#batfamily headcannons

[arkangelo-7]

I bet the JL has a “how fucked are we” metric that’s literally just how many of Bruce’s kids are there.

Like if he pulls up to the alien invasion or whatever with just Robin, then everything’s fine. More than fine, actually, because Bruce feels comfortable enough to bring his eight year old along for the ride. This battle will take approximately fifteen minutes and they’ll all get shawarma after. Not fucked in the slightest.

But if Red Robin shows up too… hmm, okay, this is getting somewhat serious. Tim is one of Bruce’s most trusted partners; he’s the smart Robin, the tactician, the loyal one, and so if Batman brought him along then it means he’s at least a little bit worried about shit hitting the fan and wants one his advisors around. But the combined brain power of Bruce and Tim is pretty much unmatched (DC plot armor for the win), so everything will be fine, basically. Superman might take a hit, but everything’s going to be fine. Just keep calm and you’ll all make it home in time to Door Dash some Panda Express before it closes. So not that fucked.

It starts to get serious after that. When Signal and Spoiler roll up the scene, shit has definitely hit the fan. Batman’s worried enough to call in reinforcements and he’s probably doubting the League’s ability to listen/obey his orders, so he needs a backup plan in case things go really south. But with Signal’s abilities and Steph’s superpower of turning anything into a joke, chances are you’ll be okay. Maybe impaled or something, but okay. But still, fucked.

When Nightwing shows, the JL knows it’s starting to get dicey out on the field. See, Nightwing’s got his own team, his own issues—the fact that he set that all aside to help out his dad is cause for concern. On a scale from 1-10, they are at a 7. Above moderately fucked.

And… oh God. Black Bat? Most of the time the JL doesn’t even see her, but once she makes herself known and starts fighting alongside her siblings, they all start to silently freak out. Black Bat is a fucking machine and if she’s breaking a sweat trying to fight the Big Bad, things are definitely not going to go well. They start praying that Batman figures something out. They freak out. They are intrinsically fucked.

But God Forbid you catch sight of the Red Hood. The prodigal son is a legitimate killer, and if Batman’s letting him blow out brains then the JL knows he’s desperate. And a desperate Batman is not good. At all. They are definitely fucked.

[ffaelix]

bruce wayne absolutely keeps every single drawing, card, and handmade gift his kids have ever given him. like, every single one. no matter how messy, weird, or even accidentally insulting (looking at you, jason’s “world’s okayest dad” mug from when he was thirteen), he keeps them all.

he has a drawer in his desk with the “important” ones—like the first time dick called him dad in a scribbled crayon card, or the weird but endearing origami bat tim made when he was sleep-deprived.

but the real collection? it’s in a reinforced, locked safe in the batcave.

alfred found out once when he caught bruce carefully putting away a pile of random childhood drawings. when asked why he had an entire safe dedicated to them, bruce just muttered something about “sentimental value” and refused to elaborate.

but really, he just can’t bear to part with them. his kids may not always say it, but those little gifts? they were proof that, in their own way, they loved him. and no matter how much time passed, no matter how rocky their relationships got, he never wanted to forget that.

..

years later, damian finds the safe.

he’s not even trying to snoop—he was looking for something important, something mission-critical, and instead, he finds this. a locked safe, hidden behind a shelf in the batcave, coded with one of bruce’s personal encryptions. naturally, he assumes it holds classified files, maybe contingency plans, or something worthy of all the security.

he hacks it in under five minutes.

when the door swings open, damian stares.

it’s not secret mission files. it’s not weapons or emergency cash. it’s… drawings? old birthday cards? a lopsided clay model of a bat (which he immediately recognizes as drake’s terrible handiwork)?

his eyes narrow as he pulls out a faded crayon drawing—one of his, from when he was younger. it’s him, a wobbly little stick figure, standing next to bruce in an oversized bat symbol. he vaguely remembers making it, but he definitely doesn’t remember bruce keeping it.

“tt.” he huffs, shoving it back in the safe. ridiculous. sentimental. pointless.

and yet…

when bruce walks into the cave later that night, he finds the safe locked again, nothing out of place—except for one new addition. a freshly drawn sketch, carefully folded and placed on top of the pile.

it’s of the whole family. him, grayson, todd, drake, cain—everyone. standing together.

bruce doesn’t say anything about it.

but the next morning, damian notices that his drawing isn’t in the safe anymore. it’s framed on bruce’s desk.

[arandomao3user]

Felt bored, here's my projecting health issues onto the Batfam again:

Alfred, setting down a pharmacy bag, inhaling sharply: COME GET YOUR DRUGS!

