#but another part of it is that i hated my initial draft for this so much that i just shut the document and haven't opened it since

[suddencolds]

Fool Me Twice [4/?]

After more than a month, I'm back with this update which is... not extremely long, but I figured I would post it before I lose confidence :')

Part 4 ft. (the aftermaths of) fake dating, a cold, and an office conversation

You can read part 1 [here]! (No additional context is needed aside from the previous 3 parts.)

—

Work resumes on the 3rd. Yves thinks of all the ways he might thank Vincent for all the trouble—a late New Year’s gift? (But he doesn’t know what Vincent would like, except presumably useful things, but if they’re useful, shouldn’t Vincent have them already?) An invitation to dinner at some nice restaurant? (But what if Vincent sees it as another inconvenient proposition—as more time outside of work which he’ll be obligated to spend with someone he doesn’t even know that well?) A gift card to a nice restaurant? (But would that not come across wrong—presumptuous at best, condescending at worst?)

Normally, Yves would ask Margot—ever the voice of reason—for advice, but it occurs to him, now, that he won’t be able to consult any of his college friends about this if he intends to keep up the lie.

And there’s that, too. If he intends on going to any future events that Margot—or any of his other college friends, at that—will host, he’ll have to tell them that he and Vincent have broken up since (which will only serve to prove Erika’s point that Yves isn’t everything he’s made himself out to be—at least, when it comes to relationships), or think of some sort of way to excuse Vincent’s continued absences.

If one thing’s for sure, it’s that asking any more of Vincent than he’s already asked is entirely out of the question.

Yves drives himself to work on Tuesday morning, gets to his office earlier than most, says hi to Cara and Laurent, and gets to work. It’s easy enough to settle into work again, to a 10am meeting with the team and another couple calls with clients, to all the paperwork and data analysis he’d for himself before the winter holidays.

Vincent usually gets to work early—he’s always there when Yves gets to the office—and stays late. He’s usually at the break room at 10:15, unless he has a meeting of some sort, for his usual morning coffee. He works on the same floor, but his cubicle is far enough away that Yves can’t see him from where he sits. 

Yves doesn’t look for him. Better to catch him in the morning in the break room or at lunch in the company cafeteria, Yves thinks, as to not risk interrupting him in the middle of something important.

But Vincent—despite showing up to a morning conference with the team—is surprisingly absent from the break room at 10:15. And then Yves ends up working with Cara on an upcoming presentation until 1, and when he gets to the cafeteria, Vincent isn’t there, either.

It’s unfortunate timing, or perhaps Vincent is just unusually busy. Yves knows he does a lot of work behind the scenes, from the few times he’s asked him what he was working on and gotten an intimidating list of projects in response. When he passes Vincent’s desk in the early afternoon—more precisely, when he decides to take the long way to the break room—he finds Vincent speaking with Angelie, one of the new hires, their heads ducked together over the harsh glow of Angelie’s laptop screen. He watches as Vincent gestures to something on the screen and says something too quiet to make out from this distance, and Angelie nods, jotting something down onto a notepad she’s holding.

How formal, Yves thinks. It isn’t long ago that he was in her shoes, new and intimidated by the formality of the workplace, asking Vincent for help and tabling everything he thought might be of note.

He doesn’t think much of it—only that of course Vincent is busy; Angelie is right to think that Vincent has the kind of expertise that will really be useful to her, and the patience to walk her through it with a level of thoroughness Yves is frequently impressed by, or else she’s just gotten very lucky.

The afternoon passes quickly enough. All of a sudden, it’s 5, which is around the time when Yves usually leaves, and he still hasn’t spoken a word to Vincent all day.

Against better judgment, he takes his briefcase with him, heads toward the sector of the building that Vincent works in. Tells himself it’s just on the way to the back door exit. Tells himself a short exchange wouldn’t hurt—would it really be so wrong to invite Vincent out to dinner, or at the very least, to offer him the thank you he so unquestionably deserves?

He half expects Vincent to be gone already, considering that he’s probably been here since 7:30. But when he gets there, Vincent is at his desk, as usual, cross-checking several documents he’s printed out.

“Hard at work, as always,” Yves says, stopping just short of his cubicle.

“Yves,” Vincent says, though he doesn’t offer any further note of acknowledgment. He looks tired, Yves realizes, from the slight tension to his posture, the way he blinks hard behind his glasses, his eyebrows furrowing slightly. But of course he’s tired—he’s been here for almost ten hours already.

Yves waits for him to finish what he’s doing—to look away from the monitor screen, even just for a moment—but he doesn’t.

“Are you planning to stay much later?” Yves asks, at last, though he gets the feeling that he should leave.

“Most likely,” Vincent says. “Is there something you need me to look over?”

“No,” Yves says. “But I was wondering—”

“I’m very busy today,” Vincent cuts him off, paging through one of the documents that’s laid out over his desk. “So if it’s not work related, now’s not a good time.”

It’s then that Yves realizes—Vincent must think he’s about to drag him into another one of his fake-relationship arrangements. 

“I don’t need anything from you,” Yves says, faltering. “I’m just—it’s getting late, and you’ve been here all day.”

“Yes,” Vincent says. “Like I said, I’m very busy.” He pauses to highlight a line of numbers, scribble something into the margins. How he can concentrate on his work and the conversation simultaneously, Yves doesn’t know. “If you have work for me, feel free to leave it on my desk, I’ll get to it tonight. Otherwise, I’d appreciate it if we had this conversation later.”

“Noted,” Yves says. He tables the dinner conversation for later, sets his briefcase down on the floor so that it leans up against the wall. “Let me help.”

Vincent frowns, his eyebrows furrowing. “It would take longer for me to explain this to you.”

“You don’t need to explain anything,” Yves says. “I can look over the documents myself.” He takes a step closer, peers down at the papers strewn across Vincent’s desk—earnings reports and expense reports, mostly, and a couple marketing proposals.

Vincent reaches up to pinch the bridge of his nose. “That would require you to know the context.”

“I’ve dealt with a hundred of these in my life. I promise you I know what I’m doing.”

“Then you’ll have to spend more time telling me your findings,” Vincent says. “Better to not split up the work at all.”

“It would still be faster than going through them yourself.” 

“Hardly.”

Perhaps Vincent doesn’t trust Yves to get things done to the standard that he expects, then. Yves thinks he’s worked here long enough to consider himself decently qualified, but they haven’t worked together closely on anything since Yves’s first couple months at Evertech, and so he doesn’t fault Vincent for being wary.

Still, Yves thinks he can be useful here. And maybe there is something selfish to it, too—to wanting to be as useful to Vincent as Vincent had been to him, to wanting to prove that he is capable of helping in the first place, of offering something of value—but even aside from that, he’s worried that if he doesn’t step in, Vincent might be here all night. It doesn’t seem like much of an impossibility, considering who he’s talking to.

“You’ve been here for hours,” Yves tries. “It’s only our first day back.” He looks around—perhaps there’s someone else here that could help, someone who’s worked here longer than Yves, who Vincent trusts. “You don’t have to let me help. But at least hand some of it off to someone you actually trust, or tell Charlene that she’s given you too much work this week, or both.”

“It’s no more work than usual,” Vincent says, with a sigh.

“And yet, you’re planning on staying late.”

Vincent looks up at him, at last, his expression unreadable. “I’m capable of doing my own job, Yves.” His voice is curt, almost snappish. “I really don’t have time to argue with you right now.”

Yves wants to say, of course I know that. Vincent is nothing if not qualified—Yves has never doubted that for a moment. He wants to say, I want to help you regardless.

But that would only be presumptuous. He doesn’t know Vincent that well. Besides, it’s really none of his business—they’re coworkers, not friends. Vincent knows what’s best for himself. The best thing Yves can do right now is to stay out of his way.

“Okay,” Yves says, a little defeated. “Good luck on your work. Make sure you get some sleep.”

There’s no response to that—no acknowledgement that Vincent has heard him at all, even though it’s quiet enough in the room that he must have. Yves turns to get his briefcase. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Vincent jerk forward suddenly, his shoulders tensing with a near-silent—

“HhH’Gkt-!”

Yves bites back a reflexive bless you. It’s just one sneeze. It doesn’t have to mean anything. But Vincent sniffles, pressing his knuckles up to the underside of his nose, to stifle another—

“HhH’NgkT-!”His breath hitches again, his eyebrows drawing together as he jerks forward again, with a quiet but painfully forceful, “Hh… hEH’NGXt!”, crushed into his fist.

He sniffles again, reaching across the desk to snag a tissue from the tissue box that, Yves realizes with a jolt, is usually not present on his desk. He sighs quietly—the sort of tired, drawn out exhale that leaves no question about how tired he is—and reaches up with a hand to gingerly massage his temples. The slight grimace that follows is almost certainly indicative of a headache. 

Yves considers asking Vincent how he’s feeling for all of two seconds before he remembers the almost-hostility with which he was just faced. Perhaps it would be better if he pretends to not have heard. Briefcase in hand, he quickens his pace, ducks out of the exit, and heads down the stairs. 

Vincent spent his New Year’s Eve with him, at a party surrounded by strangers—even though Vincent dislikes parties and probably dislikes strangers—he’d put up an immaculate act, played along even through Yves’s slight intoxication, and driven him home—and in turn, Yves has repaid him by... 

God. Yves shouldn’t have asked to kiss him. The guilt settles heavy in his stomach.

Yves really, really owes him.

He heads down several flights of stairs and ducks outside to the parking garage. It’s even colder today than it had been on New Year’s—perhaps indicative of a colder winter to come—and though the parking garage is sealed off, when he’d looked out from the office windows upstairs, it had been starting to snow.

The cafeteria at their workplace is closed for dinner, and it’s a half hour drive home from here through rush hour traffic—maybe a little longer in the snow, and longer still if he stops to get something to eat.

He’s in the process of unlocking the car, setting his briefcase at his feet, and inserting the keys into the ignition when the idea occurs to him.

It’s an irrational idea, probably.

[Part 5]

[the-s1lly-corner]

HI there, hate to bother you but i was wondering if you could do the amazing digital circus head canons for a gn! reader who acts a lot like ena

if you have never heard of it you can check on the ena wiki but i would really love if you did something like this so thanks

TADC x ENA type!GN!reader

typically i would do all the characters in one post, but its starting to get late and tumblr wont let me save half answered asks in my drafts for some reason TToTT so im gonna split the cast in half, if you want the rest of the characters you can send in a second ask so i can remember to do everyone else :0! also my apolocheese for any personality mistakes, i think i watched ena a long time ago but was confused/didnt watch the whole thing so uh uh!! relying on a character wiki for this (on that focuses on season 1 so uh uh, idk if that will impact anything) little bonus bonus incorporating enas color thing into this cuz uh we can say its digital world stuff ooo that gives me an oc idea; oc whos like the mayor from nightmare before christmas who has a spinny head/face thing that relates to their emotions

CAINE:

caines is going to be shorter because hes just your number one fan regardless of your personality, in fact he probably has a silly shirt with your face on it somewhere

will do everything in his power to make sure youre happy and content, and will do everything to cheer you up when you switch over to your sad side

takes you to wherever it is that he 'sleeps' when you get overwhelmed by stuff and keeps you there until both of you are sure that youll be okay and your blues are long gone

you and him easily match energies, sometimes he will even try to one up you with using fancy intricate words

POMNI:

writing pomnis part first but oh funny is it that pomni and ena have the same VA

anyways

absolutely loves you, but she is so so worried about stressing you out and switching to your 'sad form', tries to (often times unsuccessfully) cheer you up

honestly you both need a break, things in the circus are hectic and insane, and considering pomni just got here she is going to need your help to get used to things

not much to be said since i think pomni is another character i struggle to write

JAX:

initially teases you for how fast you switch up, its almost like gangle being more upbeat with her comedy mask and more sad when its broken

tones it down a little when you explain you cant really control it whereas gangles case is just her being more confident with the comedy mask (at least thats my hc)

sometimes give you weird looks when you use an unnecessarily long set of fancy words to describe something mundane

bro is fighting the urge to mimic it

surprisingly does the kind thing, he takes you off to the side when something stresses you out so you can have a minute to compose yourself

RAGATHA:

optimistic sweetheart meets ray of sunshine, you two are an unstoppable force of good and kind of rub off on some of the others

similar to jax when you get stressed out or upset about something, usually when its an in house adventure, she sweeps you to the side and helps calm you down. she probably knows some breathing techniques, i think

ignoring the fact they probably dont need to breathe but thats asides the poin

[dragon-teaparty]

“ I Love You Too ” - Leon Kennedy x Reader

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

ok so first off, i'm so fucking MAD bc tumblr didn't save my draft when it suddenly closed the app to update so i have to rewrite this ENTIRE THING

i'm actually so mad about it, i swear i was about to just not write this. i'm gonna rip my hair out i swear

anyway, i'm back with another story :3 this time it's more wholesome and fluffy

-------------------------------

summary: you and leon become even closer than before (gn reader btw)

It was nearly sunset. You and Leon were in his backyard, just enjoying the weather. You had begun to play fight, something that was common amongst you both.

