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#because i don't know when to quit apparently
suiana · 2 days
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(yandere! zombie x gn! survivor reader) (im such a youtube shorts kid bruh this idea came to me because of a video i watched)
did you know that zombies retain their habits from when they were humans?
well you sure as hell do now, because why is your annoying neighbour still following you around?? he's literally fucking rotting???
"shoo! go away!"
you hiss at him, shooting a rubber band at him before quickly climbing up a tree. phew, you wouldn't be bothered by him from here. it's been like this for a few days now, your undead neighbour following you around as you did your best to survive in this ruined world.
you never really liked him, your neighbour that is. he's always been that one weird guy that keeps annoying you ever since he moved in. constantly knocking on your door and asking to have meals together, to getting to and from work at the same times as you... you're so sure that he was stalking you. how could it ever be a coincidence that he just somehow knew when you were going out and coming back from work?
but now you wouldn't ever know and it's not like you wanted to know anyway. ignorance is bliss after all. oh! he's also very stubborn and it's quite apparent in his zombie form.
"bweh."
"go away!"
the zombie hits at the tree you were sitting down on as he looks up at you with what seemed to be puppydog eyes. you could only grimace at the sight before checking through your supplies. shit, you're running out of stuff.
"ugh... i'll need to scavenge for food-"
"guh!"
you raise an eyebrow at your undead admirer before humming. right, you suppose it isn't that bad that you have him around... he gives you stuff that's useful and scares away other mobs (you think he eats them if they get too close to you). you would've actually coddled him like a dog if he wasn't trying to get into your pants or kiss you every second.
"thanks."
you lean forward and snatch the bad of chips from his rotting hands before stuffing it into your bag. mn, you could probably have that for your lunch and dinner tomorrow.
"let's see... i need to find a good place to sleep tonight."
"bwa! buh beh!"
your zombie immediately starts scratching at the tree bark before jutting his lower lip. huh...
"no, i'm not sleeping in your apartment."
"gah!"
you think you're starting to understand zombie language because why are you holding full on conversations with him??
"don't give me that face. you know our apartment complex is riddled with zombies. i don't want to be turned."
"kh... gur! rh..."
"you think i'm trusting you? i swear i saw our old neighbour lurking around there and he was an olympic sprinter."
you shake your finger at the zombie before sighing softly. why did this apocalypse have to happen? things were going great for you before this. you just had a raise and you were so close to landing a date with your hot boss!
if you didn't know any better you'd have thought that your little zombie admirer was the one who kickstarted this zombie apocalypse because of his jealousy. what did he work as before he turned? a scientist?
"tn... jhn... ngh..."
"don't act all sassy with me right now. it's not like i want to sleep in your place to begin with. you'd probably lock me in there with you and i'd be trapped."
"bah!"
rolling your eyes at the sassy undead man, you rest against the trunk of the tree and shut your eyes. might as well get some rest before setting off again.
"i'm going to rest now. help me keep an eye out."
"kah kah. jah?"
"no, i won't kiss you. and no, i most certainly won't reward you with myself. you're rotting, damnit! how many times do i have to tell you that?"
"ui..."
what in the sassy zombie apocalypse have you gotten yourself into?
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leclercsluvs · 2 days
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LN4 | Our Forever Moment
an: i still don't really know how much i like to make written fics, but i have ideas for them so i'm going to continue to try and write them, i think. my first language is NOT english, so sorry if there's any mistakes <3 pairing: lando norris x fem!reader, vasseur!reader (this is gonna be fun, lowkey not important, gets mentioned like a few times because i forgot) warnings: swearing (like twice) inspired by: mine - taylor swift word count: 6.2k
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As she’s being dragged to another race, she wonders when her dad is going to realize she's always running off and never in the garage of his own team, she doesn’t know that he’s fully aware she’s never there. She’s been welcomed by everyone she’s visited though, which does make him happy. She mostly goes to Mercedes and Red Bull, but lately Mclaren has been looking quite interesting. 
“Are you going to stay in the Ferrari garage today? Or am I gonna have to send someone over to Red Bull or Mercedes to find you?" Fred looks at yn with a playful smile.
“I didn’t think you noticed.” She's quite shocked. He always seemed to switch off being a dad whenever they stepped into the garage, so it never even occurred to her that he even wanted her there.
“Who do you think sends someone after you at the end of the day?” He turns back around as they get closer, “I think you, Charles and Carlos would be great friends if you gave them a chance,” they turn and walk into the Ferrari hospitality. “Oh speaking of boys, have you found a boyfriend I need to approve of?” He quickly looks back to see her surprised face before he turns back to see where he’s going, even though he could probably navigate it blindfolded.
“Well first of all, you wouldn’t need to approve of him, this isn’t the middle age,” yn lets out a small laugh, “and second, all of my relationships have failed, you’re partly to blame for pulling me to almost every race, and then I guess I’m just not girlfriend material.” She follows her dad around, because even if she does get pulled to all races, she usually doesn't hang out here for more than 5 minutes before she’s off to find Max or George. 
“Chérie, anyone not willing to spend the short time you're home isn’t worth your time,” he stops in his track turns around and puts a hand on her shoulder, “and I’m not sure if I ever said it, but if you truly would prefer to stay home and only travel to a few, that is fine. I would understand.”
She gives him a reassuring smile, “I know. You wouldn’t have been able to drag me out of the house if I didn't truly want to be here.”
He gives one quick smile before continuing walking, and before she knows it, she’s left to herself because he’s needed for something important.
~~~
It doesn’t take long for Charles to spot yn, sitting by herself, because apparently everyone else is busy today. “Yn? what are you doing here? I thought you’d be off doing something with Max?” Charles looks around to see if Max is around and he just hadn't seen him, but it’s a lost cause, which he should have realized, Max wouldn’t be seen anywhere near anything related to Ferrari. Except for Charles of course.
“No he’s busy. Everyone suddenly got busy.” She looks back down at her phone and the messages between her and her friend, however it would be rude to text back while Charles is in front of her, so she turns it off and stuffs it in her pocket. “I don't really remember the last time everyone, well except for you I guess, was busy at the same time.” 
“Well, I’m meeting Lando and Oscar for lunch, do you want to join us?” Charles asks with a smile, flashing some cute dimples. Not that anything could ever happen between the two. As attractive as Charles may be, her dad was his boss, and nothing good was going to come out of that. 
“I think I’d like that,” she smiles back as she picks up her bag with her essentials, “it’s nothing fancy right? I didn’t really get dressed for something over the top.” She looks down at the ripped jeans and the oversized t-shirt that she’s wearing. Not exactly the cutest outfit.
~~~
“So you still live with your dad?” Oscar asks curiously, they all seemed fairly happy she was invited by Charles. And Oscar, who she hadn’t really spent any time with, has been asking a lot of questions. 
“I do. I may be 21, but living at home is just a little easier. And I like spending time with my dad, even if I run off to other teams at the first chance I get.” She answers as she takes another bite of her food. Lando has been awfully quiet and it didn’t go over yn’s head. She was fully aware of how glued his eyes were to his food. 
“Is it weird? That your dad is responsible for a Formula 1 team?” Oscar almost forgets to eat, because of all the questions he’s asking.
“It was in the beginning, but I've gotten used to it by now,” she takes a sip of water. “Is he always this quiet?” yn looks at the way Lando is poking his food “and is he always just poking his food?” She questions, making Lando's eyes move up for just a split second and then back down to his food.
“No. He’s usually pretty chatty, maybe he’s just nervous for tomorrow," Oscar says, finally eating some of his food. “He doesn’t usually get like this before a race though,” Oscar leans his head a little to the side as if thinking about it, before poking a finger in Lando’s side making him jump a little. “What’s going on in that head of yours?” Oscar asks.
“Maybe he’s got a new crush,” Charles jokes, taking a bite of food just as Lando suddenly coughs and gulps down water.
“Are you okay?” Yn asks as Lando suddenly gets up from his chair avoiding any and all eye contact.
