#bucky x reader fanfic

[jamdoughnutmagician]

All The Way Down.

Bucky Barnes x Plus Size!Female Reader 

Summary:Bucky reminds you just how much of a super-soldier he really is.

Warnings:Smut, 18+, Oral Sex (F Recieving), Face-Sitting, Mentions of shitty past ex-boyfriends, Dirty Talk, Bucky eats pussy for his own pleasure

Word Count:1,232

Authour’s Note: I kinda wanted to try to get back into writing for Bucky since I hadn’t done so for a while so it might not be the best writing but it’s here and it’s filthy, so there’s that

also this is for all my fellow thick-gals who just want a super-soldier bf to tr-eat them right.

MASTERLIST

When it came to you, Bucky was insatiable. He was perfectly happy to be spread out on the bed on his stomach, with each of your thighs thrown over his shoulders whilst his tongue and fingers worked their magic on your pussy.

When he was in one of those moods, then there was very little that would be able to separate him from you.

And tonight he seemed to be in that particular mood, as he licked his tongue through your folds, gently as he helped to ride out the aftershocks of your second orgasm of the night. 

“Doll..Want you to sit on my face…please..” he mumbled as he placed sloppy kisses to the inside of your thigh.

That was something that, until now, you had been avoiding. He’d politely asked you about it before, trying to get from you what he so badly desired. You so far had swatted away his advances with a kind smile and a little white lie that you had been too tired. You’d always assumed that you were too heavy, and past boyfriends and hook-ups had been less than kind to you when it came to how to handle a bigger girl in the bedroom. So from then on, you tried to save yourself the embarrassment and opted rather to either lay back or to be on the giving end of pleasure.

Bucky couldn’t lie, your rejections had hurt his pride, but he couldn’t help but feel like there was a reason why you didn’t want to do this with him, and it wasn’t because you were too tired. 

His mind ran through all the times you’d been together in the bedroom (and the few occasions outside of the bedroom too) and all the things that you’d done together, when he suddenly came around to the thought that not only had you never ridden his face, you’d also never been on top of him. That wasn’t right, he thought to himself. That needed to change right away and he was going to get you on top of him one way or another.

“It’s okay, baby, you don’t have to do that.” you say sweetly as you run your fingers through his hair from between your thighs.

“No, I know I don’t have to do it, but I want to. Want you to ride my face, Sweets.” he says with such a sweet earnestness that it almost breaks your heart with how much he loves you and wants to please you.

“Buck, please…”  you say as you withdraw your legs from over his shoulders and pull them up to your chest, sitting at the head of the bed.

“I’ve never pressed you about this, I’ve never wanted to make you feel uncomfortable, but you’ve never wanted to be on top..like ever…and I just have to ask, why?” his steely grey-blue eyes looking at you in question.

You felt safe with Bucky. Safer than you had ever felt with any of your past boyfriends. He was sweet to you, and he deserved the truth. 

Huffing out a breath to steady your nerves you looked at your boyfriend before speaking.

“I know I’m not the daintiest of girls, okay? I’m bigger and heavier than most girls, and I guess past boyfriends always made me feel insecure about being on top.” you explained.

Bucky listened carefully as you talked through your feelings.

“So, just to save myself the embarrassment and stop the insecurities creeping in, I always decline to get on top. I know most guys aren’t going to enjoy being squashed underneath me” you chuckle that last part, trying to lighten the mood.

“I’m not most guys, Doll.” He says to you confidently. 

You look at him, not totally understanding where he was going with this, so you let him continue.

“It seems as though you’ve forgotten that your boyfriend is a super-soldier, Doll.” he smiles “I promise you I’m strong enough to handle anything you throw my way, and believe me when I tell you that I would be happy man with a pretty thing like you sat on my face. I wanna fuckin’ drown in you, sweets.” he finishes, his voice dropping to a seductive growl and coming over to you to place a hungry kiss on your lips.

Looking deep in your eyes once more, he gives you a cheeky wink before laying on his back stretched out with his head resting on his hands 

“C’mon dollface, what are you waiting for? Your throne awaits.” His cheeky charm never fails to make you blush. 

You make your way over to him, cautiously swinging your leg over his body until you were straddling his chest, hovering over him.

“My face is up here, Sweets” he says, tapping his fingers to his chin to prove his point.

You shuffled further up his body until you’re hovering over his face, and you could see his lazy smile between your thighs.

You feel both his strong arms wrap themselves around your thighs, the contrast of the warmth of his hand and the metal of his other hand is a strangely grounding feeling that you welcome wholeheartedly. 

“I said sit on my face, sweets, none of this hovering, I want you to sit all the way down.” he growls before he locks his arms around your thighs and pulls you close.

His tongue ran the length of your pussy, lapping up the dripping wetness of your arousal. He was tasting you as though he was a man starved, the rumbling vibrations of his moans and groans sending shivers down your spine.

Suddenly you found your hips rocking themselves against your boyfriend's face, the tip of his nose nudging at your clit had you letting out shameless moans above him.

You can feel his cheeky smirk underneath you.

“That’s it sweets, ride my fuckin’ face…Taste so fuckin’ sweet…” his words are slurred as his tongue drinks you in.

He flicks his tongue over your clit a few times, before swirling around and then moving to suck it between his plump pink lips. The feeling of his scruffy beard against the soft skin of your thighs is a pleasing burn as your thighs clench themselves around his head.

Your hands have found themselves tangled in his hair, thankful that he had chosen to grow it longer again, needing something to ground yourself as you found your head swimming with pleasure.

He knew you were close, he’d seen you desperate for release many times before, he continued tonguing your clit as you whined above him.

“Fuck…Baby Please..feels so good..” 

“That’s it doll, let go for me, sweets..let me taste you..” he slurs continuing to help you roll your hips over his face.

It all felt too good. Too good and too much. The tightening knot in the pit of your stomach snapping, and your orgasm rushing over you as your hips slow to stuttering movements. His tongue laps slow stripes over your wet cunt as you come crashing down from your high.

You swing your body to lie next to him, your chest heaving with breaths you break the silence that had fallen between you both.

“I do believe it’s my turn to return the favour, Sarge” you say sweetly as your lips begin kissing a trail down his toned abs.

“Well…I ain’t ever gonna say no to that, Dollface.”

[welldonebeca]

Glitter and Goo (iii)

Summary: When you have to go on a mission to a different planet together, Bucky is hit by a mating ritual flower, and some feelings you two have been hiding come up. AKA: It’s a sex pollen fic with a side of breeding kink. WC: 1.8k words Warnings: Romantic tension. Fluff. Dirty talking. Passionate sex. Breeding kink. Praising kink. Size difference. Cock warming. A/N: Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me... y'all know the deal. It's my birthday, you get smut.

If you like my work, consider buying me a coffee or subscribing to my Patreon. It’s just $2 a month and I promise you won’t regret it.

Masterlist

Bucky climbed onto the mattress and you grabbed him quickly, pulling him close and kissing him hungrily.

Yes, you wanted him to fill you. You needed it!

His cock brushed against your leg, and you spread your thighs.

"In me," you pleaded. "Bucky. Please."

You were so empty! You needed him.

But he didn't give it to you, no. Instead, Bucky buried his face in your neck, kissing it as his hand fondled your breast.

"Such beautiful tits," Bucky babbled. "Always loved your tits, wanted to kiss them so much."

He pinched your nipples, tugging on them.

"Big tits to feed my big babies," he grunted. "Gonna nurture them with them, right?"

You nodded, swallowing down, and whined when he wrapped his lips around one of your nipples.

"Please," you whined. "Need you!"

Why was he being so mean? You needed him inside you!

Bucky took his lips away, pressing your tits together.

"Gotta prepare you," Bucky bit your nipples. "You're too small."

No you weren't!

You reached down to his cock, hoping you could tempt him into getting inside you, but stopped, shocked, when you wrapped your fingers around him and couldn't close your fingers around him.

Oh.

James put his hands between your legs, and you whimpered when he parted your folds with his fingers.

"You're so wet," he purred. "Just for me, right? Just for my cock?"

His fingers travelled up, circling your clit as his teeth ran over your nipple, biting and sucking.

"Bucky," you whined, squirming under him, the smell of his skin clouding your thoughts a little.

You needed him, you needed his cock! Not his fingers.

Bucky let your tits go, his nose moving between them, his tongue licking your skin.

"Gonna make your tits swell," he promised. "Fill with milk to feed my child."

You moaned at the idea. God, he would put such big babies in you, right? Big healthy babies!

"Please," you begged. "Want your cock inside me. Want you to breed me."

Bucky circled your clit a bit more.

"But I need-"

"I need you!" you pleaded. "I need you, Bucky. Please. Inside me!"

He stopped, and looked at your face, giving you time to put your hands on his cheeks.

"Please, Bucky," you pleaded. "You said you'd breed me, right? I want you, I need you!"

His eyes softened completely, and he nodded weakly before moving up.

You turned a bit for him, though, showing him your ass, and he moaned darkly.

"Want me to fuck you from behind?" he grunted. "Fuck, baby..."

"Please," you insisted. "Bucky!"

He embraced you from behind, placing his cock weeping cock over your pussy, looking so big from where you were looking that you knew you'd feel him there for days.

He pushed the head in, and you moaned at finally - fucking finally - being able to fill him.

"Yes," you cried. "Yes, Bucky, yes."

His cock slipped into you in the easiest way, as if you were only waiting for it your whole life. As if you were waiting just for him.

"You're so wet, baby," he grunted into your neck. "So welcoming!"

Bucky wrapped his arms around you tightly, holding you in close as he moved slowly and gently.

Too slowly and too gently.

"Please," you whined. "Fuck me! Please!"

He held you in place.

"Gotta be careful," Bucky pinched your nipple. "Can't hurt you."

You tugged onto his arm, nearly digging your nails into his arm.

"No," you pleaded. "Want you to hurt me, please."

Bucky froze.

"Doll?" he asked softly.

You pressed your ass against him, trying to get his cock to bottom out inside you.

"Wanna feel you forever," you pleaded. "Please, Bucky!"

It was enough to break him.

James pulled his hips back, slamming his hips into yours and filling you completely before adjusting behind you.

He fucked you in his earnest, fucking you hard and deep, and you moaned in delight.

"Mine," he growled into your neck. "You're just mine."

His arm came around you, and you gasped when he placed his metal arm over your body, with his hand framing your cunt.

"Gonna fill you with cum,"  he promised darkly. "Breed you, show everyone you're mine."

Bucky adjusted you, until his fingers were on your folds and your clit, and you cried out when you felt it vibrating.

"Yes," you cried. "Bucky!"

"Say it," he twisted your nipple with his free hand. "Say you're mine!"

You clung to his arms.

"I'm yours," you cried. "Bucky, I'm yours."

He half growled, face buried in your neck, and your eyes fluttered closed when you felt him throbbing inside your pussy, filling you up suddenly.

But he didn't stop. If anything, Bucky fucked you harder.

Your eyes nearly crossed he continued to move, pushing his cum deep inside you, and you could feel the knot of pleasure growing in your belly.

"Like this?" he moaned into your neck. "Wanted me to fuck you like that, baby? Bruise that pussy with me big cock?"

"Yes," you cried.

Bucky pressed his vibrating hand to your clit.

"Fuck," you felt your body shaking. "Bucky! Bucky, please!"

"Want me to make you cum?" he pressed his lips to your ear. "Want me to make you cum while I breed you, pretty girl? While I give you a baby?"

You nodded, feeling your pussy already fluttering, your body already so fucking ready.

He angled his hand, moving in circles around your clit and angling his cock.

He brushed against the sweetest spot inside, and you cried in pleasure when he did. Bucky adjusted, and with each stroke of his cock hit the perfect spot, making you melt and cry.

"Yes, yes,"  you cried. "Bucky!"

His touches were insistent, unstopping, and you came.

Things got blurry after that, and you couldn't focus on how many times you came and he came.

Bucky fucked his cum deep inside you, always thick and hot, and you welcomed it happily

Oh, how you wished he would breed you there and then.

He  fed you and made sure you drank water in between fucking, though you were pretty sure FRIDAY was the one to remind you two to about it.

By the time you were out of the horny fog, it was time to land the ship.

"Shh, sweet girl," Bucky squeezed you in place with his metal arm. "Gotta keep you safe as we land."

You were sat right on his cock, just your lab coat covering your ass. Bucky was mean to you, making you sit there while he took control of the ship, and if it was the easiest thing you could do while he worked, when it wasn't.

It absolutely wasn't.

You'd fucked for the two whole days, and maybe a little more. Maybe he had decreased the speed of the ship when you were a little closer to Earth so you could see the moon as you came.

This was the last time you two would be fucking in a while.

Two days had left you quite sore.

The effects of the pollen and goo were gone, and while you two hadn't talked, it was a silent understanding that you two were on the same page.

You held onto him when you felt the ship landing, shaking a bit like a plane would.

Bucky only let you go when the ship landed completely.

"FRIDAY, make sure we have a few minutes of privacy," he requested.

"How long, Agent Barnes?"

He thought for a moment.

"20 minutes," he requested. "It's enough."

The system darkened the window in front of you and Bucky moved you gently, caressing your cheek gently.

"You want me to make you cum now, baby?" he offered. "I can just pull out."

You shook your head, hiding your face in his chest. There was no way you could possibly cum anymore.

"Want you to cum in me," you requested, half whining. "Please."

He chuckled.

"What an eager girl, my sweetheart is," Bucky adjusted you, fucking you with shallow thrusts. "Just want cum, baby?"

You nodded, bouncing the littlest bit on his lap.

Fuck, if you ever had to continue with this, you'd have to get an IUD. You couldn't go back to condoms after having his cum freshly fucked into you, you just couldn't.

He held you close and tightly, kissing your temple and cheek sweetly, caressing your back as you bounced gently over him.

Bucky used you with the gentleness of a man who'd learned every bit of your body and pleasure, and you let out a soft moan when he filled you, at last.

…

“Glitter and Goo” was first posted on my Patreon on April 2023. To read it now, subscribe to my page, it’s just $2 a month and I promise you won't regret it.

…

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Glitter and Goo: @art2emily

[minnophee-writes]

Right Where You Were Meant To Be

Fandom: Avengers [Marvel]

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Plus-size Reader

Summary: The reader has a crush on Bucky the second she looked at him but she also has feelings of self-consciousness about her body and doubts she’d ever end up with Bucky or any guy like Bucky. That all changes one night at one of Tony’s parties.

Word Count: 2,760 words

A/N: This is a cute little one-shot idea I had and just wanted to write out. I feel there aren’t many plus-size!reader stories so I wanted to make my own. I’m a chubby girl and felt like I needed some love, lmao. Any mistakes I take responsibility for, this story wasn’t beta read, so I apologize for any mistakes. I hope you enjoy it nonetheless!!! <3 <3 <3 [edit: this is an old fanfic lol]

It all started when you looked at him for the first time. He had just moved into the Tower, and you had just gotten the job as Tony's new assistant since Pepper had become CEO of Stark Industries. Because you worked in an environment with superheroes who were very fit and healthy, you had become self-conscious of yourself; whether it would be what you wore, the things you ate, or just how your body looked in general.

Being a bigger girl, it often took a toll on your mental health when you would notice the glances, the whispering, the judgmental stares, and how shopping for clothes in your size was difficult, and it made you feel like you had to lose weight to fit in and belong. You felt alone and isolated.

You didn't have any friends; you didn't even talk to many of your co-workers, and just kept to yourself a majority of the time. When Bucky moved in, you noticed he did the same. He didn't speak much to the rest of the team, he mostly stayed in his room, and only hung around Steve. Bucky was very fit, and his muscular body showed it whenever he wore tight-fitted clothing. You would never wear tight-fitted clothing for fear of having your plumpness accentuated.

After five months working for Tony and having a more friendly relationship with the rest of the team, you had built a few close bonds with some of the heroes. Wanda and Natasha were your closest girlfriends and would regularly have 'Lady's Nights' every Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays. Tony, Clint, Sam, and Steve were like your older brothers and would look out for you.

You and Steve made it a routine to do small exercise and yoga in the afternoons just after 4 o'clock. How this all started was because you wanted to accomplish small goals for yourself, as Sam told you to do to help with your mental health.

"Steve," You called out as you stepped into the Tower's gym, the one place you knew where to find Steve if he wasn't in the common room.

"Oh, hey (Y/N)! What's up?" Steve turned to face you as he held the punching bag still while he watched you walk closer to him, noticing you fidgeting with your fingers nervously.

"I just... I wanted to start doing light exercises, you know, to boost my endorphins, and so I have something to do in the afternoons when I've finished with work." It wasn't a complete lie, but it just sugar-coated the fact that you just wanted to lose weight to gain confidence in yourself.

Steve had agreed to help you; he wouldn't push you too much either because he didn't want you to strain anything and not push you out of your comfort zone too much. Both of you would exercise for an hour each day in the afternoons. This routine had been going on for six weeks, and you were enjoying it. You felt better about yourself each week when you would check your progress and write down how much you lost during the week; you were more confident than you were all those weeks ago before asking Steve for help.

