#back on my SWTOR bullshit

[what-wait-why]

She <3

[bioticgoddess]

SWOTR

Some of you know I played SWTOR back about a decade ago. Well, I've returned to it recently and this time and am determined to play all 8 main stories. Am currently replaying my Jedi Knight and her Bounty Hunter twin from start.

I have recently discovered the Corso Riggs romance path and uh...yea...can confirm I have a type in this stor. My (as yet to be created) Smuggler gal will be romancing him. Dude is a dork and I approve of dorks. (Reasons my Bounty Hunter will alway romances Torian.)

So yea. Had some giggles thanks to YouTube and the 10yrs late going back to SWTOR. Also, since I'm doing one light side story paired with a dark side story, the Smuggler is paired with the Sith Inquisitor when I get to them.

[artsubject13]

[zephhhhh]

████

[sky-scribbles]

Therons my name and when I come to spoopy ship to save my mom My blasters I did not bring with - I have no choice. I punch the Sith.

[knamil]

Die a rare-shipper or live long enough to see it made canon.

[tiredassmage]

ALUCREN ELLERY / CIPHER ELEVEN & TEXT POSTS

A friend got me going on about agent endings again, so I finally gave this jackass his facelift.

[garaviel]

Mmmmrgh trying to get back into my sith warrior to shuffle her thru the expansions but. Idk im not feeling it

[radetzkymarch]

Resubbing to SWTOR once again to bring you all the most cursed screenshots

[vespertine-legacy]

Tulia, setting foot on Dromund Kaas, seeing a Sith Lord make everyone in the room feel like they're going to shit their pants and die: Was anyone going to simp for that bastard?

[sullustangin]

(stares at clock)

oh, wow, 11k words and counting.  Yikes.

(needs to go to bed, wants to finish fanfic update)

(sleep wins)

[squirrelno2]

When you don't know if you have a job and the job in question starts in a week and you can't write your novel or your fanfictions because your files are inexplicably corrupted and you live alone over an hour from everyone in your life (if not significantly more) and your brain doesn't even have the decency to hang on to your most recent hyperfixation

If you have ever wondered anything about anything I've made please please tell me I'm losing my mind and can no longer distract myself without help

[tearlessrain]

Tagged by @dingoat (thanks!!)

3 ships

okay so this is going to be 100% ocs but right now

My Sith Warrior Kalarros and @darth-bagel's smuggler/crimelord Sylvas. look it's basically just canon at this point, I love these two, I love their relationship. it could be argued that it's not really romantic, they're both married to other people and have a few other relationships (all consensually to be clear, they're not having an affair they're both very poly). Sylvas's husband was actually the one who originally set them up for some bdsm shenanigans (because honestly the only reason Kalarros isn't a pro dom is it's never occurred to him to charge for it, and said husband is also a Sith who'd considered Kalarros a friend for years prior to that and trusted him to look after Sylvas and treat them well) and they clicked spectacularly and developed a strong bond over the years. At this point they're so entwined with each other's stories that I've pretty much abandoned my original canon for Kalarros because it's just vastly improved with Sylvas in it lol. they've stuck by each other through some rough times on both sides and consider each other much more than casual play partners by now.

Khatte and another of Bagel's ocs, their bounty hunter Liz. honestly these two are just a lot of fun and kind of happened by accident, we had minimal involvement in this they just decided to develop a mutual crush and now Khatte has firmly entered his femdom era. it honestly wouldn't have worked pre Alliance era, Liz has zero tolerance for his bullshit and Khatte is significantly better at keeping his bullshit in check with some legitimate therapy under his belt. It's fairly casual but probably one of the healthiest relationships he's ever had just because he knows she won't settle for less and he likes her enough to meet those standards. what can I say, Khatte's type is people who could kill him and Liz's type (at least when it comes to men) is "extremely competent but also kind of pathetic" so of course they saw each other and instantly had to fuck.

taking an abrupt turn from SWTOR into BG3, my Durge (or half of my Durge) Ryldimar and @elaphaemourra's Tav Dragonfly. listen I did not particularly even like Durge as a concept until these two happened. [SPOILERS REDACTED I FUCKED UP SOME PEOPLE I TAGGED HAVEN'T PLAYED DURGE YET]

