#bisexuality is and always has been inclusive

[catboygirljoker]

fun writing tip: you can justify making your blorbos as good at sex as you want if you also make it depressing

i will try not to be too graphic or horny and keep it mostly to character study analysis themes core motivations plot conflicts etc type discussion. still, id really prefer that folks under 18 do not interact with me on this post or about this topic in general, thanks!

for obvious reasons this post is gonna have a cut

UNLIKE HIS DIIIIICK [EXTREMELY LOUD AIRHORNS]

. sorry i just feel like hed appreciate that joke. uh anyway

Brief discussions of: BDSM, including sadomasochism; edgeplay; derealization/dysphoria; self-destructive recklessness in a sexual context.

ok. so there's this fictional guy. and i kiiiiiiind of have a crush on him. and i'm a basic bitch, so, like, obviously, when i think about him hornystyle, i want to imagine him being good at sex.

the thing is, "good at sex" is not always a particularly interesting trait to give a character! it can often be an eyerolling power fantasy trait. like "this is my oc Chuck Dongburger he has a ten pound cock and can make a babe cum just by lookin at her" yknow. it's a trait that, handled incorrectly, is more likely to flatten conflict than create it—more likely to make stories more boring than to make them more interesting.

also, "being good at sex" isnt a magical blessing that descends upon someone by chance. it is a quality that stems from a set of experiences and traits. it is a skill that one develops, or fails to develop.

so the question is, how do i justify him being good at sex? how do i make it feel believable and interesting?

the answer is simple! make it depressing! (that is, relate it directly to the character's central themes and conflicts, and therefore make it a natural part of/inclusion in their story)

in canon, xigbar has had multiple bodies, lost his heart multiple times, allowed himself to be a vessel for darkness on multiple occasions. he has endured all of this to carry out the will of his masters. every social role we've ever seen him take has been subservient to someone else, even if it has usually also involved social power over others, too.

here are the sex/relationship headcanons i have that expand on this:

related to: gender/sexuality

bisexual. for starters. obviously. his transness i have Deep Headcanons about, but his bisexuality is just "idk im bi so hes bi hee hee"

luxu is a binary trans man who experienced severe dysphoria in his original body and never felt like that body really belonged to him in the first place. to the best of his ability he has only chosen cis male vessels, including braig. in those cases he feels extreme disconnect from his body but not [very noticeable] gender dysphoria. the only thing connecting him to his cis male bodies is his sexual characteristics. theres this great art piece that has never left my brain that conveys the idea im going for. his face his hair his bones none of those are his, none of thise feel real, none of those feel right. but what does feel right is his dick.

related to: him being Good at Sex™

he is Very Experienced. he's tried a lot of shit and had a lot of bodies and largely had nothing better to do than be a horndog and kill time suckin and fuckin. he is down for just about anything with just about anybody. he knows how bodies work and knows how to deal with the exceptions and roll with awkwardness and uncomfortableness.

he is pretty good at reading people—it's a skill he has had to develop over his lifetime. he is sometimes wrong, but usually right, and reading people, understanding them, lets him feel like he has some kind of control or power over them. this is relevant because this is part of what makes him Good at Sex. he is shockingly responsive and attentive; not completely unselfish as a lover, but he won't blindly exert his will onto the other person and expect them to respond just because he has a big dick or is going faster or harder or whatever.

related to: his backstory as luxu

sex for him is a means of exerting control over the world, proving his own competence and worth to himself and another person, gaining some simulacrum of human connection, distracting himself from his derealization, grounding himself in his body, expressing and claiming his masculinity. all things, i headcanon, he also achieves (or seeks/has sought to achieve) from keyblade mastery.

he views his bodies as disposable, and knowing that he can just jump ship if he totals a body means that he processes pain differently than most people. not in a "all pain makes him horny" way*—it's more that pain doesn't make his self-preservation kick in the same way it does for other people. in bdsm/kink settings he is a masochist [as well as a sadist] and more reckless with edgeplay (when it comes to himself) than he really ought to be.

obviously i have specific personal motivation for wanting to headcanon this (he and his body are both Significantly Older Than Me) but i don't think he's too bothered by an age gap. some people it makes sense to me to imagine that they'd really want to date within their age and maturity range, but i think xigbar's chill as long as the person he's dating is a self-posessed adult. considering how long he's been alive, he's gonna have a significant gap in experience with ANYBODY; there isn't that much of a difference between him dating a 25 year old vs a 45 or 85 year old.

he has told close romantic partners about his Whole Deal before. it has never gone well. ("what do you mean youve been moving into random people's bodies in order to stay alive long enough to bring back a guy who intentionally manipulated his students into killing all of their students via senseless war??") they never understand and he doesn't know why they don't understand (i also headcanon him having severe cognitive dissonance vis a vis the MoM but that's a different post). his instinct is to put up a wall and go "well theyre just naive and stupid and haven't seen what i've seen, theyre too sentimental to understand this". he still keeps trying (if with less frequency) because he is desperate for someone to understand.

*i want to make this crystal clear: i do not headcanon xigbar as being automatically turned on by receiving or causing pain in every context, because he is a boss in a video game franchise where he fights teenagers. i am not comfortable sexualizing those fights!

