#bc we all know guillermos a vampire now

[cinders-gh0st]

someone pointed out nandors last wish and the idea of him wantonly using it to turn guillermo back into a human and I CAN'T EVEN!!!

[wheel-of-misfortune]

you wanna know something i can't stop thinking about regarding the wwdits s5 finale???? how fucking SMART nandor was. about everything.

the narrative always painted him as not the brightest, specially when compared to the rest of the main cast. but when he couldn't find guillermo, going to his mom bc he knew that was the one way to make guillermo come out of hiding???? absolute genius move coming from the man who didn't even know there were multiple panera breads. (just how nandor even knows about guillermo's family and where they live is a whole other conversation on its own)

after only being caught up on the situation for a day, he immediately knew why guillermo's body was fighting the vampirism and how to fix it (which NOBODY could figure out for 10 episodes). and when he saw that being a vampire wasn't working for him, in an instant he came up with two different solutions for that (asking the djinn and killing derek). after a whole month of the whole cast failing to help guillermo, in just 24 hours nandor knew exactly how to make it all better.

JUST THE KNOWLEDGE OF WHY NANDOR NEVER TURNED GUILLERMO CHANGES EVERYTHING!!! for several seasons now we theorized why nandor was so dodgy about this subject. but it wasn't bc he didn't care, or to keep the status quo, or bc he was afraid guillermo would leave once he got what he wanted. IT WAS BC HE KNEW GUILLERMO WELL ENOUGH TO UNDERSTAND HE WASN'T READY FOR EVERYTHING BEING A VAMPIRE ENTAILS!!!

this finale showed that even though nandor can usually be dense and a bit slow, he can also think really quickly once all the avaliable information is presented to him. and he's actually aware of the people around him and their feelings (specially guillermo's). even though he acts aloof all the time, nandor can be serious and collected when the situation calls for it.

the s5 finale legit completely changed how i view his character.

[beansprean]

My Familiar's Ghost, continued!! Part 2, technically, but not everything will be linear bc this is a loosey goosey AU. Peep the OG.

me writing Nadja’s dialogue: “I didn’t expect you back until-“ no, no…. “I didn’t expect you HOME…” 🥺 idk why but I got real soft for her making that change fjdjdjdjsk she expected him HOMEEEEE

Masterpost

(ID in alt and under cut)

ID: 1a. Ghost Guillermo, floating on a brown square background with a spectral blue tail instead of legs and glowing blue, gestures angrily as he rants, "You have no idea what it's been like, fading in and out, no sense of time - I don't even know how long I've been dead, a day? A year?? None of you could see or hear me and it was like my first year of being a familiar all over again! Especially because apparently I imprinted so hard on all the cleaning supplies so they were the only thing I could touch! 1b. Close up on Nadja, grimacing uncomfortably and looking off to the side as if searching for an escape from this conversation. Guillermo continues from offscreen, "And of course, of course this happens! I finally get turned into a vampire and I end up as a ghost while other me gets to live it up Armand style! It's so effing unfair!" 1c. Guillermo pauses in his ghostly pacing to look back over his shoulder at Nadja, anger still clear on his face as he asks, "Where is he, by the way? Or, me, I guess. If I were me, I would avoid me, too."

2a. Reverse shot of Nadja facing the viewer, Guillermo floating in front of her with his back facing the viewer. Nadja leans her upper body over as if checking him out, one hand on her hip and the other pointing at his whole thing. She replies, "How should I know where Mr. Big Dick New Vampire went to? Now how are you touching things without gooping them all up? And why can I see you now when I couldn't before?" Guillermo just responds "What?" 2b. Close up on Guillermo, his face creased in concern. Ignoring Nadja's questions, he says, "I-I didn't come back? I mean, not even to gloat? I meant to, I- I remember the plan, I wasn't going to... You haven't even seen me since?" 2c. Zoom out to full body, same angle as 2a. Nadja just shrugs, unconcerned, replying "We assume you are out getting your little virgin fangs wet. I didn't expect you home for another decade, at least." Back to the viewer, Guillermo buries his face in his spectral hands and heaves out a frustrated sigh.

3a. Reverse shot, Guillermo now facing the viewer and Nadja in profile. Guillermo lifts his head with a serious expression and chops both hands decisively in the air, declaring, "Okay, you are not the one to be having this conversation with." Nadja rolls her eyes, one hand still palm up in a shrugging position and says "Thank you," with emphasis on thank. 3b. Guillermo flies through a wall to the left, only his tail still visible as he phases through with a 'voop!', saying "I'm gonna go find Nandor." Nadja leans after him, calling out, "You- wait, can he even see you?" /end ID

[inmyhorrorsera]

S5E8 "The Roast" thoughts:

Ok, I watched this episode three times and I'm still smiling. I love when you think and episode is gonna be about something because of its title and then surprise you when its all a misdirection (see also: Succession's "Connor's Wedding").

At first Laszlo's err… state intrigued me, love everyone projecting and imposing their own insecurities (Guillermo's secret, Nadja's hex) as a reason on why he is behaving like that. And of course it's a stupid reason 😭.

"And a flat pepsi for Guillermo". Oh Nandor, that's the worst thing you ever done to Guillermo, that's the worst thing you could do to anyone. And yes, I remember a certain S4 episode.

I screeched like a bird when Colin mentioned dreaming about being a baby under Laszlo's care, not only because I wanted this shit to happen since the past finale, but also I really thought the episode was going on that direction (and also bc its another W for my predictions).

