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#bc two kids who believe no one is going to come for them
isa-ghost · 20 hours
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was reading through your q!phil hc masterpost and was wondering if you could add any of your codebreakers/etoilza headcanons into the fray…? :3
YESSSS I CAN'T BELIEVE IT TOOK THIS LONG TO GET ASKED /LH
qPhil headcanons masterlist
RESTATES for my and your convenience (heads up, there are suggestive/mildly explicit mentions!!):
--He's FWB with Etoiles. Extremely QPR, Etoiles is an aro king --He and Phil started out as friends and that has Barely changed if at all, but sparring matches get a little too homoerotic sometimes and neither of them can resist the other when they're popping off extra hard. Things have. Escalated a few times. If yknow what I mean. Of all Phil's harem members polycule partners, he & Etoiles have absolutely ZERO emotional investment in the Spicy(tm) things they do together. It's simply a very intimate way of showing each other their respect & admiration for the other. What they have going on is a "*spanks you* good game, let's hit the showers team" kinda deal. They're the type of mfs to finish in bed then shake hands like "gg." Casual sex is >>>> to these two, but it happens waaay less between them than it did Phil & Fit, Fitza was habitual (pre-Pac). Codebreakers is a once in a while thing --Etoiles has 100% asked Phil who fucks the best out of the polycule bc like everything else, it's a competition & he Must win, he Must have the best dick game. This amuses Phil very much --Phil is attracted to Etoiles the same way he's attracted to Fit, HOWEVER, the reasoning is different. Etoiles has raw skill and talent, but it's the way he wields it and demonstrates it that makes Phil wanna act up. Also Etoiles is fucking hilarious. Who can resist a good sense of humor? Those dramatics make Phil swoon --Etoiles is one of the people who is best at catching Phil's Tells for when something is wrong --Etoiles is one of few people who can convince (or goad) Phil into doing something he normally wouldn't, especially if he's drunk --Speaking of Phil being drunk around Etoiles, the way he can still absolutely body someone or snipe smth from miles away makes Etoiles want to kiss him stupid --Etoiles left a scar on Phil's back during Purgatory when he killed him Day 1. Phil didn't know for the longest time, but it took him a while to show him his wings after that. --Phil was genuinely afraid of Etoiles (& Fit) for a while after Purgatory --Sometimes Phil's laughs and startled yelps sound almost like squawks. Also his hiccups. It's very rare, but whenever it happens, he gets teased for it. Especially by Etoiles. --Phil goes back and forth on gifting one of his shed feathers to Etoiles --Technically all of the Polycule vs Ender King hcs apply to Etoiles in some way --Phil could listen to Etoiles teach him about French culture for hours
And now the new stuff :D
Etoiles's dramatics can get Phil in tears laughing. His sides and stomach will hurt before it's over, and Etoiles can go on for MINUTES. Sometimes he'll keep going purely because it has Phil dying so hard and he loves seeing what a kick Phil gets out of it
Etoiles is (playfully) salty that Phil is such a My Kids Come First kinda guy bc GOD does he want Phil to be down to do dangerous pvp and dungeon busting shit without the "euuu we gotta make sure it's safe" aspect more often. He wants that Angel of Death. Etoiles is the #1 Dadza (Derogatory) islander /lh
See, Fitza is more explicit and deadass about their,, Time together. Codebreakers is more subtle. Yknow that "media literacy is knowing when something that isn't gay sex is gay sex" post? That's Codebreakers. Sparring, dungeon busting, whatever high-risk high-exertion thing they're doing together. That.
It should go without saying how down Etoiles would be to throw hands with Ender King. It would be the most exhilarating fight he's ever had
Phil's still lowkey lost about the whole resistance thing. And schedules lately have not been kind to the two of them, so he hasn't had a chance to talk about it with Etoiles as extensively about it as he'd like to
Btw he's secretly concerned as hell smth bad is gonna happen to Etoiles if more of his body becomes corrupted by code :)
They 100% refer back to the time Etoiles said this regularly, and similar things like it. The same can be said for Fitza but my god the extent to which these two are more than willing to kill for each other. OUGH.
Phil does not realize how much pent up stress and emotion he can vent out via sparring or hitting something really fucking hard. Etoiles is going to fix that one day.
Phil's Etoiles impression has made Etoiles attempt to learn how to mimic Phil in retaliation but he cannot for the life of him get the hang of Phil's fuckass accent. Geordies stay winning to this man's dismay
Etoiles is frustratingly yet fascinatingly hard for Phil to clock sometimes. It's difficult to gauge exactly how he's feeling or what he's thinking. And yet as inconvenient that can be sometimes, something about it is incredibly attractive to Phil at the same time. Which is funny because unpredictability is usually not something his survivalist brain would like. Something about how he trusts Etoiles and therefore his being a wildcard is not so scary,,
Etoiles 🤝🏻 Chayanne - Wanting Phil to take them on a flight
I don't know if I'd call Etoiles an anarchist the same way I would Phil, but either way he is SO DOWN to fuck with the Feds if it entails any kind of pvp or the need to be geared up
Ok listen I have to call back to the gay sex subtext thing. Things that are more sex than gay sex to Codebreakers: Sparring, adrenaline, battles of wit, flexing powerful gear, thinking too much about what an absolute potential killing machine the other is, watching one another be in The Zone during a fight
Phil has more physical strength than skill with weapons and Etoiles has more skill with weapons than physical strength. Ok now imagine that while they're in a 2v# fight
I would not put it past Etoiles to pull a Missa and say smth wildly out of pocket and suggestive so fast in French that Phil doesn't catch it.
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THEY BOTH BELIEVE NO ONE WILL COME FOR THEM
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sporkprez · 9 months
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british media stop outrage baiting challenge (failed)
#“students are identifying as ANIMALS!!” good for them. who gives a shit.#<- a lot of very angry transphobes and ableist fuckheads apparently 🤷‍♂️#funny how they'll release stories targeted towards hammering the trans community whenever our government comes under fire for being shady 🤔#anyway schools aren't scheduling 9 year olds for bottom surgery or whatever the fuck you idiots think is happening.#are some teachers handling students' questions on gender terribly? yes.#(that one recorded conversation between the teacher + student who believes there's 'only two genders' makes me want to bite someone <3)#should schools support students who are therians/otherkin or have neopronouns? sure why not#“bbbbut then kids will be asking to leave the classroom to go on a walk!!” honestly? based of them#“but then there'll be LITTER BOXES in the CLASSROOM” no there fucking won't.#changing one's language to make someone feel accepted and respecting their needs really shouldn't be a big deal and yet here we are 🙃#transphobia#ableism#<- adding this because i've seen a lot of 'you must be crazy to identify as a cat!!' and... haha... 😐#neurotypicals are just salty little bitches bc they can only see 2 boxes and not a whole playground to play in#anyway i want to throw hands with the british media but also that teacher who made the student asking questions out to be a bigot#that shit just feeds people's martyr complex when it comes to trans issues#i've seen a lot of people applauding the student who said there's only two genders bc in their heads she was standing up to Big Trans#when in reality she was just being 14 and regurgitating very simplified information (and also shitting on some other kid)#teacher has that classic left-leaning moral crusade vibe idk how to explain it#like it's nice they tried sticking up for us but it fell very flat#and just makes the opposition more rabid + gives them more ammunition to scream that they're being “”oppressed“” for their oPiniOn#terds may come on this post... may the gods give me the strength to only respond with pictures of mike wazowski looking like 😐#uk politics#uk transphobia#i had to hear the word 'furry' incorrectly used on breakfast television yesterday. fuming.
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protagonistscum · 2 years
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star wars time travel fix-it my beloved
#some are great. some are not. but i love them.#my comfort au lmao#ultimate fav is luke going to the past. he has no fucking clue as to what the past is supposed to be like. i love it#even better if it is luke and leia. bc leia would actually KNOW stuff about the PT timeline#a lot are obi-wan. which is fair enough#but i love how it ranges to him being sent to being like 12 again and he's just. fuck or during the clone wars.#then there's the does he take over his past body? are there two obi-wans now?#BEN WITH LUKE..... yESSSSSSSSS#i see a lot with kid luke. i do like them. but i also adore luke just being older than anakin#also hilarious when YODA looks at luke and goes yeah. that is a padawan of mine. and never explains that is his TIME TRAVELING padawan#the fics always treat the jedi different. so some i agree more with than others but that's chill#and when i say ben i mean ben kenobi.#also love unexplained time travel that is like a one-shot but it is just SO SWEET#there is this one with luke and obi-wan and obi is just like.... this is my future padawan..... and it was just so soft and sweet?#i believe in luke going ben and yoda were my teachers. no i will not explain further#hey yoda where the fuck did luke come from? yoda just goes eh he's been wandering and now he's back. dont worry about it!#also love obi-wan who goes back to like before his was born or when his past self was a baby#there was this REALLY nice one with a time traveling vader..... sir stop kidnapping people#i also adore when the time travelers just. dont say that they are. i want them to cause shit and not explain themselves until later#love luke being able to see the jedi temple! to see the jedi as they were than what was left due to the empire slaughtering them!#any jedi going back and seeing that the other jedi are still alive and that there is a CHANCE to stop this disaster#AH that one fic where obi-wan went back and asked anakin what he would do if he know that someone was going#to commit atrocities but hasn't done them yet and anakin ANSWERED WRONG#anakin: kill them#obi-wan: so i should kill you?#and any fic where mace windu plays more significant role. i just like seeing him.#also him being able to see shatterpoints brings up a lot of interesting stuff ya know
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horang-07 · 5 months
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FNAF SPOILERS! SCROLL! TALKING ABOUT THE SPRINGLOCK SCENE!
i’ve seen so many people discussing the springlock scene in both negative and positive ways and i think it brings up really cool points about how matthew played that scene and balanced fan expectations with his own characterisation.
i think the discussions around this movie have rlly exposed the disconnect between fanon and canon in fnaf, especially talking abt the core games in isolation, bc frankly in the game universe (ignoring the books) we get Very Little characterisation for William other than the obvious, but Matthew managed to add so much in the way he talks and his body language.
in the reveal scene, we see afton at arguably his peak. in his first scene, he comes off as somewhat demeaning and judgemental until he recognises mike’s name, at which point he seems to have this nervous energy, rushing to cover it up but stumbling slightly, his reaction to the tables being turned even slightly is massive.
this is a man who committed multiple mrdrs in essentially broad daylight, hid the bodies in the most obvious place, and still got away with it, and then kept the crime scene as a trophy of his actions, and an ongoing prison sentence for his victims. he has been in complete control for decades, and is confident that he can deal with any kind of threat quickly. his confidence in his reveal is palpable
it changes when vanessa shoots him. the whole parallel with vanessa and the animatronics is hugely interesting too- how william refers to the animatronics almost endearingly as “kids” when he wants them to obey, how both vanny and the animatronics have an unearned loyalty to him, almost a pseudo-adoption through what he did to them, taking them from their parents and keeping them under his thumb, forever stuck as naive, forgiving, obedient children. vanessa breaking from that control shakes him, but the mask slips back into place almost immediately.
then, he’s outsmarted by the brother of one of his victims, and the child he planned to end next. his pseudo-children turn on him and he can no longer manipulate his appearance or shed his skin to escape. he explodes on them, and his language is incredibly telling that he is being dishonest.
he calls them small, trying to belittle them into submission, even though they are ten feet tall metal animatronics powered by rage. he is grasping at straws to regain control, and failing miserably.
finally, the springlocks go off. the locks in the movie look more like a ribcage, so the first two likely puncture his lungs. they’re slow, and painful, but he doesn’t scream or beg or sob. he grunts and groans, gritting his teeth and only letting out sounds of pain that sound almost involuntary. there is no way in hell he would visibly let himself show weakness or pain in front of these creatures that he believes he has control over. he isn’t brought to his knees until there are eight metal spikes embedded in his abdomen. he doesn’t let the mask fall for even a second, until he literally PUTS THE ACTUAL MASK ON and finally collapses. even then, he’s fighting for consciousness, twitching and writhing with no control over his body. william afton thrives on control, and his soul will not rest until he gets it back.
it’s why he keeps the pizzeria- he always comes back. he can’t help but return to the scene of the crime, putting on his old costume, continuing his killings. he revels in being a constant threat on the horizon. and now, he knows he is going to die, and he knows the suit will bring him back, and noone will be able to get rid of him then. so he puts the mask back on, and waits.
in terms of the sfx- they’re pretty accurate. with stab wounds, you need to leave the knife in the wound as long as possible for best chance of survival, as it stops the blood from escaping. in terms of the springlocks, there wouldn’t be copious amounts of blood as the locks are keeping the wounds filled- which is good because it means a slower, more painful death.
