#asks;; i tend to annoy people

[eldragon-x]

Saw someone say that they don't understand being attracted to fictional characters because its like being attracted to a math problem which is so funny to me because I think me being only into fictional characters makes me understand objectum and conceptum people better

[newlacesleeves]

what do you tell yourself when you run to motivate yourself 😔 ive been running more esp because cross country seasons started up again (only on the team cause im manager xoxo) and i wanna get better!! God willing 😭

omg hello! first of all, so cool that you do cross country running and you're the manager!

honestly, the best way to be a better runner is to keep running. consistency is key. just in the last two months i've been running between 5-6 days every week and my pace, mileage, and form have improved SO MUCH.

i try to give myself small, achievable goals every time i go for a run. can i keep up a good pace for the whole 3 miles? can i extend my mileage by a quarter? a third? did i at least try to do that? if i can say i gave it my best shot then even if my run is shitty (like this morning) i can feel pretty good about it!

my biggest motivation is just remembering how much i enjoy running. i absolutely love it and i'm always chasing that feeling where my brain is finally quiet and my body is just moving like a perfect machine. even when i feel frustrated i try to remember that i'm working on it and every run i do is helping me to become a better runner so i can enjoy that feeling for longer.

(also a good playlist. i have 7 different playlists that are just for running depending on my mood and all the songs have similar beats so i use them kind of like a metronome. if the playlist ain't hitting, i switch it up and that helps.)

come share your runs with me ANY TIME i am so happy to cheer you on from the sidelines!! you got this!!!

[funnierasafictive]

some advice i see a lot regarding how to tell if someone is a fictive or just a character that the person is imagining is to try to imagine them doing something they wouldn't and see if it feels wrong or if they flat out refuse but i was wondering is there any way to tell if you've just imagined them refusing? like, if it's more in character for them to do so is that not simply where your mind would go? how can you tell whether there's a person behind it or whether it's just that your mind itself doesn't want to cooperate??

Honestly, I'm not sure how to answer that. BUT, it does remind me of when our old host met Jaiden (not a fictive) and they read that a way to check if someone is really sentient, you do this specific exercise about balancing a feather on their noise or something. Honestly none of us remember the point of it or how it would have worked, but what happened was, Jaiden was already Real. He split real, Jamie just wasn't sure (thank you denial). Because Jaiden cared about Jamie, he indulged him and did the exercises. But it would go on for DAYS to the point where Jaiden literally told Jamie to just "stop". "I'm real!" and even if Jamie told him to do these exercises, it was annoying him.

So yes, having them do something they'd like is an option. But have you considered annoying them to the point where they snap at you?? SKDFJS

OF COURSE DONT like. put yourselves on bad terms. but its something to think about. A lot of the time when we're in denial, the person we/the current front is in denial about, starts getting annoyed, and then we feel bad about hurting their feelings.

So I'm not your therapist and I can't tell you what's what- but I guess you could also think.. "If I annoyed them, and they react badly to me annoying them, and that feeling of them scolding me makes me feel bad.. why would I ever make that up?"

Also give it some time. Sometimes if a split is new (or you think someone just split) it'll be hard to tell. Denial is a BITCH. If you already are used to having alters or system members in general, The fictive who just split WILL eventually be comfortable enough to be "concrete enough" with you, if they already even know who they are. maybe your brain itself is still figuring things out. We talk about splitting as a community a lot--where spliting is usually depicted as like this FAST thing. but sometimes its slow! which DOESNT help if youre trying to figure out if you have someone or not!

[poor-ciceros-voring-again]

I really need some gravity falls friends I think :(

[battywitch]

Top 5 books you would suggest to sb to get them into reading 😀

*suddenly forgets every book I've ever read* uuuhhhh.... maybe

Percy Jackson series

Murderbot Diaries

Saga, or Sarah Andersen's comics, depending on the person

Wayward Children series

maybe A Good Girl's Guide to Murder

Thanks!

