,

another continuation for the Homewarming album

Sally, Julie, and Poppy singing together,,, thats so cute,,

i cant. everyone hanging out together in these commercials with no Eddie in sight i feel so bad

FRANK AND SALLY FIGHTING?!??!

is this a commercial for sleeping pills????? im ??? this show is so so crazy like ?? the in-universe show i mean,, cuz what?? they got so many merchandise and records and a bunch of brand deals and its all just been wiped?!??!?! like ?? what happened???

oh no time to dwell on that we got Sally and Eddie lets go he's getting some social interaction

lets go he has a happy ending he's at the party !!!

ok i read ahead in the transcript and oh no im afraid now ?? Eddie?? hello?? Eddie are you ok?? i dont think this man is ok he needs help oh my god what is this

im scared LOL this was not a good idea to do at 3 am im really unnerved right now but mostly i think this guy needs help someone please help him

something about reality is shattering for him i think??? maybe ?? its the way the video is going back and forth between live-action scenes and a drawing of Eddie's face (and Home's eyes)

jesus that was a jumpscare with Frank's voice coming in out of the silence

ah its still all glitchy and distorted i dont know what's the correct term for what Eddie is experiencing but he is NOT having a good time

FRANK SWITCHING FROM CALLING HIM 'MR. DEAR' TO 'EDDIE' HAS ME ILL being in Eddie's perspective with static in the ears while he's looking down is so. i dont know how to explain it but its uncomfortable and unnerving (which is probably what he's feeling)

the fact that he only looks up after Frank probably shook his shoulders or something to get his attention ughdjskdhfkjdssjkjkew (cuz his arms are outstretched when the camera pans up to look at his face/when Eddie looks up at Frank)

bro that was a jumpscare with the narrator after like,, that whole segment i guess

so rewatching that last bit when Eddie seems to be like. present enough to respond/say something or be aware of whats going on i guess, the screen gets less glitchy and distorted and thats like a nice detail

so thats why Eddie’s been kinda just,, missing from the Homewarming on the actual site

i hope Eddie turns out ok :(((( PLEASE THIS STORY NEEDS TO HAVE A HAPPY ENDING OR I WILL CRY SO HARD THAT I WILL TRANSFORM INTO AN OYSTER

interestingly W’s note after the compiled commercials says that “the show never appeared beyond clips of Eddie Dear”

so all those segments with Eddie were, i guess, the ‘holiday special’ that the commercials were interrupting and all

thats so so crazy,, im so late to the party but i honestly dont even know where to begin with all of that but like. im rooting for you Eddie !!!!!

well thats it for now, until the next update! make sure to wave up high, neighbors

[galacticlamps]

im sorry im sorry im sorry i know it’s been well over a year but i accidentally thought about Short Trips: Deleted Scenes (again) and it’s killing me (again) so i think im just gonna go ahead and post all these stupid thoughts that have been plaguing me about it since i first heard it & maybe that’ll help clear up some space in my head for like, real life things.

Spoilers I guess? It’s like a year and a half old but also high key the most recent 2nd doctor content i believe we’ve gotten which is like, the only negative thing I can say about it

The TLDR version is this:

I literally cant believe how sweet it is? Painful, but sweet. Like. I don’t honestly know what’s more likely - did they set out to write Jamie a nice little straight love interest and just fail miserably at it by constantly likening her to the Doctor AND paralleling the Doctor’s perspective with her ex’s AND putting Jamie’s relationships with both of them in direct tension with each other while constantly letting his with the Doctor win out?

OR - did they do a very 1960s thing and say hey we’re gonna write what’s essentially a story about how much Jamie and the Doctor love each other and release it on Valentine’s Day thinly disguised as a one-off romance with a french lady?

Now, as a general rule, my attitude toward questions like that is usually “don’t know, don’t care, doesn’t matter” - and while I 100% stand by that, I also have to admit that this particular audio seems to pay enough attention to detail that I’d kind of think I was selling it short if I assumed too many of these things were just meaningless coincidences, you know?

Anyway, that’s the most coherent/overarching thought. And here’s a disorganized list of things I absolutely cannot get over about it (they don’t form any kind of argument, mind, they just all happen to live rent free in my head):

- Celine is first taken in by Jamie being an idiot (specifically him claiming not to speak French, in perfect French); likewise, her entrance in the scene where they actually kiss is marked with a little anecdote about her hat getting stuck on a doornail and her scolding it as she attempts to fix her un-tameable appearance, and the narration says Celine “would often clown for Jamie like this” - all of which, while undeniably adorable, don’t exactly strike me as entirely original traits to have been assigned to Jamie’s love-interest (but also Celine is so cool and her perspective on film/media/time is an excellent addition to the long list of dr who characters)

- When they’re in the present, describing Jamie’s relationship with Celine in 1908, they call him her “companion” and highlight his going nearly everywhere with her, which earns a laugh from the 4th doctor (and me as well, though probably for slightly different reasons - but like, is that really all it takes to have a fling with someone in 60′s era who? bc if so...)

- Celine’s ex-fiance is still in love with her and is jealously watching when she kisses Jamie ... and then the Doctor appears beside him, evidently doing the exact. same. thing. They have the following conversation:

“You know, it’s not prudent to spy on people. But then, people in pain can’t be expected to act prudently.”

“Pain, monsieur? You mistake me.”

“Ah, do I? Good, because I rather thought you’d lost something.”

“What would you know about loss monsieur?”

- I’m sorry doc but who do you think you are, saying stuff like that and smiling sadly at the floor to boot? I 100% had to pause it here the first time I listened, just to not throw my laptop across the room. 

- Then when I recovered continued, the Doctor closes the door so they can’t watch anymore and explains “Possessing things comes so terribly easily to some men that losing them can feel cruel, intolerably cruel. In my experience, only the very best of men cannot be tempted to answer that cruelty with more - I do sincerely hope that you are the best of men.” (guess who gets described as the best of men by the end of the audio?)

- Jamie and the Doctor apparently develop a habit of walking along the river in Paris in silence

- During one such walk, Jamie suggests Celine come with them since she already figured out about the Tardis - and when the Doctor’s worried by this, he says he only allowed Jamie & Celine to grow closer “because of Victoria.” Jamie takes offense at the ‘allowing it’ comment and also refuses to admit he knows what the Doctor means about Victoria, which leads the Doctor to say that he knows how fond Jamie was of her - he was too, of course, but with him, “it was different, wasn’t it?” Jamie only says maybe that’s true and maybe that’s not, but his voice catches until he changes the subject

- Jamie doesn’t see Celine for days both times that she’s recovering from the shock and depression of her work being destroyed. In contrast, when the Doctor’s not well, Jamie’s "afraid” and “guilty” and hardly seems to leave his side at all, if his being there “rushing to embrace him” the second he wakes up - after a period Jamie describes as “at least a week” - is anything to go by, anyway. so either bf writers need to learn how to write a committed straight relationship or admit that’s not what they ever intended in the first place

- Oh yeah, and the Doctor spends that week "asleep” in Jamie’s bedroom - no, there’s no explanation as to if that’s where he was when he first collapsed or if it’s where Jamie decided to take him bc why would they feel the need to explain him being there? why was it even relevant to tell us it was Jamie’s room in the first place?

- The Doctor somehow manages to control the Tardis enough to take Celine on one trip to an alien planet and then return to the correct time & place for her to use the footage she recorded there in her new film - and while the audio doesn’t do very much to explain how that was possible, it does treat this as A Pretty Big Deal, and immediately afterward the Doctor has to spend a week communing with his past self (and/or the Tardis?) debating how likely it is that the Time Lords could use this to trace him. When he decides it’s not worth the risk and they have to stop the film from ever being shown to the public, Jamie asks why he agreed to it in the first place, and all he can say is “Because, Jamie, you asked me to!” earning awkward stares from the crowd.

- Oh, but, lest we forget, that little outburst is also immediately followed by him putting his arm around Jamie’s shoulders, and, shockingly, apparently beginning to actually explain the truth about the danger from the Time Lords - until they’re interrupted, of course idk why exactly but the idea of a 60s dr wanting to come clean with a companion but not being allowed to bc the show demands the war games be something of a reveal hurts me in a very good way

- The mental image of “the Doctor and Jamie, resplendent in borrowed evening wear”

- The audio admitting that Jamie’s not very good at subterfuge, and the Doctor asking if he’s going to be alright with them having to steal the film back from Celine - and Jamie’s little “Aye, Doctor” as he feels a ‘glass arrow piercing his chest’ glad to see bf is reading all my letters about exactly how i feel any time something sad happens to james robert mccrimmon

- The Doctor’s anxious to get out of there for obvious reasons, but he hangs around bc Jamie wants to see Celine again - which doesn’t happen, because of her aforementioned shock & depression, but she does leave Jamie a note that ends “you and that Doctor of yours - look after him Jamie, he loves you dearly, as do I.” yeah, if you didn’t want people to draw a parallel there, you could’ve picked, like, any other wording in the world.

- In case you weren’t fully convinced I’ve been reading too much into this whole audio already, consider this: Celine dies in Long Island in 1968, three days before her birthday - 1968 is when this story would’ve taken place in the show’s history (between Fury & Wheel), and dying three days before/after a birthday in America seems a bit... well I had some deja vu from it, anyway

- Four of all people being the one to bring back the film - I know he does it bc Sarah Jane makes him, but personally, I often feel like despite the length of his run, 4 is the Doctor with which we might’ve gotten the fewest glimpses into his interiority, so the fact that it’s him and not one of the more overtly sentimental Doctors makes it feel like it carries even more weight somehow, to me anyway. I think I wrote a post saying roughly the same thing about 4 & Fate of Krelos/Return to Telos but maybe I only did that inside my own head lol. Still, I’m all for any opportunities for Jamie to be one of the few characters to draw some noticeable emotion out of Four, but in fairness I haven’t touched too much of his EU stuff to really be able to compare the frequency with which this happens with other past companions

- Is Four referring to Two or Jamie when he says he got the film from “an old family friend”? Two did the actual stealing, but he probably means Jamie’s involvement - either way, it’s an interesting way of describing old companions - or selves?

- When Jemima goes to call Jamie a thief, Four is “roused” to defend him: “he really was the very best of men” again, any time four freely shows he cares about someone, im over the moon about it

- Oh ha ha, there’s an audio called “Deleted Scenes” featuring the Doctor who’s most affected by junked episodes. And at the end of it, a character who’s spent her life researching and lecturing about a lost film gets to watch it be ‘rediscovered’ after it’s gone unseen for decades. I feel marginally less stupid for reading into the other details of a story like this when it ends up deciding to be to be clever & slightly meta like that

But yeah

all in all, it’s kind of amazing to me that this genuinely reads like they sat down and said okay boys it’s valentines day, let’s write an audio where jamie kisses a girl, since that hasn’t happened except as a plot device in one story in 1967 - but then when they got down to business they accidentally(?) wrote a story all about how important his bond with the Doctor is and how easily that can be compared to a legitimate love interest (even if the love interest in question is a one off character & the extent of the relationship appears to be like one kiss & then having Jamie spend most of his time around the Doctor instead)

I realize there’s something slightly illogical about writing the words “shipping aside” after a post like this but seriously - no matter how many categories you’re able to see two & jamie’s relationship fitting into, this is 40 minutes of big finish just hitting you over the head with how powerful/special/important that relationship is, and with them being two of my favorite characters, i really haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since

[thesnowinthemountains]

NCT 127’s First Time Saying I Love You

(a/n:  1. i wrote a good half of these drunk, so apologies for the excessive fluff 2. i didnt know i was whipped for mark until i wrote that okay im sorry 3. i nearly threw my laptop out the window trying to post this please love it)

Taeil

You were sitting across from each other at the small dinner table in your apartment’s kitchen - the only one you could afford for the time being. There was barely enough space for two plates and glasses, but neither of you seemed to mind the proximity, and Taeil kept staring at you, which distracted you anyway. “What is it?” You asked for the millionth time. “Nothing, nothing,” he replied calmly, going back to his food, but just pushing it around his plate. Not a minute passed before he did it again. You swallowed a bite of food, sighed, and calmly put your fork down. “Taeil, what?” You asked, sharper this time. He smiled to himself and took a second before looking at you. “Your eyes are a really nice color.” He said, failing to hide a mocking smile. You frowned. “Why are you laughing?” You were just confused at this point. “I don’t know how to do this, just-” he breathed, gathering himself. “I love you.” Now you blushed, looking down. “I love you too,” you mumbled. 