Bruce, dragging himself in:

Tim, slowly looking up from his phone with a dead eyed expression: If it isn't a monster energy drink and seventeen caffeine pills I no no want it.

Cass: I am not on drugs?

Dick: It's our prescriptions, Cass.

Jason: You people are the reason I carry narcan around.

Alfred: You're all on enough prescriptions to fill a pharmacy. Now, let's begin...

Alfred, raising a pill bottle: Pain medication for Master Bruce for the back pain Bane inflicted on him from his wonderful career choices! Unfortunately we don't have the several other medications he should be taking for his mental state...

Bruce: Alfred, please...

Alfred, raising another two pill bottles: Anti-inflammatory and pain medication for Master Dick for his hypermobility he refuses to see a doctor for.

Dick, taking the pills: It's not that painful, Alfie, it's just my bones being slackers :D

Alfred: Master Jason's anti psychotics for the psychosis caused by the Lazarus Pit.

Jason: My therapist is less concerned than last week!

Alfred: Wonderful news, Master Jason... Master Tim, your sleeping pills and anemia medication.

Tim, slowly standing before promptly passing out because POTS sucks:

Alfred, sighing: Somebody please see to it that Master Timothy did not receive another concussion.

Alfred: Master Dick, your ADHD medication.

Dick: I forgot I take these.

Alfred: We know, master Dick.

Bruce, inspecting Tim: Have I failed as a Father?

Alfred: No more than I have. Now, Miss Cassandra, your anxiety medication.

Cass: Thank you, Alfred.

Alfred: You are most welcome, dear. Damian, your allergy pills since you insist on surrounding yourself with farm animals.

Damian: Tt, a runny nose and itchy eyes are a small price to pay for love, Pennyworth.

Alfred: Bipolar medication for Miss Stephanie.

Stephanie: Do you need to announce what the pills are for..?

Alfred: Master Bruce keeps all your information stored on a supercomputer anyone can look at if they guess his password, which is just Master Dick's birthday—

Jason: WHAT!? IT USED TO BE MINE!

Cass: Hurt.

Stephanie: Utter betrayal.

Dick: Wait really??

Bruce: Hrn...

Alfred: And Master Jason's inhaler.

Jason: Wish I had this when I was inhaling all that smoke and died from an asthma attack!

Dick: . . . WHAT!?

Cass: You what?

Jason: B never told you? Yeah, it wasn't the bomb or crowbar that did it, it was the smoke.

Jason: Haha.

Jason: My inhaler broke from the impact.

Jason: I spent my final moments suffocating.

Jason: I died painfully.

Bruce: Hrn...

Tim, slowly coming back to consciousness: Did I die?

Alfred: And Master Tim's testerone.

Tim: Nice. Dick drugs.

Alfred: . . . And birth control.

Tim: Yay, de-baby-nators.

Bruce, sighing: I have failed as a Father...

Jason: Wait, why doesn't Duke have to take medication?

Duke: I do, I just pick it up myself so I don't have to be put through this embarrassment.

Bruce: Are we done here?

Alfred: Yes, thank you for allowing me my weekly enjoyment of having the family in one place and admitting you're all deeply troubled.

Alfred: Good day.

—

[parker-artio]

Me and my siblings are playing clue rn and I can only imagine how fucking insane it is in a house of detectives.

(We only own different variants, right now we’re playing the Disney villain versions.)

Dick: Stop accusing me of murder!

Jason: NEVER!

Damian: it’s not professor Plum Todd, you know this, yet you still accuse him every time

Jason: THATS because that’s who dick is playing as.

Duke to himself: it’s gotta be Miss scarlet…

Steph who has Miss scarlet and hasn’t show it to anyone: hehe it’s Colonel Mustard… huh, what a funky little name

Tim who looked at Steph card and cheated the second it’s his turn: it’s Colonel Mustard with the revolver in the study…

Tim checks: HA! I won you all suck ass!

*cue screaming and physically attacking one another*

Cass who was the only one Steph let look at her card: fuck you tim.

[zephyr-ro-emenki]

Random Batfam Headcanon's #24: (The Revival)

The Batgirls (alongside Ivy and Harley) have a group chat. And Jason is the only Boy Among them. And the reason he's among them, is that his Pit Rage episodes have begun syncing up with the rest of the females Menstrual Cycle. You heard me right.

Jason Todd has Pit Rage Periods.

_______________________________________________

Jason: "How do you deal with all of the ever growing stress and rage inside you during your menstrual cycle?"