During one of those afternoon exercises, you and Steve were both in the Adho Mukha pose with Steve wearing his usual tight t-shirt, that you swore was a size too small, and shorts while you wore a loose, black tank top, and tight-fitted leggings that complemented the shape of your plump ass. You were so in the zone that you hadn't heard the gym doors open and the sound of footsteps coming closer to you. Bucky stood behind you and Steve, him getting an eyeful of your butt while he cleared his throat to catch his best friend's attention.

"Hey, Bucky! I didn't notice you were there. (Y/N) and I were doing some yoga, would you like to join us?"

You. Were. Mortified. You quickly stood up beside Steve and looked down at your feet, trying to avoid looking at Bucky after having your ass practically in his face.

"Uh, I kinda have to get ready for 'Girl's Night' tonight, but I think Bucky can keep you company." You nervously spoke, having your words jumble out quickly due to your inner-embarrassment. "I'll see you later, Steve!"

You bolted out of the gym as fast as your legs could go and made it up into your room without another incident. When you flopped onto your bed, you let out a loud, exhausted sigh before closing your eyes shut tightly. 'Why did I have to act like a nervous wreck? You didn't even let him talk for Christ's sake!' After beating yourself up over the little incident, you started to get ready for 'Girl's Night' with Nat and Wanda.

~~~~~~

It was two hours into 'Girl's Night' and you, Nat and Wanda had, at least, drank four glasses of Kraken Rum and about three shots of Vodka. You were more relaxed and carefree, enjoying your time with your best friends while gossiping about an episode of Criminal Minds you all saw the other day together.

"Not gonna lie, I would love to have a man like Morgan. Have you seen his muscles? And how he kicks down doors like a badass?" You gushed.

"That is true, and I fully believe Morgan and Garcia should be together. They have chemistry and look so cute!" Wanda loved her Morgan and Garcia ship.

"Eh, I like to have a super cute genius but that's just my opinion" Nat took a sip of her fruity vodka drink while shrugging her shoulders.

"Of course you would, you're with Bruce and that's a little bias, Nat." You gently shoved your red-haired friend playfully.

You and Wanda giggled like school girls when Natasha scoffed before she pointed an accusing finger at you.

"Well, says you, (Y/N)! You practically drool whenever you see Barnes."

That shut you up quickly. 'How does she know?! Play it off...'

"That's very funny Nat, but I don't know what you mean."

"Don't bullshit me, (Y/N). I've seen the way your cheeks get all pink and how your eyes are glued to him whenever he walks by. You're so smitten it's grossly cute." Then Wanda turned to you with a small smirk on her face.

"Maybe you should ask him to work out with you and Steve!"

Flashbacks of your embarrassment earlier that day made your face go pale. 'Absolutely not'. You shook your head furiously, staring at your two friends with fear. There was no way you'd have the guts to do such a thing, not after how you acted around him before. Plus, you didn't want him to look at you with disgust when he looks at you working out. You shake off all the negative thoughts before finishing off your last bits of rum.

"I think I'm going to head off to bed now, gotta wake up early tomorrow. Tony wants me to help him organize and plan a gala party to celebrate his newest project. And when I say to 'help him' I mean I'll be doing most of the work while he hides away in his lab with Bruce." You said before walking off and waving the girls goodbye.

2 weeks later...

You had most of the gala planned out. You had booked a cute catering company to organize some food dishes for everyone and even hired a group of people to decorate one of the large common rooms that would fit all the guests on Tony's guest-list. You had even bought a cute new dress to wear for the party. The party was starting that night at 7:30 and you would hopefully get everything done while having an hour and a half to spare to get ready.

When the decorating and planning finished, you quickly made your way to your room and got showered and changed. You stood in front of your mirror for quite some time, nitpicking every flaw you could see, judging your appearance because you knew how the other women at the party were going to look flawless and have every man swooping in for them. A sudden knock on your door snapped you out of your negative thoughts.

"(Y/n), you ready?" Wanda's voice called from the other side.

"Y-yeah! I'm coming now." You dashed for the door to get away from the mirror so you can't put yourself down even more. Once opening the door, Wanda linked your arm with hers, and both of you walked toward the elevator.

Telling FRIDAY which floor, you both arrived just as a few of the guests were mingling around; drinking, eating, and chatting. You glanced around, hoping to see the familiar faces of your friends, spotting Sam, Nat, and Clint near the bar where Natasha was serving the drinks. Tony was standing next to Pepper and being an absolute flirt as always while Steve and Bucky were standing near a corner with drinks in hand. Before you could make your way over to the bar, Wanda told you to wait where you were while she goes to quickly touch up her make-up, disappearing before you could say a word. You stood there awkwardly and looked around, making sure everything was going swimmingly until you felt a presence behind you. A tap on your confirmed that someone was indeed behind you.

You turned around to see a group of two slender women and three muscular men staring at you with smug and cocky smiles on their faces.

"Can we get some more drinks? And make them with a little more alcohol this time." One of the men quirked an eyebrow, waiting for you to scurry off to grab their drinks.

"I'm sorry, but I'm not part of catering. I'm-"

"You certainly look it though, I mean, you're not dressed like you're here as a guest. The dress you're wearing looks like the other catering staff." A woman spat, her eyes narrowed at you. You started to feel self-conscious about your outfit now, realizing the color-scheme looked very similar to the catering staff.

"Plus, the dress isn't that flattering for your body hun. We can practically see your muffin top and panty lines with how tight that dress is on you." The other woman commented while she leaned to the side to glance at more of your plush figure.

A stinging sensation began to appear behind your eyes, feelings of doubt, and an anxiety attack began to make themselves known. So looked away from the group and quickly made for the elevator, shooting Wanda a quick text saying you weren't feeling too well. 'How stupid of me to think I even looked good or that I could fit in at the party.' By the time the elevator doors reached your floor and the doors opened, hot tears were falling down your cheeks as you tried to furiously wipe them away with zero results. The tears kept flowing down as you began to walk down the hallway to your room; quiet footsteps barely making noise as they followed you. Just as your hand settled on the door handle, a warm hand clasped onto your shoulder gently. With a yelp, you spun around with a jump to look at your "attacker", only to find a pair of stormy blue eyes staring at your teary eyes intensely.

Bucky's eyes held hints of concern and worry, but it was hard to see because he was good at hiding his emotions, and the fact that your eyes were blurry from crying.

"You okay, (Y/n)? I saw you leave the party quickly and noticed how fast your breathing was." Bucky had to look down at you because he was so tall, or was it because you were just very short?

"I'm fine, Bucky. I just don't do well in crowded places or with so many strangers. I got a bit overwhelmed but it's fine now." You weakly smiled but he could see right through it, he always did.

"You had a panic attack after speaking to a group of people and judging by the looks they gave you while talking to them, I can only believe it wasn't a pleasant conversation." Bucky then brought both his flesh and metal hands to cup your face while he peered into your eyes more. "Tell me what happened, doll."

You sighed, you knew he wasn't going to let this go. Even though you both barely spoke to each other, he still cared for you like the both of you knew each other for years. Something about his calm voice and caring nature helped your nerves settle.

"They thought I was part of catering and asked if I could get them more drinks. I told them I wasn't catering, only for them to make snarky comments about my outfit and body. But it's fine, I'm used to having those comments made to me, I've dealt with those types of people all my life." Your hands gently held his and tried to move them away from your face but Bucky didn't budge.

"You don't believe them, right? I mean, I think the dress looks good on you. It shows off your curves and any man who doesn't get blown away is blind."

You gave a humorless laugh and shook your head at Bucky, looking down at the floor.

"You're just saying that to be nice to me, Buck. We both know girls like me don't belong in a place like this, or a party like that. You can go back to the party, I don't want to waste more of your time." You went to turn away when Bucky held your upper arms tightly.

"Not a chance, doll. I'm not a fan of crowds myself and was about to leave the party myself until I saw you run away. I'd rather spend my time with you and making sure you don't ever think that you don't belong."

You both stared at each other for a few seconds, his stare was intense with adoration and love while you stared at him in shock that he'd want to spend time with you. Before you could blink, Bucky leaned down and you felt his soft lips on yours, his arms wrapping around you and caging you into a warm and gentle embrace. Your hands rested onto his firm chest while his hands rested on your lower back, just above your butt. At first, you were in shock but then you gave in to the kiss and snaked your arms around his neck, your fingers embedded into his long hair.

The kiss was full of passion, and so much love that you didn't think it was possible. When the need for air was too much, you both separated and looked into each other's eyes once again.

"H-how? Why me? We barely know each other!"

"Because, (Y/n), I've been smitten for you since I first laid eyes on you but didn't have the guts to tell you. Steve's been a punk and trying to get me to join your work out sessions for weeks but I was too nervous to do it." Bucky's cheeks tinted red as he chuckled.

"And why's that? I was scared that if saw me working out, that you'd be grossed out by my body." You explained, chewing on your bottom lip.

"I could never be grossed out, sweetheart. I love a woman with curves and plumpness to her. I was nervous that if I watched you work out, I would try to make a move on you too fast and scare you away. I didn't want that to happen." Bucky grabbed your chin and leaned in again, his lips almost touching yours. "And you looked downright sexy in those tights, they shape your ass well."

You gasped and lightly smacked his shoulder while he smirked at you. His playfulness coming through. You made the first move this time and got onto your tippy toes to kiss him. It was quicker than the first but still held the same emotions. With so much strength you underestimated he had, Bucky lifted you up - your legs wrapped around his waist - as he opened your door and carried you over to your bedroom. Both of you watched a bunch of movies in your room; many kisses were shared before you both passed out, cuddled up under your fluffy blankets, safe in Bucky's arms. 

Right where you were meant to be all along.

[hellsenthero]

The Roommate Series | The Christmas Gift

Roommate!Bucky X Reader

This is a drabble series based on my life with my roommate.

MASTERLIST

-----

It was just before Christmas that you got a text from your roommate, Bucky.

'Hey, weird question for NO REASON'.

'What's your ring size?"

You laughed when the text came through, knowing exactly why he was asking. The two of you had been joking that you were practically a married couple living together, eating together, and shopping together. When Bucky first joked about it, you'd asked him,

If we're married, then where's my ring?

Don't worry about it. It's coming. Bucky had answered.

You thought he was full of it before, just going along with the joke. But now, you're not so sure.

You texted him back your ring size, a little smiley emoji next to it.

'Excellent, I'll do absolutely nothing with this info at all.'

You rolled your eyes at the text.

'As expected. Lol.' You texted back, but what you really meant was, sure, like I believe a word you say.

Come Christmas time, you found a bag, much bigger than what a ring would be in under your little tree. The bag was black and gold and you couldn't help but think it matched perfectly with his metal arm.

Bucky walked out of his room, dressed in loose fitted pajamas. He grabbed the bag from under the tree and sat down on the couch, beckoning you over. You happily sat by him, pulling your legs up and under you as you did so.

"For me?" You asked, nodding towards the bag.

"Of course," Bucky answered with a smile. He passed the bag to you, which was surprisingly light for the size of it. "Open it up."

With a large smile, you dug around the bag, grabbing hold of a small, black box. You eyed it for a moment before opening it up.

Inside the box sat a beautiful golden ring. A large oval gem at its center. In the low light of the morning, it glittered like fresh snow. On either side of the gem were small, triangular cut gems that pointed out in all three directions.

"You bastard," you breathed.

"I told you I'd get you a ring." Bucky answered.

"Yeah," you answered as you slipped the ring on your finger. "I guess you did."

[ace-of-gay]

Cold outside, you should stay over instead

Bucky and reader

Warnings: FLUFF, freezing weather, big snowstorm, walking home in the snowstorm, reader takes a bath and wears buckys clothes but thers no mention of any details plus bucky aint in the room ALPINE!!

No pronouns or skintone used or implied

Welcome to all body types

1,599words

Edited to the best of my ability

《~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~》

The weather over the past few months was absolutely all over the place from warm sunny days to bitter cold windy and rainy days straight back to the sunny but cold days like the shift between fall and winter was indecisive on if it wanted to happen just yet.

Having checked the weather on the news this morning, the forecast said it’d be cold but it didn’t prepare for what you would find on your walk home from work.

Bucky and you had planned to stop at the café after work to combat the cold hands you would endure on your way home like you had to this morning.

Stepping out the front door of the tower onto the frozen sidewalk, taking a look around to see snow spinning and swirling into drifts along the sides of the road, against cars and the sides of the building. Most of the shops and businesses around closed early, lights out, doors locked for the unplanned blizzard.

The streets dead of life and light beyond you and Bucky standing under the dim cast from the streetlights.

“We gotta get outta this as soon as possible or we’ll get stuck” he chuckles leading the way.

The snow being the most shallow towards the middle of the street making it the best place to walk as no one is driving anywhere in weather like this. Thick clusters of falling snow making it hard to see where you’re going, the tiny flickers of faint blue light just barely reflecting off of the snow in front of your every step.

After just a few minutes of stumbling your way following Bucky through the drifts, you slip on what you would assume to be ice under the snow, your body becoming friends with gravity’s pull, landing with an oomph and a soft thud cradled by the mostly untouched powder beneath you.

Bucky hurriedly turned around to find you sprawled on your back in the snow, helping you up and dusting the back of your sweater off the best he can, the snow melting and seeping through your layers of clothing pulling a chilled huff from you, refusing to let your body shiver no matter how cold you are so not to worry Bucky. Your huff catching his attention, “you okay, doll?” Looking back at you next to him, “yea, just clearing my throat” you shrug playing it off, with reluctance he accepts your response, taking your hand in his own, “you’re not goin down again, ya hear me?” He shakes your hand, making you laugh, “got it sarg”

Another five minutes and you’ve only seen three people outside and one of them was just outside to smoke.

A shiver finally wracking your body making you gasp, your jaw starting to chatter catching Bucky’s attention once again, stopping he removes his jacket and gloves, turning to you, “take off your sweater and take my jacket instead” he holds it out for you to take.

Putting your hands up to stop him “you’re going to get cold, I’m fine buck”

He shakes his head not taking no for an answer.

Normally he isn’t the pushy type unless one of his friends is in need of something, “please y/n, the cold doesn’t bother me, you need it more than I do, plus I’m almost home, you’ve still got a bus ride to take” with a huff and a shiver you unzip your soaked sweater slipping it off and letting Bucky help you into his, he takes your sweater, draping it over his left arm, helping you button up his big puffy canvas carhartt jacket with Sherpa lining, already warming you up a bit, he takes one of your hands and shoves one glove onto it, doing the same for the other before you got the chance to decline his offer.

“Buckyyy”, “nope, you don’t get to Bucky me, you’re not a super soldier, you’re staying warm”

Your arms dropping in defeat.

You continue until you get to Bucky’s complex, “do you want to come inside to warm up, or even stay while the storm is here?” He offers, but you decline, “ill be fine buck, besides I don’t want to be a bother, now go inside before I decide to give you your jacket back” you threaten, so with heavy reluctance he does, you continue on your walk, your phone dinging, a message from bucky, “let me know when you get on the bus”.

Shoving your phone into the pocket of the jacket, still shivering from the bitter wind and icy water against your face, luckily your bus stop is only a block away from his apartments.

Arriving, you try to look at the schedule board but the glass is frosted over, taking off your gloves, you check the online bus schedule, you’re faced with bold red letters, “ALL ROUTES CANCELED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE DUE TO SNOWSTORM “

It hadn’t even occurred to you that busses weren’t running, you hadn’t even realized there weren’t any running routes, you were to focused on getting home, Bucky’s gloves still held between your teeth, hands trembling trying to type in a message to Bucky through watering eyes, the wind circling around, stumbling from the sway of every gust, giving up on texting you resort to hitting the call button on Bucky’s contact.

With luck on your side he picks up on the second ring “hey doll, did you get to the stop in time? Are you okay?”, you pull the gloves from between your teeth, putting them in your pocket “uhm, yeah I’m okay, but I don’t know what I’m supposed to do buck, its so cold and the busses are canceled, I cant walk two miles in this weather while its still getting worse” you drone on, ranting when he interrupts you, “come to my place Hun, I’m on my way as well, ill see you yea?”

Nodding as if he could see it, the hang up dial tone telling you, you could shove the phone back into your pocket and put the gloves back on.

Crossing your arms over your body and putting your hands between your arm and torso on each side to add a little more warmth, you stumble through soft fluffy, frozen and compacted layers, the wind causing you to sway and walk in the direction it blows you can barely see in front of you.

You’re going the right way you just cant see where you are exactly, that is until you hear snow crunching coming towards you and your name being called out through the bitter Whooshing wind.

Bucky runs up to you pulling you into his chest, “lets get you inside as soon as possible, were less than a block away, I’ve got you” violent trembles wracking your body, the cold biting through the jacket now, your joints start to hurt from the barometric pressure drop, earlier it had only been an ache but now it hurts to move.

Finally you reach Bucky���s apartment, kicking your boots on the doorstep edge to loosen any remaining snow.

Inside he ushers you out of the jacket gloves and into the bathroom, plugging the tub, running it warm, but not terribly hot so not to cause you pain from temperature transition, he than leaves the room closing the door on his way out, “ill be right back with a change of clothes and a towel for you. All of such making you laugh as you still tremble.

You rid yourself of your boots and snow-soaked clothing easing into the warm water, the pain in your joints feeling instant relief.

A knock on the door and It opens just enough for him to pass the clothes and towel through setting them on the counter and leaving once more.

Once done with your bath you get out, drying off you turn on the heat lamp and getting dressed, he had left you his red henley and a pair of sweatpants, stepping out you find him in his living room, a fire in the fireplace and an old movie playing on his television.

“How are you feeling?” Sipping at a cup of a steaming liquid another set upon the coffee table, you join him, "much better", pulling a yellow blanket from the back of the couch but he stops you, “here use this one instead, that one is alpines blanket, she doesn’t even let me use it”,

“Alpine?” You question and like clockwork a gorgeous white tomcat hops up onto the cushion between you both, rubbing herself against Bucky’s side and than prances right up to you, sniffing you and without any hesitancy she lays down across your lap.

“She doesn’t even do that with Steve and he’s over here once a week, you must seem special to her”

A little while later after you’ve eaten dinner and watched a couple of movies, you had fallen asleep against his side, encapsulated in the warmth oh him, his home and alpine, it makes his heart melt.

He carefully stands up, picking you up, alpine hopping down before he lifts you all the way, one arm beneath your knees, the other under your shoulders, he takes you to his bedroom, tucking you into his bed, covering you with his blankets.

Alpine hops up curling up on your stomach above the blankets causing him to smile to himself “I’m glad you like them aswell alpine, I hope we can keep them around “ he mumbles under his breath leaving the room to sleep on the couch, it wouldn’t bother him whatsoever as long as you’re safe and happy.