Having said that, LOVED the nonchalance of Nadja and the others when they were like 'no, it wasn't a dream, that totally happened'.

I mentioned it in a separate post: they really had a Sweet Dee in IASIP moment when The Guide gave the roast idea, only to be ignored and then the same idea being stolen by a dude who is celebrated.

Seanie's poor brain it should be soup at this point, we don't know if he can hazily remember the event like it happened before.

What can I remember is his line after Nadja's roast because it was one of the biggest laughs for me: "Women CAN be funny!" I fucking loved it so much, it's the perfect condescending shit straight men say all the time, even when they're trying to be complementary to you they can't stop being garbage. It was a simple line but Anthony nailed the delivery and timing. Seriously, rewatch that part.

At first I was confused why all the jokes were so mid, but shortly I realized this episode wasn't about the roast at all, lol.

Just by watching screenshots of other users I noticed that in the scene of Nandor resting his head on Guillermo's shoulder there's a BIG flame between them. LMAO. There's no way that is unintentional.

Good for The Guide being the catalyst of Baron Afanas learning the truth. I was demanding more screen time for her lately, so having some incidence in the main plot goes on the plus column.

The other guests present at the roast being shocked at the knowledge of Guillermo killing vampires surprised me; I always assumed Guillermo being a familiar/slayer was a known fact in the vampire community after his very public massacre at the Théâtre des Vampires.

Fuck yeah when I realized this is a Doug Jones spotlight episode, I just fuckin ahgdjkaksdf, love him, perfect, no notes.

The Baron being terrifying!! Guillermo was seriously scared for the others and he barely tried to show off his Van Helsing abilities.

Nandor and Nadja begging the Baron to not hurt Guillermo!! 😭 Them being dragged while grabbing the cape!! 😭 They're spiritual siblings to me!! 😭😭

They really reminded me a little bro and sis begging their mom to not hit their beloved older brother with the chancla for talking back or something.

I fell for the two fake-outs with the sack lol I'm so gullible when it comes to vampires I guess.

NANDOR PAINFUL SOUNDS (MOANS???) WHEN HE BELIEVED HE WAS IN FRONT OF GUILLERMO'S INERT BODY. IT WAS SAD BUT ALSO A LITTLE HORNY!!!

"At least he died doing what he loved: beating off in the toolshed."

A wonderful small detail: After Laszlo opened fake Guillermo with the knife he cleaned his hands on The Guide's dress.

Idc if you think its dark, the whole 'Nandor will kill you and then kill himself' bit becoming a recurring joke it's peak writing.

I wish I can say something more serious about Baron Afanas' sadness over how boring his life is now. But I just keep thinking that the way he talks about his homelife with The Sire and the Hellhound sounds exactly when a dude has a middle life crisis and suddenly he doesn't enjoy his marriage anymore. They're husbands!! And I loved how cunty he looked at the end all half-charred (see posted gif) Queen!

Now, the Nandermo of it all: What more can I say than incoherent screaming and foaming from the mouth? Episodes 8 are all about them again!! Nandor on the window looking all cliched melancholic heroine of a romance novel?? How relieved he was when he found him in the coffin??? Him still remembering Guillermo's card word for word???!! Knowing that this toxic dark sided devotion goes both ways???!!! Borrowing the words of Fleabag: THIS IS A LOVE STORY.

Seriously, I know all these soft Nandor moments are here so the heartbreak when he learns about Guillermo being turned it's even bigger. But still denying that there is a romantic undertone between these two it's just being purposely adamant at this point (i'm looking at you wwdits reddit). Even if nothing explicitly romantic happens on screen, just by watching these moments, I know, we know.

Now, go listen to the ending song again. You will not regret it.

[lettuce-king]

In honor of wwdits s5 coming out soon im going to be listing batshit crazy theories bc at this point the more absurd the theory, the higher the chance of it existing.

Guillermo doesn't turn into a vampire but shows a lot of vampire tendencies. Its later revealed that Nandor wished for him to never be able to turn into a vampire but his slayer blood desperately wants him to be one and that's why he's still showing symptoms

Aka slayer blood trope pulls and uno reverse

Colin Robinson's real name is Robinson Colin

This is what disqualifies him from winning the election that he would've totally won in a landslide

We get Greg/camera crew lore (plz I love them and I want to know everything abt them)

The Guide was actually the one that put the hex on Nadja a long time ago and they both forgot

The Djinn gets hella bitches this season

Nandor gets emotionally attached to that carousel

Sean doesn't even actually come out, he just says something and it's misinterpreted as a coming out

Alternatively, they're all incredibly gay

Guillermo fucks that old man (guess)

Its revealed that Laszlo is only helping Guillermo so he can later on make him help him get his witch hat back from Simon the Devious

Now bc I wanna add a bit of ✨spice✨

Series finale hot take:

camera crew looks back at all the footage and says "wow go girls, you gave us nothing" and deletes the footage of the entire show

[dont-offend-the-bees]

When He Comes Around (My Feet Don't Touch the Ground)

In which Nandor sleeps upside down like a bat and the author somehow uses this very silly premise as an excuse to be disgustingly sappy

(read on Ao3) (registered users only)

I'm digging through some drafts and WIPs atm and I found this silly lil thing nearly finished, so I added a few more words and gave it a quick spit polish and here it is! Hardly a masterpiece but now it's out of my WIP file xD

Anyway, this literally came about bc I thought it would be funny if Nandor slept upside down, and then I accidentally got a bit cute and feels-y with it. Each small section is a different timeskip, so section one is like season one -- the simple familiar!Guillermo days -- section two is like, season 4 where the Colin plot is happening but the Nandor's wives plot isn't, or something. Basically a s4 where they're actually *not* being total dummies about their feelings. (I know. Unrealistic.) And section three is in the futurrrreeee but not with any mind to being season 5 compliant bc I wrote most of it before then. They are far too emotionally intelligent in this fic but what do you expect from a 2k-ish bubble of fluff.

