#bc he fucking SLAYED that lore and that lore was GOOD and Exciting

[elytrafemme]

also btw. just wanted to point out how Boundless Sands and the Las Nevadas Finale (no matter HOW u feel about them) both made attempts and imo did a GOOD JOB at handling the conversation about recovery. neither c!Wilbur nor c!Quackity were perfect and clearly in the beginning or in the midst of a messy road to healing but w the letters and w Friend being in limbo + c!Wilbur going home we see like. the characters were WORKING on healing and being better as people. and that to me was not only a testament to how much cc!Wilbur and cc!Quackity loved their damn characters, but was also something that really reassured me. you know as someone who has had their own mental health issues too (clearly) and has been in the throes of the recovery process for a while. shits messy and shits unclear and you relapse but you TRY and cc!Wilbur and cc!Quackity did a good job being both gentle & real about the trying part.

versus the fucking “DSMP vol 1 finale”, aka a stream that was clearly coordinated (bold word choice of mine, implying anything here was really planned) by Dream and only included some of the biggest streamers (For all the DSMP season 3 / prison break stream had faults, at least more than 5 fucking people were on the server doing things !!!), had HORRIBLE messaging about the process of healing. Ppl have gone back and forth about how bad the whole Tommy Dream “reconcilation” thing was, and I didn’t watch the stream so I only know bits and therefore can only be taken w a grain of salt here. BUT i think that the fact that (1) Tommy was even entertaining the thought of making amends, or if you think that he was making amends at the time, with Dream NOT APOLOGIZING and no follow up to show that forgiving abusers doesnt absolve their guilt and also u dont have to forgive abusers and also Tommy wasnt at fault  . and also (2) that the finale involved THE ENTIRE SERVER BLOWING UP which not only signifies that these characters NEVER got a chance to heal but also ensured everyone excluding like c!Q and c!Wil NEVER COULD. Is fucking horrific and disgusting to me. 

and not to even talk about Dream as a person bc I have so many fucking thoughts about how all that makes the messaging surrounding power dynamics in the finale So much worse (and is the reason I have yet to watch the stream bc I will just trigger myself thinking about that). 

So fucking disgusting to see how the dsmp finale happened, with NO regards to the majority of other streamers, just Dream and whoever could mindlessly tag on that happened to have pretty big viewer counts (shocker), and completely throwing out the characters and the story that have been built for YEARS. Versus how streamers like Quackity and Wilbur handled things, INCLUSIVELY and COMPASSIONATELY and fucking EXCELLENTLY, in my opinion.

[nono-uwu]

Ons chapter 135 thoughts!!

Spoilers duh (also very long post. Lmk if I should add the read more cut)

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- KAGAMI I DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD IT IN YOU TO GIVE CHESS AND HORN MORE SCREENTIME BUT THANK YOU ANYWAYS

- I am so glad that the whole digestion thing is more symbolical bc... that inital wording really threw me off lmao

- on that note, the immagery of the dead trees with the bodies sticking out of 'em... very creepy and on point, I think it's neat

- they actually adressed Crowley forgetting them! Wowzers (side note she looks hella adorable. My little skrunkly)

- ouugh the dynamic... where was it earlier? It seems so much more casual than during the Nagoya arc (probably just wishful thinking on my part lmao)... idc how give us more of this

- "you two were my first servants", LORE CRUMBS! I guess.

- wait so, they're still becoming demons? But isn't that a form of reincarnation, the thing Ferid is specifically trying to stop? But he's also devouring them... to absorb their power I guess? Since later on Ferid mentions now being more powerful after devouring Crowley (I'll get to that asspull later)

- Also Horn looks a teensy bit weird with the new artstyle but she's still super pretty 🫶 be my wife pls

- So, 16 year old Ferid is inside himself as his 'true self'? I assume that because he got the idea to stop reincarnation when he was 16 and hasn't changed his mind since (never let 16 year olds make big decisions in this world, it only leads to disaster)

- the skrunkle part 2. Also I doubt being digested like that feels good in any way. And with how slow it's supposed to be, yikes.

- I have a theory (aka major amounts of copium): Yuu will bust in and save Crowley because of 'fAmiLy' and also save Chess and Horn since they're family by association

- No one can reach Ferid, eh? And then Corwley's voice reaches him. Kagami and his queerbaiting amirite

- However Ferid then snags Crowley and ig he's on the priority list of getting devoured. Probably bc he's the strongest vampire Ferid has eaten. Cannibalism as a metaphor for love and devotion or whatever, except it's very literal and I doubt there's any love beyond 'u and interesting critter dude' from both sides

- Ok here's my major nitpick with this chapter: KAGAMI STOP BREAKING AND BENDING YOUR OWN FUCKING WORLDBUILDING AND POWER SYTEMS. Until now it was established that a vampires strenght is dependant on 1. their rank (as in who's blood turned them) and 2. their age. But now appearantly Ferid can eat vampires and absorb their strenght? If this was some universal but very difficult thing for any vampire to do, then I wouldn't be this salty. Also one of my favourite things about Ferid as an antagonist was, that power-wise he was on the weaker side. Despite being 'weak' he was still a major threat. He made up for his lack in actual fighting power with smarts and immaculate planning. But now he's another uber-strong genius. C'mon we already had Shikama and Rigr for that department. Bleh.

