I am an adult pt 4
Hi. So this is pt 4 of the I am an adult. I really liked writing it and hope you enjoy it too. I definitely want to do a 5th part but I'm not sure about how many more after that I will do (if you get what I mean). Also, all of the German and Spanish is from google/google translate so if it's wrong, I apologise
Barca Femeni x Reader ; Lena Oberdorf x Reader
Part 1 : Part 2 : Part 3 : Part 3.5 : Part 4
Description: Lena gets the talk
Word Count: 4.1k
TW: Slight smut (undescribed/suggestive rather than outright)
You weren’t used to waiting at airports for people. Usually, you were the one who was walking off the plane to visit friends and family. But you couldn’t deny the excitement bubbling up – just thinking about who would be walking through the door made you smile. You didn’t quite know the protocol for meeting your long-distance girlfriend off a flight. You were nervous about it – wanting to do it right. You may have gotten into a bit of a TikTok wormhole over couples reuniting; most people went with flowers and a sign, but you were staying in an unfamiliar city for both of you, and you did have a match to play. It was something you agonised over for days before the arrival. Having consulted an unhelpful Ona, a laughing Patri and an amused Jana, you settled on asking Alexia. That was an adult thing to talk about, right?
“Um … Ale, can I … can I ask you something?” You said as you curled up on her sofa.
“Of course, pequeña. Esta todo bien?”
“Yeh, um … it’s about Lena, actually” That might have been a bad way to phrase it. Alexia’s face dropped, her gaze becoming a little icy.
“Que hizo ella?” Her voice was just as cold.
“Nothing, nothing, prometo.” You reassured her. “I wanted to ask you what to get her for the airport,” you explained quietly, a little apprehensive over her response.
“Oh, cariño.” Alexia cooed, pulling her legs up to tuck underneath her as she twisted to face you, her hand reaching along the back of the sofa to pick at the corner of the cushion. “Honestly, I don’t think she’d be expecting anything. I certainly wouldn’t if Olga and I met somewhere in the middle.” Her look softened even more as you nodded furiously, eyes locked on her patterned carpet. She could see you sag ever so slightly – clearly, you wanted to get Lena something. “I think, if you really want to get her something,” she continued, smiling as you perked up at her response. “You could do something small – like a … ugh, what’s the word …” She was so fluent in English you often forgot that it was technically her third language. “It’s small and fluffy; you give it to niñas,” she clicked frantically, clearly trying hard to remember. “Un oso de peluche,” she sighed, wracking her brain to remember the English word.
“A teddy bear?” You asked, helping her out slightly.
“Sí, sí, a teddy bear. You could get her one of those? It would be small enough for her to pack away when she travels, and it is something she can keep with her when she’s back in Germany.” You smiled at her suggestion – nodding happily at her words.
The day was finally here. You were finally seeing Lena again. Madrid airport was a little struggle to navigate but you stood, buzzing with excitement, as you waited at arrivals. You looked down at the goodies you had with you – a little bag filled with a very cute and very fluffy teddy bear, some Spanish sweets, and an iced coffee in your hand. You had also packed a few extra jumpers to sneak into Lena’s bag before she left.
L💚: Just got through passport control and stuff
L💚: I’ll be maybe 5/10 more mins
[Initial] ❤️💙: eeeeeeeeeeeeee
[Initial] ❤️💙: ok – I’m like right by the exit
[Initial] ❤️💙: turn left when u walk through it and im by the pillar post thingy
5 to 10 more minutes … you could do that. With every passing minute, your excitement and anticipation grew. It had been a long few months without Lena by your side. Yes, you texted every day; Yes, you Facetimed 5 times a week minimum; but seeing her in person, being able to hug her and hold her and kiss her and smell her and touch her and … you couldn’t be more excited.
“Hola, mi amor.” Very poorly pronounced Spanish whispered to you as strong, familiar arms wrapped around your waist.
“Lena,” you squealed, clearly having missed her walk up – far too much in your own head.
“mmmm, ich habe dich vermisst,” she sighed happily as you twisted in her grip to hug her tightly. She was warm and soft and smelt of cinnamon.
“I’ve mis- no, wait,” you cut yourself off. She tilted her head to the side, drawing back to look at you. “Ich habe dich auch so sehr vermisst,” you stumbled slightly but the big, wide grin on Lena’s face told you, you had said it right.
“Can I kiss you, Schatz?” she asked gently. You blinked slightly, not expecting her to ask you that in such a public space. “I, we, don’t have to. It’s just it’s been so long, and,” she rushed to get out, hating the fact that she had made you even the smallest bit uncomfortable.
“Liebe,” you cut her off, waiting until she looked at you before you continued. When her warm chocolate eyes met yours, you struggled not to float away in them. “Please, kiss me.” You smiled as she let out a breath of relief. You met halfway, and it was just as perfect as all the other kisses you two had shared, if not more so after such a long time apart.
“As …” she cleared her throat as she pulled away slightly. “As much as I want to continue. We should get going … but later, ich verspreche.” She vowed and picked her bag up off the floor. And extending her hand for you to take.
“No, wait, gimme that.” You gestured for her bag, forcing it from her when she hesitated to hand it over. “Also, these are for you,” you said with a proud smile, giving her the now slightly watery coffee and bag of goodies.
“Schatz, you shouldn’t have.” She began, but you shook your head, denying her the chance to complain. You stuck your tongue out at her, intertwined your fingers and pulled her towards the exit.
Taking the metro back to your hotel reminded you a lot of your first date. Lena looking slightly puzzled over the Spanish being spoken all around you. On your first date, you had shyly stood next to her, closer than two friends would be not enough to make her feel uncomfortable, and quietly translated a bit of the conversation between two girls nearby; you added the voices to differentiate between the two girls and jokingly copied any actions they did. This time, you let her lean against you, one arm sneaking around her waist to fiddle with the belt loops on her jeans and the other holding tightly onto the handrail. Her head dropped into your neck, muttering something in German.
“What was that, Liebe?” You asked softly, mindful that your mouth was quite close to her ear despite the busy train.
“Müde,” she said again into your neck. It took you a minute to sift through the German in your head. You pouted when you finally understood what she was saying. She was tired. That you could understand, travelling was difficult when you understood the language, let alone one where you landed in a country where the language was entirely different and almost no familiarity to yours. You pressed a chaste kiss to her hairline, hoping to comfort her a little.
“Naw,” you cooed. "It’s okay. We’re almost back to the hotel. We can have a nap if you want,” you pressed another kiss to her head. "But Alexia says she has to see you at some point tonight,” you reminded her.
“Forgot ‘bout Alexia,” she whined tiredly, her grip tightening on you.
“I’m sorry, Liebe. I promise she won’t be too harsh or scary. I know she can come off a bit..." you struggled for the right word. “Intense? But I promise she’s really sweet.”
You finally made it to your stop, and you filtered off the train, fingers laced together so neither of you got lost (mainly Lena, as she didn’t know a lick of Spanish). Just as you were walking up the steps outside, a flustered woman appeared next to you.
“Lamento mucho molestarte. Pero estoy intentando llegar al aeropuerto y tienes una maleta. Sabes cómo conseguirlos?” The flurry of Spanish through you off for a second as you had been conversing in English almost all day.
“No, no te preocupes en absoluto. Um, sólo necesitas …” As you explained the directions to the woman, Lena couldn’t help but watch in awe. She knew you could speak Spanish – you lived in Spain, you played for Barcelona, and she’d seen you talking in Spanish on the football pitch. Hell, the first time she had met you, you were finishing a conversation in Spanish with the film and media crews. It had done something to her then, and it was doing something to her now, too. She couldn’t understand a word of what you were saying, but the accent, the rapid words, the hand gestures, your kind smile … she suddenly wasn’t as tired as she felt on the train.
“Sorry, Liebe,” you said as you finished, waving to the woman as she sped down the steps towards the platform. She was asking about getting to the airport—she had seen your bag and guessed we had just come from there.” You explained, taking her (now slightly clammy) hand and leading her towards your hotel.
The hotel room was big and welcoming, a large bed in the centre with your things thrown haphazardly across it called to Lena as she walked through the door. She left her stuff by the wall and flopped heavily down, sighing at the softness that surrounded her. You looked at her from your vantage point by the door. Her top had ridden up, exposing her abs slightly, her biceps were on full display, and the veins in her arms rippled slightly as she twisted her fingers in the bedding underneath her. She was doing things to you – maybe it was because you hadn’t had sex a good few months (it was currently the longest you had ever gone without since you started having sex); maybe it was because she looked so at home amongst your things; perhaps it was the fact that your girlfriend was finally within touching distance. You also realised you didn’t quite care enough to figure it out.
“Incoming,” you yelled as you launched yourself at her.
“Oof,” she huffed, her breath leaving her body as your weight settled on top of her, both of you laughing quietly at your behaviour.
“Hi,” you smiled at her, arms either side of her head, legs straddling her hips.
“Hi,” she smiled back, lift her hands to stroke her thumbs across your exposed skin.
“I…” should you say it? “I’ve missed you,” you chicken out from what you really wanted to say. You knew you told her at the airport that you missed her, but you needed her to know just how much her absence affected you.
“I’m sorry.” She knew the distance was difficult for both of you. You shook your head, refusing to let her think that this was her fault.
“No, there’s nothing that can be done at the moment. I’m at Barca; you’re at Wolfsburg. It is what it is.” You shrugged, hoping it would ease her sadness a little. “But … you’re here now, we have this weekend. And that is all that matters.” You smiled, the wide, soft smile full of love and tenderness that only Lena got to see often. You felt rather than saw Lena crane her neck up to try to kiss you; your smile shifted into a cheeky grin as you pulled back just out of her reach. She stopped looking at you offendedly.
“Nuh, uh, uh,” you teased, your tongue darting out to wet your lips. “I...” You kiss her forehead. This was your chance. “Missed.” You kissed her cheek, backing out again. “You.” You kissed her other cheek.
“And I’ve missed you, Schatz.” Her hands left your waist, coming up to cradle your face, holding to exactly where she wanted. She waited a few moments, letting her eyes scan your face, trying to commit everything to memory (even though she had already done that well before you left Germany at New Year’s). “So much,” she whispered as she finally tugged you down to meet her lips.
The kiss started out slow, sweet and tender, as your love was poured into it. As you parted, her darkened eyes roamed your body, one hand cementing itself in your hair, tugging lightly as the other moved to trace along the waistband of your shorts. Your kisses weren’t a battle for dominance, but you were falling into a pattern of give and take that was uniquely yours. Your top was the first to come off, hers following not too long afterwards. Buttons were undone, drawstrings loosened and more clothing adding to the mess on the floor. Her hands grasped at any available flesh as your fingers slipped inside. Dark spots were bitten into supple skin, moans were melodies as you rediscovered each other.
“Don’t stop,” You panted into her skin as she guided you to the brink of ecstasy.
“Never,” came her reply, equally as breathless.
“What happened to being tired?” You laughed as she snuggled into your side, her once-eager fingers tracing light shapes into your skin. She groaned at your teasing, pressing more weight onto you. You fiddled with her hair as you waited for an explanation.
“Dein Spanisch. Mit dieser Dame am Bahnhof … Es hat etwas mit mir gemacht” You didn’t understand it fully. Spanish … train station? You were a little confused.
“Sorry, I got something about my Spanish and the lady at the train station. What was the last bit?” You were trying to learn German, but you had started with the most practical things – the greetings, stuff that happened in daily life, cheesy lines you could say to Lena to make her blush.
“Um … it’s a bit embarrassing, really … you were speaking Spanish to that lady at the station,” she blushed profusely. You just smiled, letting your fingers comb through the mess her hair had become. “Es war wirklich sexy.” Your grin doubled in size. So, you speaking Spanish turned her on? That was useful to know.
“Well,” you said after a moment of silence. “If me giving directions to the airport is sexy, you should hear me when I say something truly seductive,” you teased, squeezing her gently as she buried her head in your neck again.
“Mmmm, déjame pensar. Cuando llegue a casa, debo acordarme de llamar al administrador del edificio.” You laughed as you felt her blush, the new heat obvious against your skin. You also couldn’t help but notice the slight shift of Lena’s hips against your thigh. “Liebe, I just said I needed to call my building manager – that is not sexy.” She pulled away from your skin.
“Uh, everything you do is sexy,” she countered. “Say something else? Something that’s actually hot,” she begged, ignoring your teasing smile, and raised eyebrow.
“Hm, vale, vale,” you wracked your brains, trying to think of something that you actually considered sexual. “Quiero que me tengas en todas las formas que quieras. Quiero destrozarte una y otra y otra vez.” You usually weren’t that explicit about your wants, but you were reliant on Lena not really knowing what you were saying. Lena was gobsmacked. She had not a clue what you had just said but the way you had said it – the slight rasp in your voice, the rosy hue to your skin, the sticky sheen of sweat, the hickeys she had sucked into your skin. She rolled you over, balancing above you as her legs slotted between yours.
“Redonda Dos?” You asked. She knew enough Spanish for that.
Just as things were getting interesting again, your door swung up.
“Y/N? ¿Estás aquí? Ale te ha estado enviando mensajes de texto toda la tar -” Ona cut herself off with a shrill scream.
“Me arden los ojos.” She gagged dramatically. “Ew, mis ojos.”
“Oni, qué carajo en realidad?” You shouted back, dragging the duvet up to cover the both of you.
“Do you want to introduce me?” She grinned evilly.
“No, get out!” You glowered at her. When she made no effort to move, you threw a pillow at her.
“Ale says to come to her room.” You flicked your finger at her, letting her know your displeasure. Turning uour attention was fixed back on Lena, you heard her cackling outside.
“Scheiße, Scheiße, Scheiße. Alexia wird mich töten. Ich bin tot. Ich werde sterben. Ich hatte praktisch Sex mit ihrer kleinen Schwester. Oh, mein Gott. Ich werde sterben. Fuck.” Lena was panicking – real, genuine anxiety spread throughout her chest as she sat up against the pillows.
“Liebe, it’s ok,” you soothed, grabbing one hand in yours and swinging your other arm across her shoulders. “Liebe?” you tried again.
“Alexia is going to kill me.” Lena said, looking into your eyes for what she genuinely thought might be the final time.
“No, she won’t.” You smiled softly, not wanting to laugh at Lena’s ridiculousness. “I won’t let her,” you vowed, squeezing her hand tight in promise. “Now, we should probably get some clothes on and head to Ale’s room.”
As you reached for your hoodie, your world darkened suddenly as fabric landed on your head. You lifted it up to reveal a very familiar Adidas hoodie, turning back to see a sheepish Lena.
“How did that get there?” She asked innocently.
“I don’t know, Liebe. How did it get there?” You played along. “There’s only one Adidas athlete in this room, and it’s not me.” She shrugged, snatching your Barca hoodie out of your reach.
“I don’t know, Schatz. But it looks like it’s your only hoodie, and I want you to stay warm.” She was a terrible actor.
“If you wanted me to wear your clothes, you could have just asked,” you laughed as you slipped on the material, getting slightly lost as you tried to find the head hole. You heard a sigh and footsteps before the fabric was rearranged on you as your head burst through the top.
“Guten Tag,” you beamed at her.
“Hallo, Schatz,” she smiled at you before stealing a kiss. You hummed gently, allowing yourself to melt into her just slightly.
“Vamos, vamos.” You spun her around to face the door. “Let’s not keep Ale waiting,” you laughed and tapped her on the bum to get her moving.
Alexia’s room was exactly the same as yours – a wide, comforting bed with a mountain of pillows dominating the space. You tapped on the door, knowing that she would probably have at least 3 of the other girls in her room with her.
“Schatz, I know I said I would endure this for you … for us,” Lena said when it was clear Alexia was making you wait a little. Was she second guessing this? Was she regretting you? “And I will, I will.” She added when your head snapped back to look at her. “But I’m really freaking out here.” You softened.
“Oh, Liebe. It’s ok,” you said, pulling her into a hug. “I understand, really, I do. This isn’t exactly how I wanted you to meet Ale, but I promise you,” you squeezed her to emphasise your point. “She’s a giant softy with a tendency for affectionate bullying. If she starts speaking in Catalan, just ignore her; that’s what I do,” you joked, trying to lighten her mood a little. “She’s just like Alex and Svenja are to you. She’s just looking out for me – even though I don’t need her to and certainly not in this case,” you were rambling now, unknowingly easing Lena’s anxieties in an instant.
Someone cleared their throat behind you, cutting your talking off. Lucy. You smiled at her, pushing past as you guided Lena to sit on the edge of the bed, taking her hand in both of yours when you sat next to her – providing quiet but noticeable support. There were more people in the room than you were expecting. You knew Alexia would call on Lucy, Irene and probably Paños and Marta to give the talk, but Ingrid’s presence surprised you, as did Ona’s and Patri’s.
“Entonces, quieres presentarnos a Lena?” Alexia asked, leaning against the desk in front of you, Paños on her left, Lucy on her right. Irene and Marta stood blocking the path to the door – all of them with what they thought were tough expressions on their faces. Ingrid looked annoyed to be there, Ona was trying to look hard, and Patri had an amused smile dancing on her lips.
“In English, Alexia. It’s not fair on Lena to speak in a language she doesn’t know.” You said calmly, breathing deeply to keep your emotions in check. They had promised not to treat you like a child.
“Do you want to introduce us to Lena?” She asked again, voice artificially calm.
“Not if you’re going to treat us like children.” You raised an eyebrow, reminding all of them of their promises to treat you more adult-like.
“That was before we found out you were having sex,” Lucy started. She stood up from where she was leaning, you matching her behaviour by squaring your shoulders.
“Suficiente, vosotros dos.” Alexia ordered before you had the chance to comment. As much as she wanted to give a protective big sister talk, she realised that maybe this was what you meant when you said that you wanted to be treated more like an adult. It was silent as she studied you and Lena – sitting so close you were practically on top of each other, your thumb never wavering in its soothing motion against the back of Lena’s hand, the way Lena’s eyes kept flitting back to your face in search of any discomfort. She didn’t need to do the grandiose speech she was planning to give – she didn’t need to let every one of the older girls chime in with their threats. If Lena harmed you, Lena wouldn’t harm you – of that, Alexia was sure. “Everyone out. Not you or Lena,” she said as you shifted to leave. “Ona, quédate también por favor.” Alexia ignored the other’s protests; Lucy’s whining was heard even with the door closed. She had allowed Ona to stay in her role as your best friend – she wasn’t about to deny her this opportunity (especially since she knew you had promised Lucy you would exact a painful revenge if Ona ever came to you crying over something about their relationship).
“Lena. I am going to say this one time,” Alexia began, watching as Lena’s eyes grew wide and gulped noticeably. You just rolled your eyes at her antics. “If you hurt her,” she paused for dramatic effect. “I will hunt you down … and end you.” Alexia was quite pleased with herself – she considered that to be restrained enough to appease you whilst instilling enough fear in Lena to make her slightly nervous. Lena nodded, taking a breath to start making promises of never ever hurting you.
Ona cleared her throat from her perch on the windowsill, drawing all of your attention to her. She took a deep breath before letting out the sentence she had been practising since you first mentioned a German footballer had caught your eye, “Ich werde dir die Beine brechen.” The pronunciation was horrendous, but Lena knew what she meant. It was the worst threat Ona could think of with Lena being a footballer.
“Oni,” you whined, although you had no leg to stand on – your threat to Lucy had been so much worse.
“There, we have said what was needed to be said. Let’s go to dinner, sí?” Alexia smiled at the three of you, the polar opposite of the menacing Captain that stood in her place moments before. Ona laughed, looping her arm through Alexia’s and heading to the door.
“That wasn’t so bad,” You joked, nudging Lena. The tension was still very much in her body, however.
“I need them to know, and you need to know it too. I won’t hurt you, ever, Schatz. I promise, ich verspreche, prometo.” She looked deep into your eyes, willing you to understand how deep her vow went. She made the promise to herself in the shower after your first date; her mind kept replaying your almost-kiss, your bubbly laugh and the feel of your soft hand in hers. She had vowed that day to never let your smile fade, and she wanted … no, needed … you to know that.
“Liebe, I know that. They know that.” You reached up to cradle her face in your hands. You took a deep breath and said the words that had been playing on your mind for weeks now: “I love you.”
I hope you liked it <3<3<3
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"I'm fine."
Ona Batlle x Reader
You're overworking yourself more than you should be and Ona's worried about you. But you're fine !
Masterlist
You yawned as you checked what time it was, sipping from your coffee as you did so. The clock blinked back at you, reading 5:00 am. Papers were strewn across the kitchen table as you regained your focus on your laptop in front of you, trying to finish all the work you could before your girlfriend was up and you both had to get ready to go to work. It was your fourth day in a row of this routine, up for hours getting caught up on your school work before going to work with Ona.
You had recently been given a job working with the physios for Barcelona while you wrapped up your schooling. It was an incredible opportunity, something you couldn’t say no to, however it had piled on a significant amount of work. At the moment, your job was doing administrative duties for the physios, data tracking and record keeping to make sure it all ran smoothly. It was important for you to prove yourself so that once you finished school you could get offered a real physio job working with the players. But for now, you had your little office that you spent plenty of long hours in and that was all you needed, you just had to stay focused on your school work at the same time.
“Are you seriously up this early again?” You looked over your shoulder just to see Ona trudging towards you, still half asleep. Her hair was a tangled mess, voice rough with sleep as she made her way behind you, draping her arms over your shoulders lazily and pressing her face into your neck.
“Oni I have to get all this work done you know that,” You kissed her cheek lightly, “I didn’t wake you up, did I?” Your free hand came up to rest on top of hers as she still stayed, hugging you from behind while you went back to your work.
She shook her head in the crook of your neck, “how long have you been up? You need sleep, mi cielo.”
You let out a soft sigh, pausing your work momentarily, “I’m fine, I promise. I just need to stay caught up with everything. If you want, there’s some coffee on the counter but it might be cold now.”
The brunette pressed a kiss to your cheek before standing to get the coffee you made. “Don’t think I didn’t notice how you avoided my question. And the way this coffee is ice cold has me thinking I really won’t like the answer.” She gave you a pointed look, a small smirk adorning her face, while you just rolled your eyes. “Will you at least tell me how many cups of coffee you’ve had so far?”
“This is number three.” She wasn’t sure she heard you correctly due to how softly you spoke.
“Did you just say three?” you nodded. “It’s barely even 5:00 and you’ve had three cups of coffee. You’re obviously tired. Let’s go lie down, you’ve still got plenty of time before we have to leave. I’ll hold you, come on.” Your girlfriend stood up, immediately offering her hand, looking at you expectantly for you to join her in an extra hour of sleep. You cringed slightly, not getting up from your spot at the table but knowing she wasn’t going to like your answer.
“Ona you know I can’t do that. I can’t get behind on this school work. If you want to go back to sleep though, I’ll bring my computer and come sit with you?”
“That’s alright,” she shook her head and settled back into the chair next to you, slightly defeated that she couldn’t convince you, “I’ll stay out here with you, keep you company.”
“Thanks, love. Your company does make it slightly less miserable.”
“Well I’m certainly glad I don’t make it more miserable.” You giggled softly, sharing a soft kiss before she rested her head on your shoulder, watching you do your school work while she settled into your side.
You knew you were exhausted and that Ona was right, but at the moment it was just the price you had to pay. There was only about a month left until you finished school, then your workload would be cut in half. The problem at the moment was the combination of school plus your new job that was killing you. You had to keep up with both, horribly desperate to prove yourself in every possible way. So if it meant being a little short on sleep, you could handle it. By getting up early and staying up late, doing as much as possible when Ona was asleep, it left you more time to spend with Ona during the day. The more you did it, the more your girlfriend seemed to realize just how tired you were becoming, but you just had to push through it for another month and then it would be over.
About an hour later, you were surprised to see that your girlfriend was still awake against your shoulder. You assumed it was boring or uncomfortable for her to be sitting there that long with nothing to do besides watch you do homework and drink cold coffee, but Ona didn’t seem to mind.
She remained snuggled into your side until her alarm went off, signaling that you both needed to get ready to go. As soon as you abandoned your work, you were back to your usual self, making conversation with each other and dancing around to some of your favorite music as you got ready for the day together.
You had a little routine together where you often did each other's hair in the morning. It didn’t matter what it was, it was just a small way of getting to connect with each other and start your day off on a high note. So there you sat, in front of your mirror while Ona threaded her fingers through your hair as you shut your eyes and leaned back into her hands. “You always end up looking like you’re gonna fall asleep when I play with your hair.” she giggled at you.
“Yeah, it's relaxing,” you shrugged, “And you say I always look like I’m gonna fall asleep so it’s really nothing out of the ordinary anyways.”
“Hmm, that’s true, cause you never sleep, mi cielo.” Her hands carefully pulled your hair back into a low bun for you, making sure it was up to your standards before you switched spots to do her braid. Even though it was small, you were extremely grateful for this part of your routine. Feeling her hands move along your scalp always brought you comfort during your least favorite time of day.
.
When you arrived at the training grounds, Ona walked you to your office just as she always did, carrying your bag for you and giving you plenty of kisses before she headed off to the locker room. The second she left your office, you immediately buried yourself in your work. The coffee machine in your office was working overtime trying to keep up with you while you only looked away from your work long enough to brew a new cup. It seemed as though your days of sleepless nights were starting to catch up with you as you continued to work harder to remain focused.
Most days at work, you’d eat lunch with Ona. Either she’d bring her lunch to your office or, more commonly, you’d take your lunch to go eat with her and her teammates. You knew most of them, especially the ones she was closer with, so you liked having the break outside the confines of your office.
But today you couldn’t do that.
If you just spent your lunch working on your school work, you would have time to spend with Ona after you both finished working, which seemed like a much better use of your time. That way it’d be just the two of you, not stuck at work, able to spend some quality time together.
So you did the one thing you almost never did, and shut your office door, signaling to everyone to leave you uninterrupted. Of course when it was fifteen minutes into your lunch breaks and you still hadn’t filled the seat Ona had saved for you at the table with her friends, she picked up her plate and made her way to your office, thinking that’s what you were intending on. You heard her footsteps stop outside your door, and watched as she seemed to just pause there, figuring out what to do. On one hand, she knew that your closed door meant you were busy, but on the other hand, she also knew it was your lunch break.
When she finally made up her mind, she opened your door, ever so slowly, peeking her head through the small crack and finally seeing what had kept you from her- more school work. Upon seeing what you were doing, the brunette further opened your door and entered, settling into the extra chair across from your desk to eat her lunch. “Are you really working through lunch? No offense but you look like you haven’t slept in days, babe. You look like you could pass out at any second, you really need to take a break.”
“Ona, I’m fine. If I finish this now, then I’ll have time to spend with you tonight once we’re done here. Then I’ll take a break. With you.” You gave her a cheesy smile, hoping she’d accept your answer but still knowing she probably wouldn’t.
“As much as I’d like some time with you, it’s not me I’m worried about. You need a break. For you. Look me in the eyes and tell me what time you went to bed last night. Or if you went to bed for that matter.”
Of course she saw right through you and you should’ve expected that. Ona knew you better than you knew yourself sometimes. “I’m okay, I promise. I’m a little tired, sure, but I’ll be fine. I just have to get to graduation and then I’ll have a normal schedule again.”
Your girlfriend was starting to get frustrated by your insistence and refusal to listen. She knew you were running yourself to death and needed nothing more than a break to keep functioning. “(Y/n) you’re not listening. That’s the fifth time in the last two minutes that you’ve yawned, don’t think I don’t notice. When was the last time your head hit a pillow?”
“Ona. I’m fi-”
“If you say you’re fine one more time I might lose my mind.” She took a deep breath, trying to remain calm and not push her frustrations onto you further. The defender quickly stood up, pulling you up from your chair abruptly, “That’s it! We’re getting you out of this stupid office!
You knew there was no point in arguing with her, allowing her to drag you down the hallway into a lounge area when some of her teammates were scattered around the room keeping themselves busy. Some were finishing lunch, some of the younger girls doing school work of their own, others just relaxing together and hanging out. Ona pulled you onto a couch that had some sort of football game playing in front of it, many of the girls half-watching it. She immediately pulled you into her side, forcing you to cuddle up to her- something she wouldn’t normally do when you were both at work, but decided it was necessary at that moment.
“Lay down. I’ll set an alarm to wake you up when your lunch is over, just please, rest.” You gave her a half-hearted glare, partially for pulling you away from your schoolwork but partially because you doubted you’d be able to sleep in a space like this. But once again, Ona saw right through you. “Close your eyes and stop fighting it. I’ll be right here with you, even if you can’t actually sleep, you need a break. And you’re already half asleep so I’m really not too worried about it. I’ve got you, mi cielo.”
You gave her a slight nod before making yourself comfortable with your head on her lap, trying to do as she asked. You knew you were tired but didn’t fully comprehend how bad it was until your body instantly succumbed to your exhaustion. Within minutes, you had passed out on the couch. Ona’s teammates knew not to bother you having heard all of the defender’s concerns about you and your lack of sleep lately. All she got from them were a few knowing glances, happy to see how relieved Ona was at the sight of you sleeping on her.
Your girlfriend fully intended on waking you up at the same time you normally ended your lunch and went back to work, but you were so peaceful on her lap, and she knew how badly you needed the sleep that she had a hard time doing so. She knew she hated lying to you and that you’d likely be pissed off at her, but Ona really, truly felt that she didn’t have a choice- she had to let you sleep. You were running yourself into the ground and this seemed to be the only hope at slowing you down and allowing your body to recuperate.
When it was time for her to go back to her own training, Alexia came over to grab her, stopping in front of the younger woman when she saw the current position she was in, flashing her a sympathetic look. “Oni, you stay with your girl, I’ll cover for you. It’s just a regular gym session so you can make it up another time. Let her sleep.”
She was shocked to hear her captain so willing to allow her to miss a gym session, just to let you keep sleeping, but Alexia knew how worried she had been about you, everyone did. It was all Ona had talked about for the last week- how you were exhausted and overworked and rarely sleeping more than a few hours. And Ona had been playing full 90’s lately so Alexia knew she could also afford the break to let her body recover alongside yours. “Thank you, Ale. Seriously, I owe you.”
“Don’t mention it. You could use the sleep too, so why don’t you both just use the afternoon to catch up. I’ll let the physios know about (y/n). They’ve been pushing more than anyone that she needs a break so they’ll be glad to know she finally has one.”
Ona gave her captain another nod, grateful for the understanding, before getting comfy alongside you so she could also get some shut-eye. Alexia turned down the volume of the TV and lowered the lights before bringing a throw blanket to throw on top of you both, quietly chuckling at Ona as she did so, “Let me just be a mom for a second, tuck you in and tell you sweet dreams.” The blonde placed a quick kiss on both of your foreheads before leaving the two of you alone, knowing just how badly both of you needed it.
It was hours later when you woke up on Ona’s lap, still on a couch at the Barca training facility. As your eyes slowly creeped open, you noticed how quiet the room was, as if there wasn’t a team member within a mile radius of you. You looked around some, a bit confused as to how you ended up in the position you did when you finally thought to check your watch- 5:47 PM.
You jolted up, startling Ona awake as you did so, confused as to how you could’ve slept through your entire afternoon. “Ona, what the hell?! You were supposed to wake me up! How did I just sleep through the entire afternoon, I was supposed to be working!”
