#bleach randomness

[shiinagamii]

(a/n: I changed the fc of EBK Hekka because him being Dave East seems more fitting to me)

How the Soul Society talks about EBK HEKKA

random shinigami: That nigga doesn't even own black air forces, he owns all black timbs.

*cues static*

random shinigami: fighting EBK Hekka is like fighting Dr. Strange if he was trained by 2014 prime Seth Rollins and the legend killer version of Randy Orton himself.

*cues static*

random shinigami: When this nigga fought Ichigo, he told him that he was gonna stomp him so hard that the next person he sees is Masaki.

interviewer: Masaki?! As in Ichigo's dead mother?!

random shinigami: YUP! And he woke up and saw her too!

*cues static*

random shinigami: THIS NIGGA TOLD KENPACHI THAT HE'S THE REASON WHY HE EVEN STARTED THE KENPACHI TREND IN THE FIRST PLACE BUT, HE GAVE IT UP BECAUSE HE GOT BORED BEATING UP NIGGAS! DO YOU KNOW HOW TERRIFYING THAT IS?!

*cues static*

random shinigami: Hekka literally was not only the original captain of squad eleven but, he was literally a royal guard when he was young too!

interviewer: How old was he when he rose up to the ranks?

random shinigami: 10 years old he became a captain and 15 when he became a royal court guard member.

interviewer: THE FUCK?!

*cues static*

random shinigami: he German suplexed Byakuya so hard that his soul flew into the hookah lounge.

interviewer: that sounds about tame...

random shinigami: then he hit him with the hookah bottle so fast that his gigai transported to The Bronx and his spirit flew all the way to Harlem. *starts crying* he even yelled fore in the process too!

interviewer: Jesus JaylinDeMarcus Christ.....

*cues static*

random shinigami: the craziest thing about this is that he doesn't even use his zanpakuto like that; he just uses his were hyena form, his hands and feet and his new york magic. But, he actually has two shikais and six bankais according to Captain Kyoraku.

Interviewer: NIGGA I BEG YOUR FINEST FUCKING PARDON?!

*cues static*

random shinigami: if you see this nigga wipe his nose with his finger, start running. If you hear hyena laughter after he wipes his nose and starts charging himself up, RUN! FASTER!

*cues static*

random shinigami: Shunsui Kyoraku, you dumb drunk bitch ass nigga, why the fuck did you think it was a good idea to put Hekka in the same room with the nigga that got him exiled from the soul society like they don't got beef with each other?! He used you as a weapon to knock out this nigga Aizen into next year. That's how much he hates that nigga.

*cues static*

random shinigami: this nigga formed a crew that consists of a gang banging quincy that's highly skilled in voodoo, four strippers that are reincarnated from elemental gods from different pantheons, three unserious ass espadas that Aizen experimented on who like to fight just because, two fullbringer sisters who are part time rappers and a soul reaper that is not only the get away driver of the crew but was only the former lieutenant to Captain Unohana crazy ass. Let all of that sink in.

*cues static*

random shinigami: Do you have any idea what EBK stands for?! It stands for Eloquent Brawling Killers, but yet they fight like they're in WWE. Not to mention that he made himself and his crew immortal, yeah so imma just go on ahead and put in my two weeks notice right now-

interviewer: If you don't sit your ass down right now.

[jazzy0clock]

Siblings are always annoying (most of them)

[elvyn]

Once again, my last drawing of the year is this stupid bob guy 😭

[bankaizen]

SHINJI HIRAKO | intro + outro fight cinematic for @shinjihirakos ♡

[fbfh]

did you know that Dean wakes up one morning and realizes he has a fucking bombshell of a wife/husband/spouse, a cozy (slightly rural) suburban house, and not one but three fucking daughters???? Did you know that he woke up one morning to toddler giggles and little kid bickering and baby babbling????? and your girls come charging in hushing their little giggles so they don't wake up mommy and daddy and so OBVIOUSLY he has to pretend to be asleep so he doesn't foil their plan. he focuses all his energy on keeping his face and body relaxed, keeping his breathing even. they're whispering and babbling and Dean peeks an eye open and looks at the love of his life and these three angels with their daddy's attitude and their mama's heart. they have your eyes and his smile. they're... the best parts of both of you, and there's something entirely new and beautiful in each of them too.

Bobby Dean is your oldest, and her 4th birthday is just around the corner. She's 3 and 3/4 right now, and won't let anyone forget it.

