#anyway we should talk more about the technodrome

[lizord-lord]

Oh Persephone, what have you done?

[nights-flying-fox]

Deep (Purple) Thoughts (and Realizations)

◇ Click here to read on AO3 | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 ◇

Chapter 5: Talk It Out Donnie shares some information.

Word Count: 1743 | CW: manipulation (kind of??), self blaming (not donnie tho), mentions of genocide, survivor's guilt

(if you think i should add something plz tell me)

 

 Controlling the Technodrome was an exciting idea at first. Donatello Hamato, the first person to fly a spaceship! His dreams from childhood were about to become real. Then he had discovered how disgusting it was. Icky, slimy, alive. The texture on its own made Donnie nauseous. But he could do it, for he was a genius, and this must not stop him. Not when he had said he could. Not when his family’s lives were on the stake. So, he had forced himself. With Mikey’s support the situation being a bit bearable. With every step it got worse. He had to use himself, not just his hands.

 So, he let himself fall into the spaceship.

 At first it felt as if he was being captured. Technodrome’s parts holding him, becoming a part of him. Then he had gasped. Connected. He had control. He knew everything! He could use it, protect his family and be powerful! He had knowledge!

 With ease he controlled the Technodrome. He let it move according to the plan, protected Mikey. He knew why he was there and what he could do. But he wanted more. He could do more. He wasn’t just Donnie, he was also a spaceship. He was a genius with power and knowledge.

 Donnie looked at the ground. “Except knowledge isn’t always good, it turns out.” He spoke. “Not when you can see what the Krang did.”

 The silence felt too long, too heavy. He knew his family were giving him time, he appreciated it. And he wanted to tell them what happened. It was just hard. He felt his hand being squeezed. Raph smiled at him, supportive. Donnie took a deep breath.

 “During my time connected with Technodrome I felt invincible. I didn’t care about what I learned. I... I even could understand why Krang wanted power.” He didn’t want to admit it. But he didn’t want to lie. It was what had happened, what scared him. “Afterwards it changed. Everything I knew, it was terrible. The planets they had taken over, the wars... I am glad we stopped them.” He didn’t want to get into the details. Not wanting to talk about how Technodrome was a corrupted thing, alive.

 “Donnie...” He heard April whisper.

 Before she could continue, he talked again. “The spaceship didn’t whisper or talk like in the horror movies. But it seemed to try control me too.”

 “Control you?” Raph asked.

 “It wanted me to join them.” Donnie replied. “At least that’s my guess.”

 Another silence. He looked at them. Raph looking at him with understanding eyes, Mikey seemed to be worried, and Leo looked at him with wide eyes. Horror, guilt.

 “Don’t blame yourself dumdum.” Donnie warned. He knew his twin well enough to stop him spiraling into self-hate. And not because they’d comfort each other when they had these moments of heavy guilt or self-hate at times.

 “I shouldn’t have asked you to do something like that without knowing what exactly was it.” Leo said. “I am sorry Donnie.”

 “Don’t.” He cut him off. “I wanted to do that anyway. It was an efficient information against the Krang as well.”

 “You learned about their genocides.” Leo pointed out.

 “Exactly. And that’s why what you did was insane, reminder.” Donnie glared at him.

 Leo huffed. “Can’t even apologize and have a heartfelt moment without being accused with your past decisions.”

 Donnie grabbed the pillow he was sitting on and threw it on his face. Leo yelped, “Hey!”

 “You deserved it, idiot.”

 “Rude.”

 Suddenly Donnie was pulled into a side hug. He didn’t need to look to know it was Rapha. The big guy had that emotional look on his face. “Raph gets it, and he is very proud of you sharing this.”

 “Thanks Raph.” Donnie said, relaxing in the hug a bit. He was still feeling the nervousness from remembering everything, but he didn’t mind Raph’s hug. It was comforting. Then he decided to ask something he was wondering for a long time, hopping it wouldn’t hurt Raph now. “When you were... you know... was it like that too?”

 Raph took a deep breath. “Kind of?” He replied. Then voice a little quieter, and yet bravely he explained. “I didn’t see what you did see, at least not during my time like that, but my mind was empty and all I felt was needing power and accomplishing my mission.”

 That was enough for what he wanted to know. Donnie decided to not ask anything else. “I’m sorry big guy.”

 “It is fine.” He said. “Genuinely, I appreciate everything guys. You helped me a lot in the past weeks.”

 It was true. Raph, unlike Donnie, had accepted help. Had admitted remembering parts of his time under Krang’s control, and that he had nightmares often. Raph didn’t want to tell them everything about that time, but he had shared enough for them to understand. Enough to get help. Maybe Donnie should’ve done the same.

 “Is there anything we can do to help you Donnie?” Raph asked.

 He still could, actually. “I...” He began, whispering. “...I don’t have nightmares but... there are times I fear I will feel like that again.” He admitted. “I can’t sleep.”

 “So, this is why you spent hours awake during our turtle pile.” Raph realized.

 Donnie nodded. Okay, end of the emotional stuff, right? He didn’t want to go into more details anyway. “That’s all from me. So, uh, we can move on?”

 “You are terrible at this.” April shook her head with a smile. “But we can work on it. Right, Mikey?”

 Mikey was uncharacteristically quiet. When all eyes were on him, he blinked confusedly, “Sorry, I was thinking something.”

 “Something?” April raised a brow.

 “Mhmm.” He was still fidgeting.

 Nobody was going to let it slip, Donnie knew that. He was proven right when Raph smiled softly at Mikey, “Want to join to hug?”

 Mikey looked at him with big eyes before nodding. As Mikey wrapped his arms around them, Donnie noticed his arms trembling slightly. “Is it your arms?” He questioned.

 “No.” He replied.

 “What’s wrong, big guy?” Raph asked softly.

 Quiet. Then, “I should’ve done more.”

 “What?”

 Mikey snuggled more towards Raph, “I should’ve done more to help. Then none of you would’ve ended up this hurt.”

 Donnie looked at Raph, confused. Raph looked back him with surprise. Before any of them could say anything though, Leo talked. “Mikey, what the shell are you talkin’ about? You literally broke some science law stuff to save my tail that day.”

 Mikey turned slightly to look at Leo, “But I didn’t do anything like you did.” He said. “Raph got everyone safe, Donnie controlled a spaceship, April, Dad and Junior got Krang Sister, and you stopped Krang Prime!”

