#burdened by guilt and loneliness | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

assriels · 5 months

Text

take me to church

pairing: azriel x f!reader

summary: azriel was not a religious male, but you were his goddess incarnate and he would willingly worship at your feet until his dying breath

word count: 3.8k

warnings: smut (18+!! mdni pls), canon typical religious imagery, allusions to azriel’s work but nothing explicit

a/n: my hozier era has returned i fear

masterlist

banners by @/cafekitsune !

Azriel was not a particularly religious male, offering his acknowledgement to the Mother oftentimes in the heat of battle, on the brink of death as a curse on his lips, hoping someone somewhere would heed his plea to live another day. Whatever religious underpinnings existed within him were but remnants from ancient tradition, built into his body as steadily as his bones. But, aside from the rare moments he’d faced Death and lived, Azriel was not one to offer daily prayers of thanks.

Since meeting you decades ago however, Azriel had considered more and more changing his relative indifference to the celestial beings that reigned. He was sure he hadn’t done anything in his lifetime to deserve you as a lover — let alone a mate — but still the Mother blessed him, and for that he was more grateful than words or prayers could ever express.

Every brush of your lips against his skin, every tender gaze and soft smile was enough to bring Azriel to his knees every night before the altar between your legs. He sang praises and hymns until his jaw was sore, desperate to pull those seraphic moans from the depths of your throat as he worshiped you ceaselessly. He pledged his life to you the moment the bond snapped for him, never having been able to imagine an existence without you by his side.

Azriel had assumed that he was condemned to a life of desolation and loneliness, rotting with guilt and insecurity for all the things he had done and all the things he could never be. But despite the blood that perpetually stained his scarred hands and the weight of his past burdening his shoulders, you never shied away. Never so much as frowned when he confessed to you the serpentine nature of his hidden work for the Night Court or the calamity he’d endured as a young, lost child.

You had sat and listened all those years ago, delicate fingers tracing the calluses on his palm as if the lines on his hands whispered all of the things he left unsaid. You’d understood the complexities of his character, loved them as much as you loved every other part of him.

You made your unwavering affection for him known at every possible opportunity, often massaging away the crease between his brows when you knew he was losing himself to the spiral of his unwanted thoughts. You’d kiss his forehead and run your fingers through his hair, silent but understanding as you allowed him time to open himself up to you in whatever manner he pleased.

Azriel’s adoration of you was no different. He cherished the way you confided in him, revealing to him the depths of your own darkness and fears. He would safeguard your trust with his dying breath, always and forever striving to be your safe space, a lockbox where you could store your darkest thoughts and insecurities without fear of judgment.

Just as you had always done for him. Just as you were doing now.

In the comfort of your shared bedroom in your private residence, you wrapped your arms around his waist from behind, rolling on to your toes to kiss the back of his neck while he undid the intricate laces and buckles of his leathers. Your deft fingers soon joined his in the process as you both worked in comfortable silence to unfasten the tediously complex web of clasps.

The tension in his shoulders and the microscopic ruffle in his brow was all you needed to conclude that his latest task was a gruesome one. One of those missions that tended to stick around, following him and taunting him until his guilt festered and spread.

“Do you want to talk about it?” You asked, voice steady as you removed the last of his Siphons secured tightly around his bicep. It was an effort not to gawk at his exquisite physique that lay hidden beneath the constricting leathers; no matter how many times you’d seen Azriel shirtless, you didn’t think you’d ever get used to the sight.

He hummed in response, taking a moment to survey his torso in the mirror for any cuts or bruises that needed tending to. When he didn’t spot any — most of them had quickly stitched themselves together on the flight back home — he met your gaze in the mirror and shook his head gently, “Not really.”

Azriel was somewhat avoidant by nature, too used to minimizing his feelings in lieu of the success of a mission, but the gentle definitiveness in his tone told you all you needed to know. He’d open up about this latest operation when he was ready, but he needed time to process and think, formulate coherent thoughts about what had transpired. And as much as you wanted to soothe the emotional aches and pains you knew plagued him after every mission, you would give him that time.

You sighed and came to stand in front of him, taking both his cheeks in your hands as you forced his gaze to yours. It took everything in him not to lose himself in those pretty eyes of yours.

Azriel could sense the worry you habitually hid in the moments after he returned home, and so he leaned into your touch, turning to kiss the heart of your palm before offering you reassurances, “I’m okay. Promise.”

Azriel held his pinky out cutely and you chuckled, shaking your head fondly before wrapping your own around his. You used your joined hands as leverage to pull him down to slot your lips over his. Azriel sighed contentedly at the pressure of your kiss, his long lashes fluttering shut as his hands repositioned themselves around your body.

One hand splayed steadily on the cage of your ribs as the other made the devious trek down, grabbing a handful of your ass to squeeze playfully.

You yelped and pulled away as he smirked at you fondly. His gaze traveled over your shoulder to look in the mirror, never tiring of how the curves of your body looked pressed against his.

The two of you stayed like that for a long while, Azriel’s chin hooked over your head as your arms wound themselves comfortably around his waist. The cadence of his heartbeat was one you were well acquainted with, like a steady metronome that measured itself to the beat of your own heart.

When he pressed his lips to the crown of your head, you murmured, “Want to take a bath?”

You felt the near imperceptible quickening of his pulse against your ear and you pressed yourself further into his chest, reveling in the way he so instinctively reacted to every little thing you did.

“Only if you join me,” he responded cheekily, corners of his lips twitching in affectionate jest.

You hummed and pretended to think about it, shifting to rest your chin against his heart, pretty lashes fluttering as you looked up at him.

“I could be convinced.”

Gods, how beautiful you looked. How beautiful you always looked. Your charming allure caught Azriel off guard every single time you merely breathed in his direction, and he briefly wondered if he’d ever get used to the ease in which you enchanted him without even meaning to.

Unable to resist, his hands came up to cradle your jaw, supporting your neck as he bent down to kiss you, his nose brushing affectionately against yours as he pulled away.

“I’ll carry you,” he offered, lips brushing your skin, hazel eyes never once leaving yours.

“Deal,” you said, laughing delightedly when he lifted you, throwing you playfully over his shoulder to make a beeline to the bathroom.

Running a bath — a normally automatic part of Azriel’s routine — was made infinitely harder when he was so busy pressing his lips to your jaw, your cheeks, your mouth. He wasn’t sure what had gotten into him tonight — maybe it was the adrenaline from a hard task completed, the warmth of home coaxing him to let go and savor you — but he wasn’t complaining. And neither were you, if the way you matched his fervor was anything to go by.

When both of you finally settled into the warm water, he sighed in contentment, lazily, adoringly watching as the tension eased out of your shoulders.

Before you came into his life, Azriel had never really understood the desire to worship. He knew logically that it was an act of devotion, but never did he really feel the inclination to pray to a god in thanks.

But it was moments like these — the wonderfully mundane moments of bliss with you — that finally made him understand. If the Mother was anything like you, it wasn’t difficult for Azriel to fathom a devotee’s need to pray.

He thought this as he ran his soapy hands gingerly over your body, as he buried his fingers in your hair to massage your scalp. If you were his goddess, then these were his acts of reverence and he would practice until his physical body no longer could.

And when you did the same for him, when you gently scrubbed his back and wings and arms and chest with the deliberation and gentility of an artist with a craft, he thought that maybe this gratification was what the gods felt when their followers prayed.

After a while, once the soap had run down the drain and the water was warm and clear again, you settled against him with your back pressed to his chest.

It was in that moment he realized the arousal that had slowly eked its way into his bloodstream; he had been too busy basking in the feel of your fingertips on his aching muscles to realize that your lovingly innocent touch had made him hard. Embarrassingly so.

“Sorry,” he mumbled sheepishly, his attention now on the way his cock pressed so tightly against your lower back.

Your laugh — melodic and lovely — curled around his ears in a lover’s embrace, “Don’t be sorry. I’m irresistible, I know.”

He knew you’d meant to tease, but he couldn’t help but agree; if he didn’t know any better, he would’ve thought that you’d casted a spell on him to ensnare his unyielding devotion to you. Your head fell back onto his shoulder and you captured his chin in your fingers to tilt his lips towards yours.

This kiss, unlike the ones you two had shared earlier in the night, was much more insistent, revving your desire with each stroke of his tongue.

His hands remained frustratingly chaste on the curve of your waist, and you squirmed in his embrace, willing him to touch you. The pressure of him against your back and the feel of his mouth — now leaving a scathing trail of little bites down your neck — pressed to your skin left the space between your legs slick with a wetness unattributable to the warm bath water.

Your hand settled over his and for a brief moment your mind flickered to appreciation of the ridges raised by the scars that wound themselves like vines up his fingers to his wrists. Azriel had always been somewhat self conscious of the puckered skin of his hands, but you stood firm in the belief that they only served to make him that much more wonderful.

(And you couldn’t deny the pleasurable sensation they added when his fingers were buried inside you. But that was neither here nor there.)

You guided his touch as he reared back up to kiss you again. You led one of his hands down between your legs and the other to your chest, where he eagerly played with the peak of your nipples.

“Oh?” he intoned, amusement coloring his inquiry at the feel of how wet he now realized you were.

“Sorry,” you muttered, mimicking his earlier apology with much less sheepishness.

“Don’t be sorry,” he mimed back to you. His hands fell into a practiced rhythm, circling your clit with delicious pressure.

You arched into his touch, moans falling from your lips as he teased your entrance before he mercifully sank a single digit into you. The stretch was a welcome feeling, but it quickly dissolved into the need for more. But it seemed that Azriel was in no hurry, languidly alternating between lazy strokes and nonchalant circles.

You arched again, silently pleading with him to give you more as you gripped his knee beneath the now tepid water. Though the heat of your body alone was probably enough to re-warm the bath.

Azriel indulged you, unable to resist your alluring pull. He added another finger to his ministrations, blissfully dizzy with the sounds falling from your lips. His other hand snaked from your nipples down between your legs, timing his well placed caresses of your clit to the unrelenting plunge of his fingers.

He knew you were close — so quick, he thought with a lethal satisfaction — by the octave of your moans and the desperate way your hands fought for purchase on his legs, your breasts.

He bit down on that wonderfully tender spot at the junction between your shoulder and neck, and shivered when he felt you clench around his fingers, walls pulsing temptingly around his fingers as you came.

Azriel captured your lips with his own once more, prolonging the pleasure from your release for as long as possible. You shifted to straddle him, never once breaking the kiss as the water sloshed dangerously close to the lip of the tub.

The way you ground your hips down onto his had him groaning, eyebrows furrowing with the effort to restrain himself. He could take you now, could give in to your attempts to guide him inside you, but you were shivering, goosebumps raising the skin on your back and shoulders as the chilled water and even chillier night air caressed your form.

Besides, his mind was working in overdrive, crafting plan after plan to have you keening and arching for him, all of which required a more comfortable setting than the marble bathtub in your bathroom.

He stood with ease, looping your legs around his midsection to carry you back to the bed.

He tossed you softly — though quite unceremoniously — onto the bed, and you would have complained about getting the sheets wet, but 1) you knew Azriel would make an obscene joke about how they’d get wet anyway and 2) the feel of his cock grinding against your clit was enough to rob your consciousness of any coherent thought.

Azriel was murmuring sweet endearments into your damp skin as he made the excruciatingly slow trek down your body, his lips mapping a tedious trail of kisses down your torso as if he were committing each ridge and valley to memory in fear that he’d lose his way on the journey back.

Finally, finally his mouth found that wonderfully sweet spot between your legs and he licked a broad stripe up the length of you. You shivered as he lingered, tongue lazily alternating between teasingly shallow strokes inside you to wide circles around your clit.

It was torture of the purest kind that he wasn’t giving you exactly what he knew you wanted, and by the wicked glint in his darkened hazel eyes, you could tell he was being intentional. Your fingers found their home in the impossibly silky and slightly damp strands of his hair as you attempted to pull his mouth tighter against you, petulant pout curving your lips downward.

His responding chuckle was enough to make you groan, the reverberation vibrating against your cunt before settling tantalizingly in your bones. Azriel’s arms came up to encircle your legs, effectively keeping you from grinding your hips up. You tossed your head back and keened, giving in to the languidness of his affections.

Your eyes met his at the sound of a purposely lewd smack of his lips against you, and you felt him smirk against you before you were swiftly flipped over.

“Azriel!”

What was meant to be a gasp of surprise quickly devolved into a moan of pleasure by the time the last syllable of his name left your lips. You were acutely aware of the sudden switch in positions as you were now straddling your mate’s head.

He coaxed your gaze down to his with a featherlight touch down your spine, and you were met with a swirling mix of love, lust, and adoration swimming in pools of hazel. Your chest swelled momentarily and you probably would’ve said something sweet and much more coherent than what left your mouth as he pulled you down onto him and feasted.

Azriel was addicted to the way he could make you fall apart, even from beneath you with your knees straddling his head. It was borderline sinful – an angel brought to the precipice of obscenity and seduction.

His hips shifted on the bed, body desperate to find friction. But this moment was yours, and so Azriel refrained from giving in to his baser physical desires. His tongue sang praises against your cunt, his hymns translated to the exquisite moans that fell from your lips.

It wasn’t long before you were toppling over that wonderful edge into what felt like a never ending orgasm. You could barely register the change in your positions again, head spinning and dizzy with insurmountable pleasure; before you knew it, your back was pressed against the cool sheets of the bed, eyes glassy with a post-orgasm haze.

Azriel leaned down to kiss you then, a sweet contrast to the near indecent way you could taste yourself lingering on his lips. He took his time kissing you, sending you wave after wave of undying love and loyalty down that invisible golden tether wound tight around your heart.

You briefly thought of returning the favor, of flipping him onto his back and putting your mouth on him in just the way you knew would coax those wonderfully rare sounds of unbridled, wanton pleasure from him. But his body was heavy against yours – a more than welcome comfort – and you couldn’t find the strength in you to pull away from the warmth of his skin.

You arched into him as you wound your arms around his neck, pulling him closer while you encircled your legs around his waist. Relishing in the way he shuddered against you, you urged your hips up to grind against his, aching for the feel of him despite having just orgasmed. Twice.

Thankfully he obliged you, shifting to ease himself inside you, slowly – gods, so slowly – pushing into you with the deliberation and practiced self-discipline of a male centuries trained in espionage.

Azriel let out a half-restrained groan when his hips were flush against yours, always marveling at how close you could make him without even lifting a finger. He had meant to take a few moments to collect himself, not wanting to ruin the moment with a quick release (though admittedly he was struggling), but you shifted beneath him impatiently as you whispered salacious pleas into the shell of his ear.

The drag of his cock in and out of you was a pleasure you weren’t sure you’d ever get used to, and you couldn’t help the prurient sounds that tumbled from your lips. Though, this just seemed to urge Azriel faster, more insistent in the most delicious way.

You knew he was close by the way his breath hitched in his throat and his fingers tightened around the flesh of your thigh. The feel of his abs flexing as he pushed his hips into yours and the perfectly timed grind of his hips against your clit filled your head with a heady, hazy bliss and you nearly forgot where you were for a moment.

You wound your fingers into his hair to steady him as you bit kisses into his jaw, nails raking a gentle path of encouragement down his back.

“Come for me, Az,” you half-pleaded, half-commanded.

And he did. With a gasp and moan so beautiful it sent you into another spiral of pleasure, arching into him as he whispered incoherent praises into your neck.

As you basked in the aftermath, chest heaving and legs tangled beneath your fluffy duvet, Azriel couldn’t help but feel a lightening in his chest. He once again thought of how he had been shown so much mercy, so much kindness by the Mother, the gods – who or whatever governed the celestial plane of existence – to be bound so graciously to you. He never ceased to be amazed that he had met his goddess incarnate and had the overwhelming honor of loving her.

With your cheek resting above his heart, he didn’t doubt that you could hear the quickening of his pulse when he pressed his lips to your hair. “I love you.”

Those three words were his prayer, his penance, his praise, and he would never stop offering them to you so long as you allowed him the privilege of saying them. He could feel you smile as you kissed his collarbone, sleepily offering your benediction in return, “Love you.”

As you fell asleep, encased in the warmth and safety of his arms, he idly traced the lines of your mating tattoo, swirling tendrils of ink dancing up your hip to your waist. He always loved how they were so reminiscent of his shadows. The shadows that were now winding through your hair and tickling your cheeks in adoration.

As he too began slipping into the sweet relief of slumber, he briefly thought of his mission – it had felt so far away, so long ago now that he was guarded within the shield of your presence – and the guilt and sorrow he’d feel in the coming days. He used to dread the aftermath of his work, never allowing himself to rest comfortably for fear that sleep would be too much of an undeserved reprieve for the atrocities he’d committed.

But ever since he selfishly allowed himself to love and be loved by you, he had found solace in your embrace. You couldn’t offer absolution of his sins – if such a thing even existed – but he was certain you were his salvation. An offering from the Cauldron – that he was convinced he was wholly unworthy of – as a chance to right his wrongs. You listened and loved him and saw him for all of the parts he was ashamed of, and for that he would willingly spend the rest of his life striving to deserve.

(Though he was sure you’d frown at him and adamantly insist that he need not do anything but exist to deserve the love you gave him.)

As he let himself descend into the comforting darkness of sleep, Azriel thought that if he would be punished in his next life for the sins he committed in this one, as long as he’d be able to love you through it all it would be worth it.

851 notes · View notes

judespoets · 3 months

Note

jude and reader haven’t seen each other in a while, when the see each other again he notices she’s lost a lot of weight quickly unhealthily

worried | jude bellingham

pairing: jude bellingham x fem!reader

warnings: mentions of: disordered eating, body image struggles and underweight

a/n: this is a bit messy so i hope it’s what u were imagining!

jude and you haven’t seen each other for more than 4 months.

and it was absolute torture.

back when he was at dortmund the way wasn’t that far to england so you saw each other more often. But now with him at madrid, it was hard.

especially with school, you wanted to finish your degree before moving in with jude, just in case, you always said. you wanted to have something in your hand, something to work with, in case something happens between the two of you.

but school was equally as hard, you were drained, not having anyone to help you, your parents moved back to their hometown in italy when you were eighteen and started university.

you felt the weight of your university work pressing down on your shoulders as you sat in your small, dimly lit apartment in England.

Despite the constant ache of missing Jude, you didn't want to burden him with your struggles. You knew how important his career was and didn't want to add to his stress. So, you kept your feelings to yourself, focusing on your studies and trying to manage everything on your own.

The days blurred together in a haze of lectures, assignments, and endless hours in the library. Your friends noticed you growing silent and withdrawal, but you brushed off their concerns with a forced smile and a few words about being busy. You felt like you were barely keeping your head above water, but you were determined not to let anyone see how much you was struggling.

Jude, meanwhile, was busy with his training schedule. He missed you terribly but was unaware of how bad things had gotten for you. He would send you texts and voice messages whenever he had a spare moment, but your responses were often brief and delayed.

You felt the weight of your university work pressing down on your shoulders as you sat in your small, dimly lit apartment in England. Your parents had moved back to Italy when you started university at 18, leaving you alone to navigate this new chapter of your life. The distance between you and your loved ones was becoming unbearable, and the stress of your studies only added to your loneliness.

You had always struggled with taking care of yourself during stressful times, and now was no exception. Your eating habits had become erratic; you often skipped meals, telling yourself you were too busy to eat. The constant bombardment of messages you saw because of girls who want jude, made you feel insecure about your body, and you became fixated on the idea that you needed to be thinner to feel validated, both academically and personally.

Despite the constant ache of missing Jude, you didn't want to burden him with your struggles. You knew how important his career was and didn't want to add to his stress. So, you kept your feelings to herself, focusing on your studies and trying to manage everything on your own.

One evening, after an exhausting day of training, Jude sat down and listened to your last voice message again. There was something in your tone that worried him. It was subdued, almost mechanical. He sent you a text, asking if everything was okay, but received no immediate response.

you, on the other hand, were sitting alone in your apartment, staring blankly at your computer screen. your phone buzzed with Jude's message, but you couldn't bring yourself to answer. You felt a wave of guilt and sadness wash over you. You wanted to talk to him, to hear his voice, but the thought of breaking down in front of him was too much to bear.

That night, you cried yourself to sleep, feeling more alone than ever. You knew you needed to reach out to someone, anyone, but your pride and fear held you back. The next morning, you dragged herself out of bed and headed to class, determined to push through another day.

As the weeks went by, your isolation deepened. Your eating habits worsened, and you found yourself constantly comparing your body to the flawless images you saw online. You kept telling yourself that you just needed to get through this semester, that things would get better eventually. But the loneliness and pressure continued to build, a constant weight on your chest.

Jude, sensing something was wrong but unsure of how to help from afar, decided to talk to one of your close friends, Emma. He hoped she could give him some insight into what was going on.

“Hey, Emma. It’s Jude,” he began, feeling a bit awkward. “I’m really worried about (Y/N). She doesn’t seem herself lately. Have you noticed anything?”

Emma sighed, relief flooding through her that someone else shared her concerns. “Yeah, Jude, I have. She’s been really withdrawn and seems overwhelmed. I’ve tried to talk to her, but she insists she’s fine. She doesn’t look well either, she looks sick, even. Maybe she’ll open up to you.”

Jude felt a pang of guilt and worry. He resolved to do whatever he could to support you, even from a distance. He started sending you longer messages, sharing more about his own day and gently encouraging you to talk to him. He also made sure to send little reminders of his love and support, hoping to bridge the gap between them.

Your hadn't responded to Jude's texts for two days, which left him increasingly anxious. Despite his training schedule with Real Madrid in Madrid, thoughts of your well-being consumed him. During breaks in practice, he found it difficult to concentrate, his mind wandering back to you.

Jude knew you struggled with taking care of yourself during stressful times, especially with eating regularly and feeling pressured by academic expectations. He had seen firsthand how you could become overwhelmed, and the silence from your end only heightened his concern.

One evening, after a particularly intense training session, Jude sat in his apartment, staring at his phone. He had sent several messages to you throughout the day, hoping for a response that never came. Each unanswered text gnawed at him, filling him with a sense of dread.

Finally, unable to bear the uncertainty any longer, Jude decided to call you again. The phone rang several times before going to voicemail. His worry deepened. He left a message, trying to sound calm despite the rising panic in his voice. "Hey babe, it's me. Just checking in. I haven't heard from you in a while, and I'm getting a bit worried. Please call me back when you get this."

Minutes turned into hours, and still, there was no response. Jude paced his apartment, his mind racing with worst-case scenarios. He knew he couldn't just sit and wait any longer.

Jude took a deep breath and dialed your number again. When it went straight to voicemail once more, he made a decision. He grabbed his phone and called the coach, his voice urgent and determined.

"Coach, I need to talk to you," Jude began, his tone serious and focused. "I'm really worried about (Y/N). She hasn't responded to any of my messages for two days, and I can't shake this feeling that something might be wrong. I need to go check on her."

Carlo listened quietly, understanding the gravity of Jude's concern. "Jude, I trust your judgment. If you feel this strongly, go ahead and go. We'll manage here."

With a sense of relief that he was taking action, Jude quickly packed a few essentials, including a small bag with some of your favorite things. He booked a flight for early the next morning, wanting to get to you as soon as possible.

The hours until his departure dragged on, filled with restless anticipation.

Jude couldn't shake the worry that gnawed at him, but the thought of finally being able to see you gave him a sense of purpose.

Late into the night, Jude sent one last message to you, letting you know he was coming. "Baby, I'm on my way. Please let me know you're okay," he typed, hoping desperately for a response.