Your second is Jodi John, or JJ informally. She's fought her way half way through the terrible twos and is already getting a head start on the whole 3 going on 13 thing.

Mary Cass, or Cassie, is your youngest. She's just over a year old, and wants to do everything her big sisters do.

And Dean is looking at your little girls, and at you. He sees the way the morning sunlight dapples in through the window and illuminates their tangled hair and disney princess nightgowns. Your face is all puffy from sleep, and you still smell like the apple pie you made yesterday.

it's real, he realizes. that pipe dream that apple pie life.

you gave that to him. you did that. you turned his deepest, most unspoken desires into a reality like it was nothing. and every ounce of joy and love and peace he feels every moment of every day, he owes it all to you. You try to tell him on occasion when he gets all sentimental on you, he deserves it. he deserves every good thing he feels, and he's so great with the girls, he's a natural dad and you couldn't possibly dream of a better husband to do it with.

Because at his heart, Dean is a family man. He's your family man.

[yu2ki]

🐝💐

[cupcek]

[krewekreep]

Baby Daddy Red Flags: Bleach Edition (😜🤍)

This one…this one for the sluts! 😭💕 I’m an old anime bitch like lemme get it out my system! (We gonna tag this #ToxicTalk lmaoo, this is a safe space)

(If you wanna know who we share 😒, I’ll add an asterisk or whatever. ((They still mine first 😂💝🫡)) (will update and repost with new additions, semi-live post)

***ICHIGO: Lemme get my baby daddy out the way. Biggest issues would be his availability before and after the kid. Probably got pregnant in a makeup sex situation anyway. Ichigo doesn’t seem to type to breakup but will say let’s break. Based on how selfless he is it also can be seen coming from him not being able to save his mom—so he may have a savior complex. It may seem valiant at first like “oh wow you became friends with Chad helping him with bullies? You became closer to Orihime (😒) after helping her grieve her brother? You’re such a good person!” Til you realize seniority is in place and when his friends call he drops whatever he is doing to go help. It’s been time, money, etc and increasingly his selflessness comes off as codependent. Like he can’t stop trying to make up for something that wasn’t his fault.

He will also randomly reserve to right to become reclusive. Not necessarily secretive but less energetic, talkative, or engaged. (You def realize your baby got some functional depression going on. Iykyk). Might not annoy you but the random times he doesn’t want to be touched or seemingly avoids you does hurt…but he sincerely comes back letting you know he was in a weird space etc.

Ichigo’s biggest yes or no is if you’ll be able to sometimes come second or third (likely til you marry and/or have kids with him.) His father and sisters are absolutely #1, his friends are #2, and his oath to the Soul Society and humanity at large is a consequence of him protecting the first two so that’s of course #3. See where I’m going? Even on your best days you might be upset he runs off to Rukia’s or Orihime’s aid. That he has to “save the world,”to save you too. Jealous types might really become frustrated with Ichigo. And tbh I don’t see him breaking out of his ways. He won’t see a need to because there’s real results of his good deeds in his life. He knows he’s saved lives, so he knows he can continue to—so will you be able to handle the fact his duty and mindset will be self sacrificing? I don’t know I think I’d tie him down with a baby and move on.

**KENPACHI: I fully accept and am attracted to his animalistic tendencies. I absolutely can admit that about myself 😭 but…realistically you’d def have to tell him he’s too rough during sessions. He’s grown up wayward, defensive, survival mode, stomach touching his back— during a time so seemingly historical and old who knows how bad the conditions of poverty were—most kids died if they simply weren’t rich and able to eat. Or turned to crime at extremely young ages or exploited….That’s just global history in real life. And the soul society is that much more complex and arduous. Kenpachi will be a man of few words but immense action. If you want someone who will open up even eventually that is not Kenpachi Zaraki. You will highly likely never know of his past because he will never say he is excruciatingly doing everything to never have to. And no, he won’t communicate ever if anything terrible is on his mind. Although kenpachi is coded as barbaric he really is just that protective—he’s as angry as he will be based solely upon someone’s proximity to him emotionally. You and Yaru will be so exclusively held in a regard he won’t even understand. Just the black hole of his awareness he’ll surpass anything to save y’all. He won’t speak on why Lady Unohana isn’t around anymore (new anime, manga lore). But again, when he ends up rough too many nights in a row you distance yourself from him. He can’t admit to you he disassociates and goes back to bad times. He can’t tell you your comfort and warmth makes him remember the times he needed it before—he doesn’t mean to hurt you but he lives for a fight. But he wants to stop making everything and everyone something to “conquer.” He’ll be a real deal handful and it will solely up to you to either tell him you can’t be with him until he figure shit out or you’ll stick beside him and work through it together. (In this case Yaru is the “kid” yall share, I see him being weary of birthing a child and being a dad in such a “visceral” way. Will have total abandonment trauma and just can’t see him getting over it completely to bring new life into a world he already sees the worst in tbh.) but in terms of “baby momma” treatment? Or your prioritized and protected best believe. 💕 he also will force you to learn combat cause you should be able to take care yourself too. Which might either be hot or burdensome. You’re gonna know how to fight. And tbh he might try to bring it into the bedroom on some weird let’s play fight shit so watch yourself. That’s a BIG MAN! 😭😂💕 “HA! Now that you know how do a few things why don’t you test it on me?” Big cheeky sneaky ass grin girl don’t fall for it!