Usually, it would be typical banter but you'd always say something that would set Leon off, and now was one of those moments.

You said something about his driving and teased him about every time he crashed a vehicle. Of course you had to make some snarky comment about his license.

Before you could bolt off, Leon grabbed you by the waist, causing you to yelp and giggle.

He swept you off your feet and held you in his arms bridal style. You instinctively wrapped your arms around his neck.

"Hey, c'mon!" You laughed, wiggling in his grasp. "You're like 80 tons of muscle, it's no fair!"

Leon chuckled. "Can't take what you dish out, huh?"

You and Leon were very close. Your connection was obvious to those who even glanced at you. You weren't dating, no, but a lot of people sure thought you were.

It was clear how much Leon genuinely cared for you. You had been his light in the darkness of the horrors he's seen in Raccoon City and the mission to Spain to save the president's daughter. It was difficult for him to let people in and the trauma only made it worse.

Of course, Ada had to do something with this as well. Her betrayal all those years ago still weighed heavy on Leon's heart. He was still confused, hurt, and angry all the same. Although he was glad to see Ada alive, he couldn't help but have a taste of bitterness for her. A bitterness that just wouldn't wash off of his tongue no matter how much the mercenary tried to make things better.

You were different. So much different than any other person he'd ever known.

Everything about you was perfect in Leon's eyes. Your laugh, your smile, your sense of humor, the way you'd look away and squeal when you were excited about something. It made him smile.

You had successfully torn down the walls Leon had built and he was more than happy about that. Of course, the initial part of getting to know you was rather irritating for him, he didn't want to talk about his feelings or let anyone see this side of him. You had been a ray of sunshine on his cold heart.

"Put me down!" You squeaked, squirming around.

Leon let out an exasperated huff. "Okay, okay!" He chuckled and then gently placed you back down on your feet. He immediately pulled you into a hug to which you happily accepted.

Your love for Leon was just as strong as his love was for you. You always had more romantic feelings for him but you never admitted it in fear of ruining the special bond you two had.

"I missed you while I was away," Leon spoke up, still holding you against his chest.

You smiled at this. "i missed you too." You said, your voice becoming quiet. "I always miss you."

Leon felt a pang in his heart when you said that. His job was dangerous and there was always the risk of losing his life. He knew how much you worried and he hated it.

He never really thought much about how dangerous being an agent is since he was so used to it at this point. Seeing you worry made him feel guilty.

"I know," he replied softly. "But you know I'll always come back to you, right?"

You nodded, burying your face into his chest.

As much as Leon reassured you that he'd always come home safe, you couldn't help but have the thought in the back of your mind.

When he was away, your nights were often sleepless and you found it difficult to get things done from how worried you got sometimes.

The thought of losing Leon was crushing and you couldn't stand it.

"Hey," Leon spoke, pulling away a little to look at you. "I promise." His expression was soft and his tone sweet and reassuring.

You couldn't hold it back. As you looked up at him and heard his words, tears swelled in your eyes and they began spilling. Leon pulled you back into his arms and you hugged him back once more. He shushed you quietly, running his fingers through your hair and murmuring soft reassurances.

The two of you had stood there in each other's arms for quite a while. By the time you two parted, the sun had finally dipped below the horizon. The moonlight shines through the branches and leaves of the tree you were under, illuminating you both.

Leon couldn't help but admire you. You looked so beautiful underneath the soft glow of the night sky. Your eyes always appeared to sparkle in the light but they looked especially like stars here. He found himself not being able to tear his eyes away from you.

You looked back up at him and into his pretty blue eyes.

He reached over and gently cupped your cheek with one hand. "I'm never leaving you, y'know." He whispered, once again reassuring you with a genuine smile spreading across his face. "You can't get rid of me that easy."

You smiled back, your heart fluttering as you leaned into his touch, placing your hand on his own.

"Oh, I know," you said, your tone turning more playful. "You really don't know when to quit, Kennedy."

Leon laughed, a genuine laugh that you and you alone had ever heard. He looked back at you, a comfortable silence suddenly falling upon you both.

You felt yourself get lost in Leon's eyes. The baby blue was so mesmerizing to you.

The way you looked at him didn't help either, it made his heart jump out of his chest.

The way you looked at one another was undeniable. The fondness and love in your eyes, like you were a golden treasure in the middle of the rubble in both of your minds.

As Leon looked at you, he had an overwhelming urge to just admit his feelings. He loved you so much and he wanted to shout it out loud, pour out his heart to you.

Instead, he simply leaned in, his lips softly pressing against your own.

Your eyes widened, not expecting the sudden gesture at all but you melted into the kiss, your eyes closing shut.

It felt like fireworks had gone off in your brain, butterflies swarmed your tummy, tickling your insides. You almost couldn't believe this was happening.

Leon held the kiss for a little while longer before he pulled away, looking into your eyes. His expression was so soft and loving.

"I love you," you finally spoke, blurting out the words as you were unable to hold them back anymore. You surprised yourself, a blush quickly creeping across your cheeks.

Leon smiled. For the first time in years, he actually felt complete, he felt so loved and safe. This feeling was almost enough to drive him to tears. Never in his life had he ever felt this way about another person before.

He pulled you close again and planted another kiss on your lips before he pulled away again, looking down at you with a grin that he just couldn't get rid of.

"I love you too."

-------------------------

phew! this one is definitely not as good as the one i originally had and that upsets me a lot :'c

i hope you all liked it anyways! love u guys <3

[markrosewater]

I seem to always find lots and lots of discourse about block sets. Two sides of the same argument every time.

Side 1 says something like:"I hate all these random sets, I miss block sets."

To which, Side 2 says; "Well block sets never sold as well at the end, players attention span's are better suited for one and done blocks."

My problem with this response is that it essentially ignores the initial statement. Rather than clarifying what they mean, they assume and answer.

Personally, I miss block sets, but ONLY from a story perspective.

Basically, do sets exactly the same as you're doing now. Draft is better now than blocks were, standard with Foundations sounds fantastic. The only thing I'd like to see is a set of setup, and a set of payoff.

MKM was a set based on a murder mystery with the big twist ending basically included in the release, as an example. It could've benefitted from a real, but delayed, payoff. Set up the consequences for each suspect, then reveal and give different consequences that were hinted at in other ways. Bam. Improved.

The last time we visited New Phyrexia, it was a block, I remember ubiquitous speculation over how the story would wrap up. There were factions events at local game stores, branded posters and packs for the factions at play, etc. I had a friend get the New Phyrexian emblem tattooed on themselves. The story felt *Important* and so much less divorced from magic than it does today.

Usually, in my experience, when someone asks for blocks, they're asking for the story to matter. There are lots of mechanically interesting card games out there, and mechanics are only part of what makes magic, magic!

All I would ask is that writers get the opportunity to do setups and payoffs with magic's evolving story with multiple sers, and that story related sets have *some* play synergies. They don't need to share mechanical themes just to share story themes, but it would be a nice little florish if they had mechanical synchronisets,

Hell, a REALLY good idea (in my opinion) would be to do these sets in a different order than the old method. Modern fantasy novels swap POV characters and follow different stories. Why not set up multiple stories in a row, then start to alternate resolving an older, established plot line, and then starting a new one or swapping to another established one. This really gives players time to get interested and speculate (and making the story FEEL present will likely also boost novels and comics numbers, etc., if you need a monetary reasoning.)

What do you think Mark?

We already do a lot of what you’re asking. Each Magic “year” does have a larger connected story, often with different POV characters.

[aghostnamedcalamity]

Hi Calamity! Got a few questions that pertain to your awesome fanfic. Firstly, how exactly did Joey end up working with Mordecai in the first place. Secondly, how do you think Nicodeme and Serafine would react if they found out that Mordecai has a son. Thirdly, do you think you'll write anymore fanfics with Mordecai and Benjamin.

Helloo! I’m glad to hear you’ve enjoyed the fic! I do hate that it doesn’t have more of the headcanon lore explained in it, at the time it was just a fun little thing I made thinking it wouldn’t garner much attention. But to answer your questions:

1. Joey met him again while working some shifts at Marigold and sort of forced his way into an “friendship”, if you can call it that. After a raid shook him up real good, he left bartending behind but needed money and kept nagging Mordecai to let him borrow some cash. Being in debt to Mordecai, Mordecai forced him to watch Benjamin when the whole mess initially unraveled as repayment. What was supposed to be a temporary arrangement turned into a prolonged one after Mordecai got a bit attached.

2. Ooof how do I think the Savoys will react? I think there is always an air of opportunism within the business they all work in. Knowing that sensitive of information about Mordecai is certainly giving them the upper hand…but I also think they are able to draw the line at an innocent child. Perhaps pester Mordecai about this new information to get him to comply but they would never actually do anything because it’s a bebé c:

3. I have a couple of drafts I wrote last year around the same time as the posted fanfic, but I never got around the posting them. Mostly because I realize now that in my attempt to keep Mordecai in-character, I think I might have made him come off as mean and uncaring to Benjamin and that was not my intention. So while I know what my intention was, I think the audience might not interpret that so I’d love to go through it and rewrite it with my “Mordecai cares despite his sociopathy” more clear. I added a little snippet of one under the cut for you, though! Hopefully you enjoy! It’s a bit of a silly slice of life one set before the main fic when Benjamin is much younger. Sorry for any mistakes!

“Fine, Benjamin,” he said as he lifted the pillow off his face. “You can sleep here tonight. And only tonight.”

“I can sleep here?!” Ben said happily as he scrambled onto his feet. “I can stay with you?!”

“Yes,” Mordecai sighed as he slapped the side of the bed closest to Benjamin. “But you have to stay on that side of the bed.”

The child inhaled in excitement as he began to try and pull himself onto the bed. He was relatively small, even for his age, so he struggled to push himself off the floor. It didn’t help that Mordecai had a particularly tall mattress, something he’d chosen purely for comfort reasons, but made it difficult for the child to climb in by himself. For a moment, Ben hung from wads of the fitted sheet he had grasped in his paws, using his feet to try and push his upper body over the top.

Mordecai’s eyes widened when he suddenly lost sight of the child and he heard a loud thud as something hit the floor. He leaned to look over the edge of the bed and at the boy sitting on the floor again.

Ben dusted his paws together as he whispered a small ouch to himself. He looked up at Mordecai and showed him the palms of his hurt paws.

“I fell down,” he said matter-of-factly.

“Yes, I’ve discerned that much,” Mordecai replied. With a tired sigh he reached down and pulled the boy up with him, sitting him on the bed.

Another clap of thunder shook the wall behind them, accompanied by a bright flash of light that illuminated part of the room. Benjamin looked at Mordecai in horror and quickly covered his ears.

“I don’t like that!” he said with concern.

“You’re fine,” Mordecai exasperated. He pointed to the center of the design on the headboard with one of his claws. “Do you see this point here? This is the center of the bed. You need to stay on that side of it, alright? I don’t want you squirming your way onto my side. Understand?”

Benjamin nodded eagerly and patted the bed sheets beside him. “Don’t touch my side, dad!”

Mordecai frowned at the boy.

“Just lay down and go to sleep, will you?”

“But I don’t have a pillow!”

Mordecai sighed and rubbed his eyes with the palm of his paws. He used to have two pillows. But he only used one when he slept and so at some point he’d decided that keeping a single pillow in the middle of the bed felt much more beneficial to the spacial harmony of the area than two did.

“Here,” he said as he pushed his pillow to the child. He then turned onto his left side, facing away from Ben with his arms folded across himself.

“Thank you,” Benjamin told him, taking the pillow and making himself comfortable. He looked at the older feline expectantly. “Daddy, I said thank you!”

“You’re welcome.”

The boy rolled around for a couple of seconds before settling in on his back, holding his hands together on his chest. After a brief pause of silence, the young boy turned to look at Mordecai’s back.

“Dad?”

Mordecai was staring straight ahead of himself; dead, emotionless eyes looking at nothing in particular and yet somehow appearing tired and drained.

“Why must you call me that?” Mordecai asked the darkness between them. “I’ve asked you so many times not to. My name is Mordecai.”

Benjamin thought about it for a second before shaking his head. “Your name is Mord.”

“No…it’s not,” Mordecai sighed. “That’s just what Joseph calls me, for whatever reason. He can’t even be bothered to struggle through anything more than one syllable. It’s no wonder his life sporadically just falls into shambles.”

“Joey calls me Benny Boy.”

“And I don’t like that, either,” Mordecai said bitterly. “What are you, some mascot for a laundry detergent?! I detest nicknames. They’re nothing more than a reflection of laziness and lack of discipline.”

Benjamin laughed. “My name is Benjamin Heller!”

“Yes...I suppose it is.”

The rain continued to knock against the window, creating a constant, soothing rhythm in the room. Ben yawned and rubbed his eyes with small fists before once again turning to look at the older cat.

“Dad, I have to go to the bathroom.”