With everything packed and his flight confirmed, Jude finally allowed himself a moment of rest. He closed his eyes, imagining the relief he would feel when he finally saw you again, safe and sound in England.

Jude's flight from Madrid to England felt like an eternity of restless anticipation. The worry for you gnawed at him with every passing minute, intensifying as the plane descended towards London.

His thoughts were consumed by your well-being, imagining various scenarios of what he might find.

As Jude hurried through the airport terminal, he checked his phone compulsively for any message from you, but there was still nothing. Anxiety gripped him tightly as he hailed a taxi to take him to your apartment.

The drive seemed interminable, each passing street reminding him of the distance that had kept you apart during these days.

When Jude finally arrived at your apartment building, he felt a mix of relief and apprehension. He took a deep breath before climbing the stairs to your floor. Standing in front of your door, he hesitated for a moment, gathering his resolve before knocking firmly.

“Jude?" Your voice was tinged with surprise and relief, but Jude's attention was immediately drawn to your appearance. You looked pale and fragile, your once vibrant spirit subdued.

But what struck him the most was how much thinner you had become since the last time you were together.

"Baby..." Jude's voice caught in his throat as he took in your appearance. He pulled you into a tight embrace, his arms trembling slightly as he held you close. "You're so thin," he whispered, his voice filled with concern and sadness.

You buried your face in his chest, tears streaming down your cheeks. "I... I've been struggling," you admitted softly, your voice barely above a whisper. "With everything."

Jude gently guided you inside, closing the door behind you. He sat down with you on the couch, never letting go of your hand. "Why didn't you tell me?" he asked softly, his heart breaking for you.

You shook your head, your gaze downcast. "I didn't want to bother you," you confessed. "I thought I could handle it on my own."

Jude tilted your chin up gently, meeting your eyes with his own filled with concern. "Love, you're never a bother to me. I care about you more than anything. Please, let me help."

You took a shaky breath, your gaze dropping to your hands. "It's just... everything feels so overwhelming," you admitted in a rush, as if the words were too heavy to hold inside any longer. "The university work, my parents being far away, and... and feeling like I'm not good enough."

Jude's heart ached for you. He knew how hard you had always been on herself, striving for perfection in everything you did. "You are more than good enough, my love," he said gently, squeezing your hand reassuringly. "You're incredible. But you don't have to do everything alone. We can do this together."

You nodded, tears welling up in your eyes as you felt the weight of Jude's support. "I've been... I've been struggling to eat regularly," you admitted quietly, your voice cracking with emotion. "And I've been feeling so insecure about... about everything."

Jude's heart sank as he heard your confession. He gently pulled you closer, holding you as you let out a quiet sob. "I'm so sorry you've been going through this alone," he whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. "But you're not alone anymore. I'm here now, and I'm not going anywhere."

You clung to him, feeling a mix of relief and fear. Opening up about your struggles had been daunting, but Jude's support gave you a newfound sense of strength. "Thank you," you whispered, your voice trembling with gratitude.

“Baby, i’ll take you to madrid with me. No arguments. You’ll finish uni online and you’ll stop with some of your courses. At least until you’re better.” Jude said firmly but still full of concern, he didn’t know how to act either.

“I will. I don’t want to be alone anymore.” You whispered, cuddling into him further.

“You were never alone, my love. And you never will be. I love you so much.”

#jude bellingham #judespoets #jude bellingham fic #jude bellingham blurb #jude bellingham imagine #jude bellingham one shot #jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham headcanons #jude bellingham fluff

704 notes · View notes

praisethegabs · 11 months

Text

B.D.S.M

Leon Kennedy x F!Mistress!Reader

synopsis: leon has a guilty pleasure, which is a deep secret no one knows. every time after a stressful mission, leon goes to this particular place to release his tension. you're too familiar with the man, already knowing what he loves. he's your favorite customer. you're his favorite mistress.

warnings: PURE SMUT. bdsm on its edge. degradation kink, praise kink, shibari, use of pet names, sex toys, sub!leon and dom!reader, handjob, edging, spanking, gaging, spanking, flogging, role-playing.

word count: 3735k

a/n: sub!leon always comes to my mind for unknown reasons. he's so fucking cute and awkward. sometimes, I don't see him as the dominant one, I think he's more of a switch. anyway, I wrote this bc I thought it would be funny to change sides (since the last smut I wrote was with dom!leon)

Leon's footsteps echoed through the corridor as he made his way back home. His mind was still reeling from the stress of the mission he had just completed. The weight of the world seemed to press down on his shoulders, and he yearned for a way to escape the constant tension that plagued him.

It was almost three in the morning, but he didn't care. Due to the nature of his job, Leon had a highly irregular schedule. His timing was inconsistent, and he did not have a set time to return home. It could be morning, afternoon, evening, or the middle of the night. Although his busy schedule demanded most of his time, Leon still had something that couldn't be postponed.

As he entered his apartment, he casually threw his leather jacket onto a chair and ran his hand through his tousled hair. The peaceful solitude of his home only intensified the profound loneliness that had settled deep within him. He needed a release, a way to forget the horrors he had witnessed. With a sigh, he reached for his phone and dialed a number that he had carefully stored in his contacts. The screen lit up, and he waited for it to ring. He felt a mixture of anticipation and relief when the call was answered.

"Hello," a sultry voice purred on the other end of the line. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

Leon's voice was filled with a mixture of longing and vulnerability as he replied, "I need to see you, Mistress."

A wicked smile played on your lips as you spoke on the other end of the line. "Of course, darling. I have just the thing to help you forget about your troubles. How soon can you come to my dungeon?"

Leon quickly checked his schedule. "I can be there in an hour," he replied.

"Perfect," you purred. "Prepare yourself and don't keep me waiting. We have much to explore, and I promise you that by the time we're done, all your worries will be left far behind."

As the call ended, Leon felt a renewed sense of anticipation and excitement. Your dungeon provides a sanctuary from the outside world, a place where he can relinquish control and seek solace in the pain and pleasure you provide. It was his escape, a way to let go of the burden he carried, if only for a few precious hours.

As Leon sipped a glass of wine, he gazed out of the window, his thoughts in turmoil. His work demanded discipline, control, and unwavering focus. Yet, it was in the realm of submission and surrender that he found the release he craved - an escape from the relentless pressure of his responsibilities.

Leon had always been a man of contradictions, and his desire for you was no exception. He wondered if his fascination with you was a reflection of his own internal struggles, a means to delve into the depths of his own desires and vulnerabilities. Guilt gnawed at him as he thought about the secrets he kept and the double life he led.

But as he replayed the memories of their encounters in his mind, he couldn't deny the intoxicating allure of your power and the blissful release it provided. It was a guilty pleasure he couldn't resist, a secret aspect of his life that provided him with a sense of liberation he couldn't find anywhere else.

You knew absolutely nothing about Leon, except for his preferences.

He always liked the rough style. As a skilled dominatrix, you know how to please a man. Since he discovered you, he has requested to become your exclusive client, and the payment he has provided is sufficient to reserve your availability exclusively for him. Fortunately, you were familiar with his schedule, so you began working mostly at night, which suited him perfectly.

You have set up an entire dungeon in your basement. It was the perfect place to meet his needs exactly as he wanted it.

At first, seeing his physique made you think he would be a great dominant. However, you eventually found out that he was more of a submissive man. Completely bent over your knees, ready to obey your commands without hesitation. Most dungeons do not permit sexual intercourse between dominants and submissives, but for him, this dynamic does not adhere to such restrictions. Since you have a dungeon in your own home, you have decided to make some slight modifications to the rules.

Obviously, you have never had sex with him, but other aspects of your relationship work just fine.

Leon's footsteps echoed through the garden as he made his way towards the entrance of his hidden sanctuary. Each step was a solemn reminder of the mission that had just been concluded. The scent of leather and candle wax hung in the air, familiar and comforting. He pushed open the unassuming door at the end of the hallway, revealing a hidden secret world beyond.

The dungeon served as a sanctuary for him, a place where he could escape the burdens of his perilous existence. His eyes quickly adjusted to the dim lighting, and there you were, dressed in black leather, waiting for him in the center of the room. Your presence commands attention; your aura is a captivating blend of power and sensuality.

"Welcome back, Kennedy," you purred, your lips curling into a mischievous grin. "You're not late; you arrived just in time."

Leon's tense shoulders relaxed as he stepped further into the dungeon, the door clicking shut behind him. He locked eyes with you, and a silent understanding passed between the two of you. He shed his jacket, the leather creaking as he tossed it aside, revealing the tension that had built up in his muscles during the mission.

You moved towards him, the sound of your heels clicking against the cold stone floor, with a devious glint in your eyes. "You look like you've had a rough day, my dear," you said, as your fingers lightly traced the contours of his jaw. "But, you know, I'm here to take care of you."

"Yes, Mistress," he nodded, closing his eyes to savor your touch and emitting a slight moan.

"Strip now," you ordered him, and stepped back to prepare the rest of the room and your toys.

The words were both a promise and a command, and Leon nodded in agreement. He needed this - the sensation of control slipping away from his grasp, the catharsis of pain and pleasure intertwined. You led him to the St. Andrew's Cross, a symbol of his shared desire for submission and domination.

With practiced ease, you secured his wrists and ankles to the cross, using leather restraints to keep him in place. Leon's heart raced, his mind focused solely on the anticipation of what would come next. The room seemed to shrink, closing in around him, leaving only the two of them and the palpable tension in the air.

You leaned in, your lips brushing against his earlobe. "What would you like today, darling?" You whispered, asking your question.

"Take me to the edge, Mistress," Leon said, gazing at you with unwavering confidence.

"Very well," you nodded in agreement. "Remember the safe word, just in case."

Leon nodded once more and prepared himself for what was about to begin. He was waiting for the first strike to experience pleasure, but nothing happened. His eyes met yours, and he felt a shiver down his spine when he noticed the smile on your face.

"Aren't you forgetting something?" You approached him seductively, holding a flogger in your hands, your nails digging into his flesh.

"I forgot my collar, Mistress," he said, his breath heavy with the sudden realization that he had forgotten the only item he was permitted to wear. "I'm sorry, Mistress."

"Oh, bunny, you know we don't accept apologies," you said, biting his earlobe. "And do you know what this means?"

Leon nodded, biting his lip. He felt the first whip strike him hard, causing him to emit a loud moan. He tightly grips the leather restraints on his wrists, and the second blow leaves a red mark on his stomach. The third strike narrowly missed his cock and you can see him trembling as each blow compels him to seek relief from the agony of your flogging.

"Please, Mistress, forgive me," Leon begs, as you continue to flog him. Another strike, another groan.

"Have you learned your lesson, bunny?" You asked, delivering another whip to him, striking harder.

“Yes, Mistress. I did” Leon almost yelled, trying helplessly to avoid your strikes. His body was already red from the flogging. "Please, I won't forget it anymore."

You stopped, letting the flog aside. You took a leather collar from the drawer and placed it around his neck. His breath was heavy, and his entire body was shaking. He was indeed enjoying the anticipation of the punishment, although he had no idea what was about to happen. You untied him from the St. Andrews Cross, and he stood there, waiting for your next command.

"Stand in the center of the room," you commanded, holding a remote. He nods, walking with his naked, red body to the center of the dungeon.

You threw a silver spreader bar in his direction, and you didn't have to say it twice. Leon secured his ankles in the spreader bar, and once he was done, he glanced at you again. Silently, you pressed the button and then shackled his wrists to a drop-down ceiling bar. Pressing the button again, he stretched his arms in the air. The bondage dungeon is filled with furniture that enables you to attach him to any object in whichever manner you please.

Now he stands completely naked, with his ankles spread apart by a spreader bar and his arms stretched in the air, wearing nothing but his collar.

You stand before him, wearing a devilish smile on your lips. Suddenly, you firmly grasp his erect penis and apply pressure. You can see tears welling up in his sapphire-blue eyes as he bites his lip and tightly grips the shackles above his head. You squeeze it harder, and he gasps, yelping in pain. You paused for a moment, observing him. Another intense squeeze, another wave of pain, and he screams out loud. You finally release his cock and he exhales with relief, tears still streaming down his cheek.

"You're nothing but a sex toy. Look at you, so miserable," you said, as you walked around him and slapped his ass. "Such a naughty boy, desperate to be humiliated, aren't you?"

"Yes, Mistress," his voice trembles as you slap his ass.

"Your purpose is to provide fuckings, am I right?" You asked again, delivering another slap to him, causing his body to jerk.

"Yes, Mistress," Leon nods again, his body jerking with each slap against his sensitive skin.

"Who owns you, fuckboy?" You stepped closer, gripping his hair firmly, causing him to emit a soft groan.

"You do, Mistress," he quickly replies, his Adam's apple bobbing rapidly up and down.

"Do I own your cock as well?" You asked again, leaving love bites on his skin.

"Yes, Mistress, you do."

You take his cock again, smacking it harder and making him yelp again. Tears were already rolling down his cheeks once more. You walk to your box of instruments and retrieve the manuscript clips. You take one clamp, gently open it, and place it over his left nipple. Carefully close the clamp, ensuring that it does not cause any pain. He tries to hold his breath and keep his mouth shut while you repeat the same process on his right nipple.

"Don't worry, I'm sure you'll bear it all night," you wink at him, and he nods silently.

Then, your hand reached his cock again and you started to masturbate him. You can see his hands tightly gripping the shackles, and his breath growing heavier with each passing second. Leon began moaning, with each moan growing louder as you continued to stimulate him with your hands. And you keep masturbating him until you know he's close.

And then, you come to a complete stop, causing him to whine out loud.

"Bad boys don't get rewarded," you said, and pressed the button to lower the ceiling bar. "Kneel."

He obeys by kneeling down. The ceiling is high enough for him to stretch his arms in the air, and you are sitting directly in front of him. You don't have to say anything; he already knows what to do. Leon crawls between your legs and opens his mouth. He bends forward, his arms stretching upward before him. The restraints are not sufficient to allow him to approach you, and observing him beg for your pussy amuses you.

"Please, Mistress, allow me to pleasure you in my mouth” he begs, his voice filled with desperation as he fights back tears, inching closer to you.

His cock twitches and aches. He's desperate to be released, to ejaculate all over his body, longing to feel your touch. You keep teasing him by not allowing him to get closer to you, making him see your wide pussy open in front of him, yet denying him the ability to touch or engage with you.

"Please, I'm begging, Mistress," he pleads again, desperately trying to reach you.

"Such a pathetic, whining boy," you said, tightly gripping his jaw in your hands.

You released his wrists and ankles, instructing him to walk towards the bondage horse. He silently obeys you and walks straight to the corner of the room. With red ropes, you tied his arms and hands behind his back. Its shape is that of a half barrel with wide ledges and wings, covered in black leather. Leon positions his knees on each wing, and you proceed to shackle him once more, ensuring that he is securely locked on the edge of the frame. His collar is attached by chains on both sides to the ceiling bar, keeping his head up and facing forward.

"What do you deserve?" you ask, as you walk around the room and pick up your flogger once more.

"To be punished, Mistress," he responds, his eyes locked on the wall in front of him.

"Why?" you asked before striking him hard.

"Because I am a bad man," Leon says, his body jerking again with the whimpering.

You smiled, satisfied, and started to whip him until his entire back was red. When you're done with his back, you move to face him, squeezing his cock again. Leon is on the verge of tears, gasping and unable to control himself. In an instant, without your command, he ejaculates onto your hand. His entire face turns red.

"Did I say you could cum?" you asked him, squeezing his sensitive cock, causing him to whine in pain once more.

"No, Mistress. I'm sorry," he begs, tears falling down his face once more.

"Privilege revoked," you hissed, walking towards your torment box. Leon is visually impaired, but he sheds tears when he senses something cold around his cock. He knows what it is. "You'll come only when I say so."

You walk back to the corner of the room after locking the chastity cage on him. When you return, Leon flinches slightly as he feels your thumb pressing against him from behind. You uses oil and you're smearing it around his anus. A finger slips, then your thumb. Another finger, he already knows what's coming.

He feels the rubber sliding inside, and he moans again. He feels the initial pain, but he's okay with it. You slide it further, allowing the oil to lubricate him internally. You pull back the toy and gently begin a rhythmic back-and-forth fucking of his ass. You have precision and an obvious regular rhythm. Leon moans, closing his eyes and feeling the helplessness of his submission. You insert the toy into him, and he can hear you pressing a button.

It starts to vibrate inside his hole.

To keep him quiet, you place a ball gag in his mouth and leave him in his current state. He is tormented by a dildo in his anus, restrained by shackles and ropes, rendering him unable to move, resist, or voice any complaints. You sit, playing with the remote control of the device in your hands, adjusting the intensity to elicit either loud moans or soft whines from him.

The cock cage on him is painful, and he is aware of it. With his already aroused state, it becomes nearly impossible for him to cum without your consent, and he is aware that this is precisely what you desire. He is unable to move, but the vibration in his ass makes his flesh to ripple. It makes him shake his body. Leon moans again, whether from the pain caused by the cage or the vibration inside his ass. He shakes his head, the only movement he can make.

You press the button, and he sighs with relief, but not completely. You pump him again a few times and stop. You thrust into him quickly and forcefully, causing him to groan and moan. After some time, there is a final push, a powerful thrust that is enough to rock the bondage horse. He moans aloud again. You walk around the corner again and gently push something metallic, cold, and smooth inside his ass. Leon feels the object and thinks it's large, expanding inside him. Then, it pops in, causing a painful stretch that makes him scream again.

"Clean it," you tell him, pointing to his white semen on the leather bondage material. You unshackle his collar from the ceiling bar and his ankles from the restraints, but keep his arms tied with the ropes.

He obediently leans over from his waist until his tongue reaches the black leather. He licks it in wide swaths, gathering all his juices from his previous unauthorized release, leaving only his saliva behind.

You can see the color of his cock. He's so hard and sensitive. When Leon finishes cleaning the bondage horse, he kneels in front of you, waiting patiently. He is clearly struggling to hold back his orgasm, but at the same time, he is on the brink of climax.

"Desperate to cum, huh?” you teased, gently stimulating his sensitive nipples, eliciting another groan from him.

"Yes, Mistress," he says, his voice shaking once more.

You sat in an armchair in front of him, your legs spread apart, offering a tantalizing view of your glistening arousal. He doesn't move, but when he sees you nod, he knows what to do. He leans closer, and you can feel his tongue on your wet, sensitive, and swollen clit. He sucks you, savoring your taste, and moaning from the pleasure mixed with the slight pain he feels on his cock. You moan and grip his hair tightly, urging him to continue sucking you.

And when you reach your orgasm, Leon has to force himself to calm down, feeling your cunt on his face. His cock is hurting and you decide to please him in the appropriate manner.

“Color” you ask him, playfully tweaking his nipple.

"Green, Mistress," he says, trembling. He's lying.

"What color is it, bunny?" you asked him again, gripping the metal of his collar.

"Yellow, Mistress," Leon shakes. The pain in his cock is excruciating.

You released his cock from the cage, and he sighed with relief, only to gasp at your touch. He was very sensitive, and you started to masturbate him again. You took your magic wand and placed it under his dick, vibrating with intense power, while your other hand moved up and down on him. Leon can't last long. He's already too close to reaching orgasm. You, on the other hand, don't care. You continue to deliberate, his rhythm becoming tense.

"Go on, be a good boy and cum for your Mistress," you said, increasing your pace on him.

The words are enough. It emanates from his core and bursts out. His thighs and red belly shuddered first, as if he were being electrocuted. Then, it surged upward, causing his entire chest to shake as he let out a guttural moan, a mixture of pain and pleasure. Afterward, you removed the clips from his nipples, and he yelped and cried again. You also removed the plug from his anus, leaving it elsewhere.

Now, you have him standing at the end of the bondage horse again, and you instruct him to bend over and protrude his ass out. You tied him with the red ropes in a different manner, and he obeys you. This time, you take a flogger to his ass, almost caressing his cheeks with its sleek leather strands. Then, it comes out of nowhere.

The brutal spank of the cane striking his ass. He screams.

You cane him again, this time on his right ass cheek. He screams again and sobs. The third strike goes again. Leon yells.

You guide him to a nearby mirror and compel him to observe the three red marks on his ass.

He's crying. You had successfully led him to his edge, but you knew when to stop. You removed the gag from his mouth and untied the ropes that had left his arms almost purple. Then, you placed a robe on him. Aftercare is important, even in this type of situation.

"Are you okay?" you asked, leading him to the sofa in the opposite corner. "I know you wanted to be on the edge, but this is dangerous. Did something happen?"

"I'm fine, thanks," Leon says softly, although his entire body is in pain. "Just... don't worry, okay? I like it when you get rough with me."

"I'm not complaining, but are you sure you're okay?" you asked, embracing him and allowing his head to rest on your chest.

"I'm fine, trust me," he chuckles.

There is a moment of silence. Usually, he doesn't stay for aftercare. He gets what he wants and then leaves, but there's something different this time. You don't say anything, you decide to give him some space. This night was heavily different from the others, and you're not sure he's really alright.

“Can we do it again?” He lifts his head so he can see you. “But this time, can you blindfold me?”

You smirk. It's time for another round.

557 notes · View notes

deepcollectionredbird · 5 months

Text

Jonesy had always carried the burden of a troubled past, one filled with heartache and loneliness. His childhood had been a whirlwind of neglect by his uncaring parents, and financial hardships. Growing up, he’d known emptiness and hunger all too well, often going days without a proper meal, and the constant starvation had left him with a perpetually slight frame. Things only got tougher as he grew older, and realized that he needed to make some money to get by on his own… and when he found out he was pregnant at 19 — just before he planned to finally leave his unsteady childhood home — his world was turned upside down.

The idea of becoming a father at his young age filled him with dread, fearing he would be unable to provide for his child, or form a meaningful bond with them. Years and years of being paid nothing but dust by his parents caused him to feel detached and unable to connect with others… like an outsider in his own life. his own mother and father had failed him, and he didn’t want to continue that cycle.

Haunted by the ghosts of his upbringing, Jonesy was harried by guilt and shame, convinced that he was inadequate to be a parent. He didn’t have his own place, a car to drive around, or hardly enough money to afford to take care of anyone other than himself. Determined not to repeat the history of neglect and instability, he made the difficult decision to give his baby up for adoption early on in his pregnancy. The weight of his choice hung heavy on his heart, but he convinced himself it was for the best.

As the months passed, Jonesy's belly swelled big and full with the life growing inside him. Despite his initial reservations, he found himself marveling at the miracle of pregnancy. The kicks and flutters from within brought a sense of peace and joy he had never experienced before… a newfound connection. He found solace in the idea that this little being was a part of him. As he watched his slender body grow larger, to make room for the baby, he began to appreciate the miracle of life that was unfolding within him… and it gave him the motivation to break the cycle, and make something of himself. He didn’t know how or where, but he was going to get a job, and save up for his baby.

After cashing a few paychecks, and becoming more self-sufficient, he soon realized that, despite his own hardships, he had the capacity to love and nurture a child in ways he never thought possible for himself. And with each passing day, he grew more certain that this unexpected journey was leading him to a place of joy and fulfillment he had never thought attainable. Jonesy began to let go of his fear and doubt, allowing himself to believe that, perhaps, he could turn out to be a good parent after all… and strive to be everything that his own mother and father couldn’t be for him. The love he felt for the baby growing inside him gave him hope for a future that he never dared to imagine before.