 Everyone looked at him confused. “Mikey, you realize that without you I could have ended up be dead, right? Heck, we all would be, considering it is your future version who sent Junior back in time.” Leo said. “You even threw a freaking building at Krang.”

 “...It still doesn’t feel enough.” Mikey whispered. “I am sorry, it doesn’t make any sense.”

 “Actually, it does.” April interrupted. She turned to Shelldon who was watching them all silently the whole time. “I am not sure, but wasn’t there something about feeling bad for not going through something others did?”

 Shelldon was quick to answer, Donnie feeling proud at how fast Shelldon could gain information on situations like this. “The closest match seems to be survivor’s guilt.” He answered. “Survivor guilt or survivor's guilt is a mental condition that occurs when a person believes they have done something wrong by surviving a traumatic or tragic event when others did not.” He explained, reading an article he found. “Survivor’s guilt is a response to an event in which someone else experienced loss, but you did not. While the name implies this to be a response to the loss of life, it could also be the loss of property, health, identity or a number of other things that are important to people, is another definition from a different a source.” He added.

 “Close enough, thanks Shelldon.” April turned back to Mikey. “Maybe it’s something like this?”

 “Oh. How didn’t I think of this?” Mikey questioned with surprise.

 “It’s okay, even Doctor Feelings can forget details.” Raph tried to reassure him.

 “That’s why he should take a break.” Leo said. Then he proceeded to join the hug. “And you too. You did amazing back there, Mike. Don’t let your thoughts deceive you.”

 “As an exception, I have to agree with him.” Donnie nodded. “You were very brave back there, Angelo.”

 “Thanks guys.” Mikey smiled with teary eyes. “You are the best.”

 April joined the hug as well, “So are you.”

 Donnie was sure things were already better. Now only if his dumdum twin opened up too—

 “Hey, Raph, if you don’t mind me asking,” Leo suddenly broke the comforting silence. “When you answered Donnie’s question… Is there something you haven’t told us?”

 Donnie turned to Raph. If Leo suspected of something, it was worth to follow his lead. He was a good observer. Raph avoided to look at them, so it should be true that Leo was right.

 “It isn’t that important.” He shrugged it off.

 “Are you sure? You seem to be stressed about it.” April said, “You know you can tell it to us if it bothers you.”

 Raph sighed, “I don’t wanna burden you guys with that. Really, I can handle it.”

 “Okay… but don’t burden yourself.” Mikey reminded. “If it we can, we will help. Just tell us.”

 “Thanks for the support, Mikey.” Raph smiled genuinely.

 Mikey hugged him tighter as a response.

 Donnie watched as Raph looked at the ceiling. He was considering. Donnie knew Raph would see nightmares that wouldn’t let him sleep. Raph was no night owl, it troubled him a lot. Even if he had tried to hide it, it would have been obvious. But Donnie had never thought there being another possible reason keeping him awake.

 He held his hand and squeezed. A silent support, a reminder that they were here. Something the siblings would do when one of them was having a bad day and not being able to talk. Or when the world would become too loud for words. Or just when they wanted to remind each other they were by each other’s side without telling it.

 After a moment, Raph squeezed back.

[dandylovesturtles]

For the emoji ask:

⛔️, ❌️ and 🧠 (Donnie)

⛔ tons, but for ROTTMNT the only one I think is the lair games fic I've talked about on here before. tldr: Donnie and Leo's sibling rivalry boils over, they get mad, they fight, they make up, everything is happy again.

I'll stick what I did write of it under the read more after I answer the other questions.

❌ setting aside the obvious dead dove sorta stuff, I'm at a point where I don't really like writing Major Character Death as the main point of the story (as an incidental plot point is a little different). I'm also not really interested in hurt/no comfort, there's gotta be at least SOMETHING there lol.

I'm also not really interested in "everyone has a normal life" type AUs (like coffee shop or high school)

I'm sure there are more I just can't think of right now lol

🧠 (Donnie) I love the headcanon that when Donnie merged with the technodrome he fell a little in love with it. The implications of that are just *chef's kiss*

Donnie feeling so bad because that thing was used to end the world! But he's also never felt so fully and wholly understood. So accepted. So loved.

He feels the scars on his shell and he wishes he was still connected.

Anyway fic stuff (for the first question) under the cut:

“Welcome, one and all, to the Seventh Annual Lair Games! As is tradition, the first place winner of last year’s competition will now give a rousing speech!”

“Boooo!” Leo jeered as Donnie stepped up beside Splinter, his first place medal swinging around his neck. “Boooo!”

“Silence from the peanut gallery!” Donnie demanded, glaring at him, and Leo smirked back. It was what he deserved for being a sore winner - all he’d done for the last week was recount his victory from the last year, to the point that even Mikey was getting annoyed with him.

(When Leo had said as much, Raph just replied that he was a sore winner too. To which, of course, he said pish posh.)

“Ahem,” Donnie continued, folding his hands behind his back. “Gentlemen, as winner of last year’s Lair Games, I want to start this speech by offering some uplifting words. I want this to be a fun day for all of us, and so I hope you play fair, leave it all out on the field, and prepare to eat nitrogen oxides BECAUSE YOU’RE ALL GETTING SMOKED AGAIN!”

“Oh brother,” Leo heard Mikey mutter under his breath, and he chuckled.

“Now as for the prize, I think I have come up with something that will pique your interest-”

“I’m not switching rooms with you,” Leo called.

“-something that is not my room, random audience member. No, I have something better.” He theatrically cleared his throat again. “The three losing brothers will have to do whatever the winning brother says for exactly one week, starting from the moment the competition ends, and the losing brothers can only say nice things about him.”

“Hey, wait, does that mean we can ask you to build anything we want?”

“What-”

Raph gasped, pumping his arm excitedly in his seat. “I can finally get my skate hawks!”

“That’s not-”

“Pizza oven pizza oven pizza oven!” Mikey cheered, throwing his arms up in elation.

“Hey, stop interrupting, this is my speech!” Donnie folded his arms, glaring down at them. “Why are you all assuming I’ll lose, anyway?”

“Uh, no offense, Donnie,” said Raph, “but you always lose.”

“I’m literally standing on the winner’s podium! Right now!” He waved the medal. “Do you not see this!?”

“Eh, last year was a fluke.” Leo waved his hand as though to erase the past. “Great idea with the prize, though; can’t wait until you guys are all calling me “Master Leo”! Ooo, or maybe I should go with “Your Highness”? Oh, or what about, “The Great and Powerful and Handsome Leonardo”?”

