#anyway still this was the only thing i could think about during this scene i lost it
hi! i'm actually really interested in the "is cait sith reeve" debate and was fascinated by your post since you firmly believe cait sith is his own person.
i'm playing through dirge right now so i can't comment fully on what transpires there, but based on rebirth alone i'm having trouble believing cait sith isn't controlled by him. i know your post said rebirth excluded a scene that made it clear cait sith is his own person, but I'm not sure what you're referring to exactly. The only thing I can think of is the original game, where Cait Sith sacrifices himself and says not to forget him even if another Cait Sith comes along...which is a good point, though one could potentially argue that Reeve is just sentimental.
Anyway, what I want to know is: if Cait Sith has a personality separate from Reeve and can move independently while Reeve is busy, then why does Cait Sith repeatedly go offline in Rebirth while Reeve is busy? This is the main argument I see and one of my favorites, so I think answering that could help your own. The only arguments I can think up are either that the devs wanted to give players clear hints that Reeve controls Cait Sith, or that he wants to make sure he's monitoring Cait Sith when the cat interacts with the party. But besides that, Cait Sith really doesn't act like a different person. Sure, he has an accent and is silly, but he doesn't make any comment whatsoever (as far as I know) that indicates he isn't Reeve himself. In fact, the party treats Cait Sith and the Shinra employee controlling him as the same person, and Cait Sith doesn't attempt to rebuke it. (Outside of maybe lying that he's a mere amusement park attraction?)
i do admit, if dirge seriously contradicts this interpretation, it's weird for the devs to go against it...but as someone who once believed cait sith and reeve were separate and changed their mind after rebirth, I just don't think there's enough evidence based on rebirth alone to claim that cait sith is his own person.
on that note, you mentioned cait sith has his own likes and dislikes separate from reeve and i'm actually really curious about that! do you have an example of that? :D It sounds like fun trivia lol (i really like reeve and cait sith...)
anyway thank you for reading till the end! sorry if this is unwelcome
There's a scene in Dirge where Reeve and Cait walk out of the same room together, reacting to one another independently:
Further, Cait Sith only goes into stasis twice in the entirety of Rebirth as far as I can recall? Once at the end of a board meeting that Reeve was active in, but seemingly not for the entirety of the board meeting, as Cait Sith appeared to be mid-conversation and trailed off when Reeve got bad news—this makes sense if he's connected to Cait Sith and has the capacity to control him directly as needed, but not if he had to do so actively 100% of the time. The other time is in Cosmo Canyon, because he's clearly not interested in their woo-woo metaphysical nonsense, and he cites it as taking time to recharge his batteries.
Reeve is still working as Director of Urban Planning during all of this, so I find it super hard to believe that he's spending 99.9999% his time at a computer or mentally controlling and speaking through a doll while also running the department that is trying to put Midgar back together after the plate drop—particularly not since we have official meta stating that he's an Inspire, which I cited in a reblog.
Beyond that, there's this bit in the OG, which Cait Sith says to himself, in an empty room:
There is no explanation for this if Cait Sith is entirely remote controlled. There's no one else here to hear it, no reason for him to express these feelings—or even have feelings in the first place!
In Rebirth it's even more clear, because he expresses physical strain as he's literally holding the Temple up by keeping himself wedged under the platform. He's uncomfortable, he's physically taxed, he's in pain. Again, most of this occurs in an empty room, and would not happen if he was just a toy that Reeve had to control directly like a complex RC car or something.
The concept of likes and dislikes that are independent is less solidly shown in-canon, but they have distinctly different personalities, and Reeve is very clearly not interested in things like prophecies and the Promised Land and all that—he is a scientist at the end of the day, a civil and mechanical engineer—and yet Cait Sith's whole shtick is to tell fortunes! This is also something that he seems to enjoy doing quite a bit, even if he's not very good at it. (He gets better. Kinda.)
Cait Sith is obviously connected to Reeve, but it's equally obvious that he's not analogous. Presumably Cait Sith doesn't care when he's equated to Reeve because he is Reeve's eyes and ears in the field, even when he's not in direct control. The fact that he only really talks about himself as an individual when he's alone kind of implies that he'd rather the others not know, because he doesn't want them to be upset about what's going to happen to him; if he were nothing more than a glorified RC toy, this wouldn't be a concern, because he wouldn't have concerns at all.
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any hopes for kiwami 3? like things u wanna see added or changed stuff like that
if they dont keep kiryu's goofy walk stance and the hoof-like walk sounds i dont wanna play it
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You ever think the reason Horatio was so loyal to Hamlet was because he felt like he was responsible since he showed him the ghost in the first place?
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It's 11 PM, but one of my favorite little Darcy/Elizabeth moments happens while she still hates him and thinks he's a depraved monster, and I find it really entertaining.
It's during the Kent section, when Darcy calls at the parsonage and finds Elizabeth alone. During a longer, awkward conversation in which they both deeply misunderstand each other, they have this tiny interchange:
[Darcy:] “This seems a very comfortable house. Lady Catherine, I believe, did a great deal to it when Mr Collins first came to Hunsford.”
“I believe she did—and I am sure she could not have bestowed her kindness on a more grateful object.”
“Mr Collins appears very fortunate in his choice of a wife.”
“Yes, indeed; his friends may well rejoice in his having met with one of the very few sensible women who would have accepted him, or have made him happy if they had. My friend has an excellent understanding—though I am not certain that I consider her marrying Mr Collins as the wisest thing she ever did."
So: they are in Mr Collins's house. Darcy tries to re-start the conversation with a polite nothing about the house. Elizabeth agrees about Lady Catherine's micro-managing, but can't resist the chance to make a sly jab at Mr Collins (who is not present) to Darcy (a genuine villain, as far as she believes).
Darcy's reply looks a bit like an attempt to redirect the conversation into safer waters (they can agree that Charlotte is cool!). But although his remark is only somewhat related to what Elizabeth said, I think it's a natural follow-up in his mind because he is also insulting Mr Collins, if more subtly.
He could have praised Mr Collins's judgment in choosing Charlotte or just said something nice about Charlotte; he doesn't. Instead, he suggests that Mr Collins's choice of Charlotte was a matter of good fortune—or chance, as Charlotte herself would say!—on Collins's part. Darcy and Elizabeth both know Collins is a fool and that his choice of a woman like Charlotte says nothing about his judgment, only about his good fortune. (Elizabeth has even better reason than Darcy to know how much Collins ending up with Charlotte was lucky for him, but Darcy can see it anyway.)
Darcy's phrasing gives him some plausible deniability, but I think he's generally quite careful with his wording and the implicit insult to Mr Collins is not accidental.
Elizabeth, I think, takes this exactly as intended. She's not at all confused about where this tangent came from or offended by it or anything. She readily seizes on the new line of conversation as encouragement to keep insulting Mr Collins and his appeal to women with functioning brainpower.
Elizabeth is pretty scrupulously polite in general, so I kind of love that she just starts venting about her absolute contempt for Mr Collins and the Collins/Charlotte marriage to Darcy in the middle of a tense and weird conversation in Mr Collins's house. And I love that Darcy, who is otherwise more or less dog-paddling his way through this conversation, is like "yeah, your friend seems really cool, that dumbass is lucky he accidentally chose someone with a brain."
Elizabeth: "Right? And, let me add-"
(Is it a bit of an asshole move on both their parts in the context of that scene? Yeah, I think a little. I also love it! Please trash-talk obnoxious hosts in their own parlours for the rest of your lives.)
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TOUCH STARVED
PAIRING ➩ heeseung x reader
SUMMARY ➩ your bestfriend dyes his hair blonde and old feelings start to surface.
WC ➩ 6.7k
AUTHORS NOTE ➩ I recommended listening to I know by Faye Webster Short and simple but I’ve had writers block and just wanted to try to work through it with something easy and comfortable. Thank you for your patience and support NOT PROOFREAD
“Woah.”
“Woah? What kind of reaction is that?” The boy in you doorway had completed deflated after hearing your lifeless exclamation, shoulders dropping in a small sigh as his eyebrows turned downwards on his tired face to glare at you.
It wasn’t a strange sight to see Lee Heeseung standing in the hallway outside of your apartments doorway, even less strange that he was carrying two convenience store slushees, one in his hand and the other tucked neatly into the crease of his elbow. His free hand had just fallen to his side from pushing his hoodie off his head and revealing the only strange thing about this scene.
“When did you do that?” You were instinctively moving your arm up to reach out and touch his hair that he had freshly bleached blonde apparently, shocking you for just a second when he showcased it with an expectant look on his face.
You caught yourself before touching him but he didn’t seem to notice anyways, pushing past you with another sigh and dramatically flopping onto your couch with a grouchy expression.
“It looks nice Hee, just took me by surprise.” You were following behind him and sitting on the couch with a bit of distance between the two of you, watching him curiously and taking note of the ways his features changed underneath the new hair color.
Heeseung had been your best friend ever since you moved into the city a few years ago, frequently stopping at the comic book store he worked at to pick up gifts to send back home to your little brother and eventually, once he had quit for a better opportunity, he had rushed out of the store one day and asked if you wanted to exchange numbers so you didn’t lose touch.
It had become such a casual routine for you to see him, holding small conversations that over time turned into lengthy talks that accidentally held up the stores lines sometimes.
A handful of days contained you stopping by during your lunch break and eating with him behind the register. Heeseung made you laugh harder than anyone you’d ever met and you found that to be even more true once you started seeing him outside of his work.
Two years passed since he quit his job and you’d almost forgotten what it was like to not know him, easily blending into your life and becoming the first person on your call list at all times. Hence why it wasn’t exactly strange for him to be pouting on your couch, disappointed you hadn’t reacted more to the sudden change of his hair.
Heeseung was always the more impulsive one out of the two of you and he constantly seemed to be jumping from hobby to hobby, the perfectionist side of him never letting him stick to learning just one thing. His style and aesthetic had switched about a dozen times since you’d met him and he was never quite satisfied with the posters hanging in his apartment but the hair was definitely a big change, even for him.
“You think it looks nice?” He was looking at you from the side of his eye carefully, still fully attempting to keep up his upset facade but you didn’t miss the fact he was fishing for compliments.
You sighed and shifted on your knees so you were a touch closer to him on the couch, used to his dramatics by now but you figured you’d humor him slightly since he could be sensitive at times.
He didn’t say anything when you moved forward but he tensed a bit when your hand was coming up to touch the brightly dyed hair, your eyes widening in slight surprise considering it didn’t feel completely dead. You were running your hand through his thick hair and trying not to think about how unusual it was for you to be so touchy with him, never really being the type of friends who were overly affectionate with each other.
He hugged you on your birthdays and occasionally touched the small of your back when guiding you through a crowded party or event and you were extremely grateful for his lack of contact considering you definitely weren’t oblivious to how attractive your best friend was.
You’d even eventually came to terms with the fact you positively had a crush on him when you’d first met, something you denied to your friends and family back home whenever they picked up on the smile in your voice at the mention of your new friend and inquired for details.
Being friends with Heeseung was more important to you and it was easy to forget how much you had originally liked him if it meant keeping him in your life, even easier considering he never seemed to toe that line that you nearly crossed occasionally the first year or two.
The line you were carefully skating towards right now with your hand in his hair, close enough on the couch to where your knee touched his thigh for just a second before you were scooting your lower half away a bit to avoid the contact. You didn’t take your hand away however but it moved down to his eyebrows instead, smoothing them down with your thumb and remembering he had asked a question when it quirked up as he waited for a response.
“It makes you look more serious.” You mumbled and he still had an expectant look on his face, like he wasn’t quite satisfied with your answer. “Your eyes look more intense now with your dark eyebrows. It’s sort of sexy.”
He snorted a laugh at that and shook his head in denial, realizing you were teasing him and giving him the answers you figured he was looking for.
“Okay but I am serious about it looking nice.” You were smiling as you spoke and he was watching you closely considering you were still gently rubbing his eyebrow with your thumb, retracting your hand after a few seconds and clearing your throat before changing the topic.
The rest of the hangout went as usual, the two of you sitting on your comfortable couch and watching romance movies that were almost comedies when they got too cringy.
You didn’t notice anything different and Heeseung definitely didn’t offer up anymore surprises as big as his bleached hair but something subtly shifted after he left. It took you a few more times seeing him before you noticed he was acting different, lingering around you closer than normal and reaching out to touch the back of your arm whenever he needed to get your attention.
It was so small you barely registered he was doing it until he was back at your apartment the next weekend, coming in with his spare key like normal but instead of going over to your couch and playing on his phone, he was approaching you in the kitchen and watching you for a few seconds silently.
You raised an eyebrow in his direction when you noticed him staring, rolling up your sleeves midway on your arms before going back to cutting up the fruits you’d pulled out for a snack. “What’s up?”