《~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~》

Im finally backk, thank you all for being patient, i think i had writers block or something

[shadecrux]

Bad Day (Bucky Barnes x Reader -drabble)

----------------˚ * •̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙* ˚＊------💜 💚 💜------＊* •̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙ * ˚----------------

°•★Pairing: Bucky Barnes / Reader °•★Rating: SFW

°•★Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Established Romantic Relationship, Pet Names, Doll, But Otherwise Gender Neutral Reader °•★ Words: 669 (nice!) °•★ Notes: Hey all, so this is the first fic I’ve ever published on tumblr, pls be nice!  I finished up my own bad day today and sort of, ended up writing this drabble as a way to get out those feelings.  This is the first time I’ve written as Bucky, so I hope I’ve done him justice!!  Despite the use of pet names I tried to leave out physical descriptions of the reader as much as possible so anyone can envision themselves in that role.  If anyone has any notes for how to do it better I am definitely open to that!   ~All writing unless otherwise noted is my own. Please do not post or reupload my work to other websites without my express consent. I do not consent for my fics to be used in AI creations. I do not own any of the characters featured in my works unless they are stated to be OCs.~ All of my fanworks are intended for adults aged 18 and up only! Minors please DNI. ----------------˚ * •̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙* ˚＊------💜 💚 💜------＊* •̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙ * ˚----------------

You were curled up on the couch when he got home, eyes glistening with tears too stubborn to fall, hugging your knees to your chest. It had just been such a bad day. It seemed as though nothing was going right, and by the end of it, everything hurt.  

Bucky walked through the door and saw you, immediately dropping the bags he had been holding and rushing over to sit beside you and pull you into his arms.

  "What happened doll, what's wrong?

"You shake your head, turning your body to curl against him, burying your face in his shoulder.

  "Can't..."

"Hey, hey it's okay. You don't need'ta talk about it right now if it's too much ok? Just hang on to me, I've got you."

You nod and wrap your arms around him, sliding yourself closer to him until you're halfway in his lap. Bucky simply hums and squeezes you more tightly, his arms around you strong and steady and solid, an anchor to hold you there with him. 

 Finally, finally, the tears come, and your body is wracked with sobs as he soothes you, gently stroking your hair, and pressing his lips to the crown of your head. 

"Shh, shh... it's alright. That's it... let it out." He whispered, his breath warm against your skin.

 He didn't really speak, just murmured soft, soothing sounds into your ear, rocking with you on the couch until tears stained his shirt , until you began to still against his and he could feel the tension draining out of your shoulders. His hands gently slid up and down your back, kneading your muscles, grounding you until he finally heard you sigh, and you lifted your head to look at him.

 Seeing the large wet patch on his shirt your face twisted into a frown, and you look up at him apologetically. 

 "Bucky, I'm so sorry, your shirt..."

"Don't you worry about that sweetheart. It's just a little wet."

He reached up to cup your cheek in his hand, lifting your chin slightly until you were looking at him, his bright blue eyes piercing as they gazed into yours. 

 "How are you feeling now?"

"A little better..." 

"Well, that's a start." he leaned forward to press his forehead against yours, pausing a moment before his voice took on a lighter, more teasing tone.  "But I'm not exactly satisfied with that answer. I think we're gonna need to do a little bit better." 

"Oh really?" you asked, the barest hint of a grin tugging at your lips.

 "What did you have in mind?"

"Well, for starters..."His breath fanned your face as he tilted his head, kissing you sweetly, his lips impossibly soft as they connected with yours. Bucky kissed you slowly, hand gently cupping the base of your neck, holding without forcing. Your lips moved against his, and by the time you pulled back for air you were dizzy and lightheaded, and what's more... you were smiling.

 "How about now?" he asked with a lazy grin and just a hint of smugness in his voice.  

"Definitely better." You laughed.  

"And how about after a bath, dinner, and a movie? I'll cook tonight." He gently nudged his head against yours.

 "Right now? That sounds like a perfect night." You replied, and he didn't waste another moment, scooping you up into his arms and standing to carry you through the apartment toward the bath. 

 There would be plenty of time later to talk about the things that had gone wrong if you wanted to. For now, Bucky's only concern was making sure you were okay - he would take care of you, and give you the space to relax and recover

. By the end of the night, the two of you would be cuddled up on the couch, doubled over with laughter at some dumb movie, the hurts of the day slowly fading into the past.

 By the end of the night, when you were laying down beside him to sleep, you would still be smiling. 

[astro-rain]

delicate; b.barnes

delicate masterlist

chapter twenty-eight - “remnants of the past”

word count: 2.3k

synopsis: remnants of the reader’s past both hurt her and help her, but it opens a new door for her and bucky.

pairings: fem!reader x bucky barnes

It was quiet in her apartment, the kind of middle-of-the-night quiet that makes the air feel pleasant and calm because you can feel that the rest of the world is asleep.

Light from the city shown softly on the floor in front of the window. But it didn't make it to the couch, providing the comfort of darkness to the two sleeping there.

They had fallen asleep while talking — somehow having moved past the thing with the vodka and then the thing with her head. She would've stayed there taking all night if sleep hadn't taken them both.

Bucky fell asleep sitting up, his head leaned back and resting on the cushion behind him. She had been sitting to the side of him but on the other end of the couch. However, once both of their eyes were droopy and their voices slowed, she ended up leaning forward and laying down, with her head just a couple inches from Bucky's outer thigh.

In his sleep, (or maybe not) his hand ended up resting on her head, right past her forehead. And perhaps he woke up once or twice and allowed himself, ever so gently, to stroke the hair that lay under his palm.

But he did then fall back asleep. He wasn't aware of when she started to stir in her sleep. He didn't notice when her face began to distort into pain, anger, sadness, or some mix of the three. He didn't see her breathing pick up or her skin become clammy.

He did, however, wake the hell up when he heard the guttural gasp accompanied by the mini convulsion of the couch cushion. He turned to the sight beside him. Even though she was sitting up and facing away from him, he could see the turbulent movements of her chest that by her ragged breathing provoked.

Immediately he was scared. Not of her, of course, but for her. He's seen her upset before, but never anything like this. Never anything... like he used to do. But he needed to be calm. He needed to be solid. Just as she used to be for him.

He called out her name, making sure his voice didn't waver.

Her shoulders tensed up, startled. Her head whipped towards him. She jerked back but her erratic movements caused her to slip off the couch. Knees and shins struck the hardwood.

In a flash, Bucky stood up, but then crouched down once he saw the look on her face.

"Don't! Don't-"

"I'm sorry!" he put his hands up in front of him. Then hushed his voice. "I'm sorry. You're safe. It's safe, I swear on my life."

She looked at him with wide eyes and tear stained cheeks. He felt awful, and he wondered how she felt when she took care of him after night terrors.

"I have nothing to do with this," her voice shook, weak.

"Honey, please," he implored. "Look around. Look where you are. This is your home.”

Her eyes dared to move to the side. Then the other side. She held her arm to her chest, rubbing her wrists like they were sore, but there were no marks or bruises or anything.

"You had a nightmare," he said in the gentlest tone he could, "and you're not in any danger."

No response.

"We fell asleep on the couch," he inched closer. "That's why you didn't wake up in your room. But you're safe."

He held out his hand. "I'd never in a million years hurt you or let anything else hurt you."

She remained still but the tears kept coming. She was just staring at him, heaving and trying not to rock back and fourth.

He retracted his hand, his offer not accepted. He let it rest on the floor.

"The floor is cold. Feel it?"

It took a second but then - wordlessly, she brought her arm down and let her hand sit on the floor, mirroring his.

"It's because the heat from your skin goes into it and flows through it That's the coolness you're feeling."

He wasn't sure if that was right but he continued all the same.

"There's a reason behind everything," Bucky said. "Even what you're feeling right now."

"Your somethin'... nervous system is..." he tried his best to recall, "...really riled up because you had a nightmare. You're afraid, and your body is overreacting to that fear when it shouldn't be. That's why you're... breathin' heavy and really stressed right now."

"Sympathetic," she mumbled.

"What?"

"Sympathetic nervous system."

He smiled. "Yes! Yeah, your body is trying to fight for your life even though you're just sitting here with me. But that's the thing. You're just sittin' here. You're not in any danger. Promise. It's called the... fright... response or something."

"Fight or flight."

"Right," he smiled once more.

She stared down at the floor, at her hand, and her gaze softened. He finally let himself exhale. She seemed to be calming down.

Then she looked up to meet his gaze. He was hopeful, but let down.

As soon as her line of sight was on his face, focused, her eyes grew wide. She looked so confused but still so scared.

"I've seen you before," her voice was laced with alarm.

He froze. What do I do?

"I..." her expression distorted as the realization dawned upon her. "I know you."

She stood suddenly and took a step back.

He stood up as well. He must remain calm. "You do."

She looked bewildered. He couldn't help but feel guilty even though he knew it wasn't his fault.

"It's okay," he tried. "You're right, you do know me. So you must know that I pose no threat to you?"

She stared at him, then looked down, thinking to herself for a moment.

"Yes..."

Her eyes switched back up to him, breath still heavy, but shoulders less tense.

"I know you're confused," he stepped forward. She didn't move. "I know there's a lot that you don't know or don't remember. So, what do you remember?"

She tried to start a sentence but it dissipated into a sigh, like she couldn't find the words.

Slowly, she walked over to him. She held her arms out, palms facing up and parallel to the floor, signaling him to extend his own.

He held his hands over hers, but didn't make contact, afraid of frightening her.

Lightly, she grabbed onto his forearms and squeezed. Her hands then slid down to his hands and pinched the material of the gloves. He stood still, letting her pull the gloves off. Both of them. They dropped onto the floor with a felt plop. The two of them just stared down at this hands, one flesh, one metal. It was quiet for a moment. He didn't dare make a move. He didn't dare say a word.

She felt validated, like something was confirmed to her. Of what, she didn't know. However, she felt like all the strong feelings - the trust, the speed of her likeness of him - made sense. Like he was the right person for it. The person this affinity was supposed to go to. The person who her fondness belonged to. She didn't know where or why she knew him, but she knew he fit into the space her mind didn't seem to know how to fill. He was it.

She closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around him, letting her head rest on his chest. Quickly, he reciprocated, but remined quiet. It felt right. It felt good. It felt... missed.

Cautiously he brought his hand up to hold the back of her head. She only hugged him tighter.

"Bucky," she said into the air, more so declaring it to be true than asking a question.

Everything else still evaded her memory but that collection of letters in that order is him. That much she knew to be true.

"Yeah?" he said, half-confirming and half answering.

"You're it."

"I'm what?"

"My... person. Aren't you?"

His breath faltered. "Yes."

"I missed you. I don't know why, but... that's what I'm feeling."

"I missed you, too." So much. He still wasn't sure how much of her he had back.

"Did something happen to me?"

She wasn't of the answer, but she was sure she trusted whatever he was going to say.

"Yes. But I don't know exactly what it was."

"Me neither."

There was so much uncertainty, but not for him.

"I'm not sure, but I think someone may have hurt you," he said tentatively.

"Yeah..."

"Your nightmares... they seem really intense. Like flashbacks. I used to have the same thing... I sometimes still do."

Something about what he said struck a nerve deep in her brain, but it was so dulled she couldn't make out what it meant. It felt sort of like worry, like a need to protect. Then it left.

"I was... strapped down... or something. In this last one."

He felt sick thinking about that happening to her. But the thing her wrists earlier -- that explained it.

"Before, you said that you 'had nothing to do with this.' Do you know what that means?"

"I'm not sure exactly, it's not as clear in my head once I wake up. But... It was like I was being... hurt or something- like punished? I don't know. But... I wasn't the one who was supposed to... be hurt. If that makes sense."

A hundred different possibilities crossed his mind, many of which made him feel guilty (again).

"Do you think that was something that actually happened to you? At some point in the past."

"I'm really not sure. It felt real, though. Like I was... really in trouble."

He hated picturing what might have happened, but he couldn't stop his mind from going to the worst possibilities. Whatever did happen, he prayed that it wasn't painful. Although he supposed even if it wasn't painful then, it's painful now. For both of them.

"What do we- What do I do?" She stuttered a bit.

"How do you mean?"

"If theres all this stuff I dont remember. What do I do? Like, how do I get it back? Should I even want to get it back? What if there's trauma I'm better off without?"

"Well, I can't speak for the last five years. But, I know a good amount of things that happened before, and I think there's a lot that you would wanna remember."

A beat passes.

"How long had I known you?"

"I met you in 2016, and we knew each other for about a year and a half."

Confusion again. "I don't remember meeting you."

"I know. It's alright."

Personally, it was seared into his mind; he figured he remembered it well enough for the both of them. He reckoned he could describe it to her if she wanted him to.

"So I'm just missing a year and a half of my life and was foggy for some part of the last five years..."

He looked at her somberly. "It seems so. I'm really sorry."

She sighed. "Fuck."

He shared the sentiment.

"You know, a while ago, my memory was pretty scattered - a lot worse than yours - and the rest of my mind, too. But I was able to recover. You... actually, are the one who helped me put it all back together. You helped me with a lot of things."

She looked at him, in awe.

"I did?"

"You did. You were probably the best thing that could've happened to me."

Her expression softened. She was surprised, and almost honored, that she meant so much to someone. That someone thought so highly of her.

"Really?"

"Definitely. So maybe I might be able to help you put some of it back together. I know I'm not as smart as you, but I think I can help some. A-and I can do some of the things you did for me to help me remember."

Her brows raised just slightly, hope briefly flickering across her eyes.

"You helped me find my way back to myself, so... I guess it's only fair that I help you find your way back to yourself."

Her eyes began to well up. How could someone care so much about her? Five years of being mostly alone — it takes a toll on you.

"You'd be willing to— stick with me? To help me?"

"I couldn't not."

"You seem really sure?"

"I am," he said like it was the most basic truth. Since it was. "I don't know if you remember it or if you might feel it, but I love you. And it's unconditional. I love you and I lost you once, so I don't care if things are different now. You may not remember all of me but I know all of you. I want to stay. If you'll allow me."

"Bucky..." she said fondly. "Even when you first came here? When you were at my door?"

"Yes."

"We have this whole history and you just stay. Even though my part of the history is gone..."

"It's you," he shrugged. "You're it for me. You'll always be it. You're everything."

His words made her want to burst into tears and scream. In a good way. But also in a way that felt like something was trying to push through her chest. To make itself seen. She wanted to burst at the seams and let every secret, unknown feeling crawl out of her.

Maybe she understood what he said. Working on it. Finding her way back to herself. Maybe she could feel something within her that she wanted to discover, wanted to uncover. She found him, but thought maybe she could find her way back to him. Like she once had but didn't remember.

She stepped forward and yanked him into her arms.

"I want you to stay. I want you."

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[shreddedparchment]

Perennial Pt.16

Don’t You Want Me

05/21/2022

Pairing: Bucky x Reader          Word Count: 3,032

Warnings: language, angst, pining, jealousy, heartbreak, grief, death, stupid guys being creepy as fuck

Featured Flower: Cornflower, Hydrangea, Ranunculus

A/N: Enjoy! That’s all I’ll say for this one. xoxo

Please DO NOT repost, copy, or translate my work onto any other sites or blogs! Don’t be a dick.

It’s no secret for you that things with Bucky have been changing gradually over the last few weeks.

He’s been different and a part of you is hoping that things are about to change. Change for good. Although you don’t let yourself think it for more than just a fleeting moment, you wonder if Bucky might actually, maybe has developed feelings for you too.

Your own heart is bursting at the seams with affection for him and he’s been so nice and sweet lately that you can’t help but hope.

You wake up and quickly sleepily slip into the kitchen to start your coffee before you wander over to the bathroom. You wash your face, brush your teeth, then do your hair before moving into your closet to pick something comfortable for the late summer.

It’s slowly starting to cool off outside as fall approaches so you choose a long simple dress. It stops just past your ankles, is stretchy, with pockets and a beautiful wine red color. The capped sleeves will keep you cool but the length will shield from any breeze you might come in contact with.

You wander back into the bathroom, consider doing your makeup and decide to wait until after you’ve had breakfast.

The smell of your coffee brewing fills the tiny space of your apartment and a gentle tap on your window pulls your attention before you can make it out of your bedroom.

You move to stand by it, staring out at Paul as he leans against the glass looking forlorn and ashamed.

“I came back last night?” he asks, knowing the answer.

“What do you want, Paul?”

“Your boyfriend got pissed at me,” Paul explains.

“My…?” your brain short circuits as you remember waking up to Bucky in your bed and you can’t believe you forgot he was here last night.

You’ve been so busy the past few weeks and the day had been exhausting, after crying into his chest for a few minutes you’d passed out. He must have slipped out some time in the early hours.

Your mind floods with the scent of him, the feel of his body next to yours, and finally the bruising and closing cuts on his face.

“I’m sorry, okay? I just…I don’t know, I’ve always liked you.” Paul’s words bring you back to the present and you frown at him.

“And I’ve already told you, I’m not interested. Why does it take my boyfriend telling you to leave me alone for you to take me seriously?” you demand, feeling more anger with Paul’s harassment than pleasure at calling Bucky your boyfriend even though he’s not.

“I didn’t know you had a boyfriend,” Paul shrugs. “And an Avenger?”

You growl, turning away from the window and moving back towards the living room and kitchen.

“Fuck off, Paul.” You’re done being nice.

And actually, once the sale completely clears for the new building, you’re gonna move into that top apartment that’s been vacant for three years. Remodel the hell out of it, and make it your safe space away from the Pauls of the world.

You can hear him saying things through your window but you ignore him in favor of making your morning cup of joe. You pour ice into a tall glass and froth up your milk a little before pouring your coffee and adding all the fixings to make your favorite cup of iced goodness.

From your pocket you pull your phone and quickly find Bucky’s texts. Nothing new. Did he have meetings this morning?

You: Hey

You put the phone down and try to ignore the urge to stare at it until he responds in favor of making yourself a simple breakfast of oatmeal and fruit.

The phone buzzes.

Bucky: I’m a little busy. Meet me at that one café on 6th.

You put your spoon down and stare at the message before taking the phone up to respond.

You: I’m eating breakfast already.

Bucky: Just meet me, kid. Be a good girl.

You scoff, smirking at the gentle order.

You: You should know better than most that I am not a good girl. And I don’t take orders, dummy.

Bucky: Just get your ass down here. I’m already here.

You: Bucky! I’m literally having breakfast. I’m hungry.

Bucky: If you’re not here in the next half hour, I’m leaving.

You: Bucky!

Bucky: 29 minutes left…

“Shit,” you spit, then jump off your seat to go look for your boots. “So typical!”

You sit on the floor and pull them on, lacing them loosely and then sprint out the door. You hail a cab and hope that he can drive as fast as he looks like he can.

Whatever Bucky has planned, he better make it worth leaving your breakfast half eaten on the counter and your coffee slowly cooling.