Mordecai rolled back over to stare at the boy with a frown.

“Then go. What are you telling me for? I don’t need to know everything that goes on in your body.”

Ben had sat up and was watching the older feline while he picked at his claws nervously.

“I’m scared…”

“I’ve already told you, you will be fine! I’m confident you can handle this.”

“I don’t want to go alone.”

“You are being immeasurably annoying right now, Benjamin,” Mordecai said, seething at the child. “You are the youngest and somehow the most domineering person in my life. Why do we always have to do what you want?!”

“You can come with me really fast!” Benjamin continued as he motioned with his hand. “It’s really fast, daddy!”

“I did not spend all that time teaching you to go to the bathroom for you to do this to me.”

“You can hold my hand and I won’t be scared, I promise.”

“Does it ever occur to you that maybe I don’t want to hold your hand? Go to the bathroom!”

The young kitten shriveled into himself, squeezing his legs together and holding his paws between them, grimacing as he tried to hold it in. He bounced a little on his knees and looked at Mordecai anxiously.

Mordecai very roughly slapped his paw over his own face before aggressively kicking his feet around to throw off the blanket, getting up with an angry snarl.

“Come on,” he said forcefully as he yanked the boy off the bed and unceremoniously carried him under one arm, grabbing his glasses on the way out.

He made his way down the hall and to the doorway of the bathroom, clicking the light on to illuminate the facility. Then, he plopped the boy down at the entrance and pointed sternly into the room with one paw.

“Go.”

Benjamin danced foot to foot as he hesitated to go in. He turned and grabbed Mordecai’s other paw to try and pull him into the room with him, trying to gain himself the extra security.

Mordecai shook his head furiously and yanked his hand back.

“I am not going in there with you. The absolute best I can offer you at this moment is for me to stand outside this door until you’re done and that is it. So go!”

The older cat used his paws to push the child from behind and forced him into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. He sighed and leaned his back against the wall, doing as he promised and waiting until the boy was finished. Finally, the sound of the toilet flushing and running water could be heard over the patter of the rain overhead.

“I’m done!” Benjamin exclaimed as he made his way out of the room, drying his small paws against his nightshirt.

“Did you wash up exactly the way I showed you?”

The small child nodded eagerly and held his paws up for Mordecai to see.

“I washed with soap! You can smell if you want, it’s like a flower.”

“I would not like to do that, thank you,” Mordecai replied flatly as he watched the boy smell his own paws with a grimace. “Stop doing that. Now come on, I’d like to get to sleep at some point today.”

The older feline then clicked off the bathroom light and turned to start making his way back to his room. Benjamin scuttled after him, looking around himself to ensure nothing scary was following them. He held onto the fabric of Mordecai’s sleeping pants tightly, unintentionally pulling them as he struggled to keep his strides even with Mordecai’s longer legs.

The black cat noted this with displeasure, thinking perhaps the child would tear the silk of his nightwear with his claws. He was young and still not fully conscious of them it seemed, occasionally snagging soft fabrics he fiddled with. The last thing this night needed was one of his favorite pajama pants getting a rip through them.

He let out an exhausted sigh before reaching down and grabbing the arm that was clinging to him as close to the shoulder as he could, pulling him high to catch him in his other arm. Sometimes, things were not worth the confrontation. Especially when he yearned for sleep more than he desired to correct behavior in that moment.

Benjamin reveled in this decisions that seemed mostly in his favor, grinning happily at Mordecai now that he was at his same eye level.

“What’s that?” he asked Mordecai, pointing very closely at the glasses sitting on Mordecai’s nose.

Mordecai pulled his face away from the finger. “Don’t do that.”

“Okay…what is it?”

“They’re my glasses,” Mordecai said in mild annoyance. “You’ve seen them before.”

Benjamin continued to stare at them intently. “But why do you put them on your face every time?”

“Because I need them to see,” Mordecai sighed, finally arriving at the room. He let the child slide out of his arms and onto his designated side of the bed, dusting the sleeve of his nightshirt after. “I’ve had a condition called myopia since I was young. It makes it difficult for me to see certain things so I need to wear them most of the time.”

“I like them!” Benjamin said as he watched Mordecai place them on his bedside table in awe. “I wish I had one of those.”

“Well, I suppose that’s good. You’ll likely need them in a couple of years,” Mordecai said as he got into his bed, letting his entire body relax as he enveloped himself in the comfort of his linens. “Unless your eyesight takes after that woman. But it has been a fairly dominant gene in the family so far. At the very least, it’ll be interesting to see if you manage to evade what no other Heller has.”

“You’re a Heller feller!”

Mordecai looked at the boy in visible confusion, who smiled back at him as he, too, let himself fall onto his back.

“Joey said that,” the boy explained.

“Of course he did,” Mordecai said as he shook his head in disapproval. “Can you please go to sleep now? I’m tired of talking to you.”

“Okay, I will,” Benjamin responded as he burrowed himself deeper into the covers, eyes squeezing shut as he let go of a large yawn. “Goodnight…”

[kudouusagi]

Would you say that Bucchigiri is Utsumi's sophomore slump (coming off of SK8)? I was hoping for so much from this one, and yet it seemed like she and Taku Kishimoto were making so many wrong decisions here during its production. MAPPA's influence probably didn't help matters either.

Well, according to Utsumi from the Spoon 2.di article I read, she didn't really know what to make with this one so it was kind of a group project. She really wanted to make SK8 and she asked for pretty much all the staff that worked with her on it personally. It was very much a passion project for her.

For this one this one she said she was already making SK8 and didn't know what to make when they asked her to make another original series, so she discussed it with the producers at MAPPA and they all agreed on a yanki show, and then it took them a long time to decide on the Arabian Nights theme after that. She suggested a few different ideas and the other producers decided they liked the Arabian Nights theme best. She was assigned Kishimoto to be the writer, but she hadn't met him before. Things like that.

Here's something from the interview with Kishimoto in Spoon 2.di 107

Q: Kishimoto-san, it seems that you initially proposed a bit cooler story but Utsumi-san asked you to add some comedy to it. How did you feel when you heard that request? A: If I had to say, I've had a lot more work reorganizing and rearranging the structure of manga to adapt it into an anime. I'm not the type of person who naturally has a lot of stories and characters bubbling out of me, so when I make things I unconsciously drift toward making formulaic stories of cool heroes who always win. When I do that though, the characters I make are very stereotypical, and so when I submitted the first draft to director Utsumi and MAPPA's Otsuka-san, they said "The flow of the story is good, but the characters feel really stereotypical." It was then I was asked, "What were you like when you were Arajin's age?" I wasn't good-looking, so I figured if I just directly confessed to a girl I liked I'd be rejected, and so I thought I had to try even harder than other people. I'd give girls poems, and if that didn't work I'd carve the girl's name into a stone and give it to them, and I made it my goal in life to make that girl love me. So I told them I really couldn't be used as a reference for anything. But when I said that, they said "That's so interesting!" I felt like someone like that could never be a main character, or rather, I had ruled it out because I felt like it would be crazy to have a main character who acted like that! Since I was rejected for being so creepy in real life, after all (lol). But the two of them said it was interesting, so Arajin's weird parts became my weird parts and by adding my weird parts into him, it naturally became a comedy. So, rather than trying to write a comedy or making it become a comedy, I just added my own silly parts in order to give the character a personality, and it ended up developing into that because of the character's personality.

So the whole reason Arajin is who he is (someone everyone hates lol....) is because he's based off Kishimoto himself. I don't know what the story was like before but I really can't agree the flow of the story is good now... but yeah.... that's how we ended up here.

[joequiinn]

The Dos and Dont’s of Fake Dating - inspo guide!

When I'm working on a story, I draw on all kinds of media as inspiration. I make lists of characters' fav movies or playlists that remind me of them, etc.

These are just some things I took inspo from/relate to Dos and Don'ts! I'm taking a brief pause in writing, so hopefully these will hold us over!

@sheneedsrocknroll92 and @steeldaisies because yall showed some interest!!

Playlist

I have a lil playlist full of songs that fit this fic's vibes in some way or another. There are various genres and tones and themes, so if you aren't afraid of bouncing around between types of music, this may be a fun way to vibe with the fic!

Music

Mystery by Dio - this is 100% THEIR song, I've associated this with Eddie and ice princess since day one; it will also make an appearance in an upcoming chapter~

Just Tonight by the Pretty Reckless - this song is one I associate with a particular chapter that is drafted but not out yet, and the vibes in general really mesh with some of the themes of this fic.

Ghost, HIM/Ville Valo, & Twilight Creeps - I just listen to these artists a lot while brainstorming and writing this fic; some particular songs are on the playlist mentioned above!

David Bowie & Fleetwood Mac - sooo ice princess isn't really a music person, because I think it's a funny contrast to Eddie; however, I do think she has a few Bowie and Fleetwood vinyls/cassettes lying around that belonged to her mom, so that's the extent of her music knowledge lol

Movies

Can't Buy Me Love - originally, I wanted to write a story inspired by this movie; the setup is ridiculous and I love every minute of it, so if you want to see an early prototype Eddie x ice princess, I suggest watching this one!

10 Things I Hate About You - this was also a movie that I considered using as plot inspo; although they're not the same, I do think similarities can be found in the characters to some extent, especially Patrick = Eddie.

Heathers - the vibes and fashion speak to be, and in another world maybe Eddie and ice princess would serve up some JD and Veronica vibes~

Halloween - it hasn't come up yet in the fic, but ice princess is a closet horror movie fan whose favorite is Halloween (no it's not her fav bc it's my fav what do you mean).

Bride of Chucky - Chucky and Tiffany speak to me on a spiritual level, and I feel like Eddie x ice princess give some of these vibes??? Also RIP Eddie Munson, you would've LOVED Child's Play.

Labyrinth - I picture ice princess having a lot of similarities with Sarah, which I didn't initially notice when I was first writing. There have been many lines I've written that I can SO clearly hear in Jennifer Connelly's voice, so she's a big inspo for this fic. Also, I love Bowie

TV

That 70s Show - putting aside all the real-world controversies, I was obsessed with Jackie & Hyde when I was a kid, and I think you can clearly see a similar character dynamic with Eddie and ice princess.

Married... With Children - have yall SEEN Kelly Bundy??? enough said.

Other

Evil Ernie - maybe you've seen my other Eddie posts, but I've mentioned before that the vibes of this comic series and it's titular character remind me of Eddie, so that's all.

Flight of Icarus - yes, yes, I know that this is literally a book about Eddie, but I still think it's worth noting that I've used the book as some reference, but for the most part I haven't included it too much (I also haven't read it sorry not sorry)

[leliosinking]

Hot take I guess but the fandom was way too hard on this book (and still is tbh) and for what? Because it isn’t interested in fan service? If anything Anne’s writing was at its best when she ignored what fans wanted, and I think it’s time for a reevaluation of my boy Vittorio the Vampire.

I just think this was such a promising start to New Tales (more than Pandora, even) and I sort of hate all of you for boycotting it or telling new readers to skip it. (as far as i’m concerned TVA, Merrick, B&G, BF and BC are all unofficially New Tales anyway.. TVL-MtD are the only proper vampire chronicles, everything else falls into different categories, but I digress).

With regard to Vittorio, however, we were given a true blue Ricean vampire hunter novel (the only one mind you) with an actual, functioning plot and some of the best action she’s written since TVL… and you all shunned it. And I get it, we don’t read these books for conventional, commercial plot contrivances, but for the florid language and richly crafted characters; but this is the rare Anne Rice novel that’s just.. fun for the sake of fun?

And no, I’m not blind to its problems. It absolutely needed another draft or two (as do a lot of the later VC entires) and no, Vittorio is not her strongest protagonist by leagues. But what we got was still filled to the brim with good ideas?

The Court of the Ruby Grail cult, especially, is one my favorite of Anne’s inventions. Like their dynamic with the local human villages feeding them their castoffs was legitimately disturbing and IMO better executed than most of the times she retreaded the Children of Darkness post-TVL.

And while Vittorio the character might be kind of boring, Florian and Ursula carry this novel and deserved to enter the larger narrative tapestry on their strengths alone but “waaah Lestat and co. aren’t here” so “it’s bad” or whatever.. I really can’t stand some of y’all.

Anyway, this is long enough and I really didn’t set out to write an essay in defense of what is ultimately a mid-tier entry into this series. But. I still feel that much in the way that MtD and Blackwood Farm have been recently reassessed as good novels that happen to be bad VC entires I think it’s time for some of you to similarly reevaluate Vittorio the Vampire, because this is a good vampire novel, it just isn’t a good vampire chronicle (well I think it is and yet and yet and yet). But it’s still part of the series and it does fit into the larger picture despite what some will have you believe.

If this is your first time, I personally like to read VTV between Body Thief and Memnoch. I think it is better thematically situated there than between TVA and Merrick as initially published. The archangels that enter later in the story build nicely upon David’s vision of God and Satan in TTOTBT and make for a strong intermission full of angels and demons that assist in setting up the Dantean finale of MtD. (I have more suggested reading orders btw, some other time perhaps).