#mpreg #mpreg story #mpreg belly

261 notes · View notes

xcherryerim · 6 months

Text

A Helping Hand

Touch starved Mike x gn!reader | wc: 2.4k

“It will take a while for the scars in my heart to heal, that’s what I believed. At some point, I am in your embrace. You touch my heart baby” — Touch by Miss A

SMUT ONE SHOT | MDNI | +18 ONLY

In the warm lit bathroom, illuminated only by a single soft glow of the cheap lightbulb, Mike sat on a plastic chair, his broken leg propped up on a stack of towels. The lukewarm water cascaded over his body, mingling with the salty tears that traced down his pale cheeks.

His eyes, red-rimmed and glistening, pleaded with yours as he whispered, "Please touch me."

For the past few weeks, you'd been there for Mike whenever he needed you. He was once a self-sufficient man who refused help from others, but now that his leg was momentarily immobilized, he found himself at the mercy of those around him. His job not compensating for his leave, coupled with the overwhelming weight of daily struggles, had left him feeling trapped and helpless.

The realization that his life had spiraled out of control weighed heavily on his shoulders. It was one thing to acknowledge the despair, but quite another to confront it head-on with nothing but time on his hands. In this cramped bathroom, surrounded by tiled walls, he felt even smaller, more isolated than ever.

With tenderness and care, you stepped into the shower stall, succumbing to the task of helping Mike bathe despite the challenges posed by his injured leg. As the warm water poured down upon both of you, you began to wash his hair with the specialized shampoo and conditioner, working the suds through his locks with gentle precision.

When you moved onto his back, your fingertips brushed over his tense muscles, tracing the web of pain etched into his skin. Each stroke, each caress seemed to pull at the threads of his empty heart, finally, he couldn't contain it any longer when you stood in front of him, trying to wash his neck and chest. His fragile facade cracked as tears formed into his honey soulless eyes.

Looking at his reddened eyes and the sniffling sounds emanating from his nose, concern washed over you. "Mike, are you alright?" you inquired, worry lacing your words.

"Please touch me," he choked out, his voice barely above a whisper. "Just… touch me. Please."

Your heart ached for him, seeing him like this - broken, vulnerable, and begging for human connection. His erection strained against the fabric of his shorts, an unmistakable sign of his need for intimacy.

“I know I'm asking too much, I know I've been a burden with all the favors you've done for me these past few days, but I just—" Mike hesitated, his voice breaking as he struggled to find the right words.

His admission hung in the air between you, thick with guilt and the weight of his burgeoning dependency on your kindness.

With a deep, shuddering breath, he continued, "I just can't take this loneliness any longer."

His confession struck you like a punch to the gut, his vulnerability laying bare the emotional toll his situation had taken on him. You could see the fear lurking in his eyes, the desperate plea for understanding and support. And though a part of you yearned to provide the comfort he sought, you also knew that giving in would only complicate matters further.

Instead, you opted for a different approach, seeking to ease his pain in words rather than touch.

"Mike, I understand how hard this must be for you," you said softly. "But you're not alone, and we'll get through it together. I promise."

Your hand lingered on his shoulder, a tentative gesture of solidarity, offering the smallest measure of comfort without breaching the boundaries of your friendship.

Despite the distance you maintained, you could feel the tension in his frame, the unraveling of his composure under the strain of his emotions.

"You don't find me attractive?" he asked, his voice strained as if the very thought pained him. Tears welled in his eyes, threatening to spill over as he searched your face for answers. "I... I didn't mean to push you, I just..."

Swallowing hard, you replied softly, "It's not that, Mike. It's just... your request would change things between us. Our friendship would never be the same."

Defeat washed over his features, and he shifted his gaze downward, fixating on his length before quickly looking away in embarrassment. "I just want to feel wanted, desired, useful to someone... anything..." he whispered, the depth of his anguish echoing in every word.

"It could be just once," Mike suggested, grasping at any sliver of hope he could find. His hopeful eyes locked onto yours, their pleading depths reflecting the faint light from the bathroom fixture.

His grip on your hand tightened, a silent prayer that you'd consider his desperate proposal. The air grew heavier with his unspoken desires, the weight of his needs bearing down upon both of you in the confined space.

“Our secret.”

You stood there, torn between compassion and conviction, struggling to reconcile the gravity of the situation. It was impossible to ignore the sincerity in his gaze, the raw need for human connection that seemed to emanate from him. Yet, you couldn't shake the sense that giving in would irreparably alter the course of your relationship.

Finally, you managed to find your voice, your tone heavy with uncertainty as you answered, "Mike, I don't think it's a good idea. This isn't something we can undo or ignore later.” Uncertainty lacing your words.

But his grasp on your hand tightened, his pleading gaze never wavering. "I don't want to ignore it. I want you, I truly do. Please, just do this for me." His fingers trailed along your palm, his touch lingering on your skin as he guided it towards his trembling form. When his hand paused at his pelvis, you felt the heat radiating from him, a testament to the turmoil within.

Staring into your eyes, he implored you once more, his voice quivering with the weight of his longing. You could see the torment reflected in his pupils, the raw honesty of his need. And yet, despite the yearning, you knew that giving in would be crossing a line neither of you could return from.

Yet you found yourself drawn to the sight before you: his waterlogged body, the foggy atmosphere, and the haunting desperation in his eyes.

With a shaky breath, you gave in, nodding reluctantly in agreement with his plea. "But, this never happened," you insisted, attempting to impose some semblance of control over the situation.

Slowly, your hand descended to meet his base, the warmth of his skin contrasting with the dampness of the surroundings. Each nerve in your body screamed at you to stop, urging you to reconsider the implications of your actions. But the anguish in his eyes pulled you forward, forcing you to grapple with the reality of his suffering.

Biting your lip, you closed your eyes, swallowing hard as you began to move your hand, knowing full well that this moment would forever change the course of your lives. The steamy air seemed to hold its breath, waiting for the outcome of your decision as the two of you were in the shower, bound by a secret neither of you could escape.

Mike nodded numbly, a silent agreement between you both as he attempted to stifle the rising cries of pleasure. "Thank you," he whispered, his gratitude overshadowed by the raw emotion surging through him.

Watching your hand move delicately over him, he couldn't help but feel the intense mix of shame and ecstasy coursing through his veins.

You steeled yourself against the stirrings of guilt, focusing solely on the task at hand. The water continued to pour over you both, serving as a constant reminder of the fragility of your situation.

As Mike's breath hitched and his eyes rolled back in bliss, you found yourself lost in the dichotomy of his emotions: the gratitude, the shame, and the overwhelming need for connection.

You opened your eyes, catching sight of Mike biting down on his fist, a futile attempt to silence his cries of pleasure. A small, involuntary chuckle escaped you, the sound carrying a hint of tension.

“You can make sounds, it's okay," you reassured him, a tender smile tugging at the corners of your lips. Closing your eyes once more, you hoped that the vivid imagery of their current predicament wouldn't scar your memories.

But the sight of Mike's flushed skin, his eyes tight shut in ecstasy, and the pink length curved around your hand was enough to dispel any remaining reservations. To your surprise, your grip tightened around him, your movements becoming more assured, more passionate. The water continued to fall, oblivious to the shift in dynamics between you both.

"Fuck!" Mike groaned, gripping your wrist and urging you to increase your pace. His gratitude shone brightly in his eyes as he spoke. "Thank you."

Nodding in agreement, you positioned yourself between his legs, the steamy environment providing little privacy in this intimate encounter.

Mike's head shook slightly, his eyes cast downward in a display of vulnerability. "You don't have to do this, It's okay." His voice trembled, tinged with shyness.

A smirk played across your lips. "Be a good boy and take what I give you," you instructed playfully, wrapping your hand around him once more. Your tongue danced around his tip, drawing a startled whimper from him.

"I'll be a good boy! I'll be a good boy!" he cried out, his words punctuated by gasps of pleasure.

His moans filled the bathroom, a testament to the newfound intimacy that had consumed you.

As you continued, the boundaries between friends and lovers blurred, leaving no room for regret or hesitation. Every touch, every movement was driven by an unspoken understanding, born of necessity and longing.

This time, you engulfed him fully, relishing in the way his body shuddered under your touch. It seemed as if he teetered on the edge of release, his cries growing louder and more fervent.

His hand reached back, gently guiding your head to him, a combination of shyness and desperation etched in his expression. Over time, his grip tightened, urging you to accept more of him, hungry for the sensation.

Your heart raced, the consequences of your actions weighing heavily on your mind. But the hunger in his eyes, the pleading earnestness in his touch, made it difficult to resist.

"You take me so good..." Mike murmured, locking gazes with you as he succumbed further to his desire. His appreciation was palpable, the praise you offered striking a chord in his soul.

In response, you slowed your movements, meeting his eyes as you whispered, "And you feel so good in my mouth." The compliment sparked a blush and a small, grateful smile on his face. Praise – an elixir for his wounded heart.

The water continued to rain down on you both, rendering the bathroom a sacred chamber of vulnerable admissions and simmering passions. In this cramped space, the two of you were stripped bare, submerged in a maelstrom of shifting emotions and escalating pleasures. The boundary between friend and lover had vanished, replaced by a new territory where your instincts governed your actions.

Mike's breathing quickened, the anticipation of release building within him. And though you knew this moment was fraught with consequence, there was an undeniable pull toward the ecstasy that lay just beyond the horizon.

"Can I...?" Mike stammered, his voice trembling and hoarse. After collecting himself, he asked hesitantly, "Can I come on your face or, your body?"

"You're close?" you inquired, unable to hide the curiosity from your tone.

"Yeah, I couldn't last that long with you... you know," he admitted, flustered. Taking a deep breath, he hastily added, "Sorry, I wanted to last longer." Embarrassment colored his features, but his eyes beseeched you to understand.

Mike's apology lingered in the air, but you dismissed it with a gentle wave of your hand, recognizing the power of your connection. Despite the enormity of what was happening between you, the bond that once existed seemed to transform, adapting to the new landscape of emotions and desires.

His release drew near, every twitch and moan drawing you closer to the precipice. The water continued to pour, its relentless cadence echoing the intensity of the situation. And while the implications of your actions weighed heavily on your mind, the thrall of the present moment beckoned you, the two of you locked in an intricate dance of surrender and acceptance.

Finally, Mike released a strained cry, using the last of his strength to guide his release onto your face. It painted your skin, marking you with the evidence of his passion, only to be washed away by the endless stream of water. In that brief moment of shared ecstasy, the room seemed to hold its breath, waiting for the outcome.

Then, without warning, Mike hauled you in for a kiss – a desperate, yearning embrace that had years of suppressed feelings woven into it. His lips pressed against yours, a testament to the depth of your connection. The water continued its steady descent, but you barely noticed as you were consumed by the weight of the moment.

As the echo of Mike's cry faded, you found yourselves frozen in the aftermath, clinging to each other like shipwrecked sailors finding solid ground. The reality of your actions bore down on you, a stark reminder of the journey you had just embarked upon. Yet amid the chaos, there was a strange sense of calm, the two of you buoyed by the shared experience that would forever bind you together.

Mike reached for the loofah hanging on the wall, extending it to you between gasps for air.

"You didn't do my back right," he panted, half-joking.

Rolling your eyes, you rose to your feet, a soft chuckle escaping you. "Asshole," you muttered, taking the loofah and moving behind him. As you carefully scrubbed his back, you couldn't help but study the contours, each mole a tiny piece of art etched onto his skin.

"We seriously need to find you a partner or a sneaky link," you sighed, the gravity of your recent exchange weighing heavily on your mind.

"Or maybe a friend with benefits?" Mike countered, glancing at you from the corner of his eye.

You considered his suggestion briefly, a faint smile playing on your lips. "Maybe," you agreed, the idea hovering between laughter and contemplation.

The water continued to flow, washing away the remnants of your uncertainty and hesitation. The room felt charged with the knowledge of what had transpired, yet there was a strange comfort in the weight of it all. Your hands moved gently over his back, the loofah a buffer between the new reality and the old normalcy.

my dumbass forgot the taglist bro: @freak-accident419 @joshhutchersonsgf @valreanakuroo @cassiecasluciluce @jhutchismyl0verb0y

#wrote this in one sitting and didn’t even revise it sooo yk #mike schmidt #mike schmidt x you #mike schmidt fanfic #mike schmidt x reader #mike schmidt angst #mike fnaf #mike schmidt fnaf #mike schimdt x reader #mike schimdt smut #mike schmidt smut #mike schimdt x you #mike schmidt x y/n #mike schmidt x gn!reader #mike schmidt x male reader #mike schmidt x fem!reader smut

286 notes · View notes

bits-and-babs · 1 year

Text

✦ 𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄 ✦

– KINKTOBER DAY 10: ROLEPLAY

captain john price x reader | smut, 18+ | 1.0k words

summary: rocked by the deployment of your husband, you strike up an unlikely supportive relationship with a captain at his base...

cw: f!reader. cheating, consistent references to the reader's husband, star-crossed lovers vibes, fingering (?), supportive and mild dirty talk, p in v sex mention.

⇽ KINKTOBER MLIST | DAY 11: BREEDING KINK ⇾

You don’t mean to rely on Captain Price so much during your husband’s deployment. Complete mischance. As though you’d tripped and fell into his office– However, it also feels inescapable.

Written in the stars that you would happen to find him that day.

Tear stricken, burdened with the grief of struggling to maintain a healthy lifestyle since your husband flew out to Urzikstan. The weeks without contact, persistent distress without certainty that he was alive– it was all unbearable.

When Price had found you practically prostrating yourself before the barracks in a desperate attempt to petition for some news about your husband’s condition, you were certain he’d throw you off the grounds. When he’d taken you into his arms, informing you he wasn’t at liberty to divulge such sensitive information, you’d been thankful for the kindness he’d offered. Compassionate eyes tracing your face as he gently wiped your tears away with combat-marred palms, John had eased the ache that had been burdening you since deployment day.

You try to convince yourself it isn’t often… But in truth you find yourself visiting every day.

Find the length of time he holds your hands to comfort you extend far past what was reasonable. He laces your fingers together, warming the outside of your wedding band, and squeezing gently in a silent acknowledgement of your loneliness… Even if it was beginning to feel a whole lot less isolating with him.

Find yourself touching him more. You reach to fix his collar when you leave, playfully reminding him that he needed to keep his uniform straight. Picking fluff from his shoulder, straightening that ridiculous hat he always wore. Any excuse to find a way to hold him, to feel that warmth.

Soon, you find yourself relying on him to fill the void of the bed that your husband's deployment had left behind. Inevitable. Those comforting eyes, the ever present physical comfort John offered you– It felt natural to want to feel that beneath bed sheets, to feel the warmth of his kisses elsewhere than your lips. It’s constant, night after night. Soon he stops knocking on the door and lets himself in, stops asking where to find a glass to give you some water. It’s familiar, domestic even. It’s guilt-inducing.

The scratch of John’s beard between your thighs feels like penance for this cardinal sin. You assumed the scratches you’d gouged into his back had the same effect when he stood in the shower following your trysts. A painful reminder of your husband in Urzikstan, unwitting to his wife’s disloyalty. Her desperation.

Truthfully, you wish the shame was enough to stop, to call off this affair and refocus your affections. It wasn’t.

“John,” You whimper as he presses his thumb into your spit soaked clit, pressing slow, messy kisses to the bare skin of your hip. He’s deliberate, circling the swollen nerves with the pinpoint precision bestowed upon an expert marksman. When your hips stutter upwards, seeking more friction, you feel the enamel of his teeth against your hip bone, a small smile pulling on his lips.

“Yes, Love?” His answer is drawn out, voice husky, and it makes the walls of your pussy clench desperately. When you glance to him, his sapphire irises remain trained on the looseness of your jaw, the shapes your lips make when he drags his thumbprint jussst right–

“Oh my god,” you breathe, squeezing your eyes shut when he presses another tender, almost loving kiss to your stomach, his beard scraping your skin. Like flint striking stone, sparks skitter along your nerves, fizzling across synapses. “Fuck fu– don’t stop–”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” John’s tongue traces over the dip of your public bone, barely missing your clit and nearly reducing you to tears with how you want to kiss him– to tell him how hopelessly you love him. It’s twisted and fucked up and utterly deplorable but, oh, you love him. The tingling bliss at your clit pinpoints, and your eyes squeeze closed, your eyebrows pulling in, “Yeah, is that it? Come on, Love, That’s it. That’s it.”

He tightens the circles he’s drawing on your throbbing clit, moving his thumb faster to close in on his target and relishing in the writhing of your body, the heaviness of your breathing and the tightness of your fingers in his cropped hair. You rock your hips to match his, your own pace stuttering as your arousal arcs violently.

Your walls squeeze around nothing, the tightly drawn circles rubbing against your clit practically snapping you in half with the force of your orgasm. It spiders through your limbs, prickling heat forcing your back from the mattress with a wail of John’s name. He kisses at your skin throughout the devastating flood of hormones, murmuring gentle encouragement.

“That’s it, Love. So good for me.”

You can’t deny it anymore, can’t refute the indisputable. You love him– utterly adore the man that practically lays himself at your feet in order to brighten your day. Given the bemused expressions his team would give him when you exited his office, you’d guessed such effort was abnormal for him. Reserved only for you– even if he knew you could never offer him the same unconditional affection.

Glancing to your rings, wedding band and diamond engagement ring strewn haphazardly across the bedside table, the threat of tears prickles your eyes.

“Hey,” you hear John mumble softly, his beard scraping your skin as he pressed gentle, loving kisses against your cheekbone, “Where’re you going? Need you here with me, Love.”

Closing your eyes for just a moment, you rid your mind of your husband. Shove the memory of him into a box in the far corner of your mind as you cradle the face of the man you love, offering him a gentle smile when you look into the sapphire of his irises.

“I’m here,” you murmur.

“Good,” he mumbles back, the edges of his eyes crinkling when you let out a soft gap, the head of his cock gently pushing inside of your slick pussy.

cod mwii/kinktober taglist:

@mockerycrow @bubuslutty @cheezitwh0re @haunt3dh3art @levi-llama @thebiscuitsheep @maelstrom007 @alexxavicry @bug-sy-boy @glennrheesworld @kittenfrostt @luvfromkat @blingblong55 @whore4dilfs @wolfyland07 @doggydale @dog55teeth @cabreezer0117 @cathnoneofyourbusiness @marygraceee @thatchickwiththecamera @legend-o-zelda @whore-for-anime @i-love-ghost @cyberpr1m3 @mockerycrow @bubuslutty @lundenloves @cheezitwh0re @haunt3dh3art @babychoi03 @infectedkura @allekat1988 @whore-for-anime @soupbinsoup @passi0np1t @mockerycrow @cyberpr1m3 @i-love-ghost @allekat1988 @infectedkura @babychoi03 @freakquenci @maviee @yunggoblin @sleepystaarr @watyousayin @soupbinsoup @passi0np1t @damn-dean-blog @pheonyxmoon @magicalreviewphantom @limegreenbabx @johfaam0 @iaur @justsayk

@bloodmoon-bites @wiltedwonderland @doggydale @limegreenbabx @namelesshumanperson @ninahhh-brahh @km-ffluv @decaffeinateddinosauronearth @domaniquessidehoe2 @arrozyfrijoles23 @amisouki @sleepysheepsstuff @chunguk @lundenloves @marylovesdilfs @ninahhh-brahh @namelesshumanperson @limegreenbabx @doggydale @wiltedwonderland @justsayk @pennachilles @harrypotter-loveboat @skeleton-island

@mortallyuniquepeach @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @crybaby-blue-blog @heart-atttack @pansa-1-san @maviee @emotion-no-hot-yes-hotel-trivago @s-u-t @ghostslynx @solidly-indulgent @glitterypirateduck @gummyfang @bii-aan-ckaa @konigsblog @crissteetee

556 notes · View notes

ssivinee · 1 year

Text

✧Mindless✧

Part 1 | Part 2

BEBE! Bada Lee x F Reader x WOLF'LO Haechi Wang: Bada is a wreck after you leave, but you return after 5 months, thriving in life. But will history repeat itself, or do you finally get a happy ending?

Word Count: 13k

TW: Slight self-harm, a tad bit of dark humor, talks about bad coping habits, alcohol, and minor substances…this shit is lowkey toxic so pls keep that in mind

Note: NOW THIS IS THE LONGEST FIC IVE WROTE. I was struggling, ya'll like... this fic was literally beating my ass ngl. Also very much NOT proof read so🫡

Character Vision Board

During the five months you were gone, Bada's life took a turn. The emptiness you left behind seemed to grow with each passing day, and Bada's coping mechanisms gradually evolved into destructive habits that affected both herself and those in her vicinity.

She had turned to partying as a way to seek comfort in the late-night thrills of the bustling nightlife. The party's vibrant pulse, illuminated by the bewitching effects of flashing lights, offered a getaway from the burdens that had weighed heavily on her heart. The pounding music reverberated through the very core of her being, and the crowded venue seemed to come alive with a symphony of rhythm and laughter.

In the midst of the party, surrounded by a sea of euphoric faces, she found a temporary sanctuary from the guilt and loneliness that had taken up residence in her thoughts. The mesmerizing allure of the night, with its vibrant hues and ever-changing moods, offered a hypnotic diversion from the shadows of her mind.

Bada had always been known for her confident and charismatic demeanor, and it didn't take long for her magnetic presence to draw people toward her. Her laughter and animated conversations became a magnet, attracting friends and acquaintances who reveled in her engaging company. It was in these moments, under the neon glow of the dance floor, that she felt the warmth of human connection, a fleeting escape from her inner demons.

As the weeks passed, these gatherings became integral to her life. She eagerly embraced the nightlife almost every week, embracing its vibrant chaos as a temporary reprieve. The party had become a form of therapy, a way to momentarily set aside the harsh realities that lingered in the corners of her mind. Each night was a journey into the unknown, a whirlwind of emotions and experiences that helped her navigate the complexities of her own heart.

In her search for distraction, Bada played around with other girls more than before. Every day was someone new, and now, rather than having restraint, Bada’s actions became much more lewd. There were times students found the girl making out with someone in the cleaning closets, basically fucking someone in a bathroom stall, or even just daringly flirting with multiple people at once. She has always had a reputation as a player, and her charm seemed to work effortlessly despite her looming issues.

Her transformation extended even to her role as a team leader. Bada's once compassionate and encouraging approach had given way to a more unyielding demeanor. She drove her team relentlessly, pushing them beyond their limits, her singular focus on anything but the troubling discomfort of longing that constantly haunted her thoughts.

Previously known for her unwavering dedication and passionate presence on the court, her leadership had evolved into a coping mechanism. During practice, her commands took on a sharper edge. "Come on, you guys! This isn't kindergarten; we need to get serious!" she'd bark, her words laced with an intensity that surprised her teammates.

Haechi, the team's co-captain and a close friend decided to address the issue after an especially grueling practice. She knew the actual reason behind Bada's changed behavior, but the team dynamics were profoundly impacted, and Haechi wasn't sure if it was her place to intervene. The situation was complicated because she was also personally involved and intimately understood the extent of everything.

Haechi approached Bada, her concern evident in her gaze. "Bada, you've been really hard on us lately. What's going on?" Bada's expression hardened as she grappled with her facade, struggling to keep her emotions at bay. "We need to win. I can't have any weak links on this team."

Haechi exchanged worried glances with the others. They sensed that Bada's intensity was driven by something far deeper than just the desire to win games, and it left them with a nagging sense of unease as they continued to practice under their unrelenting captain's leadership.

But each new fling, party, and quarrel only served as a fleeting distraction, never filling the void you had left behind.

There were late nights when she was alone in her room, and Bada would suffer about the facts. She missed you terribly. She missed your laughter, conversations, and the warmth you brought into her life. She yearned for the comfort and companionship of your friendship. As she lay in the darkness, the pain of her betrayal weighed heavily on her conscience. ‘I hurt the one person who truly cared about me. Am I just that stupid?’ she would silently admit.