Anyway, hope you like!

*

“Master?” Guillermo knocks gingerly, voice soft and welcoming. If he doesn’t ease Nandor out of his slumber gently, he’ll be bitchy all night. “Master, it’s nightfall.”

No answer. Guillermo takes a deep breath, and carefully nudges the door open, slipping into the darkened crypt like a shadow.

He calls out a couple more times, keeping his voice soft as he flits around lighting candles. He’s done a full circuit of the room before he gets any response: a quiet creak creeps under the closet door, followed by a low groan. “Guillermo? It feels early…”

“Days are getting shorter,” says Guillermo, apologetic. As if the relative distance of the sun and the earth is his fault, somehow. He’ sure Nandor could find a way to blame him for it somehow. He walks over to the closet door. “If you want we could set a time for the rest of the winter, I mean, you don’t have to be up all night. Ready, Master?”

“Yes, I am ready.”

Guillermo tugs the closet door open, squinting into the dark beyond as his soft candlelight creeps into the shadowed nook. It always takes his eyes a second to adjust; to pick out the details of his Master beyond the vague outline of a large, gently swaying object dangling from the ceiling.

Nandor blinks in the light, eyes heavy-lidded and mouth in a grumpy frown. His long, dark hair hangs straight down from his head, nearly brushing the floor as he peers at Guillermo upside-down, arms crossed tightly over his chest. With his legs hooked over a metal bar near the ceiling, his face dangles a few feet above the floor– and Guillermo sinks easily down to one knee. His master hates it when he ‘looms’ in the morning. The full weight of Nandor’s sleepy gaze lands upon Guillermo’s face as he comes within eye level.

“Good morning, Master,” says Guillermo, smiling as he tugs the door open wider.

Nandor squints his eyes and yawns like a cat before he answers in kind. “Good morning, Guillermo.”

“Sleep well?”

“Yes, for a very short while,” Nandor grumbles, stretching his arms above his head and cracking his back. “Eeesh. Daylight savings. I do not understand it.”

“It’s to do with the sun, Master,” says Guillermo, shuffling back and bracing himself in position with one hand extended and the other planted on the doorframe. “And the way we revolve round it.”

Nandor snorts in amusement. “Ah, Guillermo, clearly you are not a man of science. The sun goes around us.”

Guillermo bites his lip. “Of course, Master. Ready to get up?”

Humming, Nandor reaches out to take Guillermo’s offered hand. Once safely anchored he drops, flips round and lands gracefully on his feet with that strange vampiric control over gravity he has, bare toes sinking into the plush carpets piled at the bottom of the closet. Now he’s the one looming, arcing high into the air over Guillermo on his bended knee, an imposing figure even in the soft white drapes of his sleeping clothes. Like he’s a flawless greek statue, carved worshipfully from marble; and Guillermo is praying at his feet.

But the hand in his own isn’t marble, pale and cold though it may be. And the way it clings to Guillermo’s a few breaths longer before releasing him feels too human to be godly.

*

Guillermo’s gaze wanders around the crypt, quiet and curious. He’s been in here, of course, many times. But it’s funny how being relieved of his familiar duties has drastically cut down on his time spent in Nandor’s space. Several candles have burnt down and not been replaced yet and there’s a pile of long-overdue laundry, but otherwise it’s surprising how not-messy it is. But then, Nandor’s always been a bit of a neat freak; he just got complacent for a while with someone else to do the cleaning for him.

“Ah, yes, I have been meaning to do those,” Nandor gestures to the pile, and it may be Guillermo’s imagination but he seems embarrassed. “With the help of the all-knowing Google I discovered a local washerwoman; she has the machines and the dry cleaning, and she stays open very late. I meant to go today but the nights, they are so short…”

“Daylight savings strikes again,” Guillermo jokes softly, crossing over to the pile. “I can do it.”

“You do not have to –”

“No, it’s– it’s fine. I mean, not all the time. But you’re right; nights are short right now, and the days are, uh, long. Real long. I don’t mind running to the dry cleaners for you.”

Nandor regards him with a flash of vulnerability softening his eyes; his hands stay clasped sweetly in front of his chest. “Thank you, Guillermo.” Clearing his throat, he reaches for the clasp on his cloak. “I suppose it is time to turn in.”

Guillermo politely turns his back while Nandor disrobes, running his fingers along the mantelpiece. It’s a little dusty; maybe he should get Nandor one of those handheld vacuums to help him keep on top of it. Another tentative throat-clear has him turning round shortly, finding Nandor in his soft sleep clothes, his clothes from the day held gingerly in front of him in a neat pile. Guillermo smiles and takes them, adding them to the rest.

“Thank you. I appreciate it.” Nandor hesitates, then adds after a minute’s deliberation: “And you.”

Guillermo’s heart does some kind of tap dance. “Yeah, you better,” he jokingly deflects.

“You should go and do something fun; while you are out,” says Nandor. “Take advantage of the long day.”

“I’ve gotta be around for Colin.”

