#but he was chill

[ethicaltreatmentofcowplants]

sulani: set sometime after this

cw: while i tried to deal with it in a light way (without trivialising the issue), this does allude to consent. nothing happens, everyone’s wishes are respected, and no one is persuaded/pressured to do anything. just in case the subject may understandably be triggering for some though.

(also while I did my best with @akitasimblr's leo harper - or rather my homebrand cc free knock-off - nothing he does is canon unless Ana says it is!)

* * *

"Looking good, Leo. Why, thank you, you handsome devil. Have to say, Ms. “I’ve done more mucking out than messing around” was not the contestant I was expecting this call from. But we all saw her in that bikini. I would hardly refuse."

It was at this moment, Araminta knew that she had fucked up.

(Oooh, he is going to hate me. And completely ruin my chances with Dodo, if not my entire reputation simply out of spite. I know his type too well. Still, Minty. An explanation is owed - and an apology. You come from two long lines of royalty, so you must have a spine somewhere. Find it.)

"I have to say, this was an unexpected surprise, but not an unwelcome one. Can I get you anything? There’s a chardonnay chilling that will knock your socks off. And a few other things too, but we can take our time with that."

"..."

"Uh, Minty? I assume we’re on pet name terms, or we’re about to be. If it’s the chardonnay, I can have something else brought up."

"... .... ...."

"Listen, between you and me, when you get us five star celebrities between the sheets? We’re just Some Guy. Well, some of us anyway. I have it on good authority that Thorne Bailey for example is the worst woohoo. Like not even one star. So don’t be nervous! Assuming that you’re nervous because it’s me." 

(cue Leo's own math lady meme moment)

"Orrrr are you nervous because you’ve changed your mind - and you don’t know how to tell me?"

(looks up at him hopefully)

"Well, I’m taking anything other than shoving me onto the bed as a resounding ‘no, I’m not into this anymore.’ Why don’t I check on that chardonnay, and you take a moment? If I end up having the entire bottle to myself, that’s okay."

"See? It was fine. You are fine. Pull yourself together, Araminta."

* * *

"I… didn’t mean to text you. Your profile pictures look exactly the same."

"Funny how that works. So, you thought that you were texting my brother? And in spite of having at your fingertips the hottest commodity in the entire Simsverse - ie. my own personal private number - you decided that you’d rather attempt a night of passion with that doofus instead?"

"Well... yes?"

(leaves unsaid that there wasn't even a decision to be made. also - ahem. dodo is not a doofus, thank you.)

"But Watcher, everyone knows that I’m the sexy twin!"

(tactful silence)

"I am so terribly sorry, Leo. And quite frankly, mortified. I’d tear up my contract right now if I could."

"Contracts don’t work like that, Princess. Trust me. Don’t sweat it. It’s nothing to leave the challenge over. I can’t promise that I won’t laugh at you later or bring it up on the show at some point, but apart from you being a boring do-gooder, we’re cool. Deep breaths."

"I did, er, bring some wine myself. It’s an aged Chestnut Ridge red from our cellar, and I had thought that Dodo-"

"Totally wasted on him. Give me that."

"Thank you, by the way, for being so nice about this."

"Nice? Ha. I thought you lived on some Henford estate, not beneath a rock. But I’m not a creep. If you don’t one hundred percent want to be here, then I don’t want you here. Period. Go downstairs and get a massage or something. It looks like you need it."

"I may do just that."

"Wait - let’s check that you have my brother’s number right. You may have picked the wrong twin, but there’s nothing wrong with your taste in wine. And if you and Dodo don’t work out, then I’m always happy to mentor a promising up-and-comer." (winks)

"I’ll, uh, bear in mind that generous offer."

"No you won’t. You’re just being polite. Now scram. I’d totally smack your arse on your way out, but the Watcher is too cheap for that pack. And if you ever tell anyone other than Dodo that I wasn’t a total dick to you, I’ll spread a rumour that you once drank white wine with red meat or some other shit that would totally ruin your good name within 'polite' society."

"Plum, she really was that surprised at me being cool with her not wanting to sleep with me. The bar for men is so low, it must be in fucking Selvadorada. Here’s to being the sexy twin. And to all my daughters hopefully being lesbians."

"Hey, this is really a nice vintage. Nice girl too, unfortunately. But I could have fixed her, Watcher..."