First Ship

I'm honestly not sure? technically this might also be ocs, because I was writing original fiction before I ever got into fandom spaces and even then I've never really actively shipped canon characters from other media that much (I passively ship a lot of things but I don't get that invested yknow?). so it's probably Talon and Iadra, my gryphons from a fantasy thing I started writing in high school and have been continuously developing for the last fifteen years or so. Talon is actually half gryphon, in this world gryphons are shapeshifters and are capable of both assuming a humanoid form and interbreeding with that planet's closest human analog (and also humans, theoretically, though I'm unclear on whether any of them have gotten to earth and tested that, the worldbuilding kind of got away from me and it's a beautiful mess now). gryphons bond for life the way a lot of predatory birds do and these two are completely devoted to each other, and also they have the fun aesthetic element of Talon being about 1/3 Iadra's size when she's in gryphonic form (due to an Incident™, he lost one of his wings years ago and it caused him to be stuck between forms, so he mainly looks like a slightly feathery Guy with a singular wing. about what you'd expect of an oc I made in high school but I love him okay).

Last Song

uuuh the Ken Theriot cover of The Witch of the Westmereland I think.

Currently Reading

honestly I have not been doing a lot of reading lately (been meaning to get back to it but yknow) but I'm in the middle of The Black Gryphon by Mercedes Lackey

Last Film

OG Star Wars, couple days ago my internet went out and that was one of three movies I happen to have on my hard drive (take a wild guess what the other two are)

Currently Craving

Salmon chirashi. I literally always want any iteration of raw salmon combined with sushi rice. fortunately I'm refilling my meds in a few days (to be clear the meds are unrelated to my love of salmon, there just happens to be a really good sushi place within a block of my pharmacy so I get chirashi whenever I need to pick something up)

tagging (only if you want to!): @elvhenyoung, @elaphaemourra, @mercurypilgrim, @darkshadeless, @vampiraptor, @reucrion, @artpigeons, @chaoticspacefam

[corruptlight]

Oh, My Love - A SWTOR Story

In which the Commander gets stabbed on Nathema instead of Theron Shan.

Its me back on my bullshit instead of sleeping (help) and I've been in SWTOR brainrot for a long while now and I keep thinking and creating stories based off my silly little swtor characters.

This isn't edited by the way

"I love you Theron, please, come home." Lana shuts off the holo and Sylvi begins to leave the room. Not saying a word as Lana watches sadly, knowing it was better not to say anything.

"I'm going for a walk in the woods, clear my mind." Was all she said before leaving, and not even going towards the woods. Sylvi heads for a secret shared apartment that no one knew off except her, Theron, and C2-N2.

It was for her to stop Theron being a workaholic and sleep and for her to get away from the alliance and being its commander. She lazily opens the door, before walking towards the lounge and slumping onto it. Too lost in her mind, the only thing keeping her going had ceased to exist and she finally tumbled down into a dark abyss of depression, shame, and self-loathing.

><><><

"I swear when I get my hands on him-" Trygve starts while Ingrid and Víðarr stand with him in the field where the former Cipher Nines ship resides.

"Trygve..." Víðarr starts but Trygve swirls to face him with a firm finger pointed at him.

"HE WILL FEEL EVERY AGONY, EVERY FORM OF TORTURE POSSIBLE FOR WHAT HE DID. I WILL SEE HIM BREAK FOR WHAT HE DID TO HER!" Trygve yells, making Ingrid flinch to hide behind Víðarr making the male twin sigh and calm himself slightly at her behavior.

"Brother, we will find him. I promise you, and we will make him pay," Víðarr assures, "But, you cannot deny something about this is off."

Ingrid moves from her position slightly behind the Sith, opening her mouth to say something before her comlink goes off.

"Ingrid here," She says while answering it.

"Its Hylo, we've found the pirate that keeps raiding the transports." Hylo Viz explains before disconnecting, making Ingrid close her eyes.

"I'll go, I sense something about this that's... familiar." Ingrid says to the brothers.

"Sense what?" Trygve quizzes, making Ingrid smile slightly.

"I sense someone that I'll love until the stars go cold." The Zabrak then turns on her heel and walks away with haste.

"Andronikos revel." Víðarr whispers with a small smirk.

"That pirate that helped her recover Tulak Hord's artifact on Tatooine?" Trygve asks.

"How do you-- another time. Lets go find Lana and figure our next move to find Theron."

"Vaylin! You have too stop her!"

"It is a tainted world."

"The Force is... wrong here."

"There are things in there even I cannot protect you from."

Sylvi shoots up in a sweat, another nightmare plaguing her sleep, however, this time it felt like a warning from the Force.