“No, I’m actually not feeling so great. I think I’ll have to cut this short if I want to be good to go by tomorrow.” He quickly gathers his things as everyone looks confused. “Bye!” And then he’s out of there.
“Well that was weird.” Oscar says as he goes back to eating
“Do you think it was me?” Yn looks at the rest of the men sitting around the table, a little sad that she may have ruined their lunch.
Charles smiles. “Yes,” he says, looking at yn, “but in a good way. I think I might be right, even if it was just a joke.” He lets out a laugh. “I’m sure there’s some truth to it.” He goes back to eating, and so does yn, deciding that maybe she’ll talk to Lando in private.
~~~
On his way back to the hotel, Lando struggles to figure out his emotions. Of course yn is absolutely gorgeous. But considering she’s Fred's daughter he wouldn’t dare to think of her as anything but a friend. He may not race for Ferrari, but he still has a lot of respect for the man. And Lando knows about his reputation of not being able to keep his relationships going for long. Hopefully he can just subtly ignore her. Because the feelings, and thoughts he had during that lunch were not friendly. And before he even considers anything, he needs to make sure his feelings for her are romantic, and not just him finding her pretty.
~~~
Lando spent close to 4 months avoiding yn to the best of his abilities, and when he wasn’t ready and she caught him off guard he made up some weird excuse about needing to look at data, test the car, try some new Mclaren merch for photoshoots. Yn usually knew they were lies, and wondered why Lando was so set on avoiding her. To be quite honest, it brought down her mood, and she spent more and more time in the Ferrari garage and hospitality. Her dad sensed something was wrong. She was rarely there and suddenly she never left? Something was going on and he was going to get the bottom of it. 
“I see you’re spending time here today,” Fred sat across from yn. She was eating lunch. Alone. That was how she spent most of her time lately. All alone. Lando had unknowingly made her really anti-social.
“I guess.” She poked a little at the salad she had bought. She didn’t really want it anymore. 
“Did the others have plans?” Fred asks, looking around.
“I’m not sure.”
“Is something bothering you?” Fred asked, concerned for her daughter who used to have a lot to talk about. A lot of people to talk to, and who never spent time at lunch alone in Ferrari.
“Nope.” Fred sighed. He wasn’t going to get any answers. If it was because she genuinely just didn’t feel like talking today or if there was something wrong, he wasn’t sure. But he was gonna ask Max, or maybe Lewis to talk to her. He didn’t want her to be lonely. He got up from his chair. He had to get this started immediately. 
Fred’s quest to find Lewis was surprisingly easy. He found the soon-to-be Ferrari driver hanging out with Charles and Carlos near their own garage. “Lewis! Can we talk?” Fred called out before he reached them. Lewis just nodded and started walking towards Fred.
“Is it about my contract?” Lewis asked cautiously. He knew he hadn’t been performing that great in the Mercedes this year and was afraid Fred was going to only make it a year so he could be finished with him.
“No. I need you to talk to yn. She's suddenly spending a lot of time with Ferrari, but alone. Which, as you may know, isn’t where, or how, she usually spends her time.'' Fred looks really concerned, and it’s like it’s transferred to Lewis immediately. He’s known yn ever since her dad started dragging her along. She would usually spend time with George when she went to Mercedes, but sometimes when George wasn’t there and she just wanted to be somewhere else, Lewis and yn would play some games. Usually chess. Lewis was definitely better than yn but she still loved it. They could often lose track of time and suddenly one from the Mercedes team would come and get Lewis to either do some media related stuff or because it was time to get ready for a race.
“Of course! Now that you mention it, I haven't seen her around Mercedes for quite some time now. I’ll see what I can do, if I can't figure it out, I'll have Max ask her. They’ve always had quite a special bond I don't understand” Lewis gives the man a reassuring smile and a clap on the shoulder “Don’t worry, we’ll get her back to her talkative self very soon.”
“Thanks Lewis,” Fred looks relieved, but only for a second when his eyes widen. “Do you think Max did something to her? To make her feel this way?” He looks around as if he's scanning the surroundings for Max. And good thing he isn’t around. It wouldn’t have been a good outcome.
“I doubt it. He’s always been nice. Especially to her,” when he realizes how that may sound to the man in front of him and the way his eyes narrow, he quickly adds “as a friend. Not romantically. I’m pretty sure he’s actually in a relationship.” Fred seems to almost relax at those words and gives Lewis a quick pat on the shoulder
“Hurry up and get my daughter back. I miss her.” and with that he walks off. Hopefully not to find Max. And if so, Lewis sure is glad he isn’t Max right now.
~~~
When Lewis finally finds yn sitting just on the outside of the track he’s surprised she was allowed. But then again she probably just mentioned being Fred's daughter and she was allowed. “Hey there. Looking cozy. Mind if I join you?” He doesn’t wait for a response, just sits down next to her on the grass.
“What do you want?” She asks. Not really feeling the company right now.
“You haven’t been spending much time with George lately. Have you been spending more time with Max?”
“No.” Straight to the point. But not really the point Lewis was looking for.
“Have you been spending time with Charles and Carlos? Since you’re spending so much time with Ferrari at the moment?”
“Would that be a crime?” She looks at Lewis, and he sees something different. Her eyes don't look as alive as they usually do. They’re missing the glow that makes yn herself.
“Yn, is something wrong? You know you can talk to me. Or Max,” he waits for a second, not sure if he should continue, but as she starts plucking at the grass without answering he decides she needs to know. “Your dad is worried about you.”
“Oh.” She answers, plucking a few more grass straws
“Did something happen?” Lewis asks, trying a different approach.
“I don't know. Maybe you should ask Lando.” Lewis is unsure what Lando has to do with this entire situation, but he promised Fred to get to the bottom of it, so he will.
“Did he do anything?” Lewis is ready to fight Lando. “If so, I’ll gladly talk to him”
“Well, maybe he’ll talk to you,” yn shrugs and gets up from the grass. “I have no idea what I did to him. He seemed happy enough about me being invited to join him, Oscar, and Charles for lunch a couple months ago, and then during lunch he was so quiet, barely looking up from his food and then he suddenly said he wasn’t feeling great and needed to leave.” Yn turns around and looks at Lewis, tears starting to form in her eyes. “He has ignored me ever since. Every time I’ve tried to talk to him he either runs away or makes up some dumb excuse to get away from me,” she wraps her arms around herself as if to protect herself. “I’m sorry,” she says, shakes her head and turns around again and starts walking away. “I shouldn't have put all of this on you. I'm probably just overthinking it anyway.”
"Wait!" Lewis is quick to get up from the grass and gets a hold of yn’s arm, ”I’m glad you told me. Let me talk to Lando. See if I can figure out why he’s avoiding you. Maybe there’s a reason,” yn smiles a small smile, but it’s better than the empty expressions she's had lately. “Nice to see you’re still capable of smiling.” Lewis returns it with a smile of his own and guides her towards the Mclaren hospitality. “Now let’s get to the bottom of this.”
“Thank you. Not just for this, but also for always putting up with my bullshit.” Yn looks straight ahead. She wasn’t exactly planning on saying any of that, but oh well. It won’t hurt anyone. 
Lewis just laughs and pushes her lightly. “You should be grateful. It's impossible to keep putting up with it.” If he wasn’t laughing while saying it, she would have been hurt, but she just laughs with him and follows him, to hopefully get some answers from Lando.
~~~
Lando was not expecting to see Lewis, so he wasn’t able to run off as quickly as he usually does, and when he spots yn behind Lewis, he tries to make up some excuse about having to talk to an engineer about a possible car problem but Lewis stops him. “Lando. That’s enough.” He puts a hand on Lando's shoulder before he gets a chance to run off. “Why do you keep running away from yn?”
Lando sighs, he can’t run away from it anymore. “I kinda would prefer for this conversation to happen between just me and yn.” He runs a hand through his hair and down the back of his neck. 
Lewis looks back at yn, then at Lando, then back at yn, “are you fine with that?” He asks, while she nods and follows Lando into his drivers room
“So.” Lando starts, not really sure how to get the conversation going.