“Why don’t you just go ahead and add “humble” to that, too?”

“Great note, Raph. “The Great and Powerful and Handsome and Humble Leonardo”!”

“Oh no! We will be calling you no such thing, because after I win it is I who you will be calling “The Great Genius Donatello”!”

“If I win, you guys can just call me Mikey.”

“Hey guys, a note from your production crew,” April cut in. “Are you going to spend all day on this, because if so I’m gonna break for lunch.”

[satireknight]

TMNT S02E03 - It Came From Beneath The Sewers

Which is not technically true, since what we see comes from the sewers, and not really any lower down. But “beneath” sounds so much more sinister, doesn’t it?

So the Turtles are back to searching for the next part of the Eye of Sarnath, and presumably hoping that this one doesn’t have horrifying near-fatal effects on them.

What kind of front seat holds five people?!

Donatello’s tracker makes R2-D2 noises at him, which apparently means something. They head off to a relatively deserted area... which has a carnival in it. I guess it had to fall somewhere, so why not a carnival?

April is horrified that they plan to just stroll in, reminding them that they’re turtles and thus likely to attract attention. But they seem pretty relaxed about the idea, pointing out that they can just claim to be part of the sideshow or something like that.

“Is there a carnival dress code?” Well, not being practically nude is probably expected.

I have to wonder, whose idea were the monogrammed belts? Did Splinter have trouble telling them apart, or is it just the easiest way to keep their stuff from getting mixed up?

Meanwhile, Krang has finally gotten sick of his answering machine being filled up with whiny demands, and agrees to help Shredder find the next fragment of the crystal. Also, Baxter threw the first one away, somehow. I’d suggest he did it passive-aggressively, but someone who addresses Shredder as “master” all the time probably doesn’t have enough spine.

And despite never having seen the crystalline tracker or the Eye of Sarnath, Krang is able to zero in on the energy... in the Caribbean.

“I’ve located it, in an area outside the city!” Outside “the city.” Gotta love that even the alien brain-creature has that New Yorker state of mind, where there’s just New York and then the Mad Max wasteland outside it. Apparently Shredder already knows that that’s where a carnival is located, which raises the question of whether he had been there before.

So the Turtles and April sort of wander around, with Michelangelo winning prizes and Donatello getting fleas. But the crystal is found first by two small boys who hope they can trade it for more ride tickets. The Turtles are a bit offput by the idea of mugging small children, but they’re dragged off by the carnival boss who mistakes them for clowns. No, I’m not sure why.

April tries to bribe the kids, but they won’t pony up for only three bucks and/or a credit card. Does she think they have a card reader?

If you need proof that Shredder’s really come down in the world, the mighty and deadly ninja is about to mug two small children.

So after the Turtles are railroaded into doing a clown act (yes, really), 

April milks Michelangelo of all the cash he has apparently been keeping in his invisible pockets. But she’s too late, because Shredder has managed to grab the crystal, get kicked in the shin by one of the kids, and sent the thing flying only for it to be grabbed by Baxter.

“You must admit, I do have soft hands.” Did anyone dispute that?

But things get icky when they head back to their hideout to analyze the crystal, and it bumps into Shredder’s foot, which has some kind of slime on it. The slime is apparently some kind of Dimension X plant matter that Shredder stepped in when.... he was inside the Technodrome. And he decides that a giant plant will obviously be a great way to kill the Turtles, because... uh... Little Shop of Horrors.

The Turtles are kind of upset that they bumbled the whole getting-fragments thing twice in a row, especially since the batteries are running out in the crystal tracking device.

If you need proof Donatello’s a nerd, look how deliriously happy he is at the sight of alien batteries.

Just then giant green vine-tentacles come breaking through the wall, and immediately grabs Michelangelo, who seems to be the natural target for tentacles in this series.

As if it weren’t weird enough, the plant says “ow” when cut, before grabbing April and Raphael, and finally withdrawing after too many nasty jabs. Donatello figures out that it’s not from this planet... which is a bit of a Captain Obvious, since last time I checked killer vine-tentacle plants don’t exist here.

Also, where did Splinter go?

April, having nearly been dragged off by a killer plant, whines because they’re leaving her behind. Maybe they want to keep their rescuing to a minimum? So she ends up in her apartment with her friend Irma, who is thinking of (what else?) men. Wait, apartment? She must have gotten another one incredibly fast; this is only the third episode of season 2, and season 1 featured her apartment being devoured by Mousers. 

Anyway, it’s a note supposedly by the Turtles, with an address on it. A smarter person would wonder why they didn’t just call her, like they said they would, or would verify that they left a note. April just charges out the door without wondering if this might be a trap.

Spoiler: it’s a trap, and Baxter and Shredder are waiting there for her. So Shredder calls the Turtles to notify them that he’s kidnapped her, because apparently the incredibly fast-growing and dangerous alien plant isn’t filling the entire sewer system fast enough.

“That’s April all right. I recognize her mumbles.” This is only the eighth episode, and already they’re used to her being in peril.

Since Michelangelo has a one-track mind, he’s hungry when they get there, much to the disgust of the others. 

But that gives them the idea to disguise themselves as pizza delivery boys, because apparently they have those costumes AND pizzas just rattling around in their van.

“It’s four green pizza delivery boys.”

“I don’t remember ordering any pizzas, especially green ones.”

Gotta love confusing grammar. 

Also, does that mean that people CAN see that they’re green when they’re in disguise, and they just don’t assume there’s anything weird about that unless they specifically know that they’re turtles?

So the Turtles burst in and start assaulting Baxter and Shredder with weapons and pizzas, and of course free April. In about five seconds, the bad guys flee the scene.

So... what was the point exactly of this little cul-de-sac? Capturing April didn’t actually serve any purpose beyond producing another fight scene and filling up a few more minutes. And it will never really be referenced again. Did the episode run a little short, and they put this in to fill it out?

Anyway, the TV happens to be on and they see the monster plant sprouting from the street and causing mayhem.

The plant is apparently big and strong enough to wave around multiple cars at the same time, which means it requires FRICKIN LASER BEAMS just to drive down the street.

But it’s nearing time for the boss battle to ensue, which means that the Turtles using FRICKIN LASER BEAMS attracts the attention of the main plant. Which kinda looks like a multi-eyed hand puppet.

It also starts eating their car, which raises interesting questions about what its roots are feeding off of, since plants generally get nutrients that way. They attack it, but get an embarrassing smackdown before the thing retreats back underground.