These moments of reflection ate away at her, and she couldn't help but wonder how different things might have been if she hadn't let her fear and insecurities drive a wedge between you two.

Bada appeared on a desperate quest to bury the pain that still raced through her heart. With every beat, she felt the gaping void left by the absence of the most vital person in her life. No amount of parties, casual flings, or wild distractions could fill the vast emptiness that you had once occupied.

In the quietest hours of the night, when the world was still, and her thoughts were loud, she found herself secretly yearning for your return. She harbored a genuine hope, wishing for a chance to mend the bridges she had inadvertently burned.

Amid the crisis of losing you, Bada left no stone unturned in her quest for any trace of your existence. She scoured social media platforms, meticulously searching pages and timelines for the smallest updates or any signs of your life. Every ping of a notification filled her with a blend of hope and dread.

She texted your number, pouring her heart into each word, desperately longing for a response. The silent void on the other end of the line only deepened her despair, leaving her grappling with your absence's stark reality.

Currently, Bada couldn't claim that she was doing any better. The pain persisted, but she was perhaps a touch more subdued than she had been in the turbulent months that had preceded this moment. She carried the weight of longing and loss, hoping for a glimmer of change in her circumstances.

The Past 5 Months

Bada was spiraling out of control. Despite her attempts to cope with your absence through partying and casual encounters, her world was slowly unraveling. The parties had become a regular getaway. Late nights turned into early mornings filled with pure adrenaline and blackouts. It was all a blur, a haze that she thought helped heal her pain but left her feeling emptier each time she woke up.

She especially enjoyed Noze’s parties, though, one of the few friends who enjoyed this new version of her. Noze ensured Bada enjoyed every night, letting her drink several liquor bottles, familiarizing Bada with weed, and introducing new girls to her. But, as one friend condoned the changes, the other three started worrying about their friend.

"Bada, maybe you should consider slowing down with the parties," Lee Jung gently suggested, concerned for her friend's well-being. The suggestion arose from the remnants of a bet they had made together, which had unintentionally caused a heated argument within their close-knit friend group.

In the aftermath of the dispute, Bada had initially pointed fingers and placed blame on her friends, especially Lee Jung, for an entire month. However, deep down, she couldn't maintain her anger. She recognized that her resentment toward them was irrational, as she was equally at fault for the situation.

Following the resolution of the argument, Bada's demeanor began to take a more concerning turn. Her attitude deteriorated, and she became increasingly prone to conflicts and confrontations. She seemed to lash out at anyone she deemed inferior or who challenged her in any way. The charming charisma she once exuded had now given way to an intimidating aura that, paradoxically, seemed to repel people while simultaneously drawing them in. It was as if the inner turmoil she had been grappling with was spilling over into her interactions with others, casting a shadow on her once-magnetic presence. The turmoil was like a cloud that had descended upon her, tainting the dynamics of her friendships and her personal life.

The fights were always something small that triggered the tall girl. An example of this was on a random afternoon in the university courtyard, where students gathered to relax, study, or socialize. Bada Lee, was sitting at an outdoor table, poring over her textbooks, trying to concentrate on her studies.

As she engrossed herself in her phone, a student from a nearby table accidentally bumped into her chair while walking past. The minor collision sent her drink rolling off the table and onto the ground. Irritated, Bada muttered under her breath, "Watch where you're going, you klutz."

The student, a young man with an apologetic expression, turned and said, "I'm really sorry about that. It was an accident."

Bada, however, was in no mood to accept an apology. Her hot-headedness had been consuming her patience, and she snapped back, "Accident or not, you should be more careful! My stuff is important, and now I have to pick up my pen because of your clumsiness."

The exchange had caught the attention of nearby students, who were now watching the situation unfold. The student, taken aback by Bada's harsh words, knelt to pick up the bottled drink and handed it to her, saying, "I said I was sorry. You didn't have to be so rude about it." Bada's temper flared. She aggressively snatched the drink from the boy’s hand and retorted, "Well, maybe if you were paying attention, you wouldn't keep causing problems for others!" She tells him as her pointer and middle finger jabbed continuously on his shoulder.

The pressure in the courtyard grew as other students exchanged uneasy glances. The situation escalated further as the young man, frustrated with Bada's attitude, replied, "I apologized, and I tried to help. You need to work on your manners." Bada's face reddened with anger. She pushed her books aside and stood up abruptly, causing her chair to screech loudly across the courtyard. "You have a lot of nerve, talking to me like that," she hissed.

The situation had escalated into an unnecessary confrontation, with both students locked in a heated exchange, their voices rising as they continued to argue. Bada's hot-headed attitude had once again ignited an incident, leaving the courtyard filled with an uncomfortable tension.

Even the bond between Bada and her parents had taken a sharp downturn, despite already not having the best relationship with them.That time of her life had become a persistent strain that weighed heavily on their family life.

Bada had moments where she believed she was making progress, her determination shining through, but these fleeting glimpses of improvement couldn't dispel the ongoing tension that seemed to permeate their household. The atmosphere was saturated with unresolved conflicts and unspoken words, casting a shadow over what was once a warm and harmonious home.

Bada's behavior had become increasingly reckless, mirroring her inner turmoil and frustrations. This recklessness was like a quiet storm, slowly but surely eroding the fragile remnants of understanding that had been left between her and her parents. They were beginning to contemplate a difficult decision, one that had seemed unimaginable before the possibility of sending her away in an attempt to restore peace and find a solution to the growing discord within their family.

As for her interactions with other girls, they had become a simple distraction, like they originally were. Bada had always been known as a player, but now it was as if she was desperately searching for someone to help her heal. She sought comfort in others' company but found none, just an easy quickie to get away, even for a moment.

In the days following your departure, Bada made genuine attempts to focus on her studies. She recognized the importance of maintaining her grades, but being separated from you posed a significant challenge. At times, she found herself gazing at her textbooks, her mind drifting back to the memories of your study sessions and shared laughter.

One day, unable to bear the weight of her emotions any longer, Bada decided to text you. She had thought long and hard about what to say, her fingers hesitating over the keyboard. Finally, she just goes for it.

Bada Hey, it's Bada. I know I messed up. I miss you. Everything's been messing with my head.

But as the hours passed without a response from you, Bada felt her resolve waver. She thought, ‘Maybe I can't fix this,’ and gave in to her old school habits, falling back into familiar behavior patterns.

The days turned into weeks, and Bada's life continued to spiral. She had lost her way, and there was a growing sense of desperation in her actions. She longed for a chance to make amends, to rebuild the friendship she had thoughtlessly destroyed. But as time marched on, she couldn't help but wonder if it was too late to find her way back to the person she used to be.

After 5 Months

Bada's friends gathered around a cafeteria table, the lively buzz of their fellow students providing the background noise. Bada herself was engrossed in messaging a casual acquaintance, and her friends munched on snacks while discussing their upcoming schedules.

"Dude, next week's soccer game is about to kick our asses. The other team's record is still 13-0, like how do we even beat that?" Aiki groaned, capturing everyone's attention.

Emma responded with a nonchalant shrug, and Noze tapped her shoulder beside Lee Jung. "What about Bada’s basketball game next week?"

While all this unfolded, Bada remained busy in the bathroom with another girl, completely oblivious to what had transpired. Noze was about to turn to Lee Jung to discuss an impending assignment when her attention abruptly shifted to the entrance, where three unfamiliar girls entered with unwavering confidence.

Aiki's astonishment caught everyone's interest, and they looked up to see the three girls striding in with remarkable self-assurance.

As she left the restroom, her hair and clothes disheveled, she witnessed an unexpected sight. Her eyes widened in shock as she caught sight of the three of you. Overwhelmed, she whispered your name, staring at your transformed appearance. "Y/n?" Bada murmured to herself, her eyes locked on you. Noze hurried over to Bada, commenting, "Dude, they’re so fine, especially the one in the middle." Bada was too stunned to reply as she watched you three walk deeper into the cafeteria.

You returned to Korea with Aeri and Yunjin in tow. It was your decision because the American girls believed the school would be a great fit for them, and they were planning to move back to Korea. Little did you know this new trio would change things and create a strong force.

Together, you, Aeri, and Yunjin formed a unique bond even while still in the States. You were like a powerhouse trio, supporting and challenging each other in ways that brought out the best in everyone. Your friendship had strengthened during your time abroad, and now, you were ready to face new challenges at your old school. These girls became your rock while you had to work through your grueling internship, and they even helped you with this new version of yourself. The girls wanted to upgrade your wardrobe, enhance your confidence, and help with a new style of makeup.

And god, did it make you look even more stunning than Bada remembered.

Stepping onto the bustling campus, you couldn't help but notice the sneaking glances and hushed whispers from Bada's circle of friends. They had undeniably heard about how the bet had concluded, though the full extent of the details remained a mystery to them. Their curiosity grew as they observed your confident demeanor, even though your identity remained a puzzle.

Yet, what struck Bada the most was the remarkable transformation in your appearance. Your once raven-black hair had morphed into a striking shade of blood-red, a bold statement that spoke of change. Your choice of clothing had evolved as well, embracing a more revealing style that mirrored a newfound confidence. This transformation left Bada in awe; she had anticipated changes, but the extent of it was astonishing.

At first, Bada harbored a glimmer of hope about mending the rift between you two, but her optimism waned as she observed your interaction with Haechi. A bright smile and a warm hug welcomed Haechi, revealing the depth of your connection. As you introduced Haechi to your friends, it became apparent that she held a significant place in your life during your time away. Deep down, a twinge of jealousy tugged at Bada's heart, though she tried to bury the feeling beneath a veneer of composure.

You walked into the English classroom alone, the absence of Aeri and Yunjin making you feel somewhat vulnerable amidst the sea of unfamiliar faces. The start of the new semester had brought about an unexpected twist of fate as it placed you, Bada, and Haechi in the same class. This class, in particular, was known for its emphasis on discussion and interaction, making it clear that interactions were about to become an inevitable part of your academic routine. The universe seemed to conspire to bring you all together once more, forcing you to confront the past and navigate the complexities of your shared history.

The atmosphere in the room was palpable, heavy with unspoken tensions. Bada's friends cast cautious glances in your direction, their expressions mixing curiosity and sympathy for their friend. As for you, the mere sight of Bada back in your life once more stirred a whirlwind of emotions within you. Her pleading gaze met yours, and in response, you turned your eyes away with a subtle scoff, a barrier between your feelings and the present moment.

Haechi, seated beside an empty chair, motioned for you to join her. She extended a warm smile and offered you a cup of coffee, a comforting gesture that eased some of the room's tension. "Thanks, Haechi," you said, taking the coffee and settling into the seat beside her. She responded with a gentle pat on your thigh, her concern evident in her gaze. "You okay?" Haechi asked, her voice laced with genuine care. You met her gaze, offering a reassuring but restrained smile. "I'm good, don't worry about it, okay?" Haechi fell into a thoughtful silence, her fingers brushing your arm gently. "Let me know if you ever need anything. You know I'm always here for you," she offered, her sincerity shining through. Encouraged by her words, you ran your fingers through her hair, your lips curving softly. "I know, Haechi."

Throughout the interaction, Bada observed in silence, fueled with mixed emotions. She knew she had no right to be angry, yet an undeniable sense of jealousy crept into her heart as she watched you stare at Haechi with eyes of care. While you were away, Bada and Haechi remained cordial, never bringing up you or the day you left, but that hindered the way they worked on the court and even as friends. Haechi got much more secretive, and Bada never knew why.

Yes, they had a falling out, and Bada knew their friendship wouldn’t be the same as before, but this drastic change caught her off guard. Unbeknownst to Bada, Haechi was hiding the fact that she had been keeping up with you on social media, even chatting with you often, even in completely different time zones. Haechi had seen the new friends who had entered your life, especially Yunjin and Aeri, who seemed to be helping you navigate the tough times. She knew of your progress and the support system you had built, but she had chosen not to share this information with Bada, especially seeing how Bada had relapsed because of the situation.

The professor introduced you to the class since you joined a bit late. "Our next unit is about writing on feelings. It's a broad topic. I'll go around, and when I point at you, share what you'd write about based on your current feelings and why." He pointed at random students; most mentioned common emotions like happiness or stress.

The atmosphere in the classroom shifted when it was Haechi's turn to respond. The professor's question hung in the air, waiting to be answered. "What about you, Miss Wang? How are you feeling right now?" Haechi paused for a moment, a thoughtful look in her eyes. "I'd say it's as simple as being... in love?"

Her words caught both Bada and you by surprise. An unspoken curiosity lingered in the room, leaving everyone to wonder: Who was she in love with?

The professor noted her hesitation and probed further, "You don't seem entirely sure, Miss Wang." Haechi chuckled softly. "I said it's simple, but it's not quite there yet."

He continued, "So, a crush?" Haechi nodded, her gaze drifting toward you as you busily responded to messages on your phone. The professor moved on to the next student.

"Miss Lee, how about you?" Bada fidgeted nervously with her hands, the unease evident in her expression. Sharing her feelings in front of the class was an intimidating prospect. "Regret," she mumbled, glancing at you as she spoke. Her friends offered silent support, patting her back, understanding that Bada was navigating her own unique journey of coping with pain.

"Why regret?" the professor inquired.

"I messed up," Bada admitted straightforwardly, giving a quick, almost reassuring nod as if she needed to affirm her words. A moment of silence followed before the professor decided to move on to the next student. "Miss Baek?"

Your head shot up, and you hesitated, keenly aware of the emotional weight of the responses that had come before yours. "Maybe 'endeavoring'?" you suggested, your voice quivering slightly. The professor encouraged you to elaborate, and you fidgeted uncomfortably in your seat as you opened up.

"I'm trying hard to become a newer and better version of myself. A version that's less naive," you confessed, revealing your vulnerability. Your response hung in the air, leaving you feeling exposed as you anticipated the inevitable questions and curiosity surrounding your pursuit of self-improvement.

In the following group discussions and class activities, you, Bada, and Haechi found yourselves being forced to engage with each other at certain times. The moments were filled with silent tension, unspoken words, and lingering gazes hinting at your unresolved feelings.

It was strange to you. You weren’t unaware of emotions and how they worked, but you should’ve been raging at the girl, even if she tried apologizing. Yet there was no denying the complicated web of emotions surrounding you and Bada. The past couldn't be erased, and the future remained uncertain, but one thing was clear: your reunion had brought new challenges into your lives. It left Bada wondering if there was still a chance for her to make amends and rebuild the friendship she had so thoughtlessly shattered, but she had to find a way to make it up to you.

Even if it was just for the sake of her own mental.

In the weeks following your return, Bada couldn’t find any chance to be near you. At least you didn’t give her the chance to. If you were with your friends, you’d stray away from them. If you were with Haechi, you acted cuddly and somewhat flirtatious with her. If you were in class, you focused on every assignment. So Bada felt like she couldn’t butt in anywhere.

Bada did discover something she wasn’t too happy about. Haechi had been in contact with you while you were away, something Bada had not expected. She overheard her co-captain speaking to other girls on the team, as they seemed interested in your friendship. “So you're telling me, Baek Y/n, was the top student? The one who sat in the back of class and always wore a mask and hoodie?” Haechi nods at the question. “We just texted and called a lot while she was gone. I wanted to make sure she was okay, you know?” Jealousy gnawed at Bada as she wondered about the nature of your conversations and the connection that had persisted between you and Haechi.

You sat on a garden bench on a regular Thursday evening, chatting with Aeri and Yunjin. The conversation revolved around some gossip about friends back in the States. Aeri, still engrossed in her phone, asked, "Did Sarah spill the beans about her boyfriend?" Her eyes remained glued to her phone screen as she typed away.

Both you and Yunjin exchanged knowing glances, sensing some juicy details were about to be revealed. Without hesitation, you and Yunjin pulled out your own phones and began frantically scrolling through social media, eager to uncover the latest scoop. Yunjin chimed in, playfully groaning, "Well, can you tell us while we look? You're making us curious." Aeri observed the two of you with a smirk, "You two are like detectives when it comes to gossip."

Aeri revealed, "She said she found him hooking up with one of the girls from her group project." Her revelation earned a collective scoff from you and Yunjin. "Some people are just pigs," you grumbled, clearly not impressed by Sarah's boyfriend's behavior. The other girls nodded in agreement, sensing your irritation and not pressing further on your personal tone.

Just then, Haechi made her way to your group, catching you in the midst of your gossip and relaxation. "Hello, ladies," she greeted, waving at all three of you, though her eyes lingered on you a bit longer. You welcomed her with a warm hug, "What’s up?"

Haechi smiled and replied, "I was actually looking for you guys. I’m hosting a party tomorrow at my family’s townhouse and was hoping you three would come?" Her hopeful eyes rested on all of you, but the emphasis seemed to be on you.

You gladly accepted her invitation, "Of course, Haech. Just send me the details."

As you confirmed your attendance, she swiftly took out her phone to share the information. "I’ll see you later in class, alright?" You nodded as Haechi exited, and as she walked away, Aeri couldn't contain her excitement. She playfully shook your shoulders, causing you to laugh. "She’s so into you, girl."

Yunjin chuckled at the interaction and said, "Yeah, it's pretty obvious." You couldn't help but roll your eyes at their teasing, a subtle smile gracing your lips. "Oh, come on, you two. She's just being friendly." Aeri and Yunjin exchanged knowing glances before bursting into laughter, clearly not buying your innocent act.

The next day, the three of you prepared for the party in your cozy apartment. The morning sun streamed through the curtains, casting a warm glow on the room. The sound of upbeat music reverberated through the space, filling the entire house with an infectious energy.

As you and your friends got ready, the atmosphere was charged with excitement. You stood in front of the open closet, selecting from several outfits that were carefully hung and arranged by color and style. After trying on a few options, you settled on a simple yet stunning black dress. It was made mostly of mesh, which added an alluring and stylish touch to your ensemble. The dress clung to your curves in just the right places, making you feel confident and radiant.

Aeri, the makeup enthusiast of the group, took charge of your makeup. She wouldn't stop pestering you until you reluctantly agreed to let her work her magic. As she skillfully applied makeup, you couldn't help but glance at your reflection in the mirror. You had to admit, she had transformed your look, enhancing your features and giving you a sultry, glamorous appeal. It was a look that could turn heads and make a lasting impression.

With your hair styled and makeup perfected, you felt ready to take on the night. Once you were all dressed and glamorously prepared, you left the apartment, the pounding music fading behind you.

Arriving at Haechi's large townhouse, you were met with an electric atmosphere. The lights and music created an ambiance of celebration, and the chatter of excited partygoers filled the air. You took out your phone and texted Haechi to let her know that you had arrived. In no time, she responded, instructing you to head to the pool area where she and her friends were hanging out. The anticipation in the air was notable, and you were more than ready to join the party.

Navigating through the sweaty, inebriated bodies in the crowded house, Bada's sharp eyes caught a glimpse of your fiery red hair. The instant she spotted you, her heart leaped, and an overwhelming desire to be by your side surged within her. However, the maze of partygoers and the deafening music made it nearly impossible for her to pinpoint the perfect moment to approach you.

As you, Aeri, and Yunjin finally made your way to the backyard, transitioning from the bustling house to the open air was a breath of fresh relief. The chaotic, pulsating energy of the indoor party gave way to a serene yet lively outdoor setting. The atmosphere was alive with laughter, chatter, and the glistening reflections of the pool.

Your eyes quickly sought out Haechi's figure, who was seated by the poolside, surrounded by familiar classmates and friends who were engaged in animated conversations. Her presence exuded a tempting charm, drawing you in like a bee to honey.

When she sensed your gaze, the tension between you and Haechi was palpable, thickening the air around you. Her teeth tugged seductively on her lips, and her captivating gaze remained unwaveringly fixed on your body. Haechi was clearly reveling in the sight before her, the intensity of her emotions mirrored in her smoldering eyes, creating an electric connection between the two of you.

“I’m glad you could make it,” she tells you, sipping on a red solo cup, likely filled with alcohol. “I wouldn’t miss your party, Haech,” you simply tell her, as your friends already mingled away to the table filled with drinks. “You want anything?”

“Some plain soju would be nice,” she nods at you, pulls you over to the table, and pours you a cup. “You look good, Y/n-nie,” her husky voice almost seemed to purr when complimenting you. A coy smile forms on your lips, your gaze becoming dangerously enticing, “I can say the same thing about you,” you tell her as you take a sip of the soju, feeling your body heating up due to just one taste of the drink.

“I’ve been wanting to ask about the English assignment, by the way?” Your brow raises, “You’re talking about an assignment? During a party?” You giggle at her antics, but her seductive eyes stay on yours, “I was hoping for a private lesson.” You feel the shiver down your back, her voice getting deeper as she continues.

“I’m sure I can help you in some way, too,” you feel your body heating up even more. “We can work something out,” you say as your hand caresses her arm, feeling up the sleeve of her letterman jacket. Haechi was now liking this new feeling you’ve brought upon her, deciding to make a move. The music starts booming on the speakers, and the taller girl smirks at the sound, “Wanna go dance?”

With a sly smile, you returned her reply, "Of course." Navigating your way through the pulsating crowd, the sensual rhythm of the music reverberated through the entire house.

As you and Haechi swayed your bodies in harmony to the seductive beat, an undeniable magnetic pull drew you closer. The atmosphere was charged with noticeable sexual tension as your bodies moved, grinding in a rhythm that left no space between you. The vibration from the speakers had the two of you feeling the dizziness from the heated moment. Haechi's long arms enveloped your hips in a firm, possessive embrace. Her fingers, gripping strong, found their place on your thighs, the touch being electrifying, signaling anticipation from you.

The chemistry between you two was igniting a fire that had been fuming beneath the surface for months, leaving bystanders feeling the heat of your connection.

Meanwhile, Bada watched in the corner of the room. She noticed you walking in as Haechi gripped your wrist, visibly feeling disgusted at the sight of you two getting up close and personal. She couldn't help but notice the spark between you and Haechi, and her jealousy was beginning to get the best of her again. In a misguided attempt to put an end to her emotions, she saw the same blonde girl you had found her with that one night after the basketball game. It was wrong, sure, but if anyone learned ANYTHING about Bada - she didn’t know how to control her emotions properly. Bada had pulled the blonde to the dance floor, making sure you could see them as the tall girl’s hands roamed all over her body.

Your eyes met hers for the first time since you got here, and it felt as if your entire world was crumbling again. You wanted to deny the feelings, not try to feel weak, vulnerable, or stupid over the girl, yet you couldn’t help it. Bada may have felt like she was the only one changing, but she was also helping you.

So when you saw the same girl that day, you felt hurt and betrayed again. You almost didn’t even remember Haechi’s presence behind you, only being alerted again as you felt her chest beating. Feeling the weight of Bada’s actions, you tried to escape the dance floor, finding an excuse. “Let me go get a drink and use the bathroom!” You yell over the loud music, and Haechi nods.

You stumbled into the kitchen, grabbing any bottle at hand, pouring a cup to the top, and gulping it down to numb the pain and confusion that had enveloped you. The fiery burn in your chest and the swirling dizziness offered a brief respite from the shit show happening in the other room. Even though you knew it was wrong to punish yourself this way seemingly, your mind whispered that perhaps it was time to let loose, to indulge in a bit of naughtiness, for reasons you weren't entirely sure of. All that mattered in that moment was making this night count, no matter the consequences.

When your mind was made up, you quickly went to the living room, finding Haechi again, leaning on the wall with a clear flush all over her body. ‘She was drunk,’ the thought made your next decision easier.