“Why have you been ignoring me for the past 4 months?” Yn asks, wanting to get this solved as soon as possible. “Did I say something that upset you so much during lunch that day?” Yn can feel the tears threatening to spill over, but she would like to get through this conversation without crying.
“No! Oh my god. Not at all!” He turns around because he’s not sure he can look at her while telling her this. “I think I might, sort of, have feelings for you.” The room is filled with silence. Lando is almost afraid she ran out of the room, If it wasn't for the fact he could hear her breathing. 
“So you decided the best action was to avoid me?” Yn asks, with a playful grin. If she had known this was all it was she would have had someone talk to him earlier. 
Her playful tone makes Lando turn around with a sheepish smile. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have ignored you or run off every time you tried talking to me. I was just afraid I would end up spilling a full love confession, and I’m not sure your dad would be too happy with that.”
“Well he doesn’t get a say in my love life.” Yn closes the distance between her and Lando. 
“I suppose you’re right.” Lando takes a step forward, making the distance between them smaller.
“So are you going to be doing anything about it?” Yn tilts her head slightly.
“When I have planned it,” Lando smiles and takes a step back as he feels a vibration in his pocket. “Damn, I actually do have to go now,” a text from his engineer asking him to come back for a meeting. Lando grins and walks towards the door, “but you're totally free to stay here until I’m back. And trust me, I’ll be spending the entire meeting planning the perfect way to ask you out.” He flashes a quick smile before he's out of the door and yn is left alone in the room. But this time being all alone is different. She doesn't feel all alone. She’s the happiest she’s been in four months.
~~~
“I have the perfect plan.” Lando and Oscar are doing a track walk just to have something to do and make sure the track is fresh in their memory for the practice the next day. 
“Yeah?” Oscar isn’t really sure it’s going to be as perfect as Lando thinks it is. “Are you totally sure about that?” He questions, raising an eyebrow, while taking in the surroundings of Monaco.
“I’m 100% sure.” Lando nods. He knows exactly what he’s going to do. He’s in fact not going to ask directly. He’s made a fun little game, and got a few drivers in on it. “Just promise me to not ruin it when she comes to you.” Oscar sighs. He obviously isn’t going to spoil it.
“How are you going to ask her? If you aren’t doing it directly.”
“That’s a surprise.” And no matter how much Oscar pushes, Lando doesn't tell. Just smiles and shakes his head.
The next day when yn arrives at the paddock Alex greets her as soon as she’s arrived. “For you.” He says and hands her a letter.
“For me?” Her face is full of confusion as she opens the letter. 
“Dear yn, I’ve made a little scavenger hunt for you. I hope you’re going to have fun. At the end you’ll find a surprise. Here’s the first clue.”
That’s the end of the letter. “So what's the clue?” If anything she's even more confused now, it doesn’t even say who it's from. It could be from George. But she doubts it. He’s never done anything like this before.
“Oh right, I almost forgot,” Alex rushes and pulls a small lego car from his backpack. more specifically a Mclaren lego car.
“So I'm guessing I have to go to Mclaren?” She questions and looks at Alex who just shrugs. So that’s where she heads to next. Who knows how long this is going to last. She does think it’s going to be fun though. She’s always loved clues.
As she gets closer to the Mclaren garage she finds Oscar standing looking around holding a letter in his hand. As he notices her, he walks towards her. “Here. From a mystery man.” He says, hands her the letter and walks off trying to look mysterious.
Yn laughs and opens the letter. This time, there’s no text. Just a card. “Happy fathers day.” She reads out loud. That’s all the card says. “I guess that means i’ll have to go to my dad?” She wonders out loud. Would this person involve her dad? Would her dad want to be involved? “Hm, probably just ferrari.” She says as she notices the card is mostly red.
She walks over to the Ferrari garage but can't find anything and decides it might be at the hospitality. As she enters the building she notices Carlos standing with a smile on his face and a whistle in his hands. “Here you go.” He hands her the whistle as she reaches him. 
“That's it? Not a letter? Anything to guide me more than-'' she looks down at the whistle now in her hand, “a whistle?” She looks back up at Carlos who looks around.
“Consider the first letter of the whistle.” He whispers and quickly walks off, whistling. 
“The first letter of whistle is w. So..” she thinks for a second. “Williams?” She laughs and quickly walks over to the Williams hospitality, but to her surprise finds no one, and decides it must be their garage then.
Here she finds Logan happily holding a small boat toy. “For you.” He says and hands it to her. Happy to be included. She smiles and wonders if this is the last one.
“Thank you, Logan.” She sends him a smile and walks to the dock to find a boat. Not really sure which type of boat, big or small. But she’s determined to find it. 
When she gets to the dock, she fears it’s going to take a long time, until she spots Charles casually sitting on a yacht. As she approaches she notices a full basket of red bulls sitting beside him. “I guess I’m going back to the track. To Red Bull. Their garage?” She is sure to get those 10k steps she’s supposed to get every day. 
“Yeah, if you want something to drink on your walk, I have plenty,” he pushes the basked towards yn and gestures for her to bring it, “in fact, let me join you on the way back, I was only sent here to give you the clue, and I don't drink Red Bull, so I can return it.” He smiles and gets up, taking the basket full of cans. “Are you having fun so far?” Charles starts walking back towards the track with yn following.
“Yeah. It’s a lot of fun,” she answers as she opens a can of the regular Red Bull, "I'm excited to see who set all of this up though” she looks ahead and takes a sip of the can.
“I can’t wait for you to see who arranged it,” he says. And that’s all he says. Yn tries to get more clues about who it is, but Charles’ mouth is shut. He’s not letting anything slip. And they arrive at Red Bull way earlier than yn was expecting so she doesn't get nearly enough time to interrogate Charles about who it is. 
“I see you’ve come to terms with the fact Red Bull is the best.” Max teases as Charles and yn are within hearing range of a normal voice. While holding a bouquet of flowers?
“Ha ha ha,” Charles smiles, as he hands Max the basket full of red bull cans, “I’m just keeping yn company, and decided to return these as I won’t be able to drink them.” Charles laughs and gets into a conversation with Max until yn clears her throat, reminding them she’s still there.
“I’m looking for a clue,” she says, begging that it's close to being over because she’s tired of walking from one side of the track to another over and over.
“Oh right,” Max hands her the bouquet of flowers he was holding. She takes them in her hand and her eyebrows furrow.
“What kind of clue is this?” She looks at Max whose eyes go wide.
“I forgot this.” He pulls a letter out from his pocket and hands it to her.
“Another letter. Is this the last one? I don't know how much more walking I can do.” She looks so defeated but reads the note.
“If you received this letter, that means you figured out all the clues. I know you were just there, but you can find me on Charles’ yacht. Where the big surprise is waiting.”
She looks up as she finishes reading. “He’s got to be kidding. I swear to fucking god, if this is George and he just made me walk from that yacht, back to the track and then back to that stupid yacht i’m going to go insane.” You look back at the letter. 
“My yacht isn’t stupid.” Charles pouts as Max hits him on the arm. “Ow?”
Yn sighs, “I guess I’ll get going. Thanks for the flowers I suppose.” 
“Oh they were not from me. They were from him. Just hurry up,” Max looks down at his phone, “practice starts kinda soon, and he can’t be late.” Yn starts walking back towards the yacht. She can't wait to kill the man that made her walk this much.
Lando however has been setting everything up ever since yn and Charles left. Strawberries covered in chocolate, and since he doesn't like chocolate, strawberries without chocolate, candles on a small table on the sun deck. As yn gets closer, Lando walks down to greet her. “I swear to fucking god George if this is yo-” her sentence gets cut short as soon as she sees Lando. “You set all of this up?”
“Yeah. You didn’t seem to like it that much?” Lando rubs the back of his neck. He wasn’t the best planner of a scavenger hunt.
“I kinda wasn’t the biggest fan of walking all the way out here, back to the track and then back here again.” She crosses her arms, but seeing the concerned look on Lando’s face she relaxes her arms and walks onto the yacht with a huge smile. “It was still kinda fun.” 
