#but I think even more importantly than PHYSICAL traits being gender-neutral is the fact that MORAL traits are ALSO independent of gender

[birdmenmanga]

"suletta's too cute to be a gundam pilot" well clearly you're not ready for the new era of women's wrongs that g-witch is ushering in

[hwanscung]

is that [ JU JI-HOON ] no, that’s just [ HWAN HYUN JOON ]. [ HE/HIM ] is [ THIRTY-FIVE ] years old and is a [ COO OF HWAN CORPORATION ]. rumor has it they’ve been in town for [THREE DAYS ]. on a good day, they’re [ INGENIOUS & URBANE ]. but watch out! they can also be [ DOMINEERING & INSENSITIVE ]. [ POWER IS POWER BY SZA & THE WEEKND ] plays in my head whenever i think of them. can’t wait to see them around springhill!

hellooo, it’s me li with my second bby. joon is the elder brother of lee and i’m apologizing for him now because watch out, he can be an asshole. not that he doesn’t have his reasons. this is also my first Korean bby i’m actually really nervous about it and i’m sorry if i messed anything up!!

[ triggers: high-risk pregnancy tw & death tw ]

GENERAL INFORMATION.

NAME →hwan hyun joon AGE → thirty-five DATE OF BIRTH → april 13th, 1984 PLACE OF BIRTH → seoul, south korea EDUCATION → business law degree from harvard & seoul school of law ZODIAC → aries GENDER → male LANGUAGES → korean, english, mandarin, & japanese   ORIENTATION → demisexual, demiromantic RELIGIOUS VIEWS →buddhist ( & hints of folk religion passed down )

PHYSICAL ATTRIBUTES.

FACE CLAIM → ju ji-hoon HEIGHT → 6'2" WEIGHT → 172 lbs HAIR COLOR → black EYE COLOR → brown BODY TYPE → slender, fit

FAMILIAL INFORMATION.

FATHER →  hwan jung-soo MOTHER → lee mi-kyong YOUNGER BROTHER → lee hyun hwan ( westernized name ) YOUNGER SISTER → hwan ( up to player )

WIFE  → oh seo-yeon ( deceased )

PERSONALITY.

POSITIVE TRAITS → ambitious, ingenious, urbane, & calculated NEGATIVE TRAITS → hidebound, domineering, sarcastic, & insensitive INTERESTS → reading, cooking, boxing, & cars DISLIKES → being lied to by those he trusts, cleaning, & coffee AESTHETICS → pressed designer suits, the sound of rain on the roof, the way the city looks from a plane window that’s just taken off, unanswered texts left on read, & a glass of scotch after a long day. MORAL ALIGNMENT → lawful neutral PERSONALITY TYPE → INTJ-A ( the architect )

BACKSTORY.

joon was born in south korea to a wealthy family who expected nothing less than greatness. the family-owned their own very prosperous natural resource company and they’d been grooming their eldest son to take it over long before he could even understand how any part of the business worked.

just before he turned thirteen, his family made arrangements to expand their company and move to the states. his pregnant mother left for new york not long after where she gave birth to his younger brother lee. the family wasn’t reunited until the following year in their new home in the states. soon after came the final addition to the family, a baby girl.

growing up, joon was expected to provide nothing but the absolute best example for his younger siblings and failure was never an acceptable option. he was without question what others would refer to as the golden child and it caused a rift between joon and his siblings. that as well as the large gap in their ages.

there’s almost nothing joon is better at than being obedient to his parents. especially his father. all his father ever needed to do was call and his son would be there, which only led to his loyalty and obedience being taken advantage of time and time again.

he’d always been quite intelligent and had a thirst for knowledge that couldn’t be quenched with just any ordinary business degree. he wanted to be an asset to his families company in ways others couldn’t or wouldn’t be. he wanted to have an edge over everyone, even his father in the end. after graduation joon attended harvard where he studied business law before continuing his education back in south korea at seoul national university school of law. after law school, he stayed in south korea for many years to handle his family's affairs from there at their headquarters, happier to be in the country he truly considered his home as opposed to the states. it was also the place his wife preferred to live.

while studying in seoul, joon met the love of his life. she was the first one to really get him to open up and even want to change a little. of course, not in any serious way, but around seo-yeon he was open to the possibility and eager to more open-minded like she’d always been. she made everything in his life seem light and easy; she was perfect. too perfect for this world, he came to learn.