Johnny

You came home from a long day of work, swearing to yourself you were going to quit. You needed to, your current job was starting to get to your head and affect your moods. You slammed the door on your way in, tossed your bag aside and launched yourself into the couch. You let out a long groan and a few seconds later, Johnny’s voice came from the hallway. “Long day?” he laughed, settling himself in the space next to you so you could lay your head in his lap. “God, you have no idea,” you sighed. You sat together quietly for a while, him playing with your hair until you were almost asleep in his lap. He let out a pensive hum. “What?” You murmured, eyes closed.   “I love you,” he said simply, like it was a fact he just read online.  “You just made my day,” you laughed softly.

Taeyong

You couldn’t remember what you had said, but he had smiled, his eyes bright, and you just knew. It was easy. He was so easy to fall in love with, easy to be around, your whole relationship was easy and fun. You were in a perfect space. He got excited about ducklings, and made little noises to himself when he cooked. He cooked. He liked big sweaters, and you liked borrowing them; they smelled like him. You liked to sleep in his bed, too, liked waking up surrounded with everything that was him and about him. It was a little while later and you couldn’t hold it in any longer, afraid your heart might just burst if you did.  “I love you,” you said it heavily, like it had been weighing on you and just the mere action of putting it out into the world would heal you of all your ailments.  “I love you too,” he smiled over the pot on the stove in front of him. You revelled in the domesticity of it, ready to pause this moment and never let it go.

Yuta

You and Yuta had met through mutual friends, ones he played soccer with, and ones you were in various classes with. You were at a study group with them one evening, going over notes from the past week’s classes, trying to gather information for an upcoming midterm essay you were dreading. One of their phones rang. “Hey, Yuta, what’s up?” You didn’t want to eavesdrop on the conversation, but your ears perked up on their own. “Study group. Yeah, she’s here, you wanna talk to her?” Your friend now looked at you from across the desk. He handed you his phone, but mumbled a quick: “Keep it short.” “Hey,” you spoke into the phone after pulling your tongue at your friend. “Hey, I was just thinking about you.” You heard the smile in Yuta’s voice. You smiled in return. “Oh?” “Yeah, I was just thinking I love you. You know, if you’re, uh... into that.” You could hear him shuffling with something on his end, and he was not a nervous person, but you could tell he was trying hard to be casual. “I see,” you decided to toy with him. “Well, then.” “Well, what?” The shuffling stopped. You hummed loudly, like you were thinking something over. He sighed. “Fine, fine, I love you too,” you smiled down at your notes before your friend snatched his phone back from your hand. “That’s enough of that,” he spoke into the phone, but looked at you, addressing you both. You pouted at him but a smile quickly crept back on your face.

Doyoung

This was to be the dinner during which you would introduce Doyoung to some friends of yours to test the waters, see how he would get along, see if they liked him. It was a work dinner, relatively casual, where some of your favorite coworkers were joking among themselves, and poking fun at other people around the table. You were in the younger ones, the newer hires, so you, Doyoung, and a handful of work friends sat at the farthest edge of the table. Doyoung was chatting away with a girl he didn’t seem to realize was in fact a close friend of yours. He looked away for a moment and she flashed you a thumbs up, and an impressed look. You smiled to yourself, happy to have the stamp of approval. “What’s so funny?” Doyoung focused all his attention on you now. You laughed to yourself quietly before meeting his eyes. “I love you,” you cocked your head. He blushed, but grabbed your hand under the table. “I love you too,” he kissed the side of your head, going back to his conversation. There was no helping your lovestruck smile, and a friend of yours across the table made fun of you for it, but you couldn’t be bothered to care.

Jaehyun

You were getting ready for bed, brushing your teeth, washing your face, doing all the final things of the day, when Jaehyun leaned into the bathroom’s door frame. He was just watching you, and when you eventually looked back at him, he looked down. You went back to what you were doing, and he walked up behind you, moving your hair out of the way to kiss your neck. “What’s up?” You giggled. “I love you,” he mumbled against your neck before looking at you through the mirror again. Eyes wide, you turned to face him. He looked down at you, not saying anything. “Well, I love you too, then.” You laughed, pulling him into a kiss.

Winwin

It was late, you knew it, but you and Winwin were huddled together under a big cozy blanket on the couch watching episode after episode of your current favorite show. You had noticed him dozing off time and again, waking himself up with a start each time. You didn’t want to disrupt him, but there was an important scene involving his favorite character, so you lightly shook him awake, his head coming up from your chest and his eyes opening slowly. He looked somehow like both a puppy and an angel and you couldn’t believe you got to see him in moments like these. At that point, you had forgotten why you had woken him up in the first place, and the television was just background noise. “I love you,” you breathed, and your heartbeat sped up almost instantly. He smiled a small, happy smile. “I love you too,” he whispered, laying his head back on your chest, eyes closed.

Jungwoo

You were taking a walk around the neighbourhood. It was a perfect day, the sun shining but just enough of a chill to entice you to wear your favorite sweater. He was commenting on the surroundings, making silly jokes and getting giggles out of you. In the midst of his narration of your environment - the houses and cars and the little lives of the little people in all of them, their fun names and jobs and hobbies - he cut himself off. “I love you,” he said hurriedly before going back to his antics. “What?” You laughed. “What?” He looked at you innocently. “Oh, what, the “I love you”? Yeah.” He shrugged. “Is that a big surprise?” “No, I guess not,” you acquiesced, “I love you too, though.” You elbowed him playfully.  “Well, good, I hope so! You’d better!” He exclaimed, then smiled to himself.

Mark

You had found that loving Mark came in stages. First, you picked up little habits he had - none too specific, but you took notice and would smile to yourself. Then, you would go out of your way to make him laugh, because the sun shone in his eyes when he did. It went on like this until you finally admitted to yourself that you were in love with him, this cute dorky guy with the weird ears and sweet smile. You never said anything, and you figured if you ever did, things would get awkward and eventually your friendship might phase out, which was worse than pretending you felt nothing at all. One night, though, the two of you were in the middle of playing video games when you made a joke that had him doubled over in laughter. “Fuck, I love you!” He exclaimed through his laughter before getting very serious very fast. “Oh, I- I mean the- the- I- uh...” he stammered on like this until he noticed the look on your face. “What?” He eventually asked, startled by his own words and your wide eyes.  “I wouldn’t be mad if you did,” you said quietly, in what was probably the most serious tone you’d ever used around him. “Love me, I mean.” He stared at you, giggled, and got this big, stupid grin on his face. You thanked all your lucky stars and every light in the universe for allowing him into existence, into your life, and allowing him to feel for you as you did for him. 

Haechan

You had gone to laser tag with friends, and you had made him swear he wouldn’t somehow cheat, or eliminate you in some snide way. Ultimately, you knew perfectly well that he was the sort of boy who played dirty or not at all, so when he snuck up behind you and you heard the loud sounds of your elimination, you were mildly annoyed, but not surprised. You turned to stare at him, mouth open in mock offense. “Haechan!” You cried. “It’s the game, don’t blame the player,” he held his hands up innocently. You fumed, sticking your tongue in your cheek to stop from snapping back. You moved to catch him and he ran away. “I love you?” he called back, his laughter echoing, while you sighed and returned to your team’s home base. 

[chaseatinydream]

pirate king (extra) || atz

A hand reaches into the frame to press the recording button.

The camera shifts around as the hand moves to adjust it on its tripod, fixing the device in place. When the image finally clears, stills and focuses, the hand moves back to reveal a man with blonde hair done in a mullet.

“Is it done yet?” A voice pipes up in the background.

The man adjusting the camera steps back to reveal a well lit room with wooden floorboards, the words KQ Entertainment behind him in big, white letters. Seven men hover at the back, all trying to push their way into the centre to see the camera.

“It’s on!” The man with the mullet cheers a little at his success. All eight of them rush to form a line, before he announces the beginning of the VLIVE. “하나, 둘, 셋 (hana, dool, seht)!”

“Eight Makes One Team!” They chorus together and bow, wide grins on their faces. “안녕하세요 (annyeonghaseyo)! It’s ATEEZ!”

They burst into a round of scattered applause.

“Hello everyone! It’s Hongjoong here!” The man with the mullet waves at the camera, smiling broadly. “So, due to popular opinion on Tumblr-”

“We’ve decided to check out @chasingatinydream’s fanfiction of us, Pirate King!” The young man with purple hair bursts into the frame, grinning wildly. “We’ve made a reaction video to some of the earlier chapters, which will be uploaded soon! We hope you watch it!”

[atinypiratequeen commented: There is nothing I want more in this life]

“But this video will be about us recreating the legendary post, which made more than half of the readers following Pirate King to curse the author online, Chapter 22, Gunshot! We haven’t read it yet, but we’ll be having one of us narrate as the story goes through!” Hongjoong continues, and everyone cheers, clapping again. “So now, we’ll be introducing the cast!”

“Hi! It’s Mingi here, main rapper and lead dancer of ATEEZ! I’m going to be the narrator for today!” The tall man waves, holding a script book in hand. His hair is wet, as if he’s just come out of the shower.

[imasexybuffalo commented: omg mingi looks so good]

“Hi, I’m Yeosang, playing myself.” The visual king himself waves, gracing all those who watching with with his presence.

[VLIVE Heart Count has increased by 2k]

[gothyeosanggf commented: im ded some1 save me]

[sassy-kpop-glitter commented: His birthmark is so pretty I wish they wouldn’t cover it! Also this chapter was so sad, this video is probably going to make me cry all over again.]

“Wooyoung here! I’m in charge of the sexy performance of this group and I’m playing Chin Hae, the main character!” Wooyoung waves with a big smile, other hand running through his hair. Hundreds of fangirls’ hearts swell all over the globe at the group’s most epic bias wrecker. “Also the one no one knows shit about!”

[@chasingatinydream commented: I was not expecting this portrayal of my MC but sure go for it Wooyoung]

“I’m Hongjoong, acting as Captain of the Treasure!” Mullet man beams at the camera, inclining his head a little in greeting. Then he glances back at the group. “Wasn’t I supposed to be blind in one eye? Where’s my eyepatch? And my red jacket?”

[@princejoongie1997 commented: I love you Hongjoongie <3]

“Here! Your jacket’s still in the wash because you performed with it yesterday, so the staff said to use this instead.” The man with green hair tosses a small black shape and a red blanket to his leader, before stepping into the camera with a cute smile. “Hello everyone, I missed you all! I’m ATEEZ’s San, director and also in charge of special effects and props!”

[@baeksofty commented: someone save me help help helpppp]

[@chasingatinydream commented: San is directing this wth is going to happen to my story]

“Hi.” Seonghwa smiles sweetly from a chair at the side. He raises the selfie stick he’s holding, waving it a little so everyone can see. “I’m Seonghwa, the oldest, and I’ll be the cameraman for this video!”

[@catmosphericlight commented: is it possible to love one man so much? I feel like its impossible]

[@berrylip commented: my finger hurts from smashing that heart button but i’ll do it for you seonghwa]

“Hi, everyone. It’s ATEEZ’s maknae, Jongho.” The youngest member waves his hand, smiling a little as he watches what’s happening right next to Seonghwa. “I’m going to be the extra who fills in any role needed.”