They spend a little while on the boat, sitting with their feet almost touching the ocean. Lando is not really sure if he should put an arm around her or not. He decides not to move too quickly and they just sit next to each other. “Oh I almost forgot,” she turns and looks at Lando. “I was supposed to tell you to hurry up, practice starts soon and you can’t be late,” she looks down at the strawberries, “but you distracted me.”
“Oh shit!” He gets up quickly and puts his shoes on, “meet me at the track! I would love to spend some time with you between practice 1 and 2!” He hurries up and practically runs all the way to the track.
~~~
For the next couple of weeks Lando spends a lot of time wondering how quickly to move forward. They spend a lot of time sitting near water, almost like the first time, except they don't have access to Charles' yacht every day. Every time Lando wonders if he should put an arm around her, but he never does. Until one day, when they’ve been sitting at the end of the gangway on the dock, their feet so close to the water, if they stretched them out their toes would be dipped in the water, and Lando’s arm comes closer and closer to making its way around yn. “Just do it already,” she says and leans on him, putting her head on his shoulder, “I've been waiting for the last many weeks for you to do it.” Lando can’t help but let out a small laugh and put his arm around her. 
“I wasn’t sure if you even wanted it.” He looks down at her quickly before looking back at the water. 
“I've been waiting for you to make some sort of move, so I knew if it would be appropriate to do this.” She says, as she sits back up straight and puts her hands on Lando’s cheeks and pulls his face closer. He puts his hands on her waist and pulls her closer while making sure none of them fall into the water. Her lips meet his softly, a tentative brush that sends a wave of electricity through her body. The kiss deepened, growing in confidence, and everything else faded away. All that existed was the two of them.
When they finally break apart, Lando puts his forehead against hers, a smile stuck on his face. He would never be able to forget this moment, and she wouldn’t either. “I’ve dreamed of this moment ever since that time Charles invited you to lunch.” Lando shares, not aware that yn has shared the same feeling since he shared that he had feelings for her.
“I was sure you’d do something about it sooner.” Yn lets out a small laugh and leans against Lando’s shoulder as he puts his arm around her.
“I was too afraid you didn't want to,” he says and lets out a sigh. “And I guess I just never thought to just ask.” 
“Well, you should have.” She smiles, before looking up at him, and he can’t help but smile back. They sit like that for a while. Just enjoying each other's company.
~~~
A couple weeks later, when they’re lying on the couch in Lando’s apartment, watching a movie, yn can’t help but smile, thinking about this moment, and how she never thought this would be a reality in her life. “Can you believe it?” She says in a soft whisper, her voice barely even audible.
“Believe what?” Lando asks, while his other hand mindlessly runs through the soft strands of her hair.
“This. Us. I never thought I’d be in such a happy relationship while traveling so much.” She says, softly tracing small circles on the back of his hand, that’s draped across her waist.
“Well I’m glad you're happy,” He says, placing a kiss on the top of her head, earning a soft hum from the woman. “You know, you could bring some stuff here. Just enough for a drawer if you don’t want to get too serious.” He mumbles, nuzzling his head into the crook of her neck.
She can’t help but smile, because she had been thinking of asking. “That would be nice, especially considering how much time I spend here.” She brings his hand up to her lips and places a soft kiss there, before going back to the movie.
~~~
It didn't take long for her to basically move in. It wasn’t official, but it might as well have been. She spent more time there than she did at her own home. But Lando didn’t mind. In fact, he loved having her there. They even started spending time together publicly, whether that was around Monaco when it wasn’t a race week, or if it was in the paddock. The fans had noticed how close they had gotten, and speculation quickly began. Were they a couple? Just friends? No one knew. Did Fred? No. But he wasn’t stupid, he knew something was going on, but he didn’t want to ask. But he didn’t mind, as long as yn was happy. And she was, for the first couple of months. And then it seemed like Lando had other priorities. Of course she knew racing was important to him, and she didn’t expect to suddenly be on the absolute top of his priority list, that would always be F1 and she knew that. However, that didn’t stop the feeling of neglect starting to spread through her. She knew he had a packed schedule, but she would often find herself wishing he had more time for her, yet it just seemed he got less and less time for her.
As the relationship between them progresses, small arguments make it to the surface. Usually sparked by the fact yn feels unimportant, or that Lando misses a date or an anniversary. It’s never his intention, and he always makes it clear that he loves her, but as it continues to get worse and worse, she begins to question it. She even stops believing him 100%.
It was 2 am. Lando had just returned back to the hotel after the race in Singapore. He silently opened the door to the room he was sharing with yn, expecting her to already be sound asleep on the bed, but to his surprise she was sitting up, leaning against the headboard with the bedside lamp on.
“Can we talk?” She asks, her voice soft but filled with a hint of vulnerability.
“Of course.” Lando quickly closes the door and walks over to sit on the edge of the bed.
“Look, I know racing is extremely important to you, that it’s everything to you, but,” she pauses for a moment, not really sure how he’s going to take this. “What about us?” She asks, her voice shaking slightly.
“I know it’s been tough, and I’ve not been the best, but I’m under a lot of pressure right now,” Lando looks up at her and he can see the way his words hurt, and he can’t help the defensive tone that creeps into his voice. “I didn’t have a choice.”
“Didn’t have a choice? You’ve always had a choice! You chose to sign up for all those PR events. All the additional promotional videos. Do you know how it feels to always be the last thing on your mind?” Her voice raises a little as the frustration takes over, and she searches Lando’s eyes for a reaction, just some sort of reaction.
“I never wanted you to feel that way,” Lando sighs and looks her in the eye, he genuinely never wanted her to feel like she was his last priority. “But this is my career, it’s what I’ve worked towards my entire life.” 
“And where do I fit into that? When you talk about your future, you’re talking about your next race, the next podium, the next win. I can’t continue to just sit back and wait for you to finally have time for me. I can’t continue to just be a spectator in your life, Lando.” The hurt is visible on her face, and she turns away momentarily to look out the window. The rain is subtly falling outside, and small drops of water roll down the window.
“I thought you understood when we got together.” He says, trying to defend himself. “This is my life, my dream. I never wanted you to feel like you're not important.” His voice softens, but his tone is still defensive as he tries to avoid addressing the core issue.
“I did understand. And I’ve been nothing but supportive, but it’s been months of you forgetting a date, or something else. And I’m not asking you to quit racing, I would never do that. All I’m asking is that I become a priority too. Because right now it feels like you’ve made a choice. And it’s not me.” Tears start to swell up in yn's eyes, and Lando is at a loss for words. He never wanted it to get to this point, but he doesn’t know what to say. He looks away, and that’s the last straw for yn. She swings her legs off the bed and grabs her suitcase that she packed as soon as she returned from the race, since they were planning to leave early in the morning anyway. “I’ll give you some time to think about all of this. But I won’t be waiting forever. Figure out if this is something you want. Because I can’t keep doing this.” And with those words she leaves the hotel room, and into the elevator.
She walks out into the rain, with tears flowing freely from her eyes. She stops and takes a deep breath. She doesn’t want it to end between her and Lando, but she also can’t continue to just be a bystander in her own relationship. As she grabs her suitcase and is about to begin walking she hears Landos voice. “Wait!” 
She turns around and sees him walking in long strides toward her, the rain already drenching his hair. “I don't want to lose you. I’ll never leave you alone again,” he says as he reaches her. “I remember how it felt when we were sitting by the water on our first unofficial date. Every time I look at you, it’s like I’m seeing you for the first time all over again. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” He places a hand on her cheek and gently rubs his thumb along her cheekbones. “Please don’t leave. We’ll make it work. I’ll make time for you. You’ll be my first priority, I promise.”
She looks up at him with an aching heart at the raw emotion in his voice. For a moment she wants to believe him, to just forget all the missed moments, but the pain is still too much. 
“You say that now, but what happens when life gets busy again?” She asks in a whisper, her voice shaking as she speaks. “What happens when I become the last thing on your mind again because something else takes priority?”
Lando’s hand trembles slightly against her cheek, but he doesnt pull away, and neither does she. The rain falls a little harder, and their breaths are visible in the cool air of the night.