- now for the Yuu / Rigr and co confrontation, it's fiiiiine. I guess. At least Shikama is still somewhat of a formidable threat. Not to the major characters obviously but yk, it's something.

- rip Basteya. You showed up, slayed for a little and died.

- Kirsten still looks fugly as hell lmao

- so do Ulrich and Roger

- So, who will be faster: Shinoa in absorbing Shikama or Yuu in saving him? My bet is on Yuu purley bc he's supposed to be the main character but ig we'll see next chapter

- KRUL!!! AND THE BAT THING I FORGOT IT'S NAME

- sadly no Ferid / Krul brawl this chapter but yk what makes me excited for next chapter

- my guess is that now Krul is Ferids next target to be chomped. Hopefully she will beat his ass. Like when she first appeared. Ahhh the good old times

- 'A big fan of yours... M'lady Queen' lmao. What's next Ferid, will you put on a Fedora? Bro that last panel ain't it. Fuckin Sebastian of black butler wannabe 💀

[hardestgrove]

A prompt request in case it inspires you. Loving your Btvs/ST stuff and now I can't stop thinking. Mungrove with Vampire Slayer Billy (or The Slayer Billy) and vampire Eddie

HERE WE GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO [HEAVY METAL SCREAM] AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

rating: G/PG warnings: none really lotta swearing tho words: 2,404 pairing: Billy Hargrove x Eddie Munson

no Ao3 link atm bc i'm lazy and this is just SO bespoke. i genuinely don't know what i wanna do with all the stranger things/buffy the vampire slayer crossover stuff in my head djksdfgdfs. i'll make a post for the ao3 link if i ever make one.

NOTE: this is a TRANSGIRL!BILLY EXPERIENCE! slayer lore is a "girls only" thing which, when you expand that past late 90s mainstream acceptable progressivism i've always interrupted as people who have a female spirit/vibe/essence/whatever the fuck. basically not bio-femaleness but idk like gender vibes. (i'll also say i'm nonbinary myself and the blood i sweat over this gordian knot is ridiculous and this is what i have thus far so we're running with it)

it's also my first time writing a transwoman character so i hope i did right by the girlies. lemme know if anything should be edited!

Billie should’ve slayed Eddie years ago. He was basically the one smudge on her otherwise perfect slayer record. She couldn’t find it in her to do it thought no matter how much she tried. Sure they’d gone at each other a few times, a murder attempt here or there from either side but honestly none of it was all that serious. Their fights always seemed to fall apart though by the end so at this point they just didn’t bother with it really.

If she was being honest there was more to it then just that. For a dead guy Eddie was full of life, bright and charming and just so excited about things. Billie spend so much of her life hunting things down, being hunted, beating the shit out of things, getting the shit kicked out of her, killing things and trying not to get killed back herself. It was dark and lonely most of the time, even if she’d never trade it back for her old life it didn’t mean she didn’t wish she had more in her life than death. And while she’d never admit it to a soul, Eddie made her feel alive.

The majority of vampires seemed stuck in time but while Eddie’s style hadn’t changed much since the 70s, he was different. He was handsome with big brow doe eyes, lean bodied with a wavy brown shag he hadn’t changed in like, 20 years, but still looked really good on him. But he was dynamic in a way the others weren’t. His look wasn’t stagnation, it was preference. Billie had always liked how his hands where bigger than hers, even if it was just by a little. He’d somehow talked her into letting him give her some guitar lessons (yes dumb idea vampire near neck, she knew this. We’ve already established the Eddie weak spot here though) and she couldn’t stop coming back to how long and pretty his hands were, how they covered hers nicely when he helped her work out all the strings and movements.

Eddie had a band — of course — and it was a actually pretty good. It was kind of a shame Eddie’d been turned, he was really talented, if he’d lived he could’ve really gotten famous. Now that he was a vampire though he was pretty much regulated to the small stages only, though he was actually pretty big on the supernatural music scene. Much to her chagrin Billie was starting to feel like a groupie. She tried to catch as many of his shows as she could for years now. And yes, okay — she was a little starstruck. Eddie had seen all her favorite bands in concert when they were making some of her favorite albums, he’d jammed with Metallica when they were hot off Kill ‘Em All. They liked all the same music and Billie lived for music. Eddie was, frankly, kind of a real rockstar in the demon world, like their best kept secret from the humans when it came to rock. Watching Eddie play was electrifying. He was gorgeous and powerful on stage, totally in his element. She didn’t get why he was still hanging out on the Hellmouth, LA was only two hours away, he’d do so much better there.