“Hey, hey, it’s okay I promise. Ale agreed we should let you sleep, the other physios were totally okay with it, she double checked and everything. It’s okay.” She watched the tension physically leave your body as you let out a sigh, partially relieved to hear that nobody would be mad at you for ignoring your work all afternoon, partially annoyed that your girlfriend forced you into taking a nap. It was hard to be mad at her though when you saw the way she looked at you, her eyes big and filled with concern.“You fell asleep right on my lap. It was cute. You’re adorable when you’re sleeping, you know that?”
You collapsed back into her arms for a hug, appreciative at her insistence to take care of you, even if you didn’t want to do it yourself. “Thank you, Oni. I love you, clearly I needed that.”
She held you close, rocking you gently before separating herself. “And I love you, mi cielo.” She pressed a kiss to the tip of your nose, “why don’t we go home? Snuggle for real, not at work, and then get to bed?” You responded with a slight nod before allowing her to help you up, and go gather your things to drive you both home.
.
On the way home Ona made the executive decision to pick up some takeout so you could really just focus on relaxing together once you got home. When you arrived, you did just that. Your girlfriend wouldn’t let you lift a finger, fully insisting that she had to take care of you so you could wind down and take a break. She led you directly to your room, sitting you on the bed while she changed you from your work clothes and into an old sweatshirt of hers with some comfy shorts. The defender made sure you were fully settled on the couch in a pile of pillows and blankets with your food before she took a shower and got changed to join you.
In the time that she was away, you had dozed off again in the cocoon she had made you in the living room, only waking up when you heard her footsteps. “Sorry, were you sleeping? I didn’t mean to wake you, go back to sleep.” She sat down next to you, stroking your hair soothingly, knowing just how much it put you to sleep when she played with your hair.
“Why don’t we just go to bed instead? You can read or something but it might be easier if I’m just in bed already before I fall asleep again.” Your girlfriend gave you a nod before leading you into your bed, snuggling up next to you.
Once you had settled in bed, you were basically laying on top of her, her hands holding you tightly against her with your head on her chest, listening to her heartbeats. “Goodnight kiss before you fall asleep?” The brunette left a light tap on your back, getting your attention before you leaned up to fulfill her request, happy to oblige.
“Do you wanna hear about the dream I had last night?” Ona asked you quietly, knowing her voice would lull you to sleep if you let her keep talking. You did this anytime either of you struggled to fall asleep- talking softly, mostly nonsense about anything and everything while the other half-listened until eventually falling asleep. You gave her a somewhat excited nod, knowing that her voice was always exactly what you needed.
So there you were, while Ona went on and on about her latest dream and you drifted back into sleep, not processing any of your words. “So then I was going to-” she looked down, noticing how your breaths had slowed, “oh okay you’re already asleep, I’m just talking to myself now, cool.” The brunette breathed out a slight chuckle at the sight of you. “Buenas noches, mi cielo. Sweet dreams.” She pressed a long kiss to your hairline, thankful to finally see you at peace, for the first time in at least a week- completely at rest in your lover’s arms.
hope you enjoyed! always appreciate any feedback and requests :)
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Secret // Alexia Putellas
| Part 2 | Part 3 |
Everybody knew that Alexia was a private person - she only shared the information she wanted to share as she was very selective in her choice of words and very careful about whom she told what.
And even though that facade dropped around her friends and family, she still kept you a secret - she preferred it that way - having you to herself and not having to deal with headlines like 'Alexia Putellas dating her Barcelona teammate.' and the drama that it could cause.
Whenever it was just the two of you she was the sweetest girl, treating you like a princess and being totally in love with you while when other people were around, she kept her distance, acted strictly professional and didn‘t show any signs of affection.
The only person who knew about you was her sister, Alba and she only found out by accident.
-
"mi amor, you‘re so beautiful" the midfielder admired, kissing along your jaw, "I can‘t get enough of you" she found her way down to your neck, completely lost in the feeling of you before a certain spot on your neck caught her attention where she gently created reddish marks.
Just because nobody knew about you, didn’t mean that it would stop Alexia from silently claiming you.
Her fingertips ran along your exposed skin as your shirt had riddled up, leaving the midfielder craving for more.
The Barcelona player continued to mumble sweet nothings, planting some last even sweeter kisses on your neck before she reached up to your lips, kissing them with every ounce of love. Alexia always kissed you like that, letting you know that you caused the butterflies in her stomach.
Tugging on your shirt, she signaled that she wanted it off. Happily obeying, you took it off, her hands now wandering around your bare upper body as she was back kissing you with so much passion and love.
"Ale- do you know what-" both of you froze at the same time, your girlfriend shielding your exposed body as her sister stood in the door frame, "oh my gosh, I’m so sorry!" she covered eyes, rushing out of the room and slamming the door shut.
"mierda!" Ale was off of you in an instant, throwing your shirt back to you.
"I‘m Alba!" the younger Putellas called threw the door, "we haven‘t meet yet. I‘m her sister!"
You chuckled - wrong move as Alexia glared at you, marching out of her bedroom.
"Do you ever knock?!" she said angrily, pulling her sister away, giving you the time you needed.
"I thought you were asleep! You didn‘t open the front door when I knocked" the sister defended herself in their mother tongue.
Alexia huffed, pinching the bridge of her nose, "so, who‘s she?" Alba asked.
Perfectly timed, you exited the bedroom, walking towards the sisters in the living room, "I’m Y/N" you smiled nicely, offering your hand.
"Alba" she introduced herself once again, returning your smile and shaking your hand.
"She‘s my girlfriend" the midfielder huffed, annoyed that her little sister caught you, "20€ if you don‘t tell anyone about it" the older one said.
She would pay money to keep you a secret? Don‘t get me wrong, you didn‘t want to be public as you loved the privacy both of you had as individuals and together but you did hope for that she would at least tell your friends and family. All you wanted was to hold her hand and not to worry about standing too close to her.
The sparkle in your eyes died down, feeling stings in your heart but nonetheless respecting Alexia‘s wishes.
"I don‘t need your money" Alba stated when she saw the way your face fell, "you could have just said please."
You felt more than rejected in that moment.
"You won‘t tell anybody about this" she ordered this time now, her jaw clenched and voice firm - captains order.
Alba walked towards the door, "I‘m going to the car, mamá is waiting. Hurry up" before she left, only Alexia and you left in her apartment.
"I‘m sorry amor, I forgot that we were having lunch together." the midfielder explained, not knowing nor realizing that her behavior had hurt you as she was just apologizing for the incident of Alba walking in.
"You can stay if you‘d like" she smiled, putting on her shoes.
After she had laced her last shoe, she pulled you in by your hips, kissing you good bye, getting a bit carried as the feeling of your lips locked was addicting.
-
You loved being Alexia‘s girlfriend but you didn‘t like being her secret.
To be honest, it didn‘t bother you at first but after 6 months, you started to think about at least telling your family (officially you hadn‘t even met Alba before) and friends but every time you proposed the idea of it, she got defensive and annoyed, so you didn‘t bring it up again.
After one year, you slowly started to think that maybe she was ashamed of being seen with you, just being with you or of you as her behavior got more and more secretive day by day - she didn‘t even act like your friend in training.
You didn‘t know where it was coming from because whenever you were behind closed doors, she was the most affectionate person who loved to cook for you or just sharing the same air made her heart and brain go love sick. She was indeed very much in love with you yet afraid to show this love outside of either of your apartments.
Sometimes you wished that she would take you out for dinner - it didn‘t have to be fancy at all, McDonalds would be simply enough - you just wanted to experience a date night.
And even though, she made home as romantic as possible, it wasn’t enough anymore. You craved for more.
Sometimes when you saw Ingrid and Mapi openly in love, you felt jealous. You wanted that too.
They were your friends and you were so happy for them as they matched each other perfectly but you couldn’t help but feel envy. You envied what they have, imagining how it would feel like with Alexia - hoping to have that with Alexia, one day.
-
"Do you want to go out tonight? Frido told me about this new restaurant!" you said smiling.
The midfielder looked up from her notebook, pausing the tv as she replayed Chelsea’s matches (the club Barcelona would face in the uwcl semi finals)
"Is it takeout?" she asked.
You shook your head - no. "We can go out" you tried again, flopping next to her on the couch.
"Amor!" she grumbled as all her notes fell to the ground, now not sorted anymore.
"Sorry"
"I‘m preparing for our upcoming matches, you should join me in fact, so you know how Chelsea will play. We can order takeout - you know I don‘t like going out with you" she sorted through her notes, grumbling and huffing at the non existing order. She hadn‘t realized that her words were harsh and in fact rude.
You got the message - she didn’t like going out(side) with you, she had made that very clear.
"I can get you some food from there tomorrow" she added, her voice gentle and the wrinkle between her brows gone as her notes were back in the correct order.
It didn‘t help though, you felt hurt. Was it that bad to be seen with you? You‘re a Barcelona player, her teammate - and friends get food together all the time, so why can‘t you get food together as friends? Nobody would suspect that the two of you were more than friends, right?
"Are you hungry? Do you want me to cook something for you, mi amor?"
Again, you shook your head, scrolling through your phone while you acted tough and unbothered by her comment as she didn‘t even notice how harsh her words had sounded before.
You sent a message in the group chat with Ingrid and Frido, asking if they wanted to try out the restaurant which the Swedish woman had discovered. Both of them agreed within seconds.
-
The two of you laid in bed, Alexia‘s arms wrapped around you as she whispered sweet nothings in your ear. It became a routine for Alexia to lull you to sleep while tracing patterns along your skin. She loved doing so and she loved watching you sleep - you looked at peace.
Something about tonight was different though. Normally, it wouldn’t take long for the captain to soothe you to sleep but after 30 minutes, you still were awake, mind seemingly not finding any rest.
"¿Qué pasa?" she whispered in the dark, gently pressing a kiss to the exposed skin on your shoulder.
"It‘s been over a year, Ale, when will you introduce me as your girlfriend? Or take me out on a date that isn’t in here?" your voice was almost inaudible. You knew it was a sensitive topic for Alexia, the girl always denying your requests on telling someone and shutting you out after the conversation and also avoiding you for the rest of the day. "Amor.. we‘ve talked about this" she said, pulling her hands off your body.
Coldness hit your body while the parts were her hands had rested burnt down.
You turned around, looking at her, the moonlight the only light source "all I’m asking is for some recognition." you admitted, almost pleading for her attention outside of either of your homes.
"But I see you. I see you in training and after training, why is it so important to you that people now? We won‘t have any privacy!" her voice raising slightly.
"Alexia… this has nothing to do with the media. I want to meet your family! Or go on a date and wear very nice clothes. Is that too much to ask for?"
"You‘re right. Lo siento, amor" her hands cupped your cheeks, resting her forehead against yours, "I‘ll try to be better"
-
Over the next few months, Alexia’s home started to become your least favourite place - you felt like you were trapped in a cage.
Nothing had changed.
She loved you behind closed doors while she couldn’t even look at you in training.
Each day that passed, more of your heart broke. Your motivation faded - football was your work and no longer a passion.
And Alexia could tell. Your passes were sloppy and your tackles were harsh.
As soon as you had arrived in her apartment, she began complaining about your attitude.
You were not having it.
You started yelling at each other, rude comments leaving both of your mouths,
"You promised me!" you shouted, all hidden anger and hurt discovering the surface, "you promised me and nothing has changed! I‘m your dirty little secret!" you spat.
"Alba knows about you, isn’t that enough?!"
"You offered her fucking money to keep her mouth shut!"
"What do you want?!"
"I can‘t do this anymore, Alexia. I don’t want to think about whether my girlfriend is ashamed of me or not."
"What are you talking about- amor?"
"I‘m worth more than that."
"Please- give me a chance"
"I did, Ale, more than once" you walked towards the front door, bending down to put on your shoes.
The captain followed, so overwhelmed by what was happening that her persona took some turns, "If you walk out that door, we‘re done!"
your hand was resting on the doorknob, ready to leave.
You looked at her, "Behind that door, we never existed anyway."
And with that being said, you left.
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Healing (Alexia Putellas x reader)
A/N: This took me a lot longer to finish than I hoped but it’s done. Grab a drink and get comfy because it’s a long one, in fact I think it’s my longest fic to date.
The world had its questions and you were well aware of the headlines.
Y/N Y/L/N quits football.
Where is Y/N Y/L/N? Here's what we know.
The best in the world has vanished.
If you find Y/N tell her Sarina is looking for her.
The last twelve months had been the hardest in your life. You thought you could prepare for it, that it would easier because you knew it was coming but that wasn't the case. The day it happened was the day your heart broke and as you buried her you knew you were burying part of yourself too.
You left the world speculating as to why you didn't extend your contract with Lyon, why you never signed for another club and more importantly people were wondering where you had disappeared to.
Both your club and country team mates knew about your personal life and the tragedy that happened shortly after the euros.
You missed football, of course you did, but you also needed to take time away to process what had happened. A return date was never set but then the world cup happened. You watched your team mates cry after losing to Spain and you couldn't help but feel partially responsible. The game might have ended differently if you had played.
A decision had been made. It was time to return to the pitch. You had offers before and after the euros. The only question is what teams would still want you?
The sun was setting in Barcelona as the team finished up a late training session. Most of the players stayed behind to take advantage of the free food given they knew once they got home they wouldn't have the energy to cook themselves.
“Lucy your phone is ringing” Ona shouts over to where the English defender is filling her plate.
“Who is it?” Lucy replies.
Ona’s face floods with guilt. Almost as if she shouldn’t be looking at the phone. This sparks interest of those around her but no one more than Keira who sees the name on the screen.
“Y/N” Lucy all but ran back to table after hearing Keira say your name “is everything ok? Where are you? Yes I’m with Lucy. Before I hand you over promise me that you’re ok? Good”
Keira hands over the phone and watches Lucy’s face as she tries to figure out why you called and what you are talking about.
“Yes there are people around me. Ok, I’ll ask”
When you hang up the phone Lucy does as you ask or at least she makes the first step.
“Alexia” Lucy walks around to where the captain is sat with Mapi and Ingrid “Who would I talk about signing a new player?”
“It’s not our job to recruit players but if you know something that might help the club then tell me and I will ask” Alexia wasn’t stupid. She heard your name and now Lucy was asking this. It wasn’t a coincidence.
“I can’t. This is a sensitive subject”
“Vale. Talk to Jona and if he thinks the player is right for the club then he can set up a meeting”
Alexia left the training facility that night thinking of you. You were at the peak of your career, many people considered you the best in the world and if she is being honest she thought you would win the Balon d’Or, not her. That night Alexia watched your highlights for hours, even the ones in the games against her. You really were a once in a generation player which makes it that much harder for Alexia to understand why you walked off the pitch at Wembley and hadn’t been seen on one since.
The next day at training the energy felt different. Lucy and Keira had a sense of happiness that their team mates hadn’t seen before. They would gather around Lucy’s phone but then hide it when somebody came close to them.
Jona came walking into the gym with Xavi Puig right behind him and called over both Keira and Lucy. A couple of players watch the conversation unfold and tried their hardest to read their lips.
“Ingrid, what are they saying?” Mapi nudges her girlfriend.
“They’re talking about Y/N Y/L/N” Alexia was stretching on the floor playing no part in the eavesdropping.
“How do you know?” Ingrid asks her.
“She called Lucy yesterday and then Lucy talked to me about the club signing a new player. I can’t know for sure but that’s what I think is going on”
A couple of days later you landed in Barcelona, greeted by the warm weather and your two England team mates who kept a low key appearance in the arrivals hall. You stop when you are a meter away them. You didn’t know what to do, you hadn’t seen them in almost a year.
“Come here” Lucy throws her arms around you followed by Keira.
“We’re so happy to see you Y/N. We really have missed you”
You remain quiet as you walk to the car. Both of them fill you in on what the team is like and you make sure to remind them that you haven’t officially signed yet.
“Jona mentioned that. You want a trial training session?”
“It’s the right thing to do” you didn’t want any special treatment. You wanted to earn the right to play for the club and not just be handed the contract.
“You could have not played football for 5 years and still run rings round all of us” Lucy knows you the most having played with her at both club and country. You were too humble in her eyes so she took it upon herself to remind you of your greatness from time to time.
“I never said I haven’t played football. That has been the thing to get me through the past 10 months” you didn’t mean to be a downer, in fact you didn’t know what you were saying until it was too late.
“How are you doing?” Keira asks from the front seat and you see Lucy eyeing you up in rear view mirror.
“Some days are harder than others and no day has been easy. She would be happy that I’m here though. She always said that if I didn’t go back to England then she’d want us to come here”
You couldn’t bring yourself to say her name.
“She always did hate the french winters” Lucy laughs at the memories she shared with your wife.
Your mind goes back to just a couple of years ago. Lyon were playing at home and the weather was awful. You saw Natalia in the crowd shivering but still she cheered you on, she always was your biggest fan. Come rain or shine, your girl was in the audience. You hated the thought of playing without her being in the crowd but you also knew she wouldn’t want to give up your career.
“Y/N” Keira gently nudged your knee. It was obvious that you were taking a trip down memory lane and she didn’t want to scare you.
“Huh” you quickly wiped away a tear “Oh we’re here” you grabbed your backpack and jumped out of the car leaving them in the front not knowing what to do.
“Let’s leave her be. She knows we are here and will come to us when she’s ready”
You were in awe as you walked the halls of Joan Camper. The things the team has achieved were that of greatness. It was a club that created legacys and you found yourself feeling something that you hadn’t in a long time; excitement.
Lucy and Keira lead you to the locker room just as they were instructed to. The rest of the team were already out of the field which was part of the plan. There hanging in a corner locker was a training kit for you. You didn’t expect it and you definitely didn’t expect to have been given your number.
“You did this?” You ask the pair.
“Salma did. The team knows you called Lucy and when Salma heard to locker room rumours of you joining she insisted. Between us she is a big fan of yours, bigger than Luce”
“Not possible” the defender joked.
The boots were fastened and you were ready, well almost ready. There was one thing you wasn’t prepared for. You looked down at your necklace. It was a simple gold chain that held two rings: yours and Talia’s.
“I can’t do it” you slumped down in defeat and bury your face in your hands.
“Hey” Lucy crouches down in front of you “they let us wear jewellery for training, you can keep them on”
You walked out onto the field and all eyes fell on you. You felt like a spectacle and you hated the attention. They didn’t know the current version of you, they had only met the old Y/N so you channel her and introduce yourself to them during the next drinks break.
“I know some of us have met as opponents but this is different. I’m Y/N, it’s a pleasure to meet you all, I hope I can keep up” you make a joke hoping to avoid the elephant in the room.
“We’ll see about that. I’m Alexia” She is the first person to you.
“Lovely to meet you Alexia”
It’s hard to explain the feeling when you’re playing football. It’s as if you mind switches off whilst also been completely focused. It take a few attempts to get into the rhythm that is Barcelona football but you catch on quickly. It comes as no shock to the rest of the team that you play in complete sync with Lucy and Keira. The two of them even stay back at the end to work with you on some movements that you weren’t pleased with.
Some players go shower but a few stay behind, albeit out of sight, and watch you.
“She has a gift” Alexia says to nobody in particular.
“Nobody has seen her in over a year and this is how she is playing. Look, she is running rings around them. How is that possible?” Patri adds.
“Does anybody know where she was?” Pina asks the small group.
“No but I could ask Ingrid or Caro to ask Ada. They are best friends and surely you would tell your best friend where you are going” Mapi forms a plan in her head, one that she will soon find out to be a bad idea.
“Do it” Alexia tells the defender “We are a family here and if she joins us then we have a right to know where she has been”
When Barcelona posted a photo of you signing a contract on their socials the world went crazy. The media were relentless and the fans were quick to show their support for you even though some were skeptical about your sudden reappearance and new team.
You ignored them for the most part as they had no idea what had happened. You fit into the team almost right away and was enjoying every game with Barcelona. You scored on your debut and had been involved in a goal every game since. Months had passed and much to your surprise you had only been asked about the missing year once or twice.
Caro refused to ask Ada about you and Ingrid only did when her girlfriend became obsessed with finding out the truth. Ada’s answer was simple ‘I won’t tell you and if she doesn’t want you to know then you should respect her wishes’.
You remained a mystery though and for the most part the team seemed to forget about your missing year.
When the second international window came that is when things changed and you felt like you made a friend. Mapi still wasn’t representing her country so she reached out and asked if you wanted to meet up for a coffee.
Anybody could easily be intimidated by the blonde but you liked her. She had this energy that made you know accepting her invite was a no brainer. That and you had questions of your own.
“How did you know?”
Mapi places down a a small coffee in a glass; a cortado.
“I asked Keira what you ordered”
A comfortable silence took over as the two of you sipped on your coffees. You found it funny the way Mapi looked at you then her coffee and back to you again. You recognised the signs; you were making her nervous. Why though you had no idea.
You decide to make the first move and you get straight to the point much to the defender’s surprise.
“I spoke with Ada”
This got her attention. You had your suspicions but the look on her face confirmed it. Still, she played along.
“That’s nice. You’re very close, no?” Mapi tried her best to look innocent but you weren’t having any of it and the look on your face told her that.
“She had an interesting conversation with Ingrid. Do you happen to know anything about this?”
She did. You know she did.
“No” you got a sheepish look from Mapi and you wondered if she knew how unconvincing she was being.
“I think you did. I think you got Ingrid to ask Ada about me”
“Lo siento”
“Here’s the thing I don’t understand. I know you all want to know, you’ve been whispering about me for months yet not one of you has come to me and asked me directly. You have been going behind my back trying to dig up information about a time that I clearly don’t want to talk about”
Mapi dips her head. She truly thought that her and the team were been careful but obviously not.
“Maria, I want you to put yourself in my shoes. Would you want to talk about it with strangers when you barely talk to your best friends about it?”
The defender thinks about it for a moment. You had barely left Lucy and Keira’s side but she hadn’t really heard you talking, you were always listening to what they were saying and replying when necessary.
“It was bad wasn’t it?” She asks.
“The worse year of my life” you confess and you can your throat close at the thought of the months in question.
“We are in jail?”
You cannot help but chuckle at her words.
“No, I was not in jail”
“Did you kill somebody?”
“No, I did not kill anybody”
“So no crimes were committed?”
“Is that what you have all come up with? That I broke the law?”
“Most of us, yes. Aitana think’s you were in the hospital because you were sick”
Her response came at the worst time possible. You spit your coffee out when you hear the midfielder’s suspicion.
Technically she was right. You were in the hospital but you weren’t in the hospital.
“I wasn’t sick”
“Clearly. Look at you, you’re huge. I mean you are big. No, you are strong”
“Calm down Mapi, I know what you mean. Thank you”
The two of you stay in the cafe for another hour. You take this time just the two of you getting to know one another. You ask Mapi about her tattoos and she learn’s you have a few of your own which are hidden on your back. When she asks for their meaning you promise you will tell her the stories another time.
You both walk to the metro station and by coincidence you end up of the same train. You get off before her and just before the door opens, Mapi grabs your hand.
“I’ll get them to stop. You don’t owe us an explanation, Y/N”
“Thank you Maria”
You’re not sure what the tattooed defender said but the whispers stopped or so you thought. They stopped whispering in front of you but little did you know the speculations were still going on behind your back. It is early in December when things come to a head and you snapped.
“What do you mean she is staying Spain?” Alexia asked Salma.
“That she is staying her in Barcelona. She said she might go to Valencia for a few days but that’s it” the forward wasn’t sure what to say or if she should have said anything at all.
“And you don’t think that is strange? This is woman who used to love England. The fans called her Queen of England, por dios. How can she be apart of this team if we know nothing about her. She is lying to us” Alexia ranted on and who knew how much longer she would have continued if not for Lucy interrupting her.
“Alexia, that is enough!” Lucy slams her fist on the locker before turning to her captain “She has come to this team and done nothing but good. She plays well for us and gives it her all on the pitch. Off it she makes the effort and yes sometimes she says no to things but isn’t that her right? You stand there as our captain but look at you, you’re nothing but a bully. I am ashamed to say i’m your team mate right now. That girl has been through hell these past couple of years and since coming here all you keep doing is reminding her of what has happened. You are obsessed with her. Look around, no one else is digging for information. No one is making her uncomfortable on a daily basis”
“She is lying to us. She won’t tell us where she was for over a year. She is hiding something and that isn’t fair on us” Alexia tried to defend her actions.
“Isn’t fair? Are you really that self centred? You have no right to talk about what is and is not fair. I don’t care if you are my captain, I won’t stand by you while you treat my best friend like she has done something wrong. You, Alexia, are a —“
“Lucy” The whole locker room turns upon hearing your voice “I have given up on Alexia, it’s time you do too”
“No! I won’t let her talk about you that way. You don’t deserve this”
“No I don’t but —“
“Y/N” Lucy begs you to let her fight you case.
“Walk away Lucy”
A stare down takes place between you and Lucy. A few seconds later the defender grabs her stuff and leaves the room. To everyone else you are calm and collected but Keira recognises the look in your eye, you are furious.
“I want everyone to listen to me and listen good. My past is none of your business. To those who have let the obsession go, thank you. To those that haven’t” you look Alexia dead in the eye “I want nothing to do with you. I will remain civil on the pitch. Other than that I ask you to stay away from me. That’s if you can respect my wishes. I know it has been hard so far”
You quietly gather your things and try to ignore the multiple sets of eyes on you. With each second you can feel your chest getting tighter and you know it is only a matter second before you will no longer be able to control your breathing. You just needed to get out of there, away from prying eyes.
The hallway is the furthest you get. Your mind was filled of flashbacks, the moments that you tried so hard to bury. The past was not a pretty place, not the last year, but you know that it was only a matter of time before it came crashing down on you.
“Y/N, are you ok?” Mapi and Ingrid are by your side, clearly the couple had left just after you.
“Natalia, she, she”
Ingrid and Mapi shared a look, who was Natalia? They had never heard you mention a Natalia before. Both of them didn’t know what to do. Whilst you had become friends with the pair, they didn’t know you well enough to cope with this moment.
Luckily for them Keira appears out of nowhere. The English woman clearly equipped with what to do.
“Get Lucy, now!” She whisper shouted and Ingrid goes running hoping to catch the defender before she leaves.
“Keira—Natalia”
“I know, I know. We can talk about her later if you want. Right now, I need to focus on me. Can you do that?”
You nod your head as tears flow down your cheeks.
“What happened?” Lucy rushes over to you.
“We found her on the floor. She kept talking about Natalia”
“She told you?” Lucy asks shocked. She knew you wasn’t ready to tell them team but in a state of panic you might be let it slip.
“No. She only said her name” Mapi says. She couldn’t take her eyes off you. This wasn’t a panic attack, no she had seen one of those before. This was something much more intense.
A few minutes pass and Keira manages to keep your breathing under control but you’re still not ready to move. Lucy, Mapi and Ingrid stay close making sure to tell anyone who passes to keep moving.
“What is going on?” Alexia asks with concern, a concern that doesn’t reach Lucy in fact her asking is the worst thing she could have done.
“Get away from her” Lucy is up on her feet and pushing Alexia backwards. She would has fallen to the floor if not for the wall behind her “This is all your fault. You see this, you see her, this is what you have done to her”
“Lucy” you reach up and take her hand. The defender used her strength to pull you up.
You, Lucy, Keira, Mapi and Ingrid walk towards the exit of the stadium.
“Y/N” Alexia’s voice is soft and it is only now that she realises she might have taken things too far.
You turn around to face the Catalonian. For the first time since arriving you make no effort to hide the pain you have felt on a daily basis.
“I want nothing to do with you Alexia”
A week had passed and Alexia started to worry about you more so than she wanted to let on. Lucy and Keira were visibly worried about you and kept an eye on you at all times. She was confused at how things got this bad. Yes, she knew that maybe things had been taken too far but you didn’t show rage, your energy radiated nothing. You were numb. The Barcelona captain had no idea how to make things right with you.
You wore a smile on your face in front of the cameras and fans but behind closed doors it’s liked you switched your emotions off. Alexia asked Mapi about you but it seemed that even her closest friend was on your side. The zaragozian and her girlfriend had become close with you since the incident and Alexia didn’t understand why.
One night she found herself knocking on Mapi’s door hoping to find out how things got so bad.
When the captain was let in there is an evident scowl on Ingrid’s face which Alexia did not expect. The Norwegian excuses herself stating that she needed to go to the supermarket.
“Mentiroso” Alexia says to herself.
“Watch it Alexia. She has her reasons” Mapi jumped to her girlfriend’s defence.
Mapi leads Alexia over to the kitchen table and gets a glass of water for the two of them.
“You’re here about Y/N, aren’t you?” her captain nods “I don’t know what to tell you. What happened in the locker room was bad Ale. We didn’t leave the stadium when you thought we did. Y/N used everything in her to make sure Lucy didn’t do something she would regret. I don’t know what happened during those months but whatever we think it is, it’s so much worse. I shouldn’t be telling you this but she kept mentioning Natalia, I don’t know who that is but I think something happened to her”
Alexia thought she felt guilty about the way things went down with the two of you but that failed in comparison to how she was feeling now. To think that you were grieving someone and her questions were it worse for you, well it made her feel ashamed.
She knew that she hadn’t been the most welcoming. Yes, you and her got a long on the pitch and yes, you were ok at training but she hadn’t made the effort she should have to make you feel at home in Barcelona.
“I don’t know how to fix it Mapi. You know I like her, I think she is amazing—“
“You were her biggest fan” the blonde teased
“But what if I’ve ruined any chance for being friends with her? What if what I’ve done is undoable?” Alexia ignores Mapi comment seen as though she knows she cannot deny it.
Mapi was at a loss for words. She always has had her friend’s back but there was something about you which made her want to protect you and Alexia was someone that you needed protection from.
“You need to give her space Alexia. This week alone I have seen you walk towards her then walk away at least 6 times. Y/N even asked me why you were doing it. You’re making the girl feel uncomfortable”
Alexia mentally scolded herself for her behaviour which in her defence she did not think anyone noticed.
“So space?” Alexia asks.
“Space” Mapi confirmed.
Alexia found it hard at first because she wanted nothing more than to make things right with you but she did as suggested, she gave you space. She saw you start to come out of your shell a bit more as December rolled on. The day game before the Christmas break you were playing in Madrid and that is when Alexia heard you discussing your winter plans with Keira.
“Keira, that’s a sweet offer but I’m sure. I’m going to stay in Barcelona, it is my home now”
The Catalonian took a little comfort in knowing you had grown the love her city despite the hostile behaviour.
“Y/N, it’s Christmas. She would want you to be home for that” your friend asked.
“I don’t know if I can handle going back for Christmas. It would hurt too much”
It felt wrong for Alexia to eavesdrop on your conversation so she leaves out of respect.
“She wouldn’t want you to avoid England. The two of you spent years in France and both of you said coming home to England was your favourite thing to do”
“Keira, stop. It was our favourite thing. There is no more our, no us. It’s just me”
Keira could see your hands shaking. This is the first sign of your panic attack so she drops the subject. She does suggest you going away with them for new years and you said you would as long as it isn’t in the UK or France.
The team had one last recovery session before the winter break and it’s safe to say when it was done everyone was more than happy to go home. You wished everyone a Merry Christmas and without knowing it, Alexia is included.