He shrugged at your question and didn’t immediately answer, leaving a weird feeling of confusion in your chest when he was coming closer and touching his arm against yours from how close he was standing. It was much more difficult to ignore than his small casual touching he’d been increasing recently, a lot more intimate than tapping your knee or moving your hair out of your face.
You hurried up to finish cutting before he could do anything weirder and he still wasn’t speaking even when you were shoving the cut up fruits into a bowl and abandoning him near the counter, hurrying onto the couch and glancing back just in time to see him following behind you into the living room.
It was silent for a few more minutes as you started to flip through the explore page of Netflix and you were just starting to relax after his weird demeanor before he was fixing his position on the couch.
You tensed up when he flipped around so he was spread across the expanse of it, moving his body so his head was resting on your thigh and his arm was dangling off the sofa, fingers grazing the carpet gently as he turned to look up at you. “Can you touch my hair again?”
“What?” It slipped from your mouth faster than you even processed his question and he tensed a bit at the harshness of your tone, almost sounding disgusted underneath all of your shock. You felt a wave of guilt for accidentally being rude, taken completely off guard by his request and the fact he was casually laying on you like it was something the two of you did all the time. You relaxed your shoulders to try and show him you weren’t upset and just confused.
“It felt kind of nice when you touched it the other day… I don’t know you don’t have to never mind, forget it.” He was avoiding looking at you now but not taking his head off your lap, most likely too embarrassed to sit back up and rearrange himself again after just doing it a few seconds ago.
His cheek was pressed on your thigh as he stared at the TV despite the fact you weren’t scrolling down the options anymore and there was nothing for him to be looking at. You watched the side of his face for a few moments, following down his sharp jaw and the way the nearly white hairs fell almost over his eyes.
You were sucking in a breath and touching his hair before you could think about it any longer, feeling the way he tensed underneath your sudden touch before immediately relaxing and practically melting into your lap. You started to pick a movie again despite being completely distracted by how much the two of you were touching and if he noticed you were mindlessly clicking things, he didn’t say anything about it.
“Wait… he asked you to pet him?” Sunoo was jaw dropped from where he sat on your bed, watching you rummage through your closet as you ranted to him about the weird moments with Heeseung.
You sighed and shot him a glare because of his weird wording, not responding for a few seconds and squeezing your eyes shut tight when he was letting out a small gasp of shock and scooting forward on his knees.
Three days had passed since you’d last saw your best friend and you had done everything in your power to ignore your growing confusion about the situation, including not telling anybody about it or worsening the situation by getting a second opinion. That only lasted until you opened your front door to see Sunoo’s smiling face, immediately bursting out into confession and asking him for help.
“Okay not to freak you out but this is totally weird.” He was shaking his head now and watching you intensely, opening your eyes to see his equally perplexed expression. “I don’t know if I’ve ever even seen you guys high five before and how he’s practically a dog on your lap?”
“Can you cut that out?” You aggressively threw a shirt in his direction with furrowed eyebrows after his second rude joke slipped from his mouth. He caught the piece of clothing and raised his hands in surrender but you could tell he wasn’t sorry judging by the mischievous look on his face.
You didn’t say anything after that and you felt a deep disappointment in your chest considering Sunoo had left you feeling even more confused about the situation, confirming the fact that it was definitely strange and out of the ordinary.
It didn’t help that the two of you weren’t just looking through your clothes for fun but you were picking out outfits for a small party at a mutual friends house, a party that Heeseung would definitely be attending and looking for you at considering he’d been texting you all afternoon to check in and make sure you were still planning on being there.
Sunoo did his best to lighten the mood but dolling you up and being overly nice the entire way out of your apartment, taking selfies with you in the back of the Uber and purposely avoiding mentioning anything about your best friend.
He was following close behind you once you actually entered the party, feeling slightly anxious considering it was a bigger turn out than what you had been promised over text by the two boys throwing it. You let out a small sigh and scanned through the crowd, habitually looking for Heeseung even though you were still overthinking everything.
It didn’t take you long to find him considering he was one of the taller people there, laughing near the kitchen with some of your friends but you watched as he continuously spared looks towards the doorway like he was waiting for something. A weird warmth washed over you knowing that it was you he was looking for like always, missing you when you’d entered just a few minutes ago.
You tried to ignore the fact that it was completely normal for the two of you to instinctively find each other so there was no reason for the butterflies in your stomach at his attentiveness. Nothing had changed despite the addition of the small touches and you weren’t going to unbury any old feelings for him just because he was acting a bit clingier than usual.
Still, you made your way over to him swiftly, at some point losing Sunoo in the crowd. You weren’t too concerned considering he was the more social out of the two of you, grateful he had at least stuck with you long enough for you to find Heeseung.
You were approaching him and the other boys and they noticed you before he did, smiles on their faces as they started to greet you casually. This caught Heeseung’s attention and he was spinning around quickly to see you, eyes widened in relief and yours opened similarly in surprise when he hands were falling down onto your waist and squeezing softly.
“There you are, I was getting worried.” His words were casual and he didn’t seem to realize the fact you were completely frozen under his touch.
Sunoo had chosen an outfit that left your waist completely bare and although you were growing use to his simple and fleeting touches, you definitely weren’t prepared to feel his warm hands completely covering the expanse of your bare skin. He either didn’t think it was a big deal or he was doing a very good job at pretending, pulling you closer to him so you were standing in front and he was still holding onto you.
You could feel his chest rumbling against your back as he continued to talk with your friends, thumbs absentmindedly stroking your bare sides and squeezing occasionally whenever you slightly shifted.
You were starting to feel slightly crazy and dramatic, like you were the only one making a big deal out of nothing and overthinking stuff that had no meaning behind it. It wasn’t until you were meeting eyes with one of your friends Jake that you considered the opposite, seeing the way he was looking at curiously before his eyes were dropping down to the big hands holding onto you borderline possessively.
He met your gaze again before quirking up an eyebrow in question, eyes creasing into a small chuckle when you were shrugging and giving him a bewildered look to showcase you also thought it was strange.
Heeseung must have noticed the silent exchange because he was faltering in his words for a second before tugging you back tighter against his chest, clearing his throat over the surprised sound you let out at the sudden jerking movement.
You froze for a few seconds before you were taking a step or two out of his embrace. “I need to go to the bathroom really quick.”
“Do you want me to come with you?” He was rushing it out before he even seemed to realize he was saying it and the rest of the group paused awkwardly at the random offer, completely out of character for him.
You froze with them before quickly gathering yourself and shaking your head in denial, starting to stutter out a reason before giving up and turning around so you could rush away from the awkward situation.
Thankfully the bathroom down the hallway wasn’t occupied and you quickly entered it and locked the door, placing your hands on the cold countertop and taking deep breaths to try and calm your nerves down. You’d already been overthinking the situation and having it confirmed that it wasn’t just you noticing things were changing was positively freaking you out, wondering if he had somehow found out about your feelings for him.
You were glancing up at yourself in the mirror and sighing at the stressed out look on your face, splashing some cold water on your cheeks to bring you back to your senses before you were fixing your hair and opening the door.
You were stopped in your tracks considering somebody was standing directly outside of it, peering down at you with a slightly surprised expression because of the speed in which you swung the door open. He was taking a step back with a small smirk when he steadied himself, letting you pass but not making any moves to head into the bathroom himself.
“Is there a reason you followed me over here Jake or were you just creepily standing outside the door.” Your tone was exhausted when you turned back to look at him and he didn’t seem at all shocked that you spoke to him rather than walking away.
“Just wondering what’s going on with you and Heeseung.” He was shrugging casually but he had a mischievous look in his eyes that you didn’t really trust.
Being friends with Jake was fun and casual, he showed up to events and made them louder and looser but he’d also been there for you countless times when you needed help and weren’t sure who to call, not wanting to constantly bother Heeseung with your problems. Jake was particularly useful when your problems were about Heeseung, letting you drunkenly rant a handful of times about your past feelings for him.
But that didn’t make it any less annoying that he was clearly trying to meddle with the situation, whatever it was. You sighed and took a few steps in his direction, pointing a finger onto his chest and giving him your best attempt at a glare.
“Don’t say anything to him about it, whatever it is will pass and we will all forget about it.” You were trying to sound stern and intimidating but he was still looking down at you with slight amusement, eyes dropping down to your finger on his chest for a second before meeting your eyes again.
“If I told you that I knew, would you want to know?” He was saying suddenly with a raised eyebrow and you froze in place.
“Are you implying that you know why Heeseung is acting so weird towards me?” Your eyes turned down into a glare but he didn’t seem at all intimidated by the threatening tone you’d taken on, smiling down at you and shrugging again like he wasn’t holding crucial information to the most important friendship in your life.
“Maybe I do, maybe I don’t.” He was clearly teasing you and your frustration grew, making a small angry noise and pushing your palm against his chest instead of just the tip of your finger. “Okay okay fine. All I can say is maybe think about something you did that might have made him realize he-“
Your eyes were widening as you listened to him intensely, nodding to try and encourage him to continue once he slowly trailed off in his sentence. You weren’t sure why he stopped talking until you heard a throat clearing from the end of the hallway, turning your head swiftly to see Heeseung standing there and looking at the two of you.
He had a strange expression on his face, one you weren’t quite used to seeing and it took you a few seconds to realize it was anger. He rarely ever was angry, especially around you and you were completely thrown off by the dark way he was looking at you.
Jake seemed to understand the reason for it faster than you and he shifted back awkwardly, getting impossibly closer to the wall. He couldn’t really move away from you much but the slight movement was enough for you to realize what a compromise position the two of you looked like you were in. Your hand was still on his chest from your anger earlier and you were unusually close to him, staring up at him encouragingly.
Your mouth was parting to try and explain that it wasn’t what it looked like but there was no point considering Heeseung was shaking his head and turning to leave, the flashing lights of the party in the living room behind him illuminated his face just enough for you to see the upset clenching of his jaw.
You didn’t bother saying goodbye to Jake, following after your friend quickly even when he was pushing through the crowd and heading back outside.
By the time you managed to get out there he was stuffing his phone into his pocket and standing on the sidewalk near the road, shiny now from the rain that had fallen during the party. He was crossing his arms and you frowned slightly at how cold and annoyed he looked before you were taking a small breath and approaching him.
“Did you get a ride?” You asked him softly and he didn’t seem at all startled by the sound of your voice, barely sparing you a glance out of the side of his eye before giving a curt nod.
You mirrored the movement of his head in understanding awkwardly but you had a small pit in your stomach considering he wasn’t even looking at you, obviously upset about something you didn’t quite understand. It was rare you and Heeseung fought and even more rare that he was genuinely mad at you and not just bickering about something stupid.
He was keeping up his stony demeanor even when you sniffled slightly from the cold and rubbed your hands on your bare arms to try and warm them up a bit.
Eventually you were wobbling sideways while trying to adjust your standing position and you leaned onto him slightly for support, your skin brushing his for a few seconds before you were quickly standing upright and mumbling an apology into the tensed silence. He didn’t say anything still but you spared him another glance and tensed up seeing he was staring at you now, a weird expression on his face.
You were thinking about asking him if he was feeling okay until he was reaching over and touching your arm softly, ignoring the small surprised noise you made and tugging you over so you were stood in front of him again, the same position he had put you in back in the kitchen.
“What are you…” You trailed off when he was caging his arms around you and rubbing softly on your bare skin like you had been a few moments ago, warming you up immediately but also pressing you entirely against him.
Your next few breaths came out shaky and if he noticed he didn’t say anything, standing there like that with you held against him until the car was pulling up. He held the door open for you and scooted inside next to you until his thigh was pressed against yours, taking up the middle seat despite having plenty of room to sit on his own.
A guilty feeling was eating at you again for being so hyper aware of everything he was doing lately. Maybe he had always been this touchy and you just didn’t notice it because you were so preoccupied with denying your feelings for him and keeping your friendship as a priority.
You were watching the side of his face and thinking about this when you started to change your mind. He wasn’t exactly acting normal either despite being the one to start casually touching you.
Heeseung was avoiding looking at you most the time, almost like he knew you’d be giving him that confused stare you’d carried consistently the last few days. It didn’t help that your friend group had also seemed completely thrown off by the way he was acting and that wasn’t nearly as intimate as the way he treated you when you were alone together. He cleared his throat and snapped you out of your daze, diverting your eyes off of him and opting to stare out the front window instead.
You hoped your face didn’t flush too noticeably when he started to stare at you instead, feeling his gaze just as prominent as his leg pressed against yours.
——
It wasn’t unusual for Heeseung to follow you out of the Uber, it wasn’t out of place for him to be standing behind you silently while you nervously dug your keys out of your bag and unlocked your front door.