(i do however think there are contexts where he might indulge in some "battle sadomasochism" when fighting another adult—maybe he makes it weird for them on purpose to fuck with them, maybe they're both into it and it's all foreplay, etc)

related to: him being subservient

youd think that when i talked about him being subservient to others, i was building up to a headcanon about him being a sub. however it feels most correct [and fun] to me to imagine him being a dom-leaning switch vers (doesnt get dysphoria from bottoming because. prostate). social role and personal dynamics dont necessarily correspond to sexual dynamics!

the headcanon i was actually building up to was that he craves affirmation in specific ways from specific people. he is desperate for someone else to give him worth. he wants to do a good job serving an authority he deems worthy of respect. he wants to be useful, he wants to serve a purpose and have a role. he hates feeling like he needs something from someone else, and feels much more comfortable if they need something from him.

he doesn't have a praise kink in a traditional sense, but he does really get his rocks off from being Good At Sex and from his lovers clearly and obviously enjoying themselves. he doesn't wanna be told hes done a good job, he wants to know, to tell from experience that he's blown someone's mind.

furthermore, in romance, he becomes a massive simp. if he likes someone enough to fall for them then they hang the fucking moon for him. he is outside in the rain crying throwing up begging for a sniff. absolutely pathetic. its not a total transformation of personality, i think he'd really hide it and really want to hide it. but i think in most situations it'd be subtle but observable. every joke he makes is directed to them and checked against their reaction; he stands at a middle distance outside of conversation kinda watching them, observing every move, memorizing their gestures and tics and quirks. he feels i love you before the first date but won't say it until five years into the relationship.

related to: i couldnt put it in the other sections and i really only made these section headers so it wasnt just big walls of text oops

he's a low empathy emotionally constipated bitch at the best of times, so he substitutes emotional intimacy with physical intimacy. picking up people at bars or dances or what have you for one night stands, satisfying them thoroughly, and then immediately dropping out of their lives.

he actively avoids romance (and any emotional closeness, including the completely platonic kind). but he hasn't always been this way. i think Dark Road was the most recent in a long long string of experiences where he lost people he was close to. he's tired of hurting people and getting hurt.

. im not gonna get into it because im trying not to be like too too horny in this post but hes So fucking brat tamer coded to me. i think you will understand at least the surface level reasons for this. i guess if i wanted to relate it to Themes i'd say something like "there is a specific romantic and sexual fantasy in being an asshole and even hurting someone and them still wanting you and trusting you and loving you and even enjoying it" but. well we dont need to go there do we

these are just the Depressing / Character-Related / Themes-y headcanons. some of my headcanons are just like "i think this would be funny and/or in character and/or hot" but you see how long this list is anyway. if i started in on all of that then we'd be here forever.

also, these are just headcanons! they're informed by analysis but shaped heavily by what appeals to me personally, what i find hot, what i find compelling about his character. if your headcanons for him differ from mine in any way, i don't think you're Wrong, because we're talking about the sexuality of a guy who comes from a video game franchise where characters are barely allowed to hold hands. this is all just toys and playing

anyway thank you for reading this post lmao its so long

JUST LIKE HIS DIIIIIIIIIIII—

[lgbtqtext]

[navree]

Never miss an opportunity to drag Riverdale/RAS. Is this like when people were frothing at the mouth whenever others would say that Cheryl Blossom was bisexual?

Oh God don't remind me. I don't care if everyone else has forgotten, I remember when Madelaine Petsch said literally on her YouTube channel that Cheryl was bi after season 2, before they decided to make it canon within the show that she was just fully a lesbian (not a problem, and I'll give the show some minor props that they then remained pretty consistent with Cheryl being a firm lesbian for the remainder of the plot, but the amount of vitriol people would get in season 2 was just Insane).

What the whole "wow can't believe Alicent isn't queer anymore because she's gonna have sex with a man" and "Francesca Bridgerton is a lesbian guys her husband was just comphet" thing boils down to is just an inability to actually see bisexual people as, well, bisexual. It's a failure to understand that a bisexual man or bisexual woman is going to be interested in more than one gender, including potentially someone of the opposite gender, likely because people don't want to acknowledge that they view it as a "lesser" form of queerness. Like, there's a reason why half the time, a character being confirmed bi just means that if you even attempt to ship them outside of a same sex relationship people are going to act fucking insane. A lot of people just see bisexuality not as an actual queer identity in its own right, but as Homosexuality Lite, and treat it accordingly with the lack of respect and care and consideration towards real bisexual people that you then see echoed in fandom spaces towards bisexual characters, either canonical or coded.

With Francesca I'm finding it particularly galling because the show, from what I've seen, has already set up her relationship with her future husband to be one borne of genuine affection and clearly filled with love on both sides, mutually reciprocated. And from what I've been told of her book (I have not read these books nor do I intend to), her feelings of grief and lost love over the fact that her husband died and she was widowed young are a huge part of her story, and why the poignancy of her finding love again in Michael (or, in the show!verse, Michaela) hits especially hard, because it does show that you can have great loves in your life more than just once. So trying to make it seem that there was never any romantic love for John is literally a failure to understand the story and its meaning.

Also I will always bash Riverdale, one of the great building blocks of this blog is bashing Riverdale and RAS's ten million shitty writing decisions, and I shan't be stopped.

[rrcraft-and-lore]

In addition to my Monkey Man post from earlier, the always kind & sweet Aparna Verma (author of The Phoenix King, check it out) asked that I do a thread on Hijras, & more of the history around them, South Asia, mythology (because that's my thing), & the positive inclusion of them in Monkey Man which I brought up in my gushing review.

Hijra: They are the transgender, eunuch, or intersex people in India who are officially recognized as the third sex throughout most countries in the Indian subcontinent. The trans community and history in India goes back a long way as being documented and officially recognized - far back as 12th century under the Delhi Sultanate in government records, and further back in our stories in Hinduism. The word itself is a Hindi word that's been roughly translated into English as "eunuch" commonly but it's not exactly accurate.

Hijras have been considered the third sex back in our ancient stories, and by 2014 got official recognition to identify as the third gender (neither male or female) legally. Pakistan, Nepal, Bangladesh, and India have accepted: eunuch, trans, intersex people & granted them the proper identification options on passports and other government official documents.

