#brendon would probably die otherwise

[dont-hug-me-its-yuri]

who do you think in dhmis cant cook/bake anything at all and if they try they would burn the whole place down :3

I think most of the teachers aren't really good at cooking, but I think Lamp would be the worst at cooking

The others don't let him within five feet of a stove Because it will explode if he even touches it

Also self-indulgent Coffin thing, I think he's not the best cook but he's actually pretty good at baking

[dropverses]

Cian, info from @/ashkinoshita

still relevant :

is incredibly possessive & is overly protective over people he’s close to

has Borderline Personality Disorder, autism and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder

has Body Dysmorphic Disorder

depends on others to function emotionally, spirals otherwise

takes mood stabilizers, gets incredibly suicidal without them

prefers being in unhealthy relationships

is not flexible at all

refuses to admit being in the wrong & blames others for everything

has no friends

tries to play up his appearance to seem intimidating

doesn’t consume alcohol

as a dragon it has no effect on him

has severe misophonia

gets overwhelmed in social situations easily, is drained by social interaction

enjoys archery, but would be horrible at it

his chest tightens when he goes through a lot of emotion

is Irish, born in Ireland

hates the feeling of makeup on him

is kind of a brat

is quick to think he is wronged

often switches between hypersexual and sex repulsed

has a superiority complex

gets upset when others brush his hair

is against polyamory

has insomnia & pulls a lot of all nighters

is always cold but will pass out if he gets too hot

hes an ice elemental so...

his vocal tone changes regularly even if he doesn’t mean it

would cut off his hair during a breakdown

prone to severe sunburns in his more human forme

doesn’t eat a lot since he dislikes it

works in the medical field

prefers animals to humans, would die for animals

enjoys the taste of blood

has a tail : )

paces around a lot

has hyperdontia

hates socializing, is very touch averse

wears facial masks

obsesses over things

has multiple lizards and snakes

has sympathy and empathy problems

is prone to temper tantrums

has short & straight hair

has thin lips

enjoys shiny things

has resting bitch face

has never been kissed

often yells at others when angry

would run a hate blog, but doesn’t use the internet

can sing, technically

graduated from medical school

wears sweaters frequently

has tried using teeth as currency

dislikes children

hisses when hurt

major back seat driver

enjoys mystery books

hates cheesy romcoms

is ooooold

very, very clean

would run a medical blog

outdated :

would harass others due to loss of contact

hes aware enough to understand why people would cut off contact with him

reacts poorly to being rejected

see above

ghosts others maliciously

has a drug addiction

drugs do not affect him as a dragon

intentionally misgenders others

hes trans and wouldnt do that

is a fae

hes just a dwagon now

thinks abusing his partner is love

a stalker

shaves regularly

hes a dragon and doesnt need to shave

is cannibalistic

has freckles

the freckles are actually scales

wears makeup daily

he hates the feeling of it

smokes

hes a dragon, it doesnt affect him

is an ass about his religious beliefs

he no longer has any religious beliefs

other tidbits written by his first owner :

“cian splits and probably becomes hostile/physically aggressive with who abandons them”

“cian is really pushy and mean with their crush”

“cian views sebastian as a rival. but again, it’s out of hatred and sebastian doesn’t see it like that”

“cian will throw big fits and hurt others in the process”

“cian: goes from male to female to nonbinary”

“cian hates ash because theyre on good terms with brendon (who pities them). cian hates everyone on good terms with brendon. theyve actually tried smothering ash to death because of it”

“only cian, and they probably performed the surgery themself (dont question a dragon) or at least did a lot of it on their own. unfortunately they do not show off any skin. these scars will never be shown the light of day”

“cians covered in tattoos/markings. theyre because cian is an Actual    Dragon”

“cian has a higher pitched voice, its very soft. they usually sound upset if not bored, and they usually speak quickly unless theyre putting emphases on their words, though when they speak like that they sound even angrier (an example being when someone asks them to repeat what they said)”

“cian?? cian is just always angry. they want brendon to themself and they want to be left alone. thats all”

“cian has been responsible for deaths of people surrounding brendon.. they are very possessive”

“cian goes full on dragon pokemon (AND I AM PROUD). they would probably have hydreigon, garchomp, noivern, dragonite, dragalge, and haxorus. cians team is my team”

“cian messes around with sebastian. they just subtly say things that put him down. they generally act very mean to him. they also go out of their way to hurt ash for interacting with brendon. theyve tried smothering ash”

“cian really really hates crying. especially ash crying. cian generally hates most noises people make but crying is a big one thatll get them angry”

“cian is. theyre generally a huge ass to everyone but they are pretty Fucking Shallow. however they dont really bring it to anyone else its more something they keep to themself”

“cian would be a cranky alligator”

[polite-quail]

Untitled vore story

vore story I was working on for a while, around 1.4k words

multiple preys, safe vore, soft vore, mentions of digestion and death (none happens)

It was around 3 am on a Tuesday night Mia was walking home from work. she heard a branch snap which at first made her jump. She turned around and expected to see someone but saw nothing just darkness and trees. She just thought it was her mind playing tricks on her but couldn't stop worrying. While she was distracted thinking about the branch she forgot to look where she was going and bumped into someone. Mia got all flustered and felt bad for not paying attention 

“Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry! I wasn't looking where I was going and i-i'm so sorry I bumped into you and, and... ” she said but he just chuckled lightly. 

“it's ok, don't worry about it. I wasn't really paying attention either” Mia looked up to see someone a few heads taller than her smiling down and holding her arms reassuringly. 

“You look tired,” the man said observantly, “actually I have a question if you don't mind me asking… Why are you out in the woods so late at night? It's not safe out here” 

“I was just coming home from a late night at work and took the shortcut through the woods.” she said slightly hesitant “Why are you out in the woods so late? ‘It's not safe out here’” 

He didn't really feel the need to answer Mia's question fully. “Ha. Funny” Lincon said as he leaned in closer as if to intimidate her. it worked. After all, he did have at least 5 inches of height on her.

Mia had many red flags about him from his response. Questions running through her mind ‘who is this guy? Why is he out in the dark?’ 

The man then spoke up once more breaking her train of thought. “What's your name? I'm Lincon”

Mia began to feel a bit uncomfortable standing in front of him. She almost wanted to scream and yell for help but she knew that would be overreacting at this point so she just began to quickly walk away. Lincon noticed and wanted to clear things up.

“No wait I'm sorry I just want to talk with you. I didn't mean to freak you out.” Lincon said walking back towards her, at this point mia was even more nervous. As Mia was walking away Lincon reached out forgetting about his magic problem that's been going on for a little over a month. Lincon tried to stop Mia from running but when he caught up to her and gently grabbed her wrist. She spun around fear and worry in her eyes. 

“Please don't run. I promise I won't hurt you,” Lincon said. trying his best to keep her calm. mia had even more red flags because she now had a strange thing touching her. She was visibly afraid and uncomfortable. 

Lincon wasn't paying attention and didn't realize he was using his magic until he saw that mia was shrinking. After a few seconds, Mia began to feel dizzy and light-headed.

soon she was about 2 and a half inches tall and trying to hide behind a rock. that was a little bit taller than she was. unfortunately for her Lincon could quite easily spot her. as soon as he picked her up she started to shake as she now realized how vulnerable she was. 

“hey hey please don't be scared I'm not trying to hurt you, I just want to get to know you” 

“please l-let me g-go”

“I would but you'd probably get eaten by a bird by morning” Lincon was trying his best to sound soothing but with a deep voice like his it was hard to sound gentle. it also didn't help that he was probably getting sick. 

mia started to whimper as she was lifted higher towards his face. He was so much bigger than her even if she was at her full height. 

“oh gosh please don't start crying, I swear I didn-” Lincon stopped, looked up and head movements coming from a little to his left. most animals were sleeping by now so it was most likely not an animal the same with humans, that worried him.  

Lincon began eyeing her, almost… measuring her small frame. She felt a bit self-conscious as she now had a man holding her and eyeing at her like she was a piece of candy. 

there was another snap before Lincon pulled mia up closer towards his face and opened his mouth. he stopped for a second and whispered

“don't be scared” 

Mia was roughly tossed into Lincoln's mouth. As soon as he threw Mia inside his mouth his eyes widened at her delectable sweet taste. He couldn't help but silently sigh in pleasure at her taste. He didn't want to have to swallow her but he had to. her squirms and protests didn't make it any better. it just put even more of her taste onto his tongue. but he had to keep it moving along. As he heard another step he quickly tilted his head back and swallowed. Being half shapeshifter half wizard had its perks. 

“Lincon? Someone told me you might be lurking around the forest. You here dude?”

‘Oh it was just Brendon. Wait, shit the girl. Play it cool. Nothing happened. Or should I tell him? No that's crazy, he’ll think you're insane. But, he knows I'm a wizard so he knows it's possible, maybe. We’ll see.’  

“Yeah i'm here. What's up Brendon” 

“Oh there you are. Were you just talking to someone? I thought I heard you say something.” Brendon asked

“No.” Lincon said bluntly eyes wide with slight worry visible in his eyes. This made Brendon a little worried. What was Lincon not telling him?

“You sure. Cause that look in your eyes says otherwise.”

“Yep. I'm sur-oof-” it was pretty obvious that Lincon was lying. Not just from the look in his eyes but the fact that he just doubled over in pain or discomfort

“Lincon come on, you know you can trust me.”

This made Lincon crack under pressure. “Mmmm, fine. I may or may not have accidentally shrunkayounggirlthenateher.”

Brendon stood silent for a moment. “I-I'm sorry, could you run that by me one more time.”

“You heard me.” at this point Lincon was embarrassed and afraid that Brendon would just walk away and never speak with him again. 

“Right. Ummm, first question, is she ok.”

“what, oh yeah I would never hurt-oof- AGAIN? REALLY.”

“Ok… not gonna lie, I'm not sure what to do in this situation.” 

Lincon seemed to be in a lot of pain, well he did eat a young girl who probably doesn't realize that she's not going to die. 

“Hnnggg. I mean you're probably not gonna like my idea. But I do-”

“Go for it.” Brendon interrupted, trying to sound brave but failing. Brendon just wanted to help his friend even though he had no idea what he was signing up for. 

“Alright, if you could calm her down that’d be great. It'd keep me out of a lot of pain right now.”

“Huh. not exactly what I was expecting but uh…” Brendon paused for a bit to think about his options. “You know what, fuck it lets go. So uhhhh, how am I doing this”

“Ok, just uh, I don't know man just when you get in, calm her, maybe befriend her. I don't know just do what eve-ahhh- she's pretty strong not gonna lie.”

“Just stop talking. How do we do this. H-how are you gonna… eat... me.” Lincon did give a full answer to Brendon's question all he did was hold out one of his hands. Brendon assumed lincon was holding it out for Brendon for comfort or something. What he didn't expect was to go through what Mia experienced, the dizziness was the worst part, then there was the realization that he’d been shrunken. The only difference was that Brendon agreed to do this. 

“Huh, well this is, cool, yet terrifying.” 

“Let's just get this over with Brendon” Lincon was on the ground holding his stomach probably to try and restrict the poor girl's movements. Not that it was working too well at all, she was still able to throw a good punch or two.

“Oh right. So how-” Brendon wasn't able to finish his sentence as he was roughly grabbed by Lincon who quickly but carefully shoved Brendon into his mouth. Oh gosh, why did he have to taste so good too? First, the girl had to taste like buttercream frosting now his best friend tasted like strawberries.

‘I can see why she would be terrified if this is how it went down.’ Brendon thought, he loved his friend a lot but if this is how things happened to go down, it would be pretty terrifying if Brendon thought he was gonna die. It wasn't long before Lincon swallowed Brendon. He was squirming the whole way down, gosh that felt good. Lincon didn't want to think about the fact that he was swallowing his friend. He tried to make it as quick as possible. The trip down for Brendon was pretty quick, even though it felt a lot longer. When Brendon came to the entry of Lincoln's stomach he ended up landing on mia. 