~~~~~~~~~~

You arrive disheveled. You’re seriously a mess. Your hair isn’t done, your makeup? None. Not a stitch. You can feel the look of exhaustion on your face from the past few weeks of craziness.

You’re braced against the swinging glass door’s handle, sighing with frustration as the cool air of the shop hits you. While you definitely hadn’t run the entire way, you’re out of breath because of the small run from the cab to the shop and the utter panic you were in from being five minutes late.

Had he not waited?

You scan the small shop and don’t spot the familiar leather jacket or jeans and boots anywhere.

“He left,” you gasp, straightening up and placing your hand at the top of your stomach as you start to rifle through your purse for your phone.

Five minutes. He can’t have gone far, right?

You turn around to look out of the glass door and hope you might see him walking away or waiting somewhere, hiding, waiting to laugh at the look on your face because you actually thought he’d left.

“Looking for me?”

You whip around nearly dropping your phone as you find yourself face to face with the man you just can’t seem to get over.

“Uh…” your eyes do an involuntary sweep of him and Bucky is dressed to the nines. He’s got no leather jacket and no t-shirt underneath. Instead he’s wearing a blue button up. Not one of those stuffy and starched business shirts, but more of a casual button up, with a collar and button sleeves. He’s got the sleeves rolled up along his forearm.

His pants, instead of dark jeans, are dark gray heather that sit on his hips and waist perfectly clinging to his massive thighs but loosen as they reach his knees and calves.

He’s got his shirt tucked in and his shoes are plain black and white chucks. Despite the casual look of the outfit, it’s clear that he’s dressed to impress and you gape at him from head to toe until you meet his eyes again and notice his hair is more neatly combed and styled than it has been since you’ve known him.

“...h-hi.” Your voice is weak in surprise and because you’re still slightly out of breath. He’s still a little bruised up but it’s much less pronounced than it was yesterday. Almost healed.

He smirks at you, his steel blue eyes crinkling at the corners.

“I got us some coffee and muffins. Come on.” He reaches over and takes your purse from you which you struggle to unwind from your arm and shoulder but he pulls it away and leads you to a small table by the large windows that open to the street.

The café is somewhat busy with coffee orders to go but sitting patrons are few and it gives you two a little bit of privacy.

“You look nice,” Bucky tells you, hanging your purse on your chair as he angles himself a little more to face you.

You scoff and laugh both from nerves and because you feel like he’s teasing you.

“Yeah, right. I told you I was having breakfast. This is one of my house dresses and I didn’t get to fix my hair or put on makeup or anything,” you frown.

Bucky huffs one laugh at you, then gets up from his seat again as his name is called for his order. “You look beautiful. In anything.”

He leaves you with that, mouth open as you stare ahead at the faceless people walking by.

Did he just call you beautiful?

You reach up and try to do what you can with your hair but stop as soon as he’s setting two cups of coffee and the muffins he ordered down.

“Here, I hope I got it right. I couldn’t remember what you liked from here.” He turns your cup towards you and pushes it closer before serving you your muffin.

“Thanks,” you quickly pull your cup up and take a sip, relishing in the delicious drink–ordered just as you like–and lament the one at home waiting to be thrown out.

Bucky is already halfway done with his muffin by the time you decide to take a bite of yours.

“So, what’s up? Why did you want me to come so freaking early?” you munch as he stops to take a sip of his coffee and then he laces his fingers together, muffin abandoned, and he meets your eyes.

“I have a problem.” He says and your heart begins to race.

“O-oh?” Your heartbeat thumping in your brain drowns out all the other noises in the world.

“Yeah,” he continues, then he licks his lips and takes a deep breath. “See, I-I kinda met this girl, and I really wanted to get her one of your bouquets. You make the best flower bouquets, but you’re closed so I-I was kinda hoping that you’d come with me to the flower market and maybe we can make something up there? I know you’re not working and your cousin and all that just happened but I have a date and I could really use your help.”

“I-” you shut your eyes, urging the burning to go away. “I-I didn’t know you met someone.”

“You were gone for a while,” Bucky explains. “A lot can happen in a few weeks’ time.”

“I know. Yeah, I mean, I’m a billionaire now, right?” You laugh without humor, and can’t believe the stupid way you let your hopes go up thinking that there was any possibility that Bucky could feel the same way about you as you do about him. “So who’s the lucky girl?”

You avert your eyes, staring either out at the street and seeing nothing or down at your coffee cup, getting colder and colder as your appetite also disappears and your stomach begins to turn over.

“No one you know.” Bucky says. “Just some random girl I bumped into. One of those things you aren’t expecting to happen and then it happens.”

“Right,” you finally turn to him and give him as authentic a smile as you can while your chest caves in.

You hope he can’t see the utter pain and heartbreak on your face.

“So? How about we go get those flowers?”

“But you haven’t finished eating.” Bucky points at your nibbled muffin and your half drunk coffee.

“I’m not hungry,” you sigh and rise, taking your purse and slinging it over your shoulder. “Let’s hurry, or all the good flowers will be gone.”

“Hey,” Bucky calls but you don’t wait.

You can’t.

