#bort swordsmen

[tgirlhawkins]

kiss the melon

if u don't know what. th fuck is going on this is the furry au, kyoho is a beluga whale and buntan is a snow leopard. this is not their canon size difference in the thing i just was not thinking

[chojuuro]

Hi des!! 21, 23, 24, 42 mayhaps??

naruto ask game!

hi mila!! : D

21. favorite scene

idk if this counts bc it's like three episodes BUT the sannin fight in part 1, when orochimaru's arms are sealed and naruto is still trying to get tsunade to come back to the village with him and jiraya? so good SO SO GOOD... or fuck the scene in kabuto's backstory ep in shippuden where he beats the fuck out of orochimaru makes me feel so many ways. so so many ways. even the dub of it is really good.

AHEM if i can bort for a second it's the scene when chojuuro fights the new ninja swordsmen no i won't elaborate but it's right here and i think about it a normal healthy regular amount (it makes me insane)

23. favorite hairstyle in the series

THIS MIGHT BE OUTTA LEFT FIELD BUT ameyuri ringo. i wanna know wtf is up with her hair. it's so weird. so vertical. i love it (ALSO GENGETSU I LOVE HIS STUPID POMPADOUR)

24. favorite character design

is it cheating to say chojuuro. i just think he's neat. hes so CUTE with his lil cow print pants.....

OTHER THAN HIM genuinely i think shino's designs were all really really good?? genin shino. shippuden shino. BLANK PERIOD SHINO. im a big fan of new era shino. his designs never miss i love him

42. one dead character can come back—who would you choose and why? keep in mind how this would affect the series

HEAR ME OUT canon loses nothing from mangetsu being dead. suigetsu can still think he's dead. but bring him back let him say one (1) word.

WAIT NO OR NONOU OOF HER DEATH MAKES ME ACTUALLY INSANE (DEROGATORY) hearrtwrenching and OwNO WAIT UFCK

AO. BRING AO BACK HE LITERALLY DIDN'T HAVE TO DIE OR BECOME AN ANTAGONIST i havent seen that arc yet but like. why didn't konoha reach out to kiri and be like "hey uh ao is still super alive btw"

i love being Normal

[forgivememadreforihavesinned]

I feel like you ought to know that Raiga was shown among the other Seven Swordsmen when they got talked about in the most recent bort episode

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

...Woah hold on wait a minute. Kushimaru, Jinin and Hiramekarei‘s first wielder are all supposed to be SEVERAL YEARS DEAD by the time Zabuza inherits the sword from Juzo.

Why would they have Zabuza there instead of Juzo...

Was Juzo’s arc in the anime really just an ‘What if he survived Might Dai’s attack’ AU scenario after all?

God fucking damn it.

but also YAY RAIGA

[tgirlhawkins]

halloween drawing 3! the bort swordsmen, they are so special to me. hassaku is a catboy, buntan is a werewolf, kagura is a vampire, kyoho is a ghost, hebiichigo is a witch, and ichirota is dorian grey. i stole that idea from a costume party i went to and i should have done the corrupted makeup on the other side bc he looks like he’s trying to be obito. hebiichigo did everyone’s makeup and sewed kyoho’s sheet :>

[tgirlhawkins]

idk how to put all the info on here

this is a bort swordsmen fic post-second arc, some people live au. it’s ~2500 words. suigetsu is there. he has a car

[tgirlhawkins]

what if ichirota is a fucking kaguya

like obviously not a full-blooded one who had been living with that family but if one member of the clan had ran away and had baby. that could have been him

[tgirlhawkins]

me putting the bort swordsmen in furry au: >:3c

me making shizuma and buntan date again, knowing he’s going to betray and hurt her again: :’(