“Feliz Navidad Alexia, por tu y tu familia”
“Gracias Y/N”
To Alexia this was a gift in itself. Maybe you were opening up to idea of forgiving her. After that you quickly grab your stuff and run off to where Ingrid was waiting for you.
After that interaction, Alexia couldn’t stop thinking about you. She also thought she was hallucinating when she saw your name appear on her phone screen. In the rush of leaving the training facility you picked up the wrong bag, only realising when got home a few hours later and your shirt had an 11 on instead of a 7. You texted Alexia asking if you could meet up to get your stuff back. Alexia, at that point was already at her mother’s house so she sent you that address and told her mum that you were coming over.
You tried to ease your nervous as you drove to your captain’s mother’s house. It was going to be awkward, this much you knew but regardless of the place you and Alexia were in, you wanted to make a good impression on her family.
The knock was gentle as you stop on the door step.
“Y/N, hola. Adelante”
You didn’t know that word meant but you put two and two together and guessing in meant come in so that is what you did. Eli leads you to the living room after telling Alba to go get her sister. Eli headed back into the kitchen and left you in the living room. You didn’t want to take a seat, it wasn’t that kind of visit so you looked around and a wall of photos gains your attention.
Alexia couldn’t have been more than 7 years old. She was adorable. Next to her stood her younger sister and behind her, her parents. You didn’t recognise the man so you assume Alexia’s father works away a lot as you have never seen him at a game.
“That’s Jaume, Alexia and Alba’s father” Your cheeks flush in embarrassment at being caught stooping.
“And your husband” you turn to face the woman “I haven’t seen him around, does he work in a different city?”
“Jaume passed away a little over ten years ago”
She is a widow, like you. That is the first thing you thought. In that moment you had so many questions for her but this is a woman you had only just met. It’s not exactly the small talk she would be expecting. The two of you go quiet and you guess she is thinking about her lost love, just as you are thinking about yours.
Alexia comes downstairs, your bag in hand but stops at the door was upon seeing you in conversation with her mother. Alba nudges her forward but she doesn’t move. The two of them watch you.
“Does it ever get easier?” The question was out of your mouth before you could stop it.
The two sisters share a look. They had no idea what you were talking about and by their mother’s response, she didn’t either.
“Que?” As expected, the question catches Eli off guard.
“Living without the person who promised you forever” you turn to face the older woman with tears falling down your cheek.
“Oh Querida, come here”
You feel comfort in her arms and for a brief few seconds you forget that she is a stranger. In this moment she is someone who understands your pain and that is more than enough for you. When you pull away you see Alexia and Alba, you feel extremely exposed.
“Hi. You must be Alba” you wipe the last of your tears and extend your hand towards the younger Putellas.
She swats away your hand and pulls you into a hug.
“So formal” Alba laughs “you’re even hotter in person”
“Alba!” Both Eli and Alexia scold her.
“What? I’m being honest”
“Thank you, I think. Is that mine?” You point the bad Alexia is holding.
“Yes. Sorry for the mix up”
“No, no. It was my fault. I was running late for dinner with Ingrid. I left yours in the hall as I wasn’t sure where to put it”
Alexia stared at you almost as if frozen in place.
“Was I not suppose to do that? I can go get it for you”
“This is the most you’ve spoken to me since joining” Alexia was honest with what she was thinking.
“It must be the Christmas air” you laugh a little “speaking of, you three clearly have plans so I will leave you be”
Eli tries to get you to stay but you can’t. The woman knew too much and even though shared the same pain, you knew it was only a matter of time before the pity eyes came. You also didn’t know how much the two sisters had heard.
Alexia asked and asked what the you and her mother were talking about but the woman refused to tell. The only answer Alexia got was to be careful with you and that not all is as it seems. It seemed to be enough for Alexia but she wasn’t giving up on you, not just yet.
She kept an eye on you over the Christmas break and just as you said you stayed in Barcelona. Alexia all but stalked your Instagram and even went as far as texting you some recommendations. You felt something towards the midfielder and it made you think that you might have been a little harsh on her. You made a mental reminder to speak to her once the break was over.
The first game back was away to Bilbao and it brought you the perfect opportunity to speak to Alexia as the two of you were roomed together. It was late by the time you got there so everyone went straight to their room.
“Oh Y/N I don’t know what happened” Alexia says as she swiped the room key.
“What are you — oh I see”
There was only one bed, albeit a large double bed.
You hadn’t shared a bed in almost a year and you wasn’t sure if you were ready for it. Now you had to find a way to explain this to Alexia.
“I’ll sleep on the floor” Alexia suggests and even though you weren’t ready, you also knew you wasn’t going to let her do that.
“Alexia you are one of the most important players on the team. I cannot let you sleep on the floor. Take the bed, I’ll take the floor”
“Y/N, you are important too. You are our highest goal scorer. I am taking the floor, don’t argue with your captain”
She refused to take no for an answer and you hated it. When you came out the shower Alexia was on the floor and it looked awful. It was almost funny and you couldn’t help but chuckle.
“Don’t say anything. Bed” Alexia laughed along with you.
The room was dark except from the street lights then peaked through the curtains. Sleep wasn’t coming easy to you and by the sounds of tossing and turning, Alexia was struggling too.
“Alexia, come sleep in the bed” The thought of having someone sleep next to you wasn’t something you necessarily wanted but Alexia sleeping on the floor wasn’t fair.
“I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable”
There was something in her tone. She wasn’t talking about sharing the bed with a team mate, she was talking about sharing a bed in general.
“She told you” Eli had to have told alexia about your conversation.
“Who?” Alexia asked even though she knew you were talking about her mother.
“Your mother. She told you about what I said”
“I asked but she didn’t tell me anything. I’m sorry that something happened to your friend”
You sat up upon hearing her condolences.
“My friend. What are you talking about?”
Alexia, now sat up too, looked at you as if saying you know what I’m talking about.
“Natalia?”
She said her name. Nobody had said her name. They knew it would cause too much pain.
In that moment you are brought back to the last time someone said her name. It was the 5 November 2023 in a hospice not to far from your shared home in London. Natalia was the strongest woman you knew and no one would ever come close to her in your eyes. Yet just after Euros she told you that her time was coming, that the cancer was starting to win. You begged her to fight, you weren’t ready to lose her but you knew that you had been on borrowed time for many many years. The last person to say her name was a nurse as your wife took her final breath before she was called home.
“She was my wife” you could feel your nose twitch as a ball of emotion built in your throat. You knew the day was coming when you talked about her but you didn’t think it would come in Bilbao with Alexia now sitting at the foot of your bed.
The Catalonian knew she heard you correctly but she still sat in disbelief. She had no idea you were dating anyone let alone you were married. Alexia could do nothing but watch as you bury your head in your hand as your body racks with sobs. She wants to hug you, to hold you and to tell you to let it out but you weren’t that close.
When you aggressively wipe your eyes you notice Alexia looking prettified and you cannot help but burst of into a fit of giggles.
“I’m going to go get Lucy or Keira or anyone else who isn’t me” your captain panics and makes a bee line for the door. She is stopped in her tracks as your hand grabs her wrist.
“You don’t have to”
She didn’t believe you and that was made obvious as her eyes dart back and forward between you and the door.
“Isn’t this what you have been wanting? To know why I walked away” you pat the side of the bed next to you.
You saw the hesitation is Alexia’s eyes. In that moment she wanted to respect your boundaries and you appreciated that but for the first time in a while the thought of talking about Natalia didn’t make you feel like you would break.
Once she sat down you turn to face you and you saw the look many people had given you. She felt sorry for you.
“I didn’t know you were married”
“Not many people did. We never hid anything. If you look you’ll see her in a lot of photos, she always supported me” you get comfy knowing that this is going to be a long conversation “I’m a private person and all I ever wanted to do was protect her”
In that moment Alexia understood for she too was a private person. She knew that she was in the limelight but she still kept herself to herself off the pitch.
“How did she—“ Alexia stopped talking as soon as she realised what she was about to ask “sorry, I shouldn’t have said that”
“Leukemia” you closed your eyes, took a deep breath and counted to three “she first got it when she was six. We used to take the day off school to go to the hospital. She would call me her emotional support friend” you laugh as you remember the way she made you wear a badge “she won the battle only for it to come back when she was 16 then again at 28. The third battle was the hardest for her and it was the one she lost”
Alexia caught the way you couldn’t look at her whilst you talked about the hardest times of your wife’s life.
“She sounds like a strong woman”
“Oh she was the strongest. She went through so much yet you never would have known it. Natalia had this heart that was big enough to like up the whole world. I wouldn’t be where I am today without her. She supported me in the youths teams, was in the stands when I made my Arsenal debut and moved to France with me when I signed for Lyon. She said she’s followed me everywhere because she knew I’d be lost with her”
When Alexia sees you laughing, she joins in too.
“Things got bad just before the euros. I was so close to withdrawing but she begged me to go. She wanted to see me lift that trophy and I did, I did it for her. I didn’t know how bad it was until afterwards and I made the decision to be by her side. We did all the things on her bucket list. A couple of months later she couldn’t fight it anymore. Her strength was gone and the light was barely there. I was able to be by her side as she took her last breath”
Alexia didn’t stop you as you got off the bed and made your way towards the window. She could tell by the way your hand went straight to your face that you were crying.
“You wanted to know why I walked about?” You turned to face her and in that moment, knowing what she did, Alexia felt guilty. Guilty for reminding you of the loss you had suffered.
“I walked away because I didn’t feel like I had a purpose. For so many years I played for her. I scored to see a smile on her face and I won my trophies so that I can give her my medals. I couldn’t return to Lyon without her and it felt wrong being in England”
“Y/N I’m —“
“Don’t tell me you’re sorry. You didn’t kill her, the cancer did”
You hated it when people told you they were sorry for your loss. Why? Why are they sorry? You heard it so many times that it made you numb.
Alexia could tell that you were feeling a lot right now. She wanted to be there if you wanted to talk more about Natalia but she also knew the importance of changing the subject when it’s needed.
“Can I ask you a question?” She looked at you with a sincere gaze.
“You can. Is it about Na—“
Alexia shakes her head.
“Why Barcelona?”
It is a question that she had been desperate to know. You have now told her why you weren’t ready to go back to Lyon but plenty of teams would have offered you a contract if you announced your return.
“I said it wasn’t about her but turns out it was. Talia loved Spain and Barcelona was her favourite place. I honestly thought I would retire at Lyon but she always said that if she could pick a team I play for them she would choose Barcelona. When I decided to come back, it felt right to sign for Barcelona. Also, Lucy and Keira are here. As you have seen, I have depended on them quite a bit and I knew that it wouldn’t be easy so having someone who knew made everything easier”
You could see Alexia processing what you had told her.
“I’m happy you don’t play for Lyon anymore”
“Yeah, you might be able to beat them now”
Alexia stared you down and you wondered what her next move would be. Turns out you didn’t have to wait long because a pillow soon smacked you in the face.
You both burst into laughter when the pillow fight turns competitive.
“We really should be getting some sleep” Alexia says as she stands.
You took a second to think.
“You can sleep in the bed Alexia. I won’t freak out you know”
“Y/N I can’t. Not now”
“Oh stop. I’m not some fragile little doll that will break if she shares a bed with someone. Now get in bed”
You pull the duvet back and pat the bed. It is only when Alexia gets in that you realise she is on your side and you are on Talia’s.
“You know this is my side of the bed” Alexia says as she gets comfy.
You had your reasons for sleeping on that side. You want to be closest to the door in case someone broke in. You wonder if Alexia has a reason.
“Got to make sure no one comes in and kidnaps you. Buenas noches Y/N”
You fall asleep that night with ease. You no longer feel the weight of keeping your emotions at bay and having Alexia knowing the truth makes you feel at ease around her for the first time since you joined the club.
From that day on things were different between you and Alexia. You found yourself spending more time with her than you did with Lucy and Keira. The two of them found it strange but didn’t question it. Whilst the defender was still very much protective over you, she did see a change in her captain which lead to her giving her the benefit of the doubt.
Life in Barcelona was finally what you imagined. Even in January the sun was shining and the sky was blue, unlike the weather you have been used to. The pain in your heart was still there but for the first time in a long whilst you felt happy or at least the closest thing to it that you could feel. Alexia has invited you to family dinner which happened after every other home game. Her mother and sister made you feel welcome. You had become rather close with Eli as she would often reach out to talk to you and check in with you. She didn’t need to say much, the fact that she could understand was more than enough.
Alba was quite the character and there was never a dull moment with her. She would relentless tease her sister and it had you holding stomach with laughter.
You had received some calls that made you think about a few things. You thought about talking to Lucy and Keira about it but you knew their decision would be biased so you confided in Alexia one night as the two of you walked Nala along Barceloneta. She helped you work though the feelings that the question brought up and by the the time you arrived back to your apartment, which you learnt was in the building opposite to hers, you knew what your decision would be.
During the game against Atleti there was a certain Dutchwoman in attendance. It was the second to last game before the Nations league semi final, a game that England has got to by the skin of their teeth. Barcelona came away with a 2-0 win and a lot of the players stayed out on the pitch afterwards to greet the fans that came to support them.
Sarina stood near the locker room and praised the team as they entered.
“Are you here for Lucy and Keira?” Aitana asked as she walked down the hall.
Behind her walked the two English women, along with Alexia. The latter knew to expect her, it made sense for her to come see you in person. The other two clearly had no idea that their national team coach was coming.
“She isn’t here for them”
Alexia’s words cause Lucy and Keira’s heads to turn in surprise.
“Y/N’s still out on the pitch. She is playing with Irene’s son Matteo, shall I go get her?”
“No, I can wait”
Just as three of them were about to enter they hear your voice followed by a child’s laughter. You walked down the tunnel with Irene and her little boy. Sarina saw just how happy you were and for a brief moment she regretted coming. She questioned whether or not this is what is best for you.
“Gaffa” you saw the look on your team mates faces and chuckled. Surely they knew it was only a matter of time before Sarina came knocking “Let me get showered quickly and we will go”
“But we’re going out tonight. It’s team night” Aitana sulked.
“I’ll meet you guys there”
Alexia and you shared a look. She knew what this conversation was going to be about and she was pretty sure she knew what the outcome would be and she was worried. You squeezed her shoulder and smiled before going into the locker room.
It was over 3 hours later that you finally enter the restaurant that the team were eating at.
All heads turned to you as you walked through the door. The seat reserved for you happened to be next to Alexia which you don’t think was an accident. Lucy and Keira were sat opposite you and you see the look of suspense in their eyes. They hadn’t officially been told what you and Sarina were talking about but they had very good guesses.
The rest of the team were having their own conversations and you didn’t want to make a scene so you nodded your head and that was enough confirmation for them.
“Yes!!” Lucy stood up suddenly and slammed her hands on the table.
“Holy fuck. Lucia, sit down”
Lucy does as her told.
“Our captain is back” Keira said to herself.
You tried your best to include yourself in the conversations around you but your mind kept wandering. You found yourself staring off into the distance. It is only when you feel a gentle hand on your thigh do you realise just how spaced out you were.
“Is everything ok? Did your coach say something because if she did then—“
“Stand down Ale” Alexia’s eye soften at the nickname. It wasn’t a new one for her but you had only just started calling her it and she loved it “I’m just thinking is all. What if I’m not good enough? What if I don’t have a place in that team anymore?” You lean into her and whisper.
“Y/N, they are your team. Yes you took some time away but you lead them for a long time and you told me they knew your reasons. It might take some time to get back into things but you will soon be back to how you were before. Besides if things go well for both of us then we will have a World Cup rematch on our hands and I want to see what might have happened if you played in the summer”
Oh you didn’t think about that. You hadn’t given your upcoming opponents a second thought. Alexia was right. If England beat France then they will face Spain in the national league final.
You thought there might be some awkwardness when you walked through the doors at the England camp but you couldn’t have been more wrong. Each player welcomed you with open arms and the players that you didn’t know as much treated you like everyone else did.
There were a few moments when you got pulled aside by Sarina for what she called her mental health checks. She promised that nothing said between you would be told to anyone else and you chose to believe her. You were honest about how heavy the shirt felt when it had the England badge on and you told her of the nerves you were feeling about playing for your country again.
Alexia had kept texting you to check in and for the most part you told her the truth. It was the day before the match when you got overwhelmed and instead of lying, you chose to ignore her. You knew it wasn’t fair but wanted to stay focused. You could bury your feelings for 24 hours. Alexia on the other had wasn’t going to give up on you.
“Alexia” Jenni nudged her friends leg “Earth to Alexia”
The woman in question had her eyes glued to the her phone as you sent you yet another message.
“What do you want!” Alexia snaps.
“Hey, don’t snap at me. Who you texting? Is it a girl?” Jenni peaked over her shoulder.
“No” Alexia pulled her phone closer to her chest “It’s Y/N”
“Y/N Y/L/N is a girl last time I checked” Jenni couldn’t help but tease.
“She but I don’t like her like that, well I do. Wait! I don’t” Alexia slumps down in her seat “Oh Jenni, I don’t know how I feel”
Jenni hasn’t seen her friend like this in a long while. Normally Alexia knows what wants and isn’t afraid to go for it. This though is different. It’s almost like she knows what she wants but she is hesitating and Alexia doesn’t hesitate.
“It’s ok not to know but something is clearly bothering you. What is it?”
“She is ignoring me”
“Last time I saw you you told me she didn’t want anything to do with you”
So much had changed since then and she didn’t know how to explain it. In the end she told her everything she could without going into the finer details. Alexia confesses her feelings and explains that she cannot get a hold of you and that none on your team mates were answering either.
“Alexia, I may not know why she stopped playing football but I saw the way she played, she loves the sport. Her playing for England again is a big deal. Everyone is talking about her press conference she did this morning, it’s all over social media”
Alexia wasn’t aware of a press conference. She never goes on social media the day before a match because it is quite often a distraction. Jenni picks up on her friend’s obliviousness and gives alexia her phone so she can see what is being said.
Jenni was right. You are everywhere.
Y/N Y/L/N makes her return but what does it mean? Why now?
Sarina Weigman confirm Y/N is the captain of this team despite turning her back on them.
Beth Mead ruled out for Semi final, should be back for final if England are successful.
World Cup rematch? Y/N says that Spain wouldn’t have won if she was playing.
Alexia read headline after headline, article after article. She was beginning to feel overwhelmed so she couldn’t imagine what you must have been feeling. The last headline made the Catalonian laugh because she too had thought about what the outcome might have been if you were playing.
“I think the last one is a stretch” Jenni mumbles.
“We will never know” Alexia is ever more determined to get a hold of you. Just as she was about to call you again, a message comes through.
Hi. Sorry I haven’t been around, it’s been a lot. Thank you for checking in on me Alexia, I promise you I’m ok. Good luck in your match tomorrow.
“She’s ok” Alexia tells Jenni as if the forward was the one who was worried about you.
The next day you wake up and are ridden with nerves. It’s not a familiar feeling and you know that you need to calm down before the game or things will end badly.
Despite protests from your team mates, you will start the game on the bench. It’s the right decision and you make sure to tell Sarina just that. Whilst the team’s recent performances have been spotty to say the least, you refuse to walk back in like nothing had changed. You know you need to earn your place on the pitch with the lionesses.
Spain’s game has an early kick off and finishes just after yours starts. The team get back to the hotel and have organised to watch it the hotel bar. Much to Alexia’s dismay she is called for Media seen as though Spain won and have qualified for the Olympics.
When she finally joins the team she knows that the first half is over but that’s it.
“What’s the score?” She asks anyone who is listening.
“2–0” Ona says.
“That’s—“ Alexia is cut off before she can finish her sentence.
“To Germany” Jenni knows that Alexia would have wanted England to win if for no other reason than you “Y/N is going on for Toone”
She cannot help the smile that tugs at her lips as your number goes on the subs board.
The world watches as Mary runs over to you and gives you the band.
“Welcome back skipper” Mary pushes the band up your arm before you can stop her because she know’s that is what you’ll do. She was there in the captain’s meeting when you told Sarina that you didn’t deserve the captaincy.
“Game on, Maz”
It felt right being on the pitch and wearing the three lions crest. You allow yourself to take in your return but only for a couple of seconds before you turn your attention to the game and the challenge that you face. 3 goals was a lot to ask for when Germany are playing as good as they are. It wouldn’t be easy and it would take everything you had but you never shied away from a challenge and you wasn’t about to start now.
After about ten minutes you found your rhythm and England were playing the type of football they are known for. It doesn’t take long for LJ to make a run and dance around the opposition. You have faith in her but follow her anyways in case she loses the ball. She doesn’t but Frohms does save her shot, she doesn’t save your rebound though.
“Get the ball” You shout to the Chelsea player.
When the match restarts, the lionesses are on the hunt. Shot after shot is taken but somehow the ball stays out the net. England get a corner in the 80 minute and you’re lurking on the edge of the box, ready to make your run. Popp is the one marking you because she has studied you new way of play since joining Barcelona. Chloe’s corner is pin point and no amount of research in the world could stop you from getting the second goal and tying the game.
Alexia finds herself up on her feet with Ona and a couple of your team mates when you get your brace.
“Vamos Y/N” she says.
“You do realise that we will face them if they win” Misa reminds her.
“Right now, I don’t care. She deserves this and I’m celebrating my team mate” Alexia didn’t care if she might face you in the final.
“She told you” Aitana whispers as she pulls her captain down to the sofa “That is why she doesn’t hate you anymore and why you’ve stopped interrogating her”
Alexia does nothing but nod. Her fellow midfielder didn’t need to know anything else and she doesn’t ask for it either. She accepts that the reason must be valid if Alexia has dropped her questions.
There are 4 minutes announced of stoppage time.
When you look up the the score board and see the number you get flashbacks on the euros final. You have been in this position before and came out victorious. Today was going to be no different.
It was huge mistake by Germany when Gwinn takes down Hemp about a meter outside the box.
In the past you have found yourself stood over the ball with Beth but this game it’s Alex who stands beside you.
With her hand over her mouth she gives you strict instructions.
“You’re taking it”
It’s not a question and you don’t argue.
“You have saved us tonight, now get your hattrick”
The amount of faith Alex had in you did wonders but it didn’t settle every nerve running through your body. Free kicks were your specialty, this wasn’t nothing new and the pressure was a familiar feeling.
As soon as you strike the ball you know it’s going in. It’s a hard feeling to describe but many call it shooters instinct, it had never been wrong and it wasn’t now. The ball floated over the wall and went in the further part of the top corner. The shot was unsaveable. You ran over to the bench, more specifically to Sarina, to celebrate with the woman who gave you space and welcomed you back with open arms.
“It’s like you never left”
Her words caught you off guard. For a brief moment you agreed with her but you got hit by the feeling of grief, you looked towards the family section and there was no one supporting you. Maybe some things hadn’t changed but a lot certainly has. When the full time whistle was blown your team mates ran towards you, all of the congratulating you on your performance and your first game back.
It was a weird kind of celebrations that night. The team was split, half wanted to celebrate getting through the final and the other half knew the job wasn’t done, they knew that the biggest task was yet to be faced. Spain had beaten them before and on the greatest stage, the UEFA national league final could either repeat history and England could rewrite it.
The team travelled to Madrid that night, only hours after the game. Upon arrival almost everyone went to their rooms but not you. You knew sleep wouldn’t come easy so you decided to wander the streets of Madrid. It had become a habit of yours, you would walk around and people watch. Every human had their own story to tell and it made you forget about yours.
You had no destination planned yet you found yourself stopping outside a hotel, the one you know from your text messages with Alexia, was the one the Spain team was staying at.
A lot of feelings were running through you and you saw this as the universe’s sign that maybe you should talk about them. You have confided in Alexia since Sarina first reached out to you, she knew more than anyone how you really felt about returning and you talked about this very moment, the hours after your first game when the past is very much present in your mind. You remember the words she told you ‘when that happens you call me’ so that is what you do or at least that is what you go to do.
“Y/N” you hear a familiar voice say. You turn to see Jenni, Irene, Laia and Misa walking towards you.
“Hi guys” your voice is quiet, shy almost and you cannot help the way your eyes scan for Alexia knowing full well that these are the people she spends the most time with.
“What are you doing here?” Misa asks you. The two of you hadn’t formally been introduced but you had scored a brace against her in the El Classico.
“I’m—“
“Here for Alexia” Jenni says with a knowing look and you cannot help but feel like she knows something you don’t.
You can only nod. Apart from Irene, you didn’t know these girls very well and the version of yourself that you show to strangers is very different to the one that your friends see.
‘I can take you to her. We are roommates” Jenni seems sincere with her words but you feel a pang of jealousy. Everybody knew that the two of them used to date, it shouldn’t bother you, you had no right to be jealous yet that is exactly what you were feeling.
You think about it and Jenni can tell you are thinking about it.
“She hasn’t stopped talking about you and I know she will want to see you. She was your biggest fan when we watched the game” Jenni added hoping to create some sense of comfortability.
“She watched my game?” You asked in disbelief. You thought you had no one but maybe you did, maybe Alexia was the someone that was cheering you on but instead of the family area she was cheering you on from the hotel you were currently standing outside of.
“She did. I think she forgot she was Spanish for a minute” Irene says which causes you to laugh.
“I doubt that but I appreciate the support. You know I shouldn’t be talking to you, you guys are the enemy now”
“Yet you came here for our captain, she will be your enemy too. Come on, I’ll take you to her. We wouldn’t want you to be spotted outside our hotel, just think of the optics” Jenni once again says.
“Ok” you nod your head a few times to solidify your answer.
The girls lead you through the hotel but only Jenni and Irene stay with you, Misa and Laia walk ahead. The longer you walk the more you begin wondering if this was a good idea. What if you are overstepping your boundaries. You had no right to be here and could easily be turned away at any point.
You enter the lounge area of the hotel which holds the majority of the Spanish national team yet your eyes search for only one. She see’s you before you see her and is walking over to you with a worried look on her face.
“Estas bien? What are you doing here?” Alexia’s arm rests on your shoulder.
“It was an accident. I was out for a walk and I ended up here” you explained.
“She was asking for you” Jenni says even though technically it wasn’t true. In her eyes she wanted to play matchmaker after it was made evidently clear that Alexia was hesitant to peruse things with you even though she had feelings for you.
“Is this true?” Alexia asks and you nod.
“We won, I returned, I scored, wore the armband and I didn’t have anyone is stands” you whispered so only she could hear you.
The look in your eyes changed. For the first time that night you showed your true emotions. Alexia didn’t need to hear anything else. She grabbed your hand and escorted you to the outdoor seating area. She sat down whilst your paced the patio.
“Y/N, come sit down” Alexia pats the seat next to her and you comply “Are you ok, really? What made you come here to me?”
“I’m not ok but I’m more ok than I thought I would be. It’s been quite a day, that game was —“
“Incredible. You changed the entire play”
“It felt right. I belong on the pitch with the girls, I should never have left” You didn’t register that you felt guilty about your absence until you said the words out loud to Alexia.
“You needed to. You had to process your loss and you returned when you were ready”
Alexia was very understanding, you had to give her that.
“That answers my first question but the second” the Catalonian didn’t want to push but there had to be a reason and until she heard the truth she was filled with worry. You had been walking the streets of Madrid, alone, at almost midnight.
“Why am I here?” You repeated it. Maybe you hoped that hearing the question again would help you figure out an answer, it did “I wanted to celebrate…….with you. I was surrounded by my team, people I consider family yet you were the one I wanted to call and tell about the game”
You dipped your head when you felt yourself getting emotional. You were suppose to be happy but with everything you were feeling you were overwhelmed. On top of what you were feeling you couldn’t ignore the way your heart beat twice as fast because Alexia was sat opposite you with her hand now resting on your thigh.
When you looked up Alexia noticed the the tears in your eyes and was quick to wipe away one when it fell.
“I shouldn’t be feeling this way Alexia, it is wrong” you met her eye as you made your version of a confession.
“You can be happy about playing football again Y/N. Natalia would have wanted you to be”
“Don’t say her name, not now” you shook your head and Alexia’s hand fell back to its prior place on your thigh.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to overstep. I can give you space if that what you need” the blonde stands, ready to leave you be but you grab her hand and pull her back down.
“I don’t want space and that is the problem. I wasn’t talking about the game Alexia. I shouldn’t be feeling this way about you” you shook your head in disbelief. You were sure that your shot of happiness died with your wife but you have developed feelings for Alexia and could no longer deny it.
“Y/N” Alexia cupped your face so that you would look at her but when you did, her hand didn’t move.
“Ale” you melted into her touch. That very touch gave you butterflies and you enjoyed the act of intimacy.
The two of you went silent but each of your thoughts were very loud. Alexia glanced at your lips, you knew what she was about to do and you didn’t stop her. Maybe you should have, maybe you should have pulled away but you didn’t. You didn’t move when her lips hovered centimetres from your own, you let her kiss you. You froze in the moment, like a deer in headlights. It was only when you closed your eyes did you realise what was happening. The kiss felt like you were cheating, it felt wrong yet felt so right.
“You shouldn’t have done that. We can’t do this. It was wrong” you pushed Alexia away and stood up hastily.
You stormed away before Alexia had the chance to speak. All eyes were on you as you walked through the sea of Spanish players. Their eyes went from you and then to Alexia who was running through, trying to catch up to you. She was hot on your heels until you turned to face her. She waited a couple of seconds before taking steps towards you.
“Stop” you say but she doesn’t “No!” you held you arm out to further imply your seriousness.
After that she can do nothing else but watch you walk away from her. Her hazel eyes stayed on you until you were out the lobby doors and onto the streets of the Spanish capital.
Alexia was frozen in place. She has ruined everything by rushing but she felt something when she touched you, she felt a spark and that wouldn’t have happened if you didn’t feel the same thing she did. You told her that had feelings for her, you came all this way to see her. Those things meant something but maybe she had read it wrong, maybe it had all been in her head.
“Alexia, are you ok? You’re crying” Irene appeared in front of her. The woman in question was quick to wipe her eyes in hope that no one else would see her tears.
“I’m fine. It’s getting late, everyone should go to their rooms. We have a final to prepare for and we need to be at our best” Alexia walked away.
The two of you were very quiet in the upcoming days and were laser focused on the task at hand. Beat the opposing team and being the first even UEFA Nations League champions. Both of your team mates could tell something was wrong but they didn’t know what to do. Your team mates wasn’t aware of your late night adventures until Aitana texted Keira to ask if you were ok and told her that Alexia wasn’t after you showed up at their hotel. The English midfielder kept this to herself given that Lucy has only just got started talking to Alexia and there were a few players on the team who’s protectiveness could rival the defenders.
By the time the day of the final came around there was plenty of reason for concern but both teams knew that this is what you had been working towards. Yes, a trophy was on the line but it was the previous trophy that was the topic of conversation.
The first time Alexia saw you was when they arrived for the pitch inspection. You were near the goal with LJ, it has become a new pre match routine for the two of you. Well you did it the game a couple of days ago and you won that so the two of you gravitated towards the goal today.
Alexia wanted to go to you and that is what she was going to do until she felt a hand grab her wrist.
“Alexia”
She turned to face Keira.
“Leave her be”
“I didn’t mean to upset her. We were talking about feelings and then I kissed her, I couldn’t help it. It felt right in the moment” Alexia couldn’t stop talking. It’s like was making a confession and Keira would be the one deciding whether or not it was a sin.