[tracle0]

How to give good feedback on art (from an artist)

I often see people talk about how they want to leave good comments on art, but don’t know how/don’t know what to say. As an artist, here’s what I often look for to have something to say to other people!

The composition of the art – how different elements of the piece guide your eye, how certain parts are brighter against darker backdrop/darker against a bright backdrop. What catches your attention? How have they put the piece together to make this happen?

The lighting/shading – how have they rendered the piece? Do you like how the lighting is bright, harsh lines, or how it’s gently blended in? Do the shadows add extra depth that makes the whole piece look more 3D? Did they use funky, unconventional colours to shade?

The lineart – is it smooth? Sketchy? Are the lines thick or thin? Do they use lines at all? Are they in a colour other than black? How does it add to the piece? Do they just outline a piece, or add texture with lineart as well?

The colours – have they used a pallet of complimentary colours? Do they remind you of something specific – perhaps to the fandom, or to a season, an aesthetic, etc? Do they only use one colour? Do they use unconventional colours? Do they have one pop of contrasting colours against a monochrome background?

The anatomy – do they stick to exact proportions? Do they lean towards a more cartoon sizing? Is it like Powerpuff Girls, or like Tim Burton? 90s anime, or modern day anime? Do they make things very angular, or really smooth? What about it do you like specifically?

The texture – in the frame of digital art especially, have they used a specific brush to create a certain effect? Do you like how sketchy it all looks, or how they’ve blended the colours together? Does it look like watercolours bleeding, or a stamp/print made over the entire piece? Is it all rough, or super smooth?

The details – talk about how you love the tiny pattern on a blanket, or the multiple earrings in the characters ear. Talk about how you like how they’ve done the hair, or the little glint of light against a ring. Talk about the celtic patterns in the body, or the crooked teeth in their smile. Little things that jump out to you.

How it makes you feel – anything at all, but try to explain what in the piece evokes it strongest. Are you hit with isolation by the lonely figure in a wind-swept hill? Or joy, does that bright smile make your heart swell? Try and pick something out and babble about that.

Any meaning you can pick out – a little more tricky and often quite personal, but if you can pick something out that you think you can interpret, talk about it! I don’t think people ever get offended, even if you’re wrong – it’s interesting to see how other peoples brains work, and what they take away from something you’ve made.

Anything that stands out to you as a signature of Their Art – typically for artists you’ve followed for a long time – when you look at a piece, do you think ‘oh, this is by X’. How do you know? Is it how they draw the mouths? How they shade? The anatomy? The details? The colours? The composition? The expressions? Tell them!

I try to mix and match a few of these, focusing on things specific to the piece. Talking in depth about a piece helps an artist to know you haven’t just glanced it over and gone ‘oo cool!’ and moved on. If you want Tumblr to continue having a thriving art community, it’s beneficial to engage in and spread art around, as well as letting the artist know their work was seen and appreciated. They put the work out there for you to see for free! What can take you a few minutes of your day can make their entire week. Go support your artist friends!

[drag0nalias0]

Shoutout to Nie Huaisang for being the most relatable mdzs character

[aeoris4lovers]

i hope verin doesn't fight essek to let him touch him. i hope he respects his boundaries.

i think it’s worth keeping in mind that, while i see a lot of people headcanon essek as touch averse, that’s never actually established as canon. we see him act annoyed or put out by physical affection (the group hug at the blooming grove), not really know what to do with himself when he gets it (jester hugging him at the outpost), and reject it when it’s being used to manipulate him (caleb squeezing his arm while trying to persuade him), but we never really see him outright reject it or express that it genuinely bothers him.

so i don’t think he really dislikes being touched in and of itself, i just think part of him sees it as silly and unnecessary because he saw love and relationships in general as silly and unnecessary for a long time, and i think verin would say “fuck that” and do it anyway just like jester and the rest of the nein do because he knows essek well enough to know he doesn’t actually dislike it, he just avoids it on principle. it’s less that he hates being touched, and more he hates that he doesn’t hate it, you know? and i think verin would be the last person to care about letting essek uphold that cold, i-don’t-need-anyone facade.