[tgirlhawkins]

swordsmen and their stims

(warning that a lot of these are Not healthy and several are unsanitary. im not condoning these as healthy coping mechanisms or anything, i’m simply making headcanons for a largely dead swathe of fictional murderers)

old generation:

zabuza: tears the ends of his bandages and headband, then tugs at the resulting threads. he’s on like headband strap 7 when we see him in land of waves. also in the cowprint outfit he pets the cow skin and runs his thumb under the strap.

haku (not technically a swordsman but shh): fiddles with senbon, rips/crunches herb leaves (but has to moderate this behavior so his fingers don’t smell too strongly.) if there are dry leaves on the ground tho he Must crunch them. he doesn’t like doing this in zabuza’s presence at first because he has to be a weapon!! but zabuza crunches them first to show him it’s ok, at least while they’re just travelling.

ameyuri: bites/chews on things!! will chew her sleeves or arm if there isn’t anything else, but has been known to tear bark off of a stick and chew on that. also repeats phrases, often under her breath and out of context (like yes she talks about stalking her prey when she’s chasing targets but also while she’s walking around the grocery store)

raiga: puts his fingers in and out of his silly gloves. tears anything and everything that he’s not wearing. touches the dull or flat parts of blades, jsut like rubbing his index finger on them. scratches himself, sometimes shocks himself with small amounts of electricity. and then there’s murder and untold destruction

mangetsu: fills up the tub and submerges himself in water. bounces on his toes. kind of inverse flaps? like instead of flapping his hands up by his head he’ll throw them at his sides like he’s dramatically trying to make a point but he’s not he just does that. will swing his arms by his sides too. practicing sword forms All The Time, and when a sword is not available he will make a water clone and have it transform into one. he can’t do this for v long tho bc the balance is never quite right :(

suigetsu: used to bounce too, but loses this post-orochimaru because he just doesn’t have the energy anymore. rocks back and forth when sitting and standing. shapeshifts!! into horrors! like he shapeshifts himself fur or scales when he needs something nice to touch. there’s also swimming but he has a love-hate relationship with that one for obvious reasons

kisame: pets samehada!! maintaining its bandages is a Good activity for him, even if cleaning gore from between its blades is not. grabbing the handle and swinging his elbow while he’s walking. recites shark facts in his head or verbally. 

chojuro: mei helps him get actual toys after the revolution when the economy opens up a little. he has a little silicon thing to chew on! and some worry stones that have strings tied through them that he can tug on, two-in-one type of thing. 

juzo: chews his lips. ties a bandage in a loop and fiddles them between his fingies (he offers this to itachi as well when they’re traveling together.) puts a finger through a kunai and flips it around. while wearing kubikiribocho sometimes he’ll rub the back of his head against the dull end.

kushimaru: picks his skin!! tugs at his neck bandages all the time. needlepoints. breaks thread on his fingers and/or on a blade very slowly so he can see the individual . tells himself jokes in his head and laughs at them

jinpachi: those ball things in his hair? always in his mouth. incidentally chews on his hair. bites his nails. his ultimate stim activity he’s not able to do v often though is starting a wood fire, he’ll stare at it for hours. if wood isn’t available he’ll use something else but it’s not as good :(

jinin: scratches his beard to the point of skin irritation. also picks at split ends and cracks knuckles, but to see him doing any of this is pretty rare.

new generation: 

shizuma: touches people!! esp exposed skin and hair. if he’s by himself he’ll talk to himself or scream, but he doesn’t do a lot of stim activities otherwise.

buntan: she touches grass!! goes out and plays with dirt, feels those natural textures. also has nice candles to smell. there are certain smells, like the same kind of alcohol her mom used to drink, that upset her, so controlling what she’s smelling is important to her. she’ll also lie down on the ground. horizontal time yes yes

hebiichigo: picks/scratches her skin (got that one from stripesquadsideblog) and also drawing on herself. just scribbles. there are seals on the insides of all her clothes sometimes by accident bc she’ll draw them on herself and they’ll rub off.

