#because it gave some illusion of them being able to make their own choices and decisions in what they wanted

[rxttenfish]

Asking because I’m extremely curious about this, how did MonProm’s writing get different over time? I remember you saying that the lore and characters feel different, and that it's missing sincere character interactions, too. I know almost nothing about the lore and I’ve only seen a few people mention the characters, so I’d be interested in a rundown of what aspects you think got worse in the series

I wouldn’t mind a very long response since I’m not that active in the fandom, I need to catch up on what happened

sorry for taking so long to answer this! i kinda waffled on it for a long bit, mainly because i started doubting myself again, and whether or not this was me simply overreacting or being tinted by nostalgia or simply being extremely picky and choosy in what i like (the last of which is true, i seldom get into fandoms at all for this reason and stay away from most popular media, but i wasn't sure if it applied here). i've posted about it already, but i'm in the middle of a psychotic episode where i can't feel a lot of pleasure to begin with + most things i do experience ending up solidly in the "very bad" category, so as you can imagine, i really didn't want to mislead and check that i was actually in objective reality.

as it is, this is also when a lot more screenshots started to be posted in the monster prom tag, and that helped me bridge the gap back into returning to the games themselves and feel like i was making a more accurate judgement. if you're one of those people who have been posting screenshots, i sincerely thank you, and i appreciated seeing you in the tag greatly.

for those not in the know — i've been in the monster prom fandom since it first released, prior to even the first additional ending to be added (the "Punch the sun" ending, and i recall the minor fandom drama that happened at that time due to it). my impression of monster prom is very much influenced by this, as what got me into the first game was the fact that the characters genuinely seemed to care for each other and were friends with each other (not merely tolerating each other's presences nor dressing it up, they sincerely thought of each other as friends and were open about that fact), on top of the wide variety of small details and statements that, if taken at face value, could create compounding complexity in the lives of each and every character and had wider implications for their lives.

no, they were not necessarily explored nor even necessarily "real", with so many conflicting events and statements, but i liked this too, because it meant a wider flexibility in what you could imagine, helping to create a more tailored experience for everyone who thought about these characters. this was what i liked about the early fandom too. what was baseline "canon" was so vague and minimal that you could have wildly different interpretations of the same characters' histories and relationships with each other. you would have radically different perspectives on what the world itself looked like, what it was like, that there wasn't really any wrong answers so long as their personalities remained the same. this is where you got the old headcanon of polly and liam being childhood friends who knew each other as humans, or that the world of monster prom was post-apocalypse where humanity itself had gone extinct or only existed in tiny pockets, or my personal headcanon that both monster and human society existed right next to each other and had minimal crossover for petty cultural reasons. this was also prior zoe-as-ro, and there were wildly different interpretations of zoe's personality, with most going for a far more disquieting creepy-cute than the deep nerd we got.

this is why you get stuff like the timeloop theory, where everyone is repeating the same weeks leading up to prom over and over, and are perhaps vaguely aware of it but broadly unconcerned. this is also why it felt like the joke that, the characters were still in high school but were all fully legal adults with most in their 20's, best landed, because it was absurd and strange and didn't quite make sense, but the world itself was inherently absurd and semi-malleable to begin with. realistically, i felt like everyone understood it was making fun of the trope of having adults play teenagers in american sitcoms and wildly casting outside the age range, but for more in-universe explanations it wasn't any different from the way that you would have a large, dramatic ending in which everything changed, but then you'd restart and everyone would be right back at the beginning with nothing different, or even having conflicting events in the same run. it was a dream-logic that fit with the tropes and, thus, diagetically made sense.

to be clear, i don't mind canon having a set, well, canon on which it refers back to itself. i don't mind expanding that or including more things which are set in stone. but there was a perceivable shift in how the games handled this over time, becoming a lot more... bitter, it felt, towards all of these different branching ideas and concepts that, yeah, the people making them knew wouldn't necessarily be "canon" because "canon" already liked to contradict itself so much. most people weren't even sold on any one idea, and there was a much greater sense of enjoying and appreciating all the varying ideas people would come up with even if you personally didn't share them. making the characters be out of character was the real crime, because then it didn't diagetically make sense in the same way, didn't wholly fit.

(again, this is not to say fanon didn't happen and characters weren't smoothed down into a simplified personality that fit these varying fan-interpretations instead of the game itself. certainly damien love/lust was just as bad as it had ever been, and everyone loved to mangle his character into a more stereotypical "bad boy with a heart of hold" all the time. but it certainly felt less set-in-stone about it than it does now, with any deviation from the norm being considered strange and odd and even broadly shunned from the wider fandom.)

all of this is setup for establishing what the writing, lore, and characters felt like in the earlier days. the characters were the strongest part, with their relationships to each other being equally as important. the lore played it fast and loose and was far less interested in setting anything in concrete because that wasn't the important part. the lore wasn't the important part, which was what made it all the more intoxicating to think about, all the more fun to play with.

montrip is easily the biggest offender when it comes to setting everything in all-or-nothing terms and demanding absolutism from the world. broadly i blame the hitchhiker conversations for the worst of it, but i think ultimately the way they handled the entire premise of the game is where this problem stems from. it's not really an exploration in the same sense that you might explore the first game, discovering different perspectives and different people with different relationships to each other. it's an exploration in the sense of a sequel that over-explains the monster, that takes the most boring option out of all those that were possible and floating around and settles on something that was blatant, obvious, typically rejected not because of how novel it is but how trite and par for the course it is in the rest of the genre.

yeah, okay. humans know nothing about monsters and there's a "monster dimension" that exists separately from the human dimension. there's no crossover between the two of them. of course there's a big grand-scale fight between the eldritch powers that zoe used to be a part of, from which not only are slayers the main organization against them, but also the merkingdom has some horse in this race too. it's an urge to make things so universal in explaining them, in revealing connecting threads which unite everything that's ever happened in here, that makes the worldbuilding and lore immediately much more boring than it ever was before.

and it didn't have to be this way! nothing in the first game contradicts any of this too explicitly (see the above, the first game loves to contradict itself), and i would even be happy if this was basically canon but never stated or confirmed to be the big overarching everything going on underneath it all. i believe you should probably know these things about any world that you create and have them in the back of your mind. the difference is that you can know these things and keep them in mind, even focusing on things where its very relevant, and still not reveal them. this is why you have lore bibles, after all. every horror writer knows exactly how their monster works and the full underlying reason for everything that happens, but that doesn't mean the audience will see it or possess this same information too, and leaving it intentionally obscure will make far better stories.

which, this is bad enough, but it wouldn't be the breaking point for me if this was all there was.

but the worst thing of all has to be the slow decay of the very same characters that sold me on this world, this lore, this game in the first place. monster prom is nothing without the characters in it. it's a dating sim, it has nothing but characters to get you to play, and liking these characters are the entire reason anyone would pick up monster prom in the first place.

and the first game pulls this off extremely well. it's all in the tagline: be your worst self. they are, indeed, all terrible people. yes, even that character that you just thought of right now. they all have points in the game where they commit atrocities, where they kill or hurt people, where they do inexcusable things that could not be ignored in a more serious setting.

but that's the point. i think there's something very powerful in creating a character who not only do you love and love their personality and the way they interact with the world, but who also are inapologetically terrible, and to have the humor and the charisma be so good that you don't get bogged down in the "this is awful". likewise, it never feels the urge to really go out of its way to justify what's going on. this is not to say theres no discussion of if someone "deserved it", but usually there's still the sense that the joke is on them, that this is still an extreme reaction specifically for comedy and not necessarily something that can be justified. you can have damien set leonard on fire and have it feel earned, without prompting the needed reaction of what it's actually like to watch someone burn to death.

this is what sets the prank masterz ending apart from the rest of the game, and really establishes it as the first real "bad ending". because nothing that you do or happens in the prank masterz ending is any different from anything else that happens in any other run. you summon evil beings from other dimensions as a throwaway gag on how visiting one location raises your stats. you kill other people and damn them to terrible fates. you watch as body horror happens. the only difference is that, in the prank masterz ending, the laugh track doesn't play.

the rest of the game and the writing echoes this philosophy, this careful interplay of tropes that keeps everything tongue in cheek and yet sincere enough to make sure emotional beats still land when they're needed. the characters feel true to themselves and their own emotions, even when the world is extreme and excessive, when everything else runs on comedy logic.

this is also what i noticed failing first as time went on.

like i said, fanon has always existed and there's always been very specific ideas as to what characters are like in the same way fanon always flattens down characters into the same tropes over and over. scott is stupid and innocent and doesn't know what sex is. damien is violent and hot and too cool for anyone else. miranda is the idiot girl character. repeat over and over and over until you get sick of it.

but it's been an issue as time has crept on that canon has started to approach fanon and began to merge with it. now, scott is so innocent that he can't even curse. polly starts being mean to her friends and saying things that would be very hurtful to hear. the merkingdom isn't really super evil and fucked up, it's just miranda that's like that. they become simpler, easier to digest, streamlined for social media posts and mass-sharing. they become less and less subversions of existing tropes and moreso just another example of them, something else to add to the collection, not their own individual stories.

even further from this, what more complex traits they had are now stated and not shown. polly is stated to be smart and clever in a way that her party girl persona doesn't imply and to be sincerely rather down to earth with the people she cares about, but we seldom ever see this anymore unless its the game specifically trying to make a point about it, in which case it won't let her do anything that implies cleverness and moreso will just outline it in the narration. vera is stated to care for people in a very genuine and heartfelt way, but seldom will get a chance to do so, and every opportunity for her to do so to their faces is missed while she will just outright state it later. it does not feel consistent, it does not feel like any of these are intended reads of their actions. it feels like the devs have something they want to do but no idea on how to actually do so. and forget it if you want these traits to manifest in small ways that show up in unrelated moments and scenes.

the dialogue becomes harder and harder to tell between each speaker, if you are just looking at what's said and not at the pictures attached to it. the characters' distinct voices have been eroded away, so that they speak more and more like each other, relaying the same terms and ideas in the same words. perspective becomes a suggestion, instead of a must.

this is something that started back in monster camp too, as all of the endings in that game felt ultimately the same as every other ending. it's very hard to place or define the full reason why, why there feels like there's no emotional stakes nor investment, why everything feels moreso like selecting different coats of paint and trying to find all the different ending pictures rather than being interested in exploring the characters as characters.

stranger yet, the series that started with the tagline of "be your worst self" has experienced a kind of... softening, for lack of a better word? what i mentioned about being able to handle the balance between terrible people who do terrible things and the light tone of the game starts to change, as abruptly the same characters who were down with violent murder in the first game start to lose their nerve, acting more and more on more typical morality. it's one of those things that feels like it's starting to damage the tone, as abruptly it's not as absurd as it used to be, demands less suspension of disbelief which could buffer and support the rest of the setting on it. there's even a part in one of the endings in montrip which involves current-polly and current-scott looking back on their monprom selves and reacting in horror at how violent and careless their pranks are, in a way that fundamentally felt like it was undercutting and disparaging all the things that felt fun and made monprom what it was.

which is odd, really, because more and more i feel like the characters in these games like each other less and less. the friendships and genuine enjoyment of each others company that brought me to this game in the first place has gone. now they don't mention each other as much, don't care for each other's feelings and reactions as much, aren't as willing to support each other. they are more and more found on their own, relied on their own, seem to seek out contact and interaction with their own friends less and less. it feels like they're all separating out into their own worlds, but also feels like they wouldn't willingly want to interact with each other if they weren't already forced together by some other outside contrivance.

if anything, i'd compare it to every other dating sim out there, where you, the player, are the most important person in these characters' lives, and they only feel ambivalent or antagonistic towards every other character. which, again, is not why i picked up monster prom or why i liked it so much in the first place.

and it's because of this that it feels like the current state of the series has to focus on its increasingly weak worldbuilding and lore, trying to form a more serious foundation without character relationships being so tightly bound together, without the characters themselves being more developed and rich, without an aspect of absurd humor to rely on.

more and more i've noticed monprom has to rely on referencing other series to make itself funny and create humor, which, again, it's always done. it was just easier to ignore back then, if you didn't know what was being referenced, because there was always more going on in the exact same scene to bolster it and give context clues as to the setup and punchline at play. it feels like the current games are much more dependent on you knowing pop culture references in order to have any fun with it, and i'm someone who, again, is very picky in what i like or what i'll seek out. i'm not interested in a stream of references about other things that i would much rather be doing than playing through a game that feels like it hates that i like it at all, when i could, again, just be engaging with the thing that takes itself seriously and knows what it wants.

[dark-frosted-heart]

Roger Barel Main Route - Mad Love Chapter 22

As usual, can’t guarantee 100% accuracy on this. I’m doing this for archiving purposes and you can probably find a better translation out there

I walked around and browsed the shelves to distract myself.

However—Alfons’ words still continued to replay in my head.

~~ Flashback ~~

Alfons: If that man did not have very long to live, would you still choose to stay by his side?

(Roger…didn’t have long to live?)

Kate: …Please don’t make bad jokes.

Alfons: Didn’t you want to believe the good in me? Besides, you were with him for nearly a month. Surely you must have had some kind of idea?

(Ah…)

~~~~ Flashback within a flashback ~~~~

When we went undercover at that village led by the Spirit God.

When Roger synthesized a treatment for tetanus, he didn’t hesitate to take it himself to conduct a clinical trial.

He didn’t let Liam be the test subject.

~~~~ End flashback within a flashback ~~~~

Roger’s ambition was to “get rid of curses of the Cursed”.

(A person like that wouldn’t devalue his own life)

(...Unless it’s for the sake of researching how to “get rid of curses of the Cursed”?)

While reading through the various research materials so that I was ready to be Roger’s assistant, I remembered coming across the words “drug resistance”.

Kate: Could it be…because Roger’s been using himself as a test subject, he’s…

Alfons: I honestly couldn’t care less whether that man lives or dies. However, there was a night when I gave into a bit of temptation and asked for the truth—

~~~~ Flashback within a flashback ~~~~

Alfons: Are you dying?

Roger: Where’d that come from? Bit of a heavy conversation to have over drinks.

Alfons: When have we ever had a friendly, peaceful conversation?

Roger: Haha, guess you’re right. Still…How’d you know?

There wasn’t even a trace of death within that bright laugh.

Alfons: We’ve known each other for a long time. Regrettably.

Roger: …

Roger silently set his glass of beer down.

Roger: I’m dying—’Cause I’ve been repeatedly conducting experiments on myself.

Alfons: I see. Though you’re surrounded by Cursed Ones now, In the past, it wasn’t easy to find them.

Roger: Yeah. Back then, you were the only one I knew. I’m the furthest from the self-sacrificing type. I just had no choice but to borrow my own lifespan for my ambitions. That’s all.

~~~~ End flashback within a flashback ~~~~

Alfons: —As that person said, “that’s all.”

(...That’s all?)

Kate: How can he just say “that’s all”...when it’s his life he’s talking about.

Alfons: That’s all there is to it isn’t there? 

Kate: Huh…?

Alfons: We Crown are villains that exist in the dark night. We have all since given up living normal lives and being happy. We are all ready to die before our time. It is a part of our daily life.

Alfons’ eyes are as calm as a lake deep within a forest.

Alfons: Nevertheless, getting involved in something without being aware of the full extent isn’t clever, now is it?

But when he’s worried for me, his eyes wavered.

Kate: …Alfons

Alfons: That man is a terrible, egoistic scumbag who only thinks of himself. If you want to become a widow, then do as you like. At this rate, why not just stay close? While you’re in tears, I can appear before you and show you illusions of Roger.

~~ End flashback ~~

Kate: …I don’t want illusions.

The words I wasn’t able to say back then disappeared into the night air.

After some time in the forest of books, my troubled heart finally settled down.

(Just now I was too upset to think clearly, but…)

(Like Alfons said…“that’s all”)

Roger had considered whether to prioritize his ambitions or lifespan and in the end, chose his ambitions.

Besides, being a part of Crown meant that your life was always in danger and you never knew when you would lose your life.

(I’m well aware of that, but…)

I’ve been arrogant and stupid.

—That’s why it felt like Roger would always be by my side.

(Had Alfons not told me, I would never have known)

Roger and I weren’t just Fairytale Keeper and Crown anymore.

I love Roger and he…told me that he loves me too.

(I wonder…What will Roger do with our relationship)

As I pondered over it, a memory popped into my head.

(Ah…)

~~ Flashback ~~

Roger: Then I’ll give you one final trial on the robin growth map. If you can clear it, you’ll be my lover.

Kate: …Huh? One final trial? Why? You…like me, don’t you?

Roger: I do, but that’s unrelated. I’m the type to train my dogs properly. I don’t spoil them just ‘cause we’re family.

~~ End flashback ~~

(...Could it be that)

(—For my final trial, you’re going to let me go?)

(No, I can’t just say that’s what’s he’s doing…but what if—)

There was no point in guessing, but I couldn’t help but imagine the worst.

(If Roger does want to separate…perhaps it’s better to agree to it)

I’d feign ignorance, fail the final trial, and leave my position as Fairytale Keeper.

I’d leave Crown and Roger, and never see him again.

And then I’d return to my normal, peaceful life.

Kate: It will be painful at first, but…with time…I’ll get used to not having Roger.

I couldn’t help this feeling of weakness.

Ale: …Woof. Arf arf!

Kate: Huh, Ale?

Ale: Arf!

Ale suddenly broke into a run.

It was just my luck that the door wasn't closed properly so with a short paw, he pushed it open and ran out.

Kate: Where are you going, Ale? Wait…!

--

Kate: Ale, hey Ale!

Ale: Arf arf!

(...I understood)

(Whenever Ale suddenly ran off like that, it’s because—)

He wanted to tell me something.

Then—I guess it’s time to see Roger.

--

I could’ve reached out and grabbed that small body of his, but I just followed Ale.

We ran through the palace, through the dense first, through the halls of Crown Castle until—

Roger’s voice: Woah! What’s up, Ale? You’re pretty energetic today!

Ale ran into the lab and jumped on Roger.

When he saw me following after, his amber eyes grew wide.

Roger: Kate!

Seeing that wild smile made my heart pound.

That innocent, carefree, child-like smile was enough to steal my heart.

Roger: I was just thinking about calling for you.