But let's get into some of the history surrounding the Hijra community (which for the longest time has been nomadic, and a part of India's long, rich, and sometimes, sadly, troubled history of nomadic tribes/people who have suffered a lot over the ages. Hijras and intersex people are mentioned as far back as in the Kama Sutra, as well as in the early writings of Manu Smriti in the 1st century CE (Common Era), specifically said that a third sex can exist if possessing equal male and female seed.

This concept of balancing male/female energies, seed, and halves is seen in two places in South Asian mythos/culture and connected to the Hijra history.

First, we have Aravan/Iravan (romanized) - who is also the patron deity of the transgender community. He is most commonly seen as a minor/village deity and is depicted in the Indian epic Mahabharata. Aravan is portrayed as having a heroic in the story and his self-sacrifice to the goddess Kali earns him a boon.

He requests to be married before his death. But because he is doomed to die so shortly after marriage, no one wants to marry him.

No one except Krishna, who adopts his female form Mohini (one of the legendary temptresses in mythology I've written about before) and marries him. It is through this union of male, and male presenting as female in the female form of Mohini that the seed of the Hijras is said to begun, and why the transgender community often worships Aravan and, another name for the community is Aravani - of/from Aravan.

But that's not the only place where a gender non conforming divine representation can be seen. Ardhanarishvara is the half female form of lord Shiva, the destroyer god.

Shiva combines with his consort Parvarti and creates a form that represents the balancing/union between male/female energies and physically as a perfectly split down the middle half-male half-female being. This duality in nature has long been part of South Asian culture, spiritual and philosophical beliefs, and it must be noted the sexuality/gender has often been displayed as fluid in South Asian epics and the stories. It's nothing new.

Many celestial or cosmic level beings have expressed this, and defied modern western limiting beliefs on the ideas of these themes/possibilities/forms of existence.

Ardhanarishvara signifies "totality that lies beyond duality", "bi-unity of male and female in God" and "the bisexuality and therefore the non-duality" of the Supreme Being.

Back to the Hijra community.

They have a complex and long history. Throughout time, and as commented on in the movie, Monkey Man, the Hijra community has faced ostracization, but also been incorporated into mainstream society there. During the time of the Dehli Sultanate and then later the Mughal Empire, Hijras actually served in the military and as military commanders in some records, they were also servants for wealthy households, manual laborers, political guardians, and it was seen as wise to put women under the protection of Hijras -- they often specifically served as the bodyguards and overseers of harems. A princess might be appointed a Hijra warrior to guard her.

But by the time of British colonialism, anti-Hijra laws began to come in place folded into laws against the many nomadic tribes of India (also shown in part in Monkey Man with Kid (portrayed by Dev Patel) and his family, who are possibly

one of those nomadic tribes that participated in early theater - sadly by caste often treated horribly and relegated to only the performing arts to make money (this is a guess based on the village play they were performing as no other details were given about his family).

Hijras were criminalized in 1861 by the Indian Penal Code enforced by the British and were labeled specifically as "The Hijra Problem" -- leading to an anti-Hijra campaign across the subcontinent with following laws being enacted: punishing the practices of the Hijra community, and outlawing castration (something many Hijra did to themselves). Though, it should be noted many of the laws were rarely enforced by local Indian officials/officers. But, the British made a point to further the laws against them by later adding the Criminal Tribes Act in 1871, which targeted the Hijra community along with the other nomadic Indian tribes - it subjected them to registration, tracking/monitoring, stripping them of children, and their ability to sequester themselves in their nomadic lifestyle away from the British Colonial Rule.

Today, things have changed and Hijras are being seen once again in a more positive light (though not always and this is something Monkey Man balances by what's happened to the community in a few scenes, and the heroic return/scene with Dev and his warriors). All-hijra communities exist and sort of mirror the western concept of "found families" where they are safe haven/welcoming place trans folks and those identifying as intersex.

These communities also have their own secret language known as Hijra Farsi, which is loosely based on Hindi, but consists of a unique vocabulary of at least 1,000 words.

As noted above, in 2014, the trans community received more legal rights.

Specifically: In April 2014, Justice K. S. Radhakrishnan declared transgender to be the third gender in Indian law in National Legal Services Authority v. Union of India.

Hijras, Eunuchs, apart from binary gender, be treated as "third gender" for the purpose of safeguarding their rights under Part III of our Constitution and the laws made by the Parliament and the State Legislature. Transgender persons' right to decide their self-identified gender is also upheld and the Centre and State Governments are directed to grant legal recognition of their gender identity such as male, female or as third gender.

I've included some screenshots of (some, not all, and certainly not the only/definitive reads) books people can check out about SOME of the history. Not all again. This goes back ages and even our celestial beings/creatures have/do display gender non conforming ways.

There are also films that touch on Hijra history and life. But in regards to Monkey Man, which is what started this thread particularly and being asked to comment - it is a film that positively portrayed India's third sex and normalized it in its depiction. Kid the protagonist encounters a found family of Hijras at one point in the story (no spoilers for plot) and his interactions/acceptance, living with them is just normal. There's no explaining, justifying, anything to/for the audience. It simply is. And, it's a beautiful arc of the story of Kid finding himself in their care/company.

[quinnfabrayapologist]

So JK Rowling just launched Beira's Place, a DV shelter that specifically excludes trans women.

Why does it exclude trans women? You ask

Because they think that trans women might be attracted to the women there, and do something about that attraction

So now if you're attracted to women and trying to use a DV shelter, you could be turned away because you're attracted to women

61% of Bisexual Women experience domestic violence in their lifetime. Over half of lesbians reported being abused at some point in their lifetimes. TERFism and transphobia has also been shown to be overwhelmingly Racist, particularly when it comes to 'clocking' trans people.

This is horrific, but because it's TERF island they're getting away with it. The TERF movement has shut down multiple trans inclusive centres. The TERF movement is, and always has been, about the systematic removal of rights for trans people, gay people, and POCs. This is a nightmare.