All these typical things were only unnerving you because of the new added factor, the heavy tension sitting between the two of you now. You glanced behind you right before you turned the doorknob and met eyes with him for a few seconds, knowing he felt it too for sure now and having no more doubts about if he was purposefully acting different.
You pushed the door open and kicked off your shoes, the two of you going about your usual routine of changing into more comfortable clothes, him having his own section in your closest and drawer in your dresser. It was the same as always except for the thick silence, replacing the usual laughter and banter that filled the rooms.
You took a deep breath before leaving your room in shorts and one of Heeseung’s shirts now, pausing in the doorway when he left the bathroom across the hall at the exact same time.
“So-“
“Are you-“
The two of you froze up when you started to speak together. You gave him a small awkward smile before gesturing your hand in his direction to indicate you wanted him to go first, hugging your arms across your stomach when he nodded to try and calm down your nerves.
“Are you and Jake a thing now?” He was asking in a flat tone but you could tell he was still upset from the party, avoiding looking at you directly and clenching his jaw again.
“You’re seriously asking me that right now?” A disbelieving laugh slipped from your mouth at the end of the sentence and this seemed to frustrate him even more, looking at you finally with heat behind his eyes. You shook your head and touched your mouth softly in shock, realizing he genuinely thought that’s what he had seen.
You turned around to go back into your bedroom, assuming he’d follow even though you were clearly thrown off by what he was saying.
He did exactly that and he stood near your desk when you sat down on the bed carefully, watching you and waiting for you to offer an explanation. You didn’t like how intimidating he looked, something you’d never thought about him before, and you slightly felt like you were being interrogated even though he was the one being weird.
“Of course I’m not dating Jake.” You really stressed the words to make him understand but he gave you a disbelieving look, causing a scoff to be pulled from your lips. “I was only in the hallway with him because he was wondering why you were acting so weird.”
It slipped out before you even realized you were saying it and he tensed up at the same time you paused. His eyebrow quirked up in question and you stared at him in embarrassment, knowing you’d have no choice to explain what you had been noticing.
“How am I acting weird?” He proved you right by asking you that but his tone was stiff and it sounded like he already knew the answer without you even needing to say it.
“I don’t know you’re just…. you’re just being different.” You were playing with your hands anxiously and trying to avoid looking at him.
It didn’t help that he was still standing over you and seemed completely thrown off and distant now that you’d brought attention to his behavior. He must have figured you didn’t notice and he was getting away with it, letting out a deep sigh and shaking his head softly.
You stared at him now despite feeling overly awkward, watching the way his movement caused his bright bleached hair to fall into his face and cover his eyes again. Your mouth pulled into a frown softly and you were standing up before he had time to process it, reaching over and pushing his hair back with your hand.
He didn’t say anything as you touched him gently, revealing his forehead again and making sure he didn’t poke himself in the eyes with the ends of his hair.
It was making the situation ten times more confusing for the both of you but you’d already crossed those invisible boundaries multiple times already and you were sick of how high the frustrated tension was, figuring you might as well take this opportunity to be close to him in ways you hadn’t gotten a chance to before.
“I don’t want to fight with you.” He was whispering and your eyes fell from his hair down to hold his gaze, seeing how his hardened expression had practically melted into one of guilt and regret. “It makes me feel terrible, I hate it so much.”
“Then let’s not fight.” You mumbled back to him, keeping your volume low in the delicate air. Your hand was still touching his hair and you softly put some of the longer pieces behind his ear, letting it drop afterwards to land on his shoulder for a few seconds. You gave it a gentle reassuring squeeze before you were stepping away from him again in preparation to sit back on the bed.
His body automatically followed yours like you had a magnet connected to you, taking a step forward to match the one you took back. He didn’t even seem to realize he was doing it, just naturally trying to keep close to you.
You watched him for a few beats to see if he was going to back away and apologize, realize that he was acting strange considering you’d just had a conversation about it. Strangely, he seemed completely clueless to why you had paused and cocked his head to the side like he was asking for an explanation. You waited for a bit more, deciding between two ways you could handle this and eventually landing on the one that caused you to take a deep breath before speaking.
“Did you want to lay with me?” Your voice was coming out fast and strong but your stomach was almost hurting with how nervous you felt, not sure at all where the line had moved to and how far was too far.
His eyes widened at your question and for a moment he seemed to realize how close you were standing for no reason, weird enough that you were even standing in your room in the first place instead of casually lounging around your apartment.
“Like.. in your bed?” He was finally responding after what felt like ten years and you nodded before you changed your mind, shrugging bashfully after like it wasn’t a big deal to you despite the fact you felt almost dizzy at the idea of laying with him.
You took a step to the side so you could move without bumping into him and he watched as you climbed onto your bed awkwardly, scooting to the far left so the side closest to him was available and tucking yourself underneath your big blanket. He was just watching you in bewilderment and you felt a bit stupid suddenly, having just assumed he’d want to lay with you because how touchy he’d been.
“You don’t have to never mind, it’s stupid anyways.” You laughed softly at the end of your mumbled sentence but it didn’t come across as genuine at all, scooting awkwardly on your side more so you didn’t have to face him directly.
Before you were able to look away from him he was quickly snapping out of it at the sound of your retraction, shaking his head quickly and landing on the bed with his knees before you could shut him out further. You tensed as he climbed into the bed next to you and pulled the blanket up so he could get underneath, avoiding looking at your bare legs for the few seconds they were visible before he was lowering it.
The two of you laid side by side for a few minutes in silence and you were quickly regretting asking him to join you considering how awkward it was.
You could hear him breathing, heavily at first almost like he was winded and then calmer the longer you stayed like that. You’d rolled back over fully onto your back eventually and your shoulder bumped into his, settling down into a position that made it so your arms were touching.
It was hard not to wonder what he was thinking about, if he was thinking about anything. Your mind was overflowing with too much confusion but it was completely possible that he was just laying next to you because you had asked and he wasn’t putting as much meaning behind it as you did so instinctively.
Then you felt something pressing against your wrist, flinching away for a second thinking it was a bug or something before your brain registered the warmth of Heeseung’s fingers pressing against your skin softly. You lowered your arm back onto the bed and thankfully he didn’t seem to be deterred by your sudden movement, sliding his hand down your wrist until he could lace his fingers with yours.
A wave of relief washed over you suddenly, silent confirmation that this wasn’t just two friends laying in bed together.
You felt like your breath had caught in your throat and you absentmindedly squeezed his hand, a sigh of relief being heard from beside you. His thumb was rubbing over the back of your palm and you were fighting the urge to look over at him and see what his expression was like.
“You can say no but..” His voice was coming out low and your head snapped in his direction at the sound of it. He wasn’t looking at you, staring straight up at the ceiling with an almost pained expression. “Would it be weird if.. could I hold you maybe?”
His words lingered in the air and your mouth parted in shock, something he must’ve sensed considering his hand tensed in yours and immediate regret passed over his face.
You didn’t want him to pull away from you just yet so you were acting quickly before you’d fully processed what he was asking and how strange it was. You rolled back onto your side, facing completely away from him and for a second you wondered if his heart dropped thinning you were upset with him for asking you.
Then you were scooting backwards in his direction and glancing over your shoulder waiting for him to take the hint, meeting his gaze finally and watching as understanding passed through his eyes. You quickly looked away, face flushing almost uncomfortably hot and it only worsened when his arm was hesitantly draping over your waist.
He was slow at first, like he was testing to see if you’d push him off or change your mind but when he seemingly decided it was safe he got bolder.
A small surprised noise slipped out of you when he was tugging you back tighter against him, his front completely against you and you felt him tucking his head into the crook of your neck. He breathed in a low sigh of relief and tightened his arm that was around you, instinctively squeezing like he’d finally gotten a breath of fresh air.
You were thinking back to what Jake had said now for the first time since it had happen just a few hours ago, the boy hinting that you had done something that awoken a new side of your best friend.
You wrestled with the idea that Heeseung was potentially touched starved before you ran your fingers through his newly bleached hair so softly, recalling the way his eyes had widened as he absentmindedly leaned into your touched like he was mesmerized by it. It made more sense to you with every passing second now considering the way he was holding onto you so tightly, like he was afraid you’d slip away from him.
“Is it too weird?” He was muttering from behind you and you shivered at the feeling of his breath on your neck.
You were shaking your head and trying to clear your throat to respond to him but you found yourself unable to form any words, overly aware of how close you were and the fact his hand was fanned out against your side.
To make matters worse he started to move again, clearly not content with just holding you against him. His hand was shifting against you and pulling at the large tshirt you were wearing, pausing for a second when he realized it was his but not saying anything about it. At first you were confused with what he was attempting to do but he pulled it up so it was resting near your ribs, leaving your stomach exposed.
You could tell he was propping himself up slightly behind you considering his face wasn’t tucked into your neck anymore and you felt overwhelmingly shy knowing he was looking at your bare skin, his large hand tracing down the dip of your waist and watching the way goosebumps rose to the surface.
Heeseung had seen you in lots of states of undress, walking in on you changing a dozen times and seeing you in bathing suits more than you could count but it felt miles more intimate in your current situation.
You glanced behind your shoulder again at him to find him already looking at you, a look in his eyes that was too loaded for you to want to unpack it right now.
Thankfully he laid back down and shifted his position, tapping you so you could lift your body off the bed a bit and he could slide his arm underneath you. This made it so he was completely hugging you around the middle and because he had tugged your shirt up his hands were left resting on your bare stomach.
Despite the heavy touching and the way he was watching you a few seconds ago, it didn’t feel sexual at all. If anything you almost felt like you could cry from how innocent and intimate the whole situation was. You realized you’d been just as desperate to touch him despite instinctively running from him in fear of what it meant.
Or more realistically, what it didn’t mean for him.
Regardless if he felt the same way as you did, if his heart was beating out of his chest with love and longing that had been buried down deep since you’d first heard him laugh, it definitely meant something important to the both of you.
He was tucking his face back into your neck, moving your hair to the side so he could hook his chin over your shoulder and you could feel his heart beat against your back, anything but still. You placed your hands shakily over his that remained still and warm on your stomach, stroking his knuckles softly and letting yourself stop thinking just for a moment.
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Being Their Friend
TW: Breakdowns/crises (mentioned), knives, swearing, centipedes, bullying, general mental health stuff, Zooble's limbs being (painlessly) moved/stored/body horror
Type: Headcanons
A/N: Hi. These are just for fun; don't get up in arms if they aren't perfect (they can't be anyway, considering how far into the show we are). Requests aren't open (EDIT: they are open now). Spoilers obviously. Includes only the main six because I honestly don't know enough about Caine yet.
Pomni
Being her friend entails a multitude of existential crises. Everyone's trying to find their own way to cope, but expect to be helping her through many a panic attack. She's a hot mess most of the time, and doesn't really know what to do.
As seen in the trailer, she still gets scared of getting hurt, much unlike people like Ragatha who know they can't be harmed by knives or whatever else Caine throws at them. It'd be your job to help calm her down during these situations and help her adjust to not being hurt.
Other than that, I imagine once Pomni gets (semi) used to living in the digital circus you'd spend a lot of time looking for the exit. She definitely wants to get out of there before she becomes abstracted--something she knows is possible with her mental state. She also just wants to get her and everyone else out of there. Even that jackass Jax.
Pomni would take a lot of comfort in the things that connect her to the real world like food. If she offers you some food, you know you're really friends with her. If she had access to drawing/painting equipment or whatnot, I reckon she'd try to draw herself in her real form (if she could remember). She's like to see what you look like, and would compliment you on your appearance.
Ragatha
Ragatha's been in the digital circus for a while, and is much more comfortable with it than some of her other friends (or so she likes to pretend). She's fine with getting hit with knives as seen in her introduction short and likely wouldn't be scared of dying by anything else. As she said, her only fear is centipedes.
Still, it'll be your job to get them out of her room for her. Everyone knows what an arsehole Jax can be, and she sure as hell isn't risking walking into her room to find tens of thousands of them. If you don't do it, she's staying in your room for an indefinite amount of time.
Actually, I think Ragatha would like to have sleepovers anyway. It'd keep her impending thoughts at bay. Even if she doesn't require sleep, it's fun and reminds her of home. Like I said in Pomni's section, I think she'd enjoy drawing or painting. Or any creative visual art really, but especially drawing and painting for the purpose of making pictures of what you look like outside of the digital world.
Though be warned, the sight of her may send her off on a spiral of homesickness. Since Ragatha serves as a kind of rock of stability (as best as her overly optimistic self can), seeing her collapse may cause the others to collapse, too. Except maybe Jax, but it'll be up to you to try and get everyone back together before abstraction happens.
Jax
First of all, I don't know if this is possible. Not only are we so little into the show to really know, but Gooseworx also said he's going to have some really bad scenes. So, I suppose you won the lottery in doing this...Maybe. It really depends on how you look at it.
