#but also snex (snake sex)

[threefeline]

Another snerson

[bowtiepastabitch]

Anon asked this of the-fell-family and they were not feeling the unhinged ask so I'm giving you the unhinged ask.

Since Crowley is technically a snake, what do the husbands do when mating season comes? Does mating happen? If yes does Crowley just stay in snake form? Can an angel even fuck/have sex with a snake? Is that a thing?

[unhinged asks] [it's not my fault, @fellshish started it]

I laughed. So fucking hard when this showed up in my inbox. I did indeed see the original ask, so I'm ecstatic to get to share my thoughts.

Based on my extensive research*, I feel confident in answering that yes, that is A Thing. You can have sex with any consenting party if one makes enough of an effort, so I'd definitely include snake demons in that. I wouldn't think they'd be terribly concerned with mating seasons, loosely tied to biological realities as they are, but rather that Aziraphale would be uncannily into the whole snex thing and request it on occassion. That angel is a hedonist of the highest degree and falls very much on the sensory-seeking end of the autism spectrum, so I imagine he's a bit of a handful (in more ways than one) when you get him in bed and always wants to try out new and different things. Including snake sex.

Now. I'm not sure you'd want to do what one could call "mating" in that context, unless you wanted snabies (snake babies), but I'm sure the snex is fantastic. Personally, I'd guess the naga option is a bigger hit than full bestiality-adjacency, simply because they also like kissing. And kissing is hard when you're a snake. Because snakes don't have lips.

*the extensive research in question:

[fuzzygoblin]

Pocket Pet/Trouser Snake

Pocket Pet/Trouser Snake (1212 words) by FuzzyGoblin Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

Rating: Explicit

TW/CW: Surprise sex, snake!Crowley, Snex (interspecies sex tag), Fluffy Smut, trouser snake jokes

Crowley enjoys being warm in his snake form, whether that be as large as an anaconda or as small as a hognose. And nowhere is as warm as Aziraphale’s pocket. And when the ever curious demon encounters the one-eyed trouser snake… Well, someone is going to have to come out on top.

Excerpt

The benefit of being a demon that can turn into a snake at will is that Crowley can choose whatever size pleases him at any given time. He keeps the large, almost anaconda-esque sized version of his form for lounging in the sun streaming through the large windows of the bookshop. It's also a very satisfying method for scaring prospective customers. If he's feeling particularly chilly, he likes to shrink down to the size of a hognose and curl up under his angel's shirt collar, or in his pocket, to keep warm. The latter is where he found himself one rather chilly January morning, Aziraphale had noticed him shivering, despite having turned up the heating, and had wordlessly encouraged Crowley to shift forms and snuggle ever-so-comfy in his trousers’ pocket. The body heat that radiated from the angel’s thigh was even better than that of a sun-warmed rock. Crowley felt safe and snug–a word he would never use aloud–as he drifted off for a pleasant nap while Aziraphale got on with his day. 

Continue reading on AO3

@goodomensafterdark

[multsicorn]

good omens fic recs, post four

Friday fic recs are back!  On a semi-regular schedule, apparently: first post, second post, third post, tag.

I’ve found all sorts of things to love in Good Omens fic recently: thoughtful worldbulding and kinky sex pollened snex!sex, an enormously fun in-universe fandom POV fic in which A & C have a podcast with a fandom, an Adam/Warlock college AU that plays nicely with their contrasting origins.  And, of course, there’s emotional get-togethers, and the yearning of not-quite-yet, and hot exploratory sex, once they are together, in a variety of forms.  Twelve fics below the cut.

*uck by misbegotten (<1k, g). In which Crowley and Aziraphale snog on a bench in St. James’ Park, while Crowley has mostly, but not quite completely, frozen time. Short and simple, but perfectly adorable.

care and loyalty by Elsajeni (<1k, g). In which Aziraphale watches Crowley’s hands, and Crowley touches his. (Set in Paris, 1793, as if that matters). I love how much yearning, and how much restraint, is evoked in these very few words.