[mwolf0epsilon]

Coruscant Pride Month

Thorn, slamming the door to the Guard Barracks wide open: OI! UP AND AT 'EM TROOPERS! Everyone, startling out of their bunks: SIR YES SIR!!! Thorn, marching in with a box in hand: Today marks the start of Pride Month! Veterans, you know what that means! Newbies, get in line to get your very own exclusive Coruscant Guard Pride Pin! Dogma, confused: A Pride Pin...? Isn't that breaking the dress code...? Hound, grinning: Nope! This month is the only month where the Guard are allowed to wear little pins to showcase Coruscant's "love" of inclusivity and diversity. We're actively encouraged to embrace the rainbow. Dogma, frowning: ...Why does this sound like some kind of disingenuous corporate PR plot to make the Senate look good? Olly, sighing: Because it is... Rhythm, rummaging through his trunk: On the bright side, we get to have colorful and pretty pins! Plus, because it's Pride Month, everyone currently on-planet is on their best behavior around us because they don't want to seem like bigoted assholes by attacking the Guard. Thorn, handing Dogma a pin: Here you go kid. Custom made just for you! Dogma, staring at the demisexual homoromantic pin he's just been handed: How did you...? I haven't really told anyone about this... Olly, wearing an asexual homoromantic pin: Thorn has his sources. It's a little scary, honestly... Slick, wearing a bisexual pin: And extremely invasive, if you ask me... Hound, wearing a 'still figuring it out but definitely not straight' pin: He's always just been good at figuring it out. In fact, he's sent pins to every single commander and literally made them realize some stuff about themselves they hadn't even considered. Fox, peeking his head into the barracks: Bastard lost me a ton of credits by clocking Cody in as Aroace before anyone else did. Thorn, snorting: You really shouldn't have bet on his tolerance of Kenobi as being attraction. Fox: Can you blame me? They both have the biggest slut energy...

[genderkoolaid]

I'm sorry but you people have demeaned the word lesbian so badly... the LITERAL definition of a lesbian is a NON-MAN who likes NON-MEN. How is that so fucking hard to understand? Not you specifically, but people like you have made it into something it's not; the whole "bi lesbian" and "straight lesbian" shit, saying trans men can date lesbians (which is literally just transphobic), straight up just saying lesbians can date men???? MEN???? DO YOU NOT HEAR YOURSELVES?

And now the whole butch discourse lmao. Sure, maybe in days long past it was a broader term, but today when someone hears the word butch, I can guarantee their minds will jump to a butch lesbian. If y'all want it to be the GBT community so bad then just say so

Also I can guarantee that you were one of the mfs laughing at lesbians who used he/him or he/they pronouns back in 2020 lmao performative ass bitch

Definitions of words do not descend from Heaven straight from the lips of God. We make them up! So I simply disagree with your definition of lesbian, as do many others. Personally, I enjoy the definition of "queer love/desire for women." For one, it centers lesbianism around women, instead of centering it around the exclusion of men. And two, "non-men loving non-men" is a definition which utterly erases nonbinary people. If an agender person is dating a neutrois person, they are not lesbians- or gay men- simply because y'all cannot get your head out of your binary asses for five seconds. "Non-men loving non-men" is a definition that attempts to be nonbinary-inclusive but only succeeds in making nonbinary & genderqueer identities palatable for radical feminism and political lesbianism. Honestly, I would prefer someone who defines lesbian as "woman loving woman" but understands that many people have complex relationships with womanhood while still feeling attached to the label of lesbian, than someone who uses this "NB-inclusive" definition and goes absolutely feral over genderqueers who are Doing It Wrong.

Anyways, speaking of radical feminism: acknowledging male lesbians and mspec lesbians is not "making lesbianism something its not." It is just recognizing the beautiful complexity that has always existed within lesbianism.

The lesbian community- which I'm using to refer to all kinds of communities organized around queer relationships to women & womanhood- has always been a haven for a lot more people than cis women exclusively into other cis women. The idea of sexuality-as-identity is very recent, and the idea of drawing a hard line between people who only like people of the same gender and people who like the same gender and more is also extremely recent. Beyond that, trans men and nonbinary people have always taken shelter under lesbianism. "Butch" in the context of lesbianism has always been a trans* identity, a way for people with a queer gender to find community and safety.

The reason why we have this idea of lesbianism as a strict category with hard borders is..... you guessed it..... radical feminism! And specifically "political lesbianism," which essentially placed woman-only relationships as the only true feminist relationship you could have. "Lesbian" became a political identity because of its focus on woman-woman relationships. But that meant that, for political lesbianism to be acceptable to radical feminism, it needed to conform to radical feminist beliefs about what makes a good feminist. Which meant:

No trans women or fems (because they are too male and probably predators)

No trans men or mascs (because they are too male and also traitors)

No bisexuals (because they are too male by association and are also traitors)

No penetrative sex, or at least no strap ons (because it imitates men)

No kinky sex (see above but with bonus "kink is evil" flavoring)

No butch/femme roles (because they imitate heterosexuality; everyone has to be neutrally androgynous).

I believe that much of modern lesbian discourse comes from trying to marry lingering radfem beliefs with modern attempts at trans-inclusivity. So you adapt the blatant transphobia: now, trans women are allowed in (as long as they are palatable to cis women), because they're women! And nonbinary people can also be allowed in- at first they were woman-aligned, and then later as long as they weren't man-aligned. Being butch/femme is Back In Style, but we have to soothe the gender anxiety that butches cause by assuring everyone that only True Lesbians can be butch, and butches are always women, even if they kind of aren't, but regardless they're definitely not men, because butch has always been a lesbian term (except it hasn't.) The discourse is haunted by the ideas that lesbianism is constantly under attack, more than anyone else, and that lesbian culture is unique and special and must be guarded from (male/-aligned) invaders who are probably also sexual predators.