I dunno.. if you like this book please let me know lol like I could use the solidarity because I feel like I’m the only one (I have it ranked #6 out of 15). But yeah, I think Vittorio is probably the most underrated and most unfairly slandered entry in Anne’s entire catalogue if I’m being completely honest.

[luvmmarner]

ANDREI SVECHNIKOV - HATE HATE HATE

Written for @comphy-and-cozy sorry if it was a bitt late. My editing for chapters take awhile, especially if working on other stuff. I decided to cut this up, as it didn't make sense to put another scene I've written with this one. Thank you @jackhghes for helping me to semi edit this. I'm horrible at editing and it probably would take me a whole month to edit this. Also, very sorry about the delay. My ADHD just distracts me all the time, but when's not a good time to release this then now! Also for the part about reader not thinking much into it or acting on it. It's because I kinda wanted this to be a semi-slow burn, where reader is oblivious.

TW: the reader gets drugged (nobody knows, so we just say we drank a lot), drinking, reader is very depressed but is fine later on, sexual tension (briefly). Words marked with this font mean it's a flashback. People included in flashbacks will be a key part in later chapters :) Word Count: 4k? 3k? Idk.

CHAPTER 1 - Hatred

Hatred…

That’s one word you thought you would never use. Except, of course, for the times when you were younger when you would say it to your siblings when they were being annoying or making you angry, but you never meant it.

You didn’t know you were capable of hating someone so much until you met Andrei Svechnikov. 

As soon as you met the Russian, you were already certain that the two of you would have little chance of getting along. You hated his arrogant behaviour and his ‘I don't care’ attitude. You usually didn’t mind when people were arrogant and had big egos; growing up, you had to encounter that a lot between your siblings. You didn’t remember much growing up, only that you were raised in Finland before you decided to move. Although it's difficult for you to recall specific memories from your time in Finland, they frequently come back to you when your siblings bring them up. Your favourite memory that constantly comes back to you is when you and your brother both learned how to skate at the same time. You both instantly got the hang of it. You had always wished that your parents could have afforded hockey lessons for both of you, but unfortunately, they could only afford to pay for one of you at a time. You decided to let your brother play hockey and wait until they could afford the lessons for you. However, by the time they were able to pay for you, you had already lost interest in playing hockey. Your love for skating and hockey did not go away, but you figured that because it had been so long since you last played, you weren't very good at it anymore. As a result, you decided to stop playing and concentrate on your studies instead. When you reached maturity, you found that you enjoyed skating more than you had in your younger years, and as a result, you chose to enroll in figure skating classes. You didn't have to necessarily turn professional; even if you weren't the best, you could still find fulfillment in what you were doing.

The day your brother got drafted into the NHL was probably the best day of your guys life. You were very proud of your brother, but also upset that he would be leaving and you wouldn’t be able to hang out with him as much anymore. The day you got a green card and were finally permitted to live in the United States forever was the most exciting day of your life. Your brother made a quick offer to live with him, and you agreed instantly. You didn’t want to agree initially and said you’d find somewhere, but you made the decision a few days later to live with your brother after you couldn’t find a place. You moved in with him shortly after you got to the United States and got settled into your new home.

You were very glad that you were able to live with your brother. It wasn’t like you could live without your brother’s help, but both of you guys were so used to spending time together and being together that it only made sense that you guys would live together growing up. 

You didn’t mind living with your brother at the start, but when it turned into months, it was more annoying than ever. You didn’t think it was your brother that was specifically annoying; it was the friends he brought over. He always had you introduce yourself to his friends; you didn’t mind some of his friends, especially the ones that weren’t his teammates. It was his teammates that you were most annoyed about. You didn’t want to introduce yourself to them since you could never see yourself being friends with any of them.

There’s always multiple parts that come with missing someone. One being is waiting, and the other is loneliness and quietness. You never expected you’d be waiting for your brother to return home from his trip with his friends in Sweden. You never expected the loneliness and quietness that came with him being gone. You were definitely used to it when he was on road-trips with his team, but he would always come home eventually. The days you wait eventually turn into a few months. You didn’t even know it was July until you got a text from your brother saying, “Happy 4th of July.” It wasn’t like you were just sitting at home all day; you did go outside from time to time, but you had no motivation to do anything else beyond that. 

You have never experienced this before. You knew it was bad for your general health and body, but you were just tired and exhausted all the time. It wasn’t like you were eating unhealthy as well. You just didn’t go outside much and slept for most of the day. It ended up with you getting fired because of it, but you didn’t care. You disliked your job anyway, and you knew it was only a matter of time before you got the call that you were fired and when you got it. You weren’t surprised at all, only replying with an ‘Okay’ before hanging up.

Today was no different from any other day. You decided to watch Netflix and just chill in bed all day. You were probably just going to order a pizza or something since you haven’t had it for awhile and you weren’t in the mood to really cook today. You were so wrapped up in your TV show that you didn’t pay any attention to the commotion downstairs. Even if you did pay attention to it, you were way to tired to go downstairs anyways. It was most likely your friends coming over to check up on you.

“Yeah, you could just put it in my room for the time being.” The voice echoed through the hallways. You heard the voices travel to the living room before dying out. You didn't find it particularly interesting to pay attention to it, so you chose to bring your focus back to the show. After hearing your brother's room open, you finally made up your mind to pay attention to the ruckus that was going on. You waited for a bit, just listening. It wasn’t until you heard footsteps coming from his room that you stood up straight away, and nothing else was going through your head except irritation. You made it very clear to your friends that they were not to enter your brother's room. You didn’t even go in there. It was His room, Nobody else’s. You were just about to go into his room, but a voice made you stop in your tracks. It sounded oddly familiar… too familiar. You heard that voice growing up. You muttered an inaudible ‘no way’ under your breath. There’s ‘no way’ you constantly repeat those words over and over. He wasn’t supposed to be back until August. It's all just in your head, right?

It was then that the door to your brother's room opened. It wasn’t your brother, though. It was the Russian you only met briefly; your brother called him Andrei; you never talked with him before; you only introduced yourself to each other before engaging in conversations with others. 

“Like something you see, milyy?” There was no mistaking the inquisitiveness behind that smirk of his as he spoke.

You never heard the word ‘milyy’ and even if you didn’t know the meaning. You decided then and there that you hated the word, regardless of the meaning it holds. “Don’t call me that, and thanks, but no, I don’t. I’ve seen better.” You smiled as you watched the smirk slowly disappear. "Sure, milyy whatever you say.” His voice was rolling to a whisper as he approached you, inches away from your face. “You definitely wouldn’t be saying that soon.” His smirk reappeared as he stepped away, watching you. You couldn’t help the redness on your face after he said that. Your throat going dry immediately. “I would rather die than ever date you.” You bit back the irritation in your voice, trying to be respectful and not let it show that the comment effected you like it did.

“Keep saying that. We both know it’s not true.” He said, walking away, before adding, “Your brother is looking for you.” 

If you weren’t shocked before, you’re definitely shocked now. When you first saw Andrei, a part of you kind of suspected that your brother was already at home, but the realization didn't fully hit you until now. You pay little attention to the previous sentences and are just focusing on the fact that your brother is at home. You nervously head downstairs, multiple voices seemingly bouncing off the walls until it just goes quiet. Your mind going blank, shutting out all the other voices. The only one you cared about hearing was your brother’s. “Hey sis.” Sebastian said, already pulling you into a hug. The warmth of the hug made you feel safe and happy. A feeling you haven’t felt since he’s been gone.

“I missed you, Seb.” You mumbled low enough that only he could hear. You didn’t need any of his teammates laughing, especially Andrei.

It seems like eternity, but when you both pull away, you’re smiling something that you’ve refused to do for awhile. 

“I missed you too, sis. Sorry for being gone for a while.” Seb says this before pulling away.  Andrei cuts in. “Sorry for ruining this reunion, but we really should be getting going. The boys wouldn’t be happy to wait any longer.”

“Wait what.” You ask, confusion hitting you. “Where are you going? You can’t just leave; you-” 

It was like your brother could instantly sense the sadness in your tone. Because he was quick to reassure you. “We are just going to the club. You are welcome to come with us if you'd like.” 

You give a nod. “Okay, I’ll come, I guess.”

“We ain’t going to babysit you all night. If you want to go home, we ain’t leaving to drive you.” Andrei said abruptly he didn’t even wait for a response before he left, probably to start up the car.

You decided at this very moment..

You hated Andrei Svechnikov. You usually don’t go out clubbing; the last time you did, it was with one of your friends. It was an experience that you never wanted to experience again. It wasn’t bad in any way, but it was the fact that your friends all left with somebody, and you were left all by yourself.

“Come onnnn!” Kimberly said. She’s been trying to convince you for hours now to come with her and Lena to the club. “I don’t know.. I don’t have anything to wear.” 

Kimberly opened your closet like she already knew the answer. She sorted through your clothes before deciding on a few she liked. "Here, look! Here's some that’ll look good on you.” You glance at the clothes before turning away with disgust. “I’d rather stick to jeans or something.” Kimberly's smile turned into a frown. “Alright, then how about this?" She showed you a few more options before you decided on an outfit.

You made the decision to dress down for the occasion by donning some jeans and a tank top. You chose to wear something that would be comfy, even if it is not what the majority of people would wear out, because you weren't really in the mood to go to begin with. You weren't typically choosy about the clothes you wore, but there are certain items that you either don't want to wear in public or you just aren't really feeling in the mood to wear at the moment. - - -

You were unable to recall much of what happened after that. All you can think of is how badly you wanted to leave...

Escape…

“Leave her alone.” A voice spoke from behind you as the laughter of the guys around you died down. You didn’t bother looking at who said that. You just got up, pushing through the crowded room, trying to look around for your friends, but to your luck,  they were nowhere in sight.

You felt your chest tighten, and it was harder to breathe by the minute. Your whole body felt dizzy. 

You didn’t remember anything after that, but somehow you made it back home safe.

There wasn’t much conversation during the car ride. You just mainly focused on your phone, unless you asked if they could skip songs you didn’t like. Thankfully, they didn’t complain; you really didn’t want to argue with Andrei about something as dumb as music.

Once you made it inside, you quickly made an introduction to a few of your brother’s friends, who all rode in different cars together. You knew a few, but it wasn’t any of the friends you usually had conversations with and enjoyed talking to. You made your way to the bar, telling the bartender what you’d like to get - on the rare occasion when you do decide to leave the house.

You made the hasty decision to go to the bathroom, hoping that your drink would be ready by the time you arrived back. You thought that if the bartender saw you leaving, that he would hopefully put your drink to the side or at least look after it. If you weren’t back in time.

It was once again the worst decision you could’ve ever made.

When you immediately returned to your spot, you found your drink already there. You weren’t too long in the bathroom, so you just made a guess that it was just made. You took a few sips. 

“Is that what you usually order?” A random guy who happened to be in front of you asked. 

“Yeah. I don’t drink that much, so this is the only thing I’ve tried.” I laughed slightly.

He gave a chuckle back. “I’m the same. I only like a few drinks, most of which my friends actually offered me to try. I’m way picky with my choice of drinks, so I only stick with a few I like.” 

You nodded, smiling slightly. It was good to finally have a normal conversation with someone, and this guy seemed nice. You gave a quick look around. Your brother was nowhere to be found, but you did spot Andrei. He was already staring right at you, and he seemed pissed about something. You rolled your eyes. He’s always got to be mad about something; he can never be happy.

You moved your attention back to the guy in front of you. “What’s your name?” 

“Tyler.”

You extended your hand to shake it as you said your name as well. Out of nowhere, you felt your head start to pound. “It’s loud in here, ain’t it?” You say, once again chuckling. You brushed it off, stating it was merely because there was loud music playing. 

“Are you feeling okay?” Tyler asked, his fingers going out to softly touch your back. 

It was somewhat relaxing; you couldn’t lie. You would never allow any stranger to touch you at all, yet the kindness and the gentle touches made you feel somewhat better, and you liked it. “Uh yeah. Wanna go dance?” 

He had no chance to speak as you took his arm, lightly tugging on it as you led the way. 

After that, everything started to happen all at once. There was no apparent cause for the sudden sensation of lightheadedness and dizziness that came on suddenly. To prevent yourself from falling down, you had to maintain a firm hold on Tyler. When he inquired, "Are you okay?" you opened your mouth to respond, but no words materialized in your mind. 

The last thing you heard was Andrei’s voice.

Then it went black.

You let out a low grunt. It felt as though a thousand bricks were being thrown at your back. You muttered to yourself that this would be the last time you ever drank. You opened your eyes, and although it took a moment for your vision to clear, you immediately realized that you were home, safe, and in bed. 

The headache that you had been experiencing prior to this was, of course, was still present. You were in a terrible mood. You had no idea how you got home. You didn’t feel like getting up at all… You just wanted to sleep, and hopefully the next time you wake up, it wouldn’t feel like this. 