Hongjoong claps his hands once and everyone falls silent for dramatic effect. Jongho reaches behind the couch to pull someone out from hiding, pushing him right in front of the camera. The tall, lanky man shows itself to be Yunho, trying to crawl back behind the couch.

“And finally, our villain! We present to you, Yunho, AKA Leon Bastiville!”

[@someonerandom commented: LEON BASTARDVILLE!!!]

“You’re already getting hate, Yunho.” San comments as he peers at the comments flooding in from the readers. “Who is this Leon guy anyway?”

“I didn’t want to be a villain! Why did my luck run out on me when I needed it the most?” Yunho wails, attempting to hide from sight. Jongho simply grabs him by the ankle and hauls him back to the front, Yunho’s fingers scrabbling along the floor, before he finally locks his arms around Wooyoung’s leg.

[@mireu01 commented: Yunho as a villain i can’t im wheezing-]

“Sorry, we drew lots for this role.” Seonghwa explains over the noise of Yunho trying to escape from Jongho’s iron grip and Wooyoung attempting to pry Yunho’s hands from his calf as he takes the camera from the tripod, attaching it to the stick. It isn’t working. “Yunho picked the lot for the villain.”

“Alright, I’ll begin reading!” Mingi announces, lifting the script to his face. He starts to read, in the most dramatic tone he can. “Chapter Twenty Two, Gunshot, Original Version. Warnings, whipping, some gore- What? I feel like I shouldn’t be reading this on a VLIVE-”

“It’s a zero budget production, we’ll be fine!” San shouts as he gestures from the sidelines for Mingi to continue. The rapper pauses a little hesitantly, before starting to read once more.

“You freeze. Every muscle in your body goes taut, a cold shiver runs down your spine. The arm around your waist is firm, strong and from the almost unbreakable grip he has on you, he doesn’t intend on letting you go any soon.”

“Wooyoung-ah, Yunho-ah.” San studies the script in his hand intently, before pointing at the taller man, who is still prone on the ground with an arm wrapped around Wooyoung’s leg. “You need to get into position, you know.”

There’s a pause, and the two turn to stare at each other in horror. “What?”

“You heard me.” San waves the script impatiently, pulling a Nerf gun from a small box of props the staff must have given him for this video and tossing it at Yunho, who barely manages to catch the bright yellow toy. “Yunho, stand behind Wooyoung and pretend to choke him.”

Neither of them move, still staring at each other.

[@alyj12 commented: Oh my god just do it please!!!]

“The fans demand it.” Seonghwa’s amused voice can be heard as the camera pans in on Hongjoong’s grin at the sidelines, next to San and Jongho. The maknae is snickering uncontrollably, hand over his mouth.

“You need to do it!” Hongjoong calls. He’s donned the black eye patch already and has the red blanket pulled around his shoulders, the thick fabric so long that it almost completely engulfs him with his head popping out of the very top.

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 10k]

[@itslizzeh commented: hongjoons such a cute smol bean save me]

[@chasingatinydream commented: why does hongjoong in that blanket remind me of a pimple]

Grudgingly and with no grace at all, Yunho moves behind Wooyoung, grabbing him by the neck and holding the toy gun to his head. The purple haired man makes several gagging sounds and Yunho’s face is one of utter disgust.

“Very good!” San praises as he glances down at the script again. “Now, Yunho, put your mouth at Wooyoungie’s ear.”

“What?” The two of them shout again, Wooyoung struggling to get out of Yunho’s arms while he still can. Yunho’s face is one of nausea as he scrunches up his nose.

“That’s gross, Wooyoung hasn’t showered since dance practice half an hour ago!”

[@atinypiratequeen commented: the two of them literally got the worst roles lmao]

“Do it, do it, do it!” Jongho and Yeosang are chanting in the corner, the maknae not even bothering to hide his laughter now. Yunho slowly puts his face near Wooyoung’s ear and Wooyoung gags.

“I can feel your breath at my ear! It’s weird!”

“It’s weird for me too, damnit!”

“Stop cursing! Now, Yunho, whisper in Wooyoung’s ear ‘I’ve been waiting for you for a long time.’ ”

“I hate this Leon guy, whoever he is!” Yunho yelps as the camera shakes from Seonghwa’s laughter. “Why is he so weird, going around whispering in people’s ears?”

“I don’t know! Someone save me! This main character’s life sucks!” Wooyoung flails around in Yunho’s grip. The tall dancer makes several loud retching noises, but has probably guessed that he won’t be getting out of this anytime soon. He simply closes his eyes for a moment, channeling his inner actor from that video shoot with Dingo, and leans next to Wooyoung’s ear, whispering softly.

“I’ve been waiting for you for a long time.”

Wooyoung screeches like a dying cat. “No!”

[@mireu01 commented: someone get this boy an acting role]

“Very good!” San praises, clapping as he turns to Mingi. The rapper continues reading.

“Your heart sinks in your chest as the rest of your crew come into sight. Most of them are tied up in groups with rope, their heads hanging low as Navy soldiers kick and push them out of the cargo hold, where they had been hidden from sight. So that was why the ship had been so strangely silent when you and Wooyoung had returned to the Treasure. They had been captured- Holy shit, that was what happened to us in chapter twenty one?”

“I don’t know, I was saving myself, I mean the main character, from getting shot from a musket bullet!” Wooyoung wails, thrashing around. “Get me out of here! I regret ever drawing this lot! Who wants to be the main character when she has such a terrible life?”

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 17k]

“The fans love it!” Seonghwa remarks excitedly, the recording steadying for a moment as he shifts the camera to San, who bows dramatically. Wooyoung shrieks at everyone watching his torment live.

“Yunho, tell Wooyoung ‘Hello, hello, hello, my two dear pirates. Now, we’re finally all here together. I’ve been waiting for this the whole night.’ ”

“That stalker was waiting in wait for us? That’s so creepy.” Jongho comments with a shudder. Yeosang shrugs. He can’t fathom the mind of a lunatic either.

“There’s poison in his voice, sweet as honey and as dangerous as snake venom. You don’t dare to struggle against him for fear of being shot point blank in the head, but his hold on you is making you panic and he’s crushing your windpipe, making every breath an arduous effort.” Mingi reads aloud, and Yunho, getting a little too into character, squeezes Wooyoung’s neck tighter. The shorter dancer yelps, flailing around.

“You’re choking me!”

“Very good, Yunho!” San applauds, completely ignoring Wooyoung’s plight. Yunho grins, nodding at the camera.

“Hey, I’m pretty good at acting!”

[@alyj12 commented: someone save wooyoung he looks like he’s going to die]

“Wooyoung’s fine!” Seonghwa beams, zooming in on Wooyoung’s struggling to free himself.

“You’re killing me!”

“Wow, Wooyoung’s really getting into character. Good job, Wooyoung!” Hongjoong raises a thumbs up with a proud smile on his face.

“I’m not in character-”

“ ‘While the two of you were off causing your little commotion back there at the official’s building,’ the officer drawls, playfully resting his chin on your shoulder as he addresses the crew, ‘one of my men ran back to the harbor to report it to me. My colleague that saw to you yesterday, Yoongi, was already suspicious of you. He smelled gunpowder on your ship, but your little de facto captain told us that you hadn’t been fired on.’ ”

“Are you serious? He smelled us out?” Jongho looks unimpressed by this, scowling. “Who the heck goes around just smelling ships?”

“Bring him out.” Yunho snarls, pressing the toy gun tighter against Wooyoung’s head. His finger must have slipped on the trigger, because there’s a pop sound and Wooyoung yelps, a foam dart falling to the ground.

“That hurt!”

“No, Yunho, he’s not supposed to die yet.” San corrects, shaking his head and completely ignoring Wooyoung. Yunho pouts, breaking character for a moment.

“Sorry.”

“Anyway, Hongjoongie-hyung, it’s your moment to shine!” San announces, turning to his leader. Hongjoong tries to make his way over, but then he steps on the hem of his red blanket and trips, sprawling on the ground in front of the camera. “Oh, that was very good acting, hyung!”

“That wasn’t acting-”

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 49k]

Mingi glances across the script. “Leon clicks his tongue and you see your captain shoved forward, head bowed and hands bound in front of him. Part of you desperately wants to run to the man who named you, to insist he never incline his head to someone he doesn’t respect, but you are completely powerless now. He looks so small- Doesn’t hyung always look small? What’s the difference?”

“Yah, Mingi!” Hongjoong shouts as he attempts to get up, but trips and falls again. Jongho is snorting uncontrollably, hand reaching for a cup of popcorn that definitely wasn’t there earlier and Yeosang’s face is buried in a pillow as his body shakes with laughter.

“Bring me the cat.” Yunho snaps, getting into the mood once more, and San glances around for his extra.

[@teajuns commenting: yunho really getting into it kshdksj]

“Jongho, you’re going to be the guy that whips Hongjoong-hyung.”

Jongho couldn’t look happier, jumping to his feet at the words, his eyes shining.

“Really?”

Hongjoong’s eyes widen almost comically in horror and he desperately scrambles back. “He’s going to break my back!”

“We don’t have a whip, but we do have a squeaky hammer!” San grins, pulling out the plastic mallet from the box. He tosses it to Jongho, who catches it and eyes it with a vindictive smile Hongjoong’s honestly quite terrified of.

“Don’t worry, hyung. I promise I’ll be gentle.” Jongho looks more terrifying than that Leon guy could ever be. Striding over, he rips the red blanket from Hongjoong, leaving the poor leader on the ground. He raises the squeaky mallet.

The sight is menacing.

“I’m not doing this!” Hongjoong shrieks, running for his life around the dance studio, Jongho chasing after him. Seonghwa documents the whole thing, spinning round and round in circles before he finally retreats the the floor.

“Sorry everyone, I got too dizzy.” He apologises with a laugh.

“Let me go!” The leader screams as Jongho catches him by the legs, sending both of them sprawling to the ground.

“Tell me who broke my guitar string!”

“Never!”

The maknae raises the hammer and mercilessly thwacks his hyung with it, the rubber hammer going squeak squeak squeak.

“Fine, fine, fine! I broke it while trying to play Havana, okay? God, please just stop hitting me! I surrender!”

There’s a final, hard smack and the hammer goes flying out of Jongho’s hands, hitting Wooyoung straight in the face.

[@roamingthesails commented: i can’t stop laughing this is so stupid]

Squeak!

“Ow! I’m not even a part of your scene, Jongho!”

“Hongjoong’s back is a mutilated, bloody mess of raw flesh and shredded skin, crimson streaming from several open wounds. Your captain is on his knees, face pressed against the floor, body trembling.” Mingi baulks a little at the intense description. “You can’t even begin to imagine what absolute agony he must be in, your musket wound was nothing compared to this. But your captain remains silent, teeth gritted against the torment brought on with each swing of the whip. Honestly, you’re so cool in this story, hyung. The last time you got a paper cut you nearly cried and went to Seonghwa-hyung to get a plaster-”

“I didn’t!” Hongjoong groans from the floor, attempting to massage his back. Jongho climbs off him with a triumph grin, settling next to Yeosang.

“Now act like you’re strong and laugh at Yunho, Hongjoong-hyung.” San directs his leader, but the lead rapper simply remains prone on the ground.

“I’m dead, I’m dead…” He moans, lying on the floor like a dead fish. “Just let me die…”

San squirts a bottle of red liquid on his back and Hongjoong screams, leaping off the floor in fright. The back of his shirt looks like a bloody mess. “San, what was that?”

“Ketchup.” The brand is blurred out, but it’s ketchup, alright. “It’s supposed to be your blood.”

“I showered before this…” Hongjoong whines, staring mournfully at his shirt. San ignores him and moves to check his script once more.

[@faith032101 commented: Does this make Hongjoong a snack?]

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 105k]

“Act evil and tell Hongjoong you’re going to whip Wooyoung too.” He instructs, and Yunho turns to Hongjoong with an evil grin that looks way too into character.