You have to move on. You hear him follow, but don’t turn to look at him. Looking at him is torture.

~~~~~~~~~~

The flower market is as busy as ever. Lots of people browsing, fellow shop owners stocking up, and just the general buzz of the city filling your ears. It’s easier to ignore the agonizing knife going through your heart over and over again in a crowd and amongst flowers, you lose yourself.

“So what’s she like? What flowers were you thinking?” You ask Bucky who has been walking beside you and wringing fidgeting the entire way here.

He’s probably picking up on your mood shift and is confused by it but you won’t clear it up for him. You have to get over this.

You can’t sit through loving him another moment and watch him be with someone else again.

It hurts too much.

The yearning. The wish that it were you. You can’t do it. You won’t.

You make a mental note to disappear for a few days to let all of this pent up emotion out and then when you come back into his life–because who are you kidding? You can’t actually cut him out of your life completely–you can be the friend he deserves.

You’ll listen to all his girlfriend troubles and eventually one day his wife troubles then kid troubles. By then, it won’t hurt to.

“Um,” Bucky begins, finally distracted by your question and moving to look around at the options. “I was thinking these? Buttercups, right?”

You wander over to see what he’s picked and look at the bulbous flower with admiration.

“Yeah. Persian Buttercups. Nice choice. What color?”

“Soft pink,” Bucky says immediately.

“Okay.”

You order a bushel and then continue to walk. Bucky quickly takes the flowers from you and you let him. Holding them just makes you feel…sad.

“What else?”

“Cornflowers.” Bucky again says it without hesitation. “And white hydrangeas.”

Does it seriously have to be cornflowers?

“O-okay.” You move between the sellers, bartering with them for the blooms and find some for a reasonable price. Bucky quickly takes the two small bushels from you again and you don’t fight him on it.

You lead him to a stall selling supplies to finish the bouquet. You pay for the paper and the ribbon and you even grab some Bells of Ireland to fill the bouquet. Since there’s already so much color from the white, blue, and pink flowers, the green will sit nicely against the splashes of color.

You work in silence, trying not to draw attention to yourself as you style the arrangement. The more you shift the stems however, feeling the fuzzy and smooth stems of Bucky’s choices and trying not to look too hard at the bouquet and how much you love the choices he’s made, you begin to lose your footing and you can’t keep your face as straight as you want to.

You can feel the corners of your mouth beginning to droop.

The people passing by are stopping to watch you make your arrangement and Bucky’s just behind you, watching you over your shoulder.

“That looks great,” he tells you and some of the women watching nod in agreement, voicing their appreciation for the colors mixed together.

“What ribbon?” you ask him, looking at the soft blue satin ribbon and the white lace ribbon you’d picked.

You can hear your voice barely above a whisper, already slipping towards complete collapse.

Your chest is so tight that you don’t know if you can even draw a full breath.

“Which one do you like?” Bucky asks, his voice right by your ear, soft and deep.

“Bucky…” you sigh, so close to falling to pieces.

He hears the hitch in your voice probably, that little crack that you almost hid well enough for him to overlook.

He peeks more closely at your face and you turn your head away from him as your audience seems to realize that something’s wrong and their whispers intensify.

“Hey,” he calls, your name slips past his lips and before you can crumble he turns you towards him.

You can’t exactly resist his pull. He’s strong and he could literally throw you from here to the street if he wanted to.

The bouquet held between you, you keep your eyes trained on it, unwilling to show him your eyes.

His hands trace the length of your arms from shoulders to wrists then back up and he pulls you a half step closer.

“The bouquet’s for you,” he tells you, and like the numbing sensation that comes when your headache medication finally kicks in, your chest is given full relief as your brain desperately tries to understand what he’s saying.

Your eyes water, spilling slow rolling tears as you finally look up to meet his gaze.

You’re given the briefest glance of his steel blue eyes before his lips are pressed to yours and his arm is snaking around your waist to pull you closer, crushing the bouquet between you.

Your body and brain are separate entities in this moment, one responding willingingly as the other makes desperate leaps to catch up.

Bucky is kissing you! Bucky’s bouquet is for you!

He tilts his head and deepens his kiss, extracting the bouquet from between your bodies until they can touch. His wide chest presses to yours and you can feel his metal hand, gloved as it is, wrap around the back of your neck to hold you in place as he dips you slightly.

It’s all too much all at once and your poor brain is still trying to understand.

You push against him and gasp as he brings his gloved hand to your cheek instead and steps back a little.

His face is full of yearning and his eyes are desperate and so fucking blue.

“Bucky…” you gasp, clinging to the collar of his shirt.

“God, I’ve been wanting to kiss you for weeks,” he admits and you laugh, too flabbergasted to make sense of the words coming out of his mouth.

You just accept them for now and lean your forehead against his shoulder as you try to calm your racing heart.

“I can start calling you my girlfriend now, right?” He asks, sighing heavily as he presses his lips to your head.

“Bucky…” you try again, feeling a little more stable on your feet. You pull back enough to look up at him, to meet his eyes again.

“I love you,” he whispers, just for you. “I didn’t know. And then I did. I’m sorry I made you wait so long.”

And then you’re crying again and Bucky pulls you in, hugging you close as you take his apology to heart.

[soldierswar]

Broken Mirrors - Chapter III

Bucky x Reader

Angst

Warnings: Swearing, mentions of violence

Chapter Plot: You learn more about this mysterious person with your face, along with what your role will be working alongside Bucky.

Previous and future chapters

..............................................................................................................................

 You were dizzy. In fact, you felt like you were going to throw up.

            Everything started when a man…The man who was supposedly your little doppelganger’s father, (aka Richard), joined you all in the living room seconds after you and her caught eyes with each other. 

            The name Richard really suited him. If he had asked you what you would have guessed it to be, you probably would have guessed Richard. 

            He was a tall, slim white man with silver hair and sharp facial features dressed in a grey suit looking like he had just arrived from a business meeting on Wall Street.

            When he had come into your line of vision seconds after you met eyes with the girl, he placed a hand on the girl’s shoulder from behind giving it a comforting squeeze while acknowledging you with a nod before announcing, 

            “Mia…I’d like to introduce you to your sister.”

            The girl…Mia, mouth agape looked like she had a million words to say, but couldn’t utter a single one. Her eyes carried an expression that consisted of a mixture of confusion, hurt, and even betrayal. 

Long story short, she didn’t know that she was adopted until she was 13; which you thought was pretty fucked up. You were always confident in the fact that you preferred knowing that you were being raised by your aunt and uncle never feeling the illusion that you had parents.

            When the whole subject of this little ‘family reunion’ took place, Bucky made his way in and out of the room. He didn’t really care much to be involved in things that weren’t really his business. So he made himself comfortable in the kitchen attacking the scotch housed in a pretty expensive looking decanter while sporadically but covertly listening in to see if the conversation turned into something that he was concerned with.

            Richard had told the story about what had happened after your mother died. He and his wife who were apparently good friends with your biological father wanted a child. At the same time, your aunt and uncle wanted a child to raise too. So instead of fighting over who would get the both of you, they decided that it would be best to split the two of you apart.

You held back the need to point out how corny his version of of events were. Especially considering the plethora of movies with the same plotline. 

            For you, the truth behind that decision to split the two of you up was obvious. Your uncle wanted to raise you to be the assassin that you had just finally become and be part of the legacy and bloodline that he was afraid would end with him. The last thing that you needed was the distraction of a sheltered sister that lived a normal life. Also, the last thing it would be is wise for you to even associate yourself with anyone outside of Unity. The two of you knowing each other could or would have been a huge mistake. 

A mistake that was happening now. 

            Your gaze constantly darted between Richard and Mia. But when you did, you found yourself unable to look at her for too long. It would be an understatement to say that you felt unsettled staring at a complete replica of yourself sitting exactly the same way that you were on the couch and catching herself to stop doing that annoying little nervous tick that you were guilty of doing also. You wondered if she had the same little permanent mark on her knuckle.

            “How could you not tell me that I had a fucking sister?” she croaked angrily eyes filled to the brim of unshed tears. 

Before that moment, she hadn’t spoken a word due to her holding them back the entire time he was confessing about your guys’ past.

            She then looked at you like she was waiting for you to add along to her thoughts. But what were you supposed to say? He was hiding a lot more than you or she could ever know, but you weren’t sure how much she should actually hear. You weren’t even sure how much you were even ready to hear.

            The beginnings of a sympathetic smile reached his lips. He looked like he wanted to go over and hug her, comfort her, and take every shred of hurt that she felt away. But the way that she glared at him with red eyes gave him a clear message to not go near her. You knew that look all too well. If she was anything like you on the inside she probably had something akin to murder on her mind.  

            You decided to break up the depressing moment and say what was really going on in your mind.

            “Question,” you butted in.

            “Before we continue the excuses about the lies we grew up with, how about you tell me what the fuck I’m doing here right now of all times.” 

            “Y/N…” 

            “Actually, I have a couple. One, how the fuck did you know where I live?” 

You then turned to point at Bucky who nonchalantly stood in the kitchen preoccupied with his drink and his phone.

            “And two…Why did him coming for me make way more sense than your entire presence does right now?”  

            Bucky’s eyebrows were raised and he seemed to not be nearly as bored as he had been for the past 45 minutes. 

            Richard looked over to Mia for a split second giving her a look that suggested to you that he was anxious about the undoubtedly heavy subjects that were about to take place. You had a feeling that you were also probably going to have to brace yourself. 

            “Y/N, I know about what you did. What you’ve been…raised to do,” he confessed. 

            “Yeah, no shit,” you snapped back.

“He had pictures.”

            You didn’t notice when Bucky had left the kitchen, but he was now leaning against the wall that was behind the couch only 5 feet away from you.  

            “I want to know why I’m here today of all days.” 

            “I think you’re smart enough to know the answer to that question,” Bucky answered.

            The only person in the room that seemed confused was Mia…You hoped it would stay that way for just a little bit longer. You weren’t in the mood to aggravate the poor girls’ pending aneurysm just yet. 

“Y/N, what has your uncle told you about your identity?” 

You turned to Bucky giving him a confused frown. That wasn’t a question that you were expecting.

“My…identity?” 

Richard nodded. 

What kind of an inquiry was that?

“I mean you seem to know quite a bit about it, so why don’t you attempt to tell me something that I don’t know.” 

“I mean,” he began before you interrupted. 

“Is this where you try to do some sort of intervention and try to tell me that I’m so much more than this? That I don’t need to be under my uncle’s thumb?” 

“Not quite...” 

Now you were getting annoyed. He really needed to get on with it.

“Did you know that when you search any type of records under the name Y/N, Y/L/N you get nothing?” 

Another thing that you weren’t expecting.

“What do you mean?” you questioned. 

“What I said,” he answered. 

You glared at him while flaring your nostrils.

“Well assuming you’ve tried hard enough, did you try searching through my dead father’s last name, Forbes? Who knows, maybe even my aunt’s maiden name?” 

He shook his head. 

“You could try any possibility of any type of familial ties and you can’t find a thing? Even if you search with my last name?” 

He nodded.

Weird that he even thought to do that but okay.

“So what does that mean? I don’t exist?” 

He let his silence be the answer to the question.  

There was no way that that was true. You had passports, ID’s, hell, you even had your birth certificate. 

“Y/N, how many passports do you have?”

There was no way you were giving this guy any incriminating information about yourself that he didn’t already know the answer to. 

“Four? Five?” 

The answer was 8, some of them under different names, but he got nothing from you.

“And how many of those ID’s did your uncle just bring to you?” 

All of them. 

 And when you got even the first one…did you take a photo that was supposed to be used for those documents at home?”

Yes.

Your continuous silence was enough of an answer for him.

“Y/N, other than the documents you claim to have…Do you have any real proof that to the government you exist?” 

A wave of anxiety hit you. 

He wasn’t right about this. He couldn’t be right about this. This had to be some type of mistake. 

“What’s your point?” you snapped. 

He took a nervous deep breath.

“I’m telling you this because by government record you may not exist,” he then points to Mia. 

“But she does.” 

“And why is that any of your concern?” 

Then the realization then hit you like a ton of bricks. 

Anybody that searched for you could lead to her. And this was why she was currently in this secret hideaway. 

This wasn’t necessarily about you, but it was about her. 

“Richard tested me on whether or not I could find you by your picture alone,” Bucky chimed in.

“You know, the one that I showed you? He didn’t give me any other information than you being the girl behind what happened in Atlanta and a few of the other stuff that you’ve done in the past few months. And after only hours of looking for any leads all I could find was a girl with your face who was beginning her role as a principal dancer in a ballet company, and her address.” 

Mia’s eyes widened as she seemed to be putting two and two together about what you had done. How could she not? There was no other real news emerging from Atlanta.

“The only reason Sergeant Barnes even found you was because I of course knew about you.” 

She seemed to have a second eureka moment.

“Dad is this why I was…” 

Her voice trailed off and her battle with her tears ended as a few fell down her cheeks. 

“You were what?” you responded nervously.

There was a pause between the two. 

“7 years ago when Mia was about 19, she was kidnapped.” 

19…19…19…Why did this ring alarms in your head?

“She didn’t know what was going on, but after 3 days we were able to find her and convince the people that took her that she was not the person that they were looking for.” 

19…19…19…

Ohhhh shit.

When you were 19 you were out on an assignment in Japan. Somebody that worked for the people that you were spying on tried to kidnap you in your hotel room. But before they were able to so much as lay a finger on you, you killed the guy. He was your first kill. 

“I’m guessing that because they didn’t know about the two of us it led straight to Mia first…” you murmured in revelation.

Richard nodded. 

Your heart dropped, and an intense pang of guilt came over you. All of this was happening because of you. You knew this wasn’t your fault as much as it wasn’t hers. Yet you couldn’t shake the feeling.

“Let me guess. The people that know what I did that don’t quite work for the government know what I did to the senator might be on the search for me now…And the easy target might be her if they figure out who did it.” 

“Afraid so,” Bucky confirmed.

“Who is it?” you questioned. 

“How familiar are you with Ingrid Watson?”

This caught your attention.

“You mean one of my uncle’s oldest opponents? Very.” 

Long ago, Ingrid and your uncle were very old friends. But about a decade before you were born she went rogue and did many things to spite him including turning some of Unity’s best people against them. 

You continued to keep your focus on Bucky not daring to look at Mia.

“And why are you involved?” you asked.

“Let me guess…Did they have ties to–” 

“Hydra?” he interrupted before you could say it. 

“I recognized a name and face or two.” 

This didn’t surprise you. After Hydra disbanded the ones that weren’t caught and brought to justice turned their loyalties to anyone that they thought could protect them. Some tried coming to Unity but they were swiftly refused.

“Okay, so what do you want me to do, take her out?” 

“You get one job done and you’re that cocky already?” Bucky snorted.

You shot dagger eyes at him. 

He ignored the anger and continued. 

“We need to figure out what her next move is. She’s almost certainly beyond pissed that her little project is done with and will go to whatever her plan B is after she figures out who to punish.” 

He was right. From what you had heard about her, she wasn’t one to let anything slide without consequences. It was crazy to you that he was tied to her. But if your higher ups knew about it, the hit job made sense. 

“And let me guess. You want me to work with you to get to her…But not kill her before she reaches her goal.”

“And you seem to be one of the only people that can really help us,” Bucky added.

Translation: ‘We know that if you don’t help us you could be putting your innocent estranged twin in danger, so what other choice do you have?’ 

You made a once over at everybody in the room. All of whom in a sense depended on you despite the fact that your mere existence or ironically lacktherof was putting an innocent girl in danger. And you had to do all of it behind your uncle’s back. 

You were so fucked.

…

In contrast to the escape plan that you thought that you would have had to make when you arrived at the cottage/underground bachelor pad of a sanctuary, you were allowed to go home. Or rather, Bucky was allowed to escort you home. 

Bucky made you put the mask back on for the duration of the two hour drive, but now he was letting you sit in the front seat.

After an hour of driving, Bucky broke the silence. 

“Since when are you not talkative?”  

You didn’t answer. You just let yourself continue to stare into space processing what you had just learned about your past, present, and fearing the unknown about the future. 

Bucky didn’t accept the silent treatment.

“Did you really not know that you had a twin out there?” 

Again, your only answer was silence. 

“Do you think you’re going to try to see her again?” 

You shrugged. 

“I might have to,” you murmured softly. 

“So she speaks,” he announced.

Silence again.

“Did you know that it was Ingrid that was associated with the senator?” 

You shook your head. 

“My job isn’t really to ask questions,” you answered. 

“ I was given a task, and my job was to execute it. Maybe one day I’ll be given more clearance to know more answers.” 

“And you’re not worried about doing tasks as heavy as killing somebody in broad daylight for reasons that you can’t even fully comprehend?”

You knew where he was getting at with these pressing questions. It was time to set the record straight. 

“I know that what I’m doing is good, okay?” you huffed.

“Do you?” 

“Yes!” you snapped. 

“Listen. I get why you of all people are concerned about this, but we’re just doing the right thing to try to steer what’s going on in the right way behind the shadows. To protect the world from people like Ingrid that are also working behind the shadows for the wrong reasons. We’re not trying to dominate the world and create a doomsday of sorts.”  

“Coming from someone who just killed a man who could have become the president.” 

Oh this motherfucker had nerve.

“Someone who got to the position that he was in because of the person that we’re literally trying to not so figuratively disarm,” you argued.

He sighed. 

“So what comes after?” he questioned. 

“You go back to blind loyalty to the people that literally stripped your existence into oblivion?” 

“He had a reason for what he did.”

“Oh, and what is that?” 

You crossed your arms and let yourself sink down in your seat feeling defeated.. 

“I don’t know yet…” 

He let you have another few minutes of silence before getting to the important conversation. 

He asked you about how difficult it might be for you to sneak into the files that your uncle may or may not have on everything. You went on the explain that it wouldn’t be easy. But your friend Adam had access to almost all of it. All you had to do was find a way to sneak into his house and use the methods that he had taught you himself on how to break into the system. 

You didn’t miss the look look on his face processing why you never decided to go in yourself and look. 

“I’ll join you,” he said. 

“The fuck you are,” you snorted.

“Just…Meet me at my apartment on Thursday. You obviously know how to get past my security system.”

“You can get that info you need in just two days?” he questioned. 

You flared your nostrils at him.

“How bad do you think I am at my job?” 

He put a hand up in surrender. 

“Okay. Two days,” he confirmed. 

You nodded in satisfaction.

If this car ride indicated anything, the period of time that you would have to be working with him was going to be exhausting. 

