#but calling obi-wan hypocritical because of satine...

[jewishcissiekj]

yeah I'm not recommending this book.

[transmalewife]

I don’t want to bother you if you don’t want to do another SW meta, but if you don’t mind another TCW question: What did you think of Satine as a character? What about her relationship to Obi-Wan, and how it affects his character?

No bother at all, I had a few train rides to fill and I can't seem to make myself write any of my sw thoughts down these days but these asks are drawing them out of me so feel free to keep sending them in, though i can’t promise timely responses.

In short, I'm pretty ambivalent about her. She's nowhere near my favorite character, but I do think she's one of the most solid and important additions to canon tcw made. Maybe that's why I don't think that much about her, she fits the story, she's, even within the narrative, an echo of the past, and she doesn't infuriate me like some characters do, so she sort of just slides off my brain.

I don't ship her with Obi-Wan in the time tcw takes place, so i'm glad thats not what you asked. I am however a hopeless romantic so i do have a soft spot for the idea of a first love coming back into your life. They still love each other, because they learned what love even is together. They also hate each other because first loves never end well. They have more history than they know what to do with, they know exactly how far they can push each other, and will cross the line maliciously, just to get a rise out of the other, to get attention. They both behave like children in the first episodes she's in and i love that so much. It humanises Obi-Wan, and I love how a lot of stuff outside the movies is dedicated to exploring his own attachments and the ways he (doesn't) deal with it, which nicely foreshadows both his own attachment to Anakin letting him ignore all the warning signs, and also how he „taught” anakin to „deal” with it. Speaking of which.

That fucking conversation. That conversation in which obi-wan actually gives anakin an out, tries to get him to open up about padme, even showing vulnerability by admiting to loving satine which honestly for this man is like actual torture, and anakin goes full on parks and rec i have never had sex with anyone, anywhere, she's terrible, face wise monologue, goes shut up she's my friend. In an entirely normal and totally not suspicious way, and obi-wan goes alrighty then that's my parenting done for the week, back to my favorite place: denial. That fucking conversation is the best and worst thing to come out of clone wars. Because it makes everything so much more tragic if anakin had a chance to come clean, if obi-wan knew all along, but kept quiet to protect them. it makes them both so much more culpable, anakin for not talking and obi wan for not pushing. But of course this is clone wars so its done in the stupidest way ever.

But yeah it makes sense he wouldn't snitch on anakin when he'd just seen satine again, and was reminded of his own attachments. So I do appreciate the depth Satine adds to Obi-Wan’s character. Do you see the problem here, though? She is more interesting as a character arc for Obi-Wan than a character in her own right. Not only, there is a lot of interesting things about her story, just mostly. Because outside of Obi-Wan she kinda doesn’t stand for much. Like ok, for example her brand of pacifism is hypocritical and idealistic, and you could read that as an analogy and critique to the jedi’s values. But the story doesn’t bother to pause and point that out when shes calling for help and in the background her royal guard is shooting people to protect her. No, the irony only matters when Obi-Wan freezes up before killing a guy to save her, and i like how it reads less like noble warrior monk reminded of his vows and more like middle aged man ashamed of looking bad in front of his ex, because he doesn’t usually have any problems with this kind of self defense violence.

Women in star wars in general is a really interesting topic, and I do wanna write some meta about all five of them at some point. One thing you have to give them is the female characters, while few, are always extremely well rounded, and more importantly in this case, varied. No two women in star wars are the same, and none of the important ones are sexy lamps (although most of the ones in the background are), which is still tragically rare in the genre. And Satine is absolutely no exception. She is undeniably her own character, with a complete personality, a complex backstory and understandable motivations. It’s just a bit of a shame that this only ever seems to matter as a plot point in Obi-Wan’s story, but that’s something star wars loves doing with its complex and interesting female characters: torturing and killing them to further the tragedy of male characters.

And the thing about satine in particular is, Ok so remember how in that last one i said season 6 went off the rails when it started just regurgitating and reminding the audience of plot points from rots without really thinking through the consequences of idk the council knowing about the chips and the fact dooku put them there and not doing anything about it anyway? I think homage, references etc can be really fun when used well, but they only work as additions to a well plotted story, you can't start with the references and try to build a plot out of them. So whenever I think of Satine I do feel like someone is nudging me and going hey d'you get it? Her name is satine, Its like moulin rouge, she died in his arms there so that's what we're gonna do here. And I have to actively stop myself from rolling my eyes. I mean idk if that was ever officially confirmed as inspiration but come on. Anyway, because of that Satine becomes the opposite of most of tcw, an actually compelling character built on top of a profoundly stupid premise.

But, I’m not gonna say like, every female character that’s a part of a man’s tragic past is useless and sexist. Star wars does overuse that trope, and it especially feels weird paired with how satine does feel pulled out of someone’s ass the day before the script was due (by someone very good at bullshitting essays for great grades, sure, I say this as someone who has dabbled in this art as well, but that faint trace of wallpapering over holes in your reasoning is there.) but, there is an already established at the time female character I would have loved to see furthering obi-wan’s pain in tcw: Siri tachi. I need to finally read some of the books with her, bc the little i know is from legends wookiepedia articles, but she would have been the perfect character to explore the order’s fucked up views on attachment. I get that the jedi/politician parallel between anidala and obitine was important, but it does get repetitive after a while when the narrative keeps putting other jedi in very similar situations as anakin and going ‘see? This is what a well adjusted person would have done. Murder is bad!’ like. Yeah we know murder is bad. Maybe let’s explore why Anakin did so much of it anyway. slavery, right? Oh ok cool the council sent him on a mission to save a hutt’s baby, even though he was owned by a hutt when he was a fucking baby. Oh this time he has to pretend to be a slaver and sell his own padawan. Cool.

And I have mixed feelings of tcw’s treatment of the attachment thing, bc at times it seems to be more consciously and in its trademark very obvious way exploring how yeah maybe ‘love is bad’ is not gonna make for stable people (I KNOW i’m oversimplifying it’s 1 am leave me alone), but at times it does seem to lean hard into look anakin is bad because he’s in love. Here’s obi wan also in love but he’s normal about it like a good jedi. And i think siri in tcw would have been a great way to specifically explore the issues with the code’s rules on attachment, and not just the conflict of interest of a neutral detached knight in secret forbidden love with a planetary ruler, but without all the murder, see anakin, this is how you should deal with it. This is totally fine.

Anyway i’m gonna leave you with the last line of siri’s canon wookiepedia article that i think about every time i see someone saying there was nothing wrong with the code. I actually recommend the whole article it’s just one paragraph but very… poignant

“Kenobi then said that he only had to think about touching hands with Tachi at the Temple to think that he had deserved punishment from the Jedi Council.”

[zelenacat]

When We Were Young- An Obitine Story- Chapter 17

After meeting the new government officials personally and sending them off to do their jobs, much of Satine’s time was spent with the Corruption Committee. It began with mandatory inspections, questionnaires, wage increases, and tighter import laws. At the end of every day, the Duchess found herself exhausted.

“How are you little ones,” she asked her stomach, cradling the now noticeable lump, “we’ve had quite the day haven’t we?”

A knock came at the door and Khaami got up to get it.

“It’s Hera.” 

The door opened and the nurse stepped inside, hauling a large bag with her. Khaami shut the door and locked it.

“I know it may look like a lot, Your Grace,” Hera set her bag down, “but there are many tests we have yet to run.”

“Such as?”

“You may need vitamins,” Hera looked up, a bottle in each hand, “and certainly calcium pills.”

The Duchess relented and lay back against her pillows. Parna pulled down her covers. 

“How have you been feeling lately?” the nurse asked, approaching Satine with a stethoscope.

“Tired mostly,” the Duchess answered, “although I have been trying to get my rest.”

Hera listened and placed her stethoscope on Satine’s stomach, waiting. 