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I Won't Let You Leave - LN
Summary: Lando feels the relationship beginning to crumble so he scoops to a level of doing something he never thought he'd do but he's not sorry for it.
WARNINGS: This is DARK compared to my other stuff, Lando is toxic. So it may not be for everyone. Given the books I read, I could actually go much darker with ease, but equally I don't want to scare the fluff readers.
I also want to emphasise that I do not promote or believe the idea that babies keep people together. My existence is literally evidence of kids not being something that keeps people together so do not get it mixed up that is the message here. Also having finished this, I think this is the only dark fic I'm going to write like this bc personally I do prefer fluff. But I guess switching it up the once for a request was fine.
Themes: Baby trapping, manipulation into keeping the pregnancy, smut - cum/spit play (of the female variety?), birth control tampering, completely oblivious reader - she does not realise what Lando is up to
Someone messaged my after Change of Lifestyle and we went back and forth over what I'm ok writing so I don't have a direct request but this is requested by anon. Hope you like it, thank you for the request.
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Neither of them did anything. It wasn't anyone's fault. Sometimes people grow a part. Busy work life, time away from home, it coming to light that maybe they just don't fit together.
Wanting something to work doesn't mean it will.
Not unless you're more strategic and strong-willed. Completely happy to do everything and anything to keep that person in your life.
That's how far Lando is willing to go to keep y/n.
"Y/n?" Lando calls out as he gets into his apartment where he left y/n this morning. She has been growing more and more distant from him. Seeming to find any excuse to not spend time with him.
It hurts. But more than anything he wants to fix it with a permanent solution.
He sighs looking around the apartment and finding her nowhere till he spots a note on the kitchen counter.
Out for lunch x
No mention of who with, where or when she might be back.
He grumbles to himself as he moves to do some time on the sim. That's when he decides he's going to follow through on his recent idea of how to keep y/n. Admittedly he already managed to tamper with her pills since she takes them with her daily supplements and keeps them in a pill case. Managing to get his hands on more of her pills and replace the active pills with only the "week off" pills.
He spends nearly two hours on the sim before he hears the scuffling of his girlfriend's return to the apartment. Not announcing her entrance or making any effort to seek Lando out.
After a couple minutes he gets up , abruptly ending the race he'd been doing and moving through the apartment. Ready to make his move.
"Hey, baby." Lando smiles making her look up smiling back at him.
"Hey, I didn't realise you were back. Did you get my note?"
"Yeah, did you enjoy your lunch?"
"I did. Just a small lunch."
"Took quite a while. Who did you go with?" Lando asks moving around the back of y/n, planting a hand either side of her to rest on the counter
"Oh no one, just went shopping afterwards but nothing appealed to me to actually buy." Y/n hums shrugging a little, hairs on her neck prickling up at the feeling of his breath hitting her skin from his closing proximity. "How has your day been?"
"Good. I got something in mind to make it much better." Lando states kissing her neck. "Yeah?"
"Yeah." Y/n nods, never one to turn away sex. In fact even when they've argued it's usually sex that reconciles them.
Admittedly this isn't a romantic gesture and when he has her laid out on the counter, hot flustered and visibly dripping. Knowing what he's about to do, he almost feels a switch flick in him. Something more feral makes him want to leave his girlfriend in a way that means she's almost certainly getting pregnant today.
"So beautiful." Lando whispers leaning over her and gently brushing his lips down her skin, feeling it twitch under his touch.
Her moans feeling his tongue lick up her slit, it might not be a romantic move today but he wants to taste her. Nudging her clit. He's going to leave y/n fucked out till she's not sure if she's even breathing.
"Lando, fuck." Y/n whimpers as he pokes his fingers into her, curling to press into that spongy spot that makes her whole body tense a little. Wanting nothing more to plunge into her he decides to hurry up with the first orgasm of the day since he's got no intention of wasting time on this occasion.
He gets a little rougher in rushing but it only seems to work to his advantage and not only does she cum but she squirts into his mouth and in a heated moment of being blinded by lust, Lando moves up to be level with her. His lips press to her own before exchanging the cocktail of his spit and her cum into her mouth, hearing her moan from the action and tasting herself.
A couple seconds to get his cock out, painfully hard just from what happen. She feels him push into her, spasming and twitching around him from not quite expecting him to be so sudden but when he starts thrusting in and out of her as she pulls him closer in desperation from the feel of him managing to grind against her clit with each thrust.
Lando might not be looking for this to be romantic, but he'd never have sex and not go out of his way to make her feel like no one else can fuck her better.
Really, Lando thinks he could have sex with y/n for days. Just make her orgasm from his mouth, fingers or dick in rotation. Bring in toys if he feels like he's really spent.
Again the roughness seems to be building her up faster and Lando almost wonders if all this time he's been too soft and gentle with her.
When her tummy tenses and her eyes roll back before closing, he moves one hand down to her boob as his head moves to the other teeth pinching her nipple making her back arch up against him as a second orgasm arrives. He fights the need to finish himself since he knows two orgasms isn't enough to have her so out of it that she'll let his cum sit deep in her for as long as he sees fit.
He does take the opportunity with her lost in the euphoria of her orgasm to move her over to the sofa. Which leaves her breathlessly clinging onto him as he moves her over to the softer surface, positioning her on top of himself to straddle him while he leans back into the seat.
Y/n scrambles for grip feeling the different angle and with him fully enveloped in her, she just feels entirely filled. Heavy breaths exit her lips as she looks at him with slightly glazed eyes, clearly two orgasms hasn't exhausted her but them being one after another so quickly definitely made a dent in getting her to the point that she'll latch onto him and just sit there when he's done.
"You good to keep going?" Lando asks in a moment of softness, tucking hair behind her ear as he smiles at her.
"Yeah."
So he does, keeping himself fully planted in her and just toying with her clit till a third orgasm washes over her. Her face ends up landing in his neck till he finally begins lifting her up and down. Y/n usually gets two orgasms before Lando is done and it's not that she can't handle more, hell Lando could probably get 10 out of her before she'd actually tap out but he's sticking to four purely because he's not sure he can hang on for much longer.
"Cum with me baby." Lando groans, almost straining as the sound of skin on skin fills the space between their moaning and before he knows it she's practically strangling his cock, nails digging into his shoulders before they both feel the wet sticky heat of his cum fill her, hitting her cervix directly from the way he's holding her down firmly on himself. "Fuck me. That was perfect, baby."
"I just need a bit of...I need some time." Y/n murmurs breathlessly, obviously feeling there's no risk of sitting there as he slowly softens in her while she recovers.
"That's ok, you stay here as long as you need." Lando smirks while she rests her forehead on his shoulder.
She does fall asleep slumped forward against him.
-
Despite their sex lives picking up to multiple times a day if Lando can make it happen. Y/n is still distant beyond that. Seeming to find any excuse to not be close to Lando, avoid talking to him beyond a few minutes at a time and using any possible reason to leave the apartment if he's home.
Or so he thinks till he leaves for a race weekend on the Wednesday and she appears unannounced on the Saturday. She looks pale, almost grey and for the first time in months she's adorned in his clothes.
"Baby? I thought you didn't want to come to this race?" Lando questions feigning confusion and innocence. He can connect the dots, he knows she's on the verge of tears just looking at him. "What's going on?"
"Can we talk alone?" Y/n whispers putting the effort in to keep her voice steady but he can hear the trembling in her voice.
"Yeah, yeah. Of course we can." Lando nods before feeling her latch onto his hand. Suddenly he didn't realise how much he felt whole when she wanted and needed even something as simple as his touch.
He guides her through to his drivers room, closing the door and frowning gently at her.
"What's wrong baby? What's happening?"
"Lan-" Her lip begins to tremble and the tears build.
"Hey, it can't be that bad. What? Did you crash one of my cars or something?" Lando questions almost feeling bad for how he's acting so confused over why she is upset.
"I'm pregnant-I-I don't know what happened. I've been taking my pill. I've not missed a day or-or taking it at the wrong time-I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I just...I was being sick and I went to the doctor and the first thing they did was test if I was pregnant and it was positive so-so I booked the first flight over and I was sick on the flight and-"
"Ok, ok. Calm down. Just take breath baby, you're choking on words and and not breathing." Lando soothes gently hugging her while she hiccups and stutters then just falling against him and crying. "Baby, it's not a big deal. It's fine, I mean we're hardly financially strained and we're happy. Is a baby really a bad thing? I know it's not what we had planned but is it so bad?"
Y/n looks at Lando, eyes searching his face as if she doesn't believe that he's just uttered the words.
"Really? You-You're ok with it?"
"What did you think I was going to say? You'd have said if you wanted to get rid of the pregnancy and there's no way I'm just going to dump you when I love you." Lando frowns then cupping her face gently. "We'll do this together and I'll be here for you. Nothing is more important now."
"Not even if you have a race?"
"Not even if I have a race." Lando confirms then kissing her gently. "You and I, we're going to be together for a long time and we're going to be very very happy together. Soon we'll be a whole family."
"Ok." Y/n nods, tears still cloud her eyes ass he smiles nervously at him. She looks like she wants to say something. "I'm sorry."
"You have nothing to be sorry about."
"No. I do...I've-My friends have been getting in my head and so have the fans comments online. I haven't been talking to you about it and I've been dodging you because I thought I was crowding you and getting in your way...distracting you from being ready for the season. I just didn't want you to get annoyed at me."
Lando expects to feel some guilt discovering that the reason their relationship was struggling in his eyes was all because she was scared of being a problem in his F1 career and struggling with handling the hate from fans and then her stupid friends. He'll just have to do whatever it takes to prove that none of that matters.
"Your friends are just jealous. Jealous of what we have together, baby. They're probably going to get in your head about the pregnancy and all about me." Lando sighs gently playing with some strands of her hair. "If they're going to be like that I'd rather you just cut the toxic people out. We've got plenty of friends who aren't like that and who don't get jealous when you're living a good life."
Y/n swallows thickly at his words before nodding. Because he's right, she shouldn't be friend with those toxic jealous women who just want to ruin something good for her.
"You've got me too...I'm not going anywhere and I'm not going to ruin anything for us."
Lando knows he's got her locked in. He's just made sure that there is no one who is going to interfere with this and now they're having a baby, he'll get her a ring before the baby is born. They'll tie the knot after the baby is born and they'll be the most perfect little family.
And most importantly, she'll know she's his and he'll never worry about losing her again.
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ilwonuu · 1 month
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Hi!! Saw your post about stray kids and help for ideas and it’s been BUGGING ME FOR DAYS about how Chan reacts throughout the whole pregnancy
(I’m in my soft girl era with him rn and oh gods it’s killing me 😩❤️)
Also I love your works! :))❤️
i literally could not write this when you first requested bc i was busy at that moment. but its been on my brain i needed to write it asap THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING SOMETHING!!! i hope you like<3
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*°:⋆ₓₒ bangchan during your pregnancy ˚。⋆୨୧˚
☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆
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∘°∘♡∘°∘°.✩┈┈∘*┈˃̶୨୧˂̶┈*∘┈┈✩.° ∘°∘♡∘°∘
mentions sex, fluff!!! mdni
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✾ bangchan who is so excited when you tell him you’re pregnant. he even cries in your arms with happiness. “i can’t believe i’m gonna have a baby with you. you’re gonna be the best mom.”
✾ bangchan who is nervous about the news but is always strong for you.
✾ bangchan who is making sure you eat what you want and need whenever.
✾ bangchan who comes to you in your 7th week with baby names. him telling you that of course whatever name you two choose is the perfect one.
✾ bangchan who would never waste a moment to have his hands on you. his love language easily being shown with the way he acts towards you. any chance he has he is hugging you or kissing you.
✾ bangchan who loves your tummy. when you started to show he would be obsessed. always laying on your thighs so he is closer. he would always talk to your stomach. he would leave kisses all over your stomach to help you fall asleep.
✾ bangchan who loves to fuck you sweetly while your pregnant. him telling you how good it feels and how pretty you look.
✾ bangchan who always would eat your pregnancy cravings with you just for fun. he would tell you his opinions on them. always making sure you have what you need from the grocery store.