They just sort of abandon their van in the alley, and jump down to ask Splinter what they should do. Splinter’s advice is the same kind of wisdom that anybody who’s ever weeded can give you: tackle the root of the problem, very literally. Fortunately the plant is.... bleeding, so they can track it that way.

And it leads to... a solid brick wall.

Um, does that mean the plant broke through, went through the wall, and then replaced all the bricks exactly as they were before? Because otherwise I’m not sure how the trail can lead there.

But it’s all irrelevant anyway because it bursts through again.

It drags off Donatello, which means that it’s time for the others to break out their secret weapon:  drag!

Not kidding. They actually put Michelangelo in a lady plant getup, which he hates of course. Today they’d be taking so many pictures so they could always remember this delightful occasion.

And the plant drops Donatello because it’s.... um... I think it’s meant to be horny. Which isn’t really how plants work; they just sort of have pollen and male-female parts, which insects and wind handle for them. Of course, this IS from an alien world, and technically all it needs to do to count as a plant is to photosynthesize, so... I guess the idea of a horny plant isn’t technically impossible, just very unlikely.

Yeah, my expression mirrors Raphael’s.

The other three tease Michelangelo for the remaining three seconds that he can stand being groped by a horny plant that is making kissy lips at him. Then he busts out the nunchucks and starts beating the plant with them.

Leonardo then brainstorms Splinter’s advice in a veeeeery literal way by stabbing the plant in its... stem. It’s meant to be the root, but roots tend to be underground. And despite being so huge, the plant fortunately is VERY sensitive and immediately shrivels down to a green slop.

So that evening, still not having the fragment, the Turtles celebrate with an all-meat pizza, and April brings them a venus flytrap apparently out of sadistic amusement.

VERDICT

Not bad at all. Not perfect, but it’s a big stronger than the last episode in that none of the characters had massive brain farts for no adequately explained reason... well, except maybe Baxter, but I remain unconvinced that he didn’t do that on purpose.

Anyway, it starts off a bit slow’n’silly with the whole carnival focus, and the kids who talk a lot and appear a lot for about two scenes before vanishing completely. It really kicks into gear when the whole giant plant story starts moving, especially since it provides some interesting insights into how the Eye of Sarnath is supposed to work. But I guess it was too short to actually fill out the episode, hence the April-gets-captured plot cul-de-sac.

And it has a monster-movie focus to match the monster-movie title, even with one scene of Michelangelo exclaiming that he saw this in a movie once (which wouldn’t surprise me, given that there are actually a lot of sci-fi references in this series). It’s not complicated, focusing instead on just being pretty entertaining with the straightforward story it has.

It is interesting, though, that the Turtles consistently fail at getting the fragments despite having a tracking device that exists to do nothing else. It’s also interesting that Shredder doesn’t try to use this latest fragment more than once, since presumably the crystal fragment would also create killer plant monsters with Earth plants. Giant killer rafflesias? 

GRADE: B

[indirispeaks]

Titanic Fail Part the Second

!Presented in convo form!  Apologies for the length

Me:  Okay remember that glorious shipwreck of epic proportions that was the animated titanic movie I told you about with the magic anime girls moonbeam tears?

Him: .....yeah...

Me: I love your suble uneasiness in that 'yeah'. Because THERE IS A SEQUEL.

Him: .....I want to get off this planet now.

Me: "Titanic: Elizabeth And Mullet-Face Go To The Lost City Of Atlantis And There Is A Battle With Sharks And Creepy Clown Toys And Mentally Challenged Racist Caricatures Mice, And Also The Dog Has A Gun For Some Reason."  

Him: fuck my life

Me: Also called "In Search of Titanic" But my version is more accurate.  So Elizabeth and Glove Sniffer, (fuck if I remember the guy's name he made zero impression on me the first time)along with the dog -who can talk now- and the reeeeally awkward mice are riding around in a submarine looking for the wreck of the Titanic.  Which is stupid, since the giant pinkie thing put the goddamn ship back together and lugged it to the new york harbor previously. Whales saved all the people! It was happily ever after all around.  

Him: WHAT IS CONTINUITY?

Me: No one on the production team knows what that word means. It is unclear why the talking mice are qualified to make submersible dives.  Maybe it happened between movies while the dog was learning to talk.  Actually come to think of it, every animal in the first movie could talk except the dog and the whales and yet everyone seemed to understand them just fine even without the glitter spooge and it wasn’tt a big deal to ANY of them. I'm not sure why I'm searching for meaning and logic in a film written and produced by alcoholic lemurs but it still bugs me.

Him: Alcoholic lemurs could have written a better story. meth addicted squirrel monkeys though.

Me: No the squirrel monkeys wrote the sequel.  In the snow.  With their own pee. But yeah the dog can talk now and I think his name is Lucky.  Or Fritz. Or Frank.  Steven? He doesn't like being down there because there are sharks.  Water is blue, Stevie-boy. But speaking of sharks, the criminal shark gulag is back, again with the whaler asshole, still after the whales.  There are no whales in this movie.  The giant pink thingie is apparently called Tentaclino, but no one even calls him that and he's not really in the movie either. For that matter, neither is the Titanic.  I don't know what they were actually calling it, because 80 percent of the dialogue in garbled to high hell in some way or another.  

Which I guess is what happens when three different countries work on the same movie in a fourth language none of them actually speak.  They gave up 20 minutes in anyway and just started trying to out-stupid each other.

The new head shark (also with names changing every other scene) gets da boyz to attack the sub and cut it loose because it's yellow.  All submarines are yellow. Also sharks are colorblind IRL but that's the least of this movie's issues.

Him:  Of course it's yellow.

Me: Everyone in the sub is understandably shocked and upset at this development, except for Glove Sniffer who says that everyone should remain calm while the sharks chew through their tether and oxygen tube.  The breach causes implosive decompression and kills them all instantly.  The End.

Him:  That's not what happened is it.

Me: Nupe.

Him: Joy.

Me: What actually happens is Da Boss shark and his dudebros chew the Technodrome loose to the complete and utter indifference of everyone inside it because the animation budget did not have enough money to pay for more frames when the dudebros start playing tether ball with it.  They ask Da Boss shark if they should finish destroying it but he says no, first he has to stop and brush his teeth. Dental hygiene is important, yo!  This calls for a rap number!

OH YEEEEEEEEEEAH THIS ONE'S A MUSICAL!  YAAAAAY!!!

Him: This is a hell dimension.  We are in a hell dimension.