“Let me go!” Wooyoung tries to slip out of Yunho’s arms, but fails spectacularly once again. “I don’t want to get beaten up by Jongho! How is this kind of thing even allowed to be aired-”

“I wonder if your tongue will loosen if I do it to one of your crew, then?”

“I don’t want to die!”

“Now rip Wooyoung’s shirt, Yunho.” San instructs, studying the script. Wooyoung shrieks, doubling his efforts to become Houdini.

“This shirt cost me eighty two thousand won! Don’t do this to meeeee-”

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 579k]

[@addictmaniac commented: TAKE ONE FOR THE ATINY TEAM AND DO IT YUNHO]

Mingi adds on grimly. “Uncaring of the gun at your head, you flail and thrash against him, to no avail.”

“This shirt was expensive-”

With that, Wooyoung finally breaks free of Yunho’s grip, but the momentum brought on by his little escape sends him stumbling and he trips over Hongjoong’s blanket, before sprawling on top of his leader.

“Ow!”

“Wooyoung, you little-”

“Oh my god Hongjoong’s finally found out Chin Hae is a woman!” Mingi gasps in shock, a hand coming over his mouth. Yeosang gapes in shock.

“Oh no! What’s going to happen? Wooyoung’s going to hate her and they’re never going to be together-”

“Eh, I more of shipped her with captain anyway.” Jongho drawls.

“And he looks so betrayed! Hongjoong, don’t be sad! I promise Chin Hae didn’t want to lie to you-”

“I knew it from the beginning…” Hongjoong groans from under Wooyoung. Mingi ignores him.

“Not you, the cooler Hongjoong in the book.”

“She’s coming back with us. I hope you’re pure for sale, my sweet, but I suppose that may be difficult when you’re on the same ship as so many men- I sound like a pervert, I’m not saying this.” Yunho shakes his head, tossing the script away. It smacks into the camera.

“Ah!” Seonghwa rushes to save it. “Yunho!”

“Hongjoong-hyung, you’re supposed to shout Wooyoung’s name and we get a smoke bomb-”

“But I’m the main character!” Wooyoung protests as he heaves himself off his leader. The front of his shirt is sticky with ketchup, as if he’s the victim of a homicide case.

San pauses to think for a moment. “That’s true. We’ll just move on then. Jongho, smoke bomb please!”

Jongho picks up the cup of popcorn and throws it into the air. It goes absolutely everywhere.

“Great work, Jongho!”

“He flies out of nowhere, lunging for your captor. Leon snarls and tries to kick him away, but then he raises a short knife and buries it in Leon’s arm. The man holding you stumbles back onto the gangplank, falling onto the ground and your saviour takes your hand.” Mingi reads aloud, eyes wide. Then his mouth falls open. “Yeosang, you’re going to-”

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 1.7M]

“Yeosang the knight in shining armour to the rescue!” Jongho pulls three kazoos from his pockets and blows wildly. The screeching noise almost breaks a few thousand eardrums around the world.

Yeosang stands up, picking his way through the ketchupy, popcorn mess that is the room. He takes Wooyoung’s hand awkwardly.

“Like this?”

“Great! Yunho, pick up the party popper there and shoot Yeosang with it!” San cheers, almost grinning madly. Yeosang’s eyes widen in horror.

“Wait, what-”

Boom!

[@pinkrosesandblackthorns commented: YEOSANG IS DEAD ARGHHHH]

[@sassy-kpop-glitter commented: NO! NO! YEOSANG NEEDS TO LIVE AND BE HAPPY! DON’T BE SO CRUEL YUNHO]

[@ateez-8-makes-1-team commented: HOW COULD YOU DO THIS YUNHO]

“I didn’t do it on purpose!” Yunho yelps, dropping the confetti gun.

Yeosang slumps to the ground, groaning. “That hurt…”

“Join the club.” Hongjoong mutters, a few inches next to him and completely spent.

“Wooyoung, go and shake his body and cry.” San whirls around dramatically, tossing his script into the air.

Wooyoung finally decides to try his hand at acting and sinks to his knees next to Yeosang. San shakes another red bottle on the two of them. “NAORIIIII!”

“No, that movie is Goblin, Wooyoung-”

“What is this ketchup? It’s burning my skin!” Wooyoung shrieks and San double checks the bottle, face turning a little pale.

“Oh. It was chilli.”

There’s a moment of silence as Yeosang and Wooyoung both stare at each other. Then they’re bolting for the door in horror, dashing from the dance studio while tripping over their own feet.

San follows, calling after them.

“Need any help, guys?”

“I’m a terrible person. I’m a terrible cruel, cold hearted man who just killed Yeosang with a confetti gun.” Yunho is mumbling to himself. Mingi pats him on the back, pushing him out of the door as well.

“Maybe you should get some rest, hyung. I hear the author has some pretty nasty stuff planned for you after the Sea Witch arc…”

[@chasingatinydream commented: STOP SPOILING THE STORY MINGI]

The two vanish out of the door.

“I’m going to take a shower and see a doctor.” Hongjoong groans, dragging himself after them. The door clicks shut behind him.

The camera turns around to fit Seonghwa’s unruffled face into the frame.

“Well, that was Pirate King, chapter 22, gunshot. Roll credits.” He shows the floor, the scene of a massacre with popcorn scattered everywhere. “I suppose this is just a good opportunity for cleaning up, hmm?”

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 3.6M]

The next thirty minutes of the VLIVE are of Seonghwa’s Cleaning ASMR.

[whatsmylaneagain]

Amethyst - Third Chapter

Pairing: Eggsy x Agent!Reader

Word count: 1960 (a big one!!! Yay!!!)

Warnings: swearing, Roxy mention (bc she deserved more), reader’s character being a rebellious lil shit, Eggsy being kinda dumb (oh well this is all kinda narrated by his point of view, there’s no way to not expect that, right?!)

Chapter synopsis: so, we know that the bomb had Eggsy’s name on it, but.... what the hell is actually happening?

A/N: GUYS IM BACK AND IM SORRY!!!! I’ve written (and revised) this more than six months ago, but I absolutely hated how I made Eggsy a dumb character, so I spent all this months putting this story aside to fix it later... but I love it so much and this week I watched Spies are Forever and oh well.... idk, its been too long, but I’m posting this anyway.

Amethyst masterlist

Eggsy didn’t expect to find another person other than Harry and Merlin at the Kingsman’s meeting room. And what he definitely didn’t expect was for the person to be a beautiful Chinese woman laughing and having a drink with Harry Hart. The young man felt like he was invading a private moment, and had the sudden urge to grab y/n by the arm to show her the new victorian-style sconces he chosen for the rebuilt hallway.

But before he could say anything, y/n had already tapped the doorpost, making their presence known. The middle-aged woman talking to Harry glanced at the two young agents, giving the girl a sly smile. 

“I’m glad to know you didn’t punch Mr. Unwin on your way here, y/n” she said, as Eggsy went straight for his chair on Harry’s right side.

“I would’ve if you didn’t send me that text” The girl had moved to the woman’s side, backing up to the wall for support. She never made mention of pulling a chair.

“Well, y/n, I take as you already know Harry.” Said the woman, gesturing to the older man, who smiled sweetly. Yes, that’s right. Harry SMILED.

“Of course, The Great Harry Hart, the man of a thousand missions;” when Eggsy thought he couldn’t get more confused, y/n pulled this. “Everybody at the headquarters knows who you are.” And some - fucking – how, she sounded genuine, and not witty or arrogant as she appeared to be. Was that… admiration?

Seeing Eggsy’s confused expression, the older woman gave him a small smile, welcoming, but not too sweet; just like an agent is used to do.

“Galahad, I’m Yijun, or as my agents – or people who can’t bother to learn how to pronounce it - call me, Circe. I’m the head of Amethyst, the agency that y/n works for.”

Eggsy must have looked very confused, because Harry intervened, while pouring two more drinks, giving him one and sliding the other across the table, towards y/n.

“Yijun is an old friend, we met some weeks after she came from China. I was already a Kingsman, and was trying to bring her into the organization – just like I did with you – when she was recruited as an Amethyst trainee.”

“You knew?” Started Eggsy, a little bit of irritation shaping his words. After agent Whiskey, he knew better than not to trust Harry. But he couldn’t help the feeling of being a pawn. “Why did you let me go after her then?”

“I didn’t know the agent who saved you was y/n. All I knew was that she was an Amethyst, since the intervention was fast and clean.”

“-almost clean;” Yijun turned her chair to y/n, who was taking a sip out of her drink, still leant against the wall. “If Morgan’s work were perfect, you wouldn’t be able to find her.”

“Nobody’s perfect, but I try my best.” She shrugged. “’m still your best agent tho.”

“Please,” Merlin entered the room, an IPad in hands, ready to the briefing. “put the blame on me for being able to hack into almost anything, including London’s surveillance cameras. She did a wonderful job.”

Merlin stopped right in front of y/n, extending his hand for a handshake. She grabbed it immediately.

“Miss Le Fay. Hope our codenames won’t be a problem.” 

“I don’t see why, Sir Merlin. The witch from who I borrowed my name could very easily have been Merlin’s apprentice.”

No awkward pressure thing, from what Eggsy could see. Why were his interactions with her so bloody awful? For god’s sake, y/n was joking with Merlin!

It took him a moment to remember what history the two were referring to: Morgan Le Fay was a witch in King Arthur’s story, from where Kingsman got their codenames. Depending on the version, she can be portrayed as Merlin’s enemy, responsible for the death of King Arthur or as a powerful good woman, that had healing powers and could shape shift. For an organization like Amethyst, Eggsy supposed the second option was the one they had in mind.

Merlin greeted Yijun with a respectful “ma’am” before selecting something on his device, the projection of a document showing up on the wall above y/n.

“The techs over Amethyst sent us their reports on missing people, and turns out the man who you two,” Merlin looked at Eggsy and y/n. “saw is Adrian Bell. Seven months ago, he apparently went on a trip to India, but his family didn’t hear about him after he left. He never showed up on the airport camera footage.”

“So... he planned to disappear?” Interfered Eggsy.

“Apparently, yes. But there’s a problem.” Merlin changed the projection, it now being a series of pictures, especially ones where Bell hugged his family tightly, his wife crying, and his kids glued to his leg. It looked like a reunion. “He doesn’t remember anything and woke up asking for his family. His last memory was being in a bar and passing out. He thinks that he was in an alcoholic coma.”

Eggsy was about to ask a lot of questions, but Merlin had started talking again, while taking two Kingsman’s RayBans out of his pocket, giving each woman a pair. 

“I’ve made a partnership with the group of cooperative organizations led by Amethyst, also called D.E.A.R; Diamond, Emerald and Amethyst Relations -” Introduced Merlin, but Eggsy wasn’t really paying much attention to him. 

Instead, he was observing y/n, who hesitantly spun the glasses in her hands, analysing it, differently from Yijun, who just put them on right away. Her mouth twitched on the side, and she started to bite her tongue, as if trying to distract and put herself together. Y/n put them on, but kept looking down for some seconds, before fixing her posture and raising her head, crossing her arms, still leant against the wall on one shoulder.

It was quite weird seeing y/n wearing the glasses. Even though she had noting that could possibly remind him of Roxy, Eggsy couldn’t stop the deja vu of his best friend. A sad smile adorned his lips. He missed her.

A Kingsman-style hologram of a young 16-year-old girl appeared sitting on one of the chairs, big extravagant round sunglasses framing her face along with bright pink streaks on her brown hair. Although she was a teenager (and dressed like one, in a jean jacket and a white tee that said “girl power” in red), she sat perfectly straight, very professionally.