Because first of all, he's still a massive dick. He's just rude to everyone, so expect nothing different. He'll still be a jerk to you, "prank" you, or really, just straight up bully you. Honestly, half the time you can't even tell this guy is supposed to like you. He doesn't even really say sorry unless it's sarcastic.
The only way you can tell he likes you as a friend is when he gets all up in arms about you being annoyed at him. At first, at least, he's confused as to why you can't just let it go. Over time, though, he gets more in tune with his emotions and starts to mellow out a little.
However, it does come with the perk of having someone who will beat the ever-loving life out of whoever hurt you. Okay, well, not that far--he's got to keep his reputation as someone who doesn't care about other people, so he'll at most just be a bit of a bigger pain in their side. But it's still there.
Things you'd do together include terrorising the other members (or, he tries to get you in on it, anyway), sneaking into people's rooms to snoop around, and all-in-all just being a bit of a pain. But you also do other things; he seems like he's not one for visual arts or theatre, but maybe he could play an instrument and may--very heavy on the "may"--teach you some stuff. Otherwise, I don't think he's an arts guy. He'd enjoy video games, though, if they had those! And going to the digital carnival for thrills along with just exploring the grounds.
Kinger
Kinger would be an interesting friend. I have two routes for this guy based on a theory I saw. Route one follows him actually being on the brink of insanity/abstraction. In this route, you have to make sure he's alright. Just be gentle with him and check up on him every now and then. But don't be in his face all the time. Everyone needs a bit of personal space.
You can still hang out with Kinger, obviously. You can still talk about things you'd normally talk about, whatever that may be. Just don't bring up the abstracted queen (who I shall be calling Queener). It'll bring up some...Bad memories.
Anyways, my second route is this: based on a theory, Kinger is actually one of the more stable ones in the group, and is just pretending to be on the brink of losing it. Basically, if I remember right, he's pretending in order to get out of the activities/shenanigans of the group.
But no matter what his reason for doing it is, he's smart as hell. Having tricked everyone, it'd take a keen eye to figure it out. If you do, he'd be impressed. Once he trusts you enough, the two of you will discuss the other circus members and how to outsmart them secretly. You'll also just hang out, gossip...He feels like a guy who'd be into drama, with his whole being the actual king thing. You two would do some impromptu skits and whatnot to pass the time.
Gangle
Oh, Gangle. What would you do with Gangle? Well, you'd certainly have to be gentle with her. She's a very fragile soul--and also fragile physically--and needs some care. Help her repair her mask, or better yet, stop Jax from breaking it in the first place. In fact, just stop him from doing any mean stuff to her in the first place.
Other than that, Gangle is someone who'd actually enjoy drawing as a hobby and not just a memories thing. She draws anime, and would make you and her anime personas with cool abilities and features like wings and shit. I imagine her art style is very early-mid 2000s anime, with the really big eyes and whatnot.
Anyways, I reckon she'd also write. Mostly fanfiction when she wasn't stuck in the digital world, but since there's no fandoms to write about now she'd start branching out into her own original stories. But don't get me wrong; if anyone was going to write about their friends and fellow members it'd be her. She just hides it somewhere other than her room. Gangle would like to write stories about your sonas going on adventures and saving the world.
Eventually, these stories probably get found by Jax or someone else (but probably Jax). He'd laugh his arse off at them and would run to tell everyone about it. Unless you can absolutely beat the shit out of him, prepare to do some explaining and also comforting for her.
Zooble
Zooble does not give much of a shit about the others. They wouldn't let them die (at least I think so), but they're in no way buddy-buddy with them. In order to be friends with them, you'd have to meet their strict criteria. So, good job on that!
Being friends with them would either involve lots of gossip because they want to talk shit about people and complain, or it'd have no gossip because they honestly couldn't care less about the others. I can't tell. But if you do gossip, I imagine they know a lot about the other members. You'd be filled in on everything they know, too. They've been dying for someone to tell this too.
Zooble's also very particular about their looks, as seen in their introductory short. They have many stored limbs and whatnot to swap around for their mood. Don't mess with their body by switching around their antennae-like things or ripping off their body parts like Jax. They will retaliate.
Going off of this, though, I imagine they're pretty strong. I mean, they choked Jax like that. So, if anyone (him) comes around to piss you off, you best bet they'll be on their way to beat his arse. Though, it probably ends in a tug-of-war with one of their arms.
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SINGING LOW (teaser)
18+ / mdi
summary: despite everyone within the industry knowing mingyu to date around a lot, what didn't meet the public's eye was his undying crush on you, his label mate, and his need to fill the you-shaped hole in his heart with any girl who'd give him the time of day.
content: idol!mingyu x hybeidol!reader, pining, mingyu's kind of a slut, smut, afab reader, reader is a 97 liner, dry humping, a lot of made up shit abt the industry lmao, mentions of other idols, oral sex (f and m receiving), penetrative sex, angst, fluff, etc.
(^ no actual content warnings in the teaser)
wc: 1.7k (teaser) 13k (full fic)
FULL FIC HERE
Or you can check it out on my ko-fi today by subscribing here and going on the fic here
a/n: this is not connected to my lil idol!mingyu x idol!reader series just fyi <3 also i decided to open a ko-fi!! (stop booing me pls T-T) here's a link to the details! anyways hope u enjoy this ive been thinking of this trope for a while <33
masterlist
Mingyu could still remember the day he met you. Well, maybe not met, but it was the first time he ever saw you face to face. It was at some awards show back in 2017. MAMA, was it? Or maybe the MMAs? Well, that didn't matter much. All he knew is that on stage, you had caught his eye.
It was only about a year into his debut, so he still wasn't too used to this scene. He simply sat back and enjoyed the pretty sight in front of him, knowing your group (and you) by name, but not having had the pleasure of meeting you personally by then. He hadn't met many people thus far, actually. At the time, most of his friends in the industry consisted of the twelve other members of his group. Coming from a small company, it had been hard for any of the members to begin to disperse and befriend their peers in the industry. Sure, they all had friendly acquaintances with other idols, but nothing could really compare to what they had with one another.
It wasn't until somewhere around 2017 that Mingyu had finally found a group of friends outside of his twelve members that he could trust. He had always been an outgoing guy, befriending anyone who'd look his way. He reasoned that someone had to be the icebreaker in every social situation, and he had given himself that job. Despite being a charismatic extrovert, however, most of these friendships did not stick. He developed many acquaintances, and maybe even situational friendships, but he had not really considered anyone a friend until meeting one Jeon Jungkook.
Jeon Jungkook was simply the tip of the iceberg. Some believed Mingyu had taken the man under his wing, while others believed the opposite, but it had in fact been a mutual aid. They had both felt a bit lost at the time they met, bonding over the many things their lives had in common. Their age being one of them. At first it was thrown around as a joke, the idea of forming a little group with the many other 97-liners within their industry. But that joke became reality soon after when Mingyu had met Yugyeom backstage during his group's most recent comeback at the time. The three soon became four, taking in a Cha Eunwoo, and then a Jaehyun from NCT. Even some of Mingyu's own members joining, having the privilege of being born on the great year of 1997. This was how you eventually entered the picture.
Mingyu had already known you, well, more so known about you. Despite being the same age, you had debuted a couple of years before Seventeen, which gave him the opportunity to get to know you as an idol before he did personally. He still remembered the days in the green basement, watching comeback shows with the members as they prepared for their own debut. There had been a specific day when your group had been presenting their newest comeback, which was also the day Mingyu first caught sight of you. You had caught his eye immediately. There was just something about you. He might've developed a slight interest in you from that moment on, hoping for the day in which he would become one of your peers.
Upon debuting, Mingyu had only seen you in passing for the first few years, the closest contact being a quick and informal introduction between your groups as you cruised through the backstage hallways of MNET. You looked even better in real life, he had to admit. But sadly, there was no one-on-one interaction between you that day. Nor was there during any of the following encounters throughout the next few years. It wasn't until a few years into the creation of the 97 squad that Mingyu had the pleasure of meeting you personally.
It was sometimes Jungkook who brought in new members to the friend group, but it was mostly Mingyu who would take the liberty of befriending the aforementioned members in order to introduce them into the group. It was mostly due to Mingyu's extroverted personality, which allowed him to strike up conversation with anyone at any time, unlike Jungkook who was a bit shier in that aspect. It had been Jungkook, however, who had first introduced the two of you. It had been backstage of MAMA or MMA, he wasn't completely sure. Mingyu also wasn't sure how you and Jungkook had met; he'd never bothered to ask, but upon your first meeting it had seemed like the two of you were close friends already. Mingyu had to admit that upon that first assumption, he was a bit jealous of his proximity to you. This was immediately followed by the realization that maybe Mingyu's previous infatuation in you went further than mere interest in you as a fellow idol, but it was maybe a bit of a crush. Regardless of what Mingyu had felt at the moment, he knew that he wanted to see you again.
For some unknown reason, you were not present in the following 97 gathering soon after your introduction. This struck Mingyu as strange, seeing as you were also a 97, and a friend of Jungkook's, so why would you not be present? It was soon after revealed to Mingyu that you had yet to be offered a spot in the now renown 97 squad. Jungkook had assessed that all the dating rumors that would come attached to the inclusion of a girl in the group were simply not worth it. He wanted to save you both the headache and the scandal. It seemed like a pretty reasonable decision. Mingyu, however, was not the most reasonable of people, often allowing his decision-making to be led by impulse rather than calculated choices. Which was why Mingyu had found himself walking up to you next time he spotted you at yet another comeback show, promptly asking you if you'd like to meet some of his friends sometime in the following week, claiming it was tradition for all 97s to go for a drink every other week. He felt like he was inviting you to join into a cult, or at least that's what you said to him it had felt like. But you had still agreed, giving him your number so that you could be privy to the details of the meeting.
Your admission to the friend group came very naturally, having already met a few of the members and easily befriending the rest. Yes, it had come with some controversy at first, but Mingyu had come to learn that you were quite strong-minded, not allowing a few rumors to get in the way of your personal life. It was easy for the two of you to grow close after that. Despite having befriended the entirety of the group, you and Mingyu seemed to form a more special bond, even seeking each other's company outside of group gatherings. It was all platonic, of course. Mingyu had quickly realized you did not seem interested in that way, so he tucked his crush deep within him, choosing to offer a friendship to you instead, never speaking of his crush to anyone. This was how the two of you came to become best friends.
This repression of his feelings, however, did not come without its consequences.
Mingyu was a hopeless romantic at heart. This meant that his crush never really went away. It actually worsened over the years that he knew you. But you never acted like anything other than a friend to him. You would always treat him the same way you did Jaehyun or Eunwoo. He was just another one of the members of the friend group to you. Yes, you two were closer in nature – calling each other the best of friends within the industry – but Mingyu did not want to risk that closeness just because of a selfish crush.
The repression of his feelings was also met with other things. Mingyu was a very loving man. He needed to express his love to everyone around him or he would physically explode (Okay, not really, but he swore that's what it felt like to him). He had a loving family to tend to by taking care of them financially and spending every waking minute away from work with. He had his thirteen best friends to shower with playful affection during and out of work. He had his 97-liners to play around with in between work schedules. What he did not have, however, was that one person who was his and only his. Someone to give the type of love that you reserve for only that one special person in your life.
Mingyu found himself seeking this person out since the beginning of time. Many would call Mingyu a womanizer or a player due to the high volume of relationships he had been involved in during his life. It wasn't like that, however. Not at all. Mingyu would date a girl he liked, would be happy with her, but would ultimately realize that the spark he was looking for was not there, causing him to regrettably end the relationship. He was often met with curses directed his way, but he felt it was best to try and end it amicably if he did not see a future there.
His most recent relationship had been with a former staff member. She was funny and sweet, and also pretty easy on the eyes. They got along very well when she first got assigned to Mingyu as part of his personal team. It started as a friendship, but it didn't take long for Mingyu's hopeless romantic tendencies to seek her out in a romantic way, something to which she obviously agreed to immediately. Mingyu had no issue getting women on his side. He had never dealt with rejection all his life. Being handsome, talented, funny, and even rich from a young age, it was rare to be met with anything but enthusiastic responses left and right. The relationship did not end amicably, however. Mingyu should've known better than to date someone who technically worked for him. I mean, he had been through this before (with one stylist, one MNET staff member, and a former Pledis recruiter to be specific), so he should've known by now that mixing business with pleasure was a bad idea. But his romantic tendencies couldn't be helped. He had too much love to give, and no one to give it to.