[shopcat]

do you want to see the best trail cam photo ever

[swan2swan]

Whoever conceived and animated this moment, I hope they're doing well and thriving. This is S-rank romance stuff here.

[hinamie]

morning glory

[duckysprouts]

brain chemistry changed from no longer you and monster btw

[michameinmicha]

Do you ever miss a character from a show but not like in the way that you want to rewatch the whole show because theres so much stuff going on and thats not what youre looking for but you miss your boy

[roninkairi]

You can only reblog this today.*

*PLEASE READ THE TAGS

[mattmonss]

Father and daughter bonding <3

[chloesimaginationthings]

Michael Afton and Jeremy Fitzgerald are FNAF besties..

[karlyuchka]

I wanna share a little story of what happened with me on evening of 23th February 2022. Approximately 10 hours before full-scale invasion.

A long time I was visiting french classes in Kyiv (in Institu français) and I was returning home in late evening. The road was taking like an hour, bus ride was forty minutes.

I entered the bus like always and saw that it was almost full. Also I heard arguing. Apparently there was a drunk man in the back of the bus and a woman didn't wanna sit near him (understandable tbh). Even though he was drunk, he wasn't really doing anything, so I said that I would sit with him.

Then we started talking (wich isn't really good in the bus and we probably annoyed people around, but no one actually complained). I don't remember who started this conversation, but it was extremely interesting actually.

Before we departed the driver also said that this man didn't pay, which was weird because the driver didn't do anything to throw the drunk dude out.

So I asked him why and how he didn't pay and he said that he actually took part in war in ATO zone, so he can use public transport for free. He even showed me documents that prove it. At first I actually wanted to take it to examine closer, but then he said that no, he wanted only to show it.

I also thought that he was together with another man who was sitting near him, but no I was wrong.

He also gave a weird thing to hold, I forgot how he called it. It was black, kinda small, but very heavy for its size. So basically a type of dumbbell.

Then he talked about life in general and for someone who was drunk, he was extremely articulated and things that he said were actually pretty deep.

Sometimes when I do nothing I suddenly remember him and wonder what happened to him and where he is now. He already went through war, he was drunk in the late evening and the morning he wakes up he discovers that full-scale war started? What did he think at that moment? What did he feel? Did he join the armed forces the second time? I don't even know his name, but I can't help but wonder and worry about him. I don't know where he lives. Is he even alive right now? It's crazy how much I think about someone who is almost unknown to me. He probably doesn't even remember how we talked...

I just hope he's okay right now...

[heavenbarnes]

the obedience that came with your older bf!simon hadn’t started out as inherently kinky. it actually stemmed from a rather vulnerable admission, one that happened to come about as you were riding him.

“i need to follow orders”

it’d caught you off guard, but you’d been quick and accepting with it as your pressed your palms against his broad chest. you’d nodded, panting slightly as you tried your best.

“i want you to hold me down and really fuck me, si”

and that was it, he was gripping tight on your hips and jackhammering his own up into you until your head was tipping back and a fucking squeal was being torn out of you.

the rest was history.

simon explained it as he’d built a career off of following orders, he’d kept himself alive by doing what he was told- being in the right place at the right time.

if you wanted to see him at his best you had to tell him exactly what you wanted him to do.

after a particularly soft evening on the couch, one that would never leave the four walls of your home, where simon was cuddled into your front with your arms wrapped around him- he told you he felt safest when he had explicit instructions.

part of it was just easier that way, like when he didn’t really get the hype about sexting but you told him what you wanted and then you’d both be happy.

the other part of it was that security, he had someone who loved him enough to put him in the right place at the right time and eliminate as many variables as possible.

that didn’t mean spontaneity was out of the question, he could surprise you and you could do the same to him- but once you really got into things, he wanted you to tell him in graphic detail what you wanted him to do.

“just like that, don’t move your hand at all”

“cum inside me, please”

“bend me over, want you to use me”

“look me in the eyes, want to see you when you cum for me”

“lick my cunt, simon”

there was also something in there for him about you, sweet little you, looking this big man right in the eye and ordering him around.

made him weak in the fucking knees.

[boredth]

Close enough, welcome back John Wick

[roguescum]

i love when the straw hats Break someone

[doydoune]

bonus of this comic

[hinamie]

new official illust of them with puppies healed something in me

[albatris]

bonus points if you tell me what you would say