They were doing a cover of “Am I Evil” by Diamond Head and Eddie was practically crooning it at her where she sat at the bar. She blushed in spite of herself. He was such a little shit, always pulling shit like this with her. She stayed in her seat and she didn’t look away however, that’d be admitting he’d won which was so never going to happen. She stayed their whole set and left when they packed up to go do her patrols. Just like always. And just like always somehow Eddie found her no matter where she was.

She was in Restfield Cemetery doing a clean up of any newly risen vampires when he sauntered out from behind a mausoleum his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket grinning his stupid adorable grin.

“Hey baby. How’s the day in the office so far?”

Billie rolled her eyes. “Slow and boring. It’s been nothing but fledges so far and not even a lot of them.”

“Well hey, I’m here now. Can’t do much about the lack of villainous lambs to slaughter but I can fix the boredom part.”

Billie rolled her eyes. “Right so I can be annoyed and not get anything done all at the same time.”

“Oh baby, don’t be like that.” He cooed, coming to place his hands on Billie’s hips. She was only a little taller than Eddie in her heels. “C’mon. What can I do to turn my best girl’s frown upside down huh?”

Billie blushed again and looked down, the hand not holding her stake fiddling with his beat up leather jacket. Her heart always skipped a beat when he called her things like “baby” and “best girl” and they both knew it.

“Nothing. I just wanna finish my stupid fucking patrol report back that there’s nothing going on in this shithole town and go bed.”

“Nah not buying it. I think I know what’ll make my babygirl smile again.” His breath was cool against her cheek as he nuzzled her. “How about a private concert huh? We finish up staking my distant relatives or whatever, head back to your place and I play some of your faves. I’ll take requests and everything.”

Fuck, he really had her now. Eddie was always buttering her up but he was really laying it on thick to night. He probably wanted something then and knowing her, she’d probably end up giving it to him if it wasn’t totally insane.

She nodded and Eddie grinned even wider against her cheek before kissing the corner of her mouth sweetly.

“There’s my girl, so sweet for me. Now lemme see how ya tear em apart huh?”

Patrolling with Eddie was always more fun than patrolling alone. They flowed well together in a fight and when there was nothing to do he was a great conversation partner. They always walked together so close their arms would brush as they went. Some nights Eddie would catch her hand and hold it, winking at her every time he did. She let him, because she was a weak bitch who lost her shit over holding hands with her vampire crush who she should be staking. With Eddie there the boring drag of patrol just flew by and they were heading back to her’s for the night in no time.

They still called it her place but Eddie had an invite and somehow over the few years they’d been getting closer all of his things had ended up in her apartment. They slept in the same fucking bed now for fucks sake. Somehow Eddie had weaved himself into her life so completely she couldn’t pull the edges apart anymore. She knew the Council wouldn’t approve if she was still living under their thumb, Hopper barely tolerated it as it was. Sure, she was the Slayer but she was a 20 year old girl too. A girl who wanted a life, and to love and be loved. She was still scared to admit it out loud, afraid if she did he’d vanish like everything else that’d been good her life, but she loved Eddie. She loved him so much. And the things he did and said— it was getting harder to convince herself that he didn’t feel the same. Not when he proved it every day.

So what if he was a vampire. Was it so wrong for her to want this? Was there ever going to be a normal guy who could even understand, let alone keep up, with her? Why should she hold out on the off chance that guy did exist somewhere in the world when she had this loving man right here, now?

Ever the gentleman Eddie opened the door for her, his hand resting on her lower back as he ushered her inside. They both went to the kitchen where Billie pulled out leftovers for her and a blood bag for Eddie while he got a mug out for microwaving his blood. They waited around together for their food to be warmed up, Eddie wrapping her in his arms and swaying them as he hummed. Dinner was always a pretty lazy affair and they scarfed their food down at the counter before unceremoniously dumping their dishes in the sink to be tomorrow’s problem. Finally they both got ready for bed, Billie getting out of her very cute halter and into a soft pink pajama set and Eddie stripped down to his boxers. He laid his warlock down next to her on the bed but before he set it up for their private concert he maneuvered her to the edge of the bed and knelt between her legs.

His hands were cool on her thighs has he rubbed little circles with his thumbs into her skin.

“Baby there’s something I’ve been wanting to ask you for a while now.”