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˚୨୧ 。 ˚ IT WAS A NIGHT TO REMEMBER . — osamu dazai
⟢ SYNOPSIS. after a long week of work, you and your best friend retreat to a bar to distract yourself from your responsibilities. however, you find it unfulfilling and decide you need to just go home. as you head out the door, you bump into someone more than familiar.
a/n. it’s the way i immediately thought of him when i first heard this song. <3
info. fem!reader. exes to lovers!au. we have the full recipe…fluff; light angst; gets really sugg. mentions of drinking; scars. your best friend hates dazai. hc dazai doesn’t bandage his tummy. (ᗒᗜᗕ) ノ wc. 3.6k
“It’s just a lot.”
You just finished the final shift of your job for the week, and you were more than exhausted and burnt out. You had called your best friend immediately after to get some comfort, and despite how busy she was, she agreed to meet you for some drinks and listen to you rant.
“My coworker’s getting on my last nerve,” you continued venting. You had already told her about select crappy people you had to interact with during the day and then your boss, who regarded you with no empathy whatsoever. “Today’s already been bad enough, and then she decides to just pile more stress on me.”
You swished the ice around your emptied glass, creating clanking sounds while coating the cup in water.
“Maybe you should just quit,” your friend replied, taking a sip out of her glass. “I would’ve been long gone if I had to deal with annoying people all around, nine to five.”
She looked up at you. “Besides, you’re well off anyway. I don’t see why you’re working. Are you…trying to distract yourself?”
You sighed. She knew you too well.
“Love, don’t tell me you’re still hung up over—“
“It’s not what you think,” you cut her off, yet you avoided eye contact. It was easier to lie that way. “I just feel I’d have too much free time on my hands. I’m not sure what I’d do with it.”
You let out a dry chuckle. That wasn’t wholly false in itself, either. At your age, everyone had their own things going on—your best friend being an example. Therefore, you couldn’t find much time to go out with any of your friends, and you weren’t interested in meeting new people either.
You could blame your job. Perhaps the ones you meet every day put a sour taste on your tongue, making you lose any desire to interact with strangers. You could blame your exhaustion. Or…
“Honestly, I think that calls for someone new in your life,” your friend replied. “That’ll surely cure your boredom.”
“No thanks. I don’t feel like dating anyone right now.”
“I’m just kidding,” she laughed. “But it’d help you feel less lonely, no?”
“…you didn’t believe my answer to your earlier question, huh?”
“No. Of course not.”
It had been over five months since you broke up with your boyfriend. You tried seeing people after that, but in truth, you were only using them to try to move on.
Once you realized that it wasn’t working and it wasn’t fair for others to play with feelings, you decided to take on a new job on the other side of the city so you’d still get out of your house and have a change of scene.
“…But you know what? Screw him. I will keep saying again and again, I hate that man. Suicidal maniac. I know it’s hard, but you’re too hot to keep dwelling on this. You need to learn to move o—”
Your friend’s phone suddenly buzzed, interrupting her little lecture.
She picked it up, and you waited for her to finish speaking.
“I’m sorry, I think I got to go. I left my boyfriend with my cat, and he just told me he lost her already…” she shook her head. “Have you gotten out everything you wanted to say?”
“Yeah, thanks,” you replied. “I think I’ll go home soon, too. Not really feeling it.”
She stood up, handing you a bill with a smile. “Drinks on me tonight. Don’t complain—I’m sorry I couldn’t stay longer. And we didn’t order much anyway.”
“That’s okay; I appreciate you coming to listen to me anyway,” you replied.
“The offer is still open, by the way! If you want to find someone, I’ll schedule a date by this weekend.”
You rolled your eyes. “Whatever. Thanks.”
…
You only had one more drink before you decided to leave, still mostly sober—you figured it’d just be best if you’d take care of yourself at home.
Another thing your job was also distracting you from was witnessing all the relationships around you. Your friend had to go home for her boyfriend. You noticed a few couples at the bar you were at. You’d probably see more when you walked outside.
Not that you minded, is what you tried to tell yourself every single time. You didn’t have to be with someone. It’s okay to have a break.
But was it okay to still have a particular person at the back of your head all the time?
You stood up, leaving the bill and tip for your bartender before you walked toward the door. Opening it caused the bell attached to it to jingle. You were greeted by a cool, night breeze—and someone’s torso.
“O-Oh, sorry,” you replied, too tired to even catch the face of the person you bumped into.
But you had no choice when the man didn’t move out of the doorframe to walk in or allow you to pass.
So, when you met the almost-surprised, caramel-kissed eyes on a face framed with dark brown bangs and wavy hair, you felt your heart plunge into your stomach.
You whispered his name—almost scared to say it, the syllables feeling foreign from not having spoken it aloud for months.
“…Osamu.”
He was halfway through saying your name when you dashed for the exit, shoving him aside and speed-walking out.
“Wait! Bel—“ he caught himself and shouted your name once more.
You started walking down the parking lot, unsure of where you were trying to go, except away—away from Dazai. You had forgotten this bar was in the heart of the city. You didn’t know Dazai came to this one, but you knew his work was somewhere close.
“Hey!” you felt a breeze behind your back, and then a hand gently land on your shoulder, stopping you in your tracks.
“What…why are you following me?”
You turned around, getting your second full view of your ex for the night.
His hair was a bit longer. He still had those bandages on his neck—did he bother to change them out recently? His scent was as still as you remembered—grassy and toasty, a resemblance to green tea.
“I’m not sure why I’d leave a girl I know to walk alone at night,” he shrugged. “It’s dangerous!”
You continued walking, not responding to his reply.
“Where are we going?”
“Who’s we?”
“Aw, that was really rude.”
You ignored Dazai, making sure your stroll stayed a few feet in front of him.
You then entered a park, him trailing behind you.
“Why were you at the bar alone?”
“That’s none of your business.” You walked down the path, trees casting dark shadows onto the grass under the moon’s light.
“…And I wasn’t alone the entire time. I was with a friend, but she left to attend something.”
Dazai nodded, trying to catch up to your face. You immediately gave him more than enough space when he reached you, not wanting any invasion of your personal space.
“But you usually don’t drink unless you’re either celebrating or stressed,” he said. “And from what I’ve seen, it looks like the latter.”
You stopped again. “Again, it’s none of your business. Maybe you should focus on yours. You go and drink tons when you’re stressed, too.”
“Hey, I’ve actually gotten better at that…”
“You still ended up at a bar midweek.”
“But I didn’t even go in, no? I’m with you at a park right now.”
You were silent once again. But now you couldn’t complain that he was following you.
Why do I care if he drinks or not?
No. It’s normal. You’d care for the well-being of anyone you know.
You approached a set of swings in the center of the park. It had been ages since you’d been on one, swinging back and forth in carefree.
“Want me to push you?” you heard Dazai over your shoulder when you examined the equipment.
“Heck no,” you responded.
“Why not? It’d be fun!” He moved closer.
“No! I’m not sure if it’d even carry me,” you laughed. “It’s for kids.”
“You can try it. Just sit. And I’ll catch you if it breaks—“
“Shut up. I can catch myself.” You lowered yourself onto the seat, seeing that the metal poles did hold. You swung yourself a bit to test if it’d keep up your weight.
“It works.”
“Great! Can I push you now?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“I don’t trust you.”
“I won’t kill you, bel—I won’t! I promise.” Dazai childishly held out a pinkie toward you.
You sighed. “Fine. Just please don’t push me too high.” You clasped your pinkie around his.
“I got you!” You felt palms on your back, and then a light push that moved you forward, and then gravity pulled you back toward him.
Everything pulls me back to him—my mind and the universe both.
You were suddenly pushed higher, catching you off guard. You felt yourself fly multiple feet off of the ground, and you clutched the metal in panic.
“H-Help—Osamu!”
“You’re fine. You won’t fall,” Dazai chuckled. He pushed you again, sending you even higher than the previous time. You wanted to scream, but it came out more as a laugh.
“Is the thrill fun?” he asked while you were in the air, noticing your smile.
“Yeah, it is—HEY!”
Dazai had pushed you hard, sending you swinging all around the equipment, in a complete three-sixty.
“Osamu!” you cried, the momentum spinning you around once more. You couldn’t stop it—it was too fast.
You were clutched from behind, arms tightly wrapped around your torso to stop the swing. You could hear the sound of Dazai being dragged through the rocks below, but he was able to ground the both of you before you went flying again.
And you felt warm. Despite the evening’s cool air, you felt like you were encompassed in a fireplace’s heat on a winter day.
“Got you.”
You let out a giant exhale of relief. And then, you turned around in anger.
“I told you not to push me that high!”
“But I didn’t kill you, did I? You stayed on the swing the entire time! You were safe! Plus, I think you enjoyed it.”
You stood up, causing Dazai to let go of his arms. “I’m dizzy now.”
“Do you need water? We can buy some. And did you drive here?”
“No, I took a taxi.”
“Let me drive you home then,” he said.
“I think I’m fin—“
“Please,” he cut you off almost urgently, but then he caught his tone and reverted.
“I mean, many kidnappers disguise themselves as taxi drivers. Especially at night.”
“You’re still so cynical,” you replied. “Stop being so protective. It’s not like we’re…nevermind, sorry.”
You didn’t dare look at Dazai’s expression.
…
You each got a yogurt drink, and it helped soothe your dizziness immediately.
You walked by Dazai silently, but compared to earlier in the night, you were no longer repulsed to standing by him.
He opened his car door for you before getting in his seat on the other side.
“What have you been up to these past months?”
You asked as he found his keys, turning them into gear.
“A case. It’s something huge going on.”
Dazai’s work accounted for part of your breaking up with him. He was too secretive—despite you knew that he trusted you so much that he explained to you exactly what his job consisted of, and he only left details out to protect you from getting involved, you couldn’t handle it.
Maybe you were selfish for that. But you needed to know what your boyfriend was up to—if he was safe. Perhaps that was another reason why. You would never let him go if you knew of the exact danger he was volunteering himself in.
“I see. Sleeping okay?”
“If I do, sure.” He was suddenly reaching over your body, grabbing your seatbelt.
Your heartbeat fastened as Dazai hovered over you, pausing to look at anticipating eyes and a risky glance at slightly parted lips.
He sighed before fastening the buckle and moving away, acting like nothing happened.
…
You two drove in silence, you gazing out of the car window to admire how the city looked in the absence of the sun.
A song was suddenly put on. You looked at Dazai.
“Do you still like this song?”
“Yeah,” you replied. He had put on your favorite song, indeed.
You silently thanked him for it. The awkward tension to speak to one another had vanished; you could indulge yourself in music.
Until it ended, of course, but by then, you could see you were almost home.
“Osamu.”
“Yes?”
“This was a really bad idea. I hope I never see you again after this.”
“Probably, but maybe I wanted it to happen. Maybe I thought about you so much that I had to seize this opportunity.”
“What?”
“What if I hope to see you again after this?”
“You can go flirt with any other girl for entertainment.” He did a lot of that, too. Even if it was Dazai’s most efficient tactic for getting information, he had also said he simply couldn’t help it sometimes.
“I don’t find that interesting anymore.”
You looked at his distant, faint reflection through your window.
“…you think about me?”
You were answered with a nod.
Dazai turned, pulling you into your driveway.
“I’ll continue to even more after tonight,” he said. “Whether we see each other again or not. It plagues my mind every day. What I could’ve done better—how much you deserve that I failed to reach.”
He parked. “Of course, I’ve tried to move on. It’s the most fair thing to do for you. But if someone were to ask me, bella, saying that I don’t still love you would be a lie.”
“You’re selfish,” you commented.
“I know. I’m very.”
You opened the door, stepping out of the car.
“Thank you for driving me,” you said.
You walked towards your front door and then looked back at Dazai, who was standing by his side of the car.
You contemplated for a second.
“D-do you have something to do for the rest of the night?” you carefully asked.
“No.”
“Can you stay? Just for a bit. We can talk about things. And hopefully, you get some answers that will help you stop occupying your mind of me.”
You said that as if you were trying to convince yourself, rather Dazai.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.” You pushed open the door.
Dazai followed you as you walked through the house—through the hallway and to the kitchen.
“Do you want something to eat? Or drink?”
“I’m okay, thanks,” he replied.
“Alright. Uh…feel free to make yourself at home. I’m going to change, I’ll be right back.”
…
You walked into your room, first washing your face in the bathroom. You stared at your face through the window, noticing how pigmented your cheeks were.
Why did I do this?
You were in the middle of changing your pajamas when Dazai knocked on your door.
“Can I come in?”
“Uh—“ you hastily buttoned two thirds of your shirt before, “Yeah.”
A smell of your favorite scent immediately flowed into the room as Dazai came in. It was of the candles you had around your house.
“You lit my candles?”
“Yeah. I got curious because the flavors looked nice. I like them. The scent matches you perfectly.”
“Oh…thanks,” you mumbled. You didn’t know how else to respond.