two years after their marriage, at twenty-eight, joon was called away to the states on business by his father, but he was more than just hesitant to leave his very pregnant wife. initially, the eldest soon refused--the first and only time he’d ever said no to his father. but it was something that didn’t sit well and less than three hours later he was flying first class to jfk.

seo-yeon went into early labor the day after joon left south korea and wasn’t expected to return until after the weekend, a whole three days away. upon his return to seoul, joon found that his life was in nothing more than shambles. his wife had been taken to the hospital, but it already proved to be too late for their unborn child and then to make matters worse, seo-yeon died on the operating table due to complications from the cesarean section. joon knew the high-risks she was facing due to the pregnancy but made the choice to leave her on her own anyway and it’s something he’s never been able to forgive himself for. if he’d stayed with her, he could have made sure she made it to hospital in time. he could have saved his family still.

joon moved back to the states the following year to rejoin the rest of the hwan family as he found the idea of staying in the house they’d made home without those he loved most to be too unbearable. he threw himself into his work more than he ever had before but the seed of resentment he felt towards his father began to grow slowly over the years without him even truly realizing it. unable to stop himself from thinking about how his father had left him with no other option except to abandon his wife. it was something he simply couldn’t forget. or forgive.

outwardly, things certainly seemed to be business as usual for refined young man, but internally a dangerous storm was brewing. though as time past, joon learned to control his anger and emotions once more, the thing he’d been so good at before he’d met seo-yeon. he began to box as a way to channel his frustrations and has since become very invested in it. 

joon will still do whatever his father or mother asks of him, but there are times where he now questions those things and when the requests do come in they’re far and few in between. the man can’t help but wonder if it’s because his father truly feels guilty or sorry or merely because his father can sense just how far joon as drifted from the rightful place at his side. just before his thirtieth birthday, his father promoted him to the chief operating officer of the company and joon took the opportunity to immerse himself in work even further than he already has, which was rather difficult all things considered. it wasn’t long after this that his mother truly began to worry about the well-being and mental state of her eldest son. she even started to try and find him a new wife. something he’s not been overly eager about dealing with.

the years began to pass quickly, most of them blurring together for joon in a rather unhealthy way which left even his father concerned. his parents decided to try and put some space between the company and their heir who was set to inherit it all by asking him to track down his younger brother and to find out what exactly was going on. and joon knew he could do nothing but agree to help. after all, lee was his family even if they’d never exactly treated each other as such. 

IMPORTANT FACTS.

being the very traditional korean that he is, he doesn't like being called joon by those who are not family members or close friends. he often corrects people of this when in the states and will grow to dislike those who disregard his correction. he prefers mr. hwan or by people he knows and if comfortable with they may call him hyun joon. (( call him just joon multiple times and i make no promises of his reactions lmao ))

he’s always preferred to work alone and finds he can get more done this way. a big part of why he enjoyed working from seoul rather than the states.

he has a shiba inu named baek and he loves that dog more than anything else in his life at the moment. he was the last gift from seo-yeon.

he is very perceptive and has always been good at sensing another's kibun and also how to use it to his own benefit when it comes to business meetings and personal gain. but his abuse of his nunchi is something that has gotten him into LOTS trouble with his father for a long as he can remember as his father always like to remind him it’s quite the opposite of harmonious

living in the states definitely made him more insensitive to others feelings and more importantly their kibun because it wasn’t something that mattered in the same way in the states like it did back home. it’s probably the only real american/western thing about him

he’s quite the cocky and an arrogant person, ( but when you’re raised being told you’re place is above others, it’s pretty dang hard not to think like that ). 

he still travels back to korea often for work, but his trips are usually short-lived and he doesn’t do anything really except work when he’s there. 

for the time being, joon is just staying at a local hotel as he doesn’t expect to have to stay around long. ( ohhh how that will change lol )

WANTED CONNECTIONS.

executive assistant

friends

rivals

colleagues

i’m down for anything, i just can’t think of too many atm! 

[amaramonette]

is that [ ISABEL DURANT ]? no, that’s just [ AMARA MONETTE ]. [ SHE/HER ] is [ TWENTY-SIX ] years old and is a [ PROFESSIONAL FIGURE SKATER ]. rumor has it they’ve been in town for [ NEARLY THEIR WHOLE LIFE ]. on a good day, they’re [ PERCEPTIVE & CULTURED ]. but watch out! they can also be [ SPITEFUL & POSSESSIVE ]. [ MORAL OF THE STORY by ASHE ] plays in my head whenever i think of them. can’t wait to see them around spring hill!

hellllooo! i’m li and i’m pretty excited to be here and start using my new bby. she’s a bit of a mash-up of a few different muses that i absolutely love so i’m very stoked to see how this goes lmao. i apologize now for this bio, it took me fivever and it's hella long but like everything i do is long. ( sorry not sorry<3 ). i am also down for alllll the connections, the more drama and angst the better lol. hit me up if you’d like to plot or like this and i’ll come to you!