Kate: Oh…Um

(The fact that he was waiting for me means…)

Kate: Is something the matter?

Roger: Yeah, the best thing. Take a look at this research material.

What Roger handed to me looked quite old and faded.

I took a closer look at what was written…

Kate: “Research Material on the Cursed. Researcher, Alexander Taylor” It’s Alec!

Roger: It’s definitely his handwriting and research.

Kate: But…I thought the police had confiscated all of Alec’s research…

(So why is this here?)

Roger: You know Jude’s company? Seemed like some guys from Gracefield Royal Hospital tried to get in the way. So Jude decided to go pay the Royal Hospital a little visit.

Kate: He’s as vindictive and proactive as ever…

Roger: So then he found this piece of research material in a lab.

Kate: The lab where the Privy Council and doctors were doing their research before they got poisoned… If Alec’s research was found there, then that means…!

I had my answer.

Roger’s nod confirmed my thoughts.

Roger: That’s right. Those guys combined mine and Alec’s research materials to synthesize a drug that would get rid of curses.

Kate: I thought so! Then with this research material,

Roger: We can make an antidote.

Kate: What a relief. We did it, Roger.

Roger beamed at me and when he pulled me into a hug, I was overwhelmed with joy.

Roger: …Thanks for being here with me for this, Kate.

Return his hug +4 +4

Spontaneous kiss

Pull away in embarrassment

Heart filled with joy, I returned Roger’s hug.

I squeezed him tight. Roger then picked me up and spun me around.

Roger: Haha, we did it Kate!

(...I can hear Roger’s heart beating when I’m in his arms)

It was too precious to stand.

(Ah…I’ve been an idiot)

(Why did I even think I could leave him for even a moment?)

(My heart’s already been stolen and dyed)

We’re adults…so it wasn’t like we couldn’t live without the other.

No matter how much it hurt, how painful it was, how long is spent wandering around in nothingness.

This was my egoism.

(I want to be with Roger)

(Until the moment his heart stops beating)

It appeared that spending time with Roger had turned me into an egoist.

(...But before I can do that, there are some things I need to do first)

You can’t get what you want by just staring wistfully.

Kate: Roger. After finishing the antidote and you’ve condemned them… I have something I need to talk to you about.

Amber eyes watched me intently…before they softened with understanding.

—That night, we finished making the antidote.

From then on began the endless series of condemnation of evil. 

--

Privy Council Lord: …Haaa…Urk…Why are you here? 

Royal Hospital doctor: …Ugh. They’re here to mock us…

The Privy Council and doctors that Victor and William had locked up were still in their cells.

They had all been poisoned, their central nervous system damaged. They groaned and breathed heavily like beasts.

While looking down at them crawling on the cold floor, Roger and I unlocked their cell and entered.

Roger: Oh, that’s harsh. We even lost sleep and skipped meals to make an antidote.

Privy Council Lord: …An antidote?

Kate: The test tubes in this medicine box contain an antidote that Roger made. The efficacy has already been tested. You’ll feel relief within 30 minutes of taking it.

At that moment, the color of their eyes changed. And not just in a figurative sense either.

Royal Hospital doctor: …Haaa….With this…I’m saved.

Royal Hospital doctor: We were forced to do this research because these people ordered us to!

Royal Hospital doctor: Give us innocent doctors the antidote.

They crawled toward us, ignoring the pain from their broken nails as they clawed at the stone floor.

Choked groans and shining eyes…

Them desperately grabbing at Roger’s legs was a strange sight to see.

Roger: …Innocent?

Royal Hospital doctor: We may have done a lot of bad. But it was all for the sake of our country!

Royal Hospital doctor: With our numerous experiments, we doctors will advance medicine in Britain. It will certainly make our country prosper. You’re a doctor too, aren’t you? Surely you understand our feelings.

They try to butter him up, only for their own sakes.

With their lives in his hands, Roger—

Roger: Yeah, I get it.

With eyes full of pity…

Roger: —I get that you’re all a bunch of damn hypocrites.

[fists-on-up]

My Thoughts on the Loie Fuller + Taylor Swift Connection (Part 1)

INTRO

I tend to keep most of my posts on Twitter or TikTok somewhat neutral and objective because neither are good platforms for nuanced conversations. I cannot fully explain why I have a certain opinion on either platform and it is extremely frustrating for me to try, so I just avoid it.

I also don't like the potential for the general public to happen upon a gaylor-centric post of mine if that post is more nebulous vs fact and evidence based. They simply will not have the foundational knowledge to be able to digest it, and nothing good can come from that.

I've been mulling over the topic of this post for months, but I don't think I can do it justice on any other platform, and I certainly can't discuss it without mentioning Karlie, who people have lost their goddamn minds about, so here we are.

THE EXCERPT

In a 2019 Vogue interview - in fact, the infamous "community I'm not a part of" interview - there was a brief discussion of Taylor's dedication of the song Dress to Loie Fuller during the Reputation Tour. It stuck with me for a few reasons:

The author considers Loie to be "the most illuminating clue for reading both Lover & Reputation".

The author glosses over Fuller's interest in artists owning their work, focusing instead on the center of what her work actually meant.

The author's mention of the Cocteau & Mallarme quotes.

Specific mention of the Serpentine Dance & Butterfly Dance.

I also believe Loie is a fundamental part of understanding Reputation & Lover, but moreover I think she's fundamental to understanding Taylor's approach and perspective regarding her own public image during this time.

Mentioning that Loie created "the phantom of an era" is an interesting choice. It struck me because of Taylor's suggestion that she could be a phantom - something that exists in appearance only - in ...Ready For It?, along with the choice to include a fallen chandelier in the music video for Look What You Made Me Do. The chandelier crash is an iconic moment in Phantom of the Opera and symbolizes a vow of revenge. A vendetta, if you will (and I will).

A DIZZINESS OF SOUL MADE VISIBLE BY AN ARTIFICE

But the thing that's brought me back to this excerpt again and again is the Mallarme quote describing Loie's performances as "a dizziness of soul made visible by an artifice".

Sometimes I will read, write, or think a phrase or sentence that just... sticks. It burrows down into my brain and roots itself there. Sometimes it's a line that's just perfectly crafted and I need to admire it over & over. Sometimes it makes me think. It's usually both. As a writer, these are the lines I live and breathe for. They're the lines I'm trying to build and when I hit them, there's no other feeling like it.

This line stuck with me, and I think it's possible that it stuck with Taylor too.

A dizziness of soul made visible by an artifice.

A truth displayed for all to see, hidden by falsehoods, but only visible because of those falsehoods.

Loie Fuller was on stage, but her genius was in her use of movement, fabric, and lighting to ensure the audience could only see glimpses of her. Her dances gave the illusion that she was not a woman, but a snake. A butterfly. Not an out lesbian, a desexualized human being hidden at the center. There, but not there. Visible, but only as something else. Hidden in plain sight.

DRESS

How fitting, then, that Taylor chose to dedicate Dress to Loie Fuller each night? A song that embodies the description of "a dizziness of soul made visible by an artifice". The song itself is an artifice. A love song that is very obviously about Karlie, but that the general public 100% contends is about Joe. She could write a song about her best friend during a time at which the entire world knew who her best friend was, then sing that song to that best friend live, and only a few would even hear her. All you need is some fabric, some lighting, a red herring about a buzzcut, and you're invisible. We see the soul, they see the artifice. We see the woman, they see the serpent.

Dress even tells the story of embodying this line in real life, does it not? It's the story of pretending to be one thing in public so that the public does not realize you're another. The story of an electrifying, maddening, all-encompassing love that's out there in front of the entire world, masquerading as something else. Hidden as "best friends". Holding hands, being one another's date to events, being so obviously in love in public, on video, in pictures, and yet ignored because the public believes the artifice. And that artifice is the only reason they were able to love one another in public at all. It was a beautiful love made visible by, ironically, the complete, unquestioning dedication to heteronormativity most of the public cleaves to. Made visible by the inherent invisibility of sapphic love. We saw a great love, they saw "best friends". We saw the soul, they saw the artifice.

We see the queer genius at the center, they see the paper-thin public image they want to believe. And they hate us for daring to say she's a woman, not a snake.

[beelmons]

How to make interactive stories on tumblr (for writers)

Okay so recently I made The downfall of Spencer Reid which is an interactive (18+) story, reader insert, for Criminal Minds. Making an interactive story is very fun, and I'd love to see more around so this is a probably not so small tutorial for other writers that might be interested in doing something similar.

First of all, what's an interactive story? It's a piece of writing where the choices of the reader affect the outcome of the story, it's also commonly known as "choose your own adventure" story. They are specially fun with reader inserts, since it adds to the fantasy of having control.

Trace your plot and plan for actions

Like any other story or fic, you have to trace your story. While you do that, it's important that you think carefully about what are the possible decisions that the reader might come to face, and the possible consequences they might have on the story. Some common decisions are:

Choosing a piece of clothing

Deciding what place to go/path to take

Staying in or leaving a place

Using a tool, a different tool, or not using tool at all

To say or not say something

A specific action that the reader takes that affects the outcome for either better or worse.

These choices are what you call a "path", the new direction in which the story will go. You can have as many choices as you want on a single story, but remember every choice leads to a different path, and you have to have compelling stories for all of them. I'd suggest start with two main choices, and then a max of 2 choices on each path, this will likely lead to 4 possible endings for the story.

Rammifications and linking between posts

As I mentioned, every choice "breaks" the story into possible outcomes. For this, the specific challenge is to make every piece work between the choices. For example, let's assume you're writing an angst story, and the choices are as follows:

>Say you never loved him

>Say that you love him, but you can't be together.

These two choices will earn completely different reactions from the character that hears them, so you have to write both scenarios. Chances are, that the relationship the character will have after every choice will change. So probably if you choose "I never loved you", the character might go away or stop talking to reader altogether, while if you choose "I love you, but we can't be together" there's a chance the character will remain as a tragic lover and act jealous around reader. Drastic difference in what you need to write, right?

Another advice, if you don't want to make your story as long or have to think too much about the endings and plots, try to make your choices similar to each other, or even in a way that can lead to the same ending.

To do this, you have to take into consideration the following concepts:

Time and place: both choices have to be linear towards the ending, and if they happen on different places, they have to be able to match the place where the ending takes place as well.

Ambiguity: the choices will have different dialogue most likely, so you can't reference only one of the choice's dialogue, otherwise the readers taking the other path won't be able to recognize it or make sense of it, it's better to keep an ambiguous situation that could allow the reader to make sense of what they read before.

Continuity: The ending of both choice's have to match with the next part's beginning, otherwise you might break the illusion of it being the same story.

Example, picking up from the original example we gave on the last section:

X "You said you loved me, and I waited for you because I love you, but I can't keep going on like this, clinging on to faux hope, I should have realized way sooner that your heart wasn't empty because no one would fill you, it's because you won't allow anyone to."

If you used a dialogue like this, people who didn't chose the "Tell him you love him, but can't be together" option would question in what part of the story the words "i love you" were said. An alterative would be.

O "I waited for you because I loved you, regardless of what you said back then, but I can't keep going on like this, clinging on to faux hope, I should have realized way sooner that your heart wasn't empty because no one would fill you, it's because you won't allow anyone to."

With this dialogue, saying "Regardless of what you said back then" opens the opportunity for both choices to work, and now the reader can picture the choice they made in the first place, and it makes sense with the rest of the dialogue. Continuity isn't lost thanks to the ambiguity of the words.

Something similar applies to time and place, don't reference a place if one of the options makes it impossible for the characters to be in said ambience.

Formatting and posting

Formatting can become a bit of a hassle. On tumblr, HTML doesn't allow for different pages on one same container on posts, so you have two options, you can program the story on a single tumblr custom page (if you're familiar with HTML, this could be very fun and more immersive for the reader), or do it through posts, like I did with my first story.

Every choice will lead to a different post, and you will have to post them all before publishing the beginning of the story so you can link them altogether.

Now, of course if you can do that on your main blog, but it might ruin the experience for people who already follow you if they see the choices first and with broken links. I fixed this by making a side blog specifically for posting the story paths. I just used my same username and added -interactive at the end, lols.

Formatting the choices is quite easy, you just add them at the end (it's important that they are at the end) of the story and add the link to the post that they should lead to to go to the new path. I personally like to add "intended" to it so it looks more like a button, but you can use anny styling you like.

Now, the linking is where things can get a bit messy, it's hard to remember which path leads to what post, so don't be embarrassed to use any visual aid or titling system to keep track on what is what and what goes where. For my part, I usually redact everything on Google Drive first and use titles similar to code titles to keep track of them. This is a snippet of my upcoming fic, where we have a very first choice which is a clothing selection, and then the second choice which is the place selection. In this case, the clothing affects what happens in both places, so I have to write 4 different scenarios with both combinations.

First choice

Text where you get a second choice, but both choices have two outcomes from the original first choice.

This way, I can label my scenarios differently to keep track which belong in which choice. Like this:

Sometimes I have to re-read all the paths so I make sure the connections make sense, and if they don't, I have to rewrite some parts, but it's okay! The important thing is that the readers don't lose the engagement. Try to keep the stories short, 1k tops per post, at least at the beginning, so readers also don't feel like they are getting interrupted.

Have fun with it and write without being scared to fail! You can also start with blurbs or shorter stories. For my part, I have played a lot of otome games and choice-based text games so I started with a 4k fic (the one linked at the beginning).

Additional tips and experiences i went through

Try, by all means, to get a beta reader (shout out to my sister wives @ihavemanyhusbands and @cassiemartzz that constantly give me feedback). Beta readers will help you with spelling, continuity, and the overall sense of your story. Bonus if they are your friends and can be honest with you, and double bonus if they are also writers who can give pointers!

Use a flow chart: if you have managed programming before, a flow chart can give you an specific idea of the timeline of the story and the paths that are formed by the decision-making. I will add a picture of my most recent flow chart that I drew (yes by hand) for my upcoming fic.

I posted and reposted a million times (hence, why i needed a blog no one followed) before I posted the original story (which was posted on my main writing blog). I only posted the main story until i was sure all links worked properly.

Don't allow anyone to reblog the path posts, otherwise the experience might be broken for other readers. People mean well when they reblog, but they can reblog the main story (the very first post), you should config the path posts so they can't be reblogged by anyone.

Remember all path posts should be posted on your -interactive blog (or any other side blog you make), and the main story (the start of it) goes on your main writing blog.

Use titles on your tumblr post as well, so you don't miss which post contains what part of the story, you can delete them later before posting the main story.

Hopefully, this will be of help and we can begin to push interactive stories a bit further, they are really fun to write, and really really fun to play. Have a great writing, everyone!

Picture of the flow chart i made for my fic (I suggest only use if you're familiar with programming or flow charting for other disciplines, otherwise it might be just doodles):

[what-do-1000-swords-look-like]

I've seen so much discourse about the look of Dean in the finale of The Winchesters and why he looked that way, but I think the bigger picture is being missed here.

I'm speaking purely from the SPN character/story perspective here (and not discussing The Winchesters one way or the other or Jensen or Robbie or any of that in this post) but are we really surprised that at Dean deciding to go and find an AU version of his family that would not only be able to make their own choices but possibly get to have a happy ending?

Michael: "Think of a million random acts of chance. That let John and Mary be born. To meet, to fall in love, to have the two of you. Think of the million random choices that you make and yet, how each and every one of them brings you closer to your destiny. Do you know why that is? Because it's not random. It's not chance. It is a plan that is playing itself out perfectly. Free will's an illusion, Dean. That's why you're going to say yes." "You can't fight city hall."

Dean: "She's going to walk right into that nursery."

Michael: "Obviously. And you always knew that was going to play out one way or another."

Dean's expression:

So is it any wonder that Dean started knocking down dominoes? That he meddled? That he "gave it a nudge"? While he's also been trying to protect Sam who's still on his Earth? Or that Jack (his family/son and the new God) told him to finish what he'd started aka gave him his blessing by giving him the Colt and Dean's journal?

Nope.

Dean's always been fighting for his family.

And it makes perfect sense to have had Jack there (and if they had been able to make it happen, Cas, that line of "I was looking for my family" is multi-faceted, I see you Robbie; and no that's not looking through the Destiel lens, Cas is family regardless, Dean said it himself) along with Bobby (while Sam is mentioned) for this scene:

And that is what makes Dean's death in 15x20 so tragic (and why so many people were happy to see Dean in this context again). Dean broke free from the narrative (the expected ending for Dean - being a killer, dying violently on a hunt) and exercised his free will in 15x19 only to be sacrificed to it in 15x20 (aka losing his free will). Here, he is given some of that agency back while it also sets up The Winchesters crew to be free for their own narrative (if the show continues) and helps set Dean and Sam up to come back in the future to reclaim both their agencies and their free will. (just because Sam got out of hunting, got married, and had a kid doesn't mean he got his free will; like both J's have said, Sam was able to live his life for his brother but I guarantee if you gave Sam the choice 'aka his actual reward' between that life and having his brother back, we all know which choice he'd make; he lost everyone in his family to get that ending which was no reward for his own arc)

So regardless of whatever happened behind the scenes for the spinoff, whatever Jensen and Robbie had planned or didn't plan ahead of time, whatever blunders that occurred in the actual story of The Winchesters and the production/final airing of the show, THIS was very on brand for Dean.

Bonus:

Dean was no longer wearing the peacoat or looking so much like Jensen when he finally speaks to the AU John and Mary and all is revealed aka exposition, exposition, exposition.

He looked a lot more like Dean with slightly longer hair and some more scruff than we've ever seen Dean have before (plus this scene was obviously shot at a different time compared to the bus station scene). He was dressed like Dean; he finally sounded like Dean; he was Dean. So can we please stop talking about the peacoat and the turtleneck now? Or why Jensen had to keep those looks? It really overshadows the importance of the fact that once Dean was physically present in this episode, it not only complemented his SPN characterization but also his SPN story that sets him up for future SPN story telling. And regardless of where you stand with this show as a whole or Jensen as a celebrity/one face of two of the SPN brand, Robbie and Jensen did accomplish this tie-back to SPN Dean in a very beautiful way that doesn't in any way diminish the Dean we've come to know and love for 15+ years.

[yellowmagicalgirl]

she left me (I'm still here)

Coronabeth still can't believe that Ianthe left her. Gideon tries her best.