“Good evening, gentlemen. I’m Tonks, Emerald’s tech and field agent. I just came back from an information gathering mission.” which, as a previous Emerald’s agent, y/n knew was just a fancy description for attending parties. Nothing too dangerous, especially for Emerald’s missions, that were more based in socialization and keeping an eye on people. Actually, y/n was impressed that Tonks had something substantial to report (especially to Kingsman) in a high school party. “A group of unmatchable individuals seems to be working together, all of them acting really uncharacteristic and very patronized. I detected the group spiking other teen’s drinks. I managed to intervene and get a sample of it. Agent Spellman also reported a strange movement, alike the one I observed, with a college group. We sent the samples to our biotechs, and the lab concluded it was a modified Mikey Pinn.” The girl grabbed her phone and sent something, the IPhone message sound reverberating through the room. “Now you have access to our outhouse cameras, Merlin.” 

Merlin quickly changed the projection above y/n to eight squares of video that showed each teen in one small room, some asleep on the beds, some walking around nervously, and one passed out on the floor. Tonks started talking again.

“Spellman and I brought the group of high school and college students to our outhouse. Whatever drug they’re on soon will wear off, and then we’ll be able to analyse what happened to them.”

“Was that the first ever occurrence on your field, Tonks?” Asked Yijun, and then turned to the Kingsman’s, explaining; “Emerald agents that work on high schools usually only have to get in action to stop violence and abuse at their missions. Situations like what we’re dealing with right now is uncharacteristic.”

“No, Boss. Some students stopped going to classes suddenly, but we checked: they all were confirmed on exchange programs abroad. Apparently, they never went.”

Y/n wasn’t leant on the wall anymore. She’d walked to the table, bent over it, hands open, pressed on the cold wood, all her attention on Tonks. Tension.

“Who were the kids? High school and college. Why choose them?” She said.

Tonks flipped through her phone, messaging Merlin more documents - the ring once again filling the room - before answering.

“A rugby player, two perfect grade kids and a foreign student were the high school kids. Apparently, it’s a pattern: physically strong people and awarded students that stand out for their knowledge of exact sciences.”

“Have you tracked were they were drugged the first time?” Continued y/n.

“Not yet, but...”

“I did;” said Merlin, suddenly, typing on his IPad.

A new image showed up on the wall. The front of a bar that looked like it used to be fancy ten years ago. Now, the paint was coming off the walls, and the huge opaque black doors were rusted, chains and a big old padlock kept them closed. It had no name on the outside, only a broken light up waning crescent moon, just the inferior part working, shining in a weak yellow light.

Eggsy knew the place. Actually, every teen and young adult in London knew Moonz: the flat broke bar that let underage kids come in and drink. You didn’t even need a fake ID, they would pretend to not be able to do math and let kids in. In some months, it became domain of teens, turning into a considerably safe place for them to get drunk and party. Also, it was the cheapest place to get booze.

But the underage drinking caused a bigger problem; since it was illegal, the neighbourhood didn’t have a lot of cops because the owner kept them away. Consequently, Moonz’s location became a centre of violence, kidnapping, and other heavy crimes.

The young Galahad saw y/n turn to the projection in slow motion, the act of being casual being thrown out of the window. For Eggsy, she looked like a robot who got rebooted and installed a completely different system of command. When she spoke again, her voice was strong and deep.

“Tonks, do you know when it started?”

“It?” Asked Eggsy. 

“The kidnappings.” Y/n answered. “The fact that they were drugging others looks like it was a kidnapping system. In this context, those kids were “recruiting” more teens.” 

Tonks checked her phone.

“No, Morgan. We couldn’t track it. They apparently are the first ones to come back.”

“Shit.” Y/n paced around the room. “Boss, permission to do an observation and protection mission at Moonz.”

“Permission granted” nodded Yijun “take Galahad with you.”

“Yi, I don’t think the gentlemen can pass as a teenager.” Y/n had stopped walking. She looked straight into Eggsy’s eyes. “With all due respect...”

Yijun shook her head. 

“You know there are other ways to get him inside undercover.”

Y/n ran her fingers through her hair, taking a deep breath. Eggsy could almost hear her thinking “Fuck. Fine.”.

“C’mon Galahad, we’ve got a job to do.”

Eggsy and Y/n were almost out of the room when Yijun called her agent again.

“Oh and Y/n.” The girl turned around. “Don’t engage. I’ll send Emerald agents to protect the kids, but you and Galahad can’t have your covers blown up. Do. Not. Engage. Do you understand?”

All Y/n did was nod slightly.

If you made it to here, thank you so much! I hope it was worth your time! Some feedback would be appreciated, I really wanted to see if you liked this (dumb) Eggsy I’m presenting.... If you don’t want to be in the taglist anymore, I totally understand! Just message me :)

Also!!!! Feel free to message me any questions about the fic and this chapter! I have some fun reasons for choosing those codenames and Diamond, Emerald and Amethyst as the names for the organization!

Amethyst taglist

@a-dorky-book-keeper @50shadesofuncomfortable @arizonacolleen @infinity-of-high-dreaming @toasty-fish @pink-smarties @mc225g @dadd-ilf @sueeatstheworld @katorgatorgalaxy @the-ink-and-salt-club @incorrect-mcdanno @xelizabethvalentinex @ahyestheandersons @thatdamnokie @wxxnks @awesomewees @ryedikkulus @discodeak @clacestan @y-dadd

(If you got the notification again, sorry! I had a problem with the taglist and had to do it again!

[emsartwork]

How do you find inspiration for costume design? Yours are so detailed!

Thank you! I got this ask right after i posted the mythix designs so im gonna use those as examples, but i can do one on an original piece too if you want.

so the winx designs are a little easier to pull inspiration from because i already have a starting point, and usually i just tweak the original designs so they’re less crazy and garish, and actually suit the girl’s personality and preferred magic.  

so my starting point for mythix was….. this hot mess. the one thing i actually do like about this transformation are the wings. The concept of a fairytale transformation is cool but the execution is pretty lackluster, like…… they arent flippin going to prom whats with the cocktail dresses. 

anyways. i looooooove vintage illustrations as references for just about anything so there are a lot of those

Flora is based off of a latina actress, so i chose a mexican religious figure as her base. Santa Muetre is a really cool combo of indigenous mexican culture and the imported catholic tradition of saints, she’s honestly one of my favorite figures ever. I used some “classic” imagery(aka the first few images on google or wikipedia) as well as some photo’s from various Dia de Muertos parades. her color scheme is basically the mexican flag but with a little added yellow.

Bloom is based off of Cinderella, not really for ethnic reasons, but more the “ash/fire” association. So Cinderella has a questionable origin, from what i know its either from egypt, greece, or china, but the most popularized version is french written by Charles Perrault(or Ashchenputtle in Grims fairytales). I used mostly baroque(?) era clothing references, tho the skirt cage is def more victorian. I also tried to reference birds in her wings and accessories because of the role they play in some of the versions(giving her the dress to wear to the ball, picking seeds out of ashes, pecking out the eyes of the step sisters…… you know normal bird stuff) I actually managed to put bloom in pink and blue! but its really more of an coral color so it doesn’t clash with her hair lol.    

Musa is bassed on Mulan, who was a real historical person(debatable) elevated to “fairytale” esq. levels. but any ways i used a lot of actually classical chinese depictions of Mulan, and honestly Musa was the easiest design besides flora. I tried to give her legitimate chinese “armor” but like, magic it up a little. her spear/wand was hard tho but musa’s actual mythix wand is NOT great.

Tecna is bassed on Vasilissa the Brave/Wise/Beautiful(she has a lot of names and a lot of roles in russion folklore ok) the most well known tales are Vasilissa facing off with babayaga, her as the frog princess, and her as daughter of the sea king. I tried to pull from primarily the image of her with the lighted skull, but also pulled from historical russian fashion. Her color scheme was HUGE PAIN IN THE ASS. I could not get anything to work even when i pulled from the illustrations. eventually i pulled from the frog princess angle so she’s green and yellow.

Aisha is based on my bad ass bitch Scheherazaaaaaaade!!!! Seriously i loved this lady from childhood. Shceherazade is the fictional narrator of 1001 nights, a book set in Saudi Arabia (if i remember tho the author was actually chinese which is why is has sooooo many inaccuracies in regards to actually depicting Saudi Arabia lmao do ur research folks) So i can’t remember if these images are classical illustrations or not but they’re some of my favorite on the internet. The wand is supposed to be one of those feather things you use to brush off blotting sand from an ink letter(calling back to the story telling). I tried to get the original wing shapes to work but couldn’t so i pulled a pattern from the background of one of the images.

sometimes though you only need one image to use as a reference because its so frickin perfect. Stella is based off of Pythia, a prophet of Apollo at the temple of Delphi. Apollo is the god of the sun, healing, and prophecy in greek mythology, so i thought this was a really interesting “dark and mysterious” angle on Stella’s sun powers. The image i used as a reference is by John Collier in 1891. my design is basically a half and half combination of stella’s official mythix and the reference.

Thats about it! I usually just mix and match and tweak and change until im satisfied. 

[heroquills-a]

s1lentsnip3r replied to your post: hmmmmmmmmmm……….. i feel like doing a random mun...

bet

cracks knuckles.

@s1lentsnip3r @chaosmixed @metallumdash 

words can’t describe how impressed i am by how much you bring your muses to life bwaze. i used to like, not really give a darn heck about metal sonic at all? but after that first thread we had where sonic and proxy got into a fight, i was immediately hooked. you just do such an incredible job at fleshing out characters that i otherwise wouldn’t have really thought much of before and you just have this unique and interesting spin on them that feels fresh. i love the way you play the chao and whisper’s wisps and atia is just a little gremlin but i love them so much, and i’ve literally never seen anyone play chaos before. you just have this way of utilizing that potential that your characters and concepts have and it’s just really awesome to watch. i love it. absolutely a stellar roleplayer. absolutely stellar mun!!

@skyfcx @masterprotector @cosmcther

ties you to a chair. listen here little mister. youre probably one of the OG ppl in this rpc that i’ve lowkey looked up to since first joining. you’ve already heard it plenty of times already but your writing is just ?? stellar ?? from the way you use colorful idioms, expressions, metaphors, to how you capture movement and action in such an engaging way. it’s always a treat to read. the way you portray your muses is just always spot on and i love how seamlessly you capture their mannerisms and speech patterns. your headcanons for tails and knuckles just make me so giddy they just feel so right for their characters, and as far as rosalina goes--- while i know next to nothing about the mario franchise or this character in particular i’m still intrigued enough to peek in on what she’s up to every now and then. over all, you’re a rad roleplayer and a fun person to chat with ooc !! 