[ triggers: bad parenting tw, mental abuse tw, ]

GENERAL INFORMATION.

NAME → amara quinn monette NICKNAMES → mara, am, or ams AGE → twenty-six DATE OF BIRTH → october 28th PLACE OF BIRTH → springhill, nj, usa EDUCATION  → high school ged ZODIAC → scorpio GENDER → female ORIENTATION → pansexual, demiromantic RELIGIOUS VIEWS → atheist 

PHYSICAL ATTRIBUTES.

FACE CLAIM → isabel durant HEIGHT → 5'4" WEIGHT → 128 lbs HAIR COLOR → blonde EYE COLOR → blue BODY TYPE → thin, athletic

FAMILIAL INFORMATION.

FATHER →  utp monette ( WC ) MOTHER → evelyn monette  YOUNGER SISTER → utp monette ( WC )

EX-HUSBAND  → utp ( WC )

PERSONALITY.

POSITIVE TRAITS → venturesome, determined, cultured, & perceptive 
NEGATIVE TRAITS → possessive, spiteful, dramatic, & oversensitive
 INTERESTS → dancing, cooking, photography, flower pressing, yoga, dogs, & caffeine 
DISLIKES → humblebraggers and name droppers, people who talk during movies, people who say ‘you look tired’, & willful ignorance  AESTHETICS → being up before the sun, the sound of skates on fresh ice, a vintage polaroid camera, a delicious smell coming from the kitchen, & a strong red wine.  
MORAL ALIGNMENT → chaotic neutral PERSONALITY TYPE → ENFP-T ( the campaigner )

BACKSTORY.

❦ amara monette was born and raised in spring hill, new jersey to a marine biologist and local contractor. her family has always been fairly well known in town as her father has been quite a pillar in the community and his company has done a lot of work for the town. her only sibling is six years younger than her and the two sisters have been like oil and water since the beginning and have never been able to see eye to eye on anything.

❦ the monette family dynamics could easily be categorized as dysfunctional but in amara’s eyes, that term is putting it lightly. there’s never been any doubt in the eldest daughter’s mind that she was an unplanned accident—a fact she’d gotten her mother to admit after heavy plying with wine when she was only a young teen. “if we didn’t have you, I could still be doing what I love.” her mother blathered drunkenly.

❦ the only person who didn’t treat her like that—as though she’d ruined their life—was her father, though due to his work, he spent more time out of the house than with his family. unlike her mother or sister, the one thing her father always did was encourage amara. remind her that no matter what she was striving for, it was possible and just within reach.

❦ the bond amara shared with her father was special, just as the bond her sister shared with their mother was special. though her sister also shared a loving, positive bond with BOTH of their parents and what amara shared with their mother was anything but positive or loving.

❦ at the age of four, her mother enrolled her in ballet classes hoping to teach the rambunctious little girl some discipline. much to her mother’s surprise, mara fell in love with dance immediately. but ballet, or dance in any such capacity, hadn’t been apart of her mother's ultimate plan for her. the following year, despite all the crying and protests from her daughter, the wannabe ballerina found herself being taught to ice skate.

❦ she didn’t particularly enjoy skating, not like the other girls she trained with did, but amara succeeded in ways many of them couldn’t over the years. her indifference to the sport and at being the best had given her an edge above the competition. and the more naturally gifted she proved to be at the sport, the further her mother pushed amara and the more intense the training became. as she got older she managed to convince her mother to let her enroll in dance classes once more if only to help in the long run, she’d say. it was in those moments, those classes, that she felt most at peace. as though she’d found just where she was meant to be—or what she ought to be doing. she’s never stopped dancing since. 

❦ at the age of nine, her mother had her pulled out of school to be privately tutored so she could spend more time on the ice—her mother only had one goal and she never let amara forget it. the olympics. though before her mother had the chance to remove her from school, the blonde had already made the best friend she could ever ask for. ( WC )

❦ it wasn’t until years later, at thirteen, she discovered that her mother had been forcing her down the same path she’d been set on as a girl. whereas her younger sister found herself free to pursue whatever interests she’d like, amara found herself on a rink shaped prison. and the unwavering pressure her mother applied only made it feel as though her ice space was forever shrinking.