The next time you woke up, you were in bed. You checked the time on your phone. The brightness of it makes your eyes fully open. It was 9:27am. You groaned. It was too early, and you didn’t feel like getting out of bed. You took a few minutes to try to fall back asleep, but all the attempts were unsuccessful, so you eventually decided to give up and get up. 

The headache that you previously had seemed to pass over during your sleep. Thank gosh. You really didn’t want to have to experience that throughout the day. You quickly shower and get changed into fresh clothes. You didn’t remember much about last night, only that you met this guy and that your brother disappeared for most of the night. You were definitely going to bother him about that later on. 

Right, now you were starving. You head towards the kitchen, quickly grabbing an apple before making your way towards the living room. You planned for this day to just be a relaxing day. However, as soon as you glared at the couch, you rolled your eyes.

Andrei was already awake; he was on his phone, listening to something on his headphones. As soon as he saw you, though, he took them off. "Are you okay, milyy?” He asked, sounding worried but not making any moves to get up.

You rolled your eyes. Why does everyone ask that? Of course you were okay. You would certainly know if you weren’t. You walked over silently, asking if you could sit here. He seemingly got the message and gave a nod of approval. “Uh. What happened to my brother? The last time I saw him, he was having drinks, and the next he was nowhere to be seen.” “Tony took him to his place. He had too much to drink. He said they were planning on hanging out later today, so he thought it would be easier to take him to his place.”

You couldn't help but laugh; that was so typical of your brother. It is impossible for him to control his drinking; after only a few sips, he becomes extremely inebriated. "Oh, well, that's not good at all. I should have known from the beginning that he was not a good drinker. 

Andrei grinned again. You already knew what this meant. He was probably going to say something stupid to embarrass you. “Last night, it looked like you didn’t handle it well either. Compared to him, you were actually much worse.”

What do you mean by that? " I only had one drink.” You were more confused than ever. There’s no way. You've had numerous drinks before, and it’s never been so bad that you couldn’t recall how you got home. You just assumed that you ordered yourself an Uber and went home, or that your brother drove you. 

“Milyy… I drove you home. Do you remember?” Andrei questioned. You shook your head in disbelief. “No? I just thought my brother drove me home or that I ordered an Uber.” 

Andrei started to explain what happened, as you did your best to tell him what you already remembered so he could explain what transpired there. You were never this embarrassed until this moment. As he explained, you began to remember most of what happened. 

“I got you, milyy.” Andrei said his arms were wrapped around you to hold you steady so you didn’t fall. “It’s okay, baby. Let’s get you outside, okay?” You nodded; you felt sick, and the heaviness in your head wasn’t stopping.

“Can you take me to your place?” “No, milyy. I’m taking you home.” The strictness in his tone had you squirming.

You pouted; this was so unfair. You didn’t want to go home. You wanted him to take you to his place. “Ok, but I want you to take me to your home. I want to be in your bed.”

Andrei ignored your comment as he led you outside in the cold air; it felt amazing against the hotness of your skin. You loved it. You closed your eyes. This was so relaxing. 

The next thing you remembered was being in Andrei’s car; he was quick to turn on the A/C due to your request. You mumbled thanks before staring out the window.

“Why don’t you like me?” 

The question that came from you was so out of nowhere. You knew it, but you didn’t care. 

“I do, milyy.” Andrei reassured you, his hand just slightly brushing against yours. “Then why wouldn’t you want to fuck me?” You already felt tears coming down. Were you not good enough for him? Did he not like you? You didn’t understand. The question made him immediately silent. He didn’t even give you an answer right away.  After a brief time of being silent, he replied “I’m not interested.”

That’s at least what he told you. You shouldn’t care, really. It wasn’t like you guys were ever going to be a thing. You hated him, and he hated you. It was obvious, even if he said he didn’t.

“I’m sorry that I said that, but yeah. I’m not interested either. It was just the alcohol talking, not me.” You laugh, attempting to release the mood. 

It’s seemingly worked because Andrei laughed with you.

“Alright, well, I’m just going to head out. Seb asked me to see if you were alright in the morning.” Andrei said, not allowing you to respond before he was already gone.

You were left feeling confused. He lied. You knew exactly what he said. It was constantly repeating in your head. “You hate me, milyy. As much as I do. Trust me, if you weren’t out of it right now. I’d give you everything you want.”

You brushed it off, assuming he may have just had a few too many drinks as well.

Right?

—

You didn’t see Andrei for a month after that. You were very grateful, and you seemed to forget all about that night. You wish it could’ve stayed like this. You knew it wouldn’t last long until your brother was once again bringing his teammates over. You didn’t mind, and you even joined them when they started to play a few games.

You decided to drink once again, but only because you knew your brother wouldn’t leave again. Plus, it was in your own home. If you didn’t feel good, you could easily just go lay down. The night had been going well until Andrei had to ruin it.

“I’d be careful if I were you. You wouldn’t want to drink too much like last time, right, little one?” 

“Why? Don’t you want to hear me ask you to fuck me? Oh right, I forgot we both aren’t interested, so I know that wouldn’t happen.” You smiled; you weren’t drinking a lot this time only having small sips, so you knew exactly what you said. It was only to piss him off, and it worked perfectly. Because he shut right up after that.

You hummed in amusement before you made your way to where your brother was, joining him in whatever game they were playing. You felt Andrei's eyes staring at you every now and then, and you couldn’t help but smile every time you looked at him. He deserved it.

If Andrei expected you to just listen to whatever he had to say without saying anything back, he was very wrong. You hated him, and you were going to make that very clear.

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

For your Q&A Tag, I'd love some Jedi Moon rambles :D

Heya! (From TSP's Q&A tag game)

I'll gladly oblige.

Jedi technically originates from the primary villain of early TSP drafts. In Drafts 1-3 he was an evil sorcerer, though his name changed each time: Warlock LV [the 55th], Quincy Warlock, and Quincey Moon respectively. In each of those, he had a slim motivation to just...I dunno, stop the kids from getting back to the portal by stealing their metal detector?

Anyways, when starting Draft Four, I thought Quincey was a bad name for him so I chose the name Jedi. I'd made a list of names to use and when I found Jedi on a baby name website I thought it'd be fun to name him that. I kept the surname Moon because I thought it sounded cool. I created Carmen alongside him because I thought having a partner in this would be fun.

However, in crafting their motivation, I realized they didn't work as villains anymore. Morally gray scientists, though? That worked. Them not having powers came from the sorcerers in previous drafts not having powers of their own and having to learn magic through other means, though that's obviously changed.

I also thought it was super unfair that villains didn't have powers. Like, what the hell are those undertones?? So I thought making them "good guys" was the best course of action.

Carmen's backstory wasn't actually that detailed at the time, but Jedi's WAS. I crafted out his entire life story basically, and soon thought making him have his own chapters to explain his actions would be helpful. I gave him a lot more attention than Carmen at the time.

Originally, I didn't have his mother kill his father, they just escaped one night. I also, for some reason, had this take place two years later, when his sister was also discovered to be Inutilia, but I decided to make it more immediate in Draft Five.

Speaking of his sister, Ms. Moon the teacher was originally Mrs. Moon, his wife, as she was in Draft Three. It didn't fit so I made her his sister instead.

At some point, I considered making Jedi/Carmen a thing but after thinking about it I decided no absolutely not I don't like that. Now neither of their sexualities align with that, thank God.

Pinning down Jedi's motivation was always super hard. It made more sense when I got his backstory together, but that's a lot of spoilers. Basically, he's just trying to make a difference, make the world a better place. His dad also used to have superstrength, but I found it cliche and changed it to something more powerful.

I always have fun writing Jedi. He keeps to himself and he's always super vague and confusing. He has a distinct voice and is awkward about everything. Full of regret but does nothing to fix things. He's only here because of how much he cares. Though I make fun of him a lot for being a pushover, I do find him super interesting.

Planning out his chapters is so hard, though, especially in Part Two. There's so much traveling and I have to make each entry interesting plus do some world building, which I find difficult. But once I plan out his chapters, I'm always proud of the result. It's so fun and thrilling to write from his perspective. The challenging bit is making him clearly Jedi but also ten years old.

Jedi, as a character, got mixed reception. My sister loves him because he's soft-spoken, my friend @cadotoast (hi) had a thing for him (sorry), and another friend hated this man's guts. It was quite funny, actually. That third friend softened to him, but it was still funny.

I didn't decide to make his full name Jedidiah until Draft Five and had Moon be his mother's maiden name. It was the opposite before, but I thought switching it was more interesting.

Making him a pseudo father figure to Noelle was decided while initially drafting Part Two, but in Draft Five I added it in Part One so it didn't come out of nowhere. I thought it'd be interesting due to her daddy issues that I unpacked more in Part Two. Moving it back made it stronger, in my opinion.

Jedi often plays punching bag. Making his life miserable and shitty is part of the fun of his character, especially since only part of it is his fault and most of it is not. A lot of my notes for him are to give him more issues, the poor man.

In Draft Five, I made sure to emphasize his love for science, especially the powers. He's super intelligent but most importantly he's passionate, and despite being depressed and unfulfilled, I love those moments where he lights up because he's made a fun discovery or he has to think a little bit. Or when he just wants to hang out with Carmen.

And man, I love him and Carmen as a duo. Solidifying them as best friends, and marking the young ages they were when they met, is just glorious. I've written early drafts of that meeting, and I like seeing it blossom into a friendship. I can't wait to get back to it because of how much they mean to each other. And their completely different demeanors is always so fun to write. Sure, they're doing unethical stuff, but that doesn't mean they're not fun and interesting to play around with. My notes on these two and their stories are so rambly and detailed because dammit I can't stop thinking about these two.

I hope this was a fun enough ramble and that it answered any lingering questions lol

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites

@nebula--nix @literarynecromancy @honeybewrites @the-golden-comet

[supremechancellorrex]

Now, I gotta say, I find it interesting how there are some people that target you for stating your opinion on fiction. I've had this same Jedi-stan user sending me tens and tens of comments which are based on denial and opinion rather than any logical argument. Now, they're telling others not to read my arguments because... what, it's too scary? They literally reblog my post with a quite insulting argument and then quickly block me because they don't want me to respond.

Well, too bad.

This isn't even an argument based on logic. You just stated your opinion and acted like it was a fact, anyone else who believes differently is doing so "foolishly", more "foolishly" than a child apparently. Because despite much evidence to the contrary in children's media, apparently 'villains' never have any depth or say the truth ever, according to you.

Slick: "Yes, she offered me money. But she offered me something more important, something you wouldn't understand: freedom!"

You know the one thing Slick doesn't actually have? It's freedom. Because, he is a slave, that is a fact. Let's go through the fact that slave isn't a title you award but a state of existence and being, a slave by definition is: "a person who is forced to work for and obey another and is considered to be their property; an enslaved person." That is the clones to a T. Just because Slick was selfish doesn't just invalidate he described a situation which still has not been refuted and instead has been only proven over and over again.

Now, you say "the clones are property of the Republic", and they are under the command... of the Jedi, who are generals and part of the Republic command structure. Legally, the Jedi may not have a say in the fate of the clone troopers other than being in charge of their daily actions and organisation for years, but illegally? Are you claiming that the Jedi could not even think to organise a mass desertion? When the law is unjust, you challenge it, you break it. Now, you try to absolve them here by saying that they had no choice because the Separatists were a threat to the Republic, an institution that supports slavery for its own ends. You may hate it but "Cool motive, still slavery" still applies here. Any institution that supports having an enslaved army does not deserve to exist, and that includes the Jedi Order's support of the Republic.

As for your non-sequitur on the placement of the episode, this is just pointless. There is no basis to discount an episode just because it wasn't in Season 4. This adds nothing to your argument and is just a complete fallacy.

You can't really make this argument on a number of basises. One, the writing intentions have clearly changed since that initial George Lucas' quote decades ago. Not only this, but George Lucas doesn't even own Star Wars anymore and Disney are now in charge, with Dave Filoni and a number of other writers making significant contributions.

Dave Filoni: "So I think that trying to draw these paths of the Jedi and the choices they make and how they wind up good or bad … Yoda isn’t afraid in the prequels to say the Jedi are flawed and that they’ve become greedy and self-interested and arrogant. That helps you understand why they’re going to lose the Clone War and why they’re so ripe for the picking."

I think this quote speaks for itself. Also, I think it was very clear that George Lucas, a man well-known for changing his mind and who was still the executive producer, was on Ahsoka's side in the Wrong Jedi Arc. Otherwise at some point the narrative would have refuted her assertions on the Jedi Order, that's just basic storytelling.

Now, onto the clones. You essentially admit that the draft is essentially slavery in the clones' case. The clones are property and are referred to as such, they can't leave, they can't vote, they have no rights and this has been the case since they were fetuses in tubes. Let's look at Umbara again.

Fives: "We did it. We took Umbara."

Captain Rex: "What’s the point of all this? I mean, why?"