@chaosbcrne 

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again. i adore how you write shadow. i’m constantly blown away by how authentic he always feels and how realistic you write him while still remaining accurate and true to his character. like i legit cannot even think of any other place or media i’ve seen besides the games themselves (before sega started botching up his character anyway) where he’s portrayed as accurately as you write him. you manage to balance the serious, aloof, hostile side of him with his playful, competitive, smug side AND the inner naive, almost child like side almost perfectly. and then there’s more, because you add so much depth to him and realistically expand on so many unexplored facets of his character and his roots !! you can just tell this is a character who’s endured so many hardships and is still trying to recover and move on, and despite everything that’s hardened him into the person he is today he still has that innocent curiosity about the world and it makes me so emo every. single. time. you just put so much work into him and it shows, from your icons to your headcanon posts, to even the most minute detail. even when you host events you just go So Hard at it you’re literally out here setting the standard dude. and don’t even get me started on your writing style. i was hooked by the very first thread we did, i felt like i could never hold a candle to it honestly. just. the way you narrate shadow’s feelings and thoughts, how you capture his actions, his movement, his speech patterns, is just so good. and your vocabulary is so colorful and rich. just. hgnfhg its top tier content ALRIGHT you inspire me to push myself and to keep improving all the time and i have to say i couldn’t ask for a better writing partner. i love you so much eph 💕💕💕

@1110-01111011

hello yes trikey i love your omega so much. i’ve never really thought much of the death bot before but seeing all the headcanons and fleshing out you do for him just makes him so much more interesting and fascinating. down to the most intrinsic detail you put in for him it’s just really cool to see and adds so much to him that just !! i love it man. every time i think abt omega now my mind just automatically goes back to your portrayal because he is Just omega. i appreciate all the depth you add to him and his relationships to the rest of his team, it’s so pleasing to see and really helps solidify how strong team dark’s dynamic truly is..... not to mention your art is hecking gorgeous??? like damn dude, goals. anyway,, thank u for the blessed omega content. absolutely 10/10

@coolxnxblue @oforbis @hcrofraid @mastcrplanncr @powderbluestreaks

toxi i immediately fell in love with your sonic the first time we ever interacted. you just capture his sass so well, i just could not stop giggling that first night. he’s still my favorite sonic in this rpc, to be honest. and don’t even get me started on your other muses. it still baffles me how you manage to take on such a huge raster of characters yet manage to flesh them out all so well. every one of them feels so evenly developed and solid and just like bwaze you make me care about characters that i otherwise wouldn’t have before. i feel like i have a huge newfound appreciation for eggman bc of you and unsurprisingly he’s now my fave eggman on here hands down. and it goes without saying your writing is just, phenomenal. you capture dialogue so beautifully, the way you narrate on the feelings your characters are experiencing is engaging, to the point i’m lowkey intimidated by it sometimes LMAO. also your AUs are just rad as hell? and rlly interesting?? and your art style too ????? 10/10 roleplayer, i just think youre neat.

@antibadnik @godcontained

hey you? yes you. i love your muses so much. i especially love how you write amy, to be honest. she’s been my favorite character since forever and like?? you do just such a good job with her? i appreciate that you choose not to erase her intense affection for sonic, because more often than not i see people tone it way down to almost non-existent and it really is just such a big part of her character. i like the way you delve into that mindset of her’s, and expand on it and how it affects her. i also just. love your writing too. you just have this way of conveying feeling in your writing that’s always a punch to the gut you can feel it that hard. your headcanons for elise are really interesting too and definitely nothing i’ve actually seen before, what with how her powers work and how having to go emotionally dormant has effected her after all this time.  also, i love ava. she is baby. it’s so cool getting to see a mute character!! all in all, its just good content man. god i love football.

@team-phantom @heartfelt-silver

pandaaaa i adore you !!! you were like my first friend in this heckin rpc. all of our dash shenanigans always have me wheezing and i just love your boys so much. i can certainly say without a shadow of a doubt that zero is one of my favorite takes on infinite. its hard to believe that he’s the same jackal who almost completely helped eggman take over the world--- he’s just come so far, he seamlessly fits into the rest of the cast. i adore how he works off of his team, and all their own unique little quirks that set them apart from each other. your headcanons and lore for your muse is just so sweet. and god i can’t get enough of your art?? your doodles always are a blessing to see ;-; i always appreciate you youre just such a sweet and kind mun, you’re so welcoming of ppl here and have this way of making ppl feel at home in this community. it absolutely wouldn’t be the same without you. keep it up <3

@lightdash @heartlop @enrichedheart

YOU. yes you. ame you’re so freakin’ cool and sweet. you’re always so nice and welcoming to people in the rpc it’s always a treat getting the chance to talk to you !! you’re another one of those peeps i look up to in this community TBH and youre muses are just portrayed and written so well!! i can just tell you’ve poured many years of thought, consideration, and work into your muses to the point that they’re just so finely tuned. i love the aesthetic you utilize for you blogs, from your icons to just the way you go about formatting your threads? and not to mention, your art style ??? is just so cute ??? ngl i lowkey wanna collab with you one of these days bc i just adore how you draw the sonic cast ;_; thank you for being a part of this rpc !! you’re wonderful !

@projectlightfox

moggg you’re so nice and chill to talk to. i love volt and harmony so much... they fit in really good with sonic world and mesh well with just about any characters i’ve seen them interact with so far--- even if its someone they don’t get along with. i’ve said it before but theyre just a really charming little duo and im always happy to see them on my dashboard. i love the overall aesthetic they got going, two travelers roaming the world from dimension to dimension. harmony is just a little bundle of precious fluffy joy and her interactions with sonic always make me cry. and volt--- he’s such a good dad !! he’s a really neat character and i’m certainly interested in learning more about the both of them. and as i said, you’re a rad person to talk to, i appreciate how welcoming and supportive you are of people. and your art style? absolutely adorable. thank you for being in this rpc ;-;

@dieviskais @solfading 

king!! i’ve never seen anyone write the way you do, choosing to shift the view point onto the reader as if they themselves are the muse. it’s such a unique and interesting way to look into your muse’s mindsets and express how they are feeling and what they’re doing. your take on silver is very fresh compared to the way he’s typically written. i appreciate you don’t take the baby silver uwu route like don’t get me wrong he IS baby but he’s not a baby. you certainly have really neat headcanons surrounding his backstory and how he grew up, it’s nice to see the grim reality of his harsh bleak life being represented. it’s good !! your other muses are intriguing too and i’m eager to learn more about them. i love auburn?? he’s a really cool oc dude his aesthetic and powers are A+. and you know, i may be terrible at expressing it but you’re a delight to talk to!! never feel bad or discouraged for popping into my dms i honestly appreciate the company ;-; thank u for being u

@orbviously / @cubeviously

THESE TWO BOTS. i love them so much. literally every time i see orbot or cubot now in any context i just think back to your portrayal of them hebby, they’re just so dang spot on and good. i love how you go about interacting with people with these two tbh it never fails to make me giggle. i love your art style too it’s just pleasing to look at! you have so many creative AUs for these bots i’m honestly impressed by how much you manage to create with these guys man--- from their human/bot designs to their mobianbot designs theyre just so cool ?? even your other muses are always entertaining to watch regardless of what fandom theyre from youre just so fun to interact with. and just, you’re always a pleasure to talk to ooc, youre always putting a smile on my face! youre awesome hebby 

@fishing-purple-cat

yes hi. sunny your take on big is so blessed. you’ve done so much justice for him. i’ve always really liked big tbh but i just love how much depth you put into his character, his backstory and his mannerisms. i love that you like,, actually give him a personality outside being a slow thinker. i can tell you’ve really developed your writing style with him, it speaks volumes about how much work you really put into writing him and it shows? heck, you even go the extra mile to draw your own icons and hang on i need a second to gush about your art because holy DAMN dude. your anatomy and painting abilities are nothing short of impressive--- especially your nack for painting backgrounds. i srsly gotta commission you at some point when i’m able to, heck. anyway, the rpc certainly wouldn’t be the same without you here

@lnfinitc

dude i love your take on infinite. he’s just about everything he should have been in forces, and even more. i love how malicious and intimidating you write him and your take on his speech patterns is just straight up eye-candy. i love your writing style, its so flavorful and rich--- your headcanons and lore on how infinite works is just astounding. and i like how you incorporate your drawings into your replies or threads too like even if its just icons your style is so heckin pretty ?? gosh dang. i’m definitely looking forward to interacting more in the future bc ur muse is just really fun and you seem like such a rad person !!

@pistolbitten

uhhh hello yes... while we haven’t interacted very much so far i JUST GOTTA SAY, i super enjoy your take on fang. from what i can tell he’s very well-rounded and fleshed out and a really interesting villain. i may or may not’ve been lowkey paying attention to that angel’s thesis thread you were doing w bwaze and aaron and i gotta say. holy damn. fang just done FUCKED UP. im certainly looking forward to him and shade interacting lmao. your writing style is so good too hh... just yeah i don’t have a whole lot to say if only because we haven’t interacted as much as i have with some of the other ppl on here BUT i certainly am looking forward to bc you seem cool. i’m loving what i’m seeing so far. have nack shoot sonic. DO IT.

@mobian-merc @funis-infinite 

duuuudeeee. i’ll be honest i was super intimidated by you at first asdkjsah i don’t even know why i was ??? but like. you’re so hecking nice and fun to talk to ;_; scourge is an actual literal dipshit yet you manage to make him very likable and you have such a fun take on him. i’ve always been a little conflicted on the character tbh because of how popular he is and he seems like the type i’d like but i knew nothing about him and was kinda put off by the over hype sometimes, but honestly? your portrayal won me over. i love him now. he’s so stupid and hE’S GREAT. your infinite also seems so cool too i gotta hecking respond to that starter you made me when i get the chance, im looking forward to infinite & sonic just. talking and sassing eachother probably. i really like your writing style too!!! and your icons are absolutely gorgeous ok. alright, that is all.

@flyinginfreedom

uhhhhhhh hello i love your rouge so much ???? she’s literally so cool... you capture her aesthetic and over all mysterious yet cunning vibe perfectly and it’s just always a pleasure to see her on my dash. i loved her interactions with sonic during eph’s roadtrip event so much. your headcanons just feel so her and spot on, and you still manage to add so much depth and personality to her i just love it so much. i love your blog’s aesthetic down to the icons, and even the way you format your threads. over all just a stellar rouge blog and a really cool & chill mun!!

@rosehammcr @antihedgehog

hi rosie uhm i love your amy so much ok. she’s such a sweet heart, i love how you incorporate her tarot cards ?? it’s literally so cool... and the accuracy on those readings is shocking. she’s just such a sweet heart god i’m getting emo thinking abt her tbh like amy is !! one of my fave characters and !! you write her so well !! and your eggman too, god he’s incredible. i love how sinister yet goofy he can be he’s just a perfect combination of intimidating and silly. your takes on orbot and cubot also bring a smile to my face and i love how you incorporate them into your interactions!! you also just seem like a rlly rad person and i’d love to interact more !! yeah !

@a-wind-of-freedom

yuniiiiiiIII !!  you’re such a sweet heart and your sonic is too. i’ve never seen someone play sonic the way you do before and it’s certainly interesting and unique !! you’ve got so many neat an thought out verses and AUs too, theyre all really intriguing !  our interactions with our sonics are always rlly blessed tbh starlight is just precious. i always appreciate getting to work with you as well for commission stuff, you’ve really been helping me out in that regard. plus you give me something artistic to work on and the chance to push my talents ! ;-; all in all you’re just a really sweet person and have a kind aura about you ! ;;

@champiionic

clears throat. hi yes you’ve been one of my fave sonics since day one. you’re just so creative with your muse its honestly impressive how many things you’ve able to come up with for sonic. from the portrayal you bring to the table down to your muse aesthetic its always just spot on you’ve got the blue speedster’s whole vibe down to a T. and your writing is just ? kisses my fingers. beautiful. your sonic is just so dang authentic, seeing him on my dash is always a pleasant sight. and i know this post is namely about sonic rpc muns & muses but i already love bubbles and blossom. i used to watch powerpuff girls when i was rlly little so its a real nostalgia trip to see them on my dashboard.

