Didn't want a Dog, now I have Three !!!
I never wanted dogs. I know that by saying that, I sound like a terrible person, but it wasn’t just dogs, I didn’t want pets in general. Personally, I just didn’t see the logic of getting a pet, especially during college, everything is already super expensive. If I got a dog, I would need to buy it things, not mentioning the vet bills, apartment pet deposit or any damages done by the dog. Also, pets need attention, love, time, and that’s almost impossible if I’m working or in class, I would feel bad. The point is I didn’t want a pet, maybe when I graduated, or when I thought having one would be less work, I didn’t want the responsibility.
The problem was I started dating someone I really liked, and he had a dog named, Bristol. Bristol hates everybody except my boyfriend, I mean she can tolerate people/other dogs, but for the most part she rather be by herself with my boyfriend on a beach somewhere alone. This dog is a 15 years old, chihuahua/Pomeranian mix, who is filled with so much attitude it borders on hateful. This dog hated me, but I couldn’t take it personal, since it hated everybody else too. Now my boyfriend (lets call him James) loves this dog, I mean this dog has been with him for 15 years, he loves this dog. I wasn’t that big into dogs, I had one as a kid, love it, it died, and I haven’t had one since. My parents took care of my childhood dog, Chona, so I had fond memories of her, but not compare to people who do the grunt work.
Bristol
Anyway, James and I moved into the same apartment, a studio apartment, super small with the kitchen, living room and bedroom all in one open space, the restroom had the only door, so yeah it sucked. Bristol was new to me, when I moved in, I didn’t have a job (that’s how you know James loved me lol) so all my time was spend with her, she kept to herself and expected me to do the same, unless she needed to potty (go to the restroom). Like I said before, I never wanted another dog, I didn’t want the responsibility, and Bristol wasn’t my dog, but we spend a lot of time together, at that point she was 13, still old, but still playful (with James not me). Since she didn’t care for me, she would never cuddle, always bark when I tried to hold her, and never listen me.
I want to point out, I never hated this dog, but that didn’t mean I was always thrilled to wake up to one who hated me. Also, Bristol wasn’t like an ugly T-Shirt James had that I could convince him to throw out (not that I ever wanted too). I was simply uninterested in doing the dog person responsibilities, I didn’t want to walk it or take it out to pee or basically be considerate of it, I just wanted to be responsible of me. I know how ridicules all of this sounds, but I thought it was interesting how people fall in love and then change, not for someone else, but because of someone else.
James loves dogs obviously, but he loves just about any other pet too, he ones convinced me to get four baby ducks at a Tractor Supply Store. Well he didn’t convince me, more like I said, “no they’ll poo everywhere”, and he took that as gets four baby ducks while I’m at work, because there cute. They eventually found a good home, just not with us.
Bristol is old, she will eventually move on, and James knows this, but obviously isn’t thrilled about it, I know this too, and while I eventually have gotten to the point of loving Bristol in my own way, I will be sad in a different way than James. I am terrible with sad events and originally, I look up on ways to help people grieving over lost pets, as a precaution, I wanted to be prepared So I would know exactly what to do. Not that me knowing would really change much, but I did read an article that said getting the person another dog after the loss of one, would feel like they are replacing the one that died.
I read that sometimes it helps to have a dog that knew the old one, that meant getting another dog. I talked to James about it and we agreed that it was something to think about. James knew I didn’t’ really cared for dogs, so he was basically asking me to think about it, because James of course wanted the dog. That’s how we ended up with Whiskey, a nervous dog, a little shy and very sweet, but Bristol didn’t care for her, since Bristol hated everybody, but they learned to live together. However, Whiskey was lonely, Bristol was too old to play and fragile, and while Whiskey was super sweet towards Bristol, you could tell she wanted Bristol to pay attention to her too. So again, me and James talked, I said “let’s get a fluffy dog this time.”
Whiskey
Well I went to pick one out at a dog Rescue, but she turned out to not be fluffy at all, she was definitely mix with a dachshund and honestly wasn’t my first choice, but she kept looking at me with sad eyes and I just couldn’t say no. Also, I felt like James would love this one too, but the best part was that she and Whiskey seemed like old friends. We named that one Ruby. Three dogs.
Ruby
The funny thing is that I didn’t realize I had three dogs until I did, if that makes any sense and it was interesting to say the least, all of them had their own personalities. The weird part was that I can honestly say I love them, its weird to say that, because I just never thought I has the potential to care about something that isn’t human. I know that’s strange, but it was just an unexpected positive in my life.
Together
Links to Articles about pet Loss:
10 Ways to Heal After Losing a Pet
Coping with the death of your pet
Coping with Losing a Pet
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You’re not even a boyfriend, you’re kind of like a dog.