Harley: "Murder!"

Steph: "Myrder."

Cass: "Assault."

Ivy: "Murder."

Kate: "Murder."

Helena: "Murder."

Selina: "Theft and Murder."

Babs: "Homicide."

Jason: "I've found my people."

[pidgeeepombo]

No but that is so batman & robin coded😭😭😭😭😭

[qcomicsy]

I am in my angst today so I'm going to drop a few of ansty Batfam headcannons.

- Bruce till this day do that father thing of open the door of his kids room to see if they're sleeping and then closing (even when they're just visiting).

- The first time he did that to Tim, Tim pretended to be asleep and then he just started sobbing because Jack used to do the same thing too, and his mother before him.

- Dick, when he moved out of the manor, still would use the Batcomputer to do research from time to time. Everytime he slept on from tiredness he would woke up with Batman's cape on his shoulders.

- No one knows Bruce has a good singing voice other than Dick and Jason because he would sing to their sleep, sometimes, when they had nightmares.

- He stopped singing when Jason died. The only person who was able to hear him sing again was Damian. He pretended to be asleep, because if he opened his eyes he would noticed how much he misses his mother.

- Jason singed to Damian sleep once at the league. None of them remember that.

- Damian tries constantly to assure himself that he could take down every member of his family if he needed to. Deep down he knows he can't.

- Bruce spent weeks trying to master how to cut someone's hair ( with Alfred's help ) so he could give Dick a haircut, because Dick said to him that his mother used to cut his hair.

- Bruce taught every single one of his sons how to shave their beard.

- Bruce had a mental breakdown once because he was starting to forget his mother's face.

- Cass overanalyze everyone's body language to see if they're healthy and happy. She tries to stop herself sometimes because more often the answer is no.

- Sometimes Tim flinches when Jason moves to fast near him. They never talked about that out loud.

- Sometimes Damian's hand tremble when he grabs his sword, he can still feel the blade.

- In one of Dick's worst fights with Redhood the moment he got home he threw up. His brother's eyes used to be blue like his and not green.

- There was a time where Jason was so happy that Bruce's blue eyes were the same shade of his.

- Bruce's hands still tremble when he sees his children on the battlefield.

- Bruce has a habit of messing with his children's hair, every single one of them picked the same habit after him.

- When Dick moved out to the Titans Bruce couldn't sleep for weeks.

- Jason avoids to change clothes in front of his brothers because of the face Dick made when he saw his autopsy scars for the first time.

- One time Jason had a panic attack and misdialed Tim's number, Tim stayed on the line until Jason managed to sleep.

- There's times where Bruce says the word Robin and all of them look at him.

[teapartiesandfandom]

anyways I feel like if any of the batkids should kill the joker, it should be Duke. I think that Duke is the kind of person to feel bad for kill but not who he killed if that makes sense. He wouldn't do it on purpose but say joker cornered him. He refuses to let his family, either of them, loose yet another person to this monster.

[gothamsmom]

Dick Grayson: The Unassuming Supermodel

Okay, let’s be real for a second—Dick Grayson is ridiculously good-looking. Like, impossibly so. He’s got that whole "smiling golden boy with the perfect jawline and piercing blue eyes" vibe that makes everyone in Gotham swoon. It’s only natural that at some point, someone would want to put him in front of a camera. And so, at some point in his life, Dick Grayson probably worked as a model.

Now, this isn’t something Dick ever talks about. Ever. He doesn't bring it up around the family because, in his mind, it’s just something everyone does. You know, like a rite of passage. “Oh, I had a couple of modeling gigs back in the day,” he’d casually say, with a shrug, as if being a literal Vogue cover boy isn’t a big deal. It’s just Dick being Dick, the golden retriever of the Batfamily, casually brushing off the fact that he has probably appeared in ads for everything from high-end fashion to extremely unnecessary cologne brands.

But the thing is—he was good at it. He’s a performer by nature, and being in front of a camera? That’s like second nature to him. When you have the smile that could literally melt hearts and the charm to match, you don’t really need to do much extra work to make people fall in love with you. The camera loves him. So it’s absolutely not a stretch that he could have been plucked out of a crowd to be a model.

It was probably some agent who just saw him one day—walking around Gotham, being too handsome for his own good—and thought, "That’s the face we need." And Dick, ever the people-pleaser with a “sure, why not?” attitude, agreed. So he ended up doing a few runway shows, a couple of photoshoots, and maybe even starred in some ad campaigns. And in true Dick fashion, he never made a big deal about it. He just went on with his life, like, "Yeah, I used to be a model... so what?"