✾ bangchan who would realize the bad day you were having. he would cook you dinner and set a nice bath. making sure you get all the pampering you need to feel better.
✾ bangchan who gives you massages and legs rubs even when you don’t ask. he just wants an excuse to be close to you and for you to be relaxed.
✾ bangchan who constantly took photos of the two of you throughout pregnancy for memories. always adding that you look beautiful in the photos.
✾ bangchan who always was talking to his members about how happy is. always saying how much he loves you to them. (his members love you very much too) him also going to them when he did something to upset you.
✾ bangchan who always was patient with you when you’re upset or uncomfortable. he never got upset with you always listening to you and helping to make sure you’re feeling better. always resolving the conflicts and listening to you (even if you’re wrong lmfao)
✾ bangchan who always wakes up before you. his body picking up a routine so that if you need him he is awake when you get up.
✾ bangchan who gets a bunch of gifts for you and the baby randomly. saying he doesn’t need a reason to spoil you.
✾ bangchan who stresses so much when you tell him your water broke. him gathering every single thing you need and getting you to the hospital.
✾ bangchan who holds your hand and never leaves your side as you go into labour. him whispers to you telling you what a perfect job your doing.
✾ bangchan who cries in the hospital room when he holds your baby for the first time. his reaction causing you to cry with him.
✾ bangchan who is the happiest person in the world when you two take your baby home.
✾ bangchan who is spending his time with you two as much as possible. always telling you he loves you 100 times a day.
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norrisleclercf1 · 8 months
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Hey, so I saw that your request were open and I was thinking if you could something for the our boy series, bcs I just love dad Lando so much. Ok, so we know that Caleb's second name is max, could u write something about that, like Max's finding out and how he reacts, or just a cute moment between the Norris family and the grid.
A/N: Okay, I knew you meant Mini Lando Series because you said the right people for that series, but yes I would love to expand on how Max reacted to finding out that Lando named his second born after him
Mini Lando Series
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In the beginning you didn't tell anyone you gave birth, just wanting Aiden and the two of you to settle into a new routine. Caleb was a relatively easy baby, never really fussed and slept most of the time.
He was the perfect baby, but you knew not everyone was the same. When you started to tell people, yours and Lando's family came to visit first, after that you allowed the drivers to start visiting.
Carlos, Charles, Pierre, and Lewis all came to visit first. Carlos of course, helping the two of you with Aiden, his godson. Charles and Pierre bringing way to many gifts, and Lewis with far to many Mercedes gear for your children, something Lando promised to burn.
Yet he couldn't when Aiden became attached to a bright neon bucket hat. Lando swears he thinks, it's because Aiden believes it's one of his own bucket hats not Lewis's.
He can keep thinking that.
The one Lando was nervous about visiting is Max. He wasn't sure how the Dutch driver would react to him naming his son after him. How was he to tell Max, he did it because he always believed in him. That he was a friend, a brother to him.
Carlos rolled his eyes at the name, saying Aiden's was far much better. You didn't know which toddler was yours, Carlos or Aiden.
So when the doorbell rang, Lando bolted to the door. Opening it he sees Kelly, Penelope, and Max all with gifts for you and the baby. Kelly comes to you first, checking on you while Aiden and Penelope run off to play.
Max and Lando follow slowly behind, making small talk about the upcoming season. Lando hearing soft crying, goes to get Caleb. Max joins you and Kelly on the couch, asking you how you felt, if you ever needed Aiden to stay with them, he's more than welcome.
Walking into the room, Kelly beams seeing the tiny human in Lando's arms. It still freaks Max out that this kid, someone he watched grow up, is married with kids. Freaked him out.
Lando hands Caleb over to Kelly who just sways back and forth. Max watches, thinking the little stinker was adorable, but totally took after you. Kelly hands Caleb to Max, whose large hands engulf Caleb's little body.
He admires the little boy, but his eyes settle onto the initials on Caleb's little onesie. C.M.N
"What's his full name?" Max asks, Lando looking like a deer caught in headlights, you smile trying to muffle the laughter bubbling in your chest behind your hand. "What? Is it bad name? Lando, you can't name your kids with bad names, they'll get bullied." Max sighs, thinking it's after some video game or worse a car.
"Maxemilian." Max makes a face, looking up at Lando who takes a deep breath. "Caleb Maxemilian Norris. That's his full name." Kelly gasps, catching it instantly but Max remains oblivious.
"Maxemilian? Lando, that's a stupid name." He grumbles, looking down at the baby currently holding his finger. "That's your name, you dumbass." Kelly gently smacks Max's shoulder.
"That's not my name, my name is Max Emili- OH!" The lightbulb going off in his head leaving you and Kelly in a fit of giggles, but Lando shuffles around, Max left in a state of shock.
"You named him after me?" The question soft, the most vulnerable look every on Max's face, a mix of love and shock. "Well, yeah." Lando groans. "You've....you've always believed in me, cheered me on, supported me through everything. Hell you and Carlos even helped me buy Y/n's engagement ring. Why wouldn't I? You're family." Max hands Caleb off to you, the little boy cuddling into you, knowing it's you.
"Are you going to hit me? Just not the face." Lando squeaks, closing his eyes tight, instead Max wraps his arms around Lando. His muscles relax, hugging the Dutch driver back, the two of them saying nothing.
"If you cry, we need picture proof." You tease the men pulling apart, Max wiping his eyes quick so you don't notice. "Thank you, just...thank you." Max smiles clapping Lando on the back.
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augustvandyne · 2 months
Note
Hey! could you please right a natasha x wife r? Idk if you remember when the avengers have to take refuge and they have to go to clints house (he's reluctant bc he has a secret family only nat knows about)? well could you write it so it's actually nats family that no one knows about? and she's super reluctant to take them there
everyone's alive and no one knew she had a family (not even clint) and the timeline is SUPER wack bc plot twist, yelenas already there. the avengers are hurt nat didn't tell them and they're kinda mad too
nats wife doesn't like having them there bc it's her home and they're putting them all in more danger then they normally are in. the kids don't like them either bc they 'take their mom away' or something like that (but the kids adooore their aunt yelena)
this is super long I'm sorry but the idea has been plaguing my head and I feel like it would be fun to read about. thank you and have a great day!
hi! yes! don’t worry about it being too long, i’ll listen to and write whatever thoughts you have.
safehouse
You and Yelena were baking a cake when pack of Avengers came piling through the front door.
You were expecting Natasha later in the week, and alone. Not with the danger that is literally standing in your doorway.
That was the best part of this place, there was no danger. Nat left work at work, and when she came home all she focused on was her family—you, Yelena, and your two lovely children.
So you were definitely surprised, and not happy, to see the other five Avengers.
You walk further into the living room, and when Nat sees you, her face is immediately apologetic.
“Babe—“
“Who are all these people?” Yelena comes and stands beside you in the living room, staring up at all the men.
“This is Steve, Clint, Tony, Thor, and Bruce. They’re my friends,” Natasha shrugs.
“Uh, no, we’re not your friends now,” Clint crosses his arms with sass.
“They’re the Avengers,” You correct your wife. “And they shouldn’t be here.”
“Listen, I wasn’t going to even bring them here, but—“
“It’s our fault, ma’am,” Steve interrupted.
“Oh, here we go,” Tony throws his hands in the air.
“What?” Steve whines.
“First the language, and now the manners. Good god,” Tony rolls his eyes.
“Okay, take it elsewhere. More preferably, back to where you came from,” You fake smile, earning a glare from Nat.
“Where are the kids?” Nat asks, and you get the feeling she needs to talk. Alone.
“Upstairs in the playroom. Yelena, why don’t you take them outside to play on the swing set?” You ask sweetly.
“Ah, gotcha,” Yelena gave a look to Natasha that said, good luck.
The kids say hello to Nat, made faces at the men still in your living room, and then squealed with joy out the door because their mama is home.
You looked away from the door and back up at the Avengers once again. Nat softly grabs you by the arm and pulls your towards the other side of the living room.
“What are they doing here, Nat?” You lean closer, your foreheads slightly touching.
“I had no other choice,” Natasha’s raspy voice makes it hard not to forgive her.
You sigh and purse your lips.
“Really,” Nat insists. “If there was any other choice, I would have made it. We just got into a little trouble, and need to camp out for a few days.”
You made a vow not to ask what trouble she was in, so you kept your mouth shut when she says this.
“Okay. But if there’s even a little bit of damage to the house, they are paying for it,” You lift your head up and walk back towards the group, Natasha following close behind.
Nat glances your way, then back at the boys, “We can stay here. But only for a few days.”
“So this is where Lady Natasha goes every time she takes off,” Thor nods.
“Yes. A home we didn’t even know about?” Bruce shakes his head.
“I can’t believe you never told me,” Clint looks genuinely hurt when Nat looks at him. “I thought we were friends.”
“Yeah, what he said,” Tony puts his hand on his chest.
You roll your eyes and head back to the kitchen before the cake burns, letting your wife deal with her friends/fellow Avengers.
You finish the frosting Yelena had started, and ice the cake once it comes out of the oven. You then start on dinner. Something easy everyone can enjoy—pasta.
Dinner goes about as well as you thought it would.
Nat and the kids catch up. She just saw them a week or so ago, so there isn’t much to catch up, but you love watching Natasha play and talk with the kids.
You try not to laugh as the kids keep making faces at the guys.
Your daughter starts to kick Tony in the shin, to which him and your daughter start having a staring contest.
“Okay, what are you guys doing?” Nat asked.
“Your tiny agent keeps kicking me,” Tony says, never taking his eyes off the smaller girl.
“Okay she’s not an agent, and it’s probably because you take her mother away every chance you get,” You sighed with frustration. “Good she’s kicking you, maybe you’ll leave then.”
“Y/n—“
“I’m sorry,” You look at your wife. “I said it was okay, even though you’re putting us it more danger. But, I will try to be civil, but only for Natasha.”
“Thank you.”
Later in the night you had assigned everyone to places in the house to spend the night.
Yelena had volunteered to spend the night with the kids, so at least two people could bunk in there, and it was fine by you because the kids adored Yelena.
So two people slept in Yelena’s room, you had one in the living room, and two in the guest room downstairs.
“They are mad at me, you know?” Nat brushed through her hair.
“They’ll get over it. It’s a safe house,” You wrap your arms around her waist from behind. “You are supposed to keep it secret.”
“I know,” Nat turns so you two are face to face. “I love you, and thank you for letting us stay here. We’ll be out of her in two days, tops.”
“Good,” You plant a kiss on the side of Natasha’s mouth.
“But I might not be back for a while,” Nat cups your cheek in her hand.
“I had a feeling,” You look down.
“I’ll just have to make it up to you.”
“How about you start now?” You lift a brow and squeal as your wife picks you up and puts you on the bed.
Danger aside, you loved having your wife back in your arms, and you were granted with just that from this crazy mission.
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lees-chaotic-brain · 3 months
Note
How would jjk men react to reader being pregnant with quadruplets?
Feat. Gojo, Yuta, Inumaki, Nanami, Megumi, Itadori (all characters are aged up)
Note: I did headcanons for this request because there were so many characters I wanted to include, and it would get a little boring to write the same scenario out in a full fledged fic like seven times. However, if there are one or two that you want me to turn into proper fics lmk!! I had to do research on pregnancy for this bc it's been awhile since my high school health class
CW: pregnancy, implied thoughts of abortion ig, mentions of fear regarding labor, AFAB reader bc, yk, pregnancy, one singular swear word
Word Count: 1.2k
JJK Masterlist | Blog Navigation
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Gojo
I feel like Gojo would think you were joking at first, and wouldn’t believe you until you got frustrated and he finally realized you were being for real. He would have mixed emotions. On one hand, he was excited to have a big family and a house full of laughter and love. On the other hand, he was afraid, because more babies meant more defenseless mini-people for him to protect.
He had only known that he was going to be a father of quadruplets a few minutes ago, but he already knew that it would destroy him if he ever lost one of them. That he would gladly give his life for them. And then there was the matter of you. He already knew that childbirth was difficult for women, but quadruplets?? Childbirth was something that even he couldn’t protect you from and that terrified him. 
After a serious discussion in which he made sure you were okay with the added risks and you continuously reassured him that this was what you wanted, he settled down and began imagining a future for your family. Until he realized that he would have to share your love with four little gremlins who would surely take after their clingy father. Then it suddenly seemed less appealing.