Comparison writing prompts
with @rainb0wdild0
inspired by this list
Sweat, so much sweat. The sun, perched high in the sky, gave a promise of nothing else. Clouds were nowhere to be seen, just as it had been for the past three days. Ava reached to wipe the back of her hand over her forehead. As her hand came into view she found it pink, running down in little beads of moisture. Nothing she could do about the blood on her face, little she wanted to do. The more dead you looked or smelled, the more they ignored you.
"At least I smell better than you." Her voice was soft, hoarse, as she spoke her thoughts. "Can't say it's an improvement. You-" A rustle in the trees would cause Ava to pause, turing to look behind her and sounding off a 'shh' as if her companion would listen. Her eyes, dedicated scopes that took in the buildings, waiting for a sign. A sound, movement.. something was there. "Couldn't be the wind.." Her voice was even too soft for her company to hear, her senses not yet satisfied enough to stop searching. Ava's hand would reach to her belt, looping her fingers in the knuckle piece of her short blade. She trusted nothing. No one. That was the world now. Be ready for blood.
Minutes would pass and she'd begin walking once more, tugging on the rope of her companion. "Just tell me if you see something, okay?" The response was silence, a tug at the rope. "Keep up, we're close."
Ava's gaze would now be fixated on her destination again, a big red sign reading "bar" in white letters. Maybe it was a stupid thing - to want a drink of something other than water - but, when you find yourself alone, wandering the streets with the possibility of death around every corner... How could one not need a buzz from time to time?
As she entered the doorway, she whistled out, trying to draw out any dead that could later surprise her. Finding it empty, she'd walk along the clean floor, tying off her companion to a stool and making her way in further to the back of the narrow bar. There were few bottles left, but they were clean and lined up together. Actually, the whole room looked too clean.. "Hello?" The girl would try again, pulling her knife free from her belt.
When nothing came, she'd turn to the moaning dead and raise a brow. "Do you want to buy me a drink?" She'd chuckle then sigh. "Never had to ask that one before. People used to offer. I used to be sexy. Believe it or not.. craved by people." The girl would grab a bottle and turn her eyes to the body on the leash, sighing and putting on a over exaggerated tone of happiness. "You know, you listen so well. You're like a good boyfriend or something. Those are hard to come by. Not that I ever looked before, but you hear of these people who corner themselves into something to be with someone else and it's like.. crazy, you know?" She'd take a swig from the bottle, face contorting to one of disgust as the burn took her tongue and throat. "Damn.." She'd cough a bit and shake her head. "You know, you're not even a boyfriend, you're kind of like a dog.. Decent listener, doesn't respond, sure as hell am never going to do anything sexual.. so, a dog." Ava would sigh and turn her back to it as she hoisted herself up on the bar, setting her blade aside.
Her dirty fingers would pick up and empty matchbook, a smile forming as she shook her head. "Bar." She'd say flatly. This simple place had seriously called themselves 'Bar'. "Do you think they do that because people in the south are dumb? I mean, in New York people didn't just say 'bar'. It sounds stupid.."
"Maybe they're smarter for not giving a shit about marketing with some stupid name."
The words, though relaxed, ran down Ava's spine like nails on a chalkboard. When was the last time she'd heard another voice? Nothing had sounded in her ear but her own voice and the constant soft moaning of her newly decided pet. She'd jump from the counter, blade again in her grasp as she let the bottle fall to the floor, spilling out.
"Thanks, that was the last of my tequila." The man would say with a definite sigh, holding a small gun in her direction. “A-Ava?” His voice would sound with surprise.
“How the fuck do you know my name?”
“I, we met, months ago, I was the one you saved when I ran out of bullets. In that alley.. you dragged me out and stole my water and left me for your friends.” The man would look around again. "You alone." He'd ask, his cheeks covered in blood. Fresh blood...
"No, I walk with this thing for fun." She would gesture to the side, careless to her attitude as she recalled him. Not like you could forget anyone these days. Especially when you treated them like shit.
His eyes would leave her to look over it for but a second. "Why do you walk with it?"
"No teeth, no hands, you take those and he can't hurt me. Does nothing but stink up where I am. Hides me. That way I don't have to do that anymore." Ava would gesture to his clothes with hope. "Unless that's human blood. You a killer now?"
He seemed to think about her information regarding her zombie-scented air freshener, but relay no answer to her question. "Are you alone?"
"Are you?" She would retort just as fast.
The semi-stranger would seem shocked and smirk a bit. "I have a gun."
"Congrats."
"Could kill you for not answering me."
"You could kill me anyway. If for no other reason than for stealing your stuff.." She'd point out. “Besides, unless you’ve changed, I don’t think you would.”