Then one day, Jason Todd, the brooding, angry, and absolutely not fashion-savvy younger brother, ends up borrowing a random Vogue magazine from his library buddy (don't ask why, because he definitely only started reading it for the articles about tactical gear and undercover missions, but hey, Mildred did recommend the fashion section). He’s flipping through the glossy pages, trying to figure out why in the world this magazine is so ridiculously expensive, when—wait a second—he sees a familiar face.

Jason (frozen, eyes wide): “No. No way. What the hell?”

There, in a full-page spread, was a picture of Dick Grayson—smiling effortlessly, his hair swept back, wearing a ridiculously expensive designer outfit, looking like he had just walked out of a dream. He’s striking a pose on some exotic beach, surrounded by high-end fashion, and Jason, well, Jason feels like the ground has just been ripped out from under him.

He immediately slams the magazine shut. His mind is racing. Is that… is that Dick?

Jason (absolutely stunned): “What the hell? No. NO. No way. This can’t be him. He—he’s a model??”

A few minutes later, he finds himself stomping straight into Dick’s room, magazine in hand, demanding answers. Dick looks up at him, perfectly calm, like nothing’s the slightest bit weird about this whole thing.

Jason (holding up the magazine, practically yelling): “You—YOU—were a model??!!”

Dick (casually leaning back in his chair): “Huh? Oh. Yeah. Why?”

Jason (frozen, staring at him like he’s just seen a ghost): “WHY didn’t you—WHAT?!”

Dick (shrugging, unfazed): “I dunno. It was just a thing I did. Everyone does something like that at some point, right? You’ve probably got some weird hobby you did before you joined the Batfamily.”

Jason (shaking the magazine like it’s some sort of revelation): “But you’re—you're in VOGUE, Dick! VOGUE! Do you know how big that is?!”

Dick (totally calm, casually picking up his phone like it's no big deal): “Yeah, I think I remember that shoot. I had a good time. Nice people. Nice clothes. What’s the big deal?”

Jason (staring at him like he’s lost his mind): “You were a model, and you never thought to mention it?”

Dick (nonchalant, as if talking about the weather): “I mean, it’s in the past. It’s not like I’m still doing it. I don’t see the point in bringing it up. It was a couple of photoshoots. No need to make a fuss over it.”

Jason (rubbing his forehead, utterly flabbergasted): “I’m just... I’m just so confused right now.”

The Aftermath

From that point on, Jason can never look at Dick the same way again. Every time Dick walks into the room, Jason just stares at him in disbelief, like he’s somehow seeing his older brother for the first time.

And every now and then, when Jason is feeling particularly moodily dramatic, he’ll occasionally toss out some random comment about Dick’s “modeling career” and how he was probably the “world’s most perfect runway model.” Dick will just shrug it off with a grin, totally unbothered, because in Dick’s mind, it was just another chapter in his life that doesn’t need any extra attention.

But for Jason? The idea that Dick was a model—in Vogue, no less—will haunt him for the rest of his life.

Moral of the Story:

Dick Grayson, the reluctant supermodel, is the absolute last person you’d expect to be in front of the camera. He’s too casual, too breezy about it. Meanwhile, Jason, the brooding younger brother who can barely keep up with Gotham's chaotic fashion scene, is now burdened with the knowledge that his older brother was once the epitome of high-end fashion, effortlessly gracing the pages of magazines.

And Dick? He’ll keep living his life like it's no big deal. Because, hey, everyone’s been a model at some point, right?

[arkangelo-7]

Bruce seems like the type of dad who cannot for the life of him comprehend the idea of his children having sex lives. Like one of them will make a crude joke on patrol or something and Bruce will just… blue screen. Because there is no way someone did something like that to his precious baby???

[reggiebkack]

I need a fic where someone in the justice league calls out mom and Batman responds because he’s used too his childeren sometimes calling him that (preferably superbat fic)

[arandomao3user]

. . . F-#&# YOU!

*Makes AU where Alfred brings Julia Pennyworth over to raise alongside Bruce after the Wayne's died, but I don't know anything about Julia Pennyworth outside she has Daddy issues and mad skills.*

—

Look, I just think it'd be neat if they were the same age and Bruce and Julia grew up together as siblings and Alfred was a good Father to both of them and probably didn't get Bruce therapy but it's fine because he is a single Father of two—

Kid! Bruce: I will avenge my parents deaths when I am older...