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Yuta
Baby boy would be shooketh. Because he’s sorry please don’t be mad at him and oh you’re not mad at him and the two of you are having quadruplets well technically you are but he’s the dad and oh god what if he’s not good at being a dad and-
You would have to calm him down as he fell into a downward spiral. Once you had properly reassured him, and he had fully absorbed the information he was ecstatic. He has always wanted a big family, and together the two of you were making that dream come true. Cuddling up to you he would thank you for loving him and gifting him with the many kids he had always dreamed of having.
He for sure would be the type to rub your stomach and whisper sweet nothings to the growing babies in your womb, telling them how much daddy loves them and how excited he is to meet them.
He would also start baby-proofing every square inch of your house before you had even started your second trimester.
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Inumaki
He would be in shock. Because he put- wait how many??? babies in you. There was no way he heard you right. There was no way that you were pregnant with quadruplets. Because, wait, he didn't sign up for this! Yeah, he wanted tons of kids, but four babies at a time was a lot. And the strain it would have on your body was concerning as well. 
After he stopped opening and closing his mouth as he gaped at you, he managed to organize his thoughts. First he wanted to make sure you even wanted that many kids because, well, it wouldn’t be easy to give birth to or take care of that many. Once you had reassured him that you were, in fact, sure that you wanted to go through with the pregnancy and that you were prepared for whatever the future held for your not-so-little family he took a moment to process his own emotions.
At first he was conflicted. Sure he was excited, but he held his own private reservations. What if something went wrong during labor? What if he wasn’t cut out to be the parent of one kid, let alone four. But as the months sped by and your stomach grew, the anticipation grew, until one day he let go of any and all trepidation and allowed himself to be optimistic.
He also bought tons of matching onesies for the whole family.
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Nanami
Ever the responsible adult and caring husband, first he sat you down and had a serious discussion about the pros and cons of having quadruplets, and whether or not the risks were worth it. Deep down he was thrilled, but he wanted to make sure the two of you were on the same page and understood what continuing meant.
Once the two of you had established you were going to see this through, and it was something the two of you wanted his planning would begin. First came the research. He thoroughly educated himself on everything regarding pregnancy, learning everything he needed to do to ensure your comfort and the healthy birth of his children.
Expect a special diet plan that fulfills the needs of you and your unborn children in the healthiest way possible, essential oil massages, weekly check-ups starting your second trimester, vitamin gummies and more.
He also would begin saving up because raising four children would be expensive. Would for sure have a whole financial plan set up and college savings accounts set up for each of his children within a week of his learning.
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Megumi
Honestly, he wouldn’t have super strong feelings about it. He wanted to be a dad, but he didn’t care if it was one, four, or one hundred. He just wanted to have kids with you, and beyond that as long as you were happy he was too. 
So when you told him, his only response was asking you what you thought about it. When you told him you were excited, he was excited too. He had wanted to build his own family for as long as he could remember, and you were helping him reach his dream. What more could he ask for? The only other thing that mattered to him was that his children had siblings. As a kid he had resented Tsumiki, but as an adult he couldn’t imagine the loneliness he would have experienced growing up without her. So yeah. If you were happy, and his children would have siblings so they would never have to walk through life alone, he was content.
There was nothing more he wanted in life than your love and a family with you.
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Itadori
Kids!!! He had wanted a ton of kids, so this was perfect! You were happy with it, so even better! He sees it as a four-in-one deal, and is over the moon. His golden retriever personality becomes even worse when you’re pregnant. Like, this man is at your side 24/7.
Constantly following you around, looking at you with big pleading eyes as he begs to cuddle in bed with you so he can talk to your stomach.
Oh my god talking to your stomach. This man would talk to your stomach more than he talks to you. Asking what your kids want to be named. Telling your unborn babies about his day. That he loves them and can’t wait to meet them. Describes all the fun things the six of you are going to do once they’re born. Definitely tries cuddling your stomach because he ‘wants to know what it feels like to hold his children.’
Also is a little shit that constantly asks ‘are they coming yet? Why not??’
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shogunish · 4 months
Text
𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗴𝗼𝗷𝗼𝘀 & 𝗶. [𝟬𝟮]
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synopsis. satoru knows you're the closest thing to a mother megumi will ever have.
contents. reader battles with a kitchen stove (it was funnier in my head), a lil' bit of megs/reader bonding, soft and tired toru
words. 1.1k
note. pls lmk what you think bc i feel like my writing has gone 📉📉📉 but anyways, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE LOML, THE APPLE OF MY EYE, MY GLORIOUS BLUE EYED KING 💕
comments and reblogs are highly appreciated! <3
previous || next
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as promised, you're watching over megumi for the day. he's a quiet and somewhat shy kid who doesn't talk too much, but you're certain the little guy will warm up to you once he sees you around more often. you can't blame him; after all, you're basically a stranger in his home who's suddenly spending time with him until he passes out and satoru comes back home from work. you'd be a little reserved as well if you were in his shoes.
“so megumi, what would you like for dinner?” you kneel down to megumi's height and flash him a kind smile, head tilted to the side and hair framing your face.
megumi regards you for a moment as if he doesn't really want to say what he wants, but the smile on your face, the warmth you exude is enough for him to speak up. if he already gets to choose, he better make it count. “..macaroni.” he says, a pout on his lips.
“macaroni it is, buddy.” ruffling megumi's hair, you're quick to move through the kitchen, finding the noodles, preparing two pots and filling one of them with the right amount of water. everything goes as planned until you're faced with that fancy kitchen stove that does absolutely not work like the one you own.
damn satoru and the salary he uses to buy expensive shit like this.
you know it's a touchscreen model, but whenever you do put your finger down and the thing beeps..nothing happens. the stovetop doesn't even turn red to indicate that it's on and so you put your finger down a couple more times only for nothing to happen.
a lump sits in the back of your throat, cold sweat coats the tip of your finger. your heart skips a beat. if you can't even figure out how to operate your newfound nemesis of a stove, megumi would go to bed hungry and satoru would definitely be severely disappointed in you!
you can't let the attractive single dad think you're useless.
you cannot let megumi starve.
stuck in your own panic, you fail to notice how megumi has watched your..conflict by peeking over the countertop. even his dogs give you a somewhat confused look as if they could sense your emotional distress over a stove of all things. the boy walks over, nudges himself between you and your self-proclaimed nemesis and brings his finger down on the touchscreen of the stove like he's never done anything else in his life.
beep. beep, beep.
apparently, it's that easy to get the water to cook.
dumbfounded, you stare at megumi, then at the stove and back at megumi. you have to look hilarious with your lips parted into an o-shape and your eyebrows almost shooting up to your hairline if megumi's little laugh is anything to go by. “..that's amazing..how did you–”
megumi shrugs his shoulders, his usual deadpan expression back on his face. “i always watch dad when he cooks. it's not..that hard.”
you groan out loud, but a little chuckle laces into the sound. “..i'm too old for this stuff.” with pouted lips, you let megumi explain how to increase and decrease the heat, how to turn the stove off and on. it really is a lot easier than you initially believed.
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when satoru finally comes home, the skies are already darkening. hues of dark blue and a hint of purple are slathered across the vast canvas, birds roaming through the air and seemingly returning home to their nests or whatever place they consider home for the night. for a moment, the bustling life of the city ceases to exist – at least until satoru would have to leave for work again.
no emails, no phone calls, no meetings.
clad in suit and tie, buttons opened and tie loosened, a sigh of relief sneaks past his pale lips when the warmth of his apartment welcomes him home. a place which was usually silent, almost void of any life since megumi would be in bed by now. but now, the scent of food lingers in the air, soft snores echo from the living room down the hallway and the tv dimly illuminates the cozy space. driven by curiosity and a grumbling stomach, satoru finds a plate of macaroni on the dining table. in front of it, a note is placed.
“i figured you might be hungry after work. all you have to do is warm it up :]”
cerulean eyes soften behind pitch black shades as they skim over the carefully written note and the silly smiley you drew at the end. you didn't have to do this. satoru could take care of himself, he's been doing it for as long as he can remember, but..in a way, it's nice to be thought of, cared for, even in such small ways you probably didn't put much thought into.
he likes it. likely, a lot more than he should.
satoru trudges over to the sofa in the living room, wanting to thank you for the food, but when he sees you passed out on the cushion, megumi cuddled up to your chest and the two dogs snoring at your feet, the ghost of a smile dances on his lips. you look absolutely exhausted, a bit of drool leaking from the corner of your lips and red crayon smeared on your cheek, but it kind of looks cute on you, satoru thinks.
the sound of disney's bambi on the tv is nothing but white noise as satoru's gaze shifts towards his son, his little bundle of joy. the boy who never had a mother appears so content with his little arms clutching his favorite plushie and his little face buried in the warmth of your chest, snoring just as loudly as the dogs. the kid is beat, just like you.
satoru has to shake his head. ever since megumi was born, satoru wanted nothing more than for him to experience the love of a mother. someone who would offer him unconditional love, attention, would care for him and his happiness in ways that only a mother can, but you are not his mother. you never will be.
in the end, you're still the cute neighbor next door who offered to lend him a hand out of pity and not someone who could act as megumi's mother.
and yet, satoru knows he made the right choice by accepting your help.
this is the closest thing megumi will ever have to a mother.
a sigh, heavy enough to be conflicted but quiet enough to drown into the late hours, slips past satoru's lips. with quiet steps, he fetches a blanket from his bedroom and tosses the soft fabric over megumi's and your sleeping form.
"thank you." he breathes out, voice barely above a whisper.
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taglist. @torusmochi, @ayanominitrash, @erigaur
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pupyuj · 2 months
Note
GP! Yujin "accidentally" (girl never wears condoms who we kidding) knocking you up 🙊 now you have to tell her about being a possible baby daddy🤭 what if I say she might be into it🤔👀 like her thoughts drift to you walking around carrying HER kid for the next few months. 🤭She's possessive your honor😊 honestly her reaction is totally up to you
- 🧇
oddly enough i enjoyed writing this ask but mostly bcs it's on the softer side lmao 😭 might be the only time i indulge in something involving pregnancy but who knows! baby daddy yuj was just something i could NOTTTT pass up 😳
[cw: pregnancy!, lactation kink.]
oh my god she would be flabbergasted??? 😭 yujinnie likes to tell you that she'll give you babies whenever the two of you fuck but 78% of the time she doesn't mean it!! 😣 so one day when you sit her down and tell her you're pregnant and that you have absolutely no plans to 'get rid' of the baby... well, yujin was literally speechless 😭 but she wouldn't hate it... in fact seeing you so confident about your decision to keep her child really helped her come to her own conclusion about this whole situation herself! you best believe she'll raise tf outta that baby with you 😤💕
anw back to the nasty stuff—yk how turned on yujin would be afterwards?? just staring at you while you go about your day... her boner situation so fucking bad bcs she can't stop thinking about the night she put that baby inside you... and you don't even have your little bump yet but she acts like you do!! she's always caressing your stomach while making out, makes sure to plant the sweetest kisses on it before she goes down on you too! :3
every time she's staring she's so desperate to knock you up again that she just wants to bend you over and fuck you but she gets kinda afraid?? 😭 yujinnie doesn't want to hurt you or the baby so she refrains from doing anything too crazy... but then you'd tell her that you'll both be careful so that none of you three will get hurt and suddenly she's back to being a huge fucking pervert! oh and don't even get met started on how she acts when your tits start leaking... lord.
yujin would have you sat on her lap all the time, your shirt off and perky nipples on her mouth,,, yujin has no problem getting messy with it too!! sucking on your nipples like she’s the baby 😭😭😭 makes a joke about your tits drying up by the time the kid gets here bcs she really does get addicted to them! 😵‍💫 sometimes it gets annoying how she just wants to touch you all the time but most of your anger comes from the mood swings 😭😭 all yujin has to do is kiss you and pull you around for a dance with fun music playing in the background and you’ll be fine! 🥰
about the possessive thing… well yes! 😵‍💫 yujin also gets overprotective to the point it becomes something the two of you argue about… 😭 daddy will be nagging at you a lot but that’s bcs she’s only concerned about you and the kid!! most of the time you can’t even get mad at her bcs yujin’s just being a good daddy mommy 🥺 see, she’s usually so haughty and reckless but getting you pregnant would definitely bring out a sweeter side of yujin that you’ll fall in love w her all over again 😔💕
okay now she really needs to breed me—[SIRENS BLARING]
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sserajeans · 6 months
Text
mine
kim minji x fem! reader
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synopsis: you both knew love came with downhills, but neither of you thought it'd get that bad. you made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter, and she's the best thing you could ever call 'mine'.