"Could though." He'd nod. "I'm not alone, I came to town on a run with a friend. And I'm going to say it's safe to say you are. Obviously, you're desperate for conversation..."
"Someone told me once that talking helps keep your mind right. Turns out people really do need people." The man would step forward and nod, but Ava would step back. "Stay where you are, asshole." She'd grit her teeth, ready for a fight.
"Hey, it’s okay, you know me, Ava.. Besides, you’re the one who treats others like shit, remember? And you said you needed people."
"Not many of the good ones left."
He'd sit at the bar, letting her hide behind her blade. He'd set his gun on the wood and nod to the bottles. "Whiskey?”
Ava would keep a stubborn eye on him and say nothing. The man would sigh, getting up and walking around the bar, helping himself to a cup and his choice of alcohol before returning to the stool. All the while he was followed by the tip of her knife. "So, wanna talk?"
"You should leave me alone." She'd say lightly, not really wanting that at all, but there was such little trust left.
He'd take a drink and shake his head. "I don't think you want me to. I could help you."
She'd look at him there, cool as he poured his drink, blood of the dead covering his shirt, and the spaces of his cheeks that were free of facial hair. Steel shining eyes.. "You help me how? Do you have water?"
"I have water. But, more than that, I have hot showers, food, beds, walls... people."
The words would wash over Ava like something of a dream. A warm shower... "And?"
"I just need something from you."
"Sex? Are you going to try and rape me? Because I swear to your god, I will not let that happen. Your blood or mine, I don't fucking care - my body.."
But his head was already shaking, hands up in defense of her accusations. "No, hey, whoa. I'm actually a good guy.. alright? Well, decent anyway."
"Then what the fuck could you need? I don't even have a backpack.. I've got nothing else to give you."
"Just sit with me, talk, let me know you didn’t go bat shit crazy. You know, the kind of girl who talks to and leads a dead person to a bar and has a conversation, tries to get it to buy her a drink.."
"You make me sound pathetic. Like I took him on a date."
"Well, he'd be a horrible date if you did. I bet he wouldn't even pay, just stare at you like a piece of meat.." He'd grin, the crinkles by his eyes showing through the cracked, drying blood. "Remember my name?"
Okay, this guy really wasn't so bad, right? He was seemingly nice, making her want to smile. That hadn't happened in.. hell, she didn't want to think about it. "No..” She’d lie.
"I'm Elliot." He'd reply with a nod. "How long you been alone."
"I don't.." She'd think about it, about the fire that took the last of her friends away and she'd become speechless.
"Hey, hey, take a breath, drink this." The man would look closely as she obeyed, looking desperate as she did so. "It's okay, we can talk one step at a time, but I've got to know some stuff, that's all."
"How can I trust you?"
"You don't have the luxury not to. But, if you'd rather be alone I can let you go."
Let her go.. as if he had control over her actions. People these days..
"Come on.. Let me repay the favor of you saving my life." He'd pour her another shot and nod to it. "Talk to me. You have other weapons?"
"I have enough." Stubborn as always. “And you did when I took that water..”
"Okay.. Humor me then. How many dead have you killed."
“Lost count.”
“And humans?”
After a long beat of silence, Ava lowered her knife. “Four.” She’d step in and take the drink, eyes clenching again with the taste. It had been so long that the few shots already tickled her brain. “I don’t want to talk about-”
“No, I just have to ask.. I remember you. I think you’re a good person. I want to take you with me.”
“Why..?”
“Because, Ava. You could die out here.”
“And you think it’s safe with you?”
“I happen to know it is...”
A wall in Ava threatened to crumble, to lie in ruins and expose her for the broken person she was. So many dead, so little in the world she had any control over. Apparently the emotions came to her face because the look Elliot held softened until he looked away. “What do you miss most?” The man would sound, taking her from her current thoughts to give her something a little more bittersweet. An idea Ava clung to; was thankful for.
“Um.. food. Pizza, Indian food, ice cream..”
He’d smile and pour himself a drink wit a nod. “That’s a good one.” He’d shrug.
“What do you miss?”
“Sex.” He’d chuckle, bringing a smile to her face. Funny how he could sit covered in blood and the words would still all be so normal.
“Oh, that’s almost better.” She’d actually chuckle. “Flirting.. texting even.”
“Music.”
“Traveling.”
“Parties.”
“Cereal.”
The man would laugh. “You said food.”
She’d give a small smile and shrug back. “Cereal is special.”
He’d nod to her and begin a serious tone again. “Come with me..”
The girl would stare at him for a long time. To trust him could be to be a sheep led to a lion’s den. But what was the difference anymore? Life, death, they were now one and the same. “Okay.. I’ll go.”
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