To say that this is all just "days long pasts" ignores both that, in physical queer spaces there very much still are male lesbians and bi lesbians who are accepted parts of their local communities, and that you only see those days as "long past" because of the impact of radical feminism on lesbianism. The only reason you see these changes as a good thing is because you've swallowed radical feminist ideas without realizing it.

Also, "if you say butch most people will think of butch lesbians" is an extremely silly argument. Literally who fucking cares. If you say "man" there are still a lot of people who will immediately think of exclusively cis men (see: every feminist who says shit like "if men could get pregnant). Does that mean that trans men should just give up their identities because other people don't understand them? You dork?

Anyways. The funniest part of this ask is how damn confident you are that I was apparently hating on he/him lesbians three years ago. Idk how to tell you this but I'm a boygirl gaylesbianbisexual and have identified this way for years. I have been personally terrorized by shitty lesbian identity politics, the same ones you are repeating now, which told me that if I was even 1% male then identifying as a lesbian made me a disgusting predator. Which caused me years of suffering because no matter how hard I tried, I could not ignore my multigenderedness and how that affected my sexuality. Sowwy but you look silly as hell and your argument is bad and you should feel bad </3

[fallen-daughter]

I'm not against the pan label in any way, but it kind of terrifies me how many people I talk to that genuinely believe "pan = attracted to everyone" and "bi = attracted to everyone that isn't trans/nonbinary."

I'm bisexual. I'm attracted to all genders. Including nonbinary and trans people. That isn't me mislabeling myself, either. Bisexuality has always been "two or more" (or "attraction to all genders" as opposed to pan which is "attraction regardless of gender" depending on who you ask. I personally use the "attraction to all genders" definition of bi for myself).

While I also believe in the concept of "gender and sexuality can be fucky, so use whatever labels you think fit you," I've determined that the pan label doesn't fit me like bi does, and I refuse to be told I'm "actually pansexual" or use pan and bi interchangeably just because there are people out there who still believe "bi = cis men and cis women, and pan = all."

If you use the pansexual label, that's fine. I don't have a problem with people identifying as pan. What I have a problem with is people who think pan is a "more inclusive" version of bi and use that definition of pan while claiming bisexuality doesn't include trans and nonbinary people.

I'm just really getting tired of explaining to people that bisexuality includes trans and nonbinary people. I'm tired of people assuming I'm transphobic because I don't identify as pan or "correcting" me when I give them the details of my attraction.

The pansexual label has a place in the queer community and pansexual people should be allowed to exist in queer and mspec spaces unimpeded. This doesn't mean we should keep letting these misconceptions about bisexuality continue, however. I want pan people to denounce these misconceptions just as hard as bi people have to.

If you're pan, please correct people when they use the incorrect definitions of bi and pan. It'll make things a million times easier if we work together to educate people.

[mischiefbuckley]

just thinking about how this specific instagram story that oliver posted is what made me finally want to watch 911 because again me being bisexual and then yk hearing about a main character on a tv show going canonically bisexual on their seventh season and seeing some of the backlash from people on this storyline for buck’s character and seeing how oliver responded in such a way that goes on to defend the representation as well as point out how the show is about “love and inclusion. It’s featured queer relationships from the very beginning…” and the final paragraph just saying “If one other character finding a new facet to his sexuality and realising his bisexuality is your deal breaker - I fear you’ve missed the entire point of the show. You are not required to announce your departure.”

beatutiful beautiful beautiful words and again such a lovely way to express your love for the fans and again now fans can find themselves identifying even more with buck and just being again able to have this new bisexual representation with one of the main characters on the show on top of the queer representation that has already been present on the show from the very beginning and again it help in brining in an influx of new fans and a new audience to the show/fandom including myself so that’s always nice to have people fall in love with a show that has been airing for years now and for the new fans to find the same love for the show that’s had people hooked on from the very beginning

anyways I love oliver stark very much and again one of the many reasons I love my beloved buck 🥹💙🩷💜

[retropineapple]

In response to a transphobic post that I found,that was made by a fellow member of the LGBTQ+ community.

Just because the term nonbinary was created in 2000 that doesn't mean that nonbinary people didn't exist before then.

Trans people were at Stonewall,although it is true that the terms transexual and transvestite were used then(I'm not sure as to whether or not transgender was used then). And yes,these trans/transexual people we're usually gay as well. Also,trans is often used as an umbrella term for transgender,transexual,and transvestite people,and nonbinary people (as we aren't the same gender we were assigned at birth).

It is true that the Stonewall riots aren't the only reason we have Pride, it was,and in many ways still is,a demonstration for equal rights.

Memorializing "...queer,trans,black, indigenous and people of color(QTBIPOC) activists at the forefront of the 20th century lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, intersex, asexual, plus (LGBTQ+) movement." doesn't mean that we stop memorializing the white people at the forefront of the 20th century of LGBTG+ movement that didn't use the term queer for themselves and were cisgender or didn't use the term trans/transgender.

People may night ID as just queer or use the term queer, but queer is an all-encompassing and all-inclusive term. It describes anyone and everyone that has an identity that challenges the heteronormative standard. The standard that a person will be with one person of the "opposite" sex/gender;the standard that a person will develop both sexual and romantic attraction to people;the standard that a person's gender matches their sex;ECT.

It is also true that Intersex people are often only brought be people in the queer/LGBTQ+ people as a sort of gotch'ya. Specifically Trans people and Trans allies bring up Intersex people to tell transphobes that sex and gender are more complicated than they think. And it's not right,we shouldn't bring up Intersex people as a stepping stool for our rights and acceptance. Intersex people deserve their rights too. Obviously not all trans people and allies do this,but it is a problem.