“Shit, sorry.” mia didn't say anything. She just continued to move around and kick. “Uhm, let me introduce myself, hey, i'm Brendon. If you wouldn't mind just, stop kicking my friend. please.” Brendon tried to get comfortable and move around to get off of mia, but it seemed like Lincon was still trying to keep mia from kicking and freaking out. 

“First, Why does it matter that I know your name, we’re gonna die soon anyway. And second I'm not gonna stop kicking this bitch, he fuckin ate us. He's obviously not your friend if he ate you.”

“Right you still think you’re going to die. we-I-should probably fix that” Brendon said thinking out loud. 

“What are you talking about?

“Stop kicking and I'll tell you” 

“Fine, now please explain what you meant about you should fix the fact that I think I'm gonna die” 

Once Mia had stopped kicking there was a bit of extra room in Lincoln's gut. Brendon assumed it was because he removed his arm, or at least loosened his grip. 

“Ok, well basically, you're not going to die. You are perfectly safe”

Mia gave him a weird look. Not that he could see since it was pitch black. She stayed silent for a minute trying to understand what she had just been told. “Ok, so what you're telling me is that, we are in a stomach, you know the organ that digests things. And you say we are not going to be digested.” she paused, “what part of that makes sense to you” 

“He’s part wizard. Not quite sure how he does it but I mean it's safe according to him. And I trust him, I mean I have known him since I was like 3, so that helps I guess” 

“I kinda assumed he was magical in some way,” Mia said quite sarcastically 

After some chatting, Mia calmed down and Brendon was wanting to get out. But he promised Lincon he would try and keep the girl calm. So he decided to stay for a little while. Their conversation was interrupted by an abrupt motion. It was only for a second but they weren't expecting it. The movement turned into a gentle swaying they assumed Lincon started to walk. They didn't know where but it didn't matter to them. They were once again interrupted but this time by Lincon's voice.

“Now that you've calmed down. Let me know when you guys want out.” Lincon said, he sounded exhausted, it was a fair reaction to being pummelled from the inside. 

Brendon looked at Mia forgetting it was dark. Then he had an idea, he had forgotten that he had his phone on him. He decided to use that as a flashlight so they would be able to see each other. It takes a moment for them both to adjust to the light. Once they both could see without squinting they began to chat again. This time about when they wanted to get out. They both agreed they wanted to get out as soon as possible, though they also didn't care as they both wanted to hang out with each other for a little while longer. 

After a little more walking Lincon found a clearing and decided that this was a good spot to let his occupants out.

“Can you two stay still for a bit? I'm gonna let you out now”

Lincon had to focus his mind from whatever was outside to what was inside. He mumbled a few words then as if out of thin air mia appeared in his outstretched hand. He gave her an apologetic look as if that would make up for the fact that she was eaten without permission. Her response was to just roll her eyes at him. Lincon did feel guilty for scaring her so badly, he wanted to make it up to her but he didn't know how. How were you supposed to apologize for that? Buy a cake that says ‘sorry for eating you’? That seemed stupid. Lincon didn't really know where to put her so he decided to not put her anywhere. He had two hands, and had two residents, he closed his eyes figuring out where Brendon was. He felt him move for a second then he stilled again. Perfect. Lincon mumbled the same words a second time and had his other hand out, in a split second there was a faint glowy light and Brendon appeared on Lincon's hand. He figured he should probably bring them back to normal size now. He put them down on the ground being mindful that he should have some space between them and himself. After they were on the ground he sat down in front of them and started to speak what they thought was gibberish. Then they started to feel tingly and dizzy again but this time instead of getting smaller they got bigger and eventually grew back to normal size. 

Eventually they were all sitting in a triangle shape with no one saying a word. Brendon was the first to speak up, 

“Well, that was certainly an experience” in all honesty he just wanted to break the silence. 

“I didn't hate it..” it was true, she didn't hate it. She actually kind of enjoyed it once she understood that she would be fine. And once she got to know Brendon a bit. 

“Really?” Lincon was very shocked to hear that. Even Brendon looked slightly shocked. 

“I mean, yeah, I guess it wasn't the worst thing I've ever experienced” she said “well, after I knew that I wouldn't die.” she gave a slight glare to Lincon There was silence, but the silence was broken by Brendon cursing. Mia looked over confused and concerned. Lincon checked his watch and realized it was already 5 am. Which meant it was time for the sun to come out of hiding. Brendon stood up and apologized and said that he had to go. 

“Sorry about him, I can walk you home if you want, the sun is rising so you should probably get home” Lincon said as he made eye contact with Mia.  

“Yes please. I don't really know where I am right now” 

Lincon got up and held out his hand for Mia to grab onto. He pointed in the direction of where he found her and they started walking side by side. By the time they got to their destination Lincon realized he’d never gotten her name, 

“Hey, I don't think I ever caught your name?”

“Mia. My name’s Mia.”

“It was nice to meet you, Mia I hope we can meet again soon”

“How about tomorrow.”

“Let’s do it”

[ohprettyweeper-moved]

A Summer Story

Age 23

Pairing: Tyler x Kansas Word Count: 2540 (whoops) Warnings: Some drinking. Lots of fluff. Like, A LOT.  Challenge: Kansas’s YouAU Writing Challenge Tags: @takenvysleep​ @breadbinishigh​ @svintsandghosts​@xtina2191​

After my sixteenth birthday, Tyler and I did a lot better about staying in touch. We even managed a few visits over the years I was in college. The kiss and our camp crushes never came up, although I know I thought about addressing the matter more than a few times.

“What’s the point, though?” I would ask Red. “We were twelve and sixteen. It was forever ago.”

“But obviously not long enough to be forgotten,” Red would tease in return.

And that would end the conversation.

After I finished off my bachelor’s degree, I still had my master’s and my doctorate to go, but I was fortunate enough to have already found a job with a stormchasing team. I was low-man on the totem pole, but it would pay the bills while I worked through the rest of my education -- until I could start my own team.

The summer after college graduation, my friend Freddie invited me to Los Angeles for a visit. She had been a photography major, although she was talented enough to not need the extra education, honestly. She had been taking pictures for up-and-coming bands while she was up-and-coming, but landed a gig for the iHeartRadio music festival straight out of school. She invited me along, and I agreed -- mostly because I knew Tyler was going to be there. I made her promise not to tell anyone that I was going to be there, not by name, anyway. Tyler’s band was on the roster, and I wanted to surprise him.

“Or you could just tell him that you’re gonna be there,” Freddie suggested.

I smiled to myself. “Yeah, but I owe him a surprise like this.”

Freddie frowned, not really sure what I was talking about. I’d tell her later, but for now, I was too excited about my surprise to spill any details.

.&.

While Freddie and I got ready for the first night of the festival, I asked about the latest with her and her love interest.

“Tell me the truth,” I said, cocking one eyebrow, “did you only take this job because of Brendon?”

Freddie laughed, causing her mascara to smudge just above her eyelid. “Damn it. No, I didn’t not take this job because of Brendon. I didn’t have to. He and I -- well, we’re a thing.”

I squealed. “A thing? Okay, so like a serious thing, or what?”

Freddie nodded; she didn’t need makeup to put a blush across her cheeks. “Yes, a serious, committed, boyfriend-girlfriend thing.”

I waited, and when she didn’t say anything, I could have shook her. “Dude! Stop holding out. Tell me how it happened!”

Freddie put the mascara back into her makeup bag and hopped up on the bathroom counter. “Well, you know we’ve crossed paths at shoots in the city several times over the last few years. And my part of my last portfolio project, he let me use him as a subject for some shots. And right before graduation, I was out here visiting some photographer friends, and on a whim, I called him. We kept talking and now, we’re a thing.”

She ended her story with a shrug, hopped off the counter, and went back to finishing her makeup. She made it sound like being in a relationship with Brendon Urie had come naturally, almost.

“It did, kind of,” Freddie said, getting out her book of false lashes and selecting a pair. She squeezed out the appropriate amount of glue, let it get tacky, then went about the tedious process of applying the lash. “So, you gonna tell me about this Tyler kid, or what?”

I tilted my head from side to side. “Short version, we met at camp when I was twelve. I had a crush, so did he, but obviously nothing came of it. Then, when I was sixteen, Red had him come to our hometown for my birthday. Everything was really crap then, but Tyler -- he was my first kiss. And it turned things around. We’re really good friends, but we don’t get to see each other that often. This seemed like a good opportunity to surprise him, so … here I am.”

Freddie raised her brow. “Well, that’s adorable.”

“Stop, Freddie. It’s just one of those things. It’s nothing.”

“Mmhmm. Now who’s blushing?”

We both laughed then, and put away the conversation about boys to speed up the getting ready process -- although, I did warn her that regardless of Brendon Urie’s success in the musical world, he was still going to get the protective best friend speech when I met him.

.&.

“We’re Twenty One Pilots and so are you!”

That was the line he ended every show with, and I loved it. I loved the connection Tyler and Josh had with their fans, both from a general perspective, but also for Tyler and Josh’s sake. They had wondered several times over the years if the two of them alone were enough for the stage and a label -- turned out what I told him every time he voiced his concerns was right. They were more than enough.

Thanks to the pass Freddie and Brendon had scored for me, I was waiting for Tyler when he came offstage. Confetti was still falling over the outdoor crowd, and the cheering hadn’t even begun to die down. Josh spotted you first, at the end of the line of people waiting to high-five them or shake hands or whatever else after the show.

“Well, look who’s here,” Josh smiled, high-fiving me before stepping away so Tyler could get a good look at the surprise guest.

“Kansas!”

“Hey,” I laughed as he swept me up into his arms. Even though he was sweaty and in desperate need of a shower, I flung my arms around his neck and set my dry cheek against his sweaty one. “Had the opportunity to return the surprise and I couldn’t pass it up.”

Tyler hugged me tighter. “I’m so glad you’re here. C’mon, let’s go to the bus. I’ll get washed up and then I’ll take you out for food.”

“I never say no to food!”

Tyler laughed, slinging a sweaty arm across my shoulders. “Trust me, I know.”

.&.

“So, you two really met at a camp?” Freddie asked, somewhat incredulous. “You’ve known each other for ten years? I don’t know why I’m having such a hard time wrapping my mind around this.”

I looked at Tyler, who was already grinning over at me. “Yeah, well, after a few glasses of wine, I’d imagine it’s difficult to wrap your mind around pretty much anything.”

Freddie made a face at me, then leaned over to kiss Brendon. I looked down at my own drink, intentionally avoiding Tyler’s gaze. I’d only had one beer, but it was enough to keep me from thinking about anything but the kiss we had shared on my sixteenth birthday. There had, of course, been other kisses since then, but none of those kisses, and none of those guys, had quite the impact on me that Tyler and his kiss had.

Brendon stopped Freddie from ordering another glass of wine and instead asked for the tab. “I should probably get this one back to the hotel. Tab’s on me tonight. You guys want to share an Uber back?”

I managed to get past thinking about kissing Tyler long enough to look at him and shrug. “Up to you.”

Tyler considered the options for a few seconds. “Nah, you know what, we’re so close to the beach, and this one hardly ever gets out of the Midwest. We’ll walk down to the shore and go back in a little.”

“Suit yourself,” Brendon replied, handing the check and a few bills to the waiter. He lovingly pulled Freddie from her chair, made sure she had all of her belongings, then escorted her to the sidewalk.

Tyler rose from his chair, too, and extended a hand out to me. “Shall we, Kansas?”

“Let’s,” I replied, taking his hand and sharing the effort it took to get me to a standing position. “Lead the way.”

And he did. Tyler didn’t let go of my hand until we reached the sand. Even then, it was only long enough for both of us to slip out of our shoes, then his fingers were laced through mine again. The first few minutes of the walk were silent, save for the distant mumblings of the crowd and the waves as they came towards us before pulling back out to the sea.