BYAKUYA: This is the guy who will match your freak everywhere but in public. No PDA—actually don’t even look at him or try to talk to him in public…be professional. He will be joking with others and you’ll get upset saying “Hey! You let the other members of the society tease you?” And in private he’ll admit it’s just to keep up appearances and he hates it all. 😭 I think his biggest issue will be coming off fake or disingenuous or you’ll have a hard time sincerely seeing him cause he’ll be so different depending on where y’all are. People wouldn’t know he’s like a mom boyfriend who makes sure you eat, sleep, and keep up with yourself. Yes, he will absolutely unintentionally say something insulting like “This doesn’t suit you. Find something else.” And yes he will be very clearly on guard when in public. People will openly wonder why you’re with him tbh. Which will frustrate the both of you of which neither of you ever bring up to the other. Byakuya has lost a love before—he won’t talk about it ever. You MIGHT get something out of Rukia about it cause it was her sister but I doubt she’ll go super intimate about THEIR relationship cause she respects both his and her sister’s privacy. So you might be stuck on an eavesdropping side quest with Renji that amounts to nothing cause he’ll sense yall. He’ll be amused and somewhat touched you wanted to watch him work though. He’s usually the one keeping check or track of things so he’ll never say he likes that you peep on him and mind his business. You care about him and he knows he’s a bit unfair not allowing any PDA. But he so openly loved on Rukia’s sister he couldn’t help the shameful self imposed embarrassment once he had to walk the halls alone…Byakuya will be a very intentional, quiet lover. I doubt he’ll moan very much tbh unless he’s exhausted and allowing you to take care of him. Sometimes he’ll absolutely disappear all day into work. Other times he’ll be sure to direct his underlings to wait on you in his stead. He’s more manageable if you can accept his sometimes snarky, distant, super private ways. As a father he’ll be annoyingly big on exceptionalism and them being smart and talented. You’ll have to be sure he isn’t burdening your kid when you aren’t around. And you’ll have to be sure he doesn’t inadvertently impart his insensitive habits too. Likewise, you’ll ABSOLUTELY have to “deal or no deal” him about giving affection to your kid in public. You will absolutely have to go off and tell him it’s y’all or his image. And yeah now he’s holding both yall hands albeit defeated. 💕😭

AIZEN: Shit…girl (im black my “girl…” is gender neutral don’t be annoying 💕) you already know what it is. Yandare, selfish, self righteous, MEAN, EVIL…but fine and rich as fuck. 😔🫤 it will be a doozy to be with this one. You literally have to know and accept what you getting into bestie. I can’t even warn you, you know! 😭 but seriously if your an aizen bias you accept him as is 😭 psycho ass. So I wanna just write how’d he be as a baby daddy. Now not to get…too mature…but if you happened to be someone captured/kidnapped by him and pregnant…baby you is a victim! BUT ITS FANFIC SOOO if you were the captured baby momma that’s in his realm with him…well girl you in the realm lord you stuck. “Can I go to the human world?” “For what?” “Uh, sun?” “Humph what do you need sun for…” He’ll look down at your crying child and be like “Ugh okay whatever but Grimmjow is your chaperone.” And you won’t care cause Grimmjow lets you run off and live life. Which Aizen knows but the minute you aren’t overtly scared and submissive to him he’ll lose his weird sense of “power.” You’re man crazy bestie. He’s definitely someone you won’t talk back to until you’re a parent and equally going to advocate for your kid. He’ll realize and laugh to himself “Their not really submissive at all…little minx…” and hold you in completely new regard. “So you took me as is because you wanted to?” He’ll start thinking shit that confuses him and decide to randomly kill a grunt to distract himself like no he’s not gonna reflect into a better person. 😂 you’ll have everything you want cause you can’t go nowhere 😭. Mind you yes the sex is mind blowing so you sadly do take what positives are there…his eyes don’t fall sexually to anyone but you. His body doesn’t respond certain ways to anyone but you. And as you stand next to him more and more he’s leaning into you and your baby’s energy rather than tryna to overtake yall with his. Just don’t speak about the change and it’ll be fine. The minute you tease or openly acknowledge his becoming softer and less controlling you’ll ruin all the progress you made. Let him feel like he’s in control or whatever.