Me: It sets the precedent for the whooole circus though, because NONE of the "songs" in this technicolor nightmare make any sense to anyone who doesn't just happen to be an acid-tripping squirrel monkey.  The most I got out of this one was the opening line of "YO! YO! YO! LOOK AT MY TEETH! HOOGA HOOGA HOOGA SO WHITE AND NEAT!" and the rest of it was sung by a chorus of small clams who'd come back from the dentist with mouths full of Novocaine.  It SOUNDED like they were singing "Oh, you, you!  There's no white meat out of you!  Oh, you, you!  There's wuh walla, walla WOOOO!!" You can look it up on youtube, the comments are full of people taking guesses at the actual lyrics.

Him: ....

Me: After that incomprehensible nonsense, it cuts back to where Elizabeth, Glove Sniffer and co. have been hanging out awaiting their cues for the last five minutes that you just spent listening to cartoon prison-shark rapping.  Literally.  Upside down and motionless.  Elizabeth's long flowing hair is unaffected by gravity. They come back to life just in time to realize they're probably going to drown and are understandably panicked....except for Glove Sniffer, natch, who tells them to stay calm again but then they go unconscious again and merpeople on multicolored My Little Pony steeds (WHY) come to the rescue and save everybody by spraying air bubbles on their heads....

hang on sec

I missed the part where it became possible for the merpeople to open the top hatch without turning the people into ground sausage. I.

Magic glitter spooge.

I guess.

They're unconscious again in any case.  They're also wearing life vests like that's going to help you 7 miles down. I couldn't tell if they were dead or not as they were not sausage, but if they were it would have saved the audience 70 more minutes of this shit.  Actually I think the dogs name was Pete.

Him: I'd suggest rewatching it as a drinking game but I don't think anyone would survive the alcohol poisoning.

Me: Yeeeeeah.  The mersquad lugs their unconscious asses back to the Lost City of Atlantis, populated by more merpeople who are really just different colored normal people walking around in frog feet with artistically placed fish scales.  Pete wakes up halfway there, catches sight of a merwoman and is utterly convinced he's dead and she's taking him to doggy hell.  Doggy.  Hell.  Full throttle Don Bluth. She tells him to stay calm, they're safe now. He doesn't buy it but WHO THE FUCK WOULD.

You might be able to make a drinking game of how many times they actually say some version of "stay calm." They are met at the door by a blue guy whose name we never find out, who tells them that in order to visit the city they have to drink this incredibly suspicious green potion.  Elizabeth questions the wisdom of accepting drinks from people wearing sexy-nurse costumes complete with white cowboy hat emblazoned with a red cross.  Blue guy tells her to stay calm...and then says "GET EVERYTHING READY!!" to the sexy nurse in a tone that is in no way menacing and foreshadowy.

And from this point on, Elizabeth "I can talk to dolphins with my magiccy-farts" becomes the SOLE VOICE OF REASON.  To which the blue guy tells her to shut up and drink it already..  Total dick move. Glove-Sniffer has lost what few brain cells he had (probably from sniffing other things, like wet paint and cat piss), and says that he understands.  Just stay calm, and isn't this potion a pretty color? Can't possibly be a bad thing! CHUGGALUGGALUGALUG.  I'm not kidding he actually says that. Elizabeth questions her own sanity.

Him: .........she's just now questioning that?

Me: Yeah, well. Elizabeth has seen some fucked up shit in her day. Then the blue guy takes them on a tour! They go and meet this jack in the box clown...fish...pokemon thing with a cape and a pimp cane because why the hell not, who says he's the ambassador or something and oh by the way everything in the city can breathe underwater, never go to sleep, everything can talk, and live forever.  Scary Toy sounds like a cross between Marilyn Manson and Fozzie Bear which is creepy as fuck.  I can totally see Jeff Dunham using that voice in his stand up.  Then it gets bizarre.

Him: again, just now?

Me: More bizarre.

Him:  I didn't know it was possible to go downhill from the deepest pit of hell.

Me:  They have a backhoe for digging, and Buffy missed this particular hellmouth.  There's a bunch of toys that live in the ballroom and Creepy Toy goes into this...this...song and dance number...about how all this works..I must have blanked it out after he made this horrifying demon giggle.  He doesn't exactly sing, either, just spouts more Manson-esque lyrics until all hell breaks loose in a sort of what I can only describe as "Techno Rave Fusion Dance Party Music".  The lights go out and colored spotlights start flying around the raving toy mosh pit (there's a mosh pit) and every single word of whatever the serial killer fish clown is trying to say is completely obscured by WUB WUB WUB, WUBBA WUB WUB WUB!! WUB WUB WUB, WUBBA WUB WUB WUB!!  Elizabeth's voice actor can be heard over the soundtrack saying "THIS IS SCARY!!" and she is so right.

Him: ....

Me: He finishes his routine by abruptly telling them surprise! they're not allowed to leave the city and go home for the rest of their immortal, sleepless lives.  Elizabeth is upset.  Guess what Glove Sniffer tells her?

And then they go meet the king, who is a fushia man I think.  He's wearing a long green robe with attached hoodie cowl from which a black hole exudes so you can't see his face.  Could have been tentacles under there for all I know. He's sitting on a throne which I admit was kinda cool, made out of water with fish and seaweed floating/swimming around in it.  Or at least it was cool until it gets up and starts following the king around and there's a fucking face on it that the king proceeds to sit on and then it blows bubbles right up his ass.  It's a sentient bidet.  

Him: sec, finding the vodka.

Me:  He asks how they are adjusting to the "news" that they are now under house arrest til the end of time, and Glove Sniffer says he's glad they were told right away and in such an amusing manner. Whoever was responsible for writing his dialogue has been huffing rubber cement between sentences. Elizabeth looks irritated.  I don't really blame her.  

Then the movie remembers oh yeah, talking animals!  The dog's name might have been Happy.  Still no clue about the mice.  Happy finds a lady dog that lives in Atlantis because why not, and they frolic a bit  She has no speaking lines and it's love at first sight.  She has no name.  Meanwhile the mice are taken to meet all the other mice and why are there fucking mice in Atlantis?   There, uh.  There's a chinese one.  You can tell this movie was made somewhere other than here because that one would have never got past the MPAA.

Anyway the mice/rats have this plan to overthrow the king and steal the elixir of life and then go Pinky and the Brain.  It is not explained why they the elixir will help them take over the world. They also for some reason have laser guns.  The two sailor mice run and tell the king. He doesn't question their story and neither did I.  Elizabeth did.  