“Everything sounds good,” she smiled, “but I did bring the portable ultrasound just in case.”

As the blurry images of two blob-like shapes became vaguely recognizable as human, the Duchess swallowed hard.

“Satine?” Parna questioned.

“I haven’t called Ben in a while,” she confessed, “and I still haven’t told him.”

Hera looked up, “I take it Ben is the father?”

“Yes,” Khaami answered for Satine, “and he has quite the high-profile job.”

“Dear me,” Hera seemed to want to ask something, but then thought better of it, “I assume it’s best the less I know.”

“Yes,” Satine nodded, “but I will tell you that I love him.”

“I wouldn’t think anything else, Your Grace.”

The Duchess smiled at that, at least there were some who knew her true character.

“Just to be safe,” Hera stood, “I suggest you take vitamins and calcium pills, prenatal pills would be too risky I think.”

“I agree,” Satine nodded, “but I appreciate your help, I want my girls to be healthy.”

“I’m sure they will be.” Hera grinned.

Khaami helped the nurse to the door while Parna changed Satine into her nightdress.

“How is the status of the birth basement?” Satine asked, feeling weird even to call it that.

“Almost ready,” Khaami answered, “we have towels, blankets, numbing shots, diapers, but Oiyo still needs a new battery.”

“Perhaps Hera could be of help.” Satine suggested.

“Yes,” the Duchess nodded, “enlist her on that.”

“I am still worried about the falsified documents,” Parna confessed, “are you sure we’re untraceable?”

“Let’s begin withdrawing some of my personal funds,” Satine instructed, “we’ll pay upfront.”

Khaami stood, “I will go speak with Hera.”

Parna grabbed Satine’s comm.

“I suggest you call your Jedi.”

Satine swallowed, “I hardly know what I’ll say.”

“Conversation will flow naturally,” Parna smiled, “I can tell he cares for you.”

The Duchess nodded, grateful for her lady, then dismissed Parna.

Satine pressed a button, “Ben?”

No response.

“Obi?”

The third time, Satine succeeded.

“Hello, darling,” Obi-Wan’s voice was slightly strained, “it’s been a while.”

Satine was not fooled, “What’s happening, Obi?”

“We’re recovering after a battle.”

“Don't tell me they put you on the front lines again,” Satine frowned, “you just recovered.”

“I made for a good patient.” Obi-Wan replied.

Satine sighed, “You need your rest, Ben.”

“I can’t,” Obi-Wan swallowed, “I can't sleep when I dream of you.”

The Duchess found herself at a loss for words. Obi-Wan turned on his holo-figure and Satine could physically see his worry.

“Love?”

Satine turned her holo-figure on, “You’re such a romantic, Ben.”

Obi-Wan actually laughed at that.

“Do you know when you’ll be coming home?” Satine asked hopefully.

“Not as long as we thought I think,” Obi-Wan smiled, “I should be relieved in about two or three months.”

The Duchess’ face fell.

“Satine?”

“That’s still a long time, Obi.” she whimpered.

“I can only hope that it’ll be sooner,” the Jedi replied, “I think of you all the time.”

“You’re often on my mind as well.” Satine confessed.

“And how are politics now,” Obi-Wan asked, “any corruption arrests?”

“We’ve had a handful in the past two months,” Satine nodded, “though I still worry for my government.”

“If anyone can pull her system through this,” the jedi winked, “it's you, Satine.”

“I appreciate your kind words, Ben.”

A moment of sad silence filtered into the conversation and Satine drew in a breath.

“Obi-Wan?”

“Yes?” The Jedi sounded concerned.

“There’s something I need to tell you.”

“Ah yes, your medical situation?”

The way he said it, Satine wondered if he already knew.

“Ben,” tears welled in Satine’s eyes, “I was afraid, so I kept putting off telling you, but-”

“Satine,” Obi-Wan’s voice grew quiet, “are you-”

“Yes,” the Duchess sobbed, “five whole months.”

It was a long time before Obi-Wan spoke again.

“Ben, Ben, please answer me.”

“I thought you were sick,” the Jedi’s voice quivered, “I thought you were being stubborn.”

“I’m sorry.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry about, Satine,” Obi-Wan suddenly dropped a mask over himself, Satine could see it through the hologram, “but are your duties overwhelming you?”

“No,” Satine shook her head, “please don’t be mad at me, Ben, I didn’t know what to do and what would happen.”

“You obviously want to keep the baby-”

“Obi-”

“So who will raise it?”

“Them,” Satine corrected, “twin girls.”

Obi-Wan sighed.

“And there’s another thing,” Satine bit her lip, “I’ve been lying to you for nearly eighteen years.”

The Jedi’s brow furrowed, “What?”

“Ben,” the Duchess swallowed, “there are other children.”

Obi-Wan froze, his mouth half-open in shock.

“Four others.”

“You’ve lied to me,” Obi-Wan repeated, “for this long?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

It came out as a whisper, that’s what broke Satine.

“My enemies would’ve claimed I wasn’t Mandalorian and they would've never accepted you as my spouse. And now, I fear they’ll call me a Republic Sympathizer and a hypocrite.”

“You are,” Obi-Wan crossed his arms, “you can’t promote neutrality if you have ties to one side.”

“Padme knows,” Satine argued, “and she’s been ever so helpful.”

Obi-Wan leaned back in shock, “Anakin knows, and Quinlan too.”

“They’ve met the children, they knew immediately.”

The Jedi was mad. Satine could see it.

“I have children, six children,” he asked, “and yet I was the last one to know.”

“Ben-”

Obi-Wan was aghast, “Why wouldn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t want to compromise your morals.” Satine frowned.

“Morals? Morals! Satine, these are my children!”

“Being a Jedi means everything to you, Obi,” Satine sighed, “I fell in love with the chivalrous knight in you, you would’ve been a completely different person had you left the Order because of me.”

“So you thought about it,” Obi-Wan was suddenly far away, “you thought about saying the word?”

“Yes.”

“And you didn’t.”

Satine swallowed, she didn’t know how to respond.

Obi-Wan scoffed, “Do you even love me?”

“Ben-”

“No, Satine,” Obi-Wan’s rage finally boiled over, “you made a decision without me, one that affected both of us, and you made the wrong choice.”

“Obi-Wan-”

“You lied to me,” growled the Jedi, tears in his eyes, “I could’ve been a father.”

“You are a father.”

Obi-Wan went silent.

“Do the children know.”

“Yes, I’ll ask if they’d meet with you.”

“I should’ve known them their whole lives,” Obi-Wan balled his fists, “and now I have to meet them like some stranger.”

“Ben-”

“Don’t call me that!”

Satine grew stiff, “Forgive me, Master Kenobi.”

Obi-Wan shook his head.

“I won’t contact you until I’ve returned, Duchess, and then it will only be to meet my children.”

He hung up. He hung up on her. Satine screamed.

”Your Grace!” 

The door burst open, Jaym and Gorg came in, their eyes widened when they came to rest on her stomach.”

“Get my ladies, Jaym,” the Duchess ordered, “and Gorg, go to the Med Ward and ask for Nurse Hera.”

The guards bowed, shutting the door behind them. As soon as the door slammed, Satine burst into tears. Throwing herself back on her mattress, the Duchess pounded her fists on the bed until her cohort arrived.

“Satine,” Khaami gasped, trying to restrain her, “you’re going to be alright.”

“Please,” Parna grabbed Satine’s thrashing legs, “I’m sure he didn’t mean whatever he said.”

Hera began calmly singing to Satine in Mando’a, gently rubbing her thumb on Satine’s palm.

“He said,” the Duchess gasped, “he said he wanted nothing to do with me.”

Parna sighed, “Satine, I think he’s just mad.”

“I had no choice,” the Duchess yelled, “it had to be a secret!”