"Nathema..." She whispers before springing to her feet, half consciously, half on auto-pilot.

She needed to leave Odessen, without anyone knowing, following or finding her. Suddenly feeling like she was in a jail, she checked her armor before clipping her dualsaber to her belt. She walks to her wardrobe and finds a black cloak, heaving it over herself she pulls her hood up and leaves the apartment.

She blocks off all her bonds and shrouds her force signature, suppressing it from the force users all over the planet. She knew she had to take a ship without a tracker on it, or land then use the auto-pilot to send it adrift in the galaxy.

'That would throw them off my scent.' Sylvi realizes before maneuvering to the hanger. It was midnight and no sane person would be up unless they were on patrol.

The raven haired Jedi peeks around the corner, seeing an officer on patrol. Though she hated it, Sylvi forces them into a sleep before gently having them fall to the ground and running across to the fighters. She looks around before force leaping onto a fighter, once she does she hears voices coming towards the hanger before they notice her sleeping soldier.

"Over there!" Admiral Aygo calls out before getting onto the comms and shouting orders for flight control. Because the group couldn't identify Sylvi, they figured her to be a spy, saboteur, or assassin and that was a means for capture at any cost.

"Sithspit." Sylvi curses under her breathe before getting the ship fired up and getting ready to fly out.

In her quarters, Ingrid stirs feeling a heavy and firm arm around her waist. The Zabrak hears her comm beeping and uses the force to bring it to her.

"This better be important." Ingrid hisses.

"Ingrid! We have a situation in the hanger with an unknown assailant attempting to flee in a fighter. Their intent is unknown and they appear to be a force user!" Aygo explains making her groan, feeling the person behind her start to wake.

"I might not be able to get there in time." Ingrid replies, while attempting to move but the arm around her waist keep her flush to the persons chest.

"Understood, we will attempt to detain them." Aygo tells her before she turns off her commlink.

"Andronikos..." Ingrid starts but the pirate wasn't letting her go.

"Forget them, they've got it handled." He tells her lazily, planting kisses on her shoulders and gently taking the commlink and throwing it somewhere.

"This is important."

"So? You've skipped out on dark council meeting for less." Andronikos argues, not letting her go after getting her back. The pirate moves towards the Zabraks neck slowly, knowing it would help his argument for her to stay.

"Yes... I... I know this, but..." She keeps trailing off, finding it difficult to speak, and Andronikos smirks knowingly.

"But, Sith?"

Sylvi gets the fighter moving and knows Aygo and attempting to comm her, but she left it in the staging area so he wasn't getting an answer. She watches as he sends men to go find her in what most assumed were her private quarters.

Once she finds the opportunity she flies out of the hanger and into the atmosphere while getting the hyperdrive ready and finding the tracker at the same time.

Eventually, finds two wires she remembers her brothers telling her were for the tracker and weapons.

"Blast, which one was it." Sylvi asks herself before deciding to pull them both out.

What could go wrong?

As she pulls the wires an alarm start blaring to tell her weapons were disabled. She groans before glancing to see if she was clear to jump.

"Flying is for droids." She grumbles before entering hyperspace.

Leaving her with only her thoughts and the stars.

[rat-pagi]

Kaleesh Week Day 2 - Empire

Two Kaleesh Imperial characters (one canon, the other technically canon, but emotionally an oc)

Bentilais san Sk'ar: Him, again! When the Empire invades his planet (it's not like they'd just leave it alone after all, even after the whole Grievs-Palpatine thing), he strikes a deal with the emperor to take the position of planetary governor. In exchange? He employs the bioengineering acumen of San Pharmaceuticals (no relation to the San Banking clan) to some of the Emperor's more...clandestine projects.

(Yes, he is partially responsible for all the 'Emperor's back' bullshit in Episode IX, I apologize on his behalf) You can't just work for the Emperor though, and eventually he gets mired deeper and deeper into other projects...black ops...military campaigns...all in the name of saving Kalee, though, right? So, that's where that nine-foot tall vampire-looking guy comes in-- It's Sk'ar, but he's messed around with his own biology for the sake of combat optimization (And since some of this is chemical, it does fuck with his brain as well).