“Perhaps you could take him with you? If he is awake. The boy is a daywalker, too; he should have the chance to play in the sun.”

There’s something so wistful in Nandor’s voice it almost brings a tear to Guillermo’s eye. He nods. “Yeah. Maybe I will.”

Nandor nods. “I hope the two of you will have fun. I would join you; if it would not burn me to little vampire crisps.”

“Maybe we’ll go to the dog park. I’ll take pictures for you.”

“That would be nice.” Backing up to his closet, Nandor turns and hooks his hands over the doorframe, swinging his legs up and casually defying gravity to hook his knees over the bar. Releasing the frame, he swings into position, long hair dangling, upside-down eyes regarding Guillermo warmly across the room.

A small laugh breaks free. It’s been so long since Guillermo’s been around to see Nandor’s ridiculous nightly routine. He’s actually missed it. He steps closer, brushing his hands over the expensive, ornate coffin that Nandor never uses because he prefers to be upside down, for some goddamn reason. Guillermo remembers fondly the day Nandor admitted to him that his finds being cooped up flat in the casket uncomfortable. Guillermo had gone all around the house, collecting up blankets and furs and rugs, treating everything moth-eaten and then drowning out the chemical smell in oils and scents he knew Nandor loved. He remembered installing the strongest chin-up bar he could find in that closet, as high as he could make it go without cutting off leg room, remembers lining the floor and walls with every soft and luxurious thing he’d found. But most of all he remembers Nandor’s face when he’d showed him; for all of Nandor’s little smiles and laughs he’d seen in his time serving, he thinks that’s the first time he’d ever had one directed at him. Stepping over, Guillermo leans on the doorframe and takes a peek inside, looking at the little nest he’d built with his own two hands.

A new addition to the soft wall hangings catches his eye. He raises his eyebrow. “That’s new.”

Nandor’s eyes flick to the very familiar green sweater. He looks back sheepishly. “Yes, well. You left it lying around. It is soft.”

“Looks good.”

Nandor relaxes minutely, hands clasped again. “Between you and me; I am thinking that this space is a little too small, these days. What if someone wants to sleep over?”

Biting back a smile, Guillermo feels the wall through the soft drapes, crouching to get a feel of the join where it meets the floor. “Hmm. guess you may be able to knock out one of these walls, extend the space a little. I can help.”

“Thank you, Guillermo.”

Guillermo feels the words tickle across his cheek, and that’s about how he realises his exploration has brought him in barely a few inches from Nandor’s upside down face. He has an up close view of Nandor’s dark, bright eyes, his furrowing brow, the pinch of his sharp canine as it bites his lip.

And then a hand alights on Guillermo’s cheek, right where the thanks did just seconds ago.

“Thank you,” says Nandor once more, soft. “For everything you do.”

He draws him close, and Guillermo goes; still on his knees, but now his beautiful god is praying back.

*

“Guillermo?”

“Nandor.”

“You are on my side of the closet.”

Guillermo opens one eye to peer at Nandor, incredulous. “...Seriously?”

Nandor tsks, wiggling his toes in the thick, plush pile of the rug. “I always sleep on the right side, Guillermo!”

“It only has sides because I helped you expand it.”

“Yes, and I like the right one!”

Guillermo clicks his tongue. He likes the right side, too – mainly because it was the side directly by the closet door, and years of protecting his former master from vampire assassins had him pretty geared towards placing himself in the vulnerable position. But then again, he and Nandor had a lot more of the same biological advantages and disadvantages than they used to these days. Rolling his eyes, Guillermo shuffle his knees, edging along the pole into the dark nook of the newly exposed left side of the closet. “Fine. But don’t come crying to me when you get murdered first.”

Nandor scoffs. “If anyone is foolish enough to intrude on our slumber, Guillermo, I think it will be them who is murdered first.” He smiles brightly when Guillermo finishes his shuffling. “Thank you. I’m coming innnnn!”

Guillermo laughs as Nandor swings himself onto the bar. Jeez, he’d married a dork. For fucking eternity. “Okay, okay. Get the door, mi vida?”

With a wave of Nandor’s hand, the door swings shut with a quiet click, another wave sliding the heavy precautionary deadbolt. Guillermo still needs him to teach him how to do that.

“Alone at last,” says Nandor in a low voice.

Guillermo bites his lip and shuffles a little closer to Nandor’s side, until he can press their hips together. “Uh oh. I know that tone.”

Nandor chuckles softly, and in the darkness Guillermo feels a soft, dry kiss press to his cheek. “Hmm. Maybe later; I am tired. It has been a long night.”

So is Guillermo, honestly. It has been a long night, and a cold one – where the hell are the sprawling days of summer when you need them? Fucking daylight savings. But he gives Nandor a teasing prod in the side anyway. “You’re getting old.”

“And don’t you be forgetting it,” says Nandor, haughty and self-important. But in their cosy, homey dark his arms wrap around Guillermo to tuck him in close, his voice ducking just low enough for Guillermo’s vampiric ears alone to catch. “But you keep me young.”