“Sh,” Khaami brushed Satine’s hair from her eyes, “all will be well.”

“How do you know that?” Satine accused.

Khaami explained, “He’s always been very devoted to you-”

“And when he met you again,” Parna added, “the spark rekindled.”

“You are the mother of his children, Your Grace,” Hera handed Satine a tissue, “you two are bound for life.”

That brought tears to Satine’s eyes, “Ben doesn’t say things lightly.”

“But what did he say exactly?” Parna asked.

“He said the next time he contacted me,” Satine sniffed, “would be only to meet the children.”

A silence fell.

“Well,” Hera handed Satine another tissue, “you have some time right?”

“When I was eighteen I bore him twins,” Satine confessed, “And at twenty I did so again.”

Hera was aghast.

“How-”

“My ladies and a medical droid,” Satine explained, looking to Khaami, “Khaami was there.”

The lady nodded, “Her Grace was very strong.”

“But,” Hera stuttered, “but the birth certificates?”

“We have the real ones,” Parna answered, “they’re hidden.”

There were many things Hera could’ve said or done at that moment, this, Satine was certain of, but what the nurse said was kind.

“I’m so sorry, Satine.”

With a sigh, the Duchess lay back down.

“Let me just check your heartbeat,” Hera stood, going to her bag, “just in case.”

Everything was physically fine with her, but Satine knew Jaym and Gorg would need answers.

“My guards,” Satine turned to Khaami, “have them come in, Hera will stand guard.”

Gorg and Jaym were shocked, so shocked, in fact, that they’re eyes nearly bulged from their sockets when they did a double take of their Duchess.

“Did,” Gorg stuttered, “is this because-”

Jaym was much less confused, “It was the Jedi, wasn’t it?”

“No one can know,” Satine stated firmly, “I will allow no jokes, no snide comments, and certainly no illusions to my romantic acquaintances. Do you understand?”

The guards looked at each other.

“Do you understand?” Satine repeated.

The guards saluted, “Yes, Your Grace.”

“Now,” Satine straightened, “I want you to grant Master Kenobi’s personal shuttle access to all of Mandalorian space.”

“Kenobi,” Jaym’s eyes went wide, “I told you it was Kenobi!”

“Kriffing Kenobi,” Gorg gasped, “the Jedi poster boy?”

Satine raised an eyebrow, “What did I just say?”

Jaym swallowed, “No jokes, snide comments, or romantic allusions of any kind.”

“Correct.”

Gorg sighed before he bowed, “We shall do as Your Grace has ordered.”

Satine’s gaze softened, “Thank you.”

Hera came in as the guards left and collected her bag.

“Sleep well, Satine,” she instructed, “you need your rest.”

“I will.”

Parna said nothing, but hugged the Duchess instead.

“Thank you.” Satine whispered.

“We’re right down the hall if you need anything.” Khaami reiterated.

Satine nodded, and then she was left with her feelings. After an hour, she realized she couldn’t sleep and grabbed her comm. She sent the same message to Mara, Tristan, Tyra (who now had a comm of her own), and Korkie. They likely wouldn’t see it till the morning, but Satine needed it off her conscious that she wasn’t hiding her children from their father.

The Duchess hardly slept at all that night. Some time around 2:30 her body crashed and her eyes refused to open, but she didn’t feel refreshed in the morning when Khaami gently nudged her.

“We let you sleep a little later,” she began, “but there is an urgent matter the council needs you for.”

Groaning, Satine rolled over. She could hear Parna in her closet pulling out clothes.

“Please, Your Grace,” Khaami continued, “it’s about the war.”

“I hate war.” Satine whined, sitting up.

“That’s a good girl,” Khaami rubbed Satine’s back, “now let’s get you ready, you have a big day ahead.”

The corset was painful, as it generally was, but it made the Duchess sit straighter in her throne. She was facing the ruling council and some of the clan heads that lived nearby. Satine felt that her usual uniform of purple and blue was too plain for such a gathering.

The new Prime Minister was actually an old one, Jaru Djarin had never liked Almec, he’d always rubbed her the wrong way. So after his four years were up, Jaru ran against him. Due to obvious reasons, she won.

“Do forgive us for meeting early, Your Grace,” the Prime Minister began, “but the head of the Trade Federation contacted me and specifically expressed displeasure in our situation. He would like to meet and discuss new terms.”

Satine smiled, “This is a good reason for meeting early.”

That was met with a few chuckles.

“We shall most graciously accept the Trade Master’s visit,” Satine decided, “did he give any dates that he’s available?”

And so it was decided, the Trade Master would be arriving in three days. There was much to do. Waldie and her seamstresses worked late to add stiff linings into many of Satine’s dresses. Though none knew why. Satine oversaw the menu and preparations for public appearances. It was also decided that the Trade Master and his delegation would be housed down the hall from Satine, Parna and Khaami would sleep in Satine’s parlor. The Duchess also made a friendly call to her dearest acquaintance, Senator Amidala of Naboo, who had much to say on the Trade Federation and their past dealings.

“Interesting,” Satine nodded, “thank you for your help, Padme.”

“Of course, oh,” Padme paused, “and congratulations.”

“What for?” Satine asked.

“Obi-Wan is being traded for Master Fisto in two months,” Padme suddenly became worried, “I thought you knew.”

A heartbeat passed.

“When did he find out?”

“Anakin mentioned it yesterday afternoon,” the Senator gasped, “Satine, did you and Obi-Wan get in a fight?”

“I told him about the children,” Satine confessed, “and naturally he’s not happy.”

Padme sighed, “I’m sorry, Satine.”

“It’s good to know,” the Duchess tried not to sound hurt, “if he chooses he might attend the birth.”

“He might.” agreed Padme.

After a moment of still silence, Satine thanked Padme for her call and hung up. She cried for a little bit, then went to try on her refurbished dresses.

“These are quite snug.” observed one of the seamstresses.

“They should be,” Waldie replied, “that’s how Her Grace likes it.”

“But Lady Waldie,” another seamstress took out a measuring tape, “these dresses shouldn’t be tight.”

Waldie glanced at Satine, “I don’t see how we did something wrong if Her Grace enjoys the dresses.”

“I do,” Satine said earnestly, “that’s why I ask you to touch them up so often.”

“Work on dresses for the Ladies Khaami and Parna,” Waldie instructed, “I will finish the Duchess’ dress.”

Satine nodded, grateful to the seamstress.

“There are rumors, Your Grace,” Waldie whispered, “that you are expecting.”

The Duchess frowned, “I should start leaving trails of fake blood everywhere.”

Waldie snorted, “I suggest you allow the Duke of Sundari to understudy your work with the Trade Master.”

“It will set everyone straight.” Satine agreed.

Parna giggled and the Duchess turned her head.

“I feel like a princess.” the Lady twirled.

Satine’s mind went to her daughters, the nearly grown ones, they should be princesses. A wave of sadness flowed over the Duchess, she wished her children could be where they should be, could claim their birthrights. Unfortunately, if anyone found out about their father…

“Duchess?”

Satine looked up, “Hm?”

“Your advisors are looking for you.”

“Ah, yes,” Satine straightened, “the security for public appearances.”

Gorg and Jaym were Satine’s top protectors, to be with her always. Now that they knew, it was important that she keep them close to her if they had any questions, or if she was kidnapped. Satine tried not to think about the latter.

“Hello?”

“Hi Headmistress Gren,” Satine smiled even though the woman couldn’t see her, “this is the Duchess Satine.”

“It’s good to hear from you, Your Grace,” the headmistress pleasantly intoned, “your nephew has been doing very well in his classes.”

“That’s good to hear,” Satine’s pride decided, “speaking of which, can Korkie be excused for the next three days, I would like him to be here for the Trade Master’s visit.”

“Of course, Your Grace,” the headmistress agreed, “I always enjoy it when a student gets government experience.”