Fives: "I don’t know, sir. I don’t think anybody knows. But I do know that someday this war is gonna end."

Captain Rex: "Then what? We’re soldiers. What happens to us then?"

Considering the fact that the Senate are voting on whether to "decommission" the clones like a product in the Bad Batch, I think it's safe to say that Captain Rex's fears were confirmed. Senator Riyo Chuchi, an actual good person in a bad system, is literally fighting to give the clones any rights at all in the Bad Batch, and she is a lonely voice.

Riyo Chuchi: "[The Clones] are not droids to simply be shut down. These are soldiers who defended us, defended our worlds"

Meanwhile, when the Jedi wax on about the end of the War, they just assume they'll be fulfilling the same duties they did before the war. This is because the Jedi are privileged and are treated as citizens during the War, able to walk around completely uncumbered and engage on a conversational level with the elite. They can also leave the Order, especially if they break the code, which is not something allowed for the clones. They may be servants, but they aren't property, and they have more tools to push back and fight the Senate, which they can walk around freely in a venerated position. You practically say this throughout your argument. Over all, the Jedi are drafted, the clones are slaves. There is a difference in the power dynamic.

The Clone Wars waived the right to be dismissed solely as "It's just a superificial kids show, don't criticise" when it decided to deal with dark, serious topics, including the Republic's growing authoritarianism, political maneuvering, slaughter and murder. All those cases of the Jedi challenging their leaders simply make it more egregious that the Jedi never advocated for the clones to the same level. The fact Mace Windu is willing to fight tooth and nail for the Zillo Beast, however demonstrates no passion to fight for the clone rights, who are slaves soldiers under his command, is actually a pretty bad look. There are also clones that died around the same time as Even Piell, yet they get no rites either.

It's funny you mention Qui Gon Jinn because his opposition to the Jedi Council has been noted previously and it is a critique of the Jedi Order.

Dave Filoni: "I think Qui-Gon in a lot of ways represents the kind of path the Jedi are supposed to be on. He’s the one that’s the most compassionate. But he has no ambition to be part of the council. He feels he can’t do what he needs to do if he’s a part of that. That thinking and that philosophy is from what Dooku taught him. Dooku was a free-thinker and was looking out for people."

Oh, you know Dooku too? The guy who said "The Jedi blindly serve a corrupt Senate that fails the Republic it represents." Looks like he imparted some spirit to his Padawan. Ultimately, this actually supports my arguments that the Jedi Order have lost their way as an institution. Now, earlier you say it "sucks" the Jedi can't allegedly speak out because of the draft, at the same time you... have Jedi speaking out on every topic that isn't clones. Hmm.

Well, mademoiselle-cookie, you have crossed into antisemitic territory here and it's shockingly disgusting of you. The Jedi should not be considered an expy of Jewish people, because that would be really racist of the writers and very misrepresentative. Jewish people are not a fictional order of magic monks that wave lightsabers around, fighting wars with state-owned clone slaves, believe it or not. Going through your argument until now has been bearable, but this really takes the cake. I've warned people to stop using real-life minority groups as meat-shields for their fictional favs, however it seems that privileged people will often use minority groups instinctively for their benefit. The fact you accuse me, a mixed race gay man, as being the type to fall for Nazi lies because I critique the Jedi Order is just the icing on the cake.

Also, you argue "it's a kid's show" and then it's a direct allegory for the Holocaust, one of the darkest periods in human history, at the same time, huh? If this were the case, it would mean it's portrayal is even more important to critique without exception.

But, moving on from your just completely inappropriate allegory. So, the Jedi have a "choice" as you just state. That's much more the clones ever had and that is a privilege. You're essentially arguing for the Jedi to stand back and do nothing by choice while earlier you also argued that the Jedi had to do something in regards to the War as it was the moral choice but also that they 'don't' have a choice. Meanwhile, the Jedi were shown to be willing to overthrow Palpatine given the 'proper motivation', but due to their lack of compassion I guess the enslavement of millions of men such as the clones just wasn't important enough. Your argument falls apart because the Jedi did try to overthrew Palpatine in the end, just not for the slaves.

Using the "Bad guys lie" trope in an absolute capacity is also not an argument. You're just stating your opinion as a fact again and it's very 'convenient' your metric. I could reply "Good guys can be wrong and don't always tell the truth" and we'd, like your point, get nowhere.

Finally, an interesting point. There's no denying that Ahsoka did not make the situation as squeaky clean in her desperation, however ultimately my point still stands that Mace Windu, and I quoted him, said "I understand your sentiment, Obi-Wan. But, if the council does as you suggest. It could be seen as an act of opposition to the Senate. I'm afraid we have little choice."

At the end of the day, the Jedi do have a choice despite what Windu says. The choice was political. The ruling isn't unanimous, because doubts are expressed, but as Mace Windu says what they view as important in response to Obi-Wan saying things don't add up regarding Ahsoka is to focus how it looks to the Senate, a Senate that supports authoritarianism, corruption and slavery. The Jedi arguably lie to themselves and say they support justice, but they don't ultimately. As Jedi Master Dooku, the described "free-thinker", says: "The Jedi blindly serve a corrupt Senate that fails the Republic it represents."

Hmm, you don't seem to understand what an "unreliable narrator" actually is. With your use especially, every single character ever could be described as an unreliable narrator, I can describe Mace Windu as an unreliable narrator or Obi-Wan. I could literally flip your argument and claim the Jedi are unreliable narrators who only think they're doing good because they were raised in an environment which told them this from a young age and ultimately they were propping up a failing, authoritarian, corrupt 'Republic'.

I don't think you realise that Ahsoka's story would not have been presented the way it was in Season 7 if the narrative was not on her side. There were key cues in its structure and quotations that were critical of the Jedi Order, who were mostly in opposition to Ahsoka narratively.

Ahsoka: "This is why the people have lost faith in the Jedi. I had, too, until I was reminded of what the Order means to people who truly need us.” 

What a coincidence that Obi-Wan, a man gifted with the gab, fails to counter this criticism as well. Just like Slick.

We literally see the Jedi propping up the Republic system for the near entirely of the War. They allowed "the destruction of innocent life-forms", the clones, men brainwashed and forced into combat. They also conducted military investigations, deferred to the Senate, and I think it's very telling that Rex did not reveal Cut Lawquane's location to either the Jedi or the rest of the Republic. As Generals, they are a part of the hierarchy, and they support the Republic, a hegemony of laws and demarcations. Also, last I checked, Satine isn't a slave, I only wish Obi-Wan had gone out of his way to protect the clones as people, but I guess he only does that for citizens.

As for Order 66, again, this isn't an argument on your part. I'm well-aware of events, nor did I say they deserved to be murdered. The Jedi Order, specificially their leadership, made "poor choices" and it screwed them over. I also find your Nazi allegory more disgusting personally, but whatever. Now, let's see what the Jedi are actually doing.

Dave Filoni: "They’ve, as an institution, existed for a very long time. It doesn’t mean they’re evil or bad, but they’re making a lot of poor choices, and they can’t get out ahead of things in part because they’re desperately attempting to do things the right way and take an even stance.”

The centrist stance the Jedi take on most matters clearly contributed to their downfall. They made "poor choices" and I am critiquing them for it because allowing slavery at the heart of the Republic is not just a poor choice, but a stupid and immoral one. They are 'desperately attempting to do things the right way', but they don't, and this is why actual criticisms are levied at them. Again, I never argued the Jedi were evil, I argued they should be held accountable for their flaws and mistakes, like everyone should be.

I like how you completely misunderstood my point here despite many other people getting it. The problem is that the Jedi do have a choice, it's just a difficult one. However just because doing the right thing is difficult does not mean you shouldn't do it. The problem with the Jedi allowing countless clones, who are slaves, to die for years and that not prompt them to confront, combat or even overthrow the Republic is it makes them very morally bankrupt. As soon as the Republic said it was going to utilise slaves, the Jedi should have realised the Republic was the enemy of human decency itself. But, as we know from just watching Star Wars media with basic critical thinking or this exchange in Rebels...

Ezra: "Master Yoda, you’re powerful. You must know a way to destroy Vader and his Inquisitors.”

Master Yoda: “Padawan, thousands of Jedi once there were. Then came war. In our arrogance, joined the conflict swiftly we did. Fear, anger hate. Consumed by the dark side the Jedi were.”

I think you need to add more depth to your idea of "good". The Jedi were complicit in their own downfall. The fact you have to jump through so many 'logical' hoops to 'explain' and 'absolve' them is evidence enough. The fact you also dismiss all criticism of the Jedi as anti-Jedi propaganda, even when coming from its own members, from Yoda to Ahsoka, who clearly the narrative sides with. Now, as for your 'the citizens did nothing too' whataboutism argument? Yep. So, if you're arguing the Jedi are as bad as Republic citizens who also enabled clone slavery, then sure, a little 'harsh' of you, but that's what you're actually saying here. Plus, you keep both stating the Jedi have a choice and don't have a choice when it suits you throughout this argument.

And, regardless of whether the SW writers verbally acknowledge the word slavery, it is the story they present by saying the clones are "property" who "have no representation in the Senate". You should watch the Riyo Chuchi episodes in Bad Batch again, because this should be impossible to miss in the discussion of "clone rights". Your attempted use of 'rhetorical' questions instead of an actual argument is also pretty uninspired.

You literally didn't "debunk" anything, mademoiselle-cookie. As usual, you used ad hominem attacks, misused terminology, made antisemitic allegories, and now you're upset someone expressed an opinion you dislike. The fact you warn other people not to read my opinion as if you're the guardian of Jedi stan tumblr and they couldn't bear having someone make a post they don't agree with is also hilarious, I would hope people are full of sterner stuff. After all, people always have a choice, whether to read or not.

[goodluckclove]

Back again with yet another question! FOr newly made characters that are in the 'growing pain' parts where they have good bones but not enough writing to fully explore their nuances and facets, how does one... get a good grasp on them a bit faster? Before getting halfway through a draft and realizing *oh wait so there's this part of the character that would've been fun to incorporate since the beginning and now that it's not there it will haunt me*

You don't.

Sorry.

I mean maybe you do? Sometimes? Using my last novel Blind Trust as an example (Because I only know what I've experienced and I claim no authority over the process as a whole), I got a sense of the initial narrator Edgar pretty quickly. He's like a small, kind of pathetic, nervous guy.

The second narrator Scott, on the other hand, I didn't get a full sense of until this one scene about two-thirds into the first draft - so, like, 120k words maybe? There was a moment where he reacted in a certain way and I was just kind of like oh hey there you are.

Which meant I had a LOT of story where Scott wasn't fully Scott. And I could've feasibly gone back and adjusted the first fragment of the manuscript accordingly, but at this point in my career I've finished 13-15 novels (I've lost count) and at this point I know there's a lot that can just be a second-draft problem.

It's like when you forget the name of a distant acquaintance. Yes, you can sit them down and say "You are very boring and made little impression". Or you can just play it cool and act like you know everything, and then quietly find out who they are from a mutual friend as soon as you have a chance.

I know what I consider more productive ;)

I hate emoticons I don't think I pulled that off.

[rnanqo]

how do you keep the momentum going on your original story? i'm impressed and amazed at how often i see a post about something the characters did or about the act you're on now

this is a great question and honestly, treasured online pals who will like my silly posts are so so so important so i am delighted you asked!! but I do wanna break down the motivation/how I keep myself going parts because it took me literal decades to figure out how I work best and take advantage of that

- knowing where the book is going, both storywise and careerwise. the initial idea had a hook and an ending i’m dead set on, so I am constantly writing toward that. I have written so many books where I didn’t have an ending in mind and frankly, ick, blegh, that’s the least successful way for me to write anything. careerwise I’d love for this to be a tradpub debut novel, which means I have to query literary agents, which I have done before, so I know how I need to shape the project and have been tinkering with the query & synopsis on the side, both because doing that helps tighten the story as I go and because I know I hate writing those things after the book is done. basically…plans! I know what work I need to do and i know that I can do it

- also, deadlines! external deadlines are basically the only way I do anything. for the past year and a half I’ve been in a monthly critique group I have to send 5k of writing into every month, and I’m joining a summer novel swap for which I have to have a beta-readable draft by the end of this month. self-imposed deadlines do nothing for me I need to join groups and classes and things

- making tumblr posts about the book and seeing little hearts appear is VERY motivating and I am shaking everyone who’s ever cheered me on in that way gratefully by the hand. yes, you, the person reading this! you help keep me going!! im like tinkerbell if nobody claps i’ll DIE

- momentum does wax and wane though. from mid-March to the end of April I did barely anything on the book because BG3 consumed my brain. but that’s ok!! I felt mildly guilty about it but I find the distractions pass sooner if I just throw myself bodily into them. I’ll always get back to a project eventually

- and the love-of-the-project part. i just love the world and characters I’ve created so much and I like watching them make each other suffer! I’m having fun!!! and I know that that’ll eventually turn into the “I feel nothing for these people and cannot think about them for another second” stage, which is when I will need to take a break and play bg3 for another solid month

- unexpectedly, hozier? the project playlist is like 75% hozier punctuated by a single 3OH!3 song. I do a lot of brainstorming by listening to music on walks/drives and this project imprinted on hozier i guess. thanks hozier!

overall all these things sort of combine into a sense that the book is compelling me to write it, instead of the reverse, which feels like me pulling words out painfully by my fingernails. when I start feeling like I’m dragging the words into existence kicking and screaming, I take a break. obviously nobody’s wholly inspired ALL the time, but I understand how I work and have set things up so there’s always something that spurs me onward. never underestimate the motivational power of being able to shitpost about it

[ozimagines]

could we get some headcanons for Toby and Chris? Specifically ones that ignore how toxic their relationship is lol but still takes place during canon. Basically everything’s the same for the most part except Keller is a decent human being and loves his silly boyfriend

Lol okay I’ll write out their trademark toxicity😂 This one will be a more fluffy version of their relationship. Like the actual relationship part.