“I won't let that happen.” His voice is filled with an urgency, a need, that she’s never heard before. “I know i’ve failed you, but this time-”
“”This time,” she interrupts him and takes a step back, resulting in his hand slipping from her cheek. “How do I know this time is any different?” She looks at him with tearfilled eyes, waiting for an answer she might not want. But it doesn’t come. Instead, Lando takes a step closer and his eyes are filled with so much love and hope.
“Because this time, I know what it’s like to lose you,” his voice is trembling and he pauses for a moment, searching for the right words. “And I can’t. I can't lose you.”
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destinationtrekk · 2 days
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young wesker who gets drunk and giggly with reader. at first he had been so... cold, so expressionless and absolutely cluelessly bone-dry on how to go about doing anything but a daylight two-step move-his-arms-a-little to the dance music blaring from somewhere, but that's okay, reader can show him.
and he enjoys it... and he's laughing, and his face is flushed, and the scent of vodka is deep on his tongue, and he has severely miscalculated his drink, but that's okay, because reader keeps him safe and happy and distracted the entire time.
at the end, as he begins to sober up, they can't seem to get out of him where he's supposed to go to now (perhaps he is trying to revel in it, this one normalcy, just one event he took on to learn how to behave like everyone else and got taught more about himself and his own interests than he'd ever planned, a snapshot of a life he could have lived if only--) so they take him back to their house and snuggle him up in a blanket burrito on the couch, making him drink water, take an advil, a tylenol.
and as he gets back to himself and they smoke a cig, talking about life as he gets rather quiet and inward again (for he cannot share, he has nothing positive or appropriate to), they do something unexpected and yet wholly welcome, a gift to close out the night: they give him a quick, brief and fleeting shotgun kiss, hand warm on his cheek, before they send him off for a nap, telling him to stay the night so he'll be well and sober the next day to depart. free breakfast if he's still around by then, otherwise, they take no offense.
he has no way of telling them the truth of this fragile matter. he has no way of divulging his life, which would undoubtedly ruin whatever scrapbook memory he is currently creating, and certainly no way to hold onto this awfully pleasant being who he can, apparently, trust in his total ineptitude with heavy inebriance. and he can't keep seeing them again after this. and his view on how ruthless and manipulative human beings are when faced with vulnerability has been shaken to its' core, and he can't say it, and he wants to, but...
instead he asks them to stay a little while he falls asleep (just one final, little test, he muses to himself), and they oblige. he's laid on the couch, head in their lap, his (admittedly not quite so soft after all the gel has hardened) hair being carded through by soft, ever-eager, sleepy fingers. he will never get a moment like this again and he pushes himself to take it in, revel in every second that passes, commit to absolute memory (no matter what he had earlier in the day) every detail of this sightly, sweetly saint's face.
he ends up falling asleep feeling cherished. he will remember this day forever. years to come he will still have tabs on this person, and their life will still be unexpectedly, oddly lucky.
maybe one day he'll find it in him to thank them properly, face-to-face...
nshtn can i say i love you? because i love you and every time you come in my inbox i get so excited
first and foremost i don't think he even would dance at a party. he very much is the kind of guy to find a spot and linger there with a group he's only half listening to. once he meets you though his night gets much much more interesting
he's never really had chances to drink, except maybe whiskey or something expensive with Spencer during their talks about Umbrella and the future, so when you start handing him all kinds of seltzers and mixed drinks and straight shots of vodka, he is very overwhelmed
he can't show it though! so he dutifully takes most of what you hand him, a few drinks are two sweet for him, and he is very quickly wasted tbh. you're so nice though, and you drag him in the middle of everyone dancing and show him a few easy things and soon enough he's bouncing around with everyone else
every time he starts to think about what's going to happen tomorrow you're immediately there to distract him. it's almost like you can read his mind - you know just the right things to say and how to push people out of the way and he just thinks you're perfect under the flashing lights
finally when it's time to go home, he knows for a fact he can't show up at his place looking messed up as he is - what if Spencer or Birkin or some nameless Umbrella employee saw him and ratted him out? so he takes your offer to go to your house gracefully as he can this drunk
he knows now that you're a party expert, you immediately make him drink water and wash his face and take preemptive tylenol for the hangover. your fleeting kiss and warm hands on his sweaty skin are so sweet he can't bear to think about it longer than he has to. he knows he should leave before you wake up tomorrow and forget this wonderful night ever happened (he'll never forget you, not even on his deathbed)
you give him every courtesy and kindness you can offer and he decides to take just one more, one last sweet touch to take with him into the night. you smile sleepily and open your arms for him to fall into - the blanket covering his shoulders is a little too hot and you both smell like beer and liquor and sweat but your lap is so soft, it makes the ache in his back and shoulders from carrying the world lessen a bit, and your fingers in his hair send him into a beautiful and silent sleep
the next morning it physically pains him to untangle from your body on the couch. he stands and watches you for a moment, his heart clenching and pounding in his chest, until he forces himself out the door before you can feel his absence.
when he meets you again, what feels like a thousand years later, his heart pounds just the same. you recognize him, his twisted dark smirk and deep eyes, and when you smile and say his name he's suddenly twenty-something all over again and dizzy and drunk in your arms - he never wants to leave you again
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angy-grrr · 2 days
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The good old conflict continues over Twitter. According to dudebros, apparently, we are the problem for Hori not making IzuOcha canon. But at the same time, IzuOcha is already canon in an 'implied' sense in the narrative, and that we are delusional for ''denying their canon romance''.
Some people are even trying to argue that Bakugo and Izuku don't have that much of a special bond or relationship. I mean... really? So we just gonna ignore the literal core part of the story, then?
They constantly like to bring the moments like the recent roof scene and how 'Ochako saved Deku when Deku lost control of the black whip'. Let's just ignore that Izuku lost control because someone insulted Bakugo and that Ochako couldn't stop Izuku, she had to get him be 'brainwashed'.
If the roof scene was The Moment, then they would have gone canon right and there, yet they didn't. Oh.... But, yeah, sorry. It's actually our fault that Hori didn't make the straight ship canon in his shounen manga.
When will they stop acting like the straights are oppressed?
BNHA 430 SPOILERS
it’s quite common for manga shonen series to canonize their het ships by showing something romantic without letting us know how they confessed, at least in the original work; they are often already married in a time skip, or they are shown together in the future while at least one of them (usually the woman) blushing, and this is bc of Japanese typical narration - its not driven by the need of a closed conclusion, usually it’s even better the more often it gets.
I recommend checking on kishotenketsu for more on this!
but anyways, the thing with ochako and Izuku is they don’t have any implied romantic moment which lets the intended audience to understand they are in a relationship -the only scene they have together alone in the time skip is with a small panel, which could be valid, but the snow doesn’t imply it’s Christmas (a romantic holiday) as they are wearing their uniforms and probably are still on campus and neither is even blushing or shown being typical teenagers in love, even tho is clear Izuku is still quite like “a boy at heart”, wanting to be called cool by his teacher at 25 (I don’t believe in the perspective many have of him getting all confident about romance and having a flirty attitude towards Ochako or anyone; there’s nothing implying he became that way). Even Ochako doesn’t have her usual blush!
Bc Mr. Compress is under it reading Spinner’s book, along with the melancholy of the winter with the harsher conditions but beautiful landscapes, it creates a bittersweet image in Japanese culture, as far as I know in my research. It’s not “the villains died but hey, the heteros are dating!”, but more about “Tenko and Himiko died, and there’s this memory about them that will always live. Wonder and snow is a time for reflection, with the possibility of a bright future, so Ochako and Izuku, while failing, still have hope to save complete strangers and inspire others to do the same”.
I think is more about them and the villains, everyone becoming heroes on their own by helping others no matter their “oficial status”. the funniest part? It could be more romantic and imply they are together quite easy if only Horikoshi decided to actually make them a duo and be basically destined to be together helping others if he didn’t choose Katsuki to fulfill that role. He could have just highlighted her with the suit thing, extend her hand, smile at him telling him to do his best, etc. But nah, let’s just have Katsuki tell him to come with him as a hero and imply they hold hands or extend their hands to the other even if they aren’t in need of saving.