New Additions (1):

Hitsugaya: (adult of course) Hitsu will be a blend of Byakuya and Ichigo. The best aspects of him will be how attentive and actionable he is about his love for you. But — he will shy away from PDA and sometimes have moments of separated solitude. Unlike Byakuya, he will absolutely open up to PDA, just will never be the initiator of it. Maybe grab your hand at the end of the day to hurry back home or stare at you as long as he can while he observes your dutiful working. He’ll be shy always which keeps your love feeling young and refreshed. You’ll always be able to make him blush and unlike Ichigo, he’ll warm up to you imposing yourself on his alone time. He’ll be big on love making and planning when to have a child so it will be less spontaneous. He’ll have the baby registry and wishlists prepared, printed, and passed out to members of the Soul Society. He’ll enjoy trips to the human world to acquire new toys and trinkets for your baby.

As a baby daddy he’s almost too protective. You wonder what he’s been through as he’ll have a firm grip of your hips as you cradle your child. He’ll have a habit of looking at your baby and then between the both of you stunned at how he can see the perfect blend of your features on your child’s face. He’ll be very close to a simp honestly (which I’m a fan of) and be at your beck & call no matter the hour. Definitely the dad to tell you don’t worry about tending to the little one, keep resting cause he knows how tired you get. He’s honestly the perfect idea of a new father as he’ll be bumbling a bit but with so much to prove. I realize I kinda didn’t write red flags cause I truly see Hitsu adjusting to parenthood and a long term relationship the best. Only thing I can think is that he’ll be overtly willing to sacrifice himself for your family’s safety. So any massive issue in the Soul Society will make your heart sink a little because while he’s capable he’s been in enough life threatening predicaments to cause ample, appropriate worry. He’ll be hard to break out of working I think until your child starts schooling which could be frustrating cause he’ll overcompensate parenting in lieu of his work commitments. Overall, I think he’d be the baby daddy with the least to really worry about.

Renji: Oh lord— all tea, all shade this man will STRUGGLE. « What do you mean the baby is hungry AGAIN ? You just breastfed! WAIT DO NOT PULL YOUR TIT OUT IN PUBLIC WOMAN ! » He’ll have a hard time adjusting to your freedom as a breastfeeding mom for sure (if you choose to). Work ? What’s work? One thing you can count on is that he will absolutely commit to being a family man and even a stay at home dad. He’ll take all his PTO or even « quit » (basically will say don’t call me to help unless the Soul Society is about to die.) He will wait on you hand & foot because he can’t imagine how much your body and mind has gone through and the strength it takes to be so tired but smile and laugh with him and your kiddo. But, he may end up a bit controlling about you leaving the house without him. He’ll either become a sad puppy or an angry old man. « Baby…what do you mean you want me to stay home ? 😓🥺 » or «  Woman, what did I tell you about going out without me ? What if a crazy person tried to rob you ? » You laugh at him always being some level of dramatic but it may get annoying how clingy and worried he’ll become. You’ll have to remind him you lived this long for a reason…and plan to live longer, so he can chill out sometimes cause his worried nature worries you…you might benefit from guilt tripping him into apologizing and giving you a breather on leaving the house. But just know someone is watching over you. Renji would be a great cook or a terrible cook who improves over time. He might be great at catching the baby right when they poop or…end up shat on rushing to a sink. I really see him either being weirdly good at being a dad or definitely suffering from the learning curve.

Your baby will definitely be conceived in a wild love making, (maybe rough, passionate sex) session. And you’ll catch him blushing when he holds your baby and looks at you remembering the night you had. You’ll be the type to walk in on them sleeping crazily on the sofa, his arm instinctively holding your baby firm. He’ll be grateful to not have to jump up to go to work honestly. His biggest red flags will be being overbearing, needy, and likely requiring a lot of overt reassurance. (Which isn’t necessarily a red flag given he just will want to be a really good dad and partner.) Otherwise he’ll become a stubborn dad who will try (and fail) to « put his foot down. » Which will likely result in him sleeping on the sofa…💕

[raredust]

Now you may be seeing something right? FGT Ichigo looks kinda a lot like Yhwach.