genre + others: non-idol reader x idol minji, goes over the ups and downs of their relationship, semi angst but fluff end TRUST ME
notes: (TW: implied suicide of minor character) , y/n has been through so much pls give her a break, idk if either of them were toxic, but they work around it bc love >>>, not requested, i was just listening to the album and got an idea that made my soul go WHOOSH hehe, THIS IS A VERY LONG ONE
WORD COUNT: 6.9k
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you were in college, working part-time, waiting tables. left a small town, never looked back. i was a flight risk, with a fear of fallin', wondering why we bother with love, if it never lasts.
you and minji were your friend group's favorite couple. almost anyone would agree, actually.
you met in high school when you transferred from a smaller, almost unknown town under a merit scholarship sponsored by the school. you were your family's pride and joy, the eldest daughter and older sister to two siblings. your parents weren't born with the same comfort they provided you and your siblings, or any comfort at all. it took a lot of work for them to get to where they were, and even then they still work day and night to give a life better than theirs for their children.
being born first, you witnessed everything. the blood, sweat, and tears your parents poured into everything; their failed start-up business, their multiple part-time jobs, and the low-paying wages they'd get in return. but above all this, you also saw how your parents did it all for love. love for you, love for their kids, love for the family they made. and so you swore, as an adorable 8-year-old, that you'd work your hardest and earn enough money to get your parents to rest comfortably once they were of age. you were raised in a struggling house, but a loving home. you knew love. you weren't a stranger to it. you loved love and the power it held.
minji, on the other hand, didn't. when you met her in your first year of high school, her parents had just signed divorce papers after her dad caught her mother cheating. she was only 16 at the time, and her parents were her role models of love. to her, they represented what love would, could, and should be. she believed in love, until she grew to hate it. she hated the way it hurt her father, she hated the way it hurt her, but most of all she hated the way it pulled her mother away from her. minji knew love. she wasn't a stranger to it. but she hated love and the power it held.
because of the stark difference you two had with your outlooks on love, it was a shock to everyone when the kim minji agreed to not just being your prom date, but to you courting her during your junior year of high school as well. 
“kim minji is this really you?” her best friend at the time, seol yoona, waved her hand in front of the raven-haired girl’s face. she was trying to finish an essay in english, one of their final requirements for the semester. “what’s different about park y/n?”
minji sighed and closed her notebook, finally facing the rest of her friends who sat crowded around her.
“look. she was nice to me at prom and she’s…” her friends’ eyes widened in anticipation. “cute, i guess.”
“oh come on minji that can’t be just it…”
“yeah you rejected like a quarter of the student population! i’m sure there were a few nice and cute ones!”
“they all…” minji started as she stood up from her desk and began packing her things in her backpack. “i’m just more comfortable with her, okay? we’ve been friends a while, and she’s patient about everything right now because she knows about…”
the rest of the table nodded their heads in understanding. there was no need for her to expound on that. 
meanwhile, in the complete opposite side of the school campus, was where you and your two closest friends ate lunch. under the shade of the courtyard’s largest tree.
"you're fucking playing with me..."
"i'm not! she said yes! she really did!" you exclaimed, mouth full of the school's spam and kimchi kimbap. 
"you better not mess this up y/n... you're like the first person i know of that she's ever said yes to." your other friend commented, playfully shoving your upper arm.
"do you guys not have like... the teeny-tiniest bit of faith in me?" 
they looked at you for a solid minute before nodding and shrugging. jokes aside, you were a selfless and caring person, and every one that has ever gotten to know you was sure of that.
and fair enough, by your first year of college which was also minji's first year as newjeans' leader, after almost 2 years of courting her, you asked her to have things official, and she said yes.
do you remember, we were sitting there by the water? you put your arm around me for the first time. you made a rebel of a careless man’s careful daughter. you are the best thing, that’s ever been mine.
it had been just over a year since you two started officially dating, and nothing much changed since you put a label on it. you were now in your second year of university, simultaneously maintaining a part-time job at a local restaurant. 
it didn’t take an idiot to know that dating an idol was hard. and it also didn’t help that your schedule wasn’t the most flexible either. there were even some days where minji had more time in the week to spend than you did. the both of you hated that, and it frustrated you two to the point where there were times you’d take it out on each other.so when you and minji had your first big argument, it was a shock to none of the peers who knew of your relationship.
you sighed deeply as you unlocked the door to your apartment. it was the middle of midterms week, and you had just finished an evening shift. you didn’t even want to think about studying for your calculus exam tomorrow, but you knew you had to if you wanted to keep your gpa up to the scholarship’s requirements.
“park y/n.” minji’s voice interrupted your brain’s train of thought. you were so busy trying to figure out the most efficient way to spend the rest of the time between the present and your exam. 
usually, minji’s voice calling your name would be warm and sweet. you talked about it to your friends one time, describing it as melted chocolate, and she gagged at how cheesy you were being. but god forbid you speak the truth.
but now, her voice was neither warm nor sweet. it was cold. it was cold and sharp. if you had the time to process it you’d probably describe it as ice shards, rather than melted chocolate.
you hesitated to face her, because you knew exactly why she was here in your apartment at 11pm in the evening instead of her dorms, fast asleep. you couldn't count how many times you cancelled a date last minute within the last month, and minji was tired of you not explaining properly.
you heard her stand up from the living room couch and walk towards you in the dining table. 
“what is it, minji?” you spoke, leaning your forehead against your palm as you brought out school textbooks and worksheets.
“what do you mean ‘what is it, minji’? you know why i’m here, y/n.” 
she wasn’t lying. again, you knew why she was here with you, which is why you dreaded the conversation that was about to come.
“this is the 4th date you’ve cancelled this month without telling me why. if you wanted to break up i’d much rather you tell me directly…” the last sentence felt like a stab to your chest. the cold and sharp dagger that was her words, taking one large hit.
“what the fuck? no, okay! no i don’t!”
“then for the love of god would you at least tell me why you’re being so fucking distant?!” 
you kept silent. eyes avoiding hers as you internally debated on whether you wanted to burden her with your struggles or not.
“see? you can’t even say it.”
“fucking hell. my sister is sick, minji.” 
you let out a shaky exhale as you spoke, finally gathering the courage to face her.
“she has pneumonia. she’s sick. she’s in the hospital. and i-“ you cut yourself off as tears made its way down your face. the cold exterior on minji’s face dropped almost immediately at the sound of your voice breaking. your breathing remained shaky as you tried your best to verbalize everything that has been piling up over the past few weeks.
“medical insurance isn’t enough to cover it. my parents are working endlessly, but they’re getting older and i don’t want them to overwork themselves or they could get sick too, so i asked if i could pick up more shifts at the restaurant because that’s really all i can do right now. it just breaks my heart whenever i visit her because she’s always telling me that she’s sorry for causing trouble when none of it was her fault. and fuck, as if it doesn’t get any worse it’s midterms week, and if i fail just one exam it’s enough to bring my gpa down for the school to drop me.”
you gasped for air.
the girl sat beside you and rubbed your back, reaching over for your water bottle and offering it to you. you muttered a thanks as you gulped down half of the water inside and gave yourself a few seconds to speak again.
“and i know what you’re thinking. ‘why didn’t you tell me? i could’ve helped.’ but minji please. you’re an idol. you’re a celebrity. fuck, you’re the leader of one of the biggest group’s right now. you have enough on your plate. i don’t want to add to that.”
minji nodded to show you she was listening despite not saying anything since you started letting it out.
"let's take a walk." 
you were shocked by the suggestion, and minji could tell. she would be too.
“but won’t people recogn-“
"more air to breathe, more space to think. come on." she got your coat for your and brought your most comfortable pair of shoes over.
you weren't agreeing, but you also weren't objecting the idea. from what could've been a fight to this, you were just glad you had the warm minji with you right now.
she dragged you along by the hand, just a few steps ahead of you. it didn't take too long until you two found yourselves sitting on the park bench facing a small river. it wasn't too far away, just a couple meters from your apartment building.
“can i ask you something, y/n?” there it was. the warmth, the sweetness in her voice. 
she turned to face you. “do i bother you when i tell you about my problems? when i talk to you about how i worry for haerin not opening up, or when i tell you about how hanni might’ve bothered me on a certain day. does that burden you?”
you looked up at her shaking your head, your eyes still red and puffy. 
“w-what? no. never. i like that you let me know. i like knowing you have some type of output for it."
"well if it doesn't burden you then what makes you think you'd burden me?"
you slowly looked away, eyes busy gazing the clear water and the rocks that laid under.
she moved to wrap her right arm over your shoulders, and slowly reached for your left hand to hold if you'd let her. after all, she didn't expect to be comforting you when she planned on seeing you.
"i may be an idol. i may be a celebrity. i may be newjeans' minji a lot of the time. but i'm also your girlfriend, park y/n. the one you met in high school whose life you changed forever the day you asked me to prom." you leaned against her when she pulled you closer as she spoke.
"i stopped believing in love when my parents split. remember when i told you that? but you were there every step of the way. you understood, and you were fine with waiting." minji took a pause to make sure you were still with her, listening. 
your eyes were heavy, but your brain couldn’t be more alive. 
“y/n, i don't want to be the person that makes their partner feel like they can't talk to them. let me be there for you too, okay? i may not be able to do a lot to fix it, but i'll be there because you shouldn't be facing things alone. not when you have me."
you nodded, letting out the last of your tears on her shoulder while she ran her fingers through your hair. 
“so next time, please, please tell me what bothers you.”
you never gave a clear response, just your sobs slowing down as she held you. minji would later on regret not noticing this.
a few minutes later, after you calmed down, you pulled away to finally fix your eyes on hers.
"thank you. and i still owe you an apology. for how i was the past couple of weeks.”
“you really don’t have to y/n.”
“well, you say that now after i told you. but what i did was still such… an ass move, and i should’ve told you what was going on because you deserved to know with the way it affected you too.”
minji gave you a smile. a small smile that held the largest emotions a human could ever feel. she leaned against your side, head on your left shoulder with her arm around your waist.
“it’s okay…”
“i love you.”
three words. eight letters. the first time it was ever said between the two of you. 
on the inside, you were a little shocked. if your relationship was a sports game, no one would bet on minji saying it first. but she did. and that just made those special words mean a little more than they already did.
you wrapped your left arm around her shoulders and rested your head on hers, giving the top of her head a kiss before saying it back.
“i love you too.”
flash forward and we’re taking on the world together. and there’s a drawer of my things at your place.
a couple months later, you felt on top of the world, and so did minji. you found a higher paying stay-at-home job, your sister got better miraculously quick, and your grades were stellar. for minji, newjeans had just released another hit mini album, and it was played everywhere you went. in the store, at the mall, on tiktok, on the radio. everywhere.
eventually, you two found a free spot on both of your schedules, and used it to have sleepovers at your apartment or her dorm. she’d always prefer staying at yours though. one of the few times you stayed at hers, the second you left, hanni and hyein were teasing her endlessly about… well, usual couple stuff.
this night was one of those sleepover nights. the two of you just finished dinner and were cuddling on the sofa, trying to decide on a movie to watch.
“mean girls?”
“didn’t we watch that last week?” minji reasoned out, looking at you with a questioning face.
“uhm… horror?”
“i don’t mind.”
you hummed and browsed through the horror collection your streaming site had. it took you a while to find a movie, you and minji each always had a minor problem with whatever came up.
“oh hey this one looks fun. zom-“
“did i ever tell you the full story of my parents?”
“ha?”
you looked at her with a rather surprised expression on your face. sure, she’s told you all about being a child of divorced parents and how it affected her. but you never bothered to ask more about it in fear of her discomfort.
“well… no. i wanted you to bring things up at your own pace.”
it felt like a silent agreement that maybe you two were going to drop the movie for a little “deep talk” moment.
“my dad went m.i.a., well, sort of did, on my mom.” she began, you sat cross-legged beside her, reaching for her hand to play with while she muttered a quick ‘thanks’. it was your little show of comfort. 
her parents was a subject that you two didn’t bring up very often. she’d mention them once in a while, like when you were preparing a dish that reminded her of her mom’s cooking, or when you came over to help fix hyein’s bike like her dad used to do for her. but it was never in the subject of the divorce. you two always had more to talk about when you were together anyways.