Pride is and has always included lesbians,gay men,and bisexuals,saying otherwise is ridiculous. Trans people aren't the end of the queer/LGBTQ+ community, we've always been a part of the community, we've always existed,and we aren't going anywhere.

Lesbians,gay men,and bisexuals have NEVER been an afterthought in the community, they're focused on the most,and have the most representation. More rights and representation for other queer people doesn't mean less for others.

Transphobia is always misinformed and harmful, but your transphobic message is even more so because it comes from a fellow member of the community who should know and be better.

The first rainbow flag, designed by Gilbert Baker, does cover everyone,and here you are trying to pull it away from trans people and other "niche demographics". The message of the flag was inclusion,but it seems you don't understand that.

🩷❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜

[poetry-protest-pornography]

💗💜💙Happy Bisexuality Awareness Week! 💗💜💙

A reminder that bisexuality is and always has been trans and non-binary inclusive!

Please high five and/or hug your local bisexuals extra this week, to let them know you see them!

[haggishlyhagging]

It has been said that female separatism is radical feminism's natural and logical conclusion. Most radical feminists have chosen not to follow their politics all the way to that end and do what they can to avoid, ignore, or deny it. Anti-separatist feminists engage in what has been called "thought termination," meaning the act of refusing to follow one's own thoughts to their logical conclusions, in order to justify their decision to stay connected to males. They also encourage this thought termination in other women, wanting to undermine female separatism as a legitimate political and personal choice for their own selfish reasons.

When making political and feminist analysis or when attempting to determine in your own life if a particular decision is feminist or anti-feminist, it is useful to ask the ancient Roman legal question: "Cui bono?" or "Who benefits?" Of course, women do stand to gain certain rewards and privileges from engaging in male loyalism, misogyny, and anti-feminist actions, but whatever the matter at hand, an anti-feminist and anti-female decision will ultimately benefit males the most. When we ask "Who benefits the most?" from women and girls choosing to lead male-inclusive and male-centric lives, the answer is clear: males do.

The most recent studies have found that heterosexual marriage makes men happier and women more unhappy overall. The overwhelming majority of domestic labor and childcare continue to fall on the wife's shoulders in heterosexual marriage throughout the developed world, and this is true even while most married heterosexual women in developed countries work full-time throughout adulthood. Heterosexual and bisexual women openly admit to experiencing sex in their heterosexual relationships that ranges from inorgasmic and boring to violent, humiliating, and painful. Outside of heterosexual relationships, women and girls often find themselves on the losing side of unequal relationships with male family members and friends who take advantage of their labor, emotional and otherwise, and do not reciprocate or bother suppressing their sexism.

The power struggle between males and females has always been sexual, both in the carnal and reproductive sense. Even the word patriarchy rests on the sexual, social, and familial arrangements that exist in a predominantly heterosexual, mixed society where men and women live in constant contact with each other: rule of the father assumes that women and girls are in a position to be ruled, both socially and physically. It assumes the presence of a man.

Female separatism is the unavoidable, ultimate conclusion of radical feminist politics for the simple reason that separatism alone prevents the male objective driving men's oppression and domination of the female sex: using women and girls as sexual, domestic, social, and economic resources. If this is the point of patriarchy, how can anything other than female separatism be the solution to it? In a system where males already have all the power and control, women and girls will never be able to change their own status or achieve liberation from oppression through cooperating with males and granting them everything they demand.

Males want sexual access to female bodies above all else, and furthermore, they rely on women and girls to perform the domestic labor, social labor, and professional labor that keep men comfortable physically, emotionally, and psychologically. For thousands of years, men universally made sure that women and girls could not survive independently of them by locking us out of education, paid work, and the political arena and refusing to give us basic rights to own money and property. They knew and feared that if women had the option to survive and thrive apart from men, most of us would choose to do exactly that.

The only reason women now have the legal rights and protections that allow us to reject heterosexual marriage and motherhood is because we fought hard for those rights and protections over the course of at least a hundred years in developed countries, and we are still fighting all over the world, not only to gain what we lack but to protect what we have. Men have never yielded any political concessions to women willingly, easily, or readily. They have resisted us every step of the way, and they will never cease their attempts to take back the progress we've made.

If female separatism was of no consequence to the male sex, they wouldn't have spent all of recorded history making it virtually impossible. They wouldn't now be going out of their way to destroy any and all female-only spaces, both physical and digital, in the name of transgenderism. They would not have lorded physical and sexual violence over us since the beginning of time as punishment for our resistance and disobedience.

-Sekhmet She-Owl, “Female Separatism: The Feminist Solution” in Spinning And Weaving: Radical Feminism for the 21st Century

[utilitycaster]

You know the meta I said I'd write that people would be weird about? Or even if you didn't? Here we go: welcome to "Caleb was in love with Jester, but the fact that this was unrequited is what makes this so crucial to his story."

Caleb developed romantic feelings for Jester fairly early in Campaign 2; the turning point is widely considered to be when they dance together when he's drunk in Hupperdook and she helps put him to bed. He nursed these feelings secretly for much of the campaign. Liam also outright stated, in the famous "bisexual maestrom" quote on Talks, that he also had some degree of romantic feelings or sexual attraction towards Essek, Astrid, and Eadwulf, concurrently.

Caleb also considered these feelings for Jester to be "useless". Liam used that exact term on Talks [Discussing 2x96], and stated at that time that Caleb felt Beau or Fjord would be a better partner for Jester. He saw his feelings as a "problem"; they interfered with his other plans.

The song "She" by Dodie, which was initially on Liam's playlist for Caleb regarding Jester, and was taken off due to complaints about it being about a bi woman longing for another woman, is also, more relevantly to its inclusion, about an unrequited love the singer themself believes is unrequited, and has no intentions of acting upon ("Oh, oh/and I'll be okay/Admiring from afar/Cause even when she's next to me/We could not be more far apart/Cause she tastes like birthday cake, and storytime, and fall/But to her I taste of nothing at all").