Fear gripped her immediately, the self doubt she still couldn’t shake rearing its ugly head. Did he want to break up? Did he want something she couldn’t give? To do something she couldn’t do? Had this all been a lie to get her so blind and stupid she’d help him do something awful?

Eddie kept rubbing in those little circles, his eyes were warm and gentle. Full of love. She took the leap and went with trusting him.

She licked her lips, her voice only cracked a little. “Yeah Eds?”

“Move to LA with me.”

She stared at him stunned for a long moment, totally thrown for a loop. Never in her life would she have thought this is what he’d want to talk about. Slowly she collected herself.

“But, Eddie I can’t leave the Hellmouth. It’s my job.”

“There’s the new girl here now and she’s been doing great. You’re not chained here and it’s LA, we’re only 2 hours away. If they need us we can be there in no time.”

Jane was doing well, especially with the help of her little gaggle of loser friends and Hopper keeping an eye on her. But she was only 15, she was a kid. How could Billie leave this whole place to a kid? A voice in her head pointed out she’d been about that age when she’d become the Slayer and she’d been basically totally solo through most of her tenure here. Jane had a group of friends to help and a Watcher who took good care of her. She was infinitely better off than Billie had been at that age.

Still she couldn’t just leave.

“I can’t just leave it all on her, it’s my sacred duty or whatever to—“

“Baby,” He broke in, his voice and expression sterner than she’d ever seen. “You’ve already died once. “

Automatically her hand came to the scar on her chest and she rubbed it absently. They only had Jane because Billie had died. There was only ever one Slayer, as like, a semi-reincarnated chosen one thing. One died and the next was called. But Billie had been revived in the hospital so now there were two.

Eddie continued. “I’m not saying you stop slaying. I don’t think you can ever really stop being a Slayer just like I can’t stop being a vampire. But I don’t wanna see an encore of that shit. Ever. Once was enough. I’m not gonna let you get stuck living a small life in a small town because of some ancient prophecy shit anymore just so that prophecy shit can snuff you out before you got a chance to live. You deserve more. Sunnydale was only ever supposed to be a pitstop for the band but I convinced the guys to stay because I loved you the moment I saw you and I wasn’t leaving here without you. The guys are starting to really chafe now, the music scene here is only half decent cause it’s a Hellmouth and 2 hours down to LA for club gigs is getting to be a pain in the ass. They wanna move to where the action is and I think it’s time for all of us— you included— to make the leap. I held off on talking about this until we could make sure that Jane’ll be alright so you could leave with a clean conscience and she’s gonna be as fine as any Slayer can be. Baby, I love you. It’s okay to move on with your life. You’re a grown woman and you deserve to be somewhere with more opportunities for your future. Steve’s already down there and you always talk about how you miss him. Wouldn’t you rather be living closer to your best friend then stuck hanging around with teeny boppers?”

Billie’s eyes were hot with unspent tears. He was right. She missed Steve. He’d been her only friend since she’d blown into Sunnydale and he’d moved down to LA to get work and try to get into culinary school after graduation and his parents losing everything because of tax evasion. She loved Eddie but she still felt lonely without her best friend. And she did want to do more with her life, even if it was just party and be somewhere that couldn’t be easily walked in a few hours again. She missed living in a real city like San Diego. She hated the idea she’d been holding Eddie back but she also couldn’t stop crying because she was so happy he’d stayed. No one ever stayed. But Eddie’d taken one look at her and dropped everything just so he could be with her. God he was too good for her.

Still crying she nodded, trying to smile. God she was glad he’d waited until she’d taken her makeup off.

“Okay Eddie. You’re right, let’s move.”

Eddie beamed and kissed her, wrapping an arm around her waist and helping her to dry her tears with the other.

“Love you baby.”

For once, she felt brave. “ I love you too Eddie.”

If it was possible he beamed even harder and kissed her again soundly before setting up with the warlock bedside her on the bed.

“Okay! We’re celebrating! Any requests from my lady love?”

[serlymurly]

A RANT ABOUT CHARACTERS, CREATION, AND THE PROCESS OF BEING INSANE

It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Let’s have a rant. A good, old fashioned rant about something that’s been nagging at my mind. First, paint the scene;

It’s 6 in the morning. The sun is rising outside. The love of my life is asleep in bed, our cat is in a box lined with a fuzzy blanket that I could have draped around my shoulders because frankly, it’s a bit cold. We have no creamer, and I think coffee wouldn’t help this headache that’s pounding away at my skull - and I have four people talking in my head.

Did I lose you yet? Probably not. It’s pretty straight forward. First - the puppy nailed to the wall. Four people talking in my head, what? Well - technically, I think they’re all me. But on a different level, only two of them are me. Got it?