Him: ....

Me: The king decides to let the mice try to take over the world because they're just a bunch of heat-packing mice and he has a bazillion army merpeople and toys and the elixir of life.  He replaces it with water so the mice steal a fake. They test it out by tying another mouse to a rock and tossing him down a well to drown.  I mean if you're going to put Don Bluth-level incredibly dark topics in a kid's movie, you may as well go all in. The Creepy Toy is afraid of the mice taking him apart with a screwdriver because then he'll be dead, (for kids!) but a red dolphin reassures him that screwdrivers are banned in Atlantis.  (Apparently they built the city without screws. I dunno just go with it okay?)

The evil mice are in cahoots with the sharks who are in cahoots with the whaling asshole because there needs to be at least six different plotlines at the same time.  They want to feed the pink thingie to Da Boss shark.  Why? Supposedly he ruins stuff....mainly any sort of continuity when someone tries to inject some sanity into this. stupid.  stupid.  Stupid.  stupid. stupid stupidstupidstupid there's a toy army that goes up against the mice who have their own submarines and how the hell are ANY of them supposed to take over the world when your shark shock troops are stuck underwater and you don't have a tornado handy?

I need a break

Their subs also have lasers but they are outgunned via Glove Sniffer's rampaging stupidity. There's a brief fight montage, the dog sets up a sniper point and starts picking off mice even though he lacks opposable thumbs and he's scared of sharks.  And water.  I'm not sure why he's on this vacation.  Maybe they needed to sell tie in plushies?  

Pew! Pew! Pew!  Pew-pew! WHOOOOMPA! Pew! Pew!

There's also a boy doll who looks like a girl doll because he's got a wig on and it's a curse a little girl put on him to look like a girl and blah blah blah blah it's not important.  None of this is important. He sounds like a pirate even though he's dressed in scottish kit. He off a single cannon shot and ta da! he's a boy again and promptly fucks off the movie never to be seen or mentioned again. Yay, misogyny on top of pointless!  Thankfully he does not sing or rap about it.

Him:  Small mercies.

Me: The war is over!  The mice have slunk back to Atlantis and decide to test their elixir of life anyway even though...their entire battle strategy imploded.  Elizabeth's voice actor has given up entirely and she just sort of stands there, lost in her own little hell.  There's a grand total of 4 seconds where the pink thingie shows up and then leaves so the animators have an excuse to plaster him/her/it on the dvd case.  The king decides to reward the useless tourists, half of whom keep asking nosy questions, and puts the Titanic back together again (I mean this IS a Titanic movie, the ship has to be in the film for at least 12 seconds) There is now a sentient screwdriver in the mix whose supposedly the Creepy Toy Fish's best friend.  They'.....but he's scare...I thought they were ban...the fuck.

Him: Well yeah.

Me: They get the ship cleaned up and put back together (what's continuity again?) and then use it to drop Elizabeth and Glove Sniffer on a deserted tropical island to live the rest of their lives going quietly insane up THERE instead of underwater.  Which is an improvement over hostages, because now they're marooned with the Titanic parked on the beach as their own private yacht.  Thank god they don't have relatives that will miss them or go looking for them. I kinda wonder that since they have issues with continuity if there were dead bodies on the ship.  I assume there probably were but there sure aren't any now. I won't speculate as to what happened to them but you never see anybody eating fish down there, if you know what I mean. That's basically the end, everyone lives happily ever after if you don't count mind never seeing your families and friends ever again.

Him: .....you know I hate you, right?

........the dogs name was fucking “Smile” by the way. 

[satireknight]

TMNT S01E03 - A Thing About Rats

Personally I think rats are underestimated as an animal species. Seriously, they’re the second most successful species on the planet, and only second because they haven’t developed guns or computers yet.

Splinter is still recovering from the events of the last episode, and for some reason they put him on a bed out in the hallway rather than in... well, his own bedroom. The Turtles are pissed off and ready to go find the Technodrome again.

Can I just mention that I love the ongoing continuity here? It gets more episodic later on, but the immediate cause-effect interplay is really engaging.

Meanwhile, the Technodrome is steamrolling an underground city.

Is that... just going to go unexplained? An underground city, mostly intact, right under NYC? And apparently sized for giants, if the Technodrome’s relative size is anything to go by? No, nothing?

Anyway, the Technodrome shoots out a long elevator-shaft thing that burrows up into an abandoned mansion... in the heart of Manhattan.

That space would be worth its weight in diamonds. I don’t know why it hasn’t been ripped down and turned into a skyscraper yet.

Shredder pimps right out and declares, “Now to find a new source of technical equipment.” New source? You have a block-sized tank underground, and an alien brain who’ll apparently give you what you want as long as you give him thumbs. Why do you need a NEW source?

We’re then introduced to Baxter Stockman, a dweeby scientist who is trying to impress an extermination-business’ owner with his Mouser, a robot that that can catch and presumably messily kill rodents.

Admit it, you’re making T-Rex noises right now.

The big drawback of the Mouser is that while it’s effective... it’s also very messy. They don’t show any gore from the Mouser presumably nomming on rats, or even hint at it, but if it’s going to get rid of more than one, it’s going to leave a bloody corpse. Also, it chews through walls. ALL walls. The shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

But the pest guy is not interested because it would actually solve the pest problem rather than just diminishing it, and he’d be out of business. Plus, you know, I suspect the ecosystem requires SOME rats. So he boots out Baxter, and Shredder somehow teleports to the spot to say he wants to manufacture Mousers. He gives Baxter computer parts for a master control for the Mousers.

Shredder, of course, wants these Mousers to kill Splinter, because he is REALLY obsessed with killing his former teacher for some reason, even though Splinter was apparently not going to get involved in anything he did. It raises the question of why he didn’t kill him when they were both in Japan. Even if he couldn’t beat him in a fair fight, there’s always poison.

Meanwhile, the Turtles are still wandering aimlessly in the sewers, and even almost get run down by a train.

“This is not my idea of a good time.” Well, it doesn’t look like Donatello’s either.

You know, for a show called Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, most of the story in this episode so far has involved the villains. Shredder is off scanning the Mouser and reproducing it, while Krang nags him in his parody-of-a-mean-little-old-lady voice. To be fair, I can understand why: Shredder is off obsessing on a guy who wasn’t interfering in his plans anyway, and Krang has no thumbs because of it.