Meanwhile the English midfielder couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Sure she had suspected something was going on between the two of you but she also had a strong sense that you wasn’t ready for anything knew. In her eyes you were still healing.
“You kissed her?” Keira whispered as not to bring attention to their conversation.
Alexia was about to explain further but Keira stopped her as she sure her other team mate coming towards them.
“Lucy is coming. I will talk to you about this later”
It was as if Keira flipped a switch. Her look of concern was replaced with a smile and she even put on a fake laugh so Lucy wouldn’t arrive to an awkward silence. Soon enough it was a gathering of Barcelona players yet Alexia could stay focused on what her friends were saying for you were beginning to walk towards her.
In your eyes you wanted to talk to Alexia and you knew you needed to. The other night was a lot for you to process but you did owe her an explanation for leaving, that much you did know. She looked good as you watched her enter the pitch. You let your eyes linger in the most discreet way possible.
“You and Putellas?” LJ asked you. She wasn’t aware of what happened, nor did she know you were married. In her eyes, you were hiding something and she wasn’t wrong.
“We are friends…..I think. It’s complicated” you admitted knowing that Lauren wouldn’t push you further.
“Uncomplicate it” she suggested.
“If only it was that easy. Let’s head in and get ready”
You felt the change in heartbeat again as you got closer to where Alexia was standing. Your head might have been all over the place but you heart was being very clear in what it wanted only you weren’t ready to admit it.
“Y/N” Alexia shouted to you as you walked past her.
“Hi” for whatever reason, you pulled her into a hug “Good luck today, you’re going to need it”
You both started laughing at the quick change of energy.
“I don’t think it’s us that need luck. We beat you in the summer” Alexia was cocky but she wasn’t confident.
“You didn’t beat me though” you couldn’t help but smile at her.
Your smile was genuine and that is something Alexia took great hope in seeing. Maybe you weren’t mad at her, maybe you just needed a little space.
What you said next doubled that hope.
“Come find me after the game”
Then just as quick as the hope was there, it wasn’t.
“We need to talk”
Those 4 words struck fear in Alexia but she didn’t have the chance to say anything because you were already down the tunnel by the time she came to her senses.
Your was brought up several times in the Spanish locker room and each time all eyes fell to Alexia for she is the one that knew you most. She had learnt how you think, what plays you are going to make before you make them. In her team’s eyes she knew how to stop you. Only it wasn’t that easy. Alexia did knew how you play but that style changes when you are hungry, like you have a point to prove and this game brought both of those things.
“Stop focusing on Y/N! If you focus on how to stop her then you’ve already lost. Focus on stopping her from getting the ball” That is the last thing she said before heading out into the tunnel.
The lionesses were waiting for her, she expected it. It was an intimidation tactic. You weren’t there and that was a surprise, she would have bet good money that you would be in the starting 11. Mary stood opposite her and smirked when she saw the look of bewilderment on the opposing players face.
Alexia wanted to say something, she kept looking back at the team. If she was paying attention she would notice that there was only 10 players on the England side of the tunnel. With her eyes now facing forward she didn’t see you walking towards the front of the line. The sound of your cleats fell on deaf ears.
Her head shot to the side when she caught a glimpse of you standing next to her with the pendent in your hand.
“Capital Y/L/N, nice to see you back where you belong” Alexia covered her mouth, her being well aware that there were cameras on her.
You shake your head at her greeting.
“Captain Putellas. You’re going to wish I wasn’t” you had one last attempt to get in her head.
“No I won’t. Win or lose today, this is something the world, myself included, has been waiting for”
You thought you would get a smart remark not a reply that was genuine.
“Alexia”
“Y/N”
Those were the last words spoken except from a good look after the coin toss.
You called a huddle before everyone got into place. This game was important, not only because of the trophy on the line but it was the lionesses chance at redemption. To prove that it was only one game.
“I want you all to do something for me. Play for right now, not for the past. You cannot change what happened in the summer, no matter how hard you try. Winning today won’t get you the star on the shirt but it can be the reset you guys have been wanting. That loss has been haunting you, I can see it by the look on your faces and I promise you here today that if you play with revenge in your hearts then you will fail. Yes, this is Spain but we are England. We don’t stay down, we get up and fight. We stand together as a team, a pride. We go out there and leave everything on the pitch”
Each player is hooked on every word as you give Mary the signal.
“England on three”
You all come together one more time before getting in position.
Alexia tries to do the same by most of the team is watching you.
“She is going to make it hard” Olga tells her captain.
“She is going to make our lives hell for the next 90 minutes but that’s not to say we can’t give it back. Look at that star on your shirt, we got that by beating this team. Yes, Y/N wasn’t playing but she is one player. As good as she may be, we are better. You’ve seen what everyone is saying, they are calling our World Cup win a fluke, that we didn’t win but England lost. We may have qualified for the Olympics but our job is not done. We have a trophy to win. Vamos Espana”
Just like England did, Spain come together before readying themselves for the game.
The game which starts in the worst possible way for the away team. It seems the your players might be a bit more nervous that they are letting on. Inside the first 15 minutes Salma gets through on goal and sends Spain up 1-0. It wasn’t ideal but it didn’t mean the game was over either. You were playing safe, as a way to get the most out of the team around you. When the first half is done with you haven’t take a single shot on goal.
Spain entered the tunnel happy and England entered it less so.
The atmosphere was eerie in the locker room and you could see the self doubt radiating off your team mates.
Sarina takes the floor and explains all sorts of strategies but nobody is listening. They are in their own head.
“Do you mind?” You walk up to Sarina hoping to have a talk with your team. The coach happily steps aside.
“How many of you are thinking about the World Cup? Raise your hand” nobody does and you decide to call bullshit “You’re lying and I won’t have that. You are telling me none of you are out there thinking of the summer? the picture of them lifting the trophy that should have been yours?”
One by one players begin lifting their hands.
“I can stand here and say I haven’t been good enough. I need to be better and I will be better. In 45 minutes we will be crowned champions. The question is are we going to do it in style or are we going to make it harder for ourselves? We know what we need to do and we will do it”
You leave the locker room and go back out onto the pitch. You are the first one out there and you take a minute to look at the score board. 1-0. You hated to lose but more than that, you hated to let people down. You made the decision to come back and you didn’t do that to come second. You returned to be a champion and to make Natalia proud, you wasn’t doing to let her down. You had spent the past couple of days trying not to think about her and maybe that was the problem. She was your greatest strength, your biggest supporter and she may be no longer with you, you may be beginning to move on but that doesn’t mean you have to forget about her. No, you need to play for her just as you always did.
The first ten minutes of the second half it was like a different team was on the pitch. England were pushing and pressing and Spain were struggling. In the 67 minute was when the game was made even once again. You and hempo were tiring out the defence and it made them vulnerable. On one counter attack they couldn’t keep up. Irene was the only player standing between you and Cata but she could see Hempo running up beside you. She found herself in a lose lose situation so she stuck with you in hopes that the pressure would work, it didn’t. You pull her in just enough to give hempo enough space. At the last minute you passed to your left and she fired the ball into the back of the net.
Game on.
Spain were beginning to tire and the one touch football that was known around the world began to work in favour of England. They were unable to play out from the back because you, Alessia, Hempo and LJ was pressing the defence. It was mind play and it was working.
It was during a corner where things got interesting.
“Keep going!” You clapped your hands to rally the team “we are in their heads, now we end it”
“You’re not in our heads” Alexia says as she chooses to mark you. It was a tactic they hadn’t done yet, so far Jenni had marked you.
“Just you saying that is proof that we are but feel free to prove me wrong” you had a minute to talk as the ref walk talking to Lucy and Irene.
“I will. Let’s make it interesting. You score right now and I’ll buy you a drink later”
“So that means I’ll be taking the trophy and your money? Oh you’re on”
Alexia followed you are you walked around the box as you got into position. You would end up in one or two places; front post or in the middle. Never did she think you would make a run for the back post and swap positions will Lucy. The change caught Alexia out and when the ball hit the back of the neck she shook her head in defeat.
She had played right into your hands. You had pulled her in with your words and left her hanging when you celebrated what would go on to be the winning goal of the game.
You had to take a moment when the game was over. Everyone was celebrating but you and Lucy made the effort to congratulate your club team mates of a game well played.
“Ay, Capi. You’re predictable you know that?” Lucy threw her arms around the Catalonian.
“Lucy!” You slapped her on the back of the head “What she meant to say is you guys played a good game and that we will see you in Paris”
“We’ll see them in Barcelona” Lucy tried to correct you.
“I mean on the pitch as opponents, idiot”
Alexia was to focused on what the defender said first to hear the bickering that was now taking place between the two of you.
“What did she mean?” Alexia asked you.
Lucy gave you a look before leaving the two of you be.
“You once told me that in order to see yourself as the best, you had to beat the best. Tonight you wanted to beat me”
“No, I —“
“You did and that’s ok. I wanted to beat you too. It’s our competitive nature. That need you had allowed us a way in. I didn’t know it would come from a corner, only that in at least one part of the game you will stick to me just so you could say you got the upper hand”
“I should have dropped you off, let Irene pick you up and followed Lucy” Alexia understands the error she made.
“You should have but don’t beat yourself up about it. That wasn’t our first plan or second. Our plan was for Hempo to tire Ona out and for Lucy to get inside Olga’s head. Without those two things happening, we wouldn’t have got the corner in the way we did”
Alexia didn’t know whether to be pissed off or impressed that you read her and her team so well.
“You deserve the win today. Go celebrate with your team”
“I will but remember you owe me a drink. I’ll text you the address of wherever we go. Invite the girls too”
Alexia watched you walk away but there was one more thing she wanted to tell you only she feared it would do more damage than good. In the end she bite the bullet and ran to you.
“Y/N”
“Hi again” you laughed “Do you want another explanation of our strategy? We can always watch the game back when we in home in Barcelona”
Home in Barcelona. There is something about the way you said it that made alexia feel warm and fuzzy inside. She quickly shook her head to rid herself of those thoughts and the overthinking that came with them.
“I just want to say that Natalia would have been proud of you today. Not just today but the other game too. I know it’s not my place to say that because I didn’t know her but you should know that. You—“ Alexia began rambling.
“Breathe. Thank you for saying that. I know she is looking down on me right now with a huge smile on her face and truth is if I think about her too much then I think I might cry so I don’t want to go into that right now. Thank you though”
Alexia couldn’t help but feel like she shouldn’t have said that.
The ceremony went by in the blind of an eye. One minute you are waiting for Spain to collect their medals, the next you are raising the trophy with Mary. Back in the locker room you find yourself staring at the medal on your neck. Never in your professional career had one stayed on your neck for this long and never has the gold felt so heavy. It felt like it was weighing you down so you take it off and stuff it into your back. You would talk about that means with your therapist if you had one.
Later on in the night you found yourself at the hotel bar with the rest of the team celebrating. You tried your best to be happy and part of you truly was but you life off the field was becoming more complicated and hard to ignore.
“Excuse me” you tell the group that included Leah, Georgia, Keira and Lucy.
“Should we be concerned?” Georgia asks.
“Yes but let her have a moment. These past ten days have been a lot for her” Lucy tells her friend.
They watched as you paced back and forth on the balcony. To the English it was warm outside but there was still a chill in the air and you weren’t wearing a jacket. Keira kept looking at her watch asking herself how long is long enough before she goes out to you.
Some of the Spanish team arrive about an hour after the lionesses. Some of them go to the bar, some go to friend but Alexia, well she only had one interest and she couldn’t it or more specifically couldn’t find you. Her eyes scanned the room one, twice and third time. She had her phone out ready to call just as she sees you.
Leah catches her walking towards you and wants to stop her.
“What is she doing” The blonde asks defensively “Y/N doesn’t want anything to do with her”
The Arsenal player has heard about you bust up when Keira visiting England over Christmas.
“Things are different now but I’m not sure this is the right thing to do. Alexia!” Keira shouts her club captain over.
“Hola. Congratulations again. You guys sure know how to party” she tried to be polite even though she had no interest in a conversation with anyone who wasn’t you.
“Thank you” Leah seems genuine “Were you going to see Y/N?”
Alexia nods.
“That might not be the best idea right now. I think she needs a minute to herself. It’s been quite the day for her”
“I know. That’s why I want to talk to her” Alexia knew that you might be been struggling but to her that was all the more reason for her to talk to you.
“She won’t even wear her medal” Georgia adds earning her a shove. As far as the English players are aware, Alexia didn’t know anything.
“That isn’t surprising. Every tournament until this one she has given her medal to Natalia” Alexia says as if it is the most obvious thing but your friends didn’t put two and two together.
“Wait” Lucy says “She told you about her?” Again, Alexia nods.
“When? She hasn’t talked about her since she passed” the defender added.
“After Christmas” Alexia explains but goes no further.
“That’s why she went to you the other night but then you—“
“Keira, I won’t talk about that right now. I just want make sure she is ok and I can’t do that if I am being interrogated by you”
With that Alexia leaves your friends speechless and makes her way towards the balcony.
As quietly as possible, Alexia slides the door open and closes it behind her. She didn’t want to startle you so she watched from a distance. Your face wasn’t puffy so you hadn’t been crying but your posture was stiff so you were stressed.
“They’ve spent the past hour burning holes in the back of my head from their staring yet you have come straight out” you turn to see Alexia resting against the door.
“I owe you a drink and —”
“And yet your hands are empty” you point to Alexia’s hand which as you stated aren’t holding a drink “You can come closer you know. I’m not going to blow”
“I know it’s just that—“
“The last time we were along I ran away crying” you laugh as you think back to that night. Things were going really well until they wasn’t.
“Are you going to let me finish a sentence or are you going to keep talking for me?”
You mumble an apology and signal for her to continue.
“Your friends know I know and I accidentally told keira we kissed”
“Figures. She has been hovering”
The two of you go quiet. It’s not awkward, it’s comfortable but even then it’s not what either of you wanted.
“You said we needed to talk” Alexia didn’t want to push things and you had told her this before the game.
“We do. What happened the other night it—“
“Shouldn’t have happened”
“Who is finishing the other’s sentences now”
“Lo siento”
“As I was saying” you send her smirk so she knows she isn’t in trouble “The other night was very overwhelming for me, not because I didn’t like what happened but because I did. I told you that I had feelings and those feelings are for you Alexia. You make me feel things that I thought I’d never feel again. I promised my heart and love to her Alexia and to feel these things for someone else is like an act of betrayal. It feels wrong but I don’t want those feelings to stop. You kissed me and I knew it was going to happen yet I didn’t to stop it. I shouldn’t have ran away like that”
“It was a lot for you, I understand that” Alexia tried to reassure you that it was ok.
“It was but I should have stayed. You wanted to talk to me and I didn’t give you the opportunity. Just because I lost someone doesn’t mean that it’s only my feelings that matter. I’m sorry Alexia”
Alexia couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Since you said the words ‘we need to talk’ she has been trying to think of all the things you could have said, an apology was not one of them.
“Can I say what I would have that night?” Alexia asks and you nods your head whilst closing the distance between you.
“Those feelings you talked about, I feel them too. Things changed between us after you told me and I couldn’t ignore it, trust me I tried. I was also aware of your loss and that this might not be something you are ready for so I talked to my mum one night. She is the only other person I know who has experienced the same loss you have. I told her that I had fallen for you and that I wanted to act on my feelings. You know what she told me? She told me that time heals all wounds but no amount of time is the same. If I wanted to prove to you that I truly liked you then I would need to take it slow so that is what I am willing to do. If you want to pursue this then we will take it slow, as slow as you need. You said it feels like an act of betrayal and I respect that. I won’t push you into anything you’re not ready for”
Alexia reached out for you and noticed once again tears were falling down your face.
“I have made you cry again. I shouldn’t have said anything. Y/N I am so sorry”
“Alexia, these aren’t sad tears” you reach for her hand “I can’t promise you that this will be easy. When Natalia died she took a lot of my heart with her and I don’t know how much is left but I want to share what I have left with you. Please be patient with me Alexia because I don’t know how to do this again. For most of my life it has been her and I but now I get the chance at happiness again, with you. We can take this slow?”
“We will go as slow are you want. I have nothing but time for you Y/N”
Alexia knew what to say and for the first time in a long time you found yourself leaning forward. Just as you were about to kiss her she moves and kisses your cheek.
“Slowly Y/N” Alexia winked causing you to chuckle “How about we go for dinner when we return to Barcelona?“
“I would really like that”
“Me too. Now if I remember correctly I owe you a drink” Alexia holds the door open so that you both can rejoin the party.
“That does seem to be the case. Make it a double. It’s not every day you pull one over on La Reina to score the winning goal” you shoved her playfully.
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floodgates
alexia x reader
alexia is struggling post knee surgery and just as she’s about to finally talk to r, r gets hurt, and it’s partially alexia’s fault.
cw: injury... nothing else really.
-----
Alexia was stoic. Your girlfriend never let anyone know what she was really thinking. You were the exception, and even then, you still had to pry her feelings out of her.
It had been a long few months. Alexia's injury, the speculation surrounding her renewal, continued issues with the federation. Through it all, Alexia had been stony faced. Even with you, where she was normally more vulnerable, she had remained detached, as if the emotions surrounding these things did not exist.
If there was one thing you knew about Alexia, it was that you couldn't push her. She would come to you, in her own time, when she was ready. It sometimes took longer than you would have liked, but she always came around, in the end.
You could read her well, and you knew when she was inching closer to a breakdown. On the day that you were sure it was going to happen, positive that she would pull you into bed after training and cling to you, not letting go until she felt better, you broke your nose.
Well, more specifically, Alexia broke your nose. It was a complete accident; you'd been visiting her in the gym where she'd been doing her training. The team had finished early, and Alexia still had a few exercises to go, so you were keeping her company.
If it was anyone's fault, it was Mapi's. She was fucking around on the massage table, throwing little pieces of paper across the gym at you, while she got her knee massaged. You knew she hated the process, and even with Ingrid sitting next to her, slyly holding her hand, she needed a distraction, and pissing you off seemed to be it. She launched another little ball at you. You'd been looking down at your phone when the paper hit you in the head, and you glared at the defender, leaning down to pick it up.
Alexia didn't know how close behind her you were, as she finished up talking to the physio. She had her heavy water bottle in her hand and she was swinging it around like she was a toddler that couldn't hold still, yet another hint that she was going to be upset once you both got home.
You'd barely picked up the paper before another one was landing a few inches closer to your girlfriend, ricocheting off your head. Mapi's shout of alarm came a second too late, and you leaned closer to the ball, and to the blonde, just as she switched hands with her water bottle, swinging it directly back into your face.
Your nose made a sickening crunch, and Alexia turned around in horror, dropping her water, and immediately trying to kneel down by where you were leaning over. Her knee protested, though, at the sudden movement, and she yelped in pain, falling back onto her butt. Her face burned with embarrassment as you shook off the physio, blood gushing through your fingers.
"Ale, are you okay?" You asked, the words barely understandable as you spoke through the blood, and through your hands. Your nose was visibly split open, yet your attention was only on Alexia as she got to her feet, taking your face in her hands. She was wracked with guilt, taking the towel someone handed her and replacing your hands with hers.
"Lo siento mucho, mi amor, dios mio." Alexia said roughly. The physios finally sprung into action, gently pushing Ale out of their way, and moving closer to inspect your nose.
"It's okay, baby, it's not your fault." You promised, trying to send her a smile as you were led out of the gym and towards a medical room.
Alexia stood, arms hanging limply at her sides, as she blinked at the door you exited through. She looked like she was malfunctioning, taking a few steps closer to the door before stopping, completely and uncharacteristically unsure of herself. Mapi and Ingrid, forgotten on the massage table, watched their captain act in a way they'd never seen before.
"Ingrid. Go fix her." Mapi said out of the corner of her mouth. Ingrid nodded, walking closer and putting a hand on her captain's arm. Alexia jumped slightly, but drew herself up to her full height. She looked fearsome, glaring around Ingrid at the Norwegian's girlfriend.
"Idiota, María." She hissed, before stalking out of the room and following you down the hall, where, presumably, she would revert back to Soft Alexia.
Ingrid sighed, returning to Mapi's side. "You and your damn paper balls."
"Do you think Ale is going to cut off her nose to give to her girl, or will she take mine?" Mapi wondered
"Yours for sure. Two birds, one stone."
-----
The drive home was completely silent. On your part, because it was hard to talk when you had an ice pack pressed to your face. Alexia was silent because she was rather conflicted; she felt horrible. For breaking your nose, yes. But also, because she was at the end of her patience, the end of her strength. She needed you. You were the only person she trusted to see her upset, but now you were hurt, and it was her fault and she couldn't burden you with this.
You would have noticed this, under normal circumstances, you would have picked on the guilt and anxiety radiating off your girlfriend. Your nose was killing you though, completely broken. It was to be seen whether you’d need surgery or not, depending on how the healing process went. You were concussion free, thank god, but you were being brought home and put on bed rest anyway, thanks to Alexia’s intimidating glare at the physio, who had quickly instructed you how Alexia wanted. So, you were rather distracted, focused instead of getting home, showering, eating something, and crawling into bed.
Alexia helped you out of the car and inside the house as if you were a priceless, fragile object, her hands resting on your back and shoulder so lightly you barely felt them. She made you sit down on the sofa, ignoring your arguments that you could help with dinner and heading into the kitchen. She just made 2 sandwiches, bringing one out to you, beginning to eat in silence. She was practically glued to you, the entire left side of her body pressed against yours. It was at this moment that you realized she had yet to speak a word since walking into the house.
“Ale, are you feeling alright?” You asked, because it was easier to get Alexia to admit weakness when she could play it off to being sick. You could convince her to be honest later, but for now, you needed her to speak, even a word.
“I am okay. Care if I shower first?” She asked, standing up and taking your plate out of your hands.
You honestly did mind, but you nodded easily, not really feeling like denying her anything at this point.
“Can I join you?” You asked, smiling softly at her. Alexia was normally never one to deny herself the chance to shower with you, and this time was no different. The smallest of smiles tugged at her lips, and she nodded eagerly, grabbing your hand and pulling you in the direction of the bathroom.
-------
Alexia tried to hold herself together, she really did. It was a lot harder than it had ever been, though, and every time she caught sight of your swollen face, she felt herself inch closer and closer to a breakdown. Her emotions had been too much, before, but now? Compounded with the guilt she was feeling, they were completely overwhelming.
She made it through most of the shower, and it was only as you rinsed the conditioner from your hair, the last thing you needed to do, that she broke. It was dumb, but seeing you flinch as your hand accidentally brushed over your nose was just too much for her, and very suddenly, there were teardrops sliding down her face that she hoped you would think were just from the shower head.
Alexia bit her lip in an attempt to silence the sob that was ripping it’s way out of her chest, but was not very successful. You opened your eyes, finding Alexia stood in front of you, with a hand covering her face, now silently crying.
“Baby,” you sighed, turning the water off and pulling Alexia through the glass door. You wrapped a fluffy towel around your girlfriend’s shaking shoulders, more than a little concerned with the way she let you guide her out of the shower. “Is it your knee?” You asked, although you were pretty sure it wasn’t. You had to check, though, that had to be your first thought, because it was always Alexia’s first thought.
Alexia shook her head, moving her hand to cup your cheek, exposing her bloodshot eyes. Her lips fell into a sad frown as she looked down at you. “I broke your nose,” she mumbled miserably, her fingers tracing delicately over your swollen face.
“No, Mapi made you break my nose.” You corrected, trying to lighten the mood. It didn’t work, and Alexia just shook her head, gripping the towel tight around her. She looked so vulnerable, so small, so unlike herself, it was tearing your heart out of your chest.
You pulled on her hand, guiding her into the bedroom and gently pushing her to sit on the edge of the bed, walking away briefly to get her some pajamas to change into. She pulled them on, her eyes still fixed on the ground, now refusing to look at your face. You wondered if it was the fear of the vulnerability of eye contact or the fear of seeing your broken nose that stopped her. Either way, it wouldn’t do.
You tilted her chin up, her wet hazel eyes meeting yours. “You broke my nose, you haven’t played in months, the federation is making your teammates miserable, and you’re exhausted.”
“I am okay,” she whispered, so faintly and so pathetically that you had to resist the urge to roll your eyes.
“Don’t lie, love. You’re not okay. You haven’t been for a while. It’s catching up to you, huh?”
“Sí.” Alexia admitted, one of her hands wrapping itself around your leg, holding you in place close to her, as if she was afraid that the very simple confession would make you run.
“You need me, yes?”
“I broke your nose.” Alexia said again, a few tears sliding down her cheeks.
You wiped them away gently. “Alexia.”
The blonde sighed shakily. “Te necesito.”
“Bueno. Get under the covers, I’ll be right back.”
Alexia frowned, her other hand reaching out to wrap around your abdomen and pull you back as you stepped away. Her long arms wrapped around you, and she pressed her face into your bare back. You smiled to yourself, untangling yourself from her grip and laughing just slightly at the huff of annoyance she let out. When Alexia finally allowed herself to feel, to be clingy, it was like all the attention she didn't let herself ask for caught up to her, and she acted like she wanted to climb into your skin with you.
“I need to change, love. Just give me a second.”
You didn’t look back as you entered the closet, pulling on the nearest shirt and shorts that just happened to belong to Alexia, before you returned to the bedroom, fighting a grin at the sight of Alexia laying in bed, the covers pulled up to her chin. Her arms were distinctly crossed over her chest, and there was a slight pout on her face.
You slid into the bed next to her, laughing lightly at the way she eagerly pulled you into her, wrapping all four of her limbs around your smaller body and sighing in relief. You were expecting her to talk, honestly, thinking that she was upset enough that she’d be ready to have a conversation. Instead, though, as her breath tickled your neck, she asked a quiet question.
“Amor, can I go to sleep?” You knew she wasn’t really asking permission to sleep, she was asking you to stay, in the least vulnerable way possible.
“Of course you can, amor. We have the day off tomorrow. Sleep for as long as you need to. I’ll be right here.” You replied, smoothing some hair out of her face as her eyes fluttered shut. She forced them back open, though, eyes flickering from yours down to your nose.
“Wake me up if you are hurting? Please?” She asked, and you nodded, though you had no intention of doing so. Alexia hadn’t slept well in… you didn’t even know how long. This was the perfect opportunity to give herself a break, and you weren’t about to take that away from her, no matter how badly your nose hurt.
Alexia knew you too well, though, shaking her head with a frown as she settled her head back down on your chest, unable to resist the comfort that listening to your heartbeat brought her.
“You are lying.” She mumbled, somehow seeming already half asleep. Her head moved with your chest as you laughed silently, and as she smiled a bit, too.
“I am lying. I’ll wake you up if I need you, though, okay? I promise.”
“You better.” Alexia grumbled.
“Go to sleep.” You instructed, feeling her fully relax into you. It was barely 8pm, yet you were exhausted, and you fell into an easy sleep soon after Alexia.
-------
“Mi amor, wake up.” Alexia whispered, giving your shoulder a gentle shake. You grunted, opening your eyes. Well, you tried to open them. Your left eye was rather… swelled shut, and the right was only a bit better off. You could just barely make out Alexia’s face hovering over yours, worry contorting her features. Your head was pounding, and you gave up all hope of treating Alexia to a self care day today. You weren’t sure you’d be able to get out of bed. “I am sorry to wake you, bebé, but it is 11am, and your nose does not look too good.”
You weren’t very happy with being woken up, now very aware of the pain radiating from your nose, and all you could think was to make it stop. “Ice, please,” you murmured, feeling a gentle kiss pressed to your cheek, before Alexia’s weight was gone from next to you.
You didn’t open your eyes when she returned, just held your hand out for the ice pack.
“I can put-”
“Let me, please.” You insisted, knowing that no matter how gently it was pressed to your face, it was going to hurt, and you really didn't want to flinch away from Alexia’s touch right now.
Alexia handed you the ice pack, and you gently pressed it to your nose, letting out a sharp hiss of pain. Your girlfriend’s hand grabbed your free one, and you squeezed tight.
“Ow ow ow,” you cried through gritted teeth. A few tears escaped from your swollen eyes, and you fought back a sob yourself, now, feeling completely wretched.
“Shh, estas bien, estas bien,” Alexia cooed, feeling completely helpless. “I am so sorry, mi amor, so so sorry.”
“Hold me?” You asked quietly, ignoring her apology completely.
“Anything, cariño, anything you want,” she promised, gently pulling you into her arms. The pain began to numb eventually, but your tears didn’t stop. You were so incredibly frustrated with yourself. You were supposed to be taking care of Alexia, letting her need you, and instead, you were crying because of a broken nose, making her feel even worse.
“I’m sorry,” You mumbled into her shirt, your cheek pressed to her chest. You liked it better, cuddling like this. You liked it when she held you, her large hands splayed across your back, her chin resting on the top of your head.
“Why are you sorry?” She asked.
“You’re upset, and you need me, and I’m crying and-”
“Stop, amor, do not be sorry. You always tell me to feel what I need to feel. You need to do that too, sí? You are in pain, you can cry, you can always cry. You never have to be sorry for hurting, and you never have to be sorry for needing me.” Alexia insisted, running her fingers through your hair, being very conscious of not letting anything come into contact with your nose.
“You need me, too.” You said miserably.
“I do.” Alexia admitted. “But I have you, right here, in my arms. I feel better already, mi amor, I really do. I am okay, I just want you to be okay. Let me take care of you. You can have a turn later, when you can open your eyes.”
You choked out a laugh, wincing when it caused pain to shoot across your face. “Don’t make me laugh,” you groaned.
“Well I should go then, amor. I cannot just turn it off.” Alexia said seriously, beginning to slide out from under you.
“Don’t you dare.” You warned, your hand tightening its grip on her shirt. Alexia smiled to herself, readjusting you against her.
“Te tengo, mi vida, te tengo.” She whispered into your hair. You sighed happily, the pain in your face lessened, somehow, by the affection the blonde was showing you.
“Talk to me.” You asked after a minute, tangling your leg with hers under the covers. Your nose might be shattered, and you might be almost concussed, but you weren’t giving up on getting Alexia to lean on you.
“About what?” Alexia whispered back, not stopping her fingers softly running through your hair.
“How are you doing?”
Your girlfriend was silent for a few moments, seemingly thinking through her answer. She was more honest when she did respond than you expected. “I am okay. I mean, it has been a rough few months. I was not really okay yesterday, but I am now.”
“Ale, you don’t need to be okay just because I’m not either,” you started, but Alexia cut you off with a shake of her head.
“No, I am not lying. I am okay. I feel better. Seeing you hurt… it puts things into perspective. All that matters, really, is that you are okay, and you are with me. Everything else is… not important. Not if I have you.”
You weren’t really used to Alexia making big statements like this. It wasn’t that she didn’t express her love for you, because she did. It was just… she normally did it with actions, rather than words. This was a welcome surprise, though, and you felt your already swollen eyes welling with tears.
“You’ll always have me.” You promised, forcing one eyelid open to gaze up at her. You knew you probably looked atrocious at the moment, all swollen and bruised, but Alexia still looked at you like she always did; like you were the best thing she’d seen that day, the best thing she ever would see.
“Even if I break your nose again?” she joked, but her voice was a little choked up.
“Even then.” You promised, puckering your lips for a kiss. Alexia leaned in, so delicately, barely brushing her lips with yours.
“Te amo, más que a todo,” she whispered, her thumb rubbing a light circle over your cheek. You shivered a little at the contact, whispering the words back. You could see in her eyes, even with your rather challenged vision, that she meant it.