One of me is going on about how this is all, in fact, a terrible idea and that to post any of this is to admit to a certain kind of insanity that I really shouldn’t be admitting to. This isn’t normal, on any level; I’ve never heard people talk about it, and the only person that I’m aware is actually on point with how I do things in writing is asleep.

The other part of me really wants banana bread, and frankly, I can’t fault that. Can you? Of course you fucking can’t, unless you’re allergic to bananas. Fuck yeah, banana bread.

Then, there’s the other two. One is a face that people who follow me are familiar with; James Oaklen. Don’t know who he is? Probably not! I’ll talk about him later. And he’s having a lovely conversation with this newest creation, this newest part of my intracranial house - Aeslen. But I won’t talk about her. Not yet.

So, yes. Four people. All adamantly talking their points, all actively going on and doing their own thing; existing in some level on a scene that I’ve always had in my head. Let’s explain that bit, shall we? Sorry this is disjointed - again, no coffee.

Flash back I don’t know how many years, and I was a young, young boy. I barely had any understanding of how to type; I’d never played a game outside of Banjo-Kazooie and Super Mario 64, games that required a controller.

I will spare the dirty details, but life at home was not perfect. There was yelling; there was hitting, there was strife, and a family that was slowly tearing itself apart. I could see the writing on the wall when I was 7, that’s how bad it was. So - my mom decides it’s a good idea to introduce me to this game she plays.

A game called Ultima Online.

And holy crap, that was amazing! I spent hours doing nothing of any importance on her computer, on our shitty internet in that crappy home in Ohio, just exploring this world with a character that I had created with my own two hands in a whole other world. This was a concept that I had never experienced; this was a new and exciting frontier for me. I named him Krill because that’s a COOL name and it sounds COOL. I gave him flaming red hair, I made him a paladin, and I spent hours just trying to kill skeletons in a really easy area at the start of the game because I kept forgetting how to fight things.

And then, one day, everything changed. UO, it turns out, maybe just the server I was on - had a very active community of this thing called ‘Role Players’. Weird, right? People who actively played out their characters as real, living things - in this world. Personalities, histories, everything. I stumbled on them by accident when I got lost in the big castle in the main town of the game.

There, at the time, was a bunch of high-end guilds. One was the Orcs (it was just people with orc masks on, but they pretended to be orcs and they rocked at it). There was the Highlanders (they wore kilts and I REALLY WANTED TO BE ONE). There was a merchant guild, and - all these other guilds I feel bad not remembering. And I was just this little seven-year old kid with a character named Krill with flaming red hair that walks into the middle of this big, IC meeting they were having. Imagine them responding to me with actual respect?

Imagine them actually… explaining what they were doing? With respect? I was so awestruck, I asked if I could play. They made me door guard. Boy, LET ME TELL YOU, I took that job so seriously. I stood just outside the meeting and I could see all their little talk, all while making sure nobody entered without permission. I was so hyped.

That, that stuck with me. Okay? Remember that. The idea - the concept that they had presented to me, this way that you could live another life through a digital form. That stuck with me.

But - well, things change. People. Lives. I never really got into the RP scene on that game; I wandered around and pretended to be part of things, but it was mostly them politely recognising me and letting me watch them do stuff. I only had an hour each day online, so it just - wasn’t enough. Eventually, my mom stopped paying for her UO account due to issues. So - back to the nintendo and other things.

Flash forward. Divorce imminent between the two parents. The world is collapsing around us children. My sisters are massive assholes, my brother and I feel like we’re alone together in a sea. So… in a desperate attempt to keep his spirits up, I introduce him to the concept. “Let’s pretend to be Link and go slay invisible monsters!”

Stupid, right? So we pick up sticks and start staying as far away from our house as we could. We’d talk about all the things we were fighting, we’d hit each other with ‘swords’, we’d drag our local friends into it! We just - disassociated. I think for him, it was mostly the swinging the sticks that was interesting; always fighting, always smacking things. But for me? I was using my mind to, you know. Envision such grandiose and wondrous things for us to be fighting! I was imagining landscapes, unspeakable monsters, and the type of person that I would be!

That evolved. Stuff happened again. We moved from where we’d been living to a new environment; Michigan. I like Michigan, don’t get me wrong; fucking love it there. But, well - we were young. I didn’t know anyone, and it was 5th grade. And then - more stuff happened.

I won’t go into nitty details, but one of my sister’s had a major incident occur. This lead to the family being put under more strain, which eventually finally snapped the cord. Grandparents died. One suddenly, one from cancer shortly after. A nasty, nasty divorce that left me feeling horrible. I was convinced that I could have stopped it - all of it. I was convinced that I should have; since I wanted to be that big hero, remember? Since I wanted to shoulder all the burdens.