(Occurred to me when I finished this that you may have meant canon as in “boyfriends in Oz” whereas I wrote boyfriends out of Oz. If I misinterpreted, because I think that would be cool to write and even if you don’t want it I may write it anyway, just reask “Beecher X Keller in Oz”. I just get a lot of out of Oz asks so it’s my default.)

Tobias Beecher X Chris Keller (Fluff)…

Okay so they’re finally boyfriends. Fuck Schillinger. Fuck Oz. They belong to each other.

They’re a very kissy couple. Some couples are very cuddly some are very huggy, I think they’re very kissy.

They like to say hello with a kiss. Chris leaning down to kiss Beecher’s head. Beecher kissing Keller’s neck to get his attention. Kissing each other’s hands and every single finger just to feel one another.

Holly is VERY protective of her dad. She immediately distrusts Keller. He initially tries to win her trust like he would any woman’s. He buys her a bracelet with lots of charms (they’re like lipstick and nail polish charms and she doesn’t like it at all). Realizing his error, he gets her a new bracelet with the Arsenal cannon on it and a soccer ball. Better, but she’s still uneasy.

Beecher doesn’t want to tell her about his relationship with Keller. He thinks it might confuse her after her mom and Gary’s death. What confuses her is the ambiguity.

One day, Beecher is dressing upstairs. Keller comes in and sees only Holly. He tries to make small talk, asking about school, but she stops him.

“Look, I know you like my dad the way my mom liked my dad. I know what gay is. If you’re gonna be his boyfriend, we have some ground rules.”

Keller can’t stifle a laugh. She’s very serious and perceptive for her age.

“Okay, Holly. That’s fair. What’re your terms?”😂

“Keep the sex quiet.”

Keller barks a loud laugh and nods his head. Seemed fair. She started talking about her dad and how he was a nice guy. Keller agreed. He sat down with her, handed her a pen and paper, and told her to draft all her terms for him. He’s grinning ear to ear. At least the kid was talking to him.

Beecher comes down to a full constitutional write up of all their rights and responsibilities.

“I need something to call you.”

“Chris.”

“But you’re an adult.” She shook her head. “‘Dad’ and ‘dad’ will get too confusing. How about ‘Dad’ and ‘Pop’. You’ll be Pop.”

He’s genuinely honored by this. He shakes her hand and signs the form. He reads the byline at the bottom. Take care of my dad, please.

After that, they become a family of three.

Keller really buckles down and gets to know Beecher.

He knows how Beecher likes his steak (medium) and when Holly isn’t around, makes jokes like “who doesn’t like a hot pink center”, which Beecher always rolls his eyes to.

Keller is picky about vegetables. He hates them “Al dente”. Loves his broccoli and Brussels sprouts to be cooked through completely.

Keller’s a steak and potatoes guy, but Beecher likes to try new things so suddenly all his food has balsamic reductions and lemon Parmesan this and soy sauce and honey that. Keller would be just as happy with salt and pepper.

Keller’s nicknames for Beecher: Beech Ball, Toby, Tobes, Tobert (don’t ask), sweet lips, Goldie locks, baby, love.

Beecher’s nicknames for Keller: Chris, Chrissy (playful), Topher (Chris hates this one), bright eyes, and the classic babe.

Chris likes to do this thing where in public, he’ll narrate other people’s conversations to Beecher, usually making them outlandish or completely sexual. Beecher is usually telling him to stop through tears of laughter. 😆

Beecher is a window shopper. Loves seeing things at the mall and going “ooh! Let’s go see that! What? I just wanna look.”

Holly and Chris usually side eye each other and take bets on how long he’ll really be.

“Ten minutes.”

“I’ll take thirty, pop.”

“You’re on.”

Keller has an unresolved sweet tooth. He’ll tell Beecher to go get the essentials at the store, guiding Holly to go with him.

“We’re just gonna go look at the toys.” -Chris, sly smile not fooling anyone.

“No candy, Chris. I’ve got dinner in the crock pot.” -Tobias, lover of Pinterest crock pot recipes.

“I just wanna go see the Minecraft legos, dad.” -Holly, already thinking of the candy spree Chris is gonna take her on.

When they come back, Chris and Holly have a cart filled with gummy coke bottles, M&Ms (peanut, regular, peanut butter, and caramel), caramel apple lollipops, and all the fun bubble gums.

Toby rolls his eyes as Chris and Holly high five.

They get a small karaoke machine for the house for when Holly has her friends over. The boys get more use out of it than she does.

“I’ll tell you what I want what ai really really want!” -Toby

“So tell me what you want what you really really want!” -Chris

“Dad. Pop. Stop.” -Holly

Both are dads that do not get embarrassed easily.

Before Holly and Adebayo officially start dating, Chris notices the two of them saying goodbye when he and Toby pick her up from school.

“It’ll be funny.” Chris insists.

“Not to Holly.” Beecher reasoned, smiling the whole time.

“Im doing it.” Chris lays on the horn to get Holly’s attention. She and Ade turn to the car where Chris yells out; “Holly! Who’s your cute friend?”

Holly and Ade turn bright red and Beecher and Keller crack up in the car. Holly is not amused.

“You two need help.”

Couples costumes are fun. Surprisingly, Beecher’s the one who needs to be convinced.

“I’ll be Han. You can be Leia.”

“Pass.”

“Indiana Jones and Marian?”

“Why is it always Harrison Ford with you?”

“…The Fugitive? I’ll be Kimble, you be… his kid.”

They alternate picking movies. They have strong opinions.

“Chris, I will break up with you if you call Die Hard a Christmas movie again.”

“Takes place during Christmas, don’t it? Check and mate, bitch.”

Forces Keller to watch one of their favorite movies together; A Fish Called Wanda (1988).

“I’m like Cleese and you’re like Curtis, right?” -Chris

“Cleese, the bumbling innocent lawyer and Curtis the manipulative flirty criminal? Yeah, you’re the chick this time, buddy.” -Toby

“Who’s Kline?” -Chris

“…Robson.” -Toby

They both crack up.

They show Holly their favorite 80s movies and then struggle to explain the problematic stuff.

“So she didn’t know it was him, and he had sex with her? Idk guys, it’s not a good look at least.”

Both have their heads in their hands by the end, unable to speak.

Chris works lots of nights and Beecher works during the day, but they always make time for each other. Beecher goes to Keller’s bar and sits at the end. Chris comes to deliver lunch to Toby at work.

Their show together is Cheers. Keller likes Sam Malone and Beecher likes Frazier. Holly watch’s with them and likes Lilith.

“If I were Sam, I’d stop wasting my time on Diane and Rebecca and jump the bones of the cute intellectual that comes in every day.” Keller says, leaning into Beecher and licking his ear. Toby blushes.

“Cute bad boys look like his type.”

“Cute?”

“Shut up, baby.” Toby laughs.

“Guys.” Holly interjects with a monotone. “Get several rooms, please.”

They do “the switch” every time they go out for food.

Keller gets the croutons on Beecher’s salad and Beecher gets the tomato on Keller’s burger.

One time, Beecher orders a ribeye, medium and it comes out rare. Beecher can’t eat it but refuses to call over their server, as he doesn’t want to “bother her”. Keller can’t contain his laughter.

“Just tell her to cook it more, it’s not that big a deal.”

“Yeah, but she’ll just feel like she messed up and it’s really not her fault.”

“Babe, your steak is still mooing.”

“Chris, it’s fine. I’ll eat it like this.” Cuts off a piece and goes to take a bite when he hears Keller moo softly from his seat. “Chris, I swear to God.”

Keller is still mooing softly and Beecher is kicking him under the table when the server comes over to ask how things are.

“Burger is cooked to perfection. We need a couple more minutes on the steak though, hon”. Keller lets her know, informing Beecher’s blushing face.

Every time a restaurant gets Toby’s order wrong, Keller is the one to ask for the right thing.

Keller and Holly play video games together. They start off with Call of Duty and move onto Halo. She even gets him into Minecraft.

“Punch that tree.”

“Punch? The tree?”

“That’s how you get wood until you build an axe.”

One day, Chris walks into Holly crying at her desk. Apparently some older kids completely ransacked her base.

Keller is livid.

Joins the world and makes it his personal mission to track them down and make them pay.

He finds their camp and waits for night to completely take it down. He brought buckets of lava, kept his inventory empty to take Holly’s stuff back, and even lures a hoard of monsters to their home and lets them through the gates.

He waits for them to rebuild and then he just tears it down again. He does this every day for a month. By the end, there’s a chest at the front labeled: “For KillerKeller1998, please stop destroying our stuff.”

Keller gives Holly the coordinates and they build her base back together. She’s got more than before.

“That’s what you’ve got to do, Hols. Every time they take from you, you take double from them. Until they can’t afford to keep picking on you.”☠️

Keller dresses up like Santa on Christmas. It’s not fooling Holly in the slightest but she plays along because she knows it makes them happy.

After they put Holly to bed, Tobias makes them hot chocolate downstairs.

“If you add ginger it’s supposed to bring out the flavor.”

“Another Pinterest hack?”

“…shut up.”

Keller forces Beecher to sit on his lap and tell him what he wants for Christmas.

Beecher’s laughing quietly the whole time just so Holly can sleep.

“C’mon, I’m serious.” He slaps his thighs. “Park it here, baby, I wanna make that holiday wish come true.”

Beecher sits on his lap, still giggling and supporting both of their hot chocolates by now.

“And what would you like, little boy?” Keller boomed for effect.

“Toy fire truck.” 🚒

“Fuck you, what do you really want?”

“Pretty sure Santa doesn’t say fuck you.”

“He does when someone’s spitting bullshit. What do you want?”

Tobias thought for a second, touching his hair and rubbing around his eyes. Chris knows he’s trying not to cry.

“I just… I don’t want this to be a dream. I don’t want to wake up back in Oz.”

Keller drops the act and holds his boyfriend.

“We got each other, we got Holly, that’s the most important thing.”

Beecher and Keller are two doofus dads just trying to give Holly the best life.

For every holiday, they do something special. For Christmas, it’s watching old movies in their pjs. For Halloween it’s watching scary movies and teasing Beecher. For Mardi Gras, Keller hops to the roof and throws beads off for her.

Beecher always finds couples activities for them. Like he asks Keller to take him swing dancing. Keller thinks its stupid as fuck but Beecher flashes those puppy eyes and Keller just can’t say no.

Keller complains like a bitch the whole first lesson, and Toby stops off in a huff. Holly lets him know he fucked up.

“He bought those oxfords specifically for that class.”

Keller talks to Beecher about it, and Beecher is a little heated at first. Keller tries goofing him out of it.

“Your honor, I would like to present the case that one Christopher Keller is not that big an ass.”

Toby’s giggling again, and Chris pulls him onto his lap and kisses his forehead.

Toby admits he had a crush on James Dean and thought the idea of Keller in a leather jacket swing dancing with him was sexy.

Beecher comes home the next day to find Keller there, in jeans and a leather jacket, cigarette hanging off his lips, smirk on his face.

Good god he almost spontaneously ejaculated.

Keller treats him right the whole night, takes him swing dancing, and even finds a fifties Pop a Top open, and grabs hot dogs and Cokes after.

They’re in the booth, and Beecher is cuddling Keller.

“Thanks, Dean.” He whispers.

“Yeah, yeah.” Keller takes a bite of his hot dog. “So when’re you gonna dress up like Michelle Pfeiffer for me?”

Beecher actually does on Keller’s birthday. Long satin number like in Scarface. Keller is speechless.

Neither proposes to the other. They’re happy in their domestic partnership, a ring is just a ring, right?

Well, one night, after dinner, Holly makes a PowerPoint presentation to show them.

“This is why we make a good family.”

Holly takes them through their relationship and everything they’ve done as a family.

Keller and Beecher are holding hands, looking at pictures of themselves on birthdays and anniversaries.

They laugh at Keller holding a snake at Beecher’s face on a wildlife preservation. They cry at Keller seeing Gary’s grave for the first time because Beecher wanted them to meet.