Satine thanked the headmistress for her time and asked if Korkie could be sent home early.

“Of course, Your Grace,” Headmistress Gren appraised, “you should see him within the hour.”

“Thank you.”

The Duchess smiled to herself, Korkie disliked his fittings, this would be fun. The Duke of Sundari groaned when they approached the sewing rooms.

“Lady Mother,” he whispered, quite agitated, “I can’t stand still for that long.”

“It’ll be quick,” Satine assured, “and if you’re good, you can help me taste the deserts.”

Korkie glowed, “Wonderful.”

In the meantime, Satine instructed Parna to fetch a jar of blueberries and a knife from the kitchen while she and Khaami looked for excess hair brushes.

“Why are we doing this again?” Parna asked.

“To quell the maid’s suspicions,” Satine answered, “I’ve heard they’re worried about the lack of bloody material in my trash cans and laundry.”

Parna grinned, “So we’re going to make fake blood.”

“Blueberries were an excellent choice, Your Grace,” Khaami winked, “how clever you are!”

Satine laughed, “I feel like we’re ancient witches mixing a potion.”

Parna snorted. Khaami grabbed a bowl.

“Okay,” the lady began, “put a bunch of blueberries into this bowl and smash them.”

Satine giggled like a little girl as she took her hairbrush and smashed the blueberries. 

“We need to make sure this is thick enough,”Parna added, “how do we do that?”

Khaami grinned, “My mother-in-law once thickened strawberry compote with cornstarch and water, I bet that would work as well.”

Satine nodded, “Get some.”

They finished smashing the blueberries as Khaami returned. 

“Let’s strain the liquid from the berries,” Parna suggested, turning to Satine, “I’ll hold the bowl if you hold your hands out.”

And so they did, it was messy and fun, Satine even got to lick the leftover berry juice from her hands.

“How proper, Satine.” Parna teased.

Then Khaami added cornstarch to the mixture and filled the jar a quarter full of water.

“Now,” Khaami smiled wickedly, “we drop some of our berries into the mixture.”

Once their job was done, the women conferred and decided their potion needed to be redder. 

“We could put some of my blood in.” Satine suggested.

Parna frowned.

“It would have to be somewhere hidden by your dress,” Khaami agreed, “perhaps your leg?”

So a small slit was made in the Duchess’ leg and added to the foul solution.

“Tomorrow morning we’ll put some on your sheets,” Parna decided, “and some on the back of your nightgown.”

Satine giggled, “That will be fun.”

After cleaning up, the Duchess took the Duke of Sundari down to the kitchens, where they would taste desserts. Korkie was smiling so bright Satine was beginning to wonder if he already had eaten some chocolate.

“Lady,” the Duke burst, “Lady Aunt?”

“Yes?” Satine took a bite of her macaroon.

“I think I have a girlfriend.”

Satine began to cough. Korkie laughed.

“Remember when those exchange students from Cerea came?”

“She’s Cerean?” Satine asked.

“Yes, she likes to draw and we traded numbers,” Korkie said excitedly, “and we’ve been talking ever since.”

“That was two months ago!”

Korkie looked down, shy, “She just asked me to be her boyfriend.”

“Korkyrach Kryze!”

The Duke flinched at the Duchess’ giddy tone.

“Tell me her name!”

“Kara Adi.”

“Pretty,” Satine remarked, “surname?”

“Mundi.”

The Duchess paused for a moment, that name rang a bell.

Satine gasped, “I know her mother, Shea, she was the Cerean representative on trade many years ago!”

“Yeah,” Korkie nodded, “her mother’s retired now.”

The Duchess could not be more pleased.

“So,” Korkie took a bite of cake, “what’s new in your life, Auntie?”

[legobiwan]

My incoherent thoughts after watching TLJ a second time

PREPARE THYSELVES I AM FEELING A BIT TALKATIVE

Okay, first off the bat, I’m going to try and list the call-back moments that weren’t as obvious and may or may not have been on purpose. 

The bombs in Paige Tico’s ship? Straight out of the Blue Shadow Virus arc on TCW.

Uh...part of Phasma’s helmet coming off after a strike? Haven’t we seen that before? (OH GOD MY HEART)

The entire Kylo Ren TIE scene. (I’ll try spinning! That’s a good trick! “Follow my lead.”)

Luke BRUSHING OFF HIS DAMN CLOAK LIKE HIS FOREFATHERS BEFORE HIM?

Obviously the elevator scene with Kylo and Rey harkening back to ROTJ. (What is with this entire universe and elevators? honestly) And a lot of the throne room scene, as well.

Follow the spooky wolf animal to safety?

Okay, the whole Canto Bight scene. I LOVE that sequence. Canto Bight is kind of like an inverse Tatooine. Instead of being a wretched hive of scum and villainy, it’s a fancy hive of high-class scum and villainy. And did the Fathier race (space horses) not remind you a bit of a certain pod-racing sequence? 

Okay, that was the fun part. (I’m sure I’m missing some but it’s late and whatevs) and now Luke. Ohhhhh Luke. 

Rian Johnson did his homework. Luke’s whole reaction to the Jedi - Rian took into account the whole history - the Prequels, TCW, Rebels, the OT - and that all led to Luke sequestering himself on a remote island. In many ways, everything that came before the sequels was yes, the story of the Skywalker family, but also the story of the downfall of the Jedi Order. Luke says it himself when he says (I’m paraphrasing) that it was vanity of the Jedi to believe that if the Jedi went extinct, the Light (side of the Force) would be lost. I LOVE that line. I’m a hardcore Jedi defender, and yet he has it right. 

But let’s step back here for a moment. Imagine you are Luke after ROTJ. You’ve defeated the big bad, this Palpatine guy (and remember, Luke probably only finds out about Sidious’s rise to power later). You’ve turned your evil dad back to the Light as he made one last heroic sacrifice. You are literally the last (semi)trained Jedi in the universe. 

It’s a little lonely out there for Luke, especially for someone with his power. And he KNOWS his lineage, how that could go wrong.

So what does he do? Who does he consult? I mean, I guess he could ask ghost-dad, ghost-uncle, and creepy ghost-grandfather troll dude. But they are all from the old Jedi line, even Anakin. And something tells me they weren’t hanging around all that much. So Luke goes and consults some old Jedi texts, tries to rebuild the Jedi in the way that Anakin, and Yoda, and Obi-wan would have wanted him to. 

And it fails disastrously. Because the Jedi of that time failed disastrously, and Luke was just repeating all their mistakes. (I mean, we don’t know anything about this academy, so this is my speculation as to how he got to where he was on Ach-to).

Of course, I can’t move forward without speaking about the Ben Solo almost-murder scene. Yes, maybe out of character. Maybe not. So Luke is half-assing this Jedi Academy thing because he feels it’s the right thing to do (not that Luke is incapable, but he didn’t have any formal Jedi training like Anakin or Obi-wan, and grew up on a backwater desert planet with what was probably not your typical educational system). AND, as an educator myself, let’s just say that DOING something well and TEACHING something well are two very different skills.

So Snoke is hiding out in Hondo Ohnaka’s old stronghold gathering his Forces and doing a spooky brain connecting thing with Kylo, corrupting him. (Okay, one part of the sentence is false and I won’t get into some of the other reasons Kylo turned due to his family and lineage and expectations because that’s been done to death.) 

Luke’s probably a little overwhelmed and he’s been through some things, you know, with the dark side and his family and maybe feels a little self-conscious about this. And THEN let us not forget that BOTH Obi-wan and Yoda urged Luke to just outright kill Vader because he was evil. (I will come back to this point later.) So this idea of killing evil has already been implanted in Luke’s mind, even though he resisted it the first time. 