It also doesn't strike him as a bad thing that he appears to outsiders as less Kaleesh in this form, since he's acting on the Emperor's behalf, and, well, the planet's name has already been dragged through the mud enough. Yet it is fairly isolating in an environment where he already has to hide much of himself and his culture to survive (not so fun fact, the caps on his toes are there because Kaleesh claws tend to leave marks on most types of flooring; in most inter-species spaces, it's an act of courtesy for an individual Kaleesh to wear them (like humans and deodorant)...in the Empire, not so much a choice). ...But all in the name of saving Kalee, right? This, of course, is an entirely different perspective than the other character in this picture, his younger brother.... (this little shit (affectionate) vv)

Vanev san Esha: Born the youngest of the five San siblings, Esha was more or less destined to be the odd one out. Whereas the others had each taken on roles in their family, by child number five, there wasn't really much space left. If that wasn't enough to set him apart, he was also born Force Sensitive-- hardly a bad thing, but it did mean that he was born with an entirely different set of talents and senses than most in his clan had seen in generations. Or knew what to do with. Couple that the status, free time, and burgeoning resentment that goes along with being the fifth heir to Aschal-Kalee's ruling family, and his connection to the Force started to bring out his worst instincts. 'Started' though, is not 'did so unashamedly' and for a long time, the sense of restraint and general secretiveness that had been trained into him as a San, as well as the influence of his eldest brother-- Veshitar, heir to the San family khanship, and all-around decent guy-- kept him from...shall we say, doing his worst. Then an off-world diplomatic meeting goes terribly wrong, both Vesh and his father are killed, and the entire San family is left scrambling for a new heir. Esha is mourning, enraged, and most of all, believes it his right as his brother's protégé to become the next khan. The rest of the family chooses his brother, Bentilais, anyways. He almost raises a coup in response to this (mostly imagined) slight (an action that, given his raw power would have undoubtedly dealt a great blow to the San clan), but something makes him hesitate and he fucks off to the cliffside where they buried his brother's body instead. There he gains a new, even more troubling path, along with a new teacher-- Xivkha Lar Rainik (shoutout to all my SWTOR fans!). Rainik is a thousand-year-old Sith lord, distantly related to the current San clan, and also very, very dead. He needs a young, reasonably healthy host to get out of the San family crypt, and Esha needs a teacher (yeah, once I start bringing up Kylo quotes, you know this is headed in a bad direction) in the Sith arts, so the arrangement works well for them both. It does not, however, work out well for Sk'ar and the rest of the San family. You see, Esha wants power, recognition-- all the things that he was denied in the San family-- and Rainik...well, Rainik has his own agenda. This brings them to the throne of the Sith-iest Sith of the age, Emperor Palpatine, where Esha decides to swear fealty to the Emperor. Vanev san Esha he is no longer, but Sixth Brother. And unlike his brother, what he is doing is most certainly not to save Kalee.

(Also, probably more relevantly than all that, he's that guy with the cool-looking crow mask who fights Ahsoka in Tales of the Jedi)

[abysskeeper]

Trick, mistake, secret and skin

This 100% did not start with me thinking Trick was one of the words

Yeah ok, my secret is that I'm always on my bullshit about Trick too. Another readmore because I uh...always always ramble hard about my girl.

skin: How comfortable is your OC in their skin? Do they grapple with anything that lives inside them—a beast, a curse, a failure, a monster? How do they face the smallest, weakest, most horrible version of themself? Are they able to acknowledge it at all?

So, the key to writing Trick in any way, shape, or form is that she is, 99.9% of the time, never comfortable in her own skin and always contending with some type of monster writhing beneath her skin. Is she confident and capable in her abilities? Yes. Willing to lead and make the tough decisions? Yes. Self-assured and secure in who she is? No, never.

Is it a contradiction in a lot of ways? Yes, but the girl's a mess of martyr complexes and insecurities. She almost always, honestly believes she is the most horrible version of herself (a coward and a monster), and though she would only call herself as such in a conversation where it's directly referenced, she never denies the accusation and does all she can with her actions to try and make up for her perceived shortcomings. In reality, the worst version of herself is the girl who gave up for a time (there's usually some point in her history where she went selectively mute and actively tried to kill herself), and in that regard, Trick often pretends that girl actually succeeded. She rarely acknowledges that time existed, ashamed as she is by it, and on the rare chance it does come up...well, the ensuing conversation isn't pretty.