Dazai glanced around your room. Some things changed—you had moved some things around, redone the decor on your nightstands, changed your bed sheets…what he didn’t know was that you actually donated them after the break-up so you would never see them again.
“Did you need something?”
“Yeah. Do you still happen to have bandages?”
“Yes.” You had Dazai sit on the bed while you searched your closet for the box of bandages you would keep for whenever he came over. Unlike your sheets, you had kept them for your emergency first aid.
Or in case he happened to be in an emergency.
“What do you think you could’ve done better?”
There was a silence right after. You had hit Dazai with a hard question first.
“I’d stop disappearing so much without warning. I only realized how much I took that for granted when we stopped seeing each other. I would try to communicate better…” He looked down. “I’m terrible at it, I know, but I would try harder.”
“Why me? You could move on and find some other girl to treat right the first time.” You found the box, pulling it out.
“Because I would feel like a loser,” he added your name to the end of the sentence. “I was a total jerk to someone who loved me, and then I decide to switch it up for someone new and pretend to start on a clean slate? No, bella—I’m cursed with not forgetting and forgiving myself of the past. It feels cowardly.”
“Osamu, stop. You hurt me, yes, but you weren’t the only one in the wrong.
“I-I’m sorry.” You hadn’t apologized to him yet, through months.
You noticed his eyes almost widen, surprised.
“And I also forgive you. It took awhile, but I’m forgiving you of the mistakes that hurt me,” you continued. “And I’m apologizing to you too. So please forgive yourself. You don’t need to feel guilt.
“It’s only fair to you as well to move on.”
“Why, bella? How is it fair? How is it fair when the only person I want to see is you?”
“Osamu.”
You were right in front of him, the closest you’d been to him that night, discarding how he had tightly hugged you on the swing earlier. You were drowned in emotion that surrounded his desperate pleas.
“Can you please bandage me?”
“Why?”
“I miss your touches.”
You regret asking. He had no shame in expressing his thoughts, no matter what you two were going through. You regret asking, yet…
“Your coat.”
You climbed behind and rid Dazai of the top portion of his clothes—his vest and dress shirt. Then, you started unwinding the bandages on his arms, chest, and neck.
Gently, your fingers grazed the scars that hid underneath his attire, and his mind. Months ago, you had learned what every single mark came from after knowing where each one was—it was one detail Dazai fully opened to you about.
You were thankful you couldn’t see scars of the heart.
He would have thrice as many. Perhaps one of them would include you.
You rewrapped Dazai, leaving only his stomach unbandaged. You moved to do his neck when he paused you with his eyes, mere inches away from his face.
“You still haven’t answered my question.”
You wish he weren’t so pretty. You would’ve been able to rationalize yourself quickly—you would’ve been able to give him a final answer without hesitating. But he ended up being the face of your dreams and the depth of your heart.
“I tell myself it’s fair,” you whispered. His nose was almost touching yours. “I tell myself it’s better that we’re done. But my heart isn’t so sure. It asks the same—how is it fair? To keep myself longing?”
Your arms were around Dazai’s neck with the bandage, yet you did not move to finish.
His gaze moved to your lips. A hand moved to your hair.
“Is it fair? If it truly is, push me away, bella.”
He didn’t force himself any closer, leaving you with the choice despite his yearning appearance. You could feel the warmth of his body on yours and the soft air of his breaths on your cheeks.
“Yes. It’s fair, Osamu.” You came to your conclusion.
Yet, you dropped the bandages, cupped his face towards you, and pressed your lips on his.
“But I’m selfish too.”
You moved your hands to waft through brunette locks as Dazai pulled you onto his lap. He held you tightly—desperate at the acceptance of your invitation.
Closer, along with the fresh scent of green tea, there was a note of sweetness as intoxicating as chocolate. You came to know this pleasant surprise every time you were pressed up against him, tucked well into his embrace.
A hand moved down your waist, tracing your curves. Meanwhile, his kisses became sloppier, changing course to your jaw.
“Bella,” he whispered.
“Osamu?”
“Too much? Just let me know.”
“Don’t stop.”
He planted his lips on your neck, leaving a mark when he moved to the next area.
“I don’t want to lose you again. I missed you so much.”
“I missed you too,” you replied, pulling him down over you.
“Everything about you,” Dazai continued. “It’s enchanting. How you smile when you’re flustered—like right now, and how you react when I touch you here…”
His hand found its way under your shirt, and you started laughing. He knew how and where to draw every specific reaction out of you, including where you were most ticklish.
“Osamu! Stop, hah-!”
You let him stay hovered over you and left his curious hands to wander your skin. Dazai looked free of emotional distress for once—being able to calm just by admiring you. It was like medicine.
“Do you still keep a spare pajama set?” he asked.
“Yes. However, the guest room is being renovated.”
“It’s fine. A couch was a luxury for me at one point.”
“Or you…could stay here. And you can have your favorite side, the side closer to the window.”
“Because I always see how the sun’s rays lay on your skin when I wake up,” he smiled. “And how spellbound your eyes make me when you open them and the light hits it.”
“You remember so much.”
“I told you how much I think about you, belladonna. I remember every night that I’m with you.”
dazai listens to music w/ u if u rb. reblogs are cherished; they support me as a creator. <3
© AUREATCHI 2023. no reposts or translations. do not steal.
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This isn't really new or anything but the more I reread random passages the more convinced I am that there's something very unique about the way Jiang Cheng reacts to Wen Ning and it's just so interesting!
I'm convinced it's more than just being angry. It's more than just hating him, or blaming him for Jin Zixuan's death or his sister's life. It's more than being a Wen, and it comes long before so many of those tragedies unfold anyway.
There's a sort of urgent, visceral reaction to Wen Ning's presence that just has this different feeling to it than how he reacts to any of the other characters. Even characters he has strong emotional responses to, it's never with the same panic or recklessness. It's not the same as the whole "vengeful wrath, fathomless hatred, or raving ecstasy" situation he's got going on with Wei Wuxian (sexy as that might be).
When it's Wei Wuxian, it's all "...well, well. So you're back?" and "Haven't you got anything to say to me?" Even when he's not being very nice, even when he's throwing teacups and furious at Wei Wuxian, there's still an edge of calmness in the way he lashes out. He's fucking mad but he's had more than a decade to think about this and he's got things to say and he's trying so hard to get a reaction from Wei Wuxian that he just won't give him.
But he can't tolerate having Wen Ning anywhere near him. Much of the time he instantly lashes out, physically, in ways to create space between them. He's mean to Wen Ning, but he doesn't really have much to say to him; he just wants to get away from him.
It really stuck out to me how instinctive and instantaneous and emotional that reaction is when I was reading this passage from chapter 81 (ExR translation since I've got it on hand in digital text form), when Jin Ling returns Zidian and rushes back into the fray during the Second Siege:
When Jiang Cheng was unaware, he stuffed Zidian's ring back into his hand and sprinted toward the crowd, all the way up to the most dangerous area before the mouth of the cave. Jiang Cheng was about to chase after him when he managed to slice a few corpses, staggering. He felt that Sandu was no lighter than hundreds of pounds. Two female corpses threw themselves at him from both directions.
Jiang Cheng cursed. As he lifted his sword again, another pair of hands tore the two corpses into pieces, "Sect Leader..."
Jiang Cheng lost his temper as soon as he heard the voice. He kicked Wen Ning away and cursed, "Get the fuck away from me!"
Obviously that is not very nice and poor Wen Ning didn't deserve a kick for being legitimately helpful there, but the point is that not only does he lash out - the reaction happens even when he's clearly got higher priorities going on in a chaotic situation. Throughout that entire event he reacts in a somewhat more even-keeled way to almost everything except Wen Ning being in his vicinity.
And it's not just after Wen Ning's death, not just after he became Wei Wuxian's greatest weapon, not just after he was forced to kill Jin Zixuan - it's specifically a pattern established from the moment he woke up in the Supervisory Office without a core:
Before he could say anything, those sun robes reflected against Jiang Cheng's eyes. His pupils suddenly shrunk.
Jiang Cheng kicked Wen Ning, toppling over the bowl of medicine. The black liquid all spilled onto Wen Ning. Wei WuXian wanted to take the bowl of medicine. He pulled up Wen Ning as well, who had been shocked speechless. Jiang Cheng roared at him, "What's wrong with you?!"
At this point he doesn't even know how he was rescued, since he was unconscious for all of that, and thinks they're in a Wen trap and likely going to die (or worse). But there's so many echoes of that interaction again, and again, and again between them.
And combined with Wen Ning's remarks during the scene just before this, where he tells Wei Wuxian about the discipline whip injuries and how Jiang Cheng 'should have other injuries as well', the way the narrative is so deliberately ambiguous on what exactly occurred, it all makes me want to crawl up the walls and gnaw on the light fixtures wailing WHAT DID YOU SEE, WEN NING?! WHAT DID YOU SEE?
At a minimum, Jiang Cheng knows that Wen Ning was there at Lotus Pier prior to his capture by the Wen guards, because they'd both seen Wen Ning examining Jiang corpses on the training field before they fled for Meishan.
But everything after that is only implication and subtext and suppositions and speculation, not directly stated in the text. But based on his reaction, you can pry my headcanon from my cold dead hands that that Wen Ning probably witnessed all or much of what happened to Jiang Cheng after he was captured, and Jiang Cheng knows it.
I've also posted before how I think there's an at least nonzero chance that Jiang Cheng was never directly told that Wen Ning wasn't actually there with Wen Chao when they saw him early on, but came later to try to help (because when Wen Ning gives Wei Wuxian that information Jiang Cheng isn't conscious, and nobody tells Jiang Cheng anything. I don't think that headcanon changes much either way, but there is a slight difference, at least emotionally, between 'I helped you while I was there to slaughter your clan and destroy your life' and 'I came when I heard my crazy cousin was slaughtering your clan and tried to help you' and I think it's a juicy thing to add to the pile of misunderstandings they each have of the other's motivations and actions).
Which, if I go with these two ideas together, really drives home what a bespoke and specific nightmare the way the Golden Core reveal played out - not only the substance of the reveal, but the fact it was Wen Ning who revealed it.
He was already furious that they were even there at Lotus Pier, particularly Wen Ning. But the way it all happens it feels like it's not just echoes of the amplified emotions of the confrontation with Lan Wangji & Wei Wuxian in the Ancestral Hall, it's not just Wen Ning being a Wen, or even Jin Zixuan's death, the way the narration calls out. It feels like there are deeper layers to it.
I also feel a bit stupid for not noticing before this probably extremely obvious to literally everyone else who isn't a dumbass like me parallel of Wen Ning getting a gruesome scorching whip mark across his chest at Lotus Pier in the course of saving Wei Wuxian (more or less, sort of - we know as readers Jiang Cheng was intentionally trying not to hurt them with Zidian, but I don't think Wen Ning knew that when he jumped in).
Jiang Cheng looked to find that the uninvited guest was Wen Ning. Immediately, he raged, "Who let you inside Lotus Pier?! How dare you!"
He could manage to tolerate others, but definitely not Wen Ning, the Wen-dog who put his hand through Jin ZiXuan's heart and ended both his sister's happiness and her life. Just a look, and he felt the urge to kill him right there. How dare he step foot on the earth of Lotus Pier—he really was looking for his death!
Because of the two lives and many other reasons, Wen Ning had always felt guilty, and so he'd always been somewhat scared of Jiang Cheng, consciously avoiding him all the time. Right now, however, he blocked Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi as he faced him, taking the hard lash. A gruesome scorch climbed across his chest, but still he didn't flinch.
I don't know that it actually means anything but it's making me FEEL THINGS incoherently at this specific moment, so. Also I find it legitimately sad that Wen Ning has to live with guilt over things that happened when he was controlled by someone else, though the scene before the Ancestral Hall when Jin Ling starts crying on the boat is probably a better example of that. Anyway.
It's just there's so, so many layers to how uniquely horrible it is for Jiang Cheng that he not only finds out about the Golden Core transfer this way, but also that Wen Ning, specifically, directly witnessed this life-shatteringly huge deception and sacrifice too - while Jiang Cheng was unconscious, no less.
And, well, we know how everything got capped off in that scene...
Obviously the shock of the information was going to get a huge reaction no matter what, no matter who or how he found out. Even without the Wen Ning element, it already hits every one of his deepest weaknesses and insecurities and fears.
But to come from the guy who'd witnessed his family being slaughtered, who'd witnessed who-knows-what humiliations heaped on him (who also happens to be the same fucking guy that Wei Wuxian thought it was worth leaving Yunmeng Jiang for, breaking his promise for...), the guy he blames for his sister's tragic fate (whether that blame is misplaced or not), the guy he exhibits a panic response towards even decades later, and goddamn.