-----
i've had this in the drafts for actual months
i feel like i say this with half the fics i post but i really... hate this one. which is why she's been hidden away for such a long time but i finally finished the ending and i just thought i'd post and delete it later if i hate it still :)
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How You Get The Girl
Alexia putellas x fem!reader
(Featuring Alexia in denial and Mapi’s devil antics)
This was not how Alexia was expecting her weekend to go.
She was supposed to be having a weekend trip to Mallorca with her closest long-time friend, Jenni. As much as it pained Alexia to leave her 4 legged companion behind, she knew she would also have an even harder time leaving her at a hotel when her and Jenni went to some bars, as Jenni said ‘to find someone to spice up her life a bit’.
Mapi was definitely not her first choice on who to leave Nala with, however with most of the team using their break to travel back to their families, it left only Mapi and Ingrid to look after her Pomeranian.
However, after receiving a frantic phone call from Mapi, with the few words she managed to make out due to the defender’s worry laced voice being: Nala, Cake, Vets.
———————————————————————
Alexia rushed onto the next flight and was at the vets in around 2 hours, to find Mapi still in the waiting room clutching her beloved dog, and Alexia was quick to snatch Nala from her.
It took everything in Alexia’s power to not start cursing Mapi out for her carelessness, but as she gave in and threw a snide remark at the defender, it was interupted by the receptionist.
“Nala is ready to be seen”
Alexia rushed to the door with Nala in her arms, and Mapi trailing behind. They were shown into the room, and Alexia walked straight into someone quite a bit shorter than her, this combined with the fact she is a professional footballer who keeps on top of her strength training resulted in her basically knocking this person over.
“¡Lo siento, lo siento!”, She said whilst keeping her eyes on Nala to check she wasnt hurt even more by her collision.
As Alexia looked up at the person she had crashed into, she was met with arguably the most beautiful women she had ever seen. Only to be met with a shove from her best friend, was when Alexia realised she had been staring.
“Alexia stop ogling the poor woman and apologise”
“I did!” countered the midfielder.
“Maybe in English would be smarter? So that she actually understands you!”
At the realisation that you had absolutely no idea what ‘lo siento’ meant, Alexia’s cheeks flushed crimson red, which recieved one of Mapi’s infamous snorts of laughter behind her.
Alexia honestly had no idea what was happening to her. She knows that your pretty, but she had seen other pretty girls before, why did you make her feel like this?
“Hello, I will be Nala’s vet for today, i will just go grab her records from reception, wont be a minute!” you said with a soft smile.
As soon as the door clicked shut behind you, Mapi burst iut laughing.
“Ale, as much as i love you, you were embarrassing there! If this is how you act around girls, no wonder you have never had a serious relationship”
“Shut up! I am not attracted to her, she makes me feel like i want to throw up!”
“Honey, thats called butterflies in your stomach! pretty cliché if you ask me, but I didnt realise you were such a romantic!” Mapi retorted, still laughing.
“I’m not a romantic. I’m not into her. I just want her to treat my dog, and then i can go play football after”
“Wait until i tell the team about this! The scary la reina, reduced to a blushing mess by a cute vet who she body slammed and then spent a minute ogling her, all because she has a little crush”
Before Alexia could respond with a threat of using her captain title to punish Mapi with tunning laps, the door clicked open to reveal you rushing back in.
Nala, who usually was very timid and barked at anyone who got near her, immediately jumped off of Alexia’s lap and ran straight up to you and jumped at your legs, to which you responded by picking her up and gushing over the cute little ball of fluff.
Alexia knew that if she wasnt already sat down her knees would have buckled at the sight of her dog basically confirming the fact that you were perfect for her. As Alexia contined to daydream about you, she was interupted by a hand clicking in her face, to which she turned to glare at Mapi’s toothy grin.
“Te distrajiste, el lindo vert estaba tratando de preguntarte sobre Nala. (You zoned out, the cute vet was trying to ask you about Nala)” Mapi said with a knowing smirk.
“¡Callarse la boca! y deja de llamarla linda. (Shut up! and stop calling her cute”
“¿Celosa? (jealous?)”
“Nunca. (never)”
However, when the two spaniards turned to face you, they were met by your dumbfounded face trying to decipher a word of what they just said. Although you had been taking Spanish classes since you moved to Spain, both Alexia and Mapi spoke the languge with too heavy of an accent and too fast for you to understand.
“So you filled out your form saying Nala ate a full chocolate cake?” You asked.
“¡Si! Yes! Will she be okay?” Alexia responded worriedly.
“Honestly this happens a lot, and there is no point her having ang unnecessary procedures, so we usually reccomend her take these tablets twice a day for a week and if you notice any unusual behaviour, bring her back here. I will write you a prescription for it now!”
“Ah okay thankyou, do I scedule an appointment for after she finishes the pills for a checkup?”
“No, the pills are enough, no checkup” You say with a smile.
As Alexia now realised that she would probably not see you again for a while, she slumped back in her seat and a new frown sat predominantly on her face.
Upon Mapi seeing this, she immediately felt an impulsive urge to assist one of her closest friends in her crush dilemma situation.
So Mapi did what she did best.
“My friend thinks your hot and wants your number now”
At hearing this you blushed bright red and Alexia smacked Mapi round the head.
“Excuse my friend! She can be very blunt… and stupid” Alexia said as Mapi emits an offended gasp, “As I would have politely asked you at the end, could I please have your number, as I think your very beautiful”
You are still sat there in absolute shock, you knew who these two people were, Alexia Putellas and Mapi Leon. Two world famous Spanish and Barcelona football players, you couldn’t help but wonder what the two time balon d’or winner wanted with your number.
Unfortunately, Alexia mistook your shock for rejection.
“I’m sorry, I have made it awkward, it’s okay that you dont feel comfortable giving me your number” Alexia suddenly stood up to leave, and pulled Mapi up with her “Thankyou for your help, goodbye”
The spaniard quickly took the prescription from your desk and rushed out with Nala in her arms, and urging Mapi to follow her, who felt slightly bad for embarrassing her friend like that.
———————————————————————
Alexia quicky rushed back down the corridor to the receptionist desk, wanting to get Nala’s prescription, and get out of the stupid vets as soon as possible, probably as she knew to return to her house and cry at the embarrassment she had suffered today.
The midfielder was about to hand over the prescription to the receptionist, but Mapi’s eyes caught a glimpse of something on the back of the paper.
“Alexia stop!”
Alexia turned to glare at the defender, “What now?” She said followed by an exasperated sigh.
“The paper!”
At this, Alexia turned over the paper, and couldn’t stop the smile tugging at her lips, as there was your number hastily scribbled down with a note: -call me
As she noted down the number into her contacts, she realised, she hadn’t even asked for your name.
Alexia turned to the receptionist, and asked, “Who was the vet that just saw us?”
“Y/n, she’s sweet, just moved here from London recently!”
“Thankyou” Alexia replied, as the receptionist grabbed the pills, Alexia put down your name into her contacts and sent you a quick message.
- Hey! It’s Alexia, from the clinic, I wasn’t lying when i told you i thought you were beautiful and I would love to take you on a date sometime?
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down for the count || barcelona x teen!reader ||
you take a bad hit during a game.
some things weren't meant to be joked about. you knew that you could be a bit dramatic, often treating little things like they were big deals. you weren't sure when it had become funny to you to see the look of concern on your teammates' faces whenever you'd go down for a few seconds too long before they realized that you were fine. you knew that it wasn't really funny, but you liked having the knowledge that someone genuinely cared for you.
el classico matches were big deals, and jonatan made you promise to be on your best behavior if you wanted to start. mapi was out on injury, so she wouldn't be there to spur you on towards trouble. everybody seemed to understand the impact of this particular match, it was alexia's first el classico since her injury.
"good luck today, la reina." your tone was cheery and playful, usually something the girls knew meant trouble. however, you genuinely were trying to be on your best behavior. none of them mentioned it, but you could feel them watching you closely throughout the warm ups.
the game iself wasn't what you had expected. you had played in big matches before, where tensions were high and players tended to be a bit aggressive. several girls had nearly trucked through you, and the refs didn't seem to be paying much attention of any of it. you were getting frustrated, and the playfulness from before faded away. the girls were still watching you, but they weren't paying enough attention to notice the switch.
you took a shot that was knocked out of bounds by the keeper, resulting in a corner. you thought your position was good, near the goal, but a bit further away from defenders and misa. she had been putting in the work to block your shots, even going as far as complimenting you on your progress during half-time.
"it's up!" you shouted as you jumped up to head the ball in. you felt something collide with your stomach, knocking you backwards before you could hit the ball. your body was shot back a few feet. alexia had always nagged you about your positioning during corners, claiming that it tended to be in dangerous spots. as you flew backwards towards the goal post, you realized just what she meant.
your head hit the post with a sickening crack. it wasn't a thud, and you didn't move an inch. misa immediately moved to crouch down next to you. she didn't know what to do, but anger filled her as she realized that none of your teammates were coming over to check on you. they all assumed that you were faking it. it wasn't until you hadn't moved for a couple of minutes that any of them sprung into action.
ingrid was the first one by your side. she knelt down next to you and gently moved your head to see where it hit. a wave of nausea washed over her as she saw the blood dripping out from the back of your head. if it wasn't for the small, shallow breaths, ingrid would have thought you were dead.
"pequena, come on, wake up," ingrid pleaded with you. alexia was the next one by your side. it took every ounce of her strength not to just break down as she looked at you. "she's not moving alexia. i don't know what to do."
"we have to let them take her. she'll probably wake up at the hospital," alexia said. it was more for herself than ingrid. she didn't want to finish the game anymore. alexia didn't want to do anything until she knew that you were alright. there wasn't a player on the field who wasn't in some form of distress over what they saw happen to you. for a moment, the whole world seemed to care about you, but you weren't awake to see it.
…
it took nearly two days for you to stablize, and even longer for you to wake up. your parents had stopped by, but only briefly. they had been back in barcelona on business when the game was going on. it was a lucky break that they had been able to show up, despite the fact that you were their only child.
alexia was sickened by the way they dismissed you, even as you laid there in a coma. she may have been the most strict with you and always at her wit's end with your pranks, but alexia loved you. she wanted to protect you, and seeing you in the hospital bed killed her. still, she didn't let herself break down in fear that you'd wake up to see her like that.
"it's been nearly a week," lucy said as she glanced at your bed. "have they said anything?"
"the swelling in her brain is still going down. they've only just been able to go in and repair the damage to her skull. we're all lucky that she didn't hit her head in any other spot or she'd be dead," alexia said. she was just repeating what the doctor had rattled off in rapid spanish back to her english teammate. you had always been fond of lucy, and so lucy decided that she'd stay in your hospital room with you.
"she'll make it out of this, alexia. (y/n), she's a tough little brat," lucy said. alexia needed the reassurance almost as much as she needed you to wake up.
"thank you." alexia reached out to hold lucy's hand. it was as she started to pull hers out of yours that she felt movement. you tried to squeeze her hand and pull it back towards you as you stirred in your sleep. alexia didn't want to get too excited, but lucy shot straight up from her seat.
"(y/n), are you awake?" you heard lucy's voice, but it sounded muffled and a bit echoed. alexia leaned closer towards you as your eyes fluttered open. you let out a small groan at all of the bright lights and your body's sudden discomfort. your head hurt in a way that sent waves of pain all over your body.
"ale, i hurt," you whined. alexia had tried so hard to keep herself composed, and for the most part, it had worked. however, the moment that you looked at her with pain and confusion in your eyes, the dam broke. alexia's head shot down to rest against the side of your bed, but you could tell from the way that her body shook that she was crying. "ale?"
"it's okay, (y/n), she needs this. i'll be right back, okay? i have to get the doctors and call the team," lucy said. you nodded, obviously not going anywhere. lucy was back fairly quickly, and alexia was rushed outside as the doctors caught you up on what happened and ran a few tests. by the time that they were finished, the majority of the team had arrived and were all packed into your room.
"i am glad that you're okay," alexia said as she took your hand in hers. it had taken a couple of hours for the team to stop doting on you, but now things felt normal again. you felt like you were in the locker room, with the exception of alexia, who hadn't left your side. "you scared us all back there… including me. especially me, actually. i'm so sorry that i wasn't there sooner, i don't know what i would have done if you'd…"
"i'm fine, alexia, so you don't have to think like that. mapi's taking me back with her because my parents just left for america and won't be back for another six months. ingrid will be practically begging you for help supervising us," you said with a smile. alexia cracked a small one as well. she was a little fuzzy on the details of your relation to mapi, as was everybody, but the woman had always treated you like her little sister. all anybody needed to know was that you were her family, and all you needed to know was that mapi would always be there for you.
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How do we put up with you?
Barcelona Femeni x Teen Reader
Words: 1,936
A/N: there’s a lot of Mapi and reader beef in this one😭
You hated traveling but also loved it. It was a perfect opportunity to do dumb things and easily get away with it since everyone was too tired to care. The bad thing about it was you had to sit down and be patient.
The whole time in the airport, Alexia would hold your hand, or Sandra, since you liked how soft her hands were.
"Restroom," Alexia told you as she reached to grab your hand. "I don't have to go," you told her, only paying attention to your phone. "Hey!" You said as she snatched it from you. "You always say you don't have to, then when I come back you complain that you do, come on," you glared at her as you stood up and took her hand.
"Aw, the baby needs her mommy to take her to the potty," Salma cooed as she pinched your cheek. You swatted her hand away. "Leave her alone," Alexia told her, which Salma was quick to oblige.
—————
Once Alexia went into one of the stalls, you were quick to rush out. You went to a gift shop that was nearby to look at what they had.
After a couple of minutes, you noticed Alexia rushing out the restroom and in the direction of the team. You smirked, shaking your head, and continued to look stuffed animals.
"You really want to give her a heart attack, don't you?" You jumped at the sound of Ingrid's voice. You turned around and smiled at Fridolina and Ingrid. "Look at this puppy," you held out the puppy that Frido took.
"Grab a candy and let's go," Ingrid told you, and you were quick to grab your favorite candy and gave it to Frido.
Ingrid held your hand as you walked back. You smirked at seeing Alexia go off on Patri and Pina.
"I think you lost someone," Frido announced, making everyone turn to her. "You see, we told you we didn't know," Pina told her, glaring at you. As usual, Alexia suspected that they had a part in your disappearance and got scolded for no reason.
Alexia quickly swept you up in a hug. "You know you can't do that, idiota," she scolded, smacking the back of your head. "Look at my new stuffed animal." You held it up for everyone to see.
Pina snatched it away and examined it. "Can I name it?" She genuinely asked. You thought about it for a second. "Not your child, not your choice." Claudia scoffed and went to get her own stuffed animal to name.
————
You were bored and energetic; the candy Fridolina got you gave you an extra boost. Alexia sighed as you saw you eating it, too tired to even take it away from you. She wanted you to be tired so you would sleep the whole plane ride.
"Come on, we have to board," Alexia said, grabbing your hand. Marta took your suitcase, and you happily made your way onto the plane.
"Can I sit with Ingrid and Mapi?" You asked her, looking at the couple. Mapi groaned upon hearing you, making Ingrid smack her in the back of the head.
"Okay, here's your bag; it has your juice, iPad, and snacks." Alexia spoke a little too excited, it was understandable; she needed a break from your nonsense. "Move, I want middle," you told Mapi, who shook her head.
"Mapi move," Ingrid now said. Mapi gave her a look of disbelief. "Mapi, don't start arguing with a kid." Mapi sighed and got up. You smiled and sat in between them. Lucy looked back at you and gave you a warning look when you kicked her seat again before the plane even took off. It was going to be a long flight.
————
You were bored again after 10 minutes. After kicking Lucy's seat none stop you finally got scolded by Mapi, and she threatened to tell Alexia.
Speaking of, Mapi kept staring Ingrid down when she thought you were distracted by your iPad. It was disgusting, in your opinion. She was practically drooling all over her shirt.
"Can you stop eye-fucking her" you told her when Ingrid went to use the restroom. Mapi looked at you, shocked, not believing those words had just came out of your mouth.
You smirked at her. "I'm telling Alexia" she announced, standing up to call Alexia to make you sit with her.
"You do that; I'll tell her it was you that broke her favorite vase, not me. All because a teenager was kicking your ass in a game," you knew you got her there when she went silent.
You were beating Mapi in FIFA, and it was worse since she was trying to impress Ingrid, who was watching the whole time. You were teasing her, and she decided it was a good idea to throw Nala's toy ball at the wall; it hit the vase instead. You had never seen Mapi so scared.
You took the blame since you knew it would be good blackmail later on.
Mapi kept glancing at you and back to her phone, not even looking at Ingrid's direction anymore, even when the green eyed girl asked her something, she counted down the minutes until the plane landed. She needed a break from any kind of children.
You had another trick up your sleeve, though. You knew with Mapi's looks that things would most likely heat up tonight in their hotel room.
You turned to Ingrid and tapped her shoulder. "Can me, you, and Frido have a sleepover? Like last time. Alexia can never sleep on the first night, and it annoys me." Mapi turned to you, wondering if she heard you correctly.
"I don't think that's a good idea," she said. "Why not? I'm fine with it; I've missed her late-night thoughts." Ingrid shrugged, and you stuck your tongue out at Mapi, who muttered curse words under her breath.
"Watch your language," you scolded her, immediately cuddling into Ingrid's side. All she could do was stare you down, despite the growing temptation to strangle you.
————
Thankfully for Mapi, she got a 30-minute break after landing and getting to the hotel. During those 30 minutes, you had to somehow convince Alexia to let you have a sleepover with Ingrid and Fridolina, then explain to her that Mapi was staying with her. It wasn't going to be easy.
"Did you take my sweater again?" Alexia asked you as she stepped out of the restroom from her shower. When she saw you, she frowned. You had your little backpack ready to go. "Where are you going? It's 9, your bedtime is at 10."
"Me, Ingrid, and Frido are having a girls night," you told her happily. "You're barely telling me this?" She sounded a bit angry, but mostly confused.
"Ingrid said it was fine, and you're stuck with Mapi for tonight," Alexia huffed at that. Those two together didn't make a good combo when it came to sleeping in the same room.
Alexia sometimes had a hard time falling asleep in a new environment, so she was constantly getting up. Mapi couldn't sleep if she heard any kind of noise, so she would get annoyed by any movement.
————
"You have a toothbrush?" You nodded. "Charger?" You nodded. "Extra clothes?" You nodded. Before she could question you more, you walked out the door.
"Bye Lex!" You called out, running to the elevator. Ingrid and Mapi's room was on the floor below. You didn't even have to knock on the door since an angry-looking Mapi came out with a bag of clothes and her blankets.
"Bye bye," you smirked at her, going past her and pushing her outside. "Eres un-" Before she could finish, you slammed the door in her face.
You ran to Ingrid and jumped on her bed. "Can we please ding dong ditch some of the girls" Ingrid shook her head, making you whine.
"Behave tonight, or I'll send you back to Alexia's." You nodded and jumped up, hearing another knock on the door.
"Frido!" You exclaimed, jumping on her, when you opened the door. She carried you back inside and threw you on the bed.
"Want to do a job, kid?" Frido asked you, and you quickly nodded. "Go get us some ice; you know where it's at?"
"Frido, it's too late for her to be going out." "She'll be fine; she has too much energy; she needs to do some exercise to get rid of it, so why don't you sprint while doing this, I'll time you." You loved competitions.
————
"Go!" Frido yelled, holding the door open for you as you sprinted out of the room and down to the elevator.
You went to the floor below, where the ice was, and sprinted out of the elevator.
While you filled your bucket, you got an idea. You could fulfill your ding-dong ditching plan. As always, Patri was your target.
You knew Patri and Ona got put together because last time Patri and Pina shared a room, Pina broke the TV trying to throw a football at you for being annoying. You admit, you were being annoying, but throwing a ball at you while you were standing in front of the TV was a bad idea on her part.
————
You quickly banged on there and ran away to the elevator again. After a couple of seconds, you heard the door opening. "Hello?" Patri asked, you couldn't contain your laughter.
"Y/N, I swear," she said, knowing your laugh. She sighed and went back inside, refusing to give you attention. Not enjoying that fact, you decided to do it again.
It was a terrible idea; Patri was waiting for you. She quickly swung the door open and tackled you.
"Alexia!" You yelled, knowing she was probably up and doing her nighttime routine. Patri continued her attack and started tickling your sides. "Helppp!" You yelled, giggling.
Ona came out of the room confused, rubbing her eyes tiredly and watching Patri attack you while you giggled and yelled for Alexia.
————
When Alexia stepped out, the waterworks came. "Mierda," Patri muttered, seeing the tears in your eyes.
"What is going on?!" Alexia shouted. It was late; practically the whole team on the bottom floor was up and out of their rooms now. They were all pretty cranky over the fact that they were woken up.
"I just wanted ice," you cried, pointing to your bucket of ice that was on the ground. Alexia looked at Patri with a questioning look.
"She's a demon! She ding dong ditched us," Patri defended herself. Irene let out an annoyed sigh and told everyone to go back into their rooms.
"Ona?" You turned to Ona, who was just as confused as her. "I didn't hear anything," she shrugged and went back into the room to sleep. Patri had a look of disbelief, finally getting off of you.
"But-" "That's enough, Patri; apologize and give her a new bucket of ice, and you," she turned to you. Mapi quickly stuck her head out the door to watch you get your scolding next.
"Bed, it's way past your bedtime," you rolled your eyes. "I'm practically an adult." "Don't act like it," you glared at Mapi. “Okay, I’ll go to bed, cuddle with Ingrid, and have her read me a bedtime story, something you can’t do.” Before Mapi could say something back, Alexia dragged her back into the room and slammed the door.
————
Patri shoved your new bucket of ice into your hands and stormed off. "Goodnight," you called out; all you got was a middle finger.
"Alexia!"
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Penalty
Barcelona Femení + Misa Rodríguez x Hardersson!Reader
Natalia Guijarro (OC) x Hardersson!Reader
Part of The Big Adventures Universe
Summary: Someone's ego is bruised
She was hot and sweaty but above all, Misa was tired.
She’d even go as far as saying she was exhausted.
“Ale!” She complains as another ball goes rocketing past her to the back of the net,” Come on! We’ve been at this for hours!”
On the edge of the pitch, lay both Paños and Cata. They’d been Alexia’s first two victims, having been there since before Misa arrived.
“I’m just warming up,” Alexia replies, jogging on the spot before kicking another ball past Misa’s body,” I’m practicing.”
“For what?” Paños asks,” You’ve not told us anything. Are you doing another charity match? Because this is extreme.”
“No, but that’s a good idea,” Alexia says thoughtfully before letting loose another rocket that streaks past Misa’s outstretched arms.
“She’s finally gone crazy,” Cata groans,” I told you this would happen. She’s gone crazy and now we’re all suffering.”
“Again,” Alexia orders as Misa rolls the balls back to her,” We’ve still got a little bit of time before-“
“How long have you guys been here?” Patri appears out of nowhere, strolling onto the pitch with a group of people trailing behind her,” God, you’ve killed Cata.”
“Okay,” Misa snaps,” What the hell is going on?! I thought retirement was the opportunity for us to relax. Ale’s gone absolutely batshit!”
Patri grins, all crooked and mischievous. “Her ego’s bruised. The new Barca keeper hasn’t let any penalties in ever. Alexia thought she’d be the exception.”
Misa racks her brain for who the new Barcelona keeper is, thinking for a few moments before,” Oh, Eriksson and Harder’s daughter, right?” She laughs. “Wounded your pride, did she, Ale? It’s okay. You’re not in your prime anymore-“
“I’m just out of practice,” Alexia says to Misa before turning to Patri,” How did you find out? Did you blab to everyone?”
A group of the old Barcelona team have invaded the pitch. Pina, Marta and Caro have all set up a picnic blanket as Paredes and her wife hand out juice boxes and to-go sandwiches. Jana and Bruna are squirting each other with water as Mapi and Ingrid roll their eyes.
Vicky and Salma have arrived too, talking to each other as Ona and Aitana come strolling closer.
Behind them, comes Patri’s cousin and you.
You’re talking softly to her, heads bowed as you speak whilst carrying a bag.
You’re dressed casually in just some tracksuit bottoms and a t-shirt. Your jacket is flung over your shoulders and Natalia fiddles with the collar.
You’re much taller than you were the first time Misa met you. You’re taller than her definitely, taller than Alexia too. Misa’s eyes cut to Ingrid and she wonders briefly if all Scandis are tall or if you and Ingrid are just outliers.
“Morning,” You chirp, digging through your bag for your gloves.
“Ten euros on Alexia getting one in,” Jana says and Misa watches as Talia rolls her eyes.
“Don’t be stupid. Alexia’s getting nothing past her. Mi vida is the greatest keeper in the world. She doesn’t let me score against her without a fight. There’s no way Alexia can do something I can’t.”
Patri laughs, ruffling her cousin’s hair. “You think you’re better than la reina? You’re cute, Nat.”
Natalia huffs, darting away so she can smooth her hair down. “She’s not getting anything past her.”
“I’ll put five on y/n playing with her,” Ingrid pipes up,” Look at her, she’s already not taking this seriously. She’s teasing Ale.”
You’re grinning, swinging your arms easily before dropping down to tie laces that were already tied.
Alexia paces in front of the penalty spot like a lion.
Back and forth.
Back and forth.
You take your time, inspecting the goalposts before whistling sharply. Without even looking, Talia chucks you your drink and you catch it one-handed. You take a long drink and Aitana giggles as you carelessly throw it behind you.
You clap your gloved hands twice before finally taking your position.
Alexia tries to catch you off guard. She doesn’t run up, she just kicks.
You leap up on one leg and pluck it from the air.
She tries to put the next into the left bottom corner but you’re already diving in that direction before the ball has fully left her foot.
“See!” Natalia swoons to everyone who will listen,” My girlfriend is the best in the world.”
Alexia’s penalties get more aggressive as time goes on but you collect them all without little fanfare.
Her last kick had you winking as you roll the ball back to her and Misa had to smother her life when Alexia’s jaw clenches.
“Give up, Ale!” Mapi yells from the sidelines,” Save what little dignity you have left!”
Ingrid smacks her on the shoulder but offers up her own teasing. “She’s already got a list of veterans she’s beaten in penalties! Don’t make her add you too!”
“She has a list?” Misa asks and Ingrid nods.
“It’s a long list,” Ingrid giggles,” She’s been collecting us like Pokémon. I think Chloe Kelly got put on the list last week. Sixty-nine mile per hour shot, y/n collected it like it was nothing.”
“Kid’s got skill,” Paños says, whistling lowly,” Did you see that goal in the World Cup last summer? She’s got flare too.”
“It was so cool!” Talia says excitedly, practically barging her way into the conversation,” The shocked face after it was so cute.”
Natalia waxes poetic about you for the next half an hour as Alexia overloads you with penalties.
None of them go past you.
“You’re so gross,” Patri complains as Talia finally finishes her latest you-centric lecture,” Can you go be in love somewhere else?”
“Nat!” Paredes calls out,” Come and grab a drink, please! It’s very hot today.”
Misa agrees It’s is very hot and she can’t believe a Scandi like you is easily keeping up with Alexia in such heat.
Aitana calls out to you in Catalan and you turn your head to respond, perfect Catalan flowing from your mouth as you reply.
While you’re distracted, Alexia strikes.
She kicks the ball hard. It’s going in the opposite direction to where you’re looking but you still move, like you’ve seen her kick out of the corner of your eye.
You intercept the ball with your chest, letting it fall to your knee and then your foot, where you boot it straight back to Alexia, who has to duck or face a ball to the stomach.
“Sorry!” You call out to her, face suddenly goes bright red when you realise how automatically you reacted.
Alexia sighs and just lays backwards on the ground in defeat.
“Another one for the list then,” Mapi laughs as you make your way over.
You sit by Aitana, who offers you a drink that you take gratefully.
“Hey,” Misa says, sticking her hand out to you,” I’m Misa.”
You shake it. “I know. We met at the world cup when I was little.”
“That was a while ago. It’s nice to see you again.”
“You too.”
She sits on your other side. “So, no penalties whatsoever?”
“None,” You reply,” It’s my special skill.”
“How?”
“She’s super smart,” Natalia says as she appears. She drapes herself over your back and props her chin up on your shoulder. “So smart. She has a degree from Cambridge.”
Your cheeks go red. “You don’t need to keep telling people that.”
“A degree from Cambridge!” Talia doesn’t pay any attention to what you’ve just said. “And she speaks so many languages! She’s working on her Basque right now!”
“Talia,” You complain,” She didn’t ask.”
“But she should know,” Talia insists,” Maybe if you bragged more then I wouldn’t have to do it for you.”
“I’m not that smart.”
Aitana scoffs. “You picked up Ancient Greek in a few months,” She says,” I think we should all be thankful you decided to do football and not take over the world instead.”
You laugh. “I’m happy I stuck with football too.”
The air is filled with ease even as Alexia crawls out of her defeat and joins you all on the picnic blanket. It’s the first time you’ve really hung out with the old Barcelona team. You know a few of them through the coaching staff, a few more through Talia but having them all together makes you feel a little lightheaded.
Cata and Paños in particular seem in awe of your skills and you used to admire those two nearly as much as Zećira. It’s all a bit surreal.
Alexia ends up next to you.
“If I was in my prime,” She says,” I would have scored past you.” She’s being deadly serious and it shocks a laugh out of you.
“Do you really think so?”
Her face betrays her true feelings even as she nods.
“We should get Jenni to try a few against her!” Jana insists.
“I’ll text her,” Marta says,” I think I saw somewhere she’s in the city. Maybe we can get her here now.”
Alexia doesn’t bother answering them. She looks at you, really looks at you. She’s scrutinising you.
Her eyes are narrowed as she stares before her features soften and she bumps her shoulder with yours. “One day,” She says,” I’m going to give you your Ballon d'Or.”
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A Lesson in Accepting
Barcelona Femení x reader
-> Despite reader's best efforts to hide her illness and join in training, a she learns the importance of listening to her body and her teammates
-> Wordcount: ≈ 1.770
-> The happiest birthday to @sleekswosobession - love you!
➳ Masterlist
•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•
"Oye! No chiqui - off!”
Hmmpf.
Out of all the older players, Lucy was usually the fun one. But today she didn’t want you climbing on her and she had gotten annoyed when you tried to steal her shoes. Maybe a new victim was needed for your shenanigans. But who?
Just as you started to look around for Vicky, the arm of Marta found its way onto your shoulder, Caroline now at the other side as they dragged you into the changing rooms. “Don’t even think about it.”
Music blasted through the room, with Salma by the speakers as her phone was connected to it, getting ready while swaying to her music. A quick look around made it obvious that your cubby for the day was between Frido and Ingrid.
Great.
You missed the days were you were at your rightful place between Patri and Cata, Claudia joining you after quickly changing into her kit. Those were the fun days when you had just joined the team. Fresh from Australia and full of energy and nerves Patri and Claudia had taken you under their wing.
Just two weeks later Alexia fell over her tied-together laces, just to see you laughing in a corner, hiding behind your new friends. The room had fallen quiet, everyone scared of what their captain would do.
Laugh.