In the campaign wrap-up, Liam reiterated that it was his intention for Caleb to pine in silence, and that he feared Jester intuiting Caleb's feelings or asking him directly.

(below a cut for length)

Caleb's behavior on Rumblecusp can be interpreted as him tentatively feeling out Jester's feelings towards him. Per Laura's statements in the same campaign wrap-up, Jester was unaware of Caleb's feelings. Onscreen, during the Rumblecusp arc, Jester repeatedly took Caleb's advances and then turned to Fjord (Caleb casting Tongues on her and her using it to talk to Fjord; Caleb mentioning she looked ill and her asking Fjord to feel her forehead). He immediately then proceeds to commit to a new plan for the future - one which still would not make a compatible life for Jester (excising the rot within the Empire); pushes Jester towards Fjord while dancing and deliberately avoids dancing with her; and finally tells her about his past, something which he had always avoided doing. Jester (and Caduceus) were very carefully excluded from Caleb's confidence until this time.

One can, and I do, interpret Caleb's choice to tell Jester about his past in episode 110 as him truly saying goodbye to the possibility of a relationship. It is notable that by this point, he had learned that he and Essek had quite a lot in common, particularly pertaining to their feelings about themselves and their pasts, which had always been the defining barrier in why he felt he had to protect Jester from knowing the truth of his past. Jester symbolized a person Caleb felt he would have loved had he not been subjected to his trauma. And so, him finally telling her really feels like a turning point, where he accepts he must relinquish his control over how she sees him.

Not long after, in Eiselcross, Caleb notices that Jester and Fjord appear to be romantically involved (in a scene entirely prompted by Liam), and begins to process those feelings.

In short, for most of the campaign, Caleb never intended to tell Jester how he felt. He made a very minimal foray into exploring whether perhaps she felt the same way, but only after he found that he had another serious romantic option (and, out of game, at a point where he knew Jester had other romantic options). He then immediately backed off when he felt she was more interested in someone else, all without ever revealing how he felt to her. Indeed, there's something to be said by how profoundly Caleb's relationship to Jester was defined by his silence with her specifically (as compared to the rest of the Mighty Nein) - about his past, about his feelings, and about what he thought of her own choices.

In that same episode of Talks Machina (for 2x96), Liam remarked, in the context of Beau's deal with Isharnai, that Caleb was often uncomfortable criticizing others, because he felt he was not a good enough person to do so. It can be argued he was able to pursue something with Essek both because he finally, by that time, had developed a stronger sense of self worth; but also here was someone who had similar enough sins for him to feel as though he could come to them as an equal - regardless of whether you agree on the moral equivalence of their past choices, it is pretty strongly stated that Caleb feels this way.

The above could be seen as a condemnation of Caleb, and, for what it's worth, it isn't intended to. I think Caleb's guilt, and how he grapples with it slowly throughout the campaign, is central to the character. I think it's explored beautifully, in a realistic and nonlinear fashion (notably with the Vergesson Sanatorium, which occurs after Caleb has been otherwise on a pretty significant turn towards recovery). I think it is very real and understandable that he wants to keep the darkness of his past from someone whom he sees as its opposite, even though it means he has to keep his distance from her as a result. I admire Liam's willingness to explore some of the difficult, messy, and even ugly aspects of Caleb's trauma response.

I also happen to like Caleb's love for Jester as part of the story. It feels very genuine and makes sense as part of his arc; as Liam says, she makes him laugh again after a very long time when he wasn't sure he could. It's absolutely beautiful, and incredibly important to the story of Caleb healing. But part of that healing is Caleb realizing that what he wants and what Jester wants are incompatible, and making his peace with that.

Caleb is quite self-aware and brutally honest regarding his feelings for Jester, and quickly realizes that there is not sufficient room to accommodate Jester in the life he wants. Earlier on, he can only see so far as going through time to rescue his parents, and as he cannot even bring himself to tell Jester about his past, he cannot share that goal with her, the way he does with Veth and Beau. Later, as he begins to see past that moment, and imagine what his life might look like if he continues to live, he reconnects with his childhood desire to become a teacher, and his feelings evolve from wishing to escape the Empire or work against it, to wishing to correct the wrongs within it and be a force for good from the inside. But this is, as previously stated, also incompatible with Jester's desire for adventure, and more seriously, with her religious beliefs and her desire to return home to the coast. This, too, is directly stated by Liam; that Caleb knew he would not give up his life to give Jester the one she wanted, and this was a factor in him believing she would be happier with someone else whose future was more in line with hers.

In many ways, the best comparison to Caleb's feelings for Jester are his feelings towards Frumpkin: an incredibly crucial part of Caleb's healing process and character development throughout the campaign, and something that will always hold meaning for him, but something that represents an attachment to a different possibility he has since lost. He understands that with both, he must let them go in order to actually resume his life.

It is telling that in that dance back in Hupperdook, Caleb calls her Astrid. Jester is an echo of his past from the moment he begins having feelings for her, and never quite fits as a partner in his present. Which isn't to say it could never have happened, but it would have required Caleb to change so profoundly he would be unrecognizable: it would have required him turning his back on the Empire entirely, rather than trying to fix what was wrong, so that he could adventure with her as she dreamed of doing. It would have also required him loosing his vise grip on Jester's good opinion of him and risking her rejection, something he only does when holding back would put the entire party in danger. In-story, Caleb always knew he could never make those compromises for her.