Finally, I couldn’t take the silence any longer. “I’m really glad this ended up being a good surprise. I wasn’t sure if you’d be up to having an unexpected visitor.”

“Are you kidding me?” Tyler scoffed. “This is the best night, because you’re here. And tomorrow, we can go to Brendon’s show together. Honestly, I wish it was like this all the time. Having you around makes such a difference. I can’t even explain it. I’m good, you know, most of the time, when I’m on the road. But when you’re here -- it’s real.”

I gnawed on my bottom lip while I tried to come up with an appropriate response that didn’t give away how my heart was likely to beat out of my chest at any moment. How was this so effortless? Tyler was exactly right. Life was real and different, in a good way, when we were around each other. The furtive smiles and inside jokes and hand holding seemed to happen so naturally when we were with each other. There was never more kissing, never anything more than friendly cuddling. Still, there were moments, in person or otherwise, when I felt like we were only waiting on time to tell us that it was time for us to happen.

“Hey, checkout the moon,” Tyler said, squeezing my hand to get my attention. He pointed out at that big, glowing orb that seemed to hand in the sky like a Christmas ornament on a pine tree.

We stopped there in the sand, with my back against Tyler’s front, and his arms hugging around my shoulders. I tucked my hands between his forearms and tilted my head to one side.

“It’s so pretty. I mean, it’ll never beat seeing the moon through dissipating thunder clouds, or seeing the moon shine over the prairie, but I’ll take it.”

Tyler laughed and kissed my cheek. “My Kansas girl.”

A quiet giggle escaped my throat as I returned the gesture and kissed his cheek. I turned away, but Tyler hooked a finger under my chin, guiding my mouth close to his.

“Tonight feels like another special night,” Tyler commented. His voice was magically soft and rough at the same time. “Or is that wishful thinking?”

I swallowed hard, once again not sure what to reply. I wanted him to kiss me; I wanted it bad. I couldn’t find the words to tell him that, though. Instead, I nodded as much as I could force my muscles to do in that moment. One end of Tyler’s mouth turned up, and his thumb grazed over my lips before the touch was replaced by his mouth on mine.

The kiss was everything I remembered, but still somehow brand new. I lingered in the moment, wishing it would never end, but knowing that it had to at some point. Maybe the time had come, and things would be different, but in a perfect sort of way.

Tyler’s arms were still wrapped around my shoulders, but I turned to face him, and my arms rested perfectly over his hips. I could feel his fingers playing with the ends of my hair. I don’t think I had felt that content since I was sixteen.

The kiss ended too soon, and too suddenly. Instead of resting comfortably around my shoulders, Tyler’s hands held me at arm’s length. The look on his face read something akin to confusion, and maybe fear.

“Kansas, listen.”

I hung my head and stepped back. “Not really the words I wanna hear after a kiss like that, Ty.”

He licked his lips. “I know. It’s -- see, the thing is, there’s this girl in Nashville that I’ve been seeing. It’s not serious, and she’s not you, but I -- it’s enough that I shouldn’t be kissing you.”

“Oh. I see.” I wiped the last of his taste off my lips and took a step back. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know. I wouldn’t ever want to ruin something that made you happy.”

Tyler took my hand and pulled me a little closer, but not touching. “That’s the thing, you know? You make me happy, and I want to be kissing you. But I don’t want to hurt her, either. I think I need some time to figure things out. I hate saying that, I hate saying it to you. But I think we both need to know for sure if we want each other, or if this is nostalgia. You know?”

I didn’t want to agree with him, but he was right. So, I nodded. “Yeah, I know what you mean.”

Tyler let out a breath of relief, then cupped my face in his hands. He looked me directly in the eyes and said the thing I needed to hear most. “This was not a mistake, and I’m not going to regret it tomorrow, okay?”

I couldn’t help but give a sad smile. “Okay. Thank you.”

Still holding my face, he placed a quick, chaste kiss on my lips. “Let’s go back to the hotel.”

“Okay.”

On the ride back to the hotel, Freddie texted to tell me that Brendon was going to crash with her, since he had been booked a room with his manager, thanks to all of the festival bookings. She asked if I would mind staying with Tyler, and I texted back that was fine.

“I can sleep on the floor or something.”

Tyler’s head fell back. “This is going to be awkward now, isn’t it? I ruined everything.”

I laughed at him and patted him on the back, unable to stop myself. “You didn’t ruin everything, stop being so dramatic. I don’t want to make things awkward for you or get you into hot water with this girl.”

Tyler shrugged. “I’m sure it’s fine. You can bunk with me.”

So, it was decided. I got my bag from the hotel room I had intended on staying in with Freddie, and returned to Tyler’s room. He was ready for bed, which gave me the bathroom to do my nighttime routine. Once I was ready to knock out, too, I settled on the free side of the bed against the pillows.

“You can leave the TV on,” I offered, “I prefer to fall asleep to the sound anyway.”

Tyler positioned himself next to me, an arm around my shoulder again. I settled with my head against his shoulder and chest, and one arm draped over his abdomen. I was tired, but Tyler was sure he’d be up for a while.

“If the noise starts to bother you, let me know.”

“I will,” I promised through a yawn. “Night, Tyler.”

“Night, Kansas.”

The last thing I remembered before drifting off to sleep, was Tyler’s warm lips against my forehead.

[taylorswiftstylequestions]

You probably have so many asks like this, but thoughts? It reminds me of SIO, but I’m actually getting into it. I think the key is to not take it so seriously and realize this song doesn’t represent the entire album (as it often is with T and lead singles). Just have fun when you listen to it and don’t try to dissect the lyrics.

i know you’re probably collecting all of our questions about your thoughts on the song in one post like you usually do but… thoughts about the song? i LOVE the aesthetic, it’s my favorite look since RED and i do like brendon a lot but i’m kind of disappointed the lead single is a feature? i’m not a fan of features in general i guess. the song itself is meh to me, i don’t dislike that most of her lead singles in the past but i also don’t love it. but she looks AMAZING

any thoughts on the song itself? it felt like it was very much on the same note as shake it off in how playful and repetitive / feel good it is. it’s already stuck in my head.

I know it usually takes you some time to formulate your opinions on lead singles (and you’ve probably gotten 1000+ asks like this already, hah, so answer when you’re ready) but: opinions on ‘ME!’ so far?

I assume you’re withholding asks about your opinion on the single bc otherwise how has nobody asked you yet??? Dying to know your thoughts

So Sarah! I know you’re probably INSANELY swamped right now, but when you get a chance, I’d love to know your thoughts on the ME! song and video! I was initially quite meh about it (loved the video visuals, thought the song was solidly mediocre), but I literally haven’t been able to stop playing it since, so that’s obviously false. Curious to hear your opinion!

honest thoughts on the song…

---

Oy. So I’ve had this post weighing heavy on my head since last week and of course it’s been your guys’ most asked question of me. 

What I’ve been considering is how to weigh being truthful, critical, and honest, but also kind. TSS is not about being unnecessarily cruel. But it is a place to voice considered opinions openly. 

I could make this post long, but I’ll do my best to keep it short. 

... Or at least medium length. 

The song is catchy and it is joyous. But it is also, in my opinion, Taylor’s weakest lead single she’s ever released.

If her goal was for people to not take the song seriously, I feel she accomplished her mission handily. But an unintended consequence is also that people may not take her or her remaining album material seriously by extension. 

I have always held the hope (TS70s Predictions here) that TS7 would be about Taylor returning to her roots. I’ve been adamant and had my fingers crossed, breathlessly waiting for her to make all of her material as meaningful to the general public as we, internally, as fans know it to be. That in her quick approach to 30 that now would be that time. 

I’ve repeated many times and have the sane-keeping knowledge that “WANEGBT” and “All Too Well” somehow co-exist on the same album as well as Taylor’s own words about the emotional breadth of TS7 keeping me from the precipice. I have faith that “ME!” is not an indicator of the entirety of the album and I’m still very much looking forward to what more this era brings. I believe that “ME!” is a single Taylor wanted to put out first and foremost as a joyous celebration of where she has been. And she is at her most shaking things off. More than she has ever been. 

While I’m a little confused still by her making a lead album single a duet, I do have to say that Brendon and her are completely adorable. I think he’s cute, I love their chemistry together, and I hope his friendship to her is sincere and they remain in each other’s good graces. He genuinely seems like a wonderful human. 

With that ... I listened to “ME!” first. Like actually listened. Without video. And then I watched the video. While I’m glad I did so I could focus solely on the audio, I steadfastly feel that lyrically and musically this is not Taylor’s best single. Happy music does not inherently mean that good lyrics need to be sacrificed. Especially when that song is being written by Taylor Swift. I don’t have anything against happy music. But I do have a hard time attaching myself to music that feels like weightless, airless fluff. And yes it is because I hold Taylor to a higher and unfair standard than i do other artists. She is my ride or die. My most gifted child. And I know she’s capable of more and better and that she will more than likely be delivering that with the remaining 10+ tracks on TS7. But “ME!” is not it.

And I can’t even talk about that bridge. 

[writersshock-deactivated]

Nobody ever sends these asks so imma do ‘em all.

lets get personal.

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?

Um, right now? I really don’t know... Probably Panic! at the Disco’s new Pray for the Wicked album. Eh,,, Dancing’s Not A Crime, Say Amen, High Hopes, Old Fashioned, and then a couple older one’s, maybe Don’t Threaten Me With A Good Time and Miss Jackson.

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

Jeremy. My crush from summer camp. Just to see him again instead of having to wait 10 months (that is if I can afford it when the time comes -- otherwise I may never see him again). So not exactly ‘meeting’, but.... Celebrity-wise, I don’t know. Perhaps Kamala Harris, a California politician.

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

“DNA is often too small to obtain reliable results.” (my forensic textbook)

4: What do you think about most?

I dunno... stuff.

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?

[sleepy face emoji]

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

Usually underwear... it really depends whether or not I’m wearing a shirt.

7: What’s your strangest talent?

I don’t know... I can rap, which isn’t strange per say but it’s weird to me.

8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)

Girls are freaking amazing; Boys are freaking amazing too.

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?

Yes, 2. The negative anon and the positive anon.

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?

Last night, with my 1 year old sister, to Nirvana.

11: Do you have any strange phobias?

I’m afraid of fire. Like, touching fire or using an oven or working with boiling water.

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

No, I have never stuck a foreign object up my nose.

13: What’s your religion?

Atheist, but I have a lot of opinions about philosophy and faith.

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

Going inside. Or ‘playing’ with my brother.

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

Behind! I love photography! Not photogenic at all though.

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

Well my favorite band song of all time is Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana, but they’re not my favorite band. I’d have to say Twenty One Pilots or Panic! at the Disco.

17: What was the last lie you told?

‘No, I have never stuck a foreign object up my nose.’

18: Do you believe in karma?

Not as a Universal phenomena. But yeah, what goes around comes around.

19: What does your URL mean?

Um, ‘writersblock’ was taken. Shocking, right? My main, ‘almondivory’ is more interesting. It’s for my best friend Amber and me, Ian. And her shade of foundation is almond. And mine is ivory. So it all worked out.

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

Greatest weakaness is probably laziness. Greatest strength? Passion.

21: Who is your celebrity crush?

Olivia Wilde, Jennifer Lawrence, Rihanna, Beyonce, Kristen Stewart, Penelope Cruz, and Michelle Pfeiffer are all contenders. Yeah, Tyler Joseph and Brendon Urie too.

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

Not since I was little.

23: How do you vent your anger?

Sulk. Listen to soft emo music.

24: Do you have a collection of anything?

Mental disorders.

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

Online.

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

Not yet.

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

I HATE nails on a chalkboard.

28: What’s your biggest “what if”?

‘What if I was rich’? Or ‘what if i was hot’? Or, perhaps, ‘what if i was straight?’

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

No. And I think there’s a possibility of some form of life from elsewhere in the universe, but not mainstream aliens.