Now we know Ichigo is a Quincy and all Quincy have Yhwach's blood running in their veins but only Ichigo looks like him to this extent when in his Final Getsuga Tensho.

Both have long dark hair.

Red crimson eyes.

And a handsome fac-

Ahem, I mean this leads me to believe that Ichigo may have been using his Quincy powers while in that state. Hey look, this is just a theory and Kubo may have just thought it's a cool design choice before the Yhwach twist and all but just let me have fun with this one okay!

Now what is Final Getsuga Tensho specifically? Some believe it's Ichigo absorbing all of Zangetsu's powers but I disagree. I think FGT is more of a fusion between them. Getsuga Tensho is a technique using Zangetsu's powers and only Ichigo can call upon the technique, it cannot be used by Zangetsu without its wielder or Ichigo without his weapon. And my proof is this line by Ichigo:

He is fighting with Zangetsu, not using him.

And there's also the fact that Zangetsu was literally fused to his hand.

Now then that we established that, let's get to this point.

Final Getsuga Tensho is not just a final technique. It's also a combination of all of Ichigo's powers. Both Shinigami, Hollow and Quincy. And why is that?

When Ichigo was fighting Zangetsu he was fighting both his Quincy (in Young lad Zangetsu) Hollow/Shinigami (In white Ichigo) in a fused state. And achieving FGT is him basically accepting both powers, and making himself a weapon for a short time, becoming Getsuga itself.

Heck we talked about his design resembling Yhwach why not talk about how his design resembles a Hollow in how the mask wraps around half of his face with little teeth and how the black spirit energy is like his Tensa Zangetsu's Getsuga Tensho (shinigami power) only strengthening my thought about it not just being a final technique/attack but a fusion of all of his powers, both mastered and latent (which is why Ishinn had Ichigo do it, not him. His wouldn't probably match Aizen)

And the nail in the coffin is what Aizen says here.

Aizen here is beyond Quincy, Shinigamis, Hollows and humans, no one can stand up to him. He's on a higher plane than all beings except Ichigo. Who overpowered him with ease, who's on a higher plane than he is.

There's only one being that can be on a higher plane than the Quincy,Hollows,Shinigami:

Yhwach, the Quincy King, the Almighty. He's the only one who could over power aizen that much and without even trying.

Now I am not saying that Ichigo is somehow using the Almighty powers, that's stupid. I am saying that he was using his Quincy powers which are from Yhwach himself. Fusing it with his other abilities to make Aizen look like a joke.

And even then, FGT is probably just an imperfect version of Ichigo's final form he used against Yhwach. Because FGT is used when Ichigo didn't fully realize and unlock his Quincy powers/Blood. And that it's a one shot weapon where he can use it only once and lose all his powers after whereas his final form where he realizes and mastered all of his powers he uses to its fullest potential and doesn't just disappear.

And that it looked like how Zangetsu looks like when he was fighting him for the Final Getsuga Tensho.

And all of this leads me to believe that Ichigo was using his Quincy powers there and that's how he overpowered Aizen that easily, especially in base.

TL;DR FGT is just an imperfect Final form that Ichigo uses against Yhwach in chapter 676.

Good night or Good morning 👍.

NaruHina 4ever

Petition to call Tensa Zangetsu YoungMan Zangetsu.

But remember. That's just a theory, a game theory. Thanks for watching.

[zoroara]

Your only context is: I've been watching bleach for the first time, I know only what I have been told about him by @moonlit-mystery-writer and I have only seen like 10 seconds of him. I said I would properly draw and finish this when I saw Mayuri for the first time so I march forward regardless.

Also based on this fucking post

Other note, he is REALLY fun to draw

[bloqdies]

You can do it with this photo? Pls

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[my-my-my]

We love to see it.

[bankaizen]

KUCHIKI BYAKUYA — BLEACH: THOUSAND-YEAR BLOOD WAR

[vivinism]

i’m still praying for

that house in Nebraska

[yu2ki]

nelliel my beloved

[stardaiyamondo]

⠀⠀⠀𓏹 ͜⠀⠀ ۪ㅤ⠀#ulquiorraㅤ‧ㅤ◾