You pulled her arm to the corner of the room, where a couch could be seen, and pushed her down. Haechi was shocked but relaxed as you straddled her, getting comfortable on your lap. Her eyes travel down to the ends of your dress as it rode up your thighs due to them being spaced out by her legs. She placed her hands under your thighs, keeping you balanced as you leaned closer to her.

Your eyes traveled to her lips as your hand pressed on her waist, “Is it bad if I really wanted to kiss you right now?” You mumble in her ear, nibbling lightly, and Haechi’s mind is going feral at the feeling of your breath tickling her skin. She impulsively pulls your chin with her long fingers, lips crashing down on yours. The feeling of your soft, pouty lips hooked the taller girl as she pulled on your bottom lip, wanting to feel your tongue.

So when you oblige, the swirling of your tongue around hers encourages her to wrap her arms around your waist, bringing you closer as you find your hands banding themselves around the back of her neck. The room was already hot, but sweet began to form as your body heat radiated off each other.

Without breaking the kiss, you take your jacket off swiftly and lay it beside the girl who was now gripping your waist with much force. Bada had seen you leave and knew she was successful, but her face burned in anger when she found your red hair again. She only saw your backside, but she knew what was going on with the way you were positioned and how your head was motioning. “Dude, you're killing the cup,” she heard Aiki point out and looked down to see the discombobulated red solo cup, clear liquor dripping from her fingers. “My bad,” Bada groans, finding a napkin to clean up the mess.

Looking back up, she finds you sitting on Haechi’s lap, now to the side and laughing lightly as the tall girl whispers in your ear.

‘Oh fuck this,’ Bada just walks out of the house, not caring about her friends pleading for her. She couldn’t stand it, yet were you just gonna let her waltz back in and kiss her - it was impossible for it to be that easy. You stayed at the party for a little longer, just chatting away with everyone as Haechi stole a few kisses from you every now and then as you enjoyed the rest of your night.

Amidst the chaos of your complicated relationships with Bada and Haechi, you found solace in shopping with Aeri and Yunjin the next day. The three of you bonded over retail therapy, spilling the tea about your respective love lives and the intricacies of your feelings. So, the topic naturally turned to Bada and Haechi during your shopping spree.

You sat on the bench with Aeri and Yunjin, trying out new clothes as you watched, already buying the clothing you picked out. “So you’re saying you made out with Haechi cause you were jealous of Blondie and Bada?” Yunjin asks, making sure she understands the situation.

“Honestly, so real,” Aeris says, encouraging your choices as usual. “I mean, I’m sure Haechi should’ve expected something like that to happen at a party without so many feelings involved,” Yunjin rationalizes, but it gets you thinking.

Did you like Haechi? Do you still like Bada? Were you over everything Bada did to you? Did the kiss mean anything? Was it just the heat of the moment? You only guessed that time could tell. It hasn’t even been a month since your return, and you already struggled to comprehend things.

Once the two girls notice your silence, Aeri snaps her fingers in front of your face, “Hello? Y/n? Still with us?” You shake your head at the teasing tone, a giggle being pushed out. “I don’t know what to feel right now, honestly,” your voice comes out soft, and the girls realize it is actually serious. “Well, do you like Ms. Wang?” Yunjin, the certified friend psychiatrist of the group, asks you, and you shrug. “I won't deny liking her company. Haechi has been with me through the months of hurt and change,” you pause, and the girls anticipate what's coming next. “But?”

You sigh, “But I can’t get that asshole Bada out of my head.” You share your conflicting emotions and the tangled web of attraction, jealousy, and unresolved history that defined your interactions with the two basketball captains.

“Is it not just physical attraction to you?” Yunjin’s question made you think that you were sure it wasn’t just physical with Bada but you with Haechi, fully knowing that she had become a safe space for you. “I don’t really think either of them are solely physical.” You groan. The thoughts started giving you a brutal headache as you sat on the chair, hanging your head low with your eyes shut.

“I don’t think anyone can blame you, girl. The entire school population loves those two girls, and it's kinda concerning especially since Bada doesn’t have the best track record with women.” Aeri points out, and you scoff, “You’re not wrong, girl, but these girls have always been like that for Bada.” More than ever, it seemed like many were vying for Bada’s attention, and it left you contemplating the complex dynamics of your relationships, now with Haechi in the picture as well. The two captivating and complex girls who had entered your life once more and would most likely cause havoc in your life.

The next week, everything was surprisingly normal. You and Haechi weren’t awkward after the steamy night, but the friendship was sure flirtier than before. Whenever she saw you the entire week, she’d kiss you on the cheek or play with your soft locks. You began to realize that Haechi’s love language was physical touch, but you never knew why it took you so long to think of that. The girl used to hug you every time she said literally hello, so it made sense.

It was now Monday morning, and you were in the cafeteria with Aeri and Yunjin, eating the fresh lunch they got. As you guys ate in peace, Haechi came up to you guys and sat at the table. “Hey, pretty,” she says as you chew your food, and she uses your finger to tilt your head up.

Your doe eyes stared at her as you chewed with chipmunk-like cheeks, and she found you quite adorable. “Haech, the table is used for eating, not your ass,” you joke, and she laughs. “What are you doing here, though? Don’t you usually eat outside in the morning?”

“I had to come early to talk to Miss Kim today, so I decided to stop by and ask you guys if you wanna come to our basketball game at Handong University on Friday?” “Sure, what time?” Haechi checks her phone, “At 5 pm.”

“Do we need tickets though?” Yunjin speaks up, chewing on her food. “Yeah, but don’t worry about it. If you ride with me, you can get the tickets easily and just go in with me.” You nod, “Bet, just text me your plan.”

Haechi takes her leave, and the girls begin staring at you, causing you to look at them in confusion. “What?”

“At this point, you guys should start dating already,” Aeri blurts off, and you almost choke on your food. “I’m not ready for that.” “Not ready for that, or just not with Haechi?” You paused harshly at the statement. No amount of swallowing your saliva could shake that anxious feeling off whenever talking about this question. “I don’t know,” you just roll your eyes.

After breakfast, you had to go to the student council office, still having the role of secretary. Walking into the office, you see the president and vice president talking to Bada. Trying to avoid interaction with the girl, you just walk past her, giving no attention and checking the papers you’d need for this week.

As you skimmed over everything, you began hearing the president's voice to Bada. “I don't want to hear another complaint, Bada. I’ve been doing my best to cover for you so your parents don’t have to hear anything, but this is becoming too much.” Bada huffs at the statement, assuming that you can hear everything. “I’m just saying the paperwork complaints are becoming too much. You can't just leave the school or go home to mess with a girl?”

Hearing those words had your eyes roll hard, quickly wanting to leave the room with your piles of paper. Bada notices the irritation in your face, quickly wanting to follow you, but is being stopped by the other two students.

“We're telling you, Bada, this should be the last one, or else we will report it.” Bada could care less right now, so as they finish talking to her, she runs out of the office, looking in every direction to see if she can catch up to you. She finds you at the end of the left hallway, and her quick, long legs catch up easily.

You, on the other hand, hear the loud footsteps, letting a strong sigh out. “Y/n?” Just hearing her voice - it had your mind in a frenzy. You missed the soothing sound, and it didn’t help turning around to look at her. Due to the height difference, you were now looking up at the girl, her tense face evident as she looked at you. Bada just stood there, not really thinking about her actions.

“Anything you wanna say?” You practically whispered out. Bada was in awe of you; all she could think about was how good you looked. Your pleated red school skirt was paired with plain knee-high socks, and your white collared button-up tucked in yet slightly see-through made Bada go crazy. You weren’t so innocent yourself as you stared at the girl's luscious full lips, feeling the intensity of her stare. “Again, did you wanna say something?”

For some reason, the sorry that was at the tip of her tongue never came out, “You going to our game this week?”

If you were disappointed in the question, Bada wanted to punch herself in the face. All that build-up and tension led to this? You look at her, questioning her in your head, “Yeah, Haechi invited me so…” the silence was deafening as Bada just stood there, her brain trying to configure what to tell you. “I’ll just get going now,” you take your leave, not letting Bada get herself together.

The entire day, you found the interaction so odd. You believed your first encounter with Bada would’ve been filled with anger and raging tears, yet the two of you stood in the middle of that hallway like a deer in headlights. You shake the feeling off and just go about your busy day.

As time flew by, it was already Friday, and you were currently in Haechi’s car, sitting in the passenger seat, while your two best friends sat in the back. As Haechi drove, her hands stayed clasped on your bare thigh, as your skirt didn’t cover much. Not minding the touch, you just kept talking to the girls in the back. “You think there’s gonna be any cuties there?” Aeri questions as she applies her gloss. “I wouldn’t doubt it. Handong is known for their fine-ass students, you know,” Yunjin said with a shrug, and you giggled. “I’ve heard a lot of students there get cast as models,” you share, and Haechi looks at you suspiciously.

“You seem excited to see them?” Haechi states, trying to hide her jealousy, yet you read her like an open book. “Why wouldn’t I be? I’m sure I’ll see some cuties there,” you tease, leaning back on the chair. Expecting a laugh from the tall girl, you were surprised to feel her grip tighten around your thigh as it slowly raised higher, laying right under the fabric of your skirt. Your body tenses at the feeling.

“Am I not enough?” Her voice sounded so innocent, yet had a daring tone lying underneath, and you could clearly tell. Now, what were you supposed to respond to that? You stare at her, shocked at the question, and when she takes a peek at you, she chuckles at your reaction. “I’m kidding, Y/n-nie, don’t stress out too much.”

The car ride became silent between the two of you while the two girls in the back kept chatting. Once you make it to the school, Aeri looks around, a bit disgusted at the sight of the school. “Is this school small, or is it just me?” “Our school’s just really big,” you tell her, laughing as she silently judges the place. “Let’s go in through the back?” Haechi announces as her duffel hangs on her shoulder. She led the three of you through the back, passing by the other girls of her team.

“We don’t have to buy any tickets?” You asked, but before you can get a response, you hear a yelp from Aeri. You turn around and see Yunjin helping the shorter girl up as they face a tall group of girls. Their uniforms were forest green and orange in color. As they were unfamiliar to you, you were a bit cautious about what was about to happen, especially knowing Aeri’s fiery attitude.

“Can you look where you're walking?” The short girl’s voice was full of pure irritation. “My bad, shorty, it was just an accident. I didn’t see you,” you heard a deep tone, cockiness dripping from the words. “I- I’m sorry about my teammate. They just get a bit excited when playing on game day.” A taller girl from the back speaks up, and Aeri is about to go off. “Excited? What a fuck-”

Before she could continue, you stepped in, shutting her mouth with a simple shush from your lips, “Relax yourself, Aeri.” You face the unfamiliar team and bow, “Good luck on your game,” just keep it at that, taking the girl's wrist, trying to pull them away. “Wait, aren’t you a pretty little thing? I’ve never seen you here at Handong. Don’t tell me-“

“It obviously means she goes to Yunae University, idiot. So stop harassing the girl.” Another unknown voice speaks out; the rich tone makes your ears ring a little. You see a tall, attractive girl with raven hair walking forward, bowing to you. “I want to apologize for anything Aisha has said to you.” You smile at the leader-like gesture, “It’s alright. Your number 5 over here did her best to help.” The way you smiled had the tall girl's heart fluttering. There was just something about tall girls like you, huh? She gives a genuine grin, cat-like eyes softening at you, “Yel does her best in situations like this. I’m Doyeon, by the way.”

“Nice to meet you, Doyeon-nim. I’m Y/n from Yunae.”

Her eyes travel from your cute grin down to the stylish outfit. “You know I don’t usually condone Aisha and her words, but I must agree. You are a pretty little thing.”

You couldn’t deny feeling intimidated at the moment, feeling like a kitten being placed in a den full of preying lions. Despite having Yunjin and Aeri by your side, the tall girls towering over you had you feeling powerless. As the Handong basketball captain was about to continue, you felt a presence looming behind you, which felt suffocating. You peeked over your left shoulder, seeing Haechi’s familiar black bomber jacket.

To your right, however, was an unfamiliar outfit. Yet you sure did recognize the scent of her perfume. If it wasn't for the famous Bada Lee and her impeccable timing. “You two have to go change,” you tell them, patting their shoulders with the knuckles of your hands. You weren’t expecting them to move at your words, and you were completely correct. You don’t know why you ended up in a war of ‘who has the most rizz,’ but you weren’t super happy about it.

It was an ego booster, but you concluded that you weren’t built for the drama-filled life. Yet every time you tried to better yourself and stray away, it seemed to follow you around. “If it isn't the famous captains of Yunae,” Aisha’s cocky tone comes out again, and you feel the irritation of both captains bouncing off each other. Both Yunae captains were heated for different reasons. Haechi knew that you’d probably get hit on by someone, which was reasonable since you are a fine-ass woman, but Aisha’s approach ticked her off.

Bada, on the other hand, was familiar with Miss Kim Doyeon. Having gone to the same schools for many years, the two were basically competitors in school. Yes, Bada lacked in grades, but so did Doyeon. In every other aspect, they were quite even. The only main difference was Doyeon being more feminine, but that didn't change much. She and Bada were exactly the same, and she knew that not only meant trouble for you but for her as well.

Realistically, Bada didn’t know if her old pal changed, but safe to say she wasn’t about to take any chances, especially with you involved.

“Haven’t seen you in a while, Lee. Life’s been treating ya’ well?” Doyeon’s subtle teasing doesn't go over Bada’s head. Doyeon could read Bada like an open book, knowing how to annoy the girls with even a simple glance. And with her AND Haechi standing behind you, the situation was clearly all over the place for you. “You can say that,” Bada gives a faux smile as she secretly takes your hand in hers, tugging you closer to her direction.

You were starting to get uncomfortable with the tension that you just let her, not wanting to deal with this shit anymore. Haechi notices the close proximity between you two, and her brows furrow, the waves of confusion, jealousy, and anger mixing together. “Let’s just go, guys. I’m sure your team is waiting for you.”

You tell the two tall girls, patting their backs in the visitor locker room direction. The two players wanted to talk to you, but your best friends pulled you to the bleachers, taking a seat so you could talk about what just happened. “Now, what the actual fuck was that?” You shrug at Aeri, “You are the reason I was a part of that in the first place.” “To me, it seems like you had five hot girls crowding all over you,” Yunjin states bluntly with a smirk. You scoff at them, leaving the conversation at that since you were over the entire thing already.

After 10 minutes, the Yunae team starts pulling out onto the court, Haechi and Bada being the last ones. With their uniforms on, the girls were decked out in black and white with little details of light blue due to them playing at another school instead of their primarily light blue uniform. The girls begin warm-ups with Bada wearing her number 22 and Haechi wearing her 29.

As you chatted away with Yunjin, Aeri sat there on her phone, as she wasn't really interested in sports. The game began, and within the time span of 15 minutes, so much had happened. The current score was 34 - 38, with Yunae leading. The opposing team's players couldn't resist the temptation to flirt and vie for your attention. The little winks sent your way, kissy faces, even Yel, being the shy player of Handong, sent seductive eyes your way every now and then. They made their intentions clear, attempting to catch your eye throughout the game.

Haechi and Bada quickly picked up on the advances made by the opposing team. Their competitive spirits were inflamed, and they decided to take matters into their own hands.

As the game progressed, Haechi couldn't help but feel resentment, exchanging a knowing glance with Bada, who shared a similar expression to her. The co-captain leaned in closer to the tall girl, her voice filled with playful mischief.

"Looks like they're not just playing for points, are they? Should we give them a taste of their own medicine?" Haechi whispered to the girl, and Bada, always up for some friendly competition, grinned mischievously and nodded in agreement. "Absolutely. Let's make this game even more interesting."

Yunjin, who had been chatting with you about the team dynamics, noticed the sudden shift in Haechi and Bada's strategy. The two felt more aggressive on the court, and you couldn’t help but notice Haechi’s improvement while playing. Her speed had become evidently quicker while swiftly moving through the other team, being quite in sync with Bada.

You remembered Bada being the best player on their team by far. Yet months later, here Haechi was, being on par with the passionate player. As the opposing team continued to flirt and vie for your attention, Haechi and Bada began taunting their opponents in a playful yet competitive manner. They showcased their skills, trying to outshine their rivals and draw your attention. The game took on a new level of intensity as the players on both teams, fueled by a desire to impress you, pushed themselves to the limit. The flirting had turned into a friendly rivalry, and you couldn't help but find the entire situation amusing as you watched the game unfold.

At halftime, the opposing players started playing rough against the Yunae girls. They were shoving and elbowing, and fouls were getting called left and right. You looked on, serious, as you saw this, thinking they were more interested in fighting at this point than playing the game.

Tensions escalated as one of the opposing players commented disrespectfully about you. “I’m sure your little girlfriend over would be a nice trophy to win. She’d suit Handong students better, you know? Maybe Doyeon can get her after this.” Both Haechi and Bada reacted instantly, shoving the offender and fiercely protecting you and your image. "Hey, watch your mouth! Show some respect!" Haechi yells, but Bada can’t keep her cool, especially after seeing the smirk on Doyeon’s face after the comment, "Keep that nasty shit off the court, and stop involving her!"

The confrontation quickly spiraled into a small brawl during the game. After one final push from Haechi, Aisha seemed to reach her limit and threw a powerful punch at the opposing girls. You stood up, surprised by her action. Aisha was supposed to be the co-captain of Handong, but she was having a hard time controlling her emotions during the game.

"Protect Bada and Haechi-unnie!"

"No one disrespects Doyeon!"

The gym echoed with shouts and chaos as the brawl intensified, leaving you and your friends caught in the middle of a heated showdown. In the midst of the chaos, punches were thrown, and Bada and Haechi found themselves on the receiving end of blows. Despite the chaos around you, your immediate concern was Haechi. “Haech!” Your voice was loud and abrupt, running over to her side as you kneeled, touching her face in concern as you saw the bruise slowly forming. The tall girl whimpers in pain as she leans on her elbows, trying to sit up, yet has difficulty due to blows to the stomach.

Your worry and care were evident as you rushed to her side, tending to her injuries and offering comfort. Bada watched from the sidelines, growing even more furious than she had been before. She couldn't help but feel a pang of bitterness as she saw your concern and attention directed solely towards Haechi. It was a stark reminder of the divide that had grown between you and Bada, a divide she knew she deserved, given her past actions. You notice Bada’s dramatic exit out of the infirmary, heavy footsteps and sighs could be heard.

As you sat next to a pained Haechi, you couldn’t help but feel bad for the girl who had no one taking care of her.

Well, there you go again, being too kind to the wrong people. Just couldn’t help yourself huh?

Amidst the demanding next three weeks of student council duties that had overwhelmed your time as secretary, Haechi graciously respected your need for space. While you tackled your responsibilities, she maintained a continuous presence by sending supportive text messages throughout the day.

In these rare moments when rest briefly graced your hectic schedule, Bada seized the opportunity to approach you in your newest hang-out spot, the school garden. She wanted to at least try to rebuild that trust, especially after the petty fight in the game last week. Bada felt that in your eyes, she was now the most immature person in the world, yet she was unaware that Haechi had explained to you, the teasing, the comments made about you, the little bond they made, literally everything.

Everything except the past of Bada and Doyeon, which even Haechi had no idea about.

Bada envisioned a mature conversation with you, but as she drew closer, the emotions steamed beneath the surface began to surge forward.

Bada's voice quivered slightly as she spoke, a sense of plea in her voice. "Hey," she began, her eyes searching your face for any sign of acknowledgment. "Can we talk?"

You looked up from your work, meeting Bada's gaze. Your expression showed subtle uncertainty, though you were open to hearing her out. "Um, sure." You shifted to the left, creating space for her to sit. Bada took a seat, her head resting in her hands, dreading the conversation that lay ahead. Still, she knew she needed to ask for forgiveness at some point, so she might as well do it now.

Bada nodded earnestly, her voice trembling as she began, "I know I messed up." Her words were filled with remorse, but you scoffed softly.

"Saying you messed up is putting it lightly," you responded, your tone tinged with disappointment and irritation. "You made a bet on me, Bada. I'm not some object," you said, your voice wavering slightly. "I appreciate you trying to apologize, but I'm not sure I can forgive you." A trembling sigh escaped from Bada's lips. "I just wanted to talk to you about it."

You took a moment to think, aware that you often took the high road in situations like this. However, you were uncertain about the right decision at this particular moment. “I’m an insecure fuck who has no one,” Bada says, chuckling at herself. “I’m pathetic.”

You fix your gaze on her, annoyance and displeasure evident in every word. "You have no right to say that," you seethe, your voice quivering with anger, and Bada begins to feel cornered. Emotions swirl within you, and your voice trembles with the weight of your words. "You had me," you confess, tears welling up as frustration gnaws at your resolve. "I tried my best to be there for you, even though we hadn't known each other for that long. I cared."

The floodgates open, and you struggle to maintain your composure, a solitary tear slipping down your cheek. "You just couldn't let go of that player image, could you?" Your voice trembles with a mix of sadness and resentment. "You just had to string me along." The rawness of the moment hangs heavily in the air, a heartbreaking confrontation filled with disappointment and sorrow.

Bada couldn’t even look at you, it was as though you had become her kryptonite. Just capable of melting her defenses with a single glance. All she thought was, ‘You're a bad person. This is your karma.’

“I know,” Bada says silently, feeling a tear wetting her cheek, and she uses her sleeve to calm herself. “I’m the loser who let an amazing girl go,” Bada says, and she feels her disappointment again. Bada's breathing was becoming staggered, almost hyperventilating. With this happening before, you rest your hand on her back, rubbing in circles. “Breath, Bada. In through the nose, out through the mouth.” You stare at her face, which flushes red as she struggles to breathe. You knew that Bada felt bad, Haechi even telling you how upset she was when you left.

You just never knew the extent of it until now. So seeing this - a mentally broken Bada in front of you, had you in distress. You couldn’t help but hug the crying girl, and like months ago, you had her calming down just from your touch. “If you put in effort, I think I can try forgiving you,” you mumbled as her head nuzzled into your neck, trying to end the stress completely.

So, in the following days, Bada did try. The girl did everything she possibly could. Bada's acts of kindness showed her silent mission to seek your forgiveness. She understood the seriousness of her actions and was determined to make amends. Her gestures of kindness were sincere and subtle, reflecting her genuine remorse.

Every morning for the past week, you found a cup of freshly brewed coffee waiting for you at your desk in the student council office. The aroma was always comforting, and the warmth of the gesture touched your heart as you got used to the strong scent. Bada even noticed your heavy workload and would discreetly carry your bag whenever your hands were full of books or papers. She made it seem effortless, ensuring your burden felt lighter.

You even receive an unexpected lunch from Bada occasionally. The meal would be carefully packed and contain your favorite dishes - which she pestered you for, a thoughtful gesture that was impossible to ignore. On the lunches, you'd find apologetic notes tucked into your textbooks or slipped under your door. Bada expressed her regret and longing for your forgiveness in these handwritten messages. You were bombarded with all this and were surprised at her persistent and dedicated efforts.

As Bada demonstrated her genuine remorse through these acts of kindness, a gradual shift in your perception began to take shape. It wasn't an overnight transformation, but her consistent efforts and heartfelt gestures couldn't be denied. You reflected on the possibility of forgiveness, and your heart slowly began to open to the idea of at least being friends again.