But now? He’s older, he’s doing what he thinks is the correct Jedi way, and he knows that something is off with Ben Solo. And then he reaches out and there it is, his father all over again. And perhaps there are those voices of his mentors, telling him to kill. Would it happen again? Did he have the strength to fight the same battle again and again? 

It’s Luke, though, so of course, it was only a half-second slip. 

It was enough from Ben Solo/Kylo (and let’s also not forget that Ben was so dark at that point that his first reaction was to fight Luke and go on a killing spree.)

So Luke is guilty as hell and retreats. He realizes the faults of the Jedi Order, their mindset, their hypocrisy, and cuts himself off from the Force. 

Here is what is interesting to me. You know who else thought the Jedi Order was full of hypocrites who couldn’t see beyond the Code?

Dooku.

But what did Dooku do? Join the Sith. (And look, I love Dooku as a character, but let’s be real here.)

What did Luke do? Isolate himself so he wouldn’t be a danger to others. And that, my friends, is a very Luke thing to do. 

And in the end, when it came to fight (as many others have pointed out) - Luke never fought. Not really. He looked great with his father’s lightsaber, but never swung it at Kylo, just danced around. And oh yeah, he was a projection the entire time. The ultimate pacifist fighting (Satine Kryze would be so proud and offended at the oxymoron). 

And the Jedi? Maybe that one Moff was right. They, in some ways, are an ancient religion, with all the issues that come with trying to preserve centuries-old social mores in a contemporary society. Obi-wan and Anakin/Vader’s fights were done in the context of the old. And Luke was that bridge between the old and the new (which we see in Rey and Kylo Ren and stable kid). 

Off topic from the Jedi for a minute, but one of the things I loved about the Ach-to montage of green milk and large harpooning is that it showed Luke being Tatooine Luke - just in a different environment. You know he had to do similar things on Tatooine, and he just adjusted back to his farmstead life, to some degree. And his humor is not lost. Perhaps a little more wizened, but that happens to all of us as we age :)

Now about that failure thing. Let’s remember Yoda’s first famous phrase to Luke on Dagobah. “Do or do not, there is no try.” That’s a long ways away from “failure is a teacher.” And the thing is...both Yoda and Obi-wan failed (to a degree) with Luke. He ran off to Cloud City, got his hand chopped off, and things after ESB weren’t looking so hot. And that’s why I think it’s great for Yoda to come to this and bring it to Luke in TLJ, because it just shows how far the remaining (ghosts) of the Jedi Order have come to look past the attitudes that got them into the Darth Sidious mess to begin with. 

And so, guys, that’s my reading into hermit Luke and why I actually think the entire thing is really cool and a great homage to the entire set of films and tv shows that predated this movie. Oh yeah, and the twin suns with the Force theme in the background nearly killed me WHY DOES EVERYTHING NAMED TWIN SUNS ELICIT THIS REACTION IN ME SERIOUSLY STAR WARS STOP IT

[kenobios]

Staaaaaar waaaaars

@futurecatladies​ said:Also Star Wars because who tf are we kidding

the character i least understand

yoda. he has gone through multiple instances where he learned that two sides of a war need to come together, not constantly fight each other, in order for the force to prosper, that neither one is right or wrong (i.e. the stone giant arc in the comics) or when the force pretty much tells him that having both a dark and a light side is important and doesn’t make you weak/wrong (tcw) but then he goes and does the same shit anyway? like? he’s meant to be this wise old teacher to the other characters but he doesn’t even learn shit for himself. idk. i probably just don’t have the patience to try and understand his character because i know he is the one who caused a lot of shit in the first place. he has his moments but by golly gosh is he a shit-stirrer. i could also say snoke just because i WANT to understand him but we were given so little (which is one of my nitpicks about TLJ, i know a lot of people didn’t really care about snoke but i at least wanted to know why he did what he did, y’know?)

interactions i enjoyed the most

rey and kylo, anakin and obi-wan, darth maul and obi-wan, asajj and obi-wan (pretty much obi-wan and everyone), leia and luke, luke and rey (for what little we got of them)

the character who scares me the most

darth vader. i know he got redeemed in the end but he did a lot of shit that he didn’t even bat an eyelash/didn’t even affect him that scares me to think about. like when he tortures leia and doesn’t even give a shit, or the fact he cut luke’s hand off and still doesn’t care. its his apathy towards the torture and harming of his own children that scares me. like… what… he can torture and harm them but the moment palpatine does it, it’s too far? idk. some people might call me a hypocrite because kylo killed han, but kylo didn’t do it in the same frighteningly emotionless way that vader did. something about how vader does it is very reminiscent of a sociopath to me, whereas kylo’s attempts to be cruel are just feigned and misguided.

the character who is mostly like me

personally i relate to obi-wan the most, and maybe luke. but star wars personality quizzes always say i’m finn or luke.

hottest looks character

leia in all her outfits other than slave leia tbh. or obi-wan of course.

one thing i dislike about my fave character

this is really hard. i honestly can’t think of anything to dislike about obi-wan… i guess maybe i dislike that he was so ready to leave the jedi on multiple occassions (i.e. in the comics when anakin was a padawan and wanted to leave the jedi and obi-wan was prepared to leave with him, or in tcw when he says he would have left if satine told him to) like… he was so ready to leave if SOMEBODY ELSE wanted him to leave, but he never stepped back for a moment and thought, maybe he himself wanted to leave and he was just waiting for somebody else to give him an excuse to leave? idk it’s just so weird that he seems to be so loyal to the jedi yet so ready to leave at the same time like what is the truth, obi-wan? search your feelings. mostly this is me nitpicking tho because i love pretty much everything about him. 

one thing i like about my hated character

don’t really hate a character but i guess i can respect how jar jar was only trying to do his best?

a quote or scene that haunts me

“And then, the black edging of the dark side encircles her bliss like a noose. Because what rides swift on the heels of hope but fear — a fear that stretches out far and wide like a growing shadow. Fear of having a child in an unstable galaxy. Fear of whether or not Han is alive — or Luke, too. Will the child grow up with a father? An uncle? A mentor? What is her legacy and what will her boy’s legacy be?”

also leia giving up on her son will haunt me forever

a death that left me indifferent

many. but the most controversial one would probably be han’s. he was never my favourite in the OT and tbh i never cared much for him, aside from the fact that leia loved him and therefore i was ok with him. but there are a few things i don’t like that he made leia go through (like leaving her alone while she was pregnant and stuff) but anyways. in the end when he died i didn’t really have a reaction like everybody else. i was just like, well. that’s fine. it’s probably why i never had too much of an issue with kylo either after watching tfa lol.

a character i wish died but didn’t

originally this was hux, he was so annoying in tfa i just wanted him to die in tlj, but then he grew on me in tlj and i’m actually excited to see where they take his character in the next film. especially his dynamic with kylo (disclaimer: i don’t ship kylux) because in hux’s last scene he seems to look at kylo with genuine contempt and distrust, and i suspect there will be serious tension between them upcoming, and hux may even be serious and ballsy enough to try and dethrone kylo somehow, which i find interesting. that’s what i gather from his last scene anyway. also, problematic opinion, i sort of think the plot could have done without poe, like if he died in tfa like he was meant to. i love poe and i love oscar but honestly there is too many main characters now for my tastes and the story would have been better off, i think. like it kind of feels like poe took what finn should have been in the story (i like the idea of finn being leia’s apprentice in training for the resistance a lot better, especially given his history as a stormtrooper, it’d be more poetic)

my ship that never sailed

obi-wan and padme i mean i know… it’s not meant to be and i’m happy with unrequited obidala but LIKE!!! just imagine… obi-wan would have treated her so well sldkfjsldkfj like if she survived but i guess that’s where fanfiction comes in

[lurkingcrow]

Ok, so I had a few ideas about an AU of an AU of a crack AU thanks to @albaparthenicevelut @resistancepilots  @aifsaath and @forcearama . And then I got thinking. And then it got a little long. Ok, a lot long. But the mental image had so much potential...