Kid! Julia, promptly sticking her foot in his face as the less traumatized sibling: REVENGE MY FOOT!

Kid! Bruce: AAAAAALFRED!!!!!!!

—

Adult! Bruce, as Batman: I am vengeance, I am the night... I am—

Adult! Julia, as Bumble-Bat (chosen after the Bumblebee bat, the smallest bat breed, small like pennies, I don't know, someone think of a better name—): THE DORK KNIGHT! BOOTMAN!

Bruce: I literally hate you.

Julia, mocking: I literally hate you!

—

Bruce, showing up with Dick:

Julia, who stayed home from the circus sick: Dude.

Dick, pointing to a chandelier: Can I climb that?

—

Bruce in his teens left to begin training to become Batman while Julia focused on her studies, knowing someone had to keep their poor Father from having a hart attack while Bruce ran around the world training. Julia learnt how to use a gun and became skilled in computer hacking, she also is a master in stealth and can operate air crafts (look to canon skills, man...)

Julia later joined Bruce near the end of his training, surprising him by showing up and declaring she wanted to work alongside him and be a vigilante. Bruce was less than amused.

—

Dick was a total Father's boy, shut up, Dick was Bruce's annoyance, Jason however adopted by Bruce, was all his aunts child.

Julia: . . . Don't tell Bruce and I'll teach you to shoot one of the big guns.

Jason, gasping: REALLY!?

Julia: I did when I was your age, not a big deal.

Jason: YES!!!

—

Jason, knocking on Julia's door: Auuuunt Juliaaaaaaaaa, I need help with my math homework!

Julia: Ask your Dad!

Jason:

Jason: AUNT JULIAAAAAA!!!

—

Julia: My Dad let me have my first beer around your age.

Jason, thirteen: REALLY!?

Julia: Sure, why not?

Jason: YES!

*30 minutes later...*

Jason, head in a toilet bowl, crying:

Bruce: JULIA, WHAT IF HE HAS ALCOHOL POISONING!?

Julia: I DIDN'T THINK HE'D DRINK THAT MANY!

Bruce: HOW AM I GONNA EXPLAIN THIS TO HIS SOCIAL WORKER!?

Jason: I don't feel so good...

Julia: I mean, I owe you fifty bucks no?

Jason: Nice...

Bruce, wondering when he had to he the responsible one:

—

Julia: Why do you get all the Robin's? Maybe I want a Robin.

Bruce: No, he's mine.

Julia: Dad! Bruce isn't sharing his Robin's!

Bruce: He's my adopted son!

Julia: He's my adopted nephew!

Alfred: Children, please...

Jason: Would I have to go by Bee Bird if I was aunt Julia's sidekick?

Julia: That's actually cute—

Bruce: No, we aren't sharing.

Julia: Buzz kill. Total. Buzz kill.

Dick, from the background, snickering:

Bruce: PUN NOT INTENDED!

Julia: It was, actually.

—

Bumble Bat! Julia, kneeing a trafficker in between the legs:

Robin! Dick: That one probably stung!

Julia, giggling:

Bruce: Please, stop.

—

Julia, THE stealth Queen prior to Cass:

Tim, holding a camera:

Julia: Is it my turn for the sidekick distribution system?

Tim: I have... I have parents...

Julia: BATMAN, I GOT ONE!

*Tim was returned to his home but Julia never forgave Bruce for not letting her keep him*

—

After Jason's death

Julia, holding Bruce's hand and leaning on him while they stand in front of Jason's grave, holding an umbrella in her free hand as rain falls down on them: It wasn't your fault, B.

Bruce:

Julia: He knew we loved him.

Bruce: He didn't...

Julia: He did.

Bruce: What if he hated me? In those final moments, what if he hated me?

Julia: He didn't, Bruce, he didn't... He loved this family. He loved us, and we loved him, so much...

Bruce:

Bruce: I wanna stay out here for a while.

Julia: I have time.

—

Bruce, a week or so after his parents deaths, curled in a corner and refusing to eat:

Julia: Bruuuuuuucie, c'mon, it's dinner! You're gonna get sick if you don't eat.

Bruce: I don't care..

Julia: Well, I do.

Bruce: Well, I don't.

Julia:

Julia: Guess I get all Dad's cooking then! :D

Julia: AND dessert.

Bruce:

Bruce: But... But I want dessert...

Julia: Y'know Dad's rules! No dessert without supper.

Bruce: . . . Fine, but I'm only eating a little bit!

Julia: Fiiiine, picky.