“he lost a lot of the money in their savings, and he’d never talk to my mom about it thinking he could cover it up soon enough. mom was convinced he was cheating and was sending money to another girl. even after my dad explained everything she just… went and did what she did. until he caught her and… well, you know the rest.”
minji was surprisingly calm throughout the whole storytelling. you figured it must’ve been from keeping it in for so long, finally letting the old wounds heal.
“wow…”
“yeah, ‘wow’.”
“i’m sorry, i just…” you paused and grabbed her other hand, holding them both closely within your palms. “do you think if your dad was honest from the beginning things would’ve been different?”
“i-… well…”
“nevermind, sorry that was int-“ you dropped her hands and ran yours through your hair, the other covering your mouth in disbelief.
“no no, it’s okay.” she reached for your hands and they were intertwined once again. “i think things would’ve turned out the same. it probably would’ve just… took a longer time.”
“i guess… since your mom practically ignored your dad after he explained…”
“yup. i believe things happen for a reason.”
“really? i’m 50/50 on that.” you looked up at her with a questioning look.
“well, for one, it led me to you.” she gazed in your eyes, her hands soft and gently cradling yours side to side. you looked at her with amazement. since when was she making the moves with all the cheesy lines?
“okay… so i’m not 50/50… maybe 70/30.” “dork.” “your dork?” “…” “sayyy it…” “…” “you know you wanna…”
“my dork.”
“hehehe…” 
with a victorious grin on your face, you pinched her right cheek, something she both hated and loved. rolling her eyes, she positioned herself to lay her head on your crossed legs while your hands automatically fixed her hair to keep her face clear.
“god you’re so-“
“lovable? i know… it’s crazy.”  
“well…”
“oh, we were serious?”
“yes, seriously, y/n. there are times i think about that night by the river.”
“that night by the river…”
“when i told you i believed in love again, after my parents. because of you.” she opened her eyes and looked up at you like you were a constellation in the night sky. eyes wide and full of wonder.
“i know what you’re talking about, i didn’t forget, don’t worry.” you smiled, tucking a strand of hair that went astray behind her ear.
“when things get hard i think of that night, and how… i don’t know. you know that feeling when something means so much, and it’s so good, feels so right, almost too perfect, you’re just scared it’ll slip away?”
“mmhm. of course. that’s how i felt about this book i was reading. things were going so well at the beginning, like it wa-… continue though.”
“sometimes i’m scared we’ll slip away.”
“what?!”
“i mean like! it’s just a tiny… irrational fear in the back of my head.”
“ell… good thing that won’t happen!”
“how are you always so sure about things?”
i tell my secrets and you figure out why i’m guarded. you say,
“i get why you’re worried, okay? but we’ll never make your parents’ mistakes.”
she sat up straight to give you a proper hug, or, well, she more or less just threw herself on you. not that you were complaining, you loved her bear hugs.
“you and i… we talk things out. we work well that way, right?”
“yeah.”
“i love you. and thank you for letting me love you.”
“i love you too. so so much.”
and we got bills to pay. we got nothing figured out, when it was hard to take, this is what i thought about. 
throughout your relationship, you two came across a couple, or well, several bumps along the road. but it was always something you two had dealt with before. even if it wasn’t, you were beginning to feel comfortable sharing the weight you carried on your shoulders with minji; talking about the usual late night shifts, a terror professor, etc.
communication was one of the last things your relationship with minji lacked.
until one fateful evening, you received a phone call from your brother. one you wished you never had to hear. one no one ever deserved to hear. 
before he spoke, something about it already felt wrong. the combination of muffled sirens, crying from who you surely knew was from your sister, and conversation between who you assumed were adults, was straight eery. a shiver ran down your spine, realizing the nature of the news.
and you were right. 
you could feel your hand shake as he spoke with a stutter,
“noona… it’s about… about d-dad… h-he… he… did it to hims-himself… he-he w-went out… and to-told us not to follow. a-and, and then we- we heard… we heard a r-really… r-really loud noise… n-noona… wh-when… when are you coming b-back?”
what?
who?
how?
your father. he shot himself in your neighborhood’s park.
and you’ve yet to understand why. why he’d choose to abandon his family. why he suddenly switched from the hardworking man who’d endure hell for his family, to a man who chose to escape his troubles.
after consoling your brother and the rest of your family on the phone, you packed your bags and took a taxi the next day. heading straight back to your hometown, a much smaller and rural area compared to the skyscraping city of seoul. 
you ran straight to your parents’ room as soon as you arrived, your bags dropped and forgotten by the conjoined living room and kitchen. there was no time to reminisce the warmth, comfort, and love that came with the childhood home you haven’t seen in years. 
as soon as you stepped foot in your parents’ room, your younger sister, who was much taller than the last time you saw her, ran straight into your arms, almost knocking you over. it didn’t take long for your younger brother to follow, his added weight finally pushing you to fall butt first to the fortunately, carpeted floor.
you rubbed their backs as soothingly as you possibly could while they started dampening your shirt with tears. in a way, having them in your embrace comforted you the same way you comforted them. you shed your own fair share of tears, hugging them even tighter when they’d take deep breaths and wail.
you also needed to process whatever the hell just happened.
a few minutes later, once your siblings had calmed down, you slowly stood up from the floor and approached your mother who was sorting out papers on what used to be your parents’ shared bed. the mattress dipped as you sat beside her. you wrapped your arms around her frame, giving her a warm hug. 
her pain was silent, and you wished it wasn’t so you’d at least know she had an output, but at the same time, you both knew she held it together for your siblings’ sake. she gave your forehead a kiss and ruffled your hair, muttering a soft “you’ve been eating well.” 
she was just happy to see her baby home.
the next couple of days were dull and grey. it was the only word you could use to describe it. your mother would head out to deal with government papers, your siblings stayed at home with modular work as permitted by the school after what had happened, and you picked up a small full-time job at a bakery as a cashier.
in a private conversation with your mother, late at night when your siblings were fast asleep, she explained to you the law of debt and inheritance in simple terms. it was difficult, but most definitely much needed for you to at least grasp understanding on why your father did what he did. 
“i know what your first thoughts were going to be. and he wasn’t being a selfish person, y/n. he never was and he never will be. in this province specifically, debt isn’t passed down to your heirs. your father… he… he borrowed a lot of money, y/n. and we thought we could pay it back over the agreed 3 years. it was taking longer than expected, and they began looking for your dad with threats that… i’d rather not share with you.”
“wait what? what about the money i’ve been sending? did it help? did you use it?”
“of course we did, y/n. we don’t want your hard work going to waste. we used it for yoonseo and junseo’s tuition. there was an increase that wasn’t in our… scope.”
“fucking school…”
“hey… listen. do you understand things a little better now?”
“…yes.”
“repeat to me what you understand.”
“dad… didn’t want them coming after me… us.”
“yes.”
“i… i don’t understand how you’re so… calm about it right now, ma. did you know? did he tell you he would?”
“he didn’t. we fought about it, actually. i couldn’t believe all that… nonsense he was saying.”
“oh… i’m sorry. i’m sorry i thought he-“
“it’s okay, y/n. and i know you. i know you, yoonseo, and junseo. it’s okay to not be okay right now. i want you to feel that. let it out. cry, scream, take a walk, do anything. let the pain pass through. i’ll be here to make sure you’ll be alright.”
“but we want to be here for you too ma…”
“you will be there for me when you feel better. but right now, you’re my children, and i’m your mom. i want to make sure you’re okay first.”
and for the rest of the night, you silently wept against your mother’s shoulder as she held you tight against her chest, the same way she did the day you were born. you were always your mother's child at the end of the day.
since the day you left til that night, your focus was on yourself and your family. comforting your siblings when your mom couldn’t, helping around the house, and searching for more jobs dirt-paying jobs you could take, for you didn’t care as long as it’d help fill the gap your father left.
your focus was solely on the grief held over yourself and your family, that somehow, you had completely forgotten about your life in the city.
the life with kim minji in it.
on her side of the world, minji was struggling. newjeans was still a popular and well-received group with global success, but their growth was exceeding expectations, and that meant that the hate wave had only gotten stronger.
as their leader, minji was the supporting pillar, the foundation of sanity for the rest of the girls. when one of them had the need to cry or rant, they’d go to her, and she’d hold that responsibility willingly out of love and care for them.
but newjeans’ leader minji, is human. 
newjeans’ leader minji, is kim minji. 
a 20-year-old girl facing the world’s backlash and carrying the weight of her members’ hurt alongside her own on her back.
she wasn’t meant to deal with all of that alone.
where was kim minji’s supporting pillar? where was her foundation of sanity? 
where were you?
where were you when she needed you the most?
and i remember that fight, 2:30 am, ‘cause everything was slipping right out of our hands. i ran out, crying, and you followed me out into the street. 
things have calmed down a bit. you and your family decided it was best for you to go back to the city as it was where you’d earn the most for your work. you hated saying goodbye to them, especially at a time where it was best where you were all together. but you and your family didn’t have the luxury of choice. you and your family couldn’t afford to lose the opportunity.
on the 2-hour long taxi ride home, you finally decided to charge your phone. you hadn’t realized how you completely deserted it the moment you arrived at your childhood home. leaving it on the car seat, you decided to take a nap to get rid of the headache that was building up. whether it was from the anxiety of being away from your family after what happened, or the pressure of having your family’s financial support come mostly from you, you needed an escape, even if it was just for 2 hours.
you weren’t sure how or what you felt. you knew most would be sad. grief-struck and lost. and you did feel that in a way, when your family held a small ceremony at the memorial center because it was all you could afford. it was just you, your mom, your siblings, and a few neighbors who knew your parents.
that was the hardest you ever let yourself mourn, the loudest you ever let yourself cry, and after that, you felt empty. your chest and your stomach ached, but there was nothing else to feel. your head, on the other hand, felt heavy. like it was rammed against a cement wall and forced to carry the weight of hardbound books. 
the moment you picked yourself up from your wallowing in sorrow, the weight of responsibility crashed into you all at once. like being thrown anvils to carry on your back, every step you took wherever you went. your father wasn’t just one of your family’s sources of income, he also stood as a figure of support for your siblings and your mom while you were away. you were angry at him for leaving you, but you beat yourself around into understanding that it wasn’t an escape.
it was about 2am by the time you arrived at the small apartment complex. an inconvenient decision that may have seemed senseless, but before you insisted in spending as much time as you could with your family before you were required to report to work the next day.
and so here you were, backpack in hand, unlocking the door to your apartment late at night.
seeing the living room and kitchen lights on alarmed you. you were sure you turned everything off before you left. your electricity bills were going to be horrendous that month.
you settle your bag down on the floor and bent over to untie your shoes.
“oh… you decided to come back?”
that voice.
kim minji.
hearing her voice again felt fresh. but it felt fresh for only one reason.
you ignored her the whole time you were away. you didn’t tell anyone anything, not even you friends in the city.
minji’s tone was firm. it wasn’t sharp and cold like the time she came over to confront you about missing your dates.
it was firm, but it was also vulnerable. the night she confronted you her voice lacked all the emotion in the world. tonight, it was full of it. you couldn’t tell if she was worried, angry, disappointed, sad, maybe everything and in between.
“where were you?”
there it was. the burning question of the night. 
unlike last time, minji didn’t bother approaching you. she stayed seated on the living room couch, her head turned to face you at the front door.
“minji, listen. i-“ you walked towards her, approaching the living room couch with caution from what you could pick up in her voice.
“y/n i was in pain… did you know that? the past few weeks have been horrible… and before i can even begin to talk about why, i have to worry about whether you were even alive or not!”
“i’m sorry! okay, i’m sorry!”
you were defensive, and it came out like you were throwing around apologies for a band-aid solution, when that really wasn’t the case. you just didn’t have it in your heart to tell her what happened.
“we had to cancel 2 fansigns because of threats we were getting, did you even know that, y/n?”
no, you didn’t. you weren’t aware of how far your girlfriend’s career had gone for the group to be receiving that kind of treatment. even before your dad passed.
“…no.”
“and that’s just… the tip of the fucking iceberg… so i ran here thinking i’d find you. because, y/n, i know for a fact you’re my safe place. but you weren’t even fucking there…”
“i’m sorry…” you muttered, your hands clasped together as you stood in front of her.