Fuck.

End of chapter notes: Hey guys, I'm so grateful for my new readers. This is def more of necessary a backstory chapter, but there are going to be a lot more fun Bucky x Y/N moments to come.

Tagged: @lethallyprotected @ryunniez

[kurogxrix]

me when the READER in the X READER has a name:

like babe the fic ate but i do NOT look like an Aurora🙁

[buckyalpine]

40s Sergeant Barnes with a nurse and a Sergeant kink (and breeding and house wife kink, virginity loss). This was supposed to be a pure smutty drabble but then I got in my feelings and added some fluff and angst but I promise Bucky is still a dirty, nasty little fuck in this. Just with a sweeter ending. The one he deserves.

Listen just imagine what a cute, sexy menace Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes would be just waking up from an injury when his eyes flutter open to the pretty nurse he’s been eyeing from the day he started. You’re not a shy, dainty little thing, nope. Not at all.

You bark out orders like a drill Sergeant and one glare from you is all it takes to get everyone in line and on task without a second thought. Even his superiors are scared of you, biting their tongue when you stitch them up and send them on their way before running off to your next patient.

Bucky was in love.

“Well aren’t you a sight for sore eyes” he rasps, throwing you a charming smirk while you roll your eyes in response, shaking your head. "How'd I get so lucky, got a my little angel tendin' to me"

“I see your injury hasn’t stopped hurt that mouth of yours Sergeant" You quirk an eyebrow while he playfully huffs as you change the dressing covering a gash on his abdomen. You swab the area clean and he doesn't flinch even though you know it must burn like hell, his muscles tensed while he continues to watch you with heart eyes. "Now you know I'm not your little angel, I got 20 other men to fix up, you better be out of this bed as soon as you're all healed up"

“C’mon sugar, you're breakin' my heart" Bucky gives you a little pout with those perfect lips and you catch the twinkle in his eye as he looks over your form with complete admiration. He loved your sassy, take no shit attitude and it's taking everything in him to calm himself down so he doesn't get a hard on right there in front of you.

"You'd tell that to a cat with three legs if it was in a nurses outfit" You try your best to not give into his flirty comments and puppy eyes, knowing damn well he's a heart breaker but he makes it so difficult when he continues to woo you with his boyish charm.

He can't help but chase after you; catching the way your eyes always dart around with anxiety when his group returns from an operation, relief flooding them when you finally spot him. He loves your indifferent attitude, patting him down to make sure he's uninjured but your furrowed brows and the tiny pout on your lips give away that you're worried.

How can he just let you go. Every time you check over him, he needs you closer.

So much closer.

-

"Ms. y/l/n, Sergeant Barnes is requesting you in his tent, he says it's urgent"

You shake your head looking over at the time, quietly making your way over to the tent he's stationed at, thankful that a number of troops were sleeping so you wouldn't be seen as you quickly slip inside.

“And what hurts now” you sass with your hands on your hips seeing the soldier in perfect health, doing your best to assess him without letting him know.

"Always checkin' over me" Bucky chuckles, seeing what you're doing; his words making your cheeks heat up, "Knew you cared about me sugar"

"Well what am I doin' here" You give him an unconvincing huff, struggling to keep your voice steady, refusing to meet his eyes, keeping your gaze on his silver dog tags instead. It doesn't help that he's handsome as hell with a light dusting of scruff covering his cheeks. Bucky's never seen you flustered before and it evokes something in him, all the blood in his body rushing south seeing your fingers twitch.

All he wanted to do was kiss you but now-

“Help your Sergeant out doll” He whispers, taking another step forward till his chest brushes against yours, his hand coming to tilt your chin up, "Will you?"

You gasp feeling his hardness press against your thigh, your heart fluttering wildly as his thumb traces your lips, any semblance of control you had slipping away feeling the warmth of his skin.

“Y-yes Sergeant Barnes”

His lips press against yours, soft and sweet, a stark contrast to the way his body was screaming for him to pick you up and toss you onto his cot.

"Sweet like sugar" He lets his hands fall to your waist, pulling you flush against his body while your arms drape on top of his shoulders. You stand on your toes chasing more of his lips and he chuckles at the needy whine you let out when he pulls away for air.

Now let's say your first night together was actually quite tame. He kisses you again and you swoon when he repeatedly checks in with you before going any further. His hand slips under your skirt, letting his fingers toy with places no on else has touched. With each night, he needs you more and more until he can't hold off any longer and neither can you.

-

You sneak into his tent and this time he doesn't hesitate to undress you completely, not when he needs you bare with nothing separating you both. You feel your heart race as he lies on top of you, draping a thin sheet over himself when you shiver at the chill night air. You feel his body heat instantly warm you up, his heavy cock resting between your soaked folds.

"Are you sure, sugar?" He asks, his hand cupping your cheek and stroking your skin.

"Please Sergeant" You whisper and the way you say his title makes his cock twitch. There's something so different about you when you're in his bed, a sweet little bunny giving herself to him completely. It drives him feral with a need to make you feel good, make you cry for his cock and his cock only, to keep you nice and full of him.

You don't look twice at anyone else and here you are completely naked in his tent with your tight little virgin cunt, your legs spread open so he can put his dick in you; there was no way he was ever going to let you go.

"You tell me if it's too much, alright?" His lips tickle your neck as kisses your skin while rubbing his heavy cock through your folds, coating it in your slick, "Breathe for me"

He slips his tags into your mouth as he starts to press in, the initial sting making you bite down hard onto the metal feeling a mix of pleasure and pain. You whine at the way he stretches you open, your thighs squeezing around his waist, nails digging into his shoulders.

"Shhh, that's it love, doin' so good for me so good for your Sergeant, look how you're takin' all of me baby" He looks down to where you're both connected as he continues to slowly push himself in till hes fully sheathed inside you. He gives you time to adjust, slipping his tags out of your lips and letting his tongue lace with yours instead, his balls already throbbing with how tightly you were squeezing his cock.

"Please-Sergeant" your heels press into his ass desperate for him to move, gasping when he starts to slowly roll his hips, barely pulling out.

"I got you love-don't worry" Bucky moves as slowly as he could not wanting to hurt you, taking just as much care of you as you had with him countless of times.

But he can only keep up at that pace for so long. Your muffled whines and moans don't help the way his mind is already spiraling. His pretty little nurse all spread out just for him, taking his raw, bare cock in her soaking pussy, squeezing him so tight, he was only a few strokes from cumming.

If it were up to him he would've proposed on the spot, thinking about making love to you on your wedding night, seeing you all shy and sweet wrapped up in soft white lace. If you were his wife, he'd take you apart every which way, not giving a fuck about traditions, taking you right on the dining room table.

You'd be the prettiest little thing for him to come home to, such a good wife all dirty just for her husband. Only he'd know the way your mouth would slobber all over his cock like your life depended on it. The way you'd moan at the taste of his cum. Bucky's eyes rolled back at the thought of you with nothing but some heels and a string of pearls he'd put around your neck while he stuffed you with cum and emptied his balls in you.

"S-Sergeant-I-oh god" You whimpered feeling his cock grow harder, your pussy pulling him right back in, feeling the coil low in your belly pull tighter and tighter as he hit that spot.

Meanwhile Bucky's jaw clenched as he felt his balls pull tight to his body, the tip leaking steadily in your pussy. His mind spiraled into places he didn't think would exist before he met you, rogue thoughts he only entertained when he had his dick in his hand. The harder he fucked you the more he thought about how gorgeous you'd look with a swollen belly.

Fuck, imagine if he got you pregnant right then and there. That nurses uniform would no longer fit you. Everyone would know he knocked you up, your perfectly round tummy carrying Sergeant James Barnes' baby, breasts heavy with milk, God, he wasn't going to last-

“Gonna let your Sergeant pump you full of cum?” He pants, letting his hands grip onto your hips like his life depends on it, the wiry hair at the base of his cock rubbing against your clit.

“Yes!!” You sob, biting down onto his shoulder to keep your cries down while he continues to fuck you into oblivion. You don't understand how such filth can spew from that pink, pouty little mouth of his. "Please-please-need-youI-I'm gonna-"

"M'yours sweet girl, m'all yours, go on, cum for me love, cum on my cock, it's all yours" He gazed into your eyes, cooing at your parted lips and sweat slicked skin. It didn't take long for you to shatter around him his lips smashing against yours to swallow your moans.

"Want your cum Sergeant" You beg , desperate to have him claim you from the inside.

"Oh fuck baby, y-you can't say that, m-gonna, oh fuckkk" Your words throw Bucky right off the edge as he lets out a deep groan stilling his hips and shooting endless ropes of his spend into you. You both lay in comfortable silence, your fingers playing with his hair; his usual kempt brown locks now disheveled .

“Y’know m’gonna marry you” his scruffy cheek nuzzles into your neck as he continues to stay deep inside you as his cock softens, “after all this is over. Gonna put a ring on that finger”

His words send a different wave of emotions over you, feeling more safe than ever, clinging onto him as tightly as possible. You let a whimper slip out and he pulls away from your neck with an expression of concern.

“What is it love” Bucky coos, wiping away the tears that slip you, stroking your cheek while you bite back a sniffle.

“Do you mean it? After this is all over?” You weren't sure what Bucky would want-there was still a war going on. Anything could happen. Perhaps this was just to keep his bed warm. Something to keep him calm, you were just someone to-

"Of course sugar" Bucky presses a firm kiss to your forehead, silencing the thoughts that tried to run wild. "You're mine"

-

And of course he gets his happy ending. Because when it's all over, he gets the ring for the girl he loves. He's on one knee, proposing to you with the sweetest words. He treats you like a princess on your wedding night, making love all night long until the sun is up.

There isn't a surface in the house he's left untouched. Nothing makes him more feral than moaning for his pretty wife, constantly taking her hand and wrapping it around his cock, watching that diamond glint with each stroke.

It doesn't take long for you to feel a little squeamish, knowing all the tell tale signs.

The day you tell him he's going to be a dad is one of the happiest days of his life. There isn't a single night that goes by where he isn't nuzzling his face into your tummy, talking to your little one.

Everything was perfecttt.

[welldonebeca]

Glitter and Goo (II)

Summary: When you have to go on a mission to a different planet together, Bucky is hit by a mating ritual flower, and some feelings you two have been hiding come up. AKA: It’s a sex pollen fic with a side of breeding kink. WC: 1.8k words Warnings: Romantic tension. Fluff. Dirty talking. Sex promises.

If you like my work, consider buying me a coffee or subscribing to my Patreon. It’s just $2 a month and I promise you won’t regret it.

Masterlist

You fixed yourself dinner, lemonade forgotten, barely processing the taste of the food as you watched the way in front of you.

Space was beautiful. It was so strange to see those stars so clearly.

Yet, it was so scary sometimes.

You got something ready for Bucky too, saving it for when he'd wake up, putting some music on before moving off to work on the research of the element already.

It was maybe two or three hours later that the sound of a phone call got your attention.

"FRIDAY, pick up," you asked.

The sound stopped for a moment, and you took your gloves off.

"Doctor Sparkles," Tony greeted. "Got time to talk?"

You scoffed at the silly nickname.

"What's up?"

"That sparkly thing you sent over," he told you. "Thor said it's pollen."

You rolled your eyes.

"No shit, Sherlock," you shifted to the other side, where you'd been working on the pollen. "I gave it a look under the microscope, but I'm not exactly good at alien biology."

It just looked sparkly. Sparkly pollen, that was it.

"Anything on the goo?" you asked him. "It dried really fast, I didn't have time to take a second sample to look into it myself."

Maybe you could cut some of the fabric of Bucky's clothes. Even if it had dried, it could have left something there.

"We got someone smart looking into the one too," he told you. "Are they from the same plant?"

"Yep," you crossed your arms. "A flower exploded on Bucky. He got really grumpy about it."

There was silence on the other side.

"It exploded?" Tony asked. "Like... what?"

You rolled your eyes.

"Like a flower explosion, Tony," you told him. "What else can it mean?"

More silence.

"I gotta check something," he decided. "Are you going anywhere?"

"Yeah, I was thinking about visiting Pluto," you sassed back. "I heard it is really pretty this time of the year."

A sound caught your attention for a moment, and you looked in the direction of the dorm.

Had Bucky woken up.

"It's not worth it," Tony told you. "I'll be back in a minute."

He hung up, leaving you to scoff. It wasn't like you had anything else to do, anyway.

"Ma'am?" FRIDAY called. "Agent Barnes is behaving strangely."

That made you stiffen up.

What?

"Define strangely?"

The damn pollen.

You pulled up a tranquillizer from the side of your table.

If it had made him violent, it was best not to even get close to him.

"He has broken his bed, ma'am," the system told you. "And... I believe he's trying to copulate with your pillow."

He was...

"What?" you shouted back. "What do you mean, he's trying-"

But another call came through again.

"It's Tony, ma'am," it told you.

You grunted, covering your face with a hand.

"Pick it up," you cocked the tranquilliser. "Tony, tell me you have good news, because I think I have a problem."

"I do," he told you. "And it isn't venomous."

You sighed. Good, at least that.

"The flower that Bucky might have encountered is part of the mating rituals of-"

"Quick answer," you interrupted him, worry already filling you. "I don't have time for the sociology lesson."

He snorted a bit.

"It's a sex flower," he told you. "It makes you horny for your mate and facilitate reproduction of a highly infertile-"

You blinked, shocked.

"Wait, it's a sex pollen?" you asked. "Tony, this isn't funny!"

Where had he gotten that explanation from? Someone's fanfiction story?!

But he laughed on the other side.

"Except that it is!" he corrected you. "It enhances romantic and sexual attraction towards one's mate-"

"Mate?"

Was he talking about animals?

"It is actually highly sought after by some Asgardians struggling with their fertility," Thor spoke on the other side. "It quickens up the production of eggs and sperm to ensure reproduction."

You had to pinch yourself to react, still shocked.

What the fuck?

"And how does that affect humans?" you asked.

You were met by a bit of a hum.

"We don't have many answers on that," Tony answered at last. "But probably the same as Asgardians?"

"If so, there's nothing to worry about," Thor assured you, not sounding worried at all. "It only hits those who are actively around their partners."

You glanced back at the dorm. Well, that didn't sound very right.

"Partners?" you asked. "Like boyfriends and girlfriends? Wives, husbands, spouses...?"

He confirmed with a hum.

"Yeah. People who we have strong romantic and sexual feelings for, a bit more than just passion," he told you. "Bucky will be just fine."

"Ma'am," FRIDAY called. "Agent Barnes has dented the wall with a punch. I believe the door can only resist another five of those before breaking, unless you activate quarantine mode."

That didn't seem to go over Tony.

"Wait, what?" he asked. "Why is he punching the ship?"

You stood up quickly.

"I gotta go check on him," you decided. "Thor, is there a chance he... might..."

Hurt you.

His voice was tainted with worry when he answered.

"Violence is unlikely," he told you. "Unless you try to keep someone away from their mate."

You exhaled slowly, trying to calm your racing heart.

Holy shit.

"Okay," you spoke slowly. "I'll call you back if I need anything else."

"Wait, what?" Tony gasped back. "Where are you going?"

But you pressed the screen near your station, hanging up.

You could hear grunts when you walked near the dorm and jumped in shock when you heard Bucky's fist against the door again.

"James!" you shouted. "What are you doing?"

He stopped.

"Y/N?" Bucky called suddenly, half whimpering. "Where are you?"

You neared the closed door.

"How are you feeling?" you asked, instead. "Are you alright?"

He knocked on the door, a little weaker.

"Please," Bucky begged. "I need you."

You swallowed down, eyeing the door, worried.

Was he going mad with lust?

"Please," he cried.

Heat pooled in your belly, a soft smell making your face warm.

Was that him?

He smelt so good.

"Please?" Bucky insisted.

You stopped your tranquilliser slowly, walking near the door, but when you tried to open it, it was locked.

"FRIDAY," you called. "Open the door."

There was a moment of hesitance.

"Are you sure, doctor?" the system asked. "It's still possible to put Agent Barnes in quarantine. It's only 36 hours until we arrive back home."

You shook your head. No, you wouldn't leave him alone.

"Open the door," you commanded once more. "Don't ask me again."

The sound of the locks moving was loud, and you opened the door slowly when you found it unlocked.

James didn't move when you stepped inside, just far enough from the door that you walked in easily.

His face was so flushed, and he was drenched in sweat.

You reached for him slowly, touching him gently on his cheeks, and he exhaled, looking at you with pleading eyes.

"Where were you?" Bucky panted, sounding so sweet and yet so needy, his hands moving to cover yours. "Where had you gone?"

It broke your heard to hear him like that, so lost. You had left alone!

He watched you with his bright blue eyes so soft, and it was as if he hadn't been slamming the door moments ago.

"I'm sorry," you caressed his skin. "I was making dinner. Aren't you hungry?"

Bucky shook his head, hand moving down slowly, touching your body gently. First your waist, wrapping his arm around you so slowly that you knew you could step away and stop him any time you wanted.

He put his head in your neck, sniffing you, nuzzling into you as if you were the most precious thing he didn't want to let go.

You shivered when you felt him sniffing you, pressing close to you, his body hot.

His big hand travelled down a bit, near your hip.

"Hungry," he mumbled into your neck, licking your skin.

Bucky's fingers searched around your jumpsuit on your back, tugging on your jacket and your utility belt.

"Smell good," he whimpered. "Can smell you..."

You sighed out.

"Smell me?" you squirmed.

You could smell him good. It was so good.

"Smell you wet," Bucky hissed, unhooking your belt and throwing it away. “Smell your skin… wanna bury my head in your tits, find your sweet smell in them.”

You gasped, surprised.

"Bucky! Something could break!"

He tugged on your vest, lips travelling up and down your neck, and if he was that insistent there, you couldn't help imagining what he'd do if he put himself between your legs.

"Want to break you," he took his hands to your belly and pulling on the clasps of your best, nearly breaking them. "Make you mine. No one else will have you."

What?

He wasn't speaking any tense.

Bucky threw it away, grabbing the front zip of your suit and tearing it.

“Bucky!”

Did he know how hard it was to get a jumpsuit that fit your tits? They were too fucking big for most of them, you had to get a bigger size and adjust the rest of your body!

Still, you couldn’t complain as his big hand pushed into your clothes, grabbing your chest, squeezing your breast over your bra.

"No one else can have you," Bucky babbled. "You're mine."

Bucky took your clothes off so quickly you barely saw it, and he picked you up, laying you on the bed.

For a moment, you thought he would take you just like that, but he took off his clothes before moving and kneeling in front of the bed, looking at your face with such a soft pleading look on his face.

"Please?" he whispered. "Can I have you? Please?"

You swallowed down, leaning onto your elbows.

His mattress was practically on the floor, the legs broken, and it would be so easy for him to just crawl to you.

"Want to give you my babies," Bucky pleaded with you. "Want to be yours, please."

You swallowed down, breathing in deep. Oh, how good he smelt. You had to fight yourself not to bury your face into his neck and sniff him.

The flower... it had to do with mating rituals, wasn't it?

"What are you going to do?" you asked him.

Bucky swallowed down.

"I want to make you feel good," he promised. "I'll treasure you, I'll never let you go."

You pressed your thighs together, a bit warm between them.

His fingers clenched by his sides.

"I'll fill you up," Bucky promised. "You're so empty, aren't you? I'll give you everything!"

You swallowed down again, feeling your pussy clenching at the idea.

His babies. He was going to give you his babies, right?

Your eyes travelled down his body to his cock, and it was so hard. There was so much precum.

Oh, he was going to fill you up, right?! Give you his cum!

Bucky was going to breed you.

You nodded, sitting up.

"Please," you tried to grab his hand. "Please, Bucky."

…

“Glitter and Goo” was first posted on my Patreon on April 2023. To read it now, subscribe to my page, it’s just $2 a month and I post 6x a week.