I took it upon myself to never show any problems outwardly, after that point. I just smiled and acted silly and nobody really paid me much mind. “Oh, he’s always fine!” It’s about this time I got into (GASP) UO again. Freeservers, this time; technically, I think that was illegal, but who cares. I got deep into it; I made my first *real* RP character, who was of course a massive dork. Leone, a grey elf ranger that ate lemons - because I’d convinced *myself* that if you ate enough lemons, you could spit caustic spit? I don’t know, I was weird.

Leone would be my staple character for a long time. So long, in fact, that I began to wonder - as maybe we all do - where he stopped and I began. Sure, he was an elf with magic and grey skin - but personality wise, I felt he was a lot like me!

Then I learned that was a cardinal sin of roleplay. Apparently, you should never - EVER - make a character like yourself. You become too attached - which I did. You become too personally involved - which I did.

Games change, years move on. I went to SWG, I played a new character - Stodosmo Oci (horrible name I know). He was a security officer at a hospital! It was great. I loved it. It was a long, boring time of just sitting and watching doctors RP it out with patients in Mos Entha. And then.. I don’t know. Things. Again.

Went from there to WoW. Technically, I’d been in WoW since Vanilla - but the lore had never struck me as interesting enough to roleplay in seriously until just before BC released. I had a series of characters there, all sharing the same last name; Rodetan. Eventually, as Wrath came to a close, I decided to consolidate them into one large family tree.

WoW’s timeline sucks. That’s all you need to know about that.

Who remembers the early days of WRA? Alliance-side, there was a guild called ‘Stormwind’s Army’. Yes, it was just another military RP guild. Yes, we did a lot of patrolling and policing. It was fun, though; my character rose from an unwashed bum to chief recruitment officer. And then - drama happened. The guild split. I followed the ‘rebels’, and we formed the Vanguard of the Alliance (VotA). That was also fun.

Anyways, I’m sparing you all the nitty-gritty details - but this is where the story, once more, becomes interesting. After so long, VotA eventually fell apart. We all went our separate ways, and eventually three of the officers let me know that they’re still RPing in-game with this new group - Blood of Arathor, I think it was called. I’m asked if I want to join them. I say - sure, but not on the character I’d been using.

At the time, I was - kind of embarrassed of that character. I still am. He’s my best success story, yes, but he felt - I don’t know. Too close to me, in some ways that I won’t get into. So I thought - why not make a NEW character?!

OH BOY.

But there was a problem. And this is what most of this rant was building up to.

I had to build a new character.

From scratch.

Alright, that doesn’t sound so bad, does it? - Except somewhere along the line of creating him - he came alive. In designing him, in creating his personality - I suddenly found that I was physically talking to myself - and in my mind, this quiet man was responding. James Oaklen, Knight of Stromgarde, was telling me about himself.

His goals. His life. His loves. His interests. All about himself; his world. How he felt about certain foods, how he felt about everything.

At the time - I had very, very acute problems in the real world. I was taking drugs, drinking heavily, I was obnoxiously depressed to the point of being borderline suicidal - and… well, this happened. What did it mean?

Don’t answer that. It’s not a real question, because it doesn’t matter.

I accepted that he was who he was - and he’s become one of my favorite recurring personalities in my characters. And he’s not the only one, anymore. At some point, this - new way of creation, this way to create characters that exist in my own mind - just, settled in.

So.. I wanted to document how it works. Sort of. Maybe you at home can replicate it?

I start by closing my eyes. I think about what races there are to choose from, what classes or skillsets; and then I just… start to see a person. Whoa, weird, huh? Just an outline. A faint outline.

So, we reach out with our mind, and we call to them; and they slowly come forward. We get an imprint, a basic idea for what they look like, in our minds. So - we go to the creator and we try to do that. As close as possible.

Then we look at the character. Scars; how did they get them? Each scar is a story in itself, and as you look - they begin to tell you about each one. As if just explaining casually. James has a scar along his neck, which he earned when he almost died defending his Lady - something that he constantly thinks about as a time that he failed.

Or, other big features? James - again, using him as an example - has a large, bushy black moustache. It’s his family’s staple, a sign of their masculinity and proof that an Oaklen has come of age.

And so on. Then, by the time we get to the point where we have to name them, they’ve already told us the most important things. We don’t just have a vague outline in our little mind shack; now, we have a PERSON. And the name? Well… That’s a limitation of the system, baby. Pick something as close to what resembles the name they called themselves, and stick to it.

I could go into more depth. I could go into the process of creating a video where I create a character, but - well, why? It’s just this vague idea that I want to get across right now. I really doubt anyone will read this five-to-seven page long spiel all the way through. But it’s just - interesting, to me. It constantly is there, this - process, these characters, these people. And not just them; worlds come just as easily. Is that the product of an over-active imagination from a man that was desperately seeking to avoid reality and paint a better fiction for himself to sit in? Probably.