kyoho: rocks back and forth (this one kind of happens in canon iirc), cracks his knuckles, hums to himself. if he’s invited to he’ll pet people’s hair but he’s not as forward about it as shizuma is. very rarely he’ll put his fingers in his mouth, whether to chew on them or to feel the inside of his cheek.

ichirota: not so much outwardly stimming as running countless plans and things through his head at all times. if he’s deep into it he’ll snap at whoever’s interrupting. also cracks his knuckles but he hates it. 

hassaku: chews gum. rubs the underside of his neck. he has a little bit of stubble he likes to touch. sometimes he talks aggressively to himself, and it’s like two coherent words and then nonsense.

kagura: he hums and squeaks! tries to only when he’s alone but u know, things happen. hugs himself, plays w/ a bouncy ball from time to time. hand shaking for immediate maintenance. if he had one of those plastic tangles he would be the happiest boy.

[tgirlhawkins]

it’s time to appreciate hebiichigo

[tgirlhawkins]

tw boruto great kiri battle spoilers

the kiba can float, without buntan having to touch or throw them. im halfway convinced the bort writers forgot about this and halfway thinking they just didn’t want to let buntan kill people because god forbid a woman ever do anything

im sorry the tone of this is very sarcastic but i was drawing really sad things about our boy yesterday so this is me flushing that out

[tgirlhawkins]

feeling feral and stupid about shizuma and buntan holding hands and kissing and bun wanting to kill him with her bare hands and keeping what he did away from hebii because she didn’t want her to feel angry like she does and saying she knows wanting to kill him is pointless and stupid and won’t bring her joy but just like doesn’t have any idea of what else she’s going to do so that’s what she’s got

[tgirlhawkins]

some takes from me and my friend watching the first boruto kiri arc (it’s her first time watching boruto!! i snagged another one lads)

*

her, about sarada: she’s got sasuke’s personality, and sakura’s gender

*

me, about kagura: ITS’ THE BOY!!!

her: is he the boy?

me: he’s like 30% boy. but yeah he is The boy

*

her when shizuma shows up: SPEAKING of GENDER!!

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me explaining shizuma’s deal: he shows kagura his tits and goes ‘remember who you AAarRE’

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her: the explosion blade, uhh grape, and the not smart guy

*

(after buntan’s backstory)

her: raiga caught the moon in a cup too. he banged that lady and then caught the moon, then left and forgot he had sex

[tgirlhawkins]

boruto 24uhhh what episode are we on

boruto great kiri battle spoilers

the first five or so minutes of this episode were bullshit so I’m going to do a wee bit of rewriting

chojuro in this ep talks about knowing about the land squad of funato soldiers going to kiri, so i think at some point several episodes ago he calls in suigetsu (who has been established to be working for kiri even in his sad orochimaru job, it’s in the first arc if you squint.) can you go help my little guys cut them off at the pass? i trust them but there are only like 10 of em against at least 50 guys

suigetsu gets there in the nick of time, helping in the battle in the ravine and at the town. i think. he could fucking jump into the water spout and try to make it calm down. alternatively he gets sucked up in the spout at the beginning but because he’s 100% water and not 60% he doesn’t die and it just takes him a second to get control of it. meanwhile funamushi slips out and grabs kagura, makes his stupid little speech and stabs him. suigetsu helps sarada and iwabe try to stabilize him while boruto handles funamushi.

kagura isn’t doing great but he’s nowhere near dying. he makes his little take care of the town speech, boruto i leave this to you, and suigetsu whisks him away back to kiri for treatment. probably after saying something sarcastic to mitsuki.

the parts are still there, they’re just less stupid.

also if they wanted to bring suigetsu back he could use hiremeikari and talk about using his brother’s sword!!! we could have it all!!!!

[tgirlhawkins]

shizuma joins a pirate gang and immediately starts manufacturing sexual tension

[tgirlhawkins]

here are today’s thoughts and feelings

[tgirlhawkins]

ameyuri reincarnated into hebiichigo au