not to mention, i don’t know if you have siblings but i do and i can tell you that a certain amount of boundary pushing is basically a sibling love language — when you know a person that well, you know what will annoy them versus what will cross a line and how to tell when their reaction goes from being annoyed to being genuinely upset, so you can fuck with them a lot without really hurting them. essek might roll his eyes and go stiff and complain the whole way when verin hugs him, but verin would know him well enough to know that’s not what it looks like when he’s actually upset so it’s safe to keep doing it anyway.

i imagine verin always knew essek enough to know he secretly enjoyed the affection verin showed to him, even if he acted like it was the stupidest thing in the world. so when i say essek doesn’t fight it anymore, i don’t mean there was a time when verin would literally force essek to take the affection, i mean essek always accepted it but had to put on a show of hating it while he took it because he felt like it went against the person he was trying to be and he couldn’t let anyone know he liked it.

[idiosyncraticrednebula]

I love Naveen as both a character and a fictional crush, respectively, but I find his fandom to be quite... insufferable.

[phatcatphergus]

Another thing that lowkey makes me dislike the frubbo storyline sometimes is the way chat is so weird about it even off the server. Any time the topic of irl relationships comes up there are always chatters spamming about Fred and it’s not funny it’s just weird. Tubbo himself has had to tell them off for not separating real life and minecraft before. Even on the late night MaxGGs stream that just happened there was still someone who felt the need to bring up Fred in the middle of a genuine discussion and the stream was only at like 300 viewers. It’s a little sad how much fan reactions can sour the viewing experience but it’s not really possible to fully ignore stuff like that on live streamed content with chat right there on the screen.

People that do this shit make me angrier then I would like to admit as a God fearing woman who confesses my problems with anger regularly.

Part of it is because it’s a long and obnoxious pattern of fandom space that doesn’t seem to go away, but the fact that it’s been happening to Tubbo for so long and so persistently is something that truly enrages me. I don’t think there’s been a point in his career that people didn’t associate him with another person, and we all know how insane some of those beeduo people were. Even before beeduo people were asking about other people and bringing up Tommy when it wasn’t appropriate or needed. Especially referencing or talking about lore characters very much outside of rp.

People doing this shit is something I find it hard to just say “oh it’s just a constant, can’t do anything about it” and leaving it because Tubbo himself said he saw himself and his career as an extension of his friends and undermined his own achievements, goals and projects because of it.

The behavior isn’t new, but the fact that now people pushing tubbo into being associated with an NPC character is disgusting. It not only shows how little these people know of his lore, but also how they never saw Tubbo as his own person in the first place. Irl and in rp.

I will say that some of it is young fans trying to be funny or make a statement, but that doesn’t excuse them from the fact that it’s inappropriate. Especially when it’s in other peoples chat or during a conversation that has ZERO correlation.

I think the bottom line is that fandom spaces have never treated Tubbo well. They see him as a character that they can treat however they want and he only exists to “be with someone” or continue someone else’s plot both in rp and irl. He’s never been seen as his own person outside of his own fanbase and it will continue for however long this fandom space does.

[brittlebutch]

the thing is, you’re absolutely right! because what neurotypical people sometimes don’t understand is the massive difference between the average level of social interaction that they themselves vs other people get outside of organized or scheduled events like work or school, and also don’t understand the massive difference between what failure looks like, and how those two things overlap. i’m told that among the average neurotypical person, they’ll make a point to talk to people in their lives or hang out with friends or go on dates or chat with other people in public spaces, al to have casual interactions, multiple times a day, multiple days a week. meaning, if they have a failed social interaction, it’s buffered by the many successful interactions they’ll go on to have. failure most likely won’t mean complete isolation, because they have multiple avenues of interaction to fall back on. and, moreover, a failure in a social interaction when you have (on average) fewer than most means that now rather than that person going “oh that was a weird interaction, i talk to them a lot and it’s not usually like that, maybe it was an off day” they go “huh i don’t know that person very well maybe they’re just like that?”, which means that the odds are way different on whether relationships stay good after mistakes.

