#big brother lucifer

[luxthestrange]

Incorrect quotes#746 Big Bros

Lucifer in the celestial realm teaching mammon how to be a big brother...

Luci: Are you going to make sure nobody picks on your first baby brother?

Mam(7)*holding Leviathan's(3) hand* mhmm!, ye!

Luci: You're gonna stick up for him?~

Mam: Yeh-yeah!!

Luci: What is-What's the matter with him? Do you remember what its called?~

Mam: Anxe-anxi-anshi-...um*Pouts and looks down*

Luci: Anxiety?

Mam: Anxiety!*Gleams at Lucifer*

Luci: Yes~*Ruffling Mammon's head affectionatly*And if kids pick on your brother, what are you gonna do?

Mam:...

Mam: KILL THEM!!!

Levi*Sucking his thumb with a free hand, not understanding what their saying*Hehehee~Yu sho cwool bwig bwo!

--Present day-

Luci: Leviathan was the one to call mammon "Cool Big Bro" and made the other ones call him that too

Mc*Who is blowing nose into a kleenex,crying*Tell me more-

[journey-to-the-attic]

happy fnaf movie (uk) release day!

[goldenamaranthe-blog]

Jazzercise!: Hazbin Hotel

Buckle up, Buttercups! This one's long.

Charlie: (wearing a pair of pink leggings, rainbow sneakers, white exercise t-shirt, and a red sweatband around her head) Alright, Everyone! Today, we're going to be doing some team bonding exercises throoooough- Da-Dada-Daaaaaah! -Exercise!!!

Hazbins: (all groan in dismay and grumble and clamor in annoyance)

Angel: (wearing powder pink leg warmers and neon green leotard that looks like it came out of an 80s) Is there any way we can sit this out? Some of us are hungover.

Vaggie: (wearing a black and purple sports bra and black spandex shorts that cut off halfway down her thighs, hair tied up in a ponytail) Still? We celebrated the hotel's grand reopening last week.

Husker: (wearing your stereotypical gym teacher windbreaker pants but no shirt or jacket) The empty liquor wall at the bar will verify.

Lucifer: (magically appears wearing a pair of bright red, men's booty workout shorts from the 70s, white Dad sneakers with tall red socks, and a white and red sleeveless shirt tucked into the shorts) Well, I'm all for a little sweat and hard work! Whatcha got for us, kiddo?!

Charlie: Dad! (Averts her eyes) What are you wearing?!

Lucifer: What?! I wore this in my college days!

Angel: Oooooh! While I'm not complaining there, Short King, I don't think Charlie appreciates seeing the "King's Apple" lodged in your shorts.

Lucifer: Huh? (Looks down at the natural, indiscreet bulge in his shorts) ........But these shorts cup the boys so nicely.

Charlie: (about to puke like when she watched Angel's best porno during show and tell)

Vaggie: Babe, let's just focus on getting the workout done. Alright?

Charlie: OoOookay.... Um... Do you mind taking over? I actually have no idea what I'm doing.

Vaggie: (sparkle in her eye) Sure thing, babe. (Turns to the rest and squares her shoulders) Alright, we are going to start with two easy laps around the track followed by partner bear crawls for two hundred meters, thirty burpies, and ending with twenty inverted push-ups! Any questions?

Hazbins: (awkwardly glance at each other)

Niffty: (wearing a 50s style one piece workout suit) YAY!!! PAIN!!!

Vaggie: THEN MOVE!!!

-One Hour Later-

Hazbins: (moaning and groaning in agony as they lay defeated on the track)

Angel: (rolled out like a spider that got run over) Charlie..... Toots.....

Charlie: (gasping for breath as she falls to her knees and holds herself up on shaking arms) Yeah.... Angel?

Angel: (Looks over to Vaggie who is on her third iteration of bear crawls and using an equally dead Lucifer for weight) If this psychopathic bitch of a stamina monster brings this kind of energy to the bedroom, (wheezes and coughs) then I'll pray for your loins the next time you guys have sex.

Charlie: (panting as she rolls onto her back, too tired to even correct the inappropriate statement) Thank you, Angel. (Tilts her head up and leans on her elbows to watch Vaggie)

Vaggie: (finishes the bear crawls and drops Lucifer off with a jump) Thanks for being my partner, Sir. (Breaks into her burpees)

Lucifer: (wheezes through little spindles of smoke) No problem, Vaggie. Anytime. (To Charlie) What do you feed that girl?