Alexia Putellas, their strong and serious captain, started laughing at being tricked by a sixteen-year-old Australian rookie. Hesitantly the other players started to laugh, watching the blonde from the corner of their eyes, just to make sure that she wouldn’t get pissy at them laughing.
But now you were stuck between different adults every week, your number never hanging in the same spot, and for today's game, it was the space between two tall scandis. While they were incredibly nice, neither of them had a fable for letting you run wild - but they let you yap as much as you want.
A win is a win. And at this point, you’d take anything.
Rainy games were your favorite games. You loved sliding around on the drenched pitch, tackling an opponent whenever you could, and getting your kit as dirty as possible. And that game was no different.
Sliding here - sliding there.
Mapi thought it was hilarious how you sprinted across the waterlogged pitch, stealing the ball of one opponent after the other.
“Chiqui come here and let me dry your hair, you’ll get sick.”
Irene was in mother mode, fussing over you and Vicky, who looked like the two happiest girls on the planet. Both of you had been in the starting eleven, something that didn’t happen as often. But with the weather conditions and the not-as-competitive opponent, Jona caved to your synchronized begging.
“I won’t. Promise!”
And with that, you were off again. Running outside, leaving the changing room early. Jona had been quick with his talk and the girls were just warming up and getting something to eat or massaged. But you run out to play on the field with the girls sitting on the bench.
Bruna and Jana made it a fun game, sending the ball just slightly wide every time, so that you had to be quick, falling over more than once during it.
Alexia just shook her head in amusement when she came back to the pitch, the other girls following in their captain's stride.
“Chiquitita wear a jacket for me please?” The Catalan’s English was great, even if she was too shy to speak it most of the time. Her hands held out a jacket to you, an eyebrow raised in question.
“I’ll be okay, thank you, Ale!”
And you would be okay, at least for the rest of the night - giving it your all on the pitch and giving it your all when you were the entertainment of the following movie night. Mapi had given you one of those cheap Karaoke microphones and with that, you kept narrating the movies much to everyone else's annoyance.
Mapi thought you were hilarious though. And with everyone smiling at you even if they acted annoyed, you kept going all the way until Lucy and Ona dropped you off at the apartment Barcelona gave you.
In the beginning, the Team members had been worried about you living there, all alone at only sixteen. But Vicky had been fine - she was an angel as opposed to the whirlwind of an Australian that had been added to the team with you. You would be at training most days anyway and doing stuff with the girls even on days off, so you’d be fine. Right?
Well usually you would be fine, but waking up with an itchy throat, annoying cough, and a runny nose topped by a fever, was not a funny thing.
Just like that, all your plans with Vicky for the day had been canceled. The two of you wanted to explore the city and then visit the library closest to the Sagrada Familia, but all of that went to waste now as you were trying to get rid of this cold as fast as possible.
But it turns out it wasn’t that easy. A day later you were still sick, your voice so hoarse that it was hard to understand. You had debated calling Jona and letting him know, but then Alexia and Irene would have been right when it came to you getting sick. You just needed to power through. Tomorrow you will be all good again.
After oversleeping you practically raced to the training center for gym day. Well raced as fast as you can with public transport - a mask secure on your face. You looked sick enough that strangers raised a brow at your sweaty forehead.
To your luck the changing rooms were empty, all of the girls were already in the gym, so you could change in peace, trying to take deep breaths as well as you could. Man, you hated having a stuffy nose.
The bright lights and the loud music made you wince when you entered the big space, with everyone on different equipment. You quickly explained to Jona that your bus had been late, and just by his facial expression you could see that he didn’t believe a word out of your mouth.
He knew. Fuck. But he didn’t do or say anything, just going over the plan for today with you.
The other girls tried to get a good look at you, whispering to themselves. This wasn’t the first time you had been late. Sometimes the bus really didn’t come, and sometimes you overslept. But the training staff was never too mad at you - you were a growing girl after all, and needed your sleep.
But usually, when you came in, you would go around greeting the girls one by one, telling them the crazy stories of your bus driver. Today, however, you picked out an empty corner, starting to stretch all by yourself.
When one of the trainers called for partner exercises you were quick to kidnap Vicky, who didn’t even react as she was used to your antics by now. But then she looked at you.
“You’re sick!”
“Shhh!”
With, what you thought, quick reflexes you pushed her head down so that she would lower her voice. “Don’t tell on me! Or I’ll tell Sandra.”
The young Spaniard was caught in an odd situation - realistically she knew she should tell Alexia, or at least someone - but she was terrified of the goalkeeper finding out. With a solemn nod, she gave in.
You didn’t believe her, holding onto her right hand as tightly as you could “No! "Promise me!”
“Fine. I promise. Now get your clammy hands off me please.”
Now it wasn’t just you who ran around like a headless chicken, stumbling over nothing and barely strong enough to lift any weight at all, but also Vicky, who desperately tried to avoid eye contact with someone else, whispering hushed annoyances in your ear.
“They’re weird, no?” Aitana had made her way to Alexia, who was watching the whole thing unfold in front of her. “Very weird..", she nodded.
When a break was called, you hurried off to the bathrooms, while Vicky tried to avoid anything and everyone.
But that didn’t hold on for too long, as she was cornered by Alexia, Irene, Aitana, and Ingrid. The other girls watched from a distance, knowing what was happening.
“I don’t know anything!”
“We didn’t say anything.” Irene was trying really hard not to let an amused smile crack through and instead keep up the intimidating frown.
One eyebrow went up.
Then the other.
“Okay, fine!”
Alexia relaxed her face again, knowing that had been enough for Vicky to spill everything she knew.
“She’s sick.”
“Chiquitita!”
Ingrid didn’t get an answer and started looking around the facilities as quickly as she could while Aitana tried to console a guilt-ridden Vicky, telling her that she had done the right thing, emphasizing how dangerous it was that you were exercising.
They could hear you coughing before they even saw you, as Ingrid dragged you to the gym as gently as she could, nearly just carrying you.
“Ai Chiqui. What are you doing here, you’re sick amor, you need to rest.”
Alexia's soft mothering tone gave you the rest, tears forming in your eyes. “I’m sorry… Just didn’t want to miss out.” Sobs wrecked your tired body as some of your letters got swallowed.
“Shhh, let’s get you home.” Your captain dried tears after tears as she helped you out of the room and into the showers.
Jona looked happy with how everything turned out, he knew that Alexia would take care of it - her heart was soft for the youngsters on the team, no matter how hard she tried to hide it.
On your way out your eyes met Vicky's. “You promised not to tell Vic!”.
“Oye, keep walking, or we’ll call Catley. I’m sure she would love to hear about your situation.” It was Mapi that nudged you, a teasing smile on her face.
Hmmpf.
"Sandra Vicky put shaving cream in your gloves!"
And with that you let your captain drag you out of the room, smiling at the chaos that exploded behind you.
After getting washed up and changed, Ale helped you to her car and started driving to her home, not listening to the whines that you wanted to go to your apartment.
“You can say it now, Ale.”
She could see you were close to falling asleep, head resting on your seatbelt.
“I told you so. Now let’s get you healthy again.”
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Reputation // Alexia Putellas
a/n: based off this request.
Alexia Putellas.
La reina.
Queen of football.
Fan favorite - everybody’s favorite.
It was simple: Alexia doesn’t get rejected.
Or so everyone thought. While in fact, Alexia was asked out often, she was usually the one who would decline the offer. Most of them not interested in her as a person but as the media girl.
Yet that didn‘t stop her from having fun, very fun nights.
Alexia Putellas had a reputation - the fuck girl.
Which is why everybody warned you about her.
"Keep your distance"
"She‘s no good"
"She has a reputation"
"A teammate nothing more"
-
Alexia’s eyes follow you as you entered the gym.
You looked good, the barca gear made you glow.
"Don‘t even think about it" Lucy warned, stepping in front of Alexia. Lucy’s eyes narrowed as she glared at la reina. The midfielder looked confused before a smirk grew on her face, realizing what the defender meant. "I‘m warning you, Alexia. Do not dare" the english growled.
"I‘m not doing anything" she grinned, eyes back on you as she watched you talking to Patri.
Lucy was aware of Alexias bad reputation and she knew that the sunshine you were, it was most likely for Alexia to shoot her shot. But Lucy would be damned if she didn‘t try to stop it.
The defender and you always had a close relationship, you had played together at City and for the lionesses. Lucy had to protect you. There was no bad cell in your body, you were a ray of sunshine - smiley, sweet and positive. She’d never forgive herself if anything happens to you.
-
"Enjoying Barcelona?" a voice asked, a hand touching your back before they sat down. Alexia.
The team was out in a restaurant as they celebrated Fridos birthday.
"It‘s nice here" you answered. The older woman chuckled, "here" handing you a drink.
"Oh, I don‘t dri-" you tried to explain before the midfielder cut you off, "it‘s water" she smiled, scooting closer.
What both of you failed to notice was the glare that Lucy sent Alexia, the way her eyes burnt holes in the captains head. Yet what Lucy failed to notice was the blush that started to cover your cheeks, Alexias gaze wandering over your features. "Tell me about yourself, y/n" she smiled softly, sipping on her own drink.
The night was about to start.
-
"When did you leave last night?" Lucy asked as she walked beside you towards the pitch.
"I don‘t know, actually. I left with Ale" you replied.
Lucy stopped in her tracks, grabbing your wrist, "what did you say?!"
"She drove me home"
"That‘s it?"
"That‘s it" you confirmed.
"Stay away from her, she‘s not the girl you think she is"
Again something you had heard more than once before.
-
"Hey" the Catalonian greeted, pressing a kiss to your cheek. In respond, you blushed furiously, shyly looking to the ground as the girl giggled at your behavior. "You look pretty" she flirted, eyeing you up and down. Something about the way the Barca outfits hugged your body made her heart race, skin tingle and mind spin with thoughts of what she wanted to do with you.
"Thank you. You look also nice" you smiled. The simple smile you sent Alexia made heart her burst with emotion. She wanted to make you smile everyday.
Just as she was about to ask what you‘re going later, a certain English defender called your name.
"I have to go" you stated, walking to Lucy. The captain growled, Lucy was getting on her last nerve.
-
In the bus, you starred out of the window as you waited for your bus buddy.
you loved the bus, something about the rides and the bonding made it so special. While you weren‘t one of the louder ones, you loved to observe everybody on the bus.
In the front, coach and staff, talking and analyzing.
In the middle the quieter ones, the ones who enjoy reading, studying or sleeping.
And in the back, the extroverts, the ones who would never shut up and couldn‘t sit still.
It surprised you when you felt a different presence next to you, not the one who it was usually. A familiar scent hit your nostrils, a scent you learned to like, a scent that made you inhale sharply.
"Hola" Alexia greeted, slumping down in the seat next to you. You looked around, searching for your bus buddy who was sitting next to Alexia’s bus buddy, shrugging her shoulders at your questioning look. "What are you doing here?" you asked rather harshly.
Alexia gulped, "do you not want me here?"
"N-no. I- um" nervously you scratched the back of your neck, "you usually don‘t sit next to me" you smiled shyly.
"But now I want to" she explained, her eyes searching for any sign of discomfort. There was none. "I watched the movie you recommended"
"Did you like it? Who‘s your favorite character?" question after question left your mouth. Each one la reina answered happily. She loved talking to you, how passionate you got and how interested you seemed to be in whatever other people said.
-
Alexia couldn’t stay away from you.
Not when you smiled at her, the way you do.
Not when you laughed, the way you do.
Not when you just existed.
Her mind was consumed by the thoughts of you. Everything you did made her heart race.
Alexia Putellas, la reina, the queen of football, was falling you.
And even though she was known for her fun nights and had a bad reputation because of that, ever since you had entered her life it stopped. She didn‘t look nor acknowledge other women, she only had eyes for you.
-
Movie night at Patri‘s.
You arrived exhausted, eyes already heavy as you took a seat on the bean bag. The team was gathered around the living room, the curtains closed as snacks were standing on the coffee table. You didn‘t know why you were so tired, you just were. It didn‘t take long for your eyes to fully close. As your body started to lean down, almost falling off the bean bag, Alexia reacted without a second thought. Quickly, she left her seat on the couch and kneeled next to you. Instead of your head falling against the floor, it fell against her chest. The girls were too occupied by the movie to even notice the change - besides Lucy. The English woman watched the scene in front of her, Alexia scooping your small figure up and positioning the two of you on the bean bag, her arms securely around you, your head resting against her chest as she looked down at you, a loving smile across her features.
For once, Lucy didn‘t glare at the midfielder but had a small smile on her face. Maybe Alexia was indeed not the person who she thought she was.
-
Barcelona was facing Athletic Bilbao and while you were in the starting eleven, Alexia rested on the bench.
The game didn’t start the way she wanted it to - too much chaos. It didn‘t ease her nerves either that every time you had the ball, you were smashed to the ground a second after. It made her mad actually, furios even. In her mother tongue she started to curse, at first it was just an angry whisper until it turned into mad shouting. What the fuck was wrong with that ref?! Was he blind?
"Calm down, he already warned you" Lucy told her firmly, pulling her back to her seat. "She‘s getting hurt!" the midfielder huffed, crossing her arms.
"I know" it took every inch of self-control in her body not to join Alexia‘s shouting.
The Catalonian looked at Lucy, eyes so full of helplessness, "this is personal" she whispered.
With raised brows, Lucy questioned Alexia‘s statement. What was personal? How? "Look at number 6. We have, um, history?"
"You fucked her?"
"Yes"
"And she wanted more but you didn‘t even remember her name?"
"yeah…"
Lucy turned away, her gaze back on the pitch - observing
"She is different" Alexia whispered, "I don‘t know. My heart is- so incredibly happy by just seeing her smile. I want to make her smile. I think I’m in love-"
Just as Alexia was about to admit her love for you, something she had never done nor felt before, Lucy and the whole bench jumped from their seats, yelling furiously.
Harsh tackle.
Your ankle connecting with cleats. Cleats who belonged to number 6.
Your body was shaking violently while you clutched your ankle, crying. The girls on the field tried their best to comfort you, medics already examining your foot. Nervously Lucy and Alexia walked along the sidelines, biting their nails. Even though anger flashed through their bodies, their one priority was your well-being and it didn‘t look like you were feeling well, not at all. The decision was clear: you‘re coming off. Mariona and Marta supported you as you hobbled with tear stained cheeks off the field, where Alexia and Lucy immediately took over their part.
-
Thankfully, it wasn‘t something too serious. The medics gave you a boot and crutches, so you wouldn‘t injure your foot any further on your way back to Barcelona.
Relief washed over the teams body as they saw you back with them, smiling. That tackle looked harsh and nothing but a yellow card was shown. "Should‘ve been a red" some of the girls grumbled as you joined their huddle before they swarmed out, interacting with fans.
"Little one, how are you feeling?" the English defender asked, looking at you skeptically. "I‘m alright, just need to rest" you stated.
Alexia watched you from afar while she talked to one of the medics. She had to know everything - down to the detail. She addressed it as captain duties, what was best for her team but in reality, she needed to know for her sake. Were you alright? When will your recovery start? How will your treatment look like? Will you be back for the el Classico (not because she wanted your talent too rushed back on the field but because she knew how much the el Classico meant to you.) Alexia asked every question that popped up in her mind and even though the medic was annoyed because most of her questions were already answered, just a little bit differently explained, he was happy that she cared for you so deeply.
Though when a third person entered your conversation with Lucy, she became alert, her latest question long forgotten. "What the fuck" she growled, marching over to where you were, arm snuggling around your waist as she glared at number 6. you gasped slightly at the cold yet gentle touch around your back.
"Alexia" the woman said, to which Alexia only gave a nod.
"Can I talk to you for a minute in private?" number 6 asked you nicely, ignoring the murderous glare Alexia sent her, who was joined by Lucy‘s glare. "Sure" you replied, walking out of earshot.
"Lo siento" she started, gesturing to your boot, "I didn’t mean to" she apologized sincerely, "how bad is it?"
La reina was going crazy - why the fuck was she standing so close to you? Even worse, touching your arm! Jealousy filled her body, a deep frown displayed on her face. It only deepened when you started giggling with the enemy.
"Are you not going to do something about it?" Lucy asked, crossing her arms.
"I absolutely will!" when number 6 pressed a kiss to your cheek, the midfielder lost it. Within seconds she was by your side, shielding you from the other woman who was way too close to you. "You can go now!" she growled, intimidating number 6.
She left.
She wouldn‘t risk it to fight la reina.
"Hey! I was talking to her" you grumbled.
"She was kissing you!"
"She apologized"
"By kissing you?!" her voice level raised, fingers resting at the bridge of her nose.
Everything started getting too much for Alexia, why was she so angry? why couldn’t she control her emotions? She always could! Why not now?!
"I have to go"
As quickly as she had appeared, she disappeared again.
-
Alexia avoided you on the way back to Barcelona. Like she used to she sat with her friends in the back, your bus buddy next to you. La reina seemed to have forgotten you existed, occupied by other things - though that wasn‘t true at all. For the midfielder there was no one else existing but you.
She felt the urge to sit next to you, explain herself and to wash that stupid kiss off your cheek - to pepper her own kisses all over your face. She did none of it, she just watched you in silence while the girls talked and talked and talked.
-
The bus arrived in Barcelona hours later, it was already dark outside, only a few cars left on the road. Every girl was eager to get out of the bus and go home, the day has been long and everybody was exhausted.
You were standing in the bus, waiting for everybody to get out, Alexia behind you. Occasionally, her hand would brush against yours as you waited for the girls in front of you to exit the bus. Your breath hitched when you felt Alexia’s pinky intertwine with yours - you didn‘t turn to her, your gaze fixed on Mapi‘s back. The only reaction she got was the blush that arose on your cheeks which you quickly covered with coughing. "You alright?" Mapi asked, holding her arm out to help you down the stairs as your crutches were safely stored away near the suitcases. "Yeah, thank you" you smiled.
With sad eyes, Ale watched you leave.
-
"How is your ankle?" the Catalonian asked, watching you walk out of the physio room.
"It‘s good. I don‘t have to rest anymore" you replied sweetly, happy to be able to train with the team again. "that‘s great" the captain stated, following your steps to the changing room. She wanted to say so much yet no words left her mouth. The effect you had on her was something she never experienced before. It wasn‘t just your smile or laugh that made her heart race, every time she was near you her knees went weak, her palms got sweaty and she became a nervous wreck.
-
The el Classico win felt euphoric. A 5-0 win, wow. Barca had destroyed Real and the team couldn‘t be happier.
It was an unspoken rule for the team to celebrate after winning against Real Madrid. Which is why the team met at their local club, all of the girls dressed up, ready to eat, drink and dance.
You considered not to go - you weren‘t the type of person who enjoyed going out much but then again, dressing up, eating and little bit of dancing didn’t sound too bad, did it?
That‘s how you found yourself in the filled club, friends and strangers around you. You sat next to Patri and Pina, talking about something when Alexia joined the table again. She looked breathtaking, her outfit hugged her body perfectly - everybody was drooling, including you.
Throughout the night numerous people asked her to dance or for her number, each time she would decline politely, searching for your eyes shortly after. She wanted to talk to you, so desperately.
As another woman appeared who started talking to Alexia, even laughing with her, you left the table, "I’m getting something to drink, does anybody want something?" you asked.
Making your way over to the bar, you took a seat on one of the bar stools, "one water, vodka on ice, a martini and mojito, please" you ordered.
Alexia watched you like hawk, the rather abrupt leaving and the quick steps catching her attention.
She wanted to follow you, she really wanted to - she didn‘t.
You came back with all of the wished drinks, walking past la reina and the girl she was talking to.
"Let‘s dance!" Ona suddenly yelled, grabbing your wrist and pulling you on the dance floor, the girl already more than just tipsy. Nonetheless, you accepted her dragging you to the dance floor, arms around your neck as she danced. "Arms around my waist, chica!" you did as she wished, not having a clue about dancing but happily doing whatever the younger girl requested. It was her first derby win, let the girl celebrate.
La reina didn‘t enjoy that at all. Seeing the young defenders arms all over you and the close dancing made her burst with emotion. That should be her. She should be dancing with you. Nobody should talk to her besides you.
It should be you and her.
"Fuck it" walking over to you, the midfielders arms snuggled around your waist, pulling you against her front as you left Ona‘s touch completely. "Can I steal her for a moment?" Alexia asked in her mother tongue, smiling nicely at her national teammate who nodded, continuing her dancing.
"You look so beautiful, mi amor" she whispered in your ear. You looked at her with wide eyes, frowning.
"Did I say something wrong?"
"You‘re-" you cut yourself off, not knowing what to say, "Just- leave me alone" left your lips. Wiggling out of her grasp, you walked towards the exit, Alexia close behind. Outside the club, she gently grabbed your wrist, "what do you mean with that?"
"Leave me alone! What game are you playing, hm?!"
"Que?"
"Don‘t you think I know about your little reputation? Barcelonas star footballer loves to fuck random girls" you gritted through your teeth, hidden feelings bubbling up.
"I‘ve been warned about you. And I ignored each warning because you were so nice and caring." you told her, the captain taking back by your sudden outburst, "I don‘t want to be part of your stupid reputation!"
"Stop talking" the midfielder stopped you, face stern, "fuck, do you think I‘d use you?!"
"I don’t know what to think! In one second you‘re getting mad at me because someone kissed my cheek, then you ignore me and then you‘re so lovely, just to talk to some woman again! You‘re so confusing!"
"I haven’t looked at other women since you joined Barca! You‘re the only person I want to look at!" she inhaled sharply before she dropped your hands, resting her forehead against yours, "I don’t want to be confusing" her hands found their place on your waist.
"Are you going home with that woman?"
It was the question that had bothered you the whole night, you just had to know. "No, of course not. She‘s a friend from Alba. I haven’t- you know, not since you‘re here." la reina admitted, "I‘m in love with you and this is all so new, I don’t know how to do this but I’m willing to learn."
You stared at her, was this real? Your heart was racing, breath hitching at the slightest movement of Alexia’s hands, her breath fanning - so close to you.
"No"
"No?"
"No."
Taking a step back, you left her embrace. This was too much - you couldn’t think straight. You wanted to believe her, you really did but you had to protect yourself. You couldn’t be one of her flings. It would hurt too much, to see her and knowing what you‘ve done.
"I‘m sorry, Alexia"
you left without turning back.
You felt your heart hammer in your chest, already regretting your choice, the sad look on Alexia’s face haunting you.
Her eyes followed you until you were out of sight. She felt numb. She sat down on the nearest bench, head resting in her hands as she tried to contain herself.
She wanted to cry, she wanted to go home, she wanted to hide under duvet the rest of her life. She embarrassed herself and that wasn‘t who she was.
She was Alexia Putellas.
La reina.
Queen of football.
Fan favorite - everybody’s favorite, just not your favorite.
From all the names she‘d been called, your favorite would have been the best - the greatest honor, actually.
"Hey, are you alright?" a thick english accent asked, sitting down next to her.
"Sí! Sí, I’m good, i‘m good" she rushed out as she looked up, wiping away the tears that had left her eyes just seconds ago. "What‘s happened?" Lucy asked.
"She- she rejected me" Ale whispered, shoulders sagging - exhaustion written over her features.
The defender was silent for a few minutes, letting Alexia calm down and gather her thoughts.
"You know, you can’t blame her" Lucy explained, "your reputation isn‘t the best"
"I don’t blame her. It just hurts so much"
the english woman laid her arm around the midfielders shoulder, trying to comfort her. Lucy knew you liked her but you feared that you‘d be a someone on her list. Also, she knew how awful it felt to get rejected. "She‘s scared"
"Of me?"
"Of your past"
The Catalonian gulped, why had she been so stupid? Why did she build up a reputation? She hated herself for it. All she wanted was you. You weren‘t like the girls whose namens she couldn‘t even remember. You were so, so much more.
She remembered everything you once told her.
She remembered the way you like your coffee and tea.
She remembered your favorite book, movie and show.
She remembered your stories.
She knew which flowers you liked.
She knew that you didn‘t like drinking.
She knew every detail about the things you told her.
"She‘s special" the Barcelona captain stated, firm with her words as she spoke facts.
"Show her."
-
Over the next few weeks, Ale did what Lucy told her to. She showed you how much she respected you, bought you flowers and did little things. She‘d tie your shoes, she‘d refill your glass, and so on. She did everything in her power to make you realize that she was worth a chance - that her past didn’t define her. And that she won‘t continue this path.
-
"How are you feeling about the win and the teams performance?" the interviewer asked Alexia who smiled politely at the lady.
"The team performed great, we played very well. We created a lot of chances which we ultimately took advantage of" she replied.
The interview continued like that, analyzing the game, talking about the impact the subs brought with them and the things the team could’ve done better.
It seemed like a normal interview until it took a turn, much to Alexia’s dislike.
"You haven’t been seen with any girls lately - what‘s happened to this version of yourself?"
Unfortunately for the interviewer, you were in earshot. Your body filled with rage. How can someone be this inappropriate? In an instant you marched over, your hips pushing Alexia slightly out of the camera angle, arm protectively around her waist. "This interview is ended" you stated sternly. You weren’t a media person at all, never knowing what to say, more of a private person - that question was enough for you to throw everything overboard. This was nothing but disrespectful.
You grabbed Alexia’s hand, about to pull her fully away from the media as she instead stepped back in.
"That version fell in love"
with that being said, she let you drag her away into the tunnel.
You grumbled something to yourself, angry about the fact that the lady had the audacity to ask something like that, "why did you answer that? You gave her so much satisfaction by answering!"
"Stop pacing around, please" gently she grabbed your wrists, frowning as the scowl didn’t leave your features.
"It was the right thing to do" she answered calmly while her index finger tried to erase the wrinkle between your brows.
"No- she-"
"I am in love with you and i want everyone to know that," she stated, "I‘m not that person anymore!"
You inhaled, closing your eyes as you relaxed in her close proximity.
"I know you‘re not"
"One chance, that‘s all i ask for" she pleaded, her hand cupping your cheek.
"Okay"
"Okay?"
"Okay."
Both of you smiled shyly with cheeks crimson red.
-
Alexia stood next to the door, waiting for you to exit the Barcelona facility.
Finally, when she saw you leaving the building, she pushed herself off the wall and quickly slipped her hand into yours, "hi" she smiled, teeth showing as you matched her smile. "I was thinking… um, would you like to go out? With me? On a date?" She had been nervous all day long, wanting to ask the question.
Your smile grew wide, "I’d love to!"
"great!" the captain beamed, "I’ll pick you up" she left your touch, happily walking towards her car before realizing something. Hurriedly, she made her way back to you, "tonight, 6pm, i mean"
-
She was Alexia Putellas.
La reina.
Queen of football.
Fan favorite - everybody’s favorite.
"Amor, say it." she whined, pressing multiple kisses over your face. You wiggled in her grasp as she straddled your waist, your giggles filling the room - heaven for her ears.
"Noooooo"
The captain looked down at you, a mischief smirk making its way on her face.
"Don‘t you dare, Ale!" you laughed, but it was too late - the tickle fight broke out. It was obvious that your girlfriend was winning, no chance for you to win as she had you pinned down on the couch.
"Say it, mi amor"
"only if i get a kiss…" you grinned.
Within seconds Alexia leaned down, pecking your lips.
giggling, you added, "…or two"
she leaned back down, pecking your lips once more. "or three or four or five" you sing-sang, laughing at the midfielders playful glare. After multiple added kisses, Ale had enough. She cupped your cheeks, lips pressing against your own with a gentle force. The air was knocked out of your lungs. Her thumb caressed your cheeks and you couldn‘t help but smile into the kiss as she kissed you with so much love and appreciation.
"you’re my favorite"
———————
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By Your Side, Always (Alexia Putellas x reader)
A/N: We’re supercampeones!!! I’m not sure what this is but I hope you like it.
The first 45 minutes of the game you were having fun, the whole team was. Levante knew that Barcelona would make them work but tonight you and the team were putting on a world class performance. They were never a team to give up but with 7 goals scored and them not being able to find the net, they struggled to find hope and accepted their defeat. They were now fighting to keep the score at 7 and it started to get messy.
It was clear that you had been made a target by Levante’s entire back line. You didn’t care though, you could take it. If anything you welcomed the physically because it meant you were allowed to give them a taste of their own medicine every so often.
Alexia wished she could be on the pitch with you but she must admit it was fun being in the stand watching you play the way you were.
“She’s showing off” Mapi said to no one in particular as she watched you dance around their left back even looking back and smirking to her once you sent the ball into the box.
“She’s unstoppable when she’s like this” your girlfriend says.
She regretted her choice of words not even a minute later. There were two defenders between you and the goal. You were determined to make it 8. That is until you get taken out by not one but two players. You felt one set of studs go into the outside of the ankle and another set on the inside. You truly had never felt pain like it.
Alexia heard your outcry of pain and could do nothing but watch as you laid on the floor clutching your ankle.
“I need you to get up. I need to go to her” Alexia stood to her feet, desperate to be by your side.
“You can’t go onto the pitch” Mapi slowly got up, careful not to knock her knee.
Her warning fell on deaf ears and Alexia was already rushing towards the pitch. As expected she was stopped by Jona but she stayed near the sidelines waiting for you.
“Please get up” Alexia whispers to herself. She began to fear the worst when she sees the physio signal for a stretcher.
“We both know she’s too stubborn to use it Alexia. Give her a few minutes and she’ll be up” Jona pats his captain’s shoulder in support.
The coach was right. It took a little longer than Alexia would have like but you are up on your feet. It’s obvious that the injury is bad because you are using the teams physios as crutches so you don’t put any weight on your ankle.
What is the ultimate telling sign is the way you refuse to meet Alexia’s gaze when you get to the sidelines. Nevertheless she follows you into the tunnel and waits by the door of the medical room.
“Come with me, please” you have your back towards Alexia but she can hear the pain in your tone.
“I’m here”
Alexia sits on a chair beside you as the physio begins examining your ankle. At the first touch you wince and move your foot away which only makes it hurt more. He gives you a couple of minutes to compose yourself but asks to try again. Your arms hide your face as the pain becomes excruciating. The only thing stopping you from breaking completely is the soothing way Alexia is stroking her hand over your thigh.
“They’re almost done. Try and breathe for me ok?”
And try you did but you also failed. It was a form of panic and you knew it.
The physios explain that they think it’s major ligament damage and that they will take you for scans once you’re back in Barcelona.
“I’m going to give you some space. Alexia, make sure she ices it and try to get her to stay still. Give it ten minutes then she can put the boot on and use the crutches. No weight on it, understand?”
“They studded my ankle, not my ears. Don’t speak about me as if I’m not here” you sit up quickly. At least now you understood why you needed to keep still.
Alexia got up as the physio left. She places ice on your ankle as gently as she could before she turned out the lights. She knew that when you were overwhelmed the darkness help calm whatever you were feeling inside.
“Whatever it is, i’ve got you. I know how you think and how you’re going to want to do this alone but that won’t happen. I won’t let it”
Alexia moves the chair so that it was closer to your head. She places a gentle kiss on the crown on your head.
“I don’t want to talk about it”
You turn your head away from her. That hurt Alexia but she knew it was your coping mechanism and once you’ve processed what’s happened you will be more open to talk.
Alexia had just opened her mouth when she heard a door slam and a lot of foul language.