There are just so many layers to this perfect little nightmare reveal on so many different levels aren't there?
There's just SO much meaty stuff for these two to dig into post-canon and all we get is an extra with a 'oh yeah sometimes Jiang Cheng yells on night hunts and Wen Ning is there' about it?!
I should probably just shut up and go read some Jiang Cheng and Wen Ning focused fics or something (whether romantic or platonic that's probably an area I really haven't explored enough vs. the amount of sheer interesting hints and material the novel gives to work with! If by some miracle anyone made it to the end of this beast feel free to drop any recs that explore them, especially that 'what did Wen Ning see?!' aspect of the whole situation because that is the current little brain worm haunting me right now).
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wanted to post some comfort lestappen after yesterday and generally to kind of cleanse the energy of the tumblr dash over the last couple of days.
enjoy <3
__
“Baby,” Max says, “Come on.”
It doesn’t change anything. Charles stays lying on his front, his face buried in his pillow.
He looks so small like this. So tiny. It makes Max want to protect him, to kiss his forehead and hold him close and keep him there for as long as they live.
“Charlie,” Max whispers, fingers reaching out to comb through Charles’ soft, brown locks, “Talk to me please.”
Charles replies, but the words reach Max all garbled, the sound swallowed up by the intruding pillow.
But still. It’s progress.
Max lies down on his side next to Charles, throwing an arm over his waist. He kisses Charles’ cheek. Once, twice. Three more times.
And finally, like the sun breaking through grey clouds, Charles’ head turns towards him. Just a little bit. Only a single beautiful green eye looking at Max.
“Hi,” Max smiles, his hand caressing Charles’ cheek, “It’s nice to see your lovely face.”
And despite everything, Charles smiles. It makes Max feel like he’s won a goddamn trophy.
“Do we not want to talk about what’s wrong?”
Charles shakes his head.
Max hums.
It’s not ideal. Charles is the kind of person who always feels better once he talks his emotions out. But if he doesn’t want to, Max will not force him.
“Is there something else we can do, that I can do which would help?”
Charles’ bottom lip sticks out, a cute little pout that makes Max’s chest ache.
“I don’t know,” Charles whispers, his voice rough and heavy, “I don’t know what to do, what will help.”
Max nods, running through his mental directory of things and activities that he knows Charles enjoys.
“I think,” Charles begins, biting his lip.
“Yes?” Max urges, running his fingers down the length of Charles’ spine, smiling gently at the shiver that follows.
“I think I just want to be sad for a bit,” Charles says, his eyes so careful, so observant, undoubtedly evaluating all of Max’s expressions, “I just want to be sad and watch some tv and that’s all.”
Max doesn’t know what to think. Or say.
It’s not something Charles has done before, as far as Max is aware of. Charles either talks about it or works out about it or writes some music about it. He’s never just… been with it. That’s more of Max’s thing.
“Is that okay?” Charles asks cautiously.
“Of course it’s okay, schatje,” Max says, moving closer to kiss Charles’ nose, “Of course.”
The corners of Charles’ mouth turn up a little, making the corners of Max’s mouth turn up a whole lot.
“Do you want to be alone? I could give you some space, go sim race for a while or play with the cats.”
Charles frowns, shaking his head, “No. Stay.”
“Okay,” Max smiles, “Do you have something particular you want to watch?”
“No, not really. I just don’t want to think.”
“Okay,” Max nods, “Okay. Come on then, come here”
Max sits up, leaning against the headboard, holding his arms open.
Charles is quick to move, settling into Max’s side, breathing a sigh of relief.
“I’m going to pick the third movie that’s on our watchlist, okay?” Max asks, feeling Charles nod against him, his hair tickling the inside of Max’s arm.
Max doesn’t think he’s even heard of the movie. It’s animated and about a goose and a fish and why the hell is this on their watchlist.
Doesn’t matter. He picks it anyway.
It’s quiet as they watch the film. Something Max is not used to.
Charles is a chronic talker. Even during movies. Seriously. The man has an opinion about each scene and he will make it known.
He is really fucking lucky that Max doesn’t care much about films and would rather be listening to Charles’ voice anyways.
Yeah, it’s odd, feeling Charles next to him, matching his own breathing to his and not knowing any of the things going on in his head.
But it’s okay. It’s what Charles needs. And that’s all that matters.
Charles snorts suddenly, scaring the shit out of Max, “I don’t get it. How can a goose and a fish be friends? Like how can a goose hear what the fish is saying underwater?”
Max has to force down a cackle to be able to reply. It makes his voice sound all strange and high-pitched.
“That’s the part you decide to question and not the fact that they of course can talk?”
Charles rolls his eyes, giving Max’s arm a hard smack, “You know what I mean, you asshole.”
Max doesn’t. He really, really doesn’t.
But Charles has already moved onto sharing his next thought and he sounds lighter and he’s moving his hands around as he talks and so when he asks Max if he thinks it’s stupid that the main character goose has a ‘cooler haircut’ than the other geese, all Max does is nod and say, “So fucking stupid, schatje. It’s so stupid.”
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THIS SCENE
THIS SCENE WAS EVERYTHING TO ME
First of all, shout-out to Nick for quietly but assuredly knocking on the door to the stall while Boston and his hookup are making out and then proceeding to give a heartfelt apology and confession, as if the hookup isn’t even there. 95% of people wouldn’t be caught dead even walking into the bathroom, and the other 5% would cause a loud, raging scene. Nick is in his own league.
Also I do feel bad for the hookup for getting interrupted and then having to stand at the back of the bathroom stall during all this. Shoutout to you bro.
Anyways can I just gush and be emotional over this scene? After everything that Nick has done to try and keep Boston by his side, he comes in with this speech to say goodbye, and he gives Boston so many things that he needed to hear.
First of all, this apology was absolutely necessary, as was the “You don’t have to forgive me.” Boston hasn’t gotten a single acknowledgment that what happened to him was messed up. The only apology Nick gave before was when he was begging Boston to stay, and that’s not a real apology, that’s just saying what you think someone wants to hear. While Nick could have gone into more detail about why what he did was wrong, this is still a heartfelt and genuine apology. He’s not apologizing just to make Boston happy with him. He’s not begging for forgiveness. He’s just saying that he’s sorry.
Then there’s this. This is one of the things I love about BostonNick because they do seem so truly happy around each other, even outside the bedroom. And Nick has never said it until now. Boston has gotten closer to saying this than Nick. And Boston probably hasn’t heard this from anyone before.
We know that Boston is used to people only wanting him for sex. We know he was surprised when Nick asked him to help move because he couldn’t comprehend someone wanting a favor from him that wasn’t sexual in nature.
Earlier this episode, Atom compliments Boston’s photography skills, but that conversation was about sex and Atom trying to get into Boston’s pants. Nick has already made it clear that he isn’t asking for anything, and I don’t think Boston is used to people complimenting him without an angle.
But this is the part that Boston needed to hear the most. Because honestly, who doesn’t need to hear this?
“You’re not a bad guy.” Boston especially is constantly villainized by the people around him, when there’s only a few specific things that he has really done wrong. And this statement wouldn’t hit the same coming from anyone else. Because Nick knows everything that Boston has done wrong, and Nick has done some of those same things himself. Nick means it when he says Boston isn’t bad. And this in itself is an apology for things Nick has said before. That Boston is a bad guy, that he deserved what he got for sleeping around.
“Your friends love you for who you are” It’s the way Boston has to steel himself for a moment when Nick says this. Hats off to you, Boston coz I’d be weeping. You are so dedicated to not feeling emotions but Nick has gotten to you.
“Because I love you for who you are.” Honestly do y’all think Boston has ever expected that he would hear these words? Boston is so scared of being known. He tries to wear his confidence on his sleeve, but he is scared of exposure and he is scared of letting people close.
And yet here is Nick, who knows Boston. Who knows that Boston lusts freely and openly, who knows that Boston can be mean with the truth, and that he has the fatal human flaw of desiring companionship. And he loves him. Who doesn’t want that!!
Boston is processing more feelings in this moment than he has in his entire life. The Boston of 8 episodes ago would not care about Nick saying goodbye. The shirt is bang on the nose once again because the old Boston, the pre-Nick Boston would be smiling like nothing mattered. But instead, his walls have crumbled.
I cannot say enough that I love the way this scene closed. That this is what pushes Boston to chase after Nick. The development!!! 😔🤌✨
And then we end with a parallel shot from before the bathroom!! The cinematic poetry is killing me. Nick seeing Boston with someone else and deciding to move on—and then Boston seeing Nick with someone else and realizing that he wants to hold on.
I need ppl to yell about this with because I’m not okay, I love this red flag ship, and I want to glue this scene to my eyeballs.
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Hi! Love your TikTok translations, they help me learn so much. Sorry if you've answered this before already, but as a language student myself, I was just curious about how you got so good at Chinese - is it a native language for you, or what's your background in using/studying it? Thank you!
I think I answered this a long time ago (like 2021 maybe) so I will just tell it again. It's kind of a longwinded boring post that's very self-centric (😬) and also probably not going to have any helpful advice to the average language learner, so I'm going to put it under a read more!
Background
My family is Chinese so it's my heritage language. I did learn it before English as a baby but then forgot a lot of it. My parents speak Chinese at home but I always replied in English growing up. Part of this is because I have a twin sibling and because we spoke English at school, we also started speaking English to each other at home.
We went to Chinese school on Sundays growing up (this is like a community/cultural school; it included other courses like math, Chinese dance, art, pre-SATs (lol), etc, depending on who in the community was available to teach), but I didn't really pay attention so my Chinese was pretty shit for a long time—like broken conversational level shitty, although I have always had a strong comprehension ability. My dad's side is from Sichuan so I grew up understanding a bit of Sichuanese.
The beginning of my "studying"
I don't actually have much of a background studying Chinese in a formal setting. I took Chinese 101-103 in college as part of a language requirement (specifically chose to start with 101 so I could relearn basics, even though my teachers kept offering to place me in higher levels). I really credit my Chinese 101 prof who was also the college's calligraphy teacher for making us focus on brush stroke order and recognising characters and understanding semantic components, which is something other profs did not emphasise (they were more focused on building conversational skills).
Anyway, that was only my freshman year of college because I ended up changing majors and not having a language requirement anymore (boo). I continued studying a bit of Chinese in the intervening years, but I am not a very disciplined person when it comes to self-study, so much of it was just translating song lyrics for my own amusement. During this time, I also started watching some cdramas, but mostly just Chinese web shows, which maybe helped? (I don't think I was watching enough for it to really make a difference).
Fast forward a couple years to 2020 and I started watching more cdramas during lockdowns, including watching 成化十四年 (The Sleuth of Ming Dynasty), which I was super invested in for about two years (this used to be a fandom blog lol). Basically, hyperfixation led me to rapidly improve my Chinese; I started translating a few behind-the-scenes videos for fandom friends. In order to keep up with Chinese fans and gain access to more material about the show, I started venturing onto Chinese sites such as weibo, bilibili, and eventually, douyin, which I downloaded around October of 2020 (so this was 6 months into my increased interest into Chinese things). At first, I translated a couple of douyins to share with fandom friends as I had done with behind-the-scenes materials, but for whatever reason I felt like some of the videos I wanted to translate would just be annoying to spam into the chat... I couldn't figure out a way to connect them to the blorbos, but I still wanted to translate them, so I started posting them here on tumblr. That's how my douyin translations started out. This was the height of covid-19 related sinophobia, too, so at some point I started realising how important it was to continue translating douyins, and that motivated me to continue even beyond it just being a fun thing to do. On that topic, it was through this blog that I realised how poorly understood China and Chinese people are, specifically on this site. I feel like that has changed a lot, or maybe that's just a comment on insular online spaces, but I have to think not; since I started translating douyins, I've seen a noticeable decrease in sinophobic comments and messages (not that I don't still get them, but it's lessened), and I think that's also thanks in great part to other blogs on here that were posting/have started to post more content from China to help increase exposure to tumblr users.
Improving
In any case, in the beginning, I did a lot of translations mostly by ear rather than reading captions because my Chinese reading wasn't that good.
It's kind of slowly improved with time and repetitive reading, and over the last three years now, I've also gone through periods of taking notes and actively seeking out some vocab lists or grammar explanations... but it usually comes in the process of trying to translate something. My motivations in "studying" (it's more like "figuring out") Chinese is largely based on the simple desire to know what people are talking about... what they're joking about... what they're ranting about and roasting. Related: I also started reading fanfics in Chinese about a year ago. Some fics have been easier to read than others, but some of the best ones I've read were also the ones that challenged me the most, and which I had to take a lot of notes on while reading. I'll admit! There have been times where I just took a fic and dumped that sucker in google translate and have it read the Chinese to me, so I could just listen to it like a podfic. But even so, I would take notes, because I think my improvements in Chinese are heavily connected to my Chinese literacy.