 It all starts on Mandalore. In another universe Satine Kryze holds her tongue and Obi-Wan Kenobi leaves after saying his goodbyes and commits to becoming the best Jedi he can be. In this universe, she asks him to stay. So he does. Oh not immediately, there are after all conversations he must have with his master, apologies he must give, but Obi-Wan meditates long and hard and determines that this is where the force is calling him and so he leaves the order just after his 18th birthday. 

Qui-Gon is devastated at first. But Obi-Wan is no Xanatos - he is not leaving for power, or due to the failings of his master, but for love and the chance to bring about peace to a war-torn planet, and maybe Qui-Gon can live with that. He stays for their wedding, which for all its simplicity given the limited resources is no less beautiful. Qui-Gon does not cry, but his eyes are suspiciously wet and anyone with a hint of Force sensitivity can feel his love and pride half a planet away. Obi-Wan may still have his doubts about leaving, but having his former master's support means the world. Their bond never truly breaks, and frequent holocalls ensure that Qui-Gon is up to date with what his former apprentice is up to (Satine is not above snitching to him about Obi-Wan's reckless stunts in the hope that he can guilt her husband into behaving, and Qui-Gon is thankful for her efforts to keep their relationship strong. He is growing quite fond of Obi-Wan's lady love.).

But it is lonely in the temple without his padawan. And increasingly Qui-Gon is growing frustrated with the senate interference in Jedi activities. The missions he is sent on seem like futile wastes of time, and while he never thought he would say it, he is beginning to see Master Dooku's point about the systemic corruption being too entrenched to overcome. Honestly, these days he suspects he'd do more good running around the galaxy as some kind of vigilante peacekeeper than negotiating yet another inane trade deal that should have been resolved weeks earlier if it weren't for the egos involved... the force pings. Oh.  Qui-Gon Jinn is a master of the living force, of the here and now, and here and now the force is telling him that maybe that's not such a bad idea.

Truthfully there is little left for him in the Temple; Tahl, Master Dooku, Obi-Wan - so many of those close to him are gone. All that keeps him here is his duty, and as a Jedi is his ultimate duty not to the Force? It would be nice to pay Obi-Wan a visit, maybe take a side trip to Serreno to see what his old master is up to these days...

So Qui-Gon leaves, not quite knowing what his plans are but trusting in the will of the Force. He initially sets up on Mandalore, where Obi-Wan and Satine are more than happy to have him (once Qui-Gon has finished convincing his not-son that his leaving the order was not his fault. Satine does not permit emotional constipation in her palace after all.), but soon finds himself restless and sets out again, promising not to get in too much trouble. Obi-Wan sighs and Satine starts ordering the set of armour she knows he's going to need when it comes time to rescue his old master. After all, their future children should have at least one Grandparent to look up to right?

The Force takes him to Tatooine, where an investigation of Gardulla the Hutt ends up with him befriending a local mother and her toddler and confronting the reality of slavery on the Outer Rim. The Jedi aren't coming to free the slaves, but Qui-Gon's no longer just a Jedi is he? And he sees Shmi worry over Little Ani (So strong in the force! And yet so unlikely to ever be found and brought to the temple...) and decides that maybe he can't save them all, but there's no reason he can't try and help those he can. A bit of offhand gambling during the negotiations, a minor favour of two (that the Hutt doesn't realise will end up backfiring but Qui-Gon does) and Qui-Gon Jinn is up a large sum of credits and two newly freed Skywalkers.

(It should be noted that as there are a lack of facilities to provide a midichlorian count, and Shmi is still somewhat reluctant to admit to the whole "virgin birth" thing, Qui- Gon considers Anakin Skywalker to be a strong and promising child but not exactly miraculous. Cute though. Very cute. He likes to fall asleep against his shoulder and Qui-Gon gets nostalgic about all the times Obi-Wan did the same. Shmi looks on, and thinks.) 

They head to Mandalore to get the chips out (and to show Obi-Wan that his father old master is safe and well - minus a cracked rib of two) and  Qui-Gon Jinn is faced with a major dilemma. He really should be encouraging Shmi to consider sending Ani to the temple, where his talents can be trained, but… he looks to where Shmi and Satine are beaming as they watch Anakin attempt to sneak up on Obi-Wan who is assiduously pretending to ignore the toddler's giggles as he reads the latest reports on the rebuilding effort. Anakin inexplicably adores Obi-Wan, and it is to all appearances, mutual.  Qui-Gon has no desire to hurt his former Padawan again, and how could he be so hypocritical as to send little Ani off to an institution he’s not sure he believes in anymore? The question is rendered moot when Shmi bluntly tells him the only ones she trusts with Anakin are currently in the palace, and if he needs teaching Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan can do it. The idea is honestly a little uncomfortable for the pair of former Jedi, but they're coming to terms with what the Force seems to be asking of them.

 Which in Qui-Gon’s case seems to mean a lot of trips to the outer rim among the poor and downtrodden - oddly enough Shmi suddenly decides to come with him, claiming that Ani is safe as he can be on Mandalore, she’s familiar with some of the more unsavory parts of the galaxy and Qui-Gon needs someone to watch his back. He’s just glad for the company,  particularly when he does end up paying a visit to Serenno. Watching a former slave look Dooku in the eye and calmly and quietly call bullshit on his arguments surrounding the role of the trading unions is worth every moment. Honestly, while he may have a point about corruption within the Republic, Qui-Gon is getting a little creeped out by his former Master’s insistence on the need for strong leadership and a firm hand. It sounds like he’s advocating open conflict, and war isn’t good for anyone!

So he attempts to make his goodbyes, but Dooku is reluctant to let them leave, which means it’s time to implement the old “disappear and claim you had a vision” trick. And ok, so I won't go into details, but after a long and complex series of events involving a freight hauler, eight barrels of spiked Telosian Brandy, three janitor droids and a Twilek Dance Company they manage to make it off planet and into Hutt space where they can disappear for a bit.

But a Skywalker is still a Skywalker, not matter how much sense she has, and Qui-Gon Jinn is as much a trouble-magnet as the rest of his line, so thanks to yet another strange convergence of events involving an attempted kidnapping, five tonnes of explosives, a backroom bar on Ord Mantell, a missing shipment of Spice, an insurrection on a mining colony,  uncountable huttese expletives, one inspirational speech, a cache of heavy weapons and no less than eight marriage proposals, Qui-Gon Jinn finds himself the captain of a small fleet of ships and a band of untrained but passionate freedom fighters. Shmi has never laughed so much in her entire life!

Qui-Gon does what he does best and attempts to talk his way out of it, but it is to no avail; “Captain Jinn” is an inspiration to them all, his dedication is unparalleled and they will do all they can to aid him in his quest to bring justice to the galaxy!  Qui-Gon panics and calls in the cavalry. Unfortunately for him Satine thinks it’s a brilliant idea.

Because while she adores her husband, the Duchess of Mandalore has noticed that recently he seems to be going a little stir crazy. For all his denials Obi-Wan is a man of action, and things have calmed enough that he needs a distraction lest she start throwing martini glasses at him to make him stop hovering! Assisting a band of “pirates” in undermining the various interests who take advantage of the lawless nature of the Outer Rim to spread their influence and at the same time giving him the chance to spend time with Qui-Gon  seems like an excellent way to keep him occupied. Also, as Shmi points out, it’s exactly the type of thing that Mandalorians go gaga for - heroic warriors secretly taking out evildoers and doing good while dramatically declaring their own villainy, why it seems like the perfect outlet for those Mandalorians who long for the glory found in days of old!