“That’s Lucy and if she’s in here for the reason I think then I’m going to kill her”
Your girlfriend rolled her eyes. You weren’t in the mood for this and deep down she knew the reason why the English defender was now in lockeroom even though there is 10 minutes left, maybe less.
“Y/N I’m coming in” technically it wasn’t a question but still she could have waited for a response.
“Get out” you growl.
“Oh did I interrupt something” Lucy gives you both a playful look.
“You’re a fucking idiot Luce. I know for a fact you didn’t get subbed off because that wasn’t part of the plan so that only leaves one reason”
“Y/N calm down” alexia begs.
“I was defending you. They took you out. I wasn’t going to let them get away with it” Lucy met your anger and walked towards you. That was a mistake.
“Get out!” You stand up and your own weight collapses underneath you.
“Lucy, please” Alexia begs your England team mate who raises her hands in defeat and leaves you be.
She then helps you back on the bed. A couple of minutes pass and you hear the final whistle following by the cheers of your team.
“I’m not going back out. Torre can lift the trophy”
“Y/N. You’re their captain and you scored a hattrick. It should be you up there”
“Well I’m not going to be and you can go tell them. Go Alexia”
She saw the look in your eyes. The look, which in the past, told her that your mind was made up and there was nothing she could do to change it.
“Just come out when you’re ready. We don’t let moments pass by without celebrating them. You told me that” before leaving Alexia made sure she turned on the TV so that you could at least watch the trophy ceremony.
You didn’t like what you just did but you did it anyway. Alexia has had a tough few weeks and she need this, she needed it more than you needed her.
As instructed Marta lifts the trophy and you feel fine about it. Barcelona has a group of leaders but it just so happens that only one can wear the armband.
The silence wasn’t comfortable and it started to put you on edge. You saw the boots and crutches by the examination table taunting you.
Don’t let the moment pass by.
Alexia watches Marta lift the trophy and then celebrated with the team like they do after every trophy win. She hoped you might have come out by now.
She is near the centre circle when she hears the crowd errupt. She may have her back to the tunnel but she knows it’s you.
“I thought you said she wasn’t coming out” Jana asks.
“No. I said she wasn’t lifting the trophy” Alexia knew you would come out. Due to your slow pace, no thanks to the crutches, Alexia met you half way.
You let the crutches drop to the floor as you wrap your arms around her neck.
“I’m sorry for pushing you away. I just —“
“Needed a minute. I know. You’re here now and that’s all that matters” she lets you rest against her as your hands you the crutches.
“Have you been crying mi amor?” She noticed the tear staines on your cheeks.
You nod slightly and she can see that something is going on in your head because your eyes begin to well up. Alexia cups your cheek and gently wipes away the stray tear that has fallen.
“You don’t have to wait until I’m not there to cry Y/N”
“I know”
Side by side you walk towards your team mates who are all ready to greet you. Bruna is the first one too you, of course she is.
“Here” she hands you the game ball “I got everyone to sign it for you”
“Thanks B. You know I’ve got so many of these I’ve lost count. Why don’t you go give it to a fan?” The young forward takes the ball back happily and runs towards a little girl. She makes her turn around so that you can see the fan is wearing you shirt. You send her a little wave and it makes her day.
“I don’t want to be injured” you stick your bottom lip out causing you girlfriend to chuckle slightly.
“We’re professional football players, we never want to be injured but sometimes it happens. There’s nothing we can do about it” Alexia was full of wisdom.
She definetly didn’t feel this way when she got hurt but you decide not reopen old wounds.
“And these things are stupid” you wave one of your crutches around.
“Are you going to be complaining everyday until you’re back on the pitch?”
“Yes Alexia, I am. If you don’t like it then tough because you’re stuck with me”
“I’m ok with that and I’m ready to return the favour because we both know I wasn’t exactly a ray of sunshine when I got injured”
“You can say that again. I almost sent you back home to your mothers” you were teasing her and she knew it. You didn’t like being more that 5 feet away from Alexia when she was hurt.
“We both know if I went back to my mama’s that you would be right behind me”
You could only nod in agreement. Alexia suggests you do what will be half a lap of the pitch so you can thank you fans. It’s a slow amble but she doesn’t seem to mind. The rest of the team had walked ahead so now it was just you, Alexia, Mapi and Ingrid.
“Does this mean we can do our physio together?” Mapi asks you.
“No” Alexia and Ingrid say in unison.
“Why not? We will push each other to get better”
“And that’s the reason why. You’re too competive, you will make it into a game and we” she points to herself and Alexia “know that it’ll end badly”.
When you are back at the hotel you are dragged into the celebrations and for the most part you don’t mind it. After a little while you realise that Alexia isn’t around and that is something you do mind. You feel yourself getting more anxious without having her calming presence beside you.
Then you hear your phone go off.
Come to you room. Your rehab starts now.
When you enter your room, Alexia is standing outside the bathroom.
“I’m going to need you to remove your clothes” Alexia says and your eyes widen.
“Ok” you pull your shirt off in record time, the shorts however were more of a task.
“Let me” once the injured leg was free alexia places your crutches aside “rest on me” she tells you.
She looks up grinning like a devil which makes you shake your head. She always did have half a mind in the gutter when it came to you.
“Maybe later” she pecks your lips and doesn’t expect for you to pull her back in for something more passionate.
“Sure, Putellas”
She pretends to act offended at the use of her surname. Alexia then uses her strength to lift you backwards and onto the bed, something she could have done earlier.
“I’m going to take your boot off. It might hurt” she was so gentle in the way you undid the Velcro straps. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry” she says when she hears you wince.
“I’m ok” you reassure her even though you were far from it.
What happens next came as a shock but a good one. Alexia lifts you up and carries you bridal style towards the bathroom where you are met with a bubble filled bath.
“You did this for me?”
“Yes. Although I’m going to be joining you so I guess it’s also for me”
“Are you now?” You tease.
Alexia nods her head in excitement with a huge smile plastered on her face.
Your girlfriend helps you in and then lowers herself behind you. With one hand on your thigh and the other one on your abdomen, you allow yourself to relax. As you tilt your head back to rest against Alexia it gives her full access to your exposed neck and she takes advantage of the opportunity. She knows things can’t get too heated so she settles with peppering kisses on your sensitive spots.
The two of you stay in the bath until the water becomes cold and your hands like like prunes.
“You’re strong Y/N, you’ll be ok” Alexia says as she lays in bed with you. You have a movie on and somehow Alexia has gotten some popcorn.
“I’ll be alright”
It wasn’t how you expected the night to end. You thought you would be celebrating with your team, jumping for joy and taking advantage of the free champagne. Instead you are in bed, with you leg elevated and ice compressing the injured area. The this one commonality in the current and what come have been; you have Alexia by your side.
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all of my past i tried to erase it
part 3 of family line
tensions are still high between Ingrid and her sister. Mapi tries to keep the peace. Solstråle tries to pretend she's fine. Ingrid tries to pretend she isn't going insane not understanding what is going on.
cw: mentions of poor mental health / panic attacks. ingrid is pretty worried about solstråle and whether or not she is safe.
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It wasn’t really anyone’s fault. Mapi bringing her parents to the match shouldn’t have gotten to you the way it did. You didn’t really have an explanation for it, either. You saw Ingrid talking to Mapi’s mom and it felt like everything that had gotten marginally better in the last few days had miraculously disappeared.
You were 8 again, sitting in the office at school, fielding pitying looks from the office ladies. Both of your parents were busy watching one of Ingrid’s matches; at just 16, she was playing for Rosenborg. Your mom was supposed to bring you to watch, too. She’d forgotten.
You were 10 again, lying to the school nurse that your parents hadn’t known you’d hurt your hand. She said it looked broken, and you pretended that you hadn’t asked your mom to take you to the doctor the night before. You pretended your mom hadn’t told you to stop faking injuries when the attention wasn’t on you for one minute.
You were 13 again, sobbing into your pillow, while everyone celebrated just down the hall. Ingrid was leaving to play in Lillestrøm. 5 hours away. She was leaving you behind.
You were 16, having just been dumped by your first girlfriend. You’d come home in tears, and when you told your dad what was wrong, he told you it was for the best, that a girlfriend was just a distraction. He warned you not to bother your sister with this, because she was busy with much more important things in Barcelona.
You were 17, so drunk you could barely speak, walking home on a dark road in the middle of the night because neither of your parents had answered the phone to come and get you from the horrific party you already regretted attending. It was dark, a windy road you were walking along, and if a car came, you weren’t sure your reflexes would be quick enough. You were 17, stumbling over the smooth pavement, the depression you’d been trying to drown in alcohol making a reappearance. You were 17, thinking that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if it all ended there, just like this.
You were 17, standing in the airport with your parents, preparing to board the plane to Spain. You leaned in towards your mother for a hug. She avoided it, pinching your cheek lightly, and reminding your father that they had a dinner reservation to get to. You watched them walk out of the airport from your place in the security line. Your vision was blurred with tears, but you still could tell that they didn’t look back at you once. You were 17, and your mom hadn’t told you she loved you before you moved across the continent.
In a second, all of these memories that you’d fought so hard to keep locked away deep inside your head were flooding out. Tears were pricking your eyes, and you cursed yourself for being so stupid. Ingrid didn’t care. Mapi didn’t care. You weren’t worth caring about. How had you forgotten that? How had you let yourself forget that, after everything?
Ingrid didn’t see your expression change, too busy thanking Mapi’s parents profusely for coming to see her play. Mapi did, though. She watched as you caught sight of your sister talking to her mom, and she watched as you flinched like someone had swung at you. She watched as you slipped out of the crowd, speed walking into the building. Mapi was torn in 2 directions, Ingrid on one side, and you running off the other way. You needed Ingrid, most definitely but Mapi didn’t like the look on your face as you ran off, like all of the emotion had been sucked out of you, and all that was left was exhaustion.
Someone else had noticed your disappearing act, though. Caro stood, staring after you, before her gaze fell to Mapi, raising an eyebrow. The defender nodded, and Caro followed after you, while Mapi turned to her girlfriend. She pulled her away from her parents with an apologetic smile, appreciating that Alexia walked over and picked up the conversation where it had left off.
“Ingrid, vamos,” Mapi whispered urgently. Ingrid looked at her, confused and unmoving.
“What? I was in the middle of a conversation, María,” the Norwegian scolded.
“I know, it’s your Solstråle, though, she’s upset, come on,” Mapi insisted, pulling on Ingrid’s hand, who finally seemed to feel a sense of urgency, and let Mapi lead her into the building.
“Upset? Why? Did something happen?”
“She saw you with my mom and just looked really upset.” Mapi explained. A bit of understanding washed over Ingrid’s face, and now she was the one leading her girlfriend, rushing down the hall and beginning to open door after door in search of you.
Caro, meanwhile, had found you pretty easily. You were on the floor of a room she often came to when she was overwhelmed, although that happened much less these days. You knew Caro, obviously, and she knew you, had known you since you were pretty young. She had a calming presence, and the minute she sat next to you, and extended her hand in your direction, you took it gratefully.
“Mapi is bringing Ingrid.” She told you, but didn’t say anything else. She just sat next to your trembling form and held your hand. It was enough for now, enough until your sister arrived.
And when Ingrid did arrive, it was with a loud bang as she threw the door open, sighing in relief at the sight of you. Though, that relief quickly dissolved back into worry at the state you were in. She quickly took Caro’s place at your side, hesitantly wrapping an arm around your shoulders. Your sister was surprised when you turned and threw your arms around her neck, crying silently into her shirt.
“Jeg har deg, kjære. Det er greit, du er ok.” She murmured, looking worriedly at the other two women hovering in the doorway of the room. Mapi nodded at her encouragingly, and Ingrid refocused, rubbing a hand slowly up and down your back.
“Thank you,” Mapi muttered to Caro, as they both stepped into the hall to give you some space.
“Of course.” Caro said easily. “She having a hard time?”
“Which one?” Mapi asked wryly. “Yes. It’s… it’s a work in progress.”
“She’s a good kid.” Caro noted, Mapi nodding her head in agreement. “Well, Marta and I are around if either of you need anything.”
“Thank you, Caro. Really.” Mapi said, squeezing the forward’s shoulder. Caro just shrugged like it was no big deal, and headed back out to the pitch. When Mapi reentered the room, you were tucked perfectly into Ingrid’s lap, although you seemed to have calmed down some. Ingrid was speaking to you in hushed Norwegian, and something she said had you lurching away from her and to your feet, stumbling blindly to the door.
“Solstråle, wait,” Ingrid called, not really sure what she said to upset you, but well aware that it had been something. You fell right into Mapi’s arms, and though she looked a little startled, she easily pulled you close.
“Okay, it’s alright. We’re all okay.” She murmured, noticing the rather heartbroken expression on her girlfriend’s face at the fact that you had fled from her right into Mapi’s arms. After a few minutes, you said something quietly that neither girl could hear. “What was that, nena?”
“Can we go ho- back to the house?” You asked, correcting yourself quickly, and pulling away from the comforting embrace Mapi had you in. Ingrid felt like you’d stabbed her, honestly, when you didn’t let yourself call it home. You were stoic again, though, your face void of emotion, wiping roughly at your cheeks to rid them of tears.
“Kjære,” Ingrid said, hating the way you forced all evidence of your breakdown away. You’d been so upset, about something, but now you were acting as though nothing had happened. Your sister would have climbed into your brain if she could’ve, just to understand what was going on in there.
“Let’s go home.” Mapi said easily, shooting her girlfriend a meaningful look. Ingrid wasn’t supposed to push you, she knew that. It was just getting harder and harder to not do so, especially when she could see how much pain you were in. She couldn't understand why you wouldn’t just talk to her, and you couldn’t understand why she was so concerned or why she was so desperate to hear what you were feeling. And considering it was the two of you, the situation was bound to blow up into an argument. It was just a matter of time.
-------
Ingrid knew what was coming before her phone rang, but she still desperately wanted to avoid it. She was quite comfortable at the moment, curled up on top of Mapi in their bed, a show playing softly in the background. Mapi was scratching lightly at Ingrid’s scalp with one hand, and tracing lines over her back with the other. The movements made Ingrid’s entire body relax, which had definitely been Mapi’s goal, but it was all interrupted when her phone went off from next to her.
She sat up off her girlfriend, glancing at the screen, her expression hardening.
“Your mom?” Mapi guessed, pulling Ingrid back down into her when the Norwegian declined the call.
“Yes.”
“You haven’t talked to her since Solstråle’s letter, have you?”
“No.” Ingrid said. “I think I hate her right now.”
Mapi was surprised, only because Ingrid didn’t hate anyone. If there was going to be a person, though, it would be someone who had hurt you. Because Ingrid didn’t like to kill spiders she found in the house, but Mapi knew she would kill a person for you without a second thought. “That’s okay. You can hate her.”
“I miss her.” Ingrid admitted after another minute, her voice cracking. Her forehead was scrunched with sadness, and her hands gripped Mapi’s shirt tight in her hands.
Mapi sighed, wishing she could take Ingrid’s pain away. And yours too, for that matter. “You can miss her too. You can feel whatever you need to feel.”
“No, I can’t, not when Solstråle is so upset,”
“How your sister feels does not limit how you feel. You can be hurt, and sad, and frustrated too. It doesn’t take away from pequeña’s feelings. Just like her feelings don’t take away from yours. You are both upset. That’s alright.” Mapi said confidently. “This isn’t just happening to your sister. It’s happening to you, too, and you can be sad, mi amor. You can cry.”
Ingrid hadn’t even known she’d been about to cry until Mapi said that, but suddenly there were tears running down her face, and she was clutching tightly to the Spaniard underneath her, who did not seem surprised at all at the sudden emotion.
“I know, baby.” Mapi husked, pressing kiss after kiss to the top of Ingrid’s head. She knew Ingrid needed this, and was content to let her cry it out until she heard a sharp breath from the doorway. You were standing just outside the room, frozen and horrified.
“I’m sorry, Ing,” you mumbled, having come in to say goodnight, rather stunned to see your sister so distraught.
Ingrid could only cry harder, now furious with herself for letting you see this, but too upset to do anything but squeeze Mapi’s hand, wordlessly begging for her to do something.
“Ven aqui, nena, it’s alright.” Mapi said, gesturing you over to the bed. You looked skeptical, but you did so anyway, carefully sitting on the bed next to your sister.
“I’m really sorry, Ingrid, I don’t mean to stress you out.” You whispered. You were in a guilty mood, it seemed, not an angry one, and Ingrid felt that somehow, she preferred when you were angry to this.
“Don’t apologize, pequeña. You haven’t done anything wrong. Ingrid is upset, and you’re upset. It’s okay to be upset, and it’s okay to cry.” Sometimes, Mapi felt like she was teaching preschoolers how to identify and express their emotions when she talked to the both of you, though that might be an easier task.
“I’m not upset with you, Solstråle, I am upset with mom, and I am upset with myself. You don’t need to say sorry. Not for having a panic attack, for having a hard time, for any of it.” Ingrid managed then, taking your hand in hers.
“I’m doing my best.” You said. “I know I’m not making it easy, but I promise I’m trying.”
“We know you are. You’re doing so well, nena.” Mapi said enthusiastically, with so much excitement at you saying something remotely positive about yourself that you and Ingrid both cracked smiles.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Ingrid asked after a minute. At that, you withdrew, pulling your hand from Ingrid’s and rising from the bed. Both your sister and her girlfriend repressed sighs at your sudden withdrawal.
“No, I’m really tired. I came to say goodnight. I’ll see you guys in the morning.” You rushed out, before bolting out of the room at a speed that could barely be considered a walk.
Ingrid sighed once you were out of earshot, settling back into Mapi. “She’s so difficult.”
“She’s stubborn. Like her sister. She’ll come around, just give her time.” Mapi assured her.
Giving you time, though, was a lot harder than it seemed.
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Your whole life, you had been encouraged by your parents to be smaller, to take up less space. If you were upset, you should keep it to yourself. If you were angry, you should calm down. You were taught that your needs always came second to everyone else’s. You didn’t like to be vulnerable with people, and you didn’t like to put your emotions on others.
So when you woke up the next day, it was the feeling of intense shame swirling around inside of you. You’d ruined what was an impressive win for your sister, and a nice moment with Mapi’s parents. You’d upset Ingrid, so much so that she had cried about it.
Too much. You were being too much.
You resolved yourself to be happy today. If not happy, content. Mapi and Ingrid probably needed a day off from your ridiculous, all over the place, emotions. So today, you wouldn’t feel. You’d be perfect, you’d be small, and you’d cause as little trouble as possible.
What you didn’t expect, though, was for that to be the opposite of what Mapi and Ingrid wanted from you. They didn’t care if you took up space. They just wanted you to talk. More than anything, they just wanted you to be okay, no matter how inconvenient that process was for them.
It was a day off for both girls, due to the match the day before, and they were able to let you sleep in. Ingrid was worried you were sleeping too much, but Mapi assured her that angsty teens always needed a lot of sleep, and depressed teens going through a rough time needed even more sleep. Pair that with the intense panic attack you’d had the day before, you were bound to be exhausted.
When noon rolled around, though, and you’d yet to make an appearance, Mapi relented, much to Ingrid’s relief, who had half a mind to check you for a pulse. Mapi made a coffee to bring up to you, opening your door quietly to find you out cold under the covers.
With Snø clutched tightly in your arms, your nose pressed against the soft polar bear, you looked so young.
“Pequeña, despierta,” Mapi murmured, sitting on the edge of your bed and pulling the covers away from your face a bit.
You blinked up at her groggily, an adorably sleepy expression on your face, and Mapi couldn’t help but push some hair out of your face and smile down at you. You looked slightly suspicious, as you couldn’t remember being woken up like this in the entire time living in Spain, but Mapi just handed you your coffee, and settled on the edge of your bed.
“Morning,” you said after a minute and a rather large sip of coffee.
“Afternoon.” Mapi corrected, a little confused when your face turned red at the comment. “It’s 12:15.”
“That’s weird. Normally Ingrid comes to make sure I’m breathing if I sleep past 10.” You noted.
Mapi chuckled. “We’re working on some of your sister’s annoying habits.”
“Don’t get rid of too many, or there won’t be anything left.” You said, your lips tugging up into a smirk.
“Okay! I will just go through this chocolate croissant I made for you in the garbage!” Ingrid scoffed from the doorway, turning on her heel and marching back down the stairs.
If there was any surefire way to get you out of bed, it was to present you with a breakfast pastry.
Within 90 seconds, you had kicked Mapi out, thrown some clothes on and bounded down the stairs, in search of the promised croissant. It was sitting on a plate at the counter, waiting for you, next to your sister who was glaring at you slightly.
“Thank you, Ing,” you said sweetly, throwing her a charming smile. She rolled her eyes but smiled nonetheless.
You hit Mapi’s hand playfully when she reached for your croissant, and she withdrew it with a laugh. “You’re like breakfast pastries the way Ingrid is about coffee.”
“Reasonable? Reasonably attached to it? Is that what you mean, María?” Ingrid asked with a frown.
“Of course, mi amor.” Mapi said with a smile, kissing Ingrid’s cheek softly. You averted your eyes, but you couldn’t lie and say that it didn’t make you happy to see your sister loved so well.
The morning, or afternoon, was going exactly as you’d hoped. No attempts at conversation. No feelings. Of course, it couldn’t last. Once you’d finished eating, Ingrid perked up and seemed to prepare herself for what she was about to say, which instantly made you weary.
“We should talk about last night, kjære.” Ingrid said calmly.
You froze, slowly putting your mug back on the counter. Both other girls watched the way your whole body tense, the way every ounce of emotion was wiped off your face.
“I’m fine. There’s nothing to talk about.” You said stiffly.
“That is not true. Something upset you, and we should discuss it.” Ingrid argued.
“Ingrid, it’s fine. Just leave it. We don’t need to talk about that. We don’t need to talk about anything.” You replied defensively.
“It’s not fine!” Ingrid said, raising her voice, and shaking off Mapi’s gestures to calm down. “None of this is fine. We need to talk about last night. We need to talk about the letter you wrote. We need to get you in therapy. These are all things that need to happen, solstråle. We’ve given you time, now we need to do this.”
“I am not going to therapy.” You declared, standing up with a scoff and crossing your arms across your chest. “Ingrid, I am fine. I don’t need to talk and I don’t need help.”
Ingrid grew visibly more angry with you at that, throwing her arms up in the air in frustration.
“Amor, take a breath.” Mapi said quietly, sighing to herself when Ingrid did not do so.
“You don’t need help? That is the most untrue thing I have ever heard. You do not write the things that you wrote and then turn around and say you’re fine. You. Need. Help.”
“Ingrid. I am not going to therapy, and I am done talking about this.” You said, your voice dangerously quiet.
Your sister wasn’t phased, stepping closer to you with her eyes narrowed. “You will go to therapy if I say you will, and this conversation is not over until I say it is.”
In retrospect, even Ingrid realized that this was decidedly the wrong thing to say. You didn’t take well to being told what to do. Your reaction really should have been worse; Ingrid had gotten off easy.
“Jesus, Ingrid, do you hear yourself? You sound just like mom.” You spit back, feeling a bit of satisfaction at the hurt that flashed across your sister’s face. “I don’t want to talk about this, especially not with you.” You spun around and began stomping towards the stairs. “Don’t fucking follow me.” You warned over your shoulder, causing Ingrid’s jaw to drop.
“Do not-” Ingrid began, starting after you.
“Amor, leave her.” Mapi said, intervening before Ingrid got very far, and pulling her back.
“She is the most frustrating person on the planet.” Ingrid huffed, slamming a hand down onto the counter. Mapi looked unimpressed.
“She is probably thinking the same thing about you right now. I told you not to push her.”
Ingrid rolled her eyes. “Could you be on my side here for once?” She asked bitingly.
Mapi very calmly shook her head, opening her mouth to explain when Ingrid’s eyebrows flew up on her forehead. “No. I am on your sister’s side, and you should be too. No one has been for a really long time.”
The Norwegian deflated at that, sinking down into one of the stools at the counter. Mapi continued speaking, pulling Ingrid’s hair gently out of the bun it was in, and running her fingers through it. “You’re looking at this wrong, mi amor. She doesn’t need you to talk her into therapy. She’ll get there on her own, you just need to give her time. That girl has a long way to go before she admits she needs help, believe me.”
Ingrid sighed deeply. “Can you go check on her? She’s mad at me, I just need you to make sure she’s okay and she isn’t going to do anything stupid.”
“Of course.” Mapi said, delicately kissing Ingrid’s lips. “I love you.” She reminded the Norwegian with a soft, almost shy smile.
Ingrid wanted to cry at how sweet, how perfect, how helpful and kind and funny and beautiful her girlfriend was. “I love you, so so much.”
Mapi headed for the stairs, and Ingrid made yet another cup of coffee, a coffee she wouldn’t drink.
Because Mapi came running back down the stairs a minute later, an apprehensive look on her face as she approached her girlfriend.
“Mi amor, she isn’t up there.” She said carefully.
“What do you mean she isn’t up there,” Ingrid asked, rising to her feet and feeling panic rise within her.
Mapi just shook her head, putting her hands on Ingrid’s shoulders. “She isn’t up there. Her window is open, I think she snuck out.”
Ingrid felt like something inside of her was collapsing, leaving behind a chasm that was quickly filling with anxiety. “Where… what? She… she’s gone? She…we have to-”
What had you left to do? Only horrible, life shattering options of where you were and what you were doing were flying through Ingrid’s head, and she reached out, latching on to Mapi’s outstretched hands.
“Amor, breathe. Calm down. We’ll find her. Where would she go?”
Mapi hoped, with everything in her, that Ingrid had an answer. Because she had to be calm right now, for Ingrid, but Barcelona was a big city. And if you didn’t want to be found… Mapi didn’t know what would happen.
Ingrid’s mind was racing, but one thought pushed to the front of everything else. “The lake, there’s a lake in Melhus she would always go to when she was upset. She’d go to water, a body of water.”
Mapi nodded. “Okay, there are 2 beaches in walking distance, in opposite directions. We’ll go to one, and we’ll send Frido to the other.”
Privately, Mapi hoped Frido found you first. She wasn’t quite sure that you wouldn’t bolt away from Ingrid, but you wouldn’t be expecting Frido to pop up.
-------
A quick call to Frido later, Mapi was directing one very frazzled Norwegian into the car, and setting off for the beach. Ingrid was deep in thought, and Mapi kept her hand on her girlfriend’s leg, softly and soothingly rubbing her thumb back and forth. It was only a few minutes to the beach, and Mapi knew Ingrid would talk before they arrived.
“Do you think she’d do something stupid?” Ingrid asked anxiously, her hand covering Mapi’s and gripping tightly. The Spaniard didn’t need her to explain what she meant; she knew this question was coming, really.
“She said she wouldn’t.” Mapi said calmly.
“She said she wouldn’t ‘do that to me,’ that doesn’t mean she wouldn’t do it, especially now that she’s mad at me.”
“This is a little fight. She wouldn’t… do that. Not over this.” Mapi reassured her, but Ingrid remained unconvinced.
“I don’t know what she’s thinking, María, maybe she was lying before.”
“Ingrid, mi amor, calm down. You have to trust her. Even when you’re scared, and even when it feels like you should take her bedroom door off the hinges and implant her with a GPS chip. You have to trust her not to hurt herself.”
“But what if she does?” Ingrid asked softly, as if saying the words loud enough would somehow will it into existence.
“We can’t think like that. Promise me you won’t think like that, okay?”
“Okay.” Ingrid agreed faintly. Both of them knew she was lying. It was all she’d been worrying about for days, and all she would worry about for many to come.
--------
Frido found you first. When she drove by the beach and didn't see you there, she got another idea. There was a rock climbing place nearby; Ingrid had said you always used to go to a lake back home when you were upset. Though Frido didn’t want to say so, it had been a long time since Ingrid had lived with you, and it wouldn’t have surprised her if your habits had changed. And the Swede knew from your instagram that you spent a lot of time rock climbing. She told Mapi where she was headed, and sped over to the gym.
Sure enough, as soon as she walked in the building, she spotted you in the middle of the hardest wall, seemingly only using the smallest holds to get yourself up. You were breathing hard, and the worker belaying you looked a bit concerned.
Frido pulled her phone out, shooting off a quick text to Mapi. “She’s here, she’s okay. Let me talk to her, don’t let Ingrid come in. I’ll bring her out.”
Ingrid probably wouldn’t help the situation, if you were as angry as you seemed. The blonde spoke quickly to the front desk attendant, and headed over to where you were.
She stood, just watching you. You were a few feet from the top now, luckily for your hands, which you clearly had not put enough chalk on, and were beginning to really hurt. With only a bit to go, you took a risk, attempting an impressive, one armed pull to get your other hand to the next hold. You just barely missed, falling away from the wall.
“Fuck,” you cursed, swinging back towards the wall and smacking it with your hand. You were lowered down, clearly fuming, and Frido took the opportunity to step in front of you, giving the girl attached to the other end of the rope a look.
“Again,” you requested, avoiding Frido’s gaze.
She took your hand in hers, though, inspecting the tear in your skin, shaking her head. “No, that’s enough Solstråle.”
“Leave me alone, Frido.” You snapped, trying to pull away from her when you felt the rope fall slack. You turned, seeing that the worker had abandoned her harness in favor of going to help someone else, no doubt at Frido’s direction.
You rolled your eyes, quickly regretting it when the Swede raised an eyebrow at you. Ingrid could be scary sometimes, but she had nothing on Frido.
“Are they here?” You asked, loosening the harness and stepping out of it with an exasperated sigh.
“They’re outside. You terrified your sister.” Frido said, pulling you over to a bench and making you sit down, before handing you a bottle of water.
You looked unimpressed. “I’m 18, I can handle myself in the city for an hour.”
“She wasn’t worried about that, she was worried you were going to hurt yourself.” Frido said bluntly, sitting down next to you. She ignored how stiff you’d grown and how uncomfortable you seemed, reaching for your hand and looking at it critically.
“That wasn’t on purpose.” You said defensively, wrenching your hand away once again. “And I told her I wouldn’t do that.”
“Can you blame her for worrying, Solstråle, really? And maybe you didn’t do that on purpose, but you came here to push yourself instead of dealing with your feelings in a healthy way.”
You really hated that she was right. Frido was always right. It was simultaneously her worst and best trait.
“Are they mad?” You asked in a small voice, suddenly looking very much your age. Frido stood and held out a hand to help you up.
“Not right now. Just worried. Ingrid’s going to give you a hug and you’re going to let her.” Frido instructed. You supposed that was fair. And really, you could use a hug. Hugs from your sister always made you feel better, even if you’d never admit it.
As you exited the building, you instantly spotted your sister and her girlfriend by their car. Mapi was leaning calmly against the Cupra, while Ingrid was pacing frantically, speaking fast and gesturing wildly with her hands.
“Did I do that?” You asked quietly.
Frido laughed. “I think she was born like that.”
As you neared the car, Ingrid turned as Mapi pointed at you, her face melting with relief at the sight of you. It really hit you, then, how worried she must have been, to still be so anxious even after Frido had likely told her you were okay. You weren’t making this easy on your sister.
She practically knocked you over with the force of her hug. “You’re okay.” She murmured into the top of your head, leaving a kiss there.
“I’m okay.” You reiterated, letting yourself hug her back tightly, even if it was just for a moment. She felt you tighten your arms around her almost unconsciously, and made a note to hug you more often. Even if it seemed like you weren’t very interested. After a minute she pulled back, placing both hands on your cheeks and making you look at her.