That's right, it's an Eberron AU for The Locked Tomb! This was written for Morike91 for the 2023 Battleship Exchange.

CW: references to canon-typical death and Coronabeth being suicidal

AO3

SquidgeWorld

“She left me,” Coronabeth said for the tenth time in the last hour. Gideon looked up from her rations to keep an eye on Corona. If Ianthe was here, then she could just have used her mark to cast Calm Emotions on her sister. If Ianthe was here, then maybe Corona wouldn’t be in yet another depressive spiral, a real one instead of one merely meant to manipulate. She hadn’t threatened to kill herself, just had several sobbing fits.

If Ianthe was here, then Coronabeth could have pretended to use the Mark of Handling on her right bicep to cast Calm Emotions on herself. But Ianthe wasn’t here. So many members of their party weren’t here. Ianthe had left with the two Radiant Cultists and had taken Harrow’s unconscious body with them. Palamedes and Naberius were both dead. Pal had been killed by the fiend that had been masquerading as Lady ir’Septimus. It sucked, really, since his life’s work had been to do what the halflings of House Jorasco had never been able to. Dulcinea had been long dead before they could have even tried. Camilhareth wanted to see if they could go to Dolurrh, to try and find Pal’s soul and maybe even the real Dulcinea’s too. When Corona had asked what they would do after they found Pal’s soul, Cam hadn’t been able to answer. It wasn’t like the party would be able to put Pal’s soul back into his real body, not after what Cytherea did to it.

Babs still had a body to resurrect. They just wouldn’t be able to find his soul, not unless they wanted to wait until it was potentially too late, and Pal’s soul had faded away. According to Ianthe, Naberius still lived on in the dragonmark she had stolen from him, or at least he would continue to until Ianthe had been able to absorb his soul and knowledge entirely. She now had two dragonmarks while her sister held none.

“How did you and Ianthe fake your mark?” Gideon asked before kissing Coronabeth on the forehead.

“We took the Test of Siberys together. Father wanted a matched set, and Ianthe gave him one. When she manifested her mark, she then used Prestidigitation to give me mine. Then she calmed the hippogriff while I used my strength to hold it down. Sure, she specializes in transmutation, but she’s always been good at illusions. She made my mark glow while making hers not. I later got it tattooed on.” Coronabeth sniffled. “And now, the next time we’re around an animal, everyone’s going to find out I’m a fraud. She left me.”

“I’m still here,” Gideon said as she placed her hand on top of her girlfriend’s.

“I know,” Corona said as her watery violet eyes met Gideon’s own. “But you’re not my sister.”

Author's Note: To dump some random setting notes:

Given that the Tridentarii are supposedly flesh magicians, I thought that either House Vadalis or House Jorasco would fit them, but I ultimately decided on Vadalis because I wanted them to be humans. Plus, I like the idea of Vadalis doing freaky experiments with dragonmarks more than I do Jorasco. They're both from Aundair, and so was Dulcinea.

Gideon and Harrow are both from Karrnath. Gideon is secretly an aasimar connected to the radiant idol known as Jod.

Naberius was, despite being from House Deneith AKA the fighter-iest house to fighter, a worse fighter than Gideon (who has probably multiclassed into paladin at some point) and Coronabeth (who is sticking to fighter).

Cam is a kalashtar from the line of Hareth. Given how kalashtar names are styled, I decided that changing her name to Camilhareth was a fitting choice.

[bestiesenpai]

Neophyte - Gojo Satoru

I shall feed you lol and here is the post they’re talking about, in case anyone would like context

Content warning: dumb inexperienced reader, age gap, almost exclusive usage of ‘little girl’ (reader still 18+ of course lads), uh losing virginity, spitting as well...oh and squirting too

Two weeks. That’s how long they said they’d be gone for, and although you were old enough to be on your own, your parents insisted on getting you a babysitter.

“Bye you two! We’ll call when we make it to the hotel!” Your mother shouted from the backseat of the car.

“Make sure (Y/N) doesn’t stay up too late, her sleep schedule is already bad as it is!” Your father added, loading up the bags in the back of the taxi. He chuckled when you groaned, and he sat in the car.

“Bye!” Waving goodbye, you watched them speed off into the evening sky, the sunset painting a pretty picture for their departure.

“Alright, first order of business: ordering some food!” Gojo announced, pulling his phone out of his pocket and walking to the front door. “What do you want, (Y/N)? I’m feeling like having pizza.”

“Pizza is fine.” Trailing after him, you tried not to let your gaze settle on him for too long. You didn’t hate having Gojo staying over, it was quite the opposite. You wanted nothing more than to run your hands through his crazy hair and have him kiss you senseless and there were plenty of nights you lied awake thinking about him with an ache between your legs, and it would only get worse as the days went by.

“Here’s to our first night together!” Gojo cheered, clinking his beer can against your soda. Leaning back in his chair, he took a massive bite of his pizza, making you laugh at how his cheeks puffed out. Your eyes wandered down to his beer, and you suddenly had a question.

“Gojo, can I try your beer?”

“Hm? You sure?” Lifting up the can with the edges of his fingers, he turned it over in his hand. “Why would a little girl want to try something like this?” A subtle heat rose to your cheeks, getting warmer when his eyes looked at yours.

“I’m just curious. Please?” Stretching your hand out, Gojo lets you take the can from him.

“Alright, but not too much.” He warned. Leaning back in his chair, a smirk spread across his face. The smell wafting up from the can was enough to give you pause, but you tipped your head back and drank anyway.

“Ew!” Curling your lip away as soon as the taste coated your tongue, you held it out for Gojo to take back. His laughter filled the air, getting even louder watching you chug your soda to rid yourself of the taste.

“Not your favorite?” He chuckles, taking a sip.

“No.” Shaking your head, a shiver rips through you. “How can you like that stuff?”

“When you’re a grown up, you’ll understand.”

“But I am grown up.” Gojo ignores your statement with another chuckle and a bite of his food.

Once dinner is over, it’s time for a movie. It’s Gojos idea, he wants you two to get comfortable with each other, after all he will be staying in your guest bedroom. He even went out for a quick run to the convenience store to grab you ice cream and a few treats to eat. Letting you pick the movie, he lounges on the end of the couch in a pair of breezy shorts, legs stretched out far and another beer in his hand.

Quietly eating the snacks he gave you, you keep your body curled up on the other end of the couch. You’d both changed into more comfortable clothing, and while you were fully clothed, it made a strange feeling bubble inside you to wear such short shorts near him. You had no problem wearing these shorts around friends, but with Gojo it felt different.

“I’ve never seen this before.” He comments offhandedly, swaying his leg side to side as the opening credits roll. “What’s it about?” He glances over at you and for a moment you think he’s staring at your bare legs, but then he’s making eye contact with you.

“Uhm…” Biting your lip, a wave of bashfulness goes over you. “It’s a romantic comedy.”

“Ah.” Nodding like he understands, he returns his attention to the screen. Your fingers twitch, wanting to grab the remote and change it to something more highbrow. Something that a grown up like Gojo would enjoy.

As the movie goes on, you’re painfully aware of every line that’s said. Usually, this film can make your heart race with how romantic it usually is, but now it’s just making you cringe. Taking a look at Gojo, he doesn’t seem to mind in the slightest.

“Woah, pretty steamy.” He chuckles at a scene, and you rip your eyes away to see what he means. Two characters are passionately kissing on screen, their hands gripping each other's clothing so roughly it looks like they might tear.

“We can fast forward.” As heat rises to your cheeks, you reach for the remote.

“No, it’s okay.” Grabbing your wrist to stop you, Gojo shrugs. “I don’t mind.” The feeling of his fingers wrapped around you lingers long after he’s let go. Watching the same hand go back to resting on his lap, the tips of his fingers just barely touching his thighs, makes more heat come to your face.

As the story progresses, you try to forget about the scene entirely. You’re able to let your body relax, even stretch out your legs onto the portion of the couch that’s been left unoccupied. There are a few more kissing scenes and they all make you nervous and bring your eyes to Gojos face to watch his reaction.

“I can feel you staring.” Gojo grins like a fool and turns to you, catching you right in the act.

“S-sorry.” Hiding him from view with your hand, you stare at the floor and try to push down the shame at being caught. Gojo laughs, an easy sound aided by the alcohol in his system, and his hand comes down to graze the top of your foot.

“What’s in that head of yours, little girl?” His hand firmly grabs your ankle, playfully pushing your leg side to side as he waits for an answer.

“It’s nothing.”

“It’s something.” He immediately counters, and the hand on your ankle tugs at you. “Let’s see, you only look at me when there’s kissing…” Putting more weight into his grip, he lets out a hum. “Are you trying to tell me you want a kiss?”

“No!” Gasping loudly, your head snaps to attention and instantly you regret it from the way a smirk seems permanently placed on Gojos face. He doesn’t say anything, just watches as you try to curl away from him.

“Sheesh, way to make me feel special.” Lightly scratching your leg, Gojo puffs out his chest a little. “I’ll have you know plenty of people have said I’m a great kisser.” A devilish look overtakes his face, a new thought having popped into his head. “I bet you haven’t even had your first kiss, huh?”

The noise you let out is stupid and unintelligible, and it tells Gojo all he has to know. The hand on your ankle goes a little higher to grab your shin and this time when he tugs at you, your body moves slightly.

“So what if I haven’t?” You try to save whatever dignity you have left by forcing your voice to be stern, but with a slight underlying waver it gives you away. When you make eye contact with Gojo now, you see his bottom lip caught between his teeth, and a look in his eyes that brings that ache back between your legs.

“How about we change that then?” He poses his words like a question but there’s not even the illusion of a choice presented. He sits up a little straighter in his seat, the shorts on his thighs riding up just a bit, and pulls on your leg again.

“I…” The tips of your fingers are tingling, nerves firing off at every possible point as you follow his lead. Sitting up on your knees, Gojo is quick to shuffle you over to him. His hands on your hips help steady you as you settle across his lap, and they quickly wrap your arms around his neck when he senses hesitation from you.

“Just let me do all the work, okay?” He whispers, voice just loud enough over the movie still playing in the back. His hand spreads across your lower back, pushing you closer to the apex of his legs. With a hand on the back of your head, he pulls you down to meet his lips.

Kissing Gojo was just as good as you imagined it to be. His mouth fit perfectly against yours, sliding on your skin and making your eyes fall shut. A soft groan leaves your mouth the longer he’s pressed against you, and your fingers weave into his hair. It’s unclear how long this simple lip lock lasts until you become hungry for more.

Carefully, your lips part. There’s a part of your brain that’s screaming out about your lack of experience, desperate to preserve your dignity and not make a fool of yourself. Pushing past that, the tip of your tongue presses against Gojos closed mouth.

“I thought I said to let me do the work.” Pulling away from you, Gojo clicks his tongue. “Such an eager little girl, aren’t you?”

“Yeah.” Keeping your eyes closed, you nod breathlessly. Shifting on his lap, you fully seat yourself onto him. With your ass pressing onto his legs, you can feel something hard and hot just out of reach in his pants.

With a chuckle Gojo kisses you again. Readjusting his grip on your head, he tilts it to the side and opens his mouth. He doesn’t need to do much more besides that and your mouth is already open. His tongue slides into your mouth at the same time his hand grabs your ass, and you moan because of both of them.

Instinct takes over any thoughts in your brain, all the worry and doubts you had dashed away. On shaky legs, you rut your hips forward onto Gojo, the friction catching on your clit. His tongue has barely made a home for itself in your mouth, and here you are humping him.

Letting go of your head, both hands clamp down on your ass. He forces you to slow down to an almost complete stop and he swallows the whine that comes out of your throat. Securing his feet onto the floor, Gojo gently pushes his hips up while he rocks you forward, and the noise you let out is one he will never forget.

The pace he sets is agonizingly slow, nothing like the one you’d had. Every brush of your body against his has your skin erupting in goosebumps and heat flashes across your body. Fingers tug his hair harder when the grip on your ass gets tighter, and you nearly throw yourself onto him more than you already have.

You don’t even realize the tiny little whimpers coming out of your mouth in a steady rhythm until they turn to wanton moans, a clunky sound you’re unsure about but make all the same. Gojo makes sound too, a deep grumble in his chest that manages to outdo you.

Time is lost with your lips against his. The movie that’s playing has long been forgotten, playing to an audience of no one. It’s soundtrack is a distant entity, muffled by the ringing in your ears and the heat accumulating between your bodies.

“G-gojo.” You pull back with a face hot as fire and eyes closed softly. A plea is on the tip of your tongue, and although you don’t know what you want, you’re ready to beg for it all the same. Gojo chases your lips, capturing them again for another searing kiss that makes you feel drunk.

He hums when he finally sets you free, the cool air from his nose fanning over your face. Forcing his body to relax, Gojo lets go of your ass and drops his hands to his sides. Letting his head fall back onto the couch, he blinks owlishly at the ceiling.

“Would you look at the time, it’s past your bedtime.”

“What?” Turning to look at the clock on the wall, your blood runs cold when you see what time it is. Grabbing his limp hands, you try to put them back on your body. “No, no forget about that.”

“I can’t. Little girls need to go to sleep when it’s time.” Gojo is fighting back a vicious smirk, forcing his face to remain as neutral as he can.

“Gojo, no!” You cry, bouncing on his lap like a child. His body remains limp as you attempt to engage him in another kiss, and frustrated tears rise in your eyes. “C’mon!” Your eyes flicker between his and you nearly throw yourself off his lap. “This isn’t fair!”

“Throwing a tantrum? I thought you were more mature than that.” Standing up and stretching his impossibly long limbs, Gojo clicked his tongue and flicked the TV off.

“Whatever.” Head clouded with lust and pent up frustration, you stormed out of the room much to Gojos pleasure. He followed after you slowly, stopping in the hallway when you get to your door.

“I don’t get a kiss goodnight?” He teases, and if looks could kill he’d be dead by now. The pout on your lip is almost negated by your puffy eyes straining to hold back tears. Laughing under his breath he walks up to you and pats your head. “Sleep well, little girl.”

“Yeah.” Nodding your head, you close your door and all but fall into bed. Your whole body is tense and unable to relax, the throbbing between your legs too much to ignore. Stripping down and crawling defeatedly under the blankets, you stare up at the dark ceiling.

Curling your fist, you punch the bed twice before shoving a hand between your legs. Your cunt is soaked all from a little bit of kissing, and in any other circumstance you’d be embarrassed. But this time, the only thing you could feel was an indescribable need to touch yourself.

Biting your lip hard between your teeth, your legs spread a little to accommodate the new arrival. There’s slick coating your skin, making everything a sticky mess. Inexperienced fingers press against your swollen clit and you gasp loudly.

“Shit.” A whine leaves your throat at the first touch, and your fingers rub clumsily along yourself. Pushing your head back against the pillows you try to recreate the feeling of grinding on Gojos lap. Every so often that spark hits you, but it’s not enough to get off to.

Slowly, you push a finger inside yourself, and then two. With a strain in your wrist you know you’ll feel tomorrow, you thrust your fingers in and out of your cunt. The wet clicking sound of your fingers is unmissable and you're quickly brought to a messy, uncoordinated orgasm.

“Shit.” You swear again, finally able to relax your body. Wiping your fingers on your blankets, you toss and turn to get into a comfortable position. The orgasm you had brought you some reprieve, but in the back of your mind you know it would have been better if Gojo had done it.

Waking up in the morning with the mess between your legs makes a wave of second hand embarrassment wash over you. Dressing quickly, it’s both a relief and a disappointment that Gojo has work during the day, early enough that you don’t see him in the morning.

Eating breakfast and lunch alone, there’s still a feeling in your body that won’t dissipate. The ache between your legs isn’t as strong as last night, but it’s still there, sitting in your body and ruining your underwear.

Your eyes keep staring at the clock, counting down the minutes until Gojo returns. There were other things you could have been doing, things that were more productive with your time, but every time you tried to move on it was impossible to focus and you found yourself back in the same spot.

When Gojo was nearly home, you sprung into action with a half baked plan. He’d texted you asking if you wanted takeout again or a home cooked meal, and you replied immediately that you would be cooking dinner. The only incentive you had to cook was to show him how responsible you were, and to make up for your show of emotions last night.

“(Y/N), I’m home!” Gojo announced as he opened the door. Toeing his shoes off, he waited for an answer or for you to appear before him, but he was left alone in the entryway. Walking past the lounge room, you weren’t there, and he was surprised to find you in the kitchen.

“Hi.” Giving him a quick wave, you kept your attention on the stove. His gaze lingered on you, a half smile on his face, but Gojo said nothing and left the room. You could hear him moving around the house, going to his room and changing into casual clothes and using the toilet before returning to you.

“So, what’re you making?” Standing close to you on the stove, he leaned over your body. His head brushed your temple and your breath hitched.

“J-just something easy.” You squeaked, painfully aware of how his hands settled onto the counters, trapping you against the stove and his body. He hummed but made no other response, and you just stood there together.

“Ya know, it’s kinda like you’re my little housewife, cooking for me after a long day of work.” His comment made you gasp. A million different scenarios ran through your head, all of them where you really were his wife in a house you shared together.

Keeping your lips pressed together to spare the sanity you had left, you nodded as a response. Gojo chuckled and got closer, placing his hands on your hips. Jumping when you felt his nose brush against your neck, you couldn’t move a muscle to question him.

“Having you as a housewife doesn’t sound too bad, now that I think about it.” His breath was loud in your ear, and so was the kiss he planted behind it. His teeth scraped against your neck, and he sucked lightly on your skin before letting you go. “Looks like it’s almost ready. I’ll go set the table.”

As soon as Gojo untangled himself from you, you let out a staggered sigh. With shaky fingers you turned the stove off and took the food off the heat, your eyes glued to the pan so he wouldn’t see your mortified face. Bringing the food to the table quickly, you stared at the table as you ate.

“So, do you like it?” You asked when he was more than halfway done.

“I do.” Propping his elbow on the table, Gojo flashed you a big smile. “I love whatever my little housewife makes for me.” Slapping a hand over your face in embarrassment, you sunk into your chair when he let out a laugh at your expense.

When dinner was over, Gojo insisted on helping you clean up. Rolling up his sleeves and pressing his body right against your back, he promised to do a good job washing the dishes, but he kept grabbing your hand and tangling your fingers together. By the time you finished, nearly an hour had passed and the ache between your legs was killing you.