Meanwhile, all this is happening, and Haechi has become more aware, remaining wary of the situation. She knew the extent of Bada's genuine feelings for you, which had only intensified during your time apart. Haechi had seen firsthand how you had affected Bada, and she couldn't shake the feeling that she might be losing you. Haechi can’t deny she’s taken a liking to you over the months, but she felt like she couldn’t compete with that at all. Her insecurities and fears bubbled beneath the surface as she observed your interactions with Bada. Yet she knew to accept defeat, knowing you weren’t necessarily over the tall captain either.

In Haechi’s mind, even just for a little while, she wanted to have you all to herself. You put her at ease, made her a better person, and overall made her feel loved. But that’s the same way Bada felt, maybe to the extreme even. Her worries got even worse when you and Bada had to work on an English assignment together, having to write up a script for a play in the next two weeks.

That’s when Haechi finally confided in you, her voice tinged with a hint of vulnerability. "I can't help but feel a bit uneasy, you know. I've seen how much you mean to Bada, and it's hard not to worry about what might happen between you two." You nodded, understanding her concerns. "I get it, Haechi. But we just have to get through this project then it’ll be back to normal."

She sighed, her worries still lingering and you couldn’t help but beat yourself up mentally. The both of you knew you were lying, to her and yourself. As the days passed, the situation became increasingly complicated, but your open conversation with Haechi was a small step toward easing her concerns and maintaining the balance in your relationship.

During the second week of the project, you and Bada unexpectedly hit a bump in the road.

In the midst of your project work, emotions that had been simmering beneath the surface finally boiled over. The two of you sat in her bedroom that day, working on your laptops and as you stayed focused with your large adorable glasses on, she couldn’t help but think how irresistible you looked.

Bada had kept staring, and you felt the tension steadily increasing, fueled by unresolved feelings and a shared history that couldn't be ignored. As the two of you worked side by side, the atmosphere grew increasingly charged.

You both leaned over a table, discussing project details, your eyes locked onto each other's.

“You’re gorgeous Y/n,” Bada could only whisper, being hypnotized by your puppy-like eyes as you stared at the girl. After the past two weeks, the never-ending interactions and genuine drive to be in your life were beginning to affect your heart in the same way it did before.

Bada couldn’t help herself, you just looked so tempting.

In that moment, the world seemed to fade away, leaving only the chemistry between you. The air crackled with tension as you both leaned in, drawn together. Your lips met in a heartfelt kiss, that felt like a culmination of all the emotions building between you. It was a kiss filled with longing, desire, and the weight of unspoken words. As your mouths moved in sync, the world around you ceased to exist, and you were consumed by the intoxicating sensation of being so close to someone you had missed for so long.

Each touch, each caress, conveyed a depth of emotion that words could never capture. It was a kiss born from a complex mixture of attraction, regret, and the undeniable connection that had always existed between you. At that moment, the lines between friendship and love seemed more blurred, and you were both swept away by the intensity of each other's lips.

The tension and unresolved emotions that had been building between you erupted in a passionate and heated kiss. The kiss quickly escalated into a fervent make-out, leaving both of you breathless and confused in the aftermath.

As you pulled away from each other, your minds were left in turmoil, struggling to make sense of the unexpected turn of events. The lines between friendship, attraction, and unresolved feelings had become blurred, and the path forward was uncertain. “I think I should go,” you say, slipping out of her grasp quickly, and leaving her home even with Bada’s voice telling you not to. You just walked and walked, your mind becoming scrambled more by the minute.

What the fuck were you suppose to do now?

When you found yourself in school the next day, you sat next to Yunjin and Aeri who spoke to each other, while your mind spaced off. The past few days were blurring together, and you were having a hard time keeping up with the two taller girls.

Haechi, ever perceptive, noticed the turmoil in your thoughts but she understood that it was not the right time to press you for an explanation or to make you feel any more overwhelmed. Instead, she decided that taking you out for fun would be a welcome distraction.

"Hey," Haechi said with a warm smile, gently taking your hand. "I can tell you've got a lot on your mind. How about we take a break from all this and have a bit of fun?" You nodded, grateful for the offer of an escape. "Yeah, that sounds nice."

Haechi whisked you away after school to a vibrant carnival, where the colorful lights and joyful atmosphere immediately began to work their magic. You both indulged in the various attractions and games, with Haechi displaying impressive skills in winning you prizes, all while sharing laughter and enjoying thrilling rides. The carnival food was a guilty pleasure, and you both indulged in cotton candy, popcorn, and all the delicious treats it had to offer.

As you prepared to part ways with Haechi, you couldn't help but express your gratitude. "Haechi, tonight was amazing. Thanks for taking my mind off everything. It means a lot." Haechi smiled warmly, her eyes reflecting genuine care. "I'm glad you had a good time. We all need a break sometimes, especially from the chaos of life."

Her unexpected affectionate peck on your cheek left you momentarily flustered. You stammered, "Oh, um... thanks." She chuckled, understanding the mixture of emotions you were going through. "Take your time to sort things out, okay? I'm here for you, whatever you need." With her reassuring words lingering in your mind, you continued your journey home, your thoughts in disarray. Questions swirled within you, and you couldn't help but wonder aloud, "What do I really feel? Is it Haechi or Bada who has my heart?"

The carnival had indeed offered a temporary escape from your complicated emotions, but it hadn't provided the answers you desired. Your feelings remained a complex web of affection and uncertainty, and you knew that the path ahead held many more twists and turns.

The confusion lingered as you continued working on the project with Bada. She extended an invitation to dinner after one of your study sessions, choosing a simple fast-food place where the atmosphere felt comfortable and familiar. The dimly lit diner, with its soft music playing in the background, provided a setting where conversations could be had.

As you both sat down with your meal, Bada took a deep breath, her eyes revealing a mixture of nervousness and determination. "There's something I need to say," she began, her voice earnest.

You nodded, urging her to continue. "Sure, go ahead."

Bada decided to lay everything on the table, her words filled with raw honesty. She opened up about her struggles, regrets, and the turmoil she had experienced during the time you were apart. "I want you to know that I haven’t been the best version of myself, especially after you left," she admitted, her gaze fixed on you. "I did some things that I'm not proud of, and I hurt you. I know that."

Her words hung in the air, and you could see the pain in her eyes. She continued, "I couldn't accept that you were gone, and I resorted to unhealthy ways to feel better. I was ashamed of myself, and I regret how I treated you." Her voice wavered, but she pushed forward. "I need you to know that I'm genuinely sorry for my actions. I wish I could take back what I did, but I can't. All I can do now is try to make things right."

The sincerity in Bada's words was strong, and it left you with a mix of emotions. You felt her honesty and wondered how to respond to her heartfelt confession. Yet she doesn’t rush you, and you appreciate it as you need to figure out this Haechi situation first.

So the next day in school, you built up the courage to talk to her during lunch. Pulling her up to the rooftop of the school, you breathed in the fresh air, trying to calm the nerves that began to course through your veins. Haechi, ever perceptive, noticed the changes in Bada's demeanor and your complex emotions. She began with empathy, "I've seen the efforts Bada has been making to make amends, and I can tell that there are still feelings between you two."

You nodded, acknowledging the truth in her words. "Yeah." Her words were sweet but you felt more disgusted with yourself by the minute, it felt like you playing with her heart even if those weren’t your intentions. She gave you a reassuring smile, her eyes filled with understanding. "I want you to know that I respect your wishes and choices. I'm not here to pressure you or to make things more complicated. What matters most is your happiness."

That's when tears began to well in your eyes. You were certain you didn’t deserve her. "Haechi, I appreciate your understanding. It's just that everything feels so complicated right now." She gently squeezed your hand. "I don’t think it's THAT complicated Y/n. Just know that I'm here to support you, no matter what you decide."

The weight of the conversation hung in the air as you grappled with your feelings and the choices ahead. Haechi's understanding and support were a source of comfort, but the path you had to navigate remained uncertain and emotionally charged. You couldn't shake the guilt that had been creeping in, eating at you for using Haechi as a distraction from the stress and turmoil that Bada had brought into your life. You carried the weight of your actions with a heavy heart, and it was hard to look Haechi in the eye.

The silence between you was felt comforting but anxiety-inducing at the same time. It was Haechi who decided to break the tension. She reached out and gently touched your hand again, her voice delicate and understanding. "You may be the smartest girl in school, Y/n, but you're also human. You can't help who you fall for."

Her words carried a weight that resonated deeply within you. It was a bittersweet realization, one that tugged at your heartstrings. Haechi delivered it with a sad smile, acknowledging the complexity of your emotions. The guilt still lingered, but Haechi's understanding and support were a source of solace in the midst of your emotional turmoil.

That’s when Bada came into mind, and you smile a little at the thought of her pretty face. “You should go tell her.” You stare at Haechi like she grew three heads, and she laughs. “Why wait? The girl was beating herself up over you, I think it’s time to give her what she’s been wanting.” Her tone joked but you knew she was serious, so you impulsively got up and ran through the school, bumping into so many students in the process as you make your way to the cafeteria, knowing Bada and her friends would be there.

Once you see the oreo-haired girl sitting at their lunch table, you quickly drag her out to the school garden. Bada couldn’t even comprehend what was happening right now, just feeling the strong force drag her wrist.

When the two of you stop, she looks at you, a bit dizzy due to the dragging. “Y/n? Are you okay?” Bada asks, trying to snap herself out of the daze you put her in making you chuckle. “I’m sorry about dragging you all the way out here. But I just had to tell you now.”

“Tell me what?”

“That no matter what happened 6 months ago, I’ll still love your dumbass,” you say with a smile and Bada’s eyes go wide. A stupid grin forms on her face as she pulls you into a warm bearing hug. “I think I’ve finally been healed,” she jokes and you pull away, slapping her forehead as she laughs. Once she settles down, she softly touches your cheeks, giving you a loving kiss. You smile, and the thought of the two of you officially being together circulates in your brain.

As she rests her forehead on yours, her gaze notices your goofy smile. “Why are you smiling like that?” She asks with a laugh, adoring the look on your face. “Would you wanna be mine?” The abrupt question had Bada pause, an amused chuckle left her lips, “Shouldn’t I be asking you that?”

“Oh, just answer the damn question,” you tell her as you roll her eyes. Your irritated reaction makes Bada smile again, pulling you into a strong embrace and she kisses the temple of your head, “Of course I’d love to be yours.”

The two of you stare at the beautiful flowers, and Bada pulls away, cheesing again. “What now?”

“The top student’s officially mine.”

“Oh shut up,” you say with a soft giggle leaving your lips as you stare at your, finally, girlfriend.

Tag list (OPEN): @chipswsauce @nimixe @yooqui @eeeetaetterswife @efyyylee @froufrousnowman @amararosesblog @ssc7514 @kayascar @mrsdacherry @angel-hyuckie @letthemagicc @linda-botello @hyynee @only-minghaos @noraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa @sun-nyy @tikitsune @xiakiyama @v2br33zyy

#ssivinee #gxg #wlw #street woman fighter 2 #bada lee #street woman fighter x reader #bebe #bada lee x reader #swf2

508 notes · View notes

lvndrdaaze · 5 months

Note

OMG HI MY FAVORITE TUMBLR CREATOR I have an idea >>:D WHAT IFF Your favorite Genshin Men (Diluc) come home extremely late ((2:00 am late)) and you are MAD. So- after you express how you feel (NICELY OFCCC❤️❤️) they feel so bad that they spoil you ROTTEN. Anddd if you doo— then uhh I'll sing... SWAY BY MICHAEL BUBLÉ!!!

(Honestly— Micheal Bublé reminds me so much of Diluc idk why) ALSO TYY FOR TGD WRIOTHESLEY ALPHABET!!!

——🎵🎶🎼Anon (⁠ ⁠◜⁠‿⁠◝⁠ ⁠)⁠♡

aaaaaaaa i'm sorry this took so long to get out (つ﹏⊂) i hope you like it!! i put my whole pussy into this one just for you <33

(also i've never thought about it but now that you mention it...yeah diluc does give michael bublé vibes ._. and now i'll never un-notice it)

Warnings: SMUT, includes use of 'pussy' and 'cunt', light hurt/comfort, crying, insecurities, oral (f!receiving), p in v, missionary, mating press, breeding kink (if you squint), biting, squirting

(fem!reader, NSFW so no minors!!)

Wc: 2.6k

The Dawn Winery was always quiet at this time of night, though you weren't usually awake to notice it. With the maids asleep and all other business concluded for the day, the only sounds in the manor's entrance hall were the crackling of the fire and the rush of blood in your ears.

Diluc was out again, fulfilling his self-imposed duties as he did every night.

Not once had you ever complained, knowing that the Darknight Hero was something of a coping mechanism for Diluc, but tonight, something about the quiet of the manor caused all of that repressed loneliness to well up from deep within your bones, streaming out in sorrowful trickles from where it had been locked away for so long.

You sat at one end of the sofa, staring into the fire. It reminded you so much of him, not only for the obvious reason of his pyro vision, but because of the burning intensity of it. Once, he would have been beside you, red eyes crackling with that same passion that few others recognised in him, hands exploring your skin like a new world made just for him.

But now, you were alone. All you wanted was for him to come home and take up the other seat, to take his place beside you and stay for a while. There were no doubts in your mind as to his adoration for you, you saw it anytime he spent so much as a few moments by your side. It was his dedication to protecting the city that drew him away from you, forcing more and more distance between the both of you.

If only his feelings of guilt weren't so much stronger than his love for you.

When the door to the Winery suddenly swung open, you were startled out of your reverie. Shooting a glance over your shoulder to watch him enter, you read the exhaustion written in every movement he made like a story you had read a million times before. His claymore was propped against the wall and his coat hung on the rack before he noticed you sitting there.

As soon as he did, his eyebrows furrowed. Even with such a look of concern, it felt good to have his eyes on you once again.

"Love?" He called out to you, consternation tinging his low voice. "What are you still doing up?"

How could you answer that? The truth, that you had been aching for him to return and spare you even a single glance, would only weigh him down further. The worst thing you felt you could possibly be in this moment was a burden to him; that would only push him further away.

"Just couldn't sleep." You lied easily, giving him what you hoped was a convincingly relaxed smile.

However, Diluc's frown only grew deeper.

"Love…you're crying." He pointed out gently, not yet moving from his spot in front of the sturdy wooden doors.

With a swipe of your fingers across your cheek, you found that he was right. They came away wet, glistening in the warm firelight.

"Oh…" You hadn't even noticed them until now, but suddenly, your lip trembled with the emotions just barely being held back. "It's nothing, don't worry about it."

But your placating words only seemed to make him worry more. In an instant, he had crossed the room, kneeling before you and cupping your damp cheeks in his hands with a troubled look in his eyes.

"Please don't lie to me." He requested quietly. His thumbs swiped delicate lines beneath your eyes, clearing the tears that collected there.

His intense gaze was filled with such deep concern, such apparent care, it felt impossible to hide your feelings from him any longer, despite not wanting to cause him any more strain.

With a light sniffle, you dropped your gaze from his to your lap, staring down at your fidgeting fingers as they twisted around each other fretfully.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to trouble you, I just…"

Your words faltered, and tears clouded your vision once again, streaming down your cheeks in hot rivulets. Diluc stroked your skin soothingly, waiting patiently for your words.

"I miss you, Luc." Your voice was barely above a whisper. "You've been so busy recently, and I don't want to take up your time when you've got so much on your plate already, but I just feel so…lonely."

The air was still for a few seconds after your admission, until you chanced a look up at his face. His expression was stormy, clouded with irritation, causing your stomach to drop. Of course, you were demanding too much of the man who already had so many people depending on him. With a shake of your head, you pulled away from his gentle touch.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to be a burden. I'll be fi-."

"No." Diluc cut you off with a firm shake of his head, taking your hands into his with the utmost conviction. "Don't apologise. Never apologise for taking up my time."

Your lip quivered once again, the vehement tone of his voice only making your guilt feel that much stronger. Of course, Diluc would be understanding. Why had you even tried to hide your feelings in the first place?

"No matter how busy I am, you are always my priority. I apologise for failing to show you that, my love." He spoke in a low voice.

One hand released yours as he wiped the tears from your eyes again, tilting your gaze up to meet his fiercely passionate one.

"Allow me to make it up to you, love." He murmured in a voice so gentle the steady crackle of the fireplace almost drowned it out.

His gaze was heavy on your rapidly easing expression as he approached slowly and grazed his lips over yours faintly. The aching tenderness of his mouth, the smoky scent clinging to his clothes, the warmth of his body so close yet so far, everything about the moment was so overwhelming. A soft whimper escaped you as he coaxed you into a careful kiss, easing your sadness with every reassuring brush of his lips against yours.

In your desperation to prolong the feeling, your hands gripped his shirt tightly, wrinkling the fine material in your fists. With his gloved hand cradling your jaw, he tipped your head back just slightly, providing him a better angle to glide his hot tongue against your lips as he deepened the kiss.

His free hand came down to rest on your thigh, skimming over the shape of your leg beneath your dress in a way that made you tremble with barely repressed want. Diluc noticed the shiver that ran up your spine at that slightest touch, and with a low rumble from deep within his chest, his wandering hand groped more firmly at the plushness of your thighs and his tongue tangled with yours in a display of his own growing need.

Your heart was racing faster than you thought was possible, the sound of blood rushing in your ears all you could hear. No thoughts made their way past the overwhelming feelings he caused to blossom within you. Eager fingers found their way to his nape, tugging the hair tie from his hair and threading through the fiery red locks. Diluc let out a groan at the feeling, and in an instant, his arms were looping under your thighs, scooping you off the sofa easily.

"Apologies, my love, I had not realised just how long it had been." He murmured, pressing one last kiss to your lips before heading towards the stairs with you in his arms, your legs wrapped around his waist tightly.

"Allow me to make this right, yes?"

The heat in the bedroom was sweltering, radiating from where the both of you laid together for the first time in several days. Your clothes had been long since discarded, and your shivering body was coated in a thin sheen of sweat.

Diluc laid between your legs, sweat gluing a few red strands to his forehead in a way that was almost lewd on its own from your vantage point among the luscious pillows of his bed. Strong hands pinned your quivering thighs to the bed insistently, preventing you from closing them whilst his tongue explored your folds as though it were the first time he had ever done it.

Archons knows how many orgasms he had pulled from you so far; your throat ached with every keen and whimper you let out, and dull heat throbbed in your stomach with every dip of his tongue into your wet entrance as yet another high approached steadily.

Diluc's eyes were clouded with a lustful haze as he paid attention to every reaction you made and the lower portion of his face glimmered wetly with your slick, but he showed no signs of stopping yet. Even by tugging on his loose hair, you were unable to draw his lips away from your aching cunt- in fact, the action only spurred him on, drawing deep rumbles from his chest in response to the sharp sensation in his scalp.

"Luc, please…" you whined, though you weren't certain what it was that you were pleading for. The stimulation was too much, the thought of another orgasm overwhelming, but the idea of him retracting his tongue was even worse.

"Shhh…just one more, love." He mumbled huskily, his eyes slipping shut in contentment.

His lips lowered to your entrance, lapping up the essence of your arousal whilst his nose nudged against your clit, sending electric waves up your spine. Wetness soaked the sheets beneath your hips, and the fine silk was rumpled messily from your writhing.

Wet sounds filled the room as Diluc slurped obscenely on your pussy, every action he made undignified and animalistic with his need to taste you, to feel the way your walls clamped around his tongue as though desperate to keep him there forever.

He dragged the hot muscle of his tongue against your core slowly, swirling around your clit once, twice, then fusing his lips around the bud and sucking. Your back arched and your eyes clenched shut, a clamorous wail tearing through you at the same time as your pleasure peaked, every muscle in your body spasming in euphoria as another orgasm crashed over you. The whole room seemed to fade away, until all that was left was Diluc's mouth, working you determinedly through the peak of your pleasure.

The sensation was so intense, it took several seconds for you to come down. His lips withdrew, peppering light kisses along your inner thighs until your eyes had fluttered open again, searching for him blearily in the darkness.

He appeared almost smug, smiling contentedly as he kissed his way back up your body, lathing his tongue over marks that he had left on his way down. He worked slowly, his hands sliding up your sides and coming to fondle your breasts greedily, rolling your nipples between his fingers whilst he ran his sinful tongue over your damp skin.

By the time he reached your lips, you were whining and bucking against the mattress once again, still not quite satiated after all of the pleasure he had given you. Lying atop you like this, his cock pulsed with need between your bodies, and the slight twitch of him was all it took to get you going again.

"Do you think you can handle one more?" He murmured against your lips, his hips rocking against your stomach, staining your skin with pearls of precum.

"Yes, gods, yes. Please, Luc, need to feel you." Your words came out as desperate sobs, and he breathed a shaky exhale as he leaned his weight onto his elbows above your shaking body.

"Archons…" Diluc whispered, his head dipping into the crook of your neck to nibble softly at the skin there. "You are simply irresistible."

Quickly, he aligned himself with your entrance, running the warm head of his cock through your folds to collect the combination of your juices and his saliva, before pressing it against your tight hole with a groan.

The stretch of him, so thick and hard as he pushed his way into your cunt, was almost more than you could handle this soon after such an intense orgasm. His pelvis ground up against your clit when he bottomed out, stuffing you full with his aching cock whilst you cried out for him.

He held himself there for a few moments, short, gasping breaths leaving his parted lips as he steadied himself. The lushness of your walls wrapped around him was too delicious to be over so soon.

"I promise, I'll never leave you alone again." He whispered, fixing his gaze on your cock-drunk expression as he delivered one slow thrust into your heat.

"I'll keep you satisfied from now on, my love. Never going to let you go without my touch again. I'll dedicate my whole life to you, okay? You'll never be lonely again, I swear."

Diluc was babbling unconsciously with every thrust he gave, all sweet words and promises in a deep, velvety voice that pushed you further into those blissful feelings.

All you could do was moan and sob incoherently in response, tears of ecstasy wetting your lashes as the shivers running up and down your spine grew more and more violent, wracking through your body in tremorous waves in time with every wet slap of his hips against yours.

Strong hands found their way under your hips, lifting them off the mattress slightly so that he could press your thighs upwards and practically fold you in half against the mattress. The tip of his cock reached even deeper inside you in this new position, and your walls pulsed around him in response to the intense sensations.

"Archons, you feel too good…" He moaned, leaning down to lathe the sensitive skin of your neck in hot, sloppy kisses that were so unlike the tender way he usually kissed you. "Gonna cum for me again, love?"

Frantically, you nodded. The invisible string in your stomach tightened until your entire body felt like a piece of elastic ready to snap as his pace only grew more animalistic. White blind spots began to grow in your vision with every invasion of his thick length into your aching hole, and your symphony of moans were surely waking up the maids on the other side of the mansion by now.

"Gonna fill you up, my love. Gonna cum so deep, you'll always have me in you." Diluc growled. His pace was faltering, each drag of his cock inside you losing their rhythm but gaining strength in his wild desperation.

Your responding whine was music to his ears, and he panted hot breaths against the sweat-slick skin of your throat.

"Luc, 'm gonna cum-" Your words came out slurred, as though drunk on the pleasure. Even your eyes could hardly stay open, so overwhelmed with extraordinary pleasure that every muscle inn your body seemed to be clenched tight.

"Me too, fuck- cum for me, darling. Let me feel you, need to feel you." He groaned, sinking his teeth into the column of your throat. "Cum for me, and I'll give you everything."

That was all it took to send you crashing over the edge into impossible pleasure. Your back arched and a loud scream of ecstasy tore out of your throat. Wetness coated his stomach as you squirted with the force of it, finally pushing him over the edge until he was crashing down to his own climax. Diluc let out a loud moan at the same time as yours, and your synchronised cries of pleasure filled the once silent Winery with the sound of your devotion.