Charlie: (watching Vaggie intently with a fresh blush not caused by exertion)

Angel: Charlie?

Charlie: (watches the muscles in Vaggie's thighs and shoulders work as she speeds through her burpees)

Lucifer: Chaaaaarlie? (Snaps fingers) Little Duckie, are you alright?

Charlie: (hearts beat in her eyes and Careless Whispers plays in the background somewhere as she watches Vaggie's leg, shoulder, and back muscles contract and flex under the duress)

Vaggie: (finishes her burpees and goes into a handstand, briefly getting her balance before starting her handstand push-ups)

Charlie: (watches a bead of sweat follow the contours of Vaggie's shoulder muscles and scars and drool starts dribbling down her chin) Angel.... I need that prayer now....

Angel: Huh? (Follows Charlie'sline of sight and groans in pain as he brings his hands up in prayer) Our Unholy Father of Debauchery, please see that this horny bitch's snatch makes it safely out of the upcoming pounding she is about to receive. May her holes be elastic and well lubricated to avoid tearing, her legs be flexible as they reach behind her head, her orgasms shake her very foundation, and the aftercare be filled with all the cutsey cuddling she can handle. Amen.

Charlie: (continues watching) I wanna climb her.

Lucifer: (awkwardly) Uhhhhh.... Vaggie's not a tree, sweetie.

Charlie: I want her to *CENSORED* my *CENSORED* and *BEEEP BEEEP BEEEEEEEEP* while *CENSORED*,and then *BEEEEEEEEEEEP* and *CENSORED*

Angel: (gasps and clutches his imaginary pearls) Holy Fuck, Babe!!! Cool your jets! (Pulls out his phone and starts recording) I gotta use some of these lines at the next recording!

Charlie: When she smacks my *BEEEEP*, I want to *CENSORED* *BEEEP BEEP* and *BEEEEP-EP-EP-BEEEEEEEP* to taste *CENSORED*.

Lucifer: (faints after hearing his daughter saying such filth)

Angel: (stops recording) ......Fucking-A, Charlie, that's even making me feel dirty.....

Thank you, @sevi-fuk, for giving me the idea of Charlie going fiendish about Vaggie and her muscles.

[nocreativityfornames]

I love these idiots so much

[katboykirby]

I'm in Akiba today and this store has exactly ONE Lucifer...they got him locked up in the glass security case like 🙃 free my boy

[bassysitch]

ok I know I KNOW they’re canonically putting their shoes on the bed and stuff and it irks me to my core but, I have a headcannon that they’re actually not allowed to have shoes in the house (like what else would that big ass entrance hall be for) so they all have all sorts of slippers. Also when Lucifer comes home with groceries they go out with the most ridiculous and random sets of shoes ever just to hurry.

[fandomandfuntimes]

After a rough day, MC summons all the brothers for a cuddle party.

[moraxdreams]

Lucifer, Mammon and Levi are my favourite brothers so I'll rant about them here bc why not ( ◜‿◝ )♡

the big bros are the closest to each other. they've been together for the longest, just the three of them.

i wouldn't be surprised if the devs told us that mammon and levi are twins, they're literally as close as beel and belphie. "But they insult eachother how can they be close" bro that's how sibling are irl. it's a form of endearment at this point.

the way Levi's always snitching on mammon to Lucifer is a big im-gonna-snitch- to-mom-youre-fucked move.

Levi is allowed to keep any and all kinds of animals yet satan can't keep a cat. favouritism.

mammon is always the one to drag levi from his room

mammon *buying* a giant ruri chan figurine bc levi was sad

Lucifer nearly ditching diavolo bc levi turned into a 3 year old, dancing and singing hana ruri for him, and crying when levi told him that he wants to be with his big brother

Levi loves spending time with them

They have routine meet ups in Levi's room

Levi went to a factory tour with Lucifer and pretended to be interested

Lucifer knowing that Levi's bored and going with him to a ruri Hana café even saying that he's gonna help him win the prize

Levi getting all bashful and Luci instantly thinking that he's adorable

Luci and mammon never getting mad at levi

yeah he gets punishments but its nothing like Mammon's

Mammon always cheering levi up

Mammon and levi always teaming up and/or going places together

Them adoring Lucifer and often saying how cool he is

Luci knowing that when Levi's happy his pupils dilate

mammon knowing Levi's ticklish and using that to his advantage

them knowing when Luci's overworked and helping him out

Lucifer saying he's proud of levi

Mammon and levi thinking that Lucifer can be adorable

Just them in general ( ◜‿◝ )♡

[ineveryfandom]

when veruca mammon says...