“Next time leave through the front door? And tell me where you’re going? Please?” She asked. You appreciated that she didn’t tell you to do this, leaving it more as a request, although you knew it was a reasonable rule for her to put in place.
“Promise.” You said quietly. She nodded her head, satisfied, before pulling Frido into a hug that also looked to be too tight. Mapi was looking at you, rather unimpressed. You knew she was not happy with you for upsetting your sister so much, and though it annoyed you a bit, you knew it was deserved. And you appreciated that your sister had someone that was so protective over her.
“In the car, nena. I want to talk to you when we get home.” Mapi instructed. You got in the car with no argument, the fight having gone out of you a bit. It had nothing to do with the hug Ingrid had given you, nothing at all. Definitely not. Instead of anger, you only felt apprehension, because Mapi looked dead serious about whatever she wanted to talk about.
-------
You were nothing short of shocked when Mapi opened the door to the garage and gestured you inside upon arriving home. Ingrid watched on anxiously, and you pretended not to see the way Mapi whispered some reassurance to her and kissed her cheek, before pointing her towards the kitchen
You’d never been in the garage before; it was Mapi’s space. You were already invading her home, you wouldn’t invade the one place of the house that was really hers, too. You knew she worked something out there, knew there was a reason both cars parked in the driveway instead of in the garage.
Mapi followed you into the room and sat down on a stool next to the large motorcycle in the middle of the garage. It was clearly in the process of being restored. You hadn’t known Mapi rode motorcycles. Well, you hadn’t known that your sister let Mapi ride a motorcycle. You stood awkwardly in the door as Mapi inspected 2 different wrenches, until she pointed at the stool next to her.
“Ven aqui, nena.” She said.
You took a seat, not really enjoying the tense silence that washed over the room. “Are you mad at me?” You asked after a minute. For all your anger, and all your bravado, you didn’t like it when people were mad at you. Especially not people you looked up to, people you admired.
“No. Not mad, nena. Never mad. I wish you hadn’t snuck out your window, but I understand why you did. I wish sometimes you thought a bit more about how your actions affect me and your sister, but I know how hard that is to do when you’re as angry as you are.”
“I’m not angry.” You said defensively. Mapi rolled her eyes, handing you a couple of tools and beginning to tighten something on the bike.
“You are angry. You’re so angry that you feel like you’re going to explode sometimes. You’re so angry that sometimes you forget that you’re sad, too. You’re angry, and you’re hurt, and I cannot blame you for that. If anyone has a right to those emotions, it’s you.” You didn’t really enjoy being perceived so well, shifting uncomfortably in your seat. “I know angry, nena. Do you remember when I hurt my knee?”
You nodded. The first few weeks of Mapi's injury hadn’t been a fun time, your sister beyond stressed with dealing with Mapi’s injury and her new role in the team, and you’d tried hard to be on your best behavior.
“I started working on this bike a year ago, when everything happened with the Spanish federation. It was Ingrid’s idea, a way for me to distract myself. When I hurt my knee, it had been a bit since I’d worked on it, but suddenly I was back in this garage until all hours of the night. It’s nice to be able to control something like this, when everything else feels out of your control. That is how climbing is for you, yes?”
You relaxed a bit at the turn the conversation was taking, and Mapi wasn’t surprised. It wasn’t just the topic; it was the fact that she wasn’t staring at you, putting pressure on you to give her an answer she wanted to hear. You were just talking. Casually.
“Yeah. I’m in control, and I don’t have to think about anything else. It’s relaxing.”
“It’s good for you to have an outlet like that.” Mapi stated. “This bike was Ingrid’s idea, when we first got together. Do you know what her other idea was?”
You were pretty sure you did, and you grimaced at the thought. “Therapy?”
Mapi snorted, handing you the wrench she was using and taking the screwdriver from your hand. “Yes therapy. You don’t have to look at it like that, though, it doesn’t have to be a bad thing.”
“It’s not for me.” You said decisively.
Mapi just shrugged. “I didn’t think it was for me either.” She paused, knowing your curiosity would get the better of you, and you’d ask for more information.
“What changed your mind?” You asked after a minute.
“Your sister did. After the euros, I had a hard time coming back to Barça and playing. Those weeks were some of the hardest of my life, trying to find my rhythm again but trying to recover from the stress I’d been under that summer. I was a mess. And Ingrid was right there with me, through all of it. I’d had a really bad day, and I asked Ingrid to come home early from a lunch she had. She came home, calmed me down, and afterwards, she asked me if I trusted her. I said I did. And she said that she really wanted me to try therapy. That I didn’t have to feel how I felt, and I deserved help. I deserved to not be miserable. She asked me to try it, for her, just give it a try.”
“And you did.”
“And I did. Because she’d done so much for me, I couldn’t refuse her request. Not when I knew she just wanted the best for me. I gave it a shot, and it helped, more than anything else had helped. It wasn’t a fix all, but it helped. It made me feel like I was doing something to get better.”
Mapi abandoned her work on the bike, looking at you for the first time since you’d entered the garage. You could only see sincerity in her gaze. Not anger, but annoyance. Just sincerity. “You deserve help, Solstråle. No matter how you feel about yourself, Ingrid and I know you. And we know you deserve help. You’re a good person, and you deserve to be happy.”
María sounded so sure. So completely convinced. You looked away from her, blinking hard.
“You don’t have to agree to anything now. Keep an open mind about it. Think about it. Okay?”
“Okay.” You agreed quietly, grateful that Mapi didn’t make a big deal out of it, only nodding slightly.
“One more promise?” She asked.
“What?”
“Talk to us. Or just me, or just Ingrid. We’re a little lost here, nena. It feels like we were just kind of plopped down in the middle of this. We had no idea anything was going on, not really. And all of a sudden we’re reading that letter, and realizing we missed a lot. That’s on us; we should have noticed sooner. We don’t have the whole picture, though, and that makes it really hard for us to figure out how to help you. We’ll both worry a lot less if you talked to us, just a little bit.”
That was reasonable, you had to admit. When she put it like that. You’d spent so much time being annoyed that no one had noticed, then being annoyed when they finally did notice, you hadn’t really spent a ton of time thinking about how little they knew. There was no context to your behavior, aside from what you’d put in the letter. And that just barely scratched the surface. You supposed they deserved an explanation. At least a bit of one.
“I’ll try.” You promised.
Mapi grinned at you this time, an infectious smile. “Bueno! Come here with that wrench. No, that one. Put it on this bolt. Twist.”
And just like that, the conversation was over. Easily. You got the feeling that Mapi would have let it go if you’d insisted on it, but you miraculously felt better. Talking, listening had made you feel better. Mapi had made you feel better.
-------
You both emerged from the garage around an hour and a half later, when the smell of baking cookies became too strong to resist. Ingrid had clearly been stress baking, one of your favorite of her habits. There were at least 3 different types of cookies on the counter, some done baking, some still in progress. It smelled so distinctly of home in the house, it was almost overwhelming.
“I have something for you,” Ingrid said, drying her hands and stepping away from the counter when you walked into the room.
“I can see that.” You said, nodding to the cookies appreciatively, but Ingrid shook her head.
“No, something else.” Ingrid said.
“OH! I do too.” Mapi said excitedly, and they both disappeared in different directions. You stood bewildered in the kitchen, not quite sure what you were about to be given.
They returned simultaneously, each holding what looked to be 2 frames. “Mapi’s first.” Ingrid directed. “I haven’t seen it yet.”
You looked surprisingly at Mapi, taking the present and beginning to unwrap the wrapping paper. “What is this for?” You asked.
“Your birthday.” Ingrid said quietly. You froze momentarily, an unreadable expression flashing across your face. “I know it seems like we forgot, but we didn’t. We got the dates messed up, but we had presents, and we had dinner reservations, just… for the 25th. Not the 15th.”
“Oh. I thought you’d forgotten.” You said slowly, seemingly slightly emotional.
“Nope, just bad at remembering dates. Now open your present.” Mapi said impatiently, bouncing on her feet like an overexcited child.
You unwrapped it slowly, as if you were slightly weary of what it might be. When you pulled the frame from the wrapping paper, though, every wall you’d put up fell instantly, your jaw dropping open at the piece of art in your hands.
It was a map. Not just a map, but a map of all the hiking trails in Barcelona. It was textured, detailed, labeled. It was intricate, all neutrals and earthy colors. It was so you. From the contents to the design, it was like it had been made just for you.
“Mapi…” You whispered, staring, stunned, at the map. “Where did you… how did you… what?”
“Ale’s sister Fresa went to school with this girl that hand makes maps like this. I got her name from diablillo, and I told her what I wanted. Do you like it, do you like it?” Mapi asked excitedly.
Mapi got her answer when you handed the frame to Ingrid, and launched yourself the few feet between you and Mapi, wrapping her in a tight hug. Mapi beamed at Ingrid, who was trying very hard not to cry. She hadn’t even given Mapi any advice on the gift. It had been all her girlfriend’s idea, she executed it all by herself, determined to get Solstråle the perfect gift.
“It’s perfect, thank you María,” you mumbled. The ridiculous smile on Mapi’s lips didn’t falter at the use of her real name, only squeezing you tighter.
“Te amo, Solstråle.” She said back. For once, you believed it. When you pulled away from the hug, it was to see Mapi looking smugly at your sister. “INGRID I DEFINITELY WON.”
Ingrid rolled her eyes. “She hasn’t even opened my present yet.”
“Still. I won.” Mapi smirked.
Now it was Ingrid’s turn to hand you your gift. It was wrapped in the same paper, and you tore it off, almost cautiously, not quite sure what Ingrid would have gotten you.
You were, once again, speechless at what you saw. This time, your eyes filled with tears immediately. Ingrid wasn’t as excited as Mapi had been, instead looking at you anxiously.
It was a painting of a waterfall back home not far from your house. It was so distinct, you knew Ingrid must have paid a ridiculous amount of money to get someone to hand paint it. Each individual stroke was so precise, blending perfectly into the image it was supposed to be, but if you focused hard, you could pick out the greens and greys and blues and whites that you’d grown up with.
It felt like home. It felt comforting. You could almost smell the trees, feel the cool sting of wind on your cheeks. It was a little piece of home just for you, and it was perfect. So beautiful and artistic that you weren’t sure you were worthy of it, but you looked at it in awe nonetheless. You wiped at your cheeks, not able to control the tidal wave of emotion washing over you.
“Kjære? Is it okay?” Ingrid asked anxiously, her eyes searching your face, trying to figure out if these were good tears or bad tears.
You let out an incredulous laugh. “Okay? Ingrid… it’s the most perfect thing I’ve ever seen in my life. It’s… perfect. Thank you.” You said, turning to her with a look of complete shock. And even though it pained Ingrid that you were so surprised to receive a nice gift for your birthday, she pushed that feeling down. Instead, she pulled you in towards her, placing the frame on the counter so she could hug you properly. You were happy with it, now, and that was all Ingrid had control over.
After a few seconds, Ingrid moved to pull away and break the hug, but you kept your arms wrapped around her, not quite ready to let go yet. Maybe it was the homesickness, or maybe it was your sister making you feel so known, and so loved. Whatever the reason, you just wanted her near you for a minute more, holding you nice and tight and safe against her.
“I love you,” she whispered, hearing you mumble the words back, your voice thick with emotion. When you did pull away, a minute later, it was to wipe at your face in an almost embarrassed manner.
Seeing how desperate you were for the attention to be off your tears, Mapi spoke up, her voice light and easy. “You can put them up in your room, you don’t have anything on the walls.”
You looked at the ground, then, almost sheepishly. “I didn’t know I could put anything up on them.” You admitted.
The room fell quiet, but even though you could tell that what you said had hurt Ingrid and Mapi, they just shook their heads softly. “It’s your room, for good, you can do whatever you want to it.” Ingrid told you.
You were about to thank her, and try to move the conversation long when Mapi let out a dramatic gasp. Both you and Ingrid whipped your heads to look at her, confused at the mischievous grin on her face.
“Ikea. WE CAN GO TO IKEA AND GET FURNITURE FOR SOLSTRÅLE’S ROOM.”
“María, calm down. Maybe she doesn’t want to redo her room.” Ingrid looked at you hopefully, and you knew it had nothing to do with your room, and everything to do with her not wanting to take Mapi to ikea.
You simply smirked back at Ingrid, who sighed and shut her eyes for a minute.
“Okay. Ikea.” She said finally. You and Mapi cheered, comically loudly, completely ignoring the rules she was setting in favor of high fiving each other and going to get ready to leave. “María, you are not building anything. Solstråle does not need her bed to collapse under her in the middle of the night. And kjære, please, please, don’t let Mapi talk you into a loft bed, you’ll fall off of it and break your arm. Amor? Kjære? ARE EITHER OF YOU LISTENING!” Ingrid shouted after you, rolling her eyes at the chants of ikea echoing around the house.
Mapi in Ikea was a handful. You, too, were a handful at the store. Together? She was going to lose one of you, she was sure of it. It had been a long day already. And it was only set to get longer.
--------
fluffy engen-león family trying to put furniture together in the next part?
yes, that IS all i have to say about this chapter thank you for your time.
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forgotten about you
barça femeni x teen!reader
request: here
A/N: i just know alexia turned off the tv during the game 😭
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You wake up, today is what could be described as a neutral day but it’s still your birthday nonetheless. You didn’t want to leave your bed, but you had to. Your family never really celebrated your birthday, only really caring about your brother and his dreams.
Even if it wasn’t the best day for you, a small part of your mind hoped that someone would wish you a happy birthday, at least Alexia anyways. It’s not like you told them though, the Barça instagram page would probably announce it.
You go through your regular movements of the day, traffic is light and you make it just in time.
Walking through, the admin wishes you a happy birthday, you smile lightly saying thanks and continuing to walk into the change room. However when you’re there it’s the same as any old day, it breaks your heart a little but you wouldn’t tell anyone that.
You’re quieter than usual walking to your cubby, it isn’t much of a change considering you’ve been one of the quieter ones since you joined barca, preferring to only be loud late at night when blasting music in your car.
It’s when even Alexia comes in and doesn’t say Happy Birthday that you feel even more hurt than before, out of everyone who would know, you’d just hoped she would. It’s not her fault though, you didn’t tell anyone. Why would she?
Training seems to be a blur, you miss the looks your older teammates give you at certain points. You’ve essentially become someone with no emotions which has somehow made you have a great session. Which in all honesty did not mend your shattering heart, no matter the praises the coaches had given you.
You make an effort to miss everyone after training and head straight home, you didn’t shower and just got up and left ignoring your confused teammates. No matter how much of an introvert you were, you’d always make time to say goodbye. It was a sign to everyone else that something had happened.
You make way to your car and drive off straight away, inevitably you end up sobbing halfway through. Unable to keep your emotions inside.
- - - - -
In the locker room, when you were gone there was silence. A pondering in the air of sorts. Mapi breaks it.
“Is she ok? She’s usually quiet but this… she’d at least say something.” Her statement lingers in the air, no one knowing what to say.
“Oh shit.” The unmistakable voice of Lucy Bronze cuts through the tension.
“Qué?” Many voices say at once. Lucy turns her phone around and shows the birthday announcement from the Barcelona Instagram page.
“How did we not know? Why didn’t she say anything?” Alexia sounds heartbroken, she cares for you deeply and to miss something so important is heartbreaking.
“I’m not sure.” Ingrid’s voice cracks and it looks like she’s about to cry.
Alexia is quick to regain her composure.
“Ok, we messed up. But, we can make this right. In the time I go to her house, talk and get her to come out, you all should do something. Plan a party and we’ll be there in like 1-2 hours. Got it?” The girls nod, seemingly ready to organise something not too big but enough to make up for what they didn’t know.
“Ingrid do you want to come with me?” The captain asks the Norwegian who nods, saying farewell to her girlfriend and teammates. You were very close with her, she took you under her wing a lot and you looked up to her.
- - - - -
You’re crying on your couch when there’s a knock on the door, thinking it’s preachers you ignore it, hoping they’ll leave. Only, the noise gets louder so you wipe your tears and trudge slowly toward the door.
Upon opening, Alexia and Ingrid immediately wrap you in a bone-crushing hug.
“What’s this for?” You say, you thought they’d forgotten about you.
“Don’t act like you don’t know, we’re sorry we didn’t know it was your birthday. We’ll make it up to you.” At Alexia’s words you start crying again.
“No Ale, it’s fine. I shouldn’t have expected anything. I didn’t tell you guys.” You say, feeling slightly bad.
“Elskling, no matter what we should’ve known, were your teammates and we didn’t even do any digging to find it. We made no effort before when we should have. Don’t ever feel like you should dismiss it. It obviously means something.” At her rant, you seem to understand her words as they compute in your mind.
“We did bring you something though nena. One from me and one from Mapi and Ingrid. Then we are going for a drive, ok?” You nod gratefully and get ready for what the two are giving you.
“Here you go.” Ingrid is first, she gives you two small boxes. You open the first one and it’s the Miss Dior perfume you’ve wanted for ages but haven’t ended up getting because you were too busy.
“I- thanks Ingrid.” You beam, she smiles softly back and points to the other one, you open it up carefully revealing a Dior charms bracelet. Your mouth opens wide.
“This is… thank you so much!” You place it down wrapping Ingrid in a hug.
“I’m glad you like it, I heard you said Dior was your favourite designer so I just figured.” It seems your broken heart from before was sealing up because she remembered something you’d told her weeks ago.
Alexia watches the interaction, smiling and happy to see you happy. Not the shell of a person you were at training because they forgot.
Luckily for her and Ingrid, there was a mall on the way to your house with many shops which would definitely satisfy what they needed to get you.
After speaking to Ingrid, you turn to Alexia who is also grinning and hands you a box.
“Aquí.”
You unwrap it, it’s quite big and heavy. When seeing the contents your eyes widen.
“Is this…” She nods her head, smirking. It’s a PS5, Alexia had been pretty strict on no video game consoles considering she wanted you to have a healthy sleep schedule.
“I didn’t think you’d ever allow it- Thank you Ale.” You bring her into a hug before unwrapping it fully and staring at the three things you had received in awe.
“Come on, get dressed we have places to be.” Alexia pulls you from your staring, you get dressed pretty quickly and you’re out of the house in 15 minutes.
- - - - -
You arrived at Patri’s house a little later and walked inside. The rest of the team were there, balloons everywhere and most importantly a cake with 19 on it being brought over by Frido.
Everyone’s singing and your face heats up at all the attention, feeling warm because of the love you’re receiving at the current moment.
When the singing dies down the Swede whispers to you softly.
“Make a good wish kid, it’ll be great.” You nod blowing out the candles and get given a knife to cut down the middle. It’s a pretty plain cake, but if you’re going to be honest you always loved when cakes weren’t so detailed.
The rest of the evening went by in bliss, people apologising and overall having a great time. Yes, they might’ve forgotten. But, they knew their mistake and made this the best birthday you’d ever had.
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Finally wrote this.. I took too long to write it i’m sorry anon
can you tell what designer i like? (miss dior smells so good i feel rich when wearing it)
anyways i literally need to stop eating original kebab, like it’s so good and taking too much of my money PLEASE
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sweet
aitana bonmati x f!reader
summary: in which your girlfriend cant help but make your secret relationship painfully obvious while giving you heart eyes throughout a training session and her jealousy in el clasico.
you and aitana had been together for around two and a half years now, meeting at the arsenal vs barcelona game where you managed to score a goal after getting past the brunette midfielder, she was impressed and came up to you after the game for a shirt swap.
later that night, you were surprised when the catalan also followed you, you were quick to follow her back and send a simple ‘hola’ to her, who engaged in a conversation with you immediately.
after messaging for a while and meeting up a few times, flying to each others countries, and multiple dates, the brunette asked you to be her girlfriend.
at first you were both afraid of the long distance, however you both managed and comforted each other after spain being knocked out of the euros, and englands loss at the world cup.
your and aitanas relationship was very strong, and although you had your arguments, you both made sure to never go to sleep angry with each other.
the relationship was never meant to be a secret, but with you two being in separate countries and playing for different teams, it made it hard for the two of you to be spotted with each other.
you were a great midfielder, you put a lot of effort in at training, constantly trying to better yourself. equally, with your girlfriend being one of the greatest female footballers in the world right now, and her also loving to watch your matches, she usually helped you with your match analysis, and told you what you could work on.
these were main reasons why you had ended up on barcelonas radar, your contract with arsenal was coming to an end, it was a great team and you had made so many special memories there, but you knew that you needed a change.
you had secretly been wanting to put an end to the long distance, and although she hadnt voiced it, you knew your girlfriend did too.
so when you and your manager were looking at potential new teams, and he mentioned barcelona, you took an interest in the blue and red team straight away.
the process of changing teams was daunting, there were many ups and downs and times that it looked like the contract would fall through.
as much as you wanted to confide in your loving girlfriend, who would no doubt put in a good word for you, which would make the process so much easier, you wanted to suprise her.
when you broke the news to your current teammates, they were sad but also happy for you, you deserved this and they knew it was a massive opportunity that would no doubt make you a better player.
you flew over to barcelona to finalise the signing of your contract and went through the media process of photos and little interviews for their channels.
however, in your hurry to not miss your flight, you forgot to tell them that you were surprising people that you knew from the squad with your new arrival.
you were at home packing your belongings ready for the flight next morning when barcelona had an afternoon training session, in your defense you had no idea that the barcelona media team were going to do a photodump with your new photos, and release all of the videos.
after seeing barcelona release their content of you, arsenal media team also released all of their goodbye content for you.
these sudden events combined with the fact no one suspected barcelona were interested in you, and that you were quite well known to people due to your multiple media involvements with englands youtube account and being named player of the tournament after winning the euros, left you somehow trending on twitter.
———
as much as lucy liked to believe she had accustomed to spains heat, she was yet to admit that she needed a lot more drink breaks than her teammates that were brought up in the spanish sun.
so when she was getting her drink, she couldnt help but notice the frequent notifications coming from her phone, usually this only happened it there was a major event going on so it immediately grasped her interest.
keira had also decided to have a break, seeing as lucy was also having one it meant she wouldnt be made fun of for her intolerance of the warm conditions by the english defender.
however when she walked over to lucy, she couldnt help but notice the older woman staring at her phone in complete shock, the midfielder knew it took a lot to shock lucy, so straight away she asked her what happened.
“y/n is coming”
“oh to spain? she visits often, why are you so shocked?” keira teased at the brunette.
“no to barcelona!” lucy retorted.
“yes lucy, barcelona, spain, same thing, either way she comes to visit us, is the heat getting to you that much?”
“kei- no!” lucy said exasperatedly, “shes moving from arsenal!”
“what?! let me see!” however keira did not leave room for arguments, as she was quick to grab lucys phone out of her hands and see the flurry of posts that lucy had been tagged in asking for her opinion of the move.
the rest of the team had also been sent for a drink break, signifying the end of training, so aitana was quick to run and jump on her bestfriends back, ready to make fun of her for having to finish early.
however to her dismay, keira was quick to shove her off, “one second aita!”
“what so a phone is more important than me” as she huffed in fake annoyance.
to everyones suprise, keira seemingly ignored aitana, and instead turned to lucy “i still cant believe it, i had no idea they were interested in her!”
“well she is pretty good, she will strengthen our midfield even more”
most of the team were confused now, with ona questioning “who? is someone joining the team?”
lucy answered her “yeah, y/n? if you remember at the manchester derby, she played for city when you were at united i think?”
“ohh yeah, i remember! very good, she is good!” ona replied.
whilst the rest of the team all talked about your future arrival, aitana walked back to the changing room silent, keira was shocked by her bestfriends unusual silence, and mistook her shock for sadness.
“dont worry aita, your still my number 1, okay? i will probably partner with her for the first few sessions as she will be new to everyone and the language, but inly until she makes new friends!”
hearing that keira planned on partnering with you managed to wake aitana from her daze, and the catalan was quick to dismiss keiras words “no, no keira, i can partner with her! if you dont mind that is, we can then get used to each others playing, right?”
amusement was evident all over keiras face, aitanas rambling showed a small crush on keiras fellow lioness “if you insist aita”.
———
the barcelona media team decided to document your first training session, your arrival resulted in many new followers for the team, with many english fans asking for content of you with the team.
as promised, aitana partnered with you in everything, she was still not over the fact that you were actually here.
her reaction a few days ago of seeing you standing sheepishly at her door the next morning of the training session with all your suitcases was memorable, and it felt as if you two were still in the honeymoon stage of your relationship despite being together for over 2 years.
you two planned on letting the team find out about your relationship when they realised, however aitana seemed to be making it very easy for them with the constant heart eyes she had been giving you this training session, it not helping that the whole world could see it if they just clicked on barcelonas channel.
she had already been hit on the head with the ball twice this session for not paying attention, and couldnt manage to keep possession of the ball when she saw you laughing with keira and lucy.
that was until you noticed your girlfriends flustered state as you were put on the same team in a mini match and quickly whispered to her “come on tana, focus okay? just like we practiced” you knew if she carried on like this, she may not be put in the starting 11 for el clasico.
aitana only nodded at your words and tried to focus, which payed off as she wouldnt be surprised if that was the best she had ever played, the rest of the team and even the coaches were impressed with you two, resulting in you both being chosen for the starting 11 for el clasico.
sadly, just like keira, the rest of the team mistook your relationship for aitana having a crush on you, and many of the players wanted to speed up the process of you two getting together.
pina and patri decided to do this at a very bad time: the day before el clasico.
it was a simple white lie they told to aitana that misa rodriguez planned on asking for your number after the game, and the true purpose of telling her was so that she could ask you out before the match.
obviously that wouldnt happen as aitana was going home to you that night, however when you noticed her grumpy state and asked her about it, the midfielder only brushed you off saying she was tired.
you narrowed it down to being nervous, although you had no idea why, due to barcelonas constant winning streak you knew that real madrid didnt stand a chance.
you knew she wasnt angry at you when that night she was quick to wrap her arms round your waist when you slipped into bed with her, and she tiredly mumbled “t’estimo” into your ear, and kissed your cheek.
———
when you woke up, aitana was not next to you. confused, you made your way downstairs to see your girlfriend doing match analysis.
“aita, although match analysis is important, your sleep is more important for a good game, okay?” you said whilst rubbing her shoulders.
she only nodded in response, and from then on she was distant whilst getting ready and all the way up until you were about to go through the tunnel to begin the match.
you decided that you had enough, and quickly grabbed her hands to confront her about her unusual behaviour, “have i upset you tana, why are you ignoring me?” you questioned warily, not wanting to upset the brunette even more.
seeing you look so small in front of her, unknowing if you had upset her pulled on aitanas heartstrings, and a wave if guilt washed over her, she hadnt realised that her jealousy had also affected you already.
she was quick to reassure you that you had done nothing wrong, with a quick peck to your lips and a whispered “te amo” you felt better going into the match knowing you and your girlfriend were on good terms.
so far the match was going well, just before the whistle for half time barcelona were already two nil over madrid, to your surprise both goals were courtesy of your girlfriend who you knew much preferred assisting a goal than scoring.
barcelona had been awarded a corner, and as you made your way in to the box, you felt a familiar pair of hands grab at your waist, and a whispered “your playing so well” you hoped the growing red blush to your cheeks were mistook as evidence of you running round the pitch for almost 45 minutes.
as alexia kicked the ball, you noticed it coming straight in front of you, however as you tried to run into the ball to try shoot, it seemed misa had dived at the same time, successfully grabbing the ball, but also managing to flip you over her too.
aitana saw red when she saw you laying on the floor, with misa towering over you and offering you a hand. she shoved her national teammate out of the way, and bent down to check if you were okay, before helping you up and giving you an encouraging pat on the back as she spoke in your ear “lets get you a goal, okay bebita?”
however, she gave you no chance to reply as she had already sprinted to keira after hearing the whistle for half time, this seemed to have been the wring thing to do though, as pina and patri went up to her and teased her about leaving her girl alone. aitana only rolled her eyes, until pina shrieked “aita! shes actually doing it! misa is talking to y/n!”
aitana turned around so fast, the girls wouldnt be surprised if she gave herself whiplash, however they werent able to make fun of her for it as aitana had already started running back to you with a scowl on her face.
misa had innocently come up to you after aitana left to apologise for knocking you over, you hastily brushed off her apology and said you would get your revenge on her by scoring, which made the taller girl chuckle and wrap an arm around your shoulders.
this action only made your girlfriend run faster, to grab your arm and pull you away, shouting to misa that you were needed in the locker room.
you raised your eyebrow at your girlfriends antics, and she defended herself quickly “she shouldnt be touching you like that amor!”
“she was only apologising tana!”
aitana only huffed and began to walk away, before realising that leaving you alone was the wrong thing to do, and turned around to grab your arm and drag you into the locker room.
as soon as you both entered, aitana took to ignoring you again, at this point you realised that she had been jealous, and you had already formulated a plan to add fuel to the fire.
as she promised, aitana assisted you of a goal, and scored two more of her own, however only you, pina, and patri knew about the true reason of her assault on misas ego today.
as the whistle went for full time, many of your teammates including aitana went to celebrate, you however went with patri to console misa, who was extremely irritated by the 5 goals she had let in.
to patris amusement, you also requested to swap shirts with the goalkeeper, who agreed and also pulled you into a hug.
your girlfriend only wanted to celebrate the win with you, who was currently no where to be seen, but hearing patri shout pina caught the catalans attention, quickly glancing over where patri was, she was meg with a sight that made her want to kick a ball straight at misas face.
you, in misas jersey, with misas arms wrapped around your torso, and misas stupid voice whispering in your ear.
once again, aitana scolded herself internally for leaving you alone, and sprinted over to you, picked you up out of misas grasp and carried you back to the group.
“i hate this jersey on you mi amor!” aitana pouted.
“what? i love it, and look at the back!” you exclaimed playfully, as you turned around to reveal misas name on your back, making aitana groan in annoyance, much to your teammates amusement.
aitanas impulses got the better of her, as she quickly manhandled the jersey off you, took of hers and put that on you instead “much better, i like it more than the madrid one, dont you bebita?” aitana asked teasingly, and you couldnt help but laugh at her jealousy.
“seeing as everyone can already see you with my name on your back, im sure they have already figured it out, right amor?” the brunette questioned, a daring smile on her face as she glanced at your lips.
“aita- i dont know, everyone can see!”
“let them” she whispered as she pulled you in for a bruising kiss, only pulling away when you were both desperate for air.
except as you broke apart, you werent sure if it was to reveal your relationship to the world. or to prove to a certain goalkeeper, who had coincidentally been standing behind you when aitana kissed you, who you belonged to.
either way, you suffered the consequences of aitanas actions on the bus home, when you were subjected to your teammates teasing, and much to your annoyance aitana had seemed to get out of the situation unscathed.
either way, the internet was definitely going crazy.
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barcaupdates
liked by user1, user2 and 16,597 others
aitana bonmati and y/n y/ln kissed after the el clasico 5-0 win against ream madrid, and aitana was seen switching the ‘misa’ jersey y/n wore for hers
comments:
user1: a bit of a coincidence that aitana kissed in front of misa right??
user2: did anyone else pina and patri laughing in the backgroud??
user3: they are such a cute couple, and so good in midfield today, aitana scoring 4 goals is crazy!
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