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

Saydon. My neighbor in class. He’s looking at me strangely now. On the left, a cheap “wall” (room divisor).

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?

Not much. A hint of coffee.

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

I don’t know... most recently, my brother’s bathroom. It’s supposed to be ‘ours’ but I can’t stand it.

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

EAST COAST

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

Well, my biological sex is female, even though I am nonbinary. So I’ll go with a male singer (also because there are too many hot girls to choose from) ... Shawn Mendes. Or Tyler Joseph or Brendon Urie.

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

This is to complicated. It’s not that I don’t have opinions (i have many) but when i talk about this I talk for almost 2 hours and 40 minutes. Yes, I’ve been timed.

36: Define Art.

Creative expression.

37: Do you believe in luck?

Not really? I’m unsure what this means exactly.

38: What’s the weather like right now?

I’m in class, but when I got here it was clear and a little damp.

39: What time is it?

10:41am Tuesday October 30th

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

No. Too young (14). But yes. I was in a bad car crash summer 2017.

41: What was the last book you read?

Textbook: for my forensic anthropology class. Otherwise: Summer Reading by Hilma Wolitzer

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?

Yes!

43: Do you have any nicknames?

By birth name is Fiona. Only one person in the world is allowed to call me Fifi. Otherwise, Ian, Ean, E.K, and E.L. (@scholarlypidgeot)

44: What was the last film you saw?

Not sure if it was Ocean’s 8 or Dangerous Minds.

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

Physical? Not sure.

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?

Yeah, probably, but not for long. I raised caterpillars into butterflies onse.

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?

No, I said, like a liar.

48: What’s your sexual orientation?

Demi-ace.

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?

Yes. So many.

50: Do you believe in magic?

Not in the way you’re asking.

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

No, unfortunately. I forgive too easily and I keep going back to the same abusive friendship.

52: What is your astrological sign?

Virgo, I believe. Sept. 16.

53: Do you save money or spend it?

If it’s my own, save up. Somebody’s else? Spend.

54: What’s the last thing you purchased?

2 coffees and a brownie. I’m healthy.

55: Love or lust?

Love.

56: In a relationship?

No.

57: How many relationships have you had?

1 (but liked 3 people).

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

Yes.

59: Where were you yesterday?

Home.

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

Yes. A couple of the flowers on my bag are pinkish-purple. My Ziploc bags have blue and pink strips. My jacket is galaxy-patterned and has a little pink in it. Otherwise, no.

61: Are you wearing socks right now?

Yes. Black with white stars, constellations, and cresecent moons. Mid-calf. Warm.

62: What’s your favourite animal?

Dolphin, elephant, owl, cat, or dog.

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

I ... don’t have one.

64: Where is your best friend?

About an hour away. She moved at the beginning of the month (had lived literally right across the road, like we could whisper to each other from each other’s yards.

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

@thethew​ @gottaenjoythelittlethingzz​ @blacktwittercomedy​ @badjokesbyjeff​ @writersupportgroup​

66: What is your heritage?

English, Scottish, Polish, German. I am a white boi/girl.

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?

Sleeping, oddly.

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?

Never thought about it.

69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?

It ... depends on your definition? Think it’s pretty safe to say no.

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

No.

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

Save the fucking dog!

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

a) Yes.

b) I honestly have no idea. Probably contact all my friends from summer camp and tell them how much I love them and the camp. And find Jeremy, my summer camp crush, and tell him that I liked him.

c) Yes.

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

Why?! I’d have to say trust. To not be trusted would drive me insane. And not being able to trust anyone would be awful. But love... I mean, I’d be terribly sad without it. :(

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

Donald MacGillavry by Silly Wizard.

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

8672 (home)

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

Trust, support, communication, and understanding.

77: How can I win your heart?

Stab me and remove it in a battle. Other than that? Love me.... <3

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?

YES

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

No idea at all.

80: What size shoes do you wear?

8 or 9 Women’s (US)

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

“Age 117 years, 4 months, and 23 days -- she was happy.”

82: What is your favourite word?

Absolutely no idea. Maybe ‘l’eau’?

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

Red

84: What is a saying you say a lot?

“?”

85: What’s the last song you listened to?

Homemade Dynamite- REMIX

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?

Bright yellow - Indigo is where they all are.

87: What is your current desktop picture?

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

I thought about this for a while. Nobody. Because everybody I hate, I’d want them to finally understand why I hate them rather than just exploding. They shouldn’t get to go that easy.

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

What’s the worst lie you ever told?

90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

Scream, throw my pillows at them, knock them all over, lock them in my bedroom, and sleep somewhere else.

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

Well it was okra. Absolutely. No idea what power that gives me? The power to cook delicious food with little effort would be cool.

92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

Dancing with Annie in 2015.

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

This thing ... I ... watched. On the internet.

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

Not into sex. I’m gonna interpret this as ‘making out with’. Hmm... maybe Halsey? Or Brendon Urie (assuming I was instantly a lot older). <3

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

Scotland.

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?

Not yet. My brother’s been close several times. Best friend’s cousin is in jail and her dad almost was (cousin for drug offenses and sexually harassing us, dad for verbally and physically abusing her).

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?

Yes. I remember twice right now. Once when I was 7 or 8 in San Francisco. Once when I was 10 or 11 after eating really greasy Chinese food.

98: Ever been on a plane?

Yes. Maybe about 10-15 times?

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

“YEET”.

No, seriously, probably, “Right now everybody in the world knows who I am. And that terrifies me. Also, I’m in a library so I have to be quiet. Climate change is real.”

[rugeon]

Learning to butterfly the videogame chicken breast

New year new potential projects. For final year project 2018-2019. Might as well start with the new ‘ideation document.

Ideation Document

Contexts:

Systemic gameplay - systemic narrative, and otherwise

Gamefeel/ Player Satisfaction/ Juicing

Strong unusual sense of place and people

Unique methods of interactive media storytelling (NITW Text boxes)

Coziness in games

Non traditional methods of mechanical interaction ie. traditional control methods, with more unique player expression

Having an Interesting failure spectrum (Tom Francis thoughts on why MGSV is a fun stealth game, due to its wide array of failure states)

Analogue/varied means of  expression within one mechanic or activity (jumping in mario, building a snowman in NITW prologue game, Lost Constellation)

Ethos of messy fast prototyping iterartion and production (inspired by Jenny Jiao Hsia talk about prototyping)

Affecting audio  

Techniques 

Interaction Design

Branching Narratives + Dialogue

Games AI

Procedural Generation

Advanced Audio and Visual Processing

Inspiring Works 

Heat Signature - Suspicious Developments, Tom Francis

Roguelike, top down action/ stealth/ heist game where you play as different intergalactic heist/bounty hunter people that breaks into spaceships. Extremely systemic game that encourages players to find interesting solutions to problems by providing a wide variety of interesting sci-fi tools to the player. Systemic gameplay+ systemic player narratives as told through gameplay plans  being made and then changing/going awry as well as conditions constraining players to be creative.

Hotline Miami - Dennaton Games, Jonatan Söderström. Dennis Wedin

Surreal, hyperviolent top down action game about the trancelike sprees that a masked killer enacts, that strongly highlights the violent obsession of videogames and culture. Has several factors that contribute to a sense of good gamefeel, and making what should be a frustrating experience instead induce a flow state.

Sid Meier's Covert Action - MPS Labs, MicroProse

Interesting systemic narrative that the player experiencing by foiling and interacting with various agents and stages of a spy plot. Systemic narrative that is expressed by the gameplay systems. Feeling of the ai acting irrespective to the player. Narrative experience of player feels quite systemic.

Night in the Woods (NITW) - Infinite Fall, Scott Benson, Alec Holowka, Bethany Hockenberry + Finji Adam Saltsman, Rebekah Saltsman, Em Halberstadt

Anthropomorphic animal narrative, platforming, adventrue game that tells the story of a 20 year old that comes back to her home town and and friends after leaving college. Tells an emotive story unconventional by games standards in a very playful way that has some traditional gameplay elements (platforming) but also makes interactive more unusual verbs (a pizza eating section, and pretzel stealing microgame). Creates an extremely strong, cozy sense of place. Expressive within the limits of its digital medium+storytelling (wide variety of personality conveyed through text box animation).

Minit - Vlambeer, Jan Willem Nijman, Kitty Calis, Jukio Kallio, Dominik Johann

Small, short adventure game where you die and every minute and respawn at the same space, learning about the world, optimising your route and changing the world slightly with each successive run. Very polished game with superb gamefeel (all vlambeer games have great gamefeel+juice)

Kentucky Route Zero - Cardboard Computer- Jake Elliott, Tamas Kemenczy, Ben Babbitt

The great american novel in game form. A magical realist story about debt to the past. Extremely important and affective narrative game. ‘The Entertainment’ - Interlude, elucidates relationship and interplay between player and developers that creates the game experience. Creates a powerful atmosphere + utilises branching narrative

I also wrote down a bunch of other stuff I’ve been thinking about in a big jumbled list for help during ideation process. This is just junk floating around, mood board of my head.

Yakuza, Moby Dick, Dark Souls/Absolver, Atom Zombie Smasher+Brendon Chung, Papers Please+Return of Obra Dinn, FTL+Into The Breach, Hylics, High Hell, devolver, Hyper Light Drifter, Flinthook, Jalopy, Jet-Set Radio, Mark of the Ninja, MGS V, Luftrausers, Shadow of Mordor, The Norwood Suite, Small radios, big televisions, The Endless Express, Alan Wake+remedy games, Assassins Creed 1, Banner Saga, F.E.A.R. ,  Helldivers, invisible inc. , Monaco, Westerado,  spectacle fighters dmc, thomas was alone, reigns, evil dead, sorcerer, valhalla rising, a field in england, hard to be a god, stalker, man with a movie camera, bomb city, taking of pelham 123, assault on precinct 13,  escape from new york, fruitvale station, playtime, drive, thief, collateral, taxi driver, lost in translation, tekkonkinkreet, ki-ki delivery service+ghibli, REDLINE, cagliostro, 2049, che, motorcycle diaries, man with movie camera, koyaanisqatsi,VVitch,Sacco e Vanzeti, nocturnal animal, die hard, ghost in the shell, atlanta, twin peaks, fear and loathing,only god forgives,donnie darko, mad max, satoshi kon films, eyes wide shut, dog day afternoon, seventh seal, whiplash, brazil, t2 trainspotting, hellboy comic, fargo, rocky horror, gozu, juno, clerks, slacker, daria, almost famous, lady bird, frances ha, fury, wes anderson colour+ framing, NOIR + lighting, there will be blood, no country for old men, unforgiven, dollars trilogy, run lola run, phone booth, die hard, dr strangelove, apocalypse now/heart of darkness, the wire, adult swim+space ghost stuff, home movies+squigglevision, hannibal, bojack, flcl, true detective, desert punk, QOTSA, them crooked vultures, grunge, idles, talking heads, wu, green kingdom, lizard gizzard, acoustic wizard, tobacco, diiv, mbv, spooky+ over the garden wall, bowie, clash

Initial Ideas

A game where you play as a witch exploring a modern magical realist city at night. Should have an interesting traversal mechanic. All about traversal, dancing and screaming in a city at night, strong sense of place + atmosphere: inspired by films such as playtime, thief, drive, collateral, fruitvale station, lost in translation as well as games like NITW. Thought about more in this doc: one pager section on 2nd page: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1O3NC8HqwmERq57Dcqqc2d2Ih34ZVO4-vEQPnVTKRyOk/edit?usp=sharing

Some kind of game themed around the desert/stoner rock music genre which includes acts like Red Fang, Kyuss and Sleep. Make use of AAVP to have a dynamic soundtrack responding to gameplay that impacts the visuals. The game’s mechanics should be directly inspired by the theming, and common features of the genre, could be action oriented, with rhythm game influences. One game that would probably be worth looking at in relation to this is the recently released Tetris Effect, while I would not be as interested in a game as abstracted as tetris, how they achieve a flow state, and have music and visuals informed by gameplay would be worth looking in to. I feel this game is more likely to involve rapid prototyping.