Yeah, that’s bc he’s scared of shippers. Sure sure, whatever helps them sleep at night yk?
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druckkugelschreiber · 15 hours
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Seeing some odd posts about people complaining that Veilguard is still just about Solas which a) did you forget the original title for the game was 'Dreadwolf'? and b) don't judge a game before we have played it completly.
Like I totally get what some of them are saying. Overarching themes and conflict apparently not being as interesting when it's punching gods, like for real? I think we're playing two different game series. Which is fine, because for me DA2 was also just about some guy, but okay.
Also Dragon Age has always been bad at carrying our decisions over into other games. Atrocious even. Elves supposed to get the Hinterlands after DAO and such, just saying.
I think it's quite frankly stupid to complain about a game before having played it completly, because we don't ultimately know what exactly is going to happen and what twists or stuff there may be even with all the 'spoilers' and marketing currently getting thrown our way.
That it's going to be Solas centric has been widely teased IMO since Trespasser so I don't get the complaints now. Just wait until we have played and then complain.
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explodingchantry · 20 hours
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OK I found the source and, genuinely, what the fuck?
Varric is apparently an important character within veilguard but we don't get to express whether the inquisitor left his best friend to die in the fade?
The wardens are a big part of veilguard but we don't get to express what the inquisitor did with the southern wardens?
MORRIGAN is apparently an important character in veilguard and we don't get to express whether 1. We had her have Kieran and 2. If she drank from the well or not?? You know this important decision that was meant to impact the rest of the drinker's life, and was meant even more vital when inquisition revealed Flemerh was Mythal? I literally just replayed that quest and they genuinely make a huge point out of this decision being life altering. But it's not, is it, if both characters who could've drank show up in the next game but the effects of the well aren't present.
"northern thedas is a blank slate" is such a weird take. What happens in ferelden and orlais (and the free marchés if we bring da2 into it too) absolutely matters to the rest of thedas. These things ricochet upwards. You literally choose who leads orlais, one of (if not The) most powerful and influencial nations in all of thedas. You get to choose the fucking DIVINE. Yeah sure that might not matter in Tevinter, but it matters everywhere else?? The rest of northern thedas follows the chantry even if they might not be as horny for it as the south????
And that's only speaking of inquisition choices. I already made a post somewhere about how very few of the decision input on the keep mattered in dai and how filling the keep often felt pretty pointless because of that. But at least the gender of the hof and who they romanced came up, and the leader of ferelden came up however briefly and flawed.
Honestly dragon age was never actually good at bringing up and taking into account old choices. Da2 had a good excuse for it (set in a completely different country whilst the choices the hof made were central to ferelden only, and hawke being just Some Guy who wouldn't get involved in a lot of influencial stuff the hof had a hand in. And even THEN there's plenty of background dialogue about ferelden that does mention it.) Dai does have a lot of nods to a few things; the ruler of ferelden shows up in in hushed whispers, or if you kept Alistair/recruited loghain they show up for here lies the abyss and might even have a discussion with Morrigan with whom they had a CHILD with. If hof romanced leliana she mentions them quite a bit. Morrigan can show up with the full ass child she can have in Dao and that's probably one of the biggest differences the choices you made make. Some other decisions from Dao are referenced; like who rules Orzammar. And as for da2 it's very true that a lot of the decisions made are much harder to reference due to being more interpersonal, so it does make sense to an extent that the decisions are referenced there through simple dialogue (though that dialogue is flawed as hell.) If it doesn't like some of your past choices it'll retcon it, like if you killed leliana in Dao. Or like, for example, just a random example, you got one of the Dao endings where Cullen goes mad, kills mages and runs away. Never mentioned again that one. Weird.
Bioware loves to give you big influencial choices to make you feel important only to turn around the next game and kind of shrug their shoulders as they do the bare minimum with them. And now, don't get me wrong - some of these choices are really hard to integrate. We basically can never go back to Orzammar because its king changes everything. It's too much to take into account and would change what quests and storylines the player experiences.
But then don't fucking write it that way to begin with lol. At least with Dao you can give the benefit of the doubt with things being meant to be part of a single story - but by da2 they knew dragon age was a franchise and inquisition was written and made with the knowledge there would be another game afterwards. They could actually plan things out and figure out if maybe a choice you could make would require too many resources to implement in the next game, and thus just not actually give you the choice in inquisition. Because the divine, for example, makes a HUGE difference. I fully get that it would be extremely difficult to take all three choices into account - reference them but make them not so integral that the story of the game can only happen if one of those was made.
But then don't make us fucking able to choose who the divine is. I'd rather not have as many influencial choices in a game, but have them referenced and have them matter, than... This.
Who you romance. Whether you disbanded the inquisition. And what you think of Solas. Nothing from Dao, nothing from da2, and only this from dai. That's a fucking joke. It's a joke. A spit in the face.
Many of the fans will have replayed the series in anticipation for veilguard, carefully crafted their choices to be their main world state. Especially with the nice little sales you've had during veilguard's promotional period. And now, only now, after they will have done all of that, you spit in their faces and say that none of what they did in the past games mattered. So why should I finish my inquisition replay? Why should I care?
Meanwhile, plenty of events from the books and comics will not only be referenced but be integral for the story. Fuck you for playing the main games, you're stupid for thinking they mattered. Obviously the static stories of our external media is more important. Totally respectful of the fanbase to do that.
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For Tech Tuesday, I colored in the sketch of my husband as Tech and his grandmother’s psycho dog.
Randomly put Crosshair's tattoo on the old girl and....it works.
Crosshair would totally be a hateful little white Texan shit hound that mauls EVERYONE, kills NONSTOP, pisses on EVERYTHING, and yet, is an absolutely loyal little asshole who lives way too long and looks so fucking SMUG in all her pictures.
"Look at me! I do nothing but hateful garbage all day long, but a rich old doctor's widow and her Golden Child Grandson love me and that's ALL THAT MATTERS!"
----
(I can't say enough about what a fucking asshole Boo the Pekingese was. Boo sucked. Boo bit toddlers, children, old people, Korean War vets, other dogs, mail carriers, construction workers, LDS missionaries, everyone that made the mistake of coming near her. I always gave the little fuck a wide berth whenever we visited.
To clarify, this dog was NEVER abused or anything. According to FIL, GMIL brought her home with her two littermates Mimi and Leela, who were lovely and playful until the day they died.
Meanwhile, Boo marched in, took one look at the massive Art Deco ranch home that was to be hers, and waltzed over to GFIL's art collection from Iran and promptly pissed on it. When GFIL ran over to yank her off, Boo promptly bit him multiple times on the hand and arm.
GFIL almost drop kicked her into oblivion right there and then. Had quite a fight with his wife, GMIL, over Boo, and shortly after, volunteered for Doctors without Borders. Using his retirement and MD to reattach limbs in post-Khmer Rouge Cambodia was preferable to sharing a home with Boo, apparently.
Don't know if that story's true or not, but the incidents are there and Husband's grandpop did serve in MSF/DWB for most of the 90's. I think it's because GFIL was a good person and wanted to spend his golden years and medical background making the world a better place, but who knows. What's a Texan story without insane exaggeration?
Meanwhile, Boo bit my husband, who was a little boy, RIGHT ON THE FACE, when they met. Husband, at only 5 years old, laughed and hugged the dog, despite bleeding from his forehead. I guess he earned Boo's respect there, because whenever Husband came by, Boo would turn from a biting, snarling lunatic to a friendly, happy pup. She'd sit in his lap and let him carry her around like a loaded rifle. I guess once she tasted his blood, but not his fear, things changed. Who knows.
Boo did not have a terrible ending. No. Boo died in her sleep, curled up on GMIL's bed in the warm Harris County sunshine, at age 21. She's now happily chilling in Satan's arms, I'm sure.)