*

Thanks for reading <3 If you wanna chuck me a comment/reblog I'll love you forever

[devilofthepit]

also while i’m at it i just got caught up on wwdits and mannnn i wish it were better. that’s another show that i have so much appreciation for as it was a past hyperfixation and therefore it’s still so important to me but i really cant feel the way i used to about it. this season is better than s4 don’t get me wrong but it still has the same problem which is that there really is no plot. i get that it started out as the funny vampire show but then all of the contradictions and complications that arise from vampirism like guillermo’s familiarhood(?) and nandor’s existential crisis really end up grounding the show and giving it somewhere to go. these plots run throughout the first three seasons and by season 3 it’s evolved past just a funny sitcom about vampires who live together. i say this all the time but the end of s3 was so so well done where it felt like the stakes (hehehe) we’re continually being raised each episode and that was such a good cliffhanger and then it just went downhill. since then there haven’t been any really complex season long arcs that get the attention they deserve. s4 was almost entirely putting the characters in one situation or another without it affecting anything else. s5 feels like that a little as well although the writing is marginally better. at least we have guillermo’s vampirism and laszlo and nadja keeping it a secret i like how this heightens the tension but it always somehow feels like a background thing to all the other silly things that happen in the episodes, it really feels like the writers don’t know how to weight different aspects of the plot. and meanwhile the relationship between guillermo and nandor (and the rest of the vampires too) never seems to change. i know the point is that they’re vampires and they can never see him as one of them but there are sooo many times throughout all 5 seasons where the vampires’ mistreatment of guillermo is brought up but there’s absolutely No evolution which makes sense to some extent bc they’re vampires but at this level is so interesting like truly no one is changing from episode to episode except guillermo (quite literally) and even that isn’t focused on enough compared to like. various characters running for comptroller or nandor making a new friend. and all of this especially after nandor promising to make guillermo a vampire and the way their relationship evolved at the end of season 3. nandor and guillermo’s relationship is the most central relationship, even the most central conflict of the entire show. i love nadja and laszlo dearly but their relationship isn’t really going anywhere except for maybe the antipaxan family storyline which got resolved within an episode. guillermo himself could have been the most central character given that he’s the first person we see, the one we most relate to, etc, but he’s relegated to the background in favor of Vampire Antics. and when i, tumblr user boydykecreature, formerly bloodcreature and thousandyearoldvampire, am complaining about too many vampire antics, it’s a problem. i used to love the novelty of this show and now it feels like the same thing over and over.

[cookinguptales]

wwdits tarot: the fool

Well, now that I've finished tarot weekend… time to talk about my WWDITS tarot ideas!

I wrote a couple posts about how I would assign a few of the major arcana if I were making a WWDITS tarot deck, and a few people asked me for my thoughts for the rest of the deck.

And… I’m down! I collect tarot decks and studied tarot in college, so I’m a giant nerd about this shit. I’ll be happy to talk to you about my ideas.

(Just remember that you asked for this.)

Because some of these are fairly complex, I decided to just do one meta post per card so I can talk about both the card symbolism and the character in question. Some are gonna be simple and silly, others will have quite a bit of thought behind them. I'm working off the Rider-Smith-Waite tarot for this, like most decks do, so that's the imagery I'll be discussing.

So uh. Yeah. Let’s get started with 0. The Fool.

(under a cut bc this is long and has images)

You might think I’m going too literal with this one, but I promise everything I’m about to say will make sense when I’m done. For The Fool, I’ve chosen Sean Rinaldi.

You might be thinking I’ve done this because Sean is kind of a dopey character. Foolish, if you will.

NO.

The Fool in tarot is a card of fresh beginnings, innocence, and infinite potential. The imagery is usually of a young man starting out on a journey. He’s young and carefree and naive. He hasn’t had the experience he’ll have soon, and he doesn’t know what’s coming — but he's ready to find out.

I chose Sean because in many ways, his friendship with the vampires has given him a new lease on life. The Sean we saw at the beginning of 2.03 was tired and irritable. He’d lost a lot of the innocent happiness and optimism he’d had when he was younger, as well as the kindness and affection that had accompanied it. Charmaine pretty much said as much when she talked about what a great guy he’d been when they were dating.

But after getting his brain scramblied, Sean really was able to take fresh new steps into a life he was living as if for the first time. And since then, he’s managed to get new friends, new business opportunities (more… or less…), new adventures, etc. He’s come to love the vampires and be loved in return. He has a great relationship with his wife and his friends. He’s happy, and there’s a sort of carefree spring in his step that suits The Fool well.

Unlike a character like Guillermo, who had infinite potential at the beginning of the series but has already made quite a bit of progress through his journey, Sean still feels fresh, new, and full of possibility. He’s literally pretty foolish and silly, yes, but he’s also just beginning to dip his toes into this supernatural world — and I strongly suspect that he’ll end up in there pretty deep by the end of the series.

There’s also a sense that there’s more to Sean than has been fully revealed, especially regarding his ability to withstand hypnosis, and I think we’re really just starting to see his journey unfold.

He approaches the vampires with friendly naïveté and seems to enjoy new activities — as long as they don’t get too scary. Even though he’s constantly getting into weird, dangerous, and scary situations (like… bankruptcy) he seems to bounce back with an enviable enthusiasm and joy.

In addition to all that, The Fool (archetypally speaking) is a figure that seems silly and naive but has a tendency to be able to see things more keenly than others and is able to speak truth in situations where others aren't allowed. I think Sean slides rather neatly into this as well; not only can he resist hypnosis more and more as the show goes on, sometimes he'll say something remarkably perceptive — and you have to wonder how much he's really picking up on what's going on around him.

(Plus... I just think it’s really funny that the Rider-Waite-Smith card has a little puppy on it and he reacted so very badly to the vampires' “puppy pile”. RIP my sweet cheese, my rotten soldier, my good-time boy.)