Create a languid game about chilling out on a ship with crew and passengers. Setting could be sci-fi or more historic - chatting on computer to far flung galactic friends and doing menial space jobs/ tasks aboard ship. The setting and experience of the place can draw from ideas about coziness in games + make use of Branching Narrative/Dialogue. Potentially also think about how procedural narrative could be a factor. Inspired by Moby Dick, NITW and Purgatory

Hotline Miami/Goap/Diehard - ‘Create a systemic top-down stealth action game where the player is asked to foil a developing plot/heist by a group of AI agents whose plan and activities respond to the players attempts to derail it. The focus should be on the player feeling like they are responding to the AI’s adaptations to the player interrupting their plot. Each level would be one plot/ situation the player is thrust into. The project is inspired by the evolving plots of covert action, the setting/circumstances of Die-Hard and the gameplay/perspective of hotline miami. This project will involve development of a complex AI system that could be implemented via a GOAP method.

Walkie talky/radio gameplay mechanic to solicit/disseminate information

Research into the effectiveness of procedural vs authored content in games, as large games increasingly find themselves trying to use procedural generation to meet the demands of growing content demand they are finding it difficult to reconcile this with a desire to create quality, curated content, narrative or otherwise. I propose research into the various ways procedural vs authored content has been divvied up in games, the amount of people working in each area, how much curated work is required for procedural work to be effective and the reception/perception of these two methods to create content for games. The means by which this could be investigated is perhaps by creating some data sets of very simple different possible mechanical games in Unity or more narrative ones in twine, that are sorted into different groups of procedural / authored games. We would then measure the level of player engagement over the course of their time with the games and within the context of how long it took to make the given games. Context + techniques: procedural generation + branching narratives

[mishadventuresofcastiel-blog]

Saturday Night °•sheith fluff•°

Keith groaned, running his fingers through his ebony hair. Stupid college. Stupid two thousand word essays. Stupid everything. All he wanted to do was sleep, maybe reread " Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban" again, but his essay on Egyptian artifacts and how they affected civilization got in the way of that. Again. Why the twenty year old decided to go for his masters degree in archeology again? Oh right, because he was a history buff nerd. In his opinion, he should be out in the field not writing essays. Then again, more often than not he would be writing reports instead of scouring deserts for old pottery. He huffed, leaning over his laptop again. The tap-tap noise of the keys was the only sound echoing through the otherwise empty apartment. Keith's boyfriend, police chief Takashi Shirogane, was still at work, and their reverse tortoise shell cat was somewhere sleeping. Keith indulged in the silence. Silence was something he'd grown up with, out in the middle of nowhere Texas, but ever since he moved up to Houston with Shiro he'd had nothing of it. Keith missed his little shack home, in all honesty. The city bustle, the rush and the chaos just wasn't his style. Keith was more of a quiet outdoorsy, "let's look at the stars until we pass out" kind of a guy, but if Shiro liked the city Keith would tolerate it. Luckily for Keith, Shiro chose an apartment on a higher floor of their ten story apartment, so he didn't have to hear the cars driving by constantly. After finishing another three paragraphs, Keith finally gave up and stuffed his hands in the pockets of his red hoodie. He glanced at the time in the bottom right corner of his laptop screen, and sighed loudly. How was it only 5:30 PM? Keith had started on this essay at 4, and he swore he was working on it for at least three hours. Oh well,time crawls when you're bored and about to flip a desk. Keith huffed and stood up, trudging his way into the kitchen to make a coffee. The Bluetooth speaker sat on the counter, taunting Keith. Shiro had placed him on a strict speaker ban since a week ago, when Keith had decided it was a good idea to blare Fall Out Boy until his ears bled. Needless to say, he almost got them kicked out of the apartment. In his defense, Keith did that all the time, so they neighbors should've been used to it. As he made his Donut Shop coffee in the Keurig, Keith stared at the speaker, debating if he wanted to die tonight. Not literally of course. Keith meant if he blared the new Panic! song until Shiro got home and Shiro got mad. But...would Brendon Urie's glorious high notes be worth the lecture? Yes, yes it would. So, Keith pulled his phone out of his pocket, turned on the little black speaker, and scrolled through his music downloads until he found "Say Amen (Saturday Night)". The first few notes echoed off the silent white walls, and Keith's mood immediately went from "flip a desk" to "yes". Screw Shiro, screw his rules. Brendon Urie was worth more. "Oh, it's Saturday night!" Keith shouted along with Brendon, his coffee sitting forgotten next to the coffeemaker. "I pray for the wicked on the weekend," Keith started dancing around the kitchen, dopamine replacing the melatonin his tired college brain produced. "Momma can I get another amen!" His cat, lovingly named Josh, jumped on the counter and stared at the dancing teen curiously. Keith...didn't care. He was too busy spinning and singing, his laughter almost drowning out the music. He knew what that meant. Keith grabbed his phone and turned the volume all the way up, knowing full well Shiro was going to murder him when he got home. Oh well. His husband Brendon was worth the punishment. "Oooh! Oh, it's Saturday night!" "Swear to God I ain't ever gonna repent, Momma can I get another amen!" He nearly slipped, being he was dancing in socks on tile, but whatever. He'd done this before, he wasn't going to slip. Keith continued dancing and singing, grabbing a spoon to use like a microphone. Screw being a normal quiet neighbor. The people on this floor needed to hear the gospel that was Panic! At the Disco. "Oh, it's Saturday night yeah!" Keith continued this, his cat hissing at one point because Keith almost stepped on it, uncaring that his neighbors were probably groaning in frustration. They could deal with it. At least he wasn't blasting MCR at midnight, which he had done before and said he did without shame. So what, Keith liked alternative rock. So what, his favorite shirt said "I'll stop wearing black when they make a darker color". Did it matter? No, no it did not. Maybe he just enjoyed being different and apathetic. Oh god, was Shiro going to murder him when he got home from work. Oh well! Keith tried his best to match Brendon's notes, even the high ones. Shockingly, he actually did fairly well! The hardest part was at the 2 minute 44 second mark, where Brendon went full on opera soprano. "Its's Saturday!!!!" Keith. Matched. The. Note. The song ended, and silence filled the house again. Keith's lungs hurt, he was breathless, and his cheeks ached from smiling so much. He hadn't exercised that much in a while, and he loved the feeling of his chest burning. It meant he did an amazing job, and he smirked. Walking back over to his coffee and taking a sip, Keith brushed ebony hair out of his dusky eyes. "Nice high notes, Emo McGee." Keith spit his coffee all over himself, jumping and turning toward the direction the voice had come from. Steel grey eyes and 200 pounds of pure hotness greeted him, and Keith flushed in embarrassment. How long had Shiro been there? Oh my God, Keith was dying. Had Shiro saw the whole thing? For some reason, Keith was more embarrassed than the time Lance pointed out his fly was open very, very loudly during a lecture. That time Keith had punched Lance in the arm, swearing like a sailor. This time Keith couldn't resort to assault, as much as he wanted to, so he settled for twirling a fork between his fingers as threateningly as he could. "Shut up. When did you get home?" Shiro chuckled. "Early enough to see you dancing with a spoon." "Again. Shut. Up," Keith shot back, his cheeks flushing further. Argh. Shiro knew him too well, knew exactly what buttons to push. Keith wondered why he dated that man. "Nope.  I refuse, Mr. Soprano-Eyeliner. Did you enjoy singing along to Brendon 'my forehead is the size of the ocean' Urie?" Keith launched the fork at Shiro, and it's target narrowly dodged. The fork lodged itself in the wall, and Keith smirked at his work. All those knife throwing classes came in handy. Nobody disrespected the god that was Brendon Urie in his house. Not unless they had a death wish. Clearly, Shiro did. Speaking of, Shiro gasped and slapped his chest mockingly. "Keith! I am offended! That's abuse!" "Shut up, you jerk," Keith replied gruffly, smiling beside himself. God, he couldn't hold a grudge. That was one of his many flaws, the inability to stay angry at Shiro. Shiro smiled softly, a few white strands of hair falling in his steel gray eyes. "Love you, My Chemical Panic at Romance." "Shut up." "I believe the words you're looking for are 'I love you too'." Keith shook his head. "Nope, pretty sure I said what I meant." Shiro huffed, standing and wrapping his muscular arms around the emo's waist. Keith rested his head on his boyfriends chest, breathing in the scent of Irish Springs and coffee, with the slight metallic scent of gunpowder. If only Keith wasn't upset about being teased. Maybe he'd enjoy this more. "No, I'm fairly sure you didn't." "Fine," Keith gently punched Shiro's chest, careful to avoid the shiny metal badge on the blue collared shirt. "I love you too." "Even though I tease you about blaring a song about Saturday night on a Saturday night?" Oh, right. Keith had forgotten about that. Today was a Saturday. Why didn't he notice when Shiro came home before seven? The only time he came home before seven was on the weekend night shifts. "Even though you tease me about blaring a song about Saturday night on a Saturday." "Jerk." "Bitch."

[xtruss]

Which Players Have Been The Biggest Losses to Cricket This Century?

Mohammad Asif, patron saint of what-could-have-beens Getty Images (A Boak Bollock who involved himself in a match fixing crimes and killed his own promising career. Otherwise he would be the most fiercest, formidable, intimidating and dangerous fast bowler of the Cricketing World.)

— Jul 9, 2020 | ESPN Staff

In this edition of Rabbit Holes, Osman Samiuddin, Andrew Fidel Fernando and Sidharth Monga gather for a round of lamentation and breast-beating over cricket's greatest unfulfilled talents and shed tears over what might have been.

Andrew Fidel Fernando, ESPNcricinfo's Sri Lanka correspondent: So, the biggest losses to cricket this century. I think given the people involved in the conversation, this will quickly degenerate into a Mohammad Asif support group. But there are so many others who've not had the careers we all wanted them to have.

Osman Samiuddin, senior editor: Wait, what? This is not the Asif Anonymous Group already?

Fernando: "Hi, I'm Osman, and it's been ten years since I last watched Asif bowl. (breaks down sobbing uncontrollably)"

Sidharth Monga, assistant editor: And the thing is, Asif don't care. Or at least doesn't seem to care.

Samiuddin: Although the thing is, I think Asif does care. In that interview with Umar Farooq it was clear he cares about how people remember him. Maybe just not enough to get bogged down by it.

Monga: He has moved on better than us. Which is him being kinda, "Yeah, this is life, what are you going to do about it?" But I also like that he is turning out in domestic cricket despite there being no hope that he will ever bowl at the highest level again. This is every ball of his first two spells of the QeA final in 2017-18. Cruelly, captained again by Salman Butt, who chose to field first, which is something you don't do in Test cricket these days. And the first two comments on the video!

Samiuddin: For the longest time - and even now - I believe that the careers of Kumar Sangakkara and AB de Villiers would have turned out different had they had to play Asif often.

Fernando: Sanga would have got out cheaply to Asif five times in a row one series and retired in shame in 2012 - that's how your fantasy goes, right?

Samiuddin: Earlier, ideally.

Monga: Hashim Amla, AB and Kevin Pietersen didn't even play him that much, but the little that they did was enough to convince them he was the best bowler they faced. Ahead of all the other legends of the time.

Samiuddin: But with the advances in batsmanship - though, I guess mostly in white-ball cricket - how would Asif have responded? It's not a bad time to be a Test bowler though, so he probably would have been okay still.

Remember when Asif took 6 for 41 in Sydney in 2010, in a losing cause? Getty Images

Fernando: I do think Asif would have loved some of the tracks Pakistan have played on in the last five, six years.

Samiuddin: The UAE? I mean, imagine Misbah captaining Asif - would he have turned him into an offspinner?