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taddymason · 27 days
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Does Jay sometimes tell Kaida stories to help her fall asleep? Did he ever tell her the story of Jack the Rabbit that Wu Lloyd told, where the moral was never to trust a snake and Kaida then thought the book was freaking racist? xD How would Kaida react to flying on a real dragon? :D How would Jay react if he ever met Kaida's biological parents?
thanks for the asks :D
Kaida actually asked Jay to read her bedtime stories quite often under the excuse that she needed to improve her Ninjargon reading, but it was because she found it entertaining to have Jay read in such different voices and doing bad, exaggerated accents to make her laugh. Plus he often changed parts of the story and the names of the characters even when re-reading the same book.
ahsjs ah yes, definitely Jay, who probably still has prejudices against snakes just like in s1, would read that story to Kaida only for her to point out confused at the end: ... Wait, don't you have fangs and a snake hiss? (and so Jay came to the conclusion that a snake must have bitten him in those years that he doesn't remember.) I think that eventually there are snakes working in the Administration would change his view of them a bit, but I see him still having this deep-rooted distrust.
Can't say; spoilers :)
I've left everything regarding Kaida's biological parents ambiguous, except for the fact that it's obvious that they didn't care about Kaida's condition once they left her, and knowing how impulsive Jay is, he'd probably be awfully hostile towards them, and his first reaction would be to tell them to fuck off. I don't see him being able to exchange a word with them without yelling/swearing at them. ALTHOUGH on some level he would understand if Kaida wanted to confront them directly, so he'd offer her the chance to have closure with them if they ever showed up, even if he's against them seeing her again.
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mothbeasts · 14 days
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i miss posting and making and engaging with ieytd content but I will be honest sometimes it feels alienating. as a lesbian.
#bee's buzzing#ieytd#i dont know.. its probably just me being Strange. but.#the Main guy in the fandom is juniper. and he's interesting! but. i don't... think about him as often#and when i do it's never in the shipping / x reader context i see so frequently in the tags.#i dont ship him with agent phoenix because. my agent is an it/its dyke. so i dont really engage in that side of fandom#i also dont think about the handler as often because. idk i just think about the women more!#but juniper and agent phoenix and the handler are like. the only people i see talked about often#which is fine!! people like them. i also like them just. not in the same way/to the same extent.#im here for the women. but. they're not talked about often at all :[#when they are it's usually briefly in passing.#they get the worst of the mischaracterization too imo. because people just do not give them the same depth as they like to give-#- charas like john. it makes me kinda sad tbh.#and also the fandom does not. seem to make much space for f/f content.#i know like. the handful of other people who make f/f content for ieytd.#and. god. idk im still honestly a bit ticked off by one solaris post that 1) was not a good analysis i will be quite honest.#it was very surface level. like really basic info and also iirc not entirely accurate? i cannot remember anymore#but. 2). it started by saying 'nobody talks about solaris outside of fabbylaris' and that still makes my blood boil.#like. not to vaguepost but. the fabbylaris posters ARE talking about solaris outside of a shipping context. please. please#also there was a whole Thing a while back where people started being strange about non-feminine nonbinary agent phoenix.#and as a nonbinary butch-adjacent dyke. it made my skin crawl!!! im NOT feminine and idk why making agent phoenix not feminine is.#apparently Bad to a certain subset of the fandom#sorry but im a dyke and i WILL make the player insert protag a butch lesbian who doesnt use she/her.#and if you have a problem with that please think about Why people making the player insert nonbinary and androgynous/Vaguely Masc is-#- such a problem to you. and whether that is alienating to the trans people in the fandom.#okay. im normal now. goodnight.
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tecchan · 6 months
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Good evening to everyone except the person who decided to have Haru disappear from the home screen after finishing the game
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theladyyavilee · 5 months
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today for some reason I can't stop thinking about this little spec ficlet I wrote before 6x14 (about the eddie blind date arc and pepa) because if I am being honest I still really stand by that interpretation of where eddie is at feelings realization wise (and I am really proud of the door and the burning metaphors I used for it 😌 xD) and how he maybe knows he needs a little push, but not how to ask for it <3
Even just the mention of Buck in this context is cracking open a door Eddie has locked again and again and again, but it's been pushing back, a little more every day. And now the locks drop without any effort at all and oh, it is such a familiar door, though not even Eddie himself knows quite all that lies beyond it. The closest he gets is just sometimes late at night, when he lets his fingertips brush against it, let's himself get burnt on purpose and for just a second there is the exhilarating flash of what if? But more than that? Even the thought sends his heart racing, makes his chest go tight. And well, he’s still able to push the door back closed again.
and
And maybe he also hates her for it, just a little bit. Because maybe sometimes he could have used a little more of a push, maybe there are some lessons he wouldn’t have had to learn the hardest way if someone had pushed him into confronting them sooner. Somehow it pulls his thoughts to Buck. Buck who also worries, but is never quiet about it, who pushes back and prods and tugs at everything until Eddie unravels, without ever stepping over the line, without ever losing that gentleness that is so inherently him. Buck – who doesn't do well with being prodded himself, who needs time to figure himself out first and be left to come back on his own time – somehow has never had a problem figuring out that maybe there are times when Eddie does need to be pushed. Because sometimes it’s easier to give in to being pushed, than to have to scrape together the courage to start moving in that direction yourself. Sometimes it's easier to let someone else take that first step and to follow them—to let them take control. (But then maybe it’s only this easy when it's someone he trusts. When it’s Buck.)
and
He doesn’t have the words for it—doesn’t even quite know what it really all entails, because the topic feels like a hot iron inside his own head. One that he keeps on shifting from hand to hand and back again, without ever looking at it too closely, and still burns his fingers on. It’s a bright and beautiful thing too, of course, and Eddie burns and burns and burns his fingers against it willingly, but he never quite looks at it head on—because that would be a decision in itself and he can't. Because he doesn't know if it'll burn him to the ground or let him bask in warmth and light for the rest of his life – and maybe both options are equally terrifying in their own rights. But he won’t know which it is until he looks. The only thing he knows for sure? Once Eddie is on fire, it will also consume Buck, no matter which way it ends up tipping. And even less than having the words, does he have the bravery for that decision and—god—that is a thought that tastes bitter like shame at the back of his throat.
and
And he knows that Pepa won’t give him that push that he needs—the push he maybe is already ready for but not ready to ask for. And the one person who could give it? For once—by Eddie’s careful design—actually doesn’t have a clue that Eddie needs that push.
schrödinger's feelings my beloved <3
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professionalowl · 8 months
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not reblogging the post because i know it's a flawed test (and infuriatingly poorly worded to wit) but the RAADS-R autism test is going around again and i got an 87, which is i think what i got the last time i took it and also tracks - i'm personally pretty certain that i'm not autistic, but (autistic) friends of mine have historically been split on the issue because apparently i 'act' like an autistic person and they're often surprised when i say i'm actually not
#my *closest* friends tend to think i'm not but - to quote one guy - '[i'm] very smart and smart ppl tend to have traits that overlap'#which is an interesting assessment (he's autistic tb clear) and i think i know where it's coming from#i'm very direct with comments; i often have trouble with empathy; i'm clever (or y'know 'clever' for a given value of the word);#i don't feel emotions particularly strongly - or immediately - and this comes across in my speech#which i've been told can come off as detached/disaffected/uncaring even when it's not trying to be;#i'm apparently quite difficult to read sometimes? or come off as intimidating per neutral expression;#uh. one time an english teacher told me that i'd taught her to 'think more logically' whatever the fuck that means;#these are i think stereotypical autistic 'smart guy' traits which do not actually map on to the majority of autistic people afaik#at least not as a package or all expressed the same way - but in this case i think it's a category error#interesting food for thought nonetheless. i spend some time thinking about it because people do ask me occasionally#and the general autistic mileu of tumblr.com has actually helped me be nicer to myself about those traits#(as well as check myself abt other people; i'm not going to pretend to be some kind of saintly autistic whisperer or w/e)#considered going back and taking the test with the 'most generous' and then the 'least generous' answers and comparing them#but i can't be bothered. add a button for 'in specific situations' or die by my hand#i WILL say that some of said autistic friends who were surprised to find out i wasn't#expressly thought i WAS because they drew a correlation between their behaviour and my own#so it's not just 'people are misreading me because of stereotypes about how autistic people act' although i do think that can be an element#let me know if this post is weird or w/e it is literally just speculating on myself and how people perceive me#as a consequence of tending to occupy circles otherwise occupied largely by neurodivergent people#('fandom' and 'archaeology and anthropology')
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andromeda3116 · 1 year
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dealing with the insurance company and then the clinic itself via a "health advocate" who agrees that this looks shady and she's not seeing the same thing on her end that i'm seeing on the bill is just. exactly what i wanted to spend my work break doing. fantastic. fun times.