#diluc x reader #diluc x reader smut #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact x reader smut #diluc ragnvindr x reader

201 notes · View notes

moonlight-prose · 2 years

Text

IT WILL COME BACK

a/n: this man won the poll and in all honesty, i couldn't stop myself from writing for tommy miller. have you seen him? he's fine as fuck. which resulted in this. in my head i will just make this a small collection of drabbles compiled on a masterlist. so after this i'll reblog prompts you can request more from that tie into this fic. since i have my joel series going i won't make this a full series (yet). either way i hope you enjoy.

summary: mornings in the kitchen with him made life worthwhile.

word count: 4.1k+

pairing: pre-outbreak tommy miller x f!reader

warnings: EXPLICIT SO MINORS DNI, cussing, oral (f receiving), floor sex, p in v sex (not really though), spitting, tommy miller being a little shit, fluff, romance.

Sunlight attempted to break through your curtains; the sheer white blocking anything but the warmth. You felt it creep along the bed, encasing you in a bundle of blankets that trapped the sun’s glow. Shifting to your side, you expected to feel him there. Feel the broad expanse of his chest as you reached out with still closed eyes.

You found nothing but the cold sheets instead.

The first thing that ran through your mind as your eyes fluttered open, was that he must have woken up early enough to head out to work. It would explain why you never heard him leave. While he may share your bed at night, this wasn’t his home. Not entirely.

The drawer you emptied for him only held a flannel or two—mainly for you to use—but nothing essential remained. At night his touch, his body, was yours but once morning came, they were nothing but a lingering memory that stuck to the edges of your mind. If it weren’t for his scent that still remained on the blankets—you would have thought you imagined him.

With a sigh, you sat up. The sheets pooled at your waist, exposing your bare chest. It’s not like you needed him here in the morning, but waking up alone always felt hollow without him. Tommy turned your house into a space you actually found solace in, but the serenity never truly lasted. So, you were left with no other choice but to swallow the pain like it was medicine.

When in fact it was poisoning you slowly; Tommy simply remained your antidote.

Searching through the drawer, you pulled out one of his flannels. More than happy to be wrapped up in his scent.

Eventually, the time would come when you would have to go about your day, and the memory of last night would shift into becoming just that. A memory. But for now you basked in the afterglow that still stuck to your skin.

The urge to tell Tommy what you were feeling would have normally come out sooner or later. But this feeling, this aching loneliness that ate away at the inside of your body, was something you kept to yourself. If he knew how him leaving each morning affected you, he would let the guilt fester in his heart. Because that was his weakness at the end of the day. It wasn’t you, but the feeling that his actions caused you to hurt.

You found that it was better to keep him in the dark, than to burden him with something that would ultimately change the trajectory of your relationship. It was easier this way. Or at least that was a belief you continued to tell yourself. You loved him, this he knew, and he loved you all the same. But the future was a topic that terrified you enough to keep it hidden until things could one day be different.

The scent of coffee filled the bedroom. You figured the timer on the machine must have gone off, starting the brew. That became your alarm most days, the aroma of a good cup of coffee usually pulled you out of bed faster than an alarm.

Tightening the flannel around your bare body, you made your way downstairs, instantly regretting forgetting your slippers as your feet connected with the cold hardwood floors. You wouldn’t be down here long, ready to grab a cup of coffee and crawl back into the safety of your blankets. Yet the sound of a crooning southern voice playing softly in the background and someone humming along, stopped you in the doorway of the kitchen.

Tommy stood at the stove, attempting to flip what you assume was an omelet at one point. Even though you couldn’t see his face, you knew his expression. The furrow of his eyebrows as he concentrated, his lips pursed in frustration when things didn’t exactly go his way.

“Good morning,” you said, drawing his attention away from the catastrophe on the stove.

He turned, his chest and stomach on display. You felt heat creep up your face at the sight of the dark hickeys that trailed down into his jeans. Last night was still a slight blur, but you could vividly recall leaving those—marking him as yours. A wild need to possess him took you over as he was sprawled out beneath your body. Other times you would feel the slight tinge of embarrassment creep into your mind, but you knew he loved it.

“You’re up,” he responded, his eyes dragging down the expanse of your bare legs. His flannel only covered so much—leaving you open and free for him to admire. “I was making you breakfast.” His tongue swept along his bottom lip. You wondered if you left a slight bruise from where you had sucked it into your mouth.

“Smells good.”

He smiled, turning back to flip off the burner. “Smells like burnt shit, but thanks for lying.”

Moving around the table, you slid your hands up his back, lips pressing to his shoulder and suddenly…the ache disappeared. Retreating to the far reaches of your mind, giving you the peace you needed. Sighing against his skin, you felt him shiver beneath your touch. You know his reaction by heart now. Could practically see the way his eyes fluttered closed for a moment, the pleasure of your touch grounding him.

Tommy would forever be a man with a mission. Never once able to sit still long enough to not fly away, but you were the gravity holding him down. You were the reason he hadn’t left this town yet. Though he left every morning, there still remained the guarantee that no matter what, he’d return once the sun went down. Falling into your bed with whispered promises he would eventually break, and a love that was sweeter than honey.

“I thought you had work this morning,” you said, wrapping your arms around his waist, his hands shifting to rest over yours.

“Called Joel while you were asleep. Told him I’d be coming late.”

You hummed, hand dragging slowly down his stomach. “I bet he wasn’t happy about that.”

The soft huff of laughter he let out made your heart beat just a bit quicker. But it was the soft groan that rumbled in his chest as your hand dipped into his jeans, that had a fresh wave of slick pooling out of you. He was already hard, his cock heavy in your hand as you slowly palmed him. The realization made you throb, the heady dizziness of lust rushing over you. Wrapping your hand around his length, you felt him twitch, dragging another grunt from him.

If you had the time, you’d drop to your knees for him there in the kitchen. Make him see stars the way he did to you last night. But Joel was an impatient man when it came to Tommy. You knew he only had barely an hour tops and you wanted him inside you before the time ran out.

He turned quickly, forcing you to let go of him. The small sound of protest you let out, cut off by his lips, his hand wrapping gently around your throat to keep you there, tongue delving into your mouth with ease. Tommy knew what made you melt into his body, knew how to drag out all manner of sounds from you, and you gave in willingly. You were his to mold. His to have.

“Baby,” he breathed, his fingers digging into your ass, dragging you closer. “I can feel you soakin’ my jeans.”

A wet moan was pressed to his jaw. Your hips rolled over his denim clad thigh that was slotted between your legs. You knew you were leaving a wet spot on the fabric—that he’d have to wear these jeans to work probably—but you couldn’t care. Not when you felt the fabric catch on your clit, sending a shock through your body.

“Want you,” you gasped, nails digging into his chest. “I need you inside me.”

He moaned, hips grinding against yours. You felt him pull down his flannel, cupping your breast in his palm, thumb running over your peaked nipple, before he dipped down and took it into his mouth. Gasping, your head fell back, hips rolling over his leg even faster as the pleasure continued to mount in your body. Heat spilling into every part of you, burning you from the inside out.

“Tommy.”

He groaned as you pulled at his curls, dragging his lips back to yours. If there was a place you’d want to spend forever with, it was here with him. Wrapped up in your small safe haven of just each other. No one else existed when you were with Tommy. He consumed you, yet you gave into it without question. There was no one else for you and he knew it.

Dragging the piece of fabric off your body, his calloused palms ran along your skin, sending a shiver through your body at his light touch. You whimpered, barely able to open your eyes due to the dizziness clouding your mind. He smiled at your reaction, eyes dark with lust and yet somehow within the brown, you saw the light he had within. The light you ached for.

There he was, pouring it into you with each kiss pressed to your skin. He promised you forever without saying it and you wanted so badly for him to keep it this time.

“Take me upstairs baby,” you breathed into his mouth, hand feeling his stomach clench as you pressed your palm to his hot skin.

He shook his head. “Can’t do that ma’am.”

“What?” Pulling back, you felt him smile against your throat, his teeth sinking into your skin a moment later. “W-why?” you rasped, fingers curling around his hair in an effort to grasp onto something stable.

“Want to eat you,” he mumbled against you, teeth closing around your earlobe and tugging. “And I eat my meals in the kitchen.”

If it were any other time and his fingers weren’t inching towards your aching clit, you would have laughed. Told him he was an idiot in the most loving voice you could muster—your emotions bubbling over with a single look from him. But before you could get the word out, his fingers circled your clit, causing you to sag into his hold. You buried your head into his neck, your cry muffled against his skin as he built the rapidly growing pressure in your stomach.

“You gonna come for me honey?” You nodded, hips rolling over his thigh faster in an attempt to get there, to feel the hot bliss wash over your skin. “I know you want to.”

“Tommy,” you panted, nails digging into his shoulder. “Please.”

He groaned, fingers digging down to spread you, your slick practically dripping down his hand. “You sound so fuckin’ pretty when you beg. Alright honey, I got you.”

You keened when he pressed you down harder on his thigh, guiding you through the small stunted thrusts. Vaguely you were aware of how much time was passing, but the worry that he’d leave soon was washed from your mind the second he pinched your clit between his fingers. You sobbed into his neck, eyes rolling back as the dam finally broke, your body going taut—pleasure flooding you. It practically spilled out of you, overwhelming every part of your being, and Tommy kept going.

He pushed and pulled your hips, dragging you along his thigh and smearing your cum along the fabric until they were good and ruined. The pleasure continued to build, burning so hot inside you that you could barely see straight. If you weren’t careful you wouldn’t be able to find a way back to yourself, but maybe that’s what he wanted. Maybe he wanted to ruin you so perfectly, you’d never be the same after him.

Although who were you kidding. There’d never be anything after Tommy.

“Oh god oh god,” you chanted, your withering moan being swallowed by his lips colliding with yours.

Spit trailed down your chin as he pulled away. The two of you combined; you expected him to wipe it away. Only he smeared it across your cheek, his dark eyes following his thumb as it dragged along your skin.

“On the floor,” he said, his voice gruff and thick with lust.

Even if you wanted to, you wouldn’t have been able to deny him. Your mind had settled into that sweet spot of numbness that allowed him to maneuver your body in any way he pleased. Without realizing it, you found yourself spread on the kitchen floor, his flannel now parted to reveal the expanse of your naked body. A sight that Tommy was indulging himself in.

“So damn beautiful,” he murmured, his hand trailing up your waist, fingers stroking the side of your breast. “And all fuckin’ mine.”

Your body jolted, a shaky breath leaving you as he dropped down your body. Lips kissing and teeth biting along your hips—the dichotomy of pleasure and pain turning the molten burn into a raging fire. If there’s one thing you could expect with Tommy it was this. The softness that came with his touch.

He made you fall in love with his laughs, his jokes, but he owned you with his lips—his hands that spread you open, revealing you to his eyes.

“Baby,” you sighed as he pulled your legs up and over his shoulders, his eyes flicking up to meet yours.

“Yeah honey?”

The small word brought a smile to your lips. “Love you.”

You watched his eyes light up, his lips parting into a smile so big you felt it in your chest. There it was. The reason Tommy could call your heart his. You met him unexpectedly and before you knew it…he had you with that smile alone. He was the one you could call home, the one you saw yourself spending forever with. If only you knew that Tommy felt the exact same way—that the small little box tucked away in his jacket pocket was burning a hole right through his heart at this very moment.

“I love you so damn much,” he said, placing a kiss on your inner thigh.

The clock that hung on the kitchen wall taunted you, telling you that eventually your time with him would be up. That he’d get up, go to work, and leave nothing but the pleasurable ache between your thighs and sore bites up and down your skin. You wanted to capture this moment in your hands, to hold it close when he left. But all you could do was remain in it—savor his touch, his lingering love that burned you slowly, sensually.

The first lick of his tongue through your pussy sent a jolt up your body. You gasped, hips canting up slightly to meet his mouth as he moaned into you. Tommy was insatiable when it came to you, this became clear early on in your relationship. What you didn’t know was how enamored he was with your taste. How he craved you constantly. You learned quickly that if you didn’t cut him off, Tommy would spend hours between your thighs.

His lips attached to your clit, sucking it into his mouth and causing your head to fall back against the floor with a soft thud. Sparks littered up your spine, a broken sob of his name echoing off the kitchen walls. You were thankful the floor was so cold, because you were currently overheated, your body desperate for some balance to the madness.

“F-fuck,” you gasped, eyes falling shut, hand digging into his unruly curls. “You’re so good. I’m–fuck Tommy.” Your words broke off into a whine, his tongue pressing against your entrance.

He lost himself, the taste of you becoming an addiction he couldn’t get rid of, but at the end of the day…he wouldn’t want to. His nails scraped along your thighs as he moaned into your pussy, his hips grinding into the floor to appease the need he felt growing. Licking into you, he watched your mouth drop open in a silent sob, your legs shaking with each flick of his tongue along your clit. You wouldn’t last long, he knew this.

Except he was adamant to remain here with you, unwilling to leave until he felt you gush into his mouth.

Lifting his head, he heard your broken whines of protest echo in the air. The small beg to have him keep going caused his cock to throb painfully in his jeans. You were beautiful like this. Incoherent with pleasure and body covered with a sheen of sweat that made you glow in the early morning sunlight. He grinned, licking at his bottom lip, resembling a starved man desperate for another taste of his meal.

“I know, I know,” he murmured, shifting up swiftly to press his lips against yours. Sharing your taste as he licked deeply into your mouth. “My pretty baby.”

“I want you inside me,” you begged, hips bucking up to grind against his. “Please Tommy, need you to fill me—” He cut you off with a sharp gasp, his fingers sliding through your spit slicked pussy.

“‘M not done honey.”

The beg was on the tip of your tongue, another plea to hopefully convince him of what you both wanted. Him spitting into your pussy lewdly cut you off. Your eyes rolled back, his tongue spreading his spit up to your clit, fingers prodding at your entrance. The plea died in your throat—an incoherent cry of his name overtaking as his fingers curled into you, finding the spot along your walls without trying.

Tommy knew your body well enough to notice the signs. The way your legs trembled, how your walls clamped down around his fingers. You were right on the edge and he wanted to see you fly off. Moaning against your pussy one more time, he scraped his teeth gently along your clit, fingers rubbing against your g-spot in quick movements. The pleasure once again built, mind growing hazy with it as he continued to push you until you were right there.

Glancing down, you caught sight of him thrusting his hips against the floor, desperate to get himself there and that did it. You snapped, brokenly sobbing his name as your hips grinded against his mouth. He let you use him, doing his best to continue stimulating you, the wet sound of his fingers thrusting into your pussy now echoing through the room.

Pleasure filled you, burning its way through your body until you could do nothing but silently scream. You tried to catch your breath, but it was stuck—lodged in your chest—forcing you to take in gasps of air. All the way through, Tommy continued to lick and suck at your clit, grunting with each thrust of his hips. He was aching for you, nearly on the edge but unable to fully finish.

“Taste so fuckin’ good honey,” he mumbled drunkenly into your pussy, his eyes shut and mind in a state of delirium. “Shit—” The button of jeans knocked against the floor, his forehead falling to rest on your hip.

“Tommy,” you breathed, fingers curling around his arm and trying to tug him up your body. But not before he kissed above your clit, licking one last time into you.

His hand slapped against the floor above your head, tongue pushing your cum into your mouth and sending a shiver through your body. Even as your shaky hands dipped into his jeans, pulling him out, he still asked to keep tasting you. That’s how things worked in his mind. Seeing you cum was worth more to him than getting off himself.

“Want you to cum,” you mumbled into his mouth, tilting your hips up and notching his cock at your entrance.

“Fuck honey.” He gasped, as you started to fuck yourself on the very tip of his cock, his hand moving down to keep himself steady. “You want me to fill you up?”

You nodded, whining his name against his cheek. “Need it baby.”

Pumping himself in quick strokes, he felt his balls draw up—the tightening in his abdomen nearly causing him to double over. It wouldn’t take him long at all; his release already having built as he ate you out. The feeling of your hand moving to cup his balls did him in. With a hoarse shout he felt something break inside of himself, your walls clamping down around his cock as he finally pushed himself into your pussy.

You sighed at the warm feeling of his cum spurting along your walls, filling you until it dripped down and smeared along your thighs. But nothing compared to the sight of Tommy lost in his own bliss. His mouth dropped open, eyebrows pulling tight as a flush of red took over his face and chest. It would take him a while to come back to you, his mind buzzing from having cum so hard.

With a contented sigh, he pressed the rest of his weight on you. “I’m definitely not making it now,” he mumbled, smiling against your chest.

“I don’t need Joel banging on my front door,” you replied, shoving lightly at his shoulder.

He laughed, teeth sinking into the top of your breast, his cock twitching inside of you. “I’ll call him and tell him…”

“Hey sorry I can’t come in today. Got too busy fucking my girlfriend on the kitchen floor.”

“Perfect.”

“Tommy!”

His head raised, smile pulling so wide you could see the slight crinkle in the corner of his eyes. “I’ll say it in a nicer way.”

“You’ll tell him nothing at all.” You cupped his cheek, lips sliding against his softly. “You will get up, wash your jeans, get another cup of coffee, and get out of here before we incur the wrath of the other Miller.”

He sighed into your mouth. “I don’t want to go.”

Your heart twisted in your chest, the reminder of time once again filling you with a dread you could never escape. Neither of you wanted to part, too wrapped up in what could be. But eventually you would have to open your eyes and see what this was. Just two people who loved each other too much to give this their all. A pattern that would never stop.

“I don’t want you to go,” you admitted, finally letting that painful ache be seen by him.

“Then I won’t—”

“You have to.”

Tommy’s eyes searched yours, trying to find something in him he could fight for. Something that would assure him of that single question still residing on the tip of his tongue. He wanted forever with you. Wanted a house together, a dog or cat, the life that he watched his parents once have. He wanted you.

Before he could stop himself, his mouth was moving.

“I want to marry you.”

Your eyes went wide, heart beating rapidly in your chest. “What?”

“You heard me.”

Silence passed between you for a brief moment, the shock now being replaced with a sinking feeling. He wouldn’t be saying this if it were a different scenario. In fact you were certain that he wouldn’t even go near this topic on any other day.

“This is just the heat of the moment talking, Tommy,” you said, in an attempt to save yourself from the pain.

His eyes narrowed. “No it’s not.”

“You’re still inside me! You shouldn’t be saying this unless you’re sure that—” His hips grinding into yours cut you off as you gasped.

“You want me down on one knee I’ll do that honey. Want me to give you romance and dinner and everything in between? I’ll do it. But you’ve got to know I’m more serious now than I have ever been.”

“Tomm—”

“Before you can continue your argument—which I’ll let ya—let me go get the ring.”

Your jaw snapped shut, breath catching in your chest at the sight of his grin. “You…you have a ring?”

“Yes honey. I do.”

“Y–You’re serious?”

He nodded, his thumb brushing the top of your cheek. “I want forever with you. If you’ll have me.”

If you listened hard enough, you would have been able to hear your heart burst. The ache now vanished the longer you looked him in the eyes to see the truth. It was there you found it. Small hints of a future that you yearned for was now being offered to you and this time the promise he made would stick. Laughing, you pulled him down for a kiss, your legs hiking over his hips to keep him there with you.

“I’ll take that as a yes?” he asked, parting from you long enough to simply give you another chaste kiss.

This time it was your turn to nod, tears already streaming down your face. “Yes Tommy. I’ll have you. Forever.”

#tommy miller x f!reader #tommy miller x you #tommy miller x y/n #tommy miller x reader #tommy miller #tommy miller smut #the last of us #the last of us fic #my writing

1K notes · View notes

xaviers-star-tassel · 7 months

Text

⭐️ silent cry

✦ pairing: xavier / gn!reader

✦ genre: hurt to comfort

✦ warnings: probably badly written breakdown, feeling of emptiness and loneliness

✦ word count: 1.6k words

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ: there was never no need to hide your tears and feelings behind a fake smile. not when he was always there for you

⋆˙ ✦ note: as a huge stay and a silent cry lover, i couldn’t help myself but write this. this was probably the most fun i had while writing, though adding the lyrics into the story was harder than anticipated. stan stray kids y’all!! not proofread!

you had never been one to burden others with your feelings. perhaps it was that loud voice in your mind that kept on shouting to not annoy others around you, or just the fact that concerning people close to you filled you with guilt. you’ve always been told you were strong, and strong people don’t cry, right?

oh, how wrong everyone was. nobody knew that behind the smile you wore, behind every “i’m okay” you uttered, your poor heart was sobbing loudly. you dared not to show your vulnerability to anyone, not even the ones you considered friends, or even family. to be seen as disappointment was burdening your chest like an anvil.

that happy mask you always wore, simply to make others happy, seemed to shatter the moment you stepped foot in your dark room. the mental heaviness of your body and thoughts left you only sighing into the darkness, your frame harshly hitting the mattress. there was no joy in your eyes. you, who used to smile brightly, felt like you were slowly dying.

no one knew, yet a part of you felt glad. they didn’t deserve to be burdened by your troubles. even if no other person was there to listen to your nightly sobs and cries, you had made peace with that. for all you know, it was meant to be this way.

so there you were. in your room, dimly lit with the light radiating from your desk lamp, silently bawling your eyes out. your head laid on the pillow, the material of the sheet stained by the salty droplets of your tears. you weren’t aware of how long you had been crying, or why you even felt like it. it just happened, and there was no way to stop it. no matter how hard you tried, how much you tried to hold the tears in, it only made you cry more and harder.

your eyes burned, head was throbbing like it was repeatedly hit by a hard piece of metal. you could barely see the outlines of the furniture with how blurry your eyesight was. you wish you could just turn it off, to never feel again. or… to have someone you could cry to. but there wasn’t a person like that.

no one knew how you felt. at least, that was what you thought. one person knew all too well.

xavier was painfully aware of the pain in your eyes. the exhaustion behind your every smile. you were like a body without a soul, your gaze dull and almost empty. he wasn’t someone to notice other people’s feelings, moreover, he didn’t particularly care about the others.

but you weren’t just other person for him. you were special. he wanted to be your support, the shoulder to cry on. he was willing to be of help to you, no matter what would make you happy. truly happy.

yet you never approached him, and xavier couldn’t understand why. wouldn’t it be easier for you to let go of everything you held in? he would listen to your silent cry, that much was something he made clear to himself. your happiness was the most important thing to him, so why wasn’t it yours?

he was standing by your door, trying to listen to any sound coming from behind them. but your apartment was eerily quiet, as if you weren’t even there. but he knew better. he knew you were inside, suffering on your own.

as you laid on your bed, aggressively wiping the uncontrollable tears flowing down your cheeks, a knock erupted through the space of your abode. in panic, you jumped up, running to the bathroom to look at yourself.

the sight wasn’t pretty, it was anything but. your eyes were red, your hair a mess and face fully wet from tears. just the sight of yourself made you tear up even more. you bowed your head down, splashing handfuls of ice cold water on your face.

once you dried your face, you stumbled toward the door, possibly knocking something in the process. your hand made contact with the handle, and with a last deep breath, you swung the door open to reveal xavier.

“xavier! what are you doing here?” you mustered up the energy to smile brightly, hoping he would look over the red rim around your eyes.

you glanced down to notice a small box in his hand, and you immediately knew it were the macarons you liked the most. it was the packaging of it that gave away the content, and it made your heart flutter with genuine joy. even though it was a sparkle, it was enough.