—

After Jason dies Bruce is super from killing the Joker by Superman, but Bumble Bat had no issue with killing, she had no traumatic experiences, her parents were alive and well, and she doesn't hesitate to find the Joker and kill him five times over. Julia doesn't hesitate to rip off her cowl and scream for him to look at her, see her and see the face of the woman she took everything from, the man who hurt her family and HER brother, she doesn't hesitate to use the same crowbar to leave indents on the Joker's face, to leave him gurgling on his own blood and still drop to her knees to slam her fists into him till he's dead with no hopes of returning, and even then she screams into the night and begs for her nephew back...

—

Julia and Bruce have a brief falling out after he finds out she killed the Joker, him arguing they weren't judge, jury, and executioner and that it didn't do anything. Julia argued she wasn't trying to play either three rolls, but let Jason rest soundly in his grave... She ran off for a hot minute to train solo in various countries, eventually landing in Hong Kong, where she coincidently finds Cass and saves her from David Cain's idea of Fatherly love and trains her as her own side kick, Black Bat.

—

Julia returned home, once, briefly to make her disgust over Bruce training Tim clear, and again permanently when Jason is revealed to be alive and resenting Bruce for not being the one to avenge him. Julia rekindles her relationship with Bruce and Jason, though Jason and Bruce remain on rocky waters since Jason refuses to kill. Julia doesn't move back into the manor though, instead settling down in a penthouse with Cass to continue training her and being her Mother figure.

—

Cass and Jason both love Julia. Cass however doesn't agree with her morals, more so aligning with Bruce's, and loves Julia, but is THE petty cousin toward Jason.

—

I just think it's neat. (Feel free to add whatever you'd like to this AU, I am just obsessed with the idea of Julia being the happy sunshine sister with Bruce being the grumpy, sad brother and just. That dynamic.) (This AU is public domain, please, don't make me write it.) (Go crazy.) (Please don't flop and please like this idea as much as me.) (IT HAS POTENTIAL, MAN!!!)

—

[parker-artio]

What I think the BatKids favorite animated Movie is

Dick: Shrek. I think he’d like it. Like no elaboration. It just radiates Dick vibes. 🤷‍♂️

Cass: Hotel Transylvania. She likes Mavis.

Jason: Beowulf. He saw it and wanted to read the book, and it immediately kickstarted his enjoyment for books and reading.

Tim: Puss in Boots. He’s the type of kid to watch a movie about 100 times till he can recite it word by word.

Duke: I wanna put Sausage Party so bad- but for the sake of sticking to kids (and teen) movies let’s say Ice Age. My main reason I think he’d like it is because of the jokes and the history in it (kinda).

Damian: Into The Spiderverse. (idk if marvel doesn’t exist in the DC comics bc of the crossover) I fully believe he’d love it because of the art style and how it’s a teenager who had a secret identity too

[zephyr-ro-emenki]

Random Batfam Headcanon's #25:

Everyone hides things in the Batarang Budget.

And I mean Everyone.

You accidentally Dent the Batmobile while using it to go through the Drive thru at Batburger? Hide it in the Batarang Budget.

You ever accidentally order 5 metric tons of Jane Austin Books when you only wanted to order 5 copies for your book club? Hide it in the Batarang Budget.

Do you need a way to hide from your butler the amount your spending on Show girls so that they claim they spent the night with THE Brucie Wayne and keep up the playboy image you have? Hide it in the Batarang Budget.

Need a Batmobile for your team of Teen Heroes? Batarang Budget. In fact, get a plane too!

Importing a snake from Taiwan to Gotham because it has a naturally occurring Bat Shaped pattern on its scales? Hide it in the Batarang Budget and Her name is Batserpent.

Did Nike drop a new Sneaker line? Hidden in the Batarang Budget (and a closet).

Did you bet your older brothers men that you could beat Killer Croc in arm wrestling and then lost? Pay for it with the Batarang Budget! (And Hope Babs doesn't have it on camera (she does))

Need to replace your CPU on your computer? Batarang Budget! (and while we're at it, let's upgrade all the computers at the library. Nobody will know.)

At this point the Batarang Budget is made up of only 4% purchases of more Batarangs, and it's just the catch all fund of purchases nobody else in the family wants to know about and so hide it in the budget nobody would look twice at.

[gappachhio]

Tim drake and Peter Parker bonding over vigilante photography

[aurora-borealis00]

Stupid head canon I came up with

When a member of the Wayne family gets married, they first get married at the Gotham court house. So that no matter how publicized their wedding is they still have a moment of just them.