“Come sit and watch the game with me.” He mumbled, grabbing a beer from the fridge and going to the lounge room.

“What game?” You followed him obediently, standing next to the couch as he took a seat.

“Baseball. I placed a few bets on tonight's game and I wanna win.” Cracking open the can, he took a long drink. “Come sit down.” Spreading his legs, he pat his thigh loudly.

“Okay.” Hesitantly climbing onto his lap, your hands gripped his arm as he pulled you flush against him. Gojos' chin rest on your shoulder, making you lay on his chest and feel every time he drew a breath.

“I’ve been thinking about you all day.” He whispers once a commercial hits.

“R-really?”

“Mhmm.” The arm around your middle tightens up. “Been thinking about kissing those pretty lips of yours.” You tried to turn your head to look at him, but he wouldn’t budge. Squirming in his lip made him groan, the vibrations traveling across your back. “What’re you doing, little girl?”

“I wanna kiss you.” At your admittance, Gojo lets you go and helps you turn around in his lap. The position is a familiar one, and your ass nestles against his thighs. Going in for a kiss, your brows furrow when he dodges your lips.

“Once there’s a pause in the game I’ll kiss you.” He says off-handedly, pushing your face out of the way.

“But-”

“Shh.” With a pinch to your ass, Gojo shuts down any protest. The same frustration you felt last night was coming back, coupled with annoyance at being ignored. You tried again to kiss Gojo, but he dodged you again.

“Fine.” Pinching him back, you practically collapsed in his lap. Watching the game over your shoulder, you truly couldn’t care less about it, but you needed to know the second there was a break.

But it seemed like there would never be one. Even when a commercial came, Gojo would keep your head pressed against his chest, stopping you from doing anything other than trying to wriggle out of his grasp.

“Gojo!” You cried, growing frantic. “Stop being mean!”

“Mean? I would never be mean to you.” He gasped dramatically. Letting you sit up, the smirk he had on his face had your fingers itching to slap him. Grabbing your chin, he pursed your lips and finally kissed you.

The taste of the beer on his tongue was something you could ignore when it entered your mouth. Getting what you wanted at last was the only thing on your mind. Your hands found their spot in his hair again, and you kept him pressed to you even when he tried to pull away.

“Someone’s needy, huh?” Gojo chuckled, finally able to break free and breathe.

“I’ve been thinking about you all day too.” The words fell out of your mouth before you had the chance to think.

“Oh, really?” Gojo quirked a brow. Resting his head in his hand, he licked his lips. “Tell me what you’ve been thinking then.”

“Uhm…” Suddenly feeling shy, you look down at his lap. You can see the outline of his cock straining against his pants and it makes you lick your lips. “I’ve been thinking about kissing you and-” A quick glance up makes your face flush with heat. “And about how you make me feel.”

“How’s that?” He presses, sliding a hand to your ass.

“I get all hot and sweaty, and that place starts to hurt.” Your hand does a vague gesture down to your crotch and it makes Gojo chuckle.

“That place? Do you mean your pussy?” Screwing your eyes closed at his question, you nod. Gojo lets out a little coo, his fingers affectionately squeezing your ass. “You poor baby, I bet it’s just a mess down there.”

“Yeah.” Spreading your legs further across his lap, you try to get comfortable with the wetness that had pooled in your underwear.

“What a shame.” Gojo clicks his tongue, and for a moment you think he’s going to kiss you again. But then his eyes dart to the TV and his body tenses. “Oh shit, I think I might win this game!”

“Huh?” Blinking rapidly, you shift again on his lap and look over your shoulder. Whatever was happening had his full attention, and not even your kisses along his jawline can draw him back to you.

Gojo keeps you seated on his lap for the entirety of the game, every so often kissing you like you wanted, just enough to keep you from leaving but not enough to satisfy you. When the game is over, he repeats the process of yesterday and sends you to your room for your bedtime.

Waking up the next morning is a struggle after being blue balled for two days straight. It was like the release you’d given yourself the first night meant nothing because it wasn’t done by Gojo. Stumbling into the kitchen in a shirt and shorts, you bumped straight into Gojo.

“Hey sleepy head.” He ruffles your hair affectionately, his eyes quite obviously staring right at your ass skirted by the hem of your shorts.

“Hey.” Leaning your head against his chest, you give him a sleepy hug.

“Still tired?” Gojo feigns like he’s interested in whatever you have to say while his hands go under your shirt. The pads of his fingers press into your lower back for a moment before sliding up.

Leaning back a little, you move your arms out of the way for him to bring his hands to your front. His palms cup your breasts, just as hot as your flesh. Grazing your nipples with his thumbs, Gojo hums to himself and nods.

“Can I see?” Gojo asks, slowly tugging up your shirt.

“Yeah.” You nod. He folds up your shirt and pushes the fabric into your mouth, letting go when you bite down. Your fingers are holding up the rest of your shirt, and Gojo squeezes your arms together, making your breasts push together.

“What pretty tits you have.” Leaning down, Gojo presses a kiss to the center of your chest, and another atop both breasts. You’re quick to say a muffled thank you and Gojo kisses you again. His nose is pressed onto your chest and it’s all he can do to pull away and pull your shirt out of your mouth. “Do you want some breakfast?”

“Shouldn’t you be at work?” You ask instead, blindly finding a seat at the dining table.

“I’m going in a little later today for a meeting.” Stepping up to the stove, Gojo sweeps his arm over the assorted ingredients he’s set out. “Now, do you want an omelette?”

When Gojo returns home the next few days after work, it’s either long after your bedtime or he’s too tired to do anything more than go to bed. He was caught up in meetings and late night work functions, leaving no time or energy to spend with you. When the weekend finally comes, you don’t even see him until the evening.

“Hey.” He opens his bedroom door the moment you open the bathroom door, a cloud of steam billowing out around you.

“H-hey.” Caught off guard by his sudden appearance, you grip the towel tighter to your body. His eyes flick down to your skin, slightly damp and smelling sweetly of your body wash. Your body moves on it’s own when he takes a step forward, pressing yourself against the doorframe.

“It’s been a while.” He’s in front of you in just a few short strides. Lithe fingers trace your neck, making you shiver as a tingle goes through you. His hand cups your face, turning it up to him. “I’ve missed you, little girl.”

Gojo kisses you before you have time to answer. What usually starts as a gentle kiss is far gone, replaced with a hunger behind his lips that leaves you trembling. His tongue slides into your mouth with ease, roaming all around your mouth while his teeth clink into yours.

Your thighs are spread apart by his knee shoving between them, and your fingers nearly drop the towel to grab onto him. His knee is pressed right against your cunt, grinding deliciously onto you.

“Gojo!” You gasp when he lets you free. Air rushes into your lungs and is expelled just as fast. His teeth sink into the side of your neck, sucking hard on the skin and lapping up any lingering water droplets. “Gojo, please, I-”

“I know.” He grunts, sucking on the junction of your neck and shoulder. A rough groan leaves his lips and his knee drops, replaced by the hard on straining against his pants. Rough hands rush to bundle up your towel around your hips.

“Fuck, look at you.” Gojo growls, his eyes staring directly at your cunt. “What a pretty little pussy.”

“Gojo!” Throwing your head back, you nearly sob his name when he ruts his hips into you. His hands are digging marks into your hips and thighs with every thrust, and if it weren’t for his body holding you up, you would have crumpled to the floor.

All the sensations are too much, mounting pleasure in your body that threatens to take over. One hand is mindlessly clutching the towel, needing something to ground you in the moment that’s quickly getting away from you.

“Shit.” After sucking a harsh mark into your skin, Gojo stops completely. He stands painfully still, his own orgasm nearly barreling over him. Wrenching his hands off your body, he fixes your towel and takes a tiny step back. Licking his lips, Gojo runs a hand through his hair.

“W-why’d you stop?” Looking up at him with wide eyes, your chest is heaving as you catch your breath.

“I don’t want to blow my load right now, that’d be kind of embarrassing don’t you think?”

“I guess.” At a loss for words, you watch helplessly as he takes another step back. The tent in his pants is painfully obvious. “So when? When can we…” Your eyes bounce around the room, skirting around the question.

“Soon, I promise.” Adjusting his pants, Gojo flicks his head to your bedroom. “Now go get dressed, wouldn’t want you to catch a cold standing out here.”

It’s nearly three days before Gojo kisses you again. He doesn’t kiss you, but he does everything else to you that he wants to do. Shoving you against the wall and fondling your ass before he leaves for work. Grabbing at your tits when you’re cooking or washing dishes. Making you perch your ass on his lap when he’s watching another baseball game, his fingers drawing patterns on your thighs.

“Gojo!” Finally, it’s your turn to corner him in the hallway. Blocking his way to the rest of the house, you cross your arms and fix him with your strongest glare.

“Yes?”

“I need you!” Stamping your foot, you know it looks childish, but you need to get your point across. Biting his lip, Gojo steps up to you, giving you a once over.

“Need me how?”

“You know how!” His question shakes your confidence a little, enough to make you break eye contact with him and look at the wall.

“I don’t think I do.” Rocking on his heels, Gojo shrugs dramatically.

“Like- like-” Dropping your arms, you do the only thing you know will work: you shove your hand onto his crotch, palming at his cock and making him jump. “Like this!”

“Woah, little girl.” He’s quick to grab your wrist, but he doesn’t pull your hand away.

“Please!” The whine you’d been fighting back comes out, and it’s music to Gojos ears. “You always do stuff and it makes me feel funny and I really need you.” The frustration makes tears well in your eyes as you look up at him, and he pouts his lip at you.

“Oh poor baby.” Taking your hand away from him, Gojo turns to your room. “Let’s go then. Seems I’ve been playing with you too long.” Rushing to your room, you sit eagerly on the edge of your bed. “Lay down.” He gently pushes your shoulder back, and your head hits the pillow.

Climbing on top of you, Gojo nestles his body against yours and kisses you. Gripping his shoulders tightly, you pull him down harder. The drought he’d put you through had driven you crazy, causing you to dream about his lips on you.

His tongue slid into your mouth quickly, tangling with yours and knocking his teeth with yours. The tips of his fingers skirted around the edge of your shirt for just a moment before delving deeper. Sliding his hand under your bra, Gojo tweaked your nipple.

Making quick work of your shirt, Gojo sat on his heels and peeled his top off. Your eyes were glued to his body, catching every little twitch of his muscles and dip and curve of his chest. He chuckled at your mesmerized face and leant down, taking your nipple into his mouth.

Grabbing your other breast, Gojo worked both your nipples to full hardness, alternating on sucking them into his mouth. The moans that came from your mouth were music to his ears, and your hips blindly rutted against him.

Flicking your nipples with his tongue one last time, Gojo kissed down your chest. Reaching your bottoms, he didn’t need to tell you to lift your hips up, your hands were already pulling them off with him.

“Shit.” Gojo breathed, laying between your legs. Your inner thighs and cunt were covered in your slick, and the heady aroma had Gojo eager to stick his tongue inside you. Sliding his hands underneath your thighs, he set them on his shoulders.

Spreading your lips with his thumbs, Gojos tongue flicked your clit, making your hips nearly shoot off the bed. Your hands immediately wound into the sheets as he continued his ministrations.

“Gojo, please.” You cried, growing tired of the little flicks he was giving you.

“Be patient, baby.” He replied, quickly sucking your clit into his mouth. Your thighs tried to close around his head but his hold on your body was strong. Digging his hands into you, Gojo pulled your cunt closer to his mouth.

Shoving his tongue into you, Gojo lapped tirelessly at your gummy walls, loudly swallowing your essence mixed with his saliva. His nose rubbed your clit, relentless in his pursuit in tasting you. Muffled groans came from his mouth, the vibrations adding to the pleasure.

Pressing his thumb against your clit, he rubbed it furiously. Gojos eyes were screwed closed as he worked you to your first orgasm, his jaw beginning to ache from the force he put behind his tongue.

“Gojo-” Your body tensed up as the orgasm hit you. The fingers gripping the sheets threatened to tear them, your nails digging dangerously into the fabric. A loud, drawn out moan left you and your eyes rolled back.

“Fuck yes, baby.” Gojo wrenched your thighs open and sat up on his elbow. His thumb on your clit didn’t slow down, milking you through your orgasm. When your body relaxed, Gojo shoved his fingers into you, too worked up himself to worry about stretching you out properly.

The two fingers he had inside you stuffed you more than your own fingers ever could. Your walls stretched to fit around the long digits, clenching hard around him. His thumb pressed against your clit again and he began to move his fingers in and out of you at a steady rhythm.

The overstimulation from your first orgasm gave way to pleasure the more he fucked you on his fingers. Gojos palm slapped against your sex with every thrust, mixing with your moans and echoing around the room.

The second orgasm came much quicker than the first, and it was tinged with pain at the edge of your senses. Letting out a loud groan at the feeling of your walls milking his fingers, Gojo pulled out and sat back, roughly ripping his shorts off and exposing his leaking cock to the air.

“Think you can take my cock, baby?” He asked, gripping his cock hard at the base.

“Yes, please!”

“Good answer.” Grabbing your hands, he placed them under your thighs and pressed them to your chest. “Be a good girl and hold your legs for me.” Eager to please, you got a good hold on your thighs and waited.

Both of you stared at his cock lining up with your slit. Taking his time, Gojo pushed the tip past the tight ring of muscle and thrust softly, slowly working you to take his whole cock.

“How does it feel?” He asked, laughing breathlessly.

“Strange.” Your answer made him laugh more.

“Am I the first one to fuck this pretty pussy?”

“Yeah.” A wicked grin spreads across Gojos face and he leans between your legs to kiss your forehead.

“This old man sure feels special.”

“You’re not old!” You gasp, loosening your hold on your legs. “Not at all!”

“Legs, baby.” He taps your hands and you quickly right yourself. Pressing his hands into the pillow beneath your head, Gojo forces your legs to bend a little more. “I’m a dirty old man compared to you.”

“No-” You go to protest again, but the sharp snap of his hips into yours cuts you off. Your head immediately falls back, exposing the column of your throat for Gojo to lean forward and kiss. He pulls back again, making sure you feel the full length of his cock before snapping forward again.

Gojo thrusts into you with no mercy, lust clouding his senses and any reason in his head. Your walls are so tight, they almost grip him enough to stop him from pulling out again. He’s waited so long to feel you wrapped around him, and now that he has you he doesn’t want to waste a single second.

His heavy balls slap against your ass with each thrust, adding to the cacophony of sounds mixing together in your room. Your slick is being fucked out of you and dripping down between your ass and onto his balls, creating a damp spot beneath you.

“Such a good little girl.” Gojo pants, cupping your face with his hand. Swiping his thumb across your lower lip, he grins when you take it into your mouth and suck hard on it. “Taking my cock so well, like you were made for it.”

“Mhmm!” Nodding, you let go of one leg to hold onto his hand, lacing a few fingers together. Pressing his thumb against your tongue, Gojo pulled your mouth open and pursed his lips. Letting his saliva drip down into your mouth, he felt a swell of pride watching you swallow it immediately.

Your hand slid off your leg, the sweat accumulating on your body making you lose your grip. With your feet dangling near Gojos head, he pressed a quick kiss to your ankle before digging his hands underneath your ass and angling your hips up.

“Fuck!” You squeal loudly at the new angle and your hands scramble to push against Gojos hips. “T-too much!” Gojo barks out a laugh and swats your hands away, pining one to your side as he pounds into you.

“Shit, how’d you get even tighter, little girl? I can barely pull out.”

“Gojo, please!” Tears begin to gather on your lashes from the onslaught of pleasure, and you let out a short yelp at feeling his fingers against your puffy clit. “Please, please it’s- fuck-” Your head thrashed against the pillows, unable to run away from the feeling.

“Be good and squirt on my cock.” Gojo growled. He was close to cumming himself, your cunt that he’d denied himself for so long was just as good as he imagined it to be. It was all he could do to make sure you came before he filled you to the brim with his cum.

“Stop I’m gonna- Gojo- pee, I’m gonna-” You babbled mindlessly, tongue falling out of your mouth and making drool coat your chin. Seeing your fucked out face had Gojos racing heart pounding even harder.

Hunching over, he forced your legs to nearly touch your head as he rutted into you. Barely pulling his cock out all the way, Gojo worked your clit in his fingers and was rewarded with a high pitched moan, akin to a scream in his ear.

“Fuck-” He grunted. The force of your orgasm was nearly pushing his cock out all the way, your juices gushing around him. Sinking his teeth into your leg, Gojo came inside your spasming cunt, fucking his cum out with yours.

You were nearly sobbing by the time he fully stopped thrusting. Your body ached all over, muscles that had been pulled taut were finally being released and allowed to relax. Gojo slid your legs off his shoulders as he panted for breath.

Slowly pulling out of you, he stared at his softening cock absolutely covered in your release. His entire lower region was glistening in the light of the room and the wet spot on the bed was much bigger now.

Sliding out of the room quietly, he returned with a damp towel. Quickly wiping himself, he gingerly wiped down your sex, letting out little giggles when your body twitched uncontrollably. Setting the towel to the side, he smiled down at you.

“Hey little girl.” His grin turned into a full toothed smile at seeing your dazed face, drunk off his fuck and cum. A dopey smile spread across your face and you lifted a tired hand to grab at his. Giggling bashfully, you pressed your face into the pillow to get away from his stare.

“What?” You asked, feeling your cheeks heat as he continued to look at you.

“Nothing, just looking at my pretty girl.” Squeezing your hand, Gojos eyes glance at the wet spot on the bed. “Ya know, it’s almost your bedtime, and I can’t have you sleeping in a wet bed.” Humming like you were following along, you giggled again when his hand squeezed your waist.

“What?”

“Are you listening to me?” Gojo chuckled, squeezing you again and making you jump. “Come sleep in my room with me.”

“Okay.” Helping you stand, Gojo led you to his bedroom. Even though it was the guest room, it felt like he had always lived in this room. It smelled of him, and his clothes were everywhere. Flopping onto the bed, you yawned as soon as your head hit the pillow. “Gojo.”

“Yeah?”

“I’m hungry.” Gojo snorted loudly and nodded. Helping you under the covers, he slid on a pair of shorts.