Choose Your Faces Wisely by Poetry (5k, g). In which Crowley and Aziraphale have daemons. I love how thoughtful it is, how it explores what having another living creature who's somehow your soul, but also its own being, might mean for Aziraphale and Crowley. When they're not supposed to have daemons, but they do - is it just another way of being 'people'? Or is it, in a way, not just another.

it's a new craze by attheborder (6k, t). In which Crowley and Aziraphale, after the apocalypse-that-wasn’t, host an advice column podcast. I love the way that their true history leaks into the dialogue of the podcast as a background fictional conceit, I love the immersive feel of the script snippets and the in-universe fandom guessing game around them... and I just love both of their (hilarious) approaches, here, to advice. 10/10 would try to listen if this podcast could somehow be real.

Any Other Name by ignaz (10k, t). In which Crowley calls Aziraphale by any number of endearments, and denies that any of them mean anything. I love the flesh that this story puts on the idea of Crowley and Aziraphale (separately) knowing people here and there as people, and the huge emotional spectrum of spot-on banter that it encompasses, ranging all the way from aimles drunken rambling to actualfax argument.

Find Me Somebody by raiining (11k, t). In which Adam and Warlock have a nice little college romance. I love how Warlock is shaped by his upbringing, both his mostly-absent father and his Nanny’s advice, and how Adam, years after the apocalypse-that-wasn’t, continues to deal with the more mundane problems of his continuing powers. And how Warlock and Adam, here, make a surprisingly good fit.

If We Wake To Discover by edenbound (2k, e). In which Crowley adopts a number of children, throughout the millennia. I love the way that Crowley’s varying relationships with them echo and reflect on not only Crowley’s questionably demonic character, but also on the question of humans with free will as opposed to a creator or parent with only hopes or a plan and love.

Feast of Plenty by Capzi (3k, e). In which Aziraphale eats Crowley's cunt, that's it, that's the fic.  I love how both the loving physical detail and the give-and-take between them make it one of the hottest such fics I've read, and I love, maybe especially in the way it's backgrounded to the porn, the picture of Crowley's relationship with his physical body, too, with the ways it both is and isn't under his control.

Smoke Gets In by songlin (5k, e). In which Crowley and Aziraphale get high together, and then have sex.  I love how their pining turns so simply, so sweetly, into doing and saying, I love the super hot description of sex for beings at least one of whom isn’t quite used to having it - but loves to try new things, new pleasures - and I love all the banter between Aziraphale and Crowley, how well they know each other, how easily they get right back on track again every time they wander off.

The Serpent You Know by Franzeska (7k, e). In which Crowley is sex-pollened, more or less, and Aziraphale - who is also not unaffected - has no idea what’s up, but he’s up for all of it. I love the roughness of the snake-form sex, the detail of barbed organs and fangs, and, most of all, I love how very much Aziraphale enjoys all of Crowley, this ~dark side,~ too.  (The angel is a monsterfucker, pass it on!)

Born Of Frustration by juliet (8k, e). In which Crowley has just about had it with Aziraphale’s stop-and-go approach to romance. I love how the frustration and even anger here balance out the sappiness of the love that exists at all times between Aziraphale and Crowley, and I love how this story takes seriously the difficulty of their getting together. If the struggle is real, the victory is, too. Also: there's super hot fighting sex.

A Spoonful of Sugar Helps the Medicine Go Down by for_autumn_i_am (12k, e). In which Aziraphale (not as Brother Francis) has to masquerade as Nanny Ashtoreth’s husband, for a getaway to the South Downs with Warlock and Harriet Dowling.  I love Crowley’s particular tenderness towards these humans in her life, over a spine that’s hard as rock, and Aziraphale’s love for Crowley, aching with restraint, yearning to show her and give her everything.