❦ amara spent a majority of her youth and teens training, both on and off the ice, and whatever little free time she had left was spent with her small group of friends. friends her mother disliked for the most part and did all she could to keep her daughter away from. forcing amara to spend time with the other skaters in her class at every turn. not that she’d ever been able to fit in with them even if she wanted to. ( WCs )

❦ becoming a legal adult and dreaming of what it would finally be like to have the freedom she’d always longed for was just about all the blonde could do to keep moving forward. to keep her mother from truly bringing him down. but the relentless pressure from the cold-hearted woman and the fact that she showed no signs of letting up or letting amara walk away if she so desired to caused her to finally crack just a few months shy of her eighteenth birthday.

❦ like a thief in the night, amara disappeared from her parents home taking as many of her belongings with her as she could carry, save for all her skating gear. she spent several weeks sleeping on the couches of different friends while hiding from her mother and whatever wrath she intended to unleash for her missing so much ice time and standing up the coaches her parents paid plenty of money for.

❦ it was in those weeks of solitude that amara discovered what skating actually meant to her and just how much she still needed it in her life. the seventeen-year-old realized that she wasn’t as ready to hang up her skates as she previously thought and that there was still a thing or two she could learn from being on the rink.

❦ amara returned to the ice on the sole condition that her mother would let her do things her own way and would stop projecting her own regrets and more importantly wants on her daughter. things began to look up after that for the monette family in more ways than one and dysfunction that had once been so deeply rooted began to dissolve away just a bit. ( not so much between the sister lol, mostly just amara and her mom )

❦ she moved out on her own not long after, eager to have a life of her own as best she could, but being as clueless and willing to trust as she was, amara made many mistakes and gave her heart away much too easily which only led to it being crushed repeatedly by those who weren’t worthy of safeguarding it, to begin with. ( WCs )

❦ at twenty-one, after only dating for about a year amara married the man she believed was the one. however, it didn’t take her long to see just how incredibly wrong she was and the relationship was more toxic than anything else. she filed for divorce ten months later. ( WC )

❦ amara continued skating in hopes of making the olympic team—but this time the dream truly belonging to her, which seemed to pay off as she managed to do so successfully twice in 2014 and again in 2018. the blonde got a bronze medal in 2014 and didn’t place at all in 2018 after taking a nasty fall during her long program and making the mistake of not taking enough overall risks to make up for it. spooked after the olympic fall that nearly ended her entire career, amara decided to stop skating at a competitive level.

❦ in the following years, amara found herself joining several different national ice-skating tours but couldn’t quite shake the feeling of how far she’d fallen and how demeaning her life now seemed, skating for nothing more than mere amusement. unsatisfied and upset upon coming to the conclusion there was nothing else she could truly exceed at, amara took up the mantle that countless other incredible skaters also had, coach. a rewarding job that’s more or less left her at peace. 

OTHER IMPORTANT INFO.

❦ growing up, she was the most curious of children, constantly asking questions and wanting to know more about anything and everything. as the years passed, her curiosity never quite fizzled out as her parents as hoped. instead, the small blonde just became more confident in her ability to get the answers she sought and more determined to have it when a person wasn’t forthright with her. it’s something that leads her to trouble too often as she’s brought on a whole new meaning to the idea of questioning authority.

❦ amara can be quite a master of deceit and manipulation if she’d like. she gets a sort of amusement out of playing games with people and confusing them, especially with those she doesn’t get on well with. she definitely has a few different faces and is very particular about when she wears which face. her sweet face, where she’s likely to try and charm the pants off people, is the face she wears most of the time when interacting with strangers or just the general public. few people have ever seen her at her truest and those who have are either the ones she trusts most or the ones who’ve crossed her in unforgivable ways.

❦ anyone who knows amara is aware of how jealous or possessive she can be of those in her life she cares for. she’s never been able to quite help herself and isn’t afraid to make her feelings known when she feels her relationships have been infringed upon in any way. making friends and building relationships has always been something she’s struggled with as her childhood wasn’t normal in any sense. all her time after school was spent training—on or off the ice. and when she wasn’t training she was home with her family who she didn’t quite mesh with.

WANTED CONNECTIONS.

childhood best friend

ex-husband

father

younger sister

old friends —

new friends 

rivals 

exes / flings 

i’m here for it allll!