Shredder’s excuse is that Splinter and the Turtles will wreck their plans if they don’t get rid of them... which seems like a self-fulfilling prophecy. As in, they’re only hunting for him because he made it personal. Hell, the Turtles would still be little pets if he hadn’t been so obsessive.

So Splinter is meditating when the Mousers eat through a solid brick wall and chomp at him. This invention is a lawsuit waiting to happen. Fortunately the Turtles arrived... apparently unseen to Splinter... and smash the robots to bits.

Gotta love trademarking. It’s so ridiculous that the Turtles lampoon it.

April is busy pampering herself at her apartment when the Turtles and Splinter turn up at her door. They’re hoping she can find out some information on Baxter Stockman, since Google hasn’t been invented yet.

It’s either avant-garde, or she desperately needs some real wall art.

She goes off to do proto-Googling, and the Turtles immediately start causing trouble. Michelangelo discovers that she apparently eats nothing but frozen pizza (?!), techie Donatello can’t figure out an answering machine (?!?!?!), Raphael apparently wants to take a bubble bath (?!?!?!?!?!?!) and Leonardo starts throwing her lipsticks at the wall like darts (?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?). Result: her apartment is a mess and she’s mad.

Shredder’s paranoia has kicked in, and he orders his robotic ninjas to kill Baxter because... well, because Baxter wants a good night’s sleep instead of hanging around to see the Mousers kill Splinter.

Great exchange: “Oh well, you know women.” “No we don’t! She’s the first one we’ve ever met!”

So the Turtles rescue Baxter just as the robots are about to kill him, and he spills his guts about everything except where Shredder is. 

Well, that’s one way to get results: pointed objects.

So the Turtles steal Baxter’s yellow van, despite none of them ever having driven before, and head off to April’s apartment, where Splinter is taking another nap. Yes, hundreds of Mousers have appeared in the building and are eating through the walls... and apparently nobody else has noticed. Does she live in a one-person apartment building, or is everyone else conveniently out?

The Turtles show up and break several more robots just before the building starts to collapse.

Seriously, not a single other person was in there?

So they head to the mansion and decide that Donatello can use random tech to create a remote for the Mousers, but only if the master control is destroyed. So Michelangelo sneaks inside through the Jeffries tubes, but ends up facing (literally) a gun.

I haven’t mentioned it before, but there’s something of a dip in animation quality.

So Michelangelo is tied up, and announces, “This is stupid!” I agree. You were able to push a brick wall over a couple episodes ago, and last episode you were smashing through metal armor with a nunchuck.

Shit, I’ve watched enough anime to know where this is going! Run! Run away!

No, he’s actually being set free by Krang, and I must say, Michelangelo pretty blase about being freed by a giant brain with a face. Krang also tips him off that his friends are about to be eaten by Mousers, and exactly where the Master Control is.

I really like this. Villains should have their own motivations against each other and not just be on “the bad side.” It makes total sense that Krang would sabotage Shredder just to further his own ends, especially since Krang doesn’t give a shit if Shredder kills his old teacher or not. This is good writing.

Michelangelo goes up to the master control room and tricks Shredder into blasting his own master control with a laser gun. This is bad writing.

So the Mousers all shut down, and Donatello is able to hijack the whole army of them and turn them on Shredder, so they chew down the mansion, forcing him to flee back to the Technodrome. Did I mention Michelangelo was still insdie the building? Fortunately nothing too heavy fell on him... but given that he rammed straight through a solid brick wall in the last scene, would it even matter?

He also brings news of the giant talking brain he saw, but nobody believes him. Because admittedly, that is weird even for the situation they’re in.

The Verdict

After the last episode, this one is a step down on most counts. The animation is simpler and sketchier, with Baxter in particular looking kind of weird and exaggerated. Shredder is more bumbly here, shooting up his own equipment. And the characters of the Turtles are kind of ridiculous in April’s apartment, where they suddenly transform into destructive five-year-olds, including the mature and serious Leonardo. Seriously, lipsticks?

But it’s not a bad episode overall; the main story is a pretty solid one, and I really like the element of Krang sabotaging Shredder to further his own ends, because it’s something that you don’t see a lot in kids’ programming. Villains don’t do things because they’re villainous; they do things for their own motives. And I like that there’s a direct ripple effect from one episode to the next, with Splinter still suffering the effects of the last episode, and the Turtles still pissed off about what happened.

So it’s a step down from the first two episodes, but compared to the series as a whole, still a pretty decent one.

Grade: B

[satireknight]

TMNT S01E02 - Enter the Shredder

Can someone explain to me why we get an image of Michelangelo posing with weapons he never uses?

So we open with the least safe bedding arrangement in history: the quadruple bunk bed!

Seriously, they should have fallen over so many times during the night. It’s also a little baffling as a nighttime arrangement, because we saw in the previous episode that they all have their own beds in their own little cubbies. So why would they sleep together?

And yes, Leonardo apparently sleeps with a practice weapon. Because of course he does. Why would you assume otherwise?

So after waking them up, April watches them practice with their weapons, which ends with a grappling match and Michelangelo denting the wall with his back. Then she accompanies them to breakfast, where they either eat sushi (Japanese people do eat other things, y’know. Quite a few) or pizzas topped with breakfast cereal.

She’s raring to go find the Technodrome, which was last seen under the security building that went kablooie at the end of the last episode. But when they get there, all they find is water and giant treadmarks. Of course, the Technodrome is actually a giant white ball-shaped fortress with an eye on top, sort of like a spherical tank the size of a small town. It’s also being driven by Shredder, who is flipping the fuck out.

He’s also got a new roommate: a tentacled brain-thing called Krang.

Krang is very unimpressed by Shredder, his title, his face, and generally everything about him. He apparently has a giant army in someplace called Dimension X, which is ready to conquer the world whenever the fuck it gets here. But in the meantime, he wants Shredder to get his butt in gear and build Krang a proper body. With you know, thumbs and everything. I can see why he wants that.

Shredder’s brilliant retort? Well, he doesn’t feel safe because Splinter and his Turtles... exist. So, that’s his reason for not making Krang’s body, even though leaving Krang bodiless arguably makes them LESS safe. The real reason? He doesn’t trust Krang, and he doesn’t like the idea of the little wad of snuffy-voiced gum possibly being able to take HIM down.

Oh, and Krang lets it slip that the whole reason they were mutated... was because Shredder tried to kill Yoshi with mutagen. I don’t know why he thought it would be fatal instead of... doing exactly what it’s supposed to do.