Holly concludes the presentation with a picture of all three of them together at a restaurant. Beecher’s stealing Keller’s fries and Keller is giving Holly a noogie.

“Holly, that’s lovely.”

“Yeah, thanks, kid.”

“So… do it.”

They’re both still a little confused. Holly rolls her eyes and pulls out two rings. They’re cracker jack box rings. They’re engraved. “I love you, dad”. She admits she spent her allowance on the engravings.

“Like in Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Daddy, sing moon river.”

The guys are a little stunned. They just keep exchanging looks. Keller breaks first, laughing his goddamn ass off.

“The balls on this kid.” -*has never been prouder* turns to Beecher with a grin on his face. “How bout it, hon. Wanna get married?”

Beecher is speechless. Keller and Holly just keep looking at him expectantly.

“Of course. I… thank you, Holly.”

Later that night, they’re about to go to bed, and Keller stops Beecher and hands him some legal papers.

“Divorcing me already? I’ll be the first Ex Mr Keller.”

“Shut up and read, dummy.”

“I… these are adoption papers.”

“Didn’t want to tell the kid before I ran it by you first. In case you weren’t on board. I’d understand. I still want to marry you, Tobes. But I want everything that comes with that.”

“You…”

“I want to marry you and legally adopt Holly. What’s so damn difficult to understand?”

Beecher thinks about this for a second. He’d never considered that Keller wanted to adopt Holly.

“You realize… if we split… if I wanted to… I could get child support from you?”

“Yes.”

“That doesn’t… that’s not a thought in your mind? I’m giving you free legal advice.”

Keller smiles his shark like grin.

“We’re not gonna split so it’s not a concern.”

“But if we do-“

“Then it would be an honor to get to help raise her, even through child support. She’s an amazing kid, Tobes.”

“Chris, I’m just… this is legal adoption. You can’t just be done with it whenever-“

Chris is on his feet, nose to nose with Beecher, but it’s not threatening.

“I’m not ever gonna be done with you, Toby. Or Holly. You guys gave me a life. I want both of you to be mine. Legally. Visit you guys in the hospital or go on trips as a family. Share my healthcare with you guys and provide for you. She wants two dads right? Not just one dad and dad’s boyfriend? Then I want all of it. All the rights and responsibilities of my child.”

Beecher and Keller spoon all night, talking it over. But Beecher’s already said yes. Because Keller called her “my child”.

He they take Holly to the movies and then to the fair. Keller wins her a bigass squishmallow shaped like a frog. They buy her popcorn and cokes all day!

“Am I dying guys?”

They take Holly aside and give her the space to respond however she’s going to.

“Holly?”

“Yeah, pop?”

Keller’s never been so nervous in his life.

Beecher starts.

“First of all, I want to make it clear. If this isn’t something you want, it’s not something that’s going to happen. And if you say no, you’re not changing anything. Chris and I are still getting married.”

“Jesus, what? You’re scaring me.”

Chris gets her attention and holds her hand.

“Holly, I’ve never had any kids. You’re the first. But I want you to really be the first. There are certain legal and medical benefits to this.”

“Just say what you want to say.”

“I… I want to legally adopt you so that Toby and I have equal rights over you. Medical decisions. Emergency contact. Custody if we ever… well,” he smiled to himself. “No point worrying about what’s not gonna happen. Point is, ball’s in your court. Or… goalie box? I don’t know a thing about soccer. Whatever you want.”

“So like, if I skipped school they’d call you?”

“Yeah.”

“And if I had a stomach ache and dad was busy you could come and get frosties with me?”

“Not sure how a frosty would help a stomach ache, but yeah sure.”

“And when kids at school say you’re not my real dad or I can’t have two dads I can just be like uh no, stupid, it’s legal.”

“You can do that anyway, but again, sure.”

She lunges into his arms and hugs her new *official* dad.

He adopts her a week before the wedding. (So her adoption day could be its own special day)

She’s their ring bearer. Holly insisted on wearing a suit to match her dads’.

It’s a nice, simple church wedding.

Toby finds Chris in back of the Church after service. He looks upset.

“Remember when I said I wish God would choose me.”

“I do recall.”

“I think he did.”

Toby smiles and pulls his husband over into his arms. He kisses the new Mr. Keller-Beecher on the head.

“Me too.”❤️

[justworthlessreblogs]

scattered thoughts on kirapika

this has taken me way longer than it should've tbh, i have 4 different essay drafts in my docs but none of them felt satisfactory. in the end it's probably better to make a list anyways, because there isn't really an overarching through line to any of these

putting this under a read more because it's Long. there's going to be a (much shorter, hopefully) part 2 because i hit the character limit oops

fair warning that there's going to be a lot of complaining about ciel (i don't hate her i swear i just have beef with how her character's framed in the show)

i think the most frustrating thing about their arc is the wasted potential. like they're both really great characters, there's some really great setup, and the series initially takes the angle that the conflict isn't completely black and white. and then 23 happens and rio gets kicked out of the narrative and the writers decide that actually no, ciel can't do anything wrong in her life ever because she's their precious golden child

i've said it before and i'll say it again: the coma was literally the worst decision the show could've made, because it robbed rio of basically all of his character development and it left ciel floundering around without anything to do. like genuinely when watching her episodes during the coma era i was sometimes like "...what is her arc here supposed to be again? because it really just kinda feels like she's fucking around" and it doesn't help that the writers were still on their Ciel is Morally Right in All Situations kick so any conflicts she got into were kinda boring, tbh? this usually isn't an issue for me in precure except this is a season where characters *do* fuck up (aoi, himari, yukari all had episodes where they fucked up/weren't totally in the right/did some morally gray [for precure] things in this same stretch!) so it makes ciel stick out like a sore thumb (i am still salty about 34 robbing me of an actual disagreement between ciel and yukari)

i think i mentioned it in wv 7's author's notes but episode 41 is kind of a disappointment for me. i thought the premise sounded fun (rio gets framed because of an evil clone! there's so much fun you can have with that!) but the actual execution kinda flops. we barely get any evil clone shenanigans, first of all, but my bigger issue is with the kirapika dynamic and conflict in the episode. i think it drags both of their characters down.

in 41, ciel suddenly regresses and starts being kind of an ass to her brother again, but the problem is that... she doesn't really start doing this until *after* the emotional conflict is supposedly resolved? at some point she goes "and i nearly messed it all up again" and i was like Girl. What Have You Done Up To This Point. like she's literally done *nothing*, hasn't said anything hurtful - the "worst" she's done is telling her brother that she'll go with him if he leaves, and then backtracking in private (the backtracking does feed into another issue i have, but in isolation there's nothing wrong with it! i do think it's perfectly reasonable to not want to uproot your entire life!). the actual regression comes when they're on the bridge, when ciel tells rio that they both made cure parfait

the cure parfait line is genuinely cruel. pov you are rio kuroki, you just got out of a 4 month coma 3 days ago, you got cool powers for 15 minutes but then got beat up super badly and lost them almost immediately after *and* were told you'd never be a precure (a dream that you've tried and tried to achieve but nothing ever seems to work) and then here's your sister on the bridge telling you that you both made *her* a precure and it was a super cool and awesome event when all you got out of it was that four month coma. if i was rio i would've lost my shit then and there

the line just feels so ooc for ciel to be saying at the EMOTIONAL CLIMAX??? THIS IS THE EMOTIONAL CRUX OF THE EPISODE. if it was a line that had happened early on and caused the conflict i'd be more forgiving but it *isn't* and that's why it fails! at this point she's supposed to have learned that disregarding others' feelings and thinking only about what's good for herself hurts others!

also rio once again takes the blame for everything, just like he did in 23. why is rio constantly always the bad guy in the conflict (even though the show pushed a "they both did things wrong" angle at the start) it makes their relationship feel really lopsided

their relationship just feels really lopsided overall, tbh. i think part of the problem is that we never really get any positive interactions between them in the series - we get the flashback with the waffles, and then there's that brief moment when rio comes back in 40, and ciel complimenting rio in the christmas episode but that's barely enough to go on when most of their major interactions in the present timeline are them fighting with one another. the show wants me to think that kirapika are the Best Siblings Ever but doesn't really do the work to actually *show* it, which makes it feel hollow. where are the sibling shenanigans, toei. where are the moments where they share a single brain cell. i just want kirapika sibling fluff, dammit!

part of this lopsided feeling also comes from how it feels like rio would move heaven and earth for ciel (he outright sacrifices his life. if it wasn't for luimere he'd be dead, and he had no way of knowing lumiere would intervene) but i don't get that same vibe from ciel even though the show tries acting like she would. shit happens and she's like "oh no! anyways". even a large part of her angstfest in 23 is more about her thinking that she's thrown away her chance of being a precure (it's literally one of the first things she says after julio's purified. not really a great look tbh).

lopsided 3: ciel's feelings are always seen as more valid over rio's. it's especially frustrating when rio actually does have a point (see 22-23)

honestly overall it just feels like the writers had something against rio. genuinely what the fuck did he do to them to make them toss him around like that

ciel's angstfest in 23 is really funny to me it's literally the equivalent of when you slightly mess up so you turn your discord pfp and banner all black and change your username to "gone" and claim you're never going to log on again but you're back 2 days later. i would love it if she was the one who actually broke herself out of it instead of rio and ichika having to do all the emotional labor

just... let ciel have flaws! we're shown a ciel with flaws in her introductory arc! and it's amazing! but then after 23 they all disappear and on the rare occasions where they come back they're never treated as something for her to work on, they're just there, or they're unintentional on the part of the writers. and a character without flaws obviously isn't unheard of for precure but in a season that takes great pains to remind you that its main cures are all very flawed people it feels a little jarring to have ciel never learning anything because she was in the right all along

i don't think rio becoming ciel's satellite post-coma would've annoyed me as much if we hadn't been given a taste of rio as an actual defined character during the julio arc. like once he comes back he only exists around ciel and it's a bummer because i really liked his dynamics with ichika, yukari, bibury, etc and i wanted to see more (we do get that one riobib scene in 41 but it's like 30 seconds). pretty much all of his dreams and aspirations evaporate, too, most notably The Precure One

rio's dream to become a precure never being brought up after 23 (except to be mocked by grave) is so, so jarring when it was originally a huge part of his character. 41 tries to act like he only became julio because he wasn't as good at sweets as ciel and it's like... no? wanting to become a precure was a big part of that too? sometimes i feel like 41 is an episode from some alternate universe where rio's precure dream was never part of the plot and it somehow wormed its way into ours. it'd make the cure parfait line a lot less worse if that was the case tbh

see you all in part 2 i guess

[problematic-camren]

I am quite uncertain how we have ended here, but Enid and I are currently in my bed -- she initially wants me to go to hers, but I do not want to have another allergic reaction at the mere contact of her horrifically colorful linens, so I put my foot down and insist we stay here where it's dark and comfortable (similar to a paralyzing nightmare) -- and her mouth is doing things to my neck. Inexplicably wonderful things.

Normally, I would have already stabbed a random bitch if they so much as put their grimy lips on my skin, but this is Enid... I would never stab her. I may threaten her with assault, or bully her until she cries, or traumatize her with gruesome pictures she hates, but I will never hurt my roommate.

Yes, sometimes, when she annoys me with her loud pop music, and vomit-inducing positivity so early in the morning, I would fantasize tying her up in bed (to torture her), or maybe stripping off her nauseatingly colorful clothing (to figure out the best places I could do the most damage without leaving physical marks), or maybe biting her (not too hard that it'll leave marks -- unless she wants to), or probably -- a personal favorite -- choking her (only mildly, just so she will stop speaking for a few seconds and give me my much-needed peace of mind), but I never have thought about disfiguring her.

I think her skin is beautiful, and her body is too amazing to stab at. I am just complimenting her as a roommate, by the way. What is it these vapid kids nowadays say? No homo.

Anyway, so here I am, half-reclined on my bed, and Enid is still doing things to my neck. Oh, she licked me. Is there a draft in the room? Why did I shiver? What is this feeling in my belly? Is it hunger? But I just had dinner.

Her teeth grazes my skin -- a little too pointy, in my fair assessment -- and before I could even make sense of what is going on, I feel her teeth sinking into that sensitive part of my neck. A little too hard, because I feel a small prick of pain, which, truth be told, I am not averse to. But I am right in my assessment that her teeth are a little too pointy. I surmise it's the werewolf genes in her. Why am I getting excited at the idea of Enid turning into a werewolf?

"Oh my god, Wednesday, did I hurt you? I'm so sorry!" she gasps.

She lifts her head up to look at me, clearly panicking.

I don't understand why.

"Hurt me? I like it, I have an unbelievably high pain tolerance," I shrug, offering my neck for more bites.

"But you're bleeding," she whimpers apologetically.

"So?" I look at her, not understanding her point.

"So? You're hurt!"

"Hurt me more, please. It makes me less homesick."

I close my eyes once again and wait for her to nibble on my neck once more.

(Follow me on wattpad... I'll be posting more shit in there.)