But… I don’t know. When it boils down to it, I just let it happen. I get ideas in my head all the time for wondrous worlds, characters and things - but the most agonizing problem is that they can never seem to translate into text or print. I can’t paint worth a damn, I can barely draw - and the one medium I have for escape, Roleplay, is something that I barely do anymore.

So - how do I make it stop? Do I want to make it stop? Should I? How do I harness this? How do I focus it into something specific?

If you made it this far, congratulations. I don’t know how to end it, so I’m just tagging all the mmo’s I’ve ever played or remember playing for giggles. Kudos if you get all of them!

[jungnoir]

mini cryptid hunter!bts au bc i was enabled

@clockwork-lullaby this was probably more than you were asking for but it’s happening

yoongi

the “logical” cryptid hunter. if you watch buzzfeed unsolved just think shane LOL

yoongi just has a really specific fear and it’s of demons

grew up in a really religious church playing the piano as a kid so he always heard about “exorcisms” being done on the church grounds late at night from his friends

yoongi isn’t as dumb but i mean he’s bored on a friday night and his parents are out for their anniversary so he goes and sneaks in with them to the church and the lights are on and he actually encounters a possessed church goer getting cleansed by a few priests but it’s just. like not working?

the person is absolutely livid and seething and speaking in a crackly voice and suddenly the demon notices him and his friends run but yoongi is just stone still

before the demon can try and hurt him it’s exorcised and yoongi is completely mortified and the priests are like “kid omg why are you here you could have DIED” and they tell him to never speak of it to anyone and yoongi’s smart enough to know that what he’s just seen is something way beyond his years

in fact he’s repressed it so much that even when he’s older sometimes he has to remind himself it happened and now hunting demons is just his damn calling

100% carries a dagger or something dipped in holy water and probably knows a bunch of bible verses that’ll make a demon squeal right off the top of his head

when not hunting demons, he’s usually just making fun of namjoon for getting spooked all the time LOL

him and hoseok are like the lethal duo for demons like god forbid you’re a demon and get on their bad side bc u will be finessed tf into a pile of ash

probably naps on the way to haunted sites and the first maknae to rouse him from his sleep is carrying him to their destination

(but never jimin bc jimin is not a heathen like the others ofc)

namjoon

ok i’m gonna crack on my boyfriend real quick: DUDE IS SUCH A BABY OH MY GOD!!! HOW DID HE GET HERE!!! WHY IS HE DOING THIS!!!!! WHY COULDN’T HE MAKE FRIENDS WITH NORMAL PEOPLE WHO DON’T HUNT THE SUPERNATURAL

he’s v smart and reads up on lots of folklore from all around the world so he’s your go to when you wanna figure out what’s been spooking the locals

namjoon says he doesn’t believe in the supernatural but this is usually said in a small, squeaky chant under his breath as he wanders through the cemetery during witching hour with his six dumb ass friends and why did he have to start that casual conversation with hoseok that one time in biology-

has never had a definite brush with the supernatural BUT 9/10 he’s gonna think a floorboard creaking is the hounds of hell coming after him

it’s even worse that he’s clumsy

if jin isn’t holding onto him he’s most likely gonna run and fall when something remotely worrying happens and they aren’t carrying an injured namjoon through another haunted house again, goddamit joon

his favorite subject is aliens and he’s constantly letting the boys know that they are out there and they are avoiding the human race bc the human race is, in fact, super fucking stupid

is also stuck between wanting to get abducted so he can be left alone or wanting the rest of the world to get abducted so he can be left alone

tough choices, really

if shit goes down namjoon is either hiding behind yoongi or hoseok and he only trusts those two to get him out safely

“the rest of you are despicably hopeless” “you trip on dust, namjoon”

jin

the Responsible Adult

also easily spooked as fuck skfjekfi

ngl he’s only slightly more calm than namjoon but that is not,,,, by much

they usually cling to each other to calm each other down (the fucking waves of anxiety rolling off of the both of them is truly just. terrible. they’re both so nervous you can feel it from right at home behind the screen of your phone from which you’re reading this)

jin babbles when he’s scared too, and starts singing old nursery rhymes his mom sang him when he was still scared of the monsters under his bed

but ok. his reflexes are WAY better than namjoon’s bc where namjoon is “scream and run”, jin’s is “punch and run”

dude don’t even know what he saw but he’s already swinging

jin knows ghosts are real because he had an imaginary friend as a child who resembled the old owner of his house pretty spot on

since he figured that out, he can’t sleep in his old room alone any more and will use any excuse in the book to share with his parents when he visits

jin is always carrying snacks for the boys bc cryptid hunting is brutal man,, here’s a protein bar and some holy water

uses a fanny pack to carry said snacks and while yoongi has made every joke in the book abt it, who is the one carrying the antiseptic in a conveniently stored place when said min yoongi gets a cut hm

hoseok 

ok ok hoseok had a somewhat similar experience to yoongi as a kid and is also a great demon hunter

his family taught him about the evil shits as a kid so he’s always been aware of them even if kids always called him dumb for thinking they were real

uniquely enough, his choice of weapon is a bow and arrow (also dipped in holy water but depending on what they hunt, he could use anything speared by his arrow)

he really REALLY loves hunting famous lore tho like one time they actually tried to find bigfoot and he was so excited the whole time he couldn’t sleep. he learned the mating call and everything