. . .

Forever Tags: @emoryhemsworth​​ @amythyststorm33​​ @shaelyn102 @yknott81​​ ​​@maximofftrash​​ @kgbrenner​​ @thefridgeismybestie @magpiegirl80​ @mogaruke ​ @shadowhunter7​​ @musicalcoffeebean @megasimpleplan4ever​​ @deemoriarty​​ @05spn18​​ @malindacath @kdcollinsauthor​​ @random-fandom-fangirl2112​​ @widowsfics @frozenhuntress67​​ @averyrogers83​​ @notyourtypicalrose @nerdypinupcrystal @giruvega Marvel forever tags: @its-daydreamer23​​ @random-fandom-fangirl2112 @tayrae515imagines @indecisiondecisions? @afanofmanystuffs​​? @patzammit​​? @thevanishedillusion? @widowsfics​​? @alexisshoto ​​ @dreams-of-feysand ​@dragonqueen0606 @izbelross @isabelle-faith

Glitter and Goo: @art2emily

[hellsenthero]

Image: Single Dad Bucky

Can you picture single dad Bucky? I dreamt of him last night.

He wore a backward baseball cap with his dark locks of hair curling around the edges of it. He held onto the stroller with a tight grip, his baby girl all snuggled up inside. Bucky was a nervous wreck. He wasn't meant to be a father, and certainly not a single one, but he did his best. Nothing mattered now other than his girls health, happiness and safety.

Before Bucky would cruise through the world, not caring about much. Now? A loud bang of a car back firing? His hand was shooting to the stroller, ready to grab his baby girl and go. People wanted to hold her? No fucking way. Crowded, germ filled areas? You wouldn't find him within a hundred feet of it. He had fears now. So many tangible, real, very possible fears that consumed him.

You saw all this. Fatherhood had softened his gaze and turned his fight or flight instincts up to a hundred. His baby girl was a precious gift and you loved her. You loved both of them.

You certainly fell in love first. Bucky's mind was always on his baby and not necessarily on the others he spent time with. But you got through that mental bearier of his, slowly but surely his thoughts and heart grew to be all about BOTH of his girls.

Your first date was at a small cafe that lasted as long as the babies nap did. (It wasn't very long.) But you both knew you wanted to see more of each other afterward.

Once Bucky realised his feelings for you and how deep they went, he brought you over. Not just anyone can walk through his front door. Not when he has his baby girl to protect. But you, you're the exception.

After a while, you're not walking into Bucky's house, but your house. Your home.

Bucky stopped being just a single dad. He became a more. He became a husband.

And he became the happiest man alive.

Masterlist

[bethsvrse]

me, a writer, at 3am: WHAT? I CANT FIND THE SPECIFIC FANFIC THAT I MADE UP IN MY MIND WITH A WHOLE PLOT AND ORIGINAL CHARACTERS??? WHO DO THEY THINK THEY ARE??? DO THEY EXPECT ME TO WRITE THE STORY I THOUGHT UP OF???

[mrsbarnesblog]

firewood

masterlist ko-fi ao3

Lumberjack! Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: When you decide to chop wood in your backyard, your hot neighbor, who happens to be a lumberjack, offers you some help.

Word count: 4.8K

Warnings: +18❗️smut, hot neighbor bucky is a fucking warning, kinda size kink, rough sex, protected sex, dirty talk, pet names

Author's note: this is one of my favorite works, so I hope everyone who hasn't read it before will like it too (it's hard to not fall for lumberjack Bucky, tbh🤷‍♀️)

“Hey, do you need help?” You stopped what you were doing. You breathed heavily, your arms ached, and you were already sweating. The man, your neighbor, whom you already saw a few times when you arrived home, was standing before you with his hands in his jeans pockets. 

He was attractive. Really handsome. Probably 6 feet tall, with broad shoulders and visibly a lot of muscles under the clothes. Yeah, that red henley left nothing for your imagination. His dark hair was put in a low bun, and he had a little stubble on his face. But you mostly noticed his bright blue eyes, which looked straight at you very attentively.

“Sorry, what?” You said as you wiped sweat from your forehead with the sleeve of your shirt. 

“I asked if you needed help. Sorry, but it seems like you have some troubles.” He smiled at you almost shyly, and you couldn’t even make yourself mad at his words. 

“Um, It’s my first time doing it.” You awkwardly smiled back, finally putting a big ax to the ground. “But I need wood for my fireplace, so I have to work with what I have.”

“I see… but don’t you have a boyfriend or a husband? I mean, it’s not really easy to do for a woman, and you seem pretty... petite for this?” It almost sounded like a question. “I wanted to say that I can help you if you allow me, because that thing might be really dangerous if you don’t know how to work with it, and I'm a lumberjack, so... it’s not a problem for me.” He awkwardly started to rub his neck. “I’m Bucky, by the way.”

“For a woman?” You playfully arched an eyebrow. “So you think that only men can do this?” You saw how his eyes widened, and you tried to hold your laughter.

“No, no! That’s not what I meant!” He lifted both hands in the air. “It’s just gonna take you forever to do, and as I said before, It’s not the safest work. And since this is my job, I could’ve helped you. As a neighbor, you know?” 

“Relax, I’m just joking.” You softly smiled at him. “Nice to finally meet you. I’m Y/N.” You reached out your hand. Bucky’s face relaxed, but then his lips curled into a mischievous smile.

“I like you.” He said, as he shook your hand. His grip was tight, and you felt that he really did a lot of physical work with his hands.

“Oh… thanks?” 

“Soo, do you need help?” He asked again.

“Um, honestly, I don’t know. I can’t just let you work for me for free. Can I pay you?”

“Doll, I have enough money, and I don’t need yours. I don’t think that you need tons of firewood, so it would be easy work for me.”

“Okay, but maybe I can give you food? Pastry? I really love to cook, and everyone said that I’m good at it.” You nervously played with your sleeve while Bucky was staring directly at you.

“Deal. I would honestly die for homemade food, ‘cause last time I ate it was at my ma’s and I really miss it. But you don’t have to do this, okay?”

“And you don’t have to help me.” You shot back.

Bucky’s smile grew wider, and he started shaking his head. “You have some temper, doll... Friday is okay?” 

“Yeah, totally, any time you’re free.” 

“Deal. I should probably go, and you better start training to cook food for me. I am really picky, and you insisted on paying me with it.” He said and started to walk back.

“Oh, shut up.” You laughed. “I know what I’m doing; don’t underestimate me!” 

“Fine. See ya, doll.” Bucky waved at you with the biggest smile on his face and finally walked away.

Well, it’s gonna be interesting. 

For the next almost two months, Bucky had been “working” for you, and you paid him with your food every single time because you couldn’t leave that man starving after he just got home from work and then willingly helped you. 

You two got closer. Bucky was a really good man; you found out it while you were sitting in your backyard looking at how his muscles were moving with every swing of the ax. He was right that it wasn't a big deal for him—the job that you would’ve been doing for several hours he did in twenty or thirty minutes. 

The conversation with Bucky was easy, he was a pretty reserved person, but he still told you everything about his job and his friends and asked you things about your life. It was hard not to fall for him. Especially when he gave you this boyish smile every time it was time to say goodbye or when you brought him your homemade food. 

Usually he comes to your house every Friday after work around 6 p.m., but today it was already 8 and he still didn’t show up. There was no light in his windows either, so you became really worried that something serious had happened. 

You were nervously sitting on the bar stool in your kitchen while your dinner was getting cold on the stove. You really had no appetite. What if he got injured from his dangerous work? Or maybe you were just overreacting and he went on a date with someone? You really had no reason to be worried that much because Bucky probably didn’t even think of you as a close friend, and you were just a too dramatic person with attachment issues. 

The light knock on the door scared you a little bit, but you still jumped out of your seat to open it. 

Bucky was standing there, visually perfectly fine and without any injuries, and you sighed with relief. 

“Bucky, oh my god, hi. Are you okay? I was really worried about you, and I don’t even have your phone number to text or call.” You mumbled as your eyes studied his face. 

“Hey, doll.” Bucky softly smiled at you, but it was obvious that he wasn’t really in the mood. “I’m fine. Just a shitty day at work. My boss went fucking crazy over nothing, and it was just a mess.” He ran a hand through his long hair. “But I have to do your firewood, so I'll go change and be back in a few minutes, ‘kay?”

He started to go back, but you caught him by his wrist. “No, Buck, wait. You don’t have to do it right now, really. I have enough wood, and you’re really exhausted. Come in; I have fresh lasagna and chocolate muffins.” 

“Um—are you sure? I mean, you don’t have to.” He mumbled. You noticed that you were still holding his wrist, but decided to leave it that way. 

“Don’t worry, I have enough food, and you look like you really need it. C’mon, don’t you want to eat something homemade and still hot after a bad day at work?” You gave him your best smile, and it was obvious in his eyes that he already agreed to your idea. 

“Okay, we can do that. Honestly, I feel like I’m able to eat a fucking elephant.” 

You both shared a laugh before you almost dragged him into your house and closed the door. Only at that moment did you realize that even though you gave Bucky a lot of food, he had never been at your place before. For some reason, you felt really excited to feed him and spend some time together. 

“Sit here while I’m heating the food.” Bucky obediently took a seat, looking with a soft smile at how you were moving around in your little kitchen.

You looked so domestic and soft in the warm yellow lights of the room in the cute pink cotton dress with little flowers all over it. The concentration was written all over your face as you tried to perfectly set plates and cutlery on the table and then put steaming lasagna on it.

“Fuck, it smells so good; you’re going to kill me, doll.” He wasn’t able to handle the amazing smell of food right in front of him. 

Your cheeks heated, and you waved your hand at him. “It’s just lasagna, Buck; don’t be dramatic.” You took a place near him, and you both started to eat your food. 

“I’m not being dramatic. I already told you that, besides my ma, you have the best food in the world. I could’ve eaten it three times a day for the rest of my life and not gotten tired of it.” He took another big bite, moaning as the taste filled his mouth. 

“You’re making me blush. No one ever told me this.”

“That’s my intention, doll. What, none of your boyfriends complemented your skills? Because I would’ve put the ring on that finger way too fast.” You looked at each other for a few seconds until you noticed that he had already finished his portion. 

“Do you want more?” Ignoring his previous words, you stood up and took his plate to give him some extra food. The dress gently flew around your thighs, drawing Bucky’s attention to your legs when you turned around. “Anyway, what happened at work? You mentioned your boss.”

“Ugh, Pierce is a fucking dipshit. Everyone there hates him, but he has too much money, so we can’t do anything. Me and Steve have really been on bad terms with him since the first day. He tries to tell us how to do our work, but his head is so far up in his ass that he can’t even listen to what we say.” You returned to your place and put a plate in front of Bucky again. The frown took place on his face while he was talking about Pierce, so you put a hand on top of his without even thinking. 

“He sounds like a total asshole. I’m sorry that you guys have to work for him.” Bucky’s face softened at your action. He flipped his hand so he could interlace your fingers, and you felt the warm feeling all over your body. 

You both definitely felt something, but you still stayed silent, enjoying the connection. It was obvious that you had feelings for each other. It was just hard to admit out loud, and, honestly, Bucky was so scared that you might think that he did all of this just to get into your pants. Which is not true. Well, he doesn’t mind, but it’s not his only intention. He wants to treat you right and ask you out on a date. 

Back then, he felt so bold and offered to help you with the firewood with the hope of getting to know you better. Steve and Sam obviously knew about his new “work” and teased him about it all day long. Unfortunately, he still didn’t find the right moment to ask you out. Those times when he came to you on Friday evenings and you were watching him work in your cute dresses or little pajamas were Bucky’s favorites. You looked so soft, cozy, and domestic that he wished to see you like this every day. 

After the last piece of a chocolate muffin disappeared in Bucky’s mouth and he let out a moan of satisfaction, he sat in your kitchen with closed eyes and a smile on his face. 

“If I had to have a shitty day just to get this type of meal at the end of the day, I’m ready for it.”

“Bucky!” You laughed at his dramatic words. “You don’t have to have a bad day. I can feed you just because.” 

“Well, you said it yourself. Now you won’t get rid of me.” You both laughed. Then he suddenly got up and started to put plates in the sink. “You sit, and I’ll wash the dishes.”

“No, Bucky, that’s not how it works!” You got up and caught him by his bicep. Really hard and big bicep. 

“Yes, it is. You’re cooking, then I’m cleaning.” He tried to get away from your grip to turn on the water, but you only held him stronger, now with both of your hands on his arms. 

“Bucky.” When he was standing so close to you, you realized your size and height difference, and it made you shiver. You turned your head up to look him in the eyes. “You are my guest; you shouldn’t do this.”

“My mother taught me to always help women because they are not our maids.” He stepped a little bit closer. “But if you’re saying this only because you want me to leave, I can do that.”

You were both looking at each other, and what you saw in his eyes made you weak in the knees. 

“No, no, I don’t want you to leave.” Your hands moved higher and fell on the sides of his neck. It was everything Bucky needed to finally kiss you.

Two large and rough hands took your face to bring your lips closer to Bucky’s height. He was gentle yet so passionate, and he slowly moved his lips against yours. It was mind-blowing how desperately you wanted him to devour you, to destroy you. While your hands were discovering his broad chest and shoulders, you felt that your body was suddenly lifted in the air and then placed on the kitchen counter.

Now that Bucky didn’t have to lean over to your height, it was easier to kiss you properly. His tongue brushed over your lips to ask for entrance, which you happily gave. Bucky felt too addicted to your taste, your smell, and the feeling of your smaller body against him. It drove him crazy.

“I've wanted to do that since the day I looked at you.” The hands on your hips tightened and moved you closer to his body. “You look so pretty, God.” Bucky’s eyes are running all over your face, trying to memorize every little thing.

“Bucky...” You dragged him closer again, desperate to connect your lips. His large hands wandered all over your body, slightly pulling up your dress and then moving higher and cupping your breasts in them. “I thought you were tired.” His large erection was obvious through his jeans, and you wanted to tease him. 

“I’m never tired for you, doll.” He mumbled against your lips. “I could’ve fucked you right on this table, but I’ll leave it for the next time. Where’s your bedroom?” You didn’t miss the promise to fuck you again, and your body felt ecstatic just because of this thought.

“Up the stairs, second door from the right.” 

Bucky didn’t say a word before your world suddenly moved, and you ended up hanging from his shoulder. Your bare ass was probably right near his face, and you couldn’t help but blush. 

He stormed up the stairs with one hand on your thigh, as if your weight on his shoulder was nothing, and then walked into your main bedroom. 

You were thrown onto your bed, and Bucky stayed in front of you for a few seconds to remember this picture. Swollen lips, eyes full of need, a short dress that pulled up and showed a glimpsing of your white underwear. Yes, you were perfect, and only for him. 

“Come here, Buck.” You raised your hands in his direction, and he obediently climbed on top of you with a smirk on his face.

He sat between your legs, moving his hands up and down the soft skin of your thighs.

“Such a pretty doll for me, in this cute lil’ dress, mm?” His body was hovering over you, and when he found a zipper on the back of your dress, you ended up lying under him only in your white lingerie set in less than a minute. 

The pair of the most beautiful blue eyes devoured your naked body as soon as the piece of clothing was removed, and you had never seen a man look at you this way. Like you were the most beautiful, delicious, and priceless thing in the world. Bucky’s hands gently touched your body from the shoulders to your legs, and you swear that you heard a moan while he was doing it.

“Sweetheart.” He mumbled and leaned to gently kiss the soft skin of your belly, moving with little kisses higher until he reached your lips. “You’re killing me, you know that?” 

“Shut up and kiss me, Barnes.” It was impossible to think straight when his pretty face was right in front of you and his muscular body pushed you deeper into the mattress of your bed. He kissed you as you asked, but it didn’t last long before he pulled away with a grin on his face. You gently brushed his brown locks out of his face and tucked them behind his ears.

“So bossy, dollface... Do I have to fuck this attitude out of you?”

“Mmm, undress, and we’ll see what you are capable of.” You shot back at him, and he just moved away with a smirk on his face. 

In a few seconds, a red henley was thrown somewhere on the floor, and you were face to face with a body that was probably made by the Greek gods. Muscles on muscles, with tanned skin and freckles from the work under the sun. Now you wanted to climb him like a fucking tree.

“Like what you see?” His smirk became wider as he saw the look on your face: slightly parted lips and darkened eyes that were looking at him up and down. Bucky's hands went straight to the belt of his pants, and with the last movement, he was standing in your almost dark bedroom completely naked. 

You almost choked on your saliva when he pulled down his pants and boxers at the same time. He was thick and long, with an angry red head. 

“No way this is gonna fit me…”

“It will, doll. I’ll take care of it. I bet this pretty little pussy will just suck me in.” 

It was over for you. You knew that. A handsome, respectful man with a perfect body and dirty mouth? Yes, he can do whatever he wants with you.

He returned to your bed, sitting in between your spread legs. He didn’t waste any more time when he reached behind your back and unbuttoned your bra. Bucky stood on his knees so perfectly that his dick landed on your covered pussy, and it made you both moan out loud. 

“Look at this, doll. ‘M gonna destroy her.” His hips slightly moved, and because your panties were soaking wet, it was so smooth and perfect. “Can you imagine that? I will stretch you out so well that I’ll ruin any other men for you. Make you–and her– mine.” He reached with one of his hands to your tits and squeezed your nipple between his fingers, while the other one was keeping your legs apart so he would be able to move his hips. 

You tried to close your legs by instinct. The tip of his cock again and again brushed right on your clit, and the slight pain from your nipple made you desperately moan and clench your bedsheets.

“Are you going to cum, pretty girl? Im not even inside of you, and you’re already a fucking mess.” Bucky’s rough voice was so sexy that it made you even wetter, if that was possible. He saw that you were close: by the way your breathing changed and how your eyes rolled back in your head. “C'mon, just let it go. Soak those panties even more.” His movements on your most sensitive parts of the body didn’t stop, and it threw you over the edge.

You were squeezing around nothing, and the most inappropriate and dirty moan escaped your mouth. It was something that you'd never experienced before, and it was so intense that you needed some time to get over it.

“Good girl.” Bucky grabbed your face and connected your lips, giving you another wet and sloppy kiss. 

Then, without hesitation, Bucky’s hands took off the last piece of your clothing, leaving you completely naked for his hungry eyes. He stared at your body up and down for a few seconds and then closed his eyes to take a deep breath and calm himself down. 

“Bucky, please, I need you so much.” You almost cried, trying to grab him and put his body on top of yours, but Bucky was much larger than you, so it was almost impossible.

Bucky finally calmed down a little bit, and he interlaced his right hand with your left, pinning it above your head. His body softly landed on you, and skin-to-skin contact sent shivers down your spine. He was now looking you right in the eyes, and judging by his facial expressions, he either wanted to fuck you lifeless or cuddle and hold you closely.

“Tell me if it’s too much, okay?” Bucky’s soft side came out again, and you slightly nodded, giving him permission to continue. The little silver square appeared in his hand out of nowhere before he ripped the package with his teeth and put a condom on. 

You honestly tried to hold back the little bit of disappointment you felt when he decided to use protection. It was smart. You weren’t longtime partners, it was a question of your safety. But the tiny voice in your head told you that you would’ve let him fuck you without it. To feel his perfect d–

Your thoughts were cut off with a deep chuckle. “You look like you’re sad that I put on a condom, doll.” You swear that his eyes darkened when you stayed silent. “If you want it later, I’ll fuck you raw, ‘kay? But now neither of us can think straight.” 

“Are you a perfect man?” You laughed.

“I don’t know, let’s find out.” Your smile faded as soon as you felt the head of his dick at your entrance.

You were still sensitive from your previous orgasm, so when Bucky started teasing you again, rubbing you up and down to cover himself in your slick, you nearly lost it. 