Reading douyin comments and forums on douban or comment sections on bilibili has been one of the main ways that I've picked up on common phrases and characters. I often write things down but I do so more as a muscle memory practice, because I have never really been the sort of person who reads back notes (this was also how I studied in school, iirc). Branching out and translating things that are written in formal or non-colloquial styles is also a way I challenge myself from time to time, and I do like to look up the etymology of Chinese characters from time to time because it helps me pick up patterns of semantics and phonetic hints when I'm reading (this makes it easier to guess what a character might mean or sound like, even if you've never seen it before). Overall, translation has been the great learning tool for me. I think maybe it comes down to learning styles? I have always learned better from trying to teach others, and I feel like translation works a similar muscle in the mind; translation is about figuring out ways to efficiently communicate a message, and in order to do so, you must be able to grasp the essence of what it is you're relaying.
All this said... And to try and return to your original ask after all my usual Wawa rambling... I actually don't think my Chinese is that good, lol. In fact, there's probably people who follow this blog who are studying Chinese in a more conventional and methodical manner whose Chinese is objectively much better than mine 🤷🏻♂️ I mean, if you crunch the numbers, I have really only be self-"studying" for three years. Three years of what is really just vibe-based learning. There's a lot of vocab I still don't know (I mean my English vocab is pretty limited too, sooo.... 😭), a lot of areas that I can still improve on, and am improving on, and try to improve on... when the mood strikes. Again, I am not a very disciplined self-study type.
Maybe this will give any other Chinese diaspora hope, though. I feel like it's never too late for us to start learning. There is probably a seed or language foundation within you already which will make it easier for you to start, and then after that, I think it sort of comes down to finding what interests you and will keep you motivated.
Most of the stuff I talk about on here when it comes to culture or folk art or what have you, I did not know even five years ago! I learned about it because I was interested to find out more. (That's another reason I have to laugh when I get some of the asks I do in my inbox... The stuff I don't answer is dumbfounding at times. You translate a couple of funny videos and people think you're some kind of Tripadvisor cultural ambassador guy! I swear...)
The "study" resources I use regularly are the following:
Pleco
Zh-En browser extension
Yellowbridge (usually to check brush stroke order, since I have Pleco)
Baidu etymology pages / Chinese etymology dictionaries such as hanziyuan
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I know this post is only for like two people, but I’m going to make it anyway. So, my obsession with Dead Friend Forever finally reached critical levels and I resorted to binge-watching The Hidden Character just to get more content. For those that don’t know, The Hidden Character (which they literally call “THC”) was the reality show Be On Cloud used to cast DFF. It is bad. Like really bad. And not in a it’s-so-bad-it’s-good-type way. It’s one of the most exploitative pieces of media I have ever watched. I walked into it with a favorable view of BOC, Mile, Apo, and Pond (the CEO), and walked out of it hating all of them.
A small collection of things that happened over the 11-episode run:
Everyone was told that they had to share every single aspect of their life with the viewers or they would be eliminated. And, in fact, the first person eliminated was told that it was because he wasn’t being open enough with the audience. They filmed these boys—one of whom was only seventeen at the time—talking explicitly about their sex lives. Which is, of course, fine to talk about. It’s not fine to air it on television! Even some of the games themselves contained sexually suggestive content (i.e. Which do you prefer "eating" with—your hands or your mouth? If you were to cheat on your significant other, would it be just sex or a full-blown affair?)
During the first part of the show, everyone had a secret that the other players were supposed to guess. One of the player’s secret was that he used to be homophobic. (Questionable casting for a company that only hires men, but I digress). He was praised for having changed his mind. In contrast, JJay’s secret was that he was raised in an abusive household and had once hit his father. Pond crucified the poor guy for this. He made him sit there in front of the whole cast sobbing and apologize for hitting his dad who was an abusive asshole.
After the first half of the show—which served absolutely no purpose at all—we finally move onto the acting portion. This is, after all, supposed to be a talent competition. The judges were so mean. Especially Apo. He was like the Simon Cowell of BOC. There was no constructive component to their criticism. The fact that any of these people are still acting is honestly unbelievable. I would have gone home and cried myself to sleep and then never stepped foot on a stage again.
At one point, each of the groups was assigned a scene from KinnPorsche to act out (because BOC very clearly owns no other IP). One of the pairs was given the scene where Porsche gives Kinn a handjob in the bathroom. I wish I was kidding.
The judges constantly told the contestants to make their scenes feel new and different but any time the actors actually tried to change anything, they complained it was “too” different and the original script was already perfect so who were they to think they could create something better. Once again, Apo and Mile, the original actors of these scenes, are the ones judging them! Like of course they like their version better. What is even happening??
And finally, the whole fucking thing was rigged for Ta to win. Like don’t get me wrong, I love Ta and I think he did a great job, but he was the only one who came into that competition with a built-in fanbase and the winner was chosen by popular vote.
It was all just…baffling. Especially from a company that claims to be trying to change the industry. Like if you want the industry to stop being so exploitative to its actors, maybe start with yourself? It also makes those condescending “how dare you watch our shows just for the NC scenes” press releases they do every week even more annoying.
I have no clue what the reaction to this show was while it was airing but god I hope they never do it again. It literally makes me feel so weird watching DFF now. I feel like those poor kids are being held hostage. Maybe CEO Pond’s been the one under the mask the whole time 🔪
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My Hero Academia AU: Ambush Simulation
Aight, storytime:
So awhile back, I was thinking about Episodes 4 & 5 of the anime Soul Eater where the gang is tasked with capturing two villains, the zombie Sid and the guy who resurrected him, Professor Stein. (There’s also the added stakes that if they fail in this task, they’ll be expelled from school.) After a somewhat harrowing fight, defeating Sid and losing to Stein, the plot twist is this was never a real fight, Stein and Sid were not villains, and this whole thing was just a test that was orchestrated and sanctioned by the school and definitely skewed more toward hazing than actual education.
And I thought, what if that’s all the Vanguard Action Squad was during the Summer Camp Arc? Just a test orchestrated by UA that skewed more toward hazing than actual education. (Note: These are the traditional LoV members, so Muscular, Mustard, and Moonfish are not part of this line-up.) At the very least, that would probably be the meanest ruse Aizawa has pulled. And you can't tell me Principal Nezu wouldn't have been all in for this plan.
"It happened once at the USJ. Despite our precautions, it could happen again. Let's teach them how to prepare...by scaring the absolute shit out of them."
"Ambush Simulation" is playing off my earlier AU comic with Shigaraki being the adopted nephew of All Might and leading a pretty normal life. The rest of the squad is more or less in the same boat. For context, Touya’s canon divergence is he returned home after the three-year comatose and actually stayed there, but since nothing about that household environment really changed, he’s still an unhinged mess, but that is a whole other kettle of fish best saved for another comic. (Clearly getting a kick out of the prospect of scaring a bunch of kids, including his brother, half to death, though.) Toga’s home life is rocky at best after ‘the incident,’ but she’s no longer a runaway teen. Everybody else just kinda fell in with each other.
Their role as a vigilante team was inspired by the series Durarara!, specifically Kadota and his crew for anyone who's familiar. I genuinely forgot the Vigilantes spinoff existed...sigh, it's been awhile and I only recently got back in this fandom. The Vanguard is pretty much living by a 'you're only in trouble if you get caught,' philosophy. (And the nepotism has probably saved all their asses a few times because it doesn't look good for the No. 2 Hero if his eldest son is busted for vigilantism.)
Anyway, there's a few other details that I can't fit in this post, so head over here if you want to read more behind the scenes of making this thing.
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“You’re scared…. and broken…” With, literally any of the Glamrocks after Ruin(preferably Eclipse and Monty)-
"N-NO!! STOP IT!! BAD GATOR!! BAD GATOR!!!!"
Hearing the terrified shrieks of a certain daycare animatronic, you were quick to rush into the garage, stumbling upon a rather frightening scene:
Eclipse, who reverted back to Sun, was on the floor as Monty's teeth were latched onto his leg, violently tugging on it in an attempt to shred what little remained of the tattered striped material. The gator snarled all the while, shaking his head around while the former kicked and screamed.
It didn't take long for you to figure out how to separate the two, grabbing a metal pipe and tapping it loudly against the wall to get Monty's attention on you for a second.
"Montgomery Gator. Let him go NOW!!"
Upon hearing his name, he let go of Sun and stared at you, shrinking away as you approached. With a huff, you tossed the pipe towards the furthest part of the area. "Go fetch."
As he crawled away, that gave you a chance to examine Sun for any serious damage. You kneeled down, frowning as the traumatized animatronic was whimpering at the current state of his other leg--arguably the only "good" leg he had remaining.
'Jesus..I can't leave these two alone for even a second..'
"Are you okay?" You asked worriedly. "Is your leg still functional?"
"Yes, but alas....p-pretty patterns are all ruined now..." He bemoaned. "No stars..no stripes...all gone. No more..."
"Sun, I promise I'll get this sewn up for you. But listen...I warned you not to go anywhere near Monty." You set a gentle hand on his knee. "Why did you go near him?"
"I....we just wanted to say hi! I-I didn't think he'd hurt me! He used to be so nice! S-Sure I might have called his music too loud, but he didn't seem offended by it!!"
"What he did to you wasn't anything personal." You shook your head, sighing. "He's not himself. He's gone...completely feral now. Do you know what that means?"
He was still for a moment, before shaking his head.
"It means he's not gonna know who you are. You all have been stuck there for so long that...he's acting on animal instincts now. He barely even knows me anymore."
"..so..you mean....he thinks he's actually a gator?"
"Exactly." You nodded. "And until I can figure out how to restore his original personality, we'll have to treat him as such."
Sun remained silent, his gaze wandering back to Monty. He was gnawing on the pipe. It wasn't much, but it stopped him chewing on anything else in the garage, such as the important Fazbear Ent. equipment you stole from the plex.
It's not like anybody was going to use it anyways.
"It's not fair to him...o-or me. Why did this have to happen to us?"
"..I don't know. I wish I knew why, Sun." All you could do was shake your head, feeling sad that you couldn't simply repair them both like nothing even happened.
Like they weren't left to rot in that mall for years.
Your exploration of it was still fresh in your mind.
While you couldn't track down Chica, Roxy, or Freddy...you were able to at least find Eclipse and Monty, convincing them to come home with you as it was a lot safer.
Eclipse was more than willing despite being worried about when the children will return to the daycare, whereas Monty just started following you randomly, always being at your heels like a protective guard dog.
He was your favorite out of the Glamrocks, so maybe part of him remembers that--hence he never attacked you.
Unfortunately you had no idea how he would behave around Eclipse, considering you just rebooted him after Sun and Moon were fighting for control nonstop. The two were in obvious pain with the lights being broken in the daycare, so you were lucky to have a fazwrench on you at the time.
But the strangest thing during your time working for the pizzaplex was that you never knew Eclipse even existed as a character. The company never talked about him, and not a single advertisement (old or new) mentioned him anywhere.
There was only ever Sun and Moon.
Regardless, you were glad to officially meet him and see his balanced personality--with Moon's calmness and Sun's optimism
Unfortunately Monty had some fit of aggression when he tried talking to him, sending him into a panic so bad that it made him switch back into Sun. Now you weren't sure how to bring Eclipse back to the forefront without doing another reboot...as that apparently caused Moon great pain.
The gator, as feral as he was, seemed guilty for what he did as he stayed huddled in the nearest corner of your garage. You could clearly see that he didn't mean to attack Eclipse; he just couldn't control himself.
"[Y/n]...a-are we monsters? Is that why nobody comes to see us anymore?"
Those heartbreaking questions almost made tears spring to your eyes, before you turned back to Sun, taking his hands into yours. "No. Neither of you are monsters. You're scared...and broken. But I'll try my hardest to put you back together. You, too, Monty."
"Grrahhh..?" He perked up at his name, dropping the pipe and crawling over to you when you beckoned him closer.
At first the attendant was panic-striken, almost hyperventilating even. But then he saw him abruptly stop beside you and was confused for a moment.
You smiled sadly and patted Monty's head, feeling what little remained of his red hair. "It's amazing that your mohawk is still attached to you, pal."
He chuckled at that, before looking to Sun and huffing. Although he couldn't speak anymore, the guilt was clear in his body language, something that was quickly understood by the solar animatronic.
"Awh, it's okay, buddy. We can still be friends!" He giggled, mimicking your gesture and patting Monty's head, albeit with great caution.
Fortunately, he didn't bite his hand off this time.
All you could do was continue smiling, being a watchful observer of your two (technically four) favorite characters who you were relieved to have rescued.
'Looks like there's hope for them yet.'
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