(yoongi brought earplugs specifically for this reason)

he used to be easily spooked as a kid but now he’s steeled his nerves, if only to become the best monster hunter he can be

does copious amounts of research with joonie (listen ok they have sleepovers together and just geek out over the possibilities of some cryptid existing somewhere and hoseok gets stars in his eyes imagining what could be. namjoon loves analyzing the logic and sets hoseok on the right path since he tends to get a bit daydreamy when it comes to the famous stuff)

imagine him just freakin slaying a demon in front of the boys and getting a cocky lil smirk on his face

“calm down buffy, your ego is gonna be too big to fit in the van home”

jimin

ngl first thing he thinks about when his friends talk abt the supernatural is unicorns and fairies

he’s not v acquainted with the darker stuff

honestly doesn’t know why he’s hanging out with them all but he’s just happy to be here

always asks questions about what the boys know or have experienced. he’s really interested and he gets v empathetic

“no taehyung we can’t watch the poltergeist tonight, you know how uncomfortable it makes namjoon and jin” “we hunt these things daily u know that right”

v interested in magic

anything the boys find that involves magic, jimin is 110% hyper focused on the subject

he does his own lil research in his own time but he can’t help reading creepypastas sometimes

he doesn’t know any better ok!!!

also carries snacks but in a backpack bc he really can’t get behind the fanny pack

jin: they’re convenient

jimin: they’re a fashion abomination is what they are

one time they were hunting a monster that jumped out at taehyung and jimin just fuckin

decked it

like no thought just a right hook to the eye(s)

there were multiple eyes and jimin couldn’t stop whining abt the residue on his hand as they ran back to the van to hide

he’s just having a good time with his friends and didn’t really sign up for the monster bit but that’s okay

taehyung

so uh

taehyung can talk to the dead

this has actually been a thing he could do since he was a kiddo and similarly to hoseok, he was shunned for it because nobody believed him

he communicates with past relatives or family friends of his often for his family (who also know and find it kind of lovely what he can do) and sometimes passes on things for the dead to their living family

like he’ll order orange tulips sent to the home of a grieving widow bc her recently deceased husband asked him to do him that favor, something her husband had been planning on picking up for her the day he died

or he’ll quietly look after his classmate whose mother died because he was asked to. he’ll share his lunch with her and make sure she eats because her mother just knows she’s not well

when he met hoseok (who is really the heart of this lil group), he just felt so much relief at finally being understood

he’s really a great mediator for ghosts when they encounter them and he’s so helpful at leading them to the afterlife if needed

he’s really not scared of much to be honest. he finds everything so fascinating

sometimes it drains him being kind of a connect between the human and spiritual world but he’s so glad he was born that way, it’s helped him meet so many wonderful people and he loves who he is

and yeh ok taehyung abuses his power like the lil shit he is sometimes

tae: did you wash the dishes

jk: *clearly lying* yeh

tae: the ghost standing next to you begs to differ

jk: ...for the love of god taE NOT AGAIN

jungkook

ok, like i said,,, dude is an adrenaline junkie

jungkook does not give two flying shits he will deadass fight a headless forest demon in his living room if he has to

jungkook fears no man or god

strongest member so he’s always the one to carry namjoon when he inevitably hurts himself and has to be helped

even tho he’s not easily scared for his own life, he is scared for his family and friends

his worst nightmare is losing any of them to something they hunt

sometimes he’ll line windows and doors in his house with salt discreetly, just enough for it to work and just enough that his mom won’t yell at him for wasting perfectly good salt

is always researching protection spells and things just in case he’ll ever need em, usually consults yoongi for help too

“who do you think would win in a fight between mothman and a wendigo”

genuinely cannot function on an empty stomach and the boys have to stop by convenience stores to buy him like six cups of instant ramen just to satiate him

of course jin has some snacks in his handy fanny pack if needed (and has made painstakingly clear if jungkook mocks said fanny pack that he will be banned from getting snacks from it for the rest of his “measly young life”)

jungkook has some good sense and hasn’t said a word (but he has thought a copious amount, for sure)