She’s right. There are plenty of volunteers willing to follow their Duchess’ dashing husband to join his father mentor in cleaning up the Outer Rim. They start out small, intercepting a shipment of slaves, diverting a cargo of pharmaceuticals to a planet in urgent need of medicine, confiscating a hold full of illegal weaponry. But soon they grow bolder, raiding larger and larger targets, always making sure that those they hit deserve it and will only bring themselves greater trouble if they make a fuss about the loss of their ill-gotten gains. Soon their little group has carved out quite a solid support base, and while they never stop wondering why the Force seems so happy about this turn of events, the former Jedi actually begin to enjoy their work. They’re slowly making progress, and eventually they know enough momentum will build that uniting this part of the galaxy and freeing the slaves may one day be feasible. Also, it’s really really pissing off both the Senate and the Order, which means they must be doing something right.

And that is how Qui-Gon Jinn becomes a Pirate King, the Scourge of Slavers, Hassler of Hutts, Bane of the Banking Clan and Terror of the Techno Union. Dooku is grinding his teeth into dust with frustration. Especially since all his correspondence suggesting an alliance is either returned unopened or overwritten with sarcastic commentary and a suggestion to go deep throat a lightsaber.

That’s more than enough for now, I need some sleep, but there is more to this verse I’ve worked out. Tune in next time for “Naboo’s no good very rotten day aka Padme Amidala, Pirate Queen in Exile” “The clone wars start but the clones are late to the party” “Qui-Gon discovers he never actually formally quit the Jedi, and Yoda and Mace take advantage of this” “Plo Koon admire’s Qui-Gon’s taste in pets” and “Oh god, Anakin Skywalker, Mandalorian Pirate Prince, what have I done?”...

[raineydaywrites]

Dark Scandalore au

Okay so I’m too tired to write a full fic and also tumblr has already swallowed this post once, but I want to get down some thoughts about sad scandalore.

- at the beginning it goes much like it did in canon. The Council gets Satine’s message for Obi Wan and are like, “we can’t interfere isn’t an internal matter.” Obi Wan goes anyway.

- he’s concerned because he asked Satine to be careful, but not high key worried yet because he doesn’t know about Maul.

- on the way there in the Twilight he tries to contact Korkie because he knows he’s running with the Nite Owls, but can’t get through. He figures it will work out anyway.

- from there it goes much the same, he steals Death Watch armor, breaks Satine out, they try to leave in the Twilight, it is explodes and maul shows up.

- they get dragged to the throne room and his worry goes up a few notches, but still he’s been through so much and survived all of it and he thinks- he really thinks they’ll make it out okay.

- then maul starts his spiel, chokes Satine and pulls out the dark saber. This is when Obi Wan realizes one of them isn’t going to make it.

- he tries to goad maul into attacking him instead, hoping that he can keep the collateral damage to a minimum, but it doesn’t really work because though maul has a temper, he sees right through Obi Wan right now.

- don’t make me say it.

- okay, so we know what happens next, Satine dies. Her confession goes slightly differently because they are married not just pining from afar, but she still thinks it would b good to remind him that she loves him.

- that’s when it hits. The Dark. He doesn’t Fall, no, he’s not the type, but it’s a closer call than it was in canon (not that it was super close, but you get what I mean). He’s so angry with Maul for what he’s done, he’s grieving, he’s terrified of having to tell Korkie what happened…. it’s a bad time for Obi.

- he pushes it back, reminds himself of his training and tries to breathe through the /pain/ he’s feeling.

- ( he remembers Anakin asking him why he needed the twilight, offering to come along, and his own refusal because he didn’t want to get Anakin in trouble, because two Jedi acting together is less forgivable in the eyes of the Council and Senate than one, and he /regrets/ )

- he’s dragged out by the death watch and saved by the Nite Owls. Korkie is with them. Obi Wan dreads telling him, but he does, finds a moment, because his son deserves to know what happened. He hears a quiet gasp from the people around them, and Bo-Katan turns away from them, grieving.

- he’s afraid Korkie will blame him (force knows he blames himself) but Korkie just looks unbelievably sad, like when he was a little kid and they told him why he couldn’t call Obi Wan “Dad” in public.

- they hold each other for a moment and try not to cry because now is not the time, now it is time to escape. Obi Wan tries to convince Korkie to leave Mandalore with them, but Korkie is his fathers son and he won’t leave people behind who need him. Besides where in the galaxy could he go?

- so obi wan leaves. He pilots a course back to Coruscant, makes himself a cup of tea, and then he falls out of battle mode and has nothing to distract him from what has happened.

- in canon I think he held it together, maybe shed a few tears, but he reminded himself of all he’s learned and pushes it down deep.

- in this au, oh he breaks. He loved his wife dearly and now she’s gone, at the hands of his old enemy and he /breaks/

- he makes it back to the Temple, where he is scolded harshly but the Council, though it doesn’t know the truth, knows he cared about Satine and let’s him go off to his apartment, figuring he can meditate on her death and move on.

- He walks numbly through the Temple and considers. He’s always figured he’d leave the Order one day, when the war is over and they don’t need him as much, but now, where would he go? And so he realizes he can’t let on how much he cared for Satine because it will ruin the only thing he has left going for him.

- Anakin is in his apartment when he gets there, and that was not anticipated, he thought he’d be able to be alone again. Instead, he makes a pot of tea, hands shaking as he pours Anakin a cup, and Anakin can tell something’s off but he doesn’t know what.

- Obi Wan’s voice breaks when he tells Anakin what happens. (Must fix that, he thinks, and he does, repeating the fact that Satine is dead later that night over and and over until he can say the words without emotion.)

- Anakin doesn’t know the whole truth yet, but he knows Obi Wan cared and he’s a good friend, offering him whatever he needs. Obi Wan says he would like some space.

- he spends the rest of the evening trying to meditate, but this familiar action is little comfort now though it does help a little. He just can’t seem to focus!

- that night he lies down to go to sleep and he can’t. He knows why. He’s spent countless nights alone because of the situation they’re in, but he has had nights where he missed Satine and wanted to be with her. He usually holocalled her and talked with her and that helped, but there is no comfort now.

- the next day is even worse because he’s gotten little to no sleep and everyone know he went on an unsanctioned mission to save his friend and failed, and are offering their remorse over the death of his “friend.” It’s the only time he feels like a proper grieving husband- a widower, he realizes with another pang

- he blames himself. Maybe if he hadn’t married her none of this wouldn’t have happened. If he hadn’t been so obvious with his emotions Maul wouldn’t have killed her (he’s wrong, even if they’d stayed apart this still would have happened, but there’s no one to tell him that.)

- everyone can tell he’s not dealing with this the way a Jedi is supposed to deal with losing a friend (and there’s a reason for that, he’s dealing with this as a man who lost his wife). Weeks later and he still looks like death warmed over. No one can get him to talk about it except Anakin. So everyone goes to him with their concerns.

- Anakin confronts him one day, and Obi Wan tells him the truth. Anakin is shocked and horrified. Obi Wan thinks the latter is because Obi Wan has revealed himself to be a hypocrite but Anakin’s soft “you lost your wife?” a moment later proves that to be untrue. Obi Wan expects Anakin to tell the Council and for him to be kicked out of the Order, but he can’t seem to bring himself to care right now. He needs his friend to help him.

- Anakin refuses to say a word to anyone about what he and Obi Wan talked about that day, but everyone agrees it helped. That doesn’t mean it’s over though.

- /everything/ reminds him of her, even things that reasonably shouldn’t, but she’s never far from his mind these days. He finds himself trying not to cry at the strangest times and his mind feels blurred, like he’s staring at the world through a curtain.

- eventually he’s reassigned to the field, and the 212th can tell something’s up, and they have an inkling what it is.

- Obi Wan holds himself tighter and looks a little colder and fights just a touch too hard until one day Cody sits him down and admits that he knew Obi Wan and Satine were involved. Obi Wan gets a chance to talk about Satine to someone for once because all the Jedi expect him to push it aside, but the clones have no such qualms.