So if I were to design a card with Sean... The Fool is usually on a cliff with his bindle, and the imagery reminds me a lot of Sean's look during The Pine Barrens. The gun over his shoulder and the way he's dressed for a journey, a little companion at his side... I think I'd try to adopt some of that imagery but I'd add in some bats for good measure.

IN CONCLUSION, due to his relationship with the vampires, Sean has become what is essentially a blank slate that is constantly being wiped clean. But he seems happy that way, naive and fresh and thrilled with the world, and his story — his new story — is just getting started.

Tune in next time for The Magician!

wwdits tarot masterpost

[natjennie]

rewatched the news episode bc my mom is behind a week and good fucking lord it is so sad that guillermo came home from being forced to take a hard look at how cut off he's become from his human family, hoping to commiserate with and help out his vampire family only for them to immediately push him out of the way and claim they've managed fine without him.

and the moment after nandor is like "we figured it out ourselves" and then guillermo goes "okay" and walks away, there's a second where nandor is like "wait what?" which is so fascinating to me because it reads like he was expecting guillermo to fight back, to stick up for them harder. to insist on their cooperation. but he doesn't. he's so downtrodden and isolated, neither human nor vampire, that he just gives up. immediately. if they're not willing to work with him he's not going to try anymore. and it takes nandor aback because up until now every attempt guillermo has made to distance himself from the vampires has ended with him crawling right back, saving them, fixing their mess and getting himself right back into their lives.

but this time he just. doesn't. and nandor is so certain he's going to he like. falters. just. the moments this season so far where nandor and guillermo have been slightly out of step, like they're both doing their classic moves but at different tempos, never quite lining up. their co-dependence is rearing its head so completely. think about how little scenes they've had together recently. think about all the ways nandor is out of the loop. they've become ships passing in the night and as a result the family is like. crumbling. it's soooooo.... the fact that they pretend they don't need guillermo but nandor spent the whole episode screaming for him. yknow.

I don't know this post got away from me but like. good god this season.

[talktonytome]

no, bc now that we see how attuned Nandor has been to Guillermo, knowing he wasn’t cut out for vampirism, the reason he has never made a move is bc he knew all along that guillermo would stay human and would eventually leave him so he spared himself the heartache. someone sedate me !!

[shan-helsing]

SSHIP HEADCANONS + VERY BRIEF laszlo hc background

SORRY I FELT TOO CRINGE TO REBLOG, I HATE BEING SEEN BY ANYONE AAAUUUUGH

ANYWAYS. in regards to the whole thing with laszlo and nadja being disapproved off by the aristocrat society..club? committee? i thought about this a LOT with wulfric too.

SO i know back in july i shared wulfric's background but i think i have a better idea for it now.

the committee/society (i'll just call them arisocrats) was involved of wealthy old men, men of high academic scholarships. the way to get in to this crew was through nepotism honestly. this committee was not just seen in london but all across each capital city in every country. this crew was the only connection laszlo had to his father, he HATED his father, yet he stuck with the aristocrats because he had..SOME hope of earning love and recognition from his father. he studied various fields of arts, sciences, the whole shi-bang in hopes to make his father proud. he was close to his mother and nanny, but not in the parental way with his mother. ultimately this guy had 0 PROPER love and affection from his parents. (OKAY THAT'S IT ON LASZLO NOW IT'S JUST FULL SSHIP)

wulfric's father was also top of ze range in HIS capital's committee (still uncertain if it should be germany or what would NOW be austria - i'm not too keen on history learning for this shit)

idk if i've states this but wulfric has t boy swag, so he immediately had no chance at becoming part of the aristocrat community. however he was a great scholar (i might just FULLY self insert and say yea. classics. he knows classics. BUT he's a silly vampire bimbo now so it wouldn't even matter to him anymore) and kiiiinda used this to his advantage. he forged a letter pretending to be his father and sent it over to london to accept wee wulfric into this committee, THEY had no idea he was a little t boy swagger.

of course he got accepted and he left his home, sailing to england to be part of said community there and further his studies. he met mr golden boy leslie cravensworth and because they were a similar young age they bonded very quickly.

a little too much bonding bc they got really intimate and spoke a little bit too much about themselves to one another. they never made anything official..but they did have a few kissie koos. they wanted to remain a secret..thing. in their heads their mentality was like "yea. look at these (aristocrats) bozos; we are doing this and thinking differently from these guys and they all have no idea" kinda like a teenage adrenaline rush of doing something you know is wrong.

this whole situationship would go on for AGES, probably until laszlo was turned by nadja. wulfric was never told personally by laz that he was a vampire, he found out with the rest of the aristocrats - big YEOWCH on terms of their situationship. laszlo marrying nadja meant that he was forbidden from being part of the aristocrats with the position he had, he had to be degraded immensely to a title that was so revolting yadda yadda yadda. before laszlo left however (literally like a month or something after he became a vampire) wulfric BEGGED to come with laz, like proper random DESPERATION. then yaaaay yippee wulfric became his first familiar WOOHOO!

they got intimate again. but it was difficult to adjust to because new baby vampire/mortal human..and also his hot sassy VAMPIRE WIFE. (there is no beef between wulfric and nadja they are so totes besties post-turning)

about a month again, or some period of time SUPER close to when wulfric had first became a familiar, laszlo turned him. he didn't realise familiars kinda..NEVER get turned by their masters..but it's ok he just became a vampire guys it's cool.