One thing that happens a lot in this series is that they almost never use the word “kill.” They use words like “destroy,” “obliterate,” “dispose of,” and other words that basically mean the same thing but without the actual K-word. Ah, censorship for children... you can talk about murder all you want as long as you don’t admit that’s what it is.

Oh, and Krang hints that Shredder should create some more mutants on his own side... and really, that’s an idea he should’ve had far in advance. We really see in these episodes that the Turtles are crazy strong, since they successfully pushed a brick wall over in the last episode, and Leonardo can apparently cut through concrete at a hundred feet.

Anyway, April heads up to the newsroom, while Splinter and the Turtles try to track down the Technodrome. For some reason Raphael thinks it’s gonna be hard to find, even though... well, it’s several stories high and even wider. It’s not like it can go anywhere covertly.

And at the zoo, some robots appear and drag down a rhino and a warthog. Goodbye, animals, you’re probably dead meat, given that drop. 

“Still no sign of the Technodrome!” Did you really expect it to be under a pile of old boxes?

They finally get around to a giant underground cavern with giant tank treads, but the trail is cut off by a cave-in. Splinter tells them to go around, while he’ll go through. Uh, why not burrow through, and have the Turtles just squeeze in behind him?

Meanwhile, Shredder goes to the gang of thugs who were chasing April in the last episode, and offers them power, strength, and revenge against the Turtles. For some reason, they only really care about that last part.... which is funny, considering that Shredder’s obsession with them later in the series could be classified as a mental illness.

So what’s he doing? Well, he takes two guys, straps ‘em down, brings in the rhino and warthog, and opens a can of sparkly pink stuff. Eek, unicorn spit!

The Turtles, meanwhile, manage to bumble out into an open street in the middle of the day, with no disguises. They are failing at ninjaing.

Also, April’s boss is kind of a douchebag, since he apparently wasn’t concerned that after doing a report on sword-wielding thieves... and after her camera crew openly abandoned her to a gang of murderous thugs... she went missing for days. Did nobody call the police? Nope, he’s just pissed at her for going missing.

The Turtles have somehow gotten new disguises that in no way disguise the fact that they’re bald green animal-people.

Yeah, he’s wearing a jacket and sunglasses. I’m suddenly blind to the obvious.

Also, weren’t they supposed to meet up with Splinter on the other side of that cave-in? Why are they relying on April to find the Technodrome for them? Especially since her main lead is, “Robots stole animals.”

Speaking of which, Splinter finds it... and is immediately abducted by a robot. I bet he wishes he had just told the Turtles to follow him.

“If this hole caves in, we can dig ourselves out. You can’t.” Erm, are you really experienced at digging?

They all drop a few hundred feet next to the Technodrome... and I’m suddenly wondering why nobody has just glanced down the hole and seen what’s down there. Or at least put up some safety barriers. Someone’s gonna fall down there and sue a LOT.

Oh, and to double on “April’s boss is a douchebag,” he refuses to send her a camera crew until she has a story to report.... even though she’s only at the zoo because he gave her a story to report.

Fun fact: if I had ever wanted a career in journalism as a child, this series would have killed it.

The Turtles go inside the Technodrome, where Shredder starts doing the crushy-closing-walls thing that Star Wars made famous. I love that apparently he set up this giant war machine to have booby traps just in case he wanted to do something like this.

So they almost get squished flat, but of course some quick rewiring of a control panel allows Donatello to turn it off. Then robots attack them... and then MORE robots attack them, this time in a manufacturing plant.

Sorry, i just can’t imagine what those things manufacture. What does the giant smiley-faced spider-drone do? Or the cube on tentacles? Or the bipedal claw machine? Or the thing that exists entirely to thump things flat?

“We were trained to fight people, not can openers.” Well, it’s all theory, Raphael. The fact is, the public is way more comfortable with people beating the shit out of can openers.

Seriously, what manufacturing function does that serve? It’s a multi-armed thingy with flying saw-blades. 

Also, Michelangelo’s nunchuks are apparently made out of the tree of life, because he can smash right through metal with them. Not just once, either. He does it several times in a row.

Indiana Jones laughs at your pain. Fortunately Donatello happened to pick up a bomb in the last fight, and they can blow the door open right before the thing has a chance to crush them. Again, Shredder apparently set up all these traps... without a particular goal in mind.

Fortunately for the running time, they bumbled right into the chamber where Splinter is hanging from the ceiling, looking oddly sheepish.

But before they can get him down, Shredder comes in and reveals that he’s in fact Oroku Saki, and he wants them to join the Foot Clan. Why should they? Because he was accidentally responsible for them being mutated because he tried to kill Splinter. Which is like saying, “I date-raped your mom and got her pregnant, so you owe me because you exist.” Shockingly, this brilliant logic doesn’t win them over to his side.

Shredder calls in his own mutants, Bebop and Rocksteady, who are strong and intimidating (for now) but are also dumb as a sack of hammers. The Turtles grab Splinter and leave, and head right back up to the surface. Bebop and Rocksteady follow them up, and the Turtles trick them into a zoo cage. April takes some footage of them, since she apparently can’t get any of the Technodrome, and they’re dragged back underground by more of those annoying robots.

Seriously, is someone gonna cordon off the holes in the ground?! This whole place could collapse.

Verdict

This episode was a slight improvement over the first, possibly because they didn’t have to cram in all the backstory. It’s a pretty simple search-and-fight story, with some diversions along the way. I’m still not sure how or why the Turtles bothered to get disguises that didn’t disguise them at all, for instance. And they kinda bumbled out of the sewer in front of dozens of people. But it had minimum silliness, and it kept on its plot pretty well.

The animation is still gorgeous, especially in the fight scenes; sometimes the turtles’ faces can be a bit blobby, but the bodies and motion are absolutely top-rate. 

It also introduces us to our secondary villain Krang, who doesn’t really do much in this episode besides nag Shredder and make croaking noises. That seems to be a pattern thus far; the villains don’t do much when first introduced, then the do stuff in the next episode. Shredder’s much more active here, and he’s still pretty intimidating, despite the suckiness of his “join me and we can rule the galaxy” speech.

Gotta mention that this is where I like Bebop and Rocksteady the most in this series. They’re still too easily defeated, but they aren’t the cartoonish buffoons just yet. Ain’t quite up to IDW standards, though, where they’re dumb as hell but also scary.

Overall, a good chapter two to this five-part arc.

Grade: A