“Alright, I’ll get you a snack. Try to stay awake.” You give him a lopsided thumbs up that makes him snort again. Turning on his heels, he knows as soon as he comes back, you’ll be passed out and snoring into his pillow. And he’s right.

[asgardwinter]

Out Of The Window

summary | Loki always blocked everyone out and he was fine living like that. Then you appeared in his way and decided to throw his rules out of the window.

pairing | Loki x Reader

warnings | Loki needs a hug and more comfort, the rest is pure fluff because I need emotional support again 🙃

word count | 1,6k (another oneshot that was supposed to be a blurb, I'm not sorry)

author’s note | I really think after everything Loki went through he’d be difficult to become closer to. I’m extremely insecure about this one (for no particular reason) so if you like pls let me know…

Loki Laufeyson Masterlist | Taglist | Main Masterlist

Loki was distant and cold.

It might be an illusion but was what everyone believed. He gave his best so that everyone accepted the lie that he didn't care about anyone else other than himself. It was the easiest way and after centuries of loneliness he was done trying to find others that would care for him.

He was always involved in shallow conversations, well informed about the gossip that ran the compound — Loki was incredibly well informed on those matters — and offering snarky comments at the team meetings and during kitchen conversations. However, Loki stayed as far as he could from the deep talks Sam initiated trying to help his colleagues, from game nights specially planned to make the team work better and from possible friendships. He loved to talk about himself until someone made a comment or a question that would expose feelings he shoved to the dark places of his mind.

“A god doesn’t talk about these matters with mortals.” That was one of the recurrent answers that only made everyone roll their eyes and change the subject.

Hugs, holding hands, even a hand on his shoulders to show support weren’t well received by the god. Loki banned comforting touches from his own world a long time ago and there was no need to review that choice. The same person that was trying to help him would go away or be hurt by something he did, which didn’t usually take long.

It’d always be like this so he only locked people away from him, keeping them distant enough so he wouldn’t get hurt more than he already was. The rules of not letting people come close, emotionally and physically, were perfectly functioning and kept his heart safe.

But every lie is shattered one day, even one made by the god of mischief, the most talented liar. And it all happened just because of you.

…

You were just an great agent made avenger.

No super powers and no special talent when compared to super soldiers and Norse gods. Loki remembered what went through his head when Steve announced you were joining the team, “What another simple mortal would be adding?”.

In the matter of three days he changed his opinions on you. Not because of your talent for smashing random objects in the head of your enemies to take them down flawlessly, but because you were always able to read him like an open book.

And it scared him at the same proportion it made him angry.

How dared this silly human invade his ilusion like that? He was doing fine without someone looking twice at his face to check if he was being honest when he said he was ok, when he said it didn’t matter.

You knew that Loki cared and wanted affection and it was freaking him out.

Out of nowhere you started to sit next to him in the morning and ask directly his opinion on some matters, not some general comment to make it look like he was included. Loki tried to let it pass, to ignore, because it was a certainty that you’d give up in no time, but when you continued to try the only thing he could do was answer you.

After some days he started to want to ask things back to you, make the conversation longer and it was also scary. So, eventually he decided a few more words would do no harm.

That’s when one of the rules was broken.

...

Book recommendations started to appear at the compound library for him.

The first time Loki saw a book sitting by the coffee table with a small note saying “I think you’ll like it :)” he thought it was some trick, so he ignored it.

The books didn’t stop appearing, every week there was a new one with a different note written on a different paper, only the same handwriting. “Give it a try!”, “Maybe this mystery will be more of your liking, your highness…”, “Would you accept this terrible classical romance between a human and a vampire?”, the notes were only growing more bold until he finally decided to give it a try.

Coincidently, the day he picked your more recent choice, you entered the library holding a book he just finished a week ago. With so many free seats you opted for the same couch he was on, giving him a small nod after opening your book.

Loki saw your eyes wandering through his book’s cover and a small smile making its way to your lips. He could swear it was the most beautiful smile he ever saw and he was afraid he’d do anything to see it again. What was happening to him?

“I see you took my recommendation.” You said happily..

Loki seemed a little lost, until he looked away from your face to find the book on his lap. Pretending that his heart wasn’t racing just a bit, he shrugged and opened the book.

“I didn’t have anything else to read.”

And you saw right through the false casualiness that he chose it. It was obvious to you and, for the first time, he didn’t hate that. He was quite happy that your smile grew a little wider at the realisation.

You nodded. “Well, I hope it takes you out of your boredom.”

Those late night silent readings at the library became a routine when there weren't any missions or work to worry about. One time you asked him if he liked the book and you both started talking nonstop about it. It was one of the best nights for both of you and the talking only increased ever since.

Loki kept telling himself that he wasn’t getting attached, that your company didn’t make that much of a difference.

Until you weren’t there one night and he felt lonely.

And he had lost count on how many rules he had broken.

...

Saturday nights were reserved for movies at the compound. Tony said it was necessary for the team to spend time together to form connections and other psychological arguments but everyone knew he wanted to torture everyone with bad movies. In the end everyone was always there and it served for it’s made up objective.

Well, everyone was there minus Loki. He never went to a movie night no matter how much anyone tried to convince him at the beginning. So no one asked anymore, they just let him get up from his seat in the kitchen and disappear through the door with nothing more than some smart comments that made Tony roll his eyes and call him a diva — not a complete lie.

“The rules are clear, Wilson. I’m not telling anyone about the movie until it’s playing.” Tony said like he did every Saturday night. “Staring at me with that ugly face of yours won’t change it, Barnes.” Every day was a new avenger trying to get the movie out of Tony, until now all were unsuccessful no matter how hard they tried, you included. With time people started to give up, but Sam and Bucky were the type to not let such a battle go that easily.

Everyone started to get up from their seats, going to the living room, Loki was ready to walk back to his room and enjoy the silence and calm until this time something went out of the routine.

Loki startled when he felt a warmth in his hand. He looked down and felt his heart start a funny beat he didn’t authorize when he spotted your pinkies intertwined. It was an incredibly small thing most people would give nothing to, but that moment Loki felt he could burst in flames at any second.

“Can you join us just this time?” You asked in a soft voice, looking so deeply into his green eyes he was sure you saw his soul.

“I don’t think my company will make any additions if you're going to be focused on the movie.” Loki said, looking away from your hands and trying to get up and go away. You didn’t let him escape this time.

“Movie night is really not about the movie.” You said in what was supposed to be a teasing tone, but he could see you were getting tired.

You were tired of seeing him run away like that when you’d get close, you always thought you were making progress until he turned down your invitation to go out somewhere. You only managed to spend time with him when it was a casualty, when you found out by accident what time he went to the library and started to go at the same time, when you guessed when he woke up to be there too.

If he didn’t want you around that much, why didn’t he change his schedule to not meet you there?

“Please, give me a chance.” You begged him, the other hand resting lightly on his cheek just to make his eyes find yours. “Give us a chance.” That last part was only a whisper, but he heard it.

Loki looked at you then to your hands again, seeing the tiny fingers wrapped together. His heart started racing at the thought of you asking so clearly to be a part of his life, he didn’t even know he’d be able to answer you in words so he nodded in response. Those silly rules were better flying out of the window, he realised.

Smiling widely, you tugged lightly on his finger, getting up from your seats and entering the living room. The curious eyes of the others followed closely but you didn’t pay any attention to it, and silently thanked them for saying nothing teasing. Loki was sure someone would bring the matter up in the next few days, he just couldn't care less in that moment.

Sitting by your side, Loki didn’t let your pinky go.

One week later he had his arm carefully placed around your shoulders.

In the next one, your head was lying on his shoulder.

And, well, Loki never missed movie night again.

[bored-storyteller]

Hey! I really like how you write about Sally Face, I love how you highlight his kindness but also his strength. It struck me a lot how he wonders if anyone will ever love him, I guess it's hard for him to believe in someone's love for him, from a romantic point of view. I thought ... could you write something about a reader in love with him, who gets rejected for that reason but still loves him until Sal dies? You don't have to do it (also because you prefer angst / comfort right?), But I try to ask you ... I'd like to see it written by you. It will hurt but it will be worth it.

Dear Anon,

I hope you like this because I suffered the pain of hell writing this :3

But jokes aside, I hope it does justice to your expectations, I hope I have treated everything with the right delicacy.

Warning: ANGST and SPOILER (I say this for safety)

The story is set in the canonical plot, even if there may be slight differences (after all there is always one more character, you). But for those who haven't played Sally Face this could be revealing.

77- Sally Face, Sal Fisher x reader (Angst)

“The sunflower that cannot bloom “

"I love you."

Those words had slipped off your lips with one of the most beautiful smiles Sal had ever seen.

You weren't perfect, but you were tailor-made for him. Somehow, he had thought that from the first day he met you, by mistake, on a black day. You had offered him a sunflower, a huge yellow flower that shone like the sun in the midst of his misfortunes, and his black day had grown better.

This was you, what he needed when the weight was too much to carry, when he found himself snorting one too many times, when he felt like crying.

Still, even though you were tailor-made for him, he wasn't tailor-made for you.

He would have liked to believe you, with all his heart, he would have asked for nothing more than to be loved by you.

But he couldn't believe it.

"No, you don't ..." His voice was gentle, as if he were explaining something important to a little child.

Your brows had furrowed as you pointed your gaze into the depths of his soul.

"You do not believe me?" Your tone wandered between uncertainty and offense "Do you think I'm lying to you?"

A sigh rang through the empty hollows of his mask: “No, you're not lying to me. I just think you… don't really know what you're saying. "

Your expression deepened as you prepared to argue back. He had seen the wound open inside you and he had looked away; he couldn't watch you while he hurt you.

Oh, he was so good at making himself loved. The river of emotions that had overwhelmed you had died out as soon as his one living eye was separated from you.

Disappointment, anger, sadness had disappeared in favor of affection for him.

His mask was flat, helpless, cold towards his heart, yet he communicated more than anyone else with that immense little soul of him.

"Sal ..." finally you called him gently, reassuring, while your fingers lovingly brushed the cheek of the cold prosthesis.

"I love you." You repeated it, and he turned to tell you to stop. He couldn't be loved, he didn't feel capable of being loved.

He would never have a love like that of movies, or even like that of normal people, like Maple and Chug. He, as he was, could never have been loved, not even by you.

He was going to tell you, to tell you everything, but you stopped him softly: "but it's okay if you don't want to."

You barely laughed, as if everything was really okay with you, and you leaned on his shoulder, cuddling against his neck.

"I have my whole life to make you understand." You said cheerfully, and he just looked at you, accepting that little stubbornness of yours.

Even though he was aware that one day he would see you happy in the arms of someone you really would love, for the time being it was okay for him to bask in that little illusion you were giving him.

---

Life had been cruel.

"I had no choice."

Those words had pierced your brain.

The first time he had told you with a force that you almost confused with anger. His body had never been so rigid in front of you, motionless, sitting on the other side of the table in the visiting room of the prison, surrounded by other inmates like him.

You wondered if you were sane, because you looked into the eyes of a murderer, a killer who had exterminated families, who had even killed a little girl, yet your tears were for them, but also for him.

Whatever it was, Sal hadn't changed, and behind his mask he was more broken into pieces than you were. He hadn't had a choice, for some reason he hadn't had a choice.

It was weird and unreal, but you had no doubts about him, even though your mind still couldn't believe what happened, and Sal probably didn't really realize it either.

However, the second time he told you "I had no choice" his voice was different. He was different, and so were you. You had grown up, but both of you had stood still in what had happened. At that moment he was telling you so that you believed him, so that you knew it was not what he wanted, because if he could have chosen at that moment you would have been together in front of a pizza, telling you how boring the day had been.

"I beg you ..." You whispered so as not to let him hear how broken your voice was "... tell me what I have to do to save you."

It was the first time you used that word, out of pure desperation.

For a moment he hesitated and hoped you wouldn't see his uncertainty behind the mask. Finally, Sal shook his head in silence; he didn't know if it would do any good, but at least he would try to protect you.

Your hand was holding his for the first time in years, and you both knew it would be the last time you would hold it. You had done everything to be able to have that last contact, to still be able to hold him before they took him away from you forever.

You didn't want to cry, you wouldn't have done it on your last time together, but your heart was so heavy that you thought you would die as soon as you separated.

While you massaged the back of his hand with your thumb, you tried to record every detail in your mind that belonged to him, to burn the heat of his palm against yours, to remember the exact weight of his touch.

I love you, you wanted to tell him, you never stopped doing it, not a second you stopped giving him your best side, and you would have given it only to him also in the future.

"You are so important to me, Sal ..." your blue sky under which sunflowers bloom.

"Thank you ... for always being with me."

Part of you died when you let go of his hand that day.

---

Until the last you hoped that something would happen. A ghost that suddenly appears, an angel, a new discovery ... anything, as long as he was kept away from that electric chair.

When your phone rang, you were deluded for a moment.

"Hey…"

"Sal?"

"They ... allowed me to call whoever I wanted ..."

Your heart fell on hearing his voice. It was his last day, his last day in your own world, that was his farewell to you.

"Sal, I-" Your words broke into a sob you couldn't hold back "I'm with you, I'll always be with you."

Silence invaded the line between the two of you as you tried not to give him your tears as your last caress.

"I know it." He was holding back the crying, you could hear it "And I'll always be with you too, know that."

You were tailor-made for him, and his heart would remain for you, even if you moved on, you would love someone worthy sooner or later, or at least he hoped you would, that the demon would not devour your future. .

"Bring me some sunflowers if you can ... ok?" That request trembled "They always make me think of you."

You forced yourself to cover your mouth with your palm to stifle your agony: "I'll fill you with sunflowers."

Something told you that even if you couldn't see him, he was trying to smile: "It's a bit a cliché but ... be happy."

You would have preferred to have died in that very moment.

"Sal, wait!" You begged for him now, holding on to the phone like it was him, like you could hold him there.

He hesitated at the desperation of your voice.

"I can't ..." his voice was soft, light, like when he consoled you years ago, when all this seemed simply impossible.

“I beg you…” You didn't know who you were really praying for, but you weren't ready to hear his voice go out.

One more minute, one more touch, a hug.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry you had to put up with this." A sob from him too. “Please… fight for your happiness, okay? You deserve all the happiness in the world. "

"Sal ..."

The answer that followed was the only intermittent sound of the blank phone line.

It's over, you'll never be able to hear Sal's voice again. You won't be able to talk to him anymore.

And he never believed you loved him.

---

How could you ever be happy?

His mask still looks at you as it always did, but behind the empty gaze there are nothing but blades of grass growing above his burial.

How could they bury him without his mask? He will feel uncomfortable.

Now you don't have to be strong for him anymore, you can collapse, break, destroy yourself, scream like you've never screamed, ask him to come back, because you need him.

Your fingers caress the cold, hard cheeks of his prosthesis as they always did, as if he were still behind it. Next to it, the sunflower he asked you for, like the one you gave him the first time you saw him.

"I love you Sally face ..." your words now go to the wind, they cannot be refused.

"I really love you."

---

Where you don't know, where you are not, a guy who has the weight of the world on his shoulders thinks about how much he could never be loved as people love each other in movies, or how people love each other in the world. But suddenly, like a ray of light, in the darkness he is facing, the yellow of a sunflower blooms. It's just a thought, but for a moment it's warm, and sweet, and it carries your voice with it.

You exist only within him, but you give him the love he needs, the one he didn't believe in, but which instead exists.

It is a tormented love, which suffers, but still welcomes him and wraps him as your arms did.

You are not there, you are far away, unreachable.