wulfric got his huge bat ears bc the first blood he drank after his turning WAS a bats - like with s5 and guillermo laszlo had no consideration whatsoever to the thought of wulfric having human blood. so wulfric got his hairy big bat ears and ridiculous silly appearance :3 then he had human blood so it's all so okay now.

i think ultimately wulfric just ended up leaving nadja and laszlo because of boredom or wanting to travel again. but also the funny imagery of laszlo shipping wulfric to who knows where is also funny. idk i shouldn't be so serious about this; it's a funny vampire show

[strawberryseeded]

ok more thoughts (tbh just typing out stuff until it makes sense) abt the wwdits finale cos i was kind of out of it/frustrated whn i made the last post lol ^^;

literally everything, EVERYTHING until now indicated that nandor didnt give a fuck about guillermo and he was gonna 100% kill him, actually, literally, for having another vampire turn him, since this is a HUGE disrespect towards him in the vampire world. and ill be honest we as the audience kind of know already that nandor does care abt guillermo... but we also know that nandor isnt really aware of this, and thats hes pretty selfish and proud (and also an idiot). so yeah, hes very well capable of killing guillermo tbh!! but he doesnt!!!!

instead, he tells guillermo hes too important for him to do that, and that hell be sad if he dies! AND he even helps him turn completely by giving him human blood. unusually quick to catch on to what the problem was, i might add. as if he had taken guillermo's vampire hunter's blood and how it would affect turning him into consideration before. AND when he realizes that guillermo is unhappy he not only -as i said before- is the 1st one to notice, but he IMMEDIATLY cooks up a plan to help him revert the process. a GOOD one (wtf) and again, very quickly too, as if he was expecting this turn of events. HECK HE EVEN SAYS THAT EXACTLY he says that he suspected/feared that guillermo wasnt 'cut out' to be a vampire, which i think is something that has come up before in the show but in context im sure we all brushed off as a mere excuse for not turning him, since thats just the reality for familiars in this universe.

in the end, they go back to how things were b4 guillermo was bitten. everything goes back to normal… right? right, except we as the audience have a different perspective on things.

again, we kind of knew that the vampire clique(?) uh yea idk sorry im calling them that rn lol) kinda, sorta, cares about guillermo. maybe. well, now its... somewhat? confirmed, via the guide subplot that vamps are assholes to others bc they just hv a vampire way of expressing things. then again, this whole thing was towards another vampire, and until the last episode they dont see guillermo as a (true) vampire.

so like okay whats these two (guillermo and nandor)'s deal then

ok so this is the first time i actually think abt this sorry im slow lol.. until now ive been just seeing things unfold and just kind of paying attention to some details or other's ppls opinions. BUT NOW(?) i can actually SEE (kinda) whats goin on !!!!! i have some Personal Opinions & Feelings after the s5 finale

clearly theres the plot embryo structure at play here, and i think i now understand guillermo's arc a lot better.

theres something he wants, somethings he's always wanted: to become a vampire. for some LONG 4ss time now hes been very frustrated bc his master doesnt seem to have plans for turning him any time soon. hes growing anxious bc of this but we know thats not the only reason; he clearly thinks the vampires in the house dont value him, dont see him as an equal. he thinks nandor doesnt care about him. and hes not entirely wrong, tbh.

the "final" decision to ask derek to turn him comes from mostly these feelings of being inadequate, of feeling like hes the only one who actually cares (about guillermo himself. about what he wants. about him and nandor's apparently dead end relationship)

so he gets sick of waiting, and he just goes to get what he always wanted by his own means.

and regrets it completely. so much so that at the end he makes the decision to turn back.

so... what it is what he truly wants, then? or, better yet, what does he need? his true wish. why did he want to become a vampire this whole time? what is he after?

in the last ep is also revealed that (apparently?? idk im gonna need a bit more context) its guillermo who choose nandor as his master. or at least, he genuinely thought nandor was a really good choice. the best even. he admires him, wants to be like him. wants to be near him.

guillermo probably admires the vampire's lifestyle more than being a vampire itself. he has a very supportive family but they are also... vampire hunters, so its clear they dont like vampires, and probably disagree with their lifestyle for that same reason, which obviously ties together with it being a religious family and also the fact that guillermo's sexuality is pretty obviously closeted.

ok im gonna leave it there i think the conclusion its p obvious at this point

but what about nandor??? welllll ok i think i got it but lemme try to figure it out entirely?

i think nandor's most important arc until now was... kind of the opposite but also the same as guillermo's. he tried to become human.

the reason he did this was bc he felt lonely as a vampire. yea being a vampire is cool as fuck but its kind of isolating in a way too when youve got no one to share it with. im not gonna go super in depth talking abt this bc 1) i saw this season whn it came out n havnt rewatched it since n dont wanna misquote anything -.-;; and 2) i think the meaning its also pretty self explainatory. im literally describing it and you can already tell what everything means. of course its guillermo who goes to get nandor back to tell him that thats not who he is.

ok moving on. nandor is p much still alone in the romantic/lifetime partner sense. he alredy tried changing who he is to get a partner (or at least, to have a place where he doesnt feel as lonely) and that didnt make him happy. NEXT, with the help of the genie (sorry idk if thats how u write it eng is not my 1st lang im lazy etc) he tried, on the contrary, to change all his partnerts to the point they werent themselves anymore to accomodate his needs and whims. he tried to find the "perfect" partner, one that did everything he wanted, exactly. well, surprise, that didnt work out either. that didnt make him (or anyone) happy.

at this point i think its p obvious that he needs to compromise with other people. hes too self absorbed, too focused on what he wants as an end goal and doesnt truly see who his partners are as people. for him, they just serve as a role, they just exist to feel this void he has, this loneliness.

woooow guillermo's and nandor's issues are way more similar than what i thought!!!!!!!!!!!wooooooooooow using my brain worked u guysss ^^

[allhallowstiel]

I know there's a rule about not 100% believing showrunners and writers and whatever but. him saying this has made me genuinely concerned for nandor's character.