Fernando: Hah, true, but I meant more outside the UAE. Those New Zealand greentops where you can only see the batsman from the helmet up, because of the grass cover. He would also have adored a lot of the tracks Pakistan played on in Sri Lanka, in the middle of the last decade, when they were visiting every other weekend.

Samiuddin: Also can't help but think how he would have gone in Australia. He had one great Test there - in Sydney - but that surface was green that first morning and it had rained and clouds were around, so it was ideal. I think that's probably the last time Australia had anything other than a flat track. His set-ups were like Warne in conception - this one of Clarke especially. He bowled four-five balls to Clarke before this, all good length, on off-stump line, either not seaming or seaming away. Two-three he left alone to keeper. One he drove. This one he tried to drive again and it was the first one that seamed in. So, so, so simple.

Monga: Did you say set-ups? And he did it all without a perfect upright seam the way Mohammed Shami's is. Or maybe bolt upright is not perfect, who knows. Also, Marcus North getting out in three balls reminds me of Asif once saying he is sometimes disappointed with batsmen who don't let him set them up properly and get out before the payoff.

Samiuddin: There was also a great set-up of Shane Watson in a previous Test, where Asif bowled to an 8-1 off-side field for a couple of overs and well wide of off stump. Like, really wide outside. Almost unnoticed he was pulling Watson further and further out to the off side. And then suddenly, when literally nobody was expecting it, he bowled one a little straighter, quicker, it swung in a fair bit. Watson had moved out to off stump in anticipation and the ball ended up missing Watson's leg stump by millimetres. I don't think I would ever have seen a dismissal like that. All that work for one ball and it only narrowly didn't come off.

Fernando: I feel like we could be on Asif all day.

Samiuddin: The point of all of which is that I don't think I have regretted not seeing more of any cricketer than Asif. So that's decided. How about some others?

Though, I mean, Pakistan could put out three XIs of these players who were lost and they could play a pointless tri-series among themselves. Like Mohammad Zahid. Fastest four balls Brian Lara faced in his life.

Monga: Would Umar Akmal qualify?

Fernando: And if we're doing a long Pakistan lamentation, is Fawad Alam in the mix?

Samiuddin: Hundred per cent. Not lost so much as ignored. Overlooked. Spat upon. Trampled.

Monster on a monstrous pitch: Jesse Ryder cut, drove and hooked to 83 in the 2011 World Cup quarter-final in Mirpur, while other batsmen struggled Getty Images

Monga: But we're drawing the line at Ahmed Shahzad?

Fernando: I'd like to throw two Kiwi names into the mix. Both of whom played 18 Tests. Both players of extreme quality. Lost to the game for reasons very different to Asif.

Samiuddin: Martin Guptill?

Fernando: Hah, no one so painfully vanilla. The first I'm thinking of, of course, is Jesse Ryder.

Samiuddin: Did you not once spend an entire six-month period of your life trying to chase him down?

Fernando: For a potential feature, yes, highly unsuccessfully. He was still playing. And still burning bridges. It was like the story hadn't actually stopped unravelling, so no one really wanted to talk about it.

Ryder just had such an instinctive feel for the game, whichever format he was playing. A rock-solid defence, a brutal pull shot, threw all of himself into those drives. When he middled it, you couldn't actually see the ball before it reappeared outside the boundary rope.

Monga: Underrated bowler and exceptional catcher to go with it. And he sold out stadiums. People came to watch Jesse Ryder.

Fernando: He was a monster at backward point.

Samiuddin: In that 2011 World Cup quarter-final in Dhaka, pitch like porridge - that was the only time I saw Ryder play and, my lord, if that wasn't the innings of that tournament. His timing that day was freakishly good. On that pitch - and the thing is, it's difficult to articulate - the difference in watching him bat and others that day was just so, so vast that you had to question yourself. Like, were you assessing the pitch wrong and were the rest just crap?

Monga: New Zealand is so not the country for Jesse. I remember him scoring a flawless double-century against India in Napier, and then breaking a chair or something in disgust when he got out. You can guess what got reported the next day.

Fernando: So I remember this crazy Ryder innings, where again, at the end, a chair got smashed (after a lot of Sri Lankan bowlers had also been smashed).

Samiuddin: I'm seeing a pattern here...

Monga: If I were the coach I would carry extra chairs.

Fernando: It was in the 2009 Champions Trophy. Ryder pulls a hamstring or a calf very early in this match. I think he was 7 off 7 or something like that. Basically can't run. And so he just starts blasting boundaries. Ten fours and a six - 74 off 58 balls.

Monga: He wasn't much for foot movement anyway, but somehow always played close to his body.

Forget the batting for a minute: Ryder also took blinders, like this one to dismiss Upul Tharanga in the 2011 World Cup semi-final AFP

Fernando: Opening partner Brendon McCullum, who is supposed to be this shining paragon of Kiwi aggression, ambles to 42 off 74 at the other end. Eventually Ryder gets out, and he's clearly not happy. Just when he thinks he's out of view of the cameras, he absolutely lays into a plastic chair. Just destroys it with his bat. Except, of course, he wasn't out of view. This was seen and replayed many times. I'm sorry but I loved everything about that.

Samiuddin: Actually more than anything else, New Zealand need(ed) Ryder in their team to shed themselves of the "nicest guys in cricket" tag. I mean, yeah, of course, runs and stuff, but they need a guy in that side who does things like that.

Fernando: The New Zealand hill I will absolutely die on is that they would have converted one of their two World Cup finals into a win if Ryder was in the team. I don't blame the people who kicked Ryder out, really, because he's been given chances by many coaches in various continents - both domestic and international - and he's not managed to rein his behaviour in. But if Ryder had managed to improve the behaviour to juuust within that line, I think we would think of New Zealand as one of the great teams of the last decade, instead of just a very good one. And also just the thought of Williamson trying to captain Ryder - there could have been books written and films made just on that relationship.

Monga: I just feel cricket, especially the international variety, is very tough on someone like Jesse. It would have been a miracle if he had survived. Ross Taylor and Ryder were both discovered together. Neither came from a privileged background, but Taylor's privilege was that he had his act together. Mark Greatbatch, one of their earlier coaches, I remember, told me how Ryder was more skilled but Taylor was more rounded as a person. Ryder would throw up in the bin at the nets, Taylor would come home with a bottle of wine.

Samiuddin: Without knowing the details and insider stuff, was he so, so, so difficult to handle that they really couldn't find a place for him in the team at all? Or make it work somehow?

Fernando: They didn't throw him away lightly, tbf. They gave chances. And many people - agents, coaches, mentors - have tried various approaches and it's not worked out.

Samiuddin: I think that is the other point about these players, that they make so much of an impression, you're always left feeling somehow if the others - boards, teams, managers, agents - had just done something else/more he would have been okay.

Monga: More than anything, they also tell us that sometimes you have to accept things as they are. Especially when a team such as New Zealand does all it can get to keep you in. What joy it was to watch him in full flow. But it wasn't meant to be.

Samiuddin: Who was the other Kiwi?

Fernando: Okay, yes, enough Ryder. Someone who was at the other end of the spectrum in terms of temperament, but also glorious to watch in full flow. Guesses?

Samiuddin: Bond. The name is Bond.

Fernando: Nailed it. Like, Shane Bond with his yorkers.

Samiuddin: Bond is long gone as a bowler, but I feel like he's everywhere in the actions of so many modern fast bowlers.

Shane Bond, destroyer of Australia, failed by his own body Getty Images

Fernando: Huge influence on Tim Southee and Trent Boult.

Monga: Strike rate of 38 but couldn't play enough to get more than his 87 wickets.

Samiuddin: Adam Milne, Matt Henry - all their actions. Naseem Shah.

Fernando: And if we agree that aughts Australia had assembled the greatest ODI batting line up, Bond was the greatest destroyer of that top order. Seventeen matches v Aus: average of 15.79, SR of 21.4, economy rate 4.41 - there's no touching that in ODIs

Samiuddin: Bond, in a very different way, is the epitome of what Monga said earlier, about how it's just meant to be for some. No off-field issues (that I can think of), great guy to have in a team. But just had a body that couldn't sustain it.

Monga: In a way I agree, but you can continue working on the body, you can even come back as a bowler with less pace but more wiles, you can still cut yourself a career, but it is different with mental health.

Fernando: Bond just was incredibly, incredibly fragile, though. I'm not sure even turning himself into a medium-pacer - which he has said he was never interested in, btw - would have worked. There were unusual things as well: I remember he once went off the field in a match with a migraine and couldn't bowl, and caught absolute hell on talkback radio in New Zealand for being soft.

Samiuddin: Incidentally, Bond talked about the injuries stemming - ironically - from that action, in this great piece on him by Rahul Bhattacharya, at the 2007 World Cup. He talks here about losing a little of that pace.

Fernando: His last Test, which was a fantastic game against Pakistan in Dunedin, he blew them away with pace in the first innings, iirc.

Monga: It was a great Test. Akmal was unleashed in this game, right?

Fernando: Yes, Asif took 4 for 43 as well. Pity Ryder didn't play. It would have been the poster Test for everything we've talked about.

Monga: Ryder was a veteran of wistfulness by then.

Fernando: Fawad Alam was in that Test as well! Here's the wicket description from the first dig: "Bond's breathing fire here, he hits the deck hard from over the wicket, lands it short of a length on middle and Fawad barely had time to react and fend it off, he fails to drop his gloves down and the ball shaves his glove before landing safely in McCullum's hands."

Underrated, but celebrated: would Ryan Harris have had a greater impact had big names not kept him out of the Australian team early in his career? Getty Images

Monga: While sticking with fast bowlers, I have a name that I am not sure you will agree with. It is more down to having been kept out by big names throughout his 20s, but what we saw of Ryan Harris in 27 Tests in his 30s (also cut short by a back surgery, which he went to after taking a last wicket in the dying moments of a momentous Test) makes me wonder with a little disappointment what a great bowler we lost out on.

Samiuddin: Absolutely, only four more Tests than Asif.

Monga: And what an Asif-like bowler too.

Samiuddin: But I also feel with Harris that Australia celebrated him so much, that he was part of so many big moments against South Africa and England - big series - that he kind of lived a full career… which, of course, he never did in reality

Fernando: And I guess that the injuries came at an age when you expect those things to happen to a quick. Whereas Asif's exit seemed so premature.

Monga: His wrist admittedly did less magic than Asif, but his accuracy was stifling. He lived by the Asif philosophy: if I beat the bat, I should be hitting the pad or the stumps; if I take the edge, it should go to keeper or first slip

Samiuddin: Except, quicker than Asif. Always felt Stuart Clark was the more like-for-like Asif bowler

Monga: We love Asif for the highlights reels his wickets make it to, but arguably Harris has provided us with better seam porn. Have a look at this. This also reminds me, I recently saw Harris seam a ball in the IPL. That I would never have believed had there been no video evidence.

Samiuddin: Asif seamed some balls in the IPL too - 2008.

Fernando: What a trip it is now to think that Pakistan players actually took part in the IPL.

Monga: The greatest loss to cricket: Pakistan players missing the IPL.

Samiuddin: Snap.

Fernando: Genuinely, though, they would have changed the dynamic of that tournament so much. And you suspect the IPL would have changed Pakistan cricket as well.

Samiuddin: But the PSL may not have happened also... Or maybe it would have happened earlier.

Fernando: Umar Gul would have cut it up.

Samiuddin: And Sohail Tanvir as the greatest T20 bowler ever?

Chris Lewis: the blueprint for Jofra Archer? Getty Images

Fernando: Lasith Malinga would still have crushed it, let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Samiuddin: I know I'm being old and boomer-y but Malinga in Tests, I feel, is an unfulfilled thing.

Monga: Malinga would have made a bowler of great spells in Test cricket. Innocuous for long whiles, but then a switch would flick on and he would run through three-four guys in one three-over spell on a humid day at the SSC.

Samiuddin: Yes and that three-over spell would have turned the day, the Test, even the series.