But he feels it, you're still there with him

[angelsndragons]

fjord’s feelings for caduceus changed in episodes 98-99

by which i mean, fjord finally realized how special and important he is to caduceus, which in turn set the tone of their relationship for the rest of the campaign. buckle up, this is a long one.

not when fjord threw away his sword and went to caduceus instead of jester. or when caduceus presented him with the star razor. or after the citadel fight when caduceus gave him his holy symbol. i think things changed for fjord in episode 98-99, when caduceus saved his life and removed the orb.

this is going to require some context.

because here’s the thing: fjord’s always looking for the price, waiting for the catch or other shoe to drop. people caring for him because of him with no strings attached is unprecedented. vandren and the world taught fjord that love is conditional, that only if you hide what others would find ugly and make yourself useful to them will they deign to give you a scrap of affection. i don’t think vandren did this maliciously, mind you, it was just part of his worldview and fjord’s life up to and beyond that point supported it. we can see that right up to the end of the show, where fjord is terrified that vandren didn’t remember him or that he didn’t mean nearly as much to the man as vandren did to him.

so we have fjord, who learned to don masks and hide his truest self, including his best and worst aspects. while fjord made the nein into a coherent group, into a force, a crew, a family, even, he still waited for that other shoe to drop. waited for the day that they would reject him because he was no longer useful or because he pushed them too far. you can see this waiting all over the early campaign; he’s not looking for an excuse like caleb to cut and run but he anticipates nearly all the moments that almost fractured the nein, in spite of that low wisdom score. while jester carried the guilt of not being able to save molly, fjord carried the guilt of not protecting the group in that crucial moment. travis confirmed on talks that fjord’s biggest fear when he lost his powers the first time was that he would no longer be useful and be kicked out of the group. 

that’s why fjord damn near broke down at the end of 72. the nein, no questions asked, with their standard level of snark, accepted that he was going to be a liability and kept him around anyway. armed him anyway. declared that he was no liability and that they would help him along until he could help himself and them again. this unconditional acceptance caught fjord completely off guard. it always does, really. because caduceus had said for months, an out of game half a year, that he was looking to reforge the sword as a gift for fjord. he said this to fjord’s face. he did not change course when he learned that the sword was a legendary blade forged by acolytes of the wildmother and moonweaver. the blade was still meant for fjord, even if fjord was still chained to uk’otoa. fjord extends his love and protection to the nein but is still not convinced the reverse is true. he was starting to believe it but he wasn’t quite there yet.

caduceus has a high enough wisdom to understand that’s fjord’s hang up even if he doesn’t quite understand the reasoning behind it. that’s why he pulls fjord aside in ep 75 and tells him that he doesn’t have to choose the wildmother, that there are other gods and other ideas out there looking for a champion. fjord, who at this point considers wildmom his only option (travis says she’s the only one who’s shown the slightest interest in fjord and that’s why he’s gunning for her), is befuddled by caduceus and this whole talk, so much so the pair end up talking past each other for the next several episodes.

after fjord officially becomes a paladin, things between him and caduceus become fairly...unsettled compared to their previous interactions. they talk past each other more, they aren’t in sync enough to double team those social interactions they were just starting to get good at. things are just weird for a while. to me, that’s fjord waiting for the catch, waiting for caduceus to call in some favor or something like it. and he keeps getting confused when caduceus doesn’t. so he tries once or twice to follow in caduceus’ footsteps and do as he would instead. and it just makes things weirder. these two don’t have a moment together that doesn’t leave one of them confused or unsatisfied until ep 87, when caduceus gives fjord the holy symbol and inadvertently kicks off the next phase of their relationship. because here, caduceus tries to put them back on equal footing and fjord recognizes it. caduceus rejects framing their relationship as mentor/student and tells fjord he doesn’t need caduceus to give him answers. fjord is “well on his way.”

by defining what they aren’t, mentor/student, our two boys inadvertently ask the question, “so what are we?” honestly, it’s a question that the entire group grapples with in the 90s as they reintegrate yasha, as veth struggles with the question of changing back and whether she can stay with the nein, as beau tries to sacrifice herself for veth, as jester learns some uncomfortable truths about the traveler, as caduceus finds his family again. fjord and caduceus can easily define what they aren’t - not mentor/student, not brothers or cousins- but what they actually are stumps both of them.

their relationship doesn't look like any of their relationships with the others: beau is fjord's bro and first mate, caleb is fjord's complicated mirror and admiree, jester his crush and first person he learned to be vulnerable with, veth his antagonistic sibling. on caduceus' side, caleb is the one he looks to for a fellow project nerd and clear, unvarnished goals, beau and jester are the sisters caduceus misses, yasha the quiet beloved barbarian he understands better than the rest, and veth a mess he wants to help but can't. but fjord and caduceus' relationship is highly undefined at this point. notably undefined, beyond their newly shared connection to melora. at the dinner with essek, we get the stone bomb. and travis and fjord panic. like no, seriously, they spend the next four episodes low key panicking over this revelation. this ties back to fjord waiting for those other shoes to drop but it’s also more than that.

when it comes to destiny, fjord has always been the answer, the self made man, to both caduceus and caleb’s questions about destiny. he makes choices about who he is, who he wants to be, and takes actions towards those goals. he is one of those rare people who can wear many different masks, take on many different roles, while still maintaining his sense of self and becoming a fuller version of who he is. when I say fjord is the answer to destiny, what i mean is that he is what ioun said way back in c1 about Fate: mortals make choices and through those choices, destiny is fulfilled. he is the answer to caduceus' own growth from passive instrument waiting for someone to play him to active communicator in this conversation between gods and mortals. in this sense, fjord is what caduceus learns to be (this is exactly why caduceus rejects a mentor role; he has as much to learn from fjord as vice versa).

so for this coincidence to pop up, this idea that maybe fjord only had the illusion of choice to extend his service to the wildmother, that maybe somehow he was manipulated again, that there was some grand destiny pushing things and fjord had no say in it, yeah, i can see why fjord was low-key terrified. so is this what fjord and caduceus are: just some predestined grand fairy tale partnership neither of them have that much say in? episode 96 resoundingly rejects that label too. for one thing, none of the stones or clays treat fjord's last name as anything amazing or spectacular. for another, this string of episodes gives us caduceus at his most human. the terror of not knowing what happened to his family, the uncertainty of his homecoming, the relief of saving his family and home, the irritation at the way the chaos crew treats the temple, the playful attitude caduceus cultivates after, it's all on display. caduceus drops much of his placid exterior and willingly allows the nein to see sheer depth of emotion he has.

which leads me back to episode 98-99. uk’otoa’s agents come for fjord. and caduceus is pissed. travis and ashley both said on talks that they hadn’t really seen taliesin that pissed, that it was like someone had threatened an actual loved one of his. fjord dies. and comes back to an exhausted, still pissed off firbolg who is five seconds away from snapping archmage vess derogna’s head off for interrupting his prayer of healing. taliesin doesn’t even begin to relax until they start interrogating the dead fish people the next day. once caduceus confirms the ball is still in fjord, notably caduceus and caleb were the two who remembered, fjord starts asking for a way to remove it. he asks caduceus to start a commune with wildmom in tandem with jester’s commune with the traveler. caleb tells fjord that caduceus fought “very hard for you while you were down, i don’t know if he’s up to it.” having heard that, caduceus still tries, with his first divine intervention attempt of the campaign. and when jester figures out that greater restoration will work, caduceus pushes through his exhaustion, takes charge, and goes through a truly terrifying greater restoration with fjord to remove the ball. convulsing, seizing, shuddering, collapsing, etc.

in those moments, and in the quiet after when fjord confirms that he still has his powers, it finally hits him that yes, people can protect, fight, and love him for who he is alone. there is no chain or other shoe waiting to be dropped here. the wildmother is no uk’otoa, to punish or take power at a whim. caduceus will fight with everything he has and then some for fjord because he loves him (not for nothing does fjord only realizes the depths of jester’s feelings when she uses heal on him). who are caduceus and fjord to each other? they are people who will fight for one another and the others as far as they can. fjord says over and over again that he wants to protect the nein and look out for them because he cares for them. he demonstrates it over and over again as well. caduceus says basically the same thing; he wants everyone safe and happily on their way and will stay until they are. he demonstrates this all the time as well. this is, i think, the first time that he demonstrates his dedication so unequivocally, free of the artifice of duty, fully committed through love. fjord recognizes this in caduceus and caduceus does in fjord.

i say this is a turning point because, while they don’t really have another super in depth conversation alone together, these two start clocking each other and openly help and look out for each other. there’s an ease and intimacy to the relationship after this. fjord watching caduceus swim near vokodo’s lair, fjord being ready to hand over his armor to caduceus when it looks like his won’t be ready, fjord, caduceus, and beau plotting behind jester’s back to keep her safe from the traveler, the absolute offense fjord takes to eadwulf after he spoke to caduceus like that, fjord levels up in paladin after caduceus tells him he’s proud to know him, all the way to the end of the show when fjord shelters the clerics and tells them to finish lucien, we get little moments like these from both of them. hell, caduceus is the first person in the campaign to tell fjord directly that he loves him.

[dendylabyrinth]

Kyoko for your character ask

I love my red hobo, so sure!

Why I like them

Kyoko is complex, she’s basically this jaded softie who pretends as if she’s a cold-hearted asshole. But she’s also got some principles. Like she will help if someone needs it, even if she complains while doing so. Doesn’t hurt that she can be snarky like hell. Homecoming was really amazing for her character. It reminded me of all the things I like about Kyoko. Seeing her realize how much she ‘strayed’ from her principles now that she has gone through so much with everyone in the game’s story was really interesting. And how it addressed her regrets about Momo was just… (what’s the sad version of a chef’s kiss?). It even made some parallels between Kyoko and her father, how, same as he gave up and abandoned everything, she abandons anything that hurts her (Mami, her past, wish, etc) Homecoming is one those events worth checking out even if you’re not into Magia Record, it’s that good. Kyoko is complicated, but at her core, she’s definitely good.

Why I don’t

She can be really uninvested in what’s going on. But I get it, she’s the type who does her own thing and would prefer not to get involved with other people because of what happened with her family and Mami.

At least she’s way too much of a softie to leave people burning in the wreckage of whatever shit she pulls off.

Favorite scene

Honestly? All of Homecoming was really good. If I had to pick though, I would say the parts where Kyoko starts to slowly become more and more vulnerable after she remembers that Momo is dead. Here’s an excerpt from the wiki’s summary:

Kyoko recaps her past and her wish, how she lost her magic; how Momo was so little, so innocent, someone Kyoko had to protect - and failed at doing so miserably.

After Kyoko returns to her father’s church to reflect on the foundation of her principles, she leaves just as confused as before she went. She walks in the snow with Momo. Even though she knows by that point that Momo is dead and this one is just an illusion of some kind, that Momo didn’t disappear, seemingly because Kyoko regrets not being able to save her that much, so her desire to have Momo with her makes her accept even an illusion (which is really ironic considering her lost illusion magic). Sayaka shows up and calls out to Kyoko, but she doesn’t respond, she just whispers Momo’s name and continues to walk away. Sayaka, meanwhile, starts to get worried. This scene speaks so much about Kyoko’s character, exploring new aspects alongside the stuff we have already seen. Kyoko was never seen really talking about regrets. Sure, she does talk about her wish causing her family to break, but the way she talks about it is more of in the style of ‘cause and effect’. Don’t get me wrong, she definitely is harboring regrets over it, but it’s more on brand for Kyoko to bury whatever haunts her after deciding to live for herself. So getting to see her feel so vulnerable and honest about her regrets strikes such a strong note for how I perceived her before. The setup being a dreamworld that will end in 3 days forces Kyoko to face whatever she is burying, especially now that she has Momo back.

Also, it’s pretty sweet seeing how Kyoko acts when Momo is with her: always asking her what she thinks, if she wants Kyoko to help that person, and her being generally less abrasive because she has Momo is really sad in retrospect.

Favorite line

I like this line of thought she has in Homecoming:

‘A happy ending, huh… Even though I believe there ain't no such thing... ...as a story where love and courage overcome all, does all this mean… ...that in the end, I still haven't given up on my dumbass hope that I can save people?’

Hearing her taking a good look of herself and what she’s really burying deep down is pretty heavy, knowing what she usually preaches.

Favorite outfit

Her winter clothes are really good! The aesthetic choice of stepping away from red for once works, because this color combo looks really good. Bonus points for practicality since it looks warm.

Gotta include her doppel alt. Those colors? She looks so cool! I really appreciate the detail that her hair is like Momo’s, adds a touch of SOB to the whole thing.

OTP

Listen, I offer Sayaka. I also will offer an explanation for all your ‘blah!’s. People who ship Kyoko and Sayaka usually skip out on Magia Record since the Sayaka there is ‘the straight one’, in which case, you people must have some weakass vision because the ship material IS there, you’re just still riding the rebellion high. Which, fair, the moment they had was sweet, but do keep in mind that that Sayaka was a Sayaka who got a bunch of other Sayakas’ memories in her, so Kyoko’s gayness had to be that obvious by that point (getting to see that gay as hell couple’s suicide numerous times might as well have awakened the bi in her). But in Magia Record? The two are really what I would imagine normal, non-ascension involved, Sayaka and Kyoko shippy moments to be: Kyoko being an ass towards Sayaka but not really at the same time, and Sayaka being suprised by whatever new side she sees in Kyoko. Want proof you non-believers? Look no further than Surfing Sayaka’s event, which is coincidentally being rerun right now: Nacht Marchen (Night Fairytale). The story is that Sayaka gets involved in a decades old tale when she finds a magical toy robot that comes to life called Ponta, who’s looking for something related to a ‘voice of the waves’ that’s been going around. When Sayaka learns that owner of the villa where they have been staying had an accident that happened to her 50 years ago reversed by her best friend making a wish, she and Kyoko have to face the dilemma of whether they should tell her about that wish (the girl died in a labyrinth long ago without anyone knowing). While Sayaka doesn’t know what to say, Kyoko, after being quiet, surprisingly jumps in and tells the villa owner that her friend wished for a miracle for the owner’s sake, even if she doesn’t believe them. But the villa owner thanks Kyoko for telling her. Later that night, Sayaka finds Kyoko awake and they talk about whether letting someone know that you made a miracle happen for their sake is okay. I really love this conversation, as it really shows how they share this common point where they understand each other, which creates a whole different vibe from their usual squabbling. Here’s a summary of said moment by MochiDDR:

Kyouko says that even if you tell someone, it doesn't mean they'll believe you, and even if they believe you, it doesn't mean they'll be happy. Just because you make a wish for someone doesn't mean they would have wanted it, and that becoming a mahou shoujo means the price you have to pay is to keep your wish a secret to them. Kyouko asks Sayaka what's wrong, she replies that she made the same wish as Misa. Kyouko asks her if she regrets her wish, Sayaka says she doesn't.

An interesting point to add is that Kyoko’s appearance in the event gets a lot of build, so much so that she only shows up in the later half of the story. There’s also this scene where Sayaka is about to go surfing with Ponta to help him find what he’s looking for when she notices that Kyoko bailed on her. And when Sayaka needs some help taking out a witch before the magic cast on Ponta fades, who shows up all decked out in her magical swimsuit?

And I already talked about Homecoming, so the defense rests their case.

Brotp

Nagisa straight up, the two got the same ‘I would rob a bank for munchies’ vibe. Kyoko even remembers that Nagisa worships cheese and gets her a cheese-flavored snack that she likes in Valentine Nagisa’s event, The Mirror World Chocolatier (but since she was in chocolate mode, Nagisa’s like ‘Girl what?’). The two probably hang out when everyone else is at school.

Head Canon

She does some nice stuff like help old ladies cross the street but would die if anyone she knew saw her.

Unpopular opinion

I like abrasive Kyoko. I mentioned this before, but I prefer how they are in the game’s story over their characters in Rebellion, because I don’t see it as a setback at all. It’s different, more normal circumstances that don’t include rescuing your god/boss/bestie’s ex from a prison of her own making, sponsored by that one demon cat who screwed you over, like, a thousand of times…. Oh hey, that one girl who kept killing herself alongside your corrupt soul is here too, huh.

Oh wait, I was supposed to talk about Kyoko, not Sayaka. Uhh, reverse what I just said! Replace the divine stuff with that one girl you were gay for who died but now is back and is now open for business for some reason. Whew, saved it!

A wish 

Listen, I understand we just got some premium Kyoko content, like top shelf stuff. So that’s why I will direct this wish more towards the future, okay? Okay: lemme see a Kyoko and Sayaka duo soon, I need that potential realized.

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen

I honestly don’t have much to say. I like how they have been handling her character, so nothing pops up in terms of bad turns they could take in regards to her writing.

5 words to best describe them

Lamenting, hungry, gay, softie, rough

My nickname for them

Nada.

[readerstories]

Whatever We Want - Hannibal Lecter x gn!reader

Made it gender neutral because I could and gender doesn’t really come into the fic. I tried to go for smut, but got stuck, so just some light fluff this time. If you see any typos, please tell me. (AO3)

Warnings: none

Wordcount: 1468

Request: hi there! can you please do a Hannibal x reader? Preferably smut however if you just want fluff thats okay too! The reader is a patient of his and after awhile of therapy sessions and learning more about each other, he makes a move. she intrigues him and is intelligent and kind but dark like him. except not a cannibal (yet lol)

Going to therapy had been a hard choice for you. You’re a private person and think people should keep out of your business as much as possible, thank you very much.

But that, being said, you had realized you probably needed it, or at least something. Punching a mirror in a weak moment had made you seek something out.

So you had researched therapists near you, eventually finding one you thought might not be too bad.

To your surprise, you actually end up liking going there. Dr. Lecter is a well mannered and polite man with some dry humor which he sometimes lets shine through in your sessions. He’s not boring like you thought, instead well read in many disciplines and facets of life, and enjoys the finer things in life, like the tailored suits he always wears, giving your eye something nice as well as your mind.

He lets you ramble and talk about just about anything, sometimes listening, sometimes talking more than you when you are in a foul mood. He’s good at what he does, giving you the illusion of controlling where the sessions go, but you catch on after a few sessions. You joke about it some, (”Is this where you diagnose me with daddy issues Dr. Lecter?” A movement that can barely be called a smile and a huff of air the closest thing you have heard to a laughter from him. “I am not.”), but over time you grow into it, letting him do so.

It helps that you find him interesting and good to look at, so he has no problems in keeping you attentive when you meet. It would be a lie to say that you hadn’t thought about him in other settings. But you had let them go, not wanting to push for something you can’t get.

Which is why, when Hannibal invites you over for dinner one day, he is met with surprised silence over the phone for a few seconds before you gather yourself and say yes to his invitation.

The next evening, at 6 pm sharp, you ring the doorbell of his house while trying to squash the butterflies fluttering to life in your stomach.

Steady footsteps behind the door, and then it’s opened by Hannibal. He’s not smiling, not that you expected him to, but the look on his face is kind. You hand over the blue hydrangeas you had been holding.

“I would have gotten some wine, but I know your taste is better than mine, so I did this instead.”

“Thank you. Come in.” Still ever so polite, Dr. Lecter holds the door open for you as you step inside.

“I find that flowers have a calming effect as well as bringing more life to a room. Please make yourself comfortable while I find a vase for these wonderful points of life.” Hannibal walks down a hallway and you start to take a look around.

The decor and furnishing clearly speaks to a man living alone, but it is as classy and stylish, but yet very on trend as the man you just gave flowers to.

You had debated over what to bring for longer than you would care to admit, unsure what to make of the situation you find yourself in. You wonder what Hannibal had meant by inviting you over for dinner like this.

You are brought out of your musing by approaching steps. Hannibal appears with the flowers in a simple black vase, setting them down on the nearest flat surface before looking at you.

“If you will join me in the dining room, dinner is ready.” You nod, following him into yet another stylish room. The dinner table is long and surrounded by many chairs, clearly able to host a larger gathering of people if needed. But tonight there is only you and Dr. Lecter. He pulls out a chair for you when you get close, and you sit down, the neatly set table in front of you. Yet again he leaves you alone, going through what you assume is the way to the kitchen. Just a few minutes later he is back with plates with food, the smell of them making your mouth water. He sets them down carefully on the table before sitting down across from you.

You can’t help the question that finally tumbles from your lips.

“What is this Dr. Lecter?”

“It is called-” You hold up a hand, silencing him.

“Not the food, but this. Inviting me over for dinner, just the two of us alone.” A few beats of silence as you watch each other.

“It is whatever we want it to be.” He lets the word linger before speaking once more.

“You are one of the most interesting people I have ever met, so a dinner seemed only fitting to get to know each other better.” Your first thought is no, that is what you do in your therapy session, but no, that’s not really it is it? He knows you, but you don’t know much about him, other than that he is polite and looks very good in tailored suits.

“Very well Dr. Lecter.” A smile, the first proper one you have seen from him, however small.