“Bucky, please.” You whine, grabbing the side of his torso with your free hand. “Don’t tease me, please, I can’t—” 

Your words died as Bucky finally pushed inside of you. Your head fell deeper into your soft bed, and Bucky’s body tensed on top of you, trying to hold back a deep moan. 

It was overwhelming. He stretched you out so deliciously that you felt pain and inexplicable pleasure. No one ever made you feel this way—like you were on cloud nine and the man on top of you didn’t even actually fuck you yet. 

“You’re squeezing me so hard that I might cum like a teenager—fuck!” He groaned, squeezing your hand harder. “Relax, baby, I’ll take care of you.”

You tried to relax as much as you could with a dick buried deep inside of you, and Bucky was finally able to move.

Well, if it felt good earlier, then the first movement of his hips probably sent you right to heaven. Bucky cupped your face with his left hand, locking your eyes together, when he started thrusting at a slow pace. 

“So pretty for me, doll. You feel my cock in your stomach, huh?” Bucky’s lips almost touched yours when he talked, but it felt like he was too far away from you. “Good girl, take me so well. Knew that this pussy would be my death.” 

“More... harder, please, fuck me harder.” You spoke in between moans, gazing intently at Bucky's pretty face.

He started fucking you harder. Your bed was slamming your wall, but it didn’t bother you as much as the fact that he was hitting your G-spot with every thrust. You were a fucking whining mess under him, with a slightly open mouth and a drunk-looking face.

“Suck it like a good girl you are.” His thumb slipped into your mouth, and you moaned, doing as he said. “Your pussy is already sucking the shit out of me. Are you going to cum, baby? Going to make a mess on my cock while I fuck you? Imagine if I fucked you raw and filled you up with my load. I bet you’d like that.” The finger went deeper into your mouth, making you gag. You nodded your head as much as you could at Bucky’s words because you were already ready to cum.

“Give it to me, baby.” Bucky growled, sucking on your neck. His hips slammed into yours, making the nastiest noise, but it turned you on even more. A finger slipped out of your mouth, and Bucky’s face was in front of you again. “Fuuuck, I’m gonna cum.”

“M-m, B-bucky! Don't stop, pl– ahhh!” The wave of the best orgasm of your fucking life washed over you. You swear the stars started dancing behind your closed eyes as you endlessly squeezed Bucky’s cock and his body.

The way you were moaning, how your eyes rolled back, and how your whole body trembled pushed Bucky over the edge. A few last movements in your soaking wet pussy and he came, feeling almost lifeless, as if you had sucked the whole energy out of him.

He let go of your hand, which this whole time he held above your head, and cupped your face with both of his hands, kissing away the tears you didn’t even notice.

“Y/N? Baby? Are you okay?” He whispered and moved your head a little bit so your eyes were directed at him. You looked like you were high or really drunk, but he couldn’t argue with the fact that you were the prettiest woman on earth.

“I– it’s like I don't feel my body anymore.” You lazily mumbled and closed your eyes. “No one ever fucked me like this.” 

“Glad to hear that, doll.” Bucky leaned closer and kissed your soft lips with more delicacy and tenderness. “Do you need anything? Food, water, bath?”

“No… Can you just hug me and stay here for the night?” You asked, now afraid that he would leave since he got what he wanted.

“Sure, just let me get rid of this thing, and I’ll still get you some water.” He kissed you on the forehead before carefully untangling his body from yours. You hissed at the new empty and a little bit aching feeling inside of you. “I’m sorry, baby.” 

Bucky threw a condom in the basket under your table and, putting on only his boxers, came down to the kitchen to get you a bottle of water. But when he came back, he saw that you had already fallen asleep.

You looked so cute—still naked, with a peaceful expression on your face, laying in the middle of your messy bed. He thought about whether he should disturb your sleep or not, but you asked him to stay, right? Bucky hesitated for a few seconds, but then came closer to you, placed the bottle on the nightstand, and carefully scooped you into his hands, pushing away the covers. He put you back down, and then you opened your eyes. 

“C’mere…” You mumbled, still sleepy, and grabbed his hand.

Bucky quietly chuckled and got under the cover, hugging you from the back. You happily sighed before drifting back to sleep. Bucky kissed you in the hair, hugged you harder, and fell to sleep with you in his arms.

You woke up a little bit disoriented, trying to figure out what happened last night. 

The bed beside you was empty, but the aching feeling between your legs proved that it wasn’t a dream. You, in fact, fucked your hot lumberjack neighbor. But where did he go?

You found some random oversized t-shirt and walked down the stairs. Everything was silent; your kitchen was empty but crystal clean. Did Bucky just leave? 

Wait a minute. 

Yesterday there was a mess from your cooking and dinner with Bucky.

Now the room was almost shining. 

You looked around in confusion until you noticed a piece of paper on the table. 

All of your bad thoughts disappeared as soon as you read it, and you felt butterflies go crazy in your stomach.

[astro-rain]

delicate; b.barnes

delicate masterlist

chapter twenty-seven - “lucky guess”

word count: 3.2k

synopsis: vodka brings about some changes and some pain. do feelings transcend memories?

pairings: bucky barnes x fem!reader

She startled herself awake, clammy chest and limbs sticking to her comforter. Her whole body was damp. Her chest, heaving. Jesus Christ. Her heart felt like it was just below her skin, rather than guarded behind a cage of bone.

To her dismay, the nightmares have been flaring up recently. Sometimes she didn't remember them, and just woke up scared or upset. But other times she did remember — parts at least.

Something happened high up in the government... the president or someone, she couldn't recall. The government and all order had collapsed and everything fell into chaos. In the dream, she was running through the street - towards something or away from something, she wasn't sure. Maybe both. But then the street wasn't the street, and it was a sort of open grass land. What she remembered most was the fear. And the toll on her body; her lungs burned in the dream.

She sat up and wiped the leftover tears from her face. God, waking up from these were so taxing, both on her body and her mind. With these nightmares, her body was having a fight or flight response of an animal being hunted while laying completely still. It was like waking up from a panic attack in her sleep. Or waking up from an emotional intensity equivalent to a breakdown. She's woken up from immense sadness, and occasionally anger. But mostly fear.

She also didn't talk to anyone about it - anyone professional, that is. Yes, she was a professional. Yes, she knew exactly what she would say to a patient experiencing the same things as her. However, she had become increasingly isolated during the past few years. And everything in her head was so much. It was a lot, and it felt safer inside her head. It felt like it was secure, like the cap on a bottle was screwed on and all the carbonation inside wasn't going to explode, bubble out, and make a mess.

She knew it was ironic, but that didn't change her lack of action on the matter.

A bit after waking up and calming herself down from the nightmare, she noticed an ache in the back of her head that was growing stronger. The head pain had been at a minimum lately. She wondered why it might be returning. She didn't have any injury, and she had been sleeping fine. She slept in pretty late, but it was only last night she was up late... talking to James. James. His image in her head provoked a smile in spite of her unpleasant awakening.

She thought he might actually be the most attractive person she had ever seen. Everything about him was... perfect - his face, his body... She remembered on the "date" that wasn't actually a date, she couldn't look at him for too long without worrying that her face was going to heat up.

In addition to that was this weird wanting she had. When she woke up, she wanted to talk to him about the nightmare; wanted to confide in him. Obviously, she thought it odd considering she only recently met him. But, that didn't make it go away.

She had kind of settled into aloneness and a lack of relationship with anyone. She was lonely and she didn't try to pretend that she wasn't. She thought she had gotten used to it, accepted it, but... damn. She might reconsider.

—

Bucky woke up feeling quite rested. Until his brain turned on and he had a single thought. Falling asleep to her voice made him realize how much he missed it. And it was cosmically wrong that he didn't wake up with her.

He was so frustrated. It was supposed to be okay now! She had to leave Wakanda and it was horrible. Then he had to fight against Thanos and it was horrible. Then he disappeared.

Even though he knew it was years for her while it was only a second for him, the years had passed. He was back now. They could be together and not have to worry about the other stuff. He really thought the hard part was over. Technically they're together now but... it's like 'the other stuff' never even happened. Like their history didn't exist.

He laid in his bed, sulking. They were back in each others lives now, but under conditions he never even considered. He knew she didn't remember him, but the rest of her was still there. It is right to love her even though she doesn't love him? Would it be wrong to try to get her to fall in love with him again? Lots of things crossed his mind.

He felt like he waited so long to finally see her again but she's waited five years. He couldn't even imagine it. Five years without her. Alone. The thought made him miss her. Would it be weird if he showed up at her apartment again?

Would it be weird if he sat her down and explained every detail of them that she didn't remember. Would it be weird if he grabbed her hands and pleaded: It's me, it's Bucky. Don't you remember? Please remember. He just wanted her back so bad. It was almost tormenting - the way she was right in front of him but still somehow not. It was she was on the other side of a glass door; she was there but he couldn't get to her.

This, of course, was coupled with insecurity and worry. Sure, she loved him once, but does that mean she could love him again? If she didn't, would that just confirm all the bad things he thought of himself? What if he actually wasn't capable of being loved? What if this time around, she was scared of the Winter Soldier. The thought of her being afraid of him almost gave him chest pain.

He was also dying to, but also terrified of, finding out what happened to her during the blip. Five years is a long time, and a lot could have happened. He didn't know if he wanted to find out who or what stole her mind from her. He didn't know if he could handle finding out that the same things that happened to him - happened to her too.

He stressed himself out and there was only person he wanted to talk to, one person he sought comfort in. He told himself that he was going to give her space for a couple days so she didn't think he was overbearing.

—

"Hello?"

"Hey."

He exhaled at the sound of her voice. My girl.

"Haven't heard from you in a couple days. How are you?" he asked.

"I'm alright... Um, I was feeling a bit lonely, though. Would you wanna meet up later?"

I wanna spend the rest of my life with you and then some, he thought but didn't say.

"Yeah, of course! I'd love to," he actually said.

She could hear the smile in his voice and it made her smile.

"Oh, great. You can come over here and we could get dinner - like, takeout or something - and just relax or watch something. Nothing crazy. I think I have some wine, too."

Sounds a little like a date but he was not going to question it.

"Yeah, that sounds amazing. Yeah. I'll be there."

"Okay," she grinned. "I'll see you later."

And so later came.

She was a mix of nervous and excited. She hadn't had anyone in her house for a while, but he wasn't just anyone.

The knock on the door startled her, as it wasn't accustomed to guests waiting to be let in. She scurried over and opened it.

Immediately his face lit up. "Hey!"

"Hi," she smiled. Jesus Christ, he looked so good. Like, so good. "Thanks for picking up the food by the way."

"Yeah, yeah. Of course. You look..." he glanced down and back up to get the whole picture, "really great."

With a bashful grin, she looked away.

"I'm not super dressed up, but," she laughed, returning eye contact, "thank you."

He could only smile at her. "Of course."

She realized that they were just standing still in her doorway, but his eyes. She wanted a closer look at them.

"Um- come in! Come in," she moved out of the way. "Make yourself comfortable, please."

He walked in and set a couple bags on her table. He pulled out a bottle.

"I got this, too," he held up a bottle of vodka. "More as a gift, I guess, but if you want to drink it tonight we can do that."

"Is that Belvedere?" she asked. "That's my favorite!"

"Oh, wow," he grinned. "Lucky guess, I guess."

It wasn't lucky. He remembered her telling him that when they were back in Wakanda. He was hoping it might spike a memory or two.

"Well, thank you. Here, I'll put it in the fridge so it's cooled if we decide to have some."

He held out the bottle for her to take. She tried to ignore how big his arm was... and the fact that he was still wearing gloves inside.

She took the bottle. "Still got your gloves on?"

"Oh..." he looked down at his hands. "Yeah. I have some... circulation issues."

"Ohhh," she closed the fridge. "That makes sense. You run cold?"

More like he runs hot. The serum makes his metabolism insane. She used to make jokes about it because when they'd sleep together he would heat up the whole bed.

"Yeah. Cold hands."

He didn't like lying to her, but he wasn't sure what the alternative was. He tried not to feel bad about it since they were little lies. He was just trying not to poke a hole in her reality. He knows how disorienting that can be.

But they ate and talked and everything was fine. Actually, Bucky was having a great time. He didn't wait as long as five years, but he missed her over the time he did wait. Missed just talking to her. Though he wished he could touch her, even just grab her hand. He wouldn't dare let himself think about the other stuff.

"You know what? I'm feeling crazy," she declared. "I'm gonna try some of the Belvedere. Do you want some?"

"Well I can't let you drink alone."

"I'm bad influencing you," she joked, opening the fridge.

She unscrewed the cap and went to smell the vodka before pouring it into the glasses. Immediately she put the bottle down and took a step back.

Bucky noticed the abruptness.

"You alright?" he questioned from the table.

"I just got really nauseous all of the sudden."

Nauseous along with a horrific feeling that just manifested in her brain with no warning. Her chest felt heavy. Where did this come from?

"Oh. Are you- Do you think you're gonna..."

"I might. I don't know. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, it's alright," he stood up. "Do you need anything? Water or something?"

"No, just give it a minute. I think it might go away."

"Okay," he said, meekly.

He just stood, a couple feet from her, feeling useless. He wanted to comfort her or help her or do something.

While she was trying to breathe through it, the dull ache that had been only a little sore during the day started bursting through her skull. Her hands snapped up to grip her head.

Bucky's stomach dropped. Instantly he was at her side.

"Y/N?! Y/N, what happened?!"

She squinted her eyes shut and shook her head.

"Idunno," she spit out, too distracted by her head to give a better answer.

With the pain blaring, she dropped onto her knees, one hand on the back of her head, the other planted on the floor to steady herself. Without hesitation, he was on his knees right next to her. He rubbed his hand on her back, a feeble attempt to soothe her.

"What can I do?" he implored, desperate for anything that would make her feel better.

She couldn't reply. Tears prickled at her eyes and the fell out despite her opposition to cry in front of someone she wasn't close to.

"Oh, honey," he said under his breath, helpless.

He took off one of his gloves and placed his hand on top of hers, above the floor tile.

Then it stopped.

She inhaled then exhaled slowly and deeply, reveling in the lack of pain. Her other hand fell from the back of her head as her breathing slowed, and settled on the floor next to the other. Then she realized.

She turned but wasn't prepared for her face to be inches from his. His eyes, this close. His everything this close. Her breath halted as his eyes bore into her. He looked... scared, and that brought her guilt.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"No, no, no," the un-gloved hand extended to hold the side of her face. "Please don't be sorry."

Almost reflexively, she reached up and held his wrist. She just stared at him. His worried expression made her worried. For him.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

The words didn't work. She just nodded. But then her eyes betrayed her and glanced down at his lips. Almost compulsively, like she didn't even know it was going to happen until it did. She brought them quickly back up, hoping he didn't notice and confused as to how she let herself do that.

His expression changed ever so subtly — to something quizzical. Like he was trying to figure something out.

"I'm sorry if I freaked you out," she said.

"No, if anything I should be apologizing because I brought the vodka. I'm real sorry if it... kinda triggered this. I never woulda wanted that."

"I don't even know how the vodka could. I like it and I never had a bad experience with it in college or anything that would give me taste aversion."

He wondered if something happened with the vodka that she didn't remember but her senses did.

"Whether the vodka was the cause or not, I'm sorry that happened. But I'm glad you're alright."

"Are you?"

So worried about him. She didn't know why. Just the frightened expression on his face ignited this strangely powerful feeling within her.

"Yes!" he leaned forward just a bit to emphasize his words. "I'm totally fine, please don't feel bad. I was worried but not 'freaked out.' I promise."

She smiled modestly, re-establishing her hold on his arm and finding herself very much enjoying the feeling of his skin.

Almost in response to her re-grip of his arm, Bucky adjusted his hand placement on the side of her head, making sure his thumb gently grazed over the skin behind her ear.

On her face grew a tiny little smile.

Bucky remembered she used to love when he held her face in his hands. Such a delicate gesture. She only really let him do it in soft, intimate moments.

With no conscious control of her own body, she leaned forward. Only about half a centimeter. There was a little delay, but then he did the same. And then a little more, and a little more. And then she was kissing who she declared to be the most attractive man she had ever seen and was actively trying not to moan while doing it.

Her fingers softly curled at the nape of his neck, and her palm pressed up against his chest, feeling his heartbeat. His hand moved from cupping the side of her face to firmly grasping the back of her head. Earlier she was nauseous, but now she was dizzy. She felt like she was melting.

Bucky wasn't much better. Finally he got to touch her, got to feel her, got to hold her. It felt like stepping into warm sunlight after months in the frigidity of a shadow. He moved his lips as if to pull from her every inch of sorrow and grief and heartache and say I'm sorry. Sorry for all the things that happened to you when I wasn't here. For any hand that has hurt you, for any hands that weren't mine.

Both of her hands migrated to holding the back of his head where it met the base of his neck. She held on tight, trying pull him closer if that was even possible. She wasn't sure why she felt such a sense of urgency.

They pulled away for a brief moment to catch their breath.

"Bucky," she exhaled before pressing into him once more.

With a jolt, he pulled away, a bewildered expression materializing on his face.

"What?" she asked. "What's wrong?"

"You-..."

About a million and one things ran through his mind.

"Did I do something? I'm sorry-"

"No! No, it's okay. You just... you said Bucky..."

"Oh. I'm sorry, is that... not okay?"

"No, it's good. It's more than good, I just-... Where did that come from?"

She thought about it for a second but really didn't have an answer. Her confusion morphed into  what looked like distress. Like, where did that come from?

"I don't know..."

The more she thought about it the more her demeanor changed. She seemed nervous, almost alarmed now.

He grabbed both of her hands. "It's alright. It's okay. I'm sorry I said anything. Don't worry about it."

She looked at him, tense. Why did I say that? I didn't even think it, it just came out.

"I..." she huffed. "I'm confused."

He squeezed her hands. "It's okay."

I know how you feel, he wanted to say.

"I don't know what's happening to me."

He was almost mad. At whom he didn't know. Whoever was responsible for the way her mind was shaken up like his. The way her memories were stolen and the way she had the same lost look on her face that he recognized in himself.

"What do you mean?"

"I've been having so many issues lately and I don't know why. That thing that just happened with my head, it's happened before and it's been happening. And my nightmares. And I don't even know what that reaction was with the vodka. I feel like I'm going crazy."

He hoped in the deepest parts of him that whatever her nightmares were weren't the way his used to be.

"You're definitely not crazy. I know that at least."

She just nodded, clearly not convinced of his sentiment.

"That is your name, though?"

"What?"

"Bucky. It's your name?"

"It is. How did you know?"

"I don't know. I just look at you now and that's what I see. That's what comes up in my brain. I just feels like it makes sense. Maybe a lucky guess."

Damn right it was lucky. But it definitely was not a guess. He didn't ask what else might come up in her brain when she looks at him, too afraid there might not be anything else.

But there was hope. She knew his name! That had to count for something. Maybe he had to try to draw things out of her, make some memories resurface. She once helped him get out of his own head. Perhaps he could do the same.

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