As for the monsters beneath her skin, it varies by verse, but she's usually contending with some type of darkness or beast that's a thinly veiled allegory for her rage, desperation, and trauma (because I'm like that). A few examples, in no particular order:

Pack-verse: In Trick's original universe (a dystopian urban fantasy/sci-fi mashup), she's a wolf shapeshifter who was experimented on as a kid, which ultimately resulted in the line between human and beast blurring within her. Meaning, she has a tendency to go partial-to-full werewolf when deeply upset, among other differences (improved senses, heightened instincts and reflexes, etc). She's terrified of her capabilities and tries to repress herself as much as possible, which only backfires. The whole character arc there is about her coming to terms with who she is and what happened to her, and accepting that that side of her (the rage, the desperation, the trauma) is not actually a bad thing (and is actually more heightened because of her human choices, not the animalistic ones).

SWTOR: I took the Jedi Consular story and ran with it. The effects of the Force plague linger after chapter 1, even after Morrhage is defeated. I figured that lending out your soul to protect fellow Jedi against a Dark plague probably means you don't get everything back properly, even if you did everything right. She doesn't suffer from corruption so much (I actually believe she's not corruptible because she learned the shielding technique), but she's almost constantly, subconsciously using the shielding technique on herself to battle off the bit of Darkness she inherited from those she shielded. Other parts of her are missing altogether. It causes her a lot of chronic pain, but over time she learns to deal with it...until chapter 3 when she secretly starts shielding the Children and accidentally inherits some of the Emperor's power. KOTFE and KOTET are the worst time of her life, and she never knew so much relief as when the Emperor finally died in EOO.

BG3: My new project and current brainrot. Trick's issues are a little different here, as she's dealing with divinity instead of darkness (her backstory fic I'm working on is literally subtitled "You've Been Touched by Something Holy"). Instead of dealing with darkness, she's dealing with the fact she's literally been touched by the God of Death and bares the scars (both physical and emotional. I'm using this as an excuse to finally make this a valid design and not just metaphorical) that set her apart from her peers. It's still very much a metaphor for her rage and grief, but has a new and exciting flavor that I'm still working out all the kinks of.

secret: What's one secret your OC never wants anyone to know about them?

Again, depends on verse, but Trick always has at least one, world shattering secret she's keeping to herself. Generally, no matter in what iteration, there are deaths in her past she doesn't want anyone knowing about. The numbers and her exact involvement often vary, but she always feels a sense of guilt for people she either directly or indirectly killed through her actions and/or inactions. Otherwise:

Pack-verse: Her primary secret she wishes no one knew is, exactly, the number of people she's been responsible for killing as an agent of the government. However, that isn't a secret she can hide, as most people know and/or remember her committing those crimes. Instead, the secret she's trying most to hide is the aforementioned experimentation and ensuing consequences. She doesn't want anyone to know just how monstrous she really is, and how utterly disgusted she constantly feels about herself.

SWTOR: She tries to take the fact she was born an Imperial slave to the grave, but it does come out eventually to the Republic or Alliance. Instead, the one thing she will take to the grave is what happened to her as a result of the shielding technique. She'll never speak a word about the non-corruption corruption (thus, she'll never ask for help) because she fears how people will view her or treat her if they ever knew. The only exception is Cipher Nine, sometimes, but that man can and will both take a secret to the grave and never once consider betraying her trust.

BG3: The fact she died and was resurrected by a God. It's kind of hard to avoid in full, given the golden scarring is a dead giveaway of something divine happening to her, but she doesn't easily share the full story. And having died and being resurrected stands in direct contrast to being a cleric (and unrealized Chosen) of Kelemvor, nevermind the fact it was Kelemvor who asked her to live and resurrected her in the first place. It's complicated.

mistake: What's the worst mistake your OC ever made? What led to them making it? Have they been able to fix it? How have they moved on?

Trusting Torren, in every verse. The worst mistake she ever made is trusting her...ex? Abuser? Mirror image and narrative foil? All of the above?

Regardless, Torren is always her worst mistake. She tried so hard to fix him, but he was one of those people who couldn't be helped, and did nothing but manipulate and use her further because of her goodwill. People got hurt and died because of it, no matter the verse. She got hurt (usually assaulted), no matter the verse. Torren is always the worst mistake, no matter what, and the only reason she ever trusted him was because she was young and naive and just wanted to help.

Usually Trick rectifies it by, eventually, killing him. It's the only way she feels like she can rectify everything he's done (to her and to others), and it is her burden to bare alone (though sometimes Tav insists on doing the honors). Even after he's dead though, it takes a long time for her to move on from everything that happened. When she has Tav, he usually helps facilitate her moving on quicker, but she can get there on her own with enough time away from the situation and a metric fuckton of painful self-reflection.