“Please, call me Hannibal.” You smile back at him, glancing down at the food to avoid his gaze so he can’t see how flustered that little permission to use his first name had gotten you.

“But now I am actually curious, what is this wonderful dinner I see and smell before me?”

“The meat is-” and from here he launches into an explanation of the food and how he prepared it while he starts to eat. You mirror him, both continuing to eat while he explains, and then the conversation flows from there. You find it even easier and better to talk to him in a more casual setting like this, almost every sentence he speaks makes you more interested in the man.

He pours you both a glass of wine, and you toast to the health of the other, then continue talking. It’s an easy ebb and flow of words, neither of you running dry on what to say or where to next with your words.

You keep talking and drinking more wine all trough your dinner, and you keep talking while helping Hannibal clear away the dishes. You follow him into the kitchen, offering him to help him, but he thanks you no, saying that no guest of his should do dishes.

So instead you lean against the counter, looking over the kitchen while he does dishes, wineglass almost empty again. You take your last sip of it, setting it down on the counter next to the knife block behind your back.

“You have a rather large kitchen for one person.”

“I like to cook, sometimes for many people.” You hum, watching his back move through his white shirt, shamelessly looking now that he can’t see you.

“I gathered as much, and you are good at it too, I must say.”

“Thank you.” Hannibal almost catches you staring when he turns around, a chef knife in his hands. He steps toward you, and you know you are in his way so he can’t put the knife away, but you don’t move. He raises a brow, you tilt your head in response. Another few steps and he is very much in your personal space, the knife by his side now. He moves his arm ever so slowly up, the knife glinting briefly in the light before it goes behind your back.

You hear it slide into its place in the block, but pay it no mind, all your attention on Hannibal’s face now.

Pulling his arm back, it doesn’t go back at Hannibal’s side, instead his hand comes to at your hip. You lick your lips, his eyes following the motion, the silence in the room deafening.

He leans forward ever so slightly, and then, finally, his lips are on yours. They are firm, warm, and you are quick to respond. Kissing him back your own hands go around his neck, pulling him closer. Hannibal hums into the kiss, both of his hands on your hips now. His tongue comes out and you open your mouth to him, meeting him halfway there.

Hannibal kisses with a quiet, but solid, fierceness you perhaps hadn’t expected. So who are you to blame when your hand wanders down to tug him forward by his belt loop, sending a very clear message of what you want this to be.

Hannibal breaks the kiss but doesn’t go far, staying right where he is as he speaks.

“Is this what you want it to be?”

“Yes.” You whisper breathlessly and pull him back for another kiss with his tie.

[kallulovesu]

How would (any 2ps of your choice) react to their s/o escaping after they kidnapped them?

2p!Romano

No...! Oh no, dear lord! This couldn’t be happening!

Flavio couldn’t believe it— he simply couldn’t bring himself to. You were just there this morning; chained to the bedpost with no means of escaping as per usual. Nothing seemed even the tiniest bit wrong...even when he had left. So how? Why?

He made sure to make this mansion nearly impossible for you to escape through; keeping tight security around every single room and even going as far as placing guards around the house. Alas, his effort seemed to have ended up being for nothing once coming back home to an eerie silence that day, the comfort of your presence being gone.

Flavio wouldn’t be able to take it. He finally had you in his grasp after what felt like years of simply observing you from afar and planning to ‘take you home’. As cliché as it may sound— he felt empty without having you around. He felt empty without you in his arms, unable to hold you close to him while observing you. And so, the poor man would most likely start hyperventilating due to the pressure of it all. Tears streaming down his face, and calling your name over and over again as if that would be able to bring you back.

It wouldn’t be until someone finally noticed the ruckus in the mansion and came to check up on it that he’d finally be able to snap out of it, most likely by one of his guards— or more preferably, his brother. Of course, he wouldn’t be able to...fully get over it, but just enough to try sucking it up and decide to stop whining and actually start looking for you. He couldn’t waste any more time. He needed you back this instant.

Flavio was well capable of doing it himself; with his skill and the many connections and that he had. But he also recognized that asking Luciano for help would quicken the whole process of finding you, so he immediately went towards his...unsettling brother for help.

Flavio truly didn’t want to do this, but if you were just going to be— this ungrateful towards him and even dare to escape then he’d have to go through with his plan of actually locking you up in a cage.

2p!America

I’m not even going to sugar coat it— you fucked up. You fucked up big time.

Allen is beyond pissed, if you couldn’t notice. For one; how dare you run away from him? After all of the care he gave you, after all the effort he put into kidnapping you...this is how you pay him back? By running away from your ‘boyfriend’, and leaving him all alone again?

He was usually a patient man when it came to you; putting up with your behavior despite the many times you disobeyed him, or the constant pleading about going back home. Really, he could wait centuries until you’d finally recognize that the two of you were truly made for each other. But this... god, what the fuck where you thinking?

Didn’t you know that it was dangerous out there without him? Who knows what kind of disgusting person could be roaming around, ready to take you away and— his stomach churned at the thought of whatever the possible outcome could be. You were weak, helpless even...so you wouldn’t be able to defend yourself if such a thing truly were to happen.

Allen was a selfish man, yes. The reason of your kidnapping was mainly for his own comfort and pleasures— but he also cared about your safety. Which could very well be in danger at this exact moment. And so, the first thing he’d do after collecting his thoughts would immediately be hunting you down; he already knew you like the back of his hand, so it would most likely end up being a rather fast process.

2p!Japan

Huh. He didn’t actually think you’d do it.

Kuro was a bit shocked at first, really. A sweet, yet foolish darling such as yourself actually managing to escape? Even with the many security he had around his house? He couldn’t help but be rather impressed, seeing that he had underestimated you greatly.

He had already suspected you plotting something behind his back; perhaps an escape, or maybe even an attack towards him— though he payed it no mind. Victims of kidnapping were always a bit...rebellious at first, no? So it was better to pay it no mind since you’d most likely get over it in a day or two. (Well that ended up backfiring HARD on him,)

After all, it was nearly impossible for you to get away from him, being nothing more than a mere human against a country like him. So what were the chances of your plan actually succeeding? Surprisingly high, seeing that you were actually gone right now.

The man wasn’t really...mad, per se; perhaps just a tad bit annoyed at the fact that you hadn’t changed and were still reluctant on staying with him.

It would take some time, perhaps a week or so before he’ll actually go and get you back. Kuro wanted to test if he had trained you well enough, and that maybe you’d surrender yourself without any conflict. Alas, it seemed that you really were adamant on being away from him.

Oh, at least this gave him an excuse to punish you once getting you back again, so it ended up not being so bad after all. :)

2p!China

Oh wow. You actually managed to escape.

...

Wait— huh? You escaped? When did you even...how even?

It would take him a minute or two before finally being able to actually grasp the situation before him. Zao thought that it was an illusion at first, merely something that his mind had made up because of the drugs he had used just a few hours ago— before it all slowly dawned upon him at once. You were actually gone.

He had a small suspicion that something like this would end up happening; after all, you were acting rather strange these past few days— letting him do whatever he wanted with you without protest and any slaps to the cheek, or the way you would even return his affection. Zao truly did want to believe that you had actually changed your mind for the better, that you had started slowly loving him back...but you were never that easy, were you?

But that was fine. He liked that about you. How you rebelled against him and used your knowledge (and his ignorance) to your advantage. It differentiates you from the others he had tried going after in his life— and it reminded him of why he fell in love with you in the first place.

Of course...he had to find you eventually. though Zao didn’t worry that much about it, really. He knew you enough to predict where you would go once escaping from his grasp, but he wanted to...toy with you a bit. Letting you think that you were actually able outsmart him; before casually showing up at the place you were residing in at that moment, and taking you back home with him. Where you belonged.

[canyouhearthelight]

The Miys, Ch. 154

Happy Tuesday, everyone!

I was able to get the Master Post cleaned up this morning.  I know there is a reblog going around with some of the links missing... I put that one up originally as a place holder so I could update my page links in chapters 101 through this one.   I did NOT anticipate it would get immediately reblogged, which made me squeak in pleasant surprise.  I’ll reblog the full post so everyone has the right one.

Also, thanks to @baelpenrose, @the-raven-fae, and @charlylimph-blog for keeping me going and all your help beta-reading and checking my links.  You three are the real heroes here!

“The quiet rooms are done,” Hannah yawned the next morning. “It’s a good thing we decided to make them available immediately, because the first one had people scheduling time before we finished the second one.”

“How many did we end up with?” I asked, pushing down my own urge to yawn. I had always prided myself on being able to resist the urge to yawn when others did, and I wasn’t letting that stop now.

The model of the Ark came up on the table emitter, and Hannah zoomed in on the highlighted areas. “Right now, we have twelve, just like you set up for the second Food Festival. But I’ll be honest, they rooms are already booked for the foreseeable future, and I don’t think that’s tenable.”

“Agreed. I’ll talk to the rest of the Council, but at this point, we need to see about setting all available spaces for quiet rooms.” I nodded and added that note to my agenda. “Moving on, food vendors being allowed in BioLab2. Any updates?”

Parvati flicked the data to everyone. “Grey isn’t thrilled with the possibility that the food will contaminate the aquatics, but is willing to allow vendors in ‘The Fairy Circle’?” She gave me a questioning look. “They said you would know what that meant.”

I just smiled and shook my head. “It’s where I go camping. Conor managed to pull off a prank that fooled even Charly and made a Faerie circle.  It’s a good choice, though: ten, eleven feet across, accessible, and far enough from the water that there wouldn’t be any risk.”

She rolled her eyes and smiled. “Credit to Conor on that one. But, Grey was very enthusiastic about the idea of setting up some picnic tables throughout the woods and letting people bring picnics.”

“I already have some vendors on board, there,” I breathed in relief. “Especially the ones who specialize in the type of foods that lend themselves well to being portable.”

Hannah’s face lit up. “Do we get to taste test some of these? I’m really getting some bento box and pasty vibes from what you just said, and I’m not sure which I’m more excited about.”

“I think I can get that to happen,” I laughed. “I wouldn’t mind trying some of the options myself, but I can at least already confirm that all bases are covered for dietary requirements. Next up, where are we on the holiday date?”

“Still working with the other departments to finalize a date where all projects can be completed, paused, or at least at a point where they don’t require direct observation. Everyone is on board, though.”

“That’s the biggest hurdle,” I confirmed. “Means we can proceed with at least putting the rest of the events together in preparation for the final date. I trust you two in handling the party aspect of it, and Charly is already working Bash on another Kink Night event at the Undine - minimal planning needed there. So, let’s figure out who is coordinating the paint-tag fight, and we can loop back to the plans for the party.”

“While I am entirely sure Charly can handle planning for both the paint tag and the other - seeing as both were her ideas - it doesn’t feel fair to leave them both entirely on her shoulders,” Hannah agreed. “It says here that you already had Conor confirm we missed Holi?

“By about six months,” I confessed. “So we’re pretty much both too late and too early.”

“I do believe the arrows would be frowned upon, in any event,” Parvati joked. “I still have her paint formulas - flavors are not listed, but there is a distinct lack of both black and yellow.”

“Those were… scotch bonnet for the black, I know that one. I think the yellow was gochujang, which would still hurt if you got it in your eyes,” I recalled.

She flicked her hands, bracelets chiming. “I will ask for a new formula for yellow, but I think we can live without black paint. The yellow was lovely, though.”

“Ask nicely, and she’ll probably give you the glitter formula colors, which I think are different flavors from the regular palette,” I suggested. “And the glitter is ultra-violet reactive, so that’ll be fun.”

Emphatic stabbing at her datapad ensued - impressive, because it wasn’t even physically there, just emitted from the band on her wrist. “Once I have those, I believe Hannah and I can coordinate that along with the party.  There is no food component, it is only for one day, so the scope is far smaller than the Festival was.”

“And besides,” Hannah added with a shrug, “whip up some paints and some spongy balls to soak it up, set boundaries, invite anyone who wants to attend. Planning done.” She dusted her hands off for emphasis, but she had a point.

“I’ve got the care packages well underway, so we’re solid there. The party. What’s the plan there?”

Parvati dismissed the schematic from the table emitter and sent a different image to it. This one was practically the opposite of what I had expected: where I had anticipated Food Festival 2: Pyrotechnic Boogaloo, I was instead looking at a park that I was reasonably certain only existed in dreams.

Soft green grass that my toes wiggled to touch spanned a rolling, looping thoroughfare. Trees arched overhead like an arbor, and were either woven with lights are absolutely covered in fireflies.  Between breaks in the canopy, a night sky filled with more stars than I had seen in my living memory.  Here and there small braziers burned brightly with fire, resting on sturdy rugs and dotted around with cushions.

“Vati,” I whispered hoarsely. “We can’t use BioLab2 for this, can we? Will Grey allow it?”

“We can, and they are.” Her smile was the feral one that usually preceded a coup de grace of event planning. “This, however, is not BioLab2.  This is the corridors of levels twelve through fourteen, leading into the lab.”

My first urge was to guess what she was planning, but my mind came up blank. I circled around my desk to stand closer to the table. “Okay, talk to me. Make it make sense.”

She nodded. “The grass is real, laid down like sod. The terraforming teams have agreed to let us use it, provided we allow them to collect data on how it holds up to so much foot traffic and include a post-event question regarding the tactile feel on bare feet.  So, bare feet they shall have.” She winked when I realized she and Hannah were going to make it part of the theme. “The trees are an illusion, simple light emitters against the corridor walls, combined with the existing texture of the surface.”

When she moved the image to mimic walking further down the path, Hannah picked up. “The larger spaces are actually where the corridors are longer between quiet rooms. Rather than trying to pull off the tree illusion, we’re going to create a  night sky with shooting stars, comets, the works.  Like a dream.”

“I like it. It’s not what I was expecting, but I’m even more impressed for that.”

“We couldn’t compete with Charly,” Parvati confessed. “She is already going to have our base desires covered.  Anything we tried to do would look like a pale imitation. So, we went the other direction: What else do we do to feel alive?”

“We dream,” I laughed. “It’s all a fairy tale dream, isn’t it?”

“That’s the goal,” Hannah confirmed. “A beautiful dream. One day and one night where you can live out your humanity however you want, without having to compromise.  If someone wants to throw paint with childish abandon, then stroll and dance through a dream, and finish the night at the Undine trying something they never dared to do before, they can do that.”

“When you put it like that, it sounds decadent.”

“I was going for hedonistic, over all, but you’re on the right track,” Parvati laughed. “Hannah and I agreed that everyone on the Ark needed one perfect day.  And since perfect is different for everyone…” She shrugged. “We just decided to give them all the options.  The quiet rooms will be open if their perfect includes a botanical garden, or a cloud… the mess halls will be open if it means a feast, or even just decadent hors d'oeuvres they could never make an excuse to try. It’s literally all on the table.”

“Consider it signed off on.” I still couldn’t take my eyes off that grass, toes wiggling happily. “Just let me know the date when we have one, I need a pedicure to enjoy this completely.”

<< Prev  Masterlist  Next >>

[obsidian-chika]

Zhongli x Male Reader

✼ •• ┈┈┈┈๑⋅⋯ ୨˚୧ ⋯⋅๑┈┈┈┈ •• ✼

𝗖𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗢𝗻𝗲

┲━━━━━━━━━━━━━━┱

𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞 . . .

┺━━━━━━━━━━━━━━┹

✼ •• ┈┈┈┈๑⋅⋯ ୨˚୧ ⋯⋅๑┈┈┈┈ •• ✼

It was a typical day in Liyue Harbor. The sun was out, shining down on the people. The breeze of the sea circulating through the harbor. People working, families spending time with each other. The atmosphere seem warm and welcoming to any new comers.

Not everything is as it seems to be. There was a darker part of the harbor. After many centuries after Rex Lapis's death, along with Osial's resurrection and defeat, there was a ceremony. Being performed due to a sprit that haunted the Golden House. It was rumored that the spirit is the ghost of Rex Lapis. The spirit haunted the place according to locals.

Families feared for the lives of their children. Male or female, if the name of a family was chosen, they needed to have one out of all their children to be the bride or groom for the spirit. Families with one child feared that part the most. Anyone that was married off in the ceremony, never came back out, alive.

✼ •• ┈┈┈┈๑⋅⋯ ୨˚୧ ⋯⋅๑┈┈┈┈ •• ✼

There was a boy. His family was great when looked at by other people in the harbor. Well manner, kind, giving, caring, but the never knew how things were behind the doors. Ruthless parents. They were strict with every aspect, if anything was done against them, a beating was in for the child.

There was also favoritism. All the other siblings were favored over (M/n). His parents thought of him as a disgrace to the family name, an unwanted child, a mistake. Some of his elder siblings payed no mind because in their household, no one had more power than the parents. If their parents said something, it was to go through and happen, or else there will be consequences for disobedience behavior.

Even if they pitied the younger sibling, nothing could be done. Even the servants pitied him, but nothing could be helped. Their parents ruled everything. No one could step out of line without punishment. He wanted comfort, but could not seek comfort. Being kept in the darkness most of his life. Constantly being put down by his parents.

Nothing. No one. Lonely and isolated, he lived. No matter what he did to try and please his parents, nothing worked. They never seemed satisfied with his efforts. Whether it was his studies, or helping others. Even with his advanced arts in using the lance (pole arm) at the age of 10 and his catalyst abilities he soon developed, nothing. He was nothing in their eyes, only a waste that needs to be kept to uphold their image.

✼ •• ┈┈┈┈๑⋅⋯ ୨˚୧ ⋯⋅๑┈┈┈┈ •• ✼

Not too long after passing the age of 13, he stopped all efforts to try and please his so call parents. His only goal now was to working for himself. For the things he can do in the future without being bother and judged.

He also did something that would ruin the image of his parents if his deeds were ever found out. No doubt he would get a terrible beating from them if they knew.

He also felt an odd attraction to a place. A place everyone feared. Pronouncing the place as haunted with the spirit of Rex Lapis. During late hours of the night, where shops were closed, families spending time with each other, and people retiring for the night. All except one, he made sure that it seemed like he was sleeping. Sometimes for extra caution, he would make a water illusion before leaving home.

Sneaking off to the Golden House became more normal as he grew. His parents' attitude towards him never changed for the better. His siblings and servants can only watch as he grows more stoic, while the people love him but question why he's like that with such great and loving parents.