[sometimes-they-come-back-237]

Here’s a one shot I wrote and posted over on Archive of Our Own: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53513119 and I also wanted to post it here.

Basically if there was an additional scene where Lute went after Niffty.

•

“You all should be worshiping me! You ungrateful, disgusting, fucking losers!”, shouted Adam as he let out a guttural scream of pain. He could see the tip of the blade protruding from his stomach. It shown bright with his blood.

“Woah!”, exclaimed Vaggie.

Lucifer cleared his throat as he and everyone else remained fixated on the dying angel before them. “You got something sticking out of your… your thing there…”

Adam’s vision became foggy, and he fell face first onto the ground. Niffty held tightly onto the handle of the blade as she landed with a thump on his back. She looked down and slowly grinned as she glanced between her victim and her friends.

“Niffty?!”, shouted a surprised Charlie.

Niffty ecstatically gripped her knife and pierced every part of the angel that she could reach. “STAB! STAB! STAB!”, she yelled out of sheer, inordinate delight. “BLOOD!”

“NO!”, yelled the wounded lieutenant who was merely a feet away, eyes locked on her commander’s lifeless body. Lute immediately turned her attention to Niffty. “You little bitch!”, she frantically screamed, using every ounce of her strength to lunge forward, swinging her right arm until she slapped Niffty aside. She quickly pinned Niffty to the ground with her foot, wiping blood from her nose before retrieving the knife that had been used to harm Adam and raised it over Niffty’s neck.

Just as the blade reached Niffty’s chin, a shot rang out. Lute staggered backward, dropping the knife to tend to her already injured shoulder as even more blood poured down her side. “FUCK!” She looked up to see Angel pointing his gun directly at her. She glared at him.

He glared back, aiming the gun at her chest, watching as Niffty got up and ran behind him. He felt her scaling up his back until she settled herself on top of his head.

Lute stood up, taking a step forward as Angel wrapped his finger around the trigger. “Fucking freeze.”

She scoffed. “What? Going to shoot me again?”

Angel smirked. “Yeah, I will. If you ever touch her again”, he raised his eyebrows, gesturing to Niffty.

Niffty gently tugged on his hat as she giggled. “Ooh! You are a bad boy!”, she cooed.

“Not gonna happen, Niff.”

[wikitpowers]

no but like i literally cannot WAIT for twp to come out

i want the new crew to be absolute badasses and i'm ready for another series filled with lovable characters and sarcastic leads and angsty plotlines which drive us mad and reading the books together and SCREAMING at anything that happens

this series already has my entire heart and it's not even out yet :')

[luxthestrange]

Incorrect quotes#877 Lucifer

Sexist Demon: Must be Hard having a Female Demon being your attendant to show you the ropes of being a demon lord, Honeslty it should have been a DE-MEN!

Six Brothers*Looking confused*Why?

The Sexist Demon aristocrat groans loudly and slaps a hand to his face, then takes a few deep breaths before composing himself

Sexist Demon: Look. There are certain roles for men and certain roles for women, right? Now let’s take your family, for example. Who goes to work and brings home the paycheck?

Six Brothers: Our dad-Lucifer!

Sexist Demon: Right! Who pays the rent and puts the bread on the table?

Six Brothers: Our dad-Lucifer!

Sexist Demon: Bingo! And who cooks the meals?

Six Brothers: Our dad-Lucifer!

Sexist Demon*now a bit irritated* Who does the laundry?

Six Brothers: Our dad-Lucifer!

Sexist Demon: Who washes the dishes?

Six Brothers: Our dad-Lucifer!

Demon2: Who scrubs the loo?

Six Brothers: Our dad-Lucifer!

Demon3: Who bakes the cakes?

Six Brothers: Our dad-Lucifer!

Sexist Demon: Then who mows the lawn and washes the car?!