Caleb's plan to bring back his parents - which is an incredibly smart and time-travel genre-savvy one - relies on his past self being unaware his parents survived, lest he create a paradox. Even in the scenario in which he undoes the harm to his parents, he knows can never truly undo the harm to himself. He is never the person he thought could truly be Jester's partner. That version of Caleb died long ago. The arc of his story throughout the campaign is him piecing together a person who can exist and grow and love again. Jester is incredibly important to that, but she is not its end point.

I started writing this before second half of the Nein two-shot aired, and I would like to add that I interpret the six month gap when the Nein were not getting together regularly as, among many other things, Caleb giving himself time to get over these feelings. I hope the above makes it clear that I think they were very real and very important, but also very much one-sided from a person who, within the narrative, expected them and indeed somewhat hoped for them to remain one-sided.

[biphobia-archive]

Prejudice at Pride. A black bis‌e‌xual woman's experience in pride events

Comic description:

Prejudice at Pride

Panel 1

[Image] A black woman wearing a headwrap, looking at the reader. She looks concerned. The background is horizontal block colours – a rainbow pattern.

[Caption] I get nervous before any LGBT event. Especially Pride.

Panel 2

[Image] Two men, one white, and one black. Both look angry, and both are holding rainbow flags.

[Caption] There’s so much hate towards bisexuals at these events. I can’t have children. These words hurt. A lot.

White man: Breeders!

Black man: Get out of here, switcheroos.

Panel 3

[Image] The woman facing away from the reader, at the backs of the two men, still holding their rainbow flags. The woman is also holding a rainbow flag, but hers is lowered.

[Caption] Pride is supposed to be a celebration, but it hasn’t been for me on many occasions.

Panel 4

[Image] A hand pushing the back of the woman, who looks startled, and is lurching forward

[Caption] I’ve received physical abuse too. Pushed.

Panel 5

[Image] A hand holding a rainbow flag and pushing it into the woman’s back. The woman looks annoyed.

[Caption] Prodded.

Panel 6

[Image] The woman grasping at her shoulder. A hand has grabbed her bra strap and is pulling.

[Caption] Tugged.

Panel 7

[Image] The woman, looking scared. A hand is shoving a whistle into her mouth.

[Caption] And this. It’s almost always gay men who get physical.

[Speech bubble] Now blow, breeder!

Panel 8

[Image] The woman sitting on a park bench. Behind her, a frowning white man holding a large rainbow flag spits at her. The spit has landed on the woman’s face, and she looks shocked. Her hand is on her cheek where the spit has landed.

[Caption] When biphobia combines with racism, it’s even worse.

Panel 9

[Image] The woman, still sitting on the park bench, but the image is zoomed out. The man holding the large rainbow flag is turned away, and has become a silhouette, blending into a crowd of other silhouettes. The woman is crying and shaking.

[Caption] Sometimes I get so scared at LGBT events that I find myself shaking.

Panel 10

[Caption] If gay and lesbian people don’t understand me – having been on the receiving end of hate themselves – then how will anyone else understand?

Panel 11

[Caption] I once thought Black Pride would be better. But it’s not. It’s just less racist.

Panel 12

[Image] A parade. A white girl is on the back of a truck, and a white man holding a rainbow flag follows on foot. Silhouettes dot the sidewalk beside the parade. One silhouette is darker than the others.

[Caption] I often ask myself why I keep going to these events.

Panel 13

[Image] The same scene, but zoomed in closer on the darker silhouette, who is now shown in full detail. She is a young black woman, smiling widely.

[Caption] But then I’ll see a black face in the crowd…

Panel 14

[Image] A closeup of the young black woman, in the crowd of otherwise white parade-watchers. Her eyes are bright and she is smiling.

[Caption] Black and bi people have told me that my presence really made them feel hopeful, encourage. Being visible is important to me.

Panel 15

[Image] The black woman with the headwrap, smiling, and holding a rainbow-patterned heart against her chest.

[Caption] I shouldn’t hide a big part of myself through fear from the very people who are meant to support me. I just hope the next LGBT event I go to really will be inclusive to all the parts of me.

Full story here.

[hellomynameisbisexual]

We exist! We always have! We are bisexual!

We navigate a world often divided by binaries, yet our essence thrives in the beautiful spectrum between and beyond. We are the double helix, the vibrant blend on the artist's palette, the melody with interwoven notes.

Bisexuality isn't about who we love, it's about who we are. It's the strength to defy limitations, the confidence to claim our space, the unwavering truth that our desires and identities are valid.

For too long, invisibility has shrouded our experiences. We've been erased, our stories silenced. But the tide is turning. We are the rising generation, demanding to be seen, to be heard.

Inclusion isn't a favor, it's a necessity. It's about acknowledging the richness we bring to every aspect of life - workplaces, friend groups, communities. It's about shattering the stereotypes that hold us back.

Bisexuality isn't a phase, a trend, or a question mark. It's a powerful declaration of self, a vibrant tapestry woven from resilience and pride.

So, stand tall, fellow bi warriors. Let your voices resonate. Let your presence be known. We are architects of our own identities, and together, we will build a world that reflects the beautiful complexity of who we are.

This is our time. This is our space. We are seen. We are heard. We are Bi and Bold.

[butchtwinkimp]

Tfw a cis het ally has more sense and more of an open mind than the (at least online) queer community you’re actively a part of. Meanwhile my fellow lesbians on this comment thread were all telling me im not a lesbian and to “go have fun being bisexual then!” Mind you i never said anything about being personally attracted to men I was just defending bi dykes and their right to exist in lesbian/sapphic spaces. Mind you this argument all started under a post from the DYKE MARCH… you know… the march built by and for dykes that has ALWAYS been inclusive to anyone of the dyke experience no matter how transgender or technically bisexual?

Also had at least one person tell me enbies cant be lesbian but I would say most everyone that was responding to me were pissed that I would dare insinuate someone could be both bisexual and a lesbian lol