@hcpebloom @rcsebloom

bunny !! ur heckin sweet.. i love ur amy so much HSDFHDJ she’s just so soft. and unique too!! your headcanons for her are just so cute and make her stand out in her own way and i just appreciate that yo. and i admittedly don’t know a whole lot about cosmo since i havent really watched that far into sonic x but you’ve certainly got my attention with her. we just gotta interact more man ur muses are so precious !! ;_; 

@fortruechaos 

you !! your shadow is so good dude ! your portrayal of him is just so hecking accurate,, i highly appreciate how noble you write him to be. he’s serious, he’s prickly, but he’s got the world’s best interest at heart and it makes my heart do the fluttery thing. your writing is so good too gosh. no to mention youre just so hecking nice ??? youre just overall a rlly sweet mun & i appreciate your presence here in the rpc

@glittcrngcld @livelifc

hey fretcher ? ily. your muses are just so good from your canon characters to your ocs, i just love them sm?? and your ART? i swoon every time i see your doodles on my dash i’m still not over those doodles of lilly and azure ;-; not to mention your edits are scarily good like shit dude teach me your ways. your takes on your muses are awesome man i love ur sonic he’s such a MEME. and elise !!! she makes me so emo god. thank u for your blessed portrayals of these characters ! @elektrisch-felidae​

YOU. precious is just, precious?? HAH. i love her, she’s so cool tbh. she’s so chill and laid back and seems like the kinda cool cat sonic can totally vibe with. you yourself are also rlly chill and fun to interact with--- even if we haven’t much so far. its no secret i just love sonic ocs so much and precious is just awesome. i love the idea of electricity powers. absolutely need to have sonic hang with her more ;;

@coldheartbeauty 

SPEAKING of cool cats with cool powers, i love raven. her sass is just super entertaining to see on the dashboard tbh. i have to see her and sonic get into a sass off one of these days. her powers are also really cool too ? she reminds me of blaze in a sense, but just completely different in her own right. i also just hella love your art style its so cute, your doodles are always adorable to see!! 

INHALES. ok. im done. if i missed anyone i am so sorry i ran out of steam. thank you all so much for making this rpc such an entertaining, dynamic, and creative place to be !!! 

[killinbills]

Director’s cut to tragedy of Margo valen

ok so. first off im gonna talk about margo the character then the chapter of the name!!!

so. margo. when i first wrote go lightly i didnt wanna talk much about margo’s character at the beginning, so that if i wanted to go a different direction with the character i hadn’t put myself into a box early on. holly’s mother was introduced as, what, someone in azkaban, and then that was that for a while. and honestly i felt like i didnt need to drop in margo that early anyway, because a lot was going on, and then that meant that when i got a little further into the fic i could introduce this new character and keep readers excited. so like at the start, i didn’t think margo would turn out like she did. honestly at the start i didnt really want to have margo in the fic, or at least not that much because i personally didnt find her that interesting. but oh boy. when i wrote the holly dearest letter can i just say i thought she was so cool. like. her story was so interesting and fun and different. and again even then i didn’t think she’d be full on psychopathic, but like im so glad i kept my options open so that i could go down that route?? and i think with margo, i genuinely like her as a character before she went to azkaban, and honestly? i like her as a villain. like, i think she compliments holly really well, especially because margo as the antagonist happened once holly went through the whole “right or easy” phase, but still, because of margo, holly was still conflicted between both sides? like, margo still manipulated holly into going along with most things, and really holly doesn’t properly leave the possibility of joining the death eaters until her mother dies.

idk. i think margo and holly compliment each other. like, margo could’ve joined the order, she could’ve left the death eaters, and she probably would’ve been a lot like holly grown up. and likewise, if holly joined the death eaters then she would’ve slowly evolved into margo post-azkaban. and like......... the fact that u guys hated margo so much at the end??? like??? sis that’s GOOD i WANT you to HATE HER lmao

so. the actual chapter itself. the first part is all margo’s narration, and i didn’t plan that?? but when i actually sat down to write it i decided it would work best, especially since the chapter is literally all about her. honestly the most interesting thing about margo and holly’s dynamic is how corrupted and like, distorted margo’s love for holly has become? like i think margo still loves holly, but because margo’s only source of hope in azkaban had been her daughter and like,,, margo would’ve suffered a lot in azkaban, so these two things sort of work together in the way that her love slowly became more obsessive and corrupt as she did. like atticus wasn’t that different after azkaban but then he didn’t do anything wrong? he gave up his life to look after a child. like. margo tortured and killed people, like, she killed her own parents? she lost regulus because she was too caught up in herself to realise that he had a good point? (although i think margo hated holly towards the end of the chapter aka when she realised holly wasn’t the daughter she had been obsessing over for years, but instead, her own person... and stuff)

but anyway. idk if you guys have noticed but i have this habit of my writing style to become sort of omniscient, especially towards the end of parts, or when a big plot point has happened? and i think that kind of reflects in the way that although the narration is by margo, it also floats along a little at the start, going through margo’s life. and then once holly kills margo the narration is by holly, sure, but it’s so detached, because like holly is in such shock about what she’s done. oh!! and the line about “the wretched girls’ hand” was written months before i wrote the chapter, but i thought of that line as margo’s “last line” and like. it just fits so well with how deranged margo’s view of holly has become

honestly i could talk hours about margo and holly!! 

send me a director’s cut of certain fics/chapters from fics!

[abundantchewtoys]

HS Epi: Meat p19 reaction

I... don't really know what to expect anymore.

What could the wallet contain. A Dad note. A Terezi note. Or captchalogued people?

Odds are even we won't be seeing it right away. Though I'd dread to see Dirk's omniscient narrative voice take over narration of the post-victory scenes.

Still, Dirk should know better by now than to rely on his strong points this much. They're not evened out by a reliable moral compass all the time, and he's seen the results of that before. Guess with great knowledge comes great arrogance.

"Anyway, back to the B Plot." Ah yes, the B Plot. On Earth C. Featuring A2 trolls Karkat and Kanaya.

"Right about now, Jade should be wrapping up her political presentation to Roxy and Calliope" Ah, skipping right to the end of that, are we.

"Jade’s got this disarming combo of head-in-the-clouds flightiness and the kind of legit, down-to-earth cred that can only be earned by having done something like cutting open your own grandfather and stuffing him full of polyurethane foam." Ah yes, one of these definitely led to the other.

"neoliberal austerity measures" How often can we repeat the same 3 words?

"

Roxy groans upon hearing the phrase “neoliberal austerity measures” for no less than the third time in this presentation." Roxy the audience surrogate. Since it's our 3rd time too.

"JADE: as i outlined here in graph b-2 JADE: and here in figure a-6" It's a good thing timelines can only be scratched the once. A6 Alternia would have been a dreadful sight.

"JADE: and here!!! in this very spooky drawing i dictated to callie JADE: (great drawing by the way!!!) CALLIOPE: ^u^" Hah, Calliope's drawing skills have found another use! Political Powerpoints.

"JADE: the thing is that jane is an establishment leader JADE: shes looking at doing things the way our old universes did them JADE: shes pretty convinced that shes going to be able to replicate the capitalist hierarchies that earth had but in a more “responsible” way JADE: but none of that stuff actually worked!!!!!" That's a nice summary of the things that are wrong to Jane's approach, actually. Though it doesn't provide an answer to the underlying problem yet.

"ROXY: and u think karkat can do better? JADE: i think its worth it to give him a chance JADE: hes a leader of the people AND hes experienced firsthand what happens when establishment goes too far JADE: which i imagine you can sympathize with!" This really feels like a boardroom conference, with Jane trying to get a preliminary backing out of a captain of industry.

"Her graphs are floating around the living room in disarray." Hah, she's using her space powers for this in another mundane application. Though... not in any offical setting, it seems. Roxy and Calliope's home.

"CALLIOPE: i’m... CALLIOPE: going to get Us tea and snacks. woUld yoU like some, jade?" To be fair, Calliope's probably going to follow Roxy in her eventual decision, anyway. Her childhood fascination with trolls might have been abandoned for new interests, or she might trust her friend's judgment in matters political.

"Calliope excuses herself from the conversation, and flees to the kitchen, seemingly making no attempt to disguise the fact that she is in fact fleeing." What a cutey. Calliope might in fact be trying to flee anything reeking of negativity, associating it with black romance and such.

"Jade deflates as she watches her go, sensing that her presentation wasn’t the slam dunk she was hoping for." It's so easy forgetting that the narration is also at least in part steering the story at this point. >_<

"ROXY: well i gotta say ROXY: this has been a hella convincing argument all in all ROXY: buuuuut idk if i can help u out" Maybe they would actually like to stay neutral?

"She and Calliope live in a belfry above New Prospit. One end of their living room is an oriel window that looks out over a public park. The other disappears into an arcading hallway lit at the far end by a giant stained glass window that Calliope made herself. The corbels supporting it have windy, abstract shapes carved into them." Artsy! I didn't know what to picture for their living space, but actually Calliope taking to carapacian art-deco and giving it a cheruban twist really works!

"That’s what keeps Jade Harley flitting from couch to couch, relationship to relationship. She can’t stop thinking to herself that “home” comes awfully close to rhyming with “alone.”" Home Alone, huh?

"Home is John, who doesn’t call anymore. Home is when Rose and Kanaya welcome her in from a cold night and help her set lyrics to her sick basslines. Home is here, snorting at Roxy’s irreverent method of storytelling and admiring Callie’s art. Home is Dave and Karkat." This REALLY reminds me of the Tramp, as he had a home in every street he frequented.

"ROXY: im alls ABOUT the sowing of discord among my childhood friends" She's had quite her fill of the dramas. That's a valid reason to stay out of it. She'll just have to weight it against the downsides of not influencing the outcome of the election in any positive way.

"JADE: dirk got to you first ROXY: not even ROXY: i got no problem tellin dirk where to stick it lmao ROXY: but dirks not the one running JADE: you think hes NOT the one pulling the strings behind the scenes? ROXY: sure but give janey a lil credit" On the one hand I'm glad Roxy's got such a backbone, on the other hand, off course we know Dirk's still influencing the outcome at the moment. Also, uh, he's got no issues invading the lives of his friends personally, even after telling us off on the subject first.

"ROXY: but shes yknow JADE: ruthless? :B

Roxy frowns. Jade is being pretty unfair." I get the feeling Jade is less good at filtering her words lately. And I also get the feeling Dirk is starting to sow a little conflict.

"ROXY: shes gotta be miss perfect all the time for the billboards n press meetings ROXY: always wearin those power suits trying to look like a big bad bitch JADE: you mean like....... the condesce? ROXY: wow ouch JADE: im not just imagining it though, right??? JADE: you see it too JADE: not to dredge up something horrible from your history JADE: but her whole image is just kinda...... *woof* ROXY: is that what you guys think? ROXY: u and dave and karkat?" It's something they should have brought up via intermediary channels to Jane on beforehand. Not let fester until all they could think of to "stop" her was introduce a late-to-the-party candidate.

Jade might also be doubly upset with Jane for seemingly mirroring the Condesce, as they were both brainwashed by her.

"Roxy leans forward and stares Jade down, like she’s searching for something behind Jade’s eyes." That's the same thing she did with John! Guess she's trying to find out some of her secrets.

"Jade unwittingly responds in kind, looking for meaning behind Roxy’s gaze. But she comes up empty. And to be honest, so do I." That unfathomable personality might be your spanner in the works, Dirk. I can only hope she's secretly onto him. Her Void powers manifest the 'obscurity' different from Equius.

"In the spirit of full disclosure, Roxy’s the only one left I haven’t been able to crack. Her mind remains a total enigma to me, just like it always has." It's interesting, since they share so much in childhood upbringing, progeny, demeanor even at times...

"invisible, even to increasingly omniscient parties such as myself" *coughDocScratchcough* ... What would Reload Roxy be doing right now, assuming the session's timeline didn't stop when Caliborn's soul 'left' it?

"ROXY: but shes not betty crocker ROXY: and i luv her and i dont wanna hurt her feelings" N'aww.

"ROXY: and thats p much all there is to say on the matter" Second time the phrase's been used in the epilogues!

"CALLIOPE: oh, i’d rather stay Uninvolved, thank yoU." Passive player to the brink.

"CALLIOPE: i feel like interfering in both politics and a personal argUment between my friends woUld be impolite as well as kind of... stressfUl, to be honest. JADE: yeah JADE: sorry callie i probably shouldnt have put all that on you CALLIOPE: less apologizing, more snacking!" It's nice to see they're cutting her some slack. A horrible childhood, an early death, a spiel as a ghost... Oh, sure, she's one of the good guys and as such would have some responsibilities in the end, but it's nice for a change they don't expect too much from her. Maybe a bit too little for her own good, but still.