“you weren’t answering calls, you weren’t responding to texts. from me or any of the girls! i asked my manager to get in contact with your coworkers! fuck, i even asked some of our high school friends… but none of them knew where you were! do you know how sick my stomach felt?” she looked up at you with tears in her eyes. one of the few times you’ve ever seen her cry, and somehow, it always had something to do with you.
it made you feel sick.
“i’m so sorry…”
“and before you fucking arrived, for a moment i really thought you were going to just leave everything like my dad.”
after all the pain she’s shared with you?
“minji i-“
“but a part of me knew, or wanted to know you’d never do that. like you said, ‘we’d never make my parents’ mistakes’. but in that moment it felt like you did. like we did.”
“i’m sorry… i wasn’t thinking…”
“i think we need a fucking break y/n.”
she stood up.
what?
“w-what? minji what do you mean w-why a-“
“this isn’t the first time you just disappeared on me, don’t you get it? the first time it happened i had to confront you because otherwise you’d just let it slide and it’d probably happen again within the next few months.”
she walked to the dining room, away from the living room. it was closer to the apartment entrance.
“that’s not true.”
“when i told you about my parents, it was because i thought i had finally found something different with you.”
“and we did! we are! we’re not like them…”
she stood by the door, hand on the knob.
“you keep disappearing on me, y/n. i don’t know what to believe anymore.”
and just like that, she dropped the spare keys to your apartment on your kitchen counter, and left your apartment unit. 
you knew better than to let her go. you knew better to let the love of your life go. you knew better than to let her, a celebrity, run out in the middle of the night, with no security, and god knows who or what out in the streets of the area you stayed in.
braced myself for the goodbye, ‘cause that’s all i’ve ever known. 
for minji, she had no idea what she was doing, but she knew couldn’t take another second in your damned apartment. the apartment she stayed in the weeks she was waiting for you to come back. it reminded her of the times she felt like her mom, desperately waiting for her dad to come back to her. it reminded her of how she felt like her dad during the first month of the divorce, and how he kept his hopes high telling her and her brother that things would get better because their mom would always come back, when she didn’t. she hated that apartment because it reminded her of why she hated love. why she stopped believing in love.
she hated that apartment because it was yours, and you showed her how to believe in love again, and you made her believe you two would be different. 
if that was so, then why did you leave her feeling like things were going to end the same way her parents did?
she couldn’t take it anymore. how could she fully commit to someone who’d leave her out of the loop. someone who can’t at least try to share part of their world with her. someone who, after seeing all the sides and versions of her, could still get up and leave without a word.
you cursed under your breath for minji being so long-legged. it didn’t take long for her to get to your apartment building’s lobby, but timing was by your side. for once, it felt like maybe the world wasn’t against you.
the scene was cinematic. you grabbed her wrist from behind her, and pulled her by the arm, back towards you. back to you where you knew she belonged.
“i’m sorry, and i promise i’ll tell you everything. and i know i left with no warning, no sign. i know that it was best to tell you. but i promise i wouldn’t have done it if it wasn’t something as serious as that.”
you gently reached over to hold her other hand in yours. hopefully it was enough to not have her run away again.
“i don’t know how many sorry’s i have left in me, but whatever that amount is, i know, won’t be enough. but please, minji, i’m begging you now, please don’t leave. i know it’s been hard, it’s been difficult for me too. fuck, it’s been hell the past few weeks and not a single second of it has felt real, but i need you. i need you to stay.”
you took a deep inhale. you hadn’t realized you weren’t breathing throughout your mini speech. 
“because right now it feels like i’ve lost everything, and i can’t take it if i lost you. and i know… i know, i sound like a guilt-tripping asshole right now but that’s really... you mean a lot. you mean so much… you mean so fucking much to me, minji, and i know that’s not what you felt when i disappeared, but it’s the truth, and i-“
your legs gave in. you were exhausted, but you weren’t going to stop until you knew she’d stay.
you knelt on the floor, in front of her, holding her hands above your head.
god, you looked so ridiculously desperate. but you didn’t care. not an inch of your body felt a bit of shame. you knew minji was worth everything you had.
“i love you. i love you. i love you so much. and i don’t know how else to say this without sounding like a fucking asshole, but i know you love me too, and i just need you to hear me out, before you decide to leave. and if you still want to go after, then i-. i wouldn’t blame you, and i’d let you, but please… please.” you whispered out the last of your words, your sobs echoing through the empty, dim-lit lobby.
she’d never seen you like this before. 
not once in the several years of being your friend or your girlfriend.
and you were right, she loved you so much. just as much as you did her.
and that was enough for her to listen.
“get up.” she spoke so softly, you could’ve missed it if you weren’t listening for any response.
you scrambled, shuffled onto your feet, and finally came face-to-face with the girl you loved.
it took everything in you to not hold her, kiss her, and comfort her, when you knew you were the cause of her pain and suffering.
but if god made angels roam earth, you were convinced minji was one of them.
she almost catapulted towards you, causing you to stumble backwards until your back met a wall. your arms automatically wrapped around her waist, like it was second nature, or maybe because it was.
you heard her sobs, and you ran your fingers through her hair like she’d do for you. rub her back comfortingly like when you held your siblings in your arms, her tears dampening your clothes the same way theirs did.
you let her be, and waited patiently until she decided to speak. her face rested against your shoulder so her voice was slightly muffled, 
“i thought you’d leave.”
you felt your chest tighten in guilt.
“i thought i did something wrong, or that you were tired of me. tired of dating someone with a job like mine, packed up, and left.”
then, you took me by surprise. you said,
“i’m sorry i made you feel that way.”
you kissed the top of her head and rested your cheek against it.
“never again. i promise, and i say it out loud this time.  i’ll never leave you alone.”
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wqnwoos · 8 months
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seventeen — vocal unit as your boyfriend
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okay so technically i already did this in dating hyung line / maknae line but — part 2 i guess? requested by @glowunderthemoon 💗
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jeonghan
evil!!!!! likes to play around with you so much
especially if you guys are playing games or something he just makes up rules that get wilder and wilder until you draw the line
apologises to you afterwards w backhugs and kisses on your neck but he’s still giggling so how sorry is he really?
sends you all his boyfriend photos and then when he finds out one of them is your lockcreen he’s sooooo cocky about it (“i didn’t know you liked me that much” “jeonghan we have been dating for two years”)
takes you shopping but then gets antsy if you guys stay too long in one shop 😭 he won’t hurry you but he’ll just be shifting around awkwardly until ur done
has unflattering pictures of you as his lock screen. think fast asleep mouth open drooling a little. that’s his lockscreen and he won’t change it no matter how much u ask (he actually thinks it’s adorable)
gives you bites of his food without you even asking
joshua
takes loads of random selfies on your phone,,, like you open the photos app and ur like ?????? because suddenly there are 78 new photos of his face that you definitely did not take
gets sulky if you leave him to go out with friends or something 😭 ofc he’s just kidding but he dramatically throws an arm over his face and pouts (“i thought you loved me!!!!” “joshua you don’t even like this restaurant” “what if i changed my mind????” “we tried it last week!!!!”)
i feel like he’s the worst to have by ur side in an awkward situation bc you guys look at each other and you’re suddenly trying to hold back your laughter SOOOO bad and there’s not even anything funny😭
or if you’re talking to someone annoying he just stands behind them and makes faces to try and get you to crack tf up
tries to learn your favourite song on the guitar and then when you’re like “show me :))” he just starts playing sunday morning
woozi
omfg. the SWEETEST.
i think i said this in the other one but lets you play with his equipment and teaches you how to make basic beats and stuff (if u don’t know already) — tells u things like “good job!!” when you finish one
he’ll let you do whatever you want for dates and go along with it because you want to do it even if he’s reluctant <3333
if you don’t watch anime congratulations now you do!!!!! catch him at the right moment he’s gonna give you the rundown on all his favourites and the plots and the characters and everything (like his six hour live omfg)
genuinely believe he really is not cold as a boyfriend i think that is a Misconception — i saw this post the other day and HARD AGREE like this is mr i love my team i love my crew we are talking about ??? the same man who wrote darling which is arguably one of their sweetest songs????????
dk
i’m convinced this man is an angel ? he acts like your guardian angel anyway he takes care of you so hard it’s crazy
he makes sure u eat well and u rest well and everything omg :(
also feel like he randomly bursts into a skit in the kitchen and you hAVE to play along you have to get invested!!!!!
also just a sidenote can u imagine just being in the same house as him and you can just hear him singing from the other room :( i am so sad :(
i feel like he takes note of what you really like and remembers (or notes it down). like if you have flowers in a vase the first time h comes over you best believe he’s going to keep that vase STOCKED for however long
even if he’s away or on tour or something you’d still get weekly deliveries with a card or something AHHHHHH
compliment battles 😭 even if you just say something small (“i like your hair today”) he immediately returns the compliment x10 until eventually you guys are just arguing about who’s sweeter or something weird which just ends in giggles once you realise how loud he’s saying “oh yeah? well your eyes are even prettier!!!”
seungkwan
MY LOVELY SEUNGKWAN 😭💗😭💗 convinced he’s sooo boyfriend material
like the most caring kindest sweetest boyfriend he texts you reminders every day (“don’t forget to eat~” “drink some water please~”) HES SO CUTE 😭
randomly squishes your cheeks and goes “pretty” and then moves on like nothing happened but gets so flustered if you do it back 😭 acts annoyed but he kinda loves it <3
if you’re cooking with music on you’re not getting him out that kitchen he is dancing like there’s no tomorrow !!!!! makes you join him and teaches you the steps if you don’t know them already until both of you are just giggling messes and oh fuck the food’s going to burn
wants your approval for every outfit and hairstyle 😭 the stylist is about to dye his hair and he holds up a hand like. “WAIT.” and facetimes you quickly like “hi baby what do you think about dark blue hair???”
and if you tell him something like “seungkwan you’re always handsome” he just clicks his tongue and rolls his eyes 😭😭 “just tell me yes or no!!!”
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slut4msby · 2 months
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one of 'those'. sakusa kiyoomi x reader (part one.)
+ tags & warnings; n/a
+ a/n; day 3/7!! should i write a p2 of sakusa as a dad bc i have such an unbelievable soft spot for this man it isnt even funny
+ part two.
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Sakusa was never a fan of kids. Being the youngest child in the family he never had any younger siblings or cousins to learn from only the troublesome kids he encountered in public. The kids who would sit near him on a plane as the athlete flew across the country for his next game and wouldn’t stop crying the whole flight causing him to not get any sleep. Or the kids who would run rouge in the malls he would often avoid like the plague. Children made unnecessary messes as well, often throwing up and contracting constant illnesses from preschool. Kids are like animals, they can smell fear. Sakusa would never admit he was nervous around children but every child who ever came in a close proximity would instantly start screaming due to the aura Kiyoomi exerted. 
Kiyoomi never really asked you how you felt about having kids, assuming it wasn’t all that important to you considering you never brought it up. He was wrong, you wanted nothing more than to start your own family with Sakusa and settle down. 
Sakusa never believed you enjoyed the presence of children until you had gone to one of their practices and spent your time hanging out with Bokuto’s 3 year old son, Kaito. Bokuto had found no one to watch his son this morning and opted to bring him to practices for the first time, luckily for the team you were more than happy to keep Kaito company whilst the team practised. Kaito, similarly to his father, needed constant attention. The whole practice Kaito couldn’t stop smiling and laughing as the two of you ran around. You helped Kaito practise his volleyball as he wouldn’t stop talking about how he is going to ‘be just like dada one day.” The constant laughter from Kaito kept catching Kiyoomi’s attention.
“Yo Omi-Omi you good?” Atsumu asked, handing Kiyoomi a water bottle. “Oh? You watching Y/N-chan and Kaito? Why don’t ya just have one of yer own, Omi-Omi?”
“I never thought Sakusa would be the type who likes kids.” Meian added on.
“I don’t like them.” Kiyoomi said, taking a drink from his water bottle. You were currently bent down talking to Kaito. You and Kaito turned your heads around to look at your husband and his team giving them a big smile and a wave. 
“Well Kaito sure seems to be getting your attention today, not even Y/N distracts you this much Omi!” Hinata jokes.
Bokuto soon ran over like a proud dad picking up his son throwing him in the air, causing the biggest smile and giggle out of Kaito. “Dada!” Kaito smiled.