“can i come in?” xavier asked with his usual calm tone.

the question surprised you, but you let him in anyway. with how dark your apartment was, his step to your room was careful, mindful of his surroundings. you quietly followed behind him, silently wishing he would explain his visit.

once you stood by your bed, xavier placed the box on the nightstand, right under the lit lamp before facing you. that was when you noticed the knot in between his eyebrows, not very far from a frown.

before you could say anything, his hand grabbed onto yours, giving it a gentle squeeze. your gaze fell down to your intertwined hands, then back at him. your eyes were round in surprise, and you barely bit back a gasp that threatened to fall from your mouth.

“why are you smiling when you don’t feel like it?” he whispered quietly, his free hand going up to cup your cheek.

he could feel the dried pathways of your tears beneath his palm. the cold water that you splashed your face with earlier didn’t get rid of the evidence of your tears fully, as it appeared. the pad of his thumb grazed ever so gently against your skin, drawing soothing circles over your cheekbone.

“what are you talking about? i’m okay,” you lied with a smile, though you could feel the tears prickling behind your eyelids.

“you always say that, but i can see how your heart sobs,” xavier’s voice was but a mere whisper as he drew you closer.

the forced smile began slowly faltering from your lips, and it was soon replaced by a quiver. without even realizing, a sob rippled through you, making it hard for you to hide your tears. one by one, like pearls falling from a torn necklace, tear droplets ran down your face. you couldn’t continue pretending to be alright, not when xavier was around.

a wave of relief washed over the man standing in front of you. he smiled softly as he engulfed you in a warm embrace, letting your tears stain his sweater. he didn’t mind. at least you weren’t alone in this, you had him now.

“don’t be the only one hurting,” he murmured into the crown of your head, earning a choked cry as a reply.

you tried to muster up a response, but nothing more than a sob came out. xavier shushed you gently, wordlessly saying that words weren’t needed.

careful with his movements, he settled on your bed. back leaning against the headboard, his arms reached out to pull you down on his lap. you had no energy to fight against it, in fact, you didn’t even want to. his warmth was soothing, and somehow nostalgic.

xavier’s arms held you tightly, like you’d slip away from his grasp if he let go. you cried and cried, body trembling and tears falling. loud sobs and pained whimpers filled the room, the dark place of all your deep sorrows.

even in his arms, it still hurt. why did it all have to hurt so much? and what was it that hurt? you weren’t even sure anymore. you couldn’t even tell if you had a reason to cry at all. it all felt useless, and utterly pointless. it felt unfair that xavier had to deal with your feelings, wrong even. you should push him away, right? you were a deepspace hunter, his partner. you were meant to be strong…right?

just as you were about to pull away, still crying heavily, you felt xavier’s slender fingers on the back of your head, gently pushing your head onto his chest.

“lean on me. i won’t let you go,” he whispered close to your ear, his lips brushing against your temple as he planted a gentle kiss on it.

xavier sat there with you, not uttering a sound as you let every tear out. his left hand gently caressed your hair, untangling the knots with a gentle touch, while the other drew soothing patterns on your back. his sweater was pretty much soaked by the time you were done, but he couldn’t care less. his favorite piece of clothing meant nothing compared to your happiness.

“thank you,” you managed to whisper, your voice hoarse and almost gone.

“you don’t have to thank me,” he shook his head, looking into your still teary eyes. “i’ll listen to your silent cry. always.”

his lips touched your forehead, calloused hands cupping your cheeks. he softly brushed the tear trails away, keeping his gaze on you. his touch was gentle, comforting. this man, the one who killed wanderers without mercy, treated you with upmost love and care. as if every crevice of your body was made of the most fragile glass.

“when you lose strength, i’ll hold you. i’ll say ‘it’s okay’ to you. just don’t cry alone, not when i’m here. not when i’m near,” xavier said in a quiet tone, leaning your head down to let you rest on his shoulder.

the heat of his body completely relaxed your muscles, putting your mind at ease. his chest slowly rose and fell as he breathed calmly, lulling you to sleep. your eyes began to close, and within a moment, you were asleep.

xavier didn’t leave your side, he wouldn’t dare. he stayed with you the whole night, occasionally waking up from his slumber to make sure you were sound asleep. as much as he valued his sleep, he valued you more.

he loved you more than anything.

#love and deepspace #love and deepspace fanfiction #l&ds #l&ds x reader #l&ds xavier #lads x reader #lads xavier #love and deepspace fluff #love and deepspace x reader #love and deepspace xavier #otome game #xavier fluff #xavier love and deepspace #xavier

271 notes · View notes

xxspringmelodyxx · 7 months

Text

Why Her and Not Me?

Gojo Satoru x F!Reader x Geto Suguru (Angst) part V

Hello my lovely readers! Here is part V! I also want to let you all know that I will be making multiple endings for this story because all of you deserve to be happy, so I will do just that🫶🏽 As for this part, I hope you all enjoy it! <333

If you want the other parts, they are in my masterlist :))))

As Toru wandered aimlessly down the quiet streets, his footsteps echoed hollowly against the pavement. Each step felt heavier than the last, weighed down by the burden of his own heartache. His mind was a whirlwind of emotions, his thoughts consumed by memories of you and the pain of your absence.

With each passing moment, the weight of your absence pressed down on him like a suffocating blanket, suffusing his every breath with a sense of longing and despair. He had tried to distract himself, to bury his feelings beneath a facade of indifference, but the truth was, he couldn’t escape the emptiness that gnawed at him from within. It was as if a part of him was missing, lost in the void that had opened up between you.

Toru barely slept, barely ate, barely did anything other than wander the streets in a daze, lost in a fog of sadness and regret. He knew he should take better care of himself, that he owed it to himself to try and move on, but the thought of you lingered in his mind like a ghost, haunting him at every turn.

Every corner he turned, every street he walked, seemed to taunt him with memories of happier times, of moments shared and laughter shared. But now, those memories felt like nothing more than cruel illusions, mocking him with their fleeting sweetness.

His heart felt heavy in his chest, a leaden weight that threatened to drag him down into the depths of despair. He had never felt so lost, so adrift, as he did in that moment, with the realization of just how much he missed you crashing over him like a tidal wave.

He wanted nothing more than to see you, to hear your voice, to feel your touch, but he knew that was impossible. You were out there somewhere, living your life without him, and the thought filled him with a profound sense of loneliness and regret.

And as he trudged on through the empty streets, his aura radiated a palpable aura of sadness and longing, a silent plea for the universe to bring you back to him.

——

Toru loved you, the truth was undeniable: his heart belonged to you, and you alone. He couldn’t continue to deceive himself, couldn’t continue to pretend that everything was okay when it clearly wasn’t. And so, with a heavy heart and a sense of resignation, Toru made the final decision to end things with Osaka.

Their relationship had once been filled with laughter and joy, but now it felt like nothing more than a charade, a hollow imitation of the love and passion he felt for you. He couldn’t bear the thought of leading Osaka on any longer, couldn’t bear the guilt of knowing that he was betraying her with every passing day.

And so, one fateful afternoon, Toru found himself sitting across from Osaka, his heart heavy with sorrow as he tried to find the words to explain why he couldn’t be with her anymore. She looked at him with confusion and hurt in her eyes, her brow furrowed in disbelief as she struggled to comprehend what he was saying.

—flashback—

As Toru sat across from Osaka in the bustling cafe, his heart weighed down by the heavy burden of the truth he was about to reveal, he couldn't help but notice the sadness in her eyes. It was as if she already knew what he was going to say, as if she had seen the signs and understood the depths of his feelings long before he had even admitted them to himself.

"I'm sorry, Osaka," Toru began, his voice barely above a whisper. "I... I can't do this anymore. I can't continue to pretend that everything is okay when it clearly isn't. I... I have feelings for someone else, and I can't ignore them any longer."

Osaka's eyes widened in understanding, her lips trembling slightly as she fought to hold back her emotions. "Is it... is it because of her?" she asked softly, her voice barely audible over the din of the crowded cafe.

Toru nodded, his heart aching with regret. "Yes," he admitted, his voice barely more than a choked whisper. "I've tried to deny it, tried to push aside my feelings, but... but I can't. I love her, Osaka. I've finally come to realize that everything that made me happy…everything that made me love life…it was all because of her… and I can't keep pretending that I don’t want her."

Tears welled up in Osaka's eyes, but she managed to nod, a small, sad smile playing at the corners of her lips. "I know," she whispered. "I've seen the way you look at her, the way your eyes light up whenever she's around. And as much as it hurts, I... I understand."

Toru's heart clenched with guilt at the pain he saw in Osaka's eyes, the knowledge that he was causing her so much hurt and heartache nearly overwhelming him. But amidst the sorrow and regret, there was a sense of relief, a weight lifting from his shoulders as he finally spoke the truth he had been hiding for so long.

"I'm so sorry, Osaka," he murmured, reaching out to take her hand in his. "I never meant to hurt you, but I... I can't keep pretending that my feelings for you are enough. You deserve someone who can give you their whole heart, and I... I can't do that."

Osaka squeezed his hand gently, her gaze soft and understanding. "I know," she whispered. "And all I want is for you to be happy, Toru. Even if it's not with me."

And in that moment, Toru felt a sense of gratitude wash over him, a deep appreciation for the kindness and understanding that Osaka had shown him. He knew that he would never forget her, never forget the love and support she had given him during their time together.

As Osaka got up to leave, her shoulders hunched with grief but her head held high with dignity, Toru couldn't help but feel a sense of awe at the strength and resilience she possessed. And as he watched her walk away, he knew that he would always be grateful for her understanding and kindness, even though his heart belonged elsewhere.

—end of flashback—

That happened almost three weeks ago, and here he was, still down as ever because he still hasn’t gotten a chance to speak with you. As he rounded a corner, his gaze fell upon a familiar figure sitting alone on a bench in the park. It was you, your silhouette illuminated by the soft glow of the streetlights, and for a moment, Toru’s heart leaped in his chest.

Without a second thought, he changed direction and made his way towards you, his steps quickening with a sense of urgency. He needed to see you, to talk to you, to finally get some answers to the questions that had been plaguing him for months now.

Relief washed over him at the sight of you, but it quickly turned to dismay as he couldn’t help but notice the way your shoulders tensed, as if bracing for impact. His heart clenched at the sight, the realization that you were actively avoiding him hitting him like a ton of bricks. He had hoped that seeing you again would ease the ache in his chest, but instead, it only seemed to exacerbate it.

His footsteps faltered for a moment before he mustered back the courage to approach you. Each step felt like a heavy weight dragging him closer to the inevitable confrontation he had been dreading. He cleared his throat nervously, his heart pounding in his chest as he finally reached your side.

“Y/n,” he called out softly, his voice trembling with emotion. “It’s… it’s been so long since we’ve talked. I’ve missed you.”

You glanced up briefly, your eyes flitting over him before quickly returning to the ground. You instantly began to feel your heart race. You cursed yourself mentally, hoping that all of those feelings you had for him were gone once and for all, but to your surprise, they weren’t.

“Has it? I didn’t even notice.” You spoke plainly, going on your phone. Even you knew that was a low blow.

Your reaction was almost imperceptible, a slight shift in posture that spoke volumes. Toru’s heart sank at your words, his mind racing with a million different questions and doubts. What had he done wrong? Why were you treating him like this? Had he somehow pushed you away without realizing it?

“Y/n,” he repeated, his voice pleading, “please, I need to know what’s been going on with you. I miss you so much, and it’s killing me not knowing why you’ve been avoiding me.”

But you remained stubbornly silent, refusing to meet his gaze or acknowledge his presence. Toru’s frustration boiled beneath the surface, his patience wearing thin as he struggled to contain his emotions.

“Y/n, come on,” he begged, his voice cracking with emotion. “I can’t take this anymore. I need to know why you’ve been ignoring me. What did I do wrong? What did I do to deserve this?”

You flinched at his words, the guilt gnawing at your conscience as you struggled to find the right words. But before you could respond, Toru pressed on, his voice growing more desperate with each passing moment.

“I thought we were friends, Y/n,” he continued, his voice trembling with emotion. “I thought we meant something to each other. Maybe…even more than that… But if I was wrong, if I’ve just been fooling myself this whole time, then please, just tell me. Tell me the truth, even if it hurts. Because obviously, you’ve been ignoring me for the last several months and I’m getting tired of it!”

Tears welled up in your eyes as you met Toru’s gaze, the pain and confusion written plainly across his face. You opened your mouth to speak, to tell him everything, but the words caught in your throat, choked back by the weight of your own fears.

Toru’s eyes searched yours, pleading for some semblance of an answer, but you turned away, unable to bear the intensity of his gaze any longer. And in that moment of vulnerability, you felt a surge of anger rise up within you, a resentment born from years of unrequited love and silent suffering. After all this time, he still doesn’t know about how you felt. How much you loved him. How much he hurt you that day. And how much it continued to hurt every time you saw him with Osaka.

“I’m sorry, Toru,” you spoke, your voice barely above a whisper. “I can’t do this right now. I need some time alone.”

But Toru refused to let you off that easily, his frustration boiling over as he grabbed your arm, forcing you to face him. “No, Y/n,” he insisted, his voice tinged with desperation. “We need to talk about this. I can’t just let you walk away like this, not when it’s tearing me apart inside.”

You tried to pull away, to free yourself from his grasp, but Toru held on tight, his grip unyielding as he searched your eyes for some sign of understanding.

”Let me go, Satoru. Now.” You spoke to him, your voice completely monotone and full of venom.

Toru’s heart cracked at the sound of his name rolling off your tongue with such detachment. It was as if you were a stranger, a cold wind blowing through the warm familiarity you two once shared.

“Y/n, please,” Toru pleaded, his voice barely above a whisper. “Don’t shut me out like this. I can’t bear it.”

But you remained resolute, your gaze fixed on the ground as if the earth held the answers to all your troubles. Toru’s heart ached at the sight, the pain of your rejection like a physical blow to his chest.

“Please, just talk to me,” Toru implored, his voice trembling with emotion. “Tell me what I did wrong. Tell me why you’ve been avoiding me.”

Your silence was deafening, a wall of ice erected between you and Toru that seemed impossible to breach. But before he could do anything further, you spoke again, your voice cutting through the silence like a knife. “Let me go, or else.”

Toru recoiled as if struck, the pain in your words lancing through him like a blade. He had never heard you address him so formally, so coldly, and it sent a shiver down his spine. He let go of your hand, seeing you begin to walk away. That is when he snapped.

“I…I don’t understand,” Toru stammered, his voice rising as his frustration began to take hold of his emotions. “What did I do to deserve this? What did I do to make you hate me so much?” He yelled, tears beginning to fall down his face.

Suddenly, you stopped in your tracks, your heart beginning to break as well. The tears welled up in your eyes as you met Toru’s gaze, the pain and anguish written plainly across your face.

Toru’s heart clenched at the sight of your tears, each drop a dagger in his already wounded heart. He watched helplessly as you approached him, your finger trembling as you pointed it accusingly at him.

“Y-you wanna know why I’ve been acting this way? Why I’ve been ignoring you this whole fucking time?!” you yelled, your voice raw with emotion.

Toru’s breath caught in his throat as he waited for your answer, his heart pounding with anticipation and dread.

You took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself as the weight of your words hung heavy in the air between you. “It’s because of you, Toru and well…me and my stupid feelings,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. “Because of what you said to me that day…about loving Osaka.”

Toru’s eyes widened in surprise, a flicker of understanding dawning in their depths. He opened his mouth to speak, but you held up a trembling hand, silencing him before he could interrupt.

“I know you probably didn’t mean to hurt me when you told me you loved Osaka,” you continued, your words tumbling out in a rush. “But it… it broke my heart, Toru. It shattered me into a million pieces, and I didn’t know how to put myself back together again.”

Toru listened in stunned silence as you poured out your heart, each word a dagger to his own soul. He had never realized the depth of your feelings for him, the pain you had been silently carrying all this time.

You swallowed hard, the lump in your throat threatening to choke off your words. How could you possibly explain the depth of your feelings for Toru, the longing and heartache that had consumed you for so long? How could you make him understand the pain of watching him love someone else, knowing that he would never return your affections?

“But It’s about more than just what happened with Osaka,” you finally admitted, your voice trembling with emotion. “It’s about how much I loved you, Toru. For so long, I’ve loved you with every fiber of my being. There wasn’t a day that went by where I didn’t think of you, where I didn’t want to be with you.”

You continued.

“That’s why I would always make you your favorite desserts. I knew you loved them and so I made them to make you feel loved…to make you feel happy…to hopefully help you understand just how much I cared for and loved you…but you never got the idea.” Your heart was breaking more and more with each word you spoke. “You never once sat back and wondered why I did all of that for you. Of course I did it because I enjoy it…but it made it even more enjoyable knowing that it was all for you. You were the reason I looked forward to each new day. The reason as to what made everything better. And it… it hurts so much to know that you don’t feel the same way about me. And what’s worse is that…I still love you…even though I’ve tried to force those feelings away…after months of telling myself I don’t love you anymore, convincing myself of those words…I knew it was nothing but a lie.” You finished, still looking at him, seeing his widened eyes.

Tears welled up in your eyes as you looked up at him, the floodgates of your emotions bursting open with a force you couldn’t contain. You felt exposed and vulnerable, laid bare before Toru.

”Y/n…I-“

Gently, he squeezed your hand, silently conveying his remorse and his determination to make things right. He knew he had a long road ahead of him, but he was willing to do whatever it took to earn back your trust and your love.

“I-I never knew,” Toru choked out, his voice thick with emotion. “I never realized…” he stammered, his voice choking with emotion. “I never meant to hurt you, I swear. I never wanted to cause you pain.”

You shook your head, tears streaming down your cheeks unchecked. “I know, Toru. I know you didn’t mean to,” you said softly. “But the truth is, you did. And I’ve spent so long trying to come to terms with that, trying to move on and forget about you, but I just… I can’t.”

But you shook your head, a bitter laugh escaping your lips. “But It doesn’t matter now, Toru,” you said, your voice tinged with sadness and resignation. “What’s done is done. You are with Osaka…and there is nothing I can do about it.”

“I-I broke up with Osaka,” Toru interrupted, his voice loud and clear.

You felt your heart skip a beat as Toru’s words hung in the air, the weight of his confession hitting you on the head. You blinked, trying to process the sudden shift in the conversation, the unexpected turn of events leaving you feeling disoriented and confused.

“What do you mean?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper, your heart racing in your chest. “Why would you break up with Osaka?”

As Toru’s voice wavered with emotion, you could sense the weight of his words hanging heavy in the air, each syllable laden with meaning and significance. He took a deep breath, steeling himself to articulate the whirlwind of thoughts and feelings that had consumed him in recent months.

“It was after you stopped talking to me,” Toru confessed, his voice barely above a whisper, his eyes searching yours for understanding. “I couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat, I couldn’t do anything…I was a mess, Y/n. And I couldn’t figure out why until I realized…it was because of you. I realized that I needed you.”

You felt a pang of guilt twist in your chest at his words, the realization that your actions had caused him so much pain weighing heavily on your conscience. But even as you grappled with your own emotions, you couldn’t help but hang on to his every word, desperate to understand the depth of his feelings.

“I kept replaying everything in my mind, every moment we’ve shared together,” Toru continued, his voice growing stronger with each passing word. “And it hit me like a bus. I’m in love with you, Y/n. I’m so in love with you that it hurts. Everywhere I turn, it always brings up a memory of us together.”

The raw honesty in Toru’s confession washed over you, leaving you reeling in its wake. You had never imagined that he could feel that way about you, never dared to entertain the possibility that your feelings for him might be reciprocated.

“I tried to hide my feelings for you while I was with Osaka…to pretend that everything was fine….but I can’t keep pretending anymore, Y/n. I can’t keep hiding how I feel.”

As Toru poured his heart out to you, baring his soul in a way you had never seen before, you felt a surge of conflicting emotions wash over you. Part of you wanted to throw yourself into his arms, to finally acknowledge the love that had been simmering beneath the surface for so long. But another part of you hesitated, still grappling with the scars of past heartbreaks, unsure if you were ready to take that leap of faith again.

You felt a lump form in your throat as Toru’s words washed over you, the enormity of what he was saying sinking in.

“I love you so much,Y/n… and I am so sorry that it took me this long to figure it out” He started, his hands becoming clammy.

Toru reached out tentatively, his hand hovering in the air between you as if unsure whether to touch you or not. “Please, Y/n,” he pleaded, his voice breaking with emotion. “Give me a chance to make things right. I’ll do anything, I swear.”

You looked up at him, your eyes filled with a mixture of pain and longing. “I don’t know if I can, Toru. You really hurt me, even if you didn’t mean to.” you admitted, your voice barely audible above the soft hum of the evening breeze.

“Plus…Suguru and I have been getting close…and I…I think I’m falling for him as well. I can’t explain it, but there’s something about him that draws me to him, something I can’t ignore. So not only do I still have feelings for you…but I also have feelings for him…and I’m just so lost and confused. I don’t know what to do anymore.”

The weight of your confession hung heavy in the air, the silence stretching between you like a chasm.

When you finally mentioned Suguru, Toru’s heart clenched with a mixture of jealousy and resignation. He had suspected as much, had seen the way you looked at Suguru when you thought no one was watching, the subtle shifts in your demeanor whenever he was around. But hearing you say the words out loud, admitting to falling for another, felt like a blow to his chest.

But he pushed back those feelings as he heard and saw your current state. He felt a surge of guilt wash over him as he saw you. This wasn’t about him right now; it was about you and the pain he had caused you. He couldn’t bear the thought of being the source of your hurt, and the realization weighed heavily on his heart.

He refused to give up hope. He knew that he had to earn your forgiveness, that it wouldn’t come easily or quickly. But he was willing to do whatever it took to make things right between you, to prove to you that he was worthy of your love.

“However,” you started, still looking into his eyes.

“I know that I can’t keep ignoring you like this. And…I have been missing you for some time as well. So…how about we just start back at square one and see where that takes us?”

Toru listened intently, his heart pounding with anticipation as you spoke. He understood the gravity of your words, the weight of the pain he had caused you. But as you suggested starting anew, a spark of hope ignited within him, lighting up the darkness that had clouded his heart.

He nodded, a sense of determination coursing through him. "I would like that…a lot actually," he replied, his voice soft yet resolute. "Let's start fresh, take it one step at a time."

As the words left his lips, a sense of relief washed over you. Despite the hurt and the uncertainty, you couldn't ignore the flicker of hope that blossomed within you. Maybe, just maybe, there was a chance for the two of you to find your way back to each other. To love and cherish one another and be one.

With a tentative smile, you reached out and squeezed Toru's hand, feeling the warmth and strength it offered, missing how good it felt. As you two walked side by side, the weight of the past lifting from your shoulders, you felt a renewed sense of optimism fill your heart. Maybe this wasn't the end of your story with Toru, but rather the beginning of a new chapter, one filled with hope, forgiveness, and the promise of a brighter and happier future.

_____________

Taglist: (If you’d like to be added, just let me know with the username you’d like to be notified and Ill gladly get you added <3, again, thank you for all the support)

@creolequeen11210

@pompompompompompompom

@xccharlie

@ritsatoru

@jerml

@melancholyhill5

@deeeeexx

@aishies-stuff

@crystalorbb

@smolbeanzzz

@mel1mak

@hojoslutoru

@artist1936

@1800imgay

@yourst3pm0mmy

@getou0309

@starlightanyaaa

@suki-senpai7j7

@scintilla-morningstar

@strxxberries

@bubblysunwoosworld

@roscoctals99

@itsmenillo

@v4ill

@luciledreamz

@ichikanu

@lolmais

@rh-tg1

@username23345

@amplsblog

@reesesnieces

@allie-jay

@pagetheidiot

@higuchislut

@mellowblizzardsoul

178 notes · View notes