- and he probably talks to Padme about it too because like, they’re friends and she knew Satine and it helps

- I can’t decide if this makes Anakin easier to turn or harder, because Anakin and Obi Wan are closer here, so making Anakin think of Obi Wan as an enemy is harder, but also, Anakin has now seen what it did to his friend to lose his wife, felt just a part of his pain through their bond and its worse than he imagined and he’ll do anything to avoid that.

And yeah. That’s my thoughts. ;) @forcearama how do like my twisting of your happy au? I know Star Wars doesn’t need any help to be sad, but like, when the opportunity arrives take it.

[amavitab]

#this is my favourite scene in the entire clone wars series #now let me tell u why #this right here is a woman scorned #don't get me wrong the use of hither and yon does show just how extra satine is #but also. man. she's so ANGRY #not only because she's been called hysteric which honestly was such a bad choice of words #but he's being fucking condescending #he's talking about matters which he KNOWS are important to her #and she knows he knows #if it was anyone else but obi-wan the reaction wouldn't have been so... explosive #but he knows her intimately. he knows her point of view on everything #aND HE STILL CHOSE TO DO THE THING #so it's more than anger; it's actual hurt which surfaces. it's the fact that he was supposed to understand her point of view #(flashback to season 2 when she says the very thing^) #and man #in her point of view he's a hypocrite bc he charges head first into battle and THEN calls her foolhardy?? he plays around with deadly weapons #and she's defending her people and her rights and #im just so emotional#over this scene#stop me

[darkcybertron]

Melt Away - Obitine

Summary: An Obitine twist on Voyage of Temptation

  "And yet some might argue that the strongest defense is a swift and decisive offense." Obi Wan walked towards the duchess, who was sitting on her cushion, and bowed slightly.   She looks beautiful- don't do that! Obi Wan thought to himself.   "You are quite the general now, aren't you, Master Kenobi?" Satine asked.   "Forgive me for interrupting, your highness. I meant no disrespect." Obi Wan apologised.    "Really? Senators, I assume you are acquainted with the collection of half truths and hyperbole known as Obi Wan Kenobi." Duchess Satine introduced.    Obi Wan bowed again to the senators scattered throughout the chamber. "Your highness is too kind."  Satine's eyes looked sad. "You're right. I am."  Changing the subject, Obi Wan spoke up.  "Allow me to introduce my fellow Jedi, Anakin Skywalker."  Anakin stepped forward. "Your servant, milady."  Satine smiled fondly and briefly, taking a drink from the servant droid. "I remember a time when Jedi were not generals, but peacekeepers."  "We are protecters, highness, yours at the moment. We fight for peace." Anakin respectfully argued.   Satine laughed. "What an amusing contradiction."   "What master Skywalker means is that we are acting at the behest of your highness, to protect you from the Death Watch and the Separatists who don't share your neutral point of view." Obi Wan stepped forward.   "I asked for no such thing!" Satine objected.   "That may be so. But a majority of your court did."   Satine's eyes were slits. "I do not remember you as one to hide behind excuses."   "I do not remember you as one to shrink from responsibilities!"   Senator Orn Free Taa took it as a moment to cut the tension. "I am certain we can all agree. Duchess Satine and General Kenobi have proven there are two sides to every dilemma." He clasped his hands together.   Tal Merrik spoke up. "Indeed."   Taa turned to the duchess. "Now, in regard to the Senate vote, we think-" Satine cut the Twi'lek senator off. "I think a multitude makes discord, not good counsel."   "Right again, my lady." Taa walked to the center of the room, right before Satine.   Kenobi turned to Anakin. "There may be two sides to every dilemma, but the duchess only favors hers."                              "A Republic military presence is the only sure defense against the Separtists." Obi Wan argued to Satine, who was sipping from her glass. She rose from her cushion. "Even extremists can be reasoned with."  Obi Wan walked forward. "Perhaps, if one can be heard over the clanking of their battle droids!"   Satine scoffed. "The sarcasm of a soldier!"   "The delusion of a dreamer."    They were face to face, staring into each other's eyes. Everything else seemed to melt away, and both of their faces softened.   Obi Wan didn't know what was happening. His arguments melted away, all he could feel was his love for the duchess.   Satine couldn't handle it, the overwhelming need for something else.   Their lips crashed, there, right in front of senators and a Jedi Knight.   Anakin's eyes widened, despite his own secret, his master was breaking the Code in front of his eyes?  And both of them sure as hell enjoyed it, her soft lips against his, her hand on his cheek.  Until reality hit them like a brick.  They quickly pulled away, both stunned at their own actions.  Obi Wan had his eyes closed, holding hope that nobody saw, though he knew they did, with all the eyes he felt staring at him.   Anakin knew his master needed him to do something. He'd want some distraction right now if that were him, with Padme.   Anakin turned as if taking a call.   "Master, Mixer needs our help down there."   Obi Wan opened his eyes, and turned, quickly walking from the room.   "I never thought I'd see the day." Anakin smirked. Just because he wasn't going to let others taunt his brother about that, doesn't mean he wasn't going to.   Obi Wan shook his head. "Mixer doesn't really need our help, does he?"   "Nope. Saved ya again, old man. Or should I say ladies man?"   "I've never going to hear the end of this." Obi Wan muttered.   "Damn right."                              "Say farewell, duchess." Tal said as he backed Satine up further.   "Obi Wan, it looks like I may never see you again, I don't know quite how to say this but," she shook her head, and looked into Obi Wan's blue eyes. "I've loved you since you came to my aid, all those years ago."    Merrik rolled his eyes. "I don't believe this."   "Satine, this is hardly the time or place for..." He sighed. "Alright. Had you said the word, I would've left the Jedi Order."    It was the truth. But he knew he should've said it straight out, even though she wasn't going to die on his watch.   He should've said he loved her.   "That is touching. Truly, it is. But it's making me sick. And we really must be going." Tal sneered.   "You have the romantic soul of a slug!" She yelled, stomping on his foot and taking his blaster, pointing it at him. "And slugs are so often trot upon."   "Interesting turnabout. But even if I do not deliver the duchess alive to the Separatists, I still win." Merrick said, smirking. He lifted the remote. "The second I'm away I'll hit the remote, and blow the Coronet to bits."   "I will not allow that!" Satine was shaking.   "What will you go?" Tal chuckled. "If you shoot me, you prove yourself a hypocrite to every pacifist ideal you hold dear." He taunted.   Then he turned to Obi Wan. "And you, Kenobi. You are no stranger to violence. You would be hailed as a hero by everyone on this ship." Tal put a hand over his mouth, looking at Satine. "Almost everyone."   Obi Wan glanced at Satine. He couldn't do that. Merrick was right. He was no stranger to violence. But committing an act of the sort, right in front of a pacifist, one, he now realised, he loved very much?   "Come on, who will strike first and brand themselves a cold blooded killer?"     Tal puffed out his chest.   Satine was shaking uncontrollably.   After a long, antagonizing moment, a blue lightsaber pierced Tal's body, and when he fell, it was Anakin who had branded himself a cold blooded killer.   "Anakin." Obi Wan sighed.   "What? He was going to blow up the ship."                                       Satine pulled Obi Wan aside, into a small corridor while the rest of the group trudged on.   "Satine?" Obi Wan asked.    She sighed. "Do you return the feeling?"    Obi Wan struggled for words. "Yes- I- yes."    Then he lowered his voice to a whisper. "I love you, too."    Satine smiled. "Good."   She kissed him, and again, everything melted away, but this time there was no one to stop him.   She tilted her head, deepening the kiss.   Obi Wan knew he needed to stop, to pull away, but he just couldn't.   His hand found her back, and hers, his cheek.   When they finally had to pull away, their foreheads were touching.   "I still would leave the Jedi Order."