Fernando: If you can hustle a fantastic batsman with a bouncer in Galle, you're a decent bowler. But then with Malinga, it's kind of a double-edged sword. You don't have Malinga if you don't have that action. And you probably can't have that action and a long Test career. What makes him is what breaks him. Unlike, say Bond, who could conceivably have had a long career with a better body.

Samiuddin: Before starting this I had made a list of all the players that would feature here: Shaun Tait, Vinod Kambli, Mohammad Zahid, Asif, Ryder, Wasim Raja, all of South Africa before return, Chris Lewis…

Chris Lewis, man. I watch Jofra and I get strong Lewis vibes. Not in terms of the pace or anything, but in how easily he did things, without showing any signs of the strain and toll it takes on a body. Though who knows how quick Lewis was - no speed guns in his time and he was never celebrated for his pace. But he could bat a bit, great in the field, loose and easy action.

Monga: Did we get enough of Steve Harmison?

Samiuddin: Yes. Harmison played 63 Tests.

Fernando: But I think we've mostly exhausted this chat now. We're dipping into the '90s, and now discussing players who actually had decently long careers. We'll be talking about Kevin Pietersen next. I've just sat in on too many conversations in England about what a loss KP was. And he played 104 Tests.

Samiuddin: In England if you don't play 150 Tests, you ain't nothing.

Monga: And now the rhinos have him. Poor rhinos. Though I think he is actually doing something for them.

Fernando: He's probably trash-talking them behind their backs. Anyway, I think this conversation has degenerated. Like the actions of so many fast bowlers gone before their time.

Osman: Yeah, I think we're done.

Fernando: Let's call it. I don't know about you guys, but I'm going to put on some Asif highlights reels, eat huge quantities of ice cream straight from the tub, and cry myself to sleep.

[werm-whole-skwerm]

all of 'em, kiddo. every. single. last. question.

J A Y, YOU FUCKING TURD.

1. How long have you had a Tumblr?5 years. This shit blog turned 5 last month.

2. Describe your first kiss, who was it with, what was it like, where was it etc?It was gross. It was with a boy named Tyler that I was dating at the time. We had been dating for 3 months, and we were at my house watching tv in the den, and I was on his lap, and he leaned down and kissed me and I just went with it. It was gross and sloppy and there was teeth.

3. What’s your biggest regret? I know we all say we don’t regret things but obviously it’s how we learn, from our mistakes. So what’s something from your past you wished you could have changed?The last time I saw my mom before she died, I didn’t hug her, and I wish I did.

4. Favorite Songs at the moment?One Jump Ahead - Sugita TomokazuChim Chim Cher-ee - Terashima TakumaDeal With - OldCodexCollar Full - Panic! At The DiscoBeez In The Trap - Nicki MinajRoundabout - YesI Want You - Savage Garden

5. What is the craziest thing that you have ever done?I smuggled a friend over state lines without her parents knowing.

6. What’s the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you?I tripped at my graduation. Like I hit the step with my shoe and almost fell.

7. Do you have any scars and if so, how did you get them?I have a scar on my right upper arm from getting burnt when I was a kid. I have a scar on my right index finger cause I just lost skin on it going to math class one day? I have a scar on the base of my left thumb from getting it closed in a van window as a kid. My right knee is scarred from falling off my bike as a kid and then a week later doing the same thing and scrapping off the scab and making it worse. I used to have self-harm scars, but I don’t know if they’re there anymore.

8. Where would you like to be in 10 years?Hopefully in an apartment with my friends or my girlfriend with a pug named The Pug Formerly Known as Bagels and doing what I love.

9. What are your views on drugs and alcohol?I don’t really condone drugs past weed and I don’t personally use any form of drug. The exception being alcohol. I love drinking alcohol. I love being drunk.

10. What are your views on religion?Well I’m an atheist, so I don’t really believe in religion, but also if you prescribe to a certain religion then that’s your business and it’s not my place to pass judgment or try to tell you otherwise. Just don’t shove your religion down my throat and accost me for being a non-believer, and I won’t bother you.

11. Have you ever thought about ending your own life? If so, why?Yes, many many times. When I was a teenager I researched different methods of suicide and how I wanted to do. I had things picked out. I still sometimes want to die. I can’t tell you why really. I can’t say it’s all too much or too much stress or anything, but I’m just tired of living and feel like a waste.

12. Write 5 facts people might not know about you.-I’m adopted.-I have 4 siblings, an older brother, an older sister, a younger sister, and a younger brother in that order.-I have a phobia of newspaper.-I was in JROTC for 4 years and won a national award.-I was in honors and AP classes from the age of 10-17.

13. last really important text you got? I know it’s probably not important sounding, but she had texted me about being lucky I was her friend and it made my life.

14. Can you let go?Eventually. It takes a while, but I’m capable of it.

15. Discuss your first love.He was someone I met on Tumblr. He had messaged me something, I could probably find it in my inbox still probably. But we met through here, and he was just great. I loved everything about him. We talked all night, said things to each other that we wouldn’t tell anyone else, were always talking. Every time I saw him I got butterflies and freaked out. He was honestly something amazing to me, but it never came to fruition. I spent 2 years having an unrequited love for this boy until I realized I was gay.

16. Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up. Explain why each song is on there.Roundabout is on here because I fucking love JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure and it’s a good song.One-Eighty by Summer is on here because Taking Back Sunday used to be my favorite band when I was younger, and I still really like them, but this was also my favorite song for a while when I was a teenager.Kick Me is on here because it’s the only good song Sleeping With Sirens has had in years.Creature is on here because I used to really love Asking Alexandria, and From Death to Destiny is one of my favorite albums of theirs, and this was briefly my favorite song.Stained Glass Eyes And Colorful Tears is on here because I fucking love Pierce the Veil, and this song is so beautiful and great and emotional.Jesus Christ is on here because I love Brand New, I grew up with it, and it’s sad, like me, and can be applied to any ship to make you sad, and I am about that life. It’s also just really good.I Love You 5 is on here because I just added a bunch of Never Shout Never. I never listen to it anymore, but I did used to love it as a teenager.Truce is on here because Vessel is an amazing album and I love twenty one pilots.Let It Roll is on here because I’m a slut for All Time Low and their sophomore album was great.Guns for Hands is on here because, as I said, Vessel is an amazing album and I love twenty one pilots.

17. Name somewhere you’d like to move or visit.Japan

18. Are you currently missing someone?Not really. The only person I would be missing I’ve been talking to for like 16 and a half hours.

19. What are your views on mainstream music?It’s popular for a reason. It’s not bad, and people should just let people enjoy what the fuck they want without being a dick.

19. At what age do you think people should have sex?I’m not at a place to be able to dictate when someone should have sex. Personally speaking, I feel like anything under 18, when you’re a legal adult, is too soon, but it’s up to you. That being said, children really under 16 shouldn’t, but, again, that’s not my place to say.

20. What are your highs and lows of this past year?Well in 2017, I pulled myself out of a depression and met an amazing girl that’s one of my closest friends that I adore. Downside, I’ve been depressed basically all fucking year so far.

21. What are your strongest beliefs?Equal rights for all genders and sexualities, true equal opportunity for people to have homes and doctor. God. I don’t even know anymore.

22. Who are you closest to in your family?My nephew I guess. He’s more like a friend to me than a nephew. My mom biologically speaking I guess.

23. How important do you think education is?So fucking important.

24. What’s one of your favorite shows?Catfish

25. How have you changed in the past 2 years?God, everything. I’ve gotten better about my anxiety and depression. I’ve come to terms with my sexuality. I’ve opened up more, been more honest. I’m a better person now.

26. Name 5 people who are famous who you find attractive.Sakurai Takahiro, Yamanaka Takuya, Morita Taka, Eguchi Takuya, Suzuki Tatsuhisa

27. Name your favorite movie and what it’s about.Naruto: Road to Ninja. Naruto gets thrown into Bizzaro World essentially.

28. Who is someone who fascinates you and why?Boi, this is gay, but Cam. She’s just astounding to me. I love learning things about her and talking to her about everything. I don’t know why. Maybe because I have the biggest crush on her?

29. What kind of person attracts you?Usually the nerd type. Or the tattooed and pierced type.

30. What’s a problem that you have recently had or are currently having?Uh, well, I have a huge crush on one of my closest friends with like no chance of it being reciprocated? I guess that counts.

31. Name something that you miss.Candy and soda. I’m on a diet.

32. Share 5 goals you want completed in the next 30 days.-Get my shit sent off to my new college-Definitively find an apartment-At least play some FFXV and BOTW-Start driving lessons-Pass my classes

33. What’s been the highlight of your month and the lowest point? The highlight has just been reconnecting with Cam more closely. The lowest is probably stressing myself out so bad I almost cried.

34. What’s something that you’ve done in the past that you would never do again?Suck dick

35. What is you’re biggest insecurity & why?Just me as a whole. I’m insecure about everything I am because my whole life I’ve been told I wasn’t good enough, that my sister was better than I was, that I had to live up to these expectations, and now I’m insecure about my body, personality, ethnicity. Just everything.

36. What were the last 3 songs you listened to and what did they mean to you?Roundabout, Kick Me, and Stained Glasses Eyes and Colorful Tears. They each mean something different to me, some aspect of my life represented. The weeb, the wannabe rebel, and the sad sappy bitch.

37. Do you have a toy that’s really special to you and if so what is it, how did you get it etc?I have a pink teddy bear named Pinky Bear that i got in 2000 when I first moved to Georgia to live with my new family. My dad’s coworker brought us toys and she was my first teddy bear and she still sleeps in my bed to this day.

38. Have you lost anyone close to you to death? My mom, grandma, and uncle have all died.

39. What is your purpose in life?To die.

40. When was the last time you cried and what was it over?It was a couple months ago, maybe 2. It was the ending of Final Fantasy XV.

41. If you got to spend an entire day with your favourite celebrity what would you guys do? Play video games, eat junk food, watch anime. I don’t really know.

42. If you could only listen to one artist for the rest of your life, who would you choose and why?Panic! At The Disco because none of Brendon’s music sounds the same and there’s such a wide variety.

43. What are 3 traits that you like about yourself and what are three that you dislike about yourself? Personality wise.I like the fact, I guess, I’m pretty loyal to my friends, I like what I like and that’s just gonna be a thing I’ll talk about forever, I’m pretty decently chill and try to make everyone feel welcome. Boi, I dislike the fact that I’m fucking stubborn to a goddamn t,I will grit my teeth and bear through anything anyone does to me no matter how depressed or uncomfortable it makes me, I will literally break myself just to do something for someone else.

44. Can you cook? If so what are your favorite dishes to make? Nope :)

45. What was the last decision you regretted making?I sent Cam a stupid pickup line because it was both hilarious to me and I wanted an excuse to flirt with her, and I wanted to die.

46. Do you believe in the saying “once a cheater, always a cheater”?Yes. Wholeheartedly.

47. Do you ever wish you were famous?Online famous yes. Not real famous. I wanna be a great online personality and cosplayer. But I’m a loser who doesn’t have a personality or do cosplay well.

48. What’s the nastiest thing anyone has ever said to YOU? Or something that’s hurt you above anything else and why?My ex boyfriend blamed me for causing his anxiety attacks and threatened suicide multiple times when I realistically, or even joked, about breaking up with him. It really messed me up.

50. What mark would you want to leave on this world after you are gone?I want to have left someone happier than when i found them. If I can make one person’s life better, I’ll be happy.

51. Have you ever thought of having plastic surgery?All the time.

52. Have you ever jumped in the pool with your clothes on?Not yet.

53. Have you ever slapped a boy in the face?Of course I have.

54. What’s the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for you?Nothing. No one ever does anything for me.

55. What is one of your favorite memories?All night roadtrip to Nashville with my friends. I won an InuYasha at a truck stop.