Sakusa slowly walked over to you standing by your side watching Bokuto and his son. He slowly wrapped his hand around your waist softly whispering into your ear, “maybe we should have one of those.” He said pointing towards Kaito who was now playing with Bokuto and Hinata.
You couldn’t help but turn to Sakusa with stars in your eyes, “really, Kiyoomi?!” To which Sakusa nodded in response, you knew about his hatred to kids and his constant urge to scoff at those crying in public but hearing those words come out of Kiyoomi’s felt like the world was complete. You couldn’t help but bring Kiyoomi into an excited kiss despite his constant protests to not kiss in front of his team. But just this once he could ignore their teasing he thinks before kissing you back.
©slut4msby.
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steddieas-shegoes · 11 months
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For the requests: Steve has a good relationship with his parents & when they come back from wherever & someone (Nancy/Robin) tells them about the UD & his parents react by calling out every single adult involved. Maybe he got badly hurt, & they were called in & upon finding out they call out Joyce, Hop, Owens & Murray for the way no adult inthese kids lives had any clue about what their kids were going through. Nor were their parents given notice esp bc having underaged kids sign NDAs is not legal nor legally binfing (Maybe all the parents of the party kids are there and get all the info just like the Harrington's)
MY DARLING! LIGHT OF MY LIFE! HONESTLY this one hit different. You know how much I love making Steve suffer and when he has good parents, a lot of his suffering disappears. But it was nice to branch out a bit. Also finally some common sense! KIDS SHOULD NEVER BE SIGNING AN NDA THEMS THE FACTS! Steve's parents are here to fight for everyone so WELCOME TO THE CHAOS OF STEVE'S OVERPROTECTIVE LAWYER PARENTS! - Mickala ❤️
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Steve Harrington had managed to avoid the hospital for years. Not because he shouldn’t have gone, but because he refused to go.
But this time, he was unconscious, which means he didn’t have a choice.
And now, staring at his parents’ shocked and appalled faces next to his bed, he realized he wished he’d just died, actually.
“This happens…often?” Anne Harrington asked Dr. Owens, who looked like he wished he was also dead.
“It does happen more often than we like. But it appears to be fixed now! Steven has been a wonderful asset to us, which is why we want to make sure he is comfortable and all his medical expenses are paid.”
He handled that well, Steve thought.
“And this is the first time anyone has bothered to call us?” Richard Harrington asked much too quietly.
That was his ‘I’m about to lose my shit’ voice and Steve didn’t have the energy to deal with it.
“I do apologize, we had to deal with enough NDAs as it is,” Dr. Owens replied, not realizing that he was speaking to two lawyers who were about to ruin his life.
Steve let his head rest against the pillow of the hospital bed, sighing.
“At what age did Steve sign his first NDA?”
“I believe he was 16.”
“And did he have a lawyer present?” Anne didn’t wait for a response before continuing. “I can tell you he didn’t. We’re his lawyers and we were not even called. Are you the one in charge of this shitshow?”
It wasn’t often Anne Harrington said a curse word. Steve only ever heard it a handful of times, usually after hanging up with a client who would lose their case.
“I am one of the people who is tasked with this, yes. But if you don’t mind, I need to check in with a few people before I can truly devote time to this conversation.”
“Oh, please. Continue on with your day. Don’t mind us sitting next to our son in the hospital.”
Dr. Owens sighed, knowing this fight was barely even starting, and left the room.
Steve’s parents turned to him.
“How many concussions have you had?”
“Why didn’t you call us?”
“Who else knows about this?”
“Will this happen again?”
The questions were too much, and Steve’s head was pounding. He couldn’t do this right now.
“Hopper.”
“Jim Hopper? I thought he died.”
Admittedly, his parents had been out of town for a while. They didn’t know Hopper was back as of a few months ago, and probably didn’t realize he’d taken over as chief again.
“He didn’t. He’s around here somewhere.”
“He knew about all this?”
“Mom, I love you, but my head is splitting down the middle. I need to stop talking.”
Anne slowly brushed her hand through his hair, planting a kiss on his forehead.
“Of course, honey. We’ll be back soon. Do not sign anything without us here, okay?”
“Okay.”
His dad briefly touched his shoulder before they both left the room.
Finally, some peace and quiet.
Until he was woken up by yelling.
Not just any yelling. Richard Harrington yelling.
If he wasn’t chained to the bed by an IV and blood transfusion bag, he would be up and in the hallway.
Apparently, he didn’t need to worry, though.
His mom came into the room, leaving the door open to the hallway so he could hear everything.
“I’m glad you’re awake, honey. We have a lot to talk about.”
“Who is he yelling at?”
“Every adult who didn’t bother to take care of you the way they should. Not just you, but all of these kids,” she said, tone more annoyed by the second.
“I don’t understand.”
“Honey, you’ve been protecting these kids in ways you never should have had to. All these adults who were involved never told any of us what was going on. They let you keep standing in the line of fire, getting hurt, seeing things you shouldn’t have to and never even bothered to call us. You signed NDAs with the government without parents or lawyers present. That alone is illegal, do you understand that?”
“So I’m in trouble?”
“Oh, honey, no. You’re not in trouble. Your dad’s having a few words with the chief and Dr. Owens.”
Steve tuned in to what was being said in the hall.
“I cannot fathom what you’ve done. Expecting these children to save this town, the world, and not even have their own parents know? Who are they supposed to turn to? You? And what have you done to help them? As far as I’m concerned, you should be arrested and imprisoned. If I have anything to say about it, you will!”
“Mom, can you please get him to stop? I know he’s upset, but Hop really protected us a lot, okay? And Dr. Owens was just doing his job.”
“A lot of people have just been doing their jobs instead of considering that maybe children shouldn’t be responsible for defeating actual monsters.”
Well. Yeah, she did have a point there.
“Where is everyone?”
Anne sat on the edge of his bed, holding his hand, running her thumb along the back of it.
“The Munson boy is in the room next door, he’ll be okay. Robin is home with her parents. Most of the kids are now with their parents, but that Sinclair boy is still being watched for concussion symptoms.”
Steve sighed with relief.
No one was lost. Everyone had pretty minor injuries. Maybe he was able to protect everyone.
“That Dustin boy is relentless,” Anne said with a smile. “He really looks up to you.”
“Yeah, he’s like a brother to me.”
“His mom didn’t know about any of this either, did she?”
Steve thought about it.
Honestly, she probably had some idea. Maybe not of the real details, but she had to know Dustin was involved in something he couldn’t talk about. Same with most of the parents.
But Steve’s parents were gone a lot. Their main office was in Boston, and they would often have to travel around the country for their clients. He was used to not seeing them, only getting to talk to them on the phone once or twice a week.
It’s easy to hide shit over the phone, and when they did manage to make it home, the Upside Down monsters were safely tucked away underground.
They had no way of knowing anything was wrong. He did it on purpose, just like all of the kids did.
Even without signing the NDAs, he’s pretty sure they wouldn’t have told their parents.
“I think we just thought we were protecting you guys.”
“Honey, it’s not your job to protect us. It’s our job to protect you.”
She looked so sad.
Steve didn’t want her to be sad.
“Mom, you couldn’t have done anything. And we’re all safe.”
His dad walked in the room, face red. He closed the door behind him and ran his hand over his face.
“Doctor said Steve can go when the nurse comes to disconnect him from everything soon,” he said, coming to sit in the chair by his bed.
“That’s good news. We’ll get you home and settled. We canceled our flight out so we can stick around for a while and make sure you’re okay,” Anne said with a smile.
“You guys don’t have to cancel your trip. Your clients need you.”
“Not as much as you need us, son,” Richard said, giving him a soft smile.
“I’ve handled it before, though.”
“And you shouldn’t have. Trust me, this town, the government, they’ve got a shit storm coming and I’m leading it,” his dad huffed.
A knock interrupted Steve’s response, the door opening slightly before they answered.
Eddie.
“Steve? You okay?”
Steve’s parents looked at the door, then back at Steve, who was doing his best to hide the fond smile on his face.
It wasn’t working though, not when he saw the way Eddie was trying to take inventory of his injuries from across the room.
“You can come in, Eds.”
“Who’s this, honey?” Anne asked.
“This is Eddie.”
“Oh! You poor thing. I heard all about what you’ve been through. Let me just say, if we had caught wind of it earlier and knew you were Steve’s friend, we would’ve been representing you in court,” Anne rushed to say, her hands fluttering over Eddie’s when he got next to the bed.
Eddie’s wide eyes would have been amusing if Steve didn’t worry that he might run for the hills at the care his parents showed.
“Uh. Thank you?”
“Do you need anything right now? Do your parents need anything?” Richard asked, sitting forward in his chair, business face on.
“Um, just me and my uncle, but no. I’m heading home, but wanted to check on Steve before I go.”
“Of course! You guys are close friends?”
It was an innocent question. His parents just liked to know who was in his life, that’s all. But Eddie looked at him with panic written all over his face.
Steve gave him a small smile, then turned to his parents.
“Actually, he’s my boyfriend.”
They were quiet for a moment, which Steve expected. No matter how well he thought they’d take it, he knew it would be a shock.
But his parents didn’t let him down.
“How long have you been together, Steve?”
“Since March. Four months?” He watched as Eddie started to back away, probably expecting the worst.
Anne smacked Steve’s arm, forgetting for a moment that he was in the hospital for a reason.
“Sorry,” she said before crossing her arms. “You’ve had a boyfriend for four months and didn’t tell us? We could have come back and arranged dinner to meet him. I’m so sorry our son is rude, Eddie. He wasn’t raised that way, I assure you.”
Eddie’s jaw dropped.
“Um. What’s happening right now?”
“We’ll be home for a while to make sure Steve is alright. We’d love to have you over for dinner soon. With your uncle if you’d like,” Richard added as Eddie just stared between them.
“What do you like? I just got a new cookbook that has so many European dishes I want to try. Are you a fan of Polish food? You know what, no, what about Greek? We haven’t had good Greek food in so long.”
Steve was laughing, he couldn’t help it.
“Steve, what the hell is going on here?”
“Eddie, that’s my mom, Anne, and my dad, Richard. They’re kind of the best, and apparently they want you and Wayne to come for dinner. Think you can find time in your schedule?”
“Uh.”
“Oh dear. Do you have a concussion? They should monitor you kids better,” Anne worried, moving her hands up to cup his cheeks and look in his eyes. “Should I get a nurse?”
“No, mom, he’s okay. He just expected you two to freak out.”
“About what?”
“The fact he’s a man.”
“Oh! I do suppose that’s a reasonable concern.”
“Eddie, let me ask you this: do you make Steve happy?” Richard asked.
“I think so.”
“And he makes you happy?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Then it sounds like we have no reason to be upset. Now, dinner? Maybe tomorrow night?”
“Okay.”
Steve laughed loudly.
“Eds, come here,” Steve gestured for him to come closer.
Eddie moved next to the bed, his arm bandaged, and a new cut with stitches in it on his forehead.
“Closer.”
Eddie leaned in.
Steve leaned up and kissed his lips. Just a quick peck, just enough to get the point across that this was really okay and really happening.
“Tomorrow at 6?” Steve asked before he pulled away completely.
Eddie nodded.
“And please bring your uncle, we need to discuss our plan for a lawsuit on behalf of all of you,” Richard spoke up from his chair.
“Oh. Yes, sir.” Eddie pulled away from the bed, nervously playing with his rings.
“Richard is fine, son.”
Eddie was blushing, which Steve was absolutely going to make fun of him for later.
“See you tomorrow, then?” Eddie asked awkwardly.
“Love you, Eds.”
“Oh. Uh. Yep. Love you too, Stevie.”
He raced out of the room, leaving Steve and Anne laughing quietly.
“Poor boy. Didn’t know what to do, did he?”
“No, I think he isn’t used to a positive reaction when people find out about him.”
“His uncle knows about you two, though, right?”
“Yeah, Wayne’s been great.”
“Good. Well, I’m going to find a nurse so we can go home. You should be comfortable in your own bed.”
“And I am going to make a quick call to my buddy in Chicago to see if he can pull some information on this Owens guy. We have a lot of work to do.”
Steve was used to this. For some kids, maybe this wasn’t good parenting. Maybe his parents being gone for a lot of his life had a negative impact.
But Steve never doubted how much they loved him. They still came home for every birthday, every Christmas. They still managed to take a family vacation every year. They gave him everything he needed and most of what he wanted. They supported him through everything, the proof right here in front of him now.
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