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What are good stories for the new gods. And sorry for my last and my mind just thinks stuff randomly sometimes sorry
Don't worry at all, always happy to give comic recs! Sorry for the late reply, I wanted to read the Forever People miniseries I hadn’t read yet to see if they were worth recommending. They were not.
Please keep in mind that this is not a reading list, but rather a rec list of New Gods comics I’d consider good. Unfortunately that’s mostly Mister Miracle. Please pour one out for the Forever People and their complete lack of good comics aside from their debut.
Of course, the original fourth world trilogy — The New Gods (1971), The Forever People (1971), and Mister Miracle (1971) — forms your base and is required reading. (Kirby's run on Mister Miracle ends after #18, and that's when you should stop reading because Englehart's Mister Miracle sucks.)
Others are:
The Hunger Dogs, a graphic novel continuation of the New Gods by Jack Kirby. Kirby was forced to cancel the comic prematurely and this wraps up some (though sadly not all) loose ends, although likely not in the way that was originally intended. Better ending than the original, imo, though far from perfect.
Orion, the only Orion solo run to date and one of my favourite comics of all time. Truly can't overstate how good this one is.
Justice League of America #183-185 isn't solely about the New Gods but I really like Scott and Barda in it. Pre-crisis.
Mister Miracle Special, a oneshot that was intended to re-establish the Mister Miracle canon post-crisis, but really ended up just being a stand-alone story. My favourite Scott outside of the original series.
Mister Miracle (1989) is Scott's second and longest running solo. I have my issues with it, but it's still very much worth reading.
Mister Miracle and the Source of Freedom is a post-flashpoint Shilo Norman miniseries. Again, I have my issues with it, primarily my hatred of N'vir Free as a character concept, but it's a very interesting take on Shilo and has by far my favourite Thaddeus Brown and Oberon.
Also, I’ll rec the Jack Kirby 100th Celebration Collection, which is exactly what it sounds like. As in all collections, the writing varies between stories, and I recommend some but not others, so here’s a quick overview of the New Gods-centric stories in it:
The first one, about Shilo Norman and the Black Racer (unsure of the name), I really can’t recommend because I absolutely loathe its take on the Black Racer. While it keeps to the letter of the canon established by Kirby, I do not feel like it keeps to the spirit. The little ‘Soul of Willie Walker’ blurb by Mark Evanier that precedes it is interesting, though.
The second story, The Resistance!, I very much do recommend! I really adore this story, focusing on resistance efforts on Apokolips, because I feel like it’s one of the few post-Kirby stories that actually does a good job engaging with the fascism Darkseid and Apokolips represent. This story is essentially a better version of the one from the New Gods Secret Files, which I don’t necessarily recommend because it’s far too sloppy to actually be good, but it’s not bad either, so you know, it gets a mention. 
The third New Gods story, focusing on Orion (I also don’t know this one’s name), is like, fine? It does that thing where they make specifically Orion xenophobic towards the Bugs, rather than the entirety of New Genesis, which I strongly dislike, but aside from that its characterization is decent and it focuses on Kalibak and Orion, so if you like that dynamic this might appeal to you more than me.
The fourth New Gods story, Teeth of the See: A Tale of Young Orion, I do recommend. It’s short and quickly read, but it’s a fun look at an adventure from a younger, less experienced Orion.
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eviltothecore13 · 1 year
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lots of people in this fandom CLAIM to love Gomez but when someone makes a post with Morticia as "Barbie is everything" and Gomez as "he's just Ken", it gets likes and reblogs
like...isn't that meme essentially saying "he's bland and boring/doesn't do anything interesting/is no good at anything and has nothing special about him, and no-one cares about him that much because he's just some bland generic guy with no personality beyond being a sidekick"?
do the majority of fans genuinely believe Gomez has no personality and no interesting traits?
#I really am starting to consider deleting all my fics and my Tumblr#because most of my planned WIPs focus on Gomez quite heavily#and I feel like no-one will care or want to read them because apparently everyone thinks he is dull and bland#I'm also assuming everyone I've ever talked to about him was secretly#thinking 'I wish this loser would stop going on about this boring character who no-one cares about'#'ugh they're pathetic he's the most generic bland guy on the planet why would anyone be a fan of him'#even if at the time people seemed interested I'm starting to think they must just have been pretending#because APPARENTLY the whole fandom thinks he's boring and useless and bland and stupid and has no personality#if I post any of my fics I'm worried I'll either get zero response because no-one likes or cares about Gomez#or I'll just get comments from people going 'give up and quit writing no-one cares about this stupid character he sucks and so do you'#I don't get why he's apparently seen as dull and boring when he swordfights and builds robots and blows things up but apparently he is?#I especially don't get it from Morticia fans tbh#because I don't think SHE'D actually like people calling Gomez dull and bland and forgettable and useless#she generally seems to believe he's amazing just as much as he believes she's amazing#but hey what do I know I'm clearly the only person in the fandom who finds him interesting#or thinks he has a personality or is anything more than Morticia's forgettable stupid sidekick#so I guess I'm just stupid and wrong about everything#and should stop writing fic because apparently I'm too stupid to understand the characters properly#and I'm just an idiot with bad taste and bad opinions#because if I was a true fan who understood the characters I'd think Gomez was boring and useless too like everyone else does#it's just not fun to know that everyone I thought was interested in my fics and headcanons was only pretending to be
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tardis--dreams · 2 years
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One thing you need to know about me is that I will never reblog anything that has the addition "this should be reblogged by everyone" or anything of the like.
#unless it's like#really funny and not a guilt trippy kind of bullshit#i can agree 130% with a post and then see that comment and I'm like#yeah no. go fuck yourself.#(this point has been made so many times but people don't get why it's annoying apparently. people don't dislike your stupid addition#because they secretly disagree with the post but because now it seems like some weird social obligation to rb is#rb this or you're a bad person is a clever marketing strategy but it's quite stupid because it weakens the original point#oh you're saying everyone should rb this? well now it looks like the ppl rbing actually just do it out of some feeling#of social obligation. not because they really want to but because they want to fulfill the arbitrary standards you just made up for being#a good person#and don't get me wrong most certainly are most people rb these posts still out of agreement with the original statement#but it's still annoying as fuck and also you'd think ppl would know by now that people don't generally like being told what to do#so my hypothesis is (and i won't do any research to prove or disprove it (i might be very wrong and most people don't mind obviously)) bjt#but my hypothesis is that people who originally agree with the post but have a strong desire of being free in their choices#won't actually end up rbing bc it's just not that free of a choice anymore bc you just had to make it 'obligatory' but we all know#nothing is obligatory on a stupid webbed site like this so they scroll past while people who maybe would have scrolled past now feel#like they might actually be a bad person if they don't do as it says but without actually caring about the content. which diminishes#the positivity the post originally was supposed to spread bc how do you tell ppl actually mean it now when they rb these things#anyway. am i ranting about something completely asinine phenomenon on tumblr.com? yes.#would it be better to not dedicate my time and energy into making a 'hate' post? absolutely. but that will never stop me from doing so#(also works for things like 'you guys HAVE to do xyz [for your (mental) health/etc]'. literally the best advice phrased like this#is counterproductive. post something that doesn't sound like you're judging everyone who does otherwise and maybe ppl will be more inclined#to believe whatever your point or statement is)#ok I'll stop#shut up amy#void screams
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