58. What’s the nicest present you’ve ever received?My ex girlfriend sent me the Clear nendoroid I really wanted.

59. Have you ever had your heart broken?So many times.

60. Have you ever wanted to change anything about your life? If so, what?Literally everything. Take your pick, I’ve wanted to change it.

61. What is something you feel like you are really good at? Being depressed.

62. What are your top 5 favourite all time songs by your favourite artist?Collar FullSarah SmilesCamisadoHurricaneGirls/Girls/Boys

65. What’s one thing someone has done for you that was really small but made a huge impact?Checked on me when I was feeling depressed.

66. What do you do when you can’t sleep?Bother Cam is she’s awake. if not, then just watch Youtube videos until I basically pass out.

68. If you could change 3 things within your government, what would they be and why?Donald Trump, the Trump administration, the republican party

69. What’s your favourite holiday and why?Halloween cause free dress up holiday.

70. What’s the kindest thing a stranger has ever done for you? Even if it’s TINY like holding a door open for you, something that you remember even though they were a complete stranger.Someone, I cannot remember her name, called me pretty out in public and it made my life????

71. Who’s your favorite cartoon character?Does Sasuke Uchiha count????

72. What’s the first song that comes to your mind while reading this and why?Concrete because I’m listening to it.

74. What would you like to be the first dance song at your wedding?twenty one pilots’ cover of Can’t Help Falling In Love.

75. Have you ever been told you look like a famous person, if so, who?Nope. Never.

76. What’s one thing you can not live without?My phone. It has everything i need on it.

77. What is the most selfless thing you have ever done for someone?I literally have no idea.

78. Are you a girly girl?Fam, I’m barely a girl half the time.

79. What color is your bed?My sheets are brown, but my quilt is mainly red.

80. Do you prefer light or dark haired guys?I prefer no guys.

81. Are you currently frustrated with a boy?I’m constantly frustrated with their existence.

82. Do you have a best friend?Like two or three.

82. What song makes you cry the most?SECOND & SEBRING

83. What’s the funniest film you’ve ever seen?I have no idea tbh. I don’t watch many movies.

84. What’s something crazy that you’ve always wanted to do?Lowkey wanna skydive, but terrified of heights.

85. Has anything ever happened to you that you just can’t forgive?My existence.

86. Ever been really drunk?Almost every weekend.

87. Is there any type of rumor going around about you?That would require people knowing and caring about me.

89. Have you ever felt ashamed about something? If so what was it & why? Everything I’ve ever said and done.

90. Do you keep a journal? If so what mostly goes in it? Random thoughts, feelings, stories?That’s what my Tumblr is for.

91. Do you like somebody?Yes. So fucking much. I think I’m dying.

92. Craziest shit ever done?Left town in the middle of the night with friends without telling anyone?

93. What’s the saddest story/one that’s touched you the most that you’ve ever heard on the news?I dunno. I don’t really watch the news.

94. If you were told you were going to have 3 daughters, what would you want to name them?Nixie, Valor, Elliott

95. Do you have a middle name and if so, what is it?Ugh. Yeah. It’s Marie.

96. Are you in a relationship?Nope, but I sure wish.

97. Do you enjoy drama?When I’m not involved.

98. Are you a virgin?Sure as hell am.

99. Are you short or tall?Short af, fam.

100. Do you have siblings? If so, what are their names and how old are they? Andres - 31Olivia - 26Ariana - 18Jacob - 17

[ghcstkinq]

you should do all the character questions!!!! for your favorite oc

ahhhhh thank you for this my dude!!! sorry it’s really late lmfao i’ve been super busy!! ummm i can’t decide my favorite oc, so i’m just going to do the main character in my book! his name is ezra meyer and he’s my life tbh. it’s a lot of questions, so i’m going to put it under the cut.

01.  What does your character’s name mean? Did you pick it for the symbolism, or did you just like the way it sounded?

His name is Ezra! It means, “Helper”! I picked it for symbolism but also it’s one of my favorite names.

02. What is one of your character’s biggest insecurities? Are they able to hide it easily or can others easily exploit this weakness?

His biggest insecurity would be his financial situation. It’s pretty obvious, honestly.

03. What would be their favorite physical trait about themselves?

He loves his hair!

04. What are their favorite traits about their lover? (one psychological and one physical)

He loves how Raphael always tries to keep the mood mellow, and how knowledgeable he is in general. Physically, he just loves everything about him.

05. Are they sexually confident or more of the shy type?

Shy06. Do they have any hobbies that their lover finds unusual, odd, or otherwise annoying?

Raphael finds anything that has to do with being a psychic unusual, but nothing Ezra does is annoying to him.

07. Is there a catchphrase or sound that they tend to make a lot (likely without being aware of it)?

He makes annoyed sounds without really noticing all the time.

08. What is, perhaps, their biggest flaw? Are they aware of this or oblivious to it?

He never forgets or forgives anything. He’s aware to it, but he’s too bitter to really care.

09. Do they have a favorite season? What about a favorite holiday?

He loves Autumn! He doesn’t have a favorite holiday though.

10. Is your character more feminine or masculine?

He’s somewhere in the middle, probably leaning more towards feminine, though.11. What is something that would make your character fly into a rage?

Disrespecting his friends/family. Lying to him.

12. Is there some particular talent, skill, or attribute that they simply could not give up?

His artistic talents. He would give up being psychic in a second, but art is his life.

13. What are your character’s sleeping habits? Heavy or light sleeper? Blanket stealer? One that always rolls onto the floor? Pushes their lover onto the floor? Sleep talker or walker?

He rarely sleeps, so when he does, he’s out. He loves to warmth, so he steals blankets. He mumbles in his sleep sometimes when he’s especially stressed.

14. Do they live alone or with family? How do they feel about their family/roommates?

He lives with his family (mom, brother, twin sisters, aunt, and cousin) and he’s really close to all of them.

15. Is there a certain person in this world that they cannot stand? The very mention of this person’s name makes them tremble with anger or fear.Seth. It’s his dad’s name, and he was… awful. The feelings he has when his name is said is a mixture of sadness, anger, fear, and loathing.

16. Is your character the athletic type or more of a couch potato? What are some sports/games that they like?

He’s not really athletic, but he’s not really a couch potato, either. He’s always doing something. HE skates.

17. Does your character have dreams of getting married and/or having children?

No. He doesn’t really want kids, because he’s scared he’ll screw them up. (He’s scared just being around his siblings is screwing them up, too.)

18. What kind of home would they want to live in? Where would they place this abode?

He would want a home big enough to accommodate his friends and family and that has his very own art room. He doesn’t really wanna leave Massachusetts.

19. Would your character be the kind to get into fights? (physical or verbal) Would they be a good fighter or cave in rather easily?

He gets into verbal fights very frequently, but if it gets violent, he backs out.

20. Does your character like animals? What are some of their favorite animals? Would they want pets? What about mythological creatures?He loves every animal ever, especially deer! His favorite mythological creature are dragons.

21. What is one of your character’s biggest fears? How would they react when dealing with this fear?

His biggest fear is not being able to help his loved ones, or his loved ones dying. For the first one, he would just feel incredibly guilty. If they died, he would be in a depressive state for a long time.

22. What kind of tattoos, piercings, birthmarks, freckles, and other such unique physical features do they have?

He has a lot of freckles and a vaguely star shaped birthmark on the top of his cheek.

23. What is your character like when it comes to school? What subjects are they good/bad at? Do they get in trouble a lot or are well behaved?

He’s very quiet at school in general. He’s really good at English and History, but not much else.

24. In their own words, how would your character describe what their lover is like?

“Raphael is… a loser. He’s always making jokes and keeping things positive. He’s always asking how everyone is and doesn’t expect the same in return. He’s really nice, and the most caring person that I’ve ever met. Well, he can be an asshole. But to the people he cares about, he’s so sweet. He’s… well, to put it shortly, he’s the best. Don’t tell him I said that.”

25. Is there something traumatic from your character’s past that greatly affects them even to this day?Watching his father abuse his mother. His father leaving. Brendon dying.

26. What is their lover like sexually? How do they feel about their lover’s quirks, needs, etc?

Raphael is very dominant. Ezra enjoys it.

27. If your character was going to get arrested, what would be the most likely reason for it?

Loitering, or talking back to a cop.

28. If your character became a celebrity, what would they be famous for?

His art.

29. What is one of the most courageous things your character has ever done for a loved one?

Punching Raphael in the face for bullying Frank. (Long story short, before they offically met, Frank  got suspended for fighting even though he was getting his ass beat. Frank told Ezra that it was the captain of the soccer team, and Ezra walked up to him after a game and punched him in the face.

30. When it comes to the arts (music, film, theater, etc), what does your character like?

All of them! 31. Would your character be the kind capable of killing? Would they enjoy killing or only use it when necessary or, perhaps, refuse to kill no matter what?

He would kill if he believed it was absolutely necessary, but he wouldn’t feel good about it.

32. If your character’s lover offered to take them out on a dream date, what would they want to do?

He would want to go to different art museums.

33. If your character wanted to be alone, where would they go?

His room with the door locked and music blaring so everyone knows not to come in.

34. Does your character have favorite foods? (breakfast, lunch, dinner, dessert, snacks, etc)

He loves anything chocolate-y. He also really loves pasta.

35. Is your character afraid of death? If they got to choose how to die, how would they want to go?

No, as a psychic, he’s knows sort of what life after death is like, so he’s had time to accept it. He’d want go in the least painful way possible.36. Does your character have any medical conditions? Are they serious or minor? Do they affect their day to day life?

No, nothing serious.

37. What are some of your character’s pet peeves? What are some things that annoy them or disgust them?

He hates people that always try to one-up other people. He also hates bigotry.

38. What kind of weather does your character like? Cloudy skies, rainy days, sunshine, etc?

He likes cloudy days that aren’t too cold.

 39. When people look at your character, is there some assumption they might make about them just by appearance? Is that assumption correct?

They would probably assume that he’s an artist and a nerd, which is pretty true.

 40. Does your OC have any guilty pleasures they enjoy? Hobbies, past times, music, etc that they wouldn’t want known by others?

He really loves watching and reading shitty romance things, especially if it’s LGBT. He’d be mortified if anyone found out.

41. Does your character’s family affect your character in any way?

His family affects him very positively, as they are all supportive of each other.

 42. Is there anything in your character’s past that they regret, haunts them, or they wish they could change?

He wishes he would’ve talked to Brendon before he died. And he wishes he could talk to his father before he left.

 43. Does your character have a switch that changes aspects of their personality whether they are around friends, family, etc. Is there someone who gets to see their true self?

He’s more guarded around his friends, but he’s pretty much the same all around, or at least he tries to be. Frank and Brendon are the people who have seen his truest self. His younger sisters don’t ever see how sad he gets, but that’s about it.

 44. Is there a particular event that would emotionally devastate your character?

His mother or siblings dying or getting seriously hurt.

 45. Is your character the kind to hide their true emotions or do they wear their heart on their sleeve?

He hides his emotions, for the most part. If he’s feeling really strongly, he doesn’t hide it that well.

 46. What is some random affectionate thing that your character always does to their lover?

If he sees Raphael is upset, he’ll hold his hand and rub it with his thumb.

47. Is your character outgoing? Would they be the leader of the friend group, or the quiet one that gets dragged along?

He’s definitely outgoing, even if he’s quiet at school, he’s not afraid to talk to them. He’s more of a leader of his friends than anything.

48. Is there anything in particular that would ignite your character’s jealousy? Or does your character not get envious?

Ezra get jealous so easily. It could be over a smile, or joking a little too much.

49. What is something that your character has nightmares about? Are these frequent? Do they heavily affect your character’s mood?

Ezra’s nightmares are always about Brendon, his father, or something in the future. They are frequent, and they do tend to make him a little more irritable for a few hours after having woken up from one.

50. If your character confessed love to their crush, boyfriend, girlfriend, etc, what would they say?

He would write a note (complete with a few drawings) telling them how he feels. But he usually would rather die than say he loves someone first.