social skills are not actually as inherent as neurotypical people like to think. it’s just that when you’re always in practice, always getting back on the proverbial horse, the advice “just get back out there!” does actually work very well. but if you’re not able to do that for any variety of reasons, you can’t play the game the same way. my advice is not “try harder”, it’s “lower your expectations for yourself on what a good interaction and a moment of connection might be”. just as it’s possible you’re somehow unintentionally upsetting people, it’s possible you’re unintentionally making them feel happy, or valued, or heard, even in small, passing interactions. remind yourself that you’re working with fewer resources and a much more limited data pool. a lot of the advice being given is coming from someone who assumes they understand what the math looks like for you, because it’s very difficult to imagine that other side. so instead of trying to overlay a system made for someone who has resources that you just don’t have, you need to figure out what a functional system of interaction looks like for you, and adapt the advice given to fit your situation. my advice, bearing that in mind, is that finding communities and groups can look like a lot of different things, and getting your social needs met can come from a lot of sources, and ideally should! you would understand best what your situation is, and there’s no shame in changing tact to accommodate for your own needs and boundaries.

forgot to answer this for a bit lol BUT yeah, the post was a little bit more about the Conceptual argument than it was about me specifically, so I'm definitely already with you re: 'finding out what your Individual social goals are and working based off of those instead having high expectations based off of other people's metric' stuff. You definitely have a huge point with the "social buffer disparity" between NT people and ND people, where failures are both less demoralizing internally and less impactful externally when you're able to have a greater average of interactions generally also

but I really appreciated the "just as it’s possible you’re somehow unintentionally upsetting people, it’s possible you’re unintentionally making them feel happy, or valued, or heard, even in small, passing interactions" aspect of this message. I do definitely have a recurring problem of like, labeling Myself as an Uncanny Valley Person and automatically assuming that every interaction I'm involved in must be some level of uncomfortable for the other person -- it actually was kind of a revolution moment reading this and realizing that OH it does make sense that if I can unintentionally make people uncomfortable, it's statistically just as likely that I can unintentionally lift people's spirits in one way or another! So thank you very much for that!!

[jokest3r]

I wish I had someone to draw with silently without them poking or criticizing every little thing. I just want to be a little peaceful

[rainingincale]

Once you cut your hair short, you never go back. If you were looking for a sign to have a big chop, this is it! Mwahahhaahahaaa

[ssaalexblake]

Some people on this site are So rude and mean over the most inconsequential bullshit that it’d be funny if it wasn’t actually hurtful. 

[marshmallowprotection]

So there was a mysme chat event, I forgot which one it was but it was V-centric, with his opening line being "Did you know that it takes 365 days for the earth to orbit around the sun?" Ofc it's a rhetorical question and serves as an opening for a poetic, romantic message. But tbh I can't stop cracking up at that 'fun fact'... "No, I didn't know it took that many days for the earth to orbit, tell me more"

That's Jihyun Kim. He speaks in poetry, symbolism, and riddles. He is an eccentric artist that is dodging his emotions by hiding them under a dozen different quotes and statements. He's always skewed toward being the pretentious type in terms of how he handles his view of art and the medium it comes with. It makes you want to laugh or rip out your hair depending on who you are. I get a lot of people who're like, "If V doesn't start making sense when he talks, I'm going to scream."

He's just like that, babes. That's who he is. If you love him, you accept him for the metaphorical nonsense he spouts. I think it's endearing... when it's done in a way where I know he's healing and on the path to recovery... not when he's dodging his problems by calling Rika a sun that's melted away the wax layers of his wings, or when he says that he made the daffodil wilt in his garden by giving it too much light in the mornings.