[fismoll7secinv]

So that post where nandor dresses like glittering edward from twilight...

-----

Guillermo focused on cleaning the wax which dropped on a holder from one candle, careful not to let it spill on the furniture and suffer more painful cleaning later. Suddenly, he felt air shift behind him in an unnatural way, as if something approached him quick and unnoticed. His hair stood on end.

“I don’t sleep,” Nandor’s voice murmured just behind his ear, lower and quieter than usual. Guillermo froze.

“I am pale, only eat junk food, don’t like the sunlight… You know what I am.”

“Master, please,” he sighed.

“Say it. Out loud, say it!”

Guillermo stared into the distance as if wanting to look straight at the camera for any kind of mental relief before going along with Nandor’s roleplay. There was no camera though, so his eyes fell on an empty wall.

“A vampire,” he squeezed out as if strangled.

“Nyihihi,” a goofy laugh sprang up just behind him before the overbearing presence disappeared. Guillermo’s lips stretched slightly in a small smile. Maybe it wasn’t that bad.

“Now it’s your turn to dress, Guillermo.”

Never mind, this was going to be a tough night.

[beansprean]

What about MY batshit s5 predictions??

Derek tries to turn Guillermo and we think it doesn’t work but at the end of the series it’s revealed he hasn’t been aging

Guillermo is successfully turned for exactly one episode but his cousin bites him and he turns back

Guillermo accidentally turns Derek human again - cue a rotating door of vamps wanting to be human for a day to try pizza pie and go to the beach before having a friend turn them again. Guillermo charges $3000 per bite and buys his mom a penthouse

^ "I'm uhhh...selling my blood" "How you getting $70k a month for your blood, man?" "It's good blood, Miguel!"

^His family fully thinks he is a sex worker at this point

Nandor pretends to read the first 10 pages of every book in the house before finally getting up and realizing Guillermo isn't there

Nadja and Laszlo stage a divorce and then get remarried specifically because they came up with a new wedding song they want to use

Nandor wants his post-breakup hot girl summer and tries to go blond

^He discovers twitter and posts every thought he has or questions he thinks he's googling. His only follower is that goth kid from Minnesota

That goth kid from Minnesota, freshly 18, shows up to be Nandor's new familiar and continues to hover spookily around and have no lines

^The comedy is that they sneak up on everyone and freak the vampires out by being arguably more vampirey than anyone

Will-they-wont-they Colin and the Guide (guidinson?)

Guillermo turns Charmaine bc he accidentally pushed a tree over (doesn't know his own strength) and crushed her

In fact, Guillermo turns ANYONE who asks. He turns Jeremy. He turns Lilith. He turns a bus driver who compliments his cape. Accidentally amasses a giant loyal coven who worship him.

We time skip 100 years in ep1 and Colin is a baby again

^(possibly this is how long it takes Nandor to finish a book?)

^Laszlo selfishly destroys/walls off the memory room in the hopes of keeping his boy this time around

^New baby Colin is obsessed with one thing and one thing only: werewolves

Memo's Man Milk explodes bc Guillermo is now contributing his own and it's 10x more potent due to all his repression

Alternative: Memo's Man Milk crumbles bc Guillermo is now contributing his own and it actively ages the witches due to all his repression

Laszlo and Sean kiss a little

^this is kosher bc Charmaine is a vampire now and being a vampire turns you poly as well ofc

^Charmaine and Nadja kiss a little

Jenna randomly pops up in one episode and it's revealed she's actually been there the entire time but no one noticed her.

^Jenna and the Guide kiss a little

Baby vamp Guillermo gets stuck in bat form and has to slay some vamps at the same time (visualizing an stunt actor holding a fake bat to their face and screaming and running around like it's hurting them)

Nadja's next grand adventure: becoming a twitch streamer

^ baby Colin had infodumped to her about it before but she wasn't listening

^ she only plays Nancy Drew mysteries and goes off about her sexual escapades with Marie Antoinette during Treasure in the Royal Tower

^she becomes very popular as an extremely dedicated vampire larper

^she is banned from twitch after someone asks her to flash her tits for 50 subs and she's like *shrugs* ok

Nandor gets really into Young Sheldon and we all have to deal with that

Colin decides to watch the documentary recordings from his missing year and we get some deleted scenes

[saltysalmonkid]

Ok actually i need to talk about this bc its been annoying me for weeks but WHYYY the fuck are people so fixated on Guillermo's virginity???? Like i GET IT. I GET IT. Its part of the vampire mythos whatever. But the way some of yall talk about his virginity is so off like all that "omg hes ... saving himself for nandor🥺🥺🥺🥺" what are we, puritains???

Listen dont get me wrong this isnt me saying i want guillermo to have fucked like a jackrabbit or something cos i literally could not care less if guillermo is a virgin or not because it genuinely does not make a difference besides like. Inexperience whatever. I dont know maybe just check your weird purity culture esque mindset for two seconds and think about why guillermo being pure and sweet and virginal is so attractive and important to you. Okay thats all i got it out of my system now back to giggles and laughs with ye