"Calliope claps her hands together. It’s a bright noise. Her tone of voice is bright too. All these years and she still can’t believe that she has so many friends. She smiles at Jade, and Jade smiles back. The tea tastes great. The cakes are even better. Callie’s an artist in everything she does." ^u^ Aww, that warms my heart at least.

"JADE: wow callie youre such an amazing hostess!" ... Well, she's a more excellent host than Doc Scratch, for sure!

"ROXY: psst not “her,” “them”" ... I see! Well, guess we'll be getting some more insight into the androgyn bodies of cherubs and how Calliope has updated her self image over all these years? Caliborn still had the giant eyelashes, so it stands to reason there were also other, more masculine traits to Calliope's body even when she still shared it with her brother.

"JADE: oh wow!" Oh, I figured Jade already knew about Calliope's preferred pronouns, but it seems not!

"CALLIOPE: bUt i did take comfort in “being a girl” for a very long time. this is something i’ve only recently decided." ... I just remembered how Calmasis also was this androgynous figure. ... I wonder if Calliope will be thinking about a name change.

So, I don't think Roxy's haircut is a sign she's genderfluid now too, but I imagine a lot of fanart has already been created for butch!Roxy by the time I read this.

"ROXY: m-me too actually" Oh. N-never mind then. That caught me unaware! I didn't see that in Roxy. For one, despite all the pink and the ponies, she didn't seem like she felt "trapped" in a role to me. Unlike Calliope, where I can see how she might have felt obliged to embrace everything not-Caliborn.

But this does shed a whole new light on Mom's overly childish and girlish bedroom in the lab. Like she was trying to compensate for something. Uhm... It might also be one of the main reasons behind her drinking problem. Her embracing girlish, adult woman habits but never feeling like they 'fit'.

Well well. Homestuck's main characters continue to be representation incarnate.

"Wait.

   What?" PFFFFFFFFFF. I love it. Dirk's reaction is gold. Guess this completely blindsided him too and didn't shed any more lights on the inner workings of her mind than he thought. So even if he knew she was holding something back after the "yea", and maybe encouraged her to keep speaking, he didn't know what to expect.

"Roxy? Seriously?

Like I said, fucking inscrutable." Dirk has NOT just had an "I knew it!" moment.

"I never would have guessed. Not that I’ve spent much time contemplating issues related to gender. I’m pretty secure in my expression of masculinity, and..." That's a suspiciously specific acknowledgement, though, Dirky boy. :P

"You know what? Fuck this. I don’t owe anyone an explanation of any sort on this topic. I’m confident with who I am, what I am, my gender, as well as my understanding of the concept. You want my honest opinion? It’s fucking fantastic. Good for them. Both of them, I mean, but also, both of them in a singular fashion, since each one can now individually be referred to by the conventionally plural word “them.”" Pffff, of all the things. I didn't think this would have Dirk fly off the handle in such a Dave-way, while still narrating, but I'm happy to see it. In an out-of-story sense, Dirk is currently the audience surrogate, showcasing what a "true fanboy"'s reaction could be like, if they were both shocked to the core but mature enough to get over their shock without throwing around accusations and tantrums.

But yeah, at least the aloofness is gone from his voice, for just this time.

"I’m ecstatic for this personal development they’ve embraced, for the people they are, the lack of gender they identify with, and the pronouns they prefer. I’ve got no problem with it whatsoever, and frankly, it’s fucking insulting anyone would ever imagine otherwise." I can picture him speaking through gritted teeth, it's glorious! 'This is good, this is fine. I am doing great!'

"ROXY: ahah hahaha hell of a way to come out" Ooh, so she's not even out to Jane or Rose yet!

"ROXY: what even is gender" That is SUCH a Roxy thing to say. Also, almost stoner like. Picture Gamzee going like (in his quirk): 'Have you ever really THOUGHT about gender, man? I mean, really THOUGHT about it.'

"Jade looks at where her hands are folded in her lap. Bites her lip. She has her own concerns about this, her own thoughts. Reasonable thoughts, I’d say." "ROXY: i mean that was all stuff from our old universe ROXY: whyd we even bring it here right? JADE: right" I think for Jade it's not something she'd discard so easily! I mean, it all depends on whether 'gender' is something antigonal to your self image, in the end, I guess. If it isn't hindering you... that's how you stay heteronormative in some or all elements.

"Calliope takes a teacake between two of her claws and eats it delicately, hyper-aware of the horrible gnashing and snapping her powerful jaw is capable of.

CALLIOPE: my ideas aboUt gend—

SHIT. Between two of /their/ claws." HAH. Oh my god. The narration cut off Calliope. ... Pffff, though it IS a good callout, since I've been using gendered pronouns still to refer to Calliope. Whoops!

"CALLIOPE: i sUppose i only thoUght of myself as a girl because my, Um... CALLIOPE: my brother took mascUlinity qUite serioUsly." A) Still not saying his name :P B) Using his preferred pronouns.

"CALLIOPE: by which i mean, he became very enthUsiastic aboUt all the things it sUpposedly meant to be a boy. CALLIOPE: cherUb existence is dichotomoUs, bUt not in the same way hUman biology is. CALLIOPE: i sUppose oUr view of hUman cUlture indirectly inflUenced alternia’s development, which in tUrn affected yoUrs, which is something i’ve had a lot of time to think aboUt since we came here." Oh right! Lord English & Doc Scratch helped shape Alternia's development, so in a lot of bad ways there was a focus on power and masculinity, which may have trickled down into Earth's because of who created our universe, and thus it might all have been a self fulfilling prophecy, what Caliborn's gender identity is concerned! Guess we were due another one of these loops. :P

"ROXY: so much of what earth c thinks what boys and girls “SHOULD” do comes straight from the imagination of a bunch of dumb teens ROXY: which is totally FUCKED JADE: sure" Yes, and so much of what Earth C "should" be like, as a victory state reward planet, and the epilogues by extension, exists only in the imagination of a bunch of dumb humans spread over this globe. :P I reek a callout. Not undeserved, mind.

"She probably would have loved being a “they” when she was a teen." (Referring to Jade.) I'll grant you that, Dirk. But I thought you were doing paraphrasing other people's thoughts for the course of this conversation?

"i liked the idea of dirk" He'll love to hear that. :P Well, you know, Karkat had the same thing, he loved the idea of Condesce as a powerful leader, if not always the result of that leadership.

"ROXY: and also literally no one else on the entire planet was alive at the time

ROXY: but we had some babies without even bein consulted about it anyway so w/e" Context!

"JADE: personally im a big fan!

And like that, Jade’s smiling again." Nothing like Dave & Karkat to lift her mood. :P

"The storm clouds pass so quickly in her world, you almost wouldn’t have thought there was anything wrong at all. Roxy and Calliope certainly didn’t notice.

But there is something wrong. And this time, they’ll notice." Uhhh, wrong with Jade? Or something wrong with Earth C in general? Besides Dirk taking over, I mean. Oh no! ... Calliope left the kettle on! :P

"JADE: i... JADE: i.........

Jade drops her tea. The cup hits the floor and shatters." ... Is she passing out?? Just like Rose??

... Oh no. This doesn't have anything to do with John going back, retconning the timeline, and some of their selves being killed right? It shouldn't influence them, since they're from a different timeline, but with the talk about canon and relevance and truth and shit...

Is Dave going to pass out next???

Did John accidentally change the Reload timeline to be the alpha one, and is the future adjusting to the changes??? Or is it due to something to do with Lord English' powers in killing a different 'real' version of them?

"She takes in a sharp breath. She’s not feeling well suddenly. She’s dizzy, feverish, seeing things beyond her field of vision. A blinding flash of light. A black, perfect circle, burning a hole in her eyes." Wow. Just like John, she gets a vision of the Black Hole! So, maybe it's more like she gets backlash from suddenly absorbing the memories of Reload Jade.

"She doesn’t look bad at all— Jade wears unconsciousness well, having spent the better part of her life napping." Aaaand we're back in sleeping beauty terrain.

"But she can’t hear her. Jade is somewhere else right now." Uhhhhh. I thought they didn't really dream in the dreambubbles post-victory no more?? Also, those were all destroyed by LE, anyway.

Dang. That's weird.

Are the B1 kids (adults) actually going to be gathering in the Furthest Ring in 'person'? But why, and how? ... There isn't anything like a 'dreambubble self' body that persists in the Furthest Ring that John could have woken up like how you could wake people up on Derse and Prospit. ... Now I'm reminded of an old fanart I made of a green moon circling the Green Sun, with green dream selves for all humans & trolls we knew at the time (B1 and A2). :P

[blaperile]

Homestuck Epilogues - Meat - Page 13 (Epilogue 2 Page 5)

[dustinjanthony]

SORRY BIG SAD POST HERE, POSITIVE ENDING THOUGH

feel like i should uhhhhhhhh say some things

i've been thinking a lot for the past week or two. been feeling a lot. been really disconnected from my body, feels like i'm narrating a nature documentary about myself. feels like im an animal that's vaguely aware of being an animal. i guess i am.

anyway i don't expect anyone to read this and also i'm on mobile and never learned how to be competent at this god damn website so i can't pop in a read more on this so, sorry. just gotta put this energy out into the world and twitter takes too much work.

2018 was a rough year for me. one of the worst years i've experienced from a mental health perspective, with much sharper ups and downs than i'm used to. hadn't really gone from a "this is mostly fine" kinda day and over the course of one day slipped into i guess. actively suicidal. there were a lot of points things could have gone really, really bad. and they uh. didn't and i can't even take half credit for that. that was about 75% other people stopping to actually help me and maybe 25% me allowing myself to be helped.

i tore down basically the entire structure for the way i view the world while also putting myself into a new, stressful situation. i took basically any sense of normalcy or comfort i had and burned it to the ground. i stopped being complacent in my destruction.

i realized almost all my insecurities, and many of my problems stem from my childhood, and that hit me like a wrecking ball. the past 19 years of my life i've been overwhelmed by all my problems, this massive, messy knot of string. and in those moments i realized - it's just one length of string. it's the same thing, doubled over on itself, tightly wound and folded and yet still simple, at it's core.

and yeah, for a bit, that broke me. knowing the core truths i'd based my self perception on to be untrue, seeing i'm not inherently worthless, i'm not simply a burden, i'm not less deserving than others, i'm not defective

i didn't start like this, i was shaped like this.

being that is was the end of the year and i'dve liked to lighten up a little bit i let that be the end of my work for the year. demolition team's done - no need to call in the construction crew quite yet. now i didn't really lighten up i just like. got oral surgery and was emotionally unstable for like a week but that's not really the point of this.

ive been spending a lot of time not being asleep when i want to be and that's given me a lot of time to think about what i want. i don't do resolutions partially out of a fear of being made fun of for doing resolutions and also because i'm not really interested in promising myself a path of behavior.

if 2018 was a razing - destroying all those notions about the world that built a framework for my self hatred - 2019 is going to be a raising. building a new frame, directing a better way to move through the world. some of it's happening naturally - i'm not mad at myself for existing in situations i would have been, previously - i get mad about not standing up for myself. perhaps a little too mad - but still, an improvement. picking out cornerstones, like "i am worthy" and "i am loved" and "i can love" and "i wasn't born this way, i was broken, and i can put myself back together, even better, and i never have to thank them for what they did."

i want to love who i am, on the good days and the bad days, i want to take care of myself out of understanding and respect, not pity, i want to fight for this year. i want to do my best, and stop trying to compare my best with anyone else's, and stop worrying about my best, i want to be at peace with the best i can do. i want to do the things i want future me to do. i want to be future me now. i'll never get there unless i move things from "future" to "present".

i guess this is about action. responsibility to me and my body. self care. recovery. growth. experience. i want to try. i want to be okay with trying. fuck what yoda said. fuck every time anyone thought saying that line in that dumbass voice to me was funny when i said i was trying. really. fuck what yoda said. i'd rather try and fail than not try at all.