He would spend late hours of the night at the Golden House. There was so much mora in the place, but he never wanted it. He only there for the feeling of comfort it gave it. A break from his so called lovely household. Some of the servants have caught and seen him sneak out at late hours, but said nothing. They would cover for him if his parents ever asked why he wasn't at breakfast in the morning. Saying that he headed out early for commissions or to help around the harbor. He was very surprised to find out they covered for him sneaking out, but nonetheless he was grateful to them for having his back when he didn't return for the night.

There were days where he spend all his time at the Golden House. It also satisfied him being there. Reading, sleeping, honing his skills in the arts, planning out future adventures and explorations. Any time spent there was treasured deeply by the young male. Even if the place was haunted like what the people have said, he didn't care. It made him feel safe and at peace, which was all he ever wanted.

✼ •• ┈┈┈┈๑⋅⋯ ୨˚୧ ⋯⋅๑┈┈┈┈ •• ✼

Tonight was like most nights. Heading out for the night, towards the Golden House. He easily slipped pass the guards, hiding in the shadows and using one of his elemental abilities to travel as water. Appearing inside of the place, he lets out a sigh of content and happiness. Heading to the center back of the place, dropping his bag, along with taking a seat on the floor right after.

He stared out at his surroundings. As if it was his first time in the forbidden place. Pulling out a book he borrowed, he focused his attention on it. Enjoying the peaceful atmosphere of the place. While reading, one of his hands held the book while the other took hold of his vision. He always wondered about his vision and it's element of choice.

He never minded being able to manipulate hydro, he just wondered why he even had a vision. He never thought of his actions as impressive, helping, or achieving in any way. Always seeing his actions as average or not even enough, he sought out to help people around the harbor because he couldn't seem to please his parents. Helping around the harbor gave his a better sense of freedom from his restricted household.

Finishing up a chapter, he set the book down. Standing up to stretch, he summoned his lance. Practice. Train. Get stronger. Be better. He always said those things to himself. Always wanting to improve. Testing and pushing his limits. People in the harbor truly admired the young boy. Helping around the harbor, yet still being able to hone his own abilities, skills, and talents to the max.

With heavy breaths, he put the spear away. Slowly regaining his breathe, he looked around. The golden color of the place. The casing of Rex Lapis close to where all his belongings were. Feeling the design of the pillar he was next to. The design of the place always was something that fascinated him. It was beautiful in his eyes. No matter what people said about the place, he will always love it. Even if he died, this place did him better than his home.

✼ •• ┈┈┈┈๑⋅⋯ ୨˚୧ ⋯⋅๑┈┈┈┈ •• ✼

Picking up his book once again, he resumed his reading. Slowly getting tired, and falling asleep while leaning on one of the pillars. Soundlessly asleep he was as someone watched him. Never knowing about their presence, but they knew about him. Watching him through the years after the first time he entered the place. Never in a million years did they think someone would come to the place as an escape from home, instead of being the one chosen as the ghost bride or groom.

This person would listen to the male while he rambled on about his life, thinking no one was in there with him. This person wasn't really a person. They were a spirit, also known as a ghost. They're the ghost of the deceased Geo Archon, Rex Lapis. His spirit never fully left, as for the reason in doing so, even he doesn't not know. See the civilization change as a spirit was something interesting to him.

Not knowing what he can do for the male, he watched the male grow as time passed. Listening to the said male when he talked to himself, discussing the events that happened, or something that's on his mind. He didn't want to leave this world just yet. Wanting to wait till the male grew a bit older, or got married. He watched the male, and waited.

𝐖𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 ⨾

𝐖𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 ⨾

✼ •• ┈┈┈┈๑⋅⋯ ୨˚୧ ⋯⋅๑┈┈┈┈ •• ✼

As rain started to fall, that time of the year slowly approached the people of Liyue.

Parents hoping their children won't be the ones to be sent off.

The ceremony was soon to begin for the people.

No matter where that are, what the family does, if they were chosen, they would have to be sent off.

No one could run away from it.

As much as some families have pleaded in the past, the outcome was all the same.

Sent off with nothing to return with beside a corpse of the chosen.

✼ •• ┈┈┈┈๑⋅⋯ ୨˚୧ ⋯⋅๑┈┈┈┈ •• ✼

Thanks for reading, hoped you enjoyed.

See you next time.

[twatshag]

♤ Sakusa kiyoomi's night terrors ♤

Unfaithful. Oh it was just a dream. But why did it feel so real...

Genre: fluff to angst and then back to fluff, smut

Pairing: TIMESKIP both characters!!!!!sakusa x fem reader (in dream atsumu X READER)

Warnings: smut in dream, you cheating in the dream (you wrong for dat sis😩)

M DNI!!!

HIS POV small glimpse of your pov as well

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What a day. I sighed looking at the clock it was only 5 pm. Y/n was going to be here at 8 pm. I cleaned and already bought groceries for dinner.

I'm quite satisfied with how things looked around the apartment. As of lately y/n decided to bring me some plants and decorations everytime she visited, because in her opinion my apartment looked lifeless and bland.

I smiled softly thinking about tonight. I'm going to ask her to move in with me today. I mean I hope she doesnt mind. Maybe she'll be taken back by my sudden request or oh god what if she rejects me.. ?

I gulped trying to focus on the show I was watching and pushing back all the negative outcomes. She told me about this show during one of our phone calls and told me that I'd definitely enjoy it. She knows me so well, god I can't wait to tell her how much I appreciate her today.

As of lately I've been gathering up the courage to finally tell her that I'm ready to have intercourse with her. She's been so loving and patient this whole time I can't imagine how sweet she is for waiting up 6 months for me. I couldn't imagine if there was anyone who'd be so willing to respect my very picky boundaries but there she was.

I can't help but think about how it would feel for me and her being so close together. And becoming one. I blushed deeply at the thought. After all there Is one benefit of her not living with me.

That's not seeing me blush like this tsk. I bet she'd give me that smug smile and ask if I'm okay. I rolled my eyes thinking about her smug smile.

I never really asked if she's had.. intercourse with someone before. What if I wasn't good enough to satisfy her expectations..? What if.. she rejects my offer? What if I hurt her during it ? Oh god I don't want that. My head plagued me with bad thoughts about the idea of trying to satisfy her and failing miserably.

Y/n is absolutely gorgeous, all my team mates seem to love her and hell I really hate the way that stupid setter of a team mate looks at her.

I can't help but get jealous because she seems so comfortable with him. Sometimes I even find myself comparing the alternative realities of her being with him instead.

He's easy going has no stupid boundaries and he probably has a ton of experience to satisfy her.. my heart clenched at the thought of her leaving me for him.

I pushed those thoughts back once again. I looked at the clock it read 5:30 pm. Maybe I can dose off and when she comes around I'll tell her everything that's on my mind. I can't keep on post poning things.

I closed my eyes long forgotten about the show playing in the background as I waited for her.

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My eyes shot open as I heard muffled sounds in my apartment. Just what the hell was that?

I groaned as I sat up and looked at the clock it read 6:50 pm. Could she have arrived early?

The sounds were coming from the bedroom I smiled softly as I heard her beautiful voice. A voice that's so gentle when talking to me, so soft when she notices the way I slump from a long day of practice. Everything I've ever wanted in a woman. Was mine to keep and cherish.

I peeked through the crack and I noticed someone hovering over the bed. Smiling I opened it more to see what she was doing.

"Oh god yes yes tsumu right there." I felt my heart rip out of my chest. There she laid in my own apartment,in my own bed. With him. On top of her kissing her neck and thrusting into her.

She clung to him harder than she's ever clung to me.

Her mouth hung open and the so beautiful voice was now a curse I was hearing.

He kissed her neck hungrily.

"Ya feel so good angel-so fucking good." He quickened his pace while kissing her disgustingly his tongue gracing her so beautiful skin and infecting it. "Tsumu- aghnn mmhm yes-God fuck yes- yes y-ea-s." I wanted to scream, to move and tear them apart, to burn the whole apartment down hell even to avert my eyes but I couldn't.

Everything I've loved sat there being caressed by another man. That man was not me.

That man was someone better than I'll ever be.

Her gaze fell on me. Tears perked up my eyes looking at her stone lust filled eyes.

She gave me a smug smile.. That smug smile that was always so playfully displayed looked much darker than ever. No hint of playfulness or mercy. No hint of fake innocence as it once had.

"You've always been such a burden sakusa." I flinched at her tone and the mention of my last name, while that man was kissing her neck hungirly, thrusting into her as if I wasn't even there to begin with. That I ceased to exist in his world as of now.

Everything went silent for a moment, her whimpers became muted from the way the faux blonde thrusted into her as she spoke the next words.

"I never loved you. Sakusa. Me and you both know that atsumu was always the righteous man for me. You good for nothing replaceable freak."

And with that I was pushed back into the sofa my eyes shot open as I stared at her face above me cheeks flushed red from her shower she looked so beautiful but my heart it ached from what I saw. Did he see her like this too? She shrieked and stepped back.

"jesus christ kiyo! What the hell ?! are you psychic? I was about to wake you up!"

Kiyo... a name she always called me when things were serious. But the worry and softness that concealed her voice was not enough for me to accept what I just saw as an illusion.

I stood up pushing past her acting like she's not even there. I despised her existence with all my heart yet I can't help but repeat those words in my head. She's right I am replaceable. I'm a freak and I'll never be able to find love.

"Hey what the hell?! I'm talking to you, you know mister sleepy head!" She followed me into the kitchen trying to get me to talk to her, god her presence made me want to vomit.

I grabbed a glass and poured water into it and as I began to drink it to calm my nerve down before I lost my composure that was literally hanging by a thread right now.

I felt her hand on my back and to say the least i wanted nothing but to get her filthy hands and presence out of my life right now.

"Omi..what's wrong you kn-"

"Don't fucking touch me." I hissed, venom lacing my tone as I averted her gaze because seeing her made my heart clench.

Everything that I always wanted was in the arms of someone else. But why keep me around? Why hurt me like this?

I felt her staring at me wide eyed and from the corner of my eye I could see that she looked at her hand.

"I'm sorry are my hands di-"

"They're fucking filthy you disgusting bitch." This time I looked her in the eyes. Her eyes widened at my tone. She deserved it. She did this to herself what the hell was she expecting?

me to welcome her back after she just tore my heart apart ? After she was....with him? In my fucking bed? Infecting it and my life with the pain?

"Omi you don'-"

"Get out."

"W-what? Wh-"

"I SAID GET OUT!" I slammed my hand on the counter and she flinched "get the hell out of my apartment you filthy-" not even finishing my sentence I suddenly felt cold and wet

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YOUR POV

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If there's anything that life has taught me it's that whenever someone was angry DO NOT stay around them. For the sake of the both of you.

As I entered kiyoomi's apartment having a spare he was sleeping peacefully on the sofa making me smile softly. Deciding to leave him rest until I took my clothes off showering and then coming back to the living room to wake him up.

I couldn't help but notice that he was shuffling as if he was in pain i frowned and I decided to reach to shake him awake just as I was about to do so to my surprise he just jolted awake and now here we are.

He was being extremely mean and I think that I know what was going on he was shouting at me with a tone I've never recognised before.

The advise of leaving someone angry long left my mind and the glass of water now emptied in omi's face.

He stared at the ground with such pure anger and hate shocked that I had the nerve to even do such a thing after whatever the hell he saw or heard.

I sighed

"What ever dream y/n did just know that I'd never do to you. When you're ready to talk to me about it I'll be in your balcony. I'm sorry for.. throwing water in your face but you need to understand that I had no other choice." I scratched the back of my neck awkwardly putting the glass down on the counter in case he wanted to drink one more time before facing me. And with that I left and made my way to his balcony.

Whatever he saw must've hurt him deeply for him to react that way I thought I sat down looking at the beautiful sight of Tokyo breathing in its air smiling softly at the sounds of the lifeful city.

Whenever he's ready he'll come to me.

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Back to his pov

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She... threw water in my face. Suddenly I feel more awake. And guilty. God I feel so guilty. It was just a dream.

And I thought she'd... I have to fix this.

Panicking on how the hell i was going to word off 'sorry i had a dream where you cheated and I was so sure you did it so I screamed at you ' to her I filled the glass of water and drank it going into the bedroom sighing and letting a few tears spill while changing my wet shirt.

At times like this I'd truly begin to wish that I was like everyone else.

That I wasn't a very cautious man who was so blunt and had a comeback for everything but the man that could've made her life better.

I put on my slides and my hand hovered over my balcony door. Watching her city gaze smiling softly to herself.

At times where she would come over she always insisted on drinking coffee in my balcony at night.

At first it sounded so silly because I wouldn't get to sleep the whole night but instead i slept better and happier more fulfilled.

"Staring isn't nice you know?" Her sweet voice cut my train of memories and I opened the door clearing my throat.

God how awkward where the hell do I even begin to apologise i feel so guilty and dumb for even doubting you.

I sat next to her.

"You cheated on me.." she snapped her neck so fast it felt like it broke wide eyed. Before she could even speak I reassured "in my dream."Her expression softened she nodded listening to what I had to say.

"It felt so...real.. I walked onto you and atsumu.. and you told me that I'm a burden and you n-never loved me." I couldn't face her. I couldn't even look at her because of my ignorance and insecurities it truly was a pathetic sight for her to witness me this way.

Hot tears streamed down my face as I sniffiled.

"I know you always assure me that there's no need for me to be jealous or worry about him but it felt so real. I know that you'd be better of with someone who understood you better than I did. Act better than I did..hell even not doubt you because of something like this. "

my heart clenched at the next outcome. That being Her actually leaving me. I opened my mouth to speak only to be cut off by her "can I touch you?"

I looked at her nervously nodding like a small child as she pulled me into her arms hugging me while rubbing my back.

"I'd never dream of leaving you Kiyoomi. Yet alone be in someone else's arms.." I clung to her worried that if I didn't she'd leave me.

I cried softly against her repeating apologies while she rocked me.

"Hey hey Shh omi.. it's alright I know you didn't mean any of it. Besides I can't believe dream me cheated on you and with nasty ass atsumu out of all people" she fake gagged.

Making me laugh tearfully against her chest pulling away to look at her and she cupped my face in her hands making me look deeply in her so beautiful love filled eyes. Something dream her didnt have.

"There hasn't been a day that's passed where I don't thank god that you chose me out of everyone else omi. I'd be so stupid to throw away everything that you've given me." She smiled at me so sweetly it gave me toothache "i dont care if there are people out there who have no boundaries and arent afraid of germs and hell can touch me no matter what because those people arent you. I'd never ever lay in someone's elses arms kiyo..you're the one for me you know that right?" She looked back at me searching for a confirmation that I believed her so I nodded gently "It's always going to be you omi.. okay? I'm not going anywhere and you're stuck with me sadly." She giggled while a few tears were threatening to spill from her eyes my heart clenched this time because of her sweetness and care.

"I wouldn't mind being anywhere as long as it's with you y/n" I smiled at her as I brought my hand to her face and kissed her. The taste of her lips were always so intoxicating. So addictive.

And at that I knew it'll be okay. I loved her so much, with every muscle and bone in my body. But it was okay because so did she.

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"How do you want the pork chopped?" I looked at her from my counter while she confusingly stared at me "omi... I don't eat pork." Oops I forgot that. And now I'm embarrassed that I did. "O-oh yeah sorry." Fucking idiot.. I thought to myself.

She giggled and hugged me from behind and kissed my shoulder peeking from the sides watching me as I chopped the pork. Smiling at her so familiar warmth.

"No need to be embarrassed you're not the only one who forgets it all the time you know" I rolled my eyes at her observant habit still smiling at her warmth but I wont let her slide that easy so I'll tease her "says the big baby who's clinging onto me like a baby koalo." She giggled against my back sending shivers down my spine. "Yeah its your fault that you're so handsome and cuddly." I chuckled at her reasoning she hummed as if she was in thought. "Oh yeah, Omi you wanted to talk to me about something was it me cheating on you in your dream or something else ?" She teased.

I got a bit stiff At the thought of even asking her to move in with me. She backed away from me as I turned around.

"Y-yeah.." she raised an eyebrow at me "so which one is it?" She asked eagerly crossing her arms "I-uh,," why was this so freaking hard to ask I scratched the back of my neck avoiding her gaze. "Move in w-ith me...?" I mumbled softly I felt my face heat up as I attempted to ask her that half ass effort.

She smiled that one smug smile I loved to see so much but I'll never tell her that.

"Speak up I cant hear you omi" I rolled my eyes at her and turned my back continuing with chopping up the pork. "Guess you dont want to.." I mumbled earning a small gasp from her and to leech onto me from the side hugging me tightly "no no no sorry I heard you yes I'd love that, actually I've been dying to move in with you but I can't just ask hey I'm going to move in with you so make room for me in your closet" she giggled and kissed my cheek lovingly making me smile. I looked up at her as she smiled so hard at me teeth and everything. She leaned in to kiss me.

Now or never.

"I'm also ready to have sex with you." I moved away to the freezer to grab something I can make her leaving her hangingon thin air. She almost choked on nothing blushing immediately.

"YOU WHAT NOW??" I smirked at her loud voice and shock.

"Is chicken okay?" And now her face turned sour in disbelief. Possibly redder too.

"YOU CAN'T JUST ACT LIKE YOU DIDN'T JUST SAY THAT!"

"I guess chicken it is" I shrugged smirking at her.

"KIYOOOOOOMIIIII"

At the end of the day i always knew that home was always going to be right here with her around me. I'm one lucky man to have her around me. But I've hit bulls eye with her love for me.

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Kiyoomi made you chicken soup that day. And he decided that today was the day to give you his all let's just say.. his insecurities weren't right at all about him. Even saying that he totally satisfied you wasn't enough to describe the feeling you felt. Now sakusa has grown addicted to how you feel around him. My guy is whipped and extremely horny for you.

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A/N: I LITERSLLY FELL ASLEEP IN THE MIDDLE OF WRITING THIS AHAHAHAHA anyway I feel like this isn't my best work yet but I hope that you guys liked it ;(;( I feel like there's not enough his pov content so I decided to make it his pov also this isn't my best work so I'm sorryyyy im insecure rn pls I hope yall enjoyed this thank you so much for reading !!

-kira