Six Brothers: Mc!

Sexist Demon: So what did your mother do up there!?

Six Brothers:We don’t have a mother

Luci is out there on the human world sneezing as he is buying his brothers treats for behaving(The Giant bear is for Belphie-)

[journey-to-the-attic]

belphie would do that big brother thing where he just walks into ik's room, stands there and stares at her, pulls a face/makes a weird noise, then leaves without a word

[goldenamaranthe-blog]

Happy Easter: Dysfuctional Family

Charlie: (blowing a kazoo through the hotel while wearing white bunny ears and tail, carrying an Easter basket, and throwing bright colored and decorated eggs everywhere)

HAPPY EASTER, EVERYONE!!!

Hazbins: (groan collectively)

Vaggie: (slightly distracted by the tail) Hun, love the enthusiasm, but do you even know the purpose of Easter Sunday is?

Charlie: (cracks open a Cadbury egg and siphons out the innards with her tongue) Isn't it just an excuse to binge on chocolate and snuggle fluffy little bunnies and ducklings?

Angel: (clutches his pearls in ex-Catholic Italian horror) Mama Mia!

Lucifer: *Squeeeeee!* I'll be right back!

Vaggie: I guess that's a more corporate way to put it.

Angel: That's IT!!! I'm making my Mama's Italian Easter Bread! Charlie, you need to be schooled on Easter!

Alastor: Hmmm... I suppose if we're doing a full celebration, I can do a little something to liven things up. (Snaps his fingers, and everyone's clothes are transformed into various colored Bunny footie pajamas)

Charlie: (wearing hot pink bunny jammies and twirls) Oooooh! These are so cuuuute!

Vaggie: (in pastel lavender pajamas and snarling) Cabron!

Angel: (sneaky smirk as he wears a pastel pink and white two-piece pajama suit) Oh, Smiiiiiiles?

Alastor: (simply wearing red bunny ears) No.

Angel: C'mon! Hear me out! (Whispers in Alastor's ear)

Alastor: Hmmmmm.... I'll allow it! (Snaps his fingers again)

Vaggie: (baggy bunny jammies suddenly transform into a black and velvet purple, Las Vegas Showgirl bunny suit with white tail and ears, fishnets, and heels with purple wrist cuffs)

Angel: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! LOOKING GOOD, VAGS!!!!

Vaggie: (growls and tries to cover herself) FUCKING-A, ANGEL!!! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU TELL HIM?!?!?!

Angel: Does it matter? I don't have a soul to sell. (Sees Charlie) Ha! Might wanna focus on your girlfriend, Toots.

Vaggie: What? (Looks at Charlie)

Charlie: (blushing, heart eyes, panting like a puppy, and her pajamas turned into a similar Showgirl suit but red with fox ears and tail)

Vaggie: Ch-Charlie? Charlie! No. No! Charlotte Morningstar, we are in front of guests! Shit! (Runs down the hallway)

Charlie: (hearts explode around her head) Hippity-Hoppity, that ass is my property! (Gives chase)

...........

Vaggie: (rounds back around the corner while carrying Charlie bridal style) Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Lucifer: (rides in on a tidal wave of fluff infused rubber duckies while wearing yellow ducky footie pajamas with orange webbed feet) RELEASE THE QUACKEN!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Alastor: (sighs in aroace exhaustion as a random rubber duck bounces off his head)

Angel: (slowly calming down as he wipes a tear from his eye) It's just like home~

[mysticqueer]

I’m sorry can we talk about this flashback to just after the celestial war bc it has me SOBBING

(from the devilgram story ‘The Rulebook’)

[lukeslywalkers]

Y’all ready to meet my pride and joy for PetGate?! This is Lucy! She’s about to turn 3 years old (she’s a November sagittarius) and she’s, clearly, full of energy! She’s part pit bull, staffy, 100% asshole! She has a boyfriend next door who she terrorizes and will open your Amazon boxes if left alone. Miss Ma’am believes all food is for her and has gotten herself sick a few times. Oddly enough, she’s the smartest dog I’ve ever had and learns quickly. She was a rescue literally from the streets of south Florida so she’s a fighter. She’s so gentle with kids and just wants to talk to everyone. She’s a major love bug and a stage five clinger and WILL get upset if you talk to other people that are not her