[bexwlsn]

an introduction.

BASIC

NAME: Rebecca Aaliyah Wilson (neé Jackson) NICKNAMES: Becca, Bex, Beck. Nowadays, she’s solely called Rebecca. AGE: Twenty-eight. BIRTHDAY: January 1st, 1991. SPECIES: Human, GENDER: Cis!female. PRONOUNS: She/her.

FAMILY

MOTHER: Rachel Jackson. FATHER: Marcus Jackson. PARENTS: Together, stable. Currently living in the West side. FAMILY:   SIBLINGS: Two brothers, both older.

PHYSICAL ATTRIBUTES

FACE CLAIM: Nathalie Emmanuel. RACE/ETHNICITY: Half Dominican, half white English. NATIONALITY: American. HEIGHT: Five foot six inches. BUILD: Slim/athletic. HAIR: Curly/coily, grown out. Dark brown. FACIAL HAIR: None. HAIR COLOR: Brown. EYE COLOR: Brown. DOMINANT HAND: Left. ACCENT: Basic American. ALLERGIES: Walnuts and cats.

LIFESTYLE

RESIDES: A penthouse apartment on the East side. BORN: West side, in a hospital. RAISED:  West side, in a single childhood home. VEHICLE: Formerly a beat up pickup truck she shared with her father, now a Mercedes Benz and a Range Rover. PHONE: The latest iPhone model, always. LAPTOP/COMPUTER: Again, whatever the latest and best is. PETS: None, but she’s always wanted a dog. Her husband says they shed too much.

HIGH SCHOOL EDUCATION: Graduated. COLLEGE EDUCATION: Undergraduate/Bachelor’s in pre-med, one year of medical school. CAREER: Unemployed. EMPLOYER: N/A. OTHER: N/A.

POLITICAL AFFILIATION: The East side, formerly the Anarchists. RELIGION: None, presents as non-denominational Christian for her husband’s sake. BELIEFS: Nothing, really. CRIMES: Trespassing and burglary as a child/teen, none recently. DRUGS: None currently, smoked pot in high school. SMOKES: Will sneak the occasional cigarette, has smoked since she was 15. ALCOHOL: Yes, but never to excess. DIET: Currently a vegetarian, used to be horrible.

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Heterosexual. MARTIAL STATUS: Married. CHILDREN: None, but currently being pressured to. AVAILABILITY: Is currently having an affair. LOOKING FOR: Someone to truly love her.

LANGUAGES: English, Spanish.

PHOBIAS: Spiders. HOBBIES: Nothing, she’d bored all the time. TRAITS: Dishonest, obedient, negative. SOCIAL MEDIA: All of them you can think of, perfectly curated.

FAVOURITE

LOCATION: Her childhood home, though it’s not admitted. GAME: She doesn’t have time for games. MUSIC: Classical nowadays, though she was a heavy metal fiend in high school. SHOWS: Now she watched mostly cooking shows, but not much else. MOVIES: She doesn’t really watch movies anymore, but she used to LOVE the Fast and the Furious franchise. Anything with explosions. RADIO STATION: She doesn’t listen to the radio, she has all the subscription services. FOOD:  It’s really macaroni and cheese, but she tells people it’s spinach. BEVERAGE:  Hot black tea. COLOR: Creme or burgundy.

CHARACTER

MORAL ALIGNMENT: True neutral.  WESTERN ZODIAC: Capricorn, cancer moon.  HOGWARTS HOUSE: Slytherin.  TV TROPES: Gold Digger.  SONG: idontwannabeyouanymore by Billie Eilish. 

BIOGRAPHY

GROWING UP, SHE WAS BEX. Skinned knees and raggedy clothing, a gap toothed smile as she could shimmy under or in between any gap to open gate latches for friends or steal something from an unsuspecting neighbor’s yard. She could jump off of high points and land gracefully, she could move with the grace of a practiced ballerina ... in beat up converse. You’d be a gymnast if we had the fuckin’ money, her dad would say, tired eyes and tight smile through his second pack of Marlboros. Or you could join the goddamn circus and make us more, on the trapeze, her mother would lament. But then she stopped running around so much, and limbs became more gawky than graceful, and she was more invested in her school-work than anything. Sure, she wasn’t exactly unaccustomed to running wild still, or smoking a joint, or wearing a particularly low cut shirt to smile at the cashier at the seediest corner store and buy a twelve pack for her and her friends ... but she was always smart. Not a genius, mind you, but she turned in all her assignments, did well on all the tests, showed up to class on time.

She did well enough, well enough to go to community college and then transfer to a four year university, where she was BECCA. Short, still, casual — matching her dazzling smile and the fact that she was still quick on her feet in more ways than one, but more formal. Something the engineering students she flirted with could call her through sips of watered down beer, or her roommate could call out to her before asking which top she could borrow. In college, she worked even harder. In the last year of obtaining her pre-med degree, recently accepted into medical school, she met a boy.

And suddenly, she was REBECCA. He was smart, and he was charming, and he was safe. Most importantly: he was kind to her. He didn’t care where she came from. His voice was always soft, hand light as he touched her shoulder. Rebecca, he’d say, in a voice that reminded her of sugar cookies. So that’s who she was then: Rebecca. The name on her birth certificate, certainly, but not one she’d ever been called before. But when whirlwind romance, a new penthouse apartment paid for by his family, honeymoon vacation in a country she’d never even heard of ... nice wasn’t so nice anymore, and sugar cookies spent a little too much time in the oven. They were burnt, and charred and he was controlling. Don’t wear that, Rebecca, I know you didn’t grow up with these kinds of ... sensibilities ... his voice was soft, gentle, but now it felt like he was trying to calm down or comfort something caged. God fucking damnit, Rebecca. You humiliated me at that dinner. It’s like taking a fucking toddler out of the house. He informed her of all sorts of social conventions: how it was embarrassing for him to have her continue medical school, to have it seem like they both needed to work. So she dropped out. Her life is dull now, and the shiny newness of the East side has lost all it’s silvery allure. She’s deeply unhappy, and lonely, and afraid.

[theremharths]

This is just more thoughts on The Left Hand of Darkness, but it’s under a cut bc it’s a huge incomprehensible ramble. Sorry if you’re on mobile

I was worried that Genly finally understanding and accepting that Estraven is just as much a woman as a man, which comes at the moment that he also acknowledges the sexual tension between them, would essentially frame their relationship as “well it’s okay that I’m attracted to this person who is a man, because they are also a woman so I can ignore the man aspect” but it didn’t do that at all--that this scene is the first time where Genly doesn’t switch to she/her pronouns for someone in the “female” kemmer state (like he does with Faxe during the ritual or the orgota in the prison truck with him) seems partially designed to specifically defy that interpretation as much as it’s meant to show how Genly’s developed

The question of Genly’s sexual orientation isn’t really brought up at all, really. I expected a bit of homophobic (internalized or otherwise) waffling on his part (while there are of course plenty of gay men who are misogynists, Genly’s particular brand of casual, unquestioning misogyny tends to go hand in hand w/ a certain similar kind of casual, unquestioning homophobia) along the lines of, say, categorizing any gethenian who he finds attractive as “female” or something similar, but that never occurs. The part where Genly notes that he can’t help but pay attention to Gaum bc of his attractiveness has him describe Gaum as being attractive “as either sex” without placing any more emphasis on femaleness being connected to that attractiveness than maleness

Similarly, his attraction to Estraven, while unrealized or ignored by Genly for most of the book, is fairly plain to the reader as early on as the first chapter. Every other person Genly encounters is described only by their most prominent feature. Even Faxe and Gaum’s attractiveness is largely undescribed--we don’t know what it is about them that makes them beautiful, just that they are

Estraven is described every time Genly looks at him, in great detail, to the point where he’s the only character the reader is really given a full picture of. Even Genly’s appearance is vague; we know that he’s a dark skinned Black man, that he has a wide nose, that he’s probably around six feet tall, that he’s fairly physically strong, and that’s about it. Estraven is a head shorter than Genly, his hair is long and black, his eyes are also black, his skin is dark brown but lighter than Genly’s, he has small hands, he has wide hips, he has single eyelids and heavy eyebrows, he is fairly solidly built and has a “sleek” layer of fat to him, etc etc etc. We always know what he’s wearing, we know how he looks in the light of whatever room he and Genly are in, we know how he looks when he sleeps. All of this makes the revelation of the attraction between them more meaningful to the reader than describing him in the same terms as, say, Faxe was, would have, and almost all of it is from before Genly’s Moment Of Understanding, from when he was still trying to frame Estraven as entirely a man in his mind

While Genly assigns various and frequently contradicting and almost always (to him) negative traits to femaleness--Estraven’s directness is “feminine” but so, according to Genly, is his perceived mysteriousness and manipulative nature--he distinctly never associates sexual attractiveness with women. Even in the scene where he tries (and fails) to explain what a woman is to Estraven and why, to Genly, they are so different from men, he never attempts to use language related to beauty or any sort of physical attractiveness at all

Obviously the main reason why the gethenians are all referred to using he/him pronouns is “it was 1969 and they/them wasn’t widely recognized as a non-plural pronoun and ‘he’ is considered ‘more neutral’ than ‘she’ is” but it also forces the reader to acknowledge that while you can’t describe Genly and Estraven’s relationship as a gay one, you also certainly can’t describe it as a heterosexual one. There is, undeniably, a homoerotic nature to it and to the whole of the novel and to deny that, based on the fact that Estraven isn’t just a man, is to deny that Estraven also isn’t just a woman or just neither one. To use only she/her pronouns for Estraven would be to allow the homophobic reader to do what I was relieved that Genly (and Le Guin) didn’t do--to go “well, sure, it’s telling me that this person is a man and a woman and both and neither, but I don’t want this story to be about a man falling in love with a man-woman-both-neither, so I will pretend this person is solely a woman”

(And, frankly, the need to read between the lines to grasp the attraction between two characters--the subtlety of the whole thing, pre-(and even post-)Moment Of Understanding--is homoerotic in itself. Straightness and cisness don’t generally concern themselves with with subtlety or nuance)

I’m not saying that the choice to use only he/him pronouns for the gethenians was the correct one. I’m following the example set by canon because at the end of the day, using the “wrong” pronouns for even a fictional character makes me uncomfortable--it feels like misgendering, even if it really isn’t, if I use pronouns that the character isn’t shown to use themself. I’m saying that with the options that Le Guin knew of in the 1960s--she/her or he/him--it was probably better to use he/him, at least for specifically Estraven. I genuinely don’t know how one would modernize the way pronouns are used here for a movie or series adaptation. I suppose the best thing I can think of would be to use he/him and she/her and they/them for every gethenian, which is both 1. how plenty of people use pronouns in real life and 2. a lot less confusing/chaotic in a visual medium than it would be in a written one. The issue with switching to solely they/them pronouns in an adaptation is that it could still allow for a separation from that homoeroticism, and, more importantly, that it perpetuates the novel’s fixation on "physical sex” as ruling gender identity, and that being non-binary is something for aliens and not for regular humans. Yes, they/them pronouns would be the neatest option but it wouldn’t work as a solution to the novel’s cissexism

Kosh, the babylon 5 character, is a being without “biological sex”. He is also a male character. To reboot babylon 5 and have all vorlons use they/them pronouns would be to reinforce the notion of gender being decided by sex organs and chromosomes and, in this case, whether or not you’re a sentient ball of light. It would still be adhering to the character’s assigned gender, it’s just that the assigned gender would be “none”. Kosh, as a male character who is not “””biologically male”””, is already trans. If you want to have non-binary characters in babylon 5, you would do better to look at G’Kar or Delenn or literally anyone other than a vorlon

(Of course, satisfyingly and accurately modernizing and adapting The Left Hand of Darkness in other ways would also be difficult. Keeping the themes and messages and plot while removing the implication that there are no trans and/or non-binary and/or intersex people on earth or in the whole of the Ekumen. The simple fact that I just don’t have faith in most prominent producers/directors/casting agents/etc to adhere to the novel’s complete lack of white characters, and especially to actually cast an indigenous actor as Estraven. The other simple fact that Estraven’s death at the end is something I can accept in a book from 1969, but absolutely not in a modern work)

[iamthestrangerinmoscow]

why I think we shouldn’t define transgender identity through dysphoria

by a genderqueer trans man

Let me start by saying that I don’t want discourse on this, as in I don’t wanna get ad hominem attacks or anon hate because of this. Actual arguments and counter-arguments are welcomed though.

Also, since Tumblr is all about identity policing: I do have dysphoria, and at one point in my life, not so long ago, it was so bad that I was suicidal. I am professionally diagnosed with F64.0 under ICD-10 (”transsexualism”), I’m on HRT and I’m planning to get top surgery next year. So don’t come to me telling me I’m a “”special snowflake”” or whatever.

Let me start by stating my personal opinion, which is that the overwhelming majority of transgender people do experience gender dysphoria, whether physical or social, in some form, at some point in their lives. It might vary in intensity, be fluctuating, go away after they medically transition, etc. They might also not be aware of it. I think it’s a pretty universal experience for trans individuals. At the same time, I think the definition of trans should be ‘a person whose gender identity doesn’t match the one they were assigned at birth’. And here’s some reasons why.

 It’s confusing.

If we were to consistently define being trans as ‘someone who experiences gender dysphoria’, it would exclude people who have transitioned medically and/or socially and no longer have it. It would also potentially include cis and intersex people who identify with the gender they were assigned (or coercively assigned) at birth but have traits not traditionally associated with that gender (because, arguably, cis women who have small breasts and want them to be bigger have what essentially is gender dysphoria). And it would require someone to have gender dysphoria that is consistent and present 100% of the time, which is not true for everyone.

It quickly becomes clear, at least to me, that defining trans identity through the presence of gender dysphoria would get really confusing, and would require a lengthy definition and maybe even some sort of diagnostic criteria. 

It defines the trans experience through suffering.

This is an argument that is brought up a lot, but I think it is excellent. Let’s not forget that gender dysphoria is a psychiatric diagnosis. For years we have been fighting to break the association between trans identity and pathology. ‘Trans people are mentally ill!’ is what transphobes like to shout at us when they are out of other arguments. 

Now I’m not saying there’s anything morally wrong about being mentally ill, and I am also aware that a lot of trans people do have mental illnesses, such as depression or anxiety. However, when I talk about trans pride, I don’t want it to be pride based on a debilitating psychiatric condition that almost made me kill myself.

Also while we’re on the topic of psychiatric disorders - if you think dysphoria defines the trans experience, do you also think you need to be professionally diagnosed to be trans? Cause that would complicate things even further, considering how many of us don’t have access to good healthcare professionals, and that ‘gender dysphoria’ as a diagnosis is on its way out of the ICD and, in the future, maybe even DSM.

Do I think some sort of diagnosis should exist? Yes, cause it can help people get insurance coverage and access to medical transition and legal changes. Do I think it should be the defining trans thing? Absolutely not.

Absence of dysphoria doesn’t equal comfort and happiness.

When I was just starting to consider hormone replacement therapy, one of the big things I was afraid of was getting facial hair. I didn’t have dysphoria about not having facial hair, so I assumed getting it would give me dysphoria. But when I actually started T and facial hair began to pop up, I was delighted! In fact, it gave me intense joy. Just because I was okay with a smooth face, doesn’t mean I won’t be more happy with a nice layer of stubble on my cheeks. 

Being unhappy and distressed about a gendered trait you have does not mean you will be happy with the reverse. Sometimes it is hard to tease apart body image issues, body dysmorphic disorder and gender dysphoria. So if you, for example, hate your high-pitched voice, as yourself a question: would I be happy with a low-pitched voice? Would it make me more comfortable? Because the answer isn’t always yes, even if the trait does cause you distress.

The opposite is also true. Being content with some gendered trait you have doesn’t mean you will be distressed if it changes. The change might be bad, but it can also be neutral, or, like with me and facial hair, bring you gender euphoria. Gender euphoria is the opposite of gender dysphoria - it is a feeling of joy caused by your gender being affirmed. And if we absolutely have to define trans identity through an experience, I vote for gender euphoria to be that defining experience. 

It makes people doubt themselves and allows for identity policing.

Many questioning people are afraid of identifying as trans because they feel like they are intruding, faking, appropriating, etc. Others putting pressure on them to be miserable only makes it worse. Often I see people doubt their validity because their experience of dysphoria doesn’t match the classic narrative.

‘I have dysphoria about everything except for my reproductive organs. Am I still trans?’

‘I have dysphoria but it is tolerable, it doesn’t make me depressed. Am I still trans?’

‘I have social dysphoria but not body dysphoria. Am I still trans?’

And so on.

Being trans is about identifying with a gender other than the one you were assigned at birth. That’s it. That’s simple, universally understandable and doesn’t leave room for doubt, policing and exclusion. Is it easy to figure out what your gender identity actually is? Hell no. But it would sure be easier if we didn’t set some arbitrary standards of how much you need to suffer in order to get permission to identify as trans.

In conclusion.

It is my guess that the vast majority of transgender people do experience some dysphoria, in some form, at some point in their lives. I also think that pretty much all trans people experience the opposite - gender euphoria - in some form. And, more importantly, I think that we should just define being transgender as ‘not identifying 100% with the gender you were assigned at birth’. Cause what we surely don’t need is arguing among